Bullet shells, blurring my mind as an array of fiery rounds flew my way. A mare shrieks, watching with eyes made of glass, body frozen like stuffed animals. I can feel my sanity erupting as the bullets grow ever closer, the cords keeping my brain intact falling like tattered string. My heart thrashing and mind crumbling.
I can’t help but crack a smile as the memory of my father comes into play. The way he always gave me a pat on the head after doing something right, like acing a test or scoring a goal in soccer. The way he told me bedtime stories as my eyes flickered and died, lying peacefully in a deep slumber.
Then I saw my mother, the happiness that never left her violet eyes, the warm smell of freshly cooked pastries lingering in the air whenever she approached. The way her grin could melt hearts and bring armies of brutes to shame.
Then my brother. I still remember that day, that crazy day in the hospital. The whole family crowding my now placid mother, cradling the infant colt in her weak arms. My young eyes meeting with his as I felt a bombardment of joy fire within me. The toothless smile he gifted me that wonderful day.
When we brought him home, the moon glowing down upon our house as my father and I yawned in unison. It’s safe to say no pony slept that night, with all the crying and what not. But his juvenile behavior matured and we formed quite a good relationship. Playing ball in the backyard, our intense videogame sessions, and the crazed dingdong ditches we participated in will forever remain carved into my memory, for they were some of the best moments of my life.
I remember our first day of grade school, the way I always teased him about that little crush he had. Those burning eyes that stung like daggers when he told me to shut up always made me laugh.
Soon that little filly friend and him got together. I watched with an envy stricken conscience as they paraded about the schoolyard, laughing, joking, hugging, kissing.
The jealousy burnt like the flames of a torch, knowing my younger sibling had a better way with girls never failed to irritate me. Looking back on it, I can’t help but laugh at how childishly upset I was over the whole situation.
I remember going to my dad, begging for some advice. As I expected, I was lectured with how important a relationship can be, and how I shouldn’t just jump into it like I wanted to. Of course he was right, but back then I didn’t understand the meaning of patients. I just wanted a filly friend of my own.
To make a long story short about tragic failure after failure with the school girls, I decided to quit on trying to lock lips with any pony till I was older.
Middle school came along and my brother’s little filly friend moved away. At first I was glad, glad to see my sibling and me on equal terms when it came to relationships. But that night I was awoken by the moaning cries from his bedroom. I felt as if possessed by some sort of demon. How could I have been so cruel?
He cried on my shoulder that night, his body quaking in my arms.
+++
As bullets meet with flesh, blood runs cold and I fail to move my limbs. The world turns to a blur as the grotesque smell of copper emanated from my chest. As I fall to the floor, I could hear screaming, but everything seemed muffled like two hoofs were pressed against my ears.
More shrieks echoed through my wavering mind and all felt to go black as night. Then something brought me back to reality. The slightest surge of life left jumping against the barrier of death. I could feel tears falling to my face as hooves pressed down on my blood soaked chest. Then I heard her voice, quiet and incoherent above my dying body.
More visions and memories came back to me. The first day of freshman year. I grow more and more ecstatic the closer my brother and I reach the school gates. Hundreds of students rush to their appointed classes as my sibling and I part ways.
It was period one when I saw her, sitting quietly across the classroom, fiddling with a pencil as her turquoise eyes glow like beacons through a blizzard. Her bright pink mane obscuring her face as if tempting me to part her hair like an ocean, left so curious as to what gorgeous feature lie beyond her mane. I may have only been fifteen, but I swore to had experienced what felt like a burning passion that wouldn’t dim when facing the coldest of tundra’s.
As class began, it’s safe to say I didn’t listen to a single word the teacher spoke, I don’t even remember getting his name as the students cleared out for period two. She seemed to stay behind as the others left, taking an exceptionally long time packing up her saddle bags.
I stood still across the room, attempting to take just as long in hopes I bump into her while walking out the door. My plan seemed to work as I approached, but that’s when my legs felt to brake. I couldn’t move any closer towards her, for fear had stricken me. I only watched as she walked off, the dreaded feeling of failure coursing within. But it was only the first day of school; many more chances were still left to come.
That night I remained awake, staring dreamily at the ceiling of my room, for this girl had left hieroglyphs on my bones, inerasable.
Many days pass of me failing to find courage to say anything to her. But a few weeks after the school year began, I came across her during lunch, sitting behind the cafeteria, squirrels and birds perched along her arms as the sense of pure harmony wondered throughout the warm autumn air.
I was left dumbfounded. I had never witnessed such peace, such glorious calmness. Without control of my limbs, I inched towards her, yearning to finally announce my presence.
As I sat by her side in the tall grass, she flinched and the animals bolted back into the shrubbery. I apologized a million times for startling her, but she didn’t seem to talk, only stare.
I felt lost in her gaze as I asked her name.
Fluttershy.
Her voice trailing off in the wind like the fading mist from a gun barrel. It took a while, but some sort of bond began to form between us as we sat beside the timid animals. I no longer felt that dreaded fear that once haunted me, for I had never been more placid.
