Wedding Bells Bug Hunt

Chapters

Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Interlude 1
Interlude 2
Interlude 3
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Epilogue
Chapter 1
Chapter 7

Chapter 2

Rainbow Dash felt her jaw idly drop open as her thoughts raced a dozen different ways at once. Each thought, each question jockeyed to be vocalized first only for them to trip over each other. In the end, all Rainbow could get out was “W-whaaa?!”

Princess Celestia dipped her head, her horn glowing. Rainbow heard the tell-tale ‘click’ that indicated that she had locked the doors and latched the windows. With the drapes and curtains drawn closed, the normally bright, open and well-lit room of the Princess of the sun was unnaturally dark. “Forgive me, but we cannot risk being found out.”

After nodding weakly, Rainbow managed to straighten her thoughts out enough to ask the foremost question on her mind. “What about my friends?”

Celestia sighed and sat back on the floor. “If the changelings are moving against Equestria—going so far as to infiltrate and replace members of the royal guard—then they must have taken steps to ensure that the Elements of Harmony cannot be used against them. With even one of your friends missing, the Elements are incapable of functioning.”

“Who is it? Are they okay?” Rainbow blurted out, pacing back and forth and lashing her tail. Her wings twitched as she repressed the urge to fly through the door and check on each and every one of her friends.

“I do not know.” Celestia’s shoulders sagged. “I can tell you that whoever has been replaced has not been harmed. It’s not their way.”

Rainbow felt herself untense slightly. “Just—what are those things?!”

“Nopony can say for sure.” Celestia rose to her hooves and walked over to her window, staring out despite the curtains being drawn. “The origin of the changelings has been lost to history; theories abound about where they came from and how they came to be. Some say that they were creations of Discord. Some believe that they were the result of a mad unicorn’s experiments. A few even claim that they were ponies once, a lost breed once known as Flutter Ponies, twisted and ruined by some fell enchantment or curse.” Celestia turned back to face her pupil.

“Regardless of what they may have once been, now they are parasites. They feed off the emotions of other beings—especially love. But they are incapable of feeling genuine love or affection themselves; thus, they are forced to feed off the love of others. They do this by abducting a pony and masquerading as them—drawing strength and sustenance from the love of their victim’s loved ones.” She frowned, and held up a wing to forestall Rainbow’s question. “They keep their victims alive and cocoon them so they can feed on their love too, as well as access their memories so they can better impersonate them. In time, those who the changelings feed on for an extended period begin to fall under their mental thrall.”

Rainbow felt the gorge rise her throat as she pictured Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity or Pinkie Pie trapped in some disgusting bug cocoon so they could feed off them and rifle through their minds on how to better pretend to be them. If she saw a changeling right then and there, she would’ve splattered it with her bare hooves. “We gotta find and rescue them!”

“I assure you, we will do everything possible for them,” Celestia vowed. “However, finding changelings is no easy task when they can impersonate a pony’s appearance, voice, memories, and even their skills to a limited extent. Worse still is their leader, the insidious Queen Chrysalis. She is a cruel, vicious and avaricious monster.”

“How come I never heard of them?” Rainbow asked. “I mean, okay, I might not be the absolute best student ever, but I think I would’ve remembered hearing about giant bugponies that steal love.”

“They reside in hives in the most isolated and desolate regions of the world: deep in mountains or in caverns beneath the ground. They’ve been so far removed from pony consciousness that most forgot that they even existed.” Celestia shook her head. “Some dismissed them as mere rumors—bedtime stories to scare naughty foals into behaving.”

“Well how the feathering hay did they get so far?” Rainbow demanded. “I mean, there had to have been something, some pony you could have appointed to keep this sort of stuff from happening!” She shivered in an adrenaline-fueled rush of fear and anger. Celestia approached and slowly extended her hoof, gently rubbing Rainbow’s frightened face. Although she wanted to stay angry, Rainbow nuzzled her mentor's hoof, welcoming her comfort.

Once Rainbow was calm enough, Celestia continued. “Before she became Nightmare Moon, Princess Luna was Equestria’s defender of the night. One of her greatest strengths was flushing out creatures who sought to use her night as a cover. Since Luna was banished, so many creatures that sought to lurk and hide in her night were able to elude detection and were lost to our sight and our knowledge.”

A sad, tired look crossed her regal face. It was Rainbow’s turn to comfort her, nuzzling the princess’s long neck lovingly. Celestia draped a wing over Rainbow’s back. “With Luna’s absence, Equestria’s ability to monitor such beings was greatly hampered. I can assume that with her return and Sombra’s downfall, the changelings sought to strike first before they could be discovered.”

“And now they’re here.” Rainbow’s face hardened. “And they took one of my best friends? Oh, they are so asking for it! Let’s call my friends in and flush the fake into the open with magic and force it to tell us where the real pony is!”

Celestia hesitated. “I’m afraid it’s not quite that simple.”

Rainbow stomped her hoof in frustration. “What? Why not?”

“As I said, I had begun to hear rumors that something was stirring. I sent Luna with an advance force to patrol the borders of Equestria. Even if I sent her a message asking her to return, it would take some time for her to do so. Her arrival would only tip our hooves that we know the changelings are in Canterlot. It might cause them to accelerate their plans. Worse, I cannot be entirely sure that Luna herself has not been replaced by this point.”

Rainbow stomped again. “Grrr … darn it! Can’t you do it?” Celestia paused, as if weighing on how to best deliver bad news. Dash groaned. “There’s more?”

“I’m afraid so,” Celestia confirmed. “Changelings share a limited group consciousness. Even if we were to locate and isolate the imposter, it could easily send a warning to the others.” She looked to Dash. “You said the ones that confronted you and Zecora didn’t recognize you?” When she shook her head, Celestia continued. “It’s possible Zecora had cast some sort of glamour or magical guise that distorted their vision of you. While your escape was unfortunate from their point of view, it was not so critical as to force them to step up their timetable.”

“So, that’s good--they don’t know we’re onto them, right?” Rainbow asked. “So what do we do now?”

Celestia straightened herself up and looked Rainbow squarely in the eye. “Rainbow Dash, I am charging you with investigating and finding the imposter amongst your friends without letting on what you are doing, before the changelings can initiate whatever plan they’re up to.”

The young pegasus was rocked back on her hooves, sitting down hard on the floor. “Me?! But—”

“It can only be you.” Celestia urged. “You know your friends better than I; and I must, carefully, begin my own investigation to determine who among my guard and the castle staff is not who they say they are. Until we are sure that all the changelings in the palace are accounted for, we cannot risk informing anypony of what we’ve learned.”

Rainbow’s mind raced. “W-what if all my friends are changelings?”

“Unlikely. That would be a pointless duplication of efforts on Chrysalis’ part, when only one of your friends needs to be removed for the Elements to be rendered sterile. Having more would only increase the risk of detection and draw their resources away from other venues.” She slowly wrapped a wing around Dash. “I know this is a lot to absorb and that what I’m asking you to do is not easy. But there is no other way. I know you can do it. I have faith in you.”

Rainbow gave a shaky sigh. “Yeah. Of course I can!” She shot Celestia her most winning smile. “I can do this!”

“I can’t do this!” Rainbow Dash groaned to herself as she made her way down to join her friends for dinner. “I’m not Fetlock Hooves! How am I to find the fake without letting them know that –I– know they’re a fake? Twilight could do this; she’s super smart and stuff! And Applejack’s so honest she can probably tell whoever’s a fraud. Rarity can spot a knockoff design a mile away and Fluttershy could just ask nicely and anypony—or changeling—would just spill the beans. And Pinkie Pie—well, she’s Pinkie Pie. But ME?”

Dash stopped by a column and bonked her head against it, ignoring the odd looks by a pair of passing guards. I’m such a lunkhead that I didn’t even notice that one of my friends was replaced out from under my own nose. I can’t even figure out who keeps raiding the icecloud at the weather office and eats all my snacks!

“No. Pull it together, Rainbow Dash.” She pulled herself up and smacked herself with a hoof. “You are Rainbow Miriam Dash and you can featherin’ handle this. The fate of Equestria and your friends rests on finding out which one of them is a no-good, low-down lying, love-stealing bug monster. And you’re gonna do it. No, ifs ands or buts about it. You go that? Remember who you are! Who are you?”

“Um, Rainbow Dash?”

“That’s right! I’m Rainbow DaAAH!” She whirled around, wings flared open and hooves boxing the air in front of her. “Who is it, show yourself?”

Twilight Sparkle looked at her as if she had lost her mind. “Uh, it’s just me Rainbow. I was going to walk with you to the dining room … I kinda got a little lost.” She sheepishly added. “Kind of took a detour into the guards’ shower room.” She looked down and traced a hoof along the floor, her face heating.

Rainbow Dash chuckled and felt herself relax. “So, you got a show before dinner? Nice.” It was just Twilight being Twilight. Then she stiffened. But then, if she were a changeling, she’d know just how to act like Twilight, wouldn’t she?

Twilight blushed and rubbed at her neck, “So, is everything okay? I mean, you were talking to a wall.”

“You hear anything?” Rainbow demanded.

The purple unicorn shook her head. “Just you reminding yourself that you were, well, you.” She tilted her head at her. “You okay?”

“’f course I am! I was just—” she thought quickly “—psyching myself up for my Sonic Rainboom!” She flashed Twilight what she hoped was a confident grin. “You gotta get yourself in the right mindset, y’know? S’like that one guy said: the mental is to the physical as … um, something big to something small.”

“That’s Neighpoleon, and it’s ‘as three is to one.’” Twilight rubbed her muzzle. “Hm, I hadn’t thought of it before, but that’s a good point. That’s actually really insightful of you!” She nudged her athletic friend and ribbed her playfully. “Who are you and what’ve you done with Rainbow Dash?”

It was all Rainbow Dash could do not to break down either laughing or crying. She was saved by a sudden loud growl from her stomach. Dash had been hungry even before she encountered Zecora and got into a fight with the changelings. Now she was really hungry.

Twilight quirked her brow. “Wow. I guess you’re really famished, huh? We better get a move on. We don’t want Rarity and the others to think we kept them waiting.” She paused. “Also, I don’t want to risk Pinkie Pie eating all our desserts.”

“Good idea.” Rainbow nodded. “After you.” If Twilight was the changeling, she didn’t want to turn her back on her. Of course, there were four other suspects … gyah!

Twilight smiled at her, oblivious to Dash’s internal torment. “Thanks. But I still don’t know where we’re going.”

“Right. Okay, come on then.” Rainbow hurried ahead, barely giving Twilight a chance to catch up.

“Whoa, hold your horses, Rainbow!” Twilight trotted up beside her, leaning against her comfortingly. “No need to rush.” She paused as she felt Rainbow flinch away slightly. “…is everything okay?” She gasped when she saw a bruise on Rainbow’s side, mistaking that for the cause of Rainbow’s flinch. “What happened?”

Rainbow winced. She’d forgotten about the fight. It was a good thing there weren’t more injuries for her to hide. Most of what she’d gotten in that little dust up were minor and easy to hide. “Oh, that? I, er, well I—I—”

With a martyred groan, Twilight shook her head. “Did you crash into a mountain again?”

Despite the situation, Rainbow couldn’t help but defend her reputation. “Hey! Pinkie Pie was totally distracting me that one time!”

“I thought you were aware of all your surroundings when you fly?”

“Yeah, well Pinkie is so Pinkie that she can drown out everything else around me.” Rainbow grumbled, crossing her forelimbs in a pout.

Twilight gave a faint nod of acknowledgement. “Well, just be careful alright?”

You don’t need to tell me, Dash repressed a sigh. “Sure. So, dinner?”

“Dinner.” The two made their way through the long corridors of the castle and soon found themselves in a large, private dining room. Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy were already seated around a long table, laden with plates of delicious looking, but untouched, food. They looked up when Twilight and Rainbow Dash walked through the doors.

“There y’all are!” Applejack beamed. “’bout time you showed up. I don’t know ‘bout the rest of you, but I’m hungrier than a chimera without a hunk of ricotta!”

Rarity blinked owlishly. “That doesn't even begin to make sense.”

“Yes it does.” Applejack and Pinkie said in unison. Applejack looked at her curiously, but Pinkie just smiled. Deciding not to dwell on it, AJ turned back to Rarity. “...’xactly.”

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Do speak for yourself, Applejack. And at any rate, some of us were perfectly content to wait with poise and grace for our friends to arrive before eating. Isn’t that right?” She looked to her remaining two friends…only to find that Pinkie had burrowed her face into her plate the moment the others had walked in the door. Rarity groaned. “Fluttershy?”

“If you say so Rarity,” the yellow pegasus ducked her head behind her mane as she softly added. “I was getting awfully hungry … but it wouldn’t have been nice to eat without Rainbow Dash and Twilight.”

Rarity gave Applejack a proud smirk. “You see? None of us had trouble waiting…” her stomach chose that moment to let out a growl worthy of a manticore. Pinkie pulled her face out of plateful of noodles and gasped.

“Rarity’s tummy is gonna eat all the food! And then it’s gonna eat us! Oh my goooooosh! Run for your lives!” She leapt into the air and ran for the door. A moment later she came back, loaded her forelimbs full of plates—going heavy on the desserts—and then ran from the room again.

“You were sayin’ something?” Applejack drawled smugly as Rarity sank in her seat, cheeks red.

Rainbow felt a smile tug at her lips as she sat down…only to remember that one of the ponies at the dinner table was a fake. The thought was depressing enough to almost kill her appetite. Almost.

Pinkie Pie poked her back through the door after Twilight and Rainbow Dash sat down. “Aww, aren’t any you gonna panic with me?”

“Panic later, food now.” Applejack rubbed her hooves together as she looked over the spread in front of her. “I dunno where to start!”

Her dignity having recovered itself somewhat, Rarity chimed in as Pinkie rejoined them. “You start with the appetizers! You’re in Canterlot now, you can’t simply dig into your meal at random like an uncultured hayseed bumpkin!”

“You leave my cousin Hayseed out of this!” Applejack huffed, rolling her eyes. “Fiiiine. So which are the appetizers?” Upon seeing the plate Rarity pointed to, Applejack blinked incredulously. “Those? They’re so tiny! They look like the free mints y’get on your pillow at hotels!” She frowned. “Kinda disappointed we didn’t get any of those in our rooms, come to mention it.”

“…This isn’t a hotel.” Rarity said slowly, incredulousness building with each word. “This is Canterlot Castle.”

“I’m just sayin’ is all…”

As the two bickered, Rainbow Dash looked from Applejack to Rarity and back again. Was one of them the changeling? If so, the love-stealing bug was doing a pretty darn good job of falling into their normal routine.

Hay, this was pretty familiar ground. Having found the first course of her meal, Applejack hesitated as she was confronted with a mountain of virtually indistinguishable silverware. Everytime she reached out a hoof for one implement, Rarity let out a dainty cough and gave her a look. Rainbow Dash sympathized with AJ. She’d been there.

“Rainbow Dash?” She barely repressed jumping out of her seat as Fluttershy gently tapped her shoulder. “Are you okay? You’ve barely touched your food.”

“Fine!” Dash yelped loudly. “Totally fine!” She swallowed nervously as everypony’s eyes turned on her. Ack! I can’t raise their suspicions! Must act like everything is normal. Act like me, me! …Okay, how do I act like me? Acting solely on instinct, Rainbow picked up a bread roll and tossed it at Rarity, which made a rather amusing bonk sound as it bounced off her head and ricocheted off Applejack’s. “Nice, two for one!”

An aggrieved expression on Rarity’s face told her that she’d been successful. “Rainbow Daaash! I cannot believe you!”

“I can!” Pinkie chimed in helpfully. “That was so totally Rainbow Dash! And did you see that bread roll? It was all zoom, bonk, bounce, bap!”

“Funnily enough, I can believe it too.” Applejack deadpanned as she reached for a bread roll of her own, eyes narrowing in Rainbow’s direction. Dash readied another roll of her own.

Rarity sputtered indignantly. “Rainbow Dash! Applejack! Stop that! We’re in Canterlot! In the palace! We cannot simply behave like uncouth ruffians who—Ack!” She was cut off as not one, but two bread rolls found their mark.

“Mighty fine shooting, Rainbow.” Applejack snerked as she grabbed another and throwing it at Dash.

Rarity fumed, her face glowing red. “Oh it is on!” She began loading up bread rolls and tossing them back at her assailants. “Take this! You! Uncultured! Louts!”

One errant bread roll lodged itself in Fluttershy’s mane. “I think this is yours, Rarity.” She gently lobbed the roll back at her … then giggled as it landed in Rarity’s soup, splashing the white unicorn’s coat.

Fighting the urge to get fully into the awesome looking food fight that was shaping up, Rainbow Dash took a step back to observe. Okay. One of my best friends—the most awesome, greatest friends ever—has been replaced by a love-eating bug. She had to repress the urge to fly over and shake each one of her friends one by one until the fake confessed. Instead she forced herself to take a deep breath and try to think things through, the way Princess Celestia had been trying to get her to do.

So which one of them is acting strangely?

She watched as Pinkie Pie leaped out of her seat and sailed across the table—somehow managing to do so in slow motion. “Nooooooooooooo…” A slow-drawn out version of Pinkie’s voice exclaimed as a bread roll went sailing towards her. Her mouth opened wide, becoming a gaping black maw that swallowed the bread whole before Pinkie’s dive returned to moving in regular time.

…Nope, nothing strange there.

Rainbow Dash looked to Fluttershy, who was neatly making her way through her meal but stopping every once in a while to giggle and playfully toss a napkin or something at the others. Normally Dash would be happy to see Fluttershy being more outgoing and playful. Hay, she’d been trying to get Fluttershy to do that for years. But now she wasn’t sure if she was seeing her efforts pay off—or a changeling who didn’t quite have all of Fluttershy’s facets down.

Applejack, silverware and fancy manners forgotten, stuck her face into her food and was happily chowing down like a pig at the slop trough. If anything, she made a show out of her disregard for manners in order to Rarity in a fit of apoplexy.

While clearly affronted by Applejack’s display, Rarity just ended putting that much effort into being as dainty and polite as possible, going overboard even by her standards: taking tiny bites, chewing slowly and dabbing a napkin at her mouth after every single solitary mouthful.

Not seeing anything that screamed ‘I’m a changeling imposter!’ Rainbow Dash turned to Twilight to see her … completely and utterly pigging out on her food with all sense of restraint or dignity forgotten.

What. The. Hay?

Rainbow’s jaw dropped when she saw Twilight use a stray bread roll tossed down her end of the table to use as an ersatz napkin: wiping off ketchup and sauce and other stray bits that clung to her muzzle—and then proceeded to eat it!

Aaand suspect number one is…

Apparently, Dash wasn’t the only one who noticed. Pinkie Pie, who had been licking her plate clean with her tongue, stopped to stare with wide eyes. Fluttershy let out a surprised squeak and stopped eating.

Applejack and Rarity stopped what they were doing and watched Twilight in horrified fascination for a moment. Then, as one, they turned to each other.

“You still wanna complain about my manners?” Applejack asked faintly.

Rarity shook her head numbly. “…No, I think not.” She made a face and pushed her half-eaten food away from her.

Everypony’s attention was drawn from the spectacle of Twilight eating by the sound of chuckling. They turned to see Shining Armor and Cadance walking into the room together. “I see Twily’s manners are as demure as ever,” Shining quipped.

Cadance sighed and shook her head in mock-sorrow. “And to think, Rainbow Dash actually had better manners when she was a filly.”

Suddenly aware of everypony’s focus on her, Twilight blushed and hastily wiped her muzzle clean with the back of her hoof. “H-hey!”

“Twilight.” Pinkie’s voice was still awe-struck and full of deadly seriousness. “That was the messiest, slobbiest and most funniest way to eat that I’ve ever seen.” She took a deep breath. “Please say you’ll teach me!”

Rainbow was still a bit taken aback herself. “Geeze Twilight. Dinky made less of a mess with her first birthday cake—and she shoved her face into it!”

“For pony’s sake, I’ve seen Winona eat neater than that,” Applejack agreed. “I’ve never seen y’all do that before!”

Dash rubbed her muzzle. So she wasn’t the only pony to think that was strange. She leaned forward, eager to hear ‘Twilight’ explain herself.

Twilight blushed crimson and sank down in her seat. “I-I usually don’t! Honest! Just when I’m really, really hungry and I’m not thinking about it I kinda…” she waved a hoof limply. “…Forget myself?”

Shining snorted, walking over to muss Twilight’s mane. “Yeah, that’s my Twily. Most powerful and brilliant unicorn of her generation, top graduate from Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns, two time savior of the world … and reigning champion for Equestria’s messiest eater.” He grinned and gently pinched her cheek with his magic. “Don’t make me tell mom and dad your eating habits haven’t improved.”

“HEY!” Twilight flailed her hooves as she tried to break free. “Leggo!” Her friends held their hooves up to try to hide their chuckles at her situation while Twilight threatened dire retribution.

Rainbow settled back and watched Shining Armor and Cadance interact with Twilight. Okay, so Twilight being a slobby eater isn’t THAT unusual. Still, Shining Armor and Cadance would probably be able to spot anything wrong with Twilight before anypony else! Rainbow smiled and was about to congratulate herself on her cleverness when a niggling, doubting thought rose up. A captain of the guard and the princess of the Crystal Empire...those are important positions. She felt her eye twitch. They could have been replaced too! Darnit!

Twilight used her magic to smack her brother with her rolled up checklist until he let go. “Grr…just for that, Shiny, I’m gonna make sure your dress uniform itches and is too tight.”

“Not seeing a downside to that.” Cadance smirked.

“I can help adjust his uniform!” Rarity volunteered quickly. Then she coughed and quickly added, “For…hm, fashion purposes and…things.”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Much as I’d like to see y’all making foals of yourselves, I have a big day tomorrow; gotta get things set up in the kitchen.”

“I need to make sure my birds are well rested.” Fluttershy chimed in. “They must be so tired from the long trip to Canterlot.”

“And I have to make sure to set my party cannon to the ‘Grand Galloping Gala/Royal Canterlot Wedding setting.’” Pinkie nodded. “Don’t wanna get the confetti and the batter mixed up. Again … again.”

Shining Armor furrowed his brow. “Party … cannon?”

“Don’t ask.” Twilight sighed as she ran a hoof through her mane. “Just…don’t. So, I guess I’ll see you all in the morning,” she looked to her friends. “I’m going to spend the night at home with my family.”

“Aww, that sounds super nice!” Pinkie Pie nodded. “Tell your mom and dad I say hi! They know who I am right?”

A bemused smile worked its way onto Twilight’s muzzle. “Yes, Pinkie, they know who you are. We’ll meet for breakfast and then split up. I’ll make my way around to each of you with my checklist!” She clapped her hooves together excitedly.

Rainbow started to think of a plan. It was still only half-formed when she blurted out, “Hey, Twilight! Mind if I hang with you and your family tonight?”

Twilight gasped gleefully. “Ohmygosh, you want to come over to my house?!” She danced up and down gleefully. “I’ve never had a friend over to my house for a sleepover before! This is going to be so much fun! We can do all the things in my book that we didn’t get to do on the train to the Crystal Empire!”

Cadance smiled. “Aww, that sounds like a wonderful idea.”

“Gotta admit, that does amusing,” Shining teased. “Just try not to pig out on ice cream and cookie dough. And don’t keep mom and dad awake with all your gossipping and girly stuff.”

Rainbow Dash glared daggers at him. “All in favor of spending the night swapping Shiny stories?”

“Seconded.” Twilight snorted. “All opposed?”

Realizing the hole he’d dug himself into, Shining raised a hoof. “Uh, neigh?”

“Two against one Shiney Hiney,” Dash snerked. “You done goofed.”

Twilight grinned as she began pulling Rainbow Dash towards the door. “Sorry I can’t invite you all over.” She said to her friends. “Maybe once we’re back in Ponyville I can schedule something.” Turning back to Dash her eyes lit up. “Ooh! We can do makeovers this time, right? Please, please please please?”

Dash bit her lip and plastered a smile on her face as she realized that in the best case scenario, she had just agreed to spend the night with Twilight geeking out in her obsessive compulsive way about the by-the-book way to do a sleepover. And in the worst case scenario, she just agreed to sleep under the same roof--ponyfeathers, the same room--as a changeling!

Either way, she wasn’t about to get any sleep tonight. It was moments like these that made Rainbow wish she thought things through before she said them aloud.

Chapter 3

A little while later found Rainbow Dash casually leaning against a wall as she watched Twilight dig under her bed. “You sure your parents won’t mind me just showing up?”

Twilight shook her head. Or at least, Rainbow assumed she had shaken her head since she got no immediate answer. There was a pause as Rainbow guessed that Twilight had realized that being halfway underneath the bed made shaking her head a pointless gesture. “It’s not a problem.” Twilight piped up. “Since I told them I’d be eating with you guys at the palace they went out for dinner. And the rest of my family won’t be coming in for the wedding for a few more days.”

Rainbow made a neutral noise as she waited for Twilight to finish rummaging around. Twilight’s tail flicked happily as she let out a joyful “Aha! Found it!” Wriggling out from under her bed, Rainbow saw that Twilight had found and pulled out an old inflatable mattress. “This is perfect! I used to have this so Shining Armor could sleep in my room whenever I…” she trailed off slightly as she looked to Rainbow Dash.

“What is it?” Rainbow asked, curious.

Twilight bit her lip as she held the mattress to her. “…whenever I got scared at night.” She admitted. “When I was little, I mean. I’d go over to Shining’s room and ask him to spend the night with me. And he’d bring his camping mattress and, well, just sort of left it here.” She shot Rainbow a small, weak smile. “I guess not all of us can be as brave as you.”

“Aw, Twilight,” Dash reached out to her … only to flinch and hesitate at the last moment. “You’re … you’re an awesome pony.” Her voice wavered, sounding uncertain. This changeling business sucks!

Twilight’s ears flattened against her head, picking up on how Rainbow Dash couldn’t make her reassurances sound convincing. “If—if you say so.” She sighed, setting the mattress down and using her magic to inflate it.

Feeling awkward and uncertain of herself—How do you comfort somepony when you don’t know if it’s really them?—Rainbow looked around the room.

It was about what she would have expected for Twilight’s room to be like: simple, plain and organized. Meticulously organized. There were book shelves along the walls that were all crammed full of books. Shelves were stacked with prizes and awards for achievements in science and magic and other stuff that Rainbow Dash didn’t think they even gave trophies for.

She idly began walking past the shelves, looking at some of the books. Twilight looked over. “Oh my gosh, I am so sorry about the mess!” She hurried over, horn glowing as she pulled some books off the shelf and started rearranging them. “I know it’s such a sty! Sometimes my parents have somepony come in to clean and she never puts the books back in quite the right place, even though they’re all labeled and organized according to the Royal Library standard—though sometimes Mom comes in when I’m away and rearranges them with Dewey Decimal system even though I’ve asked her not to and—”

“Geeze, Twilight relax! It’s fine!” Rainbow held up her hooves. “Your room is neat and clean…I think it’s even cleaner than my room. And it’s made of clouds!”

Twilight stopped. “Oh, right.” She let out a weak giggle. “Sorry about that. Just … want everything to be just right, you know? After all, I haven't had a friend over at my place in ... ever.”

Dash sat down on her now inflated mattress. “It’s cool, just … try to relax a bit. I mean, we’re here to have fun right?” How Rainbow managed to say that with a straight face, she never knew.

“Right!” Twilight perked back up as she pulled a book off the shelf. “And I have a copy of Slumber 101: All You Ever Wanted to Know About Slumber Parties But Were Afraid to Ask here!” She magically flipped through the pages. “Since last time it was the eight of us and we were heading to the Crystal Empire to deal with Sombra, we didn’t get to do everything in the book. But since it’s just you and me tonight…ooh! We can start with the make-overs!”

I instantly regret this plan. Rainbow gulped.

Twilight’s hooves danced up and down on the floor. “I can’t wait! We can have a real, by the book sleepover this time! We can do everything on the list and you can meet my parents and share stories about Shining Armor and--”

Dash forced a smile onto her face and mumbled distractedly. “That sounds great … Really, really great.” The prospect of (possibly) spending a night with a changeling left her on edge and she was so distracted that she didn’t notice the hurt look on Twilight’s face.

It didn’t last long though, as Twilight’s mood brightened when she heard the sound of voices and a door opening. “That’s my parents! Come on, I’ll introduce you!”

Rainbow quickly thought that this was her chance to do some looking around … what she expected a Twilight-changeling to leave in Twilight’s room was another story, but it she had start somewhere. “You go say hi, I’ll, er be down in a second. Just want to…um…” she patted the mattress. “Make sure the mattress isn’t too lumpy!”

“O-okay.” Twilight’s eyes looked downcast for a moment. Rainbow Dash realized that if Twilight wasn’t a changeling, then she’d just been keeping her distance and acting weird around one of her best friends for no reason. I really hate all this horseapples.

After a murmured, ‘be right back’ Twilight headed down to see her parents. Rainbow looked around for any signs or clues that could be used to tell if Twilight was actually her or not.

As soon as she was gone, Rainbow got up and started looked around. She walked around the room, subjecting everything to her critical eyes. She started with the books on Twilight’s shelves. Most of them had long, boring titles--usually alliterative--or else used words that Dash didn’t think she could pronounce without a week’s practice. As for the others...Why would anypony need that many books about Starswirl the Bearded? Getting on stalker territory there, Twi…Rainbow thought to herself. She remembered that Starswirl was one of the most powerful and important unicorns when it came to spellcasting and the like. And nopony was into all things Starswirl as much as Twilight. If the changelings needed to know something about magic, Twilight would be the pony to pick. She reasoned.

Rainbow kept looking around--finding it curious that such an introverted, well, egghead like Twilight would have the entire Daring Do series. Hay, that was one of the few things Rainbow Dash regularly read herself. Princess Celestia had tried to get her more interested in reading and had introduced her to the series (albeit after much prodding).

Continuing on, she went over to Twilight’s desk and started opening the drawers and rummaging around. There wasn’t much in there. Just inkwells and quills and parchment…lots of them. Spying a small blue book in the back corner, Rainbow pulled it out, thinking that it might be a clue. Wonder what this could be…

“Rainbow Dash!” The sudden shout from the doorway made her fumble with the book, only narrowly managing to catch it before it hit the ground. She whirled around to see Twilight standing in the doorway. “Give me back my diary!”

Diary? Rainbow looked down at the small blue book in her hooves, just now noticing the large purple star on the cover, a dead-ringer for Twilight’s cutie mark. “Oh, sorry I was just—” a sudden peal of laughter from Twilight cut her off. “Uh, Twilight?”

“S-sorry!” Twilight giggled, trying to cover her mouth with a hoof. “It’s just—you activated the enchantment I put on it!” She pointed to the mirror on her wall. Rainbow trotted over…and saw her own face covered with clown-make up. “I did warn you…”

“Gyah! Get it off!” Dash yelped, rubbing a hoof over her face.

Twilight tapped her muzzle, thinking about it. “I don’t know--I mean, I want my parents to make sure they remember you…”

“Twilight!” Rainbow groaned. “You wouldn’t!”

“…Okay, I guess not.” Twilight snerked. “But it would’ve served you right for snooping around.” Her horn lit up and removed the make-up (with Rainbow Dash checking the mirror for herself to make sure). “Now are you ready to meet my parents?”

“Sure, lead the way.” Rainbow nodded. Twilight grinned happily and trotted down the stairs. Rainbow followed her into the kitchen where two ponies—a stallion with a blue coat and mare with a white coat—sat waiting for them.

“Mom? Dad?” Twilight nodded to them. “This is my friend, Rainbow Dash. Rainbow, these are my parents—Twilight Velvet and Night Light.”

Rainbow gave the two a small smile and wave. “Hey. What’s up?”

Twilight Velvet smiled as she got up and bustled the two into their own seats at the table. “Oh, so you’re Rainbow Dash! We’ve heard so much about you!”

“Yeah?” Dash smirked. “I’m not surprised.”

Twilight groaned and rolled her eyes. “Mom, she just ate. You don’t have to feed her ego.”

But her mother simply waved Twilight off. “Oh really, Twilight—we’ve been hearing Rainbow stories ever since Shining was posted to the palace! And your letters about her—”

“Letters?” Rainbow tilted her head.

Night Light nodded. “Ever since she moved to Ponyville, Twilight’s been sending letters all about her new life in Ponyville. The library, her adventures, her friends...you’re mentioned quite a bit, actually.”

“Heh, yeah?” Rainbow looked at Twilight, who blushed and rubbed her head sheepishly.

“It’s kind of exciting to have friends.” She shifted in her seat. “I mean, there was Shining and Cadance but…never anypony my own age. Plus I’m out on my own and, well, I just like being able to share just how wonderful it all is with them.”

Rainbow Dash offered her a grin. “Hey, I get you. It’s been pretty awesome settling in Ponyville with you and the gals.”

A sudden sigh drew their attention to Velvet. “Shining Armor’s getting married and my little Twily’s out on her own…my babies are all growing up. Where did the time go?” Her eyes glimmered with unshed tears as she went over to nuzzle Twilight’s cheek.

“Mooom, you’re embarrassing me.” Twilight giggled as she nuzzled her back. “It’s not like I moved to San Franciscolt or Saddle Arabia.”

“Quit back talking to your poor old mom and hug her.” Velvet smiled through her tears as the two Twilights hugged. Night Light went over and gently rubbed their shoulders.

Rainbow Dash felt like she was intruding in a family moment. It was awkward. She hated awkward.

After noticing her squirming a bit, Night Light smiled at her. He winked and looked to Twilight Velvet. “Honey? Do you think you could take Twilight? I’m sure Rainbow would love to look over some family photo albums.”

Velvet’s eyes lit up. “That’s a wonderful idea! Oh the memories…I should get Shining Armor an album of his own for his new family.” She nudged Twilight. “You know, if your brother can find the time to get married…”

“Mooom!” Twilight moaned.

But her mother just ignored her protestation. “Come on, you can help me find our old photo albums. Don’t you want Rainbow Dash to see all your perfect final exams?” Velvet announced with cheer as she trotted out of the kitchen. A suddenly panicked looking Twilight hurried after her.

Night Light chuckled once the two had gone. “She’s one of a kind, our little Twilight.” He turned to Dash. “I wanted to talk to you alone for moment.” He cleared this throat. “This isn’t exactly easy for me to say…”

“…What is it?” Rainbow tilted her head. Is there something about Twilight he noticed that was off?

Night Light took a deep breath. “We—Velvet and I—we wanted to thank you for all you’ve done for Twilight … for being her friend.” He looked to the door where Twilight and her mother had just exited through. “Twilight’s a special pony. I know every father says that about their child, but it’s true.” He sighed. “We were worried about her for a long time. She was always so afraid…of other ponies, of her abilities and of herself.” He rubbed his face. “She shut herself away from the world and…it hurt. Seeing her so damaged and being unable help … what you and your friends have done for her is truly amazing.” He reached out and put a hoof on her shoulder. “She has friends now. She has a life. She’s out there and happy and…we’re incredibly grateful for that. I just wish there was more I could say than ‘thank you’ but…there it is. Thank you. So much…”

Rainbow felt the heat rise to her cheeks as she struggled to maintain her cool. “Hey, Twilight’s pretty awesome. All we did was…let her be her own awesome self without worrying about the other stuff.”

“Regardless of what you think you did or didn’t do, we’re still grateful.” Night Light patted her shoulder. “We were scared out of our minds when we heard of what happened in Ponyville, with Nightmare Moon. The thought of Twilight being in the thick of that--well, you can imagine. I bet your own parents were worried about you too.”

That made Dash fidget in place. After she told her parents about the Nightmare Moon stuff, they had practically flipped out. Her dad had to be pried off her with a crowbar and her mom had wanted to deck Celestia in the nose for not dealing with it herself. It was embarrassing. Eventually they came realize that her awesomeness meant that she would have to deal with world threatening situations from time to time. It was just part of being a hero and stuff.

But Rainbow realized that not everypony’s parents would be as cool with that stuff as hers. Not everypony could be Rainbow Dash, of course.

Night Light went on. “And when we heard that she wanted to move to Ponyville after all that--well, were pretty hesitant to say the least. But she was so determined to be with her new friends that...we realized we couldn’t make her choose between us and you. We were on edge the entire time you went up the stop King Sombra. As dangerous and as scary as it was--for her and for us--Twilight made it through. And she grew and became a better pony for it. As much as her mother and I may not like it, adventure and danger is part of her life now.” He paused. “I--I know it’s as dangerous for you and the others as it is for Twilight, but I want to ask you...please, keep her safe?”

“Always.” The answer was out of Rainbow’s mouth before she could even think about it. She would do anything for her friends...and now Twilight’s parents were pretty much asking her to make sure their daughter stayed safe. And even as they spoke, Twilight could be locked up in a cocoon somewhere and have a love-eating bug taking her place, sleeping in her bed and hugging her parents. And even if it wasn’t Twilight, it could be any one of her other friends, all of whom had families and loved ones too.

Dash’s eyes flashed with resolve. I am going to find that bug. Nopony is taking MY friend away from me--or their families!

“Thank you,” Night Light sagged in relief. “You have no idea how much that helps me feel better, knowing that you’re watching out for her.” He chuckled. “It’s funny, when Twilight was younger and still afraid, Shining Armor would tell her a story of some outrageous thing you’ve done. He’d then tell her, ‘The next time you’re afraid, just ask yourself: what would Rainbow Dash do?’”

Dash snorted. “That’s rich. Whenever I ended up getting into trouble, he’d tell me all about his super-clever sister and how I should try to think ahead like she would. Hay, Twilight’s now my tutor and stuff.”

“I heard.” Night Light laughed. “Twilight was ecstatic to be teaching somepony…even if she is a stubborn, athletic-oriented class clown.” Rainbow grinned sheepishly. Night Light just chuckled as he got up and went around the table to give her a hug. “My kids think of you as practically another sister. You’re always welcome in our home.”

“T-thanks.” Rainbow swallowed. “I--thank you.”

She was saved from any mushy display by Twilight’s mother choosing that moment to poke her head back into the kitchen, a photo album clutched in her magical grip. “Come on you two, we found the photo album! Did you know that Twilight won the science fair every year starting from Magical Kindergarten?” She flipped open the album and directed Rainbow Dash’s gaze to a young Twilight proudly holding up a blue ribbon.

Twilight groaned dramatically from someplace behind her. “Mom.”

“Hey,” Rainbow smirked. “You got to see mine when you visited Cloudsdale. Consider us even.”

That prompted a grumble from Twilight. “You’re not getting first dibs on smores, then.”

“Isn’t this fun?”

Rainbow sighed as Twilight smeared goop across her face. “Ecstatic.”

“Come on, Rainbow…” a faint whine worked its way into Twilight’s voice. “You said we’d do everything by the book this time!”

“Yeah, yeah…” Dash sighed. I’m an idiot. Been here two hours, gotten my face glopped on and I still have no idea if this is Twilight or not. What a waste of time.

Twilight’s shoulders slumped a bit. “I guess we don’t have to…if you really don’t want to.”

Rainbow Dash was about to agree in a heartbeat when she saw the sad look on Twilight’s face. “It’s not—the sleepover book is fine. I just … kinda got a lot on my mind, you know?”

“Well … do you wanna talk about it?” Twilight asked, grabbing a mane brush with her magic and getting to work on Rainbow’s mane.

Rainbow winced…though that might have been due to the knots in her hair. “Yeah, I guess. S’just…so much stuff is going on.”

“Like the Gala Wedding?” Twilight offered, tugging at the brush. “It is a pretty big deal—I mean, I’m gonna have an in-law! A sister-in-law!” A giddy squeal escaped Twilight’s muzzle, prompting an amused chuckle from Rainbow. Twilight caught herself and sheepishly got back to the brushing. “Aren’t you excited?”

Rainbow nodded faintly. “Oh yeah, I‘m excited for Shiny and Cadey. It’s just--kind of a big change. I mean wasn’t that long ago that I was dropping water balloons on Shiney’s head and leaving stinkbombs in his armor.”

Twilight chuckled. “You did have an interesting way of expressing your crush on him.”

Dash rolled her eyes, trying—and failing—not to blush. “Yeah, yeah…whatever. Gotta be a big thing for you too. Isn’t he staying with Cadance in the Crystal Empire after they get hitched?”

“Yeah…” The unicorn deflated slightly. “I’m really going to miss him. Until I met you and the others, he was my only real friend. And I’ve been so busy settling into Ponyville that I haven’t seen him as much as I wanted to—especially since he stayed to help Cadance in the Crystal Empire. With them getting married…I guess I’ll only get to see him on visits.” Her ears flattened against her head and she sniffled slightly. “S-sorry. This was supposed to be a fun night and instead—”

“Hey.” Rainbow gave her a hug. “It’s okay. I’m going to miss Shiny Hiney too, you know?”

Twilight nodded. “I know.” She sighed. “It’s so…I don't even know what the word is for it. I love Cadance and I’m so happy that they’re going to be getting married. At the same time … I feel like I’m not going to be as important to Shining Armor as I used to be. Getting married is…it’s big. I mean, he and Cadance are going to have kids someday. A family of their own and I’m—I’m…”

“His super awesome sister.” Rainbow draped a wing across her back, hesitating only a second before she pulled Twilight close. “That’s not going to change.”

“But everything else is...and I’m scared.” She gave a weak, half-bitter laugh. “I know, that’s just a surprise isn’t it? Twilight Sparkle being scared and lame.” Twilight leaned against Rainbow Dash. “I wish I could be brave and adventurous like you, instead of being such a lame, scaredy-pony”

Rainbow frowned. “Hey, whoa, no. Just no. You are anything but lame. Or a scaredy-pony. A lame pony would never be the Element of Magic. A scaredy-pony would never have come to stop Nightmare Moon or Sombra. You. Are. Awesome. And I know awesome.” She puffed herself up and gave her mane an arrogant little toss that succeeded in getting Twilight to crack a smile. She decided to keep going with it. “I mean, I’m an expert on awesome. I have a degree in awesomeness.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Uh huh. Gee, maybe I should go for a degree in awesomeness too. Followed by a Master’s Degree in radicalness and a PhD in coolness.”

“Couldn’t hurt!” Rainbow put in, rubbing her chest with a hoof. “I’ll teach you everything I know.”

“That won’t take long!” Twilight blurted out before collapsing into giggles. “Thank you, Rainbow…” The slumber party book floated over and she started to flip through the pages. “Ooh! Next up is making smores! Can’t fall behind schedule!”

Rainbow Dash snorted and rolled her eyes. The things I do for friends. As Twilight consulted her book on the proper way to built smores, Rainbow thought more about ways to determine if Twilight was a changeling. “So, uh Twilight, what’re you going to do for the Gala Wedding?”

“Hmm? Give me a minute.” Twilight finished putting together another smore, making sure there was an even dozen before turning back to Dash. “Well, since I’m overseeing the organizing of the wedding, I figured I’d go around and see how our friends are doing getting things ready.” Her horn glimmered and a checklist floated over. “I’m going to make sure Shining Armor and Cadance have the best wedding ever! I’ve got charts and diagrams and a dozen different plans for the seating charts and--”

“Whoah, Twilight—chill!” Rainbow held up her hooves. “I get it, it’s going to be a great wedding.”

Twilight shook her head. “Great? Nonono, it has to be absolutely perfect! There will be delegates and high-ranking ponies from all over Equestria coming: from the Crystal Empire, Maretonia, Saddle Arabia…everypony’s going to be watching!” A panicked expression crossed her face. “What if something goes wrong? A chair is out of place or one of the guests has an allergy to the cake? What if some of the visitors get upset? It could cause a political disaster! Delegates would feel insulted and that would cause fledgling trade agreements to crumble leaving the Crystal Empire destitute and ponies begging from begging beggars for daisy sandwiches! Worse! Cadance and Shining Armor’s wedding would be ruined!” Her breath started to come out in bursts and hitches. “They love each other so much and I want them to be happy together! But if some important pony has a bad time because of their wedding that might cause stress on their relationship! Maybe even ruin their marriage and it would be All. My. Fault!”

Rainbow leaned back, almost physically forced away by the force of panic Twilight was giving off. “Whoa, whoa whoa!” She grabbed Twilight by the shoulders. “Twilight, relax! Breathe!”

Twilight panted. “Right, breathing. I can do that.” She took a few gulps of air. “Sorry…”

“You gotta learn to relax more,” Rainbow patted her back—secretly trying to feel if she could feel a bug shell beneath her coat. “It’s not the end of the world if somepony thinks the drinks are too warm or whatever.”

“I know, I know.” Twilight sighed. “I just—I don’t like leaving things to chance. You never know what might happen.”

“You mean like turning your parents into house plants?” Rainbow asked. A pained wince and a whimper from Twilight was enough to make Dash want to bonk herself on the head later. “I’m sorry, didn’t mean it like that. But that was an accident. You know, not your fault? You don’t have to become this…totally buttoned up, obsessive compulsive control freak out of fear of what might happen. We’ve talked about this.” She narrowed her eyes a bit as she thought about that.

Twilight nodded faintly. “I know we did, and you were right. But…I still feel that way sometimes. What if my focus slips and somepony gets hurt? Mom and Dad…Shining Armor and Cadance…” she looked over at Dash and bit her lip. “You and the girls? I don’t know how I’d be able to live with myself if something like that ever happened.”

Rainbow nudged her gently. “Hey. Nothing like that is going to happen, I promise you. Now instead of working yourself into a tizzy over it, how about if we work on making this sleepover the best one ever?” She grinned. “Think of it as practice for making the Gala Wedding the best one ever.”

Her suggestion seemed to work as Twilight brightened and consulted her slumber party book again. When her focus was away, Rainbow Dash rubbed her face. Think brain, think think think! How do you tell if your friend is really your friend or just a really clever shapeshifting, love-eating bug impersonating your friend?

Twilight was nervous and on-edge about making sure the wedding came off perfectly … which was pretty Twilight-like. She cared about making her friends and family happy and her way about making sure it happened was to plan it out as much as possible.

On the other hoof, if she were an evil bug trying to take over Equestria, she’d want to make sure everything went exactly as planned too. And the wedding planner would make an ideal pony to replace—they’d know how many ponies were coming, where they’d be, and was in charge of everything.

Dash reached out, wondering if there was some way she could ‘feel’ the changeling underneath the disguise. She gently poked Twilight in the side. The unicorn’s ear flicked, but otherwise took no real notice. Dash poked her again, and once more after that. Still nothing. Hmm… I got it! Her eyes lit up. Maybe I can surprise or startle her into dropping the act!

Rainbow Dash crouched down into a pounce and leapt onto the unsuspecting Twilight. “GYAH! Rainbow Dash w-what are you—hahaa—stoppit!” She squealed as Rainbow began mercilessly tickling her with her wings. “Cut it out!” Her horn lit up and she teleported away, reappearing on her bed. “You asked for it!”

Success! Rainbow patted herself on the back. She’d caught the changeling off-guard and she was about to drop her disguise to attack her! Now she just had to ready herself to handle whatever assault was going to be sent her way and then she could bring the fake in to the Princess! Rainbow Dash you are a gen—“OOF!” Her train of thought was abruptly derailed as a magically-launched pillow struck her in the face.

“Chaaarge!” Twilight shouted as she leapt off her bed, flailing with another pillow clutched in her hooves and two more in her magical grip. Rainbow was buffeted and bopped with fluffy pillows of doom.

Curses. Foiled again. Rainbow quickly grabbed the pillow she’d been hit with and began swinging at Twilight, hoping she could at least find out how changelings carried themselves in a fight…before realizing that she was trying to analyze battle tactics during a pillow fight. I may have to rethink how I investigate this whole changeling business. Still, there was no need to take a dive during a pillow fight--regardless of whether she was fighting a changeling or Twilight.

Rainbow Dash rubbed her head, looking around for more ammunition. Her eyes lingered on a small lump on a bedside table. “Hey, what’s this?” She lifted it up, realizing that it was a small, ragdoll.

Twilight looked over and blinked. “Smarty Pants!” She trotted over and gently took the doll out of Rainbow’s hooves, hugging it close to her chest. “I’ve had her since I was a filly, my very first study buddy. Look!” She showed her to Dash. “She even has a little quill and notebook so you can pretend she’s doing her homework with you!” A faint blush crossed her cheeks. “I know that’s not really your thing…”

Not even a little, Rainbow rolled her eyes slightly.

“…but she used to keep me company whenever I was alone. I’ve had her as long as I can remember and—she was my first friend, after Shining Armor.” Twilight hugged her close. “I used to sleep with her every night so I’d never have to be alone.”

Rainbow tilted her head. “If Smarty Pants is so important to you, why didn’t you bring it with you when you moved to Ponyville?”

“I meant to ask my parents to mail her…but I never got around to it.” Twilight shuffled. “I guess I felt like I didn’t need her as much now that I was older and had some real friends.” She smiled faintly at Rainbow. “I guess, you and the others became my new Smarty Pants.”

Dash quirked a brow at that, looking at the flop-eared doll critically. “Uh-huh…so,” she grinned wryly. “You’re calling me a smarty pants, huh? Does that mean I’m a smart dresser or that I’m smarter than you now?” She settled back. “I guess this means you don’t need to tutor me anymore.”

Twilight snorted. “Yeah, right. Nice try, Rainbow.” She hugged the doll to her face and giggled. “Heh. I remember one time when my bags and Shining’s got mixed up and he had to explain to his commanding officers and his fellow cadets why he had Smarty Pants in his stuff!” The two laughed and started swapping Shining Armor stories. Like the time Shining Armor first tried to ask Cadance out on a date … only to choke and ask her where she bought her perfume because he wanted it too. There was also the time he played an Oubliettes and Ogres marathon so long that he became sleep deprived started to claim that ogres had stolen his homework.

Then Twilight consulted her list. “Since we’re trading stories--why not have Truth or Dare now?”

Rainbow Dash’s eyes lit up. That sounded like the perfect way to get some more information out of Twilight, if that’s who she really was. “Sure! I’ll go first. Truth or Dare?”

“I’m going to say truth.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I don’t need you daring me to interrupt my brother’s wedding by loudly proclaiming my love for Cadance.”

...Okay so she knows me pretty well. “Yeah, yeah...so! Here’s your question: do you like bugs?”

“Bugs?” Twilight pulled a face. “No, why would you even think that I would?”

Because you might be a giant love eating locust. “No reason. I just bet that an egghead like you would’ve gone around as a kid with a big book of bugs, trying to identify all the different types of, well, bugs.”

“Not really,” Twilight shook her head. “Entomology is fascinating, don’t get me wrong. But I never felt any strong need to let bugs get under my coat and in my mane…with their, creepy, crawly and way too many legs.” She shuddered. “I once blew out a wall of the house because I saw a spider crawling up it.”

“Huh, okay.” Rainbow sat back. That story, while funny, didn’t help her mission any. Unless of course, changelings were afraid of spiders. “Your turn.”

“Truth or Dare?”

“Truth.” Rainbow shrugged, not really caring much about the game. When she looked back up at Twilight, she saw her looking concerned. Am I getting too close to the truth?

“Rainbow Dash, is something wrong?” Twilight asked. “And yes, that’s your question. You’ve been acting strangely all night and I want to know if something is bothering you.” She raised a hoof to forestall any objections from the cyan pegasus before they could be made. “You’ve been quiet, passive and switching between being really close and supportive and keeping your distance.” Her face softened. “I’m your friend, Rainbow. I want to help you the way you’ve helped me.”

Rainbow Dash took a deep breath. “Okay...the truth is--the truth is…maybe Shiny getting married is still bugging me a little.” It took all of her willpower not to wince at the deceit. She’d gotten over her issues with Shining Armor and Cadance back during their trek to the frozen north. But she couldn’t tell Twilight the real reason she was upset, and it bothered her to no end.

I know honesty is more Applebutt's thing, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with lying to my friends.

The worst part was the look of total and complete understanding on Twilight’s face. “Oh Rainbow,” she reached out and put a hoof on Dash’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Really.” Her awkwardness was only heightened when Twilight hugged her.

Twilight held her until she returned the embrace. “I know this is difficult. But like you told me, just because Shining Armor is marrying Cadance doesn’t mean he cares and less about me--or you. You’ll always be special to him, okay?”

Rainbow noded. “Yeah, okay. Thanks Twilight.” She cleared her throat. “So, uh since that was your question, it’s might turn again. So, truth or dare?”

After that they went another round or two, but it quickly petered out. Turns out that having only two players made the game kinda lame. Rainbow was fine with letting the game end, despite not being crowned the winner. The rest of the game hadn’t given her any answers and in hindsight asking Twilight if she’d liked bugs was a really dumb way to see if she was a changeling.

Rainbow Dash was trying to think of her next move when Twilight yawned suddenly. “Oooghh, sorry. It’s late. Maybe we should turn in.”

“Sounds like a plan. I could use some shut-eye.” Dash stretched, joints popping. “G’night Twilight.”

“Good night, Rainbow Dash.” Twilight returned as she got onto her bed. She gave Rainbow a smile. “Pleasant dreams, Rainbow. Don’t let the bedbugs bite!”

Dash tensed suddenly as the lights went out, waiting for an attack that could come at any second, from any direction. Even when after a minute passed, then another, then five more, she didn’t relax.

Rainbow Dash, champion napper of Cloudsdale, Canterlot and Ponyville lay on her back, staring up at the ceiling as sleep eluded her. I’m really not cut out for this investigation horseapples. I hate all this sneaking around and trying to be subtle. Not trusting my best friends blows. I’d do anything for them—but if they’re not them, then—Gyah! She turned over and buried her face into her pillow, trying to repress a scream of frustration.

