I have have traversed the infinitesimal dimensions of ba‘ale shem, seen into the infinite and lived and more stories have been told of me then I can remember. My name is Nicolas Flamel and I am a Wizard and an immortal. My hobbies include astroplaning, dining with the fae and My Little Pony. This is the tail of how I realized my obsession. It's really not that hard to imagine that a wizened old wizard like myself would yearn for a world less boring then the one you no doubt are reading this from. So please allow me tell you the story of my travels in the land of Equestria.
I was in my workshop in Manhattan, doing wizard-y things as one might often do when they are trying to open a portal to another dimension. In fact this night was the summer sun solstice and it was very important that I cast this spell when the moon is full. I had specifically planted some Queen-of-the-Night a few years back for this exact spell and they had finally decided to bloom on the correct night. Being the fickle plant they are, they only bloomed one day a year and not always the same day of the year.
I sat there in my dusty old chair, I watched the hill I had planted the cactus on years ago glowing in the moonlight. I pulled out my stopwatch and rechecked my calculations. Everything was going exactly according to plan. I grabbed my pack of magical supplies and stuffed a few food items in it. I picked up my magic wand as I exited the door. I had to make a run to get to the top of the hill in time. And though I was immortal, being nearly seven hundred years old still plays hell with your body.
By the time I made it to the top of the hill I was out of breath but the air was scented with the aroma of hundreds of blooming flowers. Now was the time. I opened my bag and grasped a bottle of unicorn tears. How did I obtain these you may ask? well it was a very very long time ago and suffice it to say many sad unicorns where involved in acquiring it. Anyways I had managed to use only a few drops in the many years I had, had them, but tonight sadly; I would have to use the whole bottle. One does not simply open the doors to oblivion without shedding a few tears. I only hoped the spell worked or I would have to find ‘other’ methods of getting the doors to open. methods not unlike how a thief might break a door down; quite messy I assure you.
I stepped into the center of the grove, at the very top of the hill, I carefully poured the contents of the bottle onto the ground creating the shape needed to open the correct door. the shape was revealed to me over the course of several psychedelic drug induced sooth saying sessions. 'Magic was not all books and spells after all.'
As I poured the tears around me in a circle to complete the image I had recalled, my excitement grew; the normally silver liquid began resonating with an eerie purple glow. ‘a good sign’.
I raised my wand to the moon and began the chant “hom,killell shemtellick, hockmosta, chemtellick or sonitica” I repeated the chant over and over. slowly a golden trail of ‘dust’ began to spill from my wand, I could feel the magic flowing from my spirit through the wand. It had been many years since I had last cast a spell this tiring but I pushed on, determined to finish the spell before the moon fell much further and my chance lost.
Finally the magic spilling out of my wand touched with the glowing purple circle around me and a bright flash blinded me. I fell to the ground exhausted. Slowly my vision returned and I opened my eyes. Before me lay a golden path leading into the sky. It had worked! I quickly picked my things up and began to follow the path.
Sometimes the way magic works is not exactly the way you think it will and even 600 years later magic still managed to surprise me and this was one of those times. for I had expected some kind of astral door or even a mystical portal like I has seen in those mine craft games I played from time to time, but this . . .
The path lead to a cliff edge. Hesitantly I stepped out onto presumably open air. I let a breath out that I had not realized I had been holding. I was relived when my foot met a solid surface. I never did like using flight magic, it was always so exhausting.
I walked a few feet out into the air and then looked back the way I came. But all I saw was as if through a fogged glass, nothing but blurry shapes vaguely reminiscent of a hill with green on it.
The world began to spin, I felt like I was both falling and flying, I felt like I was in a hundred places at once and nowhere at once. I closed my eyes or at least I think I had closed my eyes but the plains of oblivion where devoid of human understanding. I heard a scream as if a man in agony, then I realized is was my own voice, a chill ran up my spine. The world went from million colors to the suddenness of darkness.
