At the End of Your Rope

by kudzuhaiku

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Original Character, Tragedy
Length: 2268

What do you do when you reach the end of your rope? For some ponies, the end of the rope is the end.

This is a prequel to Princess Luna's Suicide Solutions.

It explains the backstory of Quercus Alba, a unicorn who was down on her luck, and how she came into custody of Shady Patch, a zebra foal. Both characters are yet to be introduced into Princess Luna's Suicide Solutions.

Warning: this story deals with a graphic depiction of suicide. You have been warned. While this can be read as a stand alone story, it is meant to go with Princess Luna's Suicide Solutions.

Published 2014-05-20 03:40:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-20 03:40:04 UTC

A long drop and a sudden stop

The desert was hot and dry. The sun was punishing, unforgiving, and even cruel. One pony and two zebras took refuge inside of a small apartment, waiting out the heat of the day, the apartment part of a duplex made out of the thick adobe that was so common for construction in these parts.

The zebras were refugees from the northern Sea of Grass, which had fallen under the murderous claws of the rampaging griffons, and they had come to Equestria seeking peaceful refuge. Of the two zebras, there had once been three, but now there was only two. Such was the cost of their escape.

The pony was a unicorn, and she was kind and good, she had made friends with the zebra mare when they had met in Horseshoe Bay, when the zebra mare had taken the first few confused steps off of the boat.

She had been on the docks, looking for some kind of work. Times were hard and jobs were scarce. The flood of immigrants meant that many jobs had been filled. It was difficult to find work of any kind.

The two had quickly become fast friends, who took to looking after one another, and the kindly unicorn had become quite close with the zebra foal as well.

The unicorn had the odd name Quercus Alba, meaning white oak. Her father was a biologist and her mother was a botanist. In spite of both of them being very scientific sorts, they acknowledged that they had named their daughter more for the symbolism of the tree, which was a symbol of virtue and hope. She was pearlescent white, with a dark forest green mane and tail. Her eyes were grey, and, even in these troubled times, were full of laughter.

The zebra was named Rill Runner, or simply Rill, and she was beautiful. Her stripes were dark blue-grey and white, rather than the more common black and white. She had passed this trait on to her foal, who was named Shady Patch.

The two of them had come out to the desert, moving west from Horseshoe Bay, looking for work. And for a time, they both had found some. Menial manual labour, but it had been work, hauling gravel from a quarry to restore the main road running through town, the road that would eventually take one to Las Pegasus.

But the work had dried up, like it had in so many places, and they were now living on what little bit of money they had saved. Rent was due in a few weeks when the new month started. The cupboards were mostly bare, and there wasn’t much of anything left. They had discussed the prospects of moving to Las Pegasus, but both of them knew all too well the sort of work for mares that would await them there, and the desperation that would drive them to it. Neither of them wanted to do that.

Quercus was almost desperate enough to write to her parents and beg for help. Pride prevented this though, and pride was all she had left.

“But I don’t wanna go to school tomorrow, too gosh awful hot outside,” Shady Patch complained to his mother.

“Too bad,” Rill Runner replied despondently.

The zebra foal glared at his mother defiantly, and then ran away into the bedroom, the only bedroom, and slammed the door.

“I don’t know what to do with him Quirky,” Rill said, sighing heavily.

“He’s young. And it is hot outside. He’s bound to complain. He’ll be fine though, the walk is short. The morning walk isn’t too bad, but the walk home just past the noon hour is a bit harsh,” Quercus replied.

“I don’t know what we are going to do Quirky, I think we’re over a barrel,” Rill confessed. “There is no work. I don’t want to go to Las Pegasus. I know what awaits us there,” she added, looking glum.

“I’ve started filling out applications for jobs in other towns and mailing them off. Something will work out,” Quercus replied, ever the optimist.

“I wish I believed that. Things might work out for you, but I am a zebra. Every day I get accused of stealing somepony’s job or ruining Equestria and I don’t think I can deal with all of this rejection anymore,” Rill admitted, looking at her friend with wide now watering eyes.

“Aw, come on Silly Rilly, I promise, I’ll see us both through this,” Quercus promised, offering a half-hearted smile to her friend.

“I hate when you call me that,” the zebra griped. “And I can’t spend the rest of my life leeching off of you,” she added.

“But you are my only friend. I will carry you as far as I need to go until we find a place that both of us can get on our hooves together,” Quercus vowed.

“What if I needed you to look after Shady Patch? Would you? If something ever happened to me, would you look after him?” Rill asked, her eyes still wide and teary. Her ears were perked forward and the look on her face was one of intense concern, her bottom lip quivering with worry.

“Of course I would,” Quercus replied nervously, feeling troubled from seeing her friend in such turmoil. “I love him like he is my own, you know that,” the unicorn admitted, hoping to comfort her friend.

“I needed to hear that, thanks. I- I worry sometimes. His father died buying us time to escape. It is a reasonable fear I suppose. I can’t seem to shake what’s happened, and I want Shady Patch looked after,” Rill said, her voice trembling.

Quercus nodded.

“He adores you, you know that right?’ Rill asked.

“I know he does,” Quercus replied.

“I get so angry and hurt when ponies are cruel to him. He hasn’t stolen anypony’s job. He’s just a foal. I don’t know how much more I can take,” Rill mumbled, now crying completely.

“I know, let it all out,” Quercus said, hugging her friend and pulling her closer on the couch they were sharing. It was ratty and worn, and it had come with the apartment when they had rented it.

