One Last Shot

by doctor dapples

Rating: everyone
Tags: Romance
Length: 5783

The story of how an uptight Manehattanite allowed a carefree islander to infiltrate his life. (M/M, Caesar x OC)

Ever since the Gala, Caesar's life has been one disappointment after another. But a random act of sympathy to a young stallion may finally snap him out of his rut.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-27 07:24:42 UTC

Enter Coconut

Years ago, he used to wake up to the sound of her voice: sweet and soft, gently prodding him out of his slumber. In recent weeks, that custom had returned, but it was always preceded by the harsh ringing of the telephone. He had to reach across her side of the bed, across that cold expanse, to hear her voice, which seemed to become more bitter and accusing every morning. He was usually too tired to fully understand what she was upset about, and his slowness to respond just irritated her further. "What is it this time, Lyrica?"

"Don't give me that, Caesar. I don't know how you think I'm supposed to get all my things if you aren't willing to work with me."

Caesar covered the receiver with his hoof and yawned. "Just come over and get it. It doesn't matter when."

In a contemporary mansion on the other side of town, a lilac pony scoffed. "Of course it matters. This is exactly what is wrong with you. You can't make any decisions for yourself. Take someone like Herald..."

"Uggghhhhh..." he groaned, and slammed down the receiver. He flopped back down on the bed and ran his hooves through his gray mane. Caesar had always viewed his silver locks as a look of distinction, that gave him an appearance of dignified seniority. Now it just made him feel old. Herald was only a little bit younger than him, but he had a curly mane of brown cream, a deep rich brown coat that put his to shame. And of course, Herald had Lyrica now.

• • •

The weatherpony had predicting sunny skies for days now, but the second Caesar stepped out of his empty terraced brownstone, it was clear just how far off their predictions were. The winds whipped around his body, and he tugged his top hat further down onto his head. In front of his apartment, busy ponies walked hunched, trying to keep themselves protected from the cold air. A curiously striped pony with a short green mane and a tacky jacket was attempting to pass out fliers to anypony who would take one.

"Come to the Blind Griffin and try Manehattan's newest spirit! A sophisticated taste for the sophisticated customer! Free shot with this flier!" Before Caesar had the chance to refuse, the jacketed pony had shoved a piece of paper into his hoof and that of a blue unicorn, who grumbled in response. "Thank you very much, sirs! I look forward to seeing you there!" He gave them both a big smile.

The blue unicorn gave a nasty smile back as his horn began to glow. The flier crumbled itself into a little ball, and went flying away in the wind. The young pony gaped as the unicorn resumed his walk down the street, but eventually gathered himself enough to yell incredulously, "Are you serious? What is your problem, buddy?" He sighed heavily and looked at Caesar, defeated. "If you don't want it, just give it back to me. Maybe somepony can use it for toilet paper or something." Caesar looked at the sheet in his hand, which promised a combination of sophistication and adventure in the form of a new drink. He flashed back to what Lyrica had said to him about making decisions.

He stuffed the flier under his hat. "Maybe I'll stop by later."

The pony lifted his head to reveal a pair of orange eyes that were practically sparkling with happiness. "Really?" he said with excitement, before quickly coughing and adopting a more serious demeanor. "Um...thank you very much, sir. We look forward to your business."

As Caesar walked away in the direction of his art gallery, he felt the first smile of the morning slowly appear on his face.

Hours later, Caesar pushed in the heavy doors of The Blind Griffin to find himself in a sparsely occupied pub given an old-world style by a wooden interior. He hadn't been to this part of town in years, and he was impressed with how much things had changed since he was younger. When he had gone out with his buddies for a drink, the only places they could get to serve them were sketchy looking dives where it seemed as if all the air had been replaced by smoke. This bar was tastefully decorated, and the pony behind the counter was dressed in a well-pressed striped vest and white shirt. Certainly a step up from the oily ponies who gave him skunky beer in dirty glasses when he was hardly older than a colt.

As he approached the bartender, he recognized the braid in his mane. It was the same pony who had been passing out the fliers, but this time he was dressed to the nines, with his unruly mane swept backwards. His serious demeanor was somewhat belied, however, by the goofy grin that appeared on his face as he recognized Caesar. "Glad that you could make it, sir!"

