An Equestrian Cold War (Hetalia Crossover)

by IfImRussianthanSoviet

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Crossover
Length: 1982

Not only do the two princesses have issues so do USA and Russia

While the sisters have their problems in Equestria, Russia and America also have some issues to work out together, but because of Brittan's strange magic, Ponies and countries will go to war with each other.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-18 05:12:31 UTC

Chapter One

It was a quiet day in the world that the countries we all know and love reside in, WWII had ended long ago and most of the aftermath was over with, except for one thing, America kept bragging about it. As Russia was walking along to the world conference that was to be held in a few hours he noticed America talking to a group of young ladies, Russia began to listen in to the conversation.

"Wow." a young girl said "I can't believe you took on three countries all by your self." She went on.

"Yah, not only did I defeat the Axis all by my self I landed two big ones on Japan, right in Hiroshima and Nagasaki." America said

Russia began to get frustrated

"And you must be soooooo strong." Another girl said

The girls began to cling on to America.

"But, are you strong where it counts?" The last girl asked.

America let out a chuckle, and before he could respond Russia let his anger get the best of him.

"Shut up America!" he cried out "Stop acting like you did everything in the war, I was there to you know."

"Yahhhhhh, but really what did you do in the war anyways." America replied

Russia, very upset replied "I'll have you know that Hitlers failed invasion on Moscow was a major turning point in the war."

"Oh, I thought the turning point was when I won it for you guys." America responded

Russia began to turn red.

"Well if your just going to be ignorant about it and completely ignore the other world super power you can do that, I don't even care."

Russia then stormed off muttering

"жопа"

as he left towards the conference hall.

*Read in sponge bob narrator voice* TWO AND A HALF HOURS LATER

The wold conference was going smoothly and Russia and Americas little upset between the two of them had been forgotten by the two of them, until some one brought up Communism.

"Communism is a stupid idea!" yelled America.

Russia who wasn't really paying attention at the moment perked right up and stared right at America's blue eyes.

Yah, I'm talking to you stupid Commie." America went on

"Why can't you give your people freedom and Capitalism like I do." America continued.

"Hey, It's a good idea and should work, it's not my job to make sure it runs smoothly" Said Russia.

"Maybe it's because of your *cough* horrible *cough* leaders." Replied America.

"HEY, It's not my fault." Began Russia. "Not only do I have my own nation to run, I have to deal with um-teen republics, Cuba, North Vietnam and Korea, and anything behind the iron curtain."

"Hey I don't care how many people you have, as long as you treat them with freedom like I do." Said America.

Russia angered by this yelled out "At least I didn't judge my people based on skin color, or mass murder my own natives."

A clearly pissed America called out "Well, your just,just stupid, that's what you are!"

"Not as big as you are!" yelled Russia.

America, out of insults used the last thing he could use against Russia.

"You're just jealous because your the sibling that no one cared about!"

The entire room gasped France, one of the most shocked turned to Brittan and asked

"Brittan, you've been with America and Canada the longest, is it true that Russia's a sibling of America?"

Brittan let out a long sigh before he stared to speak "Yes, Russia is Americas brother. I wanted to keep it covered up but now you all know the truth."

Brittan began the back story

"One day when America and Canada were still young I decided to take them on a hike in what would be present day Alaska. It was a nice summer day so we decided to stay out much longer than planned, and we hiked until we reached a lake it seemed. I told America and Canada to play In a field while went out and looked at the nature and local plants in a more wooded area. While i was looking at the wild life I could hear America and Canada yelling and giggling, but then I heard a third voice followed by Canada yelling "Play with us brother." I walked back into the clearing and saw a boy who looked a little older than America swim over to where we were and begin to play with America and Canada. I walked over to the boys and America introduced him as his big brother, I asked who he was and all he said was "I am Russia and I am becoming a crazy big country." He then continued to play with the two boys until sun set, I asked Russia if he wanted to come with us but he just declined and swam back across the water and that was the end of it."

While all of this was being told most of the nations were listening closely, except for America and Russia who were sort of having a full out brawl in the corner of the room, but was later stopped when Germany picked both of them up by the collar of their coats and told them in a calming voice.

"Go out side, we will decide what to do with the two of you while your out there."

Russia and America left the room and slammed the door.

Chapter Two

It was the summer sun celebration in Equestria and Celestia had recently Raised the sun for all of Equestria to see. After completing her simple task she was receiving many praises for her works, especially by handsome stallions.

"The work you do is so beautiful." said the stallion

"Thanks" Celestia responded.

"But not as beautiful as you." The stallion said in a charming voice.

Celestia blushed and said "Hey you don't look two bad your self."

Celestia then gave him a small peck on the cheek.

