The Best Night Ed-er

“You and your nefarious scams!”

“Like you were pickin’ daisies. YOU built the stupid thing!”

“If you had payed attention to what I said and NOT push the red button!”

Ed watched in horror as his friends Double D and Eddy continued to fight. He couldn’t handle watching it. He had to do something. “STOP! I demand you tickle each other right now!” He yelled.

“STAY OUT OF IT ED!” His friends yelled back.

Ed turned around and held his hooves over his head, wishing for all of this to be over. “The evil dark side has consumed them both.” he whispered to himself. “Trouble. Bad. Pain!” He turned around to see that his friends were continuing to fight.

Hooves were flying until Double D finally pushed Eddy off him. “I’ve had ENOUGH!” The red unicorn yelled. “I’m returning home!”

Ed got on his knees and scooted over to Double D. “But we can't go home Double D.” He sobbed, holding his hooves like a begging pup.

“I’d rather face my consequences, Ed, than wander aimlessly with a so called ‘friend.’” And with that Double D turned around and walked away.

“FINE!” The yellow pegasus yelled. “Go home! Who needs ya! I’ll get to my brother’s house with or without you.” Eddy then opened his wings and flew in the opposite direction. Leaving Ed in the middle.

Ed looked back and forth in horror. “But guys. We need to-”

“SHUT UP ED!” They yelled as they continued to get further and further away from each other. Now they were no longer in Ed’s view. It was just him, all alone, by himself, with no one else around.

Ed couldn’t take it anymore, he took a big breath and laid down to cry his eyes out. He couldn’t believe that he had now lost his only friends, and now he was alone. “Say it ain't so” He said “We are three no more. Like hop and no more skip and jump, just up and no up and away, like blah without the other blahs”

“Hey Ed!”

Ed looked around, bewildered. “Eddy, Double D?”

“Will ya just get up stupid.”

“Must you be so ignorant Eddy?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well how else am I supposed to wake him up? I would have splashed water on him, but we don't have any-”

Ed stood up from his bed, smashing his head on the bottom part of the top bed while doing so.

“Um, Ed?” Double D said. “Are you alright?”

Once he was done looking at the stars, he grabbed Double D and started crying on his shoulder. “Oh guys it was terrible, there was fighting and yelling-”

“We know Ed.” Double D said, struggling to get out from Ed’s grip. “We were hearing you in your sleep, I’m pretty sure you had that dream again.”

Eddy facehoofed. “Will you just get over it. It only happened once, and even then we still-”

“But it was a very traumatic event for all of us to experience Eddy,” Double D interrupted. “it was the first time me and you had a real dispute and actually tried to hurt each other.”

Ed looked at Eddy, eyes completely watered down. “It was horrible, you were wanting to go by yourself Eddy,” Ed then let go of Double D and pointed at him. “and you were wanting to go home, leaving me to stand in the middle while you guys-”

Eddy ran up to Ed and grabbed him by the neck “Ed! Listen to me, don't take this as me being a sap or something, but,” Eddy looked at him and Double D. “its gonna take a lot more than some dumb old fight to separate us. alright?”

“Right!” Ed yelled happily, then Eddy let go of him and slowly started walking away.

Double D’s jaw couldn’t close after that. “Why Eddy, that was-”

Eddy lifted one of his hooves in the air and waved behind him. “Yeah, yeah, can we just get off this train. Canterlot waits for nopony boys.”

“Actually Eddy,” Double D raised a hoof. “we’re not there yet.”

Eddy spun around. “Say what?”

Double D looked out the window and motioned the others to do the same. “This is the second to last stop before we get there.”

“What!” Eddy flew into the air and hit his head on the roof. “Ow...Why are we not there yet, we’ve been on this train forever.” He landed back down on his flank and rubbed his eyes.

“Actually Eddy, we've been on here for roughly fifteen hours.” Double D stated.

“Same thing!” Eddy yelled. “Where did we even stop at anyway.”

Double D looked around his bed. “Well, If I could find the-”

Ed popped his head out from the covers, making Double D land on the floor, he looked up to see that Ed had a map in his mouth. “Fund ieht.” He said.

Double D got up. “Um, thank you Ed,” He used his magic to yank the map out of Eds mouth. He looked at it in disgust. “Oh my lord. Ed, you've completely covered this in your saliva,” Double D opened it to see that- “Its eligible!”

Ed pulled himself out of the bed and landed in front of Double D and Eddy. “No thanks are necessary.”

Eddy crumpled up the map and threw it at Ed’s face. “Way to go mono brow, now how are we supposed to know where we are?”

“All off for Ponyville!” A voice in the distance yelled.

The Eds looked out the window to see that others were starting to get off the train. Eddy couldn’t get a clear view so he pushed his friends out of the way, making Double D land on Ed’s back. “Ponyville? What kind of town names themselves that?”

Double D got off of Ed and said. “Well Eddy, maybe the ponies in this town didn’t have many names to call it by.”

Eddy looked away from the window and shook his head. “Or maybe they couldn’t come up with a better name.”

“Come now Eddy, I think Ponyville is a great-”

Ed sprang into the air and yelled. “New town!” He grabbed Double D and Eddy and started running off the train.

“ED!” Both Eddy and Double D yelled, they remembered this happening before at the last stop they were at. Ed had wanted to get off to see the place, but they didn’t want him to wander off, now it seems that Ed wanted to take them with him. Eddy grabbed Ed by the ears and pulled. “Ed, we are not gettin’ off here!” Eddy yelled.