Slowly the world . . or at least a world of some familiarity came creeping back into me. I could feel the distinct sense of wind rushing across my skin, the coldness of it. I felt the skin on my eyelids, I been closing my eyes after all and so I opened them.
I was falling! I took a moment to look at the sky around me. it was night and a beautiful moon shone in the sky much bigger then I remembered.
I took note that none of the constellations where anything I had remembered seeing. But that would have to wait, I was falling after all and being that the occupation of knowledge in a human body required a working brain I decided that it was more important to keep my skull from getting crushed into the rapidly approaching ground or any other part of my body for that matter.
I reached behind me and flipped my cape away from my face and held it down with one hand while my other reached into my backpack. I felt around and managed to take hold of some bed slippers. Yes you heard me; slippers. Very important slippers to.
I slipped them on my feet. and rather suddenly I was flipping around and now falling head first. I bent myself up and managed to get the center of my mass over my feet and righted myself. I must have looked like a drunk trying to keep balanced as the enchanted slippers did there best to throw themselves out from under me.
Gradually my descent slowed and it became easier to stand. I looked down and saw what looked like the tops of trees. I braced myself as the first branch slapped me in the face, and then the second , I put my hand over my face to shield it from the worst of the pain and finally I had punched through the canopy and landed on my behind on the ground. I looked up into the trees I had just come through, the darkness surrounding me was quite a contrast from the golden-moon light sky I had just fallen from.
So it was I had entered the world of colorful talking equines. I was excited to say the least, but more than that. This was my chance to explore a new world. Not some plane of oblivion filled with demons and demigods, not some far off world of elves and dwarves. But something completely new. I felt like a kid again.
I stood up, my back cracked loudly ‘ow!’I yelled in pain. well . . I felt like a kid in spirit at least.
I looked around and began to wonder if there was a way I could find a town. There had to be one somewhere if it was anything like the show I so dearly loved. I shrugged and pulled my wand out of my breast pocket. I looked around and saw a small puddle of water near the spot I had fallen to. I spoke a spell I had cast many times. it was a low level scrying spell. I placed the tip of my wand into the murky water and watched as an image appeared of a small hut of some kind with smoke coming from a hole in the top of a thatched roof. There were strange designs all over the hut and many different colored mask of various shapes and sizes.
Now the tricky part. I pictured the hut I had seen in my minds eye. I lifted my magic wand to my forehead and then quickly cast my thoughts into it and then flicked my wand at the ground. but nothing happened. So then I cast it again. . .still nothing. Now I was miffed completely. Either this world was playing tricks with my magic or someone was blocking my spell. So I went back to the water and cast the scrying spell again but this time nothing happened . .
‘Now that is interesting’ I thought to myself. I've only been here for a half an hour and already I’ve revealed my presence to some kind of mage or wizard. really it could be anything with even a little magical talent. I kicked the dirt in frustration. I suppose I could cast another scrying spell but the further I look the harder it will be to cast it. It would be much easier if I could just talk to this wizard or whatever it was I had frightened.
Finally I decided I would try to cast the spell again. after all I was a motherfucking six-hundred year old immortal wizard and I’ll be damn if some upstart is going to out magic me.
I rolled up my sleeves and shook my arms out a few times, I even ran in place a few times just to get the blood flowing. “ok, ok I can do this”
I imagined the hut in my minds eye again. I recalled every detail of it it. from the way the smoke wafted and curled through the tiny hole in the roof, to the individual shades of green of the leaves around the hut.
Usually when I cast this spell it required little magical force but this time I dug deep into my reservoir of magical within me, I took a deep breath, I could feel the opposing magical force trying to block the flow of magic but I kept concentrating, ignoring the presence of it while still keeping the image of the hut in my head.
The longer I held onto the magic the harder it was becoming to concentrate. Sweet began to bead on my forehead. I scrunched up the skin on my forehead and forced even more magic into the spell, I could feel the opposing spell cracking. I let out a short “hy-ya” and let the full force of my magic out with a quick flick of my arm. there was a loud crack as magic shot out of my wand and into the ground. The feeling of magical release was not unlike letting a bow string fly after holding it back for two long.
