Beauty Costs

by Cafe Ponies

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy
Length: 2381

After Twilight accidentally strikes Rarity with the want-it need-it spell, Rarity loses all of her peace and quiet to stallions stalking her.

When Twilight looks through her spell book one day and sees the want-it need-it spell again, she is reminded of her Smarty Pants doll. Trying to take her mind off of it, she attempts to do the spell again to relive the moment and cure herself, confused as to what she should do, but when Rarity walks into her library, Twilight is distracted for a moment. The spell backfires, striking Rarity. Strangely, the spell does not work for mares this time, but it works on stallions, causing them to stalk Rarity. Irritated, Rarity will do whatever it takes to get her peace and quiet once more.

I made the cover art myself. Not so good, is it?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-08 20:52:54 UTC

Beauty Costs

  Twilight flipped through her spell book, absent-minded. Spike was busy rushing up and down the stairs, bringing books down that delivery Pegasi had left on the roof rather than the front steps. Twilight was too busy to do this herself, so the sensible choice would be to make Spike do all of this himself. But she realized she wasn't that busy later on, and since she didn't want to help Spike, she was looking at the pages of her spell book.

  "Twilight...please...just help me carry one stack?! Come on, it's not fair, you have magic!" Spike complained as he wobbled down the stairs again, his entire body obscured by his biggest pile of books he had brought down yet.

  Twilight shook her head, focusing on the spells she was viewing. "No, Spike, I'm too busy," she lied, even though she obviously wasn't. Spike rolled his eyes as she flipped through more pages.

  "I really don't get how you're the Element of Magic or the Princess of Friendship at all," Spike said, putting down the books in the even bigger pile near the front door. He furiously stomped back up the stairs.

  "Spike, just finish bringing those books down! I don't have all day for this, you know," she said.

  Spike was already walking back down the stairs, his face hidden again. "It seems like you do," he groaned irritably.

  "Just...hurry up. You're so lazy," Twilight replied, being a massive hypocrite at the moment.

  "I'm lazy?" Spike said as he carelessly dropped the smaller pile of books. He walked sluggishly back up the steps, looking dull with his slow speed and repeated routine of walking up and down the stairs.

  Twilight sighed in response. She flipped to the next page again, but she froze and jumped slightly and noticed a certain spell.

  "The want-it need-it spell!" she exclaimed, alarmed.

  Spike looked at Twilight. He said the same thing as when Snips and Snails called Trixie the "G&PT". "The what?"

  "The want-it need-it spell," Twilight repeated, rolling her eyes as she turned to look at her assistant. She reacted the same way to Spike's confusion as she would if somepony didn't understand what trotting was, or what a paradox in Equestria that could summon changelings and do more mind blowing actions was. "The spell I used on Smarty Pants."

  "Oh, yeah, right," Spike said, resting for a moment.

  "NO RESTING!" Twilight yelled angrily, making Spike jump.

  "Err, y-yes ma'am!" the purple dragon stammered in fear as he sped back upstairs.

  Twilight sighed in relief, but that disappeared instantly when she saw the spell again. She received chaotic memories of when she had used the spell on Smarty Pants. She thought she could get over it if she could use it again.

  "No, don't," Twilight warned herself cautiously. She closed the book, but the spell was stuck in her head. "Fine."

  The alicorn's horn developed an aura around it, a sparkly magenta color. Luckily, Spike was still conveniently upstairs, so Twilight wouldn't strike him. He didn't deserve attention or love, according to Twilight. But another distraction hit her.

  Rarity opened the door, not knocking at all. "Twilight! Hello darling!" she called happily.

  Twilight looked at Rarity for a moment. She jumped, and the spell abruptly flew towards Rarity. It hit her, throwing the mare off of her hooves.

  Smoke escaped from Twilight's horn, the tip of it singed. She ignored this, though. Twilight rushed over to her fallen friend.

  Rarity got up and threw a hoof to her forehead, speaking dramatically. "Oh dear, I am ever so grateful this injury is not fatal!" She proceeded to fall back the other way into Twilight's hooves. She fell over. Rarity got up, dusted herself off, and said, "Goodness, Twilight. You need better catching skills."

  Twilight heaved herself up as well. "Excuse me, but I just used a spell that hit you." Rarity looked at her friend's singed horn, which was still emitting smoke from it, and rolled her eyes anyways.

  "Well, anyways, do you need a new dress for the Gala?" Rarity queried, fixing her mane and tail with her own weaker magic.

  "Yes. Well, I'm busy now," Twilight groaned.

  "Okay, dear. It will be ready soon!" Rarity said excitedly as if none of this ever happened.

  "Be careful out there though. I just used the want-it need-it spell on you, the same one that I used on Smarty Pants," Twilight explained. She pushed Rarity outside.

