From Your Most Grateful Admirer

by Crystalis McCloud

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Discord, Slice of Life
Length: 3672

Having come to terms with the changes in his heart, he writes one important letter to the princess who gave him the last chance he'll ever need, but soon thinks better on it, deciding to tell her face to face.

He didn't deserve another chance after what he did, but he got one. He got the forgiveness he never expected, from the last pony he ever expected to get it from. In gratitude to her, he writes her a letter, thanking her and her friends for everything.

His mind and heart laid bare both to himself and those who read it. He has the freedom he truly wanted.

But you know what? Just a letter isn't enough. No, he must tell her himself.

Equestria Daily Featured, and proud of it, baby!

Published 2014-05-12 16:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-15 14:57:49 UTC

Words On a Parchment Just Aren't Enough *editted*

Words On a Parchment Just Aren't Enough *editted*

The gentle rays of a warm sunrise washed over Twilight's eyelids, causing her to slowly drift out of the lands of dreams. Eyes still closed, she lifted a hoof from under the velvety sheets on her bed to stifle a small yawn. She lay there in the darkness behind her lids for several long seconds as she let her mind collect itself. She couldn't help but relish in the wonderful softness beneath and around her. She didn't even have to open her eyes to perfectly envision the tall crystal bedposts jutting from the ends of her bed, rising up to support a deep lavender canopy that completely enclosed her.

Twilight could still hardly believe it. She had her very own castle now! And it wasn't just her castle either. It was as much hers as it was Spike's, Rainbow Dash's, Pinkie's, and the rest of her friends'. She and Spike were the only ones that lived there full-time, but it was still for all of them.

Thinking about that did bring a sharp sting to her heart, though. Fresh memories of the Ponyville library that had been destroyed. She loved that old tree. It had been her home for so long that it was hard to believe it was reduced to just a smoking stump only a week ago. Her old home, and all of those precious books obliterated.

She filed away a mental note to have a new, bigger, and better library built for Ponyville when she got around to stocking the empty one in her castle.

In a sudden fluttering of fabrics, her blankets lifted off her, and a strange sensation of vertigo overcame her. Opening her eyes, nothing looked amiss. She was alone in her room, but one little thing gnawed at her mind…

Where were the bed's canopy drapes?

As she sat up, her pillow suddenly slid up her back, ruffled her mane, and hit the ceiling with a soft thud. Beside the pillow, she could see her blankets sprawled over her head, and the bed curtains were hanging the opposite direction that they should.

"What the..." Twilight said, blinking the sleep from her eyes.

She pulled herself up and gave her wings a limber stretch before hopping off her bed and looking out the window. When she looked down out of reflex, she saw nothing but clear blue sky stretching into infinity.

"Whoa!" Twilight groaned as the fog in her head, the sense of vertigo, and the view caused her head to spin. She went dizzy for a moment and fell back on her flank. Another look out the window told her that while the sky was below, Ponyville was above the castle.

Her whole castle was floating upside down. That meant...

"Discord, would you please cut it out?" Twilight grumbled, rubbing her bleary eyes awake.

In a flash, the serpentine form of the draconequus appeared by her side. He was stretched out in mid-yawn, and the moment his mouth snapped shut, the castle was instantly rooted right side up in the ground. Her blankets and pillow plopped back down on the bed, and the curtains draped properly once more.

"Why, good morning Twilight." Discord smiled from ear to ear. "Did you need me for something?"

Twilight sighed, walking to her door. "I think the question is, what do you want?"

With a twist of his floating form, Discord followed after, opening the door for her with a snap of his talon. "Why, whatever do you mean? I was just having a bit of harmless fun."

Twilight had to admit, one part of that was right. His little inversion he'd just pulled was completely harmless. Normally she and the rest of her furniture, not just small items, would have crashed into the ceiling if he'd flipped things like that before. All of his antics had been a lot more tame lately, but somehow still just as chaotic as usual.

"Harmless it may be," Twilight said, nodding in agreement as she headed down the hallway, "but I've dealt with you enough to know that you don't bother me for no reason." She trotted past the door to Spike's new room, along with ones for each of her friends, labeled appropriately with their cutie marks.

Discord's expression turned to one of mock-offense and clicked his tongue chidingly. "Must you always be so suspicious of me? I thought you trusted me now?"

To even her own surprise, a playful smile tugged at Twilight's lips as she glanced up at him. "When did I ever say I didn't trust you? I meant what I said back then; you're my friend. That doesn't mean I can't expect some sort of motive. You are you, after all."

