The Holder Of Faggotry

by IvanTheTrader

Rating: everyone
Tags: Adventure, Random, Crossover, Comedy
Length: 631

In any asylum or mental institution in any town of any country you can find something that will change your life forever...

In any asylum or mental institution in any town of any country you can find something that will change your life forever…

(Crossover/Satire/parody of the holder series)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-21 23:59:50 UTC

TEH RITUAL

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask with no hesitation to visit someone who calls himself the holder of faggotry.

The receptionist should be watching an episode of season one of My Little Pony, Friendship is magic. If it is any othe show or not an episode of season one then turn around and leave imediatly, dont stop for anything other than basic bodily functions. Leave the country as soon as possible for only the borders will protect you from the hellspawn that will emerge to end your existance in the most horrendous ways immangiable. If They turn the screen around to show you, you are already doomed, for what you see on the screen can drive even the strongest willed man  or women to the darkest reaches of insanity.

Should they hold up their finger in an attempt to pause you until the episode is over grab their hand without hesitation and slam it down upon the desk and ask with anger in your voice to visit the holder of faggotry again. The receptionist should look at you in fear, if he shows any other emotion then run. Never stop moving. For he will hunt you to the corners of the earth to end your life in a manner that will earn you the pity of the souls in the darkest regions of hell.

When he looks at you in fear he will get up and without a word begin walking. DO NOT FOLLOW HIM. Where he goes you will become lost and spend eternity wandering stone corridors trying to find your way home. In approximatly five minutes, no more no less, he will return. If he does not return you will be trapped in the lobby for all of time and then some.

When he returns he will give you a key with Twilight Sparkles cuti mark engraved upon it. If it has any other ponies cuti mark then that pony will appear behind you and rape you with a cactus for exactly six hundred and sixty six years. If it is Derpy's she will do the same but instead use a baseball bat with exactly seven hundred and ten spikes for four hundred and twenty years, after those years of brutal anal ahnialation you will black out and awaken outside the lobby. You will be freeto leave and may try again at any time.

If it is Twilight Sparkle's cutie mark you should take the key and will be escorted to the basement. Upon reaching the basement door the receptionist should skip away singing "Winter wrap up." If he sings any other song all is lost the door will not open and you must leave and try again on April fourth of the following year. If he doesn''t skip away prepare your anus for the pounding of its life and then an untimly, and horiffic death.

Use the key to unlock the door and brace yourself for what you will find. Lineing the walls will be your favorite ponies and OCs in metal cages. The will be sick, covered in blisters and being raped by obese neckbeards who reek of cheetos and dried semen. They will call out to you to be saved, but you must continue on and ignore them, lest you take their place on the wall.

After walking through this average brony convention for about two hours you should come accross a door. If you dont after two hours turn around, for you cannot find the door in your lifetime. Never come back and abandon yourt questm for all the objects you have found will be used to sexually violate you in unimaginable ways,