I'm in Equestria!?

by Dark_Knight

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Random, Dark, Human, Romance
Length: 4249

Inspired by DJSkywalker's 'I left my world for Ponies?!', basically the same idea as 'human going to Equestria, but will have major differences, such as turning into a pony from the get-go and hijynxs will insue

Logan Wynn lived an ordinary life. Until Discord crashed into his bedroom and whisked him away to Equestria. No more spoilers.

sad

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-06 06:05:07 UTC

To Equestria we go!

Everything was just fine for Logan, the school year just ended, he aced all his classes, and he was finally just about to take a well deserved sleep.

Then the Lord of Chaos crashed into his bedroom.

"Ugh," groaned Discord, "note to self: never openly mock Celestia's big flank when you're right next to an inter-dimensional mirror, but it was totally worth it!"

Logan blinked, rubbed his eyes, then looked again. Sure enough, Discord, the spirit of Chaos and Disharmony, in all his unrivaled, insane glory, possessing various animal body parts, right down to the cloven hoof and lion paw, was sitting in his room.

Of course, being of Celtic descent, Logan didn't care at the time if it was a covenant Elite. If you interrupted his sleep, you're getting his foot up your phanny.

"HEY!" He yelled at the smug Discord "what the heck are you doing in my room?!". Then the realization finally hit him: Discord, a character from the brown - haired boys' favorite show "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic", an ANIMATED SHOW, was in his bedroom.

Discord literally turned back his head without moving his neck upon hearing Logan's demanding for an explanation "Well young man," he replied in his sophisticated, yet manic voice, "I was just minding my own business in the Crystal Empire, looking at my beautiful reflection," as he said this, a vanity mirror appeared in his eagle talon that proceeded to crack upon his looking at it, "but, out of nowhere, Celestia attacks me, demanding that I apologize for saying the truth!"

"And what might that truth be?"

"That her cutie mark has its own orbit. When I said that I wouldn't apologize for saying what was true, she shot me with her magic, which hit the mirror as I dodged the blast, and sent me here."

"And by mirror you mean the portal to the human version of Equestria?"

"Exactly."

Logan thought for a minute ‘This can be my only chance’

"Take me with you."

The draquenequis immediately turned back to the human, with a look of surprise on his face "What did you say?"

"Take me to Equestria with you" Logan repeated.

"Okay, you'll obviously want to bring books on all human science, history, and others of that nature to handle Twilight, you'll also need a pony body, maybe a Pegasus?"

Now it was Logan’s turn to be surprised, "Wait, so you're not even going to protest my joining you?"

"And pass up the perfect opportunity to spread some minor chaos? How you wound me," said the Lord of Chaos dramatically, "besides, I already made a copy of you to stay here as to not arouse any suspicions in the bathroom."

The teenage boy grinned "Thank you kindly, Discord." he then proceeded to bow.

Discord grinned in turn, then snapped his fingers, opening a portal, "Shall we?"

"Why, don't mind if I do," replied Logan as he stepped through the portal, beginning a new chapter in his life.

                                                                           ***

It's a beautiful day in Ponyville, and Rainbow Dash, the fastest flier in all of Equestria, is doing what she does best: sleeping on her personal cloud.

Suddenly sound like thunder woke the rainbow manned mare.

"What the hay?!" she screamed, looking for the source of the offending sound. She then stopped and gaped at a dark hole, roughly the size of Big Macintosh, opened up above her, spilling out a pony.

"DISSSCOOOOOooorrrrrrdddd,,.....", screamed the pony in a masculine voice, showing Dash that the pony was a stallion, as he was rocketing towards the earth.

It took Rainbow Dash a few moments to process what she saw, "Omygosh! He's gonna crash!" she immediately launched herself from her cloud and flew towards the falling stallion, catching him with outstretched hooves and gently placed him on the ground.

Dash started to look at the stallion, who had passed out during his fall, to check for any injuries. She first noticed that the stallion looked just like one of Princess Luna's royal guard, which confused her since he didn't appear to be wearing any of the specially enchanted armor that gave the pegasi their bat-like appearance, but what confused her even more was that he didn't have a cutie mark, even though he looked around RD's age.

Realizing that she was looking at his flank longer than was deemed appropriate, she shook her head to clear the blush that was starting to form. "I wonder what happened to him," she wondered aloud before shrugging her shoulders, "eh, I bet Twilight has an answer.", she finished before picking up the still K.O'ed, stallion and carrying him to the Golden Oaks Library to hopefully get some answers from her friend.