I remember that day, the day we stayed after school at our usual spot in the grass, laughing, talking. She taught me how to earn the animals trust. She called me a natural.
As the sun set that evening and she rested her sleepy head atop my chest, we stared up at the fading clouds, and we kissed. A spark of lighting bursting within my heart, thunderous booms of ecstatic glee rumbling my innards like an earthquake.
A week after that wonderful evening, we had decided to grab some ice cream after school. On our way there, walking alone along the eroded sidewalk towards town, holding each other’s hoofs, a rather large stallion approached us from the side.
He wore a jacket of pure leather and a grimace look of despair adorned his partially hidden face. He seemed to pace back and forth along the sidewalk ahead of us. The man was obviously not in the right mind.
I could feel Fluttershy’s hoof grow clammy in mine as I took a gander at her stone cold stare. I whispered to her that it was fine; we’d just walk past him and be on our way. She unwillingly nodded.
There was no way around this guy due to the fact that we wondered a straight path down the vacant road, so approaching was our only option. With heads down and hooves trembling, we tried to bypass him without making contact.
Just as we were passed him, his soulless eyes seemed to meet with mine before he spoke up.
“Hey, you two!” he shouted, “let me talk to ya for a sec.”
We quickened our pace and soon went into full gallop, our adrenalin pulsing at the seams. I could hear heavy hoofsteps boom from behind us.
He was pursuing us.
Fluttershy squeaked as I watched her face go pale, struggling to run as fast her as legs could carry.
“Hey, get back here!” the deranged stallion laughed, “I only want to talk.”
We cut corners as the orange sky and setting sun cast over everything, shadows stretching and morphing. I could hear Flutterhy begin to cry as I tugged her along, her breath unsteady and wavering.
“Why is he doing this?!” she squeaked.
“I don’t know,” I replied, my eyes locked with the path ahead, “but we have to keep running!”
Eventually, my worst nightmare became a reality. We took a wrong turn and found ourselves at a dead end, the massive brick wall standing tall like a blockade to freedom. The alley we stood in reeked of garbage and decomposing rodents. Our pursuer stood at the dark entrance between these two building, the sun casting his shadow over us as if he was a giant.
Fluttershy’s hoofs went weak as she fell to the ground, pleading with the stallion before us. “Please! Please just leave us alone!”
I knelt down beside her, holding her in my arms. “What do you want from us?” I asked.
The stallion giggled as his raspy voice met with my ears. “Man, you two are fast,” he chuckled, trying to catch his breath, “But now that I have you where I want you, let’s try to make this easy.”
I sat by Fluttershy as I watched him approach, his daunting figure looming over us both. “Now,” he began, “I couldn’t help notice all those bits bouncing about in your saddle bags… give it to me, all of it.”
Without a word, I gestured Fluttershy to open her bag, give him the money. I did the same. He looked over the assortment of gold coins as a horrific sense of defeat washed over me.
“Please, sir,” Fluttershy begged, her voice quiet and muffled from the crying, “Can we please go now?”
The stallion rested a hoof on his chin, thinking for a moment. I feared escaping from this thug’s grasp wouldn’t be that easy. That is when he did something unsuspected. I watched as his eyes scanned Fluttershy’s body, a crooked grin stretching across his face. “The boy can leave,” he said, “but you….” He leaned down, now at eye to eye level with Fluttershy. “I want you,” he whispered into her ear.
Before anything was said, I jumped to my hooves. “Get the fuck out of here! You already took all our money! So just leave!”
“Oh, is that so, little boy?” he said through clenched teeth. I looked down at Fluttershy who stared in disbelieving shock.
I nodded.
The stallion’s eyebrows narrowed as he reached into his jacket pocket. “I was hoping we could do this easily. I guess not.”
Then I saw it. The gun, clasped tightly in his hoof, trained on me. My body fidgeted as Fluttershy began to scream, my eyes glued to the killing machine.
“This is your last chance, kid” he said, “Just let the girl come with me, and no pony has to die.”
My blood coursing, brain racing, mind exploding, I jump into fight or flight. “Fluttershy, run!!” I screamed, charging the stallion, hoping to stall him long enough for her to escape.
I tried to grab the gun from his hoofs, wrestling him for it. He laughed at my feeble attempts at dominating his superior strength.
Fluttershy yelled from behind me, “No! I’m not leaving you!”
Before I could reply, I felt the butt of the gun hit my head, the world spinning as I hit the floor.
I heard muffled screams as the stallion aimed the gun at my chest, firing the weapon.
Everything went black in an instant, and now I’m here, recalling the final memories of my life before they fade away like dust in the wind.
I don’t know what my family will think, how they’ll respond to all this, but I am left wondering.
Did Fluttershy escape?
Did she make it out of that alley way?
I can only pray. But no matter what, if I am to forever rest in this black abyss that is death, I will never forget the one’s I love. My mother, father, brother… Fluttershy.
