The day the Naziman came to Ponyville

by Swimmingly

Rating: mature
Tags: Human, Dark, Alternate Universe, Comedy
Length: 1036

It was a happy day in Ponyville with picnics and partying until the skies got all dark and the Naziman came and started to kill everyone except people were okay with this because he had manners.

This story is unique in its appraisal of the human condition, it discusses in depth the prevalence if Nazism and conspiracist theories in the happy town if Ponyville.

It is also a true story.

Based of a novel based of a true story about the novel it was based on.

I'm really sorry.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-01 05:51:20 UTC

Número uno

The day the nazi death man came to Ponyville.

This one time Twilight Sparkle was asleep in bed but suddenly she woke up, still covered in sweat from having sex with with trees.

"Gee I'm all sweaty still from having sex with trees" exclaimed the stoic robust and all around statuesque pony "I best have a sexy shower with my Antonio Manederas Lifesize blow up sex doll, what could possibly go wrong"

Just then the nazi death man teleported into Ponyville and was throwing gas chambers at everyone, the pones thought it was rather quaint and laughed until they were crushed by the ovens of racial injustice.

Twilight Sparkle saw all this is inside her blowup dolls butt, because she was practicing the rusty trombone because she's cool.

Suddenly as if by magic Antonio came to life by Twilights magic.

Suddenly as if by magic also Rainbow Dash was punching holes through abortion clinics because she was pro-life, she was also eating newborn Babies while worshipping unborn babies because conservatives are cool like that.

One of the deboned freshly born child's wasn't deboned properly and she choked and died..

Rainbow Dash got over that and went home.

Just then suddenly as if by magic some newfag named Alfonso leaqas Morelia luison triberdaeras factiul aresto Mephistopheles asshat Leonardo capri McGee erupted out of the NazI mans guns and screamed.

"I like filler when I watched my anime, it's better than the stuff from the comics, and dubbed is wAy better ser-" he was immeduTly shot by everyone he cared about, right in his face, including Naziman.

Naziman didn't let the loss of his brother affect him too much, plus he had a guaranteed way of dealing with stress.

He grabbed a Jewish pony a threw them at the world hay centre.

Just then as if by extreme meta and enraged American comes to life and bigots.

"Hey my unborn son died in when the Hindus bombed 9/11, I wouldn't of cared if he was born but because I'm a conservative redneck I care that a foetus died, so I gave India the death penalty, not to mention I died during the attacks"

"No you didn't shut up" screamed some guy.

The buildings fell and squashed them both.

Just then a conspiracy theorist jumbled and then jumped out of the wreckage of the 11/9 bombs.

"Huzzah the Jews blew up 9/11 I knew it because jet fuel doesn't bu-"

He was immediately shot by everyone he ever cared about including NaZiman.

Just then fluttershy was being a dominatrix to the princesses and because her dom style was naziesque she had a nazi hat on.

She got the urge to make pizza, so she did.

It was very tasty.

But everyone got a piece.

Except Naziman.

Applejack Pinkie Pie Rarity were all on the other side of equestria in china fitting a horde of black KKK nazi chinamen with aids who were gay (the chinamen weren't gay, their aids were)

Just then as if by faggotry Rarity grew an inch or two and became a worm.

This startled everyone including the nazis and her friends.

Who all died painfully from disentry it was gross. But then as if by medicine rariworm cured them with medicine. It was magical pot that seemed magical because it was magical " hey Guis eat this magical pot that seemed magical when I bought it because it was magically magic, but it's still magic it at least seems to be magic" screamed the mysterious magic man mysteriously with and air of mic.

Soon to be freaked out bass players all banded together in a basement bea use bass players are assholes with no musical talent, trust me I am one, they were all worried because everyone was catching in to how little they did.

However their fagatronics were short lived, as Twilight Sparkle flew in with her earls following behind.

"Oi, you guys suck srsly bass, like lol what the eff is that some kind of fish" Twilight texted all the bassists even though she was in the same room.

All the faggyle bassists had a big soppy cry and drank some poisoned kool aid and died.

Meanwhile NaZiman and Antonio Manederas were killing everyone with space between the bits on a comb, however as by faith Jesus Christyfuck who isn't the poster boy from Christianity but his close friend popped up.

"Hi guys what're u up 2 m8t" Mr Christyfuck sed thru a blow torch.

"Were jus killing evey1 cus were cool like that trysts" said some guy named Geronimo however as if by fate, some girl named fate pooed on Geronimo and he dies painfully from disentry.

Back in Ponyville the mayor and the princesses were having a tea party and talking about boys cus they're cool like that. When suddenly a flash mob/awards ceremony/funeral/christening exploded killing everyone inside including nazimans unborn octopus child.

"Nooooooooooooo fag died y y y on no p" Nazimans freshly born deboned child screamed.

Naziman ate his newly deboned freshly born son.

Much to the queens dismay Twilight Sparkle had teleported into her basement and was in the process of throwing seeds all over her floor and peeing them, however they grey very rapidly as if by magic but it was because of twilights magic.

Naziman caught onto the queens dismay and flew there with Antonio and mr Christyfuck whilst throwing adds for the Mormon 9/11 Buddhist convention and wine tasting.

Everyone was excited to gi to the meeting especially since Naziman would be there. When suddenly they all died.

All the mane characters were all grouped up in a bin smoking crack and playing cards with all the bones from the deboned fresh children.

When suddenly a bunch if enraged soccer mums with wings all shat in the bin, but it was too late because twilight had died from toenail cancer.

Her funeral was very sad and everyone cried even Naziman and Antonio.

Mr Christyfuck couldn't cry because he was delivering the service it was full of fun and games with candy and children.

But then suddenly and finally they died from boredom except Naziman because he killed them with his laser gun.