***

Princess Twilight Sparkle, former student of Princess Celestia and Element of Magic, was in her room above the Golden Oaks Library, muzzle deep in a book when she heard a large boom, followed by an 'oof!'. The Alicorn immediately rushed downstairs to find her friend, Rainbow Dash, buried under a pile of books with a pony draped across her back, unconscious.

Twilight began to scold her friend, "Rainbow! What's going on?! Who is that?! And why-"

The princess was interrupted by a cyan hoof covering her mouth.

"Listen, Twi, I'll explain later, but right now he needs help." said the prismatic mare as she gestured over to the strange pony with her free hoof. Twilight looked over and noticed all the bruises and cuts that covered his body, then looked back at Rainbow Dash and nodded, allowing the Pegasus to remove her hoof from her friends' mouth.

Twilight rubbed her muzzle, "Take him up to my room and put him on the bed," she ordered as she proceeded to levitate the saddle bags he was wearing off of him and placed them by hers.

"Heh, guess you finally got a stallion into your bed." quipped Rainbow, causing Twilight to blush furiously.

"R- Rainbow Dash!?-" the lavender Alicorn started to say, before the cyan Pegasus started to laugh.

"Relax, Twi, I was only joking!" she said between giggles. Twilight huffed and stormed into the kitchen to look for bandages.

"Where's Spike?" asked Rainbow Dash, noticing the absence of the baby dragon.

"Oh, he's with Rarity, looking for gems, he won't be back for a while."

"Oh, okay," said the Pegasus as she proceeded to carry the still unconscious stallion up to her friends' room.

Welcome to Equestria

Pain.

That was the first thought that ran through Logan's mind as he slowly opened his eyes. The first thing that he took notice of was that the room appeared to be the one Twilight Sparkle lived in before its destruction at the hands of Tirek.

So, this obviously takes place before Twilight's Kingdom, oh, crap! That means that I have to probably fight that guy. But on the upside, I'll get to experience one of my top five battles... he contemplated before yawning.

That's when he saw a grey hoof in place of a hand.

"Holy crap!," he screamed, before covering his mouth, which had become a muzzle, as he immediately took notice was deeper and more mature than when he left.

Shakily, the now former human got out of the bed he was resting in, finding it a lot easier than he previously thought to balance and walk on four hooves.

Huh, he thought to himself, guess playing horsey with my little brother as a kid paid off., Logan then went through a door that lead into the bathroom to get a good look at his new body.

Awwww, yeah! Bat pony is best pony!, he thought cheerily while grinning at his reflection. He had become a Bat pony stallion, complete with ear tufts, his green-hazel eyes now almost cut clean vertically in half by cat-like pupils, with tiny fangs barely protruding from under his Lip, along with a short, blue mane with a grey streak running through it and a short tail, symbolizing his stallionhood to young children everywhere. He unfurled his bat-like wings in admiration, then turned to the side and noticed his lack of a cutie mark.

i]I'll cross that bridge when I get to it, he shrugged, then proceeded to walk downstairs to see if maybe Twilight was home, so he could get a good idea of how far back in time Discord sent him.

"So," he started to ay to himself, "if she's a unicorn that means it's anywhere between the aftermath of 'Keep Calm and Flutter On' and 'Magical Mystery Cure', if she's an alicorn, then it's anywhere in season-", he stopped abruptly, and what he saw next allowed him to see why Cloppers are turned on by Ponies.

The six ponies that he originally had thought of as 'cute' and 'adorable' now, to the help of his new biological concepts (courtesy of a certain draquenequis), were now six adult mares that actually looked kinda hot! First, he laid eyes on Applejack, which to his pony mind, now looked like a  strong, fit, hardworking farm pony with cute freckles and beautiful emerald eyes. Pinkie Pie, instead of making Logan think of cartoon cute, now went along the lines of 'pretty' cute, with her fun-filled, sky-blue eyes and curly mane and tail. Next was Twilight, who now had soft lavender eyes and perfectly preened alicorn wings (which helped him also to figure out what the time frame was), and a small, regal air about her. Rarity, while beautiful, didn't catch the Bat Pony's eye, I like girls who have a natural beauty and don't cover themselves with perfume and makeup to try to get others to notice them. Then there was Fluttershy, which to Logan was a sort of changed reflection of the unicorn, as she had a natural beauty and actually tried to hide her graceful features. But the mare to got the stallions' attention was a cyan Pegasus with a naturally colored rainbow mane and tail that had an athletic build and beautiful magneta eyes.