Caesar plopped himself down on one of the bar stools. "I honestly didn't know the first thing about this place. How long has it been here?"

"Oh, The Blind Griffin has been one of downtown's most popular establishments." When Caesar looked around at the lack of crowd, the bartender was quick to interject. "It's a little early for the real crowds, just yet."

"Ahh," Caesar said. "And have you been here the whole time?"

The young pony shook his head. "Oh no, sir. I'm actually only here for the duration of the promotion. Speaking of which, do you still have that flier?"

Caesar reached up into his hat and unfolded the paper on the bar with his hooves. ONE FREE SHOT, it announced in big, bold letters. "So what's next?" A blue bottle and a shot glass appeared on the bar as if by magic. The older pony adjusted his monocle to look at the label. "Coco Loco...what exactly is this?"

"Well, sir...are you familiar with rum?"

"Of course."

"This is rum, but with extract of coconut."

Caesar raised his brow. "And this is your product?"

"More than my product, sir. Its also my name. Coconut Rum, at your service." The pony made a small bow, which caused some of his mane to fall out of place and into his eyes.

Caesar chuckled at the display. "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Coconut Rum, but I don't know about this. Can I be honest with you?"

"Absolutely, mister...."

"You can just call me Caesar. Honestly, it sounds like a drink for mares." He cringed as Coconut returned a very annoyed glare. "I...I'm sorry, Coconut," he said, sheepishly. "I don't mean to be such a pain in the flank. If its any consolation, I don't really know spit about alcohol. It probably tastes great."

Coconut responded by filling the shot glass and pushing it closer to Caesar. "I don't do probably."

Caesar looked at the shot glass and narrowed his eyes. He nodded with determination, picked it up, and downed the shot. The liquid was cold, and it felt a little thicker than most spirits he had tried, almost a syrup. The first thing that hit him was the sweetness, the tropical flavor of coconut flesh. Then the alcohol hit the back of his throat, and he felt the warmth spread down into his stomach. He sat for a moment, stunned, before talking to Coconut again. "That was delicious."

The green-maned pony smiled. "Give it another moment." And as if he had just given it his permission, the rum began to do its work. Caesar felt the lightness in his head and in his limbs, and the smile on his face grew along with Coconut's. He reached into his coinpurse and pulled out some coins.

"Give me another."

• • •

There was a stereo "clink" as both ponies added another glass to their stack of empties. Coconut had caught up to Caesar's total on the older pony's request, but it was clearly not affecting them in the same way. Coconut seemed just as relaxed as ever, the only change being a loosening of his red bowtie. Caesar, on the other hand was animatedly telling Coconut about his experiences at the last Grand Galloping Gala, and was doing it with grand hoof gestures and sound effects that irked some of the more sensitive patrons of the establishment.

"...so next thing I know I'm FLYING IN THE AIR and I land on the back of this pegasus who ended up destroying THE WHOLE CASTLE. I mean BOOM! BOOM! I swear, I'm almost positive that she was the one who knocked me into the air IN THE FIRST PLACE I MEAN WHO DOES THAT??" Caesar ended his story with a grand shrugging gesture, looking to Coconut Rum as if he could answer the question.

Coconut laughed and held his hoof up to mouth in a "shhhh" gesture, before laughing again and grabbing another glass. "Don't forget we're not the only ones here." He poured himself another shot. "So what did Lyrica say about the whole affair?"

"Ugh, somehow in spite of those other ponies ruining the palace, my little flight managed to be the embarrassing moment of her night."

"With all due respect to your wife, Caesar, she sounds like a real witch."

"Well, you know how mares are."

Coconut's orange eyes darted around the room. He made a face, then said a little quieter. "Not really."

"What? Are you telling me you've never been with a mare, Coconut??"

Frantically, Coconut raised his hooves in front of Caesar. "Keep it down, please. That's not what I mean at all. It's just that I'm..."

Suddenly it clicked in Caesar's mind. "Ohhhhhhh..."

"Yeah."

