Mario was a dignified man. I don’t really know what that means but I’m sure it’s true.
After arriving in World 8 Mario was surprised to see not lava and fire but another colourful world like the first one. “What eh a rip-off” Mario exclaimed in his stereotypical Italian voice. “But I guess Nintendo’s been ah running out of ideas since da ‘new’ Super Mario Brothers series.” He thought to himself aloud. He walked for a few minutes until he reached a sign that said “Welcome to Ponyville”.
Mario was in Ponyville.
He walked into town ready to satisfy his thirst for stomping turtles. But this town was filled with horses. Whatever, an enemy is an enemy he thought.
His first target was Berry Punch walking along the road or path or whatever. As he approached her she freaked out having never seen an Italian before. Cowering in place Mario saw this as an easy kill. Jumping in the air and landing on her with a soft thud she was squashed under his boots. This act caught other ponies’ attention. Mario didn’t really care however as some began to approach, it’d be easier to have them come to him. He was disappointed however that the pony gave him no gold coin. This isn’t right he thought. Rainbow Dash was now close by and looked ready to attack. Without warning Mario dashed to her side and picked her up over his head. “Put me down” she screamed.
Mario didn’t listen.
He carried her as he ran through the Ponyville streets stomping on ponies as he went. At this point the town was in panic and running everywhere. He took Rainbow to a store named “Sugar Cube Corner”. Some ponies had taken refuge in there from the chaos; they now hid under the tables as Mario entered the building. Rainbow Dash continued to scream but couldn’t break free from his grip. Pinkie saw the new customers and bounced towards them, “Ou, ou, are you guys playing a game, can I play?” Mario ignored the pony and headed to the counter where he laid Rainbow down and tied her legs to the glass.
“Alright’a, time for answers horse! Where am I?” Rainbow began to calm down when Pinkie arose from beside Mario,
“So…. Whatcha doing?” Pinkie said still in a joyful voice. Mario slapped her sending her to the floor motionless. Rainbow Dash started up again wrestling against her restraints. He punched her in the stomach making Rainbow Dash spurt blood and switch from screaming to crying. Mario shot off questions to her,
“Where am I? Is this the next Smash Brothers or some shit? Where are you keeping the Princess?” None of his questions would be answered as he was quickly hit in the side of his head sending himself reeling into some tables he bounced back up to see Pinkie in a Karate stance. She had tied a Karate headband around her head and readied for the fight of her life. Mario knew he could take her however and he jump with a flying kick knocking her into an old record that began to play epic bar fighting music. They matched each other in speed as they swung high and low kicks they fought over the counter and over Rainbow constantly throwing near miss attacks. After a few minutes Pinkie hooked Mario well in the jaw, however this left her open for a counter attack, that’s when he kicked her in the chest crashing her unconscious into the wall.
Mario was angry.
When Pinkie woke up she was tied up like a pig with her nose and knees resting on the store floor and rump in the air. Not much time seemed to pass as the same ponies still cowered under Sugar Cube Corner’s tables. She heard someone shuffling behind her, It was Mario. No shit. Without warning and against everyone’s expectations he whipped out his impressive veiney dick, much thicker than any horse cock in Equestria. And he rested it on top of her booty. Pinkie had seen too much porn to know where this was going. She squirmed and hopped helplessly away crying her eyes out yelling for help. She looked towards the ponies under the tables but they were far too scared to budge. Mario grabbed Pinkie’s tail and dragged her back into position, and then lunged his penis into her. Pinkie’s vagina was tight and warm mmmmmmmm. Mario now pulled out and pumped his babymaker back in constantly, getting more aroused by Pinkie’s pleas for mercy, “YAHOOO” “YAHOOO” he yelled out with each insertion, after a few minutes he got bored of pinkie and let her fall to her side, he had a mission to attend to, and the rainbow pony had told him the princess was in the castle on the mountain side. That’s all the info he needed, he exited sugar cube corner and equipped his new flying hat, sporting two blue wings. He flew off to his destination where he would be arrested for his crimes, and sentenced to death.
Mario is dead.
Until the author was told you need 1000 words to submit anything to a shitty pony fanfiction site.
Mario awoke. Locked in a cellar. “Ah Dammit” He proclaimed. The stank and dank dungeon smelled of elder berries. Mario called out to the grey pegasus guard beyond the bars. “Come here”.
The Pegasus Came
The Guard looked at Mario. a kind of troubled and uncomfortable glare, like that of a pony who must explain to his paraplegic filly that her dreams of becoming a wonderbolt will never come true. Mario Reached for the extra fire flower he always stored in his overalls. *BLOOP* *BLOOP*. Mario sent a fireball flying right into the old guards face. He screamed as his flesh melted away.
Mario was badass
Breaking free, Mario ran through the dungeon which was a setting that finally resembled the world he knew. Surprisingly getting to the throne room was easy as the worthless royal guards’ spears where no match for shear flower power. Mario was now face to face with the imposter princess. “CELESTIA! I’m calling you out.” Celestia halted her guards’ movements and majestically stepped down the throne-way, the glass paintings creating patterns of colour along her rock’n body. Mario’s eyes literally opened and roared with fury. “You’re a jackpoot that’s what you are Celestia!”, The eyes squeak. Celestia Pulled fourth her sun blade and rushed forward to make quick work of the boy champion of the mushroomites.
Mario Stood his ground
The Battle would rage on for countless hours into the night. But like all fights, it ended with them becoming best friends. Mario and Celestia would grow old together and Princess Peach would stay captured to be Bowsers slave or whatever he wants her for. It was a smart idea manipulating his pipe.
Fin.