I looked down at the small glowing orb at my feet. it would lead me to this wizard or whatever it was that lived in the hut. “HA!! take that” I said triumphantly.
I walked off in the direction the orb was pointing; practically skipping all the way.
Author's Note
I was bored and I felt like writing. I have no idea if this story is any good or not but I like it and I guess that is enough.
More chapters to come. Maybe once every two weeks. It just depends on my mood. Sometimes I get really motivated and other times I just feel like diking around on the internet all day.
If anyone wants to edit this I'd be grateful. just note me about it and I'll credit you completely.
As I walked through the woods I came upon a path well worn by hooves. It was a sign that I was getting close. I could spell the scent of burning wood in the air and see a dim light through the brush further up the path. I waved a hand dismissively as I canceled out the spell I had set up to begin with. Besides I had already accidentally made the person or persons whom I was about to meet very suspicious as it is and having some kind of floating ball of magic heading toward them might make things worse then it already was.
I could see the hut I had spied before in the puddle clearly now. I stopped and looked around to make sure no one was going to sneak up on me before stepping up to the door of the hut. I made a fist and raised my hand to knock, But just as my fist was about to strike the dull green wood of the door I stopped.
"no need to knock, the door is unlocked" came the voice from inside
I should have known a mage or whatever it was could sense a magic force as strong as mine. I tried to make myself as presentable as possible. I straitened my collar and tidied my cloak and quietly opened the door. The first thing I noticed was how warm the room was. After being outside for so long I was a little numb and it was nice to be next to a fire. Presently this fire resided under a massive cauldron of some kind. it was black and rounded at the bottom with three feet each ending in three toes. I almost laughed at how story book it all was.
The door closed behind me, startling me into a jump. I quickly turned around but saw nothing their. It was at this moment that I realized that I could not see anyone in the room yet I could feel them. their magic was a bit primal and unlike any witch I had ever known. 'warlock maybe' I thought to myself but remembering back to that voice it sounded female and as far as I could remember I had never met any female warlocks. No if anything whoever it was, was definitely something closer to a witch.
"I did not mean to startle you, I only seek shelter and maybe someone to talk to." I looked around the small house but neither saw saw nor heard any sign of the women or thing that lived there.
"you say you are a friend and yet you could be one to pretend".
'How Odd' I thought. 'was she rhyming intentionally?'. It did not matter I was becoming increasingly more distraught at having to talk to a disembodied voice. furthermore whoever it was was good at masking there life force or I would have sensed them directly, but as it was I could only tell that they where close but not in what direction they where.
I weighed my options. I could start shooting a dispel spell randomly in hopes of hitting the person and forcing them to show. But then I would lose any chance at actually gaining any willful help. I immediately put that thought out of my head. The second option was to continue chatting with whoever was in the room and to convince them that I meant no harm. But that meant they could just sit sight preparing some kind of massive spell and disabling me or killing me outright before I could act. But that was why I was getting so service in the first place. I thought for a moment and decided that the voice was nonthreatening.
I sat down and crossed my legs, both knees cracked loudly but without any pain.
"look" I said as disarmingly as I could "I have come a very very long way to get here. I am sorry I have bothered you and whatever you where doing, but one wizard to another I ask you if you would be willing to simply answer a few questions and I will be on my way. I don't think I would have come all this way to hurt someone I have never even met do you?"
I waited in silents for a while, I began to wonder if I should just up and leave when I blinked and in that quick of a motion there she was. I screwed up my eyes trying to understand the thing I was looking at. It looked kind of like a pony from the ones I had seen but colored like a Zebra. though I had no way of knowing if the stripes went all the way down the body of the being as she . . .yes I decided the face was distinctly feminine . .was covered in a dark cloak much like my own.
"you are something new" She spoke.