He soon heard a snicker and looked over to see that it originated from a bright pink mare who was trying to suppress a laugh. Logan then looked and saw four others suppressing smiles and looked behind himself to see two leathery wings sticking straight up in the air.

Huh, so wing boners are real, the bat pony silently mused and looked back to see the Pegasus he was just staring at a second Ago in an identical situation, blushing furiously, and Logan started to feel his face heat up.

"So," Twilight said awkwardly to the strange pony, "hello there, sir, do you know where you are?"

Logan shook his head to clear up the blush on his face as his wings returned to their positions at his sides and answered, "Yes, I do, Princess Twilight Sparkle, Element of Magic and one of the four alicorn princesses of Equestria."

Twilight merely nodded and asked, " what's your name?"

Logan thought to himself. What would be a good pony name, Logan Wynn doesn't work anymore, then it hit him, a name that would fit his new body, one of his favorite heroes nicknames, and a symbol for justice everywhere.

"My name is Dark Knight."

Snapped

"My name is Dark Knight."

The six mares all looked at him with confused expressions Dangit, I'm losing em!, Logan thought to himself, This name thing would be SO much easier if I had a cutie mark!. In order to save himself from utter embarrassment, he just started laughing, "I'm just messing with ya, that would be too much overkill where I come from!," the Bat pony said after his burst.

Twilight, however, was not amused, "Then, maybe you could be so kind as to tell us your real name?," she demanded.

"yeah, um, my name is, uh," Logan said as he frantically searched his memories for a name, Shadow Bolt? Nah, too suspicious, maybe Dracula? No, but that does give me an idea for Nightmare Night..., his thoughts were interrupted by an *ahem* originating from the princess

"Well? We're waiting.," Twilight stated, obviously sounding annoyed.

Before Logan could answer, however, his vision was suddenly blocked by a wall of pink

"Don't tell me you can't remember your own name?! That sooo terrible, because then I wouldn't be able to grow a surprise party for and if I can't do that then you won't be happy and-," the party pony was cut off by an ash-grey hoof in her mouth.

"Just give me a second to remember, Pinkie.," Logan answered. He then pulled his hoof out of the pink mares' mouth and continued, "My name is Blood Moon, and I'm not from around here, as you can plainly see."

"Well, duh," Rainbow Dash stated, "you're not exactly a normal pony."

"Oh?," the newly named Blood Moon asked, raising an eyebrow at the prismatic mare, "and why is that?"

"Well... um," Fluttershy spoke up for the first time since the beginning of this conversation, "it's just that... well... there are no Bat Ponies... well, for real, anyway."

It was then that B.M.'s world stopped. " Wait," the stallion interjected, "what do ya mean, there's no Bat Ponies? What about Princess Luna's royal guard?".

It was Rarity's turn to answer, "Oh, you mean the enchanted armor that gives them the illusion of being a Bat Pony? Those are just so tacky, darling.".

Rarity made a big mistake, for she just painted a giant target on her forehead with that statement. Blood Moon just found out he was the only Bat Pony in existence, and when that white fashionista dared to call something even remotely related to him 'tacky', something inside his mind snapped as he whirled around to face her, his wings flared and his muzzle a mere inches away from hers. "How dare you think of fashion at a time like this?! How would YOU like it if somepony just told you that you were the only Unicorn in existence, except for royal guards that wear so-called 'tacky' enchanted armor to look like said Unicorns?!".

The Element of Generosity started to tear up, her eye liner mixing with fresh tears.

"Oh, so you think that by crying like you always do will make me forgive you, just like that?!," the stallion demanded, "Well, news-flash, I find mares that think that they can get whatever the buck they want by putting on a buck-ton of make-up and batting their eyelashes at whomever just happens to pass by absolutely DISGUSTING!". The other elements could only watch in a mixture of shock, awe, and horror at the strange pony's sudden outburst.