So just who is that? One of my best friends, who I’d do anything for—or a changeling out to replace me as I sleep?

Twilight might not have told any really scary stories, but Rainbow Dash still wasn’t going to get any sleep that night.

Chapter 4

Rainbow Dash was hard-pressed to remember a more unpleasant night. She spent the virtually the whole night awake and on-edge to be attacked, only for it to never come. Occasionally, despite herself, she would drift off for three or four minutes before rousing herself by remembering the supposedly imminent changeling threat.

Twilight of course, slept like a filly and woke up bright, cheery and perky with nothing worse than bedmane. Sometimes, I can really hate my friends, Dash darkly thought to herself.

“Everything okay, Rainbow?” Twilight asked as they sat down to breakfast. “Didn’t get enough sleep? I’m sorry if any of my ghost stories scared you--”

Dash rolled her bloodshot eyes. Twilight’s stories were about as scary as a half-eaten turnip. She had no sense of style or presentation. But since she couldn’t come out and tell Twilight that she thought she was a bug monster, Rainbow just grunted and dug a fork into her pancakes (which, she had to admit, were bucking delicious).

After breakfast, she and Twilight went their separate ways. Twilight went to do some organizational stuff or something, and Rainbow flew back to the castle. I need to talk to Princess Celestia. She’s gotta give me something more to work with… Dash landed on the balcony outside Celestia’s room, where she raised the sun from. She trotted in to see the Princess speaking to one of her aides, a white pony with brown hair in a high bun. After waiting patiently for all of two minutes, Rainbow cleared her throat to get her attention. “Uh, Celestia? I need to talk to you about—” she tilted her head to Raven “—the thing,” She finished, pleased with herself for being so circumspect.

“If you’ll excuse me, Raven…” Celestia flicked a wing toward Rainbow. After waiting for Raven to bow and back out of the room, the two met. “What is it?”

Rainbow coughed. “Well, I was wondering if you had any luck in finding the changelings lurking around. Not that I haven’t, of course, it’s just that—well, I wouldn’t mind if I had a better idea of where to look or something.”

Celestia nodded. “I understand. I know this is no easy task for you, but with the menace right on our doorstep, there are few whom I can still trust.” She looked worriedly out her window. “I decided to take a chance and sent a courier with a sealed message for Luna, asking her to return with her guards.”

“That’s great!” Dash sighed in relief. “So as soon as she gets here, she can find out who’s a changeling and who’s not?”

“I can only hope.” Celestia looked tired herself, rubbing at her eyes. “Forgive me. I fear my own efforts have been as draining as yours.”

Rainbow yawned, seeing Celestia tired made her feel even more tired too. “Yeah, I guess so. What do you want me to do?”

“It may take several days for Luna and her force to return. In the meantime, I want you to continue your own search for the changeling among your friends.”

Rainbow nodded. “Right.” Her face fell somewhat. “Are you absolutely sure that one of them is—”

“A changeling?” Celestia finished for her. “I am as certain as I can be. It would be inconceivable for Chrysalis to make a move against Canterlot without inserting an agent to monitor and neutralize the elements first. The six of you, together, are an unstoppable force. With even one of you out of the way…”

“I get it.” Rainbow sighed, rubbing her face. “I guess—I just really hoped you were wrong, you know? No offense.”

She soon found herself enveloped in a large white wing. “None taken,” Celestia gave her a gentle squeeze. “I witnessed a changeling infiltration once before. Their methods are … precise, methodical. Chrysalis, like many beings who live longer than ponies, tends to fall into a consistent pattern of conduct. The signs of a changeling infiltration, now that I know what to look for, are all around.”

“You saw it happen before?” Rainbow asked. “Where, what happened? How’d they get stopped?”

Celestia sighed and dipped her head. “It was not long after Luna’s banishment. A few decades, perhaps. They slowly encroached upon a series of border towns and outposts, replacing key figures: mayors, militia leaders, couriers and the like.”

“Why not just replace everypony?” Dash wondered. “I mean, if there are enough of them to be a problem here and now, they must’ve been enough to take over some little village or whatever.”

“They did not replace everypony because there was no need to.” Celestia explained. “Remember, Changelings feed upon their victims love. If all of them were replaced there would be none left for them to feed on. And if they did replace every single pony in a village, what would that gain them? They would have to keep up the charade of normalcy, effectively draining a portion of their strength to make sure nopony came across the town and realized that its inhabitants were missing.” Celestia frowned. “Changelings are precise, methodical by nature. They commit precisely as many resources as they feel they need to a task and no more.”

Rainbow nodded faintly. “And these border towns? What happened?”

“Luck favored us. A single pony saw the changelings taking their victims to an abandoned mine. He fled across the desert, alerting the authorities of the first town he entered. Eventually, word reached my ears and a force was dispatched. The changelings were repulsed and the townsponies freed.”

“That’s good.” Rainbow let her shoulders slump a bit in relief. “We beat ‘em before, we can do it again.”

Celestia chuckled. “Well said.” However, her good mood didn’t last long. “Unfortunately, given our past experiences with them, as well as their predilection for inserting themselves into our defenses, I can only conclude that they have indeed infiltrated your friends. And it remains your job to find out who it is.”

Rainbow gave a nod and saluted. “I won’t let you down!”

Intent on seeing her mission through, Rainbow Dash headed down to the castle kitchens where she knew Applejack would be. As she approached she spotted a number of ponies in the white aprons and hats that marked them as kitchen staff who were standing outside the kitchen doors, looking nervous or upset. Rainbow wondered what was Applejack busy cooking up.

“I’ll show you whose apples’re ‘overrated’ ya pompous, fingle-fangling, spud-loving jacakanape!” A series of crashes and clangs rang out.

Seems she’s cooking up a large order of trouble with some suspicious behavior on the side. Rainbow thought right before charging through the doors. What she burst in upon was about as nasty an argument as she’d ever seen, with Applejack squaring off against the head of the castle kitchens, Chef Ram—something or other. He was a blond pony with a beige coat. He had dual kitchen knives for a cutie mark and a tongue sharper than any utensil in Equestria.

Of course, Applejack had plenty of good ol’ down home country expressions that described the chef, his cooking and his mother in explicit detail. “HEY!” Rainbow Dash yelled at the top of her voice. “WHAT THE FEATHER IS GOING ON HERE?!”

The two started talking over one another, which helped Rainbow exactly none. “Whoa, whoa hold on!” She pointed at Applejack. “AJ, you first. What the hay?”

Applejack adjusted her hat, which had gotten off kilter during her argument and set about fixing her frazzled mane. “I was tryin’ to get to baking the cake when I found out this here sorry excuse for a kitchen didn’t have any Sweet Apple Acre apples left! And then he refused t’get any more and insulted my family’s livelihood!”

“We ran out because somepony,” the chef stressed “used them to make a bunch of low-brow, overrated snacks more suited for a family barbecue than the Grand bucking Galloping feathering Gala Royal Wedding!” He reached over and roughly grabbed a hoofull of what look like burned apple fritters. “What the buck is this! Look! Look! LOOK! What the buck is this?!” He threw them to the floor angrily. “I’m not going to turn the food for the important event in decades into cheap, low-brow hoedown fare just so a jumped-up hick farmer can try to milk the most out of it!”

“Hey!” Rainbow Dash glared at him. “Don’t insult her—”

Apparently Applejack was more offended by the characterization of her family’s cooking than the attack on her. “They ain’t low brow!” Applejack shot back. “Apple fritters are a time-honored family recipe! My fritters—

“--bring all the stallions to your yard?” Drawled the chef. “Your fritters were a marvel… overcooked on the bottom and undercooked on top. I’d rather serve dried out Diamond Dog vests!”

“Ah, shut it you fancy-shmancy ‘scuse for a fry cook!” AJ snapped back. “It’s not my fault you’re cooking gear ain’t up to snuff! The fritters kept slippin’ and sliding around!”

“You used a non-stick pan!” The chef exclaimed. “I don’t know what it means in Podunkville or wherever you’re from, but here—non-stick means non-stick!”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Y’all don’t need twenty different kinds o’ pots and thirty different kinds of pans! Shoot, none of them even have any rust on ‘em!” The chef clasped his face in his hooves and swore. The cowpony rolled her eyes. “Any chance I can get some other chef in here?” She looked to Rainbow Dash. “My Granny could out cook you this fella with three hooves tied behind her back! All I need is some good Sweet Ap—”

“Ask for apples one more time—just one more time!” The chef exploded at her, drawing himself up and red in the face with fury. “And I’ll ram them up your fat rump! And as for your Granny, she’s a—” The blistering stream of expletives that followed horrified, astounded and impressed Rainbow Dash. She mentally tried to remember some of the juicier words for future use.

Applejack’s reaction was pretty predictable. “Why you son of a—” she charged at him, only to have Rainbow Dash get between them and hold her back.

“Ease off AJ! That’s just how he is!” She grunted as she pushed and forced Applejack out of the kitchen. “Come on, let’s talk.” After she was out of the kitchen, Applejack’s rage began to subside a bit as she put up less resistance to being escorted out. The kitchen staff, glowering at Applejack, began making their way back inside.

Dash led Applejack out into the castle gardens so they could have some privacy. Applejack sighed as she sat down in the shade, trying to cool off. “Sorry y’had to see that.”

“You want to tell me what that was all about?” Rainbow tilted her head. “Just because the guy doesn’t like your apples…”

Applejack groaned. “It ain’t just that—it’s a whole lotta things.”

Rainbow sat down next to her. “Like what else?”

“Like every little darn thing!” Applejack threw up her hooves. “It’s Pinkie bouncing around the kitchen demanding more cakes and cupcakes and other sugary-things before heading out to set up the reception, leaving me to handle everything else. It’s my apple pies disappearing off the windowsill when I leave them t’cool off, but mostly? It’s this gol-dang hoity-toity, frou-frou Canterlot way of doin’ every little stinkin’ thing! S’like Rarity at dinner last night, only worse.”

“What's bugging you?” Rainbow winced and wished she had phrased that differently. Crap. Remember, Rainbow: subtlety. That was un-subtle.

If Applejack noticed—or if she was the changeling—she gave no sign. “It’s just—I’ve never baked in a place like this, y’know? They’ve got more cooks and chefs in those kitchens than I got freckles, and all of ‘em think that cuz they got some fancy education from some fancy cooking school that they all know better than me.”

Despite feeling awkward, Rainbow felt she had to ask the obvious question. “Well, do they?”

“Pssht! No!” Applejack waved her hoof dismissively. “Well, I mean maybe—yes, but that’s not the point!”

Rainbow blinked. “Uh, it kinda is…I mean, these are their kitchens.”

“I know that but … ugh!” Applejack flopped back against the grass. “I want t’make the best food that I can—and that’s not made with a hundred different sauces and spices and whatnot. We never needed all this fancy stuff t’make us happy. A good homecooked meal s’more special than the best five-star restaurant in all of Equestria. T’ain’t nothing like making somethin’ for your kin and seein’ the light in their eyes as they dig in.” Her eyes unfocused as she sat back, watching something only she could see.

After leaving her to her memories for a bit, Rainbow Dash hazarded a guess. “You’re talking about your folks, aren’t you?”

Applejack couldn’t quite repress a wince. “Yeah, I guess so.” She tugged her hat down to try to hide her face a little. “My momma…there weren’t anything like one of her home cooked meals. She didn’t have a degree or nothing but just the smell of it from a mile away could make your mouth start t’water. Never saw her burn a dish or undercook a meal. Everything was perfect. Ya could taste the love an’ work she put into it, you know?”

Rainbow Dash didn’t think she was really being asked to comment and she was right. Applejack went on. “Anytime I felt sick or I felt down ‘bout somethin’—school work bein’ too hard, bein’ too young t’applebuck proper, or even feelin’ jealous that I was gonna have a new little sister—yeah, I was kinda worried that Apple Bloom was gonna replace me,” she added, watching Dash’s face as she started pressing Rainbow’s hoof towards the table. “I wasn’t the brightest filly out there. Not like you can really talk.” She nudged her. “Anyways, whenever I was down in the dumps, she’d whip me up something special, just for me. Ah learned how t’bake by watching her. So many of mah memories of her involve her in the kitchen, making meals for the families or little treats for me. Heh, I must’ve had a bigger appetite than Big Mac.” She shot a warning look at Rainbow Dash. “Say one word about calling me ‘Ampleflanks’ and I swear I’ll buck yer sorry kiester to the moon.”

Rainbow nodded faintly, holding up her hooves placatingly. “All right, all right.” She paused as she thought about just what to say. “I’m…I’m sorry about your folks.”

Applejack sighed and nodded back at her. “Thanks. It happened a long time ago but it never really goes away.” Rainbow tentatively reached around and rested a wing across Applejack’s shoulders. “Heh, fer all yer bluster about awesomeness, yer a real sweetheart, ain’t ya?” She chuckled as their hooves remained stalemated in the center.

“You tell anypony and I’ll kick your sorry rump to the sun.” Rainbow snarked. She looked around for a moment before spotting what she was searching for. “Hey,” she nudged Applejack. “Follow me.” Rainbow pointed to a small stone table. She got up and headed over to it, Applejack getting up to follow her.

The table was a chessboard with two seats on either side. Princess Celestia had occasionally tried to get Rainbow to think more strategically by teaching her how to play. Dash considered the chess pieces for a second, then swept them off with a wave of her hoof and sat down, her right foreleg outstretched and ready for hoof-wrestling.

Applejack cracked a smile as she sat down opposite her and got ready. “On three?”

“Three.” Rainbow nodded. “Two…”

Applejack licked her lips. “One…”

“GO!”

The two pressed and strained against each other, neither one making any headway. The familiar rush of competing against each other, brought a fierce grin to both of their faces. Rainbow grunted. “Feeling better?”

“Yeah. Thanks fer this, Rainbow.” Applejack answered, seeming a bit more composed now that she had something else to focus on.

Dash gave a thin smile. “Look, I know I’m probably not the best pony to talk to about heavy, emotional stuff. But for what it’s worth, I think you’re a really cool pony. I mean, I just showed up in your trees one day, hungry and without any bits and the first thing you did was worry if I was fine and offering me a place to stay. Not a lot of ponies would do that for somepony they’d never met before.”

Applejack fidgeted sheepishly. “S’just how I was raised. Y’should be thanking my parents and the last ten generations of Apples.”

Rainbow shook her head. “I don’t think so. I mean, yeah your parents helped make you who you are but, they don’t define you. Just look at Rarity’s parents!” That won a snort out of Applejack. “So don’t go saying that everything awesome about you is just because of your family, cuz I don’t buy it. Besides, I don’t hang around you because I think your Granny is cool.”

“Nah, you just think my brother’s got a cute butt,” AJ quipped, which broke Rainbow’s focus and gave Applejack some much needed headway in their match.

Rainbow blushed and scowled at the comment and at her reversal of fortune. “Oh shut up. Here I am trying to be nice…”

The farmpony just chuckled. “Oh hesh, I’m just teasin’ ya. But thanks. It means a lot. Ah love Big Mac and Apple Bloom, but they don’t have what we have. You and me—we kinda spur each other on, don’t we? All them competitions and contests and whatnot. She inclined her head towards the table where their hoof-wrestling continued unabated. “Ain’t got many ponies I can do that with. I tried once with Rarity and—it didn’t go well.” She chuckled. “But you and me? We make each other wanna be better. So, I guess I’m saying…thanks fer being my friend.”

“Right back at you.” Rainbow nodded, focusing on the match as the momentum started to shift her way. “I think I get where you’re coming from and everything, but we’re not back at Sweet Apple Acres right now. We’re in Canterlot and this is a Royal Gala Wedding.”

Applejack was unperturbed. “You can take the filly offa the farm, but not the farm outta the filly. Sweet Apple Acres ain’t just a place—it’s a way of living, working and acting. I can’t just pretend t’be something different for the sake of someponies.” She managed to force Rainbow’s hoof back towards the center. “Remember, I tried that once as a filly—ran off to Manehattan t’get away from the farm and…and what happened to my parents.” She swallowed. “I was wrong then, and it’s wrong now. I gotta be me.”

Rainbow Dash felt like she was treading on shaky ground…which was why she usually preferred flying. “I guess, but … don’t the royal chefs and the guests have to be themselves too?”

“I was still chosen t'make the food fer the weddin'.”Applejack reminded her, pushing the advantage as Rainbow’s hoof was forced back. “I was, Rainbow, which usually means that I get t'call th'shots. Am I right or am I wrong?”

“Well, yeah, you’re right but I don’t think you can make enough food for an entire Gala Wedding by yourself, using the old fashioned Apple family way or whatever.” Rainbow grunted as she slowly started to force her hoof back up.

“Sure I can!” Applejack redoubled her efforts, sweat trickling down her face. “I've pitched in fer family reunion dinners before, so cookin' fer a large crowd ain' that hard t'figure out. It's just a matter of doin' some number-crunchin' fer a crowd this large.” She nodded determinedly.

Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash just looked at her as if she’d announced that she was going to solve Manehattan’s overcrowding problems by renting out her barn. “Um, okay. And what about making everything the Apple family way? You’re the only Apple here and you can’t make all the food yourself.” She fought Applejack’s hoof back up.

“Ya sound like those Flip Flop brothers, or whatever they called themselves.” Applejack snorted as their hooves ended up right back where they started. “Oh right, I didn’t mention them…well, apparently that Canterlot chef has at least one redeemin’ quality—he likes Apple family cider. I offered t’bring everythin’ I could but he said it wouldn’t be enough.” She snorted. “So he brought in this pair of conniving unicorn brothers who said they could make enough cider for th’ whole wedding if I used their fancy, magic-powered machine.”

“So what’s the problem?” Rainbow wondered as she slowly began to push Applejack’s hoof towards the table. “I mean, you have trouble making enough cider for Ponyville, and this is gonna be way bigger. So what's the big deal if you use these guys’ machine?”

“It ain't the right way!” Applejack stomped a hoof against the ground as she continued to lose ground. “Each mug o'cider's made with care, precision, hard work, an' more than a little love. Makin' it so…” she waved her hoof in the area as she thought of the right word, “…industrially just don' sit right. ‘Sides, them weasels want all the cider they produced t’be branded with their mugs on it, so everypony knows the cider was made with their machine—even though they’re making it with my apples!”

Rainbow flicked an ear, feeling a headache coming on. “AJ, relax. Remember where we are. There are going to be hundreds of ponies at the Gala Wedding--hundreds of high-class nobles and dignitaries and all that. You've got to remember that these are just sophisticated gentleponies. These are ponies of the parlors and salons. The upper crust of society. The elite. You know ... snobs.” That won an amused snort from Applejack, even as Rainbow continued to press her hoof back.

“Can’t you just make a deal where it says it’s made with your apples and their machine?” Dash asked, blinking away sweat. “You’re being a bit unreasonable here. Why's it so important that every piece of food be made your way, with your ingredients or whatever?”

“No, I ain’t being unreasonable!” Applejack clenched her hoof, making Rainbow wince in pain. “If they wanted frou-frou caterin' with course sizes they don't even pose a chokin' hazard, they'd've hired a frou-frou caterin' service! But they asked me! I’m here, an' I intend t'show them food snobs like that Ramsey feller what they've been missin' out on with th' best ol' country food they ain't never laid eyes on before. And I ain’t gonna compromise that by using some darn fool machine or listen t’ a bunch of cooks with a bunch o’ degrees but no heart!”

Dash groaned. Normally she would’ve won the hoof-wrestle by now and her muscles were really starting to ache. She was really starting to feel the sleep she’d missed out on. “But, you won't have enough. Don't you think you're overestimating your abilities? Maybe I could help you out in the kitchen or something? I mean, I’ve got the Rainboom down pretty solid, so--”

“You callin' me a slacker?” Applejack demanded as she pressed harder.

Rainbow winced. “What? No, I'm just saying—”

“Then I reckon yer callin’ me a liar then!” The orange earth pony stood up and threw all her bodyweight behind her forelimb, slamming Rainbow’s foreleg onto the table. Dash let out a pained yelp. Surprised and off-balance, Rainbow was knocked out of her sat and sent tumbling onto the ground, holding her forelimb in pain. Applejack lowered her hat, completely hiding her face. “I’m telling you I can handle this myself and don’t you try t’tell me that I can’t! I don’t need yer help or anypony elses!” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “Look, RD, I ain't tryin' t'be rude, but d'yew got anythin' pressin' t'deal with? I got a lot t'do, an' a lotta lunkheads t'watch an' make sure they do it right. See ya later.”

Rainbow trembled slightly as adrenaline coursed through her. “Yeah…sure. No problem.” Her voiced rang thick and hollow. Applejack just turned around and stormed off without another word, leaving Dash on the ground, clutching her foreleg. She couldn’t believe it. Applejack had just completely lost her cool and hurt her and then just...left without apologizing or offering to help. Hay, she didn’t even check to see if she was okay! Just as bad as that, Rainbow realized, Applejack stared the truth in the face…and just ran away from it.

That wasn’t the Applejack she knew. That wasn’t the Applejack who she’d met that day in Ponyville after she flew off from Canterlot.

Something was very wrong.

So, now what?

Chapter 5

Rainbow Dash rubbed her foreleg getting the feeling back into it after Applejack—or rather, Fakerjack, as she mentally dubbed her, had trotted off. Stupid bug. Totally would’ve whooped her flank if she was the real Applejack. Or, you know, had fought fair. Still would’ve won. AJ never beats me in hoofwrestling! … Well, okay there was that one time … or two. Whatever. She usually never beats me except on the rare occasion when she does.

The soft trilling of birdsong reached Rainbow’s ears. It was too neat, too organized to have been random. Her ears perked as she looked around for the source of the noise. The gentle harmonizing hum of Fluttershy clinched it. Just glad Fluttershy didn’t walk in on me and Fakerjack, Dash mused as she trotted deeper into the gardens. I’ll check in on Fluttershy, see if she noticed anything odd about Applejack I can use.

She spotted Fluttershy conducting her bird choir. The chirped and tweeted and … whatever else it was that birds did. Fluttershy’s head dipped and swayed as she conducted with a small baton she held in her mouth. As much as she wanted to talk to Fluttershy, Rainbow found herself stopping to just—listen. The music, while not as cool as Vinyl Scratch’s wubs or as energetic as Sapphire Shore’s songs, was still amazing.

Fluttershy sure has a way with animals. Rainbow mused as she fluttered up to a tree branch and got comfortable, not wanting to spoil the show by revealing herself just yet. Down below, a squirrel skittered out from under a bush and made its way over to Fluttershy. Rainbow barely paid it any mind, thinking that it was just another one of Fluttershy’s animal friends. Fluttershy probably has the animals here eating out of her hoof. At least, I hope her hoof. She shuddered as she remembered that one time she’d caught Fluttershy feeding animals from out of her own mouth. Gross.

But the squirrel scampered over to Fluttershy and began tugging on her tail. Fluttershy flinched and nearly dropped her baton. The bird choir fell into a ragged cacophony that made Rainbow want to cover her ears. Fluttershy turned around just as the squirrel’s tail disappeared back under the bushes. Her ears flattened as she sighed and picked up the baton, tapping it against the tree branch her birds were standing on. “Okay, let’s take it from the top…”

The song started again. Less than a minute later, a loud buzzing noise started up, drowning out the birdsong. Rainbow looked around, and spotted a wicked-looking, black feathered buzzard, well, buzzing. Loudly. It set Rainbow’s teeth on edge.

“Mr. Buzzard, please…” Fluttershy looked up at the big bird pleadingly. “I’d really like to hear you buzz, it’s very nice—but we really need to practice right n-OW!” She yelped as an acorn bounced off her temple. A small bunny chattered and dove back into the brushes.

Rainbow frowned. She’d seen Fluttershy talk a grumpy bear into taking its medicine and once pulled a rotted tooth out of the mouth of a manticore. She’d given massages to snakes and literally charmed birds from the trees. There was no way she should be having this much trouble with the garden animals.

She thought about flying in to help, but held herself back. Fluttershy’s got this...unless she isn’t really Fluttershy. Better wait and see what she does.

Fluttershy whirled, trying to spot any of the animals plaguing her. But they had all withdrawn into the trees. “Please--I don’t know what you want. I want to be your friend--I even brought you some apple pies, sprinkled with nuts and birdseed! Why won’t you just talk to me?”

There was no answer.

With a sad, weary sigh, Fluttershy turned back to her choir. “I’m very sorry about that. I guess they’re just a little unused to having new ponies and birds here. Let’s just get through this rehearsal and then we can try to make friends with them … again. Okay?” The birds nodded and flapped their wings in agreement. “Good, now, once more from the top…”

Practice got underway once more … though the chorus sounded a bit ragged to Rainbow’s ears. Every couple of minutes, she spotted Fluttershy’s head drift this way and that, no doubt watching and waiting for another animal to pop out to harass her. With her attention divided, the birds’ song suffered for it.

Just as Fluttershy noticed and began to correct it, a flurry of birds rushed down from a nearby tree: blue jays, red jays, green jays and pink jays! They dove down and flew through Fluttershy’s mane, turning it into a chaotic mess as they exited. A red-yellow blur, almost too fast for the pony eye to see, swooped down right over the choir, sending Fluttershy’s birds into a fearful scatter and grabbed the baton right out of Fluttershy’s mouth. “Oh my! No no, it’s okay--no reason to be scared!” Fluttershy pleaded, but the group had already scattered into the trees. A glee-filled caw echoed around, sounding a lot like laughter to Rainbow Dash.

“S-stop!” Fluttershy looked around, trying to see the garden animals that were already hidden in the bushes and the trees. “W-why are you doing this?” Her eyes glistened over with tears as she sniffled. “I-I just wanted to be friends with you! I just wanted you to love meeeeee--!” Her voice broke off into a thin wail.

Rainbow Dash felt her heart break. Okay, that’s enough. More than enough. The appearance of the red-yellow blur tipped her off. She flew down from her tree and wrapped Fluttershy up in a sudden hug. “Hey, hey s’okay Fluttershy, it’s okay.”

“R-Rainbow Dash?” Fluttershy hiccuped, scrubbing the tears from her face with a hoof. “What are you doing here?”

“Making sure my awesome friend is okay.” She gave Fluttershy a squeeze. “Sorry for not stepping in sooner, but I thought you could handle it.”

Fluttershy gave a miserable sounding whimper “I-I don’t understand! What did I do wrong? Why do all the animals in the gardens hate me?”

Dash patted her shoulder. “They don’t hate you. Just watch.” She put a hoof to her mouth and whistled. “All right Philomena, front and center!”

“Philomena? Who--” Fluttershy had barely spoken before a familiar red and yellow flash zoomed in front of her, landing on Rainbow’s outstretched foreleg, revealing itself to be a tall bird with brilliant plumage.

Rainbow nodded at the bird. “This is Philomena. She’s Celestia’s pet phoenix.”

Fluttershy’s eyes widened as she regarded her--and the phoenix--in awe. “The Princess’ pet … and a phoenix!” Philomena cawed proudly.

“Yeah, she’s pretty cool. Me and her? Friends from way back. Used to pull some awesome pranks together.” She looked to Philomena. “Have you been keeping the guards on their hooves since I’ve been gone?” Philomena dipper her head and let out a proud caw. “Heh, that’s my wingbuddy.” She offered up a wing, gently tapping it against the phoenix’s own.

“Oh my, friends with a phoenix that must be very nice.” Fluttershy looked at Rainbow and Philomena with an expression Rainbow didn’t quite recognize.

Dash just shrugged. “Yeah, it’s cool. She’s quite the prankster.” Philomena puffed up proudly, as Rainbow looked at her with a frown. “But sometimes, she needs a reminder of when she’s taking things too far. Not cool, Philomena. Not. Cool.” Philomena cawed and flapped her wings, sounding defensive. “Look, I don’t care if you thought it was funny. Fluttershy is my friend and you made her cry. You took it too far. Again. Now apologize.”

The phoenix looked at Fluttershy and let out a sheepish sounding squawk. “It’s okay,” Fluttershy gave a soft smile. “I just hope that we can be friends now? And that the rest of the royal garden animals will be friends with me and my bird friends too.”

“I think I can put in a good word for you.” Rainbow chimed in. “Philomena has the ear of a lot of the animals here. She smoothed things out between me and the rest of these critters. I, eh, might have done some flybys through the garden when I was a filly that miiight have set some of these guys on edge.” She rubbed her neck sheepishly.

Fluttershy frowned. “Rainbow, it's not very nice to scare animals.They don't understand that you were just playing.”

“I was just a kid!” Dash protested. “Besides, that was ages ago!” She flinched slightly under Fluttershy’s disapproving frown, but thankfully, Fluttershy let it drop.

“So how are you?” Fluttershy asked after a moment.

Rainbow shrugged. “Oh, I’m okay. Just dealing with some last minute stuff that came up. You know, the usual.” Giant love-eating monster bugs want to invade and take us over … how did that become the usual in my life? “You?”

“...Fine.” Fluttershy’s wings ruffled as she looked at the ground. “I’ve just been trying to practice with my birds. Well, I was until...” she shook her head. “Nevermind. Could you please ask her not to startle my bird friends? We need to practice and she won’t listen to me.”

Rainbow scraped a hoof against the ground. “Yeah, sorry about that. But hey, no problem. Philomena will stop bugging you, I guarantee it.”

Fluttershy’s ear gave a very slight twitch. “Yes. Thank you, Rainbow.”

“Anything else I can do to help?” Dash asked. Then an idea struck her. “You know, Philomena's got a pretty decent set of pipes on her. Maybe she could join your choir? I mean, I can ask for you, I'm sure she'd say yes. We go way back, right?”

Philomena nodded. Fluttershy looked between the phoenix and Rainbow Dash. After a long silence, she asked, “Will she behave herself?”

“She should, if I make it clear how important this is.” Rainbow shot the bird a warning look. “Especially since you’re my friend, Fluttershy.” Philomena nonchalantly started to preen her wing. Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Of course, I know a few tricks to help keep her in line. Want me to teach you?”

Fluttershy opened her mouth--then seemed to sag slightly. “Yes, please,” she murmured gently.

Rainbow blinked, wondering what that was about. “Okay … so, she likes treats, especially sweets. And she really likes it when you scratch underneath her beak and when she gets fidgety, just let her go flying for a bit. She’ll usually be back in a few minutes. And--” She rattled off a couple more tips as Fluttershy listened and nodded. There was something … off about Fluttershy. When Rainbow told her about how much Philomena liked sesame seed cakes with bird seed sprinkled on, Fluttershy seemed--almost annoyed. “...and she likes having her plumage stroked. I guess that’s about it.”

Fluttershy closed her eyes and took a deep breath before letting it out. “All right. Thank you, Rainbow.”

“Anytime.” Rainbow grinned and booped Fluttershy’s nose playfully. “Just don't let her walk all over you. I mean, you can let her stand on your back or your head if you like, but don't let her push you around, y'know?”

“I understand. I am used to dealing with Angel Bunny, after all,” Fluttershy reminded her.

Dash shrugged. “Yeah, but Philomena's just a prankster. Angel is kind of a jerk.” Kind of really a jerk, but she didn’t want to hurt Fluttershy’s feelings by saying it.

“Now now, Rainbow, Angel's a really nice bunny once you get to know him.” Fluttershy defended her animal companion. “He's just a bit ... erm…”

“Yeeeah, sure he is.” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “But Philomena? She's cool. She's a lot like me, which is I guess why we get along so great.”

Fluttershy fidgeted. “Oh. I guess, that would explain it…”

“Totally!” Rainbow confirmed. “We love pranks, flying fast and racing! We used to have races to see who could prank the most guards in an hour and then fly around the city until we lost them.”

“It sounds like you had a wonderful time.” Fluttershy shifted as she looked at Rainbow with a frown. “Why didn't you ever tell me about her?

Dash shrugged. “I dunno … it just didn’t come up.”

“But I talk about how much I love animals all the time…” Fluttershy mumbled, almost too low for Rainbow to hear. Almost.

Rainbow winced, clearing her throat. “So, uh, do you want any more tips on how to deal with the garden animals? I mean, I know that one buzzard gets kinda cranky in the morning … and that squirrel is really uptight when she's hungry.”

“Thank you, Rainbow, but I can manage.” Fluttershy’s soft voice had taken on a testy edge. Heedlessly, Rainbow went on.

“You sure?” Dash shuffled, trying to be helpful. “Because there's also that one bunny…”

Fluttershy whirled on her. “I said I know how to take care of animals, Rainbow!” She snapped at her. “I don’t need you to tell me how to do something I’ve been doing since I was a filly!” Jaw dropping, Rainbow hunched her shoulders and took a half step back. She watched Fluttershy blink, catching herself as she hastily clasped a hoof over her mouth.

Rainbow worked her jaw, but nothing came out. Finally she managed to work out a confused, “Fluttershy?”

Fluttershy mumbled, her ears drooping and flattening against her skull, slumping down until the grass nearly brushed her belly. “Sorry, I just ... sorry.”

“It---it's okay.” Dash blinked, feeling liked somepony just klonked her on the head. A thought occurred to her. Nah. It can’t be...but she had to ask, to be sure. “Uh, Fluttershy, are you---jealous?”

Fluttershy looked this way and that, making Rainbow think she’d have to practically force Fluttershy to answer. She was about to lean in closer when Fluttershy piped up. “Maybe. A little bit. It's just ... you got all this time with all these wonderful animals, and you never even appreciated it.

“I--well, animals aren't really my thing…” Rainbow defended, feeling like she had done something seriously wrong but wasn’t quite sure what.

“You always get things that other ponies would love to have, and then you don't appreciate them or even notice them. It's not fair.” Fluttershy gave a soft sigh. “And sometimes I get just a teeny-tiny bit jealous of everything you have, that I don't.”

There was no other way to put it, that hurt. Rainbow felt her throat constrict, letting nothing come out. Half-formed words danced across her mind but none ever made it to her tongue.

Fluttershy’s ears drooped when she saw that Rainbow wasn’t going to say anything. “Sorry, I ... I should go.” She slowly turned around and walked off, the animals in tow--even Philomena, who just looked at Rainbow with a sad, apologetic glance before turning away.

Rainbow Dash’s hindlegs gave out from under her and she sat down heavily. What just happened? This is just--wrong. Beyond wrong.

Fluttershy was nicest, sweetest, kindest pony Rainbow Dash had ever known. Rainbow had accidentally knocked her off a cloud when they were fillies--Fluttershy had only been saved by a swarm of butterflies--and Fluttershy had practically ended up apologizing to Rainbow for worrying her!

Ever since flight camp, Rainbow Dash had been Fluttershy’s protector, her guardian. She stood up for her against bullies and pushed her to be braver. Even when she’d gotten impatient or annoyed with Fluttershy’s timidness, Fluttershy had never retaliated in kind. Fluttershy had been her conscience and confidant. Whenever Rainbow botched a trick and was too full of pride to ask Derpy or Cloud Kicker for help, Fluttershy was always there with a bandage and a kind word. She would smile and tell Rainbow that she believed in her, that she could do anything. When Fluttershy said it, Dash believed it. Like an extra pair of wings that would never break, Fluttershy held her up. Only now, Rainbow’s hooves may have been firmly planted on the ground, but she was falling in place.

While they may have largely fallen out of touch when Rainbow went to Canterlot, as soon as the two had reconnected in Ponyville it was like they had never been apart. Never once, in all that time had Fluttershy ever made an issue out of Rainbow Dash being Princess Celestia’s student. She had never asked for a favor, never complained, never even gave the slightest hint of being jealous. Fluttershy had always been happy for her! Ponyfeathers, Fluttershy had been happier for her than she had been. She’d been too excited over doing the Sonic Rainboom and dreaming of joining the Wonderbolts.

Rainbow took a breath. Have I been unappreciative? She wondered to herself. Okay, yeah, being the Princess’ student was pretty cool. But Dash had worked hard to prove that she had deserved it. It had been ponies like the rich snobs of Canterlot who tried to cut her down, make her think that she didn’t deserve to be the Princess’ pupil. And now Fluttershy of all ponies was agreeing with them? No way.

There’s no way that can be Fluttershy. It just--it can’t be. No. Way. Rainbow’s mind raced, mentally trying to orient herself, like coming out a 720 degree spin and not knowing which way was up. I thought it was Applejack … but there’s no way the real Fluttershy could’ve done that! Fluttershy must be the changeling--right?

Then she thought back about how angry Applejack had been, how she practically tossed her to the ground. Doubt started to grow.

Rainbow Dash was truly at a loss. Applejack’s behavior had been pretty suspicious: her refusal to confront the truth that there were other, non-Apple-y ways of making food, how short-tempered and angry she’d gotten at her...it made sense if a changeling wanted to control what food would be served: if they wanted to drug or poison it. But Fluttershy’s behavior was no less strange. It’d make sense for a changeling to not be as animal-friendly as the real Fluttershy would be. And replacing Fluttershy would make sense. Who pays attention to the musicians before the wedding? They could go wherever they’d like and claim they were checking out the acoustics or something.

But how could she know which one of them was the fake? Rainbow rubbed her face. She needed another viewpoint. When this began, she didn’t think she could find which of her friends could be the imposter. Now she was starting to wonder if any of them weren’t.

Chapter 6

The rest of the afternoon faded away. Rainbow Dash, upset and overwhelmed, whiled the day away flying. She’d found that the best way to deal with a problem was to get some perspective, to think more clearly.

Clear skies, clear head. Rainbow drifted back towards the palace. It was getting late and she had agreed to meet with the others for dinner, as much as she didn’t want to. That was almost the worst part of it all: she didn’t even want to be with her best friends. She couldn’t relax around them, not with a changeling in their midst. Until she found the fake, she couldn’t trust any of them. And it hurt.

The castle loomed large in front of her. Glumly, Rainbow angled herself in for a landing. The guards—the ones she’d grown up with-- nodded to her and tossed her a salute. She flinched, half expecting to be jumped. When she wasn’t attacked, Rainbow Dash managed to relax—slightly.

Remaining on edge like this was beginning to get to her. It’s like the moment while waiting for a race to start—only stretched forever. She made her way to the dining room. Just as she was about to open the door she stopped, deciding to listen in. Dash tilted her head and pressed her ear against the door, hearing muffled sounds of conversation.

“--I can’t believe--”

“--I don’t know. What about?--”

“Simply horrid!”

“Quit your whinin’. I--”

The voices grew more entangled, making it impossible for Rainbow Dash to make out anything. Deciding to go for her usual forward approach, she pushed the doors open and walked in. Her five friends’ conversation quickly ground to a halt, raising Rainbow’s suspicions. Were they talking about me? She forced the thought aside. “Hey guys,” She nodded to them, trying to keep her voice level, casual. “What’s up?”

Twilight looked up from her checklist and smiled widely. Too widely? Rainbow wondered briefly, before returning it. “Hey, Twi.”

“Rainbow Dash, hello!” Twilight nodded to an empty seat. “We were just about to start eating.”

“S’cool.” Dash sat down and looked around. When her eyes drifted over to Fluttershy, Rainbow flinched and looked away. She couldn’t face her yet. Changeling or no, looking at Fluttershy and knowing that she was upset with her hurt. A lot. “So, uh, how’re things?”

Twilight took a bite of her dinner. “Going well, I think. Right girls?” A chorus of largely unenthusiastic responses answered her. Awkwardly clearing her throat, she pressed on. “Now that everypony’s here I can ask how your wedding tasks are coming along! Rainbow Dash?”

“Hm, what?” Dash blinked. “Oh, right. The Sonic Rainboom. It’s fine, it’s good.”

With undisguised glee, Twilight made a big show of putting a check on her checklist. “That’s great news! Applejack?”

The earth pony in question was staring balefully at her own meal. “S’going.” She grumbled.

Twilight blinked. “Um...is that good?”

“Y’all could say that--if by good ya mean that I’m stuck working with th’ most ornery, side-winding, low-down, high-falutin’ pain in the rump that I’ve ever flippin’ met, then yeah, things are fan-bucking-tastic!” Applejack glared at her meal suspiciously. “And I bet a bit to a barrel of my best cider that he spat in mah dinner.”

Rarity took a sip of her drink and elegantly rolled her eyes. “Oh come now, Applejack. Whatever--clashes of personality--that you and the good chef may be having, he is a professional. He would never stoop to something as crass as spitting in your meal.

“Oh yeah?” Applejack challenged her. “Then how ‘bout you and I trade then?”

“...No, thank you. I am quite happy with my own meal.”

“Thought so.”

Pinkie slurped loudly, interrupting her friends as she swallowed half a bowlful of pasta. “Boy, I’m lucky I don’t have to work with anypony like that!” she announced, before frowning a bit. “Because the ponies I’ve met so far haven’t been much fun at all.”

Twilight looked at Pinkie Pie, a worried frown on her face. “Do you mean you’re having problems with your work too?”

“Well, maybe a little.” Pinkie admitted, as she idly rubbed a hoof around the rim of her bowl. “It’s hard because I have all these great ideas for the bestest best party ever, but all the ponies with the really fancy hats who usually do all the stuff for the Grand Galloping Gala don’t like them!” Her face fell. “They didn’t like the mareiachi band, the pinatas…they didn’t even like games! I mean, who doesn’t like Pin the Tail on the pony? Who?!” She whirled around, demanding answers.

“It … surely is a mystery.” Twilight said slowly, looking hastily to Rarity. “So, how’s the work on the wedding dress going? I’m sure it’s going to look wonderful.”

Rarity tittered nervously. “Wahaha, of course they are, darling! My finest work, I should say!” She daintily dabbed at her cheeks with a napkin.

“Buuut?” Twilight prodded.

“It’s simply…” Rarity coughed. “A matter of finding the right … inspiration.”

Twilight sagged slightly in her seat. “Inspiration.”

“It’s essential!” Rarity affirmed, lifting a glass to her lips to save herself from having to elaborate further.

The news that Twilight couldn’t check off half the items on her checklist was making her visibly distressed. “Fluttershy? Please tell me you have some good news.”

Fluttershy shrank down in her seat. “Well, Mr. Bluejay made a new friend today--but I’m afraid Philomena is going to take some adjusting to singing with a group. She, um, rather likes being in the spotlight and needs to work on her sharing.”

“Great,” Twilight groaned. “We’re falling behind schedule!” She levitated several scrolls out of her saddlebag and hastily started consulting them. “I’ll have to rearrange everything to take this into account!”

“Chillax, Twilight.” Rainbow casually snagged a hooffull of bread rolls from Twilight’s plate. “Everything’ll work out. Right guys?” She looked around.

Pinkie Pie noisily swallowed a mouthful of pasta and nodded. “Yeah! Rainbow Dash is right! After all--” she clambered up on the table and began to dance.

Well, party party party!
I wanna have a party!
I need to have a party!
You better have a party!

Come on, party party party!
Ya gotta party hardy!
I'm gonna have a party!
Or else you will be sorry!

Dash leaned back at the vaguely threatening last line. Nopony else present quite knew how to respond to it either. Not seeing anypony else partying, Pinkie slunk back into her seat. “Aww, nopony wants to have fun.” She sulked, spotting Applejack roll her eyes. “You’re being silly, fighting with the chef like that. You’re spending so much time arguing that you aren’t helping me with the all the apple goodies like you promised!”

“Well, maybe if I got some more help in dealing with that no-good, galoot what calls himself a chef, maybe I’d have some more free time...Pinkie.” Applejack ground out.

Pinkie pouted. “But that’s no fair! I have to change all my plans for the reception because a bunch of snooty-snoot pants don’t like anything fun.” She shot Rarity a look.

The white unicorn harumphed. “I can hardly blame the Canterlot elite for wanting the first Royal Gala Wedding in history to be properly arranged. In any event, I’m sure I could speak to them about giving you more leeway in making the reception fun for the elite as well as the common pony.” She paused, before shooting Fluttershy a glance. “That is, if I’m not far too busy making all the dresses by myself.”

Fluttershy slunk down in her seat, but frowned at the table. “I’m very busy too … Philomena’s a little bit selfish and likes attention.” Her eyes flickered to Rainbow Dash, the subtext loud and clear.

Rainbow flinched. She never thought it could happen. Her friends...were turning into complete jerks. She looked over to Twilight, only to see her so wrapped up in her checklists and schedules that she didn’t even notice things falling apart. I can’t take this… Dash shoved herself away from the table and trotted out the door. She slowed herself down--but nopony even tried to stop her.

This is all wrong, She grumbled as she almost slammed the door shut behind her. It’s all wrong! All of them were acting wrong. Nothing made sense anymore...she soon found herself standing at one of the palace’s many large windows, watching the sunset. So far, that was the only thing she could still depend on: the rising and setting of the sun and moon.

A lone guard walked past as Rainbow was watching the sunset. She ignored it...until she caught a green shimmer out of the corner of her eye. That’s the same color that appeared when the changelings dropped their guise! She recalled as she leaped into action, quickly spreading her wings and zooming in front of the guard. And he looked young. A bit too young to be a palace guard. Tellingly, she noted, she didn’t recognize him. And she knew almost every guard in Canterlot--what with them constantly trying to chase her down.
“Hey!”

The guard paused as Dash put herself squarely in his way. “Can I help you, miss?”

We’ll see. Rainbow mused to herself, eyes narrowing. “I’ve never seen you around here before.”

If he was at all confused at being confronted by a civilian, he did his best to hide it. “I was posted to the castle two months ago, miss. Is something wrong?”

“What unit are you with? Who's your commanding officer?” She barked out her questions as she pointedly prodded him squarely in the chest.

“I'm with Machwing Company, my CO is Major Nimbus Gust.” A slight frown crossed his face at being interrogated in this manner.

Rainbow ignored it, recognizing the name of Cloud Kicker’s mother. “Yeah? If you know the Major, you'll know who her daughter is, then.” She crossed her forelegs over her chest, waiting for an answer.

“Ma’am, I'm just a private. I don't fraternize with the Major's family.” The guard’s tone was clipped, growing irritated.

Rainbow Dash didn’t buy it for a second. “Likely story!” She flapped her wings, giving her some altitude so she could look down on this so-called guard, practically pressing her face into his.

The guard grunted brusquely. “Ma'am, I'm not sure what your problem is, but I have duties to attend to, so…” He tried to walk past her, only to stop short when Rainbow slammed her hoof into the wall, scarcely a few inches in front of his snout.

“You're not going anywhere until I say you can!” Dash barked.

That caused the guard to noticeably tense. “Miss...are you threatening a member of Her Highness’ Royal Guard?” His voice was dangerously soft.

“Is that what I’m doing?” Rainbow asked. “Are you even really a guard?” Her eyes narrowed further, rolling her neck in preparation for trouble.

“Miss, you are obstructing a member of Her Highness' Royal Guard in the course of his duties. Desist at once, or I will be forced to detain you.” The guard shifted forward getting ready to spring at her.

Dash snorted. “I’d like to see you try, bug.”

Just as the two ponies were just about to spring at each other, another guardpony rounded the bend in the corridor and spotted the confrontation. This guard was slightly older and had the look of a veteran. “What's going on here?”

The guard tried to speak first. “Sergeant, this nag is—”

Rainbow cut him off, her tone practically pleasant. “Hey Steelwing.” She dipped her head to him, one of the guards Nightmare Moon had transformed into a Shadowbolt during her return.
“Miss Dash,” Sergeant Steelwing dipped his head to her, smiling fondly. “I hope you weren't pranking members of Her Highness' Royal Guard again…”

Rainbow relaxed slightly. “Him?” She nodded to the guard she’d been arguing with. “This is the type you're recruiting now, Steely?” She sighed plaintively. “Your standards are really slipping.”

“You know it takes a year to really whip them into proper shape.” Steelwing reminded her. “Is this anything I need to bring to his CO?”

“Dash ... pranks…” The new guard blinked as he recalled a couple of stories he heard around the barracks and put two and two together. “You're Princess Celestia's protege?!”

Rainbow’s wings twitched as she bristled. “You got a problem with that, newbie?”

“Er … no, Miss Dash.” The suddenly cowed guard dipped his head, ears flattening against his head. “No problems here.”

Rainbow looked to Steelwing. “You vouch for this guy, Steely?”

“Private Iron Hoof?” Steelwing nodded once. “Yeah, he's got a case of young and stupid, like most new recruits, but he's alright.”

Rainbow shot Iron Hoof one last look before relenting. “Yeah, well...fine. Just keep the newbies in line would you? I'm not around in Canterlot as much anymore, so I need you to keep Tender Hoof here on his toes.” She ignored Iron Hoof’s brief glare at her.

“Right, right. You have a good day, Miss Dash.” Steelwing beckoned to Iron Hoof and the two offered her a salute--Iron Hoof’s being offered begrudgingly--and continued their rounds.

Once the two were gone, Rainbow Dash let out a sigh and rubbed her face. There were so many ponies in town for the Gala Royal Wedding--both familiar and unfamiliar--that it was going to be impossible to keep track of everypony. Perfect for infiltration...I’m really starting to hate these bugs.

She trotted off to bed, wanting nothing more than to rest for a couple of hours and not have to think about this. But all dreamed about that night were her friends faces melting, revealing cruel monsters hidden just below the surface.

Chapter 8

With everything and everypony she knew acting completely crazy, Rainbow Dash looked for Pinkie Pie, trying to find comfort in a familiar sort of crazy.

It made sense at the time.

Rainbow trotted into the main hall where the reception was going to be held. Because of its expected size it would end up spilling out into the castle’s courtyard, but this was where the celebration was going to start. And if you were looking for Pinkie Pie, a celebration is the first place anypony would check first.

As soon as she opened the doors, balloons, confetti and streamers burst out like they were making a break for it. Rainbow didn’t see Pinkie through the thick of it all, but she heard her shouting. “Shut the door!”

It was hard going, but Rainbow eventually managed to pull the doors closed behind her. “Pinkie, where are you?” Between all the balloons and decorations, most of them pink (no surprise there, considering who was doing the decorating and who was getting married), it was like trying to spot Rarity in a snowstorm.

“Over here! I’m by the pool!”

The what? Dash blinked, maneuvering her way through the field of balloons until, sure enough, she came upon a small foal-sized pool. Huh. So that’s a thing. Would’ve made the past Grand Galloping Galas I’ve gone to a lot more fun. “Only you Pinkie, only you.”

Pinkie Pie’s head burst out the water, despite the pool appearing much too shallow for a full-sized pony to hide in. “Only me what?”

“GYAH!” Rainbow leaped back in shock. “Don’t do that! I’ve already had enough surprises lately!”

“Sorry!” Pinkie chirped, not sounding put off at all as she stepped out of the pool, shaking herself dry. “Been busy setting everything up! What do you think?”

Now through the worst of the balloon screen, Dash could take in the room and its decorations as a whole. Tables were set up along the walls, covered in plates and bowls that would eventually be filled with food and drinks. There were sculptures made of ice—Rainbow thought about mentioning that they’d probably melt before the wedding but decided against it—a chocolate fountain, little prizes and goody-bags strewn about in festive bags and boxes…all in all, it looked like a pretty awesome looking set up.

“This looks really great, Pinkie!” To Rainbow’s surprise, Pinkie’s smile seemed a touch…sad.

“Thanks Dashie.” Pinkie wrapped her up in a big, tight hug. “It means a lot that somepony likes it.”

“What do you mean?” Rainbow squirmed against Pinkie’s bear hug. What a grip for a somepony on the verge of losing her own! “Everypony loves your parties!”

Pinkie let go and sighed. “Except that they don’t. Not this time anyway…I don’t know why. I tried my super-duperiest best, I really really did!” Her mane seemed to droop in depression along with the rest of her. “But everypony wants me to do something different and what they want is different from each other so if I try to do everything the party’ll look like a big old jumbo puzzle made of pieces from different puzzles, which sounds kinda fun but it’s not.”

“What do you mean? Who doesn’t like all of this?” Rainbow waved a hoof around expressively.

“Well, first there was this group of ponies who usually organized the Grand Galloping Gala. I thought, ‘Great! Here’s a bunch of ponies who throw the biggest, bestest party in all of Equestria every year! We’re gonna get along great!’ So I wanted to surprise them by giving them a big hello with my welcome wagon and---”

She mixed up the batter and the confetti again. Rainbow mentally sighed.

“--I mixed up the batter and the confetti again!” Pinkie giggled. “What a mess! It was kind of funny…but nopony was laughing!” She frowned. “Even after I said sorry and offered to clean them up--I had already put the soap in the cannon--but instead they wanted to talk about the party. Which is great because I like to talk about parties!”

“No kidding.” Rainbow deadpanned.

“Never! ...Well, okay I like kidding a lot but not about parties! Parties are serious business and I had so many great ideas! With sundaes and sunrays and sasparillas and even things that don’t start with the letter s!” Pinkie slumped down. “But they didn’t like my ideas. They used a lot of words like ‘foalish,’ ‘banal,’ and ‘low-class.’”

Rainbow wasn’t surprised. For all its reputation as the biggest, most prestigious celebration in all of Equestria, the Grand Galloping Gala was a snorefest designed to appeal only to the most stiff, boring and upper crust ponies who had convinced themselves that fun was boring and boring was fun. “S’okay Pinks...I’ve been to the Gala before. The ponies that put it together were so unhip it’s a wonder their rumps didn’t fall off.”

That won a startled giggle out of Pinkie. “They’d look pretty silly running around without any rumps! Maybe I could get them to play Pin the Tail on the Pony?” Her brightened mood only lasted for a moment. “I just wanted so badly to make something fun for everypony: for Cadance and Shining Armor, for all the crowds of ponies coming to watch the wedding, and even for the snooty-snoot ponies. But I can’t!” Her big blue eyes started watering.

“Aww, Pinks…” Rainbow clapped a hoof on her shoulder. “S’okay. Me and the girls will love any party you throw, and Cadance will too.”

