It had been interesting, those short few minutes with Ditzy; Ever since having spoken to her, that nagging pain in my head had suppressed slightly, as though despite not knowing what to do about it, she'd somehow made it better. I kept thinking about what she said regarding not seeing my friends as potential romantic partners. It was easier said than done. As a dragon, I'd grown up around ponies, it only made sense that I would share a pony's sense of beauty. And to me, every one of my friends was beautiful in their own way.
As if some higher power beyond mortal comprehension was out to get me, I spotted Rarity in the market district of town. Not an uncommon occurrence, but unfortunate all the same. She spotted me just as I considered sneaking away. She waved me over and I was drawn in.
"Spike, darling! I haven't seen you in a few weeks." she said, greeting me with a warm embrace. Without thinking, I returned the hug and dared to kiss her cheek, a gesture she did not fail to notice. "My my, how bold of you, Spike. What brought that on?" she asked with neither negativity nor discomfort. If anything she seemed to be playing with the notion that I kissed her. I decided to play along.
"Forgive me, my lady. I have had a rather bad week as of late; I thought I would be selfish and steal a kiss from a diamond in the rough." I replied. As expected, Rarity placed a hoof over her mouth and giggled, just like a true lady. She then placed that same hoof into my hand.
"You're too kind, Sir. I'm sorry to hear you've had a bad week though. Is there anything I can do?" she offered. I squeezed her hoof gently.
"I don't believe so; unless you know anything about Polar Headaches." I said.
I could tell right away that Rarity was stumped. "Polar Headaches?" she enquired. I explained to her the nature of the headache, how it moved around in my head, like the needle of a compass, pointing in a certain direction. As expected, Rarity was unable to help. It came as no surprise. If Twilight couldn't identify it, Rarity had no hope. In terms of knowledge, Rarity and Twilight were polar opposites. Where Twilight specialised in the theoretical and general knowledge, Rarity was a more social oriented pony. Her network of knowledge consisted of her social interactions with customers, friends and the gossip from Aloe and Lotus.
"Ah, there's an idea," I said, gaining Rarity's full attention. "Perhaps it's stress related. Rarity, would you be interested in accompanying me for a trip to the spa?" I asked. Rarity gasped and placed her hoof over her heart.
"Oh, Spikey. You know just what to say to a girl." she replied. As I smiled and walked with her to the spa, I couldn't help but think to myself: Fat load of good that's done me though.
Truthfully, I didn't expect a spa treatment to fix my headache, though it did alleviate what stress had built up over the years. As expected, Rarity enjoyed herself. And I'd managed to surprise her by paying for the both of us. In the past the cost of a single spa treatment would have been a kick in the balls, but since Twilight had become a Princess, my role had changed, earning me an income the likes of which would make a Noble cry with envy. I was close to rich, without the ego that went with it.
I'd dropped Rarity off at her boutique/home and bid her a goodnight. My reward was her stealing back that kiss from earlier. I wanted to feel as though I could fly through space, but my earlier conversation with Ditzy prevented me from gaining such elation. So I simply smiled in gratitude for the gesture and left without another word.
As I made my way back from the boutique to the castle, I spotted a familiar blonde mare sitting on the edge of the town's fountain, looking up at the sky. Deciding I had some time left before Twilight would start worrying, I approached her.
"Counting Luna's stars, Ditzy?" I asked, taking a seat beside her. She jumped with a start before realising it was me.
"Seven hundred and forty-two as far as the eye can see." she replied. I was speechless; not a single pony would ever be able to keep track of the stars they'd already counted, yet somehow, Ditzy had.
"I guess that ocular defect has its perks, huh?" I asked. Ditzy just chuckled and leaned into me. Something didn't seem right with her. She seemed sad about something. My mind got the better of me and I immediately thought that something might have happened to Dinky, either physically, or emotionally. "Is everything alright?" I asked.
Ditzy looked up towards me and smiled, trying to hide the sadness. "I had a date tonight, but he blew me off. Turns out he'd lost a bet." Immediately, I placed my arm around her. "It isn't the first time it's happened. But what really upsets me is that my heart wasn't even really in it. My faith in romance is gone. Really, I just hunt for father-figures for Dinky." she said. It was difficult imagining a romantically impotent Ditzy. She was by her very nature, a bubbly mare with so much more to offer than anypony could ever know. Being one of her best friends, I could see what the others couldn't.
