Then Tomorrow Came

Chapters

Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Epilogue
Chapter 1
Chapter 10
Edits and Sequel Information

Chapter 2

Twilight quickly clamped down on the feeling of sickness rising in her stomach and forced her slacking lungs to continue drawing breath. She might have been devastated, but this was neither the time nor the place to fall to pieces. That would have to wait until she got home. Right now she was here to support Dash during an important moment in her life and she was not going to ruin it with something as trivial as the apocalyptic destruction of all her hopes and dreams.

Being silently thankful that she was still in shock enough to not yet have any tears to fight back, she began damage control. First to deal with was the look of shock no doubt plastered across her face. This was a surprise announcement, so surprise was an acceptable response. She could run with this. She began searching for some words to make some kind of response beyond standing there and gawking like an idiot. They would expect her to say something. Preferably something technically true so she wouldn't have to lie to the mare of her dreams and the element of honesty standing next to her. That eliminated pretty much anything along the line of "I'm happy for you". Fortunately, the others bought her some precious time to compose her thoughts.

"This is just fantastic darlings! I must say you do make quite the perfect couple. I've always hoped you two might get together. Oh you simply must let me make you some matching outfits! I'm thinking an earth and sky motif. Oh this is going to be fabulous!"

"Oh my, I mean, this is just so wonderful. I'm so happy for you both."

"Wow. I can certainly say I wasn't expecting that." Twilight said with more sincerity than she had ever said anything in her life. "Congratulations." There it was. Short, simple, socially appropriate, and without a true or false value. Twilight mentally breathed a sigh of relief.

"I know I was surprised when I found out! I was so surprised my coat turned white! Though that was probably because of the bag of flour I dropped. I was all 'EEEUUUUUHHHHHH!' and they were all 'Pinkie don't tell anyone' and I was all 'cross my heart hope to fly stick a cupcake in my eye' and then they told everyone and I was all 'WOOHOO!' and now I'm going to go eat cake and be all OM NOM NOM NOM!"

And with that, the party resumed. Having survived the first response, Twilight made a check on her mental checklist as she headed back to the refreshment table. If anyone tried to talk to her, the excuse of a full mouth would buy her extra moments to respond while simultaneously working out how and when to leave the party. She needed to leave, but bolting too soon would arouse suspicion. She had just decided that she should stay at least a minimum of twenty minutes when Rainbow Dash glided across the room and landed next to her.

"So what was this thing you needed to talk to me about?" Dash asked, sending a fresh wave of adrenaline through Twilight's body. Any other time she would have been overjoyed at Dash's company, but now she needed to get away.

"Hmm? Oh, nothing. That problem resolved itself actually. No need to worry about it." Twilight replied in as calm and casual a manner as she could muster.

"Are you sure? You don't need any more help?"

"No. I had just misplaced my hairbrush and was wondering if you had seen it or could help me find it, but I just remembered where I put it so it's fine now. Everything's fine." Twilight lied as she turned away to grab another piece of cake. She might have been able to keep a believable face, and Dash wasn't the most perceptive of ponies, but she wasn't about to risk giving anything away.

"Okay then. If you ever need anything else Twi, just tell me. You can count on me for anything. I'd never leave a friend hanging." Rainbow flashed that cocky smile that set Twilight's heart aflutter.

"I will. Thanks Dash. You're the best friend a pony could hope for." Twilight closely scrutinized her slice of cake, barely concealing the pain caused by such kind words that only minutes ago would have filled her with joy, but now felt like icy daggers in her heart.

As Rainbow Dash glided back towards Applejack, Twilight felt her eyes start to water slightly and got an idea. Instead of forcing her tears back or trying to covertly wipe them, she simply rubbed them, blinking a few times and making a few irritated noises. Now she could play off any redness or watering as legitimate irritation from some mysterious illness she was suddenly developing.

Now she just had to wait. She continued to mingle, inserting herself into group conversations and taking a back seat with occasional monosyllable responses. She continued rubbing at her eyes and using the occasional tissue (she found her nose was starting to run a bit) until somepony took notice.

"Twilight darling, are you feeling alright? You're starting to look dreadful!"

Seeing her opportunity at last, Twilight seized upon it. "Well actually, I am starting to feel a bit under the weather. Sorry girls, but it looks like I may have to turn in early. I hope you don't mind."

After being reassured that they would be fine without her and that looking after her health was far more important, she gave a final congratulations to the happy couple and bid the rest of her friends goodnight. Once she was around the corner and safely out of sight, she teleported herself directly to the library. Enveloping the front door in the purple glow of her magic, she slammed it behind her so hard that she temporarily feared it might split down the middle. She was glad she had sent Spike away for the weekend. She was in no mood to explain herself and probably wouldn't be for a few days.

As she sullenly walked toward the stairs to her bedroom, she conjured a bucket of water and submerged the pile of fireworks sitting in the corner before throwing them in the trash without a second glance. After slowly dragging herself up the stairs and collapsing onto her bed, Twilight Sparkle paused a full three seconds before checking off the final box on her mental checklist and getting around to the long task of crying herself to sleep.

Author's Note

Alright. Chapter 2 is done. This was originally going to be part of a much larger chapter, but I keep ending up with a lot of natural break points so I figured it was better to post what I had and make a short chapter than hold onto it while trying to tiredly push through the next part. I'm finding that writing takes a really long time when you agonize and obsess over the placement of every word. Hope you are enjoying things so far. This essentially wraps up the prologue and the bulk of the story lies ahead. I don't have pre-readers so do your duty by complaining loudly, especially about any technical problems.

Chapter 3

One of the few benefits of crying yourself to sleep is that it tends to make you sleep like a log. After a night of deep and dreamless sleep, Twilight awoke feeling refreshed and at peace. In her half awake state, she enjoyed the rays of late morning sunlight that streamed through her bedroom window and left a pleasant warmth on her face. She knew it was going to be a bright day, full of promise, with a beautiful bright blue sky. The kind that Dash loved to take advantage of.

And just like that, her peaceful state burst like a soap bubble as memories of the previous day came flooding back. The announcement, the love that had filled Dash's eyes whenever she looked at Applejack, the kiss, Applejack's evil cackle as she twirled her mustache. No, that last part didn't happen. Her memory was starting to embellish a bit. She was fairly certain the news hadn't been accompanied by an actual record scratch either, as the music had already been turned off.

Twilight turned and pulled the covers over her head to shield herself from the hideous burning rays of the sinister torture device that Celestia had surely created to punish her for some past transgression. She hid safely inside her linen cocoon, sealing herself off from the cruel world that had the indecency to keep going, completely indifferent to her suffering, instead of coming to an end. She didn't need it. She would form a new world in here. The glorious nation of sheetland that she would rule over as princess. Admittedly, it did have a problem with rapidly rising carbon dioxide levels. She would have to call a committee to look into the possibility of air holes.

After several hours, followed by severe political unrest from the proletariat of the stomach, she decided to temporarily reopen limited diplomatic channels with Equestria in order to get lunch. She didn't bother to glance in the mirror or brush her hair. She didn't plan on going anywhere or seeing anypony today.

After a simple daisy sandwich, her mood was slightly improved. Having beaten back the hunger that had come from skipping breakfast, her mood had crawled from abysmal all the way up to simply terrible. It dropped right back down again when she glanced over at the garbage can where she had deposited the soaked fireworks. The fireworks she spent nearly two weeks researching and developing as a labor of love. That she had praised as her most inspired and brilliant of ideas. That now lay in the bottom of a trash can among coffee grounds and Spike's claw clippings. After summoning a spade and checking outside, she levitated the remains of her work out of the trash and carried them with her out the door and around behind the library.

She knew nopony was going to look through her garbage. Even if they did, they probably wouldn't recognize the purpose behind the soaked and misshapen packages of black powder. Still, she felt the need to hide the evidence. Evidence that she had ever been so foalish as to think this was a good idea. What had she been thinking?

She tore into the ground a bit more violently than necessary, until she had several small holes, each about two feet deep. Scattering the soggy packages among the holes, she shredded them a bit to further disguise their original forms before burying them. With the grass carefully pressed back into place, there was no sign of disturbance. Once torn to pieces, the fireworks had hardly displaced any earth at all. She gave a small sigh of relief, as if she were some kind of murderer who had just disposed of the bodies.

"Whatcha doin?"

Twilight nearly jumped out of her skin as she looked up to see Rainbow Dash hovering above her head. Every curse word in the unicorn's expansive vocabulary sped through her head on repeat. Under normal circumstances, the sight of Rainbow Dash would have brought joy, but these were hardly normal circumstances. Why hadn't she waited to do this at night?!

"GAH! How long have you been there?!"

"Just got here actually. Since you had to go home sick last night, I thought I'd drop by and check up on you today. Speaking of which, you still look pretty rough. What are you doing up and about out here?"

Part of Twilight was relieved that Dash hadn't seen anything incriminating. A second part was giddy that Dash cared enough to check up on her. A third part was aware of how disheveled she must still look. The rest of her was desperately trying to come up with an excuse to cover her flank and make the inquisitive pegasus go away.

"Actually, I am still pretty sick. I just came out here to gather some ingredients for tea." Eternally grateful for the wildflowers growing against the back wall of the library, she walked over and picked some. "Yep. Fluttershy is always going on about the benefits of herbal tea."

"Yuck. Well good luck with that smelly stuff. Anyway, I'm not doing anything today, so I was wondering if you needed any company since Spike is gone and I know you're all alone over here."

Dash wanted to spend time with her? Was offering to take care of her? Alone in her house? Yes!

"Oh no, I'm fine. Besides I'm probably terribly contagious right now."

What?! No! What are you doing traitorous lips?!

"Eh. I'll be careful. Besides, I'm not afraid of a few sniffles. It's no problem at all."

That was close. Now just say yes, head inside, and-

"No, really. I'll be okay. You should go spend some time with Applejack."

WHAT?!

"Nah. She's busy with her applebucking right now."

"Then you should go help her. I'm sure she'd appreciate it as a sweet romantic gesture."

STOP! WAIT! COME BACK DASH! DON'T GO!

It was too late. Rainbow Dash had already agreed, said goodbye, and was disappearing over the horizon. She had blown it spectacularly. Not only had she turned down an afternoon of Dash's undivided attention, something she would normally smack Celestia across the face for, she had subsequently sent her flying directly into Applejack's arms.

After bucking the side of the library as hard as she could in frustration, Twilight walked back inside. She made herself a second sandwich and a glass of water, and carried them up to her room. Setting them down next to her bed, she crawled back into her comfy cocoon. Diplomatic relations with the outside world had broken down and she was considering full sanctions.

Author's Note

Apologies for another criminally short, one scene chapter. I hate short chapters so I'm a massive hypocrite. It's just that it's going to be bit longer until my next update and I don't have the self-control to sit on this until then. I promise the next chapter, whenever it happens, will be larger. Not sure if people in general prefer quickly updating small chapters or more spread out larger ones. I prefer the latter, but as stated above, I'm a hypocrite with no self-control.

Chapter 4

The pony-shaped pile of misery and self-pity, formerly known as Twilight Sparkle, continued to sulk. Aside from a brief and unavoidable trip to the bathroom, she spent the rest of the irritatingly pleasant day in bed. She had briefly tried opening the window to let in the breeze, but the disgustingly cheerful chirping of birds had prompted her to shut it again. One would think that spending the day in bed would result in restless energy and an inability to sleep once night came. Instead, Twilight found that her intermittent cycles of brooding and crying all day long had left her quite exhausted.

She awoke the next morning with a severe stiffness and the fear of bedsores motivating her to finally get up. She gave one long stretch before heading downstairs to make some toast. Spike would be returning late this evening, meaning she would have a day to pull herself together enough to be at least somewhat presentable. Hopefully she could be, if not pleasant, at least not a total pain to be around.

After finishing her breakfast, she quickly set about searching for something to do. Anything to fill the time and take her mind off of Rainbow Dash for the day. What would she normally do on any other day before her world had been destroyed? Before she had ever fallen for that stupid, sexy, charming pegasus. What could she do to be herself again? The answer suddenly came to her. Science!

Trotting down the stairs to her basement laboratory, she started pulling various pieces of chemistry equipment from their respective shelves. There was an experiment she had been meaning to run for a while now. First she would need some hydrogen gas. Frowning upon discovering that her tank was empty, she started to set up her hydrolysis equipment to make more. After filling the container with water and making sure the empty tank was securely fastened to the tubing above the cathode, she connected the electrical leads to the power source and waited. And waited. Something was wrong.

Bubbles of hydrogen gas should have been rising up the tubing from one end and filling the tank. Twilight facehoofed as she realized that she had filled the tank with distilled water. Of course it wouldn't conduct electricity. Well she just needed to add some electrolytes. A Rainbow Dash of salt would fix...a dash of...several grams of NaCl would fix that. After adding some salt to the water and waiting a few minutes, she had her hydrogen.

Next, she needed to prepare some solutions of varying pH. Setting up her acids, indicators, and pipettes, she got to work, letting the relaxing monotony of titration spread over her mind. Measuring volumes, running through the familiar calculations, counting the slow, rhythmic drops of acid, all of it brought a sense of calm.

Hmm...needs to be about twenty percent more acidic.

Where had that thought come from? That wasn't right at all. The pH scale was logarithmic, each number down from seven being a tenfold change. Twenty percent was way off. Pushing the thought aside, she finished her last solution and placed it next to the others.

Having absentmindedly used a different indicator for each solution, she noticed that the flasks formed a rainbow across the table. With an irritated groan, she dumped the chemicals down the sink and gave the equipment a quick cleaning before putting it away. She didn't feel like chemistry anymore. Maybe some light reading would be better.

Returning back upstairs, she scanned her shelves, looking for a good book to sink into. Magically plucking a book at random, she levitated it across the room and set it down in front of her to see it was one of her physics texts. Making herself comfortable on the couch, she opened to the chapter titled "Optics for Eggheads".

When light enters a new material, such as water or glass, the speed of the light decreases. As mentioned in the previous chapter, waves entering a slower medium will bend towards that medium, much like a cart with one side on a paved road and one side in the mud will turn towards the mud. This wave bending is referred to as refraction and depends on a property of the medium known as 'index of refraction'. This is simply the regular speed of light divided by the speed in the medium.

Twilight felt the calm returning to her mind as she soaked in the familiar information. Nothing that she hadn't learned long ago, but the descriptions still felt therapeutic. A soothing balm for her stress addled brain.

The index of refraction is a result of the atomic structure of the material. A photon traveling through dense material will encounter more atoms in its path and be absorbed and re-emitted by more of the bound electrons, resulting in a slower speed through the material. Furthermore, frequencies of light closer to the natural frequencies of the electrons are more likely to interact and will do so more often, resulting in slightly different indices of refraction for different wavelengths. This is what allows a prism to split white light into its individual wavelengths, resulting in a beautiful Rainbow Dash.

The book slammed shut as Twilight shoved it unceremoniously back into its slot on the shelf. At wits end, she desperately searched for something else until her eyes came to rest on her complete collection of Daring Do novels.

Memories flooded her mind. The elation she had felt when she had successfully turned Rainbow Dash onto the joy of reading. How Dash had spent the next couple of weeks visiting the library to read the rest of the series. To just sit and read with her. It wasn't until after the third book that Dash had dropped her habit of reading out loud. Twilight hadn't minded at all. She had loved listening to the eager excitement that gripped Dash's voice through every action scene. Had smiled as she watched Dash forget her surroundings, floating in the air as her hooves gripped the binding and her eyes raced through the pages.

On a few wonderful evenings, having nothing important to do the next day, Dash would stay late and read long into the night, falling asleep on Twilight's couch. On those nights, Twilight would spend hours watching Dash sleep, resisting the temptation to lean over and plant the tiniest of kisses on the sleeping mare, and hoping that her resistance would fail. She would gently settle down on the opposite end of the couch, still close enough to reach out and touch, and would try in vain to get to sleep during this sublime torture.

The weight of all these memories, the sight of Dash curled up on the couch, the sound of her gentle breathing, the scent that lingered in the cushions, the faint traces of body heat that Twilight swore she could feel hours later, they all came down on the unicorn's mind like a sledgehammer, crushing her already feeble defenses into dust and restarting the same, well worn patterns of thought that had plagued her all of yesterday.

It's not fair.

She and Dash belonged together. Were supposed to be together. Her own level headed and nerdy demeanor could hardly contrast more with the athlete's fiery arrogance and thrill seeking, but they seemed to complement each other perfectly. They seemed to complete each other, each mitigating the flaws of the other. Twilight had never realized how isolated and withdrawn she had become until her friends had started teaching her about the magic of friendship. Dash had done far more for her than anypony in bringing her out of her shell. Twilight knew she had a positive effect on Dash as well. Though she could hardly admit to Dash having flaws, she knew that their many experiences had smoothed some of the rougher edges to the pegasus' personality.

For all their wonderful contrast, they also had so much in common. Be it in magic or flight, they were both incredibly talented. The best. Twilight, when she wasn't being personally tutored by the most powerful being in existence, had always been at the top of her classes in the academy. Dash, the only one who could pull off a legendary sonic rainboom, had proved time and again that she deserved her self-appointed title of fastest flyer in Equestria. Neither was content to rest on their laurels. Both remained passionately driven to continue improving themselves and surpassing their previous limitations. As Twilight continued to study and experiment with new forms of magic, Dash never stopped training or experimenting with new maneuvers. They knew they could always do better, that if they kept at it for even another hour, they might reach new and untold heights.

It just made so much sense, like the most natural thing in the world. If the universe had any sense to it, had any kind of underlying rationality, any justice, then they should be together. Dash should burst through her door, sweep her off her hooves, and take her soaring through the skies. They should sit on a cloud, watching the sunset, and stay there all night staring at the stars. They should be together, happy and harmonious for the rest of their lives.

Then why?

The answer was simple. The universe didn't care. It didn't care what elaborate romantic narratives a single insignificant unicorn had fabricated for herself. It didn't care what was right and good and meant to be, just what was, and that was the fact that Rainbow Dash loved Applejack.

Applejack. If it wasn't for her...

As they had done multiple times the previous day, dark fantasies began to play through Twilight's mind. Images of levitating Applejack by the throat and slowly squeezing as the earth pony's legs kicked wildly above the ground and her eyes started to bug out. Of silencing that irritating country drawl by shoving her hat down her throat until she choked on it. Unfortunately, Twilight always seemed to ruin her own fantasies by including the logical consequences of every action. None of the scenarios ever led anywhere good. In none of them did hurting Dash's marefriend suddenly make her love Twilight.

Well if Applejack were removed in a more permanent manner, Dash would be single again. Nopony would find a body in the Everfree.

I'm not even sure where to start with how stupidly terrible that idea is. First of all, I'm not exactly an experienced murderer and there are a lot of things to screw up. Given the potential costs if caught, the risk is way too big.

She imagined Dash staring at her with a look of absolute disgust and horror, with those of her own friends and family as an afterthought.

Really wouldn't be that hard. Some pressure on the right spot in the brain, move a vein a few millimeters, and it looks like a stroke. Just a tragic accident.

Applejack makes Dash happy. Her death would leave Dash emotionally devastated. I could never hurt her like that.

You would make her happy too. Far happier even. She would be sad for a while, recover, then find true love with you. If you care about maximizing her happiness, utilitarianism practically requires you to do it.

First of all, that is an absurdly narrow and unrealistic view of the effects of traumatic loss. Second, minimize suffering before maximizing happiness. Rule number one: "Do not do anything to harm Rainbow Dash, or allow her to come to harm." That certainly includes devastating emotional trauma.

Twilight recalled the night she had decided that her dramatic shift in personal priorities had required formal codification, and had stayed up writing "Sparkle's Laws of Love".

Of course, there were the mountains of other reasons she would never kill anypony. Apart from the dozens of philosophical moral reasons why she disapproved of cold blooded murder, she found the very concept sickening and fundamentally wrong. Not being a complete sociopath, she would of course be destroyed by guilt even if she never had to see Applebloom grieving over her sister with the rest of her family. There was no way she'd ever make it through the funeral without cracking. Then there was the fact that, despite extreme jealousy, she didn't actually dislike her personally. She genuinely liked having Applejack as a friend and didn't have any sincere desire to hurt her, disturbingly detailed fantasies to the contrary.

All of these reasons were true, all perfectly valid enough on their own, yet none of them were ever the first to come to her mind and none seemed quite as persuasive an argument as the fact that it would make Rainbow Dash sad. Some part of Twilight thought that she should probably feel more concerned about what those priorities said about her.

It was around this point that her anger would begin to waver. It wasn't like Applejack had ever intended to slight her. All Applejack was guilty of was loving Rainbow Dash, a position Twilight could easily empathize with. She couldn't quite scrape together enough hypocrisy to denounce her for falling for Dash. There was so much there to love.

Maybe her own feelings weren't unique at all. Maybe Applejack had been tormented just as long, or even longer, by feelings just as strong as hers. Maybe Applejack had lain awake at night, her own unconfessed feelings tearing her apart inside. Maybe, after her own nerve wracking night on a hill somewhere, Applejack was every bit as grateful as Twilight would be in her place. Part of her lashed out at the idea.

No! My feelings are special! Unique! Applejack couldn't possibly feel the way I do! Nopony could!

The part of Twilight's mind that was still in the business of making sense scoffed at the thought. The idea that in the history of the entire world, nopony who had ever lived had felt love and heartbreak as much as she had. That she, Twilight Sparkle, had truly plumbed the depths of what was emotionally possible in the universe. It was self-absorbed, ludicrous, pathetic, and she actually managed to believe it for several seconds at a time before dismissing it.

With her seething anger now extinguished, she didn't feel any better. Without Applejack as an effective target, and completely unable to place any blame on Dash, her frustrations inevitably turned back on herself. It was usually at this point in the cycle that she was plagued by the more persistent and unsettling of questions. Was it her fault? Was there something more she could have done? Maybe if she hadn't waited so long. Maybe if she had made a move sooner, Dash would be with her instead.

Probably not. Rainbow Dash and Applejack had known each other for a long time, had probably been close for a long time. Feelings could have been building on both sides before she had even realized her own feelings for Dash. For all she knew, they could have been seeing each other since long before then. It could be that there was nothing she could have possibly done, that it was just a tragically doomed venture from the beginning. That would grant her a miniscule bit of peace. She would still be miserable, but she would know it wasn't her fault. The problem was that she didn't know, and that uncertainty ate at her far worse than any answer would have. Eventually, after a few more minutes of crying and self-pity, her thoughts would turn once again to Applejack.

She probably doesn't even care that much. Probably treats it as just some fling. She'll only end up hurting Dash somehow. She needs to be stopped. For Dash's sake.

Again, the graphic fantasies would come back to restart the cycle ad infinitum.

Twilight had to stop it. Had to quiet down the storm in her mind before she tore herself and the entire library apart. With a quickly forming idea, she hurried up the stairs to the bathroom. She ran over to the bathtub and cranked the hot water valve as far as it would go. A scalding hot bath, as hot as she could possibly stand. It had worked wonders in the past whenever she had worked herself into a stressed panic over an assignment for the princess. She also used it to burn off a cold with the artificial fever.

With the spacious tub filled, she dipped a foreleg into the steaming water, gritting her teeth and forcing herself not to snatch it out. The burning pain momentarily cut through the storm in her mind before subsiding. She brought her other legs in, feeling the hairs on her legs curl under the intense heat. Lowering the rest of herself down into the water, she leaned backwards, leaving only her head above the surface to rest against the edge. She was already sweating profusely, her body desperately trying to regulate its internal temperature in the face of such drastic change. Painful thoughts still raced through her head, but more slowly.

Taking a deep breath, she slipped her head underwater and let out a slow, steady stream of bubbles until she passed neutral buoyancy and sank to the bottom. Curled up on the bottom of the bathtub, safe from the troubles in the world above the surface, she let the heat wash over her and wrap around her mind like a blanket. Her thoughts gradually slowed and finally came to a stop, her mind now blank.

She swished her tail and listened to the microscopic changes in current that rippled across her. Her lungs began to weakly protest, but she ignored them. It was perfect here. Her empty mind was filled with the soothing and rhythmic pounding of her heart, beating at a much faster tempo than normal due to the heat and dwindling reserves of oxygen. The pounding in her ears grew deafening and continued to speed up as her lungs started to burn. Still she ignored them, she would stay down here forever.

Her preservation instincts finally stepped in and overrode her with a flood of panic inducing hormones, forcing her to break the surface and gasp for breath. Riding along the border of heat stroke, she hung her head over the edge of the bathtub and briefly closed her eyes to the lightly spinning world.

***

When she opened her eyes again, the water had cooled and the room was noticeably darker. Pulling herself out of the uncomfortably tepid water, she opened the drain and found a towel. Aware of a painful throbbing in her head, she realized how dehydrated she was and went back downstairs. Just as she finished her sixth glass of water, she heard the front door open.

"Hey Twilight I'm back," she heard her dragon assistant call as he walked through the door. "Anything big and important happen while I was gone?"

Twilight struggled to keep sarcasm out of her voice as she replied. "No, you didn't miss anything here. How was the sleepover?"

"It was fine, well except for the part where Scootaloo suggested they try to get dragon taming cutie marks."

Twilight gave a small giggle at the mental image of Spike being chased around the room, beaten with pillows, and tied up by three schoolfillies. "Well it certainly sounds like you had an interesting time."

