Evil Renegade Shepard Hurts Ponies' Feelings

by Bendy

Rating: mature
Tags: Science Fiction, Comedy, Crossover, Sex, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Human, Main 6
Length: 1252

Evil Renegade Commander Shepard is teleported into Equestria, where he hurts ponies' feelings in Ponyville and does not have sex with them.

Evil Renegade Commander Shepard is teleported into Equestria, where he hurts ponies' feelings in Ponyville and does not have sex with them.

Should not be taken seriously.

Published 2014-06-05 14:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-05 14:40:01 UTC

Renegade Points For No Human And Pony Sex

Flying through space, there was a spaceship known as the Normandy. On board the spaceship was Commander Shepard the human, whom was being a dick as usual to his crew by hurting their feelings for no reason. The fate of the entire galaxy depended on this man stopping the Reapers, but being a jerk and getting drunk at bars was more important to this man to stopping the Reapers.

Currently he wore his iconic black N7 power armor as he lay on his bed while shouting at the sexy blue alien babe known as Liara T'soni.

"Get the fuck out of my room you ugly blue bitch! I don't want to have sex with you anymore."

She ran out of the room crying while Shepherd smiled as he gained more renegade points due to rejecting her.

This human was such a cunt he had horrible red scars across his face and glowing red eyes, due to how much renegade points obtained from being an evil bastard. Strangely enough his favorite TV show was My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. Yes, he was a Brony, but not the good kind. For he was so evil he wasn't even a Clopper. Cloppers, like normal people masturbated to the sexy ponies. Not clopping to ponies was heresy, as a result Commander Shepard was a heretic for not finding pony pussy sexy, which made him especially evil, yet he's the one to save us from the evil Reapers.

Instead of perfect My Little Pony Porn, Shepard masturbated to boring normal human porn, unlike the glorious master fans known as Cloppers, that masturbated to superior My Little Pony porn. He also had no waifu nor hubando. This human was truly evil incarnate.

There was a blinding flash of light, followed by the disappearance of the evil cunt. Unfortunately this bastard was flung across time and space through the multiverse.

He reappeared on a grassy hill just outside Ponyville. He was now in the land of sexy pastel ponies, many of which had a human fetish.

Within seconds a sexy flying rainbow pony came down from the sky, she flapped her wings just above him as she looked at him with bedroom eyes.

"Hey, Shepard! Do you want to cum inside me, Rainbow Dash?!"

Shepard stood up to glare angrily at her.

"No! I don't want to cum inside Rainbow Dash!" he shouted.

Rainbow Dash gasped in shock with a hoof over her mouth. "Human, what do you mean you don't want to cum inside me Rainbow Dash?!"

"You're ugly and I don't want to cum inside you!"

Dashie stared at him with her jaw dropped as tears began to form in her eyes.

"But... I'm Rainbow Dash..... " she began in a low voice. "I've got one of the most sexy pony pussies in the multiverse. How could you not want to cum inside me?!"

"Because I don't have a pony fetish!"

"You must be one of those mean non clopper Bronies! Go away, I hate you! How could you not want to cum inside me?! You just missed out on the best sex of your life! For Human and pony sex is best sex!"

"Shut up you ugly rainbow horse!" he shouted.

Dashie wailed in grief as she covered her face with her hooves. With that Shepard walked away with a big smile on his face as Rainbow Dash continued to cry from being rejected. With a joyful skip in his step he made his way to a certain cottage just outside Ponyville, where a lovely sweethearted pony lived.

As he made his way to the cottage he came across an innocent, cute little grey kitten on the dirt path. He raised his foot, but fortunately his renegade points weren't high enough for him to kill the kitten.

"You got lucky!" he grumbled.

Unfortunately, his renegade points were high enough for the next evil thing he was about to do. He knocked on the door, within seconds a shy, beautiful pegasus peeked her head out of the door.

"Oh, hello there handsome human. What brings you---

The cold hearted man slapped her across the face, which caused the mare to cry.

"Shut up you ugly pony! I hate you!" he shouted.

Fluttershy slammed the door shut and then she lay down on the floor as she began to flood her home with her own tears.

Shepard laughed evilly as he got a massive amount of renegade points. Now with such renegade points he could hurt many more ponies' feelings in the worst way possible.

With a nasty grin on his face he made his way to Ponyville. Any pony that came near him he slapped them away and made them cry.

His next victim was in the market place selling apples at a stall.

"Howdy there sugar cube." Shepard just stared at her with a evil smile. "You sure a handsome looking fella!" said Applejack as she gave him a warm smile. "Want to try one of my apples for free?"

"No you a ugly, imbred stupid piece of shit!"

Applejack just stared up at him with her jaw dropped.

"What did you say?!" she shouted.

"I said you're a ugly, imbred, stupid piece of shit!"

Applejack lunged at him, tackling him to the ground her face filled with rage. Just when she was about to slam her hooves into his face Shepard had pulled out a pistol, which he pointed at her with his eyes narrowed angrily.

"Get the fuck off me, you ugly horse! Or I'll kill you!"

Applejack stepped off him with a look of fear in her eyes.

"...Please, don't shoot." she said in a low voice as tears began to form in her eyes.

"You're lucky my renegade points aren't high enough. Otherwise you be dead you dumb ugly horse."

When Applejack began crying Shepard smiled as he got more renegade points. He made his way through Ponyville to reach his next victim. He knocked on the door to the Carousel Boutique, moments later a sexy white unicorn answered.

"You are ugly and no human would ever want to cum inside you!" he shouted.

Rarity cried as she slammed the door shut and began flooding her home with her own tears.

Shepard was overjoyed as he felt the evil dark renegade points pour into his body. He didn't even have to make his way to his next victim, his victim came to him.

"Hey, do you want to be my friend?!" said Pinkie Pie coming out from nowhere.

"No! I don't want to be your friend!" he shouted.

Pinkie Pie ran away crying.

His mission was almost complete. He now made his way to his last victim.

***

The beautiful, young, purple alicorn pony princess known as Twilight Sparkle stood at the center of the library downstairs with her eyes narrowed.

Suddenly the front door opened, followed by evil renegade Shepard walking in.

"Ah, Renegade Shepard. I've been expecting you."

"Huh?"

"Your evil ends here!"

Evil Shepard felt something tap his shoulder, when evil Shepard turned around he saw Paragon Shepard glaring at him angrily with a shot gun pointing at him.

With that Shepard gained a massive amount of paragon points from killing the evil renegade Shepard.

"We'll bang, okay?" said Paragon Shepard sexfully.

"We'll bang." Twilight replied sensually as she looked at him with bedroom eyes.

And then Paragon Shepard had sex with everypony to cheer them up.

The End