It broke my heart to know that nopony could love her without first bothering to get to know her. But a society of love and tolerance simply couldn't tolerate an accident-prone single mother. "No matter what anypony says about you, I'll know the truth about who you really are. A lovely, lovely refrain from the difficulties of the world. What you've just told me just proves that you're the strongest pony I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Anypony else would be curled up in a ball, crying their eyes out. Just goes to show what an amazing pony my best friend is."
As I spoke, Ditzy's eyes began to water, and her smile was trembling with pure joy. She gripped my arm tightly and pulled herself up towards me. I knew what was coming, and I didn't want to stop it. I met her halfway and I felt her lips again for the third time that day, but unlike before, it wasn't a friendly mock-romantic kiss. This time, Ditzy was showing true affection, appreciation and wanting. The almost electric sensation that tickled my mouth as she pressed her lips against mine made me want to do more, but I knew better than to act so quickly. For now, I was perfectly content with just holding her closely and kissing her.
I'd known for a while that I would choose Ditzy over the others, but it all boiled down to choice. I knew which pony I wanted to give my heart to, but hesitation born from the qualities the others possessed led my heart astray. It was a metaphorical tug of war that only the strongest pony would be able to win. And Ditzy showed me now, that she was the strongest, but ultimately desired somepony she could depend on. After all, strength is not infinite. She would have broken down eventually, but I would be damned if I was going to let that happen.
"You... are an angel, Spike. You came down from Canterlot and into my life. You took the time to get to know me, being nothing but kind and caring, Dinky finally found a friend in you... I told you earlier that if you kept on flattering me, I really would fall for you. But the truth is; I fell for you a long time ago." I'd read moments like these in romance novels. The moment when the two potential lovers bear their hearts to each other and see what page they're on. It was the make or break moment. And it was time I started making something with my life.
"Let's go out on a date tomorrow." I said, brushing a bit of her mane out of her face. She looked me in the eyes and I could have sworn she saw the same love she was projecting onto me.
She sniffled and wiped her eyes dry. "I can't tomorrow. Would the night after be alright?" she asked. I smiled and leaned in to kiss her again.
"The day after tomorrow it is then. I'll pick you up at six." I replied. Ditzy wrapped me up in a hug and gave me one last kiss before taking to the skies.
"I can barely wait." she said before flying off.
I watched as she flew off, the way she moved giving away the excitement she was no doubt trying to contain. "Nor I." I said. After she was gone, I looked up into the sky and counted the stars. "Yep, seven hundred and forty-two." I said, moving on to Twilight's castle.
As I opened the doors to the castle, I spotted the girls, all in their respective thrones, even Rarity. It would have been impossible for her to not notice Ditzy and I talking on her way here. And I'd find it hard to believe she wouldn't take the chance to try and help love bloom between us.
"Hi, girls... what brings you here at such a late hour?" I asked.
"Twilight." Applejack replied, as if that were an answer in itself. In a way, it was.
"And why has Twilight summoned everypony?" I asked, addressing the mare in third-person.
Twilight shifted in her seat and cleared her throat. "I realise the timing is terrible, but it's an emergency." she said before revealing a letter in a bright flash of light. The letter had the seal of the Royal Pony Sisters; a seal that Celestia would not use on a letter to Twilight unless it was of international importance. "Princess Celestia has ordered us all to Canterlot tomorrow to attend a meeting with the Dragon Empress. She's requested our aid."
"Wait, the Princess or the Empress?" Pinkie asked.
"The Empress. Whatever this meeting's about, its got the dragons pretty scared. Princess Celestia has asked that Spike be there as well." Twilight replied. "We leave first thing in the morning."
"I must say, darling. This is all very sudden. I understand that the Princess has asked us to come, but it leaves us next to no time to organize foalsitters. Maybe Ditzy will look after Sweetie Belle while we're gone." she said.
"No, Ditzy's busy tomorrow." I replied. Rarity looked at me with confusion painted on her face.
"How do you know that, Spike?" she asked.
"I spoke with her just after I dropped you off from the spa. I recommend leaving Sweetie Belle with Apple Bloom while you're away. She'll wind up there anyway, no matter who you leave her with." I said, taking my seat beside Twilight. A nifty little perk that the thrones had was that they grew with their user. When it was first erected, it was a tiny little seat, but now it occupied most of the space between Twilight's and Rainbow's.