"Yeah, and the best part was that I got to help Rarity with one of her projects! She said I was a big help and she couldn't have done it without me." A familiar lovesick look moved across Spike's face.

Twilight suddenly felt the urge to wipe that smile off his face. To reach out and crush his hopes. Tell him that this idiot crush he nurtured would lead nowhere. Even ignoring the age difference, she was a unicorn and he was a Celestia damned dragon! It was never going to work and he should just give up now.

"Oh really? What was this project?"

"Well when Rarity got back from that party she went to, she was all excited to make some new set of matching outfits. Apparently they were a gift for Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Did you know they're dating now? I always thought that there was something between those two."

"Yes. I heard something about that." Twilight replied with a bit more edge to her voice. "Anyway, I haven't eaten dinner yet, so I should get on that. Then I have some work to finish up." As she turned back toward the kitchen, she remembered one last detail. "I'm also thinking about moving you into your own room."

"Whoa! You really mean it Twilight?"

"You are growing quite a bit. I think it's time you got some space of your own. Help me clean out the spare storage room and we can move you in tonight."

While this was true, she had an ulterior motive. She expected she would need quite a bit more time before she was done crying herself to sleep and wanted some privacy to do so in peace.

***

The next week remained rough. The same thoughts returned to her frequently and she needed another one of her scalding bath sessions once or twice a day. She stayed holed up in the library and was constantly on edge, occasionally snapping at Spike when she didn't mean to.

The second week was bad, but at least she had gotten out a bit. Finally giving into Spike's insistence that she needed some fresh air for the sake of both their sanity, she had gone on a nature walk with Fluttershy and almost enjoyed herself. She had also given a genuine smile during a cupcake baking session with Pinkie Pie, and had almost avoided thinking about Dash for the duration. She still stained her pillow with tears every night.

By the third week, things were almost bearable. The pain hadn't diminished much, but her tolerance for it seemed to have increased. It was now a constant background throbbing with occasional flare ups. She was back to interacting with her friends regularly and had even hung out with Applejack and found that they still got along quite well. It was only when leaving after spending time with Dash, or having to watch Dash and Applejack being affectionate that she would spiral into depression.

At the end of the fourth week, Twilight felt she had successfully come to grips with the situation. Had managed some kind of acceptance. She still loved Rainbow Dash, would probably always love her. Still, she wanted more than anything for Dash to be happy, and if it meant giving up her own happiness, it was worth it. She would still carry Dash with her in her heart, but she would move on. She would probably never find another pony who quite measured up, but that was okay. As Twilight Sparkle closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep with a sense of acceptance and resolution, she felt like she had learned something important. Had closed the door on a major part of her life and was about to open the door to a new one.

Then tomorrow came, and she didn't feel a single bit different.

Author's Note

No this is not the end of the story. This is the end of what I am tentatively calling the first act, of which there will likely be three (four if I ever go back and properly expand on all those events in the first chapter). Secondly, HA! I probably made you learn some science! Guess what I do for a living. Third, writing is hard and takes forever. Still loving it way more than I thought I would. When I started writing this I thought it was just going to be a crappy one shot. Maybe 8,000 words maximum.

Chapter 5

Twilight Sparkle stared up at her ceiling in the vain hope that something would change. All she noticed was a tingling feeling where her right rear leg had fallen asleep. She had probably slept on it wrong. Something else was wrong. She was supposed to feel...what was she supposed to feel? What exactly had she been expecting? She didn't think she was just going to forget about Dash altogether. She knew emotional healing took time, that she might have lingering feelings for Dash for a long time. Still, she had hoped that four weeks of soul searching and introspection would have made some kind of dent. Instead, she felt just as miserable and heartbroken as ever.

She was certain she had dreamed about Dash again last night. While the memory had vanished before she had even finished waking up, she recognized the lingering feelings. The expectation as she rolled over and opened her eyes, and the crushing disappointment as she failed to see a splash of color beside her. The sense of betrayal, as if something wonderful had been dangled in front of her face before being cruelly ripped away, as her hooves met only air and mattress. The twist in her stomach and stinging behind her eyes as she remembered the unyielding facts of the waking world that she had been thrust back into so suddenly. The wrinkling of her nose as she squeezed her eyes shut in a desperate and futile attempt to rewind and pick up where she had left off for just a few minutes longer.

Twilight threw off the covers and leapt out of bed. Gritting her teeth as she tried to work feeling back into her leg, she began to pace, giving a flick of her tail at each turn as her frustration grew. She had done everything right. Had taken all the advice she had found in her books. Glancing over at the stack of books in the corner, she gave a snort of annoyance.

The guides to dealing with loss and moving on from failed relationships had been irritatingly vague. Aside from a few semi-useful breathing exercises she had found in one book, there was nothing of value to be gained from them. Every single one seemed to be no more than an exercise in filling pages by restating the same five stages of grief, followed by hollow platitudes of time healing all wounds. She had briefly entertained the notion of creating a drinking game for every time the phrase "Carpe Diem" appeared, but didn't hate her liver nearly enough to try it. The covers could be switched and she doubted the authors would even notice.

Bunch of useless, armchair psychologist hacks. Probably never had a tragic relationship in their lives and they feel qualified to give advice after a third hand account of somepony's experience and an intro level psych course.

She had turned next to fiction. Maybe there was a decent role model character in some romantic novel or play. Writers were supposed to be experts on the equine condition weren't they? Maybe she could at least get some decent catharsis.

Apparently, as the rejected love interest, she was supposed to either die tragically or graciously step aside, caring only about her beloved's happiness, and fade into the background. She had been trying to take the second path. She had reached the point where she gives one last nod over her shoulder and walks quietly off into the sunset, a last farewell whispering on the wind. The End.

And that was it. The story just stopped. It never explained what the character did the next day, or the next week, or year. Did they spend the rest of their days as a hermit pining away in a secluded shack? Did they go about their ordinary life, making breakfast or cleaning the house while giving long sighs about what could have been? What did they do with themselves now? Pick up a hobby making decorative coasters?

I'm supposed to care about Rainbow Dash's happiness above all else. If she's happy, that should be enough for me right?

But I want to be the one to make her happy. I'd rather she be happy than not, but it's not enough on its own. I need to be a part of it.

But if you truly love something, shouldn't you be able to let it go?

A stupid canard uttered only by idiots who have obviously never experienced love themselves. If you actually love something, you should go after it. Hold onto it no matter what it takes. No matter what the cost. To even consider "letting it go" just indicates that you never cared enough about it in the first place.

Something about this last thought rang true in her head. Her feelings were more than targeted and focused altruism. There was also an undercurrent of insatiable greed. She would do anything for Dash, give her own life if need be, but she also wanted Dash's undivided attention, needed Dash to look at her, needed to be an important part of her life. She could never be satisfied watching from the sidelines like an anonymous guardian angel.

Most of the stories she had read felt they had to separate the darker or more negative aspects away from "true" love. Associate it with a villain or tragic fallen hero and call it obsession or infatuation. Make it, at best, a corrupted and lesser form of love, and at worst, an insincere result of vanity and self-obsession. No, the villain or creepy stalker's feelings couldn't possibly be legitimate, couldn't possibly be on equal footing as that of the hero. They just wanted the damsel as a trophy because they were too broken to understand what real love was. Were incapable of truly loving anything other than themselves. If they were good, their feelings would be pure.

To Twilight, the main difference between the actions of a romantic suitor and a creepy stalker seemed to be one of successful execution. Even if a pony's idea of a touching romantic gesture was completely deranged, it might be reason to question their sanity, but certainly not their sincerity.

Reflecting on the uselessness of cliche ridden literature was getting her nowhere. She needed to focus on her available options and figure this out herself. Unfortunately, there didn't seem to be any options and she was currently in danger of wearing a groove into the floor with her pacing.

Deciding that some fresh air might help, Twilight hurried downstairs to make a quick sandwich and grab a scarf. After leaving a hastily written note informing Spike that she had gone out for a walk and didn't know when she'd be back, she walked out the door with her simple lettuce and carrot sandwich levitating close beside her. Walking with no set destination in mind, she took small nibbles of her sandwich as she reviewed the situation once again.

Murder was already off the list. Seduce Dash away with her raw charm and sex appeal? Yeah, right after Rarity took a job cleaning septic tanks. What about breaking them apart by other means? She could actively sabotage the relationship by fostering discontent. Push their competitive streaks into full blown fights and encourage each side privately. Encourage miscommunication with her own hearsay. Maybe even plant some evidence of unfaithfulness. A multitude of Twilights weighed the pros and cons in her head.

That's absolutely sickening, and you should crawl into a hole and die for even considering that!

I'm just making the list of options here, not saying they are good or bad.

How about they're completely EVIL! Seriously, this is the kind of thing Discord would do.

Definitely bad ideas. They're loyalty and honesty incarnate, so fostering miscommunication, doubt, and mistrust is highly unlikely to work. Also brings a high risk of detection. They'll see right through it and then Dash will be furious.

Those are just excuses. Rationalizations. You know you actually would have a decent chance of pulling it off if you actually tried. You're just exaggerating the risk and making excuses because you don't have the stomach to follow through. You don't want to admit that you still care more about being a "good pony" than you do about having Dash.

Well how's this for a good reason? The whole thing still causes distress and harm to Dash. Rule number one, end of discussion, motion rejected.

Having finished her sandwich, Twilight took a brief look at her surroundings and found that she had inadvertently walked to Sweet Apple Acres. Dash's cloud house floated above her head, having been pushed there some time last week so the two ponies could see each other more often. Not that it took much time for Dash to travel the distance, but now Applejack could come knocking (well yelling from the ground really) whenever she wanted. Dash wasn't in at the moment. She was probably busy getting the other weather pegasi ready for the first snowfall of the year. From what she had heard, they were pretty far behind schedule.

"Howdy there Twi!" Applejack called from behind as Twilight nearly jumped out of her skin. "Anything you need or you just come by to visit?"

Twilight gave a gentle shake of her head. "No. Nothing. Just went out for a walk and ended up here."

"Well I just finished making the biggest apple pie you've ever seen and was out here checking the fences while it cooled. Should be done right about now. You're welcome to have some if you like."

Twilight considered the offer. She still didn't dislike Applejack on a personal level, and her company wasn't entirely unpleasant. It was also incredibly difficult to turn down Applejack's baking. "I'd love some, thank you."

Walking back through the lines of now leafless trees, the pair of ponies were greeted by the most mouth watering smell drifting up from the farm house. Once they got closer, Twilight noticed that the pie was in fact cooling on the open windowsill. She didn't think anypony actually did that, but if it tasted half as good as it smelled, she wasn't about to complain about cliches.

Once inside, she took a seat at the nearby table while Applejack cut them two large slices. Between bites, they started some friendly chatter. The latest trouble Applebloom and her friends had gotten into trying to get their cutie marks, Pinkie's latest confectionery invention, how the two topics had intersected and events had spiraled out of control until the barn had somehow ended up filled with noodles. The only pegasus mentioned was Fluttershy and how she had helped out when Winnona had gotten sick eating mushrooms at the edge of the Everfree forest.

Before they realized it, two hours had passed and they had both eaten far more pie than intended. Despite a somewhat overfilled stomach, Twilight wore a sincere smile as she shared a story about how Spike had once gotten his head stuck in a bread box. With a sudden whooshing noise, Rainbow Dash swooped through the open window and dropped perfectly into a nearby seat.

"Hey AJ, I'm back. Oh hey there Twilight, how are - ooh pie!" She mostly greeted them before tearing into the dessert with a ferocity normally reserved for a certain pink earth pony.

Twilight felt slightly queasy as her pie filled stomach tried to make room for the butterflies now flapping about like they owned the place. She was both happy at the prospect of spending time with Dash, and distraught with the knowledge that she would have to suffer through the couple being so undeniably good together. After licking a few lingering crumbs off her nose, Dash filled them in on her weather team's progress. It looked like things were all set to snow later this evening.

The room was suddenly filled with cacophonous shouts of "Cutie Mark Crusader Diversion Creators!" as Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo burst through the door, snatched the hat off of a stunned Applejack, and bolted back outside as fast as they could, as a formerly stunned and currently angry Applejack gave chase.

"Not quite what I had in mind, but it'll do. Now we can talk privately." Dash said as she turned towards Twilight with a conspiratorial look in her eyes.

Twilight's mind was running so fast she thought it might burst into flames. What did Dash need to talk to her about? Why did it require secrecy? She attempted to curb her wild speculations and failed spectacularly. She pulled herself together enough to give a brief nod of acknowledgement.

"There's a little something I need your help with."

"Anything!" She answered a little more quickly and forcefully than she had intended.

"Well Hearth's Warming Eve is coming up and I have this really great idea for a gift for Applejack, but it requires some magic."

Twilight managed to redirect her falling facial muscles from disappointment into what she hoped was a look of focused attention before giving another short nod.

"I want to take her flying with me, show her what the farm looks like from the clouds, maybe let her visit my place once in a while since I'm always in here messing up her house. I know you've got that walk on clouds spell, but I know you're not just gonna be around to cast it whenever. I was wondering if there's some way to store spells for later."

She managed to unclench her jaw long enough to answer. "Yes. With a small object to use as a talisman, I could enchant it to hold about 20 charges of a cloud walking spell that should affect the wearer when activated. If I make it right, the charges could even be refilled."

"Wow, that's awesome! And I think I have just the thing. Hang on." Speeding off to some nearby secret hiding place, Dash returned holding a necklace with a shiny heart shaped pendant on it. A jagged lightning bolt and an apple were engraved on opposite sides. "This was going to be my backup gift, but it would totally make the perfect, most awesomest talisman. So do you think you could help me with this Twilight?"

It was the easiest question she ever had to answer. There was no way she would turn down a direct request from Rainbow Dash, especially with that pleading look in her eyes. "I'd love to help Dash. Consider it done." She was prepared to go to any lengths to fulfill this demand. What she wasn't prepared for was Dash's arms being thrown around her neck in a hug that turned her mind to mush and filled her nose with a smell like sunshine after a heavy rain. Twilight hoped that Dash couldn't hear her jackhammer of a heartbeat, though she was sure it could be heard as far off as Canterlot. As the hug came to an end, she was glad she remembered a cosmetics spell that she had learned from Rarity to cover up excess blush.

"Thanks Twilight, you're the best. I'd better get going now, my break is almost over. You may wanna take off with that pendant before Applejack gets back. Don't let her know anything about this."

With that, Rainbow Dash was up and streaking across the sky. Twilight searched around for a pen and pad of paper to leave a note thanking Applejack for the pie, then picked up the pendant in her magic and left. She twirled it in front of her as she walked, seeing how the light reflected off the intricately carved designs. It had obviously been made with great care.

When she had finished enchanting it, Dash was going to use it to take Applejack flying. It would probably be breathtaking, and romantic, and everything Twilight had ever dreamed it would be. They would probably spend hours perched on a cloud and staring at the night sky, or into each other's eyes. Then they'd probably head back to Dash's cloud house for the night and--Twilight turned and bucked the nearest tree hard enough that it would have dropped every single apple, if it hadn't already shed all of its fruit and leaves for the winter. Turning to a nearby boulder, she lashed out with her mind and reduced it to rubble. Focusing on her breathing, she continued walking until she was back on the main road.

What was she going to do now? The short term answer was easy. She was going to get to work and make the best talisman anypony had ever seen. No matter who it was ultimately for, she would give her all for a favor to Dash. However, she still hadn't resolved her long term problem from earlier. With actively working toward the destruction of Dash's current relationship off the table, there didn't seem to be any courses of action left. There was just...doing nothing. A lot of first time relationships simply didn't pan out (of course she knew her own relationship with Dash would certainly work) so maybe a little patience would pay off. Maybe there was even a chance that, while she was waiting for things to fall apart on their own, she might figure out how this acceptance and moving on business was supposed to work.

She realized that this was probably nurturing false hope, that she should just give up completely and move on. But she had already tried that and she still didn't know what "move on" even meant. She had tried to kill hope, but it just flared back like a phoenix. If it were as easy as flipping an off switch for her feelings, this wouldn't be a problem.

She couldn't say that she had come to a decision. More that she had worked out what was going to happen anyway. She would sit back, wait, and hope that something changed. Either an opportunity presented itself for her and Dash to be together, or her feelings changed. Both seemed rather unlikely.

Twilight looked up to see that it was early evening, and she had been circling a fountain at the center of an empty town square. The first few snowflakes of the season drifted down and landed on her nose as a chill breeze began to pick up. She turned and started towards her library to get to work, the beautiful fluffy snow flakes now transformed into a stinging horde by the harsh and unforgiving wind.

Author's Note

Sorry for the horrible delay. I kinda slacked off for a week then spent the weekend rewatching finale songs constantly before tackling the writer's block. I hate it when people don't update regularly which is why I considered writing the whole story and posting all at once, but I'd never get it done without the guilt. This is the first part of what was going to be one chapter before I split it. This is the spot on my outline that was pretty much blank. Everything from Twilight leaving her bedroom to the cliffhanger of the next chapter is just me writing and seeing where it goes since I figured a 1 paragraph glossed over time skip was inappropriate. As for the chapter itself, I think I may have gone a bit too much author avatar rant at the beginning. After a second read through, I'm noticing a lot more of the sarcastic and flippant humor from before that I totally didn't even do intentionally. It just kinda ended up in there. Next chapter might be slightly shorter, but should come out sometime this weekend.

Chapter 6

The remaining weeks ticked by painfully as Twilight implemented her plan of inaction. The only bright silver lining was that she at least had a project again. Whenever she awoke from a particularly powerful Rainbow Dash related dream, or felt she might not make it through the rest of the day, she threw herself into working on the talisman. Storing multiple charges of a spell on an object wasn't the easiest of magical tasks, and a lesser unicorn might have needed a full week or two to work on it. However, given her natural talents and the energy with which she was throwing herself at the task, Twilight had finished the basic enchantment within a couple days.

Still, she needed a focus for her nervous energy. She quickly set about designing all manner of improvements. First she improved the capacity, allowing the pendant to store up to forty charges of the cloud walking spell. Next she had added some basic safety features. If a charge was about to wear off, a quick altimeter spell would activate and trigger the next charge if the wearer was still in the air. Finally, she had layered on some extra charms to the pendant itself, giving it extra durability, resistance to tarnishing and rust, and even the ability to glow in the dark, for no other reason than she could.

Packing all that magical energy into such a small object, intricately weaving the different spells to work together in the most efficient manner, it had been fun and challenging. She beamed with pride when she finally met with Dash for the clandestine drop off. She had done her best not to brag as she mentioned all the extra features she had added. The praise Dash had lavished upon her, including calling her the Rainbow Dash of magic, had left her in a pleasantly giddy state all the way back to the library. Then she remembered what her creation was going to be used for, and had to go draw a steaming hot bath.

Now it was Hearth's Warming Eve. Twilight walked through the door of the town hall, into the small party taking place. None of her friends were here. Pinkie was off visiting relatives on the rock farm, or whatever strange place she was claiming as her origin recently, and promised she would make up for the lack of a proper party when she got back. Rarity had been asked by Fancy Pants himself to come by and design custom ensembles for several of Canterlot's social elite who would be attending a fancy, high class party of their own. Rainbow Dash and Applejack were no doubt out there somewhere in the night sky putting her gift to use. She had no idea where Fluttershy was.

Twilight grabbed some free food and punch and made a quick pass over the room. There didn't seem to be any conversations she was interested in joining, and even though Vinyl Scratch was always on top of her game, she just didn't feel much like dancing. After five more minutes of staring out over the crowd, she finally gave up, grabbed a few more bites to eat and one more cup of punch, and left.

Stepping outside into the cold moonlight, she decided that she wasn't quite ready to go home yet. It was cold, but still. Without any wind, it was actually fairly pleasant. Great weather to go for a walk. As she headed off in no direction in particular, she became fixated on the vapor her breath formed in the chill night air. Soon she was breathing out small clouds and using her magic to sculpt them into various shapes. Small hearts floated about her head before dissipating.

I bet the clouds look beautiful from above in this moonlight. She thought to herself as a small pegasus shaped cloud of breath disintegrated before her. She gave a long sigh, not bothering to sculpt the resulting vapor. Was this what her nights were going to be from now on?

There was a sudden rustling in the bushes up ahead. Twilight braced herself, horn at the ready. It was probably just a cat or something, but it never hurt to be careful. To her surprise, out of the bush hopped a butter yellow pegasus with a bubblegum pink mane.

"Fluttershy? What are you doing out here?"

"Oh! Twilight. I didn't see you there. I'm sorry if I startled you. I was just, um, checking in on the critters to make sure their hibernation is going well."

"And you're doing this now, in the middle of the night, instead of going to the party back there?"

Fluttershy shrunk back a bit, attempting to hide behind her mane. "Well, I don't really like parties too much. They're just so...loud. And there's all those other ponies there. I only really go to Pinkie's parties because you girls are there. I'd much rather be out here checking on the animals."

"Well you're certainly not missing much at that party anyway. Good luck with your inspection." Twilight turned to go.

"Wait!" Twilight paused for a second at the shout, which brought Fluttershy's voice up to almost normal levels of conversational volume. "I was wondering...since you're not doing anything...since it gets really dark and scary and lonely out here....I mean if you want to..."

"Sure I'll walk with you. It's no problem." She was bored anyway, and not quite ready to turn in for the night.

The two ponies walked together through the night. Fluttershy looked much calmer now that she no longer had to wander through the darkness on her own. The shy pegasus began to talk about the specific needs of all the little animals as they visited bushes, dens, and trees, and she stuck her head inside to check on the peacefully sleeping occupants. Twilight listened politely, her attention fading only once or twice when she thought she had seen the shadow of two ponies move across the moon. It was probably just her mind playing tricks on her.

They finished up their rounds and started heading back to Fluttershy's cottage. The night was really starting to get cold. They had unconsciously started walking closer together, and Twilight could feel Fluttershy shivering next to her. It seemed to be affecting the pegasus much more. Whereas Twilight could feel her own cheeks starting to turn red from the cold, Fluttershy's were bright and rosy. Removing her own scarf, she levitated it over and tied it around Fluttershy's exposed neck. For a second, it looked like the yellow mare's cheeks flashed brighter before she mumbled out a quiet thank you.

After dropping Fluttershy off at her cottage, Twilight turned and went back to the library. Finally ready for bed, she silently crawled upstairs, careful not to wake Spike, and climbed into her welcoming covers. She hoped Dash was enjoying herself and had a wonderful Hearth's Warming.

***

Twilight fell into a steady holding pattern over the next few months. It was often painful, and she frequently had to fall back on boiling her brains out. The worst parts were the dreams that struck without warning. Sometimes they were tragic. Dash was missing, lost, or in some kind of terrible danger and she tried and failed to help.

What was worse were the happy ones. Scenarios of the two together and happy played in her mind before being abruptly cut off. Sometimes she would have a moment of clarity right before waking up, realize that everything was going to disappear, and hold onto dream Dash as tight as she could as the world went white. The worst part of all was that even though she always woke in tears, she found herself wishing it would happen again every night as she went to sleep.

She would describe it as unbearable if not for the fact that she did in fact bear through it out of necessity. Over time, it just became the normal state of affairs. She endured it as if it was an old injury or medical condition. Just something she lived with. Life continued until Hearts and Hooves day arrived.

***

It had been a very long day. Twilight's organizational skills had made the mayor call upon her to setup and organize a kind of carnival event at the town square for all the couples in town. There were games and contests for couples to compete in, and a large after party. Not only had she had to suffer through all the happy lovestruck ponies, Dash and Applejack had dominated most of the events and won the title of "Ponyville's Best Couple". And since the mayor couldn't be bothered to do anything herself, the official event organizer had to present them with their trophy. Twilight was ready to make an early night of it when a knock sounded at her door. She opened it to find a nervous looking (more than usual) Fluttershy.

"H-hi Twilight. C-c-can I come in and talk for a minute?" Fluttershy managed to stammer out, looking as though she might fly off any moment.

Twilight gave a quick nod and a "sure" before stepping aside and letting Fluttershy in. The timid pegasus walked in as though she were entering a cave full of dragons. She took a seat on the couch and took a few deep breaths before trying to continue.

"I was wondering if...that is if you don't mind....I really..." Fluttershy gave a small squeak and mumbled something inaudible under her breath, eyes hidden behind long strands of her mane.

"Don't worry Fluttershy, you can tell me whatever it is." Twilight did her best to reassure the frightened mare. Maybe she needed help with something important but was just afraid to ask.

Fluttershy took a deep breath and paused.

"IreallyreallylikeyoualotandhaveforalongtimeandIwaswonderingifyouwouldmaybegooutwithmesometime." Silence hung in the air as Twilight stood there, mouth agape. "Um, if that's okay with you that is." Fluttershy blushed back at her.

The gears of Twilight's mind spun but found no traction. Desperately they tried to analyze what had just happened and create an appropriate response. Instead, only one thought surfaced.

Uh oh.

Author's Note

Short chapter to wrap up the sorta filler spot. For some reason I put off doing anything this weekend, including writing this. For some reason I said I'd post something this weekend and I don't want to be too much of a liar, so I'm blazing this out now and posting it without so much as an edit read through. I know it's not really the weekend anymore, but it still counts if I don't sleep yet. Probably a bad idea. After a second person complained I decided to remove italics from speech. I'll go back and edit them out of other chapters later. I make no promises at all about next chapter, but maybe next weekend? I gotta go sleep now so I can teach classes in the morning.