Pinkie stomped her hoof, her voice growing petulant. “No, they won’t. They haven’t even been helping. They’ve just been complaining and messing up what I’m trying to do!”

A sinking feeling began to grow in Rainbow’s gut. Not Pinkie too...swallowing heavily, she forced herself to ask Pinkie what she meant.

Pinkie’s frown grew more pronounced. “I asked Rarity to help me with all the snooty-pants ponies--maybe find something they’d like and everypony else would too. But no! She said she was too busy to help and just tried to boss me into doing whatever the fancy ponies wanted for the reception.”

Dash winced, having already seen what Rarity was like under stress. “Yeah, she’s...kinda dealing with a lot of stuff.”

“That’s no excuse!” Pinkie sulked. “And Applejack’s just as bad! She’s supposed to be baking way more sweets and cakes than she is right now, cuz she’s so busy arguing with that chef, so that just means even more work for me!” She rubbed her face and started talking faster and faster. “And Fluttershy’s been sneaking treats for her animal friends and says they’d really like to come to the party too and so would their friends at the royal zoo—and that'd be kinda fun actually but not in a wedding reception! All the animals would eat the food and then there wouldn't be anything left!”

“Pinkie--”

“And Twilight won't stop telling me to get things done and I'm doing my best and I tell her that but she just gets redder and redder until she storms off in a huff!” Pinkie grabbed a balloon and screamed into it, filling it with air before letting go. The now filled balloon floated to the top of the room … where it popped against a chandelier, releasing Pinkie Pie’s scream of frustration. “Arrrrrgh!”

Rainbow Dash couldn’t quite process this. Not just the thing with the balloon--there were some things about Pinkie Pie you just had to accept--but seeing her so angry. It just felt wrong. She managed to squelch the familiar suspicious feeling that had been her constant companion for the last few days and stammered out, “Uh … wow, Pinkie. That sure is ... something.”

Pinkie nodded. “It's a big something! And I've got too many somethings to deal with 'cause of the reception! I could just ... just…” She slammed a pink hoof down on a balloon and popped it. “There!”

There was no suppressing her surprise this time. “Whoa, Pinkie!”

But Pinkie seemed to miss just how shocked Rainbow was. “It’s fine. I got loads more anyways.” She huffed as she started inflating a replacement balloon.

“Are you … feeling okay, Pinkie?” Rainbow asked. She started to offer to help...but then she recalled just how well that worked with Rarity. Dash suddenly had a mental image of Pinkie asking her to inspect the party cannon--from the inside.

“I'll deal with it.” Pinkie sighed sadly, to Rainbow it was one of the most unnatural and depressing sounds she had ever heard. “'Cause if I don't I'll just get moaned at. Just about everypony has today. Except you, Dashie.” She gave Rainbow a sad nuzzle. “Thanks for being a pal. But you better go—I got big stuff to do.”

Rainbow recalled reading a book once upon something called mirror universes. Not universes you had to pass through a mirror to get through (those were just stupid), but a universe where everything was flipped. Mares were stallions and stallions were mares, Luna banished Celestia to the sun, totally far out crazy stuff. Right now, Rainbow Dash felt like she had somehow wandered into one of those mirror universes. It made about as much sense as anything else she’d seen lately.

Pinkie Pie was practically a whole ‘nother pony when she wasn’t her usually happy, giggly self. It was actually pretty jarring. Despite being occasionally put off by Pinkie’s randomness, Rainbow had become friends with the perky pink pony who would do whatever it took to make everypony else’s day better. But now that Pinkie was the one who needed some cheering up, Rainbow couldn’t do anything for her.

If that even is Pinkie… the familiar whisper of suspicion rose from Dash’s mind. Imagining that Pinkie was secretly a shapeshifting bug monster was somehow more plausible--and even a bit more comforting--than the thought that the sad little pony putting together the reception was actually Pinkie Pie.

Realizing that she’d left Pinkie without a reply, Rainbow managed to get out a hurried, “Well … I--okay. See you around Pinkie.”

“Yeah, bye.” Pinkie turned to work on some more preparations. “Hope your planning for Cadance’s bachelorette party goes better than mine.”

Bachelorette party? Rainbow’s eyes widened as she realized she’d practically forgotten all about it. As if I didn’t have enough on my plate! Then she remembered that her other friends from Ponyville--Cloud Kicker and Ditzy “Derpy” Doo--and the foals would be arriving soon too.

Derpy’s a really empathetic pony. She can tell if there’s something bothering somepony--or if they’re hiding anything. And Cloud’s spent lots of time with a bunch of stoic, stone-faced guards for relatives. If she can’t read bugs trying to be ponies, nopony can.

And they would be bringing with them the foals for Cadance’s flower girls: Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Dinky, Alula (and Pip would be holding the rings). Cadance had always been a bit foal crazy--Rainbow felt a brief moment of pity for poor Shining Armor--and the experience in liberating the Crystal Empire had only reinforced it. And the trio of Dinky, Alula and Pip had become a solid group of friends after their shared adventure together. Regular little heroes of the playground too.

With them and AJ and Rarity’s little sisters around, Rainbow was sure that the imposter would slip up, let something loose that would show it for what it really was. They’d be exposed in front of every...pony…

Dash’s face paled as she thought about having an unmasked changeling unloosed with a bunch of small foals around--including her godkid. No, no no! I can’t have one of those THINGS near Dinky or Scootaloo or any of the kids! Gyah! I have to figure this out before the kids get too close...but how?

That’s when she had one of her brilliant--if she did say so herself--ideas. The bachelorette party is gonna be the best chance to get everypony together some place public and without risking the kid’s safety. And with all the partying, booze and other stuff, they might let their guard down. That way, I can figure out once and for all just who the fake is. And I’ll have Cadance, Ditzy and Cloud around to help me out. They can tell me if they see anypony acting wrong! It’s perfect!

She frowned. Unless Cloud or Derpy have been replaced too! Dammit, can’t I trust anypony?! Rainbow trotted out, feeling her guts churning. She only hoped that the changelings focused their attention on Canterlot and its ponies, instead of reaching out to a small town like Ponyville. She’d keep her eyes open, but really hoped that Cloud and Derpy were still … themselves. Nah the changeling’s wouldn’t go after them … would they? Cloud’s part a big military family. The guard has about a bajillion Kickers in them. And Derpy--they could’ve gotten to one of my other friends through her. Nopony would ever suspect her!

Rainbow rubbed her face as she thought about it. Princess Celestia would’ve mentioned if she thought the changelings would go after my non-Elements of Harmony friends. Maybe I can try testing them with something. Like with muffins or...whatever weird pervy things Cloud likes. Ugh.

So the plan was: make sure Cloud Kicker and Derpy weren’t changelings, set up a bachelorette party to find out which of her best friends was a changeling, find her real friend and save Equestria.

First thing was first though. Where do I find a bunch of strippers on such short notice?

Chapter 9

Rainbow’s wings twitched in irritation as she impatiently paced up and down the Canterlot train station. Oh come on how long does it take the train to arrive? What did they get stuck behind a dumb rock or something? They’re so late! She glanced irritatingly at the station clock. How is that Princess Celestia can raise and lower the sun on time for thousands of years, but she can’t make the trains run on time? I oughta write a letter…

After what seemed like an eternity, the Ponyville train pulled into Canterlot station a full two and a half minutes behind schedule. Dash’s hooves tapped impatiently as the train crawled to a halt. Then with a final burst of steam, it stopped. The train doors opened—and immediately Rainbow found herself tackled to the ground as something hit her in the chest.

A brief burst of panic swelled up in Dash as she looked down to see what had tackled her, expecting a changeling or a monster or—

“RAINBOW DAAASH!” Dinky Doo clung to Rainbow’s chest, hugging her forcefully. “I missed you so—” she gave Rainbow a fillyish kiss on the cheek “—darn—” and again on the other cheek “—much!”

Rainbow blinked in surprise. She reached around to hug Dinky back when she paused. Was this really Dinky? Or just a changeling wearing her goddaughter’s appearance? Oh Celestia, can I really trust anypony?

Dinky nuzzled Rainbow’s chest, then looked up at her with her big, golden, trusting eyes. “You a’kay Rainbow?” When Rainbow didn’t respond, her ears lowered slightly. “Did I do something wrong? I’m sorry if I did…”

Oh, no. Dash felt the bottom of her stomach give way. Feather the changelings, this is my godkid and she needs this. I need this. She hugged Dinky tightly, prompting a surprised ‘Whoa!’ from the little filly. “No, you didn’t. You’re perfect.” She didn’t let go or look up until she heard Ditzy Doo’s hoofsteps on the platform.

“Hey, Rainbow.” She smiled at the closeness between Rainbow Dash and her goddaughter.

Rainbow looked up at her old friend, holding Dinky protectively close as she looked for any sign that Ditzy wasn’t who she said she was. Unaware of Rainbow’s suspicions, she just smiled that Derpy smile of hers, her left eye rolling around and keeping an eye on the other kids.

Yeah, that’s Derpy all right. Rainbow decided. No bug could imitate her eyes without getting totally nauseous. “Hey Derpy. Got all the kids here?”

Derpy nodded, looking over at Cloud Kicker, who was standing in the midst of the Ponyville foals they had brought: Alula, Pipsqueak, Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. “And then some. I’m just glad Cloud could come with me. I can handle a few, but I couldn’t have managed all of them without her help.”

“I can believe that.” Rainbow gave Dinky one last squeeze. “But organizing a Royal Gala Wedding is a lot harder. Wanna trade?”

“And now you have to plan a Royal Gala Wedding with the kids around,” Derpy teased.

Dinky scrunched her muzzle in thought. “That's gonna be like herdin' cats ... 'cept cats're evil, an' nopony here's evil, huh Rainbow?”

Dash coughed and ruffled Dinky’s mane. “Something like that.”

“Whaddaya mean ‘Somethin' like that’?” Dinky tilted her head, then gasped dramatically as something occurred to her. “Oh NOES! We got cats around here?! I'll go tell Apple Bloom t'go back an' get Winona!”

“You don't have to do that, Muffin,” Derpy quickly said. “If Rainbow Dash wanted a hoof with anything, I'm sure she'd ask you.”

Rainbow nodded. “You know it.” She smiled for the first real time in days. “Never change, Dinks.”

Dinky’s voice was slightly muffled from the hug, but she still managed to get out an “A'kay!”

The other kids, having gotten their first (for some of them) look at Canterlot, finally noticed Rainbow Dash and ran over to say their hellos. Cloud Kicker’s little sister Alula was first to reach her. “Hi Rainbow!” She leaped into the air, hugging Dash around the neck.

Cloud Kicker walked up at a more sedate pace. “That’s a warmer welcome than she gave me,” she complained in a faux-whine. “I feel the love, sis.”

Rainbow grinned. “Heh, heya, 'lula. How's the most awesome Kicker I know?”

“Good. I've been really good and did all my homework,” the filly announced, proud of her great achievement.

“Ow, burned again. Rejected by my sister and Rainbow.” Cloud clutched her chest. “I don’t know how I’ll go on…”

Dinky immediately hugged Cloud’s nearest leg. “I’ll help ya!” She nuzzled her.

Rainbow tousled Alula’s mane, her signature move with kids. “That's great. You looking forward to being a flower filly?”

Alula shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. It's just flower stuff, right?”

Rainbow thought she had a point. If she had been asked to do this as a filly, her response would’ve been pretty similar. Still, there were some fringe benefits. “Right. But hey, you'll be right there for a Royal Wedding--with plenty of wedding cake and stuff!”

“Oooh, cake!” Alula smacked her lips at the thought.

“Exactly,” Dash grinned. “And I bet awesome flower fillies get their piece nice and early.” She nudged her. “I heard you've been telling your family all about your big adventure in the Crystal Empire?”

Alula nodded, all the pain and fear about the experience having been buried in the ancient past—a whole six months ago! To a filly, that was almost forever. “Yeah, it was super-neat!”

“You're a regular little Kicker hero, huh?” Rainbow set her down and saluted.

“Uh-huh!” Alula saluted back, albeit with the wrong hoof. “I'm a soldier, just like Mommy and Daddy!”

“You sure are.” Rainbow nodded to Cloud. “You got a cool sister here, Cloud.”

Cloud Kicker grinned. “Yeah, she's pretty cool.” She paused to ruffle her mane. “For a baby.”

That prompted a fuss and grumble from Alula. “Not a baby...”

“So what’s up Rainbow? You doing good?” Cloud asked.

“I could actually use your expertise for planning to bachelorette party.”

“Oooh…” Cloud grinned wolfishly. “Sounds like something to talk over later.”

Dinky looked up, a big excited smile on her face. “A party? Ooh, that sounds like fun! Can I come?” She tilted her head. “Wutever it is.” Alula nodded in agreement.

“Sorry, it's an adult-only party.” Cloud’s explanation elicited a fillyish chorus of ‘awwws.’

Rainbow reached down to pat Dinky’s head. “It’s okay, squirt. They probably won't even have party hats. Buuut I think Pinkie Pie set up a small party for you and all the flower fillies at the castle.”

Alula’s eyes widened. “Oooh, a Pinkie Party?”

“Yes!” Derpy said quickly. “A Pinkie Party--just for the flower fillies.” Spotting Pipsqueak’s downtrodden look, she quickly added, “and ring bearing colts too!”

“That sounds fun too!” Dinky beamed at her friends.

“Yeah!” Scootaloo stepped forward, her wings buzzing in excitement. “And you’ll do a Sonic Rainboom at the wedding, right? It’s going to be so cool!”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “You bet it is! I just need to talk to Cloud and Derpy for a bit, but then we’ll take you to the castle.”

Cloud cut in. “Actually, my parents can take them.” She nodded to the pair of older ponies in guard uniforms that were waiting off to the side.

“That’s even better.” Dash forced herself to sound natural. She didn’t want to leave the kids alone with anypony unless she was sure they weren’t changelings. But on the other hoof, she really needed to talk to Cloud and Derpy. Going by what the Princess had told her, she didn’t think the changelings would bother replacing a bunch of little kids. Be a bit hard for big bugs to pull off little ponies, she thought. “Okay, I just need to talk to you guys about something.”

“Oh?” Cloud grinned. “Go on.”

She had meant to ease her way into the subject, but she was in a rush. “I need to find a few naked stallions and hard cider.”

Cloud and Derpy blinked. It was the wall-eyed mare who found her voice first. “…but we don't usually wear clothes, Rainbow.”

Shaking her head, Cloud Kicker recovered and squeed. “My little Dashie is all grown up! Can we throw in a few mares too for variety's sake? Ooh! I have a list! What’s your preference?” She dug into her saddle bag, looking for something. “Word of advice, griffon dancers are frisky. There is a reason their poles look like scratching posts.”

Rainbow facehooved. Hard. “No, I mean for the bachelorette party! Everyone has been edgy and I want a super cool blowout to cheer everypony up.”

That only made the smile on Cloud’s face grow wider. From her bag she pulled out a small black book, hastily flipping through it. “Stand back ladies. I have favors to call in.” She cackled. “At last, this is Cloud’s time to shine! Mwahaha!”

Hesitantly, Derpy edged her way behind Rainbow Dash. “Should she be giggling like that? I wanna hide now.”

Rainbow was too busy trying to hide behind Derpy as she tried to hide behind her. “This is Cloud here ... I think I woke a sleeping orthros.” Dash winced as she tried to head things off before her lusty friend got too into things. “Actually,” she cut in hurriedly. “I found a place that I want your opinions on. It’s right nearby. Come on.” She turned and hurried off, not giving the two a chance to reply. The two pegasi left on the platform looked at each other, shrugged, and followed her.

Rainbow led them down the winding twists and turns of Canterlot’s streets and alleys, often doubling back and leading them on strangely exaggerated routes. After about ten minutes of walking, she stopped, having led her friends to an empty alleyway.

Derpy looked around. “This doesn’t seem like a good place to hold a party.”

Her friends were certainly surprised. “Dash?” Cloud blinked. “What’s going on?”

“Shhh!” Rainbow hushed them as she looked around, making sure they weren't followed and weren’t being listened in-on.

Cloud Kicker cleared her throat. “Uh, Rainbow? Are you going to explain what's up?”

“Trouble.” Rainbow eyed both her friends. “I need your help, but this can't go any further than the two of you. Promise me you won't repeat a word of this to anypony.”

Derpy and Cloud shared a look with each other before answering. “Done.” Cloud swiftly agreed. Derpy echoed her, but sounded less certain and a touch more nervous.

Rainbow Dash sighed and rubbed her head. “Okay…here goes: there's a conspiracy going on in Canterlot.”

That rocked Cloud and Derpy on their hooves. “Oh wow. That sounds ... bad.” Cloud gulped.

Derpy blinked in surprise and looked around with her wall eyes. “What's going on?”

“There are these creatures called Changelings--they're like pony-sized bugs that can turn themselves into anypony,” Dash explained. “They're infiltrating the city to take it over. Princess Celestia said they replace somepony you love and feed off of your love. If you give them enough of your love, they can control you like a puppet. Then, when they've replaced enough ponies...” She stamped a hoof down on the ground. “They stick everypony in cocoons and feed off us all!”

Derpy and Cloud studied Rainbow’s face, hoping this was just a prank of some sort. When her expression didn’t waver and didn’t smile, it began to dawn on them that she was serious. “It's just Canterlot, right?” Derpy asked, desperately seeking reassurance. “They're not in Ponyville, too?”

“Oh. Oh geeze.” Cloud’s face fell. “That sounds really bad. I'm guessing she can't put the city on lockdown or something, because the guard might be compromised?”

Rainbow shook her head. "I think it's just Canterlot. They want to focus on replacing really important ponies and stuff first." She nodded to Cloud. "Yeah, me and Zecora got ambushed by a group of changeling guards after I arrived. We got separated...don't know what's happened to her since." She twitched her wings. "I could've really used her help."

Clouds eyes widened. “Oh Celestia, if they're in the Guard, then my family...” She shifted on her hooves, looking over her shoulder and looking torn between staying and flying off to find her family.

Rainbow preempted her. "Cloud, no!" She grabbed her by the shoulders. "You can't! If they have been replaced, then you'll just get yourself caught too! And the Princess said that changelings don't kill the ponies they abduct, just feed off them.”

“It's my family, Rainbow!” Cloud Kicker half-heartedly tried to shake her hooves off. “You can't tell me you'd just sit and do nothing if some bug monster could be eating your parents!”

“I know, I know!” Dash shouted, tightening her hold. “But if they have been replaced there’s nothing we can do about it right now! I don’t know where they took them or what’ll happen if you tip them off that we know about them!”

Derpy nodded. “And there’s every chance that they’re fine and haven’t been gotten to,” she hastily added.

“But...” Cloud swallowed. “But I have to do something!”

Rainbow, winced, knowing how she felt. "Look...Celestia said she was working her way through the guards to find out who's been replaced and who hasn't. But that's not the biggest problem right now."

“What?!” Derpy gaped.

Cloud Kicker’s eyes widened, but her voice radiated incredulousness. “My family's in danger, and that's not a problem?”

"It's not the biggest problem," Rainbow stressed. "Even if the guard has been replaced, we still have an ace in the hole: remember, the Elements of Harmony? If we have those, we win." Her face fell. "Which is why the changelings replaced one of my friends."

Derpy moaned. “Oh. Oh no...”

“Oh dammit.” Cloud groaned. “And I'm guessing there's no way of telling who?”

Dash shook her head slowly. “I've been trying to figure out which one of them it is without tipping off the fake, but...” she leaned back against the wall, sliding down into a slump, feeling all the weariness and tension and lack of sleep she’d been feeling for the past several days crash on her all at once. “All of them have been acting weird. It could be any one of them.” She groaned. “I have to figure this out before the wedding.”

There was silence for a minute as Rainbow’s friends tried to absorb everything. “Okay. That doesn't give us much time.” Cloud rallied with a confidence that Rainbow envied right now. “Do you have a plan?”

Rainbow grunted. Plans were more Twilight’s department than hers. She was so desperate and at her wits end that she had briefly considered putting on a disguise to follow her friends around: take on the identity of a superhero to do—something that would somehow make things better. She quickly abandoned that plan when she realized it was stupid. Incredibly, incredibly stupid.

She shrugged at Cloud. “I tried talking to them all separately and got nowhere. I figure I need to get them all in a room and see if they spot anypony acting weird. And the only place all of them will all be together is the bachelorette party.”

Derpy rubbed her head. “Great … well, hopefully we can get a better feel for them at the party.” She quirked her brow at Cloud, who—to her surprise—passed on the obvious chance to make an innuendo. Things were apparently that serious.

Cloud rubbed her nose with a hoof. “I’m—I’m gonna check in on Alula and my folks. I’m not gonna do anything to tip our hoof,” she added quickly. “Just—y’know. Then I’ll start rounding up the dancers and drinks. I’ll meet you back at the castle in a few hours. See ya.” Without waiting for a reply, she took to the air and flew off.

“You want me to stick around?” Derpy offered, nuzzling Rainbow as her friend sighed. “This is a lot for any one pony to deal with. Even you.”

“Thanks, Derpy … but right now, I just want to clear my head for a bit.” Rainbow smiled weakly. “Catch you around later.”

“Of course. Anytime you need me.” Derpy hugged her. “I’m going to see to Dinky, and then I’ll help with the bachelorette party.”

Dash grinned wryly. “You’re going to bake muffins, aren’t you?”

Derpy’s eyes rolled this way and that, looking anyplace but directly at Rainbow. “Um…”

That made her rainbow maned friend chuckle. “S’fine. Just don’t bake a giant one for Cloud to pop out of and it’ll be fine.”

“Okay then!” Derpy’s voice took on its more normal bubbly tone. “I’d probably eat it anyway. See you later, Rainbow Dash!”

With a nod and wave, the two pegasi took off in different directions. Rainbow Dash drifted through Canterlot, she thought about dropping by to get Vinyl Scratch onboard for the bachelorette party. She’d already put her in contact with Pinkie for the reception, but if anypony could be trusted to hold a wild, yet discreet party it was Vinyl.

The club Vinyl, in her DJ-P0N3 identity, performed most frequently at was quiet. But given the time of day, that was hardly surprising. Raves were seldom known to happen during a weekday lunch. Though if Pinkie Pie had anything to say about it...

As Rainbow Dash got closer, she found that while there wasn’t any music playing, the club wasn’t as quiet as it first sounded. She heard the sounds of yelling and arguing. Taking advantage of an open skylight, Dash bypassed the door and soon found herself on the club’s stage: right in the middle of a shouting match between Vinyl Scratch and Twilight Sparkle.

“Nonono! This won’t work! You have start with the waltzes—organized by the last name of their composer—then you can move on to more popular songs as scored by the popularity on the charts, and then you can play your stup deb.” Twilight had a frantic look in her eyes. “Otherwise everything’ll be ruined!”

“Okay first off, it’s Dub step.” Vinyl shook her head, her eyes peeking out over the rim of her sunglasses. “And seriously? I’ve been DJing parties for years. I think I know how to put together the music.”

Twilight drew herself up. “And I’ve been organizing and keeping meticulous order of events since I was foal.”

Rainbow remembered how things had gone the last time her best friends had argued with one of her Canterlot friends—Trixie—and decided to step in before things got to that state. “Whoa whoa whoa!” She glided over and put herself in between Vinyl and Twilight. “We’re all friends here. Twilight, you remember me telling you about my old friend, Vinyl Scratch? How she, Cloud Kicker and me used to hang out when I lived here?” She waited for Twilight to give an almost imperceptible nod. “And Vinyl, this is Twilight Sparkle. I, uh, guess you’ve met already.”

Vinyl’s shades couldn’t hide her right brow rising in a skeptical ‘Are you kidding me?’ gesture. “You could say that.”

Looking pretty annoyed as well, Twilight began grumbling. “Not my fault she can’t arrange the music in a sensible manner…”

Rainbow looked pained. “Come on, Twi … Vinyl knows what she’s doing. It’ll be okay.”

“Ugh!” Twilight stomped her hoof angrily. “That’s what all our friends have been telling me about their roles and it’s been a total disaster!” Her horn began to glow and a scroll materialized. “I mean, do you see this? Do you see what this is?!” Twilight waved it in front of Rainbow’s face. It was a checklist outlining the various wedding tasks and the ponies in charge of them. Twilight drove the point home. “It’s a checklist without any checks! And a checklist is supposed to have checks. That’s the entire reason why we call it a checklist!”

“Twilight--” Rainbow started.

“I’ve never had a checklist with so few checks!” She stamped her hoof. “Look at this! Catering? Nope! Applejack’s too busy fighting with the kitchen staff and Pinkie’s too busy arguing with the Gala planners. Oh, but that’s not all! They’re also arguing with each other about how many deserts and apple-based foods there should be and ignoring the ratio I painstakingly put together detailing just that very question!”

“But Twi--” Dash tried again, only to be ignored.

Twilight jammed her hoof at another blank box. “See that? That’s where they’re supposed to be a check for the wedding dresses! But there isn’t! Because Fluttershy’s been too busy with the animals to help Rarity, and Rarity’s been busy taking on more orders than she can handle!” She glowered at Rainbow Dash. “Is there anything I’m forgetting? The clock is ticking, Rainbow! Clock. Is. Ticking!” Her ear twitched and flopped this way and that. “Why can nopony but me hear the ticking? Why doesn't everypony just do exactly what I tell them to do so that the wedding be perfect and orderly and nothing will go wrong! ARGH!”

“I think you might be forgetting that you have to breathe,” Rainbow joked lamely. “Twilight, just—come on. Take some deep breaths and calm down—”

Twilight swatted her wing away with her hoof. “Calm down? CALM DOWN?! How can I calm down when this wedding is dissolving into chaos because nopony's listening to me?” She vanished in a burst of magic, reappearing over by Vinyl. She pointed to the DJ angrily. “She won't play the right music! Make her play the right music!” Before Vinyl or Rainbow could protest, Twilight had teleported herself back. “And Applejack's still horribly behind schedule!” She waved her schedule around before teleporting over to the far side of the club, where she paced furiously. “Rarity's not done with the dresses yet and Fluttershy's still working with the animals. I can't go five minutes without somepony complaining about Pinkie's party preparations!” She teleported right in front of Rainbow Dash, her mane frazzled and slightly singed by the constant teleportation, her left eye twitching. “And what about you? Are you ready yet? What are you doing to help everypony get ready? You've just been going around Canterlot asking us all questions! Why aren't you helping to restore order to this madness!?”

“TWILIGHT!” Rainbow shouted. “It’s gonna be okay! Really!”

“I must create orderrr!” Twilight shouted before teleporting away.

Vinyl adjusted her glasses, which had gotten slightly akimbo, before nodding to Rainbow Dash. “...So she's one of your new PFFs?”

Rainbow sighed. “Yes.”

The DJ nodded, things seemingly coming into place for her. “What is it with you and the crazy ones?”

“Shuddup, Scratchy.”

Rainbow Dash apologized for Twilight, but Vinyl just shrugged and waved it off. “She’s just wound a bit too tight for her big brother’s wedding.” Rainbow just wished she could be sure that was all it was. After getting Vinyl onboard for the bachelorette party, she flew back to the castle. The second she arrived in her room, she practically collapsed onto the bed. She wanted to take a nice, long nap.

So of course, somepony had to knock at the door.

“I already gave at the office!” Dash shouted at the door, too thoroughly annoyed to care who it was or what they wanted.

“It’s me,” she recognized Cloud Kicker’s voice. “You want me to come back another time?”

It was all Rainbow could do not to scream ‘Hay, yes!’ but the fate of her friends and Equestria was in the balance, so she groaned and nodded. Then she remembered that Cloud couldn’t see through doors and called out to her. “Yeah, come on in.”

Cloud walked in, closing the door behind her. “Hey. Sorry about before, but I just had to see my family, you know? Make sure they were okay.”

“I get it.” Dash sighed, thinking of her friends. She just counted herself fortunate that her parents were still in Cloudsdale. They wouldn’t arrive until just before the wedding. “S’okay.”

Trying to lighten the mood, Cloud chuckled. “I see you’re already in bed.” She sat down next to Rainbow, eyebrows wiggling. “Mind if I join you?”

Rainbow rolled her eyes and went to her normal Cloud Kicker corrective technique: vigorously applying her wing upside Cloud’s head. “Come on CK, this is serious.”

Unphased, Cloud shrugged, fixing her mane. “Yeah, I know, but a joke or two can't hurt.” She looked Rainbow Dash over. “You look like you could use a laugh.”

“I'm probably not gonna be laughing for a bit,” she rubbed her face tiredly. “Not until we get this under control. I don't know who I can trust anymore. I'm taking a big chance that you and Derpy are—well, you and Derpy.”

Cloud held up her hooves at Rainbow. “Yeah, okay. I get that. Just saying, you're wound up tighter than a...” She paused, obviously thinking of a sexual comparison she knew would just make her friend more uncomfortable, and wisely chose not to employ it. “A ... well something that's wound up really tight. And that can't be making it any easier to investigate things.”

Her effort in tact proved to be in vain. “I know that!” Dash snapped at her. “But you try investigating your best friends all the while looking over your shoulder in case some giant bug comes by to replace you and you spend practically all night staying awake by a lit candle and drinking tons of coffee and constantly coming up with plans to stop an invasion that could be only days away—” her voice trailed off into a wheeze as she had become so worked up that she needed to stop and take a breath.

“Whoa! Settle down, girl!” Cloud grabbed Rainbow’s shoulders to steady her. “We're trying to help!”

“I know!” Rainbow paused, took a breath then sighed. “I know. It’s just been so hard. I suck at looking for clues and investigating and stuff. Twilight's practically Sherlock Hooves with how smart she is. Rarity has a freaky eye for details, Applejack can just tell when things aren't right, Fluttershy's could charm anypony into spilling anything and Pinkie...is Pinkie. But me? I'm just too dumb for this.”

Cloud stomped her hoof. “You are not dumb.”

“I can't even tell which of my best friends isn't who they say they are. I'm either dumb or a lousy friend ... or both.”

Without another word, Cloud went over and hugged her tight. “Rainbow, you're not dumb. This is just outside your area of expertise. Which is why I'm gonna help you.”

That made her all but collapse into Cloud’s hug. “Thank you—you and Derpy are two of the best. Even if you don't get fancy necklaces and magic powers, you're still my awesome friends.”

“Darn right.” Cloud nuzzled Rainbow’s cheek. “Now let's buck up and figure out how to solve this thing. Between the three of us, I know we can handle it.”

Her confidence restored—finally somepony she could talk to about all this—Rainbow nodded. “Right!”

Cloud gave a sharp nod. “So, what've you found so far?”

Rainbow sighed and flopped down on her bed. “Okay, so they’re all acting off.”

“Right. I guess we can do a quick rundown of the evidence on each one of them.” Cloud reasoned, sitting down next to her. “So, how's AJ acting off?”

“She's flipping her lid because she has to work with this fancy, foul-mouthed royal chef and she just wants to do everything the old fashioned Apple way and screw everypony or anything that's different.” Dash snapped, obviously still a bit sore about it. “And that goes double if you try to tell her any different.”

Cloud winced. Okay, that sounds pretty bad.” She thought for a moment. “But that doesn't sound too off for Applejack. She's always been a bit stubborn and old-fashioned.”

Dash bristled. “Yeah, well, she also doesn’t get so worked up that she almost dislocated my shoulder in hoof-wrestling—and cheated too!” That rankled. “All I did was point out that she can’t pull off the catering for a Royal Gala Wedding by herself using her Granny Smith’s methods or whatever.”

"Okay, you’ve got a point there," Cloud Kicker admitted. "Just saying, my initial inclination is to say that there's nothing there that doesn't fit with her just being in a bad mood.”

“Even Applejack in a bad mood is still Applejack.” Rainbow flicked her wings. “Here—she was just totally trying to avoid the truth ‘cuz she didn’t like it. That’s not the AJ, I know. And after she almost pulled my foreleg out, she just walked away without even a ‘sorry.’”

“Well, assuming Applejack isn’t our imposter, I’ll give her an earful about that later. But, to keep playing Nightmare’s advocate, she might not have realized she hurt you. When Applejack gets mad she stops thinking clearly. And given how competitive she is and how much all this wedding stuff was getting to her—anypony can snap and say or do something they regret.”

She kept her tone light, but Rainbow knew what Cloud was aiming at: the things Rainbow Dash and Celestia had said to each other before—and right after—Nightmare Moon’s return, Derpy’s panic when Dinky was abducted by Sombra. “Maybe. But would she really act that different if she was a Changeling? Being so uptight about doing everything her way would make it easier to drug or poison all the food. Take out all the higher ups in Equestria at once.”

“Yeah. It's worth checking out,” Cloud agreed. “So, what about the others?” She asked as she started kneading Rainbow’s back.

The tired pegasus shut her eyes, torn between wanting to take a nap and taking advantage of having somepony here to talk to. “Rarity's high-strung, demanding and really nitpicky--so I'd say she's normal, except for a couple of things.”

“Such as?”

Rainbow shifted around. “Well, while she was supposed to be making Cadance’s dress and dresses for the bridesmaids and flower fillies, she took a bunch of commissions for some of the nobles attending the wedding. When I visited her she was fretting over those dresses and hadn’t finished the ones me and the girls are supposed to be wearing. I didn’t even see Cadance’s, and it’s her wedding!”

Cloud nodded faintly. “I think I get what you’re aiming at. It might be selfish of her, but to have the opportunity to advance her lifelong dream drop in her lap like that—It’d be like the Wonderbolts trying to get you to audition while you’re supposed to be practicing the Sonic Rainboom for the wedding. It’d be hard to say no.”

A grunt was Cloud’s only indication that she had hit the mark. “Okay, yeah, I get it.” Rainbow grumbled. “But the dresses the nobles were having her making? They were, well, I’m no fashionista—”

“Do tell?” Cloud quipped.

“—but even I could tell these dresses weren’t any good,” Rainbow finished, ignoring her. “But Rarity fell all over herself assuring those snobs that of course their dress design was great, and of course it didn’t make them look like something a clown threw up or whatever.”

Cloud whistled. “Yikes. That bad?”

Dash nodded. “I mean, it felt like she was as worried about that as she was getting the dresses ready for the wedding. And she just ... let her creativity and her reputation get rained on for the sake of making some fancy noble happy. S'just ... wrong. If the Wonderbolts wanted me to dress up like a pig and fly butt first into a brick wall, I’d tell them no way. But Rarity just … took it. She can’t stand it when even a stitch is out of place, but here she just lied through her teeth to please them.”

“That sounds too bad,” Cloud chewed her lip. “Though she wouldn't be the first artist to compromise her artistic integrity to please a demanding client, especially if she thought it could make it big.”

“On top of that, there was also some back room that she didn't want to me to go in. And she got me to run errands all over Canterlot for her. She made me waste an entire day by asking me to do ‘one small thing’ ... and then turning it into a bajillion annoying things!”

“Okay, that is a bit suspicious.” Cloud admitted.

“I know, right? Who knows what she could’ve been doing while she was keeping me busy? Inviting nobles in to try on their outfits and having some changelings waiting in the wings to replace them since they were alone?” Rainbow paused. “And then there was Pinkie Pie. She was, well, angry.”

“No pony is all sunshine and bubbles. Not even Pinkie Pie.” Cloud offered.

Dash grunted skeptically. “This wasn’t just a bad mood because nopony liked her idea for a kumquat festival. This was really mad. Even for another pony, this was bad. And considering how hard she always tries to put a good spin on things--yeah, it just seemed weird.”

“Parties are a serious business for her,” Cloud reminded her. “It’s what she does. But let’s move on. What about the others?”

Rainbow grumbled. “And Fluttershy, well 'shy was....” she trailed off.

“What about Eepy?” Cloud asked, breaking out her old flight camp nickname for her.

“She snapped at me,” Rainbow confessed. “She got pissy because I offered some advice on how to deal with the Princess' pet phoenix and then just said ... well, really mean, un-Fluttershy stuff.”

The lack of details told Cloud Kicker more than an actual blow-by-blow would’ve. She could tell whatever Fluttershy had said, it had stung Rainbow pretty bad: made all the worse that of her five friends, Fluttershy was the first one Dash knew. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” Rainbow sat up. “But it was just so not like the Fluttershy I know. Like she was trying to say the most hurtful and awful things she could without screaming or cursing.”

“Oh geeze.” Cloud shook her head. “Eepy ... she's one of those ponies who buries a lot of stuff, and when it all boils over...”

“Assuming that it was Fluttershy,” Rainbow reminded her. “Which is kinda the point.” She rubbed her face. “I almost wish it was her.”

“Because then it would mean Fluttershy hadn't said those things to you?” Cloud supplied with a sigh. “Oh Rainbow,” she started working on the sensitive undersides of Dash’s wings. “You should talk to somepony about it some day. It's clearly bugging you.”

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Kinda busy,” she grunted. “Impending doom, remember? And there’s still Twilight.”

“Right, priorities. Just saying, I’m here if you need to talk about it.” Cloud sagged. “So, what about Twilight?”

“She's in charge of all the planning and stuff,” Rainbow shifted about. “And she's gone nuts when things don't go exactly right. Which, with everything going on with everypony else—is all the time now.”

“That sounds like Twi.” Cloud offered.

“No, you don't understand. This is insane level stuff. Her eyes twitch, her mane does this weird thing and she talks like she’s one step away from trying to take over the world in order to make sure all quills are the same size or whatever.”

That rocked Cloud back on her hooves. “Oh. Oh dear...”

“Yeah.” Rainbow shivered at just the memory of it. “So any one of them could be the changeling. And we gotta figure it out before the wedding.”

Cloud Kicker stretched her wing out to cover Rainbow's back. “Hey. Things might be crazy right now, but we’ll figure this out. You’re amazing and with us helping you, those bad bugs won’t stand a chance.” She nuzzled. “You’ll see.”

Rainbow was stopped from answering by a knock on the door. “Rainbow Dash are you there?” Cadance opened the door, accompanied by Shining Armor. “Listen, I know we already talked about this, but we just wanted to make sure you were completely okay with me and Shining getting married and--” She blinked, finally spotting Rainbow Dash with Cloud Kicker. “Oh. We didn’t realize you had company.” She smiled as she placed an odd emphasis on the last word.

Shining Armor coughed, looking incredibly awkward. “I guess we came at a bad time--though I guess this does answer our question anyway…”

“Huh?” Rainbow’s face flushed crimson and she realized what they were thinking and she quickly shoved Cloud’s wing off her. “It’s not what it looks like!”

“Of course it isn’t,” Cadance said soothingly, her tone clearly disbelieving. “It’s none of my business, but you two look so cute together!”

Shining chuckled as Dash sputtered. “Reminds me of when Twily used to interupt us.”

“B-but, she was just making me feel better!” Rainbow yelped.

That caused Shining Armor to blush and cover his ears. “I don’t need to hear this…”

“But--”

“Lalalala, not listeniiing!” He loudly proclaimed as he retreated from the room.

Cadance chuckled. “I’ll make sure you two aren’t, hmm, disturbed.” With a giddy grin, she trotted out of the room.

Rainbow Dash groaned and collapsed back on the bed. “My life is ruined.”

Cloud Kicker patted her back comfortingly, careful not to do anything too intimate that would make Rainbow uncomfortable. “Relax, you big foal. Besides, it got your mind off the Changelings for a bit, didn’t it?”

“I guess,” Dash grumbled.

“Don't worry Rainbow, everything'll work out,” Cloud assured her. “We can clear this up after you save the day again.” She paused before tentatively asking, “I know the timing stank, but are you okay with them getting married? I mean—”

“It’s fine,” Dash gave her a look. “Me and Shiny and Cadance settled all this way back in the Frozen North. Cadance has always been like a big sister and Shiny, I guess, like a big brother. So I’m not losing them or anything. I’m happy for them.”

Cloud patted her back. “That’s really mature of you—you sure you’re not a Changeling?” She teased. Rainbow’s response as a pillow to the face. “All right, all right, bad joke. Anyway, I’m glad for you. If anypony deserves to have a happily ever after, it’s them.” Cloud grinned, leaning in to run her hoof gently on Dash’s wing. “But speaking of happy endings...”

Rainbow smacked her with a pillow.

Chapter 10

“Rainbow Dash, I really don’t think I have the time for this—” Twilight tried to protest once again, but quailed under Rainbow’s piercing glare. To use Dinky’s analogy, it had been like herding cats to get all of her friends to the bachelorette party. They had all grumbled and fussed and mentioned how very busy they all were. It made Rainbow consider bringing them all in on leashes, but she abandoned that plan. She didn’t want to give Cloud Kicker any ideas.

“Twilight…” Rainbow none-too gently placed her hooves on Twilight’s rear and pushed her forward. “I’ve already gone over this five times today and am not in the mood to do it twice with you. You are going to the bachelorette party, you will relax and have a nice time, and that is final.”

Twilight turned her head back to face Rainbow. “But—my schedule!” She magicked her wedding schedule scroll up and waved it about. “The wedding!”

“Don’t care!” Rainbow shrugged. “This is no time to think about weddings—it’s the bachelorette party and everypony is waiting!”

A pain filled groan escaped from Twilight’s lips. “Please tell me this is going to be a civilized party for royalty?”

“You could say that.” Rainbow allowed as she opened the door to the club she’d rented. Almost immediately, Rainbow and Twilight were assaulted by a loud pulsing beat of music that made their hearts beat louder in their chests.

Vinyl Scratch had one hoof up to her ear while flipping through records, her horn flaring almost as brightly as some of the glowsticks around her neck. She threw Dash a salute and pumped her free hoof in the air. Derpy was walking about with a tray of muffins on her back, offering them to Rainbow’s other friends. Cadance was talking to Cloud Kicker, which made Rainbow fidget with worry. Cadance spotted her and waved her to join the two of them. Fortunately, Dash was saved by the intervention of her friends.

Pinkie Pie hopped around the club, looking and acting a lot more like herself. “Woohoo! Party!”

“Ah don' think this is th'typical one yew go for, Pinkie...” Applejack drawled as she and others clustered around a table. She cast a critical look around. “You neither, Rainbow.”

Pinkie stuck her tongue out at Applejack. “Why not? It's got 'party' right in the name, right? And it has games, and food, and guests--ooh, and surprises!”

“A party's a party, I guess.” Dash shrugged as she led Twilight to her seat. “Besides, Derpy and Cloud did help a little.” She grinned toothily at her friends as she waved a hoof at the celebrations. “Now, who's ready to get their party on, Dash style?”

Twilight’s face lit up in a monster blush as Fluttershy hid behind Rarity, mumbling. “Um, well, that is...”

Deciding to take pity on Fluttershy, Rarity cleared her throat. “‘Dash style?’ What precisely did you have in mind?”

“Is that like some kinda flyin' Missionary Style?” Applejack snerked, a tell-tale blush on her cheeks indicating that she’d been rather generous in helping herself to the drinks while waiting for Rainbow to fetch Twilight.

Pinkie Pie giggled while Rarity let out a huff that was one-part scandalized and another part-offended. “Applejack! Must you be so crude?”

“Whut?” Applejack hiccupped. “Ain' no point in dancin' around the issue with fancy talk an' yew-phamisms.”

“Still, you could at least try to act like a proper lady, for once in your life.” Rarity draped a hoof over her face despairingly.

Applejack’s rolled her eyes in response. “Already tried it once back when Ah was a filly. Ah didn't much care for it. Way Ah sees it, you gotta let them stuffed shirts know yew won’t take any of their horseapples if you don’t want ‘em to walk all over you. Like that Ramsay idjit.”

Rarity sniffed. “That’s easy for somepony whose business doesn’t rely on actual interactions with other ponies, much less their input.”

“I get input all the time,” Applejack snorted derisively. “S'just that I happen to be right most times than not. Ah got customers askin’ fer apples at odd seasons and have to explain why y'cant rush sweetness. At least I know how t'put mah blood, sweat n' tears int’ ma produce.”

“That would explain the taste,” Rarity drawled. “And for your information, I’ve pricked my hooves many a time creating my designs.”

Applejack grunted as she pulled another swig of her drink. “Sounds like ya need a different kind of prick, if’n you ask me…”

“Well, I most certainly did not!” Rarity snapped irritably, her face flushing in anger. “And for all your blood, sweat and tears you seem to making very little headway in your wedding duties.” She sniffed again. “Perhaps if you were to resolve your issues with Chef Ramsay, you might get somewhere. I think you’re the one feeling a touch ‘pent up’ and do for a roll in the hay, as you might put it?”

Her response was a blistering stream of apple-flavored invective. “That’s the most ree-diculous idea Ah ever heard! Ah cain’t stands that varmint! Anyways, between Ramsay, Fluttershy giving mah food to her little critters and Pinkie Pie’s lollygagging, it’s a wonder I’m as far along as I am!”

“Hey!” Pinkie frowned. “I have to keep changing all my party plans because the fancy ponies weren’t happy--and Rarity wasn’t helping!”

“Well, it’s hardly my fault if your normal parties are hardly in vogue with the latest noble trends!” Rarity huffed. “I might have had more time to win them over if I wasn’t drowning in half-finished dresses because Fluttershy was too busy with her animals friends to help with the sewing like she promised!”

Fluttershy twitched her wings. “T-that’s not fair, Rarity! Making friends with animals take a lot of work, especially when they’re so hungry and starving and Applejack won’t share any food with them!”

Applejack stomped a hoof. “I’m catering for a wedding! Buy some animal chow from--from--wherever you buy animal chow from and leave mah food alone!”

Twilight groaned and brought out her checklist. “So behind schedule…”

“ENOUGH!” Rainbow Dash took to the air so she could look down on all of them. “This is why we need tonight! We’re getting all stressed out and lame and we’re supposed to be helping Cadance, not making everything all complicated for her.” She rubbed her face. “How about we all take a deep breath, have some drinks and just chill? Otherwise, I’ll bring in some clouds and have it snow on all of you.”

Cadance made her way over, flanked by Derpy and Cloud. “Girls, I know things are tough. A wedding, especially a royal wedding for the Grand Galloping Gala—is stressful. Shining Armor and I have been so busy talking to dignitaries and reintegrating the Crystal Empire into the rest of the world that we haven’t been able to spend as much time with you as we would have liked. I want to thank you all for all the hard work you’re doing. That’s why we’re here.” She looked around, smiling kindly. “This is my gift to you, for all that you’ve done for me. Now please, relax and enjoy yourselves. Everything will work out. I know it will.”

The tension seemed to dissipate as the group offered their thanks to Cadance, and broke up into ones and twos to sample the refreshments or simply walk around and investigate the party.

Rainbow Dash looked over to Fluttershy and Twilight, who had remained nearby. “So how’re you ladies doing? Hanging in there?”

Fluttershy was doing her best to remain as small and unnoticeable as possible. “I'm ... fine.” Twilight nodded in agreement, smiling rather unconvincingly. Rainbow noticed the two of them looking rather tense.

Twilight paced back and forth, fretting nervously. “This is the most important day of my brother and sister-in-law-to-be's lives. and you are all just sitting around to music drinking fermented beverages. Have you all forgotten the plan?!” Rainbow’s eyebrow rose slightly at that, but Twilight’s next words made her sigh. “It all needs to be storybook perfect!”

“Twi, y'need to calm down. Relax.” Rainbow encouraged, the irony of her anypony to relax apparently lost on her. “It’s a party.”

Cloud Kicker nodded as she guided Twilight over to a table. “I think somepony needs a stallion massage. I can show you a few—”

“Oh no you don’t.” Applejack quickly moved to intercept them and give Cloud Kicker the stink eye. “Still, she has a point, Twilight. Never gonna do no pony no good to wind up that tight. Have a drink.”

Rarity nodded as she stepped up, sipping a Manehattan. “Well I must agree. Isn't this also a part of the tradition?”

“Yeah!” Pinkie Pie scarfed down a cupcake and bounced over, giving each of her friends additional confections. “Shiny’s also having a super duper special party too. We can’t be left out, riiiight?”

Twilight’s face went stone rigid for a moment. Then with lightning fast speed she grabbed the nearest drink off the table and downed it. “I don’t wanna think about it!” She wheezed, coughing slightly.

Making her way over, Princess Cadance smiled. “There you are! We were waiting for you, Twilight. Now we get to see what Rainbow Dash has planned.” She paused, looking to the pegasus in question and blushing at the wicked grin on her face. “I’d really be more comfortable if you were with me, Twilight. We’re going to be sisters-in-law after all.”

“But--the wedding plans!” Twilight’s hooves danced up and down. “I can’t just--the list!”

Cadance stuck out her lip in a pout and put on the saddest face she could make. “Please, Twilight, for me? Just try and enjoy yourself. I know you’re nervous--I am too--but this party is supposed to help everypony relax. I don’t think I could relax if you weren’t here with me.”

Pinkie nodded in agreement. “Parties are serious business.”

Ignoring her, Cadance pressed her hooves together pleadingly. “Pleeease? Just one night with no lists, just fun with your old foalsitter before her big wedding?”

“Well…” Twilight fidgeted. “Can I still hold onto it? Just in case?” She cradled her checklist against her like a mother with her foal.

“Of course.” Cadance nuzzled her. “Come on, let’s go get our party on!”

Rainbow Dash rubbed her face, grateful for Cadance’s assistance. I need to get my friends to relax or—if they’re the changeling—at least have to pretend to relax so they’ll lower their guard. Remembering some of her own experiences at past parties, she quickly remembered the best way to do that. “C’mon and relax, everypony. Have a drink!” She quickly grabbed two glasses of…something off the table and held them out.

“Oh, um, well, thank you Rainbow Dash but I don’t know—” Fluttershy took a half-step behind Twilight. “I wouldn’t want to get, um, you know...”

“Drunk?” Rainbow snorted. “Come on, you don’t have to go all Applejack on us,” she jerked her head towards the farmpony as she refilled her cup. “Just enough to loosen up a little.” She smiled when she saw Twilight took a fresh glass from the table with her magic and take a sip. “See, Twilight’s getting into it!”

Twilight coughed, sputtering as finished her sip. “Oh my Celestia....”

“Oh goodness. Are you alright, Twilight?” Fluttershy asked. “How many hooves am I holding up?”

Applejack chuckled, as she walked over, clapping Twilight on the back. “This here's a proper fer this party--careful yew don't overdo it, it ain't as watered down as some stuff.”

“Maybe I'll just ... not have that.” Twilight wheezed as she gave her drink another sniff. “Ooh, no, not that one again.”

Applejack gave the drink a sample sniff and taste herself. “Hooey, there's yer problem, startin' off with high-proof applejack.” She grabbed another drink, pouring Twilight a cup. “Mah namesake's got almost as much a kick as ah do.”

“Yet it lacks the enormous backside.” Rainbow snarked as she tried the drink herself … and instantly regretted it.

“It also don’t make boasts it can’t keep,” Applejack shot back with a smirk.

“Right…” Twilight said slowly as she swirled her drink. “I'll just ... sip this. Slowly. And keep a watch on the clock, so I can get a rough estimate for how much time my liver would need to process the alcohol.” Pinkie Pie then took her glass and replaced it with a sippy cup. Twilight’s expression was equal parts amusement and annoyance—a common reaction to Pinkie Pie. “Really?”

Pinkie seemed to miss the subtext. “What? These are GREAT for parties! You can get as smashed as you like and never lose a drop!” She rubbed her muzzle. “Hmm, maybe I should replace all the glasses at the wedding reception with these…”

If that’s not Pinkie Pie, then they must picked the most random changeling ever to replace her, Rainbow thought.

“Maybe it would be best if she was a bit more careful than that?” Fluttershy offered. “I mean, I’m sure you can handle yourself Twilight, but—”

Applejack snorted. “Ah think ol' Twi knows what she's doin'. An' a big part o' that's startin' off knowin' yer limits, like havin' th' weaker stuff fer beginners.”

“You could be a little more considerate of Twilight's history...” Rarity hissed softly, but not so low that she couldn’t be heard by everypony nearby.

That threw Applejack for a moment. “What're yew goin—” she blinked as she remembered, shuffling her hooves awkwardly.

“It's fine!” Twilight blurted out quickly. “I've already got a rough estimate going for how much of which drinks I can try, with a large margin of error.” She took another sip to prove it. “Really, it's okay.”

That made Applejack relax. “S’long as yer havin’ fun, that’s what matters.”

“And I think it is better to be safe than sorry,” Rarity countered, daintily sipping at her own drink.

The half-lidded stare Applejack gave Rarity said it all. “Ain’t that your third glass?”

“Have you been counting?” Rarity replied in a challenging tone.

“Somepony’s gotta make sure y’all don’t hornswaggle all the best stuff.”

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Speaking of…” She looked to Fluttershy. “C’mon, it’s a party! We can all relax and have some fun for a change! I mean, we've all been so tense this week, it's about time we all got to relax and enjoy ourselves, amiright?”

“Exactly!” Twilight nodded. “Nice, safe, enjoyable and un-stressful fun.”

Whatever Fluttershy was about to say was lost when Applejack whinnied. “Eeeexactly!” She nodded. “See, even Rainbow’s talkin’ sense for a change!” Rainbow made a mental note to prank Applejack for that later. And if that was the changeling, to punch it extra hard. Applejack hip bumped Fluttershy. “G’on! S’one thing Ah cain’t stand at a party, it’s an empty hoof that needs a mug!” Don' worry none--if this were any more watered down, Ah could pack it in Apple Bloom's lunch.”

“Well … maybe I’ll get something nice and, um, safe.” She examined the list of drinks on the board. “Oh, Honey Bunny! That sounds nice!” Fluttershy timidly accepted the cup and took the tiniest of tiny sips. “Oh my. This tastes really … good.” She took another, slightly larger drink.