Twilight paused for a moment as she tried to process what I'd said. "You were talking to Ditzy? What about?" she asked. I wasn't about to tell them that Ditzy got stood up by some colt who only asked her out as punishment for losing a bet. Thinking about that stupid bastard, even though I didn't know anything about him, just pissed me off. He'd hurt my Ditzy. But I suppose she wouldn't be mine if he hadn't.
Without realizing it, I'd gripped the arm of my throne in anger, thinking about that colt. Cracks were beginning to form in the crystal. This unwittingly worried the girls. I sighed and released my death grip on the throne. "If you must know, we have a date the day after tomorrow." I said, earning surprised exclamations from them all.
"Seriously?! You and Ditzy?" asked Rainbow. I turned to the chromatic pegasus and gave her a warning glare, which she took immediately as a sign to choose her next words carefully. "I mean... isn't she a little... clumsy for you?" she asked.
"She has an ocular defect which makes her nearsighted. If you took the time to get to know her, you'd know she has a diploma in Psychology from Oxford University.
"Seriously? She's actually smart?" Twilight asked. I sighed at their surprise at this knowledge. They didn't realize it, but this was my marefriend they were inadvertently insulting. I decided to screw with them.
I pointed to each pony in a clockwise order, starting from Twilight, then Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie and finally Rainbow. "Atychiphobia, Soteriophobia, Mysophobia, Pantophobia, Angrophobia and Apotemnophobia. For those playing the home game, these are a fear of failure, a fear of dependence, fear of dirt and/or germs, fear of everything, fear of anger and fear of being disabled." I said, pointing to each mare again as I explained the meaning behind those phobias. "Ditzy was able to correctly diagnose each of you on the day she met you. And don't try and deny those phobias, especially you, Twilight. Need I remind you of Lesson Zero?" I asked.
Each mare was dead silent as they tried to process what had just happened. I got up from my throne and made my way towards the back. "See you all in the morning." I called back before entering my room and closing the door behind me.
Author's Note
For those of you who believe that the Spike X Derpy ship was too quick, I'd just like to say that their relationship has been building since before the story arc began. Truthfully, the ship is merely a part of the story as a whole.
I couldn't wrap my head around it; since last week, I'd been getting a strange feeling in my head. It was a painful feeling, but that wasn't what made it strange. No matter where I turned, the pain would shift to accommodate the original direction, like a compass. Only problem was, there was nothing in Equestria's Draconic Biology books that had any record of such symptoms, not that those tomes would be expected to be of any assistance. The more valid description would be to say tome, as in singular. Very little was known about Dragons, and I was of no help, given I was raised by Ponies.
It wasn't a bad lifestyle per-say, certainly more enjoyable that what I'd experienced during one of the Great Dragon Migrations. For years, I held no love for my own kind after what those teenage dragons subjected me to, and for years more, I feared that such behaviour would become a part of my own nature as I grew. But I was pleased to discover that my lifestyle among Equestrians had matured me, ironically prematurely. Of all the ponies in my life there was one I could thank for raising me to be who I was. That pony's name was Twilight Sparkle. She was for all intents and purposes, my mother, having used her own magic to hatch me as part of a school entrance exam. But despite the fact that she raised me, she was still very young herself. So to me she was more of an older sister.
Nevertheless, my personality was based off of her own, at least all the good bits. I was certainly a lucky dragon to have her in my life. Being with her lead me to the pony of my dreams, Rarity. Easily the most beautiful out of our circle of friends. While I admit, I found the others appealing to some extent, none could shine brighter than a gem like Rarity. Her opalescent white coat and that rich Royal Purple mane and tail styled in extravagant curls. No matter how much I grew up, she would always take my breath away. Her younger sister, Sweetie Belle wasn't without her own attractive traits, but I'd rather hear their cat, Opal scratching against a blackboard than hear Sweetie's high pitched voice whenever she got excited.
Rainbow Dash. As acrobatically varied as a Rainbow, and about as difficult to dissuade from her path as a speeding arrow. Certainly beautiful in that tomboyish way, with her slender figure that allowed for aerodynamic manoeuvrability. Certainly a great role model, especially for Scootaloo, a late bloomer in terms of flight. Both were very attractive and certainly a great catch for any lucky stallion.
