Operation: Schoolhouse
This fan-fiction is made purely for entertainment. NOTHING MORE.
“Make sure the timers are set correctly,” said the white little unicorn filly known as Sweetie Belle. “I don’t want them to go off too early or too late. They have to be perfect.”
“I know what I’m doing!” Scootaloo, a young, orange pegasus, snapped. “If you want to arm these, you do them!” Scootaloo’s tolerance was very low right now. She, like both of her friends, was incredibly nervous for the day ahead.
“Quit arguing you two,” Applebloom yelled from her table. “We all have to be ready for school today.” she added mischievously. The two other fillies giggled at their friend’s ironic joke. “We need to make sure we look over the blueprints of the school before we leave. And we need to review the game plan one more time.”
“Ugh,” Scootaloo groaned. “We’ve been through the plan at least ten times already! I know what to do!”
“Applebloom’s right,” Sweetie Belle said reassuringly. “We need to make sure everything is perfect before we start.”
Scootaloo groaned again. “Fine. I’ll finish setting the timers later. Let’s get on with this.” Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo sat down next to Applebloom at the table. The table was set near the window of their clubhouse so they could see anypony coming and hide their plans if need be.
“Let’s go over the time table.” Applebloom started. She glanced at the clock that hung on the adjacent wall. “It’s 8:30 now, so we’ve got another half hour before school starts.”
“But if we aren’t in class, won’t Cheerilee go looking for us? Or at least call our parents?” Scootaloo asked.
“Already taken care of!” Applebloom boasted proudly. “Ah got all of us notes saying that we were sick today. Granny Smith will sign pretty much anything if Ah say it’s for school. And she can’t read anything without her glasses."
"Which may or may not have been destroyed maliciously..." Sweetie Belle added.
"Now, back onto our plan. We keep on preparing until 11:40, then we head over to the schoolhouse. At 12:00, we plant those babies.” Applebloom gestured towards the work table were Scootaloo had previously been working. “We set them in the school’s cafeteria. What time are they set to go off?”
“Around 12:30. They should all go off only a few seconds apart.” Scootaloo replied.
“Great.” Applebloom continued. “12:30 is the biggest lunch period. Most of the students will be eating lunch.”
“But what about the kids who decide to eat outside?” Sweetie Belle inquired. Applebloom’s face contorted into a mischievous grin.
The yellow little filly stood up from her chair and trotted over towards the corner of the clubhouse. She tapped her hoof carefully around the floor, looking for the false floorboard. At last she found it and carefully removed the plank of wood. “That’s what these are for.” she said proudly, gesturing for her friends to come look. The other two fillies looked over Applebloom’s shoulder and nearly started to salivate.
“I want the biggest one!” Scootaloo yelled.
“Not fair! That’s the one I wanted!” Sweetie Belle countered, her voice cracking like usual.
Applebloom slowly dipped down into the hidden compartment and scooped up one of the items. It was heavy in her hooves, and it still needed to be loaded. “Don’t worry girls,” she started. “They all do what they’re meant to do.” The three friends snickered.
“Now we’ve got to get back on track before we miss our opportunity.” Applebloom stated, trotting back towards the table. “Now, after 12:30, there will still be some classes in session. We should be able to take care of most of the colts and fillies outside before we move into the school and get any of the remaining ponies in there. The lunchroom should be all taken care of, so we don’t need to worry about that. And even for the ones that do make it out, we can still blast them when they exit the building.” Applebloom’s wicked smile returned to her face. “And we can’t forget about Miss Cheerilee’s class, can we?” Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo snickered again.
“I can’t wait until Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara get a muzzle full of this puppy!” Scootaloo said, brandishing her item retrieved from the compartment.
“Oh come on!” Sweetie Belle shouted, clearly upset. “First you get the big one, now you get to do in Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara!? That’s SO not fair!”
“Ugh,” Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Fine, you can get those two. But I still get the big one!”