Rainbow Dash stepped back and watched her friends. I’ve been going about this the wrong way. Instead of investigating my friends one at a time, I need to watch them interact with each other—see who the others think is acting off. And so far…nopony seemed to stand out. Twilight and Fluttershy were slowly getting coaxed into joining the party by Pinkie Pie, Applejack and Rarity were bickering in their weird, half-friendly way.

I have to figure this out tonight—the wedding’s the day after tomorrow! Rainbow looked around.

The lights in the club dimmed and all attention was directed to the still-lit stage. “Guess the show’s about to start.” Rainbow called to her friends. Twilight and Fluttershy fidgeted, obviously very keen to watch while not wanting to make it obvious that they were interested. Rarity elegantly arched her brow as she moved closer, her own excitement betrayed by the slight swishing of her elegantly coifed tail. Pinkie Pie … was munching on a bag of popcorn that she had acquired in the last minute, despite there being no popcorn at the party. Rainbow didn’t even question it, except to note that if Pinkie was the fake, it was a very good fake.

Applejack walked up to Rainbow and nudged her. “This oughta be good…”

Dash just grinned. “Oh you have no idea. Me and Cloud made sure to find some great ponies to, ah, entertain Cadance.” Rainbow waved to the bachelorette, who waved back from her place of honor at the foot of the stage.

“Oh dear.” Twilight mumbled, blushing as she buried her snout into her drink, not able to resist taking the occasional glance up. Fluttershy’s own expression was one to match Twilight’s.

“Well, this should certainly be interesting...” A gleam in Rarity’s eyes belied her even tone. Music began to play as movement appeared behind the stage’s curtains. There was a hushed silence…and then Big Macintosh stepped out, dressed in a sweater-vest and bowtie, the standard attire of the Ponytones Quartet.

Applejack’s jaw dropped so quickly Rainbow was afraid it would become detached. She opened her mouth—no doubt to cry out her brother’s name in shocked disbelief—but all that emerged was a tiny noise that sounded not unlike a mouse being trod on by a manticore as her cheeks exploded into a bright blush.

Rainbow bit her lip, trying to suppress her laughter. That lasted for all of five seconds. “BWAHAHA!” She flopped over on her back, holding herself and howling with laughter at the look on AJ’s face. When Big Macintosh spotted his sister—and noticed the surroundings he was in—he started blushing just as hard.

“Oh dear…” Rarity snerked in amusement as their other friends started giggling at the agog expression on the Apple siblings faces.

Applejack found her voice first. “....eenope!” She grabbed the nearest drink to her and chugged it down. “Ah'm still too sober fer this horseapples.” She proceeded to steal every drink at the table and down them in record time before trotting off to find more.

“Aww, don't go! Don't you wanna see your brother shake his groove thing for Cadance?” Rainbow laughed, holding her aching sides.

Applejack finished another glass of her namesake. “Shuddup RD! Jes--shut it!” She grabbed a drink out of another pony’s hooves and downed it. “Hoo, that one tasted like toothpaste.” She gagged as she retreated further from the stage.

The grin on Dash’s face only got wider as Applejack withdrew. “He’s not here like that,” she explained to the rest of her friends. “I just asked him to come by and sing. Of course, I maaay have forgotten to tell him what kind of party this was.”

“Oh, that was ingenious.” Rarity chortled, appreciative of a good joke—that wasn’t on her.

Twilight shook her head at Rainbow, trying to look angry but failing. “Rainbow? You're evil. Totally. Evil.”

“Aww, you say the nicest things, Twi.” Rainbow smirked as she bumped her hip playfully against Twilight’s. “Oh geeze, the look on Applejack's face—”

Pinkie Pie bounced up, holding a camera that dangled down from a curl in her mane. “I got a picture. That'll last us for years.”

“It was pretty funny...” Fluttershy admitted, a warm flush on her cheeks as she giggled.

That seemed to be the straw that broke Twilight’s resolve as her hard-maintained frown turned into a full-on laugh. “BAH-hahahahaha! Oh, I shouldn't laugh but I can't help it!”

“Oh, that was a wonderful trick on Applejack.” Rarity chuckled.

Rainbow Dash shook her head. “Twilight letting in her inner prankster out? Rarity developing a ‘low-brow’ sense of humor? Who are you two and what’ve you done with my friends?” She kept her tone light, but watched both their faces for any reaction.

Twilight just chuckled and rubbed her face. “That was … I should feel bad, but that was hilarious.”

“The look on Applejack's face...” Rarity agreed, closing her eyes and smiling. She was going to never let Applejack forget this. “Which way did she go?”

“I think Applejack went that way.” Pinkie offered, pointing a hoof towards the door. “Or else that way.” She pointed a second hoof towards the bar. “Or else maybe that way.” Yet another hoof rose and pointed to the mare’s room. “I kinda didn't notice since I was watching the show.”

Rainbow Dash quickly looked down to check that Pinkie was still balancing on her hindlegs. So where did that third foreleg come from? She wondered, idly wondering if she had been drinking too much. Or possibly not enough.

She was shaken out of her thoughts by applause as Big Macintosh finished singing. The large pony bowed his head, looking flustered as Cadance blew him a kiss. He quickly made his way off stage as quickly as he could, shooting a glance at Rainbow. Her response was to smile cheekily and crack up all over again.

While thinking about going over to needle Big Mac some more, Rainbow found herself victim of a surprise hug from Cadance. “Dashie, this party is wonderful!” Cadance giggled, her pink cheeks glowing brighter. “You and your friends have done an amazing job!”

“It’s what I do,” Dash hugged her back. “You doing okay?” She felt guilty for not having spent more time with her old foalsitter before the big day, even though she had her investigation and wedding preparations to take care of.

“Well,” Cadance looked around, making sure they had some privacy. “I was feeling just the tiniest-tinyest bit nervous. But I feel a lot better now.”

“That’s great!” Rainbow felt herself relax a fraction. At least something was going right. She winked to Cloud Kicker as she made her way over to them. “So enjoying the entertainment, Cadance?” Dash grinned, nodding to the stallions who had come out to dance after Big Macintosh left. She nudged Cloud. “I had Kicker pick up the best dancing talent in Canterlot. Of course she knew most of them…” Cloud’s grin was shameless and unapologetic.

“Er ... yes.” Cadance coughed. “It's nice, though I'm a bit surprised you picked something so ... risque.” She flushed as looked out over the party: pegai stallions gently fluttering their wings, blowing stiff breezes in Fluttershy and Pinkie’s faces. Earth ponies danced around poles and a madly giggling Rarity was draped over the back of a large unicorn stallion.

“Th-this is not how a lady rides!” Rarity shifted herself so that she was sitting side saddle. “Much better!” She reached out and levitated Applejack’s hat over, putting it on at a jaunty angle. “Onward!”

Applejack shook her hoof at Rarity from the back of her own stallion. “Give me mah hat back!” She nudged her ride forward. “Onward, mighty steed! After her!”

The hapless stallion could only blink at her and asked, “How’d you know my name?”

Cloud grinned a little wider. “That's my good influence.”

Rainbow just rolled her eyes. “Hey, it's what you're supposed to do for a bachelorette party, right?” She chuckled, nudging Cadance in the ribs. “And it is funny watching you blush and drool.”

“I was not drooling.” Cadance huffed, tilting her head up imperiously.

That just made Dash laugh. “Oh admit it Cadey, you were eyeing a lot of flank tonight.”

Cadance harumphed. “Sorry, I'm a one-stallion mare.”

“It’s just looking,” Cloud pointed out. “As long as you don't touch you're safe. It’s like window shopping. Only with more muscles.”

“Careful Cade, I think you're speaking a language foreign to Cloud. I don’t think she can understand.” Rainbow snarked. Cloud Kicker nudged her with her wing.

Cadance watched the two of them with a quirked brow. “Though speaking of eyeing flank, I'll note that Cloud Kicker's been rather ... attentive of you.”

The two mares blushed. “Princess!” Cloud squawked.

Rainbow sputtered for a second before getting out, “S-she's just been helping me with the party and stuff!”

“Of course she is,” Cadance smiled understandingly.

“That's dumb. You're being dumb.” Rainbow stomped her hoof. “Stop being dumb, Cadance.”

Cadance winked. “Uh huh. Sure Rainbow…”

Growling to herself, Rainbow threw up her hooves and stomped away. She soon found Cloud Kicker trotting up beside her, draping a wing over her back. “Whoa, calm down, Dash.”

She hastily shrugged Cloud’s wing off, not wanting to give Cadance any more ammunition. “I am calm!” She snapped at Cloud.

Cloud Kicker winced, looking stung. “Rainbow…” her voice faltered. She cleared her throat and tried again. “Are you okay? You’re … pretty tense.”

“Yeah, the end of the world tends to make me a bit tense,” Rainbow’s voice practically dripped with sarcasm. “I'm kinda weird like that.” She sighed when she caught sight of the hurt look on her friend’s face. “Sorry. I’m just … really not in the mood to deal with Cadance playing matchmaker when we've got a changeling on the loose, pretending to be one of my friends. I mean, facing Nightmare Moon and King Sombra was different. I had my friends with beside me for almost the entire time, and I knew I could trust them to help me out. Now I can’t. I don’t know who to trust, where the bad guys are. Just point me at something to punch and I’m set. This--this cloak-and-dagger stuff is driving me nuts!”

“I know, but being stressed out won’t help.” Cloud reached out to put a hoof on her shoulder.

“No. The only thing that will help is finding out which of them's the fake. Anything else that isn't helping--isn't.”

Cloud sighed, slumping back a little. “Yeah, okay.”

Rainbow didn’t notice, already occupied in looking around, trying to keep track of everypony. “I'm gonna see how the others are behaving. You touch base with Derpy.”

“Yeah, sure.” Cloud closed her eyes and took a deep breath, focusing herself. “Okay, I'll get to work on that. Good luck.”

“Thanks. I'll need it,” Dash grunted as she trotted her way over to Twilight, who was sitting at a table furiously scribbling something on a notepad.

Rainbow approached the table without Twilight so much as looking in her direction. She cleared her throat. “Twilight? What're you doing?”

“Making sure I'm not drunk.” Twilight’s response was so casual that it took Rainbow a minute to realize that she had heard that correctly.

When she did, she fought the urge to facehoof. “So, you’re making sure you aren’t drunk … by doing math.”

“Exactly!” Twilight beamed, proud of herself. “I just need to calculate how much alcohol I've had against my weight and BMI…”

Rainbow waved a hoof to interrupt her. “Okay, first off: if you're doing math to see if you're drunk, that's a pretty good sign that you already are drunk. Second … lemme see that.” She snatched the notepad away to see what diabolical plans she might’ve been planning and--huh. So that was Twilight’s weight? “Twi, I think you need to start exercising with me.”

“Give me that!” Twilight grabbed her pad back. “My weight is perfectly fine and within the acceptable range for a pony of my size, age, gender and breed. What’s more, I’m sure I have a higher tolerance for alcohol than you do.” She looked Rainbow over. “I'd bet your body fat is at one percent or lower. You must be a real lightweight.”

“I'm no lightweight!” Rainbow protested indignantly.

Missing her tone, Twilight asked, “How much alcohol does it take to get you drunk? Cloud Kicker did mention you were always the first one in your Canterlot group to pass out.”

That set Rainbow’s ears on fire. “I was not! Cloud's a lying liar who--lies.” She blinked. “Wait, when were you talking with Cloud?”

“Oh, she mentioned it during the whole Trixie thing.” Twilighted paused, glanced at Rainbow and flushed. “She talks about you a lot.”

“Huh? Cloud?” Rainbow’s face flushed too as she thought of Cadance’s remarks. “We're not--whatever you’re thinking, it's nothing.”

Twilight giggled tipsily at Rainbow’s reddened cheeks. “Cloud told me that--” she paused, stuffing her hooves in her mouth.

“She told you what?” Rainbow asked, leaning in.

Twilight opened her mouth--only for Pinkie Pie’s head to emerge from under the table with a shout of “FOREVER!”

“Gyah! Pinkie!” Dash yelped in surprise. Twilight took one look at Pinkie, to her math, then reached for her drink again. “Pinkie what are--what're you---oh never mind.” Rainbow rubbed her face.

Pinkie gently led Rainbow Dash around from the thoroughly confused Twilight as she returned to her drink. “Nothing to see here. These aren't the ponies you're looking for, move along.” Dash frowned at Pinkie’s nonsensical ramblings, not sure if she should be suspicious or just confused. Or both. Pinkie frowned at her. “No finding out secrets,” she insisted, looking serious.

“What secrets?” Rainbow narrowed her eyes. “What're you hiding?”

“I'm not hiding anything, but Twi's terrible at keeping secrets!” Pinkie explained. “...or was that a secret?” She gasped and took a cupcake out of her mane and smushed it in her eye. Ignoring the confused/appalled expression on Rainbow’s face, she went on. “Anyway, no trying to get them! Secrets are serious business!”

Rainbow leaned in. “But are friends supposed to keep secrets from each other? What if it's important?” She tried to stay cool, but this could be what she was looking for!

Pinkie shook her head. “Breaking promises to your friends is the fastest way to lose your friends forever!”

“But--”

“FOREVER!” Pinkie shouted.

“Grr! This is important!” Rainbow yelled back, grabbing Pinkie Pie’s shoulders and shaking her a little. “You have to tell me everything you know!”

Pinke shrugged her hooves off. “No, Rainbow Dash! You can't break promises! No destroying our friendship, Dashie!”

“You're the one destroying our friendship with your secrets and lies!” Rainbow shouted at her. “That's all it is with you ponies!” Growling angrily, Pinkie stomped off, making Dash realize that she’d pushed too hard. “Hold up, Pinkie--!”

However, she soon found her path blocked by Fluttershy. “Is everything alright here?”

Rainbow grumbled as she tried, unsuccessfully, to step around her. “It's fine 'Shy, just go enjoy the party…”

“I am enjoying it,” Fluttershy smiled, a tipsy look on her face. “These Honey Bunnies are ... nice.” She leaned against Rainbow Dash. “So, I was thinking…”

“Yeah? About what?”

Fluttershy took a breath and hurriedly blurted out. “If you don't want Cloud Kicker can I have her?”

Rainbow blinked. “What.”

“Can I tell you a secret?” Fluttershy hiccuped. “I had a huuuge crush on her back in Flight Camp.” She giggled drunkenly. “Huuuge. I like that word. Huuuge.”

Rainbow Dash brought a hoof up to her face. “Fluttershy, are you drunk?”

“Oh no, not at all,” Fluttershy waved her off, sloshing her drink over Rainbow. “Well, except yes. Maybe. A little.” Rainbow planted her face in both her hooves. Fluttershy giggled. “Huuuuge crush.”

“That's … really something, Fluttershy.” Rainbow sighed.

Fluttershy giggled drunkenly, her ears perking up when she heard the music start up again. “Oooh dancers! Come on, Rainbow!” She grabbed her friend and hauled her over to the seats in front of the stage. “I want to see!”

Sighing, Rainbow let herself get dragged over, sitting beside Applejack and Rarity as the dancers came on stage. Fluttershy leaned forward, eyes wide as several large, muscular stallions dressed as a train crew began to shake and writhe in front of a madly blushing Cadance.

“Oooh hello.” Twilight quirked her brow appraisingly from her own seat.

Rainbow grinned and murmured just loud enough for her friends to hear. “Twi likes big flanks, and she cannot lie...”

Twilight sprayed out her drink with a loud squeak. “Rainbow! I do not!” The blush on her cheeks undercut her denial.

Fluttershy let out a quiet giggle. “I think they have very nice cabooses too…” she gasped. “Did I really just say ‘caboose’?”

Cloud Kicker blinked as a pony in a guard uniform began dancing. “Huh. I guess now I know why he’s called ‘Flash’ Sentry … and here I always thought he was a prude.”

Rarity was practically hanging off of Applejack, using her to prop herself up as she gushed over the dancers. “Did you see that one crystal pony? Did you see the cut of his flank?” she tittered, clearly plastered.

“S-s’long as Ah don’t have to see no kin of mine up there,” Applejack hiccupped, swaying slightly. “Ah’m happy. As fer me, he looked like one of those fra-gee-ley glasses that break the moment ya try to drink from one.”

Rarity waved a hoof dismissively. “Oh goodness, Fluttershy, support me here.” When the timid yellow pegasus didn’t speak up, Rarity blinked and looked around. “Fluttershy? Has anypony seen where she is?”

“Um…” Twilight pointed to the stage. The others looked up to see Fluttershy draping herself across the shoulders of a panicked looking stallion, clinging to the straps of his overalls.”

“You’re going to LOVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” She loudly proclaimed, rivaling the infamous Canterlot Royal Voice.

Cloud Kicker winced and nodded to Derpy. She nodded back as they climbed up on stage to extract the poor stallion from Fluttershy’s grip. Fluttershy flung her hooves out and moved to hug Cloud. “Huuuge!” However, in her inebriated state she tripped and fell against Derpy, hugging and nuzzling her--much to Derpy’s chagrin.

“Ooookay, hello,” Derpy murmured. “I think it’s time to get off the stage and let other ponies have their fun, mm?”

Fluttershy mumbled something in her ear that, while inaudible to the rest of the establishment, made Derpy’s cheeks flush as red as the apples on AJ’s … er, cheeks. She hoisted her friend onto her back without another word, although she did squeak a little as Fluttershy kept talking to her.

Once they were off the stage, it was time for the main event. “All right everypony, time for the cake!” Pinkie Pie whooped as she wheele in truly mammoth cake. “Princess Cadance, I think you know what comes next...”

Cadance blushed brilliantly, but was still smiling as the cake came to a halt in front of her. “Oh goodness, I wonder whatever you could mean.” Her horn shimmered as a cake knife floated up. “We better dig in!”

Everypony cheered--just as Pinkie Pie exploded out of the cake. “Whoa!” she gasped, shaking the icing out of her mane. “Aww, I thought it was supposed to be bigger on the inside!”

“Wait, Pinkie Pie?” Cadance blinked. “But you--how did--when did you get in there?! And--what are you wearing?”

Pinkie nodded, her head encased in an oversized outfit made to look like a goofy version of Shining Armor’s head. “What? I thought you were supposed to like the pony who pops out of the cake? And I figured, who better than the pony you’re marrying? Except not really him, because that’d just make the party awkwaaard.”

“Too late…” Twilight moaned. She looked at her drink and then slowly spilled it out on the floor. “I think I’ve had enough.”

Rarity agreed. “Perhaps we should all … partake a little less.”

“Woo hoo…” Fluttershy softly exclaimed, propped up against Applejack.

Rainbow Dash just shook her head. Her friends. There wasn’t anypony else like them in all of Equestria. The way they acted, how they worked off of each other. You couldn’t recreate that chemistry: the ties that bond them, the spark that emerged when all of them were together. Even if it was something as silly as a party.

That’s when she came to a decision. She was going to see Princess Celestia tomorrow and give a report of her findings.

Chapter 11

The next morning, Rainbow Dash woke up feeling refreshed for the first time that week. It was like all the stress and tension that had continually kept her on edge had just faded away. No more deliberating, guessing, snooping or second-guessing; just action. She knew what course to take and she was going to take it. She’d prefer to act, even if it meant possibly making a mistake, than wait and endlessly deliberate and debate with yourself over what maybe-possibly-could-sort of-perhaps be the right choice.

She made her way from the wing of the castle she and the others were staying in to the throne room. Rainbow just felt lighter, and even managed to have something like a spring in her step. She nodded to that guard she’d almost attacked the other day, who just looked at her, clearly trying to reconcile this with his last encounter with her.

Rainbow grinned and saw a clearly bedraggled Derpy and Cloud Kicker trying to keep up with an excited group of kids. She stopped and headed over. “Hey, kids.”

Six pairs of eyes widened as they looked on the pony widely acclaimed (by them) to be the coolest pony in Ponyville. They cheered and bore down upon her. “Rainbow Dash!”

Dinky galloped ahead of the herd and leaped up for a hug, ending up neatly caught in Rainbow’s forelegs. “Hi!” She hugged her godmother tight. “Mommy and Miss Cloud were showing us the castle and it’s. So. Cool!”

“Heh, glad you like it, kiddo.” She gave the others a wave with her wing. “How’s it going fillies? And Pip?”

“Awesome!” They shouted back, Scootaloo easily out-yelling the others as she stepped in front of them. “Pinkie Pie threw this amazing party in the castle for us and we got to listen to awesome music and hide inside these really cool suits of armor and then we went outside and saw these really weird looking statues in the garden and--” Apple Bloom’s hoof abruptly cut off Scootaloo’s gushing.

Dinky nodded. “And we got to see some of ‘lula’s family in the guards, but we couldn’t really talk to them cuz they were being all store-icky. Wutever that means. Like this!” She gave her best super-serious-stoney face. “They were almost like the statues in the garden! And the statues look so. Darn. REAL!” Dinky thought for a moment. “Miss Princess doesn't have any creepy stoney spells, does she?”

Rainbow snorted. “No Dinky, I promise you the Princess doesn’t make anypony get stoned.” She grinned and set her down. “But that all sounds really—wait, Pinkie threw a party for you?” She looked up to Cloud and Derpy, who shrugged. Confusion reigned on Dash’s face. “She was with us last night. How could she throw two parties at the same time in two totally different places and—it’s Pinkie Pie, why am I even asking at this point?” She sighed, rubbing her muzzle with her hoof. “Anyway, that sounds really cool. Buuut I know of something even cooler. Wanna see?”

“YEAH!” Dinky cheered as the others nodded.

“Follow me kids--and that includes you two big kids,” she dipped her head to Cloud and Derpy, “and I'll show you the most awesome thing in the castle.”

Cloud Kicker rolled her eyes and deadpanned. “Says the biggest kid in the group.”

“She does project a bit, doesn't she?” Derpy chimed in.

Rainbow just snorted and tossed her mane. “You are so jealous, Cloud. It's just sad…” she shook her head slowly. “Isn't it 'lula?”

Cloud’s little sister nodded and grinned mischievously. “Rainbow's way cooler.” Cloud feigned being cut to the quick, clutching at her heart.

The other foals were quick to agree. “Yah-HUH she is!” Dinky nodded importantly.

“She's the coolest. Pony. EVER!” Scootaloo proclaimed.

Pip hopped up. “She’s amazing!”

Apple Bloom tilted her head. “She ain't bad,” she shrugged, knowing that nopony could beat out her sister and brother.

“Well Rarity--” Sweetie Belle started before trailing off, thinking hard for a moment. “--has a really nice mane!”

Giving her friends a superior looking smirk, Rainbow chuckled. “Majority rules, guys. Come on, follow me!” She flew up in the air, did a swift victory lap over the heads of the eagerly watching kids, and then zoomed down a nearby hallway.

Cloud Kicker shook her head as the kids each followed Rainbow Dash in their own unique way: from Dinky’s happy hopping to Alula’s flying, Pip’s quick scramble to keep up with the longer-legged ponies and the stampede like run of the others. “And then Rainbow's head grew three sizes that day,” she commented dryly to Derpy.

If Rainbow heard her, she gave no sign. “Okay, and we're walking and we're walking…” she gestured to the foals, leading them down the corridors of the castle. “So, everypony having fun getting set for the wedding and stuff?”

Dinky nodded. “Yeah! I'm excited!”

“I get to hold the rings for the Princess and Captain Armor!” Pipsqueak tossed in.

“An' that's. So. COOL!” Dinky said. “The ring-bearer's rilly important, 'cuz ya can't have a wedding without rings!” She frowned. “Well, unless you use earrings, but they're not.”

“And our dresses are sooo pretty!” Sweetie squeaked. “My big sister made them special for us!”

Derpy nodded, giving her trademark wall-eyed smile. “And she did a wonderful job, too. You're going to look beautiful.”

Even while Sweetie Belle beamed happily, Scootaloo made gagging noises and Alula pouted. “I don't wanna look beautiful, I wanna look tough.”

“You said it.” Scootaloo agreed.

“I’m not wearing a dress, cuz I’m not a filly.” Pipsqueak pointed out with a grateful nod.

“Dummy can wear mine for me,” Alula grumbled.

Derpy struggled for a proper answer. “You'll look ... um...” she glanced briefly to Rainbow. “Dashing!”

“Heh, Dashing is pretty awesome.” Rainbow winked.

That made Alula and Scootaloo pause to think it over. They looked at one another, then nodded in agreement before looking back to Derpy. “Well, if we look like Rainbow Dash then it's okay.” Alula allowed.

“Speaking of…” Rainbow pointed to the hallway leading to the throne room. “Prepare for awesomeness.”

“Why?” Dinky tilted her head, then gasped. “Did Miss Princess make another you?!” Derpy rolled her eyes.

Rainbow grinned and made a grand sweeping motion with her wing and foreleg. The corridor walls were dominated by several large, ornate stained glass windows depicting key events in Equestrian history.

“Those’re some mighty big windows,” Apple Bloom observed. “Good thing nopony has to draw the blinds.”

“Hope nopony plays hoofball in the yard.” Pip commented.

“Or soccer!” Dinky added.

Pipsqueak frowned. “That is hoofball.”

“No, it isn’t!” Alula argued.

Before the argument could break out in full, Rainbow cleared her throat and tilted her head to a specific window. This one immediately drew the attention of every filly (and colt), for it was dominated by an image of Nightmare Moon. The Mare of Darkness was in the process of being enveloped by a bright rainbow emanating from six familiar mares.

Cloud nudged Rainbow. “So they didn't go for your design idea after all. Granted, you decking Nightmare Moon in the schnoz while everypony else cheers you on wouldn't look as good.”

“Aww, but that sounds cool!” Alula commented.

“It's still very pretty,” Derpy added. She missed seeing Rainbow Dash roll her eyes at Cloud Kicker before smacking her with a wing.

“It’s really nice!” Dinky hugged Rainbow’s leg tightly. “You showed her, huh?”

“An' Applejack did, too!” Apple Bloom added, a touch defensively.

The next window depicted the liberation of the Crystal Empire and the defeat of King Sombra. Sombra was surrounded by a ring made of Rainbow Dash and her friends. But around them was a ring of other ponies that included Cadance, Shining Armor and some very familiar-looking foals.

Derpy’s eyes straightened and went wide. “Muffin, you're on that window too!

Dinky gasped. “I am?!” She zipped over to look. Her eyes went wide too as she spied a pair of bushwoolies running away from the three foals. “That's. So. COOL!”

“Whoa!” Pip was similarly amazed. “Lookit 'lula! We're HEROES!”

“COOL!” Alula grinned, puffing up proudly.

Derpy hugged her daughter tight. “I'm so proud of you, Muffin. And I know your friends' families are proud of them too!”

“Aw ... now Ah wanna be on a stained glass window.” Apple Bloom looked dejected. “Do Ah have to punch a booshwoolie?”

Rainbow chuckled and winked. “Look again, you’re there.” She pointed to the foals with Cadance and Shining Armor. Sure enough, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were there.

Scootaloo’s eyes went wide and her jaw fell open in shock. “So … awesome…”

“Yep, you kids were all pretty awesome up there.” Rainbow nodded.

“Yaaay!” Sweetie cheered. “Wait'll Rarity sees this!”

Alula proudly stuck out her chest and grinned at Cloud. “I'm on a stained glass window, and you're not. Nyah!”

Dinky giggled. “Sparky's gonna be soooooooooo jealous!”

Derpy groaned good-naturedly. “Muffin…”

“Come on kids, don't pull a Rainbow on us.” Cloud snarked.

Rainbow Dash snorted. “They’re totally jealous, right kids?”

“Soooooooooooooooooo jealous.” Dinky giggled.

“More jelly than a piece o'toast!” Apple Bloom proclaimed.

Sweetie Belle nodded. “So jealous that they're um … really jealous!” She beamed. Scootaloo facehooved.

Chuckling, Rainbow pointed down another hallway. “I have to go do some stuff now. But down that way is the kitchens. Maybe they'll let you guys taste-test some of the treats for the wedding.” She paused. “But, uh, listen for any noise before you go in. If you hear them shouting stuff, come back later.” The last thing she needed was for them to learn any new words thanks to Chef Ramsay and Applejack. “Okay?”

“Ah-HUH! Thanks Rainbow!” Dinky hugged her. “I love you, ‘kay?”

It was times like this that made Rainbow really remember just why she loved being Dinky’s godmom. “You too Dinks. See you later kids.”

“Bye Rainbow!” Scootaloo beamed, not quite bold enough to try to go for a hug herself. “Can we watch you practice later?” Her pleading expression was mirrored by Alula’s.

“Heh, don’t see why not.” Rainbow winked. “See you kids later … that includes you two.” She smirked at Derpy and Cloud.

Cloud Kicker rolled her eyes. “That joke gets funnier every time you make it.”

“Much like your face.” Rainbow returned breezily as she waved them off, heading straight for the throne room.

She arrived at the door to the throne room and took a breath, straightening her shoulders. Piece of cake. I go in, I tell Celestia what I found, we make a new plan and we stomp the bugs. Easy-peasey one-two-threesie. She blinked. Gotta stop letting Pinkie Pie’s little rhymes get in my head. Once they get in, they’ll never leave.

The doors opened. Anxiousness and adrenaline gave speed to her movements, swiftly trotting inside. Princess Celestia sat upon her throne, the room strangely dark with all the windows and doors closed and the room empty of its usual guards and aides. “Princess Celestia? I need to talk to you.” Her voice echoed dimly off the walls.

Celestia gave a motherly smile and nodded, encouraging Rainbow to come closer. “Of course, Rainbow Dash. What is it?”

“It's about, well, the changeling business. I spent all week watching my friends to see which one of them was the imposter.

“Ah, yes. Very good, Rainbow Dash. And what have you discovered?” She leaned in slightly.

“Yeah,” Rainbow nodded. “I did what you said and—” she struggled briefly with finding just the right way to say it, but then decided it was better to just get it over and done with. “I don’t think any of my friends are changelings.” She blurted out, wincing slightly in anticipation of a rebuke.

The Princess didn’t say anything at first. Her smile contracted slightly’ as she took a deep breath and sighed. After a moment of silence, she softly murmured. “Yes, I suspected that might be the case.”

Rainbow was practically rocked back on her hooves, dumbfounded. “Y-you did?! But I spent days before I figured that!”

Celestia stood up and walked down from her throne, stopping just in front of Dash. “I have something to confess to you, Rainbow. I hope you won't judge me too harshly for it, but ... I have not been entirely honest with you.”

“W-what are you talking about?” Rainbow felt an icy pit open up in her stomach, even though she didn’t quite know why.

“There is one bearer of the Elements whose identity you haven't checked.” The princess informed her solemnly, lowering her head.

Rainbow’s eyes widened. “That’s impossible! I checked everypony! Is—is there a new Element of Harmony? Is that it? Who did I miss?”

Celestia met Rainbow’s gaze. “Yourself.”

Rainbow took a step back. “W-what?!”

“Yes,” Celestia nodded. “And I'm afraid the evidence uncovered by your own efforts at investigating your friends has proven that you are the changeling.”

“Y-your—that’s—!” That set Rainbow sputtering incoherently until she could get herself under control. “I’m not a changeling! That’s insane!”

All the princess did was shake her head and smile sadly. “And what better spy than one who doesn't even believe they're a spy?”

Rainbow felt her mind reel. “You’re wrong! I’m me! I’d know if I wasn’t me!”

“You must be confined, for the safety of my little ponies.” Her horn lit up and the doors closed behind Rainbow. “Please do not resist, I have no wish to harm you.” Her calm, soothing voice only contrasted all the more to how insane and impossible the situation was for Rainbow Dash.

“This is wrong! This is messed up!” She looked around frantically, the looming dark of the sealed off room only adding to her anxiety. “I'm the real Rainbow Dash! You gotta believe me!”

Princess Celestia’s face was impassive. “Are you? Let's put it to the test...” She gestured to a door on the far side of the room, which opened thanks to her magic. In walked Rainbow Dash’s friends, the other Element bearers.

Rainbow sighed in relief as she spotted them. “Guys! Oh thank the Wonderbolts! This is so nuts—you have to tell her that I'm me!” Her only response was stony silence and the steady clip-clops of hooves on the floor. They stopped beside the Princess, not offering Rainbow any of the usual warmth and friendship, but instead looking at her very warily. Dash’s wings drooped. “Guys?” she repeated weakly, almost begging.

Twilight looked down and shuffled her hooves. “The Princess explained everything to us, and ... you have been acting rather strangely, Rainbow.”

A frustrated scream of disbelief bubbled up from within the horror struck pegasus, but nothing came out. She was completely breathless.

“Don't call that thing Rainbow!” Applejack snapped irritably at Twilight. “It ain't Rainbow, it's just some kinda monster pretending to be her.” She turned to glare at Rainbow Dash, taking a challenging step forward.

Cringing, Rainbow stepped back. “B-but--But I am Rainbow!” She held her face in her hooves. “This can't be happening...”

“You have been acting really weird and nosey...” Pinkie Pie frowned, no sign of her typical mirth or bubbliness anywhere to be seen.

Fluttershy nervously twitched her wings before gently speaking up. “The Princess told us that you're a new kind of changeling, that really believes it's the pony it's pretending to be. Because that way, you'll be a better spy. So ... um ... I guess you haven't really done anything wrong, but we still want the real Rainbow Dash back.”

“I am Rainbow Dash!” she snapped angrily, stomping her hoof and spreading her wings aggressively. “I’m Rainbow feathering Dash!”

However all she accomplished was making Fluttershy give out a frightened squeak and hide behind Rarity. The prim unicorn cleared her throat. “Think about it, Rai—” she then spotted the glare Applejack was sending her way and amended herself, “Er ... you. Haven't you noticed a great many incongruities in your life lately?”

“Incon-what?” Rainbow closed her eyes. This is all a bad dream. Like showing up for the Wonderbolt tryouts without any wings. This can’t be real. This can’t be real, this can’t be real…

When she opened them again, Twilight had taken several steps forward. She had a sad, resigned look on her face. “I made a list of all the things you've done over the last week that seem improper for the real Rainbow Dash.”

“T-that doesn’t mean anything! I’m the real me!”

“If we smack this lyin' thing around, will it stop pretendin' to be our friend?” Applejack asked darkly.

Rainbow felt something snap inside her chest, like too much pressure on her sternum during a high-speed dive. “I'm not lying! It’s me! Remember that talk we had, on the train north when Sombra stole the kids?”

“The Princess said you have all of Rainbow's memories, to make you a better spy.” Rarity countered, unmoved.

The Princess nodded sadly. “It is easy for a changeling to rob the minds of their victims.”

“But that—that's no fair! I am me!” Rainbow cried out. She looked to her friends imploringly. “You have to believe me! You're making a mistake!”

“You have been acting oddly all week,” Twilight pointed out, levitating a scroll in front of her. “Your behavior has been erratic, you’ve been suspicious one moment then helpful the next. You practically tried to interrogate me at the bachelorette party and earlier when you stayed at my house, for one.” She frowned, clearly remembering. “You’ve expressed interest in what all of us have been doing for the wedding despite the fact that you’ve never indicated an interest in cooking, sewing or animal care before.” She narrowed her eyes. “In fact, you’ve hardly been training for your Sonic Rainboom at all.”

Rainbow felt her jaw drop. “What?! But--I--this isn't right! This is all wrong...” she flittered this way and that, her hooves tapping anxiously against the floor.

With her magic the Princess raised a pair of manacles. “Please put these on. I ask that you come along quietly and do not resist.”

The sight of her teacher, mentor and practically second mother holding up cold iron restraints panicked Rainbow Dash in a way she never thought possible. “Wait, no! Please! There's gotta be some way I can prove that I'm me!” She looked this way or that for some shred of support, any indication that the Princess or her friends would give her even the benefit of the doubt. An icy chill ran down her spine when she found none. “I-I know! I can do a Sonic Rainboom! That'll prove it! No bug can do that--” she started lifted off the ground, checking to see if she had enough space to pull it off--which of course she didn’t, but her desperation made her overlook trifling details like that.

“Please do not try to run, it will only make things harder.” Celestia tilted her head up.

“Just let me do this!” Rainbow looked this way and that, “A Rainboom'll prove that I'm the real Rainbow Daaa---ack!”

Rainbow yelped as a lasso slipped around her and grew taut. At the other end, Applejack gave a sudden yank that brought Rainbow crashing down to the ground. “No, you don’t!” the cowpony growled as she began tying Rainbow roughly, inspite of her struggling.

“Let me go! I’m Rainbow!”

“No, you're not!” Pinkie Pie yelled, startling Rainbow into silence. “The real Dashie's sitting in a cave somewhere, all scared and alone and trapped, and you're pretending to be her and coming to my parties and eating Dashie's cupcakes!”

Applejack nodded gruffly. “That’s right! You shut your lyin’ mouth!” She glared at Rainbow as she slapped the manacles on. “Ah want mah real friend back!”

“Please!” Rainbow begged, tears starting to well up as she was bound. “Don't do this!”

Fluttershy bit her lip. “Princess, are you sure that…”

“Yes,” the Princess answered sadly. “I am.”

Rarity also looked uncertain as she looked over to the thoroughly restrained Rainbow Dash. “Don't struggle, I'm sure the Princess will help you later. Even if you're not really our friend, you have her thoughts and memories.”

Rainbow shook her head but was prevented from further protest by Applejack sharply tugging on her manacles. “C’mon, you!”

The doors opened once more, revealing a pair of guards. Rainbow Dash shot her friends and mentor one last pleading look, only to feel her heart shatter when they either glared at her or looked away. She wasn’t sure which one was worse. It was like some powerful being had just scooped out her soul, leaving her hollow and empty. When the guards escorted her out, she didn’t resist.

Interlude 1

Fluttershy was so upset at seeing Rainbow Dash—or who they had thought was Rainbow—being taken away that it was all she could do not to break down crying. Instead, she ran to the Royal Gardens, and then she started crying.

She threw herself down on the grass and sobbed, not wanting to be around anypony. Fluttershy whimpered pitifully, comforted only by a handful of animals who tended to her. Angel stroked the back of her head in a rare gesture of kindness from the often selfish bunny.

But even that wasn’t enough to calm Fluttershy down. Rainbow Dash was the first pony who ever wanted to be friends with a ‘fraidy-filly like me. If something could take her place, then who else could they be? She let out a frightened squeak. As much as she loved her other Ponyville friends now, it really wasn’t until Rainbow Dash arrived that she ever had enough courage or confidence to go out and actually make friends. If it weren’t for Rainbow Dash, she would never have had any friends. She was the glue that held them together. And if she’s gone now … d-does that mean we won’t be friends anymore? The thought made Fluttershy curl up, feeling more lost and alone than ever. Oh poor Rainbow Dash, she must be feeling the same way. She could be hurt or sad or scared!

The soft stroke of a paw between her ears distracted her. “Oh Angel,” she sniffed. “What can I do? Rainbow Dash is the one who always knows what to do—even when she’s wrong. And I’m just … me.” Angel tipped his head and frowned at her, his tiny paw cuffing her ear. “Ow.”

A soft rustling of leaves got her attention. Her eyes widened. Changelings! With a startled squeak, Fluttershy dove headfirst into a nearby bush. She covered her face with her hooves and hoped they’d just go past her. Hearing the soft sound of hoofsteps on the grass, Fluttershy’s heart thudded louder and louder as they drew closer, stopping right outside the bush. Oh no!

“Uh, Fluttershy?” She heard Derpy’s voice from behind her. “Why are you in a bush?”

With a nervous mumble, Fluttershy risked asking, “H-how did you know it was me?”

Derpy’s tone took on a mildly amused tone. “Well, aside from the question of who else would be in the gardens this late, your rump is sticking out of the bushes.”

“Not that we’re complaining!” Cloud Kicker’s voice suddenly chimed in.

Fluttershy let out an embarrassed squeak. “Oh.” She blushed and struggled to pull the rest of her in, with no success. “Um, can you help me out?”

“In a minute.” She could practically hear Cloud smiling and that made her blushing worse.

Now thoroughly embarrassed, Fluttershy tried to wriggle free, either to pull herself entirely into the bush or to extricate herself from it. All she accomplished was shaking her hindquarters around.

“Cloud?” Derpy said with a sigh. “Don’t say a word.”

“I’m not!” Cloud protested, sounding indignant. She then spoiled that by adding, “I can enjoy something in silence.”

With a mortified squeak and some help from Derpy, Fluttershy popped out of the bush and landed on her back. “Thank you.” She murmured. Derpy, laying underneath her, mumbled something in response. Cloud shot them an unabashedly envious look.

Climbing off of Derpy, Fluttershy shuffled her hooves. “Um, what are you doing out?”

“Getting some air.” Derpy said as she got up, groaning slightly. “Didn’t quite work out the way I wanted though…”

Cloud Kicker chuckled. “Yeah. We were just taking a break from the chaos of that many kids in one place.”

“Oh.” Fluttershy smiled, the thought of the foals improving her mood. “I imagine they're all just excited for tomorrow.”

“Dinky and Sweetie Belle have been all over the place,” Cloud nodded. “Only minor damage, though.”

Derpy ran a hoof through her mane. “It's a trick sometimes, getting them to stay focused. We usually need something bright or shiny to get their attention. Or Rainbow Dash.” She paused. “Though come to think of it, that’s probably because Rainbow Dash is a big kid herself.”

Fluttershy felt her throat suddenly constrict with emotion. Rainbow…

Feeling concerned, Derpy stretched a wing across her friend’s back. “Fluttershy? Are you okay?”

She struggled with what to tell them. They were her friends—and Rainbow Dash’s—too! Fluttershy had a history with them, going all the way back to flight camp. She felt like her insides were squirming around as she tried thinking of what to do. I want to talk to somepony—but won’t they just get worried and upset when they hear that Rainbow Dash is missing? Ooh, but I don’t want to lie to them either! What do I do?

Fluttershy opened her mouth—only to sudden squeak out, “ExcusemeIhavetogonicetalkingtoyouseeyoulaterbye!” and run away. She raced back into the castle, wanting to escape; not from Cloud and Derpy, but from this entire mess of a situation. Everything was going wrong, nothing was making any sense and Fluttershy just wanted to go home and be safe.

As she ran towards the wing of the castle where she and her friends were staying, Fluttershy thought of all the times when she’d been in danger before: from bullies at flight camp to monsters like Nightmare Moon and King Sombra. It had always been stronger, braver ponies like Rainbow Dash who protected her. But now she wasn’t around to save Fluttershy. That didn’t mean that she couldn’t help her, however.

I just have to ask myself, what would a brave pony like Rainbow Dash do? Fluttershy wondered. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, imagining that she was Rainbow. Brave. Confident. Almost without thought she felt her wings stretching out as if trying to catch the wind; she felt her back straightening and her hooves digging into the floor. Rainbow Dash wouldn’t run into her room and hide under her bed with her teddy bear. She’d march out and find some answers. Fluttershy opened her eyes. And that’s just what I’m going to do. This time, Rainbow Dash needs me and I’m NOT going going to let her down! She marched forward confidently. I’m going to see that changeling and find where Rainbow Dash is.

She gulped, pausing. Even if it is scary… Her ears perked as she heard voices coming from Pinkie Pie’s room. Of course, that doesn’t mean I have to do it alone either.

Pinkie Pie sat brooding behind her party cannon, wheeling it into her room once she had finished decorating for the reception. I’m gonna be at the Grand Galloping Gala—and it won’t be all I ever dreamed of. Her hair deflated and covered her face. It was just as well. She didn’t like it when other ponies saw her crying. Even if nopony else was around. Or maybe she just didn’t like crying. That made more sense to her.

Oh, silly-willy Pinkie! Nothing makes sense! Rainbow Dash is gone. Missing! Replaced with a cheap imitation from planet Nudnik. She dragged a hoof across her muzzle. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this … wedding parties are supposed to be fun. There isn’t anything fun about any of this!”

A balloon bobbed nearby, as if nodding in agreement with her. “I know, right? Ooh, if I wasn’t being such a dumb-lunk headed Pinkie getting all mad about some stuffy ponies I would’ve seen that Rainbow wasn’t Rainbow!”

Pinkie frowned. She didn’t like the feeling of frowning, it almost hurt. But something was bothering her--things weren’t adding up. I’m adding two and two and two but I’m not getting anything! Something’s wrong with how wrong this all is. She stood up. Well, this looks a job fooor—me! She pulled out a bubble pipe and deerstalker hat (for when she really wanted to sneak up and throw a deer a real surprise party!) before blinking. “Ooh, wait, wrong costume!” She tossed the hat and pipe aside and put on a gray overcoat and matching fedora, tugging the brim of the hat down over her eyes.

Now I’m ready to get to the bottom of this mystery!

Canterlot. City covered in rainbows and sunshine, to hide its seedy lies and secrets behind a family friendly exterior. Most ponies went along, ready and willing to be deceived so they never have see the darkness that permeates the entire rotten edifice. It was a city of big ponies, all of them with big jobs, big titles and big secrets. And it was my job to find them all out. Rainbow Dash was in prison. Was it because she was really a changeling? Or did somepony just want her out of the way. And if so, why?

Things were definitely suspicious. The evidence against Rainbow Dash was strong. Too strong. Or was it weak? I forgot. Anyway, the first rule of being a sleuth is knowing that it’s never the pony you suspect. Of course, I never suspected it would be Rainbow in the first place. Wait, I never suspected anything before the Princess got us together anyway. So does that make Rainbow the most likely suspect or the least? Maybe it’s just part of her that’s guilty? Her flank always rubbed me the wrong way.

Wait. That sounds wrong.

I shook my head. Okay, try again! If its the one you least suspect who’s really guilty, then who do I least suspect? The shock hit me like the sugarrush of a dozen cupcakes. “Gummy, how could you?!” Nopony would suspect him because she left him back in Ponyville with the Cakes--the perfect cover!

Wait, there are plenty of potential suspects who aren’t in town. Hmph. Maybe I’ll just start with the suspects who are around. Where to start though?

First there was the suspect herself: Rainbow Danger Professionalism Dash. She lived life on the wild side, knew how to party hard, played by her own rules, and let the world think what they would. A mane that matched all the colors of the rainbow, but it didn't taste like one (I checked). She looked like the kind of gal who could take you out for a hard and fast flight, and leave you tired and begging for more. She's trouble. The kind of trouble you want.

But since I just went through how it’s never the obvious suspect (except for when it is), I decided to look at the rest of our little ‘gang.’ Next there was—

“Pinkie Pie?” A soft voice rang out.

That’s when she stepped in. A yellow coat, like golden butter melting in your mouth. Legs that wouldn't quit, attached to a knockout of a body that had curves in all the right places, and some of the wrong ones too. I knew I was probably staring, but it'd be a crime not to look. She was a quiet one, but those are the most fun once you get to know them. The butterflies on her cute little flank didn’t do enough to emphasize how much of a beauty she was.

“Um, Pinkie, please don’t narrate me walking into your room.” Fluttershy asked, before blinking. “And…were you talking about my flank?”

I zoomed over to Fluttershy, getting right in her face. “Where were you on the night in question?”

“What question?” Fluttershy squeaked in surprise.

“I don’t know the question, I just know the answer is 42.” I narrowed my eyes at her, always playing the innocent. “Alright.” I pulled out a lamp and shone it in Fluttershy’s eyes, making her blink and hold her hooves up to her face. “Come on, you! Out with it!” I snapped. “We need you to spill the beans, lay it on the line, tattle your tale, come clean with extra soap, missy! In other words: confess!”

Fluttershy let out a startled squeak and dropped to the floor. “Okay! I once paid for a dozen carrots but when I got home I saw that there were actually thirteen of them! I was going to return it but then Angel ate them all! I tried to go back and pay for the extra carrot the next day, but I’d bought it from a travelling salespony and I couldn’t find him again! I’M A MONSTERRR!” She dissolved into wracking sobs.

I paused for a minute then sighed and shook my head. The truth didn’t always drop into your lap like a ripe apple bucked from the tree. Ah, Applejack. She was a tough cookie who didn’t crumble when things got hot. She was full of muscle from end to end (though some claimed she was missing the muscle between her ears). She had a knack for finding out the truth and was a trusty partner even when she’d lose her cool. She had a short fuse and an explosive temper to match, but you’d be hard-pressed to ask for a better pony by your side, in or out of a fight. Too bad I was working solo this time. Nothing for it but to keep going. “Playing dumb, huh? Well if you don’t cooperate with me, I’ll have to go get my partner!”

“T-the Good Cop, right?” Fluttershy asked, sniffling slightly. “B-because I think I’d prefer to talk to her…”

I frowned at her. “I am the Good Cop!”

“...Oh.” Fluttershy seemed to crumple up on herself. I massaged my forehead. Times like this I wish I had magic like Twilight or Rarity.

Ah, Twilight Sparkle. The mare with a coat and smell of lavender. An adorkable bookworm with more magical muscle and books smarts than street smarts to be safe. A unicorn obsessed with making the world fit with her sense of order to the point of self destruction, and would probably drive a whole town into mad frenzy if it meant turning in her homework on time. You didn’t mess with a mare who could lift a giant star bear-thingy like it was a child’s teddy bear unless you were asking for hurting. Shame I didn’t have the sense to know to leave well enough alone.

Then there was Rarity. A dame with an eye for cloth, and a wit as sharp as her own needlework. She lived the high life, but she wasn't afraid to get (a little) dirty. She liked her secrets, and kept them to herself—usually just with smiles and excuses, but also with a punch as hard as the diamonds she dug out the ground. I was just lucky she didn't put me in the ready-made hole.

In hindsight, maybe questioning her while she was in the bath was a mistake on my part.

But I was a regular mare friday, a gumhoof. What I got was what I got. It hadn’t let me down before and I didn’t aim to start now. I began to lay into her, grilling her like a cheese sandwich. I asked her when she first started noticing ‘Rainbow Dash’ acting wrong, when she first thought something was up, what her favorite flavor was. The longer our session went, the less things made sense. She was confused about Rainbow’s behavior, couldn’t say for sure if the mare we’d seen jailed really was Rainbow or not, or even offer any clue of when the genuine article had disappeared and been replaced. This dame was either lying or didn't have anything I could work with, and--

"Uh, Pinkie?” Fluttershy spoke up gently. “I'm a mare, not a dame."

Confusion. Even I was confused. I was sure I'd said that in my head. Anyway, this mare was a lousy liar: had tells a blind pony could spot. She couldn’t tell a fib about who cut the cheese, much less be part of a conspiracy to take over the world.

“Pinkie—”

“What is it, perp?” I affected a gravelly voice as I sucked on a lollipop, the white stick jutting out of the corner of my mouth. “If you’re asking for your lawyer, you’re talking to the wrong beat-detective.”

“Um, actually, I was wondering if we could….” she mumbled something.

I leaned forward. “Say that again.”

Fluttershy trembled. “I thought maybe we could go see…” Her voice trailed off into a frightened squeak. The annoyed tap of my hooves prompted Fluttershy to try one more time. “I-I want to see Rainbow Dash!” She blurted out. “Or the changeling who thinks she’s Rainbow Dash … it’s very confusing.”

She might have been shaking like a leaf, but she wasn’t wrong. There was only one pony—bug—who could have the answers I was looking for.

“I thought you were looking for the question—”

“He works in another city.” I brushed Fluttershy’s feeble remark out of my mind. “The only thing I know for certain is that nothing is for certain.” I tugged my hat down even lower. “Come on Fluttershy, we have to talk to the pony formerly known as Rainbow Dash.”

Interlude 2

The clock gently chimed midnight in the castle kitchen. The staff had all turned in for the night. Even the eponymous Chef Ramsay was nowhere to be seen. The only ponies left was Applejack and Big Macintosh.

That was how she wanted it to be right now: just her and the work. She mashed a pair of apples with more force than was strictly necessary, spreading apple innards across the counter. With a frustrated groan, she let her head flop forward onto the table.

Big Macintosh looked up from taking some pies out of the oven. Applejack groaned and waved him away. “S’nothing Big Mac. Neveryou mind me. Ah just...”

Ah just cain’t believe this … how in the hay did I not see that mah best friend had been replaced by some sort of giant bug monster? Applejack smacked her hoof on the table angrily. And why in the name of all things pony am I just sittin’ here baking snacks?

When Big Macintosh cleared his throat, Applejack realized that she had just let herself trail off. She sighed. “Look, Ah can’t really go int’ it much but … there’s just some trouble with Rainbow Dash.” Mac tilted his head. “It ain’t anything y’all can really do to help with. She just … it turns out she … she’s just been--lying to me for a while ‘bout something big. REAL big.”

Big Macintosh thoughtfully chewed the wheat sprig in his mouth, shifting it to the side. He opened his mouth, but Applejack waved him off. “And don’t give me none of that ‘ponies ‘re entitled to their secrets’ stuff o’ yers.’ It ain’t about that.”

When she hesitated, Macintosh started tapping his hoof impatiently, urging her to go on. Applejack sighed. “All right, all right stop being so darn pushy. It’s that--she made me wonder ‘bout things you know? If she could be, er, well, if she could lie t’me right to mah face it makes me wonder what else other ponies could be keeping from me. Makes me question darn near everything.” She adjusted her hat to hide her unease. “It’d be like finding out that our apples are really oranges on the inside.”