Applejack, ever the hard worker and honest to a fault. Virtually the physical opposite of Rarity. Where my dear (imaginary) marefriend despised getting dirty so much so it verged on a borderline phobia, Applejack had grown up around it. Being a farmer, it was near impossible not to get covered in mud, even if she was an Apple Farmer. Her younger sister, Apple Bloom; cute enough to steal even the heart of Cupid himself. She seemed disinterested in romance, yet enjoyed my company. I knew what that meant.
Pinkie Pie. What could I say about her? If crazy could be made cute, it was Pinkie Pie. Her randomness and outward innocence prevented even the meanest of ponies from being angry with her for more than a few seconds. High maintenance, but probably worth it. Only an insomniac would be able to handle her waking hours.
Finally, there was Fluttershy. She had a special relationship with Rarity, much the same way Rainbow Dash had with Applejack. They'd become best friends in a manner that didn't seem to be more or less important that the relationship they all had with each other and me. Beatifically speaking, Fluttershy and Rarity couldn't be more opposite. Where Rarity's beauty was aided with cosmetics and synthetic designs, Fluttershy was natural. I had to admit that she was even more beautiful than Rarity, however, something about the white mare prevented me from recognising that.
I loved each and every one of those mares in my own way, but I couldn't rightly see a future with any of them, even my sweet Rarity. That revelation hurt the most. All I could do was admire the unique traits all the mares had that I grew to love about them. I knew that even after all but Twilight were dead and gone, I would love them until the end of time, just as Twilight would.
What disturbed me morally was that I also placed Twilight in that category. Chronologically speaking, she would have been the best choice to start an intimate life with, but the fact that she was like a sister to me seemed more like an obstacle than an actual excuse. After all, she was beautiful too. Something about her dexterous nature and her innocent and inexperienced gait was alluring. The thought of another stallion taking her hoof in marriage, whether it be for political gain or true love angered me equally. All these thoughts regarding my closest friends had entered my mind for the past few weeks. I chalked them up to being the source of this strange migraine that travelled in a specific direction. From what I could tell, it wasn't some sort of travelling instinct. I had no impulse to travel in the direction the migraine pointed, so the only logical explanation was that it was related to the dilemma I'd been facing recently.
"Hey Spike! You look troubled, something up?" a familiar voice said. I looked up from the ground and spotted a pale grey-blue pegasus with a strawberry blonde mane and tail fashioned similarly to Rainbow Dash. A lot of Pegasi seemed to have closely resembling styles. Another feature that made Fluttershy Unique. I recognised the Pegasus. A notable feature being her misaligned eyes. It always saddened me somewhat to see her as I knew the torment she got because of those eyes, not to mention the teasing her daughter got.
"Hello, Ditzy. Have you finished your Mail deliveries for the day?" I asked. The Pegasus grinned at me and nodded, landing right in front of me.
"Sure have. I've got some time before School breaks out. Can I join you?" she asked. I gave her a kind smile and shifted along the park bench to give her room. I found myself without anything to do that day and so I decided to just let myself gather my thoughts in the fresh air. What better place than the park?
I patted the bench beside me to indicate for her to sit down. She did so, leaving little room between us. I always liked Ditzy. She wasn't shy around anypony. She leaned into me and sighed contentedly.
"So, my tall draconic friend, what seems to be troubling you?" she asked. Ditzy was by no means stupid. In fact she was rather smart, smarter than most. But her modesty overshadowed that intelligence. Combine that with her poor sight and the clumsiness was like a wrapper. The candy that was her intellect being the treat inside.
"To be honest, I don't know. Over the past month, I've been thinking about my closest friends the same way I think about Rarity." I began.
"So you're falling in love with different aspects of your friends?" she asked. In a way, she was right, but that wasn't the problem. I'd been thinking of my future with them, either individually or as a group, and I just couldn't see it.
"No, that's not it. It's like my mind is preventing me from seeing a romantic future with anypony, like they're not meant for me. Or I'm not meant for them."
"Like you and them are a mismatch?" she offered. She was somewhat right. It was more like something was blocking the match, showing me cons instead of pros.
I sighed wondering what to do. "I've tried to imagine what it would be like with them all, either individually or together, like a herd. But there's nothing. It's like Writer's Block." I said. Ditzy said nothing as she seemed to analyse the information I'd given her.
