Hellsing Abridged Plus Georgia
Chapter 1: Very Enthousiastic Walks
Hello there names Georgia. I'm one of the few vampires living in Ponyville. Yes I'm a vampire so deal with it. Unlike my kin I don't murder innocents for a late night snack. No I am a bounty hunter, and I eat on the job.
I was lounging in a large, ornate wooden chair on the opposite side of a desk were an orange Rainbow Dash re color (sorry Daring Do) typed some things into a computer. I've been in this alternate dimension for a few months living with the me from this world. "Can you take up the job?" asked Daring Do referring to this little assassination gig she asked me to undertake. I wasn't a part of the E.S.P.N, and they sure as hell wanted me, and all my kind dead, but alas they needed me at the moment. The job was to kill a drug lord by the name of Crystal Shard some unicorn pony who messed with the royal sisters attempting to kill Celestia not once, but three times! Nopony seamed able to catch him...that's were I came in.
"I'll do it I suppose." I said grabbing my blood red bonnet from the desk, and placing it on my head "Got nothing better to do." I grabbed the paper, and got to my feet.
"Bring back his head, and I'll make sure the guard stop hunting you down miss Georgia Daniels." said Daring. I gave her a salute before morphing into shadow, and zipping out of the E.S.P.N HQ out into Ponyville. I landed in the alley behind Sugar Cube Corner. The stallion supposedly came her every now, and then to get a bite to eat, and I planned to kill him when he did.
It was four hours later when I finally saw the target. A blue furred unicorn with a teal mane, and eyes. Besides him were two earth ponies with large shotguns in their meaty hands. I smirked drawing my two lovely pistols. In my right hand was 'Damnation' a silver M1911 with a much longer barrel, and slide it had a long silver blade on the bottom of the gun starting at the trigger guard, and stopping about two inches from the barrels end. In my left hand was a golden copy of Damnation named 'Redemption'. I loaded them, and extended my wings. "Let's do this!" I said to myself flapping my wings, and flying up. If it weren't for my clothing that covered every part of my body besides my face that was protected by my bonnet my skin would be burning. The men didn't even notice me pathetic.
I spun in the air before aiming my self towards the stallions, and with a mighty flap of my wings sending me right at them. "KOWABUNGA!" I shouted drawing my pistols, and firing a mag into each of the armed personal seeing the blood, erupting from them with each shot ignited a blood rage. I landed in front of the stallion causing a bit of dust to be sent flying into the air. I bared my fangs with a grin as I aimed my guns at the mans chest. Right before I pulled the triggers he started slow clapping, and the air felt like sludge "What the hell....." I said to myself.
"Looks like the E.S.P.N sent another dog to try, and kill me why I'm flattered!" he said in a breytish accent as he drew a strange device from his hip "I guess I get to test my new toy then....." BLAM Damnation spat out it's .45 round into his chest while he was talking. "How did you...."
"Fuck you that's how." I said with a grin shooting him a second time. He stumbled back snarling as he pointed the device at me.
"Goodbye miss Daniels!" he shouted pushing a button in the center of the boxy device. A moment later I was enveloped with a red cage of energy. "Say hello to whoever kills you for me!" I couldn't move, I couldn't fight...I was helpless as my physical form was ripped apart, and shipped to a whole other world!
"So you came" said a vampiric priest in the middle of the woods to another vampire dressed in a red trench coat, and wide brim hat "To bad it's far to late!"
"Huh?" said the red dressed vamp.
"Everybody else is already dead!" he said gesturing to the army of rotting figures known as ghouls behind him "Except this little tot" he exclaimed grabbing a police girl, and putting his head close to her neck "Don't worry I still plan to kill her."
"Mmhuh" the red vampire exclaimed.
"But first I'm going to rape her!" the vampire Priest stated.
"Neat" was all the red one could say.
"But before I can do any of that.....IM GOING TO KILL YOU!" shouted the priest.
"You see that would be intimidating of you were well....intimidating." mocked the red clothed vampire.
"Are you mocking me?!" asked the vampire priest angrily tightening his grip on the police girl.
"No no nono no....pst yeah!" said the red vampire pulling the trigger on his silver handgun shooting the police girl in the chest the bullet passing clean through her killing the vampire priest. The girl fell to the ground bleeding heavily "That should about wrap things up here." the police girl gurgled, and that got the red vampires attention "Oh I forgot about you"
"Sorry about that whole shooting you thing" he began then sitting on his knees beside her "but I know if you look deep into your heart...which is currently all over that tree you'll find a way to forgive me." he finished. The police girl attempted to speak again which resulted in another gurgle. "Oh you look like a puppy. A poor blood ovicerated puppy." tears started to well up in her eyes as she gurgled again "Fine I'll help you! But only because you've got nice tits." said the vampire opening his mouth, and burrying his fangs into her neck, and drinking.
Meanwhile in between worlds
Have you ever been reduced to particles, and being forced across planes of exsistance? It hurts almost as bad as being ripped in two, burned by sunlight, and decapitated all at once and then some....I speak from experience. I couldn't lose consciousness as much as I wanted to, and that annoyed me. When I though it couldn't take it anymore I was blinded, and felt my form rebuilding itself. I passed out, and awoke laying in a dirt clearing in the woods somewhere. I groaned as I got to my feet, and holstered my guns. Taking a moment to take a look around I saw a man in a red trench coat of sorts wearing a wide brim hat. "Hey!" I called to him trying to get his attention. When I saw his teeth burried in a woman's neck I knew what I was faceing. A vampire. I drew my pistols and aimed as he took his fangs out of her neck.
"Sup bitch." he answered grinning blood surrounded his mout, and dribbled down his pale chin. I snarled, and cocked Damnation, and Redemption before approaching the monster. He drew his own gun a large silver handgun with some words I couldn't make out written in the side. "Oh let me guess your going to try, and kill me? If you are let me tell you your not the first."
"Well seeing as you just killed, and fed off a girl I'd say yes I will have to try, and kill you." I answered as we eyed each other's movements. He was clearly and experienced fighter that was for sure. I attacked first firing a flurry of .45 bullets at the man who effortlessly dodged each shot returning a seven shot barrage that tore holes in my chest splattering blood all over a nearby tree.
I reloaded my guns, and aimed again "Your a tough bitch aren't you?" he asked slamming a new mag into his gun as well "I like em tough!"
"Sorry I'm taken." I said as my wounds mended. "But I can point you to the nearest matchmaking service building though." I said with a large grin.
He laughed "I like you your not like those other dicks I fight...or Integra for that matter." he said holstering his gun. "How about we go back to my place, and watch some Adventure Time?"
"Sure why the hell not, but I'm taking that police girl with us." I said picking her up, and watching as the vampire ran off. I followed him, and thus my adventure began.