Chapter 7

Think think think think think think think! Don't just leave her hanging there, say something! Twilight searched her brain for something to say. Something compassionate, meaningful, and articulate.

"...What?" Great job there brain, really coming through for me in my hour of need.

Fortunately, this seemed to prompt Fluttershy to repeat herself much more slowly. Twilight had actually heard and understood her confession perfectly fine, but she desperately needed the time to get her thoughts together. Fluttershy's occasional stammering, combined with her frequent hesitant pauses and backpedaling that would normally try the patience of most ponies, were now blessings that worked to stave off the impending awkward silence for a few more seconds. Giving about 10% of her attention to listening, Twilight started thinking faster than she had in a long time.

Fluttershy liked her. No, Fluttershy had romantic feelings for her. Why her? Why wasn't important, she could ask about that later. The important thing right now was that these feelings existed. According to Fluttershy, these feelings had existed for a while now. How long? There had probably been signs. Little hints that she should have picked up on but didn't notice because she was too wrapped up in her own problems. She searched her recent memories for clues. Had Fluttershy been shy or nervous around her recently? It was hard to tell, given her normally timid nature.

Twilight felt a wave of guilt for being so neglectful a friend as to miss something so important, but quickly squashed it. This wasn't a productive line of thinking. It didn't matter when they started, these feelings existed now and needed to be addressed. Fluttershy needed an answer.

Okay, just tell her how you feel. Quick, clean, honest answer.

The challenge was figuring out exactly how it was she felt. She had never thought about Fluttershy that way before, but she didn't have difficulty imagining it now. The fact that she didn't feel the exact same way now was no reason to reject her out of hoof. They got along well enough. It was plausible that she could develop stronger feelings over time. There was of course the significant problem of her still being crazy for Dash.

Part of her mind screamed that saying yes would be tantamount to cheating on Dash. She had to remind herself that Dash was not in a relationship with her, and at this rate probably never would be, so it was impossible to cheat on her. Still, the thought of getting another marefriend felt like a betrayal, if not to Dash, then to herself and her own feelings that she had started to accept as a core part of her identity. She was Twilight Sparkle, talented at magic, exceedingly well read, personal student to Celestia, and madly in love with Rainbow Dash.

Twilight realized this wasn't a healthy reaction. If she made pain an important part of who she was, she would never allow herself to be happy again. She needed to find somepony else, to get out there and try dating before these toxic sentiments could calcify any further, before she doomed herself to a lifetime of pining away in misery. But should that somepony be Fluttershy? It would be cruel to treat her and her feelings so cavalierly by making her only a quick rebound.

"-was hoping you might go out with me sometime."

Twilight snapped back to attention and realized that Fluttershy had finished talking and was now looking at her expectantly. The pitiful pegasus stood there, doing her best not to show the trembling in her legs. Her knees were locked and her wings were pressed firmly against her sides, as if to keep her from galloping out the door or flying right out the window. Twilight realized that the poor pony was probably trying to keep herself from doing just that.

Standing here probably took every scrap of courage she had. Twilight wondered if she would fare any better in the same situation. Was this how she would look to Dash? Had Fluttershy been dreaming about her every night? Been agonizing over what to say? How many weeks had it taken for her to work up the courage to come over and knock on the library door? How many more would it take to get past the devastation of rejection?

Another glance at the still trembling Fluttershy tore Twilight's heart in half. Her head filled with visions of Fluttershy running away in tears, spending weeks locked in her house and crying into her pillow. She couldn't bear to let that happen. What kind of monster would she be? At that moment, she wanted nothing more than to jump forward and give Fluttershy a reassuring hug, tell her that everything would be alright, make everything alright. And she had the power to do so. All she had to do was say yes. The alternative was unthinkable really. Nopony should have to go through the same suffering she had over Dash, much less one as fragile as Fluttershy. She didn't have the strength of will to inflict that on anypony. She couldn't say no.

NO! Twilight's conscience shouted inside her head. Whatever you do, you cannot start a relationship built on pity. It will only breed resentment and hurt her more in the end. No matter how much it hurts, it's better to stop it here instead of stringing her along on a lie. Do not accept unless you actually mean it!

Would she actually mean it though? Twilight still didn't know how she felt about a relationship with Fluttershy. She realized that she had been painfully lonely lately. She did want a marefriend, and Fluttershy could more than adequately fill that role. She had already told herself that she needed to go out and try dating. Was it really fair to reject Fluttershy for caring too much? To say 'sorry Fluttershy, I'd date you if only you liked me a little less'?

Then again, she didn't see her attachment to Rainbow Dash fading away soon. She would probably start unintentionally comparing Fluttershy unfavorably. She might even start resenting her for not being Dash. She certainly wouldn't make a good marefriend if she was pining away for somepony else all the time. Another horrifying thought came to her. What if while she was dating Fluttershy, Dash became available again? Dumping Fluttershy to pursue Dash would be a horrible thing, but Twilight knew she would probably do it. Dash probably wouldn't think too well of her for that, but Twilight wouldn't hesitate if it somehow ended up with the two of them together.

Twilight didn't know what to do. Every option seemed like the wrong one. She looked again at Fluttershy, who was fidgeting uncomfortably. It had been about ten seconds of silence. She was running out of time. She needed to respond. Unable to come to a decision, she decided she would just be as honest as she could.

"Well...I...I don't know."

Fluttershy gave a puzzled expression of equal parts hope and fear.

"I'm not sure if I'd make a very good marefriend."

Fluttershy opened her mouth to say that she would be a wonderful marefriend, but Twilight quickly cut her off.

"You see, there's already somepony that I like, but I can't exactly be with them because of...certain reasons. It's very unlikely that I'll ever be able to be with them." That last admission stung as she said it aloud. Fluttershy shifted, unsure whether this was leading to a yes or a no.

"so...that means that...?"

"What I'm trying to say is that I'm not against giving us a shot, but it might not work out. I might be distant, thinking about this other pony, and that wouldn't be fair to you."

"But you'd still be with me right? Still give it a chance?"

"Yes, but you'd always be second in my thoughts! Even if it's unlikely, if I had a chance to be with them instead I'd take it. You shouldn't want a marefriend like that. It would be horrible!"

"Well...if I'm second, that would still mean you care a lot about me right? You just care about this other pony more."

"Yes, of course. I would still care about you."

"And we could still do things together like a couple?" Fluttershy's cheeks turned a bright pink.

"Well, yes but-"

"Then yes." Fluttershy's face hardened with a look of determination.

"Sorry?"

"Yes. If you're okay with it, and if there's any chance at all things could work out, then I'm willing to take that chance no matter what the risk. I understand if you don't feel the same way, but I want to try." Twilight had trouble believing that the resolute mare in front of her was the same shy pony known to cower at the sight of her own shadow.

"Well...if you're okay with that, then I guess I'm willing to try as well." Twilight was suddenly startled by the yellow forelegs thrown around her neck as Fluttershy leaped forward.

"Oh thank you so much Twilight! Thank you thank you thank you thank you!"

Twilight already started to feel guilt and regret knotting her stomach. She had tried to deflect responsibility by making it Fluttershy's decision, but what kind of choice was it really? Of course she would say yes. She could hardly expect Fluttershy to rationally and objectively weigh the potential pros and cons on the spot. If Dash had made her a similar offer, she would have jumped on it without a second thought. She would see any kind of relationship with Dash, no matter how dysfunctional, as preferable to nothing. It could possibly be more painful in the long term, but nopony could be expected to make that call correctly.

After making plans for a first date Saturday afternoon, Fluttershy had left, literally walking on air, and wearing a smile so large it looked almost painful. Twilight still had no idea if she had done the right thing. She felt terrible, but doubted she would feel much better if things had gone any differently. She walked upstairs, knowing she wouldn't be getting much in the way of sleep tonight.

***

Twilight waited by the fountain in the center of town. She had been waiting for about 15 minutes. Not because Fluttershy was late, the arranged meeting time wasn't for another 10 minutes, Twilight had simply found herself sitting around the library doing nothing while waiting for the time to leave. She had figured she might as well get some sunlight and fresh air instead of driving Spike crazy with her pacing.

They had agreed to meet here, where Fluttershy would fill her in on what they would be doing. She had insisted that their main activity for the day remain a surprise, though she had at least told Twilight that there wouldn't be any need to dress up. Seeing the pony in question walking up the road towards her, Twilight guessed that she had probably had the same problem.

"Oh, Twilight. I didn't think you would be here yet."

"Yeah, I wasn't doing anything so I thought I'd just head over early."

"Me too. I almost didn't because Rarity said I should be 'fashionably late'. Sh-should we wait?"

Twilight gave a small internal groan. She wasn't surprised that Rarity knew, she and Fluttershy's were very close after all, but things were going to get tedious and complicated if she insisted on giving her special brand of 'advice'.

"No, there's no reason we can't start early as long as we're both here," Twilight responded before adding "besides, this way we get to spend even more time together."

Her last comment had put a smile on Fluttershy's now blushing face and Twilight was glad she was off to such a good start. Fluttershy quickly explained that their main activity for the day wouldn't be ready for a little while longer and suggested a brief nature walk to fill the time. Finding it a perfectly agreeable idea, Twilight let her lead the way. It was the same as any other walk they had taken as friends. Since they already knew each other well, they were able to skip completely past the awkward getting to know each other phase, to their mutual relief, and fall right into comfortable conversation.

Not paying attention to where she was walking, Twilight accidentally bumped up against Fluttershy's side, and heard what sounded like a sharp, but nearly silent gasp. A quick sideways glance at Fluttershy's glowing cheeks confirmed it. Continuing on as if she hadn't noticed, Twilight got a devious idea to have a little fun and make their walk more entertaining. As their walk continued, Twilight would pretend to be distracted by the conversation while she brushed up against Fluttershy or 'accidentally' whipped her tail against her side while turning to look at an interesting sight. Twilight grinned as she pretended to be oblivious to the symphony of adorable squeaks she was pulling out of the poor pony. She was practically playing her like an instrument and it felt good. Twilight knew she probably shouldn't tease her like this, but Fluttershy certainly didn't look like she had any objections. She finally gave the beleaguered pegasus a break.

Having led them back into the center of town, Fluttershy finally revealed her surprise. Two passes for a free day at the spa. Fluttershy and Rarity had apparently visited enough times to become diamond club members, which came with several vouchers for free visits for them and their friends. Twilight had to admit, Fluttershy knew how to plan a good date. They spent the day being pampered. Hooficures, facials, massages, but the very best part was the large hot tub. As she slid into the steamy, turbulent waters, Twilight felt tensions flowing out of muscles she didn't even know she had. She quickly found a nice jet to settle down and melt in front of.

Closing her eyes for a few minutes, she started to hear an intermittent sloshing sound just barely audible over the jets. It came irregularly, but usually no less than forty five seconds apart, and in short, quick bursts. She cracked an eye open to see Fluttershy hesitantly trying to inch herself closer, wearing a look of nervous apprehension that had no business being in such a relaxing environment. With a grin, Twilight slid herself sideways and wrapped a foreleg around her. Fluttershy gave a short, startled "eep" but soon relaxed and leaned her head against Twilight's shoulder, giving a contented sigh.

Things were definitely going better than expected for Twilight. Her ego was certainly satisfied. It felt good to know that somepony liked her so much that she could manipulate their mood with her slightest action. She could make Fluttershy tense or relaxed at will. It made her feel important, powerful, and she was enjoying exercising that power. More specifically, she was enjoying using it to make Fluttershy happy. She looked even more adorable than normal as she rested against Twilight's shoulder.

Hunger eventually overcame both of them and they set out in search of dinner. They settled on a small nearby restaurant, respectable, but not overly stuffy. They had good food and good conversation. Wanting to see how bright she could make Fluttershy blush again, Twilight decided to work in a compliment of her beautiful eyes. The answer was very very bright. As they left the restaurant, Twilight thought she saw something out of the corner of her eye. She also had the strange feeling that she was being watched.

As they continued walking, no set destination in mind, just letting their food settle, the feeling of being watched grew. As she turned to look behind her, Twilight swore she saw a flash of white and pink in her peripheral vision. All she saw now was a bush with a stylish camouflage hat sticking out of the top and a very suspicious looking crate with an exclamation mark painted on it.

"It seems we have a couple of nosy spies." She muttered under her breath to Fluttershy.

"What? Who? Where?" Fluttershy looked about in confusion.

"Pinkie and Rarity. It seems they've been following us since the restaurant."

"What should we do?"

"I've got an idea. Just hold still."

Twilight's horn began to glow as she started focusing magic into it. A violet aura began to grow until it surrounded both of them. Then the world briefly blinked out of existence before snapping back into place with different scenery. Fluttershy stumbled a bit, dizzy from the unfamiliar experience, and fell against Twilight who had moved to catch her.

"W-What happened?"

"I teleported us back to the library. I thought we'd give them the slip and hang around here for a while until they give up and go home. I hope you don't mind. I just don't like the idea of being followed all the way to your place."

"Oh no, that's perfectly alright with me. I would have been uncomfortable being watched as well."

They both went inside and said hello to Spike, who was just on his way to bed. He made them some tea before bidding them goodnight and heading up to his room. They enjoyed their tea in peace, speculating on how Pinkie and Rarity were doing. The conversation eventually turned to the work Twilight did in the library. Before she knew it, Twilight was showing off her lab and explaining what all the different pieces of equipment did. She almost never let anypony else in her lab. She rarely let Spike come down here, and that was only when she really need the assistance.

"Wow...It's all so impressive Twilight. You're even more talented than I thought." Now it was Twilight's turn to hide her blushing.

It had been two hours before they finally noticed the time. It was getting late. Pinkie and Rarity had surely given up and gone home by now, and Fluttershy needed to get home so she could take care of her animals in the morning. Magically tucking away the deck of playing cards they had been using, Twilight followed Fluttershy out the door. She could easily fly home on her own, or Twilight could have easily teleported them both to Fluttershy's house, but there was no need to rush. No reason not to squeeze one last walk out of the night.

It was slow going. It was obvious that Fluttershy was trying to drag out the night with a more than leisurely pace. Twilight didn't mind though, she was perfectly content to enjoy the fresh night air and admire the moon and stars. The path ahead of them was lit by a brilliant full moon, and the stars hung like dazzling jewels in the soft mix of black and dark blue hues that made up the night sky. Luna was really on her game tonight. Soon she was pointing out the various constellations to Fluttershy, slowing their pace even further as she stopped to trace a hoof through the air and lecture about astronomy and the history of navigation.

After mentioning that the stars were never this visible from Canterlot, because of all the light pollution, Twilight encountered one of those rare moments where she couldn't think of anything else to say. Fluttershy had nothing to add, so they walked on in silence. The only sound came from hooves hitting cobblestone. The hypnotic rhythm lulled them both into a serene state of calm. When the sharp sounds of cobblestone shifted to the muted thuds of a dirt road, signaling that they were almost at their destination, the calm faded from Fluttershy's face. She slowed to a crawl and finally stopped.

"Something wrong Fluttershy?"

"It's...It's just that, well...I really don't want this night to end. I know it has to eventually, but I'm scared that...that...no, never mind, I'm just being silly." Fluttershy attempted to shrink back into her mane.

"What? What is it?"

"Well...I'm...kinda afraid that I'm going to wake up soon, or that when I go to bed and wake up in the morning, I won't be able to tell if any of this was real." Hearing how ridiculous her words sounded out loud, she quickly turned away.

Chuckling to herself, Twilight plucked a nearby flower and magically changed its colors to a swirling pattern of violet, yellow, and pink. There was no way anypony would think it was natural. "Here. Keep this with you, and you'll know it wasn't a dream." She lowered the flower into Fluttershy's mane and with as much casual smoothness as she could muster, said "Besides, if tonight never ends, then how are we ever going to go on a second date?"

If Fluttershy's smile had been any brighter, Luna would be having angry words with Celestia as to why Equestria suddenly had a second sun that was cutting off her night. "Really? You really want to go out again? With me? Again?"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "No, with Angel. Of course with you. It was a lot of fun and I'd like to do it again."

After a quick aerial somersault, Fluttershy touched down and started walking again. Turning quietly around the large chicken coop, the cottage came into view, a large dark shadow against the treeline of the Everfree forest. A small lantern hung from a post by the front porch, a guiding light for darker nights when the moon wasn't quite so bright. From inside came the quiet sounds of many sleeping animals. They finally reached the front door, said their goodnights, and stood there. Twilight waited for Fluttershy to open the door and go inside, while Fluttershy seemed to be nervously waiting for Twilight to do something.

Is she waiting on me? What does she want? Wait, is she expecting me to...am I supposed to...uh oh. She tried to look to Fluttershy for some kind of cue, but all she saw was anxiety. Okay, so she's definitely not making the first move. You're gonna have to take charge on this. You can do this Sparkle.

With only a small intake of breath as a warning, Twilight tilted her head a few degrees, pushed her lips against Fluttershy's, and felt...nothing. Sure there was a tactile sensation, she felt lips against her own, but that was it. Her head wasn't filled with fireworks. Quite the contrary, she was clear, lucid, and able to examine every second of the experience. Fluttershy's lips didn't taste sweet, divine, ambrosial, or anything even slightly poetic. They didn't taste like anything at all. They felt like what one would expect mucus membrane covered skin to feel like. Soft, squishy, and moist. Overall, it felt as if she were pressing her mouth against slightly warm, damp rubber.

Twilight wondered if one or both of them were just bad kissers, but Fluttershy appeared to be having quite a different experience. The unexpected force of the kiss had pushed her back into a sitting position with her back to the door, which was being pressed into quite forcefully by her now fully flared wings. She seemed lost in a daze, her eyes closed, clearly enjoying herself. Twilight took this all in as her eyes darted about, having nothing in particular to focus on, and wondered how long she was expected to keep this up. Finally, a break for air gave her a chance for an exit. With another hastily uttered goodnight, Twilight teleported out of sight, leaving a speechless Fluttershy on her front porch to stare dreamily into space for several minutes.

Lacking the focus to teleport all the way back to the library at the moment, Twilight Sparkle reappeared down the road and just out of sight of the cottage. She mulled over the events of the evening as she walked home. Things had gone well, great actually. She had enjoyed herself, and she was telling the truth when she had said she wanted to try it again.

Then there was that kiss. Why had it felt so wrong? So lifeless? Did she have damaged or missing nerves in her lips, leading to a complete lack of erogenous response that others had? Was it something that was supposed to get better with practice? Was Fluttershy just a terrible kisser? Since it was her first kiss, she didn't exactly have any prior data to compare.

Twilight stopped dead in her tracks as a realization struck her like a wave of cold water. That was her first kiss. Her first kiss, and it hadn't been with Dash. Feelings of guilt and betrayal began to rise once again in her mind.

No! This is ridiculous. I have absolutely no reason to feel guilty over this. This is exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. Besides, first kisses aren't even important, I don't even care about those kind of things. It's better to get them out of the way to start getting experience and become better at it anyway. Then I'll be really skilled and able to impress Dash when we're finally together.

Twilight paused again. Where had that last thought come from? Had she been thinking of Fluttershy as practice? Training in how to be a marefriend? Was she honestly going into this relationship expecting it to fail so she could resume her futile pursuit of Dash? Twilight didn't like what her introspection was starting to dig up. Part of her did want things to work out, for her to actually develop stronger feelings for Fluttershy, and for them to be happy together. But far more, she still wanted to be with Dash, which meant she wanted failure of both of their current relationships.

It wasn't right. Her best case scenario shouldn't involve breaking things off with Fluttershy and having her be okay with it because Fluttershy had spontaneously stopped loving her. Twilight continued walking home, trying desperately to regain some of the happiness that had characterized the rest of the day. There was always the second best scenario, that if she couldn't be with the pony she loved, she would someday come to her senses and love the pony she was with.

***

It was almost noon by the time Twilight woke up. It seemed she had been up far later than she thought. In the fog of her groggy mind a thought nagged at her. It felt as if there was something she had forgotten to do, something important she was supposed to have taken care of at the earliest opportunity. She couldn't imagine what it was. The library wasn't officially open today and there was nothing written on her calendar. She dismissed it as she rolled out of bed and gave a long stretch, a satisfying pop coming from the area between her shoulders. If she kept sleeping in this late, she wouldn't be able to yell at Spike with a straight face anymore. As she emerged downstairs, she saw the dragon in question reclining on the couch and flipping through the large Sunday edition of the Ponyville Express.

"So, I take it your date with Fluttershy went alright?"

"What? Who said it was a date?" Twilight didn't like the assumption, even if it was completely correct.

"Right. I'm sure the fact that I had to re-shelve the first four volumes of 'The Egghead's Guide to Dating' yesterday was a complete coincidence." Twilight refused to dignify such ridiculous airtight deduction with an answer. Maybe that had been what she forgot to do? "Anyway, somepony left a note for you at the door. I left it on the table."

Twilight walked over to the kitchen table where she saw an envelope covered in bright polka dots. Inside was a note written in bright pink crayon and a familiar sloppy mouthwriting.

Twilight! Please come to Sugarcube Corner at exactly noon. It's super duper important! You have to be there for stuff! Important stuff! I mean, it probably won't be the end of Equestria if you don't show up, but it could be!

She wasn't sure what it was Pinkie wanted, but it wasn't as if she had made any other plans for the day. A quick glance at the clock revealed that she only had about a minute until noon. Charging out the door, she summoned some magic and flung herself through space, arriving just up the street from Sugarcube Corner. There was a reason she had never been tardy to a class.

She was surprised to see Fluttershy arriving from the other direction, a note with bright pink text held under her wing. After sharing a quick hello and a look of concern, they headed for the door. This was odd. Had each of their friends gotten a similar note? No, if they had they should all be arriving at the same time. What could Pinkie need that required both Fluttershy and herself to arrive at the same time? The pieces suddenly fell into place and Twilight remembered what she had forgotten to do, but it was too late. Fluttershy had already pushed open the door to the darkened room.

"SURPRISE!" Twilight was nearly bowled over from the concussive force of a large number of ponies yelling at her. With the lights now on, she could see that half the town was there. There was a large banner hanging from the ceiling with the words "Congratulations Twilight + Fluttershy" stretched across it and covered in hearts. Of course Pinkie would want to throw a party for them, and of course she would invite as many ponies as she could. Twilight had forgotten to intercept her and ask her to hold on the party. She had meant to do it, if not immediately after the date, then first thing in the early morning, but somehow she had forgotten. She had started worrying about that kiss and then had been so tired when she got home that she had gone straight to bed.

As she walked deeper into the sea of smiling faces and congratulations, Fluttershy cringing at her side, all she could think was that this was bad. Very bad. She hadn't exactly planned to keep it a secret forever, but that didn't mean she wanted it broadcast to all of Equestria! They had only had one date, but now they were the hot new couple of Ponyville. Now everypony knew and they all had expectations. If things didn't work out, she wouldn't just be crushing Fluttershy, she'd be letting down everypony in town. They had to work out now. Or at least continue on until they were no longer newsworthy.

Finally, she saw what she had been dreading most. The sea of ponies parted, and Twilight could see a beaming Rainbow Dash walking her direction. Panic put an icy grip on all her internal organs and sent her pulse racing. She had to suppress the urge to teleport away that instant and hide under a bed somewhere.

"Hey Twilight! Congratulations! I was wondering when you'd finally find a special somepony of your own. I've been friends with Fluttershy since flight school, and let me tell you, you couldn't have picked a better pony to fall for." Twilight felt that she deserved some kind of acting award for managing not to cringe.

But I did!

If only Dash knew how cruel her kind words really were. "Same goes for you Fluttershy. I always knew you'd land a nice catch, and I gotta say, you've got good taste." Dash added with a wink and a nudge. Was Dash doing this on purpose? Was this some kind of cruel joke? It was amazing how a compliment that would normally make Twilight swoon could be so devastating with a little context. "Well enjoy the party. If you'll excuse me, a certain apple farmer now owes me ten bits."

As she watched the oblivious pegasus fly off to collect on her wager, Twilight felt herself and Fluttershy being herded by the party goers towards an impromptu stage in the center of the room. The plywood raised on cinderblocks, the large banner overhead, the tables full of refreshments, they all triggered a sense of deja vu. Of course, there was no confusion over where she had seen these familiar elements before. It was still permanently etched in her mind as the worst day of her life. Now up on top of the stage, her horror grew as she realized what the crowd was expecting from her. The happy couple was supposed to give some kind of speech and then kiss.

She couldn't do that. She might be able to cobble together a few words about being surprised by their turnout and support, but she couldn't just kiss Fluttershy up on stage. Not with half the town watching her. Not with Dash watching her! Twilight looked out at the crowd of gawking faces, their eager eyes boring into her, and began to feel resentment, then anger. She wasn't there to perform for their entertainment. Didn't any of them find this intrusive? How was her personal life any of their business anyway?!

The worst part was that she knew they all really did mean well. They all wanted to support her and thought this party was a wonderful idea. It hadn't even been their idea though. They had been assembled and organized by a certain pink ringleader to whom Twilight owed her current position. As she spotted Pinkie happily bouncing in the crowd, Twilight's anger started to grow, until it was suddenly cut off by a whimpering noise next to her.

Glancing to her right, she saw a quivering Fluttershy huddling by her side for security, and looking as though she might faint any second. That was quickly becoming a real possibility as her breathing indicated that she was starting to hyperventilate. Now that the crowd had started to quiet down, Twilight could hear a faint and desperate whispering between gasps.