A disbelieving snort from Big Mac prompted her to frown. “No, Ah ain’t making a mountain outta a molehill! Dang it, this is important t’me! You wanna know why?” She stomped her hoof, turning to Big Mac as he was about to reply. She was grateful she had stopped him in time. If Ah let him start up now, there'll be no stoppin' his jaw from flappin’. Applejack cleared her throat. “All right then: it’s cuz Rainbow’s a pony o’ action, like me. When things get tough we’d rather go out and do something than wait around for a perfect solution t’fall outta the sky.” She snorted gently. “Shewt, Ah know what I’m like: I’m stubborn, set in mah ways and more bull-headed than the durn bulls. I’m not a pony of high-falutin’ ideas like Twilight or Rarity. The thing Ah trust the most are my family, my friends and my own four hooves.” She regarded her hooves, covered in bits of flower and apple mush. “And right now, all they’re doing is making treats when my friend…”

Big Mac tilted his head, a questioning look on his face. Applejack turned away. “S’nothing.” She walked over to the sink to wash off some of the apple goop, feeling her muscles twitching with energy. Her heart raced and adrenaline raced through her as she thought about Rainbow being missing, being held captive somewhere. Applejack longed to be out there—or, failing that—acquainting the faker sitting in the dungeon with her hooves.

All the explanations and rationales the Princess had raised—the security concerns, the assurances that she had her best ponies working on it—did nothing to counter Applejack’s feelings that she should be out there, searching for Rainbow herself.

‘Her best ponies’ … pfeh. Who in the hoof are they? She thought to herself. We’re the ones who stopped Nightmare Moon and Sombra. WE’RE her best ponies. How does the Princess expect t’have them find Rainbow if’n they didn’t even notice she was missin’ until the Princess told them?

This ain’t right! She angrily tossed the towel into the sink once she was done. I have to go out and do something to look for Rainbow. I should be turning over every rock in the place, squeezing that bug in the dungeon till its head popped because… Applejack sighed miserably and buried her face in her hooves. Because if it were me missing, Rainbow wouldn’t be waitin’ for somepony else to find me. She’d be tearing apart Canterlot trying to find me. S’kinda pony that she is.

Big Macintosh walked over and gently put one of his giant hooves on his little sister’s back. It was to his surprise when Applejack turned around and held him tight. Seeing this situation was troubling her even more than he thought, Macintosh enveloped her in a comforting hug.

The idea of Rainbow Dash being held somewhere, lost and hurt or worse, set Applejack shaking with rage. She hadn’t wanted to believe it when Princess Celestia called her and the others aside to tell her the news about Rainbow … but after Princess Celestia explained how a changeling could perfectly copy a pony’s appearance and memories—and after everypony else had brought up all the funny little things Rainbow had been doing lately—it made too much sense.

But what if we were all wrong? Applejack couldn’t help but wonder. Then we just threw our friend into the--NO! She shook her head. There’s no way that would ever happen. That thing down there isn’t our friend. She just...she ain’t!

The Rainbow Dash Ah know would never back down or want to compromise with a bunch of Canterlot snobs, Applejack angrily thought back to their talk about AJ’s problem with Ramsay and how Rainbow had suggested that she listen to him. Should’ve known something was wrong back then. She sagged. When Big Mac tilted her head up, she looked miserably at him. “Ah was too wrapped up in mah own problems to notice that somethin’ was wrong. What kinda friend does that make me?”

Big Mac furrowed his brow thoughtfully. Applejack prodded his chest with her hoof. “And don’t you give me none of that ‘Ah’m being too hard on mahself,’ nonsense. Nothing’s supposed t’matter as much as kin and friends.” She felt her lip tremble. “But Ah let myself get distracted by mah pride and the glamour of a fancy wedding. Granny’d be ashamed of me…so would Ma and Pa.” Her voice hitched and Big Macintosh’s held her even closer. “I feel like a dang foal. I HATE feeling like a foal. And I hate that mah friend is out there and I cain’t do anything to help her.”

If she weren’t being held by her brother she would’ve lashed out and bucked the nearest wall. The idea that she had cared more about out-baking some foul-mouthed chef than noticing when something was wrong with her friend—she felt as if her insides had twisted up.

Her eyes hardened as she thought about the imposter in the dungeon. But I know who I can take it out on! She grabbed her hat and pulled it down over her eyes. I’m gettin’ some answers. And I ain’t leaving that dungeon ‘til I get some.

She pulled away from her brother. “Thanks for the chat, Big Mac. It really helped. I gotta go!” She ran out of the kitchen calling back, “could y’all take care of the pots ‘n pans? Thanks!”

Big Macintosh stared sadly at the dirty dishes and pots piled up high in the sink and sighed resignedly. “...Eeyup.”

An uncomfortable and distinctly un-ladylike sheen of sweat beaded her brow, but Rarity didn’t dare pause to remove it. She was in the zone, as it were, and didn’t want to risk anything breaking her concentration. Because once she lost her focus on her work she’d starting thinking about Rainbow Dash and—

Oh dear, Rarity sighed to herself, her work rhythm disrupted.

Now now, there’s no need to worry. Princess Celestia knows what she’s doing. Why, she probably has the strongest, most handsome and dashing ponies in all of Equestria searching high and low, low and high for Rainbow Dash.

She shook her head, throwing herself back into her work. The news about poor Rainbow had sent her into such a work tizzy that she’d all but finished the outfits for the wedding. All that were left were her friends’ dresses. Rarity looked down to see that she was working with a spool of rainbow fabric, for Rainbow Dash’s dress. It practically broke her heart.

Rarity prided herself on her attention to detail … so why didn’t I see that something was dreadfully wrong with one of my dearest friends? Oh, they had their differences, to be sure. Significant differences. Their … very, very VERY big, significant differences. But beyond all that, they were friends. They understood what it was like to give you all in service of your dreams and work—whether it was redesigning a dress and restitching a hem for the ninth time or practicing the same maneuver until it was just right.

Rarity had always thought that, as close as she was with Rainbow and her other friends, that they’d have a chance to become even closer. Perhaps show Rainbow Dash the wonders of a full-fledged spa day, or help show Rainbow the inner beauty that she hid beneath her brash and rather coarse exterior.

She was so engrossed in her thoughts that it wasn’t until she heard a steady click-clack sound that made her realize she had run out of fabric and her machine was just stabbing the dress. With a sigh, she set her sewing instruments aside and took off her work glasses.

A sudden knock on the door sent her heart up into her throat. She barely repressed a shriek of shock. “Co-ome…” her voice quivered and broke. Rarity cleared her throat and tried again. “Come in!” The door swung open and in stepped an elegantly dressed and groomed white unicorn whose monocle and neat blue mustache were instantly recognizable across Canterlot “...F-Fancy Pants?”

“Ah, Miss Rarity!” The genteel stallion dipped his head as Rarity hastily tried to compose herself. “Delighted to make your acquaintance. My Fleur simply adores the dress you made for her. She can hardly wait to wear it to the Gala Wedding tomorrow.”

“I am delighted to hear it.” Fleur de Lis, unlike some of the others Rarity had made dresses for, had exquisite taste and had not tried to bombard Rarity to death over minor details. “She was a wonderful client to work for.”

Fancy Pants nodded, picking up on what was left unsaid of Rarity’s other recent clients. “I can imagine.” He straightened his monocle. “I must say my dear, you’ve made quite an impression on Canterlot society in the short time you’ve been here.”

Rarity felt her heart beat a little faster “Oh? I-I trust that it’s been a favorable one?”

“Of course!” Fancy Pants smiled broadly, a smile that made her want to join in. “It’s not just Fleur you’ve impressed. I heard Sapphire Shores simply gushing to Trender Hoof about how much she adores the outfits you made for her. Hoity Toity is collaborating with Photo Finish on a photo line-up for a new fashion show of his, and expressed interest in commissioning several outfits for the show from you.” He nodded to Rarity. “While you may have already been here for a week, I can say with a certain degree of assurance that you have now, indeed, arrived.”

It took every ounce of lady-like poise and grace and sheer force of will to prevent herself from squealing like a little filly and bouncing around the room. After all her hard work, all her time and effort spent, she was on the cusp of realizing her dreams. She could have needed wings to soar higher than this.

That stray thought brought back her worries with a crashing feeling of sadness. What good is there in making an impression, improving one’s standing or career if you cannot even share the good fortune with your friends? Even the prospect of finding her potential prince charming at the Royal Wedding Gala no longer seemed important. After realizing that she had yet to respond to Fancy Pants, she forced herself to smile. “I-I am most delighted to hear it.”

Fancy Pants quirked an eyebrow skeptically, detecting her heart wasn’t in it. “Come now, I would have expected you’d be more excited. Is something the matter?”

“Oh no, no!” Rarity shook her head. “You’ve been most gracious and I am most thankful … I’m afraid I’m just a touch--distracted. I suppose it’s because the wedding is tomorrow.” She looked at the closed door where she had hid her piece de resistance, Cadance’s wedding dress. She was so eager to make everything perfect that she hadn’t wanted anypony to see it. Now … she scarcely cared if anypony did.

Fancy Pants nodded. “I see. My apologies. I understand completely.” He spied the rainbow fabric Rarity had been working with when he arrived. “Ah, I assume that would be for Miss Rainbow Dash?”

“...Yes.” Rarity flinched. “Do forgive me, I’m simply going through a bit of a--personal moment.”

“I see.” The surprising thing was, Rarity felt that he probably did understand. He went on to prove it by asking, “I take it something’s amiss between you and Miss Dash?”

Blasted perceptive stallion, Rarity wanted to curse. “Something of that sort.”

Fancy Pants nodded. “I suspected as much. I had the opportunity to meet Rainbow Dash shortly before she left for Ponyville. She was a, hmm, spirited young mare.”

Rarity felt like somepony was squeezing her heart. “She certainly is that.” She murmured.

“I thought as much.” He removed his monocle to clean it with his hoofkerchief. “Might I offer you a few nuggets of wisdom from an old fogey?”

“Oh but you aren’t--” Rarity started before Fancy Pants waved her objections away.

“It’s all right. Now, I’ve been a fixture of the Canterlot scene for a number of years. I’ve met all manner of ponies, and other beings too, come to mention it. But I don’t believe I ever met a pony quite like your friend.” He smiled wryly. “In Canterlot society ponies place a great deal of emphasis on appearances. We even live for appearances, defining ourselves by our position, status, title.” He looked at Rarity. “When I met your friend she was a breath of fresh air. Suffice it to say, she ruffled a lot of feathers.”

Rarity was unable to prevent herself from smiling. “I can imagine.”

He nodded. “Quite. There was such a sincerity about her that one seldom sees in high society circles. It made for quite the impression. She made me realize just how many of my fellow Canterloters hid behind masks of title and status.”

“Rainbow Dash has masks of her own,” Rarity observed, thinking of how Rainbow hid her fears and insecurities behind her ego. But she felt compelled to add, “I suppose the difference is that most ponies try to appear strong to conceal their lack of it. Rainbow’s … her mask hides an even deeper inner strength, whether she knows it or not.” She smiled, a touch sadly.

I had wanted to tell her that one of these days. She never needed to show off for everypony to realize how brave and amazing she was: anypony who met her realized it almost immediately for themselves. I wanted… Rarity swallowed a lump in her throat. I wanted her to see herself as the amazing pony that everypony else already saw her as. Ego and split ends aside.

And now I may never get my chance. Rarity slumped her shoulders in an unladlylike gesture, but she was too miserable to care.

Fancy Pants smiled. “My thoughts exactly. Sadly, many of my fellow society ponies don’t like being confronted with somepony who forces us to take a closer look at what we really are, beneath the masks of title and societal positions. Most choose to shun the messenger. But when I think of ponies like Rainbow Dash--and you--it makes me want to say … to tartarus with appearances.”

Rarity was taken aback by his almost unnatural bluntness. “I, er, don’t know quite what to say. Why are you telling me all this?”

“Do forgive my plain speaking,” Fancy Pants shook his head. “I’m afraid the dam of many years patience finally gave out and you happened to be the only pony I could talk to freely about it. As you can easily imagine, there are a lot of important ponies--and ponies who want to be important--attending tomorrow’s festivities. It makes for an … uncomfortable closeness among too many ponies of title, position and status.” He sighed softly. “I suppose what I’m saying is, as you move up the social ladder, hold onto what makes you unique. And be certain to hold onto friends like Rainbow Dash. They are truly something precious.”

“...I know.” Rarity murmured softly.

“It never hurts to be reminded.” Fancy Pants smiled. “Now, if you’ll excuse me I’m afraid I must go before Fleur starts to worry. We have a big day tomorrow, and you as well. Have a pleasant evening Miss Rarity.”

Rarity bid him a good evening, only half paying attention as he left. She was too busy thinking about Rainbow Dash. She found it hard to doubt Princess Celestia. She was simply so wise, so elegant … so regal that she couldn’t imagine her being wrong. But she also found it hard to believe that Rainbow Dash wasn’t, well, Rainbow Dash.

If only there was a way to be certain! She paced back and forth. It wasn’t until she felt her lip throb did Rarity realize that she had started chewing her lip. A nasty, unfortunate habit usually brought out by stress. This certainly would qualify…

She thought hard. For some reason Fancy Pants urging her to hold onto her virtue stuck out in her mind. If certainty is not an option then a lady must go with her virtue and her intuitions, and mine are to be generous.

Well, how does that help? a snide thought from the back of her mind wondered.

She hmmphed. I chose to be generous with my successes and my gifts … and right now the benefit of the doubt is as much a gift as any other I can give. Rarity strode out of her workroom, leaving behind the loftiness of high society for the lowest location in all of Canterlot.

Interlude 3

Nothing made sense anymore. That was the main thought running through Twilight Sparkle’s mind as she galloped homewards. The awful scene of Rainbow Dash—or the changeling masquerading as Rainbow, Twilight forced herself to remember—being dragged away in chains threatened to overwhelm her. Even though she had noted various actions by ‘Rainbow’ that seemed suspicious, she still struggled to reconcile with the idea that her friend had been replaced by a duplicate. Her mind had been thrown into a tizzy with questions.

But answers eluded her as she wracked her brain to assess the few facts she did have. Rainbow Dash has been certainly acting strange lately, she thought to herself. And it started right after we arrived—when she showed up with all those bruises. After that, she was hesitant and awkward around me and the others. Plus, she ruefully noted, Rainbow had been unusually diligent in checking up on how everypony’s tasks for the wedding were going. Normally Dash would’ve just let Twilight handle that aspect while she’d spend her time practicing her Sonic Rainboom, trying to get it just right for Cadance and Shining Armor.

Couple that with the fact that she’s barely spoken to either one of them, despite how close they all are, and that she hasn’t shown any signs typically associated with seeing one’s crush marry somepony does suggest that she had been replaced not long after we arrived in Canterlot.

Something nagged at her mind, not letting her just accept the conclusion she’d laid out. What am I overlooking? She wondered. The facts fit the case the Princess presented to us that Rainbow Dash has been replaced by a changeling infiltrator, one so accurate that it can perfectly duplicate her memory, mannerisms and appearance.

But if these changelings can imitate a pony so flawlessly that even they believe themselves to be ponies, then why would there have been any strange behaviors at all? Wouldn’t they be acting so perfectly that there wouldn’t have been any tipoff? Twilight chewed her lip. So the fact that Rainbow wasn’t acting exactly like herself could be evidence that she actually is herself, except that—

“GRAAAH!” Twilight suddenly yelled, startling several passerbys. “I need more evidence!”

Well, she thought to herself. Princess Celestia is one of the only ponies who knows anything about changelings and she’s sure that Rainbow was one.

She had briefly considered the possibility that the Princess had been replaced, but rejected it. The idea that a changeling could physically defeat Princess Celestia was hard enough to imagine on the face off it. The other evidence was even harder to ignore … and she was staring at it beginning to set.

A changeling might be able to imitate a pony’s special talent in order to blend in better. But there’s no being capable of raising and setting the sun like Princess Celestia, except maybe for Princess Luna. So I have to assume that Princess Celestia is herself and is correct about Rainbow.

But then why do I feel like that’s not the end of it? Twilight groaned. As much as she wanted to just put her trust in the Princess, her own observations gave her enough reason to pause. Who do I believe now? Rainbow Dash or the Princess? This was doubly difficult for Twilight. She had always put her trust in strong, confident ponies like the Princess or Rainbow Dash. But now one of them was wrong and there weren’t enough facts to prove conclusively which one it was.

There just weren’t enough facts. A gnawing sensation in her stomach filled her with unease. How could she figure out what to do if she didn’t have enough information? The urge to make sure her family was safe was interfering with her ability to think. That was when she decided to head home.

Twilight ran home as fast as she could, ignoring the odd looks she got after a few near collisions. Flinging open the front door with her magic, she burst in, panting. “Shining Armor? Mom? Dad?”

For an awful moment she worried that she was too late. Then she heard Cadance’s voice. “In here!”

Twilight let out the breath she didn’t realize she had been holding. “Cadance!” Twilight trotted in to see her parents, Shining Armor and Cadance sitting around the dinner table. “You’re here? But your wedding is tomorrow!”

The Princess of the Crystal Empire chuckled and shook her head. “Yes, yes I know … but honestly? It’s such a silly tradition, the bride and groom not seeing each other before the wedding. Besides,” she smiled slyly. “I never could say no to dinner with your parents. They’re the best chefs I know.”

“Flatterer,” Twilight’s mother, Twilight Velvet, smiled warmly. “I wish you had told me that you were coming Twilight, I’d have set an extra spot for you.”

“You look like you hurried over.” Night Light said, looking at Twilight. “Everything all right?”

Twilight wanted to tell them. She wanted so badly to get somepony else’s view—especially since she didn’t trust her own. But the Princess had given her an order.

“It is vital that we do not give Queen Chrysalis any indication that we are aware of her plot—or that we have uncovered her agent,” Princess Celestia had told them. “I need you all to carry on as if everything was normal, until the wedding.”

“But what about Rainbow Dash?” Applejack had protested. “We cain’t just forget about her!”

Rarity nodded briskly. “We have to start looking for her!”

The Princess raised her hoof in a calming gesture. “I know that you’re worried for her. I’m worried for my student too. I’ll dispatch my most trustworthy and capable guards to spearhead the search. But that is not your task.” She looked around. “I know this is very difficult for you all, but I must ask you to keep what has transpired here to yourselves, at least until we can determine who else we can or cannot trust.”

“I advise you all to take some time for yourselves, in order to better come to grips with what’s happened.”

“It’s—it’s nothing. Just some pre-wedding jitters! Aheh heh.” Twilight gave them all her biggest, widest smile.

Shining Armor raised an eyebrow. “Um, Twily? You’re not the one getting married.”

“I know that! You can still have pre-wedding jitters even if it isn’t your wedding! There’s no law against it!” Her eyes darted this way and that, her smile still plastered on.

Cadance stood and made her way over. “Twilight, I’m sure you’re worrying over nothing.” She gave her a comforting nuzzle. “We know that you’ve worked your hardest to make sure everything comes off tomorrow. Our wedding couldn’t be in better hooves.”

“Absolutely.” Shining nodded.

Twilight sighed, leaning into Cadance’s embrace for comfort. “Can I…talk to you and Shining Armor for a minute? Alone?”

Her parents exchanged a quick glance. “We’ll just take care of some last minute table settings,” her mother quickly offered. “Won’t be but a minute! Come along dear…”

As soon as they were gone, Twilight turned to Cadance and Shining Armor. “Thank you … I, I don’t even know where to start.”

“Relax, it’s all right.” Cadance held her close. “Feeling anxious?”

“I’m just sorry I haven’t managed to spend more time with you and Shining Armor,” Twilight leaned against her.

Cadance chuckled. “It’s all right. Planning a royal wedding is a pretty big job, and we’re both very grateful to you and your friends for all your help.” She draped a leg across Twilight’s shoulders and hugged her close. “Besides, we’re going to be sisters-in-law! We’ll have all the time in the world together once everything is settled.”

Twilight managed a small smile. “I—I always did want a sister to talk to.” She bit her lip. “And now’s probably a good time to start.” She took a deep breath. “I have something to tell you. Both of you.” Twilight swallowed nervously. “I’m—I’m not even supposed to say anything. The Princess—”

“Twily…” Shining Armor put a hoof on her shoulder. “If Princess Celestia told you not to say anything, then you should respect her wishes.”

“This is too important!” Twilight urged. “Something—something bad is going to happen at your wedding! There are these creatures, changelings, that plan to do—something, but we don’t know what!”

Cadance held up a hoof. “Whoa, Twilight whoa! Calm down. What’s this all about?”

Without any further prompting, Twilight began to explain everything that had happened: the strange goings on, the explanation from Princess Celestia … everything except that one of her friends was the prime suspect and that Rainbow Dash had been replaced, and her imposter in the dungeon. Possibly. She didn’t want to burden them with the knowledge and she didn’t know if she could present the few facts she had dispassionately.

Shining Armor looked gobsmacked. “This is…Twily are you sure? The Princess told you all this? This isn’t like that time you read that philosophy book and ran and panicking because you weren't sure what was real anymore.”

“No, Shining this is real!” Twilight looked from him to Cadance and back again. “This is big and I don’t know what to do!”

Cadance also looked troubled. “I can't believe Celestia didn't tell me anything about this!”

“I'm sure she has her reasons, Cadance.” Shining Armor offered, trying to calm her down. “Twilight said she was worried tipping the changelings off. The only ponies who know are the ones who need to know.”

“I think we need to know if our wedding is going to be attacked!” Cadance huffed, her face darkening.

Shining put a calming hoof on her shoulder. “I'm not happy about being left out of the loop either, but what can we do?”

His tone was clearly rhetorical, but Cadance’s answer was anything but. “I'll tell you what I'm going to do,” she whirled around and marched towards the door. “Go right up to the palace and give her a piece of my mind!”

The two siblings shared matching expressions of horror. “But ... but she's the princess!” Shining sputtered.

“So am I, and this is my wedding!” Cadance emphasized as she looked back, her cheeks flushed with indignation.

“But--that'll mean she knew I told!” Twilight’s hooves anxiously darted up and down on the floor. She might have decided to violate the Princess’ orders not to tell anypony else, but that didn’t mean she wanted to wave it around in her face.

Seeing Cadance hesitate, Shining pressed on. “And it's already dark out. She might already be asleep.”

Cadance sighed and took a deep breath. “All right … If Luna was here I’d go talk to her. But I’m definitely going to have a word with Aunt Celestia tomorrow.” She gave Twilight a comforting smile. “I won’t tell her how I found out, so don’t worry.”

Twilight couldn’t help but wonder how that talk would go. Would Princess Celestia make Cadance understand the reasons why she’d been keeping everything so low key? Would Cadance be able to convince her to try something different? She winced at the thought of Celestia telling Cadance about the false Rainbow Dash and not hearing it from her. But she just … she couldn’t tell them. She couldn’t explain it to herself, so how could she hope to explain it to her brother and future sister-in-law?

She couldn’t. That made her think of something a wise pony had once said, ‘If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough.’ That thought weighed heavily on her mind as she bid them and her parents goodnight.

Night had fallen by the time Twilight stepped out of the house. She stared up at the castle, deep in thought. I need to figure this out before the wedding, but I also need more information. She shut her eyes and concentrated. With a sudden flash she vanished from the spot and reappeared inside the castle. The corridors were dark and she kept to the shadows.

It occurred to her that what she was doing--sneaking around the castle, planning to break into the dungeon to see a prisoner--could land her in some serious trouble. Twilight gulped nervously as she realized just how much trouble she could land in. This was all highly illegal.

She bit her lip and did her best to blend into the wall. This wasn’t like her. I’m not a rule breaker! I’m not some rebel without a cause who likes to sneak around. What am I even doing? This is something Rainbow Dash would do--not me! Except Rainbow Dash wasn’t here. And the only one who knew where she was was down in the dungeon. ...This is something Rainbow Dash would do for me. Since she’s not here--I guess I’ll have to bend the rules a bit this time.

As she made a sharp turn Twilight found herself bumping against something solid. Falling back on her rear with a yelp, she heard a grunt. Fearing that she had just bumped into a guard Twilight let out a panicked squeak. “I was just looking for the library! Please don’t throw me in jail!”

“Twilight?”

She blinked at the familiar voice. “Applejack?” Looking around she saw the rest of her friends gathered around. “Girls? What’re you doing here?”

“Same thing as you, Ah’d guess.” Applejack nodded to her. “Lookin’ fer some answers.”

Pinkie Pie tilted the brim of her fedora upwards. “The time’s come to pull back the curtain of lies and see the stark naked truth revealed as--”

“Pinkie could you kindly stop narrating?” Rarity huffed. “I didn’t particularly care for having you attempting to interrogate me in the shower in the first place, much less keep reminding me of it.” She looked to Twilight. “We all had some time to think about what happened earlier and, well, we’re not sure,” she confessed. “If the Princess is right, if that was or wasn’t our Rainbow Dash and--”

“I understand,” Twilight sagged in relief, glad to know she wasn’t the only one who harbored doubts. “That’s why I’m here too. I want to talk to her. It.” Her ear flicked in annoyance.

Fluttershy hesitantly spoke up. “But, how do we get down there without the guards seeing us?”

“Three words,” Pinkie spoke up, suddenly holding a large cardboard box over her head. “In. cog. nito.”

Twilight facehooved. “That’s only one word. Anyway, I have a different idea.” Her horn began to glow. A tingling sensation, akin to having one’s hoof fall asleep, crept up her body as she slowly vanished from sight. “How do I look?”

Rarity cleared her throat. “You, um … don’t.”

“Perfect.” Twilight quickly looked herself over, making sure she didn’t miss any part of herself. Would be hard to sneak past the guards if her rump was still visible. Also extremely embarrassing. “I’ll cast the spell on the rest of you and then we’ll have to quietly make our way by the guards.”

After a quick round of nods, Twilight turned the rest of her friends invisible as well. With a muffled shush as her only instruction, she led her friends past the guards standing at the top of the stairwell leading down into the dungeon. The answers were down there. The only question was, just what those answers would be and whether or not she liked what she would discover...

Chapter 12

This wasn’t Rainbow Dash’s first time in the dungeons of Canterlot Castle. She had thoroughly explored them during her fillyhood days. It was a favorite hiding spot of hers, despite the lack of skeletons or anything cool like that. It wasn’t like your stereotypical dungeon: it was well-kept, clean and in relative good order despite its obvious disuse.

However, while the shackles she was wearing may not have been sharp or rusted over, that didn’t change the fact that she was jailed like a criminal. Worse, she was being accused of not being herself. How the feather am I supposed to prove that I’m me when someone—someTHING else can look like me, talk like me, act like me and have my memories?

She leaned back, her head resting against the cool, stone wall. Okay, so … I can do this. I am me. Since I’m me, there’s gotta be evidence to prove it, right? The truth always comes out in the end ... wow, just channeled Applejack there a bit. She shut her eyes. Focus, Rainbow Dash. What can you do to prove you’re you? Sonic Rainboom is out, they’ll never let me out to do it. Wonderbolts trivia? Dang, no, they’ll just say that I’m a changeling who took all of my memories. Lame. Her ear flicked a little.

Looks like I’m gonna have to get creative. She idly tapped her hoof against the floor. What makes me, me? Huh, sounds like one of those boring philosophic stuff Celestia used to make me read. Guess it’s worth a shot … how did those go? Uh, I think therefore I am? Rainbow’s face lit up. If I think I’m me, then I must be me! Yes! Thank you philoso--wait. That makes no sense. If I think I’m a dragon, that doesn’t make me a dragon. Grah! Stupid philosophy!

That was a waste of time, she brooded, idly kicking at the hay and straw lining the cell floor. “This is nuts!” she shouted, her voice echoing off the empty dungeon walls. “There’s nothing deep about any of this! I’m me and that’s all there is to it!” But a nagging thought wormed its way into her head: How can I be me if I can’t prove it? Doesn’t that mean--that I might not be me? She sat down, hard. This is as pretty basic as it gets. If you can’t prove you’re you … doesn’t that mean that you aren’t? If I can’t prove to my friends, my teacher or me that I’m Rainbow Dash, does that mean that they’re right? That I am a changeling?

The pit in her stomach grew even deeper. Just acknowledging the fear somehow made it all the more real. I should be able to prove that I’m me, no sweat, right? I mean, there’s only one Rainbow Dash and she--I mean I!--am a pretty darn unique pony.

Except that I can’t. She leaned against the wall and slid down it. I can’t prove it. Wrapping her wings around her, she hugged her limbs to herself and buried her face. What if I am the changeling?

She shivered. Her chest burned as it felt like no breath she took was getting enough air. The walls and bars of the cell seemed to loom down on her, making her prison seem even smaller. I can’t take it! I have to get out of here! She look around, frantic for some avenue of escape she might have somehow missed before. Rainbow wanted to get away: from the dungeon, from Canterlot … and most of all from the doubts now eating away at her.

The sound of heavy door swinging open made her ears perk up. Somepony’s coming, she figured. Quite a few actually, judging by the sound. Their hoof-falls echoed heavily through the dungeon.

Soft murmurs grew louder as they approached. “…are you sure about this?” She heard Rarity whisper. “Perhaps we should have waited and brought Princess Celestia down with us...”

“We can’t wait!” Applejack retorted. “Rainbow Dash needs us and we need answers, now.”

Twilight’s voice cut in. “The Princess is going to be busy trying to find and root out any other changeling infiltrators. Applejack is right, we can’t wait.”

Rainbow swallowed, feeling faintly ill. She didn’t know what was worse: being completely alone or having her friends come to accuse her of not being herself. She felt as though there was a pit in her stomach, one that by this point was so big it like she was falling into it from the inside out. Or outside in.

Rainbow sat down in the straw, a prickling feeling making its way up her back as she waited for her friends to come into view. Applejack and Twilight walked in at the head of the group. Once they were sure there was no danger, they nodded for the others to come in.

Dash looked around for any shred of sympathy. What she found was an array of confused, suspicious and hostile glances. None of them seemed to know what to make of her. After an awkward moment, Twilight cleared her throat and stepped forward. She tried to appear firm, but she came off as more unsure of herself. “We want answers.”

“Quite,” Rarity nodded. “You owe us that much, at least.”

Rainbow tried to speak, but a lump in her throat made her cough instead. “I—” she rubbed her neck. “…I’d like some too.” Her ears flattened against her skull.

Twilight didn’t seem to know how to respond to that, so she just pressed on. “We want to know where Rainbow Dash is.”

“I’m ... I am Rainbow Dash.” Rainbow felt disgusted with herself for the faint tremor in her voice, as if even she didn’t quite believe it to be true anymore.

Applejack picked up on, snorting derisively. “Sure don' sound like it.”

Pinkie moved past her friends to stand in front of the cells. “Don’t be like--you’re the real, Dashie, right?”

“I … I don’t know anymore.” Rainbow admitted, looking down.

Fluttershy, half-hiding behind Rarity, spoke up. “We're not trying to blame or judge you if you are a pony-eating monster, we just want our friend back.”

That was when Rainbow Dash started banging the back of her head against the wall. It’s just Fluttershy being Fluttershy.

Twilight stepped forward, trying to get things back on track. “Look, if you help us, maybe we can help you? I mean none of us know what your story is.”

“Know my story?” Rainbow made a noise that sounded like a mix of a growl and a strangled laugh. She got up and walked over to the door, slamming her hoof against the bars, making Twilight jump back in shock. “I don’t know my story anymore! I thought I did, but all of a sudden Celestia pops out and tells me, ‘Oh by the way, you're not Rainbow Dash, you're just a giant bug in a disguise!’ And because I can’t figure out how to prove that I’m me and not an exact imitation, I’m left in here to rot!”

Twilight leaned away from the cell. “Okay, okay, I understand. This is stressful for you … whoever you are.” She murmured under her breath. “There has to be some way to determine for sure that you’re a changeling. Maybe,” she quickly added, seeing Rainbow glower.

“Ah don’t think Princess Celestia would be wrong about somethin’ like this.” Applejack frowned. “She’s known Rainbow Dash longer than any of us, exceptin’ Fluttershy here.” She nodded to the canary yellow pegasus. “‘Sides, she knows more about magic and, shoot, darn near everything than than any pony. If she says this ain’t our Rainbow, then Ah believe her.” She shot the imprisoned pony a harsh glance. “Helps that this ‘un’s been acting battier than than a fruit bat during applebucking season. Should known mahself the way she---she...” Applejack’s breath hitched and she tried to stay calm, but it was clearly an effort.

Fluttershy moved close to her. “Applejack?”

“Ah shoulda known right off when ‘Rainbow’ here didn’t back me up ‘gainst those durn-foal fancy chefs in the kitchens,” Applejack went on, a quiver in her voice. “ The real Rainbow’d always have mah back and not be callin’ me a slacker or liar--I should’ve known somethin’ was off a while ago but Ah was too stubborn and mule-headed to notice that mah best friend…” She roughly rubbed a hoof across her face. “S’mah fault.”

“It’s not your fault,” Fluttershy offered her a comforting nuzzle. “I should’ve seen something was wrong with just how … how wrong she was acting when she was with me.” A sad, tired look made Fluttershy look haggard. This all was especially hard for her, being such a sensitive pony. “She was pretty unappreciative about how lucky she was and, well, just the way she had with the garden animals…”

Rarity let out a lady-like sigh. “I am far from blameless too, darlings. Why, I should’ve known something was wrong when she brutally rejected a simply delightful dress that I had agonized and slaved over to make perfect for her!” She held a hoof up to her face. While she was all for giving Rainbow (or ‘Rainbow?’) the benefit of the doubt, strange was still strange. Rainbow winced and now felt like a complete heel.

But Twilight gave Rarity an odd look. “Uh, but doesn’t Rainbow Dash normally not like--”

“Yes! Well,” Rarity coughed. “She was also unusually reticent about criticizing some designs I had been commissioned by various ponies to create that, I frankly admit, were not among my best.”

Pinkie nodded. “Yeah, that sounds a bit less like Rainbow Dash. Normally she’d just go on and on about how weird and frou-frou your dresses are!”

“Yes. Thank you, Pinkie.” Rarity bit off.

Pinkie frowned. “There was the way she was so nasty-wasty at the bachelorette party! She was trying to interrogate Twilight like some big ol’ … interrogating pony!” She frowned, casually ignoring the incredulous look Fluttershy was giving her.

Rainbow Dash felt her heart sink even further. Hearing her friends talk about just how she’d been acting … it made her start to wonder if maybe they weren’t right: that she wasn’t really herself.

Twilight stepped closer to the cell, critically examining its occupant. “I was probably the first pony to meet the imposter. Not long after we arrived I noticed ‘Rainbow’ sporting a bruise.” She frowned. “She told me it was a flying accident and I believed her … I should’ve pressed her on it, but…” She sagged.

“Come on now, Twi,” Applejack draped a foreleg across Twilight’s back. “She fooled everypony.”

However, Twilight continued to look miserable. “But … I’m the one who’s so detail-oriented, who tries to take notes and observe everything. When she slept over at my house, she flinched the first time I moved close to her. How could I not have seen it?” She clapped herself on the forehead. “Stupid, stupid, stupid!”

Rainbow Dash felt her heart sink even further. Hearing her friends talk about just how she’d been acting … it made her wonder if maybe they weren’t right: that she wasn’t really herself. “Please … don’t,” she asked Twilight. “I mean … if I didn’t know, then how could you? Don’t beat yourself up over it.”

All that did was remind Applejack of her presence. “You hush up!” She barked at Rainbow. “Stink bug…”

“If what the princess said is true, then she's—it, is not lying. It really believes that it is the real Rainbow Dash.” Rarity countered.

Applejack winced and the fight went right out of her voice. “That ain't ... well, that ain't okay, but Ah cain't be mad at it fer that.”

Fluttershy stepped to up to the cell door. “I'm sure you're a very nice ... whatever you are. My mother told me that I could be whoever I wanted to be, but I guess that works more for you? So, you can be whoever you want to be … just please don’t be Rainbow Dash anymore. She won’t like having somepo--someth--having you impersonate her. Um, it won’t end well.”

Pinkie was quick to agree. “Yeah! It'll get real confusing when we get the real Rainbow back. I mean when Cloud Kicker sees two Rainbow Dashes--or is that Rainbow Dashai--well, Cloud..." she giggled. "Ooh, makes me wish I had another me! Maybe I should go look for that magic pool I read about once...."

Twilight swished her tail in thought as she paced back and forth. “Perhaps there’s some way we can make certain. If we prove it to her that she’s not Rainbow Dash, that might break her programming. Then she might be able to tell us something about where Rainbow is. Hmm, let me see…” She thought for a moment, then her eyes lit up. “Ah!” Her horn shimmered, and a strand of Rainbow’s hair and a feather from her wing were suddenly plucked out.

“Ow! Give a pony some warning, would you?” Rainbow rubbed her head as Twilight examined the items. The hair and feather were surrounded glowed several different colors as Twilight analyzed them with different spells. Dash tapped her foot impatiently. “Yeah, and? What’d you find?”

“…The hair and feather seem to be genuine,” Twilight concluded, examining them critically as if searching for something she her spells might have mixed.

Rainbow was more excited. “Awesome! That means I’m really me, right? You can let me go?”

“Hold your horses there…” Applejack held up a hoof. “Twilight?”

Twilight bit her lip as she unhappily looked from Rainbow Dash to the rest of her friends and back. “The fact that my spell determined them to be real could mean that she really is Rainbow Dash … or that a changeling infiltrator doesn’t simply put on a glamour, but physically becomes the pony it’s replacing. That seems more likely, really. If it was as simple as pulling a feather and checking it, finding changelings would be easy. Maybe a blood test? No, that could run into the same issue.”

Everypony groaned. “That … doesn’t really seem to help.” Rarity observed, wincing. “Isn’t there any other way we can be certain?”

“Maybe a Sonic Rainboom?” Fluttershy suggested softly. “She did offer to do one earlier—“

“No can do,” Applejack shook her head determinedly. “That'd just give her a chance to zip away if she is a spy.”

Rarity nodded. “For once, Applejack is right.”

“Thank y—” The cowpony frowned. “Hey!”

Rainbow Dash groaned and flopped backwards onto the straw-covered floor. “This isn't fair … how am I supposed to prove I'm not an imposter who has all my memories and appearance? It's like a one of those things ... a Toss 42?”

“Catch 22.” Twilight corrected.

“57! 72! 64 Down! Hut, hut HIKE!” Pinkie shouted.

Applejack scratched her head. “One thing Ah don’t get. If this Queen Chrysalis wanted to replace Rainbow so we couldn’t use the Elements of Harmony ‘gainst her, why not just steal the durn things?”

Twilight shook her head. “Because Princess Celestia put a spell on them, remember?” She concentrated her magic, and soon the six necklaces appeared on the group. “She wanted to make sure nopony would ever steal them and she wanted us to be have them nearby if we needed them. If somepony ever tried stealing or removing the necklaces from us, she’d know.”

“Then, doesn’t that mean that she is Rainbow?” Fluttershy asked. “She has the necklace…”

“Maybe,” Twilight relented. “But maybe that’s why she wanted to have a replacement. If the changeling is so like the real Rainbow that we can’t tell the difference, the Element might not either.” She sighed. “This is so frustrating! All I have is circumstantial evidence that can be used either way.”

Fluttershy looked at Rainbow sadly. “This must be even worse for her … even she can’t be sure of who or what she is.”

Rarity nodded. “I admit, I would be hard-pressed to prove that I am me and not an exact duplicate with all my memories and personality and...” she trailed off as an uneasy thought settled over them.

Pinkie Pie blinked, poking herself. When nothing happened, she pinched her cheek and then gently smacked herself. The others did their best to ignore it, writing it off as Pinkie being Pinkie. But she raised her hoof and looked to Twilight. “Um.... we do have a way of telling that we’re all us, right?”

Fluttershy ducked down, nervously looking this way and that.

Twilight’s hesitancy spoke volumes. “Well … not exactly. I mean there is probably a spell somewhere that can reveal a changeling.”

“Then cast it!” Rarity and Rainbow Dash exclaimed together.

“I didn’t say that I knew it!” Twilight protested, her voice beginning to sound strained. “I don’t know every spell ever made! There is just no way to tell who is a changeling when you have changelings who don't even know they're changelings.”

Applejack started glancing suspiciously from side to side. “So what do we do now?”

“Um, panic?” Fluttershy offered, crouched down on the floor.

“That's your answer for everything!” Applejack snapped, her patience fraying. “If we cain’t be sure that none of us’re changelings…” she took a step back away from her friends.

Twilight bit her lip. “I'm not even sure I can trust myself. Maybe it’d be best if I just ... I don't know, left town entirely?” She paused. “But if I am a changeling...”

“Or I could be the changeling,” Fluttershy spoke up. “Um, sorry if I am. I don't want to horribly eat and kill all of you, but if I'm a changeling I might not have any choice so I'm really, really sorry.”

Applejack, distractedly stared at her hoof. “Ah forgive yew? I guess…” She leaned forward. “A ha! There’s the scar Ah got when I split my hoof first time I tried applebucking as a filly! I am me!”

Rarity gave her a suspicious glance. “Surely a changeling infiltrator would know to copy that detail … one you conveniently never chosen to mention before.”

A loud gasp from Pinkie interrupted them. “What if I was replaced last night when I became one with my inner self at the bachelorette party?”

“You mean when you were passed out?” Fluttershy queried.

“That too!”

Applejack backed away until she came in contact with the wall. “Y’all just keep back!”

“You keep back!” Rarity retorted, brandishing her horn. “I have a horn and I’m not afraid to use it!”

Pinkie scraped her hoof against the floor. “Yeah! Even if it is really short and stubby!”

“It is not!” Rarity shouted.

Fluttershy squeaked, quivering against the floor from all the shouting. “E-everypony stay away! I don’t want to eat any of you!”

Twilight paced back and forth. “How can I not be me?!” She gasped. “If my old school finds out about this, they might take away all my certificates! My degree! Or worse: send me all the way back to magic kindergarten!”

“Secrets and lies … it’s all secrets and lies with you ponies!” Pinkie shouted. “And maybe me!”

“Shut up!” Rainbow slammed her hooves against the bars. “Knock it off!” Once everypony was startled into silence and was listening to her, she went on. “Listen to yourselves! What’s the matter with all of you? With us?” She took a breath, urging them to listen to her. “Look … I spent all week watching you guys, trying to figure out which one of you was the changeling and I don’t think any of you are imposters. But I can’t prove it and I can’t prove that I’m me. Neither can any of you.” She looked at her friends one a time. They looked uncomfortable but none of them offered any argument. Rainbow went on, “But you know what? That’s not what matters right now.”

Applejack looked agog at her. “How can knowing the truth if we’re really us ‘r not isn’t important?!”

“Don’t you get it?” Rainbow Dash pressed. “You don’t know if all of us are bugs, I’m a bug, one of you is a bug or none of us are bugs. It. Doesn’t. Matter anymore!” She stamped her hoof. “Either I'm me and I can't prove it or I'm a bug who looks like me, thinks like me, acts like me and thinks she is me. Whatever. I'm done with this horseapples. I’ll say I’m the changeling if it gets you all to stop. The important thing is that there are changelings sneaking around all over the place and getting ready to attack the Wedding. And if you guys keep running around like a bunch of orthros’ with both their heads cuts off, then there’s no way we’re gonna stop them! So knock it off!” She panted, chest heaving as she waited to see how her friends would react.

“She’s right.” Everypony turned to look at Applejack. “Ah don’t know if she’s Rainbow or not, but she’s right. Them bugs are aiming to take us all down. We cain’t do anything about it if we’re all too busy lookin’ over our shoulders at each other to get the job done.”

Fluttershy lowered her head, letting her mane hide half her face. “And, um, if one of us is the changeling?” Rarity slowly reached out and placed a hoof on Fluttershy’s shoulder, eliciting a soft squeak of surprise. But she didn’t pull away.

Rarity nodded in Applejack’s direction. “If one of us is the fraud, then we shall deal with it and not rest until we have our real friend back. But until we know for sure there’s no sense in acting like uncouth cutthroats fighting over the last designer dress during a sale.”

“So, in other words, like you every time there’s a sale?” Pinkie joked, getting a chuckle out of everypony. Even, after a slight harumph, Rarity herself.

“Yes, yes, very amusing…” Rarity quirked her brow. “Now then, the question is, what do we do about her?” She pointed to the imprisoned Rainbow Dash.

Twilight frowned, thinking carefully. “...I think we should let her out.”

Applejack, despite her earlier agreement with the prisoner, looked a touch uncertain. “How’d you figure that?”

“Because you were right. And so was she.” Twilight nodded at Rainbow. “I’ve been thinking about how Rainbow Dash has been acting all week, and yes, there were plenty of odd things that made me doubt her--but there were also plenty of moments where she tried to build us up, where a fake would’ve tried to tear us down. Whenever the five of us started arguing and fighting, Rainbow Dash was the one who tried to bring us back together. Even if she is the changeling but simply doesn’t know it, then keeping her with us so we can keep an eye on her works better than just keeping her imprisoned down here.” She closed her eyes. “And … none of us can prove beyond a doubt that one of us--any of us--could be well-programmed imposter. But when there’s no evidence to prove or disprove an idea … I guess the only thing left to do is go on what feels right.” Twilight smiled at Rainbow. “Right now, I feel like my friend needs me. I’m not leaving without her.”

Applejack was still for a moment, then she nodded. “Yeah, Ah hear ya.” She turned back to the dungeon. “Ready t’be released for good behavior?”

Rainbow managed a smile. “Since when I have I ever not been ready?”

“‘bout when you’ve been on yer best behavior,” Applejack retorted. “Hang on back now…” She readied her hindlegs for a powerful buck. “This here’s a literal jailbreak!”

“But Applejack--” Fluttershy started, but Applejack didn’t hear her and lashed out at the doors...only to overbalance and fall on her face when her hooves came into contact with nothing. Craning her head back, she saw the cell door had already swung open.

“What’sit? How--” she looked around, her face taking on a sheepish look when she spotted the cell immersed in the same magic aura as Twilight’s horn. “--oh. Right.”

Twilight shrugged and flushed, feeling a bit sheepish herself as she set about taking care of Rainbow’s restraints. Rainbow Dash stood up and shook off her manacles once Twilight was finished. “Oh yeah, that’s better.” She stepped out, walking over Applejack before the cowpony got back to her hooves. “Nice try AJ. Better luck next time.” She held out a hoof to help her up.

Applejack grunted and paused for a moment, eyes locked on Rainbow’s hoof. Then after a fateful pause, she reached out and grabbed it, allowing herself to be pulled up. “Yeah, well next time Ah’ll just let you cool your hooves in jail. The thanks I get...”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. We gotta move!” Rainbow shook her head. “We’ve got to take care of the changeling problem before the wedding and we don’t have a lot of time!” She spread her wings and zipped up the stairwell.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight called out after her. “You forgot about the--” There was a sudden swish and clang as two spears suddenly emerged crossed, blocking the way out. “--guards.” Twilight finished.

Dash backed up as two royal guards forced her back down the stairs at spear point, glaring at the assembled group. “What’s going on? Who let the prisoner out?”

“Oooh, we’re busted.” Pinkie groaned.

Rarity took a step forwards, only to nearly end up skewered by one of the spears. “My good sirs, it is urgent that we speak with the Princess immediately…”

“Nopony is leaving!” The guard growled.

Rainbow blinked as she recognized them. “Steel Wing? Iron Hoof?” She shot them her most confident grin. “Come on you guys, it’s me!” All that accomplished was getting them both to train their spears on her.

“Huh, guess they really do know you.” Applejack couldn’t help but comment.

“Don’t move!” Iron Hoof shouted, getting Rainbow’s dander up.

“Listen Tender Hoof, this is important! We’ve got to delay the Wedding Gala before it’s too late!”

The guard snorted derisively. “The Gala has already started.”

That announcement made the six mares all shout. “WHAT?!”

Twilight was the first to recover “B-but, it’s not scheduled for another four hours! I would’ve been told if things were changed!”

“That means we really have to get going.” Rainbow narrowed her eyes. “Look Hoofsie, we gotta get moving. Step aside or do I have to remind you how I came this close to kicking your rump earlier? Remember?”

“I, uh, that was just luck on your part!” There was something about his hesitation that made Rainbow suspicious.

An idea popped into her head. She shook her head pityingly at the guard. “I had you on the ropes and you know it. I almost took your head off with these.” She jabbed her hooves forward in a punching gesture.

Iron Hoof sneered. “You hit like a breezie.”

And that’s all I needed to hear! She grinned and promptly bucked him in the face.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight shouted at her. “How is this helping?!”

“HE’S A FAKE!” Rainbow yelled back as she grappled with him. “I never even touched Iron Hoof last time we met. So that means--” she slammed her hooves down into his gut. Hard. He doubled over, eyes wincing shut in pain. When he opened them again, they were solid green.

Applejack punched Steel Wing while his attention was divided, laying him out. “Got me convinced!” She shouted to Rainbow. “Twilight, could you take care of them?”

“Right!” Twilight grabbed the two fake-guards and used her magic to hurl them into the open cell, slamming the door shut once they were in. “Good catch, Rainbow. They must’ve been replaced recently--and quickly--if they didn’t have time to give them their memories.” Her eyes widened in realization. “If they weren’t worried about being discovered, that they must almost be ready to make their move.”

“Then we have to hurry!” Rainbow called as she flew up the stairs and out of the dungeon, her friends following quickly behind her. “We got a wedding to crash!”

The group wasted no time as they ran, full bore to the main hall where the Gala Wedding was to be held. There were a pair of guards outside it, but given what they’d encountered, Rainbow wasn’t taking any chances. She barreled straight into the first and slammed him against the wall while Rarity restrained the other with the carpet. With the potential opposition out of the way, Dash looked to her friends. “Everypony ready?”

They nodded. But Twilight was still fretting as she opened the doors with her magic. “It just doesn’t make sense! Why would they move up the Grand Galloping Gala--and the wedding!--without telling us? And why didn’t Shining Armor or Cadance try to find us?”

Pinkie Pie peered inside. “It looks like they did.” She pointed inside.

The main hall was filled to capacity with ponies representing the width and breadth of Equestria. Earth pony and unicorn guards stood at attention, interspersed with crystal pony guards. Pegasi roosted in alcoves in the ceiling, looking down from above.

Rainbow spotted Fancy Pants and several other prominent members of Canterlot’s high society: Hoity Toity, Photo Finish, Sapphire Shores, Prince Blueblood, Jet Set and Upper Crust. But they weren’t the only high-class attendees, not by a long shot. She saw nobles, mayors and officials from all over Equestria, from Trottingham to Manehattan: unicorns who traced their noble lineages back to the old bloodlines of Unicornia, earth ponies industrialists and farming magnates, top pegasi weather managers and military officials. There were also seaponies and merponies, watching from small but lavish tubs and pools; crystal pony delegates who came to see their Princess wed; wild, semi-nomadic mustangians; the lords of Maretonia … leaders and elites of every kind of pony imaginable were gathered.

She also spotted Cloud Kicker and Derpy standing near Cadance’s group of flower fillies and lone ring bearer colt. Everypony in the room had their eyes on Princess Cadance and Shining Armor as they stood before Princess Celestia--and when they heard the door open, they all trained their gaze on the six mares who entered the room.

Shocked murmurs and whispers ran through the crowd as they looked from the doorway, to the altar and back again. When Rainbow Dash and the others followed their gaze, they saw why. Standing by Princess Cadance in her wedding party were...themselves. Rainbow’s eyes went wide. “What?!”

“Oh mah stars...mebe we really are the fakes!” Applejack exclaimed as Fluttershy hid beneath her own mane.

Twilight shook her head, trembling. “N-no…” Rainbow looked over and recognized the expression on Twilight’s face. She couldn’t process seeing herselfup there alongside her big brother and former foal sitter; seeing her parents watch from the crowd. Shining Armor looked from the Twilight standing beside him, to the one at the door, and frowned. Then he took a protective step closer to the one near him.

A pained whimper escaped from Twilight, one Rainbow Dash never wanted to hear again. The sight of her loved ones rejecting her...Dash’d been there. Twilight’s breath came in panicked fits and bursts, shutting her eyes as tears began to leak out. “No…” Her horn started crackling with magic energy, growing brighter and brighter. “No. NO. NO!” Her eyes snapped open, revealing them to be pure white orbs, glowing with tremendous energy. Her horn was the same color.

She was having a magical melt-down, Rainbow realized. Just like her entrance exam. “Everypony down!” Rainbow called before heeding her own advice. Her friends quickly followed suit, and not a moment too soon. Twilight screamed as a wave of magical energy practically exploded from her horn, washing over everypony present.

Most ponies, especially those nearest, were knocked over. Every unicorn felt the sheer raw power from Twilight’s outburst, giving most of them a headache. The rest of the audience shielded their eyes from the blinding glare. Even with her eyes closed and with her wing covering her face, Rainbow could feel the brightness against her eyelids. It wasn’t until it began to fade that she risked opening them again.

Around her, her friends stirred too. “Really Twilight,” Pinkie groaned. “Aren’t there pills for that?”

“Yer stepping on Cloud Kicker’s lines,” Applejack muttered as she peeled her face from off the floor.

Rainbow shook her head and looked back to the now thoroughly disrupted Gala Wedding. Attendees slowly got back on their hooves as guards began circling around Rainbow and her friends, shutting the massive door behind them and cutting off any possible escape.

She spotted Fancy Pants reaching over to help a pony beside him up … only to be grabbed by a black, wizened leg full of holes. “My word!” He blinked in astonishment as a changeling rose up, its pony disguise almost completely gone, save for the side of its face that was facing away from the blast.

But that wasn’t the only one. Gasps and screams were heard all over as ponies looked around and saw green eyes and patches of black exoskeletons on the beings beside them, beings they had thought were ponies like them.

With a sudden feeling of panic, Rainbow looked over herself. She looked at her legs, her wings and side … nothing. Applejack tentatively patted her own hat as she looked back to make sure she still had her cutie mark on her flank, and not a hard carapace. “Oh mah stars, we really are us!”