"Well..." Caesar paused. "There was a time in my life where I might actually have something to say about that. But nowadays I'm thinking live and let live. I guess I'm becoming a softie in my old age."

"You still seem pretty young to me."

He laughed scornfully and grabbed Coconut's shot. "You got that right, brother."

Coconut cocked his head to the side. "I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"Its good you're not me, then!" Caesar said as he knocked it back. As Coconut rolled his eyes, Caesar searched for a clever retort to put the younger pony in his place. After all, he was the one whoooooooo-

Coconut put his hooves out in time to catch Caesar's head before it slammed into the table. He lowered it to the surface of the bar, and turned his head to the side. "You're right. Its definitely good I'm not you." Coconut put the empties in the basin, and signaled the other bartender. "You got it from here?"

• • •

The first thing that went through Caesar's mind when he came to was "when did this barstool get so comfortable?" The answer became obvious when he found himself not on a wooden stool in The Blind Griffin, but on a sofa in somepony's studio apartment. "Hello?" he called out, still very much feeling the effects of the liquor.

A green maned head poked itself out from another room. "Ah! You're back in our dimension! Glad to see you!" Coconut Rum had taken off his vest and tie, but still had on his white dress shirt. His braid was still in, but his mane was thoroughly mussed. Caesar had to admit that he was a very handsome pony.

"Am I at your apartment?"

"Yep! We're right over the bar, actually."

Caesar scratched the back of his head. "Why didn't you just call a carriage for me?"

Coconut chuckled to himself. "Well, first of all, I couldn't pry the address out of you. You just kept saying you didn't want to go to that empty tomb. THEN you started talking about Lyrica and next thing I know you're swearing up a storm in front of the carriage driver." Caesar blushed. "I wasn't about to put him through that. Besides, my shift was pretty much over anyway."

"I'm really sorry about that, Coconut."

The younger pony shook his head. "It's not a big deal." He grabbed an orange bottle off of the shelf and took a quick drink. "You get used to it after a while. Didn't Lyrica ever warn you about going to a fillyfooler's apartment?"

"She thinks you're all predators," he said laughing nervously. He continued to find himself looking at Coconut. What is going on, he thought. Is it the mane? Is it the stripes? Or is this all from the rum? He distracted himself from these thoughts by looking at the bottle. "What is that?"

Coconut looked at the bottle and laughed. "That stuff you were drinking down there is my father's brand." He tapped the label with his hoof. On it was a badly drawn caricature of Coconut. "This is mine."

"Your father? Who is he? If he runs in any of the fashionable circles..."

"He's not from here. We're from San Caballo. I'm actually due back there tomorrow."

Caesar looked around the room, noticing for the first time that everything seemed to be packed up in boxes. "So what's the purpose in you coming here?" he asked, puzzled.

"Dad says its so I can build experience as a bartender, but I've been doing it for years back home without any problems. He really just wants me to talk up our rum so that sophisticated ponies in the city start buying it." He scoffed. "Fat chance."

"Hey!" Caesar yelled. He felt genuinely upset that anypony would do something to hurt his new friend. Wait, is Coconut my friend now? "Your rum is great! Why wouldn't these ponies buy it?"

Coconut smiled and looked over at Caesar with a sly expression. "Because it sounds like a drink for mares." Caesar sank further into the sofa, but was quickly joined by Coconut. "Seriously, don't feel bad. You're the only one who has given it any kind of chance, and for that I'm completely grateful."

Caesar felt a dopey smile spread on his face and suddenly he felt a warmth inside of him that he had almost forgotten about. He was just sitting down and talking to this other pony, but inside his brain he was dancing. It thrilled him to be so close to Coconut for some reason, and yet he found himself wanting to get even closer. He nodded his head in the direction of the orange bottle. "So, can I try some?"

The younger pony furrowed his brow and stood up. "I don't know if that's a good idea. This is a lot stronger than what we were drinking in the bar, and I can read a pony's tolerance pretty well. If I give you another shot of this stuff, you won't be in control of your senses anymore." He paced around the room in a little circle and then turned around to face Caesar again. "Look, I know we've just met, but I like you a lot. But I don't want you to do anything that you're going to regret."