"T-Twi-light! Please. H-H-Help!"

Even if Twilight hadn't been able to hear, the look Fluttershy gave her would have said it all. Eyes wide with fear, she was looking to Twilight as her savior, her one and only hope of rescue. A protective instinct moved inside Twilight and stirred her to action. She might have stayed and suffered through this party if it was just her own misery she had to worry about, but if Fluttershy didn't want to be here either, she wasn't going to stay a second longer than necessary.

"Thank you all for coming but it seems Fluttershy isn't feeling very well and I just remembered I think I left the sink on fire! GOODBYE!" And with a flash of magic, the stage was empty.

***

There was a bright flash in the center of the library, followed by the appearance of two ponies. Twilight felt something wet pressing into her side and saw that Fluttershy had grabbed onto her and was now crying into her side, sobs partially muffled by her lavender coat. Twilight guided them over to the couch to give Fluttershy time to finish, and herself a chance to breathe. After a few minutes, the crying subsided and her breathing became slow and regular again.

"I'm sorry. Sorry I ruined our party."

"Don't be. I actually didn't want to stay there either."

"I'm also sorry about...this." Fluttershy gestured at Twilight's dampened and tear stained coat.

"No problem at all. Besides, I think I have some towels upstairs anyway. Come on."

As they headed up the stairs, Twilight paused, noticing something stuck to her door. Upon closer examination, she found it was actually two somethings. A note and a scroll. The note was from Spike. He had stepped out to get a few groceries and restock their stationery supply. It seemed that as he was about to leave, a message from Princess Celestia had arrived, so he stuck it on her door with the note. Twilight wondered what the princess could possibly want as she quickly opened the scroll and began to read aloud.

My faithful student Twilight Sparkle,

It has recently come to my attention that you have finally found somepony special, and have started your first romantic relationship. I can not tell you how happy I am that you have taken this step. To be honest, I was concerned that you might never express any interest in the subject, and would deprive yourself of a world of new experiences. You have grown so much in your studies of friendship from the filly who would spend all day isolated in the tower, but there is still more to a young mare's life. I wish all the best to you and Fluttershy. May you both bring each other great happiness in the days to come.

Twilight's right eye gave a small twitch. She briefly pondered if this situation could get any worse until she noticed the post script.

PS: Your parents wanted me to send along their congratulations as well. They are thrilled and can not wait to hear more about the mysterious mare who has, as they put it, "thawed the heart of the ice queen". Your father is not yet entirely convinced that she is not some kind of golem made out of books.

Calmly and silently, Twilight rolled up the scroll with her magic, opened the door to her room, and gently deposited the scroll and note on her nightstand. Without a word, or even a flicker of emotion across her features, she walked slowly and purposefully over to the side of her bed, climbed in, and pulled one of her pillows over her head. She heard the muffled sounds of hoofsteps on the floor and felt the weight of Fluttershy dropping onto the bed beside her and pulling the other pillow over her own head. Twilight reached behind her to lazily throw the covers over both of them, and Sheetland welcomed its two miserable diarchs.

Author's Note

So I am so incredibly sorry for dropping off the face of the earth. For the first part, I was just slacking off and playing way too much Old Republic. Then I had to handle some crisis involving school and have just finished moving. Actually still unloading some stuff into a house. I look back at where exactly it was chapter 6 ended and fell extra horrible for sticking everyone with a cliffhanger for so long. I'll try not to do that again. You may have noticed this chapter is longer than usual. I wanted to cram a bunch of stuff in here because I had the weird idea that I should fit this story into 10 chapters. I'm splitting the last part of this off into the next chapter because there are enough major events in this chapter as it is and that 10 chapter idea is stupid. Again, I feel bad about the wait. To make it up to you, check out this awesome PMV I made at someone's request. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWvhQMhiNPM It's from Les Miserables and is pretty much this story in PMV form but with FlutterDash instead.

Chapter 8

Twilight woke up feeling unusually warm. She also seemed to be breathing rather loudly until a brief beat in the rhythm revealed that the sound was coming from somepony else. A turn of her neck to glance behind her revealed Fluttershy sleeping peacefully beside her, the bedsheets in disarray, with her yellow forelegs wrapped around Twilight's midsection. Demanding to know how such a scene had occurred, Twilight's now very awake brain quickly dove into the archives of her memory for an explanation. Momentary relief came as she found her explanation, but she almost wished she hadn't as the rest of the details of the day came back to her. After the horrible events of the day, they had lain here and sulked in silence until they had both fallen asleep. She guessed they had tossed and turned a bit in their sleep, resulting in the rather compromising position Twilight now found herself in.

Twilight's train of thought derailed and her body stiffened as Fluttershy, still fast asleep, leaned in and nuzzled the back of her neck. This wasn't good. Aside from the possibility that Fluttershy might have a heart attack if she woke up like this, given the way the day had been going, she half expected Spike to barge into the room any second and see them. That was, if he hadn't already seen them while they were asleep through the door she had forgotten to close.

A quick heat detection spell failed to detect the flaming belly of a dragon anywhere in the library, meaning he had probably not come home yet. Breathing a small sigh of relief, Twilight shut the door and took stock of the situation. She was stuck facing the wall, Fluttershy's grip preventing her from rolling over, and only able to see the door and the rest of the room by craning her neck over her shoulder at a somewhat uncomfortable angle. A small tug at the back of her neck told her that Fluttershy had started chewing on her mane as well. Trying to slowly wriggle out from Fluttershy's hooves met with no success as small movement only made her squeeze tighter, and large movements risked waking her.

Maybe if I lightly tickle her a bit, she'll roll over and let go? Twilight tried to move her tail over Fluttershy's side, but all she managed to accomplish was to drag it lightly over her cutie mark, eliciting a tiny gasp and an adorable, but highly unsettling moan.

"mmmm...Twilight...." Fluttershy whispered in her sleep.

AH! No no no no no no no! Okay, something else. Using something else. Casting a glance over her shoulder at the rest of the room, Twilight spotted a feather duster in the corner. Bingo. Carefully, she levitated it across the room and began lightly brushing it against her captor.

"Ahhhh...mmmm!" Fluttershy let out a slightly louder and even more disturbing moan directly into Twilight's ear. She felt the legs around her tighten and had to suppress a startled yelp as she felt Fluttershy gently bite into the back of her neck.

Wings! How could I forget about the wings? Stupid! Moving the duster up to the back of Fluttershy's head, Twilight resumed her gentle brushing until the sleeping mare twitched her head and rolled over. Finally free, Twilight silently crawled out of the bed. Now she just needed to figure out what to do with Fluttershy.

She didn't want to wake the peacefully sleeping pony, but at the same time she couldn't just let her stay in her bed. Could she? No. She had told everypony that Fluttershy wasn't feeling well and implied that she was going to take her home to bed. Twilight paused a few seconds to consider the unfortunate double meaning of that statement before shaking her head. She needed to get Fluttershy back to her cottage, if for no other reason than that she was starting to drool (adorably somehow) on the sheets.

Summoning a small amount of magic, Twilight gently touched her horn to Fluttershy's forehead and cast a simple sedation spell, pushing Fluttershy into a much deeper sleep. Now she would be able to sleep through anything else Twilight did like Luna through an apocalyptic crisis. Levitating the sleeping pony to her side, Twilight began focusing for long range teleportation. She couldn't exactly walk down the street carrying an unconscious Fluttershy.

Reaching out with her mind, Twilight visualized the area around Fluttershy's cottage. Fixing on the coordinates of its relative position to the library, she laid down a magical anchor point at both ends of the vector. Once they were both tightly wrapped in the magical field, Twilight severed the anchor at the library, snapping them through subspace to their destination like a stretched rubber band that had just been released.

After the scenery around Fluttershy's cottage had snapped into position around them, Twilight pushed open the door and carried Fluttershy inside. She was immediately greeted by a partially eaten carrot impacting the side of her head. Looking down, she noticed Angel sitting there and giving her a dirty look. She shot a glare right back at him and continued on towards the stairs. Catching another incoming projectile out of the corner of her eyes, she used a small bit of magic to swat it back along its original path and nail the annoying rabbit right between the eyes.

Leaving the stunned animal behind, she continued up the stairs, closing the door behind her and laying Fluttershy down in her bed. After leaving a brief note so she wouldn't be too confused when she woke up, Twilight undid the sedation spell so Fluttershy wouldn't sleep through the rest of the day and wreck her sleep cycle. Quietly slipping out the bedroom door, she used her telekinesis to snatch Angel out of the air, interrupting the flying kick the recovered rabbit had planned as an ambush. Levitating the writhing ball of fur behind her, she dropped him on the couch as she closed the front door behind her.

Now all she had to do was track down Pinkie and explain the concept of discretion. If she was lucky, she might be able to direct the party pony's energy into throwing a party for some other cause that would make everypony move on and make today's announcement old news. It couldn't be too hard to find something Pinkie would want to throw a party over. Glancing back over her shoulder at the cottage, Twilight was relieved that at least the worst seemed to be over.

***

There were more dates to follow in the next several weeks. The arrival of spring had brought plenty of sunny weather, perfect for picnics. The scheduled rain showers provided a perfect excuse for quiet afternoons and evenings indoors, the soft pitter patter of raindrops outside the library serving as a soothing backdrop to various card and board games, or just the enjoyment of a good book.

Fluttershy had become a regular visitor to the library, lending a helping hoof with some of Twilight's experiments, and asking questions that Twilight was always happy to answer in detail. She had been overjoyed when Twilight had shown her the section of the library reserved for biological sciences, including taxonomies and field guides to exotic creatures. Twilight had also found herself spending more time at Fluttershy's cottage, helping to take care of the animals and gaining much more field experience in veterinary medicine than she ever thought she would acquire.

Both had discovered that the other often made trips to visit Zecora. Twilight's studies into magic often required rare ingredients, with special magical properties, that were only found in the Everfree forest. Fluttershy needed a wide variety of medicines that the potion maker could provide, but dreaded the necessary journey through the forest. Since they had started making the trips together, dread had turned into eager anticipation.

Spring had hit Everfree and the branches were heavy with the weight of pink blossoms. They formed an obscuring layer that bathed the well worn path in dappled sunlight. Sometimes a gentle breeze would pick up, dislodging some of the less secure blossoms and creating a gentle rain of petals. On such occasions, Fluttershy walked even closer and stared more dreamily than usual. Twilight had to admit, it was a surprisingly romantic location. It was hard to believe this was the same deadly forest that struck fear in the hearts of most ponies.

Twilight had made an effort to keep track of any changes in her feelings towards Fluttershy. She enjoyed their time together. It felt comfortable, fun, like being with a close and beloved friend. A close and beloved friend who she would pretend not to notice staring at her flank and quickly looking away. She certainly cared for Fluttershy. The adoration she saw in those big blue eyes stirred protective feelings in her heart, and she took joy in bringing a smile and blush to that face, but there was no passion. No sense of longing when they were apart. She didn't feel the same fire that she saw in Fluttershy's eyes.

As much as she liked Fluttershy, Twilight couldn't stand looking into those cyan eyes. They reminded her far too much of the sky and Rainbow Dash. Twilight had worried that Fluttershy was going to catch on soon, but a quick kiss would always close those eyes and leave her too in bliss to be suspicious. To Twilight however, they always tasted like ashes. Worst of all, she found kissing just plain boring. It seemed like a chore, a duty she was expected to carry out, and she was fairly certain that was a problem.

On the positive side, this had led to her becoming a fairly good kisser. With nothing else to occupy her mind with, Twilight had started experimenting with different techniques and observing the responses. Adding a little bite or thrust here and there and being rewarded with muffled squeaks. At least she could take pride in a job well done.

Tonight looked like it was going to be another pleasant evening. They were both going out to dinner at the Golden Hoof Cafe, a fairly new restaurant that the local reviews claimed had a celery and carrot soup that was simply amazing. Giving her mane a quick final brushing, Twilight turned to join Fluttershy at the door. Together they began their journey through the early evening streets of Ponyville toward their destination. Twilight was feeling quite relaxed, but that relaxation quickly fled as they rounded the last corner and spotted two familiar ponies approaching from the other direction. It seemed Applejack and Rainbow Dash had the same idea for their evening. It became clear that they had been spotted as Applejack called out to them while crossing the street.

"Well hey there you two! What brings you out around these parts this evening?"

"Oh, Twilight and I were just heading out to dinner. I hear this restaurant is just wonderful."

"Yeah, same here," Rainbow Dash replied. "Hey! We should totally get a table together. It'll be like a double date. I can't believe we haven't done one of those yet. It'll be so awesome!"

"It certainly sounds like fun, and I do s'pose it'll be a might easier to get a table for four than two tables for two given how crowded it's looking to be."

"That sounds like a great idea. What do you think Twilight?" Fluttershy looked toward her with bright eyes and a hopeful expression.

She was boxed into a corner. A part of her mind screamed that this wouldn't end well, that she needed to find some excuse to back out of this. Dating Flutterhsy was fine when they were alone, but she was still self-conscious in public, not to mention around Dash. The problem was, she was coming up completely blank for a reason to refuse. Even if she could think of a semi-plausible excuse, could she really bear to disappoint three of her friends, especially when one was her marefriend and another was the mare of her dreams? Feeling crushed beneath the social pressure, she quickly consented.

"Well I can't think of any reason why not. Sure."

Having come to an agreement, the party continued on toward the door to find a table. Despite the large crowds gathering at the restaurant, a private booth for four was found almost immediately. Twilight wasn't terribly surprised. Even without having saved Ponyville and all of Equestria on multiple occasions, such things tended to happen when you were the personal protege of Princess Celestia. In the past she had found it embarrassing, if useful. The others seemed to have mistaken it for simple good fortune as they found their way to their table for the evening.

After the first round of the best garlic bread she had ever had, Twilight's nerves were starting to relax. Maybe this evening wouldn't be so bad after all. Most of her negativity was probably just due to hunger. The evening proceeded pleasantly at first. They enjoyed good food while Applejack shared news about the farm and her extended family in Appleloosa. They all shared several good laughs at the tales from Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy's days at flight school. Aside from a fair bit of jealousy that Fluttershy had so much personal history with Dash, it was like any other enjoyable night out with three of her friends.

"So what have you been up to lately Twilight?" Rainbow Dash suddenly asked. Twilight stumbled a moment, surprised that the conversation had suddenly turned to her.

"What? M-Me? Oh, nothing much really. Just studying and such, nothing that interesting."

"Oh no, it's very interesting," Fluttershy cut in. "She's been experimenting with the natural resonant frequencies of various gems and crystal structures, and trying to focus and direct magical resonance waves over long distances. If it works, vibrations from one crystal could be picked up by another, allowing easy communication over long distances. At least that's how I think it's supposed to work. She's been letting me help in the lab and I've been learning a lot." The other ponies stopped and stared for a moment before Rainbow Dash finally spoke up.

"Wow. Looks like you're turning Fluttershy into an egghead too. We better watch out, or pretty soon we'll all be catching it like some kinda nerdy plague!" Dash broke into peals of laughter at her own joke.

"Settle down there Rainbow," chided Applejack. "Weren't your lab all secret and private and stuff sugarcube?"

"Yeah, I hope Spike isn't getting too jealous of your new assistant out to take his job." Rainbow Dash laughed gleefully.

Fluttershy blushed and fidgeted in embarrassment while Twilight tried to respond. "It's not really that big a deal," she replied. Head lowered a bit, she mumbled out "I-I mean...if you ever wanted to see my lab that would be fi-" It was clear that nopony could hear her inaudible mumbling as Rainbow Dash was now turning to Fluttershy.

"So have you been doing anything other than being Twilight's new lackey? Hopefully she hasn't been riding you too hard."

"Oh no, not at all. In fact, she's been a big help with all of my animals. She helped me organize all my supplies and optimize my feeding schedules. Her sedation and anesthetic spells have been so helpful with treating the injured animals, and she even goes with me to gather some rare ingredients from the forest so I won't be scared going alone."

"Well that sounds mighty sweet of ya Twi. Good to see you're getting on so well."

"Yeah. It's good to know Fluttershy is in the capable hooves of the world's third best marefriend."

"Third best?" Applejack raised an eyebrow in Dash's direction.

"Well obviously I'm number one, and you come in at a close second."

"Watch out you don't trip over your ego there RD."

"Bah, you know you love it. Besides, I said you were close. I just happen to be the better kisser."

"Really now? Well missy, that's starting to sound like a challenge."

"It just might be."

And just like that, a make out contest had erupted. Twilight stared at one of the suddenly fascinating garnishes on her plate while she ground a hoof into the floor. This part still hadn't gotten any easier. She quickly released the magical grip on her water glass before she accidentally shattered it. Preparing to grit her teeth through the rest of the evening if it continued on like this, Twilight stole a glance over to Fluttershy who was staring transfixed, face a beet red, with a hint of something in her eyes that almost looked like...excitement? As Fluttershy returned her gaze, that excitement seemed to morph into hunger.

Is she...? Oh no. No no no no no. Not here, not now!

There was a wet smacking sound as Rainbow Dash and AppleJack finally broke apart. "Your turn!"

Twilight barely had time to process what Dash had said before Fluttershy leaped forward and pressed their lips together. The startled unicorn's eyes darted around the room and locked onto the other two ponies staring at her with large smiles on their faces. She quickly closed her eyes and struggled not to pull away, forcing herself to push back. It felt as if she were tying to press her face into a hot stove. As much as she didn't want to see, she couldn't help herself. Setting her mouth on autopilot, Twilight cracked an eye open just enough to peek through her eyelashes and see that Dash was still staring directly at her.

NO! Don't look at me! Please! She means nothing I swear! It's you I want! It's always been you!

Her concentration was so shattered that she accidentally bit down hard on Fluttershy's lip, eliciting a gasp of excitement followed by a doubling of intensity. Now it was a full on assault of bitter tasting lips and tongue. Her stomach turned and panic gripped her mind as she heard Dash give a small cheer of encouragement.

GET OFF! GET OFF! GET OFF! GET OFF OF ME!

Just in time, Twilight aborted a spell she hadn't even realized she had been casting that would have knocked Fluttershy across the room with a wave of telekinetic force. Choking back a tear, she finished up to the light applause of the other couple.

"Excuse me, I really have to use the little fillies room." Twilight slid herself away from the table and walked quickly toward the bathroom, waiting until the door had shut firmly behind her before she let out a sob. She felt filthy, sullied, and she wished she had a toothbrush to wash the lingering foul taste out of her mouth. As the last minute replayed through her mind, she felt her stomach turn again and dashed into one of the stalls to be sick. After coming back out again, she was really starting to miss that toothbrush as she rinsed her mouth several times and splashed some water on her face.

She had been avoiding being with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy at the same time for just this reason, and it had been even worse than she had imagined. She stared at her disheveled image in the mirror, water slowly dripping down from her chin and the end of her bangs, the soft rhythm of the drops impacting the sink punctuating her heavy breathing, eyes watery and red from crying and from the acrid smell of her own sickness. She couldn't keep doing this.

GET OFF OF ME!

She had come so close to accidentally hurting Fluttershy back there. All because she thought she could fake her way through this relationship. Sure it was fine as long as Dash wasn't around, but that wasn't sustainable. There were sure to be more situations like tonight. There was no way she could avoid them all. What if next time she actually did hurt Fluttershy? No. She had to end this before things got anymore out of hoof. Not tonight of course, she didn't want Fluttershy to think it was because she had done something wrong on their date this evening, and suspicions would be raised if they broke up the same night their friends had seen them so "happy together". Still, this was not something to procrastinate on. Swearing to herself that she would take care of it sometime within the next week, Twilight made herself presentable before rejoining her friends with the sincerest looking smile she could muster.

***

Twilight took a deep breath and exhaled slowly as she stared at the door in front of her. She wished she could be doing something a bit more relaxing instead. Like facing down a hydra. Tonight was the night she officially broke things off with Fluttershy. She had carefully planned the time and location to try and soften the impact as much as possible. Doing it in Fluttershy's house might offer the little extra security of familiar and comfortable surroundings. It would still probably be devastating, but at least she wouldn't face a long walk home to reach her bed.

Fluttershy didn't know why she was coming over, Twilight had just told her that she needed to come by around 7:00pm and that there was something very important she needed to do. Angel wouldn't take too kindly to her plan. She might have to find a way to lock him in another room, or maybe knock him out with a sleeping spell. All the plans were set, now she just needed to knock on the door. A hydra would have been so much easier. Finally, after another deep breath, Twilight raised a hoof and knocked.

"Coming!" There was the sound of rapid hoofsteps followed by the door swinging open to reveal the beaming yellow face of her marefriend. "Hello Twilight. Please come in. I've got dinner all ready."

"Oh, you didn't have to do that. Really, I'm not even that hungry." Twilight's statement was immediately undercut by the audible rumbling of her treacherous stomach. With a sigh of resignation, she relented and followed Fluttershy into the kitchen.

Thanks for the food, now I'm dumping you. Classy.

Twilight sat down and did her best not to enjoy the wonderful meal Fluttershy had made. Unfortunately, it was delicious and it was evident that Fluttershy had poured her heart into making it. Twilight's stomach and taste buds lobbied to abort the break up plan entirely in favor of more home cooked meals, but there was a reason she didn't delegate thinking to her digestive organs. Glancing around the room, she noticed a distinct lack of a certain troublesome white rabbit.

"Say, Fluttershy? Where's Angel?"

"Oh, don't worry about him. I wanted us to have the house to ourselves for the night, so I asked Rarity to look after him for a while." Twilight didn't know why Flutterhsy wanted the house free tonight in particular, but she was thankful for the unexpected blessing. Both ponies were unaware that at that very moment, the first floor of Carousel Boutique was being reduced to a tattered war zone by Angel and Opalescence.

Their meal finished, silence settled between them. Twilight thought that Fluttershy looked unusually nervous, considering how comfortable they had grown around each other lately. Did she suspect? Had she picked up on some clue given unconsciously in the past few days? Figuring it would be better not to waste any more time, Twilight clenched all the muscles in her legs and spoke.

"So...as you know, I came here for something very important. There's something I need to tell you, something that has to happen."

"Yes, I know and I'm ready. If you would...um...join me upstairs in the bedroom?"

Twilight didn't have a problem with that. If her bed was the place Fluttershy felt most comfortable receiving bad news, then she would do all she could to accommodate her. As they walked up the stairs, Fluttershy seemed to be growing more nervous with each step. Strangely enough, her steps weren't filled with hesitation, so much as what looked almost like excitement. Confused, Twilight followed her up and into the bedroom where they both took a seat on the bed.

"So I-" Twilight tried to speak but stopped short when she noticed Fluttershy's face. She was blushing brighter than she ever had before. It was so bright that Twilight worried she might pass out. Her legs also seemed to be shaking slightly and her pulse was pounding so strong that Twilight could feel it through the bed.

"Fluttershy, are you alright?" Twilight asked, worried that she had taken ill and might collapse any second.

"Yes, I'm fine. More than fine really, I feel great." Fluttershy swallowed and closed her eyes, as if summoning all the courage and willpower she could muster, and fixed Twilight with a half-lidded gaze. "But I know I could feel so much better."

Twilight's mind was sent reeling. What was that supposed to mean? And why was Fluttershy squinting at her? It was at this moment that several environmental clues rose to her attention. They had been detected by her senses earlier, but only now were they finally making themselves known to her conscious perception.

She noticed a calendar on the wall with today's date circled. There was something about the date that had been nagging at her mind until she remembered that it had been exactly two months since her first date with Fluttershy. At the same time, her nose registered a sweet smell, and she glanced around to see a dozen scented candles lining the room. She also felt something lightly brushing against her rump and tail. A quick look down confirmed the source.

OH SWEET CELESTIA! THE BED IS COVERED IN ROSE PETALS!

All the pieces clicked together as Twilight realized exactly what Fluttershy thought was about to happen.

Oh Shit.

Now what was she supposed to do? Well, it wasn't as if delaying was an option anymore, unless she wanted to be a truly despicable pony. A tiny part of her mind tried to argue that a minor delay would leave Fluttershy in the most relaxed state possible to receive bad news. The rest of her mind branded that part defective and forbade it from participating in the discussion any further. The general plan hadn't changed, it was just going to be a whole lot more painful.

Twilight thought back to the night at the restaurant, recalled her own haggard image in the mirror. She remembered the tiny flame of anger and disgust that had flared in a moment of panic and almost caused her to hurt her close friend.

It's necessary. It's the right thing to do. If I don't do it, she'll just suffer more later. It's the best thing for both of us. She would need to hold onto that thought if she were to have any chance of making it through this.

"Fluttershy...we need to talk." Twilight tried to put as much firmness as she could into her voice.

"Actually, I think we've talked quite a bit already. They say actions speak louder than words anyway." Still wearing that sultry look, Fluttershy took a small step closer on the bed. Twilight could now just barely feel the warmth of breath on her coat. She had never imagined that Fluttershy could behave like this. She found it intriguing and, unfortunately for her focus, more than a little exciting. She could feel her resolve starting to shake.

The heady fragrance of the candles, their soft glow, the comfortable body heat radiating off the pony next to her, they all conspired to cloud her mind in a thick fog. Resisting was so much work, and she was feeling so lethargic. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be a little lazy for once. After all, Rainbow Dash could be pretty lazy sometimes, and she was still-......Dash......Dash! The thought dispelled the cloud hanging over her mind as if it were the kick of the blue weather pony herself. Shaking her head clear, Twilight fixed a serious look to her face.