“Yay!” Fluttershy cheered, fluttering off the ground once she had checked herself over. Rarity and Pinkie Pie hugged each other, squealing with delight. And Twilight, groaning at the magical exertion she’d just been under, looked over to her family. Shining Armor had his head down and his horn pointing at the ‘Twilight’ beside him, who now stood revealed as a changeling, as were the rest of the group in Cadance’s entourage.

“YES!” Rainbow cheered, flying over to the altar where Princess Celestia still stood. “Princess, it’s me! It’s really me! Now we can--” her voice died on her lips when the Princess looked up at her, her mane falling away and revealing that her left eye was a solid, green orb glowing with a sick inner light. “...no.”

“The princesses send their regards,” Croaked a new, terrible voice from the facade of Princess Celestia. Her appearance shimmered and vanished, replaced by a nightmare from the recess of some poor broken pony’s mind.

She was tall, towering over everypony present as if she were an alicorn like the Princesses--an idea reinforced by her thin wings made of translucent membrane and her long, jagged, broken-looking horn. Like somepony's nightmare of a fell alicorn. The inexplicable holes in her tail, wings and legs leant her a broken look that made her even somehow more frightening for looking like pathetic, misshapen things. They spoke of an unknown horror, lending her a great power for still being able to move and function with them.

Her chitin was black as the night, almost as if it absorbed all the light from the room. Her hair--if it could be called that--was blue and made of a similar membrane as her wings, also ridden with holes. Her eyes were luminous and green, glowing malevolence. When she smiled--and what a horrid sight it was--they could see her fangs.

She was Chrysalis, Queen of the Changelings.

She grinned, sneering. “I now pronounce you all … dinner!”

Chapter 13

The Queen of the Changelings stood revealed, her shadow cast upon the gathered ponies below. “Now!” she ordered. Before anypony could react, dozens of ponies—including every guard in the room—were awash with a sickly green glow and revealed as changelings. Moving swiftly, they sealed every door and window and drew the drapes shut. Nopony was getting in or out, nor would anypony outside be able to see what was going on inside the main hall.

Without the Princess and without any guards, most of the attendees allowed themselves to be split and herded against the walls. Only a handful, like the bride and groom, refused to be intimidated, standing defiantly between the changelings and the foals. Derpy and Cloud Kicker tried to force their way through the swarm of changelings to get to the foals, but there were simply too many and they were pinned against the wall. It took another half dozen simply to prevent Big Macintosh from getting involved.

Rainbow Dash and her friends stood exposed and encircled by a ring of changelings. Their attention though, was still fixed on the one they had believed to be their Princess. “You…” Rainbow struggled between feeling shock, fear and anger, eventually settling on the latter. “It was you all along?!”

“Guilty,” Chrysalis chuckled flippantly. “Oh, I had great amusement in sending you and your feeble friends to leap at shadows. I haven’t had this much fun in ages.”

Twilight’s mouth opened and shut a few times as she struggled to find her voice. “T-that’s impossible!” She shook her head. “Nopony but the Princess can raise the sun!”

The Changeling Queen rolled her eyes. “Really, have you all forgotten that unicorns controlled the raising of the sun and moon in the days before the Royal Sisters? Do you not remember the Sun Stone and its powers? Or have you ponies in your endless adoration for Celestia simply chosen to forget that she is not the sole power in this world?” She chuckled contemptuously. “No wonder it was so easy to manipulate you all … if your precious princess had commanded you all to kiss her hooves, you’d fight one another to the death for the privilege.”

Applejack snorted, pawing at the ground. “You shut your yap before Ah shut it for ya.”

“You’ll never get away with this!” Rainbow shouted. “Princess Luna is already on her way back!”

Chrysalis smiled, unconcerned. “Why would she come back from the patrol her dear sister sent on her? Nopony’s called her.”

“But—you—” Rainbow facehoofed as she recalled who had told her that Luna would be returning. “Oh, horseapples.”

The Queen found her response amusing. “Quite,” she chuckled. “And by the time she does return, I’ll be running Canterlot. It’ll be an easy matter for Celestia to call in her sister for a chat…” Her eyes briefly transformed into Celestia’s soft pink ones. “...a final chat.”

The assembled ponies let out low groan of despair at the thought, and what that implied Chrysalis had already done to Celestia. “She’s bluffing!” Applejack blurted out. “Ah don’t believe for a minute this overgrown cockroach could’ve taken down Princess Celestia in a fair fight!”

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes. “Perhaps,” she allowed. “But then, who said it was fair?” She shifted and altered shape becoming a familiar sky blue pegasus with a rainbow mane. Rainbow Dash felt her own face pale, swaying slightly as she fought the urge to retch. The faux-Rainbow cried out in Dash’s voice, clutching herself as if in pain. “Celestia! Help me!” She suddenly started laughing. “The soft-hearted fool never even saw it coming.”

“Where is Princess Celestia?” Rainbow demanded, preparing to rush the altar when her friends tackled her, holding her back. “Where is she?!”

Chrysalis responded with Rainbow’s own confident smirk and said nothing. Dash growled with inchoate rage as the changeling resumed her true form. “Oh, and as for your friends…” the Queen looked down on Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. “Spoilers: there never was any such thing as a changeling infiltrator so perfect that they wouldn’t even know they were a replacement.” She rolled her eyes. “Really, what would be the point in having an agent who would identify with my enemies and actively plot against me? More trouble than it’d be worth.”

“So what now?” Twilight took a half-step forward, trying to radiate confidence. “You’re going to replace everypony here and take over Equestria?”

“Of course!” Chrysalis chuckled. “All of the most powerful and influential ponies gathered in one place—you might as well have hung a sign that said ‘Free Buffet!’ while you were at it.”

Applejack glowered. “We’ll fight. We’ll whup you yet! Ponies ain’t about to lay down and be invaded!”

That just set Chrysalis off even more. “‘Invade?’” She chortled, clearly amused. “Who said anything about invading? Once I dispose with this lot, I’ll replace them with my own subjects.” She gestured rudely towards the cowed elites. “Outside of the improvement, nopony will even notice the difference.” She looked scornfully at the room of ponies. “You ponies are weak, living in herds in the vain attempt of becoming strong. But the problem with being in a herd is that you just follow along wherever someone stronger than you goes. But without a figure like Princess Celestia, you’re just chattel. But me, and my subjects?” She waved her hoof at the changelings. “We are a hive--a multitude joined in glorious common purpose and guided by a sublime will: mine.

“You’ll go on living your happy little lives while me and my changelings help ourselves to a small portion of your love.” She grinned, exposing her fangs. “Really, it’s such a small thing.”

“Monster!” Applejack shouted. “Y’all can’t feed on ponies like they were a midnight snack!”

Queen Chrysalis shook her head. “Oh, we can and will. Because that’s all you really are to us: bags of meat. If it weren’t for your delicious emotions, you’d be utterly worthless.”

Rainbow narrowed her eyes. “Not. Happening. We’re gonna beat your face so bad that all your disguises will end up looking bruised.”

“We all wear masks, Rainbow Dash. But which is the true mask? The one that hides your face or that one that is your face?” Chrysalis smiled cruelly. “I’ve seen your real face. I saw it when I sifted through Celestia’s memories: the small, weak pony who puts on a façade of confidence and bravery to hide how afraid she is. Afraid of failing all the expectations put on you; afraid of never fulfilling your dreams; afraid of failing Celestia. Afraid of failing your own hype.” She bared her fangs. “It was delicious.”

Rainbow Dash remained impassive while her friends looked at her with concern. After a moment, she took a breath and released it. “Nightmare Moon did it better.”

“What?”

“I said Nightmare Moon did it better.” Rainbow looked up unflinchingly at Chrysalis. “The whole ‘Oooh I’ve seen your mind, I know you’re weak and scared, and blah blah blah.’ She tried to break me then and it didn’t work. And frankly, you’re no Nightmare Moon.” She shook her head. “I’m getting pretty darn sick of every whackjob, wannabe tyrant and their mom trying to tell me who and what I am.”

She paced back and forth. “It’s always, ‘Oh Rainbow Dash is such an arrogant jerk who doesn’t care about anypony but herself,’ or, ‘Oh poor Rainbow Dash, she’s such a weak, scared, insecure pony who just pretends to be confident.’ And I’m done with that horseapples. They’re all wrong.” She stopped pacing, facing Chrysalis with a frown. “I know who and what I am: I’m Rainbow Dash. I’m the pony that goes and does things that others say are impossible. I’m always pushing the boundaries, trying to do better; to be better. Even if I don’t always succeed, I’m still out there working my tail off. If I’m not the coolest pony in the room, it’s only because I have my friends with me. So yeah, your little mind games? Skip it.”

In a display of blatant disregard for her, Rainbow faced away from Chrysalis and shook her head. “Really, the thing I’m most upset about is how I didn’t figure out you weren’t Celestia sooner. I should’ve known it was you. I mean, the first time I saw you as Celestia, I thought she’d been letting herself go.”

“What?!” Chrysalis hissed again.

Rainbow nodded. “Totally. I thought she’d been hosting and judging cake contests all by herself. I mean, her flank was so big I thought it was twenty percent frosting.” She shrugged. “But hey, I guess love just isn’t low in calories. You better watch yourself Queeny, unless you want to end up looking like one of those bloated larvae things and having a heart attack.” She paused. “Wait, never mind. Need a heart before you can have the attack.”

Chrysalis smashed her hoof into the floor with enough force to crack it. “ENOUGH! I will encase you in a pod and make you watch as I feed on your precious Princess Celestia until she’s nothing but a withered husk!”

“So the Princess is alive!” Rainbow called out, feeling rewarded by the look of hope that she saw in the eyes of everypony who heard them.

Chrysalis’ wings twitched angrily as murmurs and excited whispers broke out among the prisoners. “Be silent!” She turned back to Rainbow Dash. “You little…”

“You see?” Rainbow flashed her trademark grin. “You’re not the only one who knows how to play mind games, psyche out the competition. Thanks for playing.”

“Get them!” Chrysalis bellowed. Her changeling horde turned away from keeping the captive wedding guests in check and advanced on the six ponies, who stood back to back.

Twilight looked over and nodded at Rainbow Dash. “That was really clever, getting her to tell you that Princess Celestia’s still all right.” She paused, looking around at the circle of enemies closing in on them. “Even though you did manage to really tick her off.”

“I haven’t even started to ruin her day,” Rainbow winked at her. “But for now, we’ve got some changelings to squash.”

“Twily!” Shining Armor, still protecting the foals with Cadance, was half surrounded himself. He reared up, clearly torn over whether to stay and protect the kids with his bride or to rush to the aid of his little sister.

Twilight was clearly anxious for her brother, so much that she almost missed a changeling sneaking up behind her. That changeling had an abrupt encounter with Applejack’s hooves. “Head in the game, sugarcube!” Applejack’s own eyes kept darting over towards the foals, where Apple Bloom and her friends stood huddled between Cadance and Shining Armor. The others were also similarly distracted out of fear for their siblings and friends in the other group.

Queen Chrysalis soon noticed. “Oh? Are the great heroes of Equestria worried about their little friends?” She sneered, baring her fangs at the frightened kids. Sweetie Belle and Dinky Doo held each other, looking terrified. Apple Bloom and Pip backed away behind Shining Armor and Scootaloo and Alula—despite trying to appear brave—were still betrayed by the quivering of their wings. Derpy and Cloud Kicker redoubled their efforts to push through to them. But there were still a lot of changelings between them and their goal.

The sight of Chrysalis even looking in their siblings’ direction set Rarity and Applejack to new heights of fury as they punched, kicked and even bit at any changeling near them. Rarity’s ton was earnest and menacing. “If you touch one hair on my little Sweetie’s head and I swear by my pretty, gorgeously sculpted mane, I will end you!” Applejack grunted in agreement, the lasso in her mouth preventing her from turning the air around her blue.

“Yeah! Ooh you’d be really sorry if we had super-awesome ancient magical artifact capable of defeating evil!” Pinkie Pie chimed in. “Oh, wait, we do. Why don’t we use that?”

“Pinkie’s right!” Twilight’s horn flashed and the Element necklaces appeared around their necks. “Let’s end this right now!”

“Sounds good to me!” Rainbow rubbed a hoof on the lightning bolt shaped gem and concentrated. She felt a magical glow surround her and her friends: six bright lights, each a different color, becoming one as a rainbow band connected each element to all the others.

All their memories seemed to wash over her with incredible speed.

Dash was awash with the feeling of connection and closeness to her friends. Images of her first meeting each of her friends played out in her mind’s eye, and their adventures together. She saw herself falling out of an apple tree and onto Applejack--from both her and Applejack’s viewpoints, making her realize she wasn’t just seeing her own memories, but her friends’ as well.

Next was encountering Rarity and her forced visit to the spa, Pinkie Pie’s surprise entrance and party, seeing Fluttershy again in Ponyville after all those years and finally meeting Twilight Sparkle.

Nearly every experience, every encounter was revisited within the blink of an eye. The trek through the Everfree Forest to stop Nightmare Moon, dealing with Trixie’s visit to Ponyville, the Best Young Fliers’ competition in Cloudsdale, traveling north to save the foals from King Sombra, and so many more. She saw events not just from her own memories, but her friends’ as well, often at the same time. It was hard to tell where she ended and her friends began.

The link between them intensified every experience. It was the most powerful reminder that friendship was truly magic.

Then the memories became more recent. She began to see her friends--and herself--in Canterlot, preparing for the wedding. Rainbow not only to revisit every suspicious thought and glance she’d given her friends--but also the ones they had given her. And each other. Only magnified.

She saw herself being dragged away to the dungeon from the her friends’ point of view and felt the anger and suspicion and confusion that reigned. The light began to flicker.

And then it was gone.

Like a snap, the connection was broken and Rainbow’s light went out. The other lights soon flickered and faded as well. “What happened?!”

Pinkie peered down at her necklace. “Did somepony forget to recharge these things?”

Applejack insistently started tapping on her own Element. “Come on, come on already!”

“It’s a magical gem, Applejack!” Rarity snapped. “It’s not going to just start working like an old boiler if you hit it right!”

Twilight shook her head. “I—I don’t understand. Why didn’t it work?”

Chrysalis broke in with a loud guffaw. “Ah, you ponies … you and your precious harmony.” She shook her head. “It’s such a fragile, tender thing to place all your trust in; to develop your whole society around. Because if even one pony is out of balance…” She turned to Rainbow Dash, eyes glinting maliciously. “It all falls apart.”

“That’s a lie!” Rainbow slapped a hoof over her Element. “These ponies are my best friends! I’ll be loyal to them forever!”

“Bold words, but they weren’t loyal to you, now were they?” Chrysalis towered over them, shaking her head pityingly. “And after everything you’ve done for them…”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “That’s why you told Rainbow Dash one of us was the changeling … and then told us that she was! You wanted to disrupt our connection to each other so the Elements wouldn’t work.”

“Twi, Ah think we all fig’red that out.” Applejack retorted testily.

Rainbow Dash looked around. No Princesses, no Elements of Harmony … and changelings all around. This was definitely not good.

Chapter 14

The circle of changelings around the six mares drew tighter, like a noose. Rainbow Dash’s eyes darted this way and that. Changelings buzzed around, blocking off the windows and doors. Even if she could barrel through them, there’d be no way the rest of her friends could hope to follow.

Her eyes glanced down to the Element of Harmony around her neck. The ruby lightning bolt seemed less bold, less vibrant than before. It could have easily been her imagination, but…

“Rainbow Dash?” Twilight’s voice interrupted her. Dash looked over to see Twilight approaching, her shoulders slumped. “I—we—wanted to say…”

“Really not the time for this,” Rainbow interrupted. The looming horde of changelings was enough to make the issue with her and her friends pretty irrelevant at the moment. “We’ll talk later, Twi.”

“Assuming there even is a later.” Rarity bit her lip. “Without the Elements—”

“My poor little ponies.” Chrysalis shook her head. “This sort of thing would never happen in my hives. Of course, that’s perhaps too high a standard. After all, we are legion. We are—”

“—a pain in the flank.” Rainbow snorted. “That’s all. You’re old hat. Heck, at least Sombra fought me face to face. I guess that what made him a king … and you a nag.”

Chrysalis let out something between a screech and a roar. The changelings charged. “Princess Celestia never did teach you about diplomacy, did she?” Rarity sighed as she dug her hooves in.

Rainbow Dash shrugged and flexed her wings. “Could never even spell it.” With a manic grin she zoomed ahead, meeting the changelings’ charge with one of her own. Unprepared for such an act, the changelings in the forefront were scattered, but not without landing several blows on Rainbow. Blood dripped freely from a gash on her cheek where the serrated limb of a changeling struck her. Seeing their friend injured hardened the resolve of her friends, who leapt into the fray with increased vigor.

“Does anypony actually have a plan, exactly?” Twilight asked as she levitated one changeling and tossed him at an oncoming group.

“Isn’t that your job?” Rainbow asked as she traded blows with another one. “Can’t you just blast them all away?”

Twilight grimaced and teleported over to her, barely noticing the two changelings slamming into each other when she vanished. “When I, er, lost control—I flooded the room with ambient magical energy.” Seeing the blank look on Dash’s face, she elaborated. “It’s like filling a room with fog. Only instead of not being able to see clearly, it’s hard for unicorns inside to use their full magic.”

Rainbow groaned. “Great…” She soon found herself grappling with another changeling, narrowly holding it back as its fangs snapped mere inches from her muzzle. The menacing green eyes of her attacker suddenly widened, then rolled upwards as the changeling collapsed. Dash looked up to see Applejack holding a broken piece of what looked like a table leg. “Thanks.”

“Anytime.”

Rainbow looked over to Chrysalis, who had not joined the battle and merely stood, watching. “That the best you got?” She snorted contemptuously. Chrysalis merely smiled as if to say, ‘now that you mention it…’ and nodded to the changelings nearest her. Before Rainbow’s eyes the changeling shifted into…herself!

She whipped her head around as all over the room, the changelings were turning themselves into duplicates of herself and her friends. “Ya had to ask?” Applejack groaned.

“Shut up.”

“Ain’t this some sort of fantasy of yours?” The farmpony looked around. “You filling up a room with yourself?”

Rainbow Dash eyerolled. “Ha ha. Hey AJ, go find some of your copies. That way, you can go buck yourse—whoa!” Rainbow Dash ducked just as a particularly aggressive Fluttershy took a swing at her. She backpeddled, trying some distance between herself and the thing wearing Fluttershy’s face. It’s no big deal, it’s not actually Fluttershy that I’ll be punching in the face. She frowned. Gyah, even in my head that sounds SO wrong.

The Fluttershy changeling seemed to pick up on it, smiling as it amped up the Fluttershyness--the wide aquamarine eyes, the look of hope and wonder--and Rainbow Dash had no choice but to beat it to a pulp. Dash closed her eyes. So it looks like Fluttershy. Big deal. It’s not the pony I’ve known since flight camp, the pony who always fixed me up after a crash … the pony who accused me of being unappreciative and saw me get dragged away in chains to the dungeons.

Rainbow Dash wasn’t a psychiatrist and didn’t know the sort of terms they employed. But she sure understood the meaning behind ‘catharsis.’ I’ve been having the worst day ever. I was thrown in jail, had my friends doubt, had ME doubt me and I’m mad as Tartarus … but I know who I can take it all out on! Her right front hoof solidly connected with not-Fluttershy’s face. “All right, who else wants some?”

When Rarity ran away from a trio of Applejacks--no doubt one of her worst nightmares--Rainbow Dash bowled into them. She buffeted the first around the head and neck with her wings before moving in close buck it in the ribs. “How d’you like these apples?”

“Why you…” Rainbow was a bit surprised, she hadn’t expected them to actually answer back, much less in Applejack’s voice. Using her momentary surprise, the changeling wrapped its hooves around Rainbow’s neck. The flush of anger of being restrained by a friend--again--lent her her strength. Dash elbowed the changeling repeatedly in the stomach until it let her go, grasping at itself. The final changeling Rainbow slugged in the jaw, wincing slightly as the blow set her hoof ringing.

Even before the dazed changeling hit the floor, Rainbow Dash was looking around for more opponents to fight. With barely a glance, she reached out and grabbed a Rarity-changeling by the shoulder and spun it around. Then she planted her hoof in its chest.

“Beast!” The Rarity changeling spat, retaliating with a stinging blow that clipped Rainbow’s ear, and hurt.

“That’s it,” Rainbow growled. “No more miss nice pony, I’m going to squash you into bug juice!”

Sniffing haughtily just like Rarity, her opponent dropped into an elegant poise. “Bug juice yourself, fake! I warn you, I may be a lady, but I know tai-chi!”

Rainbow growled, then paused. “Wait a sec … Rarity?”

Rarity lowered her hooves. “Rainbow?”

Hastily, Dash lowered hers too. “Uh, sorry about that.”

“Er ... yes, me as well,” Rarity shuffled awkwardly. The ease the two of them had nearly come to blows was disquieting enough: after all the suspicion from earlier, the nagging feeling that it might not have been an accident couldn’t be completely snuffed out.

“Yeah,” Rainbow did her own awkward shuffle. “Heat of the moment, adrenaline rush--you know how it is."

“Yes, quite,” Rarity agreed quickly. “It is rather difficult to tell the difference, what with—”

“SKREEE!” A changeling pounced at the two of them as they were distracted.

"Gyah!" Rainbow Dash grappled with the changeling, holding it in place as it struggled.

That is, until Rarity intervened. “Hee-yah!” With startling speed she dispatched the foe with a roundhouse kick.

Rainbow couldn’t help but blink and smile in appreciation. “Heh, nice move, Rares!”

“Thank you, darling,” Rarity panted. “Perhaps we should focus on the battle, though?”

“Right,” Dash nodded as she leapt back into the fray. “And watch your back!”

The freewheeling chaos of the battle continued, with each pony utilizing their own unique fighting styles.

Some were more unique than others. “Can’t catch me!” Pinkie Pie hopped here and there, always one step ahead of the changelings who repeatedly dove after her. Rarity and Twilight stood back to back, using their magic to great effect. Twilight froze a patch of floor beneath them changelings, causing them to skitter and fall. Others she simply knocked away with direct magical blasts. Rarity settled for dragging over a nearby table and using it to swat the changelings away.

Even as the six friends fought, other changelings moved to attack Cadance and Shining Armor. They couldn’t easily avoid them, as they were determined to keep themselves between the foals and the invaders. “Bring it on you ugly bugs!” Shining Armor’s horn flashed again and again as he blasted changelings away. The overload from Twilight’s earlier outburst prevent him from using his trademark shield spell, but he could still fight.

And so could Cadance. “Ruin my wedding?” Cadance blasted a changeling against the far wall. “I don’t think so!” While she was dealing with the first changeling, another latched itself around her hindlegs.

Shining Armor saw red. “Get your hooves off my wife!” He roared as he slammed both his front hooves against the changeling, knocking it away. Two more leapt from up from behind and tackled him.

“Get your hooves off my husband!” Cadance returned the favor, using her magic to lift up the two changelings and smack them together.

Rainbow grabbed a distracted Twilight-changeling and spun her around to face her. As she readied her hoof, the Twilight yelped and held up her hooves. “Rainbow it’s the real me!” Thinking quickly she blurted out, “Remember the sleepover at my house? Clown makeup?”
That caused Rainbow to quickly lower her hooves. “Gyah, this is confusing!”

Twilight nodded ruefully, then paused as her horn lit up, preparing a spell. Rainbow Dash tensed, expecting the worst. “Rainbow, get down!” Twilight yelled. She obeyed just in time. Twilight’s spell smacked an approaching Twilight-changeling into a wall.

“Thanks…” Rainbow stood, shaking herself off. “Maybe it’d be easier if we just fought our own fakes?”

“I thought of that,” Twilight sighed. “But they just kept changing appearances.”

Rainbow looked out over the chaotic scene. Applejack was being piled on by a group of Applejacks. Rarity was grappling with a Fluttershy—Rainbow hoped not the real one—while Pinkie was bouncing around randomly, eluding every changeling that tried to tackle her. “What a mess.”

“We need some time to think!” Twilight turned to where her brother and (soon to-be) sister-in-law were fighting. “We have to get over to Cadance and Shining Armor.”

Rainbow looked at the changelings between them and the others. “Okay then, we’re just going to have to rush ‘em.”

Applejack rolled her shoulders, cracking her neck as she took up a position by Rainbow. “Gotcha.” She looked to Rarity. “Just pretend they’re standing between you and the last fancy dress on sale.” AJ smirked, prompting a glower from Rarity—which only made her smile even more.

“On three.” Rainbow looked around. “One…” she paused. “Twothree!” The group broke into gallop, with Rainbow and Applejack’s hooves and Twilight’s magic clearing a path for them to get to their destination. They dove into the ranks of changelings like a wedge, forcing the ones assaulting Shining and Cadance to either turn to meet this new threat--only to be attacked from behind. It wasn’t long before the two groups had united, but not without sustaining injuries. Fluttershy winced as she clutched her wing to her side, her feathers askew. Applejack’s left eye was surrounded by a darkening bruise and was winced shut.

“Twilight!” Shining Armor hugged her as soon as they reunited. A pained, apologetic look crossed his face as he thought of how he’d almost gone through his wedding with an imposter of his sister for a best mare. “I didn’t—”

However, Twilight recognized that they had more immediate priorities. “No time for that right now! Shining we need you to put up your shield spell around us, now!”

Shining paused briefly, then nodded. “Right. Just keep them off me for a minute. I need to focus.” He closed his eyes and concentrated as his horn began to glow. A few changelings attempted to rush them, but between six capable mares and one thoroughly pissed bride, they stood no chance of getting close to Shining Armor. Soon he opened his eyes and his surprisingly pink shield of magic energy had emerged; surrounding the group, as well as the foals they’d been protecting, in a bubble.

One brave or foolhardy changeling slammed against the side of the shield...only to have Pinkie Pie imitating the smushed expression on his face from inside the bubble.

Twilight cast her own spell once the shield was up, a burst of magic like her earlier outburst, but more controlled and on a much smaller scale. When none of them were revealed to be changelings, they all let out a sigh of relief.

Wish we had that back when this mess was starting out, Rainbow Dash rued to herself.

Outside, the fighting continued as several changelings, all still in their pony guises, hadn’t noticed the flight of the genuine articles. They continued struggling with one another, one Rainbow-changelings bucking another. With an annoyed facehoof and sharp shriek from a higher-up, all the changelings dropped their glamours and revert to their true forms, ending the fight.

“Rainbow Dash!” She barely had time to turn around before Dinky Doo hopped up and hugged her around the neck. “Are you a'kay?!”

"Yeah, I'm fine." Rainbow hugged her back, discreetly trying to hide her injuries. "How're you doing?"

“Kinda better now,” Dinky looked around at all the changelings, in various states of disguise. “But I'm still kinda scared. I know I'm not supposedta be, 'cause you're here an' you an' your friends make things, better, but I dunno where you're gonna get a flyswatter that big.”

Dash chuckled and gave the filly a squeeze. "Hey, it's okay. We'll take care of it. You just stick close to Princess Cadance and Shining Armor, okay?"

“A'kay.” Dinky gave her a fillyish peck before reluctantly letting go. “Be careful, alright Rainbow? I love you.”

Rainbow felt herself untense. "Love you too."

“We can’t hide behind my shield forever,” Shining grunted, sweat dripping down his face as he strained to maintain it, changelings continuing to pound against it.

Cadance looked at the group. “The Elements of Harmony? Is there any chance you get them to work?”

Rainbow Dash avoided eye-contact with all of them. She didn’t want to know if they were all looking at her or not.

It was Twilight who, mercifully, fielded the question. “It’s … complicated,” she admitted fidgeting slightly. “I think we can … with time.”

“Time isn’t something we have a lot of.” Shining Armor pointed out with a grunt as small cracks began to appear in the shield. “We need the Elements.”

“What are you—nevermind,” Applejack rolled her eyes. “Ah’m more than willin’ to knock these bugs around all day, but Ah don’t think we’re gonna git anywhere just doing that. There’s a lot more of them then there are us.”

Fluttershy looked around quailing as several changelings who looked like Pinkie demonstratively licked their teeth. “If only we knew where Princess Celestia was…”

Rainbow’s patience frayed. “Well I didn’t see her down in the dungeons with me, so I don’t really know where she is! Do you?” The reminder of her brief imprisonment caused her friends to collectively wince. Dash closed her eyes. Ugh, not helping … head in the game Rainbow!

Twilight thought about the actual question behind Rainbow’s harshness. “If the changeling Queen had replaced the Princess all this time, she probably wouldn’t have hid her too far away,” she mused. “Keeping her imprisoned must take a lot of energy and effort, so Chrysalis would have to be nearby to make sure she didn’t escape.”

“But what if the Princess is in another castle?” Pinkie Pie asked.

A momentary hesitation lent Twilight’s following words an extra weight. “If we can’t get to the Princess … then I don’t know what else we can do. This is our best chance.”

“Then we’ll just have to make it work.” Applejack nodded.

“That sounds all well and good,” Rarity sighed. “But we’re not about to get to her trapped in here. And with the Elements of Harmony being … indisposed, that limits our options.”

Rainbow Dash turned around, getting everypony’s attention by stomping her hoof. “Hey. It’s not the glowing gems that make us awesome.” She looked, one by one, at each of her friends. “We do that all on our own.”

“Ah reckon she’s right.” Applejack nodded. “It ain’t the Elements that make us friends … s’other way around.”

“And Elements or not, we’re always gonna be friends. No matter what … stuff comes up.” Rainbow nodded to her friends. “I think we can take these guys. Together—we can do anything.”

“And together, we can be justice!” Pinkie exclaimed. Everypony gave her a look. “It sounded cooler in my head…” She offered weakly.

“Okay so, we have a plan,” Rainbow decided. “Bust out of here and get the Princess.”

Applejack gave her a flat look. “And how are we s’posed to get past all them changelings and their queen?”

“And what about Sweetie Belle and her friends?” Rarity tossed in, looking worriedly at the huddled foals. “We can’t leave them here with her.” She glowered at Chrysalis. “And we can hardly bring them into danger with us either.”

Rainbow Dash rubbed her face. “...Fine, we have part of a plan.”

“Actually,” Twilight interrupted. “That’s more of an outline for what we want a plan to accomplish, rather than being a plan in and of itself…”

It was times like this that facehooving was invented. “Okay, so its a plan in the stage of development that needs to be 20% more refined, happy?” Rainbow asked, dialing the sarcasm up to twelve.

Cadance swiftly headed off any other distractions, seeing Shining strain as the shield began to buckle. “Girls, you go look for Princess Celestia. Shining Armor and I will keep the changelings off your backs and protect the foals.”

“You can’t do that all on your own!” Twilight objected loudly, over the thuds of the changelings as they slammed themselves against the shield.

Shining Armor winced. “If we don’t, they’ll swarm you literally the second you head for the door.”

Rainbow looked around. Thing was, they were both right. The group would need a distraction and support to get out of the room without being mobbed from behind by the entire changeling swarm. But there was no way just two ponies—even ones as magically gifted as Shining Armor and Cadance—would be able to do that for more than ten seconds flat. That was when she spotted Cloud Kicker and Derpy Doo, still struggling to get over to their little sister and daughter, respectively. “Shining, can you make a hole in the shield to let me out for a sec?”

“Making a hole isn’t the problem.” Shining said grimly, his voice strained as the cracks became larger and larger. “What’re you thinking?”

Rainbow was blunt. “We need an army. Gonna go talk to a pony who knows about army stuff. Just give me an opening.” Shining grunted and she took that for agreement. She turned to the shield edge, waiting for the opening.

“Rainbow…” She turned around as Applejack put a hoof on her shoulder. “Be careful, sugarcube.”

She got a wry smile in return. “If being careful would save us, sure. But it isn’t. Chillax, I’m not about to get swatted by a bug.” Dash turned around again just in time for an aperture to open at the top of the shield’s dome. She flew up and over the surrounding changelings. Flying swiftly, she made her way over to her other friends. "Cloud!"

Cloud looked up from the changeling she'd just finished subduing with a very painful-looking joint lock. "Yeah?"

"We need a distraction!" She started, pausing briefly to acquaint a nearby changeling with her hoof. "Me and the gang are gonna bust out of here and look for Celestia. Twilight thinks she's probably somewhere in the castle." Rainbow spoke quickly. "But I need you and Derpy to help Shining Armor and Cadance keep these bugs contained here while we look."

Cloud finished leaving a large changeling-shaped dent in one of the walls before answering Rainbow's request. "I'll do what I can, but there are a lot of bugs here, and we're kinda short on weapons. And soldiers. Plus we gotta protect the kids too.”

"I know, I know, but this is our best shot." Rainbow whipped her head around, trying to take stock of everything. "Cadance and Shining Armor are about to whip up a big flash. That'll distract them and give you the chance to me and the girls break through." She paused. "I need you, otherwise everything's gonna completely turn into horseapples."

Cloud nodded, slowly meeting Rainbow's eyes. "If you need me, I'll always be there for you." She paused, slowly licking her lips. "Don't get yourself killed trying to be a hero."

"No need killing myself to try," she smirked. "I'm already a big goddamn hero, and so are my friends. You included."

Cloud grinned. "Dash, you say the sweetest things." A changeling pounced at her back, but Cloud dodged to the side, grabbed it by the neck, and slammed its head hard into one of the nearby tables. "Dammit, bugs! Dash and I are having a moment!"

Rainbow snorted. “There’ll be time for moments later. Right now I want you to take these creeps down to a ballroom blitz.”

Cloud's eyes lit up in glee. "You got yourself a deal, hotflanks!" She whirled around and pounced onto a trio of changelings who were busy menacing a pair of the nobles.

"That's not what I---oh never mind. Just be ready!" With that Rainbow turned around and fought her way back to the rest of her friends in Shining Armor's shield.

Rainbow Dash flew above the collapsing barrier Shining Armor had made. “Rainbow Dash!” Shining called up. “Did you do what you wanted to?” When Rainbow nodded, he looked to Cadance and shared a brief glance. “All right, when we say ‘now,’ cover your eyes! You’ll get your distraction.”

Inside the ponies bade their little sisters goodbye. Applejack held Apple Bloom tight. “Here, Ah want y’all to hold this for me.” She took off her hat and plopped in on her little sister’s head. “That way, you’ll know Ah’ll be back for it, and so you know just how much I love you, ‘kay?” Apple Bloom sniffed and hugged her tight.

Rarity fussed and dabbed Sweetie Belle’s tears away with a hooferchief. “Now now, mustn’t fret … Mother would be so upset if she saw you ruin your adorable face with tears. It’ll be fine.”

Rainbow smiled down at Dinky. “It's gonna be okay kids, stay close to each other and away from the changelings."

“A'kay!” Dinky nodded. Then she paused. “”Um ... how're we gonna know who's a changeling?”

“It'll be fine Dinky,” Dash assured her. “The changelings are just trying to mess with me and my friends. Everypony else is fine."

“They can't do that!” Dinky gasped. “That's Miss Cloud Kicker's job!”

Rainbow let out a strangled snort. "Heh, yeah. That's why it won't work."

“YEAH! Go get 'em, Rainbow!” Dinky cheered.

“Get ready--” Shining Armor warned them. “NOW!” The ponies barely had enough warning to close their eyes and cover them with their hooves as Cadance and Shining Armor combined their strength to emit an enormous bright flash. Changelings shrieked at the sudden blinding light, as did a number of unfortunate pony bystanders.

Rainbow Dash opened her eyes as soon as she dared. “Okay, now’s our chance. Let’s go!” The six ponies barreled through the confused and blinded changelings, making it to the door and out to freedom.

As soon as they were out, Derpy and Cloud Kicker, who had positioned themselves close by, shut the door behind them.

“After them!” Queen Chrysalis bellowed.

The changelings rallied themselves and moved towards the door. But Cloud and Derpy stood in their way. “You’ll have to get past us first!” Cloud barked.

From her dias, Chrysalis heard her and laughed. “A simple enough task … you are greatly outnumbered.”

“But they aren’t alone,” She turned around to see Cadance and Shining Armor join Cloud and Derpy. Cadance’s declaration hung in the air like a challenge. A moment later Big Macintosh, who had been held at bay by several changelings before the flare, joined them.

Chrysalis’ mood was unchanged. “Ah, the concerned family and friends. How sweet. You think this changes anything?”

Cloud Kicker smirked. “We’ve got a mom whose daughter your bugs made the mistake to threaten,” she nodded to Derpy, her eyes both fixed firmly on Dinky. “A princess baby-sitter and sister-in-law,” Cadance whickered and pointed her horn right at Chrysalis, “and two big brothers who would do anything for their little sisters.”

“You can just call us the B.B.B.B.B.F.F.s,” Shining Armor rolled his shoulders, limbering up.

“Er…?” Big Macintosh looked at him in confusion.

Shining Armor’s smile was vaguely predatory when he explained. “Big Brothers Best Bug Bashers Friends Forever.”

Macintosh snorted, stomping his massive hooves as he looked out across the changelings. “Eeyup.”

Cloud tossed her mane. “And then there’s me. Not only did you threaten my little sister, not only did you attack and capture my family in the guards, but you played your sick little mind games with one of my best friends.” Her eyes narrowed as she spread her wings, pawing at the ground challengingly. “Rainbow Dash has always been there for me, for all of us. And now I’m going to step up and be there for her. You’ve gone and thoroughly pissed us off: now we’re going to show you what happens when you mess with ponies’ loved ones.”

“It doesn’t matter.” The changeling queen gestured widely. “Your Princesses are gone. Your guards have been replaced or neutralized and your Elements have failed. And the ponies here...” her lip curled in disdain as the guests and attendees shrank away even from her gaze. “...are useless.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure.” Angered at being interrupted, Chrysalis whipped her head around to spot the interloper, an elegantly dressed white unicorn with a monocle and slim mustache.

Fancy Pants regarded the her. “I know what you, what most ponies, think of the Canterlot elite. You think we’re just ceremonial ornaments, loudmouths and cowards. And we may well be that. But this is our city, and it needs us!”

There was a tense moment when it looked like Fancy Pants’ exhortations fell on deaf ears. But then a pony hesitantly took a step away from the wall and over to the group by the door. Then another joined moved to follow the first. A trickle at first, but then it became a flood.

Not everypony did. Many stayed away, trying to avoid the danger they knew they were not equipped to face. Perhaps even most. But enough joined the group by the door: pegasi, unicorns, earth ponies, crystal ponies, even seaponies gestured defiantly from their ornate tubs and pools. Among them included several of Canterlot’s most prominent citizens.

“We may not be the heroes who get stories told about them,” Cloud Kicker nodded to her allies. “But even the second-stringers can stand up to monsters like you.”

“And you really think you can stop me, when your friends could not?” Chrysalis drawled.

Cloud shrugged. “Probably not. But we can give them a chance to get a second shot at it.”

“Noble,” Chrysalis sounded bored. “While I’m sure you’re eager to prove yourselves, I have elsewhere to be.” She turned her head. “Guards! Deal with this!”

A deep, booming voice answered her. “Yes, your Majesty.” The ranks of the changelings parted to reveal an enormous changeling, sized and proportioned like Big Macintosh. It was either wearing blue armor, or segments of its chitin was a different color. It wore a helmet and its eyes radiated malice. Several others stepped out to flank the first, obviously their leader. There were ten of them in total.

“I must be going.” Chrysalis’ smile was coy and mirthless as she faced the ponies. “I’ll be sure to give your heroes your regards…” she spread her wings and flew towards one of the windows. She shifted into her Princess Celestia disguise just as the changelings opened it for her.

Cloud Kicker watched her go, idly wondering if she could hope to follow her out … but the changelings resealed the window as soon as the Queen had left. Besides, the Changeling Captain had other plans.

“Apologies, meat.” The large changeling guard rumbled, his voice like boulders rolling down a mountain as he spread his wings, blocking any potential avenue. “But you’re not going anywhere.”

Chapter 15

This was the strangest battle Cloud Kicker had ever heard of. While she’d heard more than a few old war stories from her family about bizarre battles, she was pretty sure this was going straight to the top of the list.

One the one side was a room full of changelings—shapeshifting creatures that looked like a cross between a pony and an insect. At their head was ten massive changelings decked out in blue armor-chitin.

Cloud Kicker’s forces were Ditzy “Derpy” Doo, Princess Cadance and Shining Armor, some musicians and the cream of Equestrian high society. I really hope the saying about Celestia not necessarily being on the side of larger battalions is true, she thought worriedly.

That’s not to say that the ponies weren’t giving it their all—it’s just that their all was, frankly, weird.

Sapphire Shore tapped her hoof against the floor, getting a small beat going, her hips beginning to sway. “Five-six-seven-eight-Bah BAM!” She hipchecked two changelings close to her, then brought down another changeling with a solidly placed punch. “How do y’all like my new Hip-Hop-Ki-Do?” She grinned impishly. “Bet y'all thought I was just a pretty face. A lady has to keep her more enthusiastic fans at bay, dahlins. Now who's ready for a show?”

Octavia and Vinyl Scratch looked at each other as things were beginning to heat up. Vinyl shrugged. “Hey, if we’re all gonna get replaced by evil shapeshifting insects, I figure we might as well go down playing. One last great gig, huh? You and me?”

“Very well.” Octavia sighed as she readied her cello. “A professional always does her duty.” To her ensemble, she dipped her head. “It has been a privilege playing with you tonight.”

“HIT IT!” Vinyl cried as she cranked the volume up to max, the sound so powerful it physically knocked several changelings away from the speakers.

“Time for the cello solo!” Octavia raised her bow like a sword. “En garde!” She lashed out, smacking a changeling with such force that its head snapped to the side.

Cloud cracked her neck, determined to lead her troops--such as they were--into the fray. She rushed forward, ramming her hoof into the changeling captain’s gut and wincing as her hoof throbbed.

The changeling captain didn’t even seem put out. His voice was dripping with sarcasm as he let out a casual, “Ow.” Growling, Cloud Kicker took to the air and zipped around him, jabbing him in a half dozen different spots, trying to get a feel for any sensitive or weak places.

Not a BUCKING thing. She swore as she backed off. It was like fighting a mountain! Even if this guy was as big, burly and (hopefully) slow and clumsy as he looked, he could still win simply by outlasting her while she wore herself down. A sudden backhoofed blow caught Cloud Kicker in the chest and sent her careening into wall.

Stars exploded in front of her eyes. She groaned and rubbed her head. Her vision swam and came back into focus just in time to see her opponent standing over her. “Oh, horseapples.”

A small bread roll sailed through the air and bounced harmlessly off the side of its head. “You leave my sister alone!”

Cloud Kicker snapped to attention. “Alula!” She turned her head in horror to see Alula clutching a hoofull of breadrolls and tossing them one by one at the changeling.

Grumbling, the brute turned and bore down upon the tiny filly. Cloud Kicker was on her hooves and flapping her wings before she was even cognizant of it. “You don’t touch her! You don’t even look at her!” She bellowed as she tackled him from behind with enough force to actually manage to knock him down.

For all of ten seconds. The brute bucked Cloud off and angrily got back to its feet. It growled angrily, reminding Cloud Kicker of a thunderstorm about to break. At least he forgot about Alula… She gulped as she started flying. The a high-pitched buzzing made her look back. Her opponent had somehow managed to get his wings to support his considerable bulk into the air and was pursuing her with surprising speed. The snarling visage on his face promised Cloud that she was in for a world of hurt.

She just smiled. I was a competitor in the Best Young Flyer competition. I may not be Rainbow Dash, but I can out-maneuver a giant bug anyday of the week. Cloud waggled her rear at her pursuer and stuck out her tongue. You’re in my domain now. Time to kiss the sky!

As she flew above the chaos she saw that Trender Hoof and Hoity Toity had grabbed some legs off a broken table and were swinging them wildly. They hadn’t come close to hitting anything, but the changelings seemed to be giving them a wide berth. And they were nearly as distracting as Photo Finish—who would randomly seem to pop up in front of the changelings, flash her camera on its brightest setting, blinding them.

Another one of the hulking, giant changelings strode forth easily swatting aside any resistance—or anything that didn’t just get out of its way fast enough. He bore down on a surrounded Shining Armor, who was warding of a narrowing circle of changelings from enveloping him. They hissed and spat, but stayed back, wary of his magic.

The elite had no such concern. He charged right towards the Guard captain and wasted no time raining blows on his head and neck. For his troubles he got a blast of magic to the face, which barely even phased the changeling. With a heave and a shove, Shining Armor was picked up and bodily thrown down.

Shining Armor groaned, looking up to see an enormous chitinous hoof growing larger as it came down to stomp him—the irony didn’t escape him.

The changeling barely caught a flash of red in the corner of his eye before he heard somepony say, “Eenope!” The brute barely had time to look up before a red hoof the size of a dinner plate cold-cocked him. It was out cold before it even hit the ground.

“Thanks…” Shining wheezed as Big Macintosh helped him up. “How about you get beat up by the next one and I come rescue you?”

“Eenope.”

While other guests screamed and fled, or fought in a manner that could be better described as ‘flailing about and hoping that hits something’ Fancy Pants was another story. Armed with nothing more than a detached table leg, his monocle and his normal debonair look, he waded into the fray lashing out at changeling after changeling. He wielded the blunt wooden leg like a rapier in the hooves of a master fencer.

As one particularly unfortunate changeling found out as Fancy’s makeshift sword jabbed it in the gut and then thwacked it across his head. Fancy Pants’ companion Fleur de Lis cheered on in appreciation. “Brava, mon amour! Brava! Vous êtes magnifique!”

Fancy smiled as he saluted her. "I love it when you speak Prench, Fleur. Speak some more."

Cloud Kicker continued to fly, circling the room as she avoided her pursuer. These were her ponies. She might not be Rainbow Dash and these weren’t her heroic friends … but they were still Equestrians. And they weren’t afraid. That’s why we’ll beat them.

As the battle raged behind them, Rainbow Dash and her friends raced through the castle.

“Sounds like quite the ruckus going on back there!” Applejack called to her friends. “Any chance we know where to start looking for the Princess?”

“The tower!” Pinkie Pie called out. “The Princess is always locked up in the tower!”

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Anypony else have any ideas?”

“Pinkie’s right!” Twilight spoke up, surprising everypony present, save Pinkie, who merely beamed.

“Uh, mind running that one past me again?” Applejack asked.

Twilight explained. “Towers are isolated, there’s only one way in or out unless you have wings, they’re out of the way—there’s a reason why it’s a commonly used story trope. If Chrysalis has Princess Celestia held in the castle, it’s the most likely location.”

Flying overhead, Rainbow nodded as she thought about it. “Yeah, the Princess always raises the sun from her tower. And the guards and staff usually respect her privacy enough to leave it alone if she asked them to.”

“Then that’s where we’ll go.” The group ran full tilt through the hallways, not stopping for anything. It seemed that Chrysalis must have pulled most of her forces to the wedding, because they didn’t encounter anyone—pony or changeling—as they went. It made the castle unnaturally empty and quiet.

The entryway to the tower lay behind a gold-rimmed doorway. The tower staircase itself spiraled upwards. Trying to track its path up with their eyes only resulted in giving the ponies a headache. It was a long trek, the group panting after five minutes of a stubborn, upward climb.

“Why … are there … so many … stairs?” Fluttershy panted as she weakly dragged herself up yet another flight.

“You know, you do have wings.” Pinkie Pie flapped her forelegs demonstratively, actually managing to lift herself off the ground a bit.

Twilight’s eyes lit up. “I think we’ve made it!” She pointed at the large, ornate doors that stood before them. “She must be on the other side!”

“Don’t suppose anypony fig’red that the Queen locked the door or nothin’?” Applejack asked as they approached.

“Not a problem,” Rainbow retorted. “I brought the key. Stand back.” Seeing her intent, her friends scattered to give her room. Rainbow backed up as far as she could go…then zoomed straight at the door, hooves outstretched. The doors shuddered, even bent inwards a bit, but didn’t give way.

She began bucking at the door.

“Let me help, let me help!” Pinkie joined them, banging on the door.

“Actually,” Twilight’s horn sparkled. “Allow me. Stand back, everypony.”

The group scattered, giving Twilight plenty of room. Her brow furrowed in concentration, Twilight unleashed her magic against the door—blowing a hole clean through it. Fluttershy blinked. “Oh my…”

“Hope those were insured.” Rainbow joked weakly, once more impressed by the startling magical strength Twilight could wield. “I’ll go in first,” she announced and started forward before any of the others could raise an objection.

The inner chamber was almost pitch black, a grave departure from the room’s normal standards. It seemed the windows had been sealed shut and any other form of light had been removed. It would have been impossible to see were it not for faint green luminescent ooze that coated sections of the walls and ceiling.

“I can hardly say I like the decor,” Rarity commented as she gingerly stepped in, stiffening and barely repressing a shriek as she stepped in some glop.

“It’s darker than the insides of a timber wolf’s heart.” Applejack offered, looking around. “But Ah don’t see the Princess anywhere.”

Rainbow Dash stomped her hoof. “No! She has to be here! We can’t turn all of Canterlot upside down to look for her!”

“We don't have to!” Pinkie Pie suddenly called out, pointing up. “She’s already upside down!” The others looked up…and gaped at the sight of several large cocoons made of the same green whatever-it-was. There were ponies inside: guards, guests … and the largest one contained a familiar face.

“Celestia!” Rainbow flew up, tapping her hoof on the thing encasing her mentor. Celestia’s eyes were opened, but unfocused. A momentary panic swelled inside her. “Twilight, bring her down!” She looked around, spotting ponies in other cocoons … as well as one familiar looking zebra. “And Zecora too!”

Twilight nodded. Her magic wrapped itself around both cocoons and gently dragged them down to the ground, where she started prying them open.

Zecora stirred first, raising a shaky a hoof. “S’all right, we got ya…” Applejack helped her up. “You okay, sugarcube?”

Wiping the green ichor from her face, Zecora moaned. “I think I shall need a very thorough shower before I feel again at full power.” She rubbed at her temples, wincing. “My head … I feared that I would stay in that pod until I were dead.”

“Do you know what’s going on?” Twilight asked as she set about trying to crack the pod holding Celestia, which was proving much more stubborn.

Leaning against Applejack—who shuddered at the goop on her—Zecora nodded weakly. “They replaced your Princess with the changeling queen—to further their domination scheme.”

“Yeah, they’ve got the cream of the cream of Equestria trapped in the wedding hall,” Rainbow nodded, ignoring Rarity’s muttered correction that it was “Crème de la crème.”

“We could use some of your magic majumbos or your mystic stuff to help take care of the bug army they brought.” She threw a few quick jabs and punches for emphasis. “You know, get all zebra-fu on their flanks.”

“Thoraxes,” Twilight corrected.

“Whatever.” Rainbow leaned forward, her muzzle almost touching Zecora’s. “Can you do it?”

With a sigh and a grimace, the zebra shook her head. “I’m afraid my usual bag of tricks will not get us out of this fix. Plus it is…difficult to think clearly at present. I feel as helpless as…as…” she seemed to struggle to find a rhyme. “As a pheasant,” she finished lamely.

“Are you okay?” Fluttershy asked. “Did they hurt you?”

Zecora shook her head, then instantly regretted it as another painful throb forced her eyes shut. “After Rainbow got away, the changelings brought me here to stay. They tried to drain my feelings, as they stuck me there on the ceiling. I entered into meditation so I would feel no emotion, which caused the hungry changelings some commotion.” She swept her drooping mohawk out of her face, trying to stand tall. “It was a very trying time … I’m almost too tired to even rhyme.”

“I bet.” Rainbow looked Zecora over. “You look like horseapples.”

“Wow. Tactful.” Applejack drawled as she stood beside the weary zebra. “Easy goes there, just lean against me if’n ya have to. I got you.” She nodded once to Rainbow Dash. “I think Princess Celestia’s coming arou—” Rainbow was gone before she could even finish.

Celestia was looking anything but regal as she stood shakily, her limbs trembling and her eyes glassy and unfocused. But as soon as Rainbow Dash saw her, she just knew that everything was going to be all right. She almost knocked her over as she embraced her teacher.

“R-rainbow…” Celestia croaked, enfolding her student in her giant wings. “I am so glad to see you…”

“Me too.” Rainbow buried her face in Celestia’s chest. “The real you, I mean.”

A dry chuckle escaped the princess. “I understand.” She let out a groan as she stretched.

Seeing her so weak was jarring. Rainbow’s ears flattened. “Are you—okay?”

“I am fine. Just … drained.” The Princess closed her eyes and shook her head. “It will pass.”

Twilight gulped nervously. “Did they … feed … on you?”

“Chrysalis tried.” Celestia drew herself up. “But she found me a bit too tough to chew.”

“Boy, it’s a good thing Cloud Kicker isn’t here.” Pinkie Pie tossed out. “Otherwise things would get weird—”

“Pinkie!” Rainbow snapped. “Did not need to hear that…”

Princess Celestia tentatively flexed her wings. “When she found that she could not drain me, she instead assured that I would remain awake … for the entire time I was cocooned.”

“And how long was that?” Rainbow wondered.

“A week.” Celestia grimaced. “It was unpleasant.” Her tone and judicious choice of words made it clear that she was understating the case.

Pinkie Pie winced. “Ooooh. I did that once. See, the Cakes bought these little sticks full of sugar and … it wasn’t pretty. And then there was that time Applejack had to harvest—”

“Not now,” Applejack grumbled curtly, not appreciating the reminder.

Rainbow Dash looked at Celestia, as if only now seeing the bags under her eyes, the drooping of her wings—even her always flowing mane and tail seemed to move slower. “But you can still beat her, right?”

Princess Celestia looked her in the eye and Rainbow saw strength and determination there. “I will not fail my little ponies,” she promised. “Where is the Queen now?”