Luna had witnessed all of this though and fed up with her sister began to go off on her

"What the hell do you think your doing!" she yelled.

She continued her rage "Just because it's your special day doesn't mean you can go acting like your way better than I am."

"Luna stop it" Celestia Said while the Stallion began to walk away to avoid a total chick fight.

"No I won't just stop it" Luna said "I wont stop it until I get recognition for the work I do"

"What work" Celestia said.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT WORK." Luna was furious now "I do twice the work you do, you just handle the sun, while I have to deal with the Moon, the Stars, Meteor showers, and all the constellations, and do I get a day where every one praises my work?, NO!, Do I have handsome stallions talk to me?, NO!, BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DO GET?, I GET IGNORED AND MADE FUN OF BY EVERY ONE FOR BEING YOUR LAME SISTER WHO LIKES TO STAY INSIDE ALL DAY AND HAS LIKE ONE FRIEND WHO"S MOVING AWAY TO SOME TOWN UM-TEEN MILLION MILES AWAY FROM HERE!"

"Luna, calm down" Celestia began "You're just upset that I am the older sibling that every one likes and has wayyyyy more power than you."

Luna yelled out "Well, your just an Ass hole, Celestia"

Celestia proceeded to bitch slap Luna across the face.

Some one then yelled out "STOP IT GIRLS!"

It was the sisters mother, rolling along in her wheel chair nearing her end.

"I'm going to be gone soon and I don't want my last memories of you two to be bad ones of you fighting, So go to your rooms, NOW!"

"BUTTTT MOOOOOM, this is all Luna's fault make her go to her room not me."

Their mom responded "Did I fucking stutter."

"Yes mother." Both of the princesses replied.

Both Luna and Celestia stormed off to their room but they were both having different feelings.

Anger filled Celestia though to her self "Stupid Luna, I could have had that boy, if only you didn't screw it up."

Luna was on the brink of tears and thought nothing until she finally had gotten to her room and jumped on her bed. She then began to let out tears. "Why can't every one like me as much as Celestia." She said to her self. "Why won't any one begin to recognize every thing I do and start to like me." I just want one good friend who will stay with me forever." she went one. She then began to cry into her pillow and let it all out.

"Why can't I find some one special." Luna said before she silenced her self realizing Celestia could probably hear her.

Luckily though in Celestia's room she didn't hear and was just sitting on her bed and beating her pillow pretending it was her sister. hopefully this situation will eventually get better for the two of them, hopefully.

Chapter Three

Russia and America were having a different time then Luna was, Other than feeling sad or depressed both of the two countries were like Celestia. Pissed off, but Russia did feel a bit like Luna deep down inside, but his anger powered over powered it.

The two countries were sitting in the hall way staring at each other and occasionally making pouting noises at each other. this eventually stopped when Italy Ran out into the hall and with a little smile on his face said

"Russia and America the other countries want you." and then ran off in his own happy little world.

Russia and America then walked into the room and looked at all the other countries and noticed Brittan in an unusual attire, Russia and America recognized it fairly quickly though as it was the cloak Brittan wore when he did black magic.

Germany began to talk to Russia and America

"Russia and America, we have no idea what to do with you. You fight like this all the time and the other nations and I decided it would be best to send you some where calm and peaceful where you two can bond together and become friends like you were during WWII."

"Where would that place be." Said America a little confused.

"We Really didn't want to do this." Began Germany "But we decided to let Brittan send you to one of his magical realms that he apparently has friends in."

"WAAAAAAAAAHHHHH." America and Russia cried out.

"Hey!" Brittan butted in "I do have friends there, and IT IS magical." "Russia and America." Brittan went on "When I send you to this place you wont be able to leave until you've stopped fighting."

"Wait!" Russia yelled out "Who will watch our countries while were gone."

"Oh I've made arrangements." Brittan said with a smile.

"I"M FINALLY A COUNTRY, I GET TO CONTROL THE USA AND THE USSR." was heard from the hallway.

Brittan began to laugh "As you can tell I've let Sealand control both of your nations so get back quick."

Before Russia and America could respond they were pushed onto a strange figure on the floor by Germany and Brittan opened his book and began to read.

"Sicut etiam legitur de vobis bet hoc est graviter legere leges condicionesque nemo hunc etiam si miseris sequar te tiari"

The floor began to light up

"MANNULUS meus, mea MANNULUS Ahh, ahh, ahh, mea MANNULUS ahh ... Mirabar, quid in amicitia mea MANNULUS Donec sit amet erat omnibus ex magno usu me cum tons of fun pulchra et fortis corde fidelis, Socius misericordiam; Tamque facile integris Praesent id justo meum es tu omnes nostis amici optimi mannis?"

After the final words were spoken a strange force sucked up the two countries.

"Holy shit." France began "It worked."