"No. It's very important. I...can't be your marefriend anymore."

Twilight couldn't help but imagine the sound of screeching train brakes, as Fluttershy came to a stop, eyes open wide as she tried to process what her ears had just heard. Much like the proverbial train wreck, Twilight couldn't look away as she saw the world collapse piece by piece behind those eyes. She could see the carnage of hopes and dreams sitting in twisted and broken piles, smashed into fragments by those six simple words. Those eyes would become a staple of her nightmares for weeks.

"Wh-what?" The shock and confusion in Fluttershy's eyes made room for the desperate hope that she had somehow misheard. That soon they would be laughing over such a silly misunderstanding.

"I'm sorry..." Twilight said in what she hoped was a firm, but sympathetic tone.

"Why?!" The desperation and panic was beginning to seep into Fluttershy's voice. "If it was something I did I'm sorry! I'll do better, I promise! Just tell me what to do and I'll do it! Please!" Each word felt like a knife twisting into Twilight's heart.

"No! It wasn't anything you did or didn't do. You've been great, more than great, a wonderful marefriend, the best anypony could hope for. Anypony else would be lucky to have you. The problem is with me. I can't be what you need me to be."

"That's not true!" Fluttershy cried out. "You're fine the way you are! Perfect! Everything I want already!"

"Not quite. I can't love you the same way you love me. I care for you, I really do. I just...can't feel THAT way. Remember how I told you once there was some other pony I had feelings for? Those feelings never went away. I'm still thinking about them all the time and that's just not fair to you. You deserve better than that. I'm sorry, please don't blame yourself. It's my problem and there was never anything you could have possibly done to change it."

"But....I said I don't care if you don't like me as much as I like you. I don't mind! It's okay with me!"

"Really? Could you really be happy knowing that I could never return your feelings? Knowing that I wasn't attracted to you romantically? Doubting the sincerity of each kiss? Do you really think you would be happy like that?"

"Yes!" Despite Fluttershy's declaration, Twilight could see the uncertainty in her face as she mentally grappled with what she knew to be the truth. The logic of Twilight's words led to one simple conclusion, but one that couldn't be accepted, for to accept it would be to kill hope. "I....I don't know....I think so....maybe...."

"Well I know I won't be happy in that situation. I'd be miserable, and then I'd probably take it out on you and make you miserable too. I'm sorry."

"But...I...if we..."

"Fluttershy..." Twilight locked eyes with the frantic pegasus in front of her, and with as much solemn finality as possible, said "I'm sorry."

With those last words spoken, Twilight saw the dim light in Fluttershy's eyes go out. The thin candle of hope finally extinguished and replaced by a rising tide of salt water. It was the single worst thing that Twilight would ever see in her life. At least she had prepared for this part. She quickly moved forward to wrap her forelegs around Fluttershy, and direct her weeping head to the inside of her shoulder. Fluttershy put up no resistance and wasted no time in thoroughly soaking Twilight's coat. Twilight could hear a few words being squeezed out between choking sobs.

"Hate you.....I want to.....hate you so badly.......but I can't!" Twilight didn't say anything. There was nothing she could say that would help anymore. All she could do was sit there and try to be physically comforting. After ten minutes, the loud sobbing had died down to intermittent sniffs and whimpering.

"Are you going to leave now?"

"Only if you want me to. Should I?"

"No. Please, just stay with me a little bit longer?"

"I'll stay as long as you need."

Twilight didn't know how long she stayed there with Fluttershy's face buried in her chest, but when she finally noticed that Fluttershy had fallen asleep, the candles had all burnt low. Lowering her head, she touched her horn to the top of the sleeping pony's head and cast a spell to push her into a deep sleep and give her pleasant dreams for the rest of the night. A small parting gift for her friend and ex-marefriend.

After carefully tucking Fluttershy into bed, she quietly closed the door behind her and went downstairs. She cleared away the remains of their dinner and washed the dishes before turning out the lights and closing the front door behind her on the way out. It was done. Finally done. It was the right thing to do. But then, why did it feel so terribly wrong? Why did she feel like the worst villain in the history of Equestria?

As she turned back towards the library, a thought crossed her mind. That things were now finally back to 'normal'. She could go about her usual business of pining miserably in peace.

Alone.

Goody.

Author's Note

Kicking up the sad to 11. First of all, please don't murder me! You'll never get new chapters if I'm dead! I always intended the whole Fluttershy thing to be a brief diversion from the main plot, but in these two chapters I kept thinking "Just stop it right here and let them be happy you jerk!" But no, I have to get this thing back on the rails, which includes plenty of sweet sweet pony misery. Second, sorry for the delay. I know it's not as bad as the last one, but I really should have had this out a week ago. Complete inability to focus combined with constant refreshing of the BronyCon documentary kickstarter page. Next chapter will be out I have no idea when. I gotta catch up on all the fics I'm reading.

Chapter 9

Twilight was just on her way home from the stationery store, loaded down with a fresh supply of ink and scrolls, when she heard a familiar voice shouting from behind and above her.

“HEY TWILIGHT! WHAT DID YOU DO TO FLUTTERHY?!”

Twilight turned to see Rainbow Dash's face contorted with anger. She looked as if she was ready to fly over and punch Twilight's head off, and was only held back from doing so by the fact that her tail was caught firmly between Applejacks teeth while the farm pony's hooves dug into the solid ground.

Twilight sighed. Much as she hoped this wouldn't happen, it wasn't entirely unexpected. It had been three days since that night, and nopony had heard from Fluttershy since. It was only a matter of time before one of their other friends checked up on her, and Rainbow Dash was the most likely pony to do it. It was only natural that she would immediately set out to find the one who had hurt her childhood friend. From the look of things, Applejack had tagged along as well.

In an instant, Rainbow Dash had torn free from Applejack's grip and was charging straight at her with frightening speed. Without thinking, Twilight threw up a protective barrier which Rainbow Dash slammed into head first, causing her to ricochet back into the air. Horrified that she had possibly just concussed the mare of her dreams, she immediately dropped the barrier.

"DASH! Are you oka-OOF!" Apparently unfazed by the impact, Dash had instantly righted herself in midair and dove back towards her target, crashing hooves first into Twilight's chest and knocking the wind out of her.

Twilight found herself on her back with Dash standing over her. Strong, athletic forelegs stood on her chest and kept her pinned to the ground. As much as Twilight had dreamed of being in this particular position, she was finding the current context less than desirable. Unable to get any oxygen back in her lungs and afraid of what Dash might do next, Twilight let out a burst of adrenaline fueled magic that knocked the enraged pegasus away and pinned her against the wall of a nearby building. Dash remained pinned upright against the wall by her wings, kicking and snorting furiously while Twilight stood there gasping and trying to catch her breath so she could speak.

"THAT'S ENOUGH! STOP IT, BOTH OF YOU!" Applejack suddenly jumped between them. Placing a hoof on Dash's chest, she waved to Twilight who took the hint and released her magical hold, redirecting the rest of her concentration to sucking in mouthfuls of air. "RAINBOW DASH! Calm down right now!"

Dash just growled in response. "No way! You saw how Fluttershy was!"

"Yes. I did see. And if you had been paying any attention, you would have noticed that you running out the door looking for blood was the last thing she wanted!" Rainbow Dash growled out something incoherent in response. "Look, I know you're just trying to be a good and loyal friend to Fluttershy, but isn't Twilight our friend too?"

Dash stopped squirming and stared straight into Applejack's eyes. "...Yes," she grudgingly admitted.

"In all the time we've known her, have you ever seen her do anything that would indicate she has a single malicious bone in her body?"

Dash's eyes softened a little, but she maintained an irritated edge to her voice. "...No."

"Do you think she would ever intentionally try to hurt Fluttershy?"

Dash dropped the rest of her aggression and let out a sigh of resignation. "No. Of course not. She's a good friend."

"Then maybe, instead of fighting in the middle of the street like a couple of wild animals, we should try talking like civilized ponies. Listen to her side of the story? You know, like a good friend would?" Dash nodded in response and Applejack removed her hoof. Together they walked over to Twilight, who had finally recovered.

"Sorry about that sugarcube. We were just over at Fluttershy's and she was looking mighty down." An orange hind leg reached out and kicked Rainbow Dash in the side.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry." With the anger ebbing away, the realization that she had just attacked one of her best friends seemed to sink in and she hung her head in shame. "We just wanna know what happened."

"Well...we kinda broke up three days ago," Twilight said as she rubbed her forelegs together uncomfortably.

"We'd gathered that much Twi," Applejack replied with a flat look, "we were hoping you could shed some light as to why."

"Yeah! What's the deal? You two were great together, and then all of a sudden Fluttershy's crying her eyes out and won't leave her house!"

Twilight wondered how she was going to get out of this one. "Well...what did Fluttershy say?"

"She wouldn't tell us anything!" Dash exclaimed with great irritation. "We asked her what happened, but she just acted like it was some big secret. Said it was between you two, and that she wouldn't talk about it without your permission. "

"She was mighty tight lipped alright. Even given the state she was in, she wouldn't budge an inch."

Twilight was touched. She had never actually sworn Fluttershy to secrecy over the matter (in retrospect, she probably should have). Still, Fluttershy had taken it upon herself to keep it a secret. Even after Twilight had crushed her heart, she still cared enough to keep the truth of that night bottled up inside. A mixture of guilt and thankfulness flowed through Twilight as she tried to think of a way out. A lie wasn't going to work, and there was no way she could tell the truth.

"I...can't tell you."

"OH COME ON! What do you mean you can't tell us? Did you guys have some kind of big fight or something?"

"No, we didn't have a fight. It was nothing anypony did. We ended things on good terms and we'll hopefully stay good friends after this. And I mean exactly what I said. I can't tell you the reason why."

"But WHY?! What's with all the secrecy?!" Dash's temper was beginning to flare again.

"Because it's PERSONAL and PRIVATE, and apparently Fluttershy agrees." Twilight noticed that she was starting to raise her voice as she reacted defensively to Dash's aggressive questioning. She wanted to shout that it was none of Dash's business and didn't concern her in the least, but that would be a laughable lie. She forced some calm back into her voice. "Look, I know it's upsetting, but you're going to have to believe me when I say it was important. I had to break things off then or it would have gotten much worse and we both would have been miserable."

"ARRGGH! Why can't somepony just tell me what's going on here?"

"Now listen RD. If Twilight and Fluttershy don't wanna tell us, then that's their right. If Twi says it was a good reason, we're just gonna have to believe her. Besides, I don't think Twilight is the kinda pony that goes around breaking hearts for kicks."

Twiight's face twisted with disgust and shock at the thought. "Of course not! It was the hardest thing I ever had to do!"

"Fine, whatever, don't tell me," Rainbow Dash grumbled in defeat.

"Well then, now that we're all agreed," Applejack turned to point a hoof at Rainbow Dash. "You should get back to Fluttershy's house. You scared her half to death when you tore outta that place. She's probably all kinds of worried that you're still out here seeking bloody vengeance in her name. You get back there and tell her you didn't and won't beat Twilight to a pulp, and start providing some comfort. I'll be along shortly." With a few last grumbles, Rainbow Dash took flight and sped off into the distance.

Now that they were alone, Applejack turned back around to face Twilight. Gone was the chastising look she had just been using, replaced by a more serious expression. "So Twi...." Applejack's face gave a slight flicker of discomfort, "this secret of yours...I'm guessing it might involve Dash?"

Twilight's blood ran cold.

She knows! Fry her right now and dump the body in Everfree! With any luck the timber wolves will take care of it!

Twilight quickly got a hold of herself. She was glad that she had turned around to pick up the contents of her saddlebag that Dash had dislodged. At least now Applejack couldn't see the twitch of panic that momentarily crossed her face before she regained control. She hoped that the clenching of all her muscles hadn't been as visible as it had felt. Continuing to organize the inside of her bag, she replied as casually as she could, hoping she might be able to bluff her way out.

"Well, since it is supposed to be secret, I can't really confirm or deny anything, otherwise somepony could just keep guessing and gaining clues until it wasn't a secret anymore. I'd just have to give this response whether they were right or wrong. Still, I am curious as to what would lead you to such an...interesting conclusion."

"I ain't blind Twi. I can tell when one pony has got eyes for another, especially when that other pony is Dash. I've been there myself, and I can spot the signs. Small changes in the way they walk, the way they speak, and the way their eyes always seem to settle on and track one pony in the room."

Twilight wanted to shut Applejack up. Wanted to do something to silence the wave of words that continued to pour out in that insufferably stupid accent and cut through all her defenses, needling her with their truth. She thought about using magic to swell Applejack's tongue until it couldn't fit in her mouth anymore. How dare she lecture her about Dash! How dare she have the audacity to be so right! Instead, she spoke in a calm but fascinated voice.

"Oh? And you think I have displayed some of these signs?"

"I'm...almost certain. It's not exactly out in the open, but I'm pretty sure they're there."

"Well I'm not quite sure how to feel about being watched with such scrutiny. Being the object of such attention. Flattered I guess? Either way, I'm sure it required an impressive amount of attentiveness to your surroundings, especially when one would think your attention would be so focused somewhere, or on somepony, else." Twilight couldn't help a little bit of ice creeping into her voice.

"And exactly what is that supposed to mean?"

Twilight finished poking around in her saddlebag and turned around with a friendly smile on her face. "Hmm? Oh nothing, nothing at all. Just thinking out loud. It would be silly to take it as some ridiculous implication that anypony had wandering eyes." Applejack gave a brief snort. "Regardless, if you've seen what you think you've seen, then I can understand how you might come to your particular conclusion. As I mentioned before, I'm afraid I can't really confirm or deny it either way. I really should be going now, but I will say this. You shouldn't worry. Even if you were correct, it's quite clear that Dash has chosen you and is happy with that choice. At least it looks that way. As flattering as it would be to consider me in any way a threat to that, it wouldn't be very realistic."

Somehow she had managed to keep that smile on her face, as if she were lecturing about an interesting point of Equestrian history. As she turned around and summoned the magic for her teleportation, her face now out of sight, she let her smile drop.

"Besides, nothing spoils a relationship like jealousy. I hear it's such an unattractive trait in a marefriend." Then Twilight was gone.

***

If Applejack still suspected her secret, which was very likely, she had the discretion not to mention it again. They acted as if that little conversation had never happened.

It was a week until Fluttershy left her cottage for anything other than to feed her animals. A little over two more before they stopped avoiding each other and their friends had stopped walking on eggshells around the both of them. It wasn't long until they were interacting with each other at Pinkie's parties, and their friendship was quickly building itself back to where it was before. Soon, the only reminder that anything had happened was how large and empty her lab occasionally felt.

As spring came to a close and summer approached, Twilight Sparkle fell back into a familiar routine. Study, hang out with friends, write friendship reports, sulk. It was far from happiness, but at least it was a less acute misery. Being on the losing end of a love triange was bad enough without the constant murky ethics of her own actions nagging at her conscience. At least now she could wallow in self-pity without feeling like as much of a monstrous hypocrite.

So this is my life now I guess.

As weeks went by, Twilight fell more and more into resignation. She still wished she could be with Dash, but she knew it was nothing more than a ludicrous fantasy. Nothing would ever come of it. She had accepted that now. Perhaps that was why her mind was currently having trouble processing the words she was hearing.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes from up on her napping cloud as she repeated herself. "I said Applejack and I broke up." Twilight hadn't been expecting anything in particular when she had asked Dash what was new, but she certainly hadn't expected this.

"What? When did this happen?"

"Day before yesterday," Rainbow Dash said, trying only slightly too hard to appear cool and disinterested.

"Why?"

As much as her fantasies had depended on this as a necessity, the thought of them actually breaking up had just been too implausible to consider. Was this just another of their small competitions turned fight that had escalated? Those had always been short and ended in heartfelt makeups and make outs. Had her own break up with Fluttershy and small talk with Applejack sown the seeds of discontent? That seemed highly unlikely.

Dash gave a small sigh. "Look, sometimes these things just...don't work out okay. You think you've found somepony who's right for you, everypony says you're perfect for each other and you agree, and it turns out...they're just not. It just...wasn't meant to be I guess." Only a highly attentive pony would have been able to notice the beginning of a tear forming in the corner of Dash's eye before she rolled over on her cloud.

Twilight was conflicted. On one hoof, she felt like shouting with joy. She certainly hadn't expected to wake up this morning and have life go her way for once. She had thought she had given up hope, finally resigned herself to reality, but a small ember had remained locked away in her heart, and it was quickly flaring back to full strength. She felt justified in holding on all this time. All those voices she had imagined in her head that had called her foalish and idiotic for clinging to such delusion, well who was the idiot now? She had showed them. She had held onto love, and now her perseverance would pay off. At the same time, she did feel bad for Rainbow Dash.

"Wow...that kinda sucks."

"Yeah, yeah it does."

"Do you...want to talk about it at all?"

"Not really."

"Okay then. I guess I'll let you be. If you need anything, just let me know and I'll be happy to help."

Twilight turned and walked away. She would make a move in time, but not yet. It would be oh so easy to act now, to try and take advantage of Dash on the rebound. It would probably work too, but she had far too much respect for Dash to try something like that. If this was going to happen, she didn't want it spoiled by underhanded tricks. Besides, there was a good chance she might blow it if she acted too quickly. Dash might catch on to what she was doing and be mad, or maybe it would work for a week or two until she recovered, and then Dash would look over her actions and think less of her. No, Twilight would be supportive, but she would also keep at a safe distance. That would start with respecting Dash's requests to be alone whenever she asked for it.

Four weeks. I'll give it four weeks. That should be enough time to recover, plus a little buffer. I've waited this long, I can wait a little longer.

In the meantime, she would incinerate anypony who so much as made eyes at Dash. There were surely other ponies who weren't quite as scrupulous as herself, and she certainly wasn't going to hold the door open for any of them to swoop in under her nose.

***

Twilight couldn't contain her nervous energy this evening. All of her long held plans would finally be coming to fruition. For weeks she had acted as a friendly ear and pillar of support for Rainbow Dash, while keeping a strict eye on herself. Dash liked to put up a tough front, but Twilight could tell that she was hurting far more than she let on. On the rare occasions that Dash let her defenses down, Twilight restrained herself to a reassuring hoof on a shoulder. She knew that if she went for a full embrace, she might not be able to break it off without lingering a little too long. She also encouraged Dash to spend time with the rest of their friends as well. She didn't want anypony to be able to say that she had unfairly monopolized Dash's attention when she was vulnerable. Now all of that self-denial was going to pay off. Earlier that day, she had finally made her move.

Twilight noted with amusement that it just so happened to be the one year anniversary of the day her life had taken such a drastic turn into chaos and misery. A year since her first plan to confess to Rainbow Dash with a flashy fireworks show had been aborted. She couldn't believe how foalish she had been to think that was a good idea in the first place.

If you think about it from the confessee's perspective, it's really a highly stressful situation. There's enough pressure without a giant spectacle and the other pony staring at them waiting for an answer.

Twilight had remembered desperately scrambling and wishing for more time while Fluttershy waited nervously. A letter was the obviously superior method. Not only was it considerate, allowing the recipient to read, think, and construct a response at their own pace, but it allowed her to take her time in the confession as well. Instead of trying to nervously choke out her feelings face to face, she could pick and choose her words just right, use her mastery of the written language to accurately describe exactly how she felt. That was exactly what Twilight had done.

She had spent two hours that morning trying to take all the thoughts that had swum in her head all year, and put them perfectly on paper. How her dreams had come to constantly feature one particular pegasus, the pain she had been hiding at seeing Dash and Applejack together, the real reason she had broken up with Fluttershy. Twilight poured her heart onto the pages, wanting to confess everything. Then there were the poetry filled sections that attempted to convey how she actually felt. They were beautiful works of art, filled with the most vivid and passionate imagery ever constructed by ponykind.

Looking over what she had just written, Twilight wondered if maybe it was a little too much too fast. While she wanted to communicate that her feelings were serious, the last thing she wanted was to scare Dash off with such intensity out of the blue. She set to work butchering her beloved creation. Maybe she didn't need the five extra pages of similes. She would find a way to fit it into one, maybe two pages. The language might be a bit too grandiose in some places. She should probably change the parts that required familiarity with the works of several philosophers. After several edits, Twilight was satisfied that her letter was an accurate enough statement of her feelings, while not being too intimidating. She had opted to keep a few of the more passionate and poetic bits in, but managed to work them in so the letter had a steadily growing intensity from start to finish.

Proud of her creation, Twilight steeled herself for the most difficult part. Delivery. She knew that Rainbow Dash would be out on weather duty. A thunderstorm was needed this evening to replenish nitrogen levels in the soil. Dash wouldn't be back until the middle of the afternoon. Still, she found herself hesitating as she stood outside of the empty cloud house, sealed envelope floating in front of her.

There was no going back after this. Dash would know of her secret and Twilight would finally have an answer. For better or worse, she could never return to the security of the indeterminate limbo she inhabited now. With a grunt of determination, Twilight lifted the letter to the cloud door and pushed it through the mail slot. It was done. All she had to do now was wait for the response and enter the new chapter of her life.

And waiting was exactly what she had been doing for hours. She knew it was silly, there was no guarantee that she would even get a response the same day. If Dash sent a reply in the mail, it might take a day or two to be delivered. Then again, she might come flying through the door any second. Regardless, Twilight couldn't summon the focus for any task other than pacing around the library. At least she wouldn't be bothering Spike. He had been called away to Canterlot on business, and would be gone for the next few days. Something about the princesses needing him to facilitate rapid communication for some trade dispute.

Twilight was once again daydreaming about where she should take Dash for their first date, when her thoughts were interrupted by a sharp knock on the door. In a purple blur of motion, she ran to the door and flung it open. Sitting there on her doorstep was a single envelope with her initials on it. She could just detect the wonderful scent of the pony she loved lingering in the air from her recent presence. It seemed Dash had responded with a letter of her own, personally delivered that night. Was that good? Bad?

Mind racing with hope and fear, Twilight carried the letter with her into the kitchen. There, she poured herself some of the tea she had made a little earlier in a vain attempt to settle her nerves. She tried to take a deep breath, realizing that her breathing had become rapid and shallow. Her muscles twitched with energy as she slowly tore open the top of the envelope, the sound of tearing paper making her heart beat faster. Finally, she took out the letter and began to read.

Dear Twilight:

I've never been the best with words or writing, especially about feelings and stuff, but I think you definitely deserve the effort. I got your letter earlier today. I wasn't sure what to feel about it for a while. Flattered I guess? It's not everyday you learn you've caught the eye of such an amazing pony and made such an impact on them. You're one of the best friends I've ever had, and one of the greatest ponies I've ever had the privilege to know. Unfortunately, I just don't feel the same for you romantically. I'm sorry. The spark just isn't there. I'm sure it would be great if it was, but it isn't. If we could pick who we loved, things would be so much simpler. I would be hard pressed to find a better choice than you. I wish there was something I could say or do to make it better, but there isn't, so I'll just say I'm sorry. I know it probably doesn't help much, but it's true. I still cherish you as a friend, and hope we can continue being friends long into the future. Hopefully we'll both find somepony who we love and who loves us in return.

Twilight sat a few seconds in stunned silence. Her eyes scanned over the page several times, hoping she had missed some crucial bit that would change the entire meaning. Something that would change it to "I love you too Twilight". No matter how much she reread the letter, the result was always the same.

When sound returned to the library, it was with a deafening shattering noise. As much as it resembled her breaking heart, it had actually come from the tea cup she had thrown against the wall in a sudden fit of rage. The sound was joined by a cacophony of others, as Twilight turned and kicked over the kitchen table, sending its contents spilling across the room.

WHY?!

The single thought burned in her mind like fire. Dash wouldn't even give her a chance.

It's not fair! It's not fair! There was nopony else in the way this time! It should have been perfect! Why can't we just be together?!

Of course, she had been given an answer right in the letter. A part of Twilight recognized that it was a perfectly valid reason. If the feelings just weren't there, there was no use in trying to force it. As much as she needed a focus for her anger, she couldn't find cause to make it stick to Dash. Part of her even admired the construction of the letter. It had been gentle and sympathetic, while remaining firm and clear, leaving no room for further doubt on the subject. Really, it was the ideal way to deliver such bad news. Still, it didn't make her feel any better.

Twilight knocked over a bookcase, thrashing about in directionless rage. The problem with not believing in fate or any external deities that controlled her destiny, was that she had nothing to blame for the cruelties of the universe. She had no choice but to eventually turn her bitter accusations against herself. Was there something she had done wrong? Something else she could have done. Should she have tried to move in earlier? Maybe it would have made no difference at all, maybe it would have been worse. Or maybe she had thrown away her only chance for some sudden sense of "integrity". Well she had kept her integrity intact, and a fat lot of good it was to her now. A small part of her tried to argue that it probably wouldn't have worked anyway, or that if it had, Dash would only stay with her out of a feeling of obligation and guilt. Unfortunately, even that looked preferable at the moment.

Twilight needed air. She also needed to get outside before she destroyed the entire library. Most of all, she needed to run. Flinging open the door with her magic, Twilight ran as fast and as hard as she could. She ran through the empty streets with a mad desperation, as if she could escape from reality and all of her problems if only she could keep running fast enough.