  "Okay, darling," Rarity said carelessly. Twilight closed the door as Rarity returned to her boutique.

  Rarity stepped into her boutique, ready to make her friend another spectacular dress for the Gala. As she scanned the room for fabric, Fluttershy abruptly came in without knocking. Of course she was the Element of Kindness. But then again, Rarity didn't knock either.

  "H-Hello, Rarity," Fluttershy greeted the white unicorn in her usual shy and quiet voice.

  "Hello, dear! Do you need a dress for the Gala too?" Rarity said, returning the greeting.

  "Oh, yes. I was just going to request it."

  "Well, no need. It's already finished."

  Rarity levitated a beautiful green dress specked with flowers over to Fluttershy. The animal caretaker gasped at the sight, and she grabbed the dress.

  "It looks beautiful!" she complimented.

  Rarity smiled as she returned to working on Twilight's dress. Fluttershy approached her.

  "So, you're making yourself a d-dress too?" Fluttershy queried, looking at Rarity swiftly working on the dress.

  "Yes, dear," Rarity confirmed. Another knock was heard on the door. The two mares looked at it.

  "Could you...get that?" Rarity asked.

  "Umm, okay," Fluttershy said, walking back to the door. She opened it, only to find a stallion there. "Err, hello."

  The stallion stared past Fluttershy at Rarity. "I want to talk to Rarity..." he said dreamily, sighing afterwards.

  "Well...okay," Fluttershy said awkwardly, backing up and stopping once she was at Rarity's side. She shook slightly.

  The stallion approached the two mares. Then, he unexpectedly leaned in towards Rarity quickly. "Hello, my love," he said.

  Rarity flashed a glance of total confusion and disbelief at Fluttershy, then back at the stallion. "...Love?" she echoed.

  "Yes, you didn't know that I loved you?" the stallion asked.

  "Err, no. Umm..." Rarity said. She always wanted ponies like Prince Blueblood to love her, but this was just awkward.

  "Should I leave?" Fluttershy said anxiously, avoiding looking at the stallion as much as possible.

  "No!" Rarity said. She didn't want to be left alone with this creepy stallion. "Oh Celestia no, don't leave. Don't leave!" she went on, ignoring that the stallion was still there. She guessed the stallion was too absorbed in her beauty.

  Fluttershy sighed, then trotted to the back of the room. Her mane fell in front of her face, which, luckily for her, shielded her eyes from the stallion. But the stallion wouldn't be interested in her anyways, as his gaze was never leaving Rarity's face.

  Rarity backed up, bumping into the wall. She galloped over to Fluttershy's side fearfully. "Let's go see Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy," she said nervously.

  "Oh, I'll see you later then..." the stallion said sadly as he approached the two mares. He turned around, leaving the boutique.

  The two mares both let out sighs of relief once the stallion had trotted outside. They flashed uncertain glances at each other, and instantly rushed outside afterwards. Fluttershy put Rarity on her back, and sped up into the sky towards Rainbow Dash's house, even though she was slowed down by Rarity's weight on her back.

  Fluttershy and Rarity entered Rainbow Dash's house after they both finally knocked. Rainbow Dash closed the door behind them after letting them in, and smiled at them.

  "Hiya, girls," Rainbow Dash greeted them.

  "Rainbow Dash, there's a stallion after Rarity," Fluttershy assumed quickly.

  "Well, not after me! Just...wanting to talk to me but I don't know him and he's creepy," Rarity said, her words gushing out of her mouth like a waterfall due to her anxiety.

  "And you're not liking it? Rarity, you always wanted stallions to fall for you, and you always make yourself as beautiful as possible," Rainbow Dash pointed out, rolling her eyes and groaning.

  "That's what I thought, but now that it's actually happening, aside from using my beauty to trick stallions into giving Fluttershy the last bundle of asparagus like when she met Iron Will, and even though I didn't like it when Prince Blueblood treated me like that, I don't like this," Rarity said.

  Fluttershy shook her head quickly, while Rainbow Dash simply spoke in confusion. "What?"

  "Oh, whatever!" Rarity exclaimed.

  "So, what do you want me to do?" Rainbow Dash asked.

  "Keep that stallion away from me," Rarity said.

  "Fine," Rainbow Dash sighed.

  Rarity trotted towards the door and opened it, with Fluttershy following her closely. But the two mares gasped, frightened, when they saw another stallion. The Pegasus was flapping his wings, simply hovering in front of them.

  "Hello, Rarity," he said in that same hypnotized tone as the other stallion.

  "Hello...?" Rarity echoed in return. She looked at Fluttershy worriedly, and the yellow mare nodded.