Caesar looked into the pony's orange eyes. "You're the expert. What if I don't do a full shot?"

Coconut gulped. "Well...I honestly believe you'd still be in control of your actions."

"That sounds fair to me."

He looked at the bottle. "So you really want this?"

Caesar looked at Coconut. "Yes, I do."

Flashing a devilish smile, Coconut took a small drink from his bottle and put it to the side. He approached Caesar from the front, and climbed into his lap, straddling his quarters. He put his hoof under Caesar's chin and tilted it up to meet his. They met in a close-mouthed kiss, and the older pony felt his body shiver as Coconut allowed the rum made warm in his mouth to spill into Caesar's. He swallowed it down and pushed his muzzle into Coconut's with greater passion.

Coconut tilted his head back and exhaled with satisfaction, eyes closed. Caesar unbuttoned another button on his dress shirt, exposing more of the stripes on the pony's chest. He kissed the middle of one of the stripes, illiciting a sharp gasp from Coconut, who looked down with a smile.

Caesar looked up warily. "Should I stop?"

Coconut shook his head, already a little out of breath. "Don't you dare."

• • •

The next evening, after spending the day packing, Caesar finally plugged his telephone back in. Immediately, the ringer went off, causing the pony to jump back with a start. He picked up the phone and answered with "You just don't quit, do you?"

"Where have you been? I've been trying to reach you all day!" came Lyrica's voice, angrier than usual.

"What a coincidence," Caesar said, laughing. "I've been avoiding you all day. So what's going on, sweetie?"

"Don't 'sweetie' me! Herald went by our apartment today to pick up the rest of my things and he said that he banged and banged on the door and that you didn't answer!"

"Well, maybe I wasn't there."

"He said you were singing!"

Caesar thought back. "Yeah, I probably was. Anyway, I already put your stuff out for him."

"What? Well, where is it now?"

"Well, it was in the dumpster out in the alley," Caesar paused as he heard the gasp at the other end. "...but that was a can of lighter fluid and a match ago, so there's no telling what it looks like now."

"YOU WHAT??"

"Anyway, I'd love to talk, but I have a balloon to catch. Give my regards to Gerald."

"ITS HERALD AND YOU KN-"

"See ya later!" And Caesar yanked the phone cord out of the wall.

• • •

Caesar was already in the carriage on his way to the balloon station when the adrenaline finally eased off. He shook his head and exhaled a massive breath. "I can't believe I just did that," he laughed. He reached into his pocket and looked at his ticket. San Caballo. "On the other hand, I can't believe a lot of the things I do lately." He smiled, closed his eyes, and licked his lips, still sweet from the night before.

First Impressions

The green-haired colt eyed the invitation. What had caught his attention was the fancy hoofwriting, obviously the work of a skilled calligraphist, followed by the shiny golden border. But what impressed Coconut Rum the most was the weight of the invitation, clearly made of a much fancier paper stock than the fliers that he used for his promotions at The Blind Griffin.

        “I don’t know about this,” the half-zebra called out to the older pony in another room. Coconut had worried about this long before his current stay with Caesar. It was, in fact, the only reason he had hesitated on this visit to Manehattan. As much as he loved Caesar’s company, their backgrounds could not be more different, and spending an evening at a formal attended by the sort of ponies who made up the city pony’s inner circle? That was biting off a bit more than he was sure he could chew.

        “It will be fine, Coconut! It’s just a simple party!” insisted Caesar, going through the contents of his desk. He knew he had it somewhere...

        “Simple parties don’t have golden invitations!”

        “It’s just the border, and its only gold leaf!”

        Coconut sighed, and asked in an exasperated voice, “...which is made of?”

        There was a momentary silence before Caesar answered. “Okay, so it’s made of gold. But you’ll do great.”

        “What exactly am I supposed to wear to this, anyway?” Coconut flung the invitation behind himself in a nervous gesture. “The most formal thing I’ve ever worn was my uniform for work, and I don’t need your friends thinking I’m a waiter.”

        Caesar chuckled at the thought of his peers asking his coltfriend to refill their punch glasses, all the while rummaging through the stacks of papers that had piled up in the past weeks. Finally, he caught a glimpse of some purple among the chaos of white and yellow, and fished it out with his hoof. “It’s already taken care of, babe.”