“Okay you two, let’s load these babies before it’s too late. Come on Crusaders!” Applebloom extended her hoof into the air to be greeted by two more. They all jumped up and high-hooved in excitement. It was the first time they were excited for school.
* * *
As 12 o’clock finally rolled by, the Cutie Mark Crusaders loaded their duffle bags full of their tools for today’s project. Each filly had two black duffel bags filled to the brim with their utensils. They were heavy, but the friends seemed to be filled with adrenaline. Applebloom kept on making morbid jokes she overheard Big Macintosh telling to Braeburn the last time he was in town. Scootaloo couldn’t stop her wings from buzzing as she walked towards the school. And Sweetie Belle couldn’t stop humming “Janies Got a Gun” by Aerosmith.
As they neared the school, they heard the bell go off, indicating the end of the period. When the school was finally into view, the three could see a few fillies and colts sitting around the school grounds getting their sack lunches ready. They were slightly behind schedule, so they quickly hid half of their duffel bags and walked towards the cafeteria entrance. Before they made it to the room full of children eating their lunch, a young, white pony walked up in front of the three.
“Well hi der Applebloom.” Twist said with her heavy lisp. “I didn’t sthee you in clasth today. What are you doing withh those bags?” The Crusaders ignored her, and continued on. Before the passed Twist completely, Applebloom turned to the young filly and spoke.
“Go on home Twist,” Applebloom said, her voice void of emotion. “Some real heavy stuff's about to go down.” Twist tried to speak to Applebloom again, but received no reply. Twist was very confused by her friend’s behavior, but had not known Applebloom for being a liar. She decided that she could head home early and catch up tomorrow.
The Crusaders entered the cafeteria almost completely unnoticed. A few ponies saw them enter, but thought nothing of it. The three friends went separate ways throughout the lunchroom, each secretly dropping their bags in various places. They all made eye contact with each other, and nodded. They exited the lunchroom just as unnoticed.
They found the tree where they had hidden their other tools. They waited impatiently for 12:30 to hit. The seconds felt like hours to them. They were giddy with emotions and excitement. They had been thoughtful enough to bring along a clock to gauge the time. The second hand clicked repetitively, nearly driving the three into a frenzy. Tick, after tick, the clock ticked on. The pressure they felt in the air was like a balloon that was about to burst. With only a minute remaining, the ponies dug into their respective duffel bags, each brandishing their heavy tool. They loaded their items with loud *cha-chig* sounds. They had brought hours worth of ammo along with them. They were certainly going to have their fun. The clock ticked, and ticked, and ticked, and ticked, until, finally, they heard an extremely loud sound, echoed by the shouts and screams of children.
“GO GO GO!” Applebloom yelled at the top of her voice. The three friends turned from their cover behind the tree and soon spotted several ponies who seemed confused by the loud sound. The three aimed, and fired at the first group of ponies eating lunch they could see. The victims were struck instantly, and they fell to the ground. They readjusted their aim, and fired again at more children, who had just begun to understand what was happening around them. All of the targets of the three fillies fell to the ground, a dark and warm liquid surrounding them. This whole time, the Crusaders were grinning vigorously.
Those remaining from the lunchroom assault slowly stumbled out of the cafeteria, dazed by what had just happened. They were greeted by more fire from the three little fillies. More and more children tried to flee from the assault on their school, only to be thrown to the ground like the rest of their classmates. The Crusaders looked around the exterior of the building, looking for anypony who had not been hit yet. After they found none, they moved into the school.
Multiple students and teachers had entered the hallway to see what all of the ruckus was about. It was a huge mistake. The girls had reloaded their items, and were now ready for another huge burst of fire. The helpless students and teachers were hit unbiasedly. Tall, short, young, old, unicorn, pegasi, earth pony, all alike were under fire by the three young girls. It seemed that the girls were in luck, for Cheerilee had not left her classroom, and they expected her to still be in her room. They neared the door, ready to begin the assault on their very own classroom. They were still jittery with adrenaline pumping through their veins.
