Talent Less, Ugly, and Dumb
I'm Scootlaoo, and I have no friends.
I'm in seventh grade, and I don't have a cutie mark. I'm talent less. I used to have friends. Two of them. Applebloom, and Sweetie Belle. We were really close, ever since third grade, when Sweetie Belle and I stood up for Applebloom when she was being bullied by Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
Applebloom and Sweetie Belle got their cutie marks in fifth grade. I was so happy for them, and they were always sure I'd get my cutie mark soon enough after them.
But it's been two years. They went from hopeful, to concerned...to hopeless. And they gave up on me. They tried to help me get my cutie mark, and although they never said it aloud, I'm sure they would say, "Sorry Scootaloo, you're just talent less. We can't be seen around you."
And eventually, I became a third wheel. Then I lost my title as their friends, within a matter of a few months. They added more ponies to their friend group and I was left out. I tried making new friends, but nopony wanted anything to do with me. Not even the most unpopular, ugly, nerds.
I mean, who could want me, anyways? I'm ugly, talent less, and stupid. Nopony would ever want to be friends with me...I don't deserve friends. I'm not meant to be the pretty cheer captain. I'm meant to be the scapegoat, pick-on-foal. There always has to be someone, doesn't there?
Rainbow Dash always tells me I'm beautiful, I'm smart, and my talent will come in time. She just wants me to feel better. I don't believe any of it. But how would she know what I feel?! She always brags about how popular she was all twelve years of school, and how she was the best player on any sport, and how all of the colts lined up for her.
I mean, Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are still nice to me, they aren't like Diamond Tiara or Silver Spoon, but they don't want to hurt my feelings. Whenever I visit them, I feel like I've missed out on so much. And I probably have.
I'm such a loser. I've never kissed a colt- I'm a lip virgin.
I spend most of my time with my parents now, but they're always busy. So I'm usually home alone, where I sit on my bed, with nothing to do, but think about how much I'm missing out on and how I'm so much different than everypony else.
I stick out, and not in a good way. All I want to do is be like everypony else, but nooooo! It's me who has to be constantly bullied and picked on. It's me who only has flaws, and nothing about me is good whatsoever. Nopony wants to talk to me. There goes my personality- it's probably terrible. And my looks- I'm not pretty. And I'm not good at anything, and my flank makes that pretty obvious.
I hate my life, because I'm the definition of flaws. I'm sure if I got a dog, it wouldn't even like me. Nopony really cares about me; they only want to make it look like that so it makes them look like a good pony. They might as well kill me for all I'm worth! Make me into their dinner, because I'm called a chicken all of the time because of my colors and my wings, and my bare flank.
I really have nothing to live for, but yet I still live. Nothing cares about me. Not even myself, I even hate myself. I hate myself for being born. I could kill myself, but then that'd make ponies finally realize that they're being awful, but then I wouldn't be there to laugh into their faces for only then starting to care. But that's not possible. If I kill myself, then they'd be sad, but I wouldn't be there to see them actually care. I wish I could. I'd be dying knowing nopony would care about me until after I die. And that's not what I want, but honestly, am I getting anything I want right now?
I want to to do many terrible things. I want to kill everypony, including myself. I hate everypony, even my parents. I heard them whispering at twelve at night, and they were talking about me.
"Scootaloo...do you really think she's talent less?" My dad asked.
"I don't know. I hope she isn't. Nopony will want to hire her as an employee...with no cutie mark, she's technically useless." My mom whispered back.
"She has to have a talent, right?" Dad asked.
"I don't know...I don't know what to do with her if she never gets a cutie mark, and what happens if she never does? We leave her out on the streets?" Mom replied.
I didn't listen anymore, because I couldn't. It was too much pain. My own parents don't even have faith in me. Nopony has faith in me. I don't even have faith in myself. But my own parents, the ponies that brought me into this world?
I hate them for making me. Why'd they have to make me suffer? It's too much pain to handle...if I don't die from suicide, I'm going to die from stress, and I'm probably am dying it from already.
I've started to lack sleep, and I get so tired, but I can't sleep, and I am so dizzy I can't focus on anything, and my teachers constantly yell at me for lack of attention and even threatened to send me to the office and give me after schools and Saturday schools.
They don't understand! It's not my fault!
I can barely get past passing period, and I usually forget my supplies, I even ask to go to the nurse when I feel sick but they don't believe me and force me to stay in class.
Nopony gives a buck about me. The teachers don't have faith in me- they probably think I'm too dumb to pass seventh grade. I'm that dumb. I still have four and a half years of school left, plus college, and I can't even finish middle school. I'm so dumb, I'm talent less.
At night I just look at Luna's stars, hoping for answers. I've resorted to that. I sometimes pretend they're my friends, because I have no friends, and I desperately wish for friends.
I even heard it to my face by Diamond Tiara.
"Ugh, Scootaloo, you're such a loser! You have no friends, never had a coltfriend, never kissed a colt, you're ugly, and the everypony hates you and you're just a dumb ass!"
I ran off into the mare's bathroom, and cried in a stall. They called for me the entire day to come to the office because they didn't understand why I would be at school for the first three periods, but go missing the next six. When school let out, I didn't even go to my locker, I ran out the school, and when I came back the next day, I was in a ton of trouble. I was issued an in school suspension, but it wasn't a punishment at all. I was separated from all of the dick-heads of ponies.
Maybe I'm just meant to be talent less. Maybe I'm meant to be a loner. Maybe I'm meant to never find love.
I can just be that homeless pony who finds life in the Everfree forest, and there I live the rest of my days.
That's just who I'm meant to be.