'she must being doing it for a reason "uh new?" I said stupidly.
"yes you, you are new, for I have never seen another creature that looks like you . . do" Said the Zebra pony.
I thought about it and it made sense. There probably where no humans here and so I guess her description was not exactly inacurite.
I gave a disarming smile but it had the opposite effect that I had intended. the Zebra pony stepped back with what I thought was a look of disgust. I decided that I might as well give her as much information about me as sI could before she got a chance to ask me to leave. After all though this land looked a lot like the show I so loved, it was still just another dimension and did not necessarily match in every aspect the knowledge I had obtained about it from said show. For one the moon did not look exactly the way it had looked in the show. But most surprisingly; though admittedly logical thing about this whole place was how nothing looked cartoony. I mean sure the Pony Zebra had the same proportions as the ponies in the show, but her coat was covered in fine short fur, she had more then one dimension to her. it was not flat colors or shading. The fire made everything in the room give off moving shadows with depth and clarity.
Rather then make any more mistakes in whatever way culturally I might be doing I went with the basic facts. no smiling, no jokes, just the facts. "My name is Nicolas Flamel and I am a wizard, I come from another world in another dimension, my species is called Human. I have come here because I am very old and I have seen many things but it has become boring and so I have come to this land for adventure."
I continued to explain how I had come to be here, how I had cast the spell to open the gates to oblivion, and as I told more of my travels the Zebra Pony became visibly more relaxed and even stopping me to ask questions every now and then. I had come to the understanding that she herself was much like a wizard though closer to a herbalist then a wizard but not quite what you might call a witch. In the end I just decided she was lightly magical but highly knowledgeable on many aspect of magic.
After I finished my story she held out a single hoof and I took note that her stripes did in fact go the length of her body. "You may call me Zecora, and I am glad to know more about ya".
I stood up and took her hoof in my hand, it was a strange sensation touching a living being from the realm I had dreamed of coming to, it was almost magical for lack of a better word. I was grateful that the common gesture of a han- hoof shake was the same as in my home world. I shook Zecora's hoof and smiled widely. Zecara's face took on the same look as before.
I let her hoof drop and sat back down. The room had filled with silents again. Zecora rubbed her other leg nervelessly.
"Zecora . . " I said comely. "why do you get frightened when I smile? do you not smile in this land?."
The stripped pony sat down and started digging a hole in the dirt floor with her front hoof but finally she spoke.
"This one knows, you eat the flesh of other souls . . ." She let the statment drift in the air without ever making eye contact.
Finally it clicked! She must have saw the canines in my mouth and deduced that I was a meat eater.
"Oh" I said frankly "you mean because of my teeth. Well yes I have eaten meat. But in my world animals do not talk, they do not have sentience like you or I. And another thing. I am not a meat eater, I eat plants too. In fact if you would be so kind to let me have a bowel of whatever you have cooking I would love to show you"
Zecora stood up and made her face level with mine. I locked eyes with her and stuck out tongue and crossed my eyes, then we both started laughing loudly. By the end of the Night we had both eaten our fill and I had given Zecora a few dried herbs I had taken with me for her hospitality. She was more then excited to have the opportunity to try some new potions with them. I explained to her how each one was used in my world and what kinds of properties they each contained. In the morning she drew me a map of the trails she had made over the yeas and gave me directions to the nearest town and I was ecstatic because it was the first name I had heard since being here that I actually recognized from the show. Before I left she gave me a few helpful notes on some of the basic potions and plants you could use in the area as well as a helpful warning about some of the more dangerous things in it.
And with that I was off to the next part of my adventure.
Author's Note
The reason he did not recognize Zecora is because in the world I have created I wanted to have his reaction to meeting another magical being that he had never met before. If he had known about Zecora it would have been boring for me to write about him fanboying over her. Much more interesting to write her as a stranger to him.
But don't worry too much about it. I have plans to make some funny jokes when he finally does meet somepony he knows from the show.
