Sunshower

Back in Equestria,

Princess Celestia stood before six selected mares. The expression on her face was strongly affected by gravity. She was anxious to see if these ponies could save Equestria.

"Greetings, loyal subjects! Soon, I will shape you into mares capable of taking this difficult task." Celestia said, while pacing in front of her line-up.

"Princess Celestia," a young Zebra started, "Princess Celestia, good afternoon. What is this task, and what do you mean by 'soon?'"

"The six of you must defeat Discord." Celestia said matter-of-factly.

"You mean the destroy everything, drink glass, chocolate rain, blow shit up Discord? Or the cute and cuddly, suck his thumb Discord." A white unicorn with a neon blue mane spoke next.

"This is no time for games!" Celestia roared.

"Um...I need to be someplace," a cream-coated gardener pony informed, "I promised Daisy I'd-"

"LOYALTY!!!" Celestia yelled at the pony while pointing at her with intensity.

"What?" The pony asked.

"You are loyal to your friend, Daisy. I'm glad, and therefore you are the element of Loyalty.

"Trixie thinks this is bull-shit." A soft-blue unicorn spoke out of turn.

"HONESTY!!!! You were honest about your feelings towards this ordeal, and therefore, symbolize the element of honesty."

"Cool." The white unicorn said, randomly.

"KINDNESS!!! Such a complement to your peer!"

"Umm, okay." The unicorn said while nodding her head rapidly. In doing so, her purple sunglasses fell onto the marble floor. "Oh, crap."

"Here, lemme get those for you." A blue maned pegasus grabbed the glasses with her mouth and returned them to their owner.

"GENEROSITY!!!! You donated your time to retrieve the item of a stranger to return it."

"Urm, It was only, like, two seconds."

"I could kill you in two seconds." Celestia's voice ran cold.

"Celestia, this insanity, what is your reason? Has Discord committed treason? Whatever it is, your crazy and my homeland is far beyond your reach, so I wonder sometimes if to you I should preach."

"LAUGHTER!!!!"

The zebra looked very confused. "Urm...To the title you've given me, I will not pout, but what is there about me to laugh about? To some, I'm not funny at all, and to most I'm as creepy as a spiders crawl. "

"I found it funny that you'd question my supreme power. Because you know as long as I control the sun," Celestia's voice, again lost its warmth, "I control LIFE."

Everypony in the room was scared and or annoyed. They've all been appointed false titles to go on and fight a powerful force they had no business messing with, except the pegasus mare in the back with blonde mane. She hadn't been appointed with anything. Everypony walked up to her and watched her to see a reaction. All they saw was her left pupil move slightly toward the right while the other stayed in place. Bubbles started to form through her lips.

"MAGIC!!!!" Celestia declared, then everypony stared at each other in disappointment.

"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, PRINCESS!" Trixie objected. "I'm more magic than this buffoon! I'M THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE!!! And if anypony deserves the title of 'magic', it is Trixie."

Celestia looked at Trixie for a few seconds. "How would you like to spend your spring vacation on the moon?”

“Uh...well, uh. Trixie will settle for honesty. A-after all, It’s one of her many, many virtues!”

“Good. Okay, My little solders, follow me to the dining hall where we will eat a fine dinner and discuss the problem you will all solve.”

Everypony was against the whole idea, but they didn’t want to eat moon rocks for the rest of their lives, so they followed Celestia in a single file line  down the magnificent corridors of the castle. The two pegasi of the brigade floated after a while because their legs were tired. The unicorns and the earth ponies nearly died.

“Alright, everypony take a seat.”

It was midnight, and it was evident. The room was mostly glass and moonlight flooded nearly the whole area. It gave it a nice mood, so as the ponies sat amongst the large, marble table, tension seemed to disappear, and everypony felt a bit looser.

“What’s for dinner, your highness?” The pegasus with her cyan mane asked, politely.

"Before we even get to dinner, I'd like to get to know you girls." Celestia put her hooves on the table and looked at the moon, then returned her gaze to her militia. "Starting with you, what's your name?"

"Oh, I'm Cloudchaser."

"And what do you do?"