        He came out of his study with the purple ticket clenched between his teeth, and offered it to Coconut. The younger pony looked at the ticket, which featured a stylized portrait of a white-coiffed stallion in large sunglasses. “What’s this about?”

        “I called in a favor with a designer I know. He’s agreed to find you something to wear to the formal from his own collection.”

        “Is this...” Coconut stammered. “Is this Hoity Toity?”

Caesar nodded.

“You know him?”

Another nod.

“Ooh!” As Caesar began to laugh, Coconut looked up from the ticket. “Hey, to me this is pretty impressive. I’ve read about his stuff. He’s good.”

“Well, I’m glad he meets with your approval.” Caesar’s little comment was rewarded with a light smack on the nose with the ticket.

“Hush, you!” Coconut laughed, leaning up against Caesar’s side. He nuzzled his cheek against the older pony’s neck. The gray fur smelled of juniper, a combination of pine and citrus that now made Coconut’s flesh tingle. “Thank you for this.”

Caesar smiled and sighed, enjoying the feel of Coconut’s hot breath. “I should be thanking you. Everypony at that benefit is going to be jealous of me tonight.” The comment elicited a giggle, which was followed by an unexpected nip at his ear. Caesar felt his face flush as Coconut’s warm tongue traced the contours of his jawline. He swallowed hard. “I dunno if we...” he tried to spit out through increasingly shallow breaths. “We’re going to be-”

The words were lost in the kiss, and for a moment, feeling Coconut’s nose against his own and breathing in that omnipresent tropical taste, Caesar couldn’t remember what he was saying mere seconds before. Eventually, his thoughts returned and he reluctantly broke the kiss. “Coconut, we don’t have time for this. We’re going to be late!” he said nervously, hoping the green-maned pony wouldn’t take his need for punctuality as a rejection.

Instead, Coconut just smiled, his orange eyes half-open and glistening with a soft expression. “I would think a socialite like you would be familiar with the term ‘fashionably late’?” He ran his hoof through his lover’s silver mane and resumed the kiss.

Hoity could wait a little bit.

“Sorry we’re late, Hoity. The traffic out there is terrible,” Caesar lied. “I hope we don’t have any problems getting there tonight.” His words echoed in the vast studio, empty of life except for the lone pony, whose image was recognizable to any Equestrian with a passing knowledge of fashion.

“If there’s one thing I’ve tried painfully to impart upon you, Caesar, it is not when you show up, but how. And once again, I seem to be disappointed.” The silver-coated designer looked with dismay around the studio. “How am I supposed to dress this... squeeze of yours, if he’s nowhere to be found?”

“Coming!” came Coconut’s response as he rushed in through the door. “The carriage driver was giving me a hard time about his tip, but I told him where he could put it.” Upon seeing the well-dressed designer, he walked up and extended his hoof. “I’m Coconut Rum. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Toity.”

The introduction elicited a sly smile from its recipient, who returned the hoofshake. “The pleasure is all mine, Coconut. And you can call me Hoity.” When Coconut beamed back a big smile, Hoity looked past him to Caesar. “When exactly did you develop such great taste?”

Caesar shot him back a sheepish grin. He felt proud that an old stallion like himself could still capture the attention of a colt who met Hoity’s rigorous standards for looks. He subconsciously rubbed at a part of his neck where he was sure Coconut had left a mark from a love bite, thankfully covered up by his fur. “So what’s next, Hoity? Do I need to give you my ideas, or-”

Hoity immediately held up both hooves in a defensive gesture. “No, sir. Your services will not be necessary for this. All I need is to borrow this gorgeous colt for a moment so I can get him fitted in something that will put the rest of that crowd to shame.” He glanced over at Coconut, who was now blushing and looking at Caesar nervously. He looked back to the gray pony. “As for you, my old friend, I have a nice little lounge down the hall. Big red door. Help yourself to a Fillygrino and anything else you find EXCEPT the chocolate-covered barley, which is MINE. Touch it on pain of death.”

