"Well. This is awkward."
Sombra had been through much stranger than this right? He had tea with the God of Chaos (Fun!) been killed TWICE (Painful!) and had ruled over the Crystal Empire (As You Do!) but naught much had confused him as much as a screaming female alicorn falling from the sky even though she had wings to fly with! Oh wait She's gonna hit meeeEEEEEE!!!
*BOO... I mean CRASH!!*
"Ow..."
"My stomach hurts..oh, would you look at that I've been impaled...IMPALED!?!?!" the Alicorn pulled herself off of Sombra's horn the blood dripping out of her stomach "Damn." she cursed as she died only to resurrect in 2 minutes (give or take a few seconds).
"Ow..."
"I'm...alive...at least I think I'm alive."
"Ow."
"I may still be dead though and just be in heaven or someplace like that..."
"Ow!"
"but still I could be dead...But, Anna might need me! And Olaf! His cloud won't refresh itself! Oh i'm an idiot!"
"OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed sombra frustratred at this immortal-mortal who dared to die by his horn... oh wait that was what he wanted.
"Sorry about being stressed over how i died and am a Pegacorn...I'm diggin' these wings! oh I'm sorry! My name is Elsa, Queen of Arendale."
"I half-figured your an Alicorn so of course your going to be a queen you stupid bucker." her questioning look told him loads. "Let me guess... you're from a different world, were a Queen there and got sucked through a magical portal turning into an Alicorn as you did so hm?"
"Um. Yeah that sounds right."
"Dayum I'm good! right come on then."
"Where are we going?"
"I'm going to sell you to a slave trader so you will be sold as a slave. OK?" judging the ice freezing his armour and the entire environment causing it to snow and the petrified look in Elsa's eyes he had scared her "Don't you know the meaning of the word 'Sarcasm'?" asked Sombra
"Ooooooohhhhhhhhhh." she said "My Sister Anna likes to use this 'Sarcasm' apparently. I personally don't know what it means nor have i used it but it sounds fun!"
"Are you actually special?" asked Sombra with a look of disbelief on his face
"Yes my Parents say I am! or they did...they died when i was 15..."
"I-I'm Sorry...I know how you feel..."
"Yeah but I can freeze stuff really easily! Watch!" shouted Elsa as she raised her hooves... and fell flat on her face (note to self: If I become a Dragony, NEVER try to stand on two legs.) It had the intended effect as ice doused the entire field into a frozen wasteland.
"Oh." gaped Sombra as his hooves froze to the ground "Cool (get it! 'Cool'!) now, unfreeze me mare!"
"Ummmmm, no can do i'm afraid."
"Fine, Please." Sombra spat the disgusting word out like it was a disease filled with vile disgusting...stuff.
"Still no-can-do...I can only thaw you with the power of love and unfortunately my sister is not here so can't unfreeze you unless i love you or some other person who passes by...sorry." replied elsa looking down at the ice/ground "Are you OK?" Sombra's eye was twitching and his fanged mouth was wide open as his forked tongue slipped out
"Just to warn you I'm going to scream now OK?" whispered Sombra
"Thanks for the warning." said Elsa placing her hooves over her ears
"BUUUUCCCCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thawing a Frozen (and Dark) Heart
"This mare is thick. I'M Thick" Sombra thought to himself as he stood there (Well have you ever tried to sit down when your hooves are stuck to ice? I THOUGHT not!) cursing the mare in front of him with the most unrepeatable oaths (These unrepeatable oaths were : "When I get free I'm going to kill her but first (He paused for dramatic effect) I'm going to RAPE her!" Neat! "Shut up inner-self nopony likes you." "Its TRUE!" cried the sobbing personality as he faded from the dark, Ethereal plane of Sombra's mind. Sombra had to sit he tried and failed "BUCK!" he screamed at the skies
"No foul language around me mister." replied Little Miss Weak-And-Pathetic-Snow-Daemon-Who-Can't-Do-Shit-For-Um...-Shit?-Who Had-Also-Figured-Out-What-Buck-Means-Taking-Away-His-Only-Happiness. His correct title for her (because he was always right and if someone said he wasn't he impaled them and chopped of their head screaming like a madman "DECAPITATION!") suited her very well.
She said "There, Enough wood to last us tonight, Do you have kindling material?"
Sombra stopped, stared and said one of the most famous phrases ever said in the history of Equine kind. One so universally shared that everypony from the Griffons to the Minotaurs, from the Schoolcolts in the playground to the Lowliest Servant to the Higher Ranking Nobles to the Princess' themselves and even to Alien Commanders, he said a Universal Phrase
"What The Buck?" (Like I Said Universal) "If Your Talking about fire Little Miss Wea-"
"Elsa."
"DO NOT QUESTION MY TITLE FOR YOU ELSA!" Sombra roared at her he was making no jokes now. He really was going to sell her to sex slave traders. He could use the money. Seriously. Elsa looked at him "Ah shit." said Sombra as Elsa burst into tears "Noctournala, You were one insecure little filly." he thought to himself as he used his magic to light the fire and asked Elsa to sit by him as she sat next to him he felt a pang of guilt as her tears drenched his legs (and rusted his awesome armour) "Calm down I-*Gulp*-I-Apulerguise"
"What?" said Elsa cheering up at the tyrant trying to say sorry
"I apurlergise."
"Again."
"I apolerguise."
"Clearly."
"I apologise!" said Sombra
"Thanks!" said an enthusiastic Elsa. Sombra went into a huffy mood. "I never got your name..."Elsa asked. Sombra smirked.
"King Sombra, Ruler of the Crystal Empire, Breaker of Crystal Ponies, God(ish) of Crystal and Wielder of the Dark Arts!" he finished
"Well Sombra looks as though that fire you conjured up is melting the ice!" squealed Elsa
"I could have freed myself?" inquired Sombra.
"Probably, Im going to cover my ears OK?"
"You do that." Smiled Sombra
"OK!" said Elsa as she put her hooves over her ears. Sombra took a deep breath, looked to the skies and opened his mouth
[size=2em"]BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!"[/size]