Blood Moon just continued his verbal onslaught, despite Rarity bursting into tears, "What, can't handle the truth?! Well, reality is a bitch like that!", he then lowered his head until he was eye level with the now sobbing mare. "It's ponies like you that make other mares and stallions think that they're worthless and ugly, having no place on this Earth," he stated, his voice just barely above a whisper, "it's ponies like you, that cause beautiful mares and handsome stallions to cut, starve, even KILL themselves because they believe that they'll never be as good as you,". Blood Moon then rose back to his hooves and trotted past the other five elements.

The Bat Pony opened the door to the library before turning back to the still sobbing Rarity before stating, "Think about that, next time you get a little mud in your mane.", and with that, he  took off towards Sweet Apple Acres, or more specifically, the Cutie Mark Crusaders' clubhouse.

Flutterbat rape and apologies

Twilight just stared at the now open door through which the mysterious pony named "Blood Moon" escaped after yelling at Rarity for critiquing the Night Guards' armor. Rarity was still sobbing on the floor, her mascara now running down her cheeks, Fluttershy was laying on the floor, unconscious after having passed out sometime during the grey stallions tirade, Applejack left to take care of the harvest with Big Macintosh, still unhappy with the stranger's parting words, and Pinkie left after a while to start planning a "Welcome to Ponyville/ We're sorry that you're the only Bat Pony" party to hopefully cheer Blood Moon up after he cooled down. Rainbow Dash, surprisingly, instead of chasing after Blood Moon and attacking him, just hovered a few feet off the ground, gaping at the doorway just like Twilight.

Rainbow was the first to speak of the two, "I... I think I'll take Fluttershy back to her place...," and gathered the passed out mare onto her back and walked out of the library. Twilight then walked over to comfort Rarity, who had just stopped crying.

"Are you going to be alright?" asked the lavender alicorn.

"Yes," replied Rarity, "I just need to go home and rest." and with that, Rarity got up and made her way to the door to the library, just as Spike walked in, returning from running errands for Twilight.

"Hey, Rarity," said the baby dragon, but the white mare just ignored him and continued out the door, "what happened to her?"

Twilight ignored Spike's question as well, "Spike, take a letter," ordered the princess. Spike complied by pulling out a parchment and quill from the desk, "Dear Princess Celestia, two days ago Rainbow Dash brought a most unusual stallion to the library, as he was unconscious..."

***

It was a quiet afternoon at Sweet Apple Acres. Well, quiet except for the sounds of the only Bat Pony in existence banging his head against the inner walls of the Cutie Mark Crusaders clubhouse.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," repeated Blood Moon repeated to himself with every strike on the wood before finally stopping and rubbing his forehead with his left hoof, "Just great, Logan, ya were in Ponyville for no more than twenty minutes, and you go and make the Element of Generosity cry!"

Could've been worse, a voice in his head reminded him, You could've made FLUTTERSHY cry.

Yeah, you're right, the Bat Pony agreed. He then heard two ponies' talking close by, and upon looking out of the window revealed to be Applejack and Big Macintosh.

         "I'm tellin' ya, Big Mac," said Applejack, "it was like he jus' became an entirely different pony. I mean, one second he's all happy - go - lucky an' the next, he's all over Rarity, makin' the poor girl cry over something about her causing Ponies' to harm themselves!".

Oooo, Blood Moon thought, that bad. In truth, the stallion could barely remember his rage - fueled tirade over the alabaster mare's critiquing his kind.

         He sighed as he remembered the look on a certain blue pegasus' face, for some odd reason the only thing he could remember from the entire ordeal. Then he noticed that the Apple siblings had long since left and Celestia's sun was setting, making way for Luna's moon.

Ah, well, I guess I can find Rarity tomorrow and apologize. thought the Bat Pony as he made his way to the far corner of the tree house, where he curled up and drifted off to sleep.

                                                     ***

             Blood Moon was woken up by the sound of screaming.

"Was zum Teufel?!", screamed the Bat Pony in German (he learned in high school a year before). He only ever swore when he was in pain or pissed, the former being the cause due to his sensitive bat ears. He looked out the window to what was the cause of his suffering to see five familiar mares running and/or flying from something that struck the stallion as oddly familiar, but he couldn't place his hoof on it.

Now, any sensible pony who saw five of the six Elements of Harmony, one of them an alicorn princess, running scared from something would run/fly/teleport AWAY from the creature chasing them.

Unfortunately for said creature, it was the reason the Elements screamed and woke him up. And it was previously established as to what happens with Logan Wynn when someone wakes him up, so why should Blood Moon be any different?