Thunder crashed and lightning split the sky. Rain poured down from the sky in fat droplets that broke against her face as she charged through them, masking the tears that streamed down her face. Twilight knew that it wasn't a good idea to go running about in a thunderstorm, but she didn't care at the moment. She kept running, now thoroughly soaked, until the path ended at one of the many sheer cliffs on the outskirts of town. Twilight collapsed in an exhausted heap and peered over the edge. Far below her was the ponyville dam, the waters of the river now swelled and raging with the heavy downpour.

What am I supposed to do now? Is this just how it is going to be forever? Will it ever get any better?

Twilight stared into the raging rapids below her, transfixed by the swirling eddies. They were beginning to look so welcoming. They called out to her with a simple solution, an alternative to a lifetime of repeated misery. True, drowning was supposed to be particularly messy and unpleasant, but the multitude of large rocks at the bottom of the long drop offered a solution to that problem as well. Twilight pulled herself out of the mud and stood thoughtfully on the edge of the cliff.

Of course the idea was stupid and filled with numerous flaws. First there was the untold devastation that would be wreaked upon her friends and family. Without even the decency to leave a note behind, what straws would they grasp at for an explanation of why? Would they blame themselves for not seeing signs that weren't there?

Second, even without a note, Dash would put the pieces together. She'd probably be emotionally scarred for life and destroy herself with guilt. The last thing Twilight wanted was to hurt Dash in such a way. And yet, as horrible as that thought was, it still wasn't the strongest reason why she hesitated.

The truth was, as long as the next day brought with it a chance to see Rainbow Dash's face, Twilight wanted to live through it. Dash had still wanted to be her friend. Even if all her dreams of Dash loving her had been shattered, she was still horribly addicted to her company. It was a weak reason to live, but it was there and she was powerless to change it. Even with the immense pain it would surely bring, Twilight couldn't turn away from the possibility to see and talk with Dash at least one more time. As long as at least one more opportunity existed, she would continue to delay taking that final step forward indefinitely.

Twilight turned and slowly made her way back to the library. She didn't bother to raise a shield against the rain, letting it drip from the front of her bangs instead and run down her sides into the the cold mud that had stuck to her belly. When she finally got home, she ignored the mess she had made. There would be time to clean it up later. She walked up the stairs and started to draw herself a very hot bath.

Author's Note

And there's another chapter done. I know you're probably getting sick of the sad roller coaster. Well next chapter should bring us into what I am tentatively calling act 3. A bit of a gear shift with some more action to go along with all the brooding. That dark tag is finally going to get some use too. Been waiting to get into this part. Now please go wild with your speculation.

Chapter 11

The small purple filly watched in awe as Cadence cast her spell. The bickering couple across the street stopped their argument and started smiling dreamily into each other's eyes. Cadence, the worlds greatest foal sitter, turned and smiled down at Twilight, who was clapping her front hooves together in applause.

"Wow! You're amazing Cadence! How do you do that?"

The pink alicorn giggled lightly. "It's my special talent. I'm the only one in the world who can do it." She gave a small wink.

"So does that mean you can make any two ponies fall in love whenever you want?"

Cadence gave a light shake of her head. "No silly filly, nopony can do that. Love happens on its own, I just bring out what is already inside."

Twilight gave a small nod as she trotted alongside her favorite foal sitter, but curiosity picked at the back of her mind. Why should it be impossible? If 'love' was a physiological state, shouldn't recreating that state be the same thing as 'creating love'. Twilight wasn't sure, but she thought it should be theoretically possible. She hadn't read anything about magic yet that would indicate it couldn't be done.

Twilight looked up at Cadence in admiration. She had always felt the need to impress her and show off how much progress she had made in her studies. If she could recreate Cadence's own spell, that would certainly be impressive.

Over the next several days, Twilight watched carefully whenever Cadence would cast her spell. She would try to make out as much as she could about how the strings of magic wove together and interacted. When she got to her room, she would take out a quill and parchment and write down everything she could remember.

Everypony knew that Twilight was talented, a prodigy even, but nopony suspected just how brilliant she could be when she put her mind to a task. Even though her studies of magic were still in their early stages, she did her best to reverse engineer the underlying spell composition. Pieces slowly came together. Where gaps remained, she filled them in with guess work and improvisation. She found small places to make adjustments and improvements to adapt to her other modifications. She practiced her experimental spell on the bugs in her terrarium, and the occasional squirrel or bird that would pass by her window.

She soon realized that Cadence had been wrong. Twilight had figured out how to simulate love out of nothing. She grinned to herself when she realized she had not just recreated a unique spell, but actually improved upon it! That wasn't the only modification either. One part in particular had been giving her trouble. She found she could induce the desired state in a subject, but had trouble directing the affection toward a desired target. She finally had the brilliant idea to change the spell to a sustained enchantment on the target itself, that would then affect the observing subject. The target didn't even have to be a living creature, it could be an inanimate object!

Twilight realized that her modifications had made it a completely unique spell of her own. Bouncing around her room with joy at her success, she couldn't wait to show it off to Cadence.

The next day, Twilight waited eagerly on the street corner for Cadence to arrive. She sprouted a grin when she finally spotted her approaching.

"Okay Twilight, I'm here. What is this special surprise you wanted to show me?"

The young filly bounced with excitement. "I figured out how to recreate your spell! I even made some improvements. Watch! Watch!" Twilight quickly scanned the busy street and saw two ponies about to cross paths. Perfect. As she cast her spell, a small stream of hearts floated from her horn and into both ponies.

"Twilight? What are you-uggh." Cadence's concentration was broken as she looked at the enchantment and felt unfamiliar magic touch her mind. She quickly pushed it out and blocked it, an easy task for an alicorn like herself, but it had still been unexpected and disorienting. As she shook her head clear, she was aware that Twilight was talking excitedly.

"See! See! Isn't it great! Isn't it great! I'm just like you now!"

Twilight looked up and was confused to see that Cadence's face had started to turn pale, a look of horror stuck on it. Twilight followed her gaze back to the pair of enchanted ponies and realized that she had overlooked a significant problem in her testing regimen.

Since her goal was to create affection between two ponies, all of her experimental trials had only involved two subjects (or sometimes one subject and an inanimate object). In this respect she had been successful, perhaps too successful. The two ponies were clutching at each other with a look of mad desperation in their eyes. What she had really screwed up, was the fact that she hadn't tested the effect on multiple observers. Instead of only affecting the first pony to look, the enchantment persisted and spread its effect to all observers except the caster. Ponies who had turned to look at the commotion the original two had caused soon found themselves charging to join in, creating a bigger scene that was rapidly snowballing out of control.

Cadence pulled herself out of her stupor and quickly cast a mass dispel centered on the cluster of ponies. Grabbing Twilight in her hooves, she spread her wings and flew them both out of sight before any of the dazed and confused ponies could notice them. Setting down in a nearby alleyway, she turned to the surprised filly.

"TWILIGHT!" The little lavender filly jumped. She had never heard Cadence shout before. "Where did you learn to do that?!" At first Twilight thought she was angry, but soon noticed that her eyes were also filled with fear. She had never seen Cadence afraid of anything either, and didn't know which was more upsetting to see.

"I-I just made it up myself! I started with trying to reproduce your spell and then I just made some changes to it!" Her eyes started to water. Had she done something wrong? Cadence was starting to scare her.

Fear and anger changed to a brief flicker of surprise and confusion. "Just made it up? But that's...nevermind! Listen! Never cast that spell again, okay? NEVER! Don't tell anypony about it. Just forget about it!"

"Alright alright! I'm sorry! I won't cast it again! I promise!"

Cadence exhaled slowly and relaxed. "Okay. Let's go home."

As far as Twilight could tell, Cadence hadn't told her parents, so she wasn't in trouble. The whole issue was swept from her mind when she received her invitation to the entrance exams for Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns two days later. It was particularly strange and exciting as the invitations were not usually sent out until two months later.

***

Twilight thought back on the promise she had made. She had already broken it once during the smartypants incident. Sure she hadn't quite been herself at the time, had been under a lot of stress, had panicked and picked the first spell she could think of. They were still just excuses. She should have known better. She did know better, and she had been disgusted with herself after it was all over.

Celestia had been angry. A rare and terrifying sight. Twilight still remembered her heart leaping up into her throat when she saw the princess hovering in the sky, looking like a goddess about to smite her with righteous fury. She had very nearly wet herself when she heard Celestia call out her name in a booming voice that thundered across the sky. Fortunately, once they were back in the library, Celestia had noticed the state she was in and backed off a bit to calm her down first. Twilight's friends had interrupted before they could get into the princess' real concern. Wanting to keep it a private talk, she had wrapped up the rather trivial letter problem and left it at that for the night.

Celestia had returned the next day to speak with Twilight in private once she was back to normal. She had explained that mind altering magic was very VERY forbidden, and that the penalties were quite harsh. The only reason Twilight was getting off with a warning this time was a combination of the fact that Celestia knew her personally and knew she didn't have any ill intent, her friends had already been told that she wouldn't be punished, and nopony in town clearly remembered the details of what had happened. The part that had really stuck with Twilight however, had been the story of Celestia's initial reaction.

"Twilight, when I got the initial reports, do you know where I went first? To the gardens. When I heard that Ponyville was in chaos from a mob of mind controlled ponies, I thought that Discord had somehow broken free and was wreaking havoc on Equestria again."

That thought still sent chills down Twilight's spine. The thought that she could ever be anything like him. But it had been entirely true. If Discord had been around, he would have heartily approved. Probably would have cracked a joke about putting him out of a job.

No way! I'm nothing like him!

But she had been then. And here she was now, seriously considering breaking her promise again by messing with a pony's free will. It wouldn't be out of ignorance or a spontaneous act of desperation in an impaired state of mind. No, this would be carefully planned and premeditated. She would have no excuse this time if anypony found out.

She would just have to make sure nopony ever found out.

There was plenty of work to be done. There was no way she could use the current Want It Need It spell as it was. It would require some extensive modification. The most obvious problem was the unrestricted targeting. That would be easy enough to adjust. She had been a small filly when she last worked on it, and she had learned quite a bit more since then. But that wasn't the only thing that needed to be changed. She hadn't exactly known anything about what love was supposed to feel like when she had crafted the spell, and had cobbled together a crude caricature of obsession and desire. It was a decent enough first pass, but it needed refinement. Keep that core of passion and desire, but weave in some of the more subtle aspects. It would be the difference between picking a lock and swinging a sledgehammer. Speaking of subtlety, it needed a slow build up. Heads would be turned if Dash just jumped her after one glance. It wouldn't take long for somepony to put two and two together.

Twilight began writing down preliminary design notes with frantic speed. The more gradual and natural the development, the better. Not only would it make her actions less noticeable, it would reduce strain and possible resistance in Dash. It wouldn't be mind control, not really. Twilight didn't want a mindless toy, she wanted Dash just as she was, body and mind intact. It would just be a little push in the right direction. Just a small thought planted in the back of her mind. A small fixation. Dash would find her thoughts drawn toward Twilight more often, and with increasing intensity. Her brain would interpret it as growing affection and start to fill in the rest. By the end of it, Dash would come to her, and it would be her choice.

Not a real choice. Not a free choice. It's still manipulation. Coercion.

What choice is really free? Everypony is manipulated in some way. Blood sugar levels and sleep drastically affect judgement. Countless psychological studies have shown that the lighting and colors in a room have an impact on decision making. The right smells can trigger deep seated memories with significant emotional meaning. Nopony complains that makeup, perfume, and a nice dinner is unfair manipulation.

Wonderful rationlizations, but that's quite a bit different from implanting hypnotic suggestions via magic. You could get a pony to think whatever you want with enough sleep deprivation and conditioning, but that's hardly considered fair play.

Well it's a good thing we're not doing that then. That involves physical coercion and harm. Nopony is harmed with this. In fact, this should make Dash happier than ever. It'll make Dash feel the same way we do, except now it will be reciprocated. Honestly, it would be cruel to withhold such a gift. If you care for Dash's welfare, this is the best thing you can possibly do.

Twilight's concerns drifted away as she became more absorbed in her work. She could argue with herself later. If she couldn't actually pull it off, it would be a moot point anyway. The familiar comfort of a challenging project washed over her. All of these required changes were going to be difficult. The central core remained the same, but large sections had to be rewritten from scratch.

With this much revision, she wondered if there were any simpler alternatives. All she could think of was the Love Poison, and that had plenty of problems of its own. First of all, the setup would have to be a bit too contrived. She would need to have them both drink the potion at the same time. Then there were the less than desirable behavioral side effects. Finally, there was the fact that the effect would break if they broke eye contact for over an hour. That wasn't exactly a recipe for a stable relationship.

Twilight got back to work. Over the next several hours, a stack of empty inkwells piled up. Her garbage can would be overflowing with parchments full of rejected ideas, if she hadn't been careful to burn every single one. She wasn't about to just leave that kind of evidence sitting around.

Maybe if I nest this sub-spell inside this feedback loop...no, it would fail after the 5th call. Maybe if I add another sub-spell to take over those functions? No, that would take up way too much energy to be self-sustaining!

She had hit a block. She couldn't make a spell with that many intricate parts that would be able to maintain itself without collapsing. She could increase the power supply, but that risked damage to the subject, or at least possible detection that some foreign influence was present. Twilight massaged her temples. She must be overlooking some simple solution right in front of her face. All of these small threads to control and regulate. Together they would add up to the suitably complex emotional state she wanted, but they were impossible to manage individually. There had to be a more efficient form of abstraction to use. Something to hold together the concept as a whole. Something to fill Dash's heart with desire.

Desire...heart...THAT'S IT!

The flower known as Heart's Desire was able to interpret the complex wishes of others on a basic ontological level. If it could be worked in as a material component, it could be used to translate her intention to the rest of the spell's framework. Since it normally read from the part of the mind that held deep seated desire, it would also be perfect for guiding essential parts of the spell to write into that area. Twilight began scribbling with renewed energy. This would work! She would need a few other components to stabilize it, but it should actually work!

***

Twilight checked her saddlebags once again as she stood at the edge of the Everfree forest. She had finally finished her new spell design late last night and created a list of the special material components she would need. First was the Hearts Desire. This would be the central ingredient that would help translate desire from her mind to Dash's mind.

Next was a dragon scale. This spell would likely run pretty hot. The amount of magical discharge released as a side effect might be harmful when working with something as delicate as a mind. Dragons were naturally resistant to magic. She could use a scale as a kind of magical heat sink to moderate the process.

Finally, she needed some type of acidic venom to dissolve and mix the other ingredients. The dragon scale itself wouldn't physically dissolve, but most of its essence of magical resistance could be extracted and spread evenly throughout the solution.

She could come up with an excuse to get a scale from Spike later when he returned. That left obtaining the Heart's Desire as her first objective. She could borrow some from Zecora, but that might lead to questions as to what she needed it for. She could probably come up with any number of perfectly plausible reasons involving her studies, but paranoia had gripped her tightly ever since she had left the house. What if someone came inquiring after her? What if the princess really wanted to know how she was using it in her research? Borrowing that one ingredient might not be incriminating on its own, but Twilight didn't want a single possible lead pointing back to her, no matter how insignificant. The less ponies (or Zebras) saw her at all, the better.

Twilight knew it was paranoid, but considering what she was planning to do, paranoid was exactly what she needed to be. She would have to go and collect a sample herself. Fortunately, she had learned a great deal from her previous visits to Zecora's hut. She knew the type of places Heart's Desire would normally grow, and knew what to look for. She knew of at least one location that matched the description. The ruins of the ancient castle of the royal pony sisters.

Twilight hesitated as she prepared to enter the forest. The reality of what she was doing was starting to sink in. This wasn't just some idea on parchment anymore, this was action. She was actually following through on this.

The last time she had gone wandering off the trail in the Everfree alone, she had ended up turned to stone by a cockatrice. Not wanting to repeat that experience, she had taken care to fashion some reflective goggles. Completely reflective mirrors rested over her eyes. She was only able to see through the small periscope setup that led to two tiny openings that sat above where her eyes would normally be. She could navigate well enough once she got used to her vision being higher above the ground than normal. Hopefully, any cockatrice she encountered would reflexively try to catch her eyes in their normal location, and be caught by its own reflection. A weasel would be nice, but she wasn't about to go ask Fluttershy if she could borrow one.

After a triple check of her supplies, Twilight finally entered the forest. The sunlight quickly dimmed as she left the beaten path and pushed deeper and deeper into the wild overgrowth. She remained alert, eyes and ears peeled for any sign of danger. Her slightly distorted vision caused her to trip a few times over the occasional tree root, but she soon learned to readjust the length of her steps.

After twenty minutes of walking, her mind began to wander. She still had trouble believing she was actually doing this. It was crazy, but at the same time, refreshing. For two years she had done nothing but sit passively on the sidelines, accepting the hand fate had dealt her. Had done nothing but wish and dream and cry to herself about how unfair it all was. Now she was finally taking concrete action. For the first time in a long while, she felt like she had some control over her destiny. It felt good.

Twilight stopped as she spotted a familiar flash of color in the corner of her vision. Could she really be that lucky? Turning to her right, she spotted a small clearing. A small patch of Heart's Desire was barely visible under the heavy growth of a thorny bush.

Excellent! Looks like I won't have to go all the way to the castle ruins after all.

Twilight cautiously approached the mass of thorns that always grew around the precious flowers. They were said to be razor sharp and coated in an oily film that caused stinging and irritation. She was more than willing to face any pain or discomfort in her quest to win Dash. Fortunately, that was entirely unnecessary as she had remembered the old botanist saying Zecora had shared with her. "Your heart's desire must be won through blood, sweat, and tears, unless you are wise enough to bring along shears". Twilight levitated her pruning shears out of her saddlebag and neatly clipped away the intimidating thorns. Plucking several flowers and stuffing them into one of her specimen jars, she tucked them neatly back into her bag and turned to leave.

A rustling noise from the edge of the clearing froze her in her tracks. Blood ran cold in her veins as she strained her ears and slowly swept her eyes over the area. She sniffed the air, but was unable to catch the scent of any predators. Nothing but the smell of fresh wood. She was just about to relax and brush it off as pine cone falling when she noticed a bush that seemed to be slowly expanding and contracting, almost as if it were breathing. Two red spots that looked like berries were now starting to look a lot more like eyes. Once she finally saw it, she immediately noticed the others, six of them in total, almost entirely surrounding her. A single thought filled her mind.

RUN!

Twilight bolted in the one direction that remained clear, and the timber wolves broke from their cover to pursue. Despite being nowhere near the most athletic of ponies, her frenzied galloping gave her a clear speed advantage over open terrain. If she could just make it to the edge of the forest, she would be safe.

Unfortunately, her choice of direction had been limited and she currently had no idea where she was running. The longer this went on, the more chances they would get to outflank her. As the terrain got rougher, every small obstacle sapped her speed and brought the snapping jaws of death a few feet closer. She needed to do something soon or they would catch her. She needed a plan.

Twilight fought to think through the thick haze of fear and panic, doing her best to shut out the sound of hungry growls and snapping jaws that were closing in behind her. An idea came to her. As soon as she passed that thicket up ahead and was briefly out of sight, she would teleport back two hundred yards behind them and reverse direction. With luck, she would lose them and double back to the clearing.

She was almost there, horn glowing in preparation, when something lashed out at her from the right. Twilight jumped away, barely dodging a giant scorpion stinger that buried itself in the ground in the exact spot she would have occupied. In the blink of an eye, the stinger receded and a large tan paw swiped at her. She jumped back, just enough to avoid being opened up by the large claws, but still catching a glancing blow from the back of the paw. As minor a blow as it was, there was still enough muscle behind it to send Twilight flying several feet through the air until she collided with a tree. Her head exploded with pain and her vision swam as she dizzily tried to pull herself up.

Her goggles and saddlebags had been knocked loose when she had been hit. As she waited for the world to stop spinning, she wondered why she hadn't yet been torn apart by teeth and claws. As the world came back into focus, she found her answer. She was at the bottom of a small slope, the large tree at her back cutting off any escape in that direction. She was boxed in by a large manticore on her left and the pack of timber wolves on her right. They appeared to be in a standoff, the wolves trying to decide if they had a sufficient numerical advantage to take on a manticore, and the manticore trying to determine if his new lunch was worth this much of a fight. Her saddlebags were on the ground straight ahead, on the other side of both groups. A small bit of blood trickled down in front of her right eye. She could feel more on the back of her head, starting to mat her mane.

This was it. She was going to die here. A messy and violent death. It wouldn't be long until the standoff was resolved and the victor ate her for lunch. It had been stupid to come out here all alone. At first it had seemed like an adventure, a noble and daring quest for love. But this wasn't some feel good adventure story with fake danger, where she would escape unharmed just by virtue of being the hero. In reality, the forest was dangerous for a reason, and ponies who went wandering off alone tended not to come back.

She hadn't told anypony where she was going. Nopony knew where she was. It would look like she just disappeared one day without a trace. How long would her friends and family search for her? How long until they finally gave up looking? Twilight cast a last glance at her saddlebags. She had come out here in the hope that it would finally lead to happiness with Dash. Now she wasn't ever going to see Dash again.

NO.

The pain in her head faded as fear began to change into anger, which soon became a small flame of rage, burning hot in the center of her brain. The creatures before her wanted to kill her, to keep her apart from Dash. She had already suffered through too much to let that happen. Her horn started to glow.

I will be with Dash!

The white hot flame of rage blazed brighter and spread as two years worth of undirected aggression bubbled to the surface.

If you stand in my way, you will be swept aside!

The timber wolves and manticore had taken notice of her small light show, and turned their collective gaze her direction.

I will tear the world apart piece by piece if that is what it takes!

Twilight's eyes glowed a bright solid white. Bright violet magic swirled around the tip of her horn, while her mane whipped about wildly in the magical wind. She looked at the creatures before her and saw only obstacles. Obstacles placed in her path by a world that relished in her suffering. A world that refused to let her find happiness. A world that insisted on keeping her and Dash apart. She was sick of it.

This world can BURN!

A bright jet of flames burst forth from her horn, enveloping a nearby wolf with a yelp of pain and surprise. She did the same to another, and ripped a third to pieces until it was nothing but a pile of twigs and branches. The manticore attempted to strike her with its tail. She quickly caught it in her magic and snapped the stinger off, resulting in a roar of pain. Continuing to spew fire from her horn, she shattered the two blazing wolves and added their remains to that of the third, bludgeoning the manticore with the flaming brands and striking at the remaining wolves with the burning remains of their comrades. A purple glow surrounded the tree behind her as it was ripped from the ground, splintered into large pieces, then thrown forward into the the whirling vortex of flame, branches, and death. The creatures scattered and ran in fear.

Twilight stood there amongst the wreckage, breathing heavily. As the adrenaline and rage slowly faded, she looked around. A large amount of the surrounding brush was now on fire and the blaze was spreading rapidly. She had to get out of here. Not only was it a bad idea to sit in the middle of a forest fire, somepony on the weather team was bound to notice the smoke. When that happened, an emergency team would be sent out immediately with some storm clouds to get it under control. She needed to be long gone when that happened.

Spotting her saddlebags nearby, she quickly put them back on and checked to see that the contents remained undamaged. The Heart's Desire was still safe in the unbroken specimen jar. She used some quick first aid magic to close up her wounds and stop the bleeding. It would do for now, but she would have to give it some closer cosmetic attention later and find a stream to cleanup before she went back into town. All this blood and all these scrapes and bruises would be hard to explain.

Pulling herself back up the slope and walking down the path a ways, she spotted a nearby cave. That would be the perfect place to tend to her injuries, rest, and lay low for a bit until the situation with the forest fire blew over. It was upwind, so she didn't have to worry about the fire coming her direction. She stepped inside, put down her bag, and leaned against the wall to catch her breath. It had certainly been an interesting day so far. She noted that it seemed unusually warm and dry, considering that most caves in the forest were normally supposed to be cool and a little bit damp. A deep rumbling growl from behind her cut short her idle wonderings. Slowly turning around, she came face to face with a very large, and very angry looking green dragon.

Oh come on!

Author's Note

Now that my friends, is a cliffhanger. OP Twilight is best Twilight. Somebody make me some art of Twilight raining down fiery death. By the way, if anybody is confused, weasels are immune to cockatrice stares and are their natural predators. Look it up. Next time, Twilight kicks the shit out of a dragon.

Chapter 12

Dragon. Big, angry looking dragon. So this is apparently happening now. Wonderful. Fan-bucking-tastic! Because I was just thinking about how boring my day had been, and how much it would be improved by the addition of several tons of irritable, fire breathing reptile!

Twilight stared up at the green dragon that was slowly pulling itself up from a sleeping position to look at the intruder who had so rudely interrupted its nap. Something about the dragon looked oddly familiar.

Wait a second...Is that?...oh crap, it is the same dragon!

Twilight remembered the time that Spike had run away. He had inadvertently wandered into this cave and helped himself to the hoard of gems. She and Owlowiscious had come to his rescue, and the three of them had narrowly escaped. She doubted things would go well if this dragon recognized her.

Maybe he won't recognize me. Maybe we can talk this out.

It was a reasonable possibility. After all, dragons were at least capable of conversation. It was at least worth a shot. Twilight cautiously backed up into the center of the cave, before swallowing audibly.

Or maybe he's hungry after waking up.