Twilight hesitantly stepped forward. “Chrysalis—trapped all the guests at my brother and Cadance’s wedding. She’s going to replace them all and rule Equestria through their duplicates.”

“Not while I still stand.” Celestia took a shaky step forward. Then another and another. “Come, my student. Equestria needs us.”

Things had only grown more chaotic in the wedding hall. While an individual changeling may not have been the most formidable of foes, the sheer crushing weight of them working in concert were pressing the ponies to the breaking point.

Even Big Macintosh’s strength, Fancy Pants’ swashbuckling, Shining Armor and Cadance’s magic or Derpy’s destructive backside could only carry them so far.

It fell upon even the littlest of ponies to make their own contributions. “Hey! Mistuh bug!” A confused changeling turned to see Dinky Doo sitting on one of the remaining tables. Clutched in her hooves was a fire extinguisher. “It’s fwooshin’ time!” She sprayed the changeling in the face with foam, causing it to shriek and run off, blinded.

“Where’d you get that?” Pipsqueak asked as he stood nearby, clutching a small broken leg chair like a sword.

“Miss Pinkie always leaves some around when Mommy’s at a party.” Dinky explained. “Just in case she makes something go fwooshy.” She paused. “Mommy makes things get fwooshy a lot.”

Alula growled fiercely, putting on her best warface. It must have been working, she thought, for no changelings came anywhere near the tiny trio.

But the real cause for the foals protection lay with the all-seeing eyes of Derpy Hooves. Any changeling she spied drawing too near the foals—hers or not—soon found themselves on the receiving end of a mother’s fury. Her golden, misaligned eyes would haunt the nightmares of many a changeling.

Cloud Kicker banked around a column and zipped around behind the ceiling. The changeling captain pursuing her might fly like an oversized brick, but it showed no sign of tiring anytime soon. Even if it couldn’t fly faster than her, it would eventually catch up with her through sheer endurance. She was just lucky no other changeling had intervened to help. Guess the big guy wants me all to himself…

This wasn’t a fight she could win. But as her father taught her, if you can’t win a fair fight, don’t fight fair. Cloud pulled a hairpin turn around a column and faced her pursuer. “Hey bug breath! What’s the only thing smaller than your brain?” She shot him an impish grin and was rewarded with a scowl. As they drew closer together, she saw his forelegs tense, telegraphing his next move. The second he began to throw his punch, she had already begun ducking underneath it, getting within his range. “Your—” she lashed out with her hooves, hitting them right between his hindlegs. She winced with pain as her hooves impacted against solid armor, almost cracking her hoof. “Balls!” Cloud yowled as she clutched her hoof.

The changing chuckled, not even put out. Stupid non-mammalian biology, Cloud Kicker swore as she nursed her bruised hoof.

“I believe it’s my turn…” the behemoth rumbled, his massive foreleg swinging with such force that he only narrowly missed taking Cloud’s head off with it. With all thought of her injured hoof temporarily dispelled, Cloud beat her wings, double time. With an annoyed growl, the chase continued. “When I catch you, your friends won’t even recognize the remains...”

“You mean you’re not gonna feed on my love?” Cloud shot back. “Because I’ve got plenty to go around—just ask my friends!” She weaved around some drapes, casting them in front of the changeling. It just barreled on through, ripping through them with barely any difficulty. “Oh come on!”

That made it chuckle darkly. “You can’t elude me forever.”

“Been doing a good job so far!” she shot back, fighting to hide how winded she was. “I can keep this up—all day. Especially since you’re so slow!” Her eyes widened as she got an idea. The first part was her favorite: make him mad. “Seriously, did you just wake up from a seven year nap with the rest of the cicadas? Is that it?”

A low growl was her only answer. Cloud Kicker decided to show off a bit—or, as she liked to put it, let out my inner Rainbow Dash—she did a few weaves and corkscrew turns, even slowing down just enough to let her tail dangle mere inches from her foe’s muzzle. “Come on, I thought you’d be faster, what with being all streamlined down there, you know?” In a final display of ego, Cloud rolled onto her back and demonstratively yawned, closing her eyes as she flew. “And I’m not the fastest flyer around, but I could outfly you in my sleep!”

“Enjoy your sleep,” the changeling captain growled, incensed. “For you’ll soon take a permanent dirt nap.” With a bright flash of green, his body shifted into the blue coat and rainbow mane of Cloud’s oldest friend, calculating that this would put his opponent off. The changeling put on a burst of speed, grabbing Cloud Kicker. “I have you now!”

But she just grinned back at him. “Same here!” He might have been faster now—but he wasn’t superstrong and armored, either. Which she gently reminded him of by ramming her hindlegs into his stomach. The changeling had forgotten that while Rainbow Dash was an amazing flyer, she was hardly indestructible.

And Cloud Kicker may have been Rainbow Dash’s friend, but simply putting on her face wouldn’t stop Cloud from doing what she needed to. She rained a series of blows on the transformed changeling, knocking him from the sky. A satisfied grin crossed her muzzle as he hit the floor. Second-stringers or now, ponies could take care of themselves when push came to shove.

Looking down at the long spiraling stairwell, Applejack whistled. “Um, Ah hate t’sound impatient—that’s Rainbow’s job—but we gotta beat hooves back t’save mah sister and all them ponies back at the wedding!” She tugged her hat down sheepishly in apology to the Princess. “And, begging yer pardon, yer highness, you uh, don’t look like you’re in a right shape to do it.”

Zecora nodded. “It is true, time we must not waste. If we are to stop them, we must make haste.”

Celestia sighed. “I had hoped to conserve my strength for my confrontation with Chrysalis—but we cannot delay while my little ponies are in jeopardy.” Her horn lit up and she closed her eyes. There was a blinding flash of white magic and the group vanished from the tower and reappeared in the hallway leading to the wedding hall.

Before anypony Rainbow could ask why they didn’t just appear in the hall itself, Celestia let out a cry and fell to her knees, panting. “That…took more out of me than expected.” She winced as Rainbow Dash and Applejack went to her side, helping her to her hooves.

“S’okay—no big deal. Could happen to anypony.” Rainbow looked over to Twilight. “Twi, you can do that teleporting thing, right?”

The look Twilight gave her would later be placed in the dictionary next to the word ‘incredulous.’ She facehooved. “Rainbow Dash, if I could do that anytime I wanted, don’t you think I would’ve used it before now? It’s a very complicated and difficult spell—I can usually only cast it when I’m running on adrenaline.”

“Remind me to ask the Princess to give you some pointers.” Rainbow groaned. “Cuz that’d be something really useful to have about now.”

“That can still be arranged,” everypony and zebra looked to see Queen Chrysalis, in her natural form, standing before them. “I can ensure that you all vanish.” She narrowed her eyes at Celestia. “I see you found my little collection—and you even located your missing Princess too.”

Rainbow flared her wings and confronted her. “You bet we did! You better start running, because you’re gonna be sorry!” She looked to see the Princess striding forward, Applejack and Twilight flanking her … but the Changeling ruler was unphased.

Chrysalis’ fangs glinted when she smiled. “Oh, Celestia how are you? You look a bit … peaked.” She chuckled.

“I know what you have done … and why.” Princess Celestia frowned. “You kept me awake so I could not talk to my sister in my dreams.”

“The fact that it also makes you look awful is a delightful bonus.” Chrysalis practically purred as she approached. “You could try taking a quick nap—but then, you’d be abandoning your precious subjects. How would that look in the history books? ‘Canterlot falls while Celestia snoozes?’”

The two stopped, their horns pressing against each other like swords in a duel. “Cease your churlish taunts.” Celestia’s tone hardened. “I have stood against evils far greater than you—I will not fail now.”

Rainbow Dash leaned over to Twilight as they watched the two sovereigns gird themselves for a fight. “Um, Twilight?”

Her friend looked at her, her knees shaking slightly. “Yes?”

“Feeling nervous?”

“I think that’s a safe assumption.”

“So, the heart’s pounding, the adrenaline pumping?” Dash prodded, getting Twilight to practically grind her teeth.

“Yes, Rainbow—what’s your point?”

But Rainbow ignored her tone. “Well, if your adrenaline is up and you’re feeling energized and stuff—care to take a stab at teleporting?”

Twilight’s eyes widened as she understood. “Oh…” She nodded. “Right…hold on!” She concentrated, her horn shimmering brightly. “Here goes—something!”

A white light spread out from her horn, encompassing themselves, Zecora and Princess Celestia. Chrysalis’ growled. “Oh not you don’t!” Her own twisted horn began to glow as she charged toward the group. There was a blinding flash and then Rainbow Dash felt the world seem to fall away…only to suddenly return with a vengeance. Her vision swam as she stumbled to the side, unsure of where she was.

“Easy Rainbow!” Dash’s ear flicked as Cloud Kicker spoke in to it. “I got you.”

Rainbow blinked until her vision came back into focus—and she found herself staring into the face of her friend. “CK? The hay?” She looked around and found herself back in the Wedding hall. A sudden surge of worry gripped her. “Where are the others? What happened?”

The other pony grumbled something that sounded like, ‘Glad to see you too.’ Cloud looked around the room. “I don’t know. You and the others just appeared a second ago.” She hesitated. “And, uh, you’re smoking hot.”

Rainbow facehooved. “Really, Cloud? Now isn’t the time for—”

“No, I mean you’re literally smoking!” Cloud interrupted, pointing urgently. Rainbow Dash turned to look and saw several scorch marks on her fur and a wisp or two of smoke rising from the end of her mane. Cloud Kicker set about patting Rainbow down, extinguishing any smoking spots lest they flare up—she also didn’t take the opportunity to grope Rainbow’s rump. Too much, anyway.

Rainbow hardly noticed, she was too busy looking for her friends. Cloud Kicker filled her in. “You suddenly appearing with the Princess and the rest of the girls kinda threw the bugs of for a loop.” She nodded at the far end of the room, where the changelings were regrouping, breaking off from attacking the party goers in favor of putting some distance between them and Princess Celestia.

But Rainbow Dash was only half listening. She looked around and spotted Applejack and Rarity rushing over to their younger sisters—Applejack’s hat was somehow now on Rarity’s head and slightly smoking. Rarity’s own mane seemed singed too. She’d no doubt be shrieking bloody murder once she realized.

With a dazed groan, Twilight stumbled over to Rainbow Dash and Cloud Kicker. “My head…” she held it delicately, the tip of her horn simmering.

Cloud opened her mouth—no doubt a lame pick up line, but Rainbow forestalled her. “You okay?”

Twilight nodded and then grimaced, instantly regretting it. “I told you that teleportation wasn’t easy—especially not with Queen Chrysalis getting in the way. She made me mess up the spell matrix.”

Rainbow Dash nodded like she had any idea what Twilight was talking about. “Guess that’s why Rarity got AJ’s hat and why we’re all slightly—” she frowned as she saw the blackened tip of her rainbow tail. “Charred.” Her ear flicked as a thought occurred to her. “Have you seen Fluttershy or Pinkie Pie?”

A sudden shout from above answered her question. “I’m up here! Hi!” They looked up to find Pinkie Pie hanging from a chandelier. “This is fun! One minute I was in the hallway with you and the girls and Zecora and Princess Celestia and Queen Meany and then I was just hanging around here! Get it?” She giggled. “‘Hanging around?’” She swung back and forth. “Wee! This is the funnest thing ever to have a wedding…unless there was bungee jumping! Because what’d be cooler than bungee jumping in from the ceiling just as the bride and groom say I do? That’s how I wanna be married!”

Grumbling slightly, Rainbow shook her head. “Just get down here.”

“Hmm…okay! Twilight catch me!”

“What?! Pinkie—!” Twilight tried to object, but had already let go and was currently falling. Twilight’s eyes grew wide as Pinkie came closer. With a panicked cry she grabbed the dropping pony with her magic, closing her eyes in the event that she was too late.

When she didn’t find herself flattened by a falling Pinkie Pie, Twilight chanced peeking out—to find Pinkie staring right into her eyes. She had stopped barely a hooflength from landing on her. “Boop!” A pink hoof reached out and gently pressed against Twilight’s muzzle. Rainbow let out a laugh.

Sighing, Twilight set Pinkie down. “Well, at least she’s okay.”

For the moment, Rainbow thought as she surveyed the scene. It looked like the sudden appearance of the Princess—plus the baddest flank kickers in Equestria, she couldn’t help add—had spooked the Changelings. She saw Queen Chrysalis barking out commands, trying to get them back in some semblance of order.

She looked over at the pony-side of the room and everything seemed okay. For a moment, Dash felt hopeful … until she realized something. “Where’s Fluttershy?!”

Outside, Fluttershy huddled underneath a bush in the castle’s garden. She had appeared in the gardens by herself. Where the Princess or her friends were, she had no idea. That was then the changelings spotted her...

Chapter 16

Queen Chrysalis was pleased. While she had been unable to prevent the Elements of Harmony from rescuing Princess Celestia (as well as that meddlesome zebra), things still stood strongly in her favor.

True, the pampered wedding guests had put up more of a fight than she would have thought them capable of—but they were outnumbered and trapped. The escape of Celestia’s student and her friends had threatened that, but instead of warning their fellow ponies of the danger, they went straight for Celestia herself to solve things.

Fools, she thought dismissively. Secrecy is a changeling’s chief weapon. By isolating the castle and those within it from the rest of the city, they’re helpless. They had a chance to break out and warn an entire city full of ponies; they would’ve descended upon us and ruined my plans. But no, they gave up that chance in lieu of finding their precious princess and bringing her back in the hopes of stopping me. Her fangs glinted as she smiled, a truly terrible thing to behold. Their Princess is a spent force and their sixth—the timid one—is nowhere to be seen. There’ll be no magic artifacts to save Canterlot now.

She strode forward, flanked by her subjects, all eyes—pony and changeling—soon focusing on her. As they should be. “Now then, where was I?” She looked around. “Ah yes, I believe I was about to cement my take over of your pathetic home.”

“No. You won’t.” Right on cue, Princess Celestia made herself known. Ponies quickly cleared a path for her, stopping halfway between the ponies and the changelings. “Chrysalis,” Celestia’s stern glare was undercut by the dark rings around her eyes. Her wings drooped and she was swaying slightly. “You are … looking as foul as ever.”

The changeling queen didn’t let Celestia get under her chitin. “Hello pot, I’m kettle. Have we met?”

In truth, Celestia knew that she wasn’t anywhere near at the top of her game. But with her little ponies behind her and an enemy in front of her, there was no second thought given to where she stood. “You have attacked my subjects, replaced them with your vile brood, and are trying to take over and despoil a land of peace and plenty.” Celestia’s horn began to glow with a bright golden light. “You will not succeed.”

“How cliche. And now you expect me to say something equally banal such as, ‘I’ve already gotten away with it?’” Chrysalis shook her head. “This isn’t one of your old mare’s tales where the tired, wounded heroine suddenly finds herself able to nobly save the day all on her own. I know how to make preparations and plan ahead, instead of blundering into a situation relying on brute magic strength to carry you through.” Then she chuckled airily, as if brushing the whole thing off. “But enough about me, let’s kill you!”

She suddenly rushed at Celestia, horn lowered to take her in the chest. Caught off guard and with her reflexes slowed, Celestia only narrowly managed to parry with her own horn. They tested their opponent’s strength and speed in this manner before breaking apart. Chrysalis summoned a blazing green blast of fire from her horn. Unable to get out of the way in time, several of Celestia’s feathers caught fire and were burnt. A dismayed moan rose from the ponies as a chorus of gleeful sounding hisses and buzzes came from the changelings.

Celestia created a bright golden beam of magical energy—only for Chrysalis to swat it aside with her own magic. Chrysalis was doing something worse than beating the Princess. She was toying with her.

In the gardens, Fluttershy fled through the gardens in a blind panic. Her heart beat so loud it almost drowned out the sound of the changelings pursuing her. Almost.

A sob caught in her throat, her muscles aching with pain. A startled whimper escaped from her burning lungs as she looked around in vain for any sign of Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Twilight or anypony else to help her. But she was alone. Fluttershy ran as fast as her hooves would carry her, the buzzing wings of the changelings never far behind. She had no clear goal of where she was going, except away.

The hissing of the changelings grew louder, signaling they were gaining on her. Fluttershy could almost feel their hot, rancid breath on her tail. She turned a corner and promptly dove into some bushes, startling several birds out and temporarily distracting her pursuers.

The two changelings hissed and shrieked until the birds had been dispersed. But they had lost track of their quarry. They looked at each other. “Great. Now what?” the one on the right asked.

The other shrugged, his luminous green eyes peeled for any sign of her. “We find her. Unless you care to explain to the Queen that we let one of them go.”

“We could probably just grab some other pony,” his companion grumbled. “They all look the same to me.”

That prompted an incredulous eye roll from the other. “Let’s just find her and report back. Otherwise we’ll be left with nothing but scraps from the feast in the main hall.”

“Agreed.” They began circling around. Fluttershy curled up into as small a ball as she could manage and hid beneath the bushes. Her heart almost stopped when she saw a chitinous leg stop mere inches from her hiding place.

“Why would ponies even keep a place like this? What purpose does it serve?”

“There’s no making sense of them…” the other replied. “Although I do hear that they’re delicious.”

His companion hissed back, “Orders are to bring this one back with the others.” He paused. “Although I have heard good things about pony quiche…”

Fluttershy couldn’t help but let out a tiny whimper. Unfortunately, it was just loud enough to be heard. Seeing the two changelings looking in her direction, Fluttershy tried to leap out of the bushes to flee—only to find her wings and tail tangled up in the bushes. “Oh dear…”

The changelings advanced, eyes and fangs glinting with menace. Fluttershy shrank back.
“S-stay back! I don’t want to have to hurt you.”

A loud mixture of skrees and hisses burst forth from the changelings. They were laughing. They made their approach only to find themselves suddenly blocked by a small, angry looking white bunny. The pair exchanged confused glances at each other and shrugged. When they began to be pelted with small stones, they hissed and tried to attack Angel, but he darted away into the bushes.

“Should we follow it?” the first changeling wondered.

The other was dismissive. “If you want to explain to the Queen why you were chasing a rabbit around, be my guest. Now, let’s just get our prisoner and—what?!” He let out a shocked yelp when something red and fiery suddenly invaded his vision.

Fluttershy looked up in amazement. “Philomena? Angel?!” The white rabbit reappeared, hopping up onto the phoenix’s back.

The changeling growled in annoyance. “All right, if you want to get in our way I suppose we could have a snack before dinner…”

“Uh…” His companion tapped him on the carapace. “We might need some backup.”

With a disgusted glower, the other turned. “What are you talking...abouuuu….” He trailed off when he noticed the two of them were now surrounded by a ring of animals: rabbits, squirrels, raccoons, opossums, otters, a very intimidating looking buzzard and an array of smaller birds.

It wasn’t until the rather large, annoyed looking bear arrived that the changeling duo realized they might be in over their heads.

“Hi, Harry,” Fluttershy waved. “Um, could you please give me a paw?” With a grumbled roar, Harry trudged over and gently untangled Fluttershy from her predicament. “Thank you, Harry.” She turned to the changelings. “You threatened a cute, harmless little bunny?!”

“I wouldn’t say harmless…” one of the changelings muttered, idly rubbing where one of the rocks had hit him.

Fluttershy didn’t even hear him. “NO ONE HURTS MY ANGEL BUNNY!” she bellowed, her eyes suddenly piercing and sharp. She charged at the changelings and every animal in the royal gardens charged with her.

The other changeling smacked his companion on the head before screaming, “RUN!” And run they did.

Twilight Sparkle and the others watched the duel between the two powerful sovereigns intently. She cast a worried look over to Rainbow Dash, who was steadfastly ignoring it, or any other signs of fear or despair coming from the rest of the pony crowd. All her attention was on her teacher, fighting for all of them. But Twilight couldn’t help but notice how Celestia’s hooves dragged, how her reflexes would slow and how her spells were growing less and less powerful.

She was losing.

When Rainbow wouldn’t look over, Twilight hesitantly spoke up. “Rainbow Dash?”

“Not now,” Rainbow leaned forward, as if trying to bolster Celestia through her attentiveness. “She’s got that bug right where she wants her!”

Her statement was punctuated by another exchange of magical blasts, one Chrysalis nimbly avoided. Celestia, on the other hoof, staggered, trying not to fall over.

“Rainbow—” Twilight struggled to get the words out. “She can’t win.” In a heartbeat, Dash had whirled on her, eyes flashing with anger. Twilight cringed as she prepared to get yelled at—only to see Rainbow crumple up on the inside, her head and wings drooping.

“I know,” she grimaced as if physically pained.

“She’s the Princess … and even she can’t win.” Rarity chewed her lip worriedly.

That made Rainbow stomp her hoof. “She could have fried that bug so fast she would’ve been mistaken for Prench food if she hadn’t been stuck awake in that cocoon for the last week!” Dash snapped. “It’s—cheating is what it is!”

Twilight blinked as something occurred to her. “Wait … that’s it! I know why Chrysalis did it! Keep Princess Celestia awake that entire time, I mean.”

Applejack looked glum. “Ah think we fig’red that out, to keep her so tired that a stiff breeze would knock ‘er over.”

“No, that’s not it,” Twilight shook her head. “Remember back in the Crystal Empire? When Dinky was unconscious, Princess Luna was able to enter her dreams and deliver a message to us. By keeping the Princess awake, Chrysalis made sure she couldn’t get in contact with Princess Luna!”

“So—if we can get Celestia to take a nap, she could tell Luna what’s wrong and have her come help!” Rainbow grinned fiercely, then paused. “Wait. How long do you think would it take her to arrive?”

Twilight helplessly shrugged. “I don’t know. I really don’t know what the Princesses are capable of. Few ponies do.”

“That would mean that if Celestia gets some much needed beauty rest, we’d have nopony else to stop the Queen,” Rarity observed. “Without Fluttershy we can’t use the Elements of Harmony and there’s no telling how long it would take Princess Luna to arrive—or if she’ll even get the message.”

“We don’t exactly have a lot of other options,” Rainbow Dash looked to her friends. “We’re going to have to buy some time for her; distract Chrysalis while Celestia tries to get Luna.”

Pinkie Pie frowned. “But we’d need something totally unpredictable. Something reckless. An uncontrollable force of nature! We need—” She paused expectantly.

An uncomfortable silence settled over the group and everypony tilted their head at her. “Pinkie, what are you doing?” Twilight asked.

“Oh, sorry, guess my timing’s off,” Pinkie pouted. “Usually when I say stuff like that something amazing happens!”

“What do you—?” Before Twilight could even finish, the doors to the room were slammed open by a pair of panicked changelings. They hastily slammed them shut again, but this proved futile as the doors were simply knocked down by a stampede of animals

A flock of birds poured through the gap and spread out, everything from sparrows and hummingbirds to falcons and buzzards. Squirrels, rabbits, beavers and even a large bear barrelled into the hall, scattering the changelings as he knocked them over. Standing on his back was Fluttershy, leading the charge.

Her friends were simply stupefied. All except for Pinkie Pie, who said, “And just imagine the impact that would’ve had if they had been on cue!”

Rainbow Dash recovered first. “Come on, get to the Princess!” She zoomed ahead. A ring of changelings surrounded Celestia during the duel. The first one she encountered was dropped by a blow to the jaw before it could even react. The one beside it, now aware of her, hissed and bared its fangs at Rainbow. Dash flew up, avoiding its lunge and kicked it in the face. As she brought down another changeling with an uppercut, she mused that this was much more enjoyable than the stuff Princess Celestia had her do as her student. It might not even make for a bad dream, come to think of it...

Soon she had broken through and made it to Celestia. Her battle with Chrysalis had been interrupted by a bunny stampede, and Chrysalis was now busy fending off some vengeful birds pecking at her chitin. Dash started tugging at her mentor’s wing. “Celestia!”

The Princess looked down, gasping for breath and sweating heavily. “R-Rainbow…”

“You okay?!” She positioned herself to help prop Celestia up from the side, taking the weight off her hooves.

The Princess took several deep breaths to steel herself, but her knees wobbled. “I ... I have strength enough for this. Chrysalis must be stopped ... no matter the cost." But all the strong words could not hide the weariness of her voice, nor the sluggishness of her movements. "I must defend my little ponies."

Rainbow Dash blocked her path, keeping her from Chrysalis. “Are you nuts?! You look like you have three hooves in the grave! You're giving it your all—but you can't beat her like this!” She had hoped that Celestia would deny it; telling her that she could indeed defeat the evil Queen. Instead, Rainbow Dash's words were met with an ominous silence. "We have a plan!" She urged Celestia. "Well, Twilight does. We need you to go to sleep to talk to Luna!

An incredulous looked briefly banished the weariness from her face. “Go to sleep? While a monster rampages through the palace and my little ponies are counting on me to protect them?”

“But you could call Luna back!” Dash retorted. “She can take care of Chrysalis and her bug army!”

“How long would it take her to arrive?” Celestia demanded. “How many ponies suffer or die while they waited for Luna? Ponies I can still save.”

Rainbow Dash didn’t have an easy answer for that. It was a gamble—but it had the only possibility of winning. “Celestia—look at yourself! I could kick your flank right now, nevermind Chrysalis.” She let that sink in for a moment. “You don’t have to do this.”

“Yes, I do. “Celestia shook her head. “"This is my responsibility, one I've born for countless centuries. I am here to safeguard and protect all life in Equestria. I cannot lay that that burden down for another to pick up.” She exhaled. “I ... I can still fight. I must for my subjects. For Equestria.” With a sad, tired smile she wearily nuzzled Rainbow Dash. “And for you, my faithful student.”

“You can't carry everything on your shoulders, no matter how big they are,” Rainbow joked weakly. “I spent last week trying to make everything better by myself—-and only made everything worse.”

“But…”

Rainbow pressed ahead. “If I had trusted them, if I had brought them in, we could've fixed this before it got worse! Instead I got convinced it was all my responsibility. I wanted to protect my friends ... only it didn't work out.” She sighed. “ No matter how awesome you are, you can never do everything by yourself. Trying to solve this without Twilight’s smarts, or Applejack’s horse sense or Pinkie’s off-the-wall whateverness—it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, and I couldn’t do it without them.”

There discussion was briefly interrupted when a stray changeling drew close. Celestia quickly drew herself in front of Rainbow Dash, shielding her—only for the changeling to be tackled by Applejack. To their left, another changeling was blasted away by Rarity’s magic and Zecora was swiftly darting her hooves out in a series of lightning strikes that laid two more out.

“See?” Rainbow pointed at the battling ponies. “My friends are stronger than you think. And so are the rest of us.” She gestured with her wing. “Even when you weren’t here, me and my friends stepped in to fight. And when we were gone—our friends and family picked up where we left off.”

Celestia stared at Rainbow Dash for for several long seconds. Then she gave her a tired smile. “Oh Rainbow Dash,” she leaned down and gently pecked her student’s forehead. “Since when were you the one teaching me lessons?”

“Since I realized I could do more with my head than just headbutt stuff," Rainbow replied. “And I saw that you needed it. So … feel free to fall asleep any time now.”

“I feel I cannot simply … turn off my mind after all this,” Celestia admitted. Rainbow winced, having experienced the sensation of being too tired to sleep.

“Oooh, crud. Just, uh, hold on a second!” She turned to her friends. “Guys! A little help here?”

Twilight winced. “Sorry, I’m still a little worn out after all that teleportation!”

Rarity trotted over. “Never fear, I’ve had to deal with Sweetie Belle when she couldn’t sleep. All it takes is some warm milk, a blanket and...” she climbed atop Rainbow Dash before the startled pegasus could even choke out a protest. Rarity delicately pressed her horn just behind Celestia’s ear. “...a little sleep spell.”

Chrysalis, having—mostly—rid herself of the birds and beasts assailing her, finally saw what Rainbow Dash and her friends were up to. “Stop them!” Chrysalis pointed at the group, her order only slightly undercut by having an otter crawl through the holes of her front leg. It scurried away before she could do anything to it, tail flicking disdainfully at her.

One changeling rushed at the Equestrian princess, only to suddenly find itself expertly hog-tied by Applejack. “Not so fast there, pardner!” She smirked as she secured the knots. “S’a good thing Ah always keep a bit o’ rope underneath my hat.”

Rarity was dumbstruck. “Do you … always possess a length of rope underneath your hat? Even during a Royal Gala Wedding?”

Applejack was equally confused. “Are you saying that you don’t?”

Shaking her head, Rarity’s horn lit up. There was a soft, almost chiming sound as Rarity’s spell took hold of Princess Celestia. Her eyes drooped and she soon gave into her exhaustion and fell asleep, slumping over—and right onto a startled Fluttershy.

Rainbow smirked. “Prepare yourself, Chryssy. The night is coming.”

Chrysalis let out an enraged shriek. “Rip them apart! I want them down now and—what?” She turned and looked outside. The others did as well. The sun was setting and the moon was rising, faster than anypony had ever seen before. The moon had never seemed as bright or full as it did just then. Trailing behind the moon like a banner of war came the night sky. It didn’t gently descend as it typically did—where before it just seemed to come with the moon, now it seemed to pour over the previously sunny sky like a descending wave.

Chrysalis felt an icy chill run up her exoskeleton. This wasn’t merely an ending of the day. It was a challenge from the Night Princess. She had raised her banner and was coming for the Queen with all her might.

For a brief moment the sky stained red. Red as rage. Red and hot as a warrior's blood surrounded the celestial body. The dark of night held no stars as the sun passed. Only the moon stood as a lone sentinel. Challenging the invading horde with piercing light against their shadowing evil.

A single shooting star shot out ahead of the rising moon, glowing brilliantly white. It grew larger and larger as it bore down on Canterlot. All eyes widened as they realized it was going to hit that very room. Cries of panic rose as it filled an entire window with blinding light—only for it to dissolve into a blue-black mist and dissolve through the window and reform on the other side. It congealed into a familiar alicorn: Princess Luna.

Queen Chrysalis hissed with fury but Luna took no notice of her. She dismissively turned her back on the invading changelings and instead stopped by her slumbering sister. Luna knelt and gently stroked Celestia’s cheek with her wing. It was only afterwards that she turned to the foe.

Chrysalis schooled her features into her typical look of disdainful scorn. “Ah, Luna.” She dipped her head in a mockery of a bow. “Princess Celestia sent you her regards, I assume?”

Luna’s face remained dark and impassive, not rising to the bait. The silence grew oppressive. It was Chrysalis who ended up breaking first. “Oh come on. Let’s get on with it; the whole ‘protection of the weak and innocent’ speech. You know you want to.”

That was when Luna finally spoke. It was just two words. “Speech this.” Within the blink of an eye Luna surged across the room, charging at Chrysalis like a rampaging bull. Chrysalis ducked her head and readied her magic. But where Celestia had dueled elegantly with her horn and her magic, Luna preferred a more hooves-on approach. As Chrysalis soon discovered when Luna planted her hoof firmly in her face.

The Changeling Queen was knocked right off her hooves and went flying back into the throngs of her minions. She rubbed her face as she got back up. With a frown, she turned and spat out a fang. The sight of her own bloody fang lying on the castle’s floors left her sputtering with rage and disbelief. “You—you actually hit me! Celestia would have never—”

Luna curtly interrupted. “As ponies have been fond of observing for more than a thousand years, I am not my sister.” Her frown grew more pronounced. “And neither are thee, foul imposter. Charlatan. Fraud. FAKE!” She was practically bellowing now. “Not only have you attempted to tyrannize all of ponykind—but you sought to do so by wearing my sister’s face!” She slammed her hooves down, leaving cracks to form in the floor beneath them. “I have heard that like an insect, if a changeling were to lose a limb or a wing, it would grow back. I’m curious to see if this also applies to your head.”

Chrysalis drew back. Without another word, Luna hurled herself at her. She rained a series of blows down on the Queen, her raw martial abilities outclassing Chrysalis’ own.

In sheer desperation, Chrysalis’ channeled her magic to her horn, creating a blinding burst of light that temporarily halted Luna’s assault. “What’s the matter?” Chrysalis hissed as she jutted forward with her horn, driving Luna back. “Afraid of the light?”

Luna’s eyes began to glow solid white. In a bright burst, she vanished. While frantically looking around, Chrysalis failed to notice the blue-black wisps wafting past, congregating behind her. An unnatural darkness fell upon the room, not merely the absence of light, but the presence of something else. “What’s the matter?” Luna tauntingly echoed back to Chrysalis as she reformed behind her. “Afraid of the dark?” She lashed out with another blow, knocking the evil queen on her side.

Chrysalis began to see how badly she had misjudged the situation. And Luna knew it as well. “I don’t need to visit your dreams to know what’s on your mind. You are thinking that you erred.’” Luna leaned in and in a voice just above a whisper said, “You’re right.”

Seeing herself outclassed, Chrysalis barked an order to her changelings. They surged, attempting to surround their Queen and overwhelm Luna. “Come on!” Rainbow Dash charged in, calling back to her friends and the rest of the ponies. “Help her out!”

There was a thundering crescendo as hundreds of hooves pounded the floor, a massive charge that carried dignitaries, wedding guests, the bride and groom themselves, a horde of garden animals, Zecora and the six Elements of Harmony into the fray. The determined number and force of the attackers caused the changelings to scatter. Secrecy and terror had been their greatest weapons, not martial strength. With their numbers advantage negated by the addition of Fluttershy’s animal host, and discouraged by the sight of Luna’s righteous fury, the changelings’ morale was shattered.

Chrysalis was simply outclassed. Luna’s speed, her strength and raw magical power was more than a match for her own. The Princess of the Night rained blow after blow on the Changeling Queen, staggering her.

But Chrysalis was stubborn. She had come too far, worked too hard, to simply yield now. “To me! Rally to me!” Despite being bruised and battered, Chrysalis managed to take to the air—although limping into the air might have been a more accurate description. The rest of the changelings followed her lead. The sound of their combined buzzing created an almost deafening cacophony, which seemed to buoy their weakened Queen. “Swarm them! Nothing can stop us!” She glared down at Luna. “You might think yourself powerful—but together, my swarm and I are invincible! I—we—are invincible!”

Luna spread her wings, standing at the vanguard of the pony herd behind her. "You're scheme is over!" Luna's magic tore at the windows, forcing them open. Soon an entire section of the wall shimmered and became transparent. Moonlight shone in, revealing the spectacle to the ponies waiting outside to see the newlywed royal couple. The expressions of horror at the monstrous black swarm were unmistakable. Chrysalis' face twisted in rage. "All of Canterlot is aware of your presence now!" Luna cried. "Your hope for a subtle infiltration and conquest is at an end!" Her horn began to glow. "Your greatest strengths are fear, surprise and numbers.”

“And ruthless efficiency!” Pinkie Pie added before being shushed.

“You no longer possess any of these.” Luna concluded. “Your only option now is brute strength—and we both know you lack the stomach for a slugging match."

Chrysalis was wroth. She wanted nothing more than to launch herself at Luna, but held herself back. She might have screwed herself up for another attack, had the night sky outside not been shattered by piercing, fierce war cries. Outside darkshapes stained the darkened horizon, growing bigger as they drew closer. On silent wings, Luna’s army swooped down. Their gray coats, pointed ears, bat-like wings and sharpened fangs leant them a dangerous air. Intimidating even to other ponies, to the changelings, these gargoyles were downright terrifying. After all, they all knew that bats eat insects.

Whatever small flicker of stubbornness survived in Chrysalis died with their first cry of challenge. Dispirited and tired, her injuries finally seemed to catch up with her as she sagged in midair. One of her larger drones had to catch her before she hit the ground. “F-flee…” Chrysalis moaned softly. “Go…”

Her bulky rescuer nodded and let out a sharp skree. The changelings broke off from engaging the ponies and moved into position, forming a barrier around their Queen. Others swooped down and picked up their injured or unconscious fellows. But Luna led her forces in pursuit, harrying the changelings and herding them away from other pony settlements. Seeing her silver-armored gargoyle ponies closing in around them, the changelings somewhat orderly retreat soon devolved into a complete rout as they panicked, flying as fast and far from Canterlot as they could. A green fire, some form of magic, encased them as they picked up speed.

The ponies in the castle watched the green dots fade and flicker into the distance until they could no longer be seen. It was not long before Luna returned in a bright flash of light, reporting that they had pursued the changelings until they were beyond the borders of Equestria. Her gargoyles, supplemented by unicorns, would patrol Canterlot to ensure no changelings remained.

It was over.

Epilogue

The Canterlot sky erupted into a an explosion of vibrant color. Cheers broke out as the citizenry of the beleaguered city celebrated the wedding of Princess Cadance and Shining Armor, but also the one week anniversary of their victory over the changelings. The Sonic Rainboom would later become identified with that victory, a sign of triumph over adversity.

But for Rainbow Dash, something felt … off with this one. Where’s the rush? she wondered. Where’s the awesomeness? Yeah this is still incredibly amazing, the ponies down there are eating it up … so why don’t I feel it? In truth, she’d been feeling pretty numb since the changeling’s defeat and the whirlwind of activities that had followed it.

Princess Luna's forces had pursued the changeling horde into the badlands, where they had gone to ground, no doubt licking their wounds. Luna informed them that it was unlikely Chrysalis would attempt anything for quite a while. Regardless, alerts had gone out across Equestria. If they attempted another invasion, the ponies would be ready.

The attack had galvanized a sentiment of unity across Equestria: earth ponies, unicorns, pegasi, seaponies, merponies, crystal ponies and even the often-avoided gargoyles (or bat ponies), considered themselves part of a single herd. It was like the Hearth's Warming Eve play, Rainbow thought, only with more hitting.

Princess Luna was seen as the hero of the day, which went a long way towards her acceptance by the general public--which had been shocked by the sudden appearance of a second Princess. But her rescue of the wedding guests, in full view of the elite of Equestria, helped cement her position in their eyes. She stepped into Celestia's horseshoes after the battle, letting Celestia recover--she ended up sleeping for a full day and a half after the fight--while Luna supervised the fallout: the citizenry needed reassurances, the ponies who had been abducted needed to be tended to and returned to their families, and the castle needed to be repaired and everything fixed up for the wedding to resume.

Cadance decided to hold off on the wedding until things had calmed down a bit. It took time for all the preparations to be redone, anyway. Rainbow Dash had scarcely seen her friends during the following week--though perhaps that was for the best.

So the Grand Galloping Gala and the Royal Wedding took place as planned, exactly one week later, on--of all days--Hearts and Hooves Day. Cadance had loved that.

At the reception, Rainbow Dash stood off by herself, watching her dance with Shining Armor. They look so happy. Part of her wanted to be out there, tearing it up on the dance floor, chowing on wedding cake, talking with ponies about her Sonic Rainboom and the battle with the changelings--but her heart just wasn’t in it.

She made her way over to one of the tables and stood half-behind some of the ice sculptures. Her ears flicked as she heard muffled voices coming from beneath one of the tables. She crouched down and lifted the tablecloth, revealing a small group of foals helping themselves to generous portions of the wedding cake. All of them stopped as soon as they saw that they had been made. "Uh, hi Rainbow Dash!" Alula grinned, her smile a touch too wide to be genuine.

Dinky hopefully pushed a plate with a slice of cake towards her, the attempt at bribery as adorable as it was obvious. "Wanna piece? This one was mine, but you can have some cuz I love you!"

"I'm good, thanks." Rainbow took a seat underneath the table joining them. "What're you kids up too?"

"Well," Apple Bloom said around a mouthful of cake. "Mah sister and Pinkie Pie made the cake..."

"And Rarity made the dresses!" Sweetie Belle chimed in.

"...so we figured, that meant we got to have an extra piece of cake!" Apple Bloom concluded with perfect foal logic. “Uh … y’all won’t tell nopony, will ya?”

Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Your secret’s safe with me. You kids doing all right?”

“We’re awesome!” Scootaloo looked up at Rainbow Dash with awe. "That Sonic Rainboom was the most amazing, spectacularly awesome coolest thing I've ever seen!"

That won a proud grin and a fond mane ruffling from her idol. "Yeah, it was pretty dang cool, wasn't it?" Dash asked.

"Ya-HUH it was!" Dinky exclaimed as she got up and hugged her godmother, settling down in her lap. Scootaloo frowned, but was appeased by Rainbow giving her a wing-hug. “It was almost as cool as you beating up all the bugs and Princess Luna going all--” she flailed her hooves in a fillyish imitation of martial arts.

“She’s the best princess ever!” Pipsqueak declared, cake frosting coating his muzzle.

Alula shook her head. “She was really cool, but Princess Celestia is even better!”

This sparked an intense intellectual exchange of ‘No way!’ and ‘Yes way!’ that made Rainbow roll her eyes. Still, if this was the worst argument between friends, then she figured they were all right. “So!” Rainbow interjected. “You guys having fun?”

Dinky nodded. “Yeah! Miss Cadance looked rilly pretty and was SUPER-nice and stuff! We had cake and I wanna go and dance an’ stuff--oh! I just remembered! Mommy said your friends were looking for you.”

Rainbow almost winced. “Oh. Thanks Dinks.” Her flat tone betrayed her unease.

“Are you okay?” Dinky asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Rainbow Dash gave her a small, encouraging smile. Dinky gave her a Get-Better Hug, squeezing her tight. “Thanks kiddo … you go have fun. I’m feeling better.”

Dinky looked at her suspiciously, “You sure? Cuz I can stay with you and stuff.”

Dash shook her head. “Nah, s’fine. You go. I’m going to go hang out with my friends. Go tear up the dance floor--and make sure your mom isn’t doing that literally.”

That made Dinky nod. “We don’t want Mommy t’break stuff! C’mon Pippy, ‘lula! Let’s dance!”

Giving an exuberant cheer, the foals rushed out and began to dance with childish exuberance and energy, and the coordination and grace to match. Rainbow spied Derpy shaking her flank to the tune of Octavia and Vinyl Scratch’s combination of classical and dub-step. They briefly met each others’ gaze, with Derpy smiling and waving--and almost smacking Trenderhoof’s head. That’s our Derpy. Rainbow Dash grinned, waving back. She left Derpy to her dancing, meandering around the reception with little rhyme or reason, until she found herself being called.

“Rainbow Dash?” She suppressed a wince as she heard Twilight’s voice behind her. Rainbow turned and saw the rest of her friends were with her. Twilight’s ears were flat and her head lowered in shame. “I--we … we wanted to talk to you. About what happened.” The others looked equally uncomfortable. Applejack removed her hat, half hiding behind it. Fluttershy had no hesitation in fully hiding--behind her mane and Rarity, who was chewing her lower lip. Even Pinkie Pie looked depressed, quite literally, as her mane had deflated.

Of course they did. Rainbow shrugged and kept her voice even. “Sure, okay. Let’s talk.”

Twilight fidgeted until Applejack put a supporting hoof on her shoulder. “Rainbow, we’re so, so sorry. We should have listened to you--should’ve believed you.” She almost seemed to shrink down into herself. “I don’t--I wish we knew how to make this right.”

That’s because there really wasn’t any, Rainbow grumbled darkly to herself. Part of her wanted to throw their apology back in their faces and tell them where they could stick it. But another part of her wanted this all to be over with with; to shove the entire mess out of her mind and never think about it again. That part won out so she shrugged as nonchalantly as she could. “It’s all right. I forgive you guys. We’re cool.”

That was what she had to say, she thought to herself. Right? The Elements of Harmony wouldn’t work if they weren’t friends and all this showed how much they needed the elements. And she was loyal. It wasn’t just her Element, it was who she was. She always stuck by her friends, her family and whatever else needed standing by. Even if they didn’t stand by her when she needed them most … the thought came unbidden and she angrily shoved it back down. It’s over. They said sorry and I accepted it. I’m not gonna think about it any more.

But then Applejack cleared her throat. “Sugarcube … Ah don’t need to be a psycho-ologist t’know that yer lying.”

“What’re you talking about?” Rainbow felt her throat clench up a bit. “I got tricked, you got tricked--Chrysalis screwed with all of us. It doesn’t make sense for me to be mad at you guys.” She tried her best to smile, but judging by the looks on their faces, her best just wasn’t good enough.

“We might have all had the wool pulled over our eyes--” Applejack admitted. “But that don’t mean you still aren’t hurting. No matter what you say, this were anything but cool.”

As if a switch had been flipped in her head, Rainbow felt a sudden surge of fury. “Of course it isn’t feathering cool!” she barked. “I was thrown in a dungeon! None of you believed in me! I almost stopped believing I was me! I’ve crashed into things that didn’t hurt as much.” She seethed, feeling only slightly better for having dished it out a bit. There was a certain satisfaction she got from seeing them wince and fidget uncomfortably … and she hated herself for it. What kind of friend enjoys seeing their friends like that? She idly touched the Element of Harmony hanging around her neck. The Princess had insisted they be worn as a way of reassuring ponies. It might have been Rainbow’s imagination, but she swore the ruby-red jewel looked a little duller than usual.

She was so distracted that she was almost knocked over when Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy suddenly rushed her and pulled her into a tight hug. Rainbow staggered, but managed to remain upright. Fluttershy buried her face in Dash’s chest, whimpering. Pinkie was crestfallen. “We’re soooo sorry Dashie! We never ever ever wanted to hurt you!”

Fluttershy looked up at her, nodding in agreement. “You’ve always been there to protect me and I’m so very very sorry that I wasn’t there when you needed protecting. I’d understand if you never wanted to see me again or didn’t want to be friends anymore...” her eyes welled up with tears.

“Whoa whoa, when did I say that?” Rainbow asked, holding her her hooves to stop her. “Of course we’re friends! I just don’t--I mean we’re--grah!” She stomped her hoof. “This bucking sucks, you know that?” She waited for her friends to nod. “And the worst part--” Rainbow deflated slightly. “The worst part? I can't even feel ticked off at you without feeling like a total mule myself.” She paused as the others looked surprised. “I mean, I spent a week thinking that at least one of you was a changeling--it took me that whole time to realize how ridiculous it all was. You guys wised up in, what, a couple of hours?" She rubbed her face. "I don't know how I can be mad at you for believing Princess Fakelestia when I totally fell for it too--only I still feel mad and dammit, I want to be mad." Rainbow swallowed, feeling a bitter taste in her mouth at the admission. "And I hate that too! You guys are awesome friends and I don't want to be mad at you--I want to be all, y'know, loyal and stuff--but I also want to be mad at you too without feeling guilty about it!"

Fluttershy let out a tiny whimper, and Rainbow immediately felt worse.

Twilight rubbed her front hooves together. "I don't want you to be upset with us--it's perfectly natural that you'd feel that way. And you're right, we all believed Chrysalis. Only I don't think it's quite the same." She risked looking Rainbow Dash in the eye, and was relieved not to see outright hatred in her eyes. "You knew Princess Celestia ever since you were a little filly. Chrysalis played on your loyalty and your close connection with her ... It was only natural for you to believe her, and to feel conflicted about who to trust in that situation." She looked over at the rest of their friends. "But we ... we didn't know Princess Celestia like you did. We only knew her through you. For us to take her word over yours ... that was wrong. And unlike you, we didn't know you were suspicious of us. So none of us had to be confronted by the rest of our friends accusing her, not believing us...and throwing us in a dungeon." Twilight's voice choked off. "I'm sorry!"

Rarity walked over, delicately draping a leg across Twilight's back. "Darling, while I think Twilight is right, and we all feel just awful about what we did … I don't think this is a situation where nopony is without fault. We didn't trust each other because we thought we were all acting ... off."

Rainbow couldn't argue that. "Yeah ... I mean, eventually I realized that none of you guys were phonys--but after Fakelestia put the idea in my head, and I saw how stressed out and weird you guys were acting … I got bent out of shape when I thought you guys were acting off." Rainbow sighed. "S'like I didn't wanna admit that maybe I didn't know you all as well as I thought I did--that there were sides of you I didn't know were there: that I didn't want to admit were there."

"I am vast, I contain multitudes." Twilight softly said.

"Gee Twilight, I didn't think you were that fat." Pinkie commented. "I mean, Applejack's the one with the huge flank..."

"What is this, pick on the farmer day?" the put-upon farmpony grumbled.

Twilight shook her head. "No no, it means ... it means there are a lot of sides to a pony. Nopony is just one thing--even if somepony act one way most of the time, that doesn't mean they'll be like that all of the time.”

Rarity offered her own opinion. "The Wedding--and maybe Chrysalis--put us in places where we were in a position to do what we love for ponies we cared about," she explained. "But the short amount of time we had to work, the pressure we were under--it was simply too much. I know for me that the idea of creating dresses for a royal wedding--and forming connections with the elite of Equestria was so tempting that..."

“That we got so darn focused on th’ task we forgot what were even here for,” Applejack finished. “Ah guess anypony can ferget themselves--or worse, her friends--when somethin' big comes up." She rubbed the back of her neck. "That ain't an excuse, now, but it's what Ah think happened.”

Twilight nodded, picking up her thread from earlier. “And when pushed, ponies can act in a way that seems--out of the ordinary for them: Pinkie Pie can be serious sometimes, and Applejack can be discreet..." she looked to Rainbow. "And you can be mad at us without being disloyal."

Applejack agreed. "Rainbow, there's aint nothing that says you cain't be mad at a friend. Even blood-boilin' furious, if it comes t'that. None of us would blame you for a second if that's how ya feel. Only," she gulped nervously. "I figur' as I was the most suspicious pole-cat outta everypony, y'all should be mad at me, and not them." She shut her eyes and winced, as if expecting to get hit.

Rainbow looked down to see her hoof twitching. She quickly forced it to stop. “I’m not gonna punch you…” she shook her head. “But how do we fix this? I mean, this was really bad. We couldn’t even use the Elements to stop the big crazy bug queen. And next time we need them, we might not have Princess Luna around to save the day.” Rainbow looked around. “How do we fix this? What do we have to say or do make this right?” She ruffled her wings, as if signaling that she wanted to fly through all this uneasy and emotional trouble the way she would a patch of turbulent weather.

Unfortunately, her answer came in the form of an awkward pause that dashed those hopes. “Feels like we should be th’ ones asking you that.” Applejack observed. “An’ if’n you don’t know … maybe there isn’t anything.” Her tone was glum.

Fluttershy shook her head. “Any problem can be fixed, but … maybe not right away.” She shuffled her hooves. “Issues between friends aren’t always worked out after a single talk. But that doesn’t mean we won’t stop working on it. And we’ll never give up on our friendship.”

Pinkie Pie nodded so ferverently Rainbow was afraid her head would go sailing clear off. “Yeah! I know just what we need!”

“A party?” Rainbow drawled.

But Pinkie surprised her by shaking her head. “Nopey-dopey! Even better! We need a vacation for some bestest-friend bonding time!”

“That does sound nice,” Fluttershy offered. “A nice, quiet, relaxing vacation.”

Rarity nodded. “Away from all of this hustle and fuss, I think.”

“The wedding was pretty stressful,” Twilight rubbed her neck. “And that was even before the invasion by evil love-sucking bugs.”

“Weddin's usually are,” Applejack paused. “Not the invasion stuff, the stressful part.”

Rainbow thought about it … and nodded. “Yeah. Guess time’s the only thing that’s gonna fix this,” she grumbled, hating things that made her wait. “If it’s gonna take time, might as well spend it doing something awesome.” A sudden commotion made her turn her head. “What’s going on?”

Applejack leaned forward, putting a hoof up to her brow. “Hmm. Looks like Cadance’s gettin’ ready t’throw the bouquet…”

“MINE!” Rarity surged forward. Feeling her competitive streak kick in, Rainbow flapped her wings and zipped above the crowd. She arrived just in time for Cadance to turn around and toss her bouquet behind her. Dash dived low and snatched the bouquet before it would land in Rarity’s hooves.

Whooping, Rainbow landed and held up her prize. “Ha! I win!” She paused as she tried thinking about what the bouquet was for. “Uh, what did I win?”

“A new dress design, fer starters.” Applejack snickered.

Cloud Kicker, spotting the excitement, trotted over with a grin on her face and a sway in her hips. “They say the mare who catches the bouquet is the one who'll get married next. So ... whaddaya say, Dash?” She waggled her eyebrows suggestively. All the color rushed out of Rainbow’s face.

“I think you would make a lovely bride, Rainbow.” Rarity sighed, her envy obvious.

“That is the tradition,” Twilight agreed. “It's really interesting how it got started, actually.”

Cloud Kicker draped a wing over Rainbow’s shoulders. “Don’t want to get hitched? I don’t blame you: who'd want to leave the swinging single lifestyle behind?”

“Nonononono--” Dash shoved the bouquet roughly at Rarity. “Take it! Take it take it take it!”

Rarity snatched it up, cradling it like it was her child. Fluttershy coughed. “Um, I don’t think it works like that…”

Still smirking at Rainbow Dash, Cloud Kicker patted her back. “So ... wanna practice for your big wedding kiss?”

Applejack had to hide her laughter behind her hat. Rainbow shoved Cloud Kicker away. “Oh hay no! You pull this after every time I save the world. If I don't stop this now, it'll become a habit. And considering how often I save the day…” she trailed off. “Well, let’s just say I don't need you trying to suck my face off every other week.”

"Can't blame a mare for trying," Cloud commented, not sounding put off by Rainbow Dash's blunt rejection.

"I think I can after the thirtieth or so time..."

Cloud shrugged nonchalantly. “Your loss.” She tilted her head. “So ... all your friends are still single, right?”

Rainbow Dash blinked owlishly. “What?”

“Just saying…” Cloud sauntered over to Rainbow’s friends, eyeing Applejack. “If you're not interested, I could always chow down on some Apples.”

The innuendo and accompany mental image made Rainbow put a hoof up to her mouth. “Oh my gosh … I'm gagging and vomiting all at the same time--I'm--I’m gavomiting!” She looked around for a nearby place in case her stomach decided to come back up.

