Twilight Loves Colt Bands

by keaton-furman-prower

Rating: everyone
Tags: Flash Sentry, Twilight Sparkle, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1150

Twilight Sparkle dedicates a room of her new castle to her love of colt bands!

Not everypony likes colt bands. But Twilight has always loved them. So when she gains her own castle, she turns one of its rooms into a Chamber of Colt Bands.

Will she be able to inaugurate it without any unpleasant surprises?

Written in about half an hour due to writer's block and boy band music. Dedicated to all people (and ponies) who love (or love to hate) boy bands.

Also contains some implied FlashLight.

Published 2014-05-31 22:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-31 22:00:02 UTC

Backstreet's Back, All Right!

“All right! Just one more and it's done!”

Twilight had been busy in the first week since the destruction of her library and the birth of the new friendship castle. It hadn't been easy to lose the place where she had lived for the past few years, but her efforts at turning the castle into something she could live in had been quite successful; it now boasted one of the biggest libraries in all of Equestria, as well as a large number of amenities which made the vast castle feel just like her old home.

There was one thing it had been missing so far, however; one thing she had always wanted to have, but had never had the space for. Here, in the secrecy of her castle, she was finally unleashing her deepest and darkest secrets.

“I love Colt Bands!”

As she said this, she stuck one last poster into place. It depicted five young stallions posing attractively in trendy clothing; Hoofie Dorough, Nick Caballus, A. J. BigMac (Twilight was convinced he was somehow related to the Apple Family), Brian Littrot, and Kevin Reinchardson.

All around her, she was surrounded by similar posters, of coltish stallions posing attractively. This, however, was just the decorations; in the middle of the room there was a moderately-sized dance floor, with a disco ball rolling above it. Behind it there were various records, neatly organized for the various bands that were represented on the wall. Finally, there was a large stage with big speakers.

“This is so awesome!” Twilight said excitedly. “I have finally achieved my dream... I have created the Chamber of Colt Bands! Now nopony shall ever be able to deny me the pleasure of listening to all my favorite music!”

It was at that moment that the alarm began to ring.

“Aw, come on! What is so important that it has to interrupt my inauguration of the Chamber of Colt Bands?!”

The frustrated princess trotted towards the door, undoing the heavy locks keeping the door in place. She then pressed a button next to the door, simultaneously casting an illusion spell which instantly hid the various posters, records, speakers, and dance floor from sight and replaced them with a rather eye-gouging series of bright clashing colors, and disabling a soundproofing spell which prevented any other ponies in the castle from knowing what lie within the chamber.

“What's the matter?” Twilight said as she opened the door slightly.

“Didn't you hear, your majesty?” said a yellow-orange pegasus in golden armor. “We wished to know when you were going to choose our new captain.”

Twilight mentally facehoofed. She had been so caught up in the construction of her chamber that she had forgotten about the newly-instated friendship guard sent to protect her castle.

“Oh, I will get on that, mister...”

“Flash Sentry,” said the guard.

“Yes! I remember!” said Twilight. “Weren't you at the Crystal Empire?”

“I got transferred here a few days ago,” said Flash. “Most of the other guys just finished training, though.”

“Oh, okay,” said Twilight. “Anyway, tell your friends that I'll make my decision soon. In the meantime, I have something I really need to do.”

“In there?” said Flash. “It sure looks ugly.”

“Oh, that?” Said Twilight. “It's... top secret princess stuff!”

With that, Twilight quickly closed the door and pushed the button.

“Now, let us inaugurate the Chamber of Colt Bands!”

Jumping onto the dance floor, she levitated a record from the Backstreet Colts file and placed it onto the player. As the music began to play, she began to dance alongside it. The lyrics were cheesy, the voices were young and somewhat immature, and the music was incredibly unoriginal. And yet, for all its flaws, Twilight loved it.

As she danced around wildly, she failed to notice that she had forgotten a crucial detail when dismissing her unfortunate guard. Moreover, she didn't notice that she now had an audience. It was a single pony, but it was still an audience.

“You like that?”

Twilight yelped out in shock. She then turned around to see Flash staring at her with a mix of confusion and curiosity.

“Ah! How did you get in here?! The door was locked!”

“Uh, no it wasn't.”

Twilight turned towards the door and saw that the locks were indeed off. She facehoofed in frustration before facing Flash.

“Okay, so I forgot to lock the door. I'm going to have to remember not to do that ever again. But what makes you think you can just barge in?! There is clearly a sign outside that says Only Princesses beyond this point!”

“Um, no there isn't.”

Twilight screamed in frustration. There were so many security issues in the Chamber of Colt Bands that needed to be resolved.

Oh, how could I have done this?! I am a princess! I am supposed to notice this kind of things! How can I protect my love of Colt Bands when I can't even prevent a simple guard from invading my-

“You know, this is pretty cool.”

Twilight stopped her train of thought and stared at Flash in shock.

“What?!”

“This room is pretty cool,” said Flash. “I mean, I'm not sure I've ever seen a whole room dedicated to Colt Bands. I mean, it's kind of silly, but kind of fun at the same time.

Twilight's face lighted up.

“You like Colt Bands?”

“Well... yeah,” said Flash, his face turning pink. “I mean, I know they're only really popular with fillies, but they're not all bad.”

Twilight began to grin. Perhaps she had someone she could share her dominion with.

“Well then, Captain Flash Sentry, would you like to help me inaugurate the Chamber of Colt Bands?”

The embarrassment that had been present on Flash's face was replaced with shock.

“Did you say... Captain?”

“Indeed,” said Twilight. “And your first duty is to assist me in carrying out the inauguration of the Chamber of Colt Bands!”

A goofy smile formed on the orange guard's face.

“All right! Let's begin this inauguration!”

Twilight nodded in approval as she reactivated the locks with her magic. She then turned the music back on, and spent the next three hours doing her silly dance with her new captain.

Author's Note

This is what happens when you start listening to boy band music while you're suffering from writer's block.

And I'm quite aware that all the pun names I made for the Backstreet Colts suck. Hey, you try to come up with horse-pun names for boy band members!

Anyway, don't expect to see anything like this ever again. I just need something to get over my current writer's block.

...Okay, expect something like this whenever I get writer's block. I sincerely hope that's never.

The Backstreet Boys are the first thing I can remember listening to when I was a kid. And I loved it.