"Aw shucks, you know me so well," Discord waved his paw in a theatrical display of modest flattery. "You really are a wonderful friend."

"Ugh, I can do without the head-rush first thing in the morning, though," Spike's voice groaned from behind them. The young dragon dragged himself out of his room, eyes half shut.

"Ah, good. You're up too, Spike." Discord clapped with glee. "It won't have to wait, then."

Before Twilight could ask what he meant, Discord snapped his talon again, teleporting the three of them to the throne room. Twilight and Spike both landed on soft pillows in their respective seats while Discord took to floating in the center of the circle.

As if reading the question straight from Twilight's mind, Discord produced a scroll of parchment in his claw, explaining, "I'm here because I wanted to talk to you, Twilight. After a lot of introspection this last week, I had initially planned to just send you this letter, but..." The paper suddenly burst into flame and crumbled to ash in his grip. "... Some things are best said face to face, don't you agree?"

Twilight blinked in surprise at Discord. He was being surprisingly serious.

He had written a letter for her? She really wished she could read it, now that he'd burnt it. What he had written, and how he had written it tugged at her literary curiosity. She turned her focus back to Discord though, giving what he had to say the consideration that it deserved.

"Why do I have to be here for this? Isn't it just Twilight you want to talk to?" Spike asked, a growl from his stomach signalling quite clearly where his priorities lie.

"Oh come now, Spike, here I am about to bear my heart and soul, and you don't want to hear about it?" Discord lamented in further theatrics. "I do suppose it is rather rude of me to keep you from breakfast though." Another snap followed, and a bowl of assorted gemstones appeared in Spike's lap, bringing a bright grin to his face.

Looking to Twilight as Spike started chowing down, Discord asked sincerely, "Can I get you anything? "

Still surprised by Discord's sudden shifts in seriousness, it took a moment for Twilight to even realize he was talking to her. She wasn't used to it at all. When her mind finally caught up, she shook her head, "No thank you, I'll eat later. I'd rather hear what you have to say."

A strangely... ordinary smile spread across Discord's face as he bobbed up and down on his tail. Sitting on it like a bouncy stool, he spoke, "I'd like to start by apologizing to you. Sincerely. After Tirek betrayed me, I felt as though I didn't deserve a chance to have friends again. You gave me that chance anyway." The look in his eyes was soft and genuine, something Twilight had never seen before with him.

Twilight couldn't even begin to imagine a look like that being an act, and answered, "Even you deserve a chance, Discord. Besides, I could see your regret written all over your face."

Discord nodded, "Yes, I regret siding with Tirek and hurting my friends, but the thing is, before then, I regretted nothing. Tirek offered me the thing I had desired most of all, and I latched onto it. Turns out freedom didn't make me as happy as I thought it would."

"Discord--" Twilight began, but was but off by his raised paw.

"Before you say anything more, let me explain myself. It may seem obvious, and really quite simple, but everything I've done has a single root: freedom. As the master of Chaos, I am practically the definition of a free spirit," Discord twirled his claw, producing a magic sphere that flashed with images of his deeds. "Almost every bad thing I've ever done has been misguided attempts either to exhibit or protect the freedom I so cherish." He laughed dryly, "The funny thing is, I know now that I didn't even know what freedom really was. I thought having friends only held you back from doing what you wanted to do."

Twilight felt a pang of sympathy for his old way of thinking. Before she had met the other girls, she had only had her family, Celestia, and Spike. She'd been too consumed with her studies to care about having friends. She'd rather read a new book or two than attend a party. Hearing all this from Discord, Twilight felt all the more lucky to be where she was today and have the friends she did.

Twilight nodded softly as he spoke, letting him keep going. It was still so surreal hearing him speak like this though. She never thought he had a side like this.

Discord nodded back in appreciation. He let the sphere in his grasp vanish before proceeding, "Tirek used my desires against me. He played me like a bluegrass fiddle with offers of total freedom. What I didn't realize then, or perhaps just didn't want to admit, was how much Fluttershy and the rest of you had already changed me. Without even meaning to, I started treating Tirek like a close friend, and he preyed on that to get me to cooperate more. That's how I ended up with the pendant I gave you."

Twilight gave another somber nod. She hadn't known all of that before, and it really put everything Discord did into more perspective. She used to be so annoyed with his behavior before too, but thinking back, the signs of gradual change were more and more obvious.

"You may have denied wanting friends, but the more time passed, the more I realized you openly claimed your fondness for Fluttershy," Twilight pointed out. She flinched at the sound of a gem cracking in Spike's jaws, fixing a mild glare on him.