As Caesar trotted off towards the lounge, threats of violence still ringing in his ears, Hoity turned to his model. “He’s a great pony, but his idea of what looks good is at least six years behind. I’m not sending you to that formal in a cummerbund.” A quick wave of his hoof signaled for the giggling Coconut to follow him down the hall to one of the fitting rooms.

The first thing the young pony saw was an image of himself, quickly joined by two others as he approached the triptych of mirrors. He wasn’t used to getting such a good look at himself, and he had to admit that he didn’t look half bad. “I always forget how far the stripes go on my back.”

Hoity smirked. “Never forget your stripes. They really work with your shape. I have got to hire more zebras.”

Coconut smiled at the compliment. “So,” he asked tentatively, striking various poses for the mirrors. “Are you interested in my suggestions? Because I was thinking maybe an orange tie would work with my colors.”

“Now that’s actually a reasonable idea, though I was thinking more along the lines of a loose-fitting scarf.” Hoity approached Coconut and began gazing up and down his body with a focused expression, seemingly studying his form.

“That would be even better! I used to wear a bow tie for a job I had here, and that thing came off the second I was out the door. I was just concerned about looking too casual.”

Hoity rubbed his chin with his hoof. “I don’t think you need to worry about that. You’re going to like the way you look. I guarantee it.” Coconut noticed that Hoity’s glasses had slid down his nose, and his eyes were looking upwards, as if lost in thought. His mouth was moving, but he was clearly talking to himself, and aside from quick snatches of numbers or words like “croup” and “withers”, the designer’s thoughts were clearly only meant for him.

Suddenly, a large smile appeared on Hoity’s face, and his violet eyes shone with happiness. “I was thinking about the scarf, but I’ve decided to scrap all of that, and put you in something much bolder.” The designer pony promptly disappeared out of the fitting room, and a nearby door could be heard slamming open.

“Bolder?” Coconut called out, confused and curious.

“MUCH bolder!” yelled Hoity from the next room. “What I had planned would have worked swimmingly for any other pony, but you clearly have something more!”

“Something... more?” The young pony couldn’t help but blush.

“Most certainly! Caesar told me about your mixed lineage, but I’ve seen very few ponies whose patterns complemented themselves so well! And you’re just the right size for an ensemble that requires a wearer with real panache!” There was a short pause, followed by some swearing as the frustrated pony continued his search. Eventually, he struck paydirt. “Aha! There you are!”

Hoity ducked back into the room carrying a black garment bag in his mouth. “You are going to look amazing.” He laid it out in front of Coconut. “Go ahead and open it!”

Grinning from ear to ear in anticipation, Coconut slowly unzipped the bag, only to feel his heart sink as he looked at the contents within. He looked up at the designer with a quizzical look. “You’re joking, right?” he asked, but the gray pony was all business.

“You were made for this outfit. Try it on!”

“No!”

“Look, I know it’s a bit...unconventional.”

“Unconventional, my flank! It’s a dress!”

“It is more than just a dress. It is the sexiest dress I’ve ever made.”

“IT IS STILL A DRESS.” The young pony was starting to get upset. What exactly did Hoity expect from him?

“Look, Coconut.” Hoity wrapped a forehoof around the pony’s withers. “I know this comes as a shock to you. And from your reaction, it’s clear that wearing mares’ clothes is not an experience you’ve partaken in. I respect that. But your body is absolutely perfect for this. You’ll easily be the best looking pony at the formal.”

“But...”

“Just think, Coconut. You walk in the room, and all eyes are on you. Every stallion wants to be with you. Every mare wants to be you.”

Coconut felt his resolve starting to slip. “But...” he was able to squeak out, “I’m not a mare.”

“Just do me one favor before you make up your mind, all right? Let’s see what Caesar has to say first.” The suggestion elicited a smile from Coconut. “If you don’t like his reaction, we’ll get you into something more conventional, n’est-ce pas?”

He hesitated at first, but eventually the young pony nodded his assent. As Hoity disappeared in a blur, Coconut began to nose the slinky garment. “Umm...how do I put this on?”

“You’ll probably need my help with that. Same goes for the jewelry!”

“Jewelry?”