Ed continued running despite the pain in his ears. “But Eddy, there could be cool things in this town.”

Eddy let go of Ed’s ears, the force of it tripped him and he landed flat on his face on the pavement. Eddy and Double D wiggled their way out of Ed’s grip and looked around to see that they were not inside of the train anymore. Double D looked around the area and spotted a nearby flier, meanwhile, Eddy looked down at Ed in frustration. “What ‘cool things’ could this dump have then what we have in the colt-de-sack Ed?”

“Oh my, Eddy, look at this.” Double D levitated the flier to Eddy, still frustrated, Eddy grabbed the flier and looked at it in anger, then confusion.

“‘Welcome to Ponyville.’ What is this?” Eddy was about to crumple the paper and throw it away, but Double D pulled it out of his grasp before he could.

“Its a flier Eddy, it shows all the many enjoyments you can have in this town.” Double D started flipping through the pages. “Lets see...They have a school, and spas, and...”

“And…” Eddy crossed his hooves while Ed slowly got up from the ground.

“They have a forest and...ooohh, a library.”

“Yawn.” Eddy said sarcastically. “Does this town have anything good?”

Ed grabbed the flier and looked at it. Double D looked at him in annoyance. “Ed, can I please have-”

Ed’s ears lit up. “They got a candy shop here guys.”

Eddy’s and Double D’s ears lit up as well. “Candy shop?” Eddy said.

“Yup, oooh, and a dress shop too. Can I wear a monkey suit?”

Eddy grabbed flier and folded it to compact size. “Did you hear that sock head, a Candy shop and a dress shop, that's almost perfect.”

Double D regained his composure from hearing a place that could sell jawbreakers was here and said. “I understand the importance of a candy store being here Eddy, but why a dress shop?”

Eddy flew into the air above both of them “Well duh, we’re goin’ to a party, right?” Ed nodded while Double D raised an eyebrow. “And everyone knows that when you go to a party, you need a suit.”

“But suits cost money Eddy.” Double D pointed out. “And this part of the world has a different currency called ‘bits’ which we have none.”

“So?” Eddy flew right in front of Double D. “All we need to do is find a pony whose stu- or uh, generous enough to lend a couple of spare suits for all of us.”

“Can I have a monkey suit Eddy?” Ed asked.

“But Eddy.” Double D interrupted. “It takes more than a suit to show you are someone of importance at the Gala.”

“That's where you come in Double D.” Eddy said while landing on all fours.

Double D pointed a hoof at himself. “Me? What am I supposed to do?”

“You’re gonna be the one that ‘teaches’ us how to” Eddy spun in the air a couple of times and landed in a suggestive pose and said. “dance.”

“Dance?” Double D began to sweat. “Why? And how will I teach you two how to-”

“You won't, what you’ll be doing is using that horn of yours to our advantage.” Eddy tapped Double D’s horn, causing him to quickly shy away.

“Oh no.” Double D said. “I will not take part in any of this if it involves the use of my magic.” Double D crossed his hooves and looked away from his friends.

Ed ran up behind him. “Aw come on Double D, can’t you use your cool powers just one-?”

Double D magically zipped Ed’s mouth shut. “And that's another thing, there not powers Ed.” He turned around and gave Ed a look of hatred. “Its magic that was given to me at birth, and I would much rather use it as minimal as possible. Mother and father would agree.”

Ed looked down in shame while Eddy rolled his eyes. “Can’t you just stop your whole pacimagicfist act and just help us out? This is a major part in the scam, would you want to disappoint us?” Eddy could never understand how a unicorn like him hated using his magic to the fullest extent, the smallest thing he would do is levitate stuff, and Eddy was hoping he could use his magic more, but Double D just hated using it on major things, he would even use his hooves to put machines that Eddy needed to use, with his hooves, and not his own magic. Eddy groaned and grabbed Ed’s head, holding it up for Double D to see. “Just try saying no to that face sock head.” He said with a smug grin.

Double D looked away at first, but he eventually took pity at Ed’s sad face, like he usually does. “Oh, alright.” Double D lit up his horn and unzipped Ed’s mouth. “But only this once.”

“YAY!” Ed lept into the air in joy, then he stopped mid way and said. “Now what do we do?”

Eddy flew up to Ed at eye level and said. “Simple, we split up. Ed, you go to the candy store and see if they have jawbreakers.”

“Gotcha Eddy.” Ed, still in the air, dashed off into the town.

Eddy landed next to Double D and said. “And you are gonna find somthin’ to make me and Ed dance.”

Double D rolled his eyes. “I’ll go to the library, I suppose, and what will you be doing?”

Eddy smiled. “Me? I’ll be finding a pony that’ll get us some snazzy stuff to wear at the Gala.”

“And just how will you accomplish that without any money?” Double D asked.

Eddy flew into the air. “Just watch me, I’ll be back here in two hours,” He held up both his hooves. “and I’ll be carrying three” He held up one of his feet. “brand new, pressed and ready clothes for us to wear. Now hop to it sock head.” Eddy dashed off, leaving Double D by himself.

Double D shook his head. “I’m surrounded by idiots.” He mumbled to himself. He lit up his horn and teleported the book that he had been reading to him, he then groaned. “I need to stop doing that!” He held the book in front of his face and started walking into town. “Just walk next time Eddward, you have hooves, you can use them too.”