"Hehe, sorry," he chuckled nervously, popping a small emerald in his mouth and chewing with his mouth closed this time.

Discord broke out into a grin despite the minor interruption. "Very perceptive of you, as expected," he affirmed. "Yes, I guess claiming that I only cared about Fluttershy was my way of fooling myself, as well as others." He paused for a moment in thought before breaking into a sly smirk, "Remember when I played sick?"

Discord's entire body turned an all-too-familiar shade of blue, causing Twilight's eyes to roll.

As if she could ever forget.

"In retrospect, that whole incident was as much fun as it was maddeningly annoying," she admitted.

"I do try my best," Discord fluttered his eyes at her.

"Why do you bring that up?" Spike finally chimed in, his now empty bowl resting on the arm of his small throne.

"Glad you asked, little Spike," Discord cackled, the look on his face clearly showing how fondly he remembered that day. "I know I made the joking excuse that I pulled that trick as a way to test how good of a friend you were to me, Twilight. The thing is, even if I didn't want to admit it, that's actually what it was. Ever since the day Fluttershy became my friend, I deep down wanted to feel more of that feeling she gave me. My denial of that feeling, however, led me to play it off to myself and others as a simple prank."

It had started that early?

Twilight felt even more respect for Fluttershy's ability to reform the ex-villain. Not to mention only adding to her respect for Celestia, who saw the potential for Discord to be reformed. Seriously, who would have thought that--

"I suppose you find it strange that the spirit of Chaos has feelings like these, don't you?" Discord smirked, knowing just how eerily close to the mark he was.

"Um, no! No, not at all! I just-" she tried to say, but yet again, Discord's paw rose up to silence her.

"I didn't think so either, believe me. After all, I'm the master of Chaos and all things discordant. I am freedom and independence. Me and my fun are all I ever need!..." With each sentence his tail cranked him up higher and higher until he was stretched to his full length, arms reaching up to the ceiling high above, only for him to deflate back down. "Or so I thought. I've had an epiphany since then."

"An epiphany? What kind of epiphany?" Spike asked, scooting to the edge of his seat. Twilight turned to Spike in surprise, and he chuckled, “What Twi? You didn’t think I’d start learning big words the more time I spent around you?”

The little guy had a point. In both cases. He wasn’t the same little dragon that didn’t know how to spell “precipice” anymore.

Back on subject, Twilight was equally as curious. What kind of revelation could inspire such a change in Discord? She found that even she was subconsciously scooting forward in interest.

Seeing their eager looks of curiosity, Discord chuckled softly, "I realized that I am a part of Harmony too." The confusion in Twilight's expression was priceless, but he kept going despite fighting back his mirth, "Chaos has been called Disharmony, and it is. However, it's not the opposite of Harmony. It's the opposite of Order. Chaos and Order are two halves of the whole that is Harmony. I am half of the bedrock of that whole. After all, in all of your life, have you not experienced countless moments of that very Chaos between the peaceful times? Even without my influence?"

Twilight tapped her chin in thought. He had a good point. Even in the peaceful land of Equestria, there were always difficulties and challenges. There was no shortage of these things, even without the likes of the villains she had stopped. For the most part, though, they were better for it.

"Perfection is boring, stagnant, and without change," Discord elaborated. "But the same can be said living in nothing but Chaos. Just as adversity has made you and your friends who you are, and made you stronger, so has a little friendship, kindness, and peace in my life changed me."

"Aw, that's so sweet, Discord." Twilight smiled, genuinely touched by his words.

"Yeah, it's cool and all," Spike said, breaking into a smarmy grin, "but I think your story needs more explosions."

"Explosions don't solve problems, Spike," Twilight chided him.

"Says the pony that shot massive exploding rainbow lasers all over the place when fighting against Tirek," Spike quipped, his cheekiness only growing.

Twilight fumbled for a retort for a few seconds before relenting with a defeated, "Touche. You win this round."

Just to rub it in more, he licked the tip of one claw and flicked it down through the air as though marking a tally.

Discord kept the conversation rolling with a liberating crack of his knuckles, "I know my role in the world now better than ever, and I won't let it take me over like it has for so many centuries. I'm a new draconequus, and I'll be mending the bonds I broke so long ago. Don't think I'm not gonna tip the world on its head anymore, though. Creating the chaotic and discordant is what I live for, after all!" He swept his arms around in a showy display of excitement. However, he did mention in aside, "I just plan to flip it back when I'm done."