Caesar finished his second Fillygrino and placed the empty next to the first on the cedar coffee table. He considered going back for a third, but wondered if it was worth straining Hoity’s hospitality when he wasn’t so much thirsty as nervous. The calmness he had displayed so far had largely been a façade for Coconut’s sake. He recognized how anxious the young pony was about his first real formal event and wanted him to feel at ease. However, Caesar had plenty to be concerned about himself. For one, this would be the first time he had really stepped out among his own circle with Coconut, the first time anypony would see him with a colt.

And then there was Lyrica. He’d done a very good job distancing himself from his ex-mate, especially since meeting Coconut. There had been a great deal of unpleasantness once he first returned from San Caballo. Luckily her new beau, a curly-maned brown pony named Herald, was not particularly interested in a physical confrontation, especially upon hearing exaggerated descriptions of Caesar’s erratic behavior from Lyrica. But both of them would almost certainly be at the formal, and he both hated and feared the idea of once more being the recipient of that judging stare, now with the word “coltcuddler” being repeated whenever his back was turned.

He opened the refrigerator door to see if there was something stronger than bubbly water. In the back, he could see the box of dark chocolate barley. It was elegantly packaged, except for a big piece of red tape that had NO written in large letters. Maybe just a peek...

“Ahem!” came a noise from behind, causing him to attempt to stand up, banging his head hard on the top of the refrigerator.

Nursing his sore head with a hoof, he turned around to see the two ponies. Coconut was wrapped from head to toe in a white cloak, so that only the brown of his muzzle was visible.

Caesar looked at the shrouded pony with incredulity. “Umm...Hoity? You know I almost always bow to your expertise, but you do know this is a formal banquet, not a cult meeting?”

The designer responded with a well-timed snort. “Save your comments, you fillistine. This is what we in fashion call the dramatic reveal.” He cleared his throat again. “Fillies and gentlecolts, it is my most dubious honor to present to you, an islander making his big social debut in Manehattan, Coconut Rum!” He stepped backwards and made a sweeping gesture with his hooves as Coconut released the cloak, allowing it to flutter to the ground.

The older pony definitely wasn’t sure what he had expected, but it was nothing like what he saw. His jaw dropped.

Coconut was wearing a slinky indigo evening gown that hugged the feminine curves of his body. There was no back to it, allowing a perfect view of the brown stripes that went down to his loin, where the fabric began again. The dress clung to his rump and down his quarters, at which point the fabric became more breezy, and hung loosely down to just over his ankles. On each side, near the beginning of his flank, there was a tiny embroidered daisy. The flowers were also seen lining the collar around Coconut’s neck, and the orange centers perfectly set off the rich citrus of the young pony’s eyes.

Caesar tried desperately to think of something to say, but nothing would come out. Silence dominated the room.

Coconut nervously twitched his ears. They were still a little sore from the piercing, after which Hoity had given him two stones, a rich red in color. He waited for Caesar to speak, but when it became clear the image was a shock, he took the initiative himself. “It wasn’t my idea. Really.”

The pony’s voice shook Caesar out of his trance. “I... I honestly don’t know what to say.”

Coconut lowered his head, suddenly too embarrassed to make eye contact. “I’m sorry. I didn’t even want to. Hoity said that it-”

“You look amazing.”

Coconut looked up. “What?”

“You’re absolutely beautiful.” Caesar walked over to the nervous pony and gave his cheek a soft nuzzle. Coconut returned it with hesitation.

“You mean, you don’t think this looks stupid? You wouldn’t be ashamed to be seen with me?”

Caesar pulled back so that their foreheads were almost touching. He looked deep into Coconut’s eyes. “I could never be ashamed of you.” He leaned in the extra inch and placed a soft kiss on the colt’s lips. As Coconut returned it, both of them felt their anxieties about the evening starting to dissipate. Everything was going to be fine.

After a moment lost in the embrace, they realized that Hoity Toity was still standing next to them, a grin spread from ear to ear. “Don’t stop on my account.”

The two lovers chuckled, and Coconut reached up a hoof to softly stroke Caesar’s muzzle. “Sorry, Hoity. Thanks for all you’ve done for us, but we have places to be tonight.”