The zebra sobbed on her only friend's shoulder, her forelegs wrapped around Quercus’ neck. Quercus stroked her friend’s withers, trying to comfort the crying zebra. The bedroom door opened and a pair of eyes watched the crying mares, also filling up with tears as well.

The noonday sun was hot. Quercus moved slowly in the heat, hot gravel road beneath her hooves. She was sweating, but it evaporated almost instantly in the heat. She needed to get home and get indoors, away from the horrible desert sun.

She was ecstatic.

In her saddlebag was a letter stating that she had a job. A good job with excellent pay, pulling a library wagon in a town called Mustang Springs. The job also came with a home provided by the city. It was everything she could have hoped for.

Pulling a wagon full of books was easy compared to what she had been doing. She only had to work in the early mornings and late evenings, going to different parts of the town during different days of the week. Plus, a promotion meant getting a job inside of the library, which sounded ideal to Quercus.

Sure, her cutie mark was five small fire wisps, and she was a registered pyromantic unicorn, but there wasn’t much work for firestarters. She couldn’t put fires out, she could only start them. Cutie marks weren’t everything though, and she would gladly spend the rest of her life working in a library.

Nopony would ever return a book late to a pyromantic librarian she thought to herself, giggling slightly as she headed home.

After a long walk through the blistering sun that made her skin sting, she was finally home. She stood outside her front door, took a deep breath, and then pushed open the door, ready to share the good news.

“Silly Rilly, our troubles are over! I have a job! A good job and it comes with a house! We’ll have to move, but that shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll be getting paid enough that all three of us will be very comfortable!” Quercus announced, her voice a shout.

There was no reply.

Even asleep, Rill Runner should have heard her and woke up.

Confused and slightly worried, Quercus walked though the apartment, her hooves clicking faintly on the tile floor, the cool air indoors soothing on her skin. She peered into the bedroom, and saw the beds were all empty. The bathroom was zebra free. The small kitchen was empty.

There was no zebra to be found.

Quercus pushed open the back door and looked outside into the patch of sand that made up the back yard, and, as she pushed open the door, her heart lept up into her throat.

Hanging from a half dead tree was Rill Runner, a noose around her neck. Not far from her on the ground was a kicked over trash can. Rill hung, her tongue hanging out, her eyes still wide open, an expression of pain and fear still visible. Her bowels and her bladder had given way at the moment of her death, leaving her in a terribly undignified state.

Quercus slowly came to the painful realisation that her best friend, her only friend, was now gone forever. It was a devastating realisation, and she felt her heart break. It was a break she feared would never heal.

Behind her, she heard hooves clicking on the tile. She backed inside and quickly slammed the back door.

Whirling, she saw Shady Patch and their next door neighbor, the pony who rented the apartment that made up the other half of the duplex. The neighbor had helpfully walked both her foal and Shady Patch home from school.

“Go get help,” Quercus said, her voice wavering, nearly breaking. “I’ll look after the foals. There has been… there has been an accident with Rill in the backyard. Don’t go back there and look,” Quercus explained.

Shady Patch began to cry and wanted to see his mother. Quercus was unable to allow it, and she felt something in her insides rip when she told him no. She sat down and hugged the foal close, now sobbing, clinging tightly to the only thing she had left of her best friend. The two of them cried to together, the other foal watching, not comprehending, but also starting to cry as well.

Needlewood, the neighbor, slowly turned around and left to get help. Her foal, Roadrunner, fell into Quercus’ embrace, confused, not knowing what was going on, but needing comfort.

Epilogue

“So you get to keep me?” Shady Patch asked.

“Yes love, nopony is disputing Rill’s final wishes she left behind in her note,” Quercus replied.

“We have to go? I am going to miss Roadrunner,” Shady said, his head drooping down low.

“Yes love, we have to go, I have a job waiting for me in Mustang Springs. I can provide for you there, and we can try to heal from this together,” Quercus answered.

“I don’t understand why she did it,” Shady whimpered.

“I don’t either love, her note didn’t make that clear, but I know that she was in pain. I just wish I knew how much pain. I feel like I let her down. I feel like I should’ve seen this coming,” Quercus confessed.

“Quirky, you are my mom’s bestest friend. She loves you. You did all you could do,” Shady said, his words starting to trail into sobs.

Quercus couldn’t help but notice the foal’s use of present tense. She wondered if the finality of everything had sunk in yet.

The two huddled together, clinging to one another, seeking comfort from each other.

“Are you my mom now?” Shady asked.

“Do you want me to be, love?” Quercus answered with her own question.

“Yes Quirky, I need a mommy right now,” Shady said, burying his head into her neck and sobbing.

Quercus could not reply, but she held the foal tightly and hoped for a better future. Mustang Springs awaited.

Author's Note

So, a bit of backstory for a soon to be major character in Princess Luna's Suicide Solutions.

I suspect that this is going to cause quite a stink, much like PLSS did. Please, try to be respectful. This is a story about suicide. You were warned. Please do not go downvoting because you found this story offensive or it made you unhappy. You were warned. You clicked the link. You bought the ticket, you took the ride, you have no one to blame but yourself.

I encourage polite and civil discussion below in the comments. Failure to be civil and reasonable and I will delete whatever I feel is crossing a line. I'm not in a mood to watch people hurting one another or being jackanapes to one another because of a story. I want people to feel safe talking about suicide, and the issues it raises. So please, again I ask, show some respect. Be civil. Be kind. Be gentle to one another.

Thank you in advance, I only did this because some of you, you know who you are, restored some of my faith in this community. So thank you, this story is dedicated to you.

If I made any mistakes, let me know. I've been awake too long, so the help is appreciated. Thank you.