The door was unlocked as expected. They casually walked into their usual place of learning. Almost all of the children were cooped up under their desks, scared by the fear of not knowing what was going on outside of their classroom door. The three friends smiled, almost mocking the scared children. None of the three culprits could seem to find Miss Cheerilee, however they continued with the plan anyway.
“Alright y’all,” Applebloom locked and loaded the item in her hooves. “Who’s gunna be first?”
* * *
Cheerilee was not very curious when the group of three friends had all called in sick. They almost always spent their time with each other, so if one got sick, usually the others would get sick aswell. What made Cheerilee curious, was the sight of the three “sick” fillies walking towards the school, each with a large black duffel bag. However she was in the middle of a lecture, and could not simply stop to investigate. After a couple of minutes, she saw them again walking away from the school, this time without the bags. Cheerilee had finished her lecture, so she told the kids to read quietly while she stepped out of class for a moment.
She stepped out of the classroom to try to find the three fillies who may have decided to skip class. She walked outside of the schoolhouse in search for the Crusaders. She briefly looked about the playground in search of the girls. After no such luck, she started walking in the direction she thought she had seen the fillies go. She trotted briskly, not knowing the horrible event that was about to unfold. Not even after two minutes of walking, Cheerilee was stopped by an extremely loud sound. She debated in her head either to turn back to investigate this new phenomenon, or to continue the search for the three girls. But the sound of children screaming made up her mind. She turned back towards the school at full gallop, unsure of the situation that was unfolding.
When the schoolhouse was finally in view again, all she could see was fillies and colts on the ground, and the three missing fillies firing directly into the school. Cheerilee was at a loss for words. She wanted to yell out to find out what was happening, but couldn’t find her voice. The three fillies moved into the school, and Cheerilee started to run again. More screams and shouts were emitted from the school as Cheerilee neared it. She couldn’t stop to help the already victimized ponies, because she knew she needed to reach her classroom before the Crusaders did.
When the pink school teacher entered the building, she nearly ran away. Teachers and student alike were hit by the assault from the young fillies. Cheerilee forced herself to walk through the puddles of warm liquid, slowly making it towards the classroom. She could hear various shouts and replies from her room, but couldn’t make out specifics. When she was nearly at the doorway, she heard a pony begging for mercy. She could easily tell it was Diamond Tiara.
“Please Scootaloo! I’m so sorry! I never meant to hurt your feelings! Please don’t do this to me!” the young filly begged.
“Sorry little miss priss, you deserve this more than anypony.” Scootaloo replied with a near sadistic tone. Cheerilee heard Diamond Tiara scream, and ran through the open doorway. The sight of her classroom in disarray was terrifying to her. Multiple fillies and colts were drenched in water. Some were amused by this act, while others (like Silver Spoon) were not happy by being soaked by the barrage of water guns.
“UGH!” Diamond Tiara screamed. “I JUST GOT MY MANE DONE!” The pink pony was dripping water, and her mane was a mess. Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Applebloom couldn't stop laughing. The three noticed Miss Cheerilee in their peripheral vision, and turned to face their teacher.
“Oh, hi Miss Cheerilee!” the three Crusaders said in unison. They all aimed their water guns at their teacher, and opened fire once again. “HAPPY APRIL FOAL’S DAY!”
The now soaked Cheerilee was unsure if she should laugh or be angry, so she decided on being both.
* * *
Cheerilee had decided to be merciful, and did not expel the three misfits. They simply earned two years of detention each, one year for their assault with the water guns and one year for the water balloon bombs in the cafeteria. And they also had to spend the next three days cleaning up the mess that they had made. In the end, the three decided that it was still the best April Foal’s Day ever.
Author’s Note: I know it’s a little late for an April Fool’s fic, but I got the idea and said; “WHY THE BUCK NOT!?” If you guys really want me to, I could probably make this like it was a real school shooting fic. That was actually my first plan, but I thought it would be way too morbid for most people’s taste. And I thought that it wouldn't help my sanity either. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this simple fic, and have a nice day Y’all!
