I Worry About You, Pinkie.
Author's Note
The amount of me regretting writing this is at zero.
I, kittyhasnosoul, regret nothing.
Oh Dear..
Rarity walked down the street, happily humming to herself.
It had been a few days since she had gotten any exercise, so she had decided that it would be nice to have a little walk before the Boutique opened.
Rarity had gotten distracted when what appeared to be a bush caught her eye. “Hmm?” she peered forward, trying to get a better glance at the sexy green pile of leaves. Suddenly, a pink pony jumped out of the pile. “Surprised! Happy birthday, Rarity!” Pinkie shouted with a blue and yellow party hat atop her head.
Rarity looked at her friend with a confused expression, “Pinkie, dear, it isn’t my birthday and won’t be for nearly four years. My birthday was last month, remember?”
The pink pony frowned a bit, “Oh.” She looked down at the ground for a moment, then bounced back up and shouted, “Birthday or not, it’s always a good day for a party!”
The unicorn rolled her eyes, “Darling, I would love to attend another one of your parties, but I simply must get back to the Boutique in time to finish an order for a very important pony!”
Pinkie Pie frowned again. “I’m not important?” A single tear dropped from her eye. Rarity was soaking wet.
Rarity’s pupils shrunk and eyes went wide when she realized that being the way she is, Pinkie might have taken her sentence the wrong way. “Oh, no no no!” She gave Pinkie a nuzzle, “You are one of my best friends. You are very important, dear. You make me throb internally."
Pinkie Pie’s expression brightened up. “Okay, I’m good now!” She smiled with great pride. “Hey, do you have enough time to stop by Sugarcube Corner before Carousel Boutique opens?” Pinkie asked, eyes wide with curiosity.
Rarity tapped a hoof to her chin, deep in thought. “Well, I guess it couldn’t hurt to open a little late.." Orgies are always fun.
***
Pinkie Pie was grinning the whole way to Sugarcube Corner.
“What did you want to show me, Pinkie?” Rarity asked as they entered the bakery.
“Weeeell...” Pinkie Pie pointed a hoof to the stairs leading up to her room, “I wanted to show you my latest obsession!”
Together the two walked up the stairs into Pinkie Pie’s bedroom, and when they reached the top of the stairs Pinkie Pie informed Rarity to close her eyes.
Pinkie Pie led Rarity right next to her closet and opened the door, “You can open your eyes now!”
“Wha…?” Was the only sound that Rarity could make when she saw what Pinkie Pie had brought her there to show her.
“Like it?”
Pinkie Pie had seemed to build a shrine, on the walls there were pictures of a pony with curly dark brown hair and sticky notes with quotes were attached to the walls.
“She’s my latest obsession! Her name is Bookplayer and she’s a fiction writer.” Pinkie Pie frantically waved her hooves in the air.
“B-bookplayer?” Rarity asked with a confused expression, “I’ve never heard of such pony..”
Pinkie Pie gasped. “Whaaaat? You’ve never heard of the best pony in history of ponies?!”
She then grabbed a book off of the pile of books placed on a small desk, “This is her first book that she wrote! It’s my personal favorite,” she set it down and then grabbed a picture of the curly haired pony and a stallion nuzzling. “OldBook is my OTP!” Pinkie Pie grinned and Rarity chuckled nervously.
“O-otp?” She asked, getting a bit creeped out by Pinkie’s wide grin.
“One True Pairing! All shippers have one,”
Rarity was now as confused as a pony could possibly be. Her gigantic hunker was soggy.
“I think that I’ll be leaving now..” Rarity turned towards the door to leave, but stopped when she heard a high-pitch whine come from the pony behind her. “Why do you have to leave right now?”
Rarity bit her lip nervously and tried to fake the best smile she could, "I.. uh.. need to get to the boutique," with that, she galloped out of Pinkie Pie's bedroom and made sure to say hello to Mrs. and Mr. Cake on her way out.
***
"Darlings, I think that we may have a problem with our friend Pinkie Pie."
The other four ponies looked at Rarity with confusion, "Huh?" Rainbow Dash said, raising an eyebrow.
Rarity had told her four friends, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Twilight, and Fluttershy to come to the boutique after the it had closed to discuss Pinkie Pie's behavior.
"Today I ran into Pinkie Pie, and she told me about this pony that she had what she described as an 'obsession' with. She started using these, strange terms. Such as 'shipping'." Rarity shook her head, "Wherever did she learn these terms?"
Rainbow Dash smiled, "Bookplayer? Yeah, Pinkie Pie told me about her. She sounds awesome!"
Twilight shook her head in agreement, "I have to agree, she does sound like a nice writer."
The unicorns pupils shrunk, "W-what?"
Twilight smiled, "I read a book all about shipping. It sounds pretty neat!" She levitated a book and began to read aloud, "Shipping; pairing two (or more) characters together from a TV show, book series, or movie."
Rarity huffed, "It should not be considered okay for someone to just try to force a couple together!"
Fluttershy raised a hoof, "Well.. uhm.. what about all of those romance novels that I've seen on the bookshelves in your house? Those are like shipping, right?"
"Fluttershy, darling, those pairings choose to be together." She turned towards Twilight, "May I ask why it is called 'shipping'?"
"It's short for 'relationshipping'," Twilight explained. "According to my book, at least."
Rarity put a hoof to her forehead, “I don’t understand.” She sighed, collapsing onto her fainting couch. Also where she spurred the cream that she wish Pinkie would swallow.
“Maybe you should try readin’ one of ‘er stories,” Applejack suggested. “I have to agree with Twi ‘n Dash, they’re pretty darn good stories.”
Twilight grinned, “And I have a copy that I borrowed from Pinkie. You could borrow it for a little while if you’d like,” her magic lit up and teleported a book from her kitchen table over to Rarity’s boutique.
Rarity looked at the cover of the book and sighed, “I guess I will give it a try.” She raised her muzzle into the air, “But don’t expect me to go around ‘shipping’ ponies after I do so!”
After the mane six left, Rarity walked up to her room with the book in her magical grasp.
She sat on her bed and opened the book, and began to read.
***
“...Is this real life?” Rarity said out loud, closing the book on the last page.
She stared at the book for a moment, reading the title over and over again.
“I don’t remember ever reading something so…”
Her train of thought was interrupted when the door to her room burst open.
“Hi Rarity!” Sweetie Belle grinned, “I made you breakfast in bed!” She said with a tray in her mouth.
Rarity’s eye twitched, “B-but… it’s dinner time, Sweetie.”
“No it isn’t,” the filly pointed to the clock on the wall. “It’s 7:15, breakfast time!”
Her eyes widened, “Oh dear ...How long was I reading this book for?”
“What book?” Sweetie Belle set down the tray onto the ground and walked over to Rarity’s bed, peering over to see the book cover. “Looks interesting. Who’s the author?”
Rarity didn’t respond, instead she jumped out of bed and ran out the door.
“But… you forgot your breakfast?” Sweetie Belle let out a sigh. Her super big sausage would have to live.
***
"I don't understand," Rarity said as she sighed and took a sip of her tea.
"What is there not to get?" Twilight asked, sitting down at the table across from Rarity. "She's a good author, is that really that complicated to understand?"
"No," she took another sip of her tea. "I mean, why have I never heard of her before?" She let out a sigh.
"Well, Pinkie's obsession is pretty much brand-new. She just found out about her last week."
"K."