Floating back up into the air, he declared with no shortage of pride, "So if you ever suddenly find you've become an albino, or a mute, or that your castle has become an interesting shade of polka dot, you know who to blame."

Twilight's mind latched onto one particular thing he had said. "Mend the bonds you broke long ago? What do you mean by that?"

A coy smile played across Discord's elongated features. "Oh right, you wouldn't know about that yet, would you? It might surprise you to know that many years before I was sealed in stone, I was friends with Celestia and Luna."

"Wait! You were friends with them before?" Spike gasped, nearly falling off the edge of his throne.

The same look of surprise was mirrored on both him and Twilight, bringing a hearty laugh from Discord.

"That look never gets old," he guffawed. "It's true though. It was a long time ago, but I knew Celestia and Luna before they themselves became alicorns. I wouldn't say we were best friends like me and Fluttershy have become, but we had great respect for each other."

Twilight's head crooked to the side in confusion. What he said didn't add up in her mind. If he had friends long ago, then why would he say that as an embodiment of Chaos, he always relished in his own freedom and independence?

"I only associated with a handful of other ponies, and one very special friend from a distant land," he kept on going. He watched the wheels in Twilight's head start to turn as the inconsistencies piled. "I even had a wonderful apprentice that went on to do great things herself. However, my passions were the undoing of those connections."

The mounting realization shot through Twilight like a spark. Spike, however, was completely mystified, his brow arched in ignorance.

"I relentlessly pursued freedom and wisdom in the deepest depths of magic, and one day, it came back to bite me. My mind and body were warped, and the ties I had were all but severed. I embraced that solitude to prevent my own self-destruction. I took Chaos for what I then believed it to be and it became part of my passion."

Twilight's mouth hung agape in shock at the implications he was throwing at her. She leaped down from her throne to approach him, saying, "Discord, you--"

He pretended not to hear her and pulled back the fur of his lion paw to check a watch he had no doubt just manifested. "Oh my, I seem to be running a tad late. I have such big plans for today," he interrupted her stupefied muttering. "Would you be a dear and tell Fluttershy that I'm on for tea-time at one pm today? You're more than welcome to attend too, if you'd like."

"Discord--"

"Oh it's going to be a wonderful day for some Chaos! And the perfect subject is a certain grumpy centaur. I do believe some forced existential alteration would do nicely. Given some time, that should give him an attitude adjustment."

Despite Twilight's attempts to get his attention, Discord floated back and forth about the throne room. He continually manifested various ridiculous objects like seltzer water, a crowbar, a jack-in-the-box, and a strange black ring, throwing them into a briefcase and summoning a goofy looking sombrero upside down onto his head. The casual dismissal of her after dropping such a bombshell on her only served to irritate her to the point of snapping.

"DISCORD!"

At that last shout, the hodgepodge Chaos Master turned about, his face the very picture of blissful ignorance. A party noisemaker in his mouth unfolded with a dry honk.

Allowing a moment to cool her simmering temper, Twilight took a deep breath before asking, "Discord, do you mean to say that--?"

Before she could even finish her sentence, he held a paw up, interrupting her again. Had she been a lesser mare, she might have decked him for his constant interrupting, but her better judgement and his words that followed served to halt her.

"Discord? Come now, Twilight, we are friends! You really don't need to call me by my job title. My friends are always free to call me by my true name, Starswirl the Discordant." With a wink he added, “And as one eternal student of magic to another, I couldn’t be more in awe of the sorceress you’ve become. You have my eternal gratitude, Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

He disappeared in a flash of light after that, leaving a stunned Twilight staring blankly into nothing. The immense implications of what she had just heard cranked through her mind in a desperate attempt to process. She stood like that for a good five minutes before Spike's voice jarred her back to reality.

"What was that he said about giving a centaur an attitude adjustment?"

"...Oh no."

Author's Note

Yay! I got this done pretty quickly! I was really on a roll with this whole thing, and now I can happily say I have one fully completed story in my repertoire.

Those of you who read this story earlier, you know that there was originally another chapter before this one that had the actual letter that Discord burnt to a crisp. Aside from it being in letter form, it uses a lot of the same little jokes and is very word-for-word with this chapter. So, with the advice of others, I deleted it, but I still have it on Google Drive here if you want to read it.

Barring any unforseen plotbunnies, I hope you fans of this story look forward to my intended sequel story, Forced Existencial Alteration! I make no promises on how long it will take me to hammer it out in my head, but it WILL come out eventually.