Cloud Kicker pretended not to notice, flicking her tail against Applejack’s hindlegs before continuing on. “So Twilight,” Cloud turned to her. “Is it true that Princess Celestia can invoke jus primae noctis?”

Twilight’s face heated and she started dancing up and down on her hooves. “That’s my brother!” she wailed.

“Uh, prima what?” Rainbow asked, grateful for the distraction.

But Cloud’s toothy grin didn’t make her feel any more comfortable. “Do you want to explain, or should I?”

Still blushing, Twilight grumbled, “It’s--it’s an old never-used law that lets the ruler of a land, um, consummate any marriage.”

“Ooooh...” Pinkie Pie nodded in understanding. “That means Princess Celestia can totally sleep with Shining Armor, right? Or would that be Princess Luna?”

“Why not both?” Cloud tossed in.

“That is a good idea!” Pinkie nodded. “I‘m gonna go ask the Princesses ‘n stuff! Excuse me, be back in a flash!”

Twilight goggled. “Oh no, you are not asking the Princesses if they’re going to sleep with my big brother!” She encased Pinkie in her magical grip.

“Yeah, letting Shining sleep with other mares is what the bachelor party was for!” Cloud snickered. “I had a lot of fun crashing that. His plot has ‘property of Cadance’ stamped on it now.” She grinned, draping a wing across Twilight’s back. “But enough about them, wanna go out?”

“Wh-what? Twilight stammered, blushing madly.

Cloud nodded. “We’re both single, you’re smart and attractive, so why not—” She was cut off by Rainbow Dash’s wing, which had decided to apply itself repeatedly to Cloud Kicker’s head.

“You ... stupid .. perv!” Rainbow shouted, whapping her with her wing. “You don’t--you just don’t, okay?”

Snickering, Cloud tossed her a lazy salute. “Yeah, yeah--I know you want me all for yourself,” she winked and backed out of hitting range. “I’m gonna go make sure Derpy doesn’t demolish the muffin table. Catch you girls later!” She flew off.

“They come to me. They all come to me. How do they find me?” Rainbow wondered of nopony in particular.

“Must be yer magnetic personality,” Applejack joked, and Dash was surprised at how readily the group had fallen back into their familiar patterns.

“So where're we going on our vacation?” Pinkie Pie asked, before gasping and answering her own question. “Oooh! Oooh! I know! I heard there's this new super-huge water park opening up on Horseshoe Bay! I bet they'll have slides and tube rides and wave machines and…”

“Maybe Fillydelphia, I'd love to visit all the libraries and museums there…” Twilight chimed in.

Fluttershy chimed in. “Oh, there's this absolutely lovely nature preserve just outside Las Pegasus…”

“Why Manehatten, of course! The glamour, the sophistication…” Stars practically gleamed in Rarity’s eyes as she envisioned it.

“Y’all have never actually been, have ya?” Applejack asked. “Nah, s’gotta be Appleoosa! Nothin' says 'serenity' like leaves on the desert wind.”

Rainbow grinned. “Nah, you’re all missing out on the best place of all: the Wonderbolt Museum in Cloudsdale!”

The rest of her friends shared an identical, skeptical look. The sight made Rainbow Dash grin and crack up, the other soon joining in. The six mares continued their friendly bickering as they enjoyed the wedding reception.

From her room at the top of her tower, Princess Celestia looked down at the festivities below. While she had physically recovered from her ordeal, she was still troubled. How closely had it all come to being lost, she couldn’t help but think. Her sister, her student, all her little ponies--gone.

A voice from behind her drew her attention away. “I see you’ve chosen to stay in your room, to fret and worry about your doom.”

“Zecora,” Celestia nodded to her. “It isn’t like you stick around after all the excitement is over.”

That won a rueful grin from the zebra. “True, I suppose I rely too much on my mystique,” her gaze darkened. “But then, recent events have left me feeling somewhat bleak.”

“I feel much the same,” Celestia turned back to the view of Canterlot. “When you came to me, all those months ago with your warning--I didn’t believe you. I might even have been more short with you than I would have liked.”

Zecora shrugged her shoulders, causing her necklaces and bracelets to jangle slightly. “It is no surprise, I know. None like to hear the omens of a stormcrow.” She sighed. “Nor, truth be told, do I really care for the role.”

“Except that you were right,” Celestia observed. “Nightmare Moon, Sombra, Chrysalis … the signs are clear. Things have been escalating. At first I could anticipate them, set up preparations and contingency plans … but now they threats are coming faster and faster, each one worse than the last.” Her shoulders sagged and she lowered her head. “Now, I can barely do anything to help.”

“Your ponies are strong and true, they are capable of great things--even without you.” But Zecora’s tone betrayed her own worries. “But will that be enough for what comes next? There are challenges ahead that must be met”

Celestia nodded, straightening herself. “I cannot let my ponies face this alone. Even if it means resorting to … desperate measures.” Zecora joined her by the window, their gazes shifting away from the reception on the steps of the castle, which sprawled out into the city. They looked instead to the castle gardens … and to a lone, twisted looking mishmash statue at its center. The Princess of the Sun’s gaze dropped. “We have no choice.”

She swore she could almost hear him chuckling.

THE END

Chapter 1

Rainbow Dash shot her assembled friends a concerned look. “Do you think she’ll make it?” The six of them were sitting in a train compartment on their way to Canterlot. They were enjoying a light lunch, but the casual atmosphere came off as a bit forced.

Fluttershy put down her cup of tea and looked over to the window. “Oh my goodness, I sure hope so.”

“Come come now,” Rarity interjected, daintily bringing her napkin up to her lips. “Pinkie Pie has endured worse than this. Remember the Great Cupcake Shortage two summers ago?”

Applejack tried to repress a shudder and failed. She shook her head. “I’d be just as concerned about Twi, mahself. This can’t be easy for her neither.”

The unicorn in question was reading a book. She let out a startled squeak as she heard her name. “What? No, I’m fine! Completely fine, why would you say that I’m not?!”

“Well,” Applejack drawled. “Fer starters, yer holdin’ the book upside down. That makes it a mite harder to read, don’t ya think?”

Twilight blushed as she looked back at her book, righting it. “…I thought I was studying ancient elkish…”

“You would.” Rainbow Dash snorted. “Still, she’s doing better than Pinkie. I say she’s gonna explode. Maybe even twice.”

“If anypony could…” Applejack looked to the window, where Pinkie Pie had kept her face pressed to it for the last hour.

The energetic pony’s tail swished from side to side and her hooves tapped lightly against the window. “Come on, come on…oooh! I wish the train would just arrive already! I can’t wait another minute! What if the train got lost? What if we’re going the wrong way?”

Rainbow leaned back. “Relax Pinkie, I doubt the train managed to get lost from the track it runs on.” She rolled her eyes. “Remember how you were convinced that the only reason Derpy didn’t deliver the wedding announcement sooner was because she had gotten lost or fell into a tornado--or had caused a tornado?”

Pinkie pulled her face away from the window with schloorch-POP! that made everypony wince. “Yeah! And then you said the announcement hadn’t been mailed yet even though I’d been waiting for days and weeks and months! I said ‘What if she’s lost?’ since Derpy sometimes gets lost. Then you said it was more likely that she ran into a stiff tailwind or a house or that there was a muffin sale at Sugarcube Corner. And then I said ‘Why didn’t anypony tell me there was a muffin sale at Sugarcube Corner’ and then you--HMMPHH!”

“Thanks Applejack.” Rainbow sighed as an orange hoof inserted itself into Pinkie’s mouth. It was just easier than dealing with Pinkie herself. Plus, less Pinkie spit on her hoof.

Rarity ran a brush through her mane. “The fact is darlings, that the announcement has been made and we’ll be in Canterlot soon to help set things up.”

There was a squeal of joy as Pinkie Pie pulled her face free and cartwheeled around the room. “Yeah! And now I’m gonna throw a ‘Princess Cadance and Shining Armor Are Getting Married Party!’ at their wedding! I’ve been waiting for months and months and months!”

Rarity gave a soft demure shake of her mane. “These things do take time, dear. Months of planning goes into any wedding, and this isn’t just any wedding. Could you just imagine trying to get all the work involved for a royal wedding done in a day or two?”

“Some of the best things come t’those who wait.” Applejack agreed. “Can’t buck your apples until they’re ripe.”

Fluttershy let out a soft, but heartfelt, “That’s wonderful news. Yay. Woo-hoo.”

“Shiny’s marrying Cadance! Shiny’s marrying Cadance!” Twilight hopped around in a circle with Pinkie Pie.

Applejack chuckled. “There they go again.”

“Well, it is exciting.” Fluttershy piped up.

Rainbow flew off of set and landed in the middle of the isle. “You know it is! We’ve been preparing for weeks!” She looked around the room. “Fluttershy, how’s your bird choir?”

Fluttershy smiled beatifically. “Oh, they’ve been working so hard…they’ve even come with me to watch the Ponytones practice. Thank you for arranging that for us, Rarity.”

Rarity smiled and waved her hoof. “Tut tut, think nothing of it. We need to practice our own routine for the festivities and seeing as your delightful feathered friends—er, your other delightful feathered friends--” she shot Rainbow Dash an apologetic look before continuing, “—are performing the wedding march, it only made sense that we assist each other. Besides,” she added warmly. “You’ve been ever so helpful in making the dresses. I don’t know how else I would’ve managed creating an original wedding dress for the Princess and for all of us in time!”

With a characteristically shy smile, Fluttershy dipped her head and hid behind her mane. “It was nothing really…you did most of the work. I just did a stitch here or there.”

Twilight, having stopped her exuberant bouncing, trotted over. “I’m sure you both did wonderfully.” A delighted giggle escaped as a scroll floated over. “Oooh, we’re ahead of schedule!” She clapped her hooves together happily as she looked over to Pinkie Pie and Applejack. “Do you think you can handle the catering together?” Twilight winced and tried to rephrase. “I mean, I’m sure you two can handle it, you both bake for a living! Well technically Applejack grows and harvests a crop for a living and Pinkie throws parties, but both involve the creation of baked goods and I’m know you’re both great bakers it’s just—”

“—we want to make sure that all the food at the wedding won’t be made of just sugar and apples,” Rainbow cut in. “And Twilight? Breathe.”

“Right, breathing…got it.” Twilight gave a shaky smile.

Applejack chuckled. “Don’t you worry ‘bout it none. Pinkie and Ah reached what you might call an ‘understanding’ about what kinda foods t’make for a wedding. As for the cake…” her smile was enigmatic. “We got something special planned.”

“It’s a secret!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed. “But we can give you a hint!” She looked suspiciously around for any potential eavesdroppers or cake-surprise-revealing-spoilers before gesturing for her friends to come closer. “The cake isn’t a lie!” She hissed to them, not picking up on the five pairs of eyes rolling at her. “Oooh, I wonder if I could make the wedding reception a surprise party?”

Rainbow Dash spoke slowly. “That…would be kinda hard to pull off since everypony knows that the wedding is going to have a reception.”

“Awww…” Pinkie pouted. “Well, it’s still going to be fun, fun, fun! I’m sooo happy that I’m in charge of the reception party!”

“You’re almost as excited as Dinky was,” Rainbow noted dryly. “She was practically bouncing off the walls to be a flower filly. And the dress you made for her—” she looked to Rarity. “She really loved it. Derpy wanted me to say thanks. Again. For the tenth time.”

That won a smile out of Rarity. “Completely unnecessary. The look on Dinky’s face was more than thanks enough. She looked just darling standing there with my Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom and the others. I’m not sure if any wedding has ever had as many flower fillies as this one—or a more enthusiastic retinue.”

“Cadance loves kids.” Twilight grinned. “And they love her right back.”

“Gonna be a large wedding.” Applejack noted. “Ya got a herd of flower fillies from all over Equestria, a whole passel of bridesmaids and more guests than the farm has apple trees.”

Twilight set the scroll down on a table and started looking over the book stacks, searching for something. “Well, it’s a big event. It’s not just a wedding, it’s also meant to help reintegrate the Crystal Empire into Equestria. So Cadance is going to have ponies from all over Equestria and the Empire as her bridesmaids and flower fillies; but that makes her wedding party a bit oversized.”

“Ooooh, I get it!” Pinkie Pie bounced happily. “The Princesses want to get everypony together so they can all be friends!”

“Uh, I guess you can say that.” Twilight conceded, flipping through her book. “That’s why they decided to have the wedding at the Grand Galloping Gala, after all.”

A sudden high-pitched squeal make everypony flinch and Twilight dropped her book to look for the source. Rarity flushed as she realized everypony’s eye was upon her. “Oh, I am sorry darlings. It’s just—the Grand Galloping Gala!” She gave a happy bounce more suited to Pinkie Pie. “The crem de la crem of all Equestria will be there! High society at its highest! And for a wedding where they’ll be wearing my designs!”

“And eating my food!” Applejack chimed in. “Tell me that won’t drum up some business for the farm?”

Twilight nodded began consulting her book, “Wedding Plans for Winning Ponies.”

Rarity impatiently waved her off. “Yes, yes, both our businesses are sure to flourish…but more importantly—there’s no more romantic occasion than a wedding, especially a royal one! And I’ll be right there with the most elegant and refined ponies there are! Perhaps one of them will be so moved by the proceedings that they’ll court me!” Her eyes grew large and she danced up and down on the tips of her hooves. “Maybe even propose right then and there!”

Dash rolled her eyes. “Rarity, I’ve been to the Gala before, remember? Princess Celestia dragged me there a couple times. I mean, seeing the Wonderbolts there is cool and all, but the Gala itself is so dull that not even the awesomeness of the ‘bolts can completely offset it.”

However, Rarity’s enthusiasm wasn’t diminished. “Ah, but I would be willing to bet that back then you weren’t a savior of Equestria and the stand-out at the Best Young Flyer competition, were you?” She grinned as she spotted the perk of interest in Rainbow’s eyes. “I’m sure that this Gala the Wonderbolts will all be competing for a chance to spend time with you.”

“Well, now that you mention it…” Rainbow smirked.

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Now see what you gone and done? S’no way we’re gonna get her head out the train doors now.” She snorted as Dash stuck her tongue out at her. “And I need that space t’bring my food cart.”

“A food cart?” Rainbow looked at the farmpony as if spying some rare creature she had never seen before. “You’re planning to bring a food cart to the fanciest, snootiest and most high-brow event in all of Equestria—and to a wedding, no less?”

“You say that like it’s weird or somethin’.”

“It would be nice if the birds and I got the chance to see the Royal Canterlot Gardens…” Fluttershy piped up. “To make friends with all those wonderful and rare animals…”

Twilight looked up from her book and smiled. “Well, I’m glad you’ll get to enjoy yourself.” She shot an apologetic look at Rainbow Dash. “I’m sorry that—”

“Twiliiight.” Rainbow groaned and rolled her eyes. “For the millionth time, it’s cool. For pony’s sake, you’re Shining Armor’s sister. It just makes sense that you’d be his best mare.”

“I know…it’s just that, I’m also in charge of planning the wedding and being Shining’s best mare. I feel like I’m crowding you out…”

The blue pegasus facehooved. “Twilight, we talked about this. I’m doing a Sonic Rainboom as they get married…that’s hardly being crowded out.”

Applejack nodded. “Eyup. Sounds more like she’s planning t’steal the show from the bride and groom. So, yeah, typical Rainbow.”

Rainbow ignored her. “Besides, Cadance offered me something in compensation. Something besides performing a Sonic Rainboom.”

“She did?” Twilight blinked and consulted her checklist. “I don’t see anything on my wedding checklist…”

“I never said it was for the wedding itself,” Rainbow Dash rubbed her hooves together and cackled evilly. “I’m in charge of the bachelorette party!”

Somewhere back in Ponyville, Cloud Kicker’s ears and wings suddenly perked up and she had no idea why…only that something good was going to occur.

“O-oh my…” Fluttershy meeped, blushing incandescently.

Pinkie gasped. “Oh wow! I’ve never been to a bachelorette party before! And you get to plan it? You’re sooo lucky! Can I come? I can help!”

“Of course you can! Fact is ... You're all coming!" Her grin showed more teeth than a pack of timberwolves. That smile had spelled doom and ruin for many a guard before the water balloon hit.

Applejack gulped. “Whoo boy…”

The train lurched and began to slow down, indicating that they were near. “We better get our things together.” Twilight observed as she closed her book.

“Quite right.” Rarity trotted out of the train car. From the hallway the others heard her say, “Excuse me, would you gentleponies be willing to help a lady with her belongings?”

Everypony was waiting eagerly as the train pulled into a stop at the Canterlot station. As soon as the doors opened, six very excited mares were the first ponies off. No points for guessing which of the six was first. “First!” Rainbow Dash called as she landed.

Applejack who had arrived on the platform a split-second after Rainbow, just rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah…” She took a look around. “Whooeee…so this is Canterlot?”

“Yup, Canterlot.” Rainbow nodded.

“Canterlot.” Twilight sighed happily. As much as she loved Ponyville, it was good to be back in her hometown.

Before Pinkie Pie could say something about it only being a model—which nopony else would’ve gotten—Rarity made her presence known through the pain-filled groans of the porters helping with her luggage.

“Land sakes, Rarity!” Applejack whistled at the pile of luggage that loomed over them. “Sure you packed enough?”

Rarity tilted her head back and sniffed. “A lady must be prepared for anything. And at least I didn’t need to be reminded to pack a toothbrush.”

Applejack sputtered indignantly. “Hey now! I was gonna remember! I was just busy with makin’ sure Apple Bloom minded her chores.”

“Of course, darling.” Rarity nodded sympathetically. “I’m sure the dear needed reminding of how to do the chores she’s been doing since she was old enough to help around the farm.”

“Exactly.” Applejack nodded before the words sank in. “Wait, what?”

Fluttershy forestalled any further argument when she noticed the arrival of armored guards. “Oh my…”

The others all looked over to see a contingent of guards marching over. They were a mix of earth ponies, unicorns and pegasi. Some of them shimmered and were soon recognized as crystal ponies. They realized that only one pony would have crystal ponies in her guard…

“Cadance!” Twilight dashed over, missing the stiffened postures of the guards.

Fortunately, Princess Mi Amore di Cadenza stepped out from behind her guards with a wide smile on her face. “Twilight!” Then with any semblance of royal dignity forgotten, the two fell into their fillyhood chant. “Sunshine, Sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake!”

It was all Rainbow could do not to burst out laughing at the looks on the guards’ faces. They were clearly trying to maintain their stoic guard face, but she’d been around guards long enough to know when they were clinging to their composure by the slimmest of margins. Of course, if Twilight had come up and started shaking her rump in Rainbow’s face, she’d have a hard time not laughing too. Good thing they never did that routine around Cloud Kicker, Dash mused to herself.

Rainbow’s own face lit up as she spotted another figure stepping out from behind the guards. “Hey Shiney Hiney!” The guards’ composure did crack as one of them let out a snort of laughter. Luckily for the guard in question, he managed to resume his normal posture before Shining Armor managed to spot which one had laughed.

With a sigh and a shake of his head, he trotted up to Rainbow. “Hey Dashie.” He grinned before putting her in a headlock and noogieing her. “I’llShiney Hiney you!”

The surprised Dash let out a startled squawk as she fought back, whapping him with her wings. “Hey!” she squealed. “Oh you are so gonna get it!”

“Princess!” Rarity dipped her head into an elegant bow, quickly followed by the others—save Rainbow. “It’s so delightful to see you again!”

Pinkie bounced up and down. “We’re sooo happy for you! I’m gonna throw you the best party ever! There’ll be cake and balloons and music and piñatas—ooh! Wait, you’re the crystal princess! We can have crystal piñatas!” Everypony winced. Even Pinkie seemed to catch on that there was something was amiss. “Wait…that’s probably not a good idea, is it?”

“No.” Applejack rolled her eyes and gently whapped Pinkie with her hat. After doffing her hat again, she turned to the prospective royal couple. “Crystal piñatas aside, we’re mighty honored that y’all asked us to be bridesmaids and to cater the wedding.”

“Pleased as punch!” Rarity chimed in. “The chance to design wedding dresses for a Canterlot wedding--!” A squee escaped her lips and her hooves danced up and down excitedly.

Cadance smiled. “Shining Armor and I are the ones who should be grateful. We’re just lucky to have you all as friends.” She wrapped a hoof around Twilight and embraced her. “You’re practically family.” She turned to Shining Armor. “Right, Shining?”

Shining Armor paused mid-noogie and looked over, giving Rainbow a chance to break free. “Hm? Oh definitely!” He smiled and quickly moved over to Cadance. “We’re really happy that you’re here to help with the wedding.”

With an eyeroll and a deadpan expression, Cadance nudged Shining in the side. “He just means that he’s happy that he doesn’t have to deal with it.”

“Exactly.” Shining nodded solemnly, not about to be out-deadpanned.

“So useless.” But Cadance didn’t maintain her deadpan tone for long as she soon snapped back into a near-Pinkie level of excitement. “So how are the kids? Are they all going to make it?” She let out a squeak of excitement.

“Cadance is a little foal crazy.” Shining told the girls with a wry grin. “You just wait until she sees all the fillies in their little flower girl dresses and—” Cadance squealed in glee. “—that happens.” He rubbed his ear with a hoof.

"So Cadence, how many youngins are you fixin to have?" Applejack smirked.

“A good question.” Cadance turned her fiance. Shining swallowed nervously, his face alternating between blushing and paling as his soon-to-be wife flashed him an almost predatory grin.

He was saved by a sigh from Fluttershy. “Oh my goodness, I know just how she feels.” She let out a tiny squee of her own. “Dinky and all her little friends are so adorable. They’re just as cute as my animal friends.” She indicated her mane where her bird choir had perched inside.

“Ugh…tasting cute in the back of my mouth.” Shining Armor winced. “Must do…something…stallion-y.”

“Translation: he wants to go play Ogres and Oubliettes with his geek pals.” Rainbow stage whispered to her friends, prompting a group snort. After fixing her mane—or at least getting back to the way it was before Shining Armor noogied her—she shot Cadance a grin. “So, are you looking forward to the Best. Wedding. Ever?”

“We sure are,” Cadance gave Rainbow a hug. “We know everything’s going to be simply wonderful.”

“Like the bachelorette party?” The rainbow maned fiend grinned up at her. Cadance gave a weak chuckle that soon trailed off into a nervous, forced smile that seemed to say, ‘I instantly regret this decision.’

She was saved by the appearance of more guards, heralding the arrival of--“Princess Celestia!” Shining Armor saluted sharply.

As her friends began to bow, Rainbow dashed over to embrace the Princess. “Celestia!”

Celestia wrapped her wings around her pupil and held her close. “Rainbow Dash. It is so good to see you and your friends again. And under a more joyous occasion than usual.”

“Yeah.” Rainbow rested her head against the Princess’ neck. “Ponyville is awesome and my friends are even more awesome--but I still missed seeing you, y’know?”

“I understand.” Celestia nuzzled her. “We must spend some time catching up. As much as I enjoy your letters about your friendship discoveries, I must admit they’re sometimes a touch … brief.” Before Rainbow Dash could object, Celestia quoted one of her letters from memory. “Dear Princess Celestia: Dragon showed up. I kicked it in the face! It was awesome. Then Fluttershy made him cry and run away, 'cause she's awesome too.”

What else was there to say, Rainbow thought to herself. Seeing the pout on Dash’s face, Celestia chuckled. “There’s plenty of time to catch up later. Your friends must be tired from your long trip and want to settle into your rooms.”

The cyan pegasus looked over and saw what Celestia said was true. They were a touch bedraggled and excited, clearly wanting to drop their stuff off and launch into their preparations for the wedding. Having been cooped up on the train for over an hour--and not having all that much to do to prepare for the wedding--Rainbow flexed her wings. “Hey guys, I’m gonna catch up with you later. I want to stretch my wings and see the old ‘hood. See you at the palace in a bit!”

“Sounds good.” Twilight worked out a crick in her neck. “How about we all meet for dinner?”

Applejack nodded. “Sounds like a plan. I wanna see what kind of apples they got in their fancy kitchens for me to work with.” The others all chimed in about the various places and work they were going to do for the wedding.

“Cool,” Rainbow agreed. “See you guys in a bit. You too Cadey, Shiney-Hiney.”

“Have fun Rainbow.” Cadance waved.

“And try not to harass any guards,” Shining chimed in as Rainbow flew off.

“Who needs to do that when I have you around?” She called back as she headed out of sight. A smile crossed her lips as the wind flew in her face. The sights and the familiar currents all came rushing back to her like old friends. Rainbow darted around a tall building and around buzzed between two spires. She did a barrell roll and waved down at the ponies below her, not even minding if they didn’t spot her. It was just an awesome sort of day that put her in an awesome sort of mood.

It wasn’t until her stomach began growling that she noticed the shadows were growing long. Looking at the position of the sun, she saw it was late afternoon. Better start heading back, she resolved. As Rainbow Dash was flying through the largely empty airship port, she spotted a lone figure in a tattered brown cloak being pursued by several guards.

“This looks like a job for--me!” Rainbow zoomed downward. She was easily able to outstrip the guards and bear down on the suspect. The fugitive ducked into a narrow alleyway, but that didn’t stop Rainbow. “Gotcha!” She exclaimed as she tackled the figure into a pile of refuse. “I have you now--Zecora?!” She yelped as the cloak’s hood fell back, revealing the familiar striped face. “What are you doing here?”

“It would appear that I’m being shoved into some trash by my good friend, Rainbow Dash.” Zecora panted.

It was then that Rainbow noticed that her normally neat mohawk was disheveled, her face was bruised and she was covered with a host of smaller injuries. The zebra’s usual calm, serene poise replaced by a general sense of weariness. “What happened?” Dash looked back at the guards approaching them. “What’s going on?”

“Ma’am, step away from the suspect.” The lead guard ordered as his soldiers approached in a semicircle, cutting off any avenue of escape. “That zebra is wanted for questioning. She’s considered armed and dangerous.”

Rainbow Dash’s jaw dropped. “What?! You gotta be joking! This is Zecora, she’s helped save Equestria twice!”

“That number is actually a touch low, limited by how little you know,” Zecora added. “But heed me, things are not what they seem.”

“Enough.” The guard captain stomped his hoof. “Step aside, please. She’s responsible for several attacks on guards throughout Canterlot--we believe she’s working for a hostile power.”

Rainbow looked from Zecora to the guards and back again. “Look, maybe I can straighten this all out. I can have Shiney or the Princess get you out no sweat.”

Zecora frowned and twirled her staff, which she had strapped to her side. “Twisted tongues lie freely, but do not believe all you hear--but what you will see!” With that she began to chant. “Tor lorek san, bor nakka mur. Natromo faan tornek wot ur. Ter lantern ker lo abin sur. Taan lek lek nok -- Formorrow sur!” She slammed her staff down on the ground and a wave of white magic energy flowed over the guards like a tidal wave.

Rainbow watched it move over them, tugging and pulling at the guard’s faces until they began to peel back. She shouted for Zecora to stop, thinking that she was going to hurt them … but she stopped when saw the lead guard’s face pulled back on one side. On his left, his face looked like a normal pony guard, white coat, blue eye. But the other side--his face was black and shiny, devoid of any fur or hair and his eye was bright green, pupiless and cruel.

Zecora’s magic soon faded and the guard’s face returned to normal, his eye being the last thing to change back. “Clever.” A nasty smirk crossed the guard’s face. It was that as much as what she just witnessed that convinced Rainbow Dash that these were not guardponies she was dealing with.

“You convinced me, Zecora.” Dash tensed, scraping her hoof against the ground challengingly. “These guys are fakes!”

“Get them!” Ordered the lead guard.

The others charged in and soon, Zecora and Rainbow Dash were fighting back to back. Rainbow slugged one of the fake guards in the muzzle, using her wings to help give her the lift for a mid-air buck to take out another one sneaking up behind her.

Rainbow Dash had to shout over the din to make herself heard. “So what’s going on Z?”

Zecora grunted as she used her staff to bat another attacker away. “They sought to remove me from play, so that their scheme could win them the day! I sought to flee, to find a friendly face--I did not expect one to knock me into place.”

“I said I was sorry!” Rainbow snapped, forgetting that she actually hadn’t just yet. “But who--what--are they?”

“Stealers of names, wearers of false faces.” Zecora spat, sounding winded as she continued to fight. “They are parasites and lurkers in dark places. Where they hail, no hope can ring--beware them, for they are the changelings.”

Rainbow grunted as one of them hit her in the side. She retaliated with an uppercut that laid him our flat. “Let me guess, they want to take over Equestria?”

“Of course!” Zecora noded. “But they will not use open, blunt force. They take the forms of those for whom you care. When your guard is lowered, they will be there.”

Dash winced. Terrific. Why couldn’t they be like every other world conqueror and just appear with corny villain speeches? Her ears perked as she heard the sounds of voices coming near. Another group of guards emerged … and promptly joined those attacking Rainbow and Zecora. What was worse, Rainbow didn’t know if they were more of these changelings or regular guards who saw two ponies attacking their fellow and naturally went in to help their comrades. She didn’t think they were real guards, since at least one of them would naturally recognize her as the Princess’ student … she wasn’t that hard to pick out of a crowd. But it did make Rainbow realize just how feathering annoying it would be fighting an opponent she couldn’t see.

She looked over to ask Zecora if she had some more magic mojo to help strip away the changelings’ disguise when she saw just how bruised and battered she was. They must’ve really done a number on the zebra before she got away. As much as she really hated running away from a fight, Dash knew Zecora couldn’t last much longer and the odds against them were only going to get worse. Rainbow nudged her. “Come on, we gotta get you out of here.”

“I would like nothing better,” Zecora heaved, leaning against her staff for support as their opponents regrouped. “I do not think that can be done, however.” She pointed a striped leg to more guards arriving at both ends of the alley, and pegasus guards over head. “It is important that you remain at large, to carry this warning to those in charge: This is not a dream, things are not what they seem. An enemy is coming you should fear. Neigh, not coming, they are already here.”

Rainbow snorted. “I’m not just leaving you here!” She looked around, her face falling as she realized that there was no way for her to pick Zecora up and outrun all those fresh guards from a cold start. Worse, the alley was so tight that she didn’t think she could maneuver while carrying Zecora...at least, not without running the risk of turning them both into a red stain on the wall.

The zebra had already come to this conclusion for herself. “I fear this is where our ways part. I consider you a true and noble friend. I will carry our times together in my heart--until my end.”

“Oh no way!” Rainbow’s stubbornness was in full swing. “There is no way I am leaving you here to--”

“I am sorry,” Zecora’s shoulders sagged tiredly. “But is goodbye.” She muttered and Rainbow felt a tingle run over her body. Her body was surrounded by a bubble of energy. Zecora wound up her staff and struck it, sending it hurtling away.

Dash pounded angrily at the walls of her prison and shouted, but she could only watch as Zecora was piled upon by a wall of changeling-guards. She couldn’t see what happened next as everything got smaller and smaller as she was sent careening away. But she didn’t see Zecora emerge from her attackers.

The magic holding Rainbow finally released her halfway across Canterlot. She sped back to the site of the battle but it was too late. Zecora and the changelings were long gone, with nothing left to give any clue of where they had gone--or that they were ever there to begin with. After spending several agonizing minutes flying around and finding nothing, Rainbow Dash gave up with a frustrated snarl. Zecora was gone and she hadn’t been able to save her.

Remembering Zecora’s final words, she realized there was only one way to save Equestria and Zecora. She sped back to the palace, stopping for nothing and nopony. She had to find Princess Celestia and warn her of the danger.

The changelings were coming.

Being the Princess’ student meant that nopony tried to stop her as she flew into the palace--having her trademark rainbow contrail made identifying her a snap. It was just as well. Right now, Rainbow Dash didn’t know who to trust and after what she had just been through, she’d be more than a little inclined to punch first and apologize later than risk being ambushed by another changeling masquerading as a guardpony.

She landed on Princess Celestia’s balcony. Since it was her room, she was alone. Celestia blinked but before she could even ask what was wrong, Rainbow had already launched into a breathless explanation of what had happened and what Zecora had told her.

Celestia’s eyes widened and when Dash was finished, she sagged. “I was afraid of this…” She trotted back into her room, Rainbow following her.

“What? You knew about this?” she demanded.

“I had begun to hear reports.” Celestia sighed as she looked around, closing the doors and windows and closing the blinds. “Now that the changelings are confirmed to be in Canterlot, that means that one of my worst fears has been realized.”

Rainbow Dash felt her wings twitch. If Celestia was worried. “What is it? Do you know what they’re planning?”

Celestia nodded, sitting down. “If they are here, then that means they’ve already taken steps to neutralize the greatest threat to their invasion: the Elements of Harmony.” She took a deep breath and looked Rainbow squarely in the eye. “I’m afraid that one of your friends has been replaced by a changeling.”

Chapter 7

Now completely on edge after her run in the with the guards, Rainbow Dash tried to calm down with a flight around the palace as she plotted her next move. I need to establish a prime suspect and find confirmation. She blinked at her choice of words. Huh. I guess Celestia making me read Sherlock Hooves wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

She had just swerved round one of the castle’s many towers when Dash heard an anguished scream. That’s Rarity! “Hold on Rarity, I’m coming!” She angled herself around and flew towards the balcony window. It was closed but that wasn’t a problem for her. She had an all-purpose key.

CRASH!

Luckily, the windows in the castle were reinforced—something that was done after a speedy flyby from Rainbow Dash shattered them one time—so the windows were flung inwards instead of shattering into a thousand tiny, sharp pieces. Always a plus.

Having been unfortunately familiar with the procedure of a crash, Rainbow tucked and rolled until she came to a stop, springing to her hooves. She looked around for any sign of bad guys. “All right, I’m here! What’s the problem?”

“THAT!” Rarity shrieked, pointing behind Rainbow Dash. Without a moment’s hesitation, Rainbow turned around and pounced on a…ponyquin in a half-completed dress?

“The hay? What is this?” Dash demanded.

Rarity dramatically threw a hoof across her face. “That’s exactly what I’m trying to figure out.” She shuddered. “The design started out as Prench haute couture but then I tried incorporating a Canterlot trend that relied too much on some sheer silk because that's what all the best ponies have been wearing lately, and now it’s just an awful mess!”

A martyred groan escaped Rainbow as she facehoofed. “Seriously? That’s what all the screaming was about?”

An indignant huff greeted her question. “Really now, Rainbow Dash. How would you feel if everypony said your designs were closer to prêt-à-porter than proper high fashion?” The vacant stare on Rainbow’s face spoke volumes. “Oh, all right then; how about if somepony said your Sonic Rainboom was nothing more than cheap circus trick?”

“Well, that’s dumb.” Rainbow shrugged in an off-hoofed way.

Rarity regarded her with growing anger, her face flushing red. “Dumb?” Her voice sounded strained, trying to sound casual. In the next instant she completely abandoned any semblance of casualness as she began to shriek. “DUMB?! How can you be so insensitive?!”

“Whoa, easy Rarity!” Rainbow held up her hooves. “I meant calling my Rainboom a circus trick would be dumb! Settle back, Rares!”

Rarity, having gone from calm to shrieking in ten seconds flat, proved just as fast in going the other way. She put a hoof to her forehead and wailed dramatically. “Oh Rainbow Dash, this is simply awful! I don't know what to do or how I could possibly fix this disaster!”

“What, you mean the dresses and stuff?” Dash took a quick look around. The room was full of ponyquins with dresses and a few suits in various stages of completion. Half-finished sketches practically coated the floor. “What’s the problem?”

“The problem, dear Rainbow, is that I have to design and make a host of dresses for Cadance, for her bridesmaids—that would be us, in case you forgot—and her flower fillies.” Rarity looked at her critically. “That means, before you ask, that I have to make sure each dress not only suitably matches the wearer, not clashing with their coat or mane color, but also does not clash with the other dresses. They need to make each pony look wonderful while not having the party as a whole become a cluttered mess.” She rubbed her face wearily. “And since the Gala Wedding is such an event, I have orders coming in from some of the most well-known and well-regarded ponies in Canterlot.”

Rainbow tilted her head and whistled. “Guess that means you’ve been pretty busy, huh?”

Rarity bristled, puffing and bristling like her evil cat. “Pretty busy? I have been working my hooves to the bone! I’m practically drowning in requests and simply don’t have the time to do them all!”

“Well, aren’t you just supposed to do the wedding dresses and stuff? I mean, it sucks, but if you can’t do all the requests for the elites and snobs or whatever, then no big deal.”

“No big deal?! These are the crème de la crème of Canterlot society!” Rarity goggled at Rainbow, pacing up and down in front of her. “If I pass on these orders I’d offend them and miss my chance to become one of them! My business will never grow! I-I might lose my home! My dreams! I won’t be able to get enough business to not be left starving on the streets! No I could end up homeless or worse—move back in with my parents!”

Dash felt her eyes widen. “Whoa, Rarity, calm down!”

“How can I be calm when I'm one single mistake on one of dozens of dresses away from being kicked out of my home, eating scavenged garbage and—” Rarity’s voice rose a couple of octaves “—living in a cart down by the river!” Her eyes widened, the corners of her eyes twitching. “Can you just imagine the state my mane would be in? There would be dirt and twigs everywhere! I would be a hideous monster!”

“Rarity!” Rainbow grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. “Snap out of it!”

Having stopped her tirade, the white unicorn immediately fell about bawling into Rainbow’s shoulder. “Oh Rainbow Da-a-a-ash!” She wailed. “I don’t know what to do! There’s no way I can get all the dresses done on time!”

Rainbow started to awkwardly pat Rarity’s back. “Er, what about Fluttershy? Isn’t she helping?”

Rarity sniffled, “Oooh, I’ve scarcely seen her. Too busy with all her little animal friends, I’m sure…How could she abandon me in my hour of need?”

Rainbow narrowed her eyes slightly. “That wasn’t very … generous.”

“I’m the one who could use a little generosity right now!” Rarity cried as she pulled herself away, frantically looking from design to design. “Rainbow Dash, you lived in Canterlot! You know some of the Elite! You simply must tell me what they like!”

“Er, well they like things that are…fancy. So just make all your dresses fancier.” She looked around. “I think they need to be about twenty percent fancier.”

A strangled little noise rose in the back of Rarity’s throat. “Could you be a little more specific…please? What do you think of this one?” She pulled up a long strapless dress. The floor length cloth looked very fine and its sheen looked so bright, Rainbow could bet a tailor begged Celestia for a few strands of hair (and might have won). “You would not believe the bolts I was given by the princess. And a gem brooch on a gentle pleated side for a hint of fabulosity.”

Rainbow looked it over. She tilted her head to one side and walked around it for a better view. Of course, it might have helped if she knew what she was looking for. Rainbow scratched her muzzle as Rarity waited anxiously, sweat beading at her brow. “Looks okay,” Rainbow announced finally. “Very bright.”

“‘Bright’? ‘Okay’?” Rarity repeated. “That’s it?”

“Well,” Rainbow fished for something more to say. “Maybe you could make something like ...like...”

Rarity’s teeth began to grind together. “Yeees?”

“Like—oh! How about some wicked battle armor? Or a dress that's like battle armor!”
Dash blurted out. “The snobs know the guards are important, so maybe dressing like them will make them feel important, right?” She looked back to see Rarity’s jaw had dropped open.

“I—I … wha?” She was speechless. Probably from too much awesomeness, Rainbow decided. And hey, It’s good to remind ponies that I’m full of great ideas. I’m not just the single best flyer in Equestria, after all.

“I know! Isn't it a totally awesome idea?” Dash grinned. “They’ll totally look great at the wedding rehearsal.”

Rarity’s eye twitched again. “Wedding…rehearsal? They’re needed by then?”

Rainbow nodded. “Well, yeah, didn’t anypony tell you? They’re gonna have the rehearsal two days before the wedding itself, in full dress and everything. Make sure the band plays right, make sure the guards are…guarding or whatever. So the dresses have to be done in, what, five days?”

She started to feel worried by Rarity’s long silence. The other pony stood frozen still, almost as if she’d seen a cockatrice, were it not for the periodic twitching of her eye. “Rainbow? Be a dear, and pick up a few gallons of ice cream from the kitchen for me, would you?” Her voice was calm. Too calm.

Rainbow swallowed nervously. This wasn’t gonna end well. At the same time, she didn’t want to set foot in the kitchen until Ramsay and Applejack had things sorted out. If they ever did. “Uh .... I really don't wanna go to the kitchens right now.”

Rarity’s eye twitch started becoming more frequent. “Well, excuse me for asking for a bit of stress relief. After all, I just found I won't be getting much sleep for the next several days…” She whirled around and violently ripped a mostly completed dress from a ponyquin. “But it’s not like it really matters! Nooo, because as soon as I’m done, somepony will show up to tell me how they hate it! ‘No Rarity, we want something with more ruffles. No, that’s too much ruffles, put in some more lace!’” She dragged another dress over to Rainbow Dash, practically shoving it in her face. “Tell me what you think of this dress! It was custom designed by Lady High Brow!”

Rainbow took a half step back from the outfit, which was marked by zigzagging orange and green stripes. “What? I’m no expert—”

Rarity pressed in on her. “Tell me.”

“It’s fine, Rarity--”

“Tell me, tell me tell me tell me-Tell me!”

“Ugh, okay okay! Give me a second.” Rainbow eyed the dress the first thing that came to her mind was, It looks like you peeled it off a dead clown. But deciding she couldn’t say that to Rarity, what she ended up saying was, “I like it!”

“You hesitated.” Rarity narrowed her eyes.

“Wha? Well--I was--uh, thinking for the right words! Because it's sophisticated, so it needs sophisticated words.” That sounded better in Rainbow’s head.

Rarity stamped her hoof. “Ooh you’re just saying that! You think its hideous!” She began to dramatically wail and sob again.

“What?!” A flabbergasted Rainbow Dash shook her head. “I never said that!”

“You didn’t have to!” Rarity shook the dress in front of her. “Just look at this monstrosity! It's not fit to be a dishrag!” She tore it lengthwise.

The senseless destruction of fashion by the high queen of all things fashion confused and scared the hay out of Dash. “Come on, it just needs a little work...I mean, I could even help out if you want.”

In another sudden mood shift, Rarity sighed and swooned against Rainbow Dash. “Oh, thank you so much, darling. I simply don't know what I would do without you.”

Dealing with Rarity was like trying to talk down a lightning cloud sometimes... “Sure thing! So uh...where's the tape?”

There was a long pause. “Tape?”

Rainbow nodded. “Yeah. You know, to put the different pieces of dress together! Or do you use glue? Not my first choice, but you’re the fashionista.”

There was another, even longer pause. Dash wondered what was up with that. “You don't know how to sew?” Rarity said weakly.

“Well, no.” Rainbow admitted. “But I figure it can't be that hard, right?” She looked around, spotting a closed door on the other side of the room. “Is the stuff we need in there?” Before she could take more than a few steps forward, Rarity--in an admittedly impressive display of speed--had thrown herself between Dash and the door.

“No!” Her eyes bulged slightly. “You can’t go in there! You mustn’t!”

Rainbow tried tilting her head so she could love around the panicked unicorn. “Aw, c’mon Rarity, what’s the big deal? You got a secret boyfriend stashed away in there?”

Rarity harumphed and looked Rainbow squarely in the eye. “Do. Not. Go in. That. Room. Are we clear?”

As much as Rainbow hated to admit it, Rarity could be pretty intimidating when she put her mind to it. And the way her eye was twitching warned the normally brash pegasus not to press her look. “Clear...so, uh, how about I just go on some errands instead?”

“I think that would be best.” Rarity nodded primly as she levitated over a list long enough to rival one of Twilight’s checklists. “Now, I realize you’re busy with your own preparations and making sure everypony is on task. So I won’t ask you to get every item on this list.” She added, seeing Rainbow’s jaw drop. “If you could just fetch me a few items, I would be ever so appreciative.”

“Uh, sure. No...problem?” Rainbow tilted her head at some of the items on the list. She didn’t even recognize three-quarters of them. “Where do I find these?”

“Well, there's Salon de Fabrique, Le Mare Couture, Bonne Fashione…” Rarity pulled out a map and made tiny marks at various locations all over the city. Even with Rainbow’s speed, it would take all day to go in and out of all these shops, plus hauling around whatever it was she was getting for Rarity.

Still...Rainbow thought Rarity looked pretty stressed. “Okay, I got it. Be back in a flash!” Grabbing the list and the map, she dove backwards out of the tower. She spread her wings and with a wild whoop, righted herself and headed for the first location. Easy peasy. I’ll grab whatever couple of things Rarity needs and be on my way.

She spotted a fancy-looking store with large display windows and a name written in curvy letters that she couldn’t read. Gotta be the right place. Rainbow headed inside and looked around. “Um, hello? I need a little help here.”

“Com-iiing!” A unicorn in a fancy dress trotted out, all smiles--until she noticed Rainbow Dash and her lack of attire. “Yes? May I...help you?”

Rainbow nodded. “Yeah, I need to buy some stuff.”

“Stuff.” The unicorn’s smile faded another fraction. “Might I suggest you try the local Bit store?”

“I need fashion stuff,” Dash rolled her eyes before consulting her list. “For the wedding? Like--camel souls?” I really hope Rarity isn’t getting into dark magic...

The shop pony was equally nonplussed. “I take it you meant camisoles?”

“Uh, sure. Isn’t that what I said?”

“No.” The unicorn rubbed her face wearily. “Will that be all?”

Dash checked the list. “Uh, I need some taffy-tea…”

“Taffeta?” The shop pony corrected with a sniff.

Rainbow wondered if she had a cold. “Yeah and--so wrong?”

“That’s sarong.” The clerk sighed, preparing herself for a long ordeal. On that at least, she and Rainbow Dash were agreed.

Three stores and several hours later, Rainbow flew back to the tower, laden with all manner of sewing supplies and rolls of fabric. I’ve known thunderclouds that were less disagreeable...she thought bitterly to herself. Still, if it took some pressure off Rarity, it’d be worth it. Especially when she’d land and Rarity would thank her by saying….

“Oh blast, I needed one more bolt of lace. Rainbow, would you be a dear…?” Rarity called as she gathered up the supplies with her magic, getting back to work without another moment’s thought.

Dash sighed. Well, I guess I can do one more tiny errand before I go on my way...

After returning with a bolt of fabric as thick as a hundred year-old oak tree, Rainbow Dash prepared to fly off when Rarity chimed, "One more thing…”

Rainbow grumbled as she flew back from the same store for the third time. How am I supposed to know that ribbon was crimson and not red? Or cinnamon? Or cherry? For pony’s sake--they’re all featherin’ RED!

And seriously, she asks for ‘ripe plum fabric?' Not 'pinkish red' or 'purple' or even 'plum,' but 'ripe plum'? Next time I'll get the whole bunch of 'em and let her make a fruit salad dress.

She had barely set her hooves down on the tower balcony than Rarity’s voice rang out with, “one more thing...”

As soon as Rainbow Dash returned this time, she was immediately set out again with the promise that it was just “one more thing”

And again.

“Just one…”

And again.

“...more…”

And again.

“...thing.”

Rainbow grumbled as she flew back to the tower for the seventh time. If she heard the phrase “just one more thing” one more time…

A scowl set on Rainbow’s face as she thought about how Rarity could’ve just given the list to some guard or palace aide, maybe split it up a bit, and she could’ve had everything she needed without wasting her valuable time. It’s not like anypony else has anything as important to do as me, what with trying to stop a freakin’ changeling invasion!

That thought planted fresh seeds of doubt in Rainbow’s mind. Maybe that’s just what ‘Rarity’ wants…for me to be too busy running around to do anything about the changelings.
The more she thought about it, the more it made sense. Rarity’s secrecy around what was behind that door, her bizarre mood shifts, her downright obsession with getting in with the Canterlot elite…If a changeling spy got in with the elites that’d give them a whole lot of powerful, influential ponies they could replace. They’ve done it before.

Rainbow Dash hovered outside the window, peeking in. Rarity was darting from workstation to workstation, making a stitch here, adjusting a hem there. She stopped for a moment to wipe her brow … just as somepony knocked at the door. Rainbow’s eyes narrowed as she saw who Rarity let in: Jet Set and Upper Crust. They were a living caricature of all the worst aspects of Canterlot culture: stuck up, spoiled, haughty, obnoxious, condescending and all around pains in the flank. Hay, Dash would even rate them as slightly worse than Blueblood—at least he was a prince and thus had a reason (a lame one) to think he was better than everypony else. Those two didn’t even have that. If I described them to anypony who hadn’t met them, they’d think I was making up a stereotype. That’s all they really are though.

While Rainbow eventually came to conclude that some high-class ponies like Fancy Pants were actually pretty cool, Jet Set and Upper Crust would need to be encased in ice for a week before they ever even got close.

The worst part? They were the aunt and uncle of Tiffany, a particularly spoiled brat who Rainbow had given some dental reconstruction to—courtesy of her hoof.

She pushed those memories aside as she watched and listened in on them. “…this is the dress I designed for you, dear Upper Crust. As you requested I drew inspiration from Hoity Toity’s spring line of formal wear, but did so in a way that emphasizes your…unique attributes.”

Like drawing attention away her fat flank, Rainbow translated.

Upper Crust hmmed and examined the dress. “Well, it’s an improvement over your earlier design,” she drawled. “Not that it was difficult to do so, however.” She frowned. “No no no, I want the trim to be in orange. Orange is Princess Cadance’s favorite color, and I want to make a good impression. The same goes for Jet Set’s suit.”

Rainbow Dash--who knew Cadance a heck of a lot better than Upper Crust--didn’t think Cadance’s favorite color was orange. And more to the point, even if it was, she wasn’t suddenly going to like an obvious snob like Jet Set or Upper Crust just because they wore it.

Dash didn’t know much about fashion: she almost never wore clothes when she didn’t have to, didn’t know the difference between red, cherry and cinnamon, and certainly didn’t get why black was the new black. But even she could tell that the dress Upper Crust was having Rarity design was pretty awful.

She waited for Rarity to tell them why that design would be a crime against all things fashionable. This ought to be good…

“...That’s a most delightful idea!” Rarity walked over to Upper Crust, smiling widely. “Orange it is.”

Rainbow blinked, hastily rubbed a hoof in her ear before listening in again. I couldn’t have just heard that. That dress looks like something Opal dragged in through her litterbox. That was when she noticed Rarity’s smile was a touch too wide and how she hesitated before making a comment that didn’t sound totally sincere.

So, Rarity hadn’t totally lost her mind. But for the life of her, Rainbow Dash couldn’t figure out why. She knows those clothes would be terrible...it’d probably even make her look bad for having made them. So why do it? The Rarity I know would never let her name get dragged through the mud like that.

While it had taken Rainbow a bit of time to realize it, she’d found that Rarity wasn’t her polar opposite, as she had first thought. Rarity was driven and ambitious. She had her own goals and desires outside of everyday Ponyville life and she was determined to succeed--to not only be better than everypony else, but better in new and different ways: to impress ponies not by copying others, but to a blaze a whole new trail for others to follow.

After Jet Set and Upper Crust left, Rainbow landed and headed inside, depositing her latest pile of ‘one more things’ on the floor. “Hey.”

Rarity gave a surprised little jump at the sudden sound. “Rainbow Dash, you frightened me!”

“Sorry.” Dash’s tone didn’t sound the least bit apologetic. She tensed, waiting for what she knew was coming…Only it didn’t. Rarity recovered from her sudden surprise and slumped, looking utterly spent. “Uh, you okay?”

“Oh fine darling, simply fine!” Rarity suddenly straightened up and plastered a smile on her face. “I just got some new feedback from some my clientele. They had the most ...interesting suggestions.” Her eye twitched slightly. “But I have something for you!” A dress floated over from a ponyquin on the far side of the room. “I wanted you to take a sneak peek at your bridesmaid dress!” She beamed proudly.

Rainbow’s face contorted in a mixture of loathing, shock, horror and disbelief. How in Equestria could anything be that ruffly and pink?! It looked as though Rarity had snapped and scalped Pinkie Pie and made a dress out of her mane. It seemed to suck all the cool out of the room, creating a zone of, well, anti-cool.

Dash goggled, wondering how on Equestria (and why) Rarity would ever think she would like that...thing. It’s like she doesn’t even know me at all! The stray thought led her back to her earlier suspicions about being sent on a wild-griffon chase all over the city.

“...Seriously, Rarity?” Rainbow looked at her incredulously.

“Is something wrong?” Rarity asked, her smile getting even wider. Like a shark.

“Well, it’s kinda--” She looked for just the right word. “Pink. Like, really pink. And ruffly. It looks, well, sissy.”

“You don’t like it.” Rarity’s voice was flat and hard as steel. “Well, of course you don’t like it!” She let out a frustrated scream as she tossed the dress aside.

Slightly nervous, Rainbow Dash took a half step back as Rarity raised a hoof...only to press it dramatically against her forehead “Woe is me! No pony likes my designs! When I make things the way I want, the nobles complain. When I make things the way they want, then Cadance complains, and now you hate your dress too and this is all turning into a complete disaster!”

After a couple of failed attempts, Rainbow managed to work her jaw enough to get out a soft, “I’m sorry, Rares…”

“Oh yes, you're sorry and Cadance is sorry and you're all sorry, but you still hate my designs!”
She began to bawl. “Go away! Leave me alone!

Rainbow flattened her ears against her head, feeling low. “Rarity...I--”

“I said I VANT TO BE ALONE!”

Somehow feeling even worse, Rainbow Dash beat a hasty retreat. The last thing she heard as she flew out was the sound of heavy sobbing punctuated by the odd nom of Rarity gorging herself on ice cream.