Before even Pinkie Pie could say "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious", the enraged stallion flew out of the clubhouse window and had tackled the creature chasing the mares.

"Alright," Blood Moon said to the creature, " I'm gonna let you go and give you a ten second head start, then I'm going to hunt you down, and-," the Bat Pony never got to finish as he finally got a good look at what, or rather, WHOM, was chasing the girls. She was a pale yellow pony with a ruffled mane and tail equally pale pink and crimson red eyes, fangs noticeably larger than Blood Moon's own, with wings that, like the stallion's, was bat-like, but instead was more of a mix between a birds and a bats' wings, which were also much larger than his and had the bat thumb on the ends. She, he now knew that it was a mare after noticing the body structure, had a cutie mark that was almost a dead ringer for a certain timid Pegasus', except instead of three pink butterflies there were three pink bats in the same positions of the butterflies.

Ah, crap..., Blood Moon thought to himself as he now realized who she was, why'd it have to be THIS episode?.

The mare staring back at him was none other than Flutterbat, Fluttershy's Vampony counterpart who had came to be after the poor mare had absorbed the vampire fruit bats' instincts from using the Stare on them while Twilight used a spell to eradicate said instincts so they would stop eating the apples in the orchard, which worked in the sense that the bats stopped eating the apples, but Fluttershy became half vampire. He also noticed that she was giving him a weird look.

He turned to the only pony that could answer his question. "Hey, Princess Egghead!", he called to Twilight who, with the other four, had stopped running after seeing the Vampony get tackled by the Bat Pony.

"What?", asked the alicorn, miffed that a random stranger knew Rainbow Dash's nickname for her.

"Do you know why she's lookin' at me like this?" he asked as he gestured with a hoof to Flutterbat, who had taken on a more seductive look towards the stallion.

Twilight looked over at her transformed friend and saw the look, immediately recognizing it from one of the books she read about vampire fruit bats in when she was figuring out what spell to use on them.

"Of course," she answered matter of factly, "it's a face that female vampire fruit bats make when they find a suitable mate." no sooner had she said it when she realized what it was that she had said. "Uh-oh..." she said as she looked at the now worried Blood Moon.

"yeah, uh-oh." he echoed as he quickly got off of Flutterbat and bolted behind the mares. "can somepony please tell her that I'm not interested?", he asked worriedly.

"Why can't ya jus' go over there an' tell 'er that?" asked a visibly irritated Applejack, "don't you speak Batponese or somethin'?"

"Two reasons," Blood Moon deadpanned, "one: that's racist, two: there's no such language since I'm pretty much the only Bat Pony in existence. Oh, and sorry for yelling at you, Rarity," he added to the Unicorn, " I don't know what came over me. I didn't mean to yell at  you."

"It's quite all right, darling," the fashionista replied, noticing the sincerity in the Bat Pony's voice, "but I also apologize for the way I handled the situation, I would have reacted the same way if I were in your hooves, as it were."

"That's nice and all," Rainbow Dash said, actually a little happy that the two made up, " but what're we gonna do about 'Shy?" she asked as she gestured towards the now horny Vampony.

"Don't worry, dear," Rarity answered, looking at Blood Moon with a mischievous glint in her eye which sent chills down his spine, "I believe we have found a way to both make Mr. Moon and myself even as well as give us time to formulate a plan."

"Ohhh," responded three of the four other mares, while Blood Moon and Rainbow Dash looked at each other and shrugged.

Then in a flash of magneta light, all five mares were gone, leaving a shocked Blood Moon and a horny Flutterbat alone with each other.

The stallion looked over at the mare and bolted, the latter not wasting time following after.

***

It had taken an hour, but they had finally transformed Flutterbat back into Fluttershy, and afterwards the other five mares and stallion Pinkie Promised never to tell the shy Pony's 'intentions' for Blood Moon while she was a Vampony, lest they make her cry, which, in Blood Moon's opinion, was a sin worse than murder, and the others started to head home, leaving the Bat Pony alone with a certain cyan mare.

"So...", Rainbow said while scratching the back of her head, "do you wanna come to my place and spend the night?", she asked  Blood Moon while trying to suppress a blush forming on her cheeks.

"Uh... sure?" he responded, trying to hold back a blush of his own as he followed the prismatic mare to her cloud mansion. He would ask her why she offered in the morning, but now was the time for sleep.