"Just out of curiosity, was I among those you've considered?" she asked. I could tell she was teasing me, but I wondered how she'd take the answer? Would she be uncomfortable to know I'd thought about her in a romantic sense? Would she be offended? Would she be flattered? Would she be upset that I couldn't see a future with her just like the rest? I decided to just tell the truth. It hadn't led me astray yet.
"Yes. I've thought about you and me. How could I not? You've been such a good friend to me over the years. And I just adore Dinky. But the result is always the same. I see nothing in regards to the future." I watched Ditzy's smile widen as she closed her eyes.
"It's nice to be considered. You're a very sweet dragon, Spike, and I love you very much, just as all your other friends love you. But just as a friend. I'll admit there'd be a lot of advantages to marrying a dragon. Even after I'm dead you'd be able to look out for Dinky, even though she'd be a full grown adult and probably married with kids of her own. Still... You know what I mean?" she asked. I chuckled at her and leaned down to her.
"Well my aged wife, give us a kiss." I teased. She giggled before actually complying with the command. It was a mock kiss between friends, and we knew it. We laughed together before going back to the topic at hand.
"Husband?" she began, eliciting another chuckle from me. "When you say you can't see a future with any of us, do you mean something happens to break apart the relationship as is the standard for such a statement, or is it something else?" she asked. I considered the question and what she meant by it.
"I try to picture it, but all I see is black. I get nothing, no good possibilities turned bad. I try to imagine it and my mind just stops until I give up. Like trying to answer a question, but you can't think beyond the question itself."
"Hmm. Try to picture a future with a dragon." she said.
"What?" I asked, confused by the odd command.
"I'm just guessing, but perhaps it's an instinctual thing. Maybe as you get older, your mind is subconsciously narrowing your field of potential partners to dragons." she said. I thought about it and it made sense. I'd had the urge to join the migration, not just to discover more about my origins, but because it felt like it was bred in me. Maybe this was too. Problem was, I didn't know any dragons.
"I'll try to imagine you as a dragon then see where we go from there." I said. Ditzy giggled.
"Just remember I have a daughter, so make sure the sex isn't loud enough to wake her." she teased. That statement alone caused me to stop everything and just laugh. Ditzy sat up as I lost control of myself and fell on the ground in a fit of laughter. "Is the sex starting now?" she teased further.
After a minute of laughter, I managed to lift myself back onto the bench and smile at her. "Man, I wish you were the exception to this whole ordeal." I said, leaning back on the bench.
"Keep flattering me like this, Spike and I really will fall for you." she said. I pulled her closer and let her lean against me again as I closed my eyes and went back to doing what I was doing before, picturing Ditzy as a dragon. A long, sleek body with grey scales and a golden underbelly, horns and spines. Those amber eyes staring at me. She was smiling at me, blinking a couple of times in that flirtatious manner I'd seen Rarity do with customers. "Getting anything?" Ditzy asked. My smile grew wider as I began to fantasise about me and the draconic Ditzy together, her daughter morphed into a dragon as well. The three of us a happy family.
"Yeah, I'm getting some-OW!" that migraine that pointed in a specific direction suddenly grew in a large burst and broke my fantasy. I grabbed my head and pressed against it as hard as I could, trying to stop my brains from exploding.
"Are you okay?!" Ditzy asked, worry infused into her voice.
I didn't answer at first. The pain in my head was throbbing. It took another ten seconds before it began to subside, and another ten after that for it to return to normal."Y-yeah... just got... blocked by this strange migraine that's been hurting for the past week." I replied.
"Strange how?" she asked.
"No matter which way I turn, the pain seems to stay pointed to a specific direction, like a compass." I replied. Ditzy seemed to consider everything for a moment before sighing.
"Sorry, Spike, but I'm completely stumped. All I can recommend is to wait it out, and avoid fantasising about us pretty mares." she said, leaving me with a grin.
"Very funny." I said with mock anger. She giggled at me and leaned towards my muzzle.
"Bye, husband." she said before giving me another smooch. As she flew off in the direction of the school, I watched her leave. I'd been kissed before, but Ditzy was the first one to ever truly kiss me like that; warm and friendly, but with no true love in it. Pecks on the cheek were normal for me, but a true and genuine kiss on the lips left me wanting. It meant very little in terms of romance, but I wanted romance, just not from anypony I knew.