Cloudchaser pointed to her flank. "I do the weather. Push clouds and stuff."

"How wonderful. And what about you?" Celestia pointed to the white unicorn that had taken her sunglasses off to see, revealing her vermilion eyes.

"Names Vinyl Scratch. My stage name is D-Jpon3. I'm a disk Jockey." Vinyl said, proud of herself.

"Hmph! Anything you can do, The Great and Powerful Trixie can do better. Just give Trixie a set of turn tables and she'll show you."

"What's your deal?" Vinyl questioned.

"I'm gonna take a shot in the dark and guess your name is Trixie?" Celestia said sarcastically.

"WRONG! You, princess or not, will address Trixie as THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE! Here's Trixie's card."

Trixie gave her card to the princess. It read:

COME AND BEAR WITNESS TO THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE! ANYTHING YOU CAN DO, TRIXIE CAN DO BETTER.

It ended with a picture of Trixie's cutie mark, a magic wand. It was hard to see, but the princess managed.

"Lovely." Celestia mustered to say. "And how about you, young mare? What's your name?" Celestia fixed her gaze on the pony near the end of the table. She was rubbing her eyes as if to keep awake.

"My name's Roseluck. My friends call me Rose. I-I'm great with flowers and other stuff."

"I'm glad to have you on the team. Now, for my funny zebra. Zecora, I presume?"

"Yes princess, that is right, and I guess I'm glad to be here tonight."

"Why do you speak in rhyme, Zecora?"

"I don't know, I just do. Tell me Celestia, does it bother you?"

"Not at all, Zecora, thank you. What about you, down there at the end?" Celestia was now looking at the derped pony at the end of the long table. The moon was right above her, fully painting her in it's light. She looked more like royalty that the princess, who was on the opposite end of the table and had the least light.

"I like muffins."

"That's wonderful! What's your name?"

"It's Derpy Hooves... I think."

"Don't hurt yourself dear."

"When are we gonna eat?"

"We can eat right now, miss Derpy. I just have to call the chef who is probably asleep right now..."

"No need, Princess." Vinyl interrupted. "I can make some grub. I'm great at cooking."

"If you insist." Princess Celestia said, not really caring.

"I can also cook." Cloudchaser said, "just show us to the kitchen and we'll all eat."

After 23 minutes, Vinyl and Cloudchaser had tossed a salad, baked muffins, and cooked a macaroni pie and a double chocolate cake.  Everypony drooled at the sight, even the princess. It took them about 8 minutes to eat if you didn't count the funny conversations they had.

"So then she said, 'Oatmeal? Are you crazy?" Everypony laughed at the ending of Vinyl's story about her friend Pinkie, except the princess. The mentioning of Pinkie Pie only made the princess want to kill Twilight harder.

"Oh, Pinkie Pie," Zecora started after catching her breath, "she's quite funny. Shouldn't she be the element of laughter, not me?"

Celestia got angrier.

"Kinda reminds me of the time when," everypony's heads turned over to Cloudchaser as she began her story, "all the pegasi had to make this huge tornado to bring up water to Cloudsdale. We were in the tornado, right? And I was flying as fast as I could. Suddenly, Flitter flies over to me and says, 'Isn't that Spitfire down there? Why the hell isn't she up here?'"

Celestia knew Twilight helped with calculating the wing power for that very tornado. She now wanted to eat Twilight's face off.

After the dinner was over, Celestia brought all the ponies out side and told them what to do.

"Use the elements of harmony to stop Discord! I have faith in you girls! Good luck."

All the ponies looked at each other and sighed then finally walked away except for Derpy. Derpy walked backwards, then walked to her side, spun in a circle, then floated away. Upside down. This made Celestia tear up. She walked back inside the castle and she knew she was doomed. She buried her face into her hooves and sobbed. A door opened behind her.

It was Luna. She was very angry with Celestia. Luna walked over to Celestia in her time of weakness and took full advantage.

"Bitch." Luna huffed as she used her magic to slam a stool at her older sister.

Celestia lay on the ground without the energy to retaliate. Luna stood there and kicked her around a bit, then walked away.

"We'll be back." She warned as she left.