  Rarity heaved herself up onto Fluttershy's back again, and she spread her wings. After a short, but swift, gallop, she jumped off of the edge of the clouds, flying away from the stallion.

  "WAIT FOR ME!" Rainbow Dash yelled in an ear-shattering voice.

  The Wonderbolt fan sped after the two mares racing off, but the stallion followed them. He wasn't very fast, but Rainbow Dash remembered Rarity's request to keep that one stallion away from her. She might as well stop this one too. Being the fast mare that she was, Rainbow Dash kicked clouds in front of the stallion so he got slowed down by them, at least. After he eventually got tangled up in the jumble of clouds Rainbow Dash blocked him with, the cyan Pegasus flew after her friends.

  Sweet Apple Acres quickly came into view below due to its large size. Fluttershy dived down, slowing down, then landed. Rarity got off of her friend's back just as Rainbow Dash crashed beside them. Dust flew up from the ground. The winged pony got up, balancing herself, then she shook her head. They all headed towards the barn, across the large area of apple trees.

  Eventually, after a lot of trotting and sweating, the three exhausted and panting mares entered the barn. Applejack was inside, storing buckets of apples in corners. Applebloom was helping her, while Big Mac was moving bales of hay around. Granny Smith was slowly trotting down the stairs.

  "Hello, Applejack!" Rarity said as she walked over to the orange mare.

  "Oh! Howdy, ya'll," Applejack exclaimed excitedly. Applebloom trotted over to the farmer's side.

  Granny Smith was already at the bottom of the stairs, slowly trotting towards them. She was a fast mare. Big Mac looked up, but when he saw Rarity, he looked like he was hypnotized, just like the two other stallions. Rarity noticed this, and crept back to hide behind Rainbow Dash.

  "...Rarity? What are you doing?" Rainbow Dash said, dazed.

  "Big Mac...is acting like...the other stallions..." Rarity whispered carefully.

  Rainbow Dash flashed a swift look at Big Mac. She jumped back. "Gah!" He was creeping towards them with an uncomfortably-wide smile. Fluttershy noticed this too, and she gasped as she also stepped back.

  The three frightened mares huddled close together with each other. Applejack gave them confused looks, then she looked at Big Mac. She rushed over to her friends, trembling slightly.

  "RUN!" Rarity shouted as she took off from the barn. Fluttershy swiftly followed, and Rainbow Dash sped ahead of them quickly. Applejack was quickly on their heels as well.

  Big Mac was steadily following them, his pace never slowing, but always quickening. This frightened Rarity so much that she was almost ahead of Rainbow Dash slightly. Fluttershy flapped her wings so fast that it was nearly invisible, and it was too hard to catch every movement. She soared up, flying just a little bit behind Rainbow Dash. Either today Rainbow Dash was slow, or the day suddenly made the two mares fast.

  Applejack swerved around multiple apple trees, guiding Rarity around them to avoid her getting her pretty face hit by them. But the stallions would still follow her.

  After a long time, the apple trees finally cleared away and Ponyville was looming into view, growing bigger as they got closer. Sugarcube Corner was as clear as day. The mares headed there, seeking help from Pinkie Pie as Big Mac crashed into many apple trees due to his excessive attention to Rarity and her beauty. But he was never injured, as he was a strong stallion with strong and fast hooves, and he would never stop unless they did, just to see Rarity.

  The group of ponies pushed each other inside hurriedly, frantically bumping into each other as they crashed through the front doors.

  "Hi, girls!" Pinkie Pie greeted them from the counter, a broad smile on her face. Her eyes were wide and cheerful as she waved rapidly at the pile of groaning, exhausted mares.

  "Pinkie Pie, we need help," Rainbow Dash began for the three other resting mares, gliding over to the cupcake-loving pony.

  "Cake?" Pinkie Pie asked.

  "No, Rarity has a lot of stallions following her. Three, so far. She wants them gone," Rainbow Dash explained, panting heavily afterwards. She landed.

  "Oh, okay! Lure them away with candy and sweets, then! Nopony can resist it, especially Sugarcube Corner's!" Pinkie Pie suggested happily. Her recommendation put hope in Rainbow Dash and the three other mares that were listening near the front doors. It also seemed like Big Mac was gone, as he didn't try to crash through or open the doors, or just come in at all.

  "They'll be too absorbed in Rarity's beauty," Applejack pointed out between deep breaths.

  "Yes," Rarity agreed.

  "But nopony can resist Sugarcube Corner's cupcakes!" Pinkie Pie argued, already becoming irritated.

  Flutterrshy was watching the doors as the three mares got into an intense argument, Rainbow Dash gliding around in boredom, listening to the arguing ponies. The doors were still, and there was no sound coming from outside. There was no way that Big Mac or the other stallions were gone.