"So sorry about barging in like this. I didn't know this cave was occupied. Funny story about that actually, you see I-"

As the dragon's eyes focused on the small unicorn in front of him, they suddenly widened in what Twilight assumed to be surprise, then quickly narrowed in anger. The dragon's large head pulled back, and there was a loud rush of air, its gigantic chest expanding as it inhaled in preparation. Twilight barely had time to react before a wave of fire raced towards her. Directing her magic to the stone floor of the cave, a large slab of rock, several feet thick, quickly shot up from the ground in front of her, shielding her at the last second from being burned to ashes.

Okay, so he did recognize me, and apparently wild dragons hold grudges.

The dragon, seeing that his flames had not hit their target, started to shift to the left in an attempt to burn her from the side. Twilight quickly extended her stone barrier until she was in the center of a tight semicircle, her back to the cave wall. The dragon continued to spray wave after wave of fire at her, undeterred. Though the walls of rock kept the flames at bay, she still felt the hairs of her coat and mane starting to curl from the heat. It may have been holding up for now, but dragon fire burned much hotter than any ordinary flame. Even now, it was only a secondary shield spell and some redirection of air currents that kept convection from roasting her. Given how much fire the dragon could let loose before pausing for another breath, it was only a matter of time before even something as insulated as several feet of solid rock became hot enough to bake her in a little crescent shaped oven. She needed to think of something fast.

Chancing a quick glance above her barricade while the dragon paused for another breath, she spotted the hoard in the back of the cave. It was a mountain of shining metals and glittering gems. Rubies, emeralds, sapphires, and of course...diamonds. An idea began to form in her mind. Using the gem finding spell she had learned from Rarity, Twilight focused on tagging as many diamonds as she could before pulling them towards herself. The stream of fire intensified as the dragon became enraged at the apparent theft of his jewels.

With the use of a temporary transmutation spell, she changed the diamond into graphite. It was a spell she had developed with Rarity to help with her dress designing. Jewels, especially diamonds, were difficult to shape and manipulate. By temporarily changing the allotropic structure, thin, intricate designs could be inlaid before they returned to their crystalline state. Taking advantage of this much more malleable form, Twilight laced thick veins of graphite throughout her stone barrier, Building fanned ridges along the strips that protruded out into the air. Connected to these strips, she drew long branching lines that spread across the ground and cavern walls, including one that trailed back to the pile of treasure. Her shaping complete, she let the transmutation expire. Overlapping sheets fused together into a large spider web of thermally conductive diamond that safely transmitted the heat away from her shield, using everything it touched as a giant heat sink.

The dragon continued to blast away at her wall, unaware of what she had done. Though she was no longer in immediate danger of being cooked, she was still far from safe as long as she stayed here. Eventually, even the diamond would start combusting at these temperatures, and no matter how stupid that dragon might be, any minute it could decide to switch tactics and just walk over and crush her. Manticores and timber wolves were one thing, but single hoofedly fighting an adult dragon was crazy, even without considering that their magical resistance would essentially render most direct attacks useless. Sure she could still levitate Spike around with only a modest amount of extra effort, but he was just a baby. A fully grown dragon was something else entirely. She needed to get out of here.

Unfortunately, she was currently pinned against a wall. Reaching the exit would require breaking from her cover and running about thirty meters past a very angry dragon. Despite the distance, this normally wouldn't be a problem. She could easily teleport herself directly outside, then sneak away before the dragon even knew she was gone. Something kept her here however. Her saddlebags sat directly across the cave, right where the dragon was standing. It even looked as if one of the straps was pinned underneath one of his front claws.

Really?! You're gonna die for that? Leave it. You can get more Heart's Desire later.

I definitely do not want to come back into this forest for a second trip. I'm also not leaving that bag behind. It's got my cutie mark on it. What if somepony finds it and learns I was here?

Who is going to go poke around in a dragon's den?!

I don't know. I didn't realize there was a dragon here. There's still a chance somepony could see it. I'm not leaving without that bag.

Well have fun with your gruesome death.

Twilight wracked her brain for a solution, but came up empty. She wouldn't even be in here if she hadn't started that forest fire. If she had managed a little restraint during her little rampage. Restraint....that was it! It was a bold and somewhat crazy plan, but it was all she had at the moment. It would involve some complicated multi-casting, so she needed to focus.

First, she would turn once again to the giant treasure hoard. Generating as strong a magnetic field as she could manage, Twilight pulled together as much steel as she could find. Ornate helmets and armor, cutlery, girders, and other bits of metal came together in a giant ball. Next, she levitated the mass of steel directly into the path of the dragon's breath and held it there until it started to melt. Soon she had a floating sphere of densely packed, molten metal.

Now came the difficult part. Twilight split the large sphere into five smaller spheres of equal size, holding each suspended in a bubble of magic. She then cast a spell to temporarily make the ground on the dragon's side of the cave nearly frictionless. Finally, she telekinetically grabbed at one of the dragon's claws and pulled sideways as hard as she could. The claws were slightly less resistant to magic than the scales that covered the rest of a dragon's body, but her efforts still barely resulted in more than a slight irritation. Fortunately, that was all she needed.

Though unable to physically move the dragon's foot herself, her action caused the towering beast to shift his own weight slightly in response. On the now nearly frictionless surface, this was enough to provoke a cascade of slipping and mad scrabbling as the dragon attempted to find his balance again. Twilight slid her bag away from the flailing dragon to keep it from being stepped on. The flailing soon ended as the dragon fell flat on his back. Twilight lashed out and knocked down a nearby stalactite, dropping it on his head, and leaving the beast temporarily stunned.

Now for the most difficult part of her plan. Using the narrow window provided, Twilight sent a ball of molten steel to the wrist and ankle of each limb, and one to the neck. The balls curved themselves over each spot, forming thick manacles at each point, and sending down deep spikes on each side that met underground. She quickly got to work, cooling the metal as fast as she could. She forced air currents over it, helped somewhat by the occasional flap of the dazed dragon's wings. She threw minor frost spells at all five locations, anything she could possibly think of to rapidly cool and harden the metal. As the dragon recovered from being stunned, the glow faded from the newly tempered steel restraints that bound him to the ground. He thrashed wildly, but with his limbs and neck immobilized, he had difficulty getting any leverage or turning his head to attempt to melt his bindings away.

Twilight quickly darted out from her fortification and ran over to her saddlebags. She had done it! She had incapacitated a dragon! She guessed that he would eventually break free. Probably manage to rip the stone behind him out of the ground after several hours, but by then she would be long gone. Turning to leave, she paused a second as a wild idea struck her. Maybe this little detour didn't have to be fruitless after all. Still high on her unexpected victory, Twilight galloped straight toward the prone dragon, jumped up onto his stomach, and tore off a scale with her teeth. The dragon gave a roar of minor pain and much greater offense as Twilight tucked the large scale into her bag. Hopping down, she gave the dragon a casual parting kick in the side with a back leg before trotting out of the cave.

Her heart continued to thunder loudly in her chest as she left. She didn't have time to stand around and relish her victory. The forest was still on fire, and she needed to leave the area before anypony arrived. Fortunately, now that she knew this cave was the one she had been to before, she knew roughly where she was in the forest, and the quickest direction out. Sticking underneath thick tree cover to avoid possible detection from the air, Twilight slowly made her way toward the edge of the forest. She kept eyes, ears, and nose attentive to her surroundings, in case the murderous forest wanted to try again for a third time.

At least her brushes with death had awarded her a valuable trophy. A scale from a fully grown dragon would be much more powerful, and much more effective than using one from Spike. She might have needed to use more than one scale from her assistant to get the full effect, and would have had to come up with some excuse for it. This new scale would comfort her paranoia, and give her much more leeway in tinkering with the power input of her spell.

She also wouldn't have to wait another week until Spike got back from his trip to Canterlot. He had been asked to appear at the academy to help with a series of lectures one of the faculty was giving on the physiology and behavior of dragons. Twilight had been surprised to find that very little had actually been written about the subject. It was difficult to get close enough to observe, much less interview a dragon in the wild, making Spike an invaluable aide to research. She had been surprised to find that her time with Spike, along with the few encounters she had had with her friends, had made her one of the few leading authorities on the subject, which had resulted in the request for notes by the unicorn professor. Twilight chuckled to herself at the amusing thought. I guess I have even more experience now. He had been ecstatic when she wrote back that Spike would be happy to visit and answer all his questions in person.

Twilight paused as she reached the edge of the forest. It was getting close to noon. Ponies would be out and about town, and she still looked a mess. She could see teams of pegasi in the distance pushing storm clouds towards the forest, responding to the smoke that had finally been noticed. She couldn't just walk out of the forest, covered in blood and dirt, and stroll through town. Glancing around at the landscape, Twilight made a note of local landmarks and began to construct a map of Ponyville in her head. Narrowing in on her location, she focused on the distance and direction to the library and teleported herself to her doorstep. Stepping quickly inside, she dropped her bags and collapsed onto the couch. She was exhausted. The loud rumbling of her stomach filled the room. Exhausted and starving.

Pulling herself to the kitchen, she made herself some lunch. Her stomach placated, she went upstairs to the bathroom to try and get herself cleaned up. After cleaning the sweat and dirt out of her coat, and washing the dried blood out of her mane, she made a more thorough inspection of her injuries. Nothing serious, just some scattered scrapes and bruises. The blow to the head had bled quite a bit, but she had managed to close it without any problem and it would be fine. She made a more detailed pass with healing magic, and covered up what was left with the little cosmetic magic she knew. At least her purple coat made fading the bruises slightly easier. With the newly acquired dragon scale putting her far ahead of schedule, she settled down for a well deserved nap.

***

Late afternoon had just become early evening when Twilight awoke from her nap feeling refreshed. After a quick meal, she glanced back to where she had left her bags by the door. Since it was summer, there were still a couple of hours of daylight left. She was feeling much better now. Maybe she could finish off the day by working on the last ingredient. Ponies would be heading inside for dinner soon, so she could move about unseen with relative ease. She would normally wait until nightfall, but this task would require her to see what she was doing. With a nod of determination, she grabbed her saddlebags and set out the door once again, taking the scenic route around town, and making her way to Froggy Bottom Bog.

She needed acidic venom to reduce the dragon scale to its essence. The safest method she could think of for obtaining it involved catching a certain species of toad that lived in the bog, and extracting the venom they excreted from their skin. It wasn't very concentrated, so she would need to catch a good number of them. The new dragon scale she had acquired was more potent, but also more resistant to break down, meaning she would have to catch a lot of toads. Unless she was lucky, she would probably have to come back again tomorrow to catch more. As she reached her destination, she pulled out her net and waded into the slimy muck.

A few hours later, and Twilight was beginning to become frustrated. She hadn't been able to catch a single one of these blasted toads! It was simply impossible to see anything in this disgusting, muddy slime. The few times when she thought she saw some kind of dark, shadowy shape moving under the water, her net had turned up nothing but twigs and aquatic plant life that she then had to disentangle.

The foul stink of the place was doing nothing to improve her mood. The sun was starting to go down, and she would soon be flailing around in the dark. She was just about to give up and go home for the day when she heard the loud sucking noise of something pushing its way up through the mud. A small wave of displaced water rushed past her legs, and a large shadow passed over the area as something blocked out the sun.

So help me Celestia, that had better not be what I think it is.

Twilight turned around to see a gigantic four headed hydra staring at her, all four heads licking their lips.

OH COME ON!

One of the heads lurched out to snap at her. Unable to move at any speed through the thick muck that gripped at her legs, Twilight teleported a few feet to the side, leaving the head with a mouth full of mud.

DAMMIT!

A second head struck at her and she teleported again.

WHY DOES EVERYTHING WANT TO KILL ME TODAY?!

She used a small barrier to deflect one striking head into the path of another, interrupting the latter's strike as well, before teleporting several meters back. She was stuck doing short range, line of sight jumps, as she didn't have the time to focus on mapping out a proper long range teleportation to safety. In all this mud, she didn't stand a chance of outrunning the monster. She needed to buy herself a few seconds to think. Lashing out at the surface with her telekinesis, she sent a spray of muddy water up into the eyes of all four heads at once, then teleported herself directly underneath the hydra's stomach. She remained hidden from view as the heads shook the mud out of their eyes and searched around to see where their target had gone.

Okay. Hydra. Multiple heads, each capable of individual thought and action. Loss of heads results in rapid regeneration and multiplication. One set of shared internal organs, so damage to the heart or lungs would be effective. Thick and durable hide makes that difficult though. Direct confrontation not advised. Flee.

If she could remain undetected for just a little while longer, she could get her bearings and teleport herself out of here. Twilight began to focus, trying to figure out which direction she was facing in relation to Ponyville. Her horn had just begun to glow when the hydra shifted its weight, bumping its stomach against her horn. A head leaned down to look, and there was brief pause and uncomfortable silence as she stared back into the upside down eyes for a few moments. The head let loose a loud roar, and Twilight discharged her built up magic in a bright flash of sparks, blinding it as she jumped away again.

Well that's off the table now she thought as she continued to frantically dodge attacks. Time for a plan B. Her inventory consisted of a pencil, some specimen jars, a small scraping tool, and a net designed for catching small frogs. The surrounding environment didn't offer much in the way of additional resources. The choking swamp gas that seemed to follow the hydra wherever it went was making it hard to think clearly as well. She wondered how the hydra could stand to breathe through it all the time. Suddenly she had an idea. A creature with that many active brains must need a lot of oxygen. If she could somehow disrupt that oxygen supply, it should quickly pass out. Of course, that would be much easier said than done. She would have to handle all four heads at once. With a shared set of lungs, one head that remained breathing could supply oxygen for the others.

Twilight teleported herself directly onto the hydra's back. She carefully provoked specific heads into striking, harrassing them with sparks, before jumping to a new location. She distracted the others with flashes of light and telekinetic prods. After some controlled maneuvering, she finally had all four heads in a tangled knot. Casting a large bubble shield around the cluster of heads, she used a simple spell she had used many times before in her laboratory. A basic pump spell pulled the oxygen out of the contained area while pumping in the noxious gas to take its place. The heads attempted to thrash about, but with their limited range of motion, she was easily able to keep the shield intact and centered on them. Her theory about the increased oxygen demand of multiple heads was proved correct, as it only took about ten seconds for the hydra to lose consciousness and fall over on its side. Twilight dispelled the shield and released her own breath that she had been holding.

"What next?!" She shouted into the empty air. "Windigos?! An ursa?! Maybe the whole changeling swarm wants another shot at me?! Why not just swing open the gates of Tartarus and form a nice orderly line of horrific monsters that want a piece of me!"

Her throat sore from shouting at nothing, she kicked a hoof into the muddy water. She would have to find a new place to search. This area wasn't safe as long as this hydra still hunted here. Maybe she could finish it off, but then what was she going to do with a giant hydra carcass? Even if she managed to chop it up into little pieces somehow, there would be hydra blood all over the place. There was no way she was going near that stuff. It was one of the most toxic venomous substances known, and could eat through flesh in a matter of seconds.

Twilight facehoofed as she realized the obvious solution. Approaching the unconscious hydra, she levitated a jar and a pencil out of her bag. Using her transmutation spell for the second time that day, she turned the pencil into a diamond edged cutting tool and made a small cut across the monster's side. Moving her jar into place, she carefully collected the trickle of blood and screwed the lid on tight. This was far better than catching a hundred toads. Before, she would have had to soak the dragon scale in venom for days, maybe even a week or more for full effect. Hydra blood was one of the few things that could completely eat through dragon scales in under a minute, and would fully dissolve it like tissue paper.

Tucking away her prize, Twilight headed home as the sun finished dipping below the horizon. Now that she had all three ingredients, her timetable had moved up significantly. With waiting for Spike and the long process of soaking the scales, she hadn't expected to be ready to go for at least three or four weeks. Now, with her new and unexpected acquisition of superior ingredients, she could move forward as early as tomorrow night. Dash would actually be hers. She gave a small shudder of excitement. It was seeming a lot less like some harebrained scheme, and a lot more like reality. Twilight continued home, eagerly anticipating another bath and the warm comfort of her bed.

Author's Note

So plenty of action this chapter. You have no idea how hard it was not to have her shout "I'm Twilight Sparkle Bitch!" after one of those fights. Story's coming up on the end soon. I may be reading back through the earlier chapters and making small technical edits. Basic grammar, punctuation, a few choice word replacements, etc. You've all swelled my head enough to make me consider submitting this story to EQD. Want to make sure it's freshly polished. It'll be fun reading my early chapters and seeing how much my writing has improved since then. I know some people thought the first chapter needed to be expanded upon a bit as it seemed a bit rushed with exposition, that it needed a bit more buildup before the reveal. The main story was always supposed to be after that reveal, but now that it's been mostly written, let me know if you think the first chapter should be rewritten/expanded.

Chapter 13

Twilight Sparkle stared at the wooden door in front of her. She had been staring at it for a good five minutes now, the image burning itself into the back of her retinas so she could still see the grain pattern when she closed her eyes. Her saddlebags hung gently against her sides, the right bag storing the sealed flask that contained her special solution. It had been a trivial task to prepare and mix the ingredients earlier that day. Handling straight hydra venom was always a bit dangerous, but she had more than enough chemistry equipment in her lab, and plenty of experience with the proper safety protocols. Soon her solution was finished, her equipment cleaned and sterilized, and all she had to do was wait for nightfall.

Night had fallen, but now this door presented a new obstacle. It wasn't a very imposing obstacle physically speaking. It wasn't made of steel or concrete, just simple wood. It wasn't enchanted with powerful arcane spells. It wasn't even locked. Opening it was as simple as reaching out with hoof or magic and giving a small push. Still, it was what she knew waited for her on the other side that made it such an imposing task. Up until now, she had treated her little love spell project as just that, a project. Despite her excitement, she had been thinking of it as an experiment, an academic challenge of her own abilities, albeit one that had nearly resulted in her death far more often than she cared for. As her objective became less hypothetical, and closer and closer to a reality, her growing excitement had been mirrored by a growing nervousness. Now, when everything was almost hers, she was hesitating.

This is stupid. Just open the door and go!

Twilight slowly raised a hoof, paused, and lowered it again. She sighed irritably at herself. It didn't make sense. The hard part was over. She had worked out all the bugs in the spell design, collected and prepared the necessary ingredients, now all she had to do was go to Dash's house and cast the spell, but she couldn't seem to leave her own house! All of her greatest wishes were about to come true, so why was she so afraid?

Afraid. Twilight hadn't realized it before, but she was afraid. If she went through with what she was planning, her life would be drastically changed forever. That was the idea of course, she was miserable now and was doing this to change things for the better. But she had been miserable for so long that she had started to accept the pain as a constant part of her life, and a key part of herself. It was far from comforting, but she found almost a perverse sense of security in its familiarity. Now she had a real chance to tear that pain away for good, a chance to be happy.

Twilight tried to remember what true happiness felt like. She couldn't remember, it seemed like an eternity since she had last felt it. She tried with all her might to visualize what life with Dash would be like. She couldn't. True, she had dozens of dreams and fantasies, but the realistic image of day to day life in a relationship with Dash eluded her. She had gotten so used to the idea being nothing more than an impossible fantasy, that she had trouble accepting it as a soon to be reality. And there, Twilight found the source of her fears. She was in love with the idea of Rainbow Dash. Two years of wild fantasies had built a pedestal so high that she feared Dash would never be able to live up to it. Heretical as the thought might be, Dash might not turn out to be the shining paragon of perfection that lived in Twilight's mind. If she did nothing, she could keep that image intact and untarnished forever.

NO! That's ridiculous! I love Rainbow Dash. The real Rainbow Dash. I've known her for years and I fell in love with her the way she was. Who cares if tiny details don't match perfectly to some phantasm. I'll take the real thing any day! I'm not going to lock myself away in the darkness because the shadows cast on the wall have smoother edges than what I might find in the light! With that, Twilight Sparkle kicked open the front door and stepped out into the warm summer night.

She was grateful for the thick clouds that obscured the full moon. She doubted there was any truth to the rumors that Princess Luna could see through it like a giant watchful eye in the night, but it helped to calm her nerves nonetheless. The burst of confidence and determination had got her out the door and most of the way down the street, but had quickly given way to familiar paranoia. Twilight cautiously crept through the shadows, even though it was highly unlikely that anypony else would be out at this hour. Her pitch black catsuit clung tightly to her body, further hiding her from any theoretical observers. It had sat in her closet for years after Rarity had patched up all the small tears and holes. Now she finally had an occasion to use it again. Not only did it help her blend into the shadows, it also prevented her from leaving any stray lavender hairs around Dash's house. To this end, she had also tied back her mane.

With most of the natural light from the moon and stars obscured, Twilight navigated her route by a combination of memory and the stray beams of light that reached her from the firefly street lamps. After a matter of minutes, which seemed more like hours, she finally reached her destination and stared up at the cloud house above her. After a quick application of the cloud walking spell, there was a brief flash of light in the darkness as Twilight teleported up to the front door. Twilight found herself hesitating again as she looked at the puffy door in front of her.

This was it. She was here at Dash's house, about to follow through with her plan of breaking in in the middle of the night and enchanting her while she slept. She cringed at the thought. She had never so much as littered before. Her muscles tensed as fear and anxiety crept up her spine and twisted her guts. There was still time to back out before she crossed that line. She could turn around, go home, and.....and what? What would she do then? Just try and continue on like this little quest of hers had never happened? Get out her spade, go around to the back of the library, and dump her solution over the soggy and tattered remains of her previous plan? Even if she did, how long would that last? How long until she was pushed past her breaking point and tried again? The knowledge of what to do was already in her mind. It would only be a matter of time until her resistance gave out and she made another attempt. Maybe she would follow through, maybe she would chicken out and turn back until she made a third or fourth attempt. It was an inevitability, all that differed was how much suffering she would inflict upon herself in the meantime. Better to get it over with now.

Another brief flash, and Twilight was on the other side of the door. She looked around at the surprisingly clean interior of the cloud house. She wasn't sure why she had expected to find a mess. It wasn't as if Dash owned very much clothing or other junk to leave scattered around. There was a small cluster of dirty dishes, but they remained confined to the sink. Twilight checked to make sure she wasn't leaving any hoof print on the floor. Fortunately, the reinforced cloud floor remained firm, and didn't deform under her weight. Gathering her courage, she slowly walked forward in search of Dash's bedroom.

Well I'm now officially guilty of breaking and entering. Well, entering I guess. I didn't really break or force my way through anything to get in. Is there any distinction for use of teleportation? I doubt it. 'Twilight Sparkle. You are hereby found guilty of entering.' That just sounds stupid. Wait. Trespass. Yes. That's what it's called.

Twilight's idle thoughts evaporated as she heard the sound of slow, heavy breathing. Carefully peeking around a corner, she saw a door sitting slightly ajar. The noises were coming from the room beyond it. Dash's bedroom. Holding her breath, she very slowly pushed the door open a bit further, grateful that hinges made of clouds were incapable of squeaking. As soon as she had a clear shot, she hit Dash with the sedation spell that would keep her from waking up for several hours. The last thing she needed was for Dash to wake up and see her standing over her in her bedroom in the middle of the night.

Even though she knew Dash couldn't wake up, and nopony could see her through the cloud walls, Twilight's heart rate continued to accelerate with every step she took into the bedroom. She quickly retrieved the contents of her bags and began the setup. First she pulled out an ordinary looking bowl into which she carefully poured the mixture of dissolved ingredients. In the very center, she placed a short cylindrical tube with a single strand of her own mane running through the central axis. With a little bit of magical prodding, most of the mixture was pulled up through the tube and solidified into a candle around the makeshift wick. That was it. All she had to do now was light the candle, and she would be ready to begin.

Standing up for a quick stretch and a couple deep breaths before beginning, Twilight looked at the peacefully sleeping form of Rainbow Dash. The brazen pegasus, so full of energy and life, was now calm and still, unmoving except for the gentle rise and fall of her chest. The white cloud pillows were splashed with the chaotic colors of her wild rainbow mane. The curves of her beautiful, athletic body laid stretched out across the bed, soft but powerful wings splayed casually half open at her sides. Twilight's eyes finally settled on the beautiful lips that sat slightly open as breath passed between them. They seemed to be calling to her. Twilight thought back to all the nights on her couch after late night reading sessions. How she would stay up for hours, wishing she could shake off the restraint that kept her from reaching out and planting a kiss on those haunting lips. Dash wouldn't be waking up anytime soon, and as long as she was here.....it certainly wouldn't hurt if......

No! I can't! I won't! It's wrong to take advantage of her while she's sleeping.

Really? After what you came here to do, you're going to get hung up on this? This is where you draw the line in the sand? I think we're being a wee bit inconsistent here.

It's perfectly consistent. She can't consent to anything while asleep, therefore it would be wrong.

How is that at all consistent? I'm pretty sure brainwashing presents a slight problem to that consent issue.

It is NOT brainwashing! She will still be perfectly capable of making choices for herself. I'm just adjusting the emotional parameters so she'll WANT to choose me. Right now, she doesn't have feelings for me so kissing her would be disrespecting her wishes. After, she will have feelings for me, and it will be fine.

Perfect. Except for the fact that she doesn't get any choice in the creation of those feelings.

NOPONY GETS TO CHOOSE THAT! I certainly didn't get a choice in the matter. Fluttershy didn't. Nopony gets to choose who they fall for, or what foods they like, or any of the other parameters that influence us.

That's because up until now, they were impossible to change. Now a possibility for choice exists, but you're just not giving it to her.

