Cold Cinnamon Tea

by doctor dapples

Rating: everyone
Tags: Romance, Slice of Life, Sad
Length: 1353

Big Macintosh struggles with his loneliness by taking confidence in a new friend.

Big Macintosh is lonely. He has friends, he has family, but that special somepony… well, he's gone away. And loss brings out complex emotions for any of us.

Luckily, Big Mac has a new friend whom he can confide in over a cup of tea.

Contains elements of M/M

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-12 03:30:04 UTC

Chapter 1

       “Is anypony home?”

        On hearing his sister’s voice from downstairs, Big Macintosh stuck his head out of the door. “Applebloom’s been home for a while now. Granny already made her dinner, so yer off the hook.”

        “I’ll have to thank her before I call it a night then.” Applejack tipped her hat back and sighed loudly. “Its been a weird night, Macintosh! Do you have any idea what’s been going on out there?”

        The red stallion glanced backwards into his room and swallowed. “Eeeee...nope.”

        “Twilight kinda lost it today. She got herself so worked up about not having sent a letter to the princess that she ended up trying to create friendship problems just so she could fix them and write about what she learned.” She chuckled to herself. It sounded particularly ridiculous when spoken out loud. “She cast a magic spell on one of her dolls to get ponies to fight over it, and next thing she knows the entire town is tearing themselves apart over the darn thing.”

        “Well...” he chuckled. “That sounds rather silly. What all did you see?”

        Applejack shook her head. “Not much. I saw the mob, but around that time, Princess Celestia came and sorted it all out. We were scared that she was gonna take Twilight away from us, but now we’re all writing letters about friendship. She’s a crafty one, that Princess.”

        “So, uh...” Macintosh thought for a moment, trying to find the right words. “What happened to the doll?”

        “Beg pardon?” Applejack looked up the stairs at her big brother.

        “Nah, I just mean...did Twilight ever get her back?”

        “Oh. Nah. She didn’t really talk about it, though, so I don’t think she’s really all that torn up about it.”

        Big Macintosh nodded, and tried to hide his smile.

        “Wait a second...why would you call the doll ‘her’?”

        “Can’t talk anymore, AJ! I gotta get some sleep!” Big Mac made a large, very theatrical yawn. “Sure am tired! I think Granny left some dinner for you in the kitchen! Good night!” He yanked his head back into his room and the door closed tightly.

        Applejack just stared at the door from the bottom landing. “Weirdo,” she said to herself, then trotted into the kitchen to see what was left over for her.

        Macintosh concentrated hard as he slowly flipped the lock on his bedroom door. Applejack was very dear to him, but she had the obnoxious habit of bursting into his room whenever she got the notion. Right now, he needed the privacy.

        Scratch that.

        They needed the privacy.

        “Sorry about all that, Smartypants. Did you want some more tea?”

        He turned to look at the doll, who sat in one of Applebloom’s old chairs at Macintosh’s bedside table. He had found Granny’s old tea set, and had set up a private party for him and the rather worn looking stuffed pony.

        Macintosh raised his voice an octave. “No thank you, Macintosh. I still haven’t finished this cup.”

        “Suit yourself,” he said, and took a sip from his own cup. Mm, cinnamon. He looked up at the doll. Her head was sagging, gazing down at her notebook with her one good eye, a round blue button. Her other, a red button, dangled precariously from a string. He wondered how discreet Rarity could be? “Anything botherin’ you?”

        “I’ve just reached a bit of a standstill in my homework. I’m stuck and don’t know what to do next,” said Smartypants.

        “Maybe I can help?”

        “How much do you know about griffin political movements?”

        Big Mac chuckled. “Not a dang thing.” He took another sip of tea. “Maybe you should just take a break for now.”

        “Sounds like a good idea. What do you want to talk about, Macintosh?”

        “Anything is fine.”

        “You talked to your coltfriend lately?”

        Big Mac almost choked on his tea. “Different subject.”

        Smartypants’ voice came back concerned. “Hey, you said we could talk about anything.”

        He glanced over at the picture next to his bed. In it, he was smiling, with a foreleg wrapped around a dark green unicorn stallion. “What’s there to say? I miss him, alright.”

        “Well, what’s stopping you from visiting him? Canterlot’s not that far away.”

        He shrugged. “He’s got his work at the Academy. I’ve got the farm. We’re just both too busy to synchronize our schedules properly.”

        “Don’t you want to see him?” said the doll.

        Macintosh slammed his teacup down on the table. “Of course I want to see him! But he’s already doing more work than he can handle! I can’t just show up there and say ‘Hey! Now you have to make time for me too!’ It wouldn’t be fair to him.”

        “But he’s not just busy, Macintosh. He’s lonely. He could use a good friend.”

        The stallion’s head drooped. “He’ll make friends.”

        “You know as well as I do that’s not his forte.”

        “That’s just it, Smartypants. He thinks he has nothing to offer anypony. I don’t know why he’s so hard on himself, but he is, and he doesn’t see how wonderful he is.” He shook his head with a sigh. “I’m torn about it.”

        “How so?”

        “On one hoof, I want him to realize how good he is. How good he can be for not just me, but anypony. As a friend, as a lover, whatever.”

        “And on the other hoof?”

        “I’m worried when he does, he’ll meet someone new. Someone who can keep up with him better than I can. One of these days, he’s gonna wake up and realize he’s too good to be with a slow-moving farmpony who doesn’t know about griffin history.”

        “Now who’s being hard on themselves?”

        “Hey...bucking look at me. I’m pouring my soul out to a doll.”

        The doll sat there for a long time in silence, and for a moment, Macintosh seemed to forget that he was talking with himself. He cleared his throat and resumed talking, in the doll’s voice. “I’m a little resentful of that remark.”

        “Well, you are just a doll.”

        “I am a doll, but not JUST. You’re talking to me because you needed someone to listen to you, and that’s why I’m here. You’re lonely, too.”

        “eeyup...”

        “But at least you have the familiarity of your family and all the ponies in Ponyville who would be willing to listen to you whenever you’re comfortable enough to open up. Him, on the other hand...” Mac felt his eyes drawn back to the picture. “...he’s in a new place, with new ponies. And they’re working his hooves to the bone. If you’re scared, how scared do you think he is?”

        “But what if he gets sick of me?”

        “What if he does? What if you get sick of him? Things might fall apart when you go see him. Or it might be the sort of move that makes your relationship that much more important. There’s no end to the possibilities, good or bad, and there’s no way to be one hundred percent certain until you actually make that step. The only way you can be certain of anything is to keep doing what you’re doing, in which case, you can be certain that you won’t last.”

        Macintosh stared at the dingy plush toy. “How do you know all these things?”

        “I don’t know anything. I’m just a toy. You’re the one who knows what needs to be done.”

        A very satisfying answer. He turned to look at the picture one more time, and gave the unicorn a smile. “I’ll be seeing you soon.” He lifted the yoke off of his shoulders and placed it on the floor, near where Smartypants sat over her tea. “Are you going to finish that?” he asked her.

        The doll was silent.

        Big Mac nodded thoughtfully. He picked up the doll’s teacup and drank down the whole thing in one gulp. A little cold, but still a nice treat, especially before bedtime. After setting the cup down, he carefully picked up Smartypants and climbed into bed. Before long, he was fast asleep, a hoof wrapped around her soft grey form.