What, ask her if she would like me to change her mind for her? Twilight wondered what response anypony would give to such a bizarre offer. Well she would probably say no. Then again, she would probably also say no if she already loved me and I offered to take it away. She'd prefer whatever state she's currently in.

Oh, so mucking about in her brain is totally fine because she'll want it later, but kissing her in her sleep just because she'll want it later is completely unacceptable. Have I got that right?

SHUT UP!

Twilight moved to light the candle, but found herself hesitating once again. She could still pack up her things and leave right now, but there really would be no going back after this point. She had been determined to see this through to the end, but the tiniest sliver of doubt still nagged at her. Her internal debate had raised a valid point, and she couldn't just ignore it. She knew Dash wouldn't want her to kiss her now, and doing so against her will would be wrong. How could she refrain from one course of action and not the other? What made her current plan permissible, other than she needed it to be?

There had to be something else. Some key distinction that would make it okay. Was it really going against Dash's wishes to make her feel love for somepony? Twilight thought back to the rejection letter that she kept locked away in a desk. Despite the pain its words had brought her, she had been unable to throw it away. Dash certainly hadn't expressed any kind of revulsion at the thought of being with her. To the contrary, the letter seemed almost regretful. The spark just isn't there. I'm sure it would be great if it was, but it isn't. Well, Twilight now had the ability to put the spark there. Surely if Dash had the choice to feel it, she would have taken it, right? If we could pick who we loved, things would be so much simpler. I would be hard pressed to find a better choice than you. Yes. That was what Dash had said.

Maybe they had just been kind words to spare her feelings, but Dash didn't seem the type to write something unless she meant it. Twilight focused on those four sentences, letting them run through her mind again and again, building her resolve with each repetition. Yes, Dash wouldn't mind. She might even approve. She had been single for the past year, surely she wished to love somepony who loved her back. They would be so happy together that it would be monstrous of Twilight not to go ahead with her spell.

A quick spark from her horn, and the candle was lit. Twilight quickly got to work, focusing on the construction of her spell. Small flashes of purple lightning arced from her horn to the candle in front of her. The flame turned pink and began to emit swirling, heart shaped clouds of rose colored smoke. With only minimal guidance, the smoke drifted over to the bed and into the nose of the sleeping pegasus.

Deep inside the recesses of Dash's brain, a tiny seed was planted. It wasn't an idea, or even a whole thought. Instead, the spell dove into the hippocampus and searched for one very specific cluster. The cluster that held the concept of Twilight Sparkle. Countless connections branched out, linking to all related concepts. Pony, purple, unicorn, magic, books, library, etc. From this central hub, new neural branches began to grow, stretching and reaching until they formed a direct link to the amygdala. Now any thoughts related to Twilight would also trigger a positive and deep seated emotional reaction. The long term effects of the spell mostly consisted of simply building and maintaining this bridge, occasionally activating it at random intervals to keep the connection strong and healthy. The rest of the brain would handle most of the heavy lifting. The left side of the brain would do its job, creating elaborate stories and justifications to explain the new feelings it would interpret as growing attraction and affection.

However, this wasn't all the spell did. Dash still needed one little push to get her started. Something to trigger the cascade of festering thoughts that would gnaw at the back of her mind the way they had at Twilight's. Continuing to focus her energy through the aromatic smoke, Twilight reached into Rainbow Dash's subconscious mind and began to fashion a dream. Nothing too formally structured or detailed, Dash's mind could fill in the gaps by itself, but supplying what fragments of images and feelings she could remember from her own dreams, replacing the bits of Rainbow Dash with alluring images of herself.

Rainbow Dash began to toss lightly, making incoherent mumbling noises in her sleep. Her magenta eyes began to dart rapidly back and forth underneath their lids as the dreams took hold. Her work done, Twilight blew out the candle and carefully packed up her things, carefully scanning the room to make sure she hadn't left a trace behind, or accidentally moved anything out of place. Carefully adjusting the bedroom door back to its original angle, Twilight thought she heard the gentle murmuring of her own name as she teleported straight down, reappearing less than an inch above the ground before she turned and headed home to wait.

***

Rainbow Dash awoke with a start, dazed and confused, and trying to figure out why her heart was pounding so fast. She knew she had been having some kind of dream. Multiple dreams? She wasn't sure. She knew that Twilight had somehow been involved, but everything else was a blurry mess. Whatever it was, it had dragged her all across the emotional spectrum. She felt like laughing, crying, and kicking something all at the same time. Somewhere in there she had been afraid of something. Something about Twilight leaving forever? She felt her blood run cold at the thought. She would hate to lose any of her friends, especially one as awesome as Twilight.

Whatever, it was just some stupid random dream. No point in dwelling on it. I've got stuff to do. Shaking her head to get her thoughts back in order, she headed to the bathroom for a quick shower.

She did have a lot to do that day. Her regular weather duties weren't much of a hassle, but being the head of the emergency response squad, she still had a mountain of boring paperwork to handle from that forest fire two days ago. Rainbow Dash grabbed another form and repeated herself for what felt like the twentieth time that day. After they had put the fire out, she had to oversee the subsequent investigation to determine the cause. She had spent the entire day yesterday supervising the effort.

Fluttershy had been brought in as a local ecological expert to examine what they had determined to be the fire's starting point. Traces of blood had been found near the remains of a torn up tree, but the fire had burned it far beyond the ability of any test to reveal what had left it. Fluttershy had said that there were definitely signs of a struggle between multiple creatures, but the damage wrought by the fire made it impossible to tell much more. One set of heavy tracks, combined with the mostly burned remains of a stinger, revealed that one of the creatures had been a manticore. Blossomforth and Thunderlane had come flying back in a hurry after being sent to poke around a nearby cave. They had reported flashes of light, and sounds of what seemed to be a very angry dragon thrashing about inside. That was a good enough explanation for Rainbow Dash.

She was mildly curious as to what could have gotten the dragon so worked up, but not enough to wander into its cave while it was rampaging. She doubted anypony else was dying to volunteer for that mission either. It didn't matter, the fire was a result of a small conflict between a dragon and several other Everfree creatures. If the Everfree Natural Society in Canterlot wanted more details on how the dragon's day had been going, they could kiss her prismatic plot and send somepony themselves.

Ha. Prismatic. She loved that word. Twilight had taught it to her. As much as she liked to tease her about being an egghead, she was always learning cool new things when they hung out together. She always had a great time. Even when Twilight got carried away with one of her long winded lectures, it was....cute? She hadn't thought of it that way before, but she guessed it was sorta cute. There was a bit of charm in that adorkable librarian thing Twilight had going on.

Whatever. I'm getting sidetracked here. Back to work.

Rainbow Dash continued through her stack of paperwork, but constantly found herself being distracted by idle thoughts that always led back to Twilight. The way she kept cool and effortlessly took charge in an emergency. Dash herself had always wanted to be a good leader to the rest of the pegasi on her weather team. Whenever she found herself doubting her own leadership skills, she would often imagine what Twilight would say in that situation.

Then there was the raw magical talent. She remembered how awesome Twilight had looked when she had taken care of that Ursa Minor. She didn't just rely on natural talent though, she had a passion for magic and worked at it constantly. Even if she was already the best, she constantly practiced and trained to make herself better. Dash could certainly relate to that. Then there was the fact that she was just plain fun to hang out with. Come to think of it, she hadn't hung out with Twilight for a while. She should see if she was free later that day.

Okay. I'll drop by and see if she's available later. In the meantime, I've got to get this finished before I can go anywhere.

Buckling down, Dash finally had all of the paperwork finished after an hour. After dropping the documents off in the mail, she quickly sped out the door to take care of her regular weather duties. She found herself moving through the tasks unusually fast, even for her normally speedy self.

After setting a new personal record, she was done with all her work for the day. Normally she would take this time to practice a few tricks, or find a nice cloud to settle down on for a nap. Instead, she made a direct line for the library, eagerly anticipating the fun times that were sure to be had. It was gonna be a great day. Just her and Twilight hanging out together. One of the smartest, funniest, prettiest ponies in Ponyville.

Wait what? Prettiest? Where did that come from? Well, I guess she's not exactly hard to look at. She's fairly well built all things considered. Still, what does that have to do with anything?

Pushing the errant thought away, Dash landed in front of the library door and knocked. The door quickly swung open to reveal a smiling purple face beaming back at her.

"Oh, hello Dash. What brings you here?" a sweet and melodious voice asked.

"Hi Twilight. I was just wondering if...if you..." Dash suddenly found herself stumbling over her words. Ever since the door had opened and she had seen Twilight, her heart rate had begun to speed up. Her body felt hot, and there was a growing feeling of tension and anxiety. She was starting to feel mildly claustrophobic, like she needed to spread her wings and fly away right now. She attempted to push on.

I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out. "I was just...I was hoping that...if you're not too busy, then maybe..." Damnit! This shouldn't be that hard! What's wrong with me?!

Twilight raised a quizzical eyebrow, leaning forward to stare into her face with a scrutinizing look. The sudden drop in distance between them caused Dash's heartbeat to soar even higher as she felt growing warmth spread across her face. "Dash? Are you feeling okay? Your pupils are dilated and your face is flushed. Are you coming down with something? If you want to step inside, I could run a few tests to see if-"

"No! No, I'm fine. Perfectly fine. I just...uh...wanted to borrow a book! Yeah, I was working on some tricks and wanted to borrow a book on flying and stuff."

"Well sure. I have a copy of practical aeronautics lying around, as well as-"

"Yes! That! I'll take that!"

Twilight levitated a book from a nearby shelf and held it in front of her. "Here you go then. Are you sure you don't want to step inside for a bit?"

"No! I gotta go. I'm very busy. Super busy today. Bye!" Snatching the book between her teeth, Rainbow Dash quickly turned and sprung up into the sky, leaving the library behind.

What the hay happened back there?! I just wanted to ask if we could hang out and I completely fell to pieces! It's not hard, I've done it plenty of times before. "Hey Twilight, do you wanna hang out?" Easy! Dash glanced down at the book between her teeth. Practical Aeronautics? I already own a copy of that! Twilight knows that too! Oh great. Now she probably thinks I'm crazy, or an idiot, or-ARRGH WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME TODAY! Maybe Twilight was right. Maybe she was coming down with something. She should probably head home and get some rest.

Unfortunately for Rainbow Dash, she couldn't get to sleep. She usually considered napping one of her many talents, but today she just had too much energy to settle down. After restlessly rolling about on her bed for a while, she finally got up and decided she needed to do something to burn off all this frustration. She spent the rest of the day flying and practicing her aerial stunts. She pushed herself harder and faster than she had in a long time. By the time she finally turned in for the night, she was exhausted. She flung herself down onto the bed and was asleep within seconds.

***

"WHOA!" Rainbow Dash bolted wide awake, heart pounding, and covered in a thin sheen of sweat. She had dreamed about Twilight again, though the fully flared wings at her side testified that it was a very, very different kind of dream. Immediately, she rushed toward the bathroom to start a cold shower. Though she could hardly remember anything about her first dream, this one was definitely memorable.

Bits of it replayed themselves inside her head as she stood under the water. Twilight giving her that smoldering look from behind a pair of librarian glasses that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. The light brushing of her outer feathers as Twilight had circled around her. The feeling of hot breath whispering into her ear.

You've been a very naughty filly Dashie. Looks like I'm going to have to give you some...remedial lessons.

No! None of that now! Dash shook her head violently under the frigid water and tried to will her wings to relax. It was just a dream, she was back in the waking world now. Twilight probably didn't even own a riding crop, and those socks...Rainbow Dash slammed a hoof down on the cold water lever.

After a long time, Rainbow Dash emerged, teeth chattering, to make herself some breakfast. She was feeling much better now. She didn't have any work scheduled for the next couple days, so she had the whole day in front of her. She was free to do anything she wanted. Flying out the door, she decided to just wander about until she got a better idea. Without realizing it she soon found herself stretched out on a cloud above the library.

Hmm...well I guess I could try to return that book, or would that be too awkward? Maybe I'll just stick it in through the return slot.

Her thoughts were cut short as she spotted Twilight leaving the library. Dash quickly pulled her head and limbs in to hide above the cloud. Why was she hiding? She peeked her face down through the cloud to catch a glimpse of Twilight trotting into town.

I wonder where she's going? Slowly, she began to follow, pushing the cloud along with her. What am I doing? Spying on my friends is so not cool.

Still, she continued to follow and watch as Twilight ran errands, picking up ink, stationery, and various groceries. She was certainly enjoying the view. She had never noticed before, but Twilight had really nice flanks, and they looked even better in motion.

No! Bad brain! Not cool! I don't think about Twilight that way. Well.....I guess apparently I do, but....

Dash knew that she shouldn't be thinking like that. That ship had sailed a long time ago. She was just a little mixed up from that crazy dream, that was all. And that was all it was, a dream. It didn't mean anything, other than maybe she had been single for a bit too long. Maybe she should do something about that.

Well there's an easy way to solve that problem. Twilight is right there.

Damnit brain! I said no! I just need to drop this whole terrible idea.

Despite her chastisement of herself, she continued to secretly watch Twilight go about her day. On the way back to the library, Twilight paused right outside her door. Bending down and giving a cute little moan, she gave one long stretch through her entire body that sent her backside pointing right up into the air. Dash nearly lost it. She tried in vain to push her wings back down to her sides as Twilight disappeared back inside the library. After a few minutes to catch her breath and get her disobedient limbs under control, Rainbow Dash took off. Maybe Applejack needed help bucking some apples.

Rainbow Dash returned to her house at the end of the day, nice and exhausted. Applejack had been rather surprised that Dash was offering, of her own free will, to do anything resembling hard work, but she wasn't about to turn away a free set of hooves and some company for the day. Dash had set about bucking the apple trees with extra vigor, and Applejack had thought she was trying to challenge her to a friendly competition. It soon became one, and they tired themselves out before resuming a more leisurely pace and chatting about this and that for the rest of the day. Dash's troubles had floated away and she hadn't thought anymore about Twilight for the rest of the day. Well, until she had just thought about her right now that was. Dash gave a small sigh as she took a brief shower to wash off all the dirt and sweat she had accumulated during the day. She muttered to herself as she crawled into bed.

"Stupid sexy Twilight."

***

Rainbow Dash woke up with tears in her eyes. She didn't know why at first. It took a few seconds for her mind to wake up enough to register that she was crying, and a few more to remember why.

She had been dreaming again. It hadn't been the racy sensations of her second dream, nor the haze of wild and chaotic emotions of her first dream. It was different. It hadn't even been a particularly sad dream. Quite the opposite in fact. Twilight had just sat there and smiled at her, and she had smiled back. Twilight had leaned her head comfortably against her shoulder, and they had sat there. That was it. Nothing else happened. Dash had never felt more at peace as she just sat there and felt Twilight breathing gently against her side. She couldn't remember ever being this happy. Then it had ended and she had woken up.

It hadn't been real, and Twilight was nowhere to be found. Now she was left laying in her empty bed, staring up at the ceiling through watery eyes as they shed silent tears down the sides of her face. She knew it was pointless to get upset over a dream, but she still felt cheated. As if she had been robbed of something precious. She pulled the cloud blanket over herself as she rolled over and sulked until hunger finally made her get up for a late breakfast. After feeding herself, Rainbow Dash stared at her empty plate, lost in thought.

This was serious, very serious. She was crazy about Twilight and she was losing it. Every thought she had eventually led back to how much she wanted, needed Twilight. How had this happened? When had she started to feel this way? The dreams had only started two days ago and they had hit hard, but it felt as if they were building off of something deeper. Maybe these feelings had been bubbling below the surface for a while, and she had just never realized it until now.

It certainly made sense to her now. How could she not love Twilight? She was wonderful. It would be the most natural thing in the world. How long had she been in love with Twilight without knowing it? More importantly, now that she did know, what was she supposed to do now? Rainbow Dash stood up and began to pace frantically around her house.

What do I do?! What do I do?! Should I talk to her about it? See if she would still be interested? She knew Twilight had once been crazy about her, but that had been a long time ago, and Dash had turned her down. STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! How could you do that?! How could you let the perfect mare slip through your hooves like that?!

Not only had she passed up the chance to be with Twilight, she had broken her heart as well. She had hurt her. Dash hung her head in shame at such a horrible thought. If things worked out, she would have to get Twilight to punch her in the face for being such an idiot. But would they work out? Would Twilight still want to be with her? It had been over a year. Twilight had probably moved on by now.

Sorry Dash, but I just don't feel that way anymore. You may have had a chance if you had acted sooner, but you were just too slow.

No, Twilight wouldn't say anything like that. She would find a much nicer way to phrase it, but that would still be the message. That she had been too late. All she might accomplish would be to reopen old wounds and painful memories.

Still...maybe she did still have feelings for her. There was a chance. Besides, she had to do something. She was losing her mind just standing here and doing nothing. She needed to take some kind of action. Immediate action. Patience had never been one of her virtues, and she certainly wasn't about to start practicing it now. She would fly over right now and tell Twilight how she felt. What would she say? It didn't matter, she would figure something out when she got there. She needed to go now!

Rainbow Dash was only mildly surprised when she noticed that she had already jumped out the door and was quickly leaving her house behind. She sped across town and touched down in front of the library door. She still didn't have a clue what she was going to say. It didn't matter, she wasn't going to let this burst of courage and initiative go to waste. Wasn't going to pass up what could possibly be her last chance. What if today was the last day Twilight held onto feelings for her? She only really needed three words anyway. Rainbow Dash raised her right hoof and knocked.

***

Twilight laid on her couch, completely failing to pay attention to the book in front of her. All she could think about was what Dash was thinking about. Was the spell still working as planned? It certainly seemed to be working when Dash had shown up all flustered two days ago. That had been interesting to watch. She had barely restrained herself from leaning forward and giving her a quick kiss, just to see what would happen.

Still, until yesterday, she had worried that the spell might not continue to hold. That it might dissolve and wear off after she went to sleep again. She had triple checked the calculations, but the doubt had still nagged at her until she had spotted a reflection in a nearby puddle. She spotted Dash following her around and watching her from a cloud. That had lifted her spirits. She was still hoping that Dash would come down and talk to her, but at least she still had her attention. She even put on a little bit of a show for her secret audience, adding a bit more bounce to her step than usual, and giving a little extra swing in her hips as she walked. She had even given one particularly lewd stretch when she had gotten home, and almost thought she could hear a loud *pomf* from behind her as she went inside.

She was now certain that the spell was working properly, but something else was bothering her. Along with the excitement, something else had been growing inside her ever since that night. This morning it had finally reached the point were she was finding it difficult to ignore. A sense of unease. She wouldn't necessarily call it guilt, more like the shadow of guilt. She didn't regret her actions. She had successfully convinced herself that it was okay, and she would do it again given the chance. Rather, she felt like she should be feeling some kind of regret. Some kind of guilt.

Feeling guilty for not feeling guilty? That's just silly.

Still, it was more than that. There was a sense of fear. Fear that she would feel guilt later. Fear that it would tarnish her relationship with Dash. Fear that she would finally have everything she ever wanted and she would be unable to enjoy it because she would be crushed under the weight of guilt brought on by some invisible karmic force.

Twilight's thoughts were interrupted as she was startled by loud, forceful knocking on her door. Was that Dash? She swore if this was another false alarm with Derpy delivering her mail again, or Pinkie inviting her to a party, or somepony else trying to get out of a late fee for an overdue library book, she was going to get heart palpitations from the stress. Taking a deep breath and banishing the excitement and nervousness from her face, she opened the door to see Dash wearing a look of fierce determination.

"Oh, hi Dash. Come on in." With a tremendous effort of will, Twilight forced her voice to remain calm and even, and stepped aside to let Dash in.

"Thanks. Listen Twilight, there's something I need to tell you. Something I only realized recently." Though she kept the bold, determined look on her face, Twilight picked up on the rest of her skittish body language. The light flexing of the wings at her side. The fidgeting of her front hooves while her back legs remained tensed and coiled, as if she were ready to take off any second. The idle twitching of her tail. Though they were much more restrained, Twilight recognized them as the exact same signs she had noticed in Fluttershy the night she had confessed. This was it!

"Twilight, I...I..." As Dash struggled to say the final words, time slowed down as a million thoughts raced through Twilight's mind. Excitement boiled in her brain, but was quickly replaced by the phantom guilt. Right as she was about to reap the rewards of everything she worked and suffered for, fear and regret slammed her like a ton of bricks. What had she done? What was she still doing? She would never be able to forgive herself for this. She had to put a stop to it before it went any further. She could break the spell right now, apologize and beg for forgiveness, accept whatever punishment Celestia could dream up for her, but she had to do it now.

"I...I lo-..." As Dash got closer and closer to finishing her confession, Twilight prepared to summon the magic she would need to undo the effects of the spell. Dash seemed too preoccupied to notice that her horn had started to glow. Just as she was ready to cast, she stopped. As she had done many times before, she hesitated. It was only for a second, but that was all it took. She barely noticed Dash say something that sounded like "OH SCREW IT!" before she lunged forward and kissed her. The glow around Twilight's horn dissipated, along with the rest of her fears, concerns, and worries as she melted into the kiss.

The last bit of guilt and regret dried up and blew away like leaves in the wind.

Author's Note

Sorry this update took so much longer than intended. I kept putting it off to make PMVs, and to start and catchup on shows I had never watched before. Once I did finally sit down and start writing though, man, I really went all out. Hopefully you all like the result. My only concern is that now it makes some of my earlier chapters look like crap. Or maybe it doesn't. I don't know. Let me know what you think. I also hope you liked the smattering of neuroscience I managed to work in there. And oh, what's this? A double post? That's right. A shiny epilogue waits for you.

Epilogue

Twilight gently opened her eyes to her bedroom. She felt a comfortable warmth coming from her back. A cyan foreleg was wrapped tightly around her chest, and a matching wing lay gently draped over her side. She could see it gently rise and fall in time with the soft breathing she heard coming from behind her. Her lips still tingled at the memory of the passionate kiss they had shared. How it had felt like a flare going off in her brain before dissolving the rest of her mind into pure bliss. How it had ended all too soon, but quickly been replaced by another, and then another.

She remembered the fire that had grown inside both of them as they crashed into the bookshelves, knocking down books that still lay scattered around the floor downstairs. She remembered how they had continued their whirling tornado of amorous destruction all the way up the stairs. She blushed as she remembered what had happened next. How they had made up for all that lost time. She blushed even harder at the prospect of more later. After all, they had the entire weekend until Spike got back.

She had pulled it off. She finally had everything she wanted, and it was wonderful. It certainly hadn't been easy, and she had had her share of doubts, but in the end she had defied fate and earned her happy ending.

She knew others might disagree. They would call her a monster for what she had done. One of the worst criminals in Equestrian history. By some ponies' definitions, she was probably a rapist too. She didn't care what anypony else thought. She loved Dash, and Dash loved her. They made each other happy, and that was all that mattered. The love she saw in Dash's eyes was as real as anything else. The kisses they shared were real. The way Dash held her tightly, as if she would never let go. That was real. The happiness she made Dash feel when she squeezed her back. That was real, and it felt right. Let the world call her a monster, she didn't care. She knew that something that felt so right couldn't possibly be wrong.

"mmm...Twilight..." Dash mumbled in her sleep and squeezed tighter. "I love you."

Twilight smiled as she closed her eyes again. "I love you too, Dash."

Author's Note

Well here we are. The end. I told you I wasn't sure if this counted as a good or bad end for Twilight (I'm leaning toward good). Regardless, I had a crazy amount of fun writing this fic. As I said at the beginning, this was the first fanfiction I had ever written for anything. I wasn't sure that I had any kind of writing skills. Thanks to all of your positive support and encouragement, I realized that I do have some ability, and was able to refine and improve upon it to make the story better and better. Thanks you to everyone who liked, favorited, and left a comment. I certainly can't say that I didn't love the attention. You've swelled my head enough that now I'm going to try submitting to Equestria Daily.

Thank You All.

Chapter 1

Twilight Sparkle had never considered herself much of a romantic. Not in the sense that she lacked an appreciation of aesthetics or the beauty of nature (to the contrary she had actually penned a few poems during her long nights of studying the stars), rather, it was the concept of romantic love that she thought not worth her time. Of course, being the studious pony she was, she had attempted a fair investigation into the subject. She made observations on the antics of the Canterlot ponies her age, smitten with their first schoolyard crushes, and poured through stacks of romance novels, plays, and love songs. The bits about “love at first sight” seemed horrifically shallow, and the talk of “undying eternal love” and “soulmates” seemed needlessly hyperbolic and unrealistic.

Her parents claimed to love each other and they had always gotten along well together, but it seemed more like a quiet, peaceful thing between two ponies with compatible personalities. Twilight had concluded that the condition most ponies commonly referred to as love was in fact a small bit of compatibility mixed with hormones and dressed up in fancy language until it was mistaken for something profound. Furthermore, it was a condition she was in no hurry to be afflicted with.

From what she could tell, this 'love' tended to turn even previously reasonable ponies into simpering heaps of irrationality. If the colts and fillies weren’t taking idiotic actions to win, hold onto, or win back affections, then they were staring into each other’s eyes being nauseating. One of the plays she had read, a widely renowned classic by Shakespony, involved a first meeting, a marriage, and a pointless double suicide in the span of four days. Avid bibliophile that she was, she would never intentionally harm any book, but sweet Celestia had she been tempted to chuck that trash out of her tower window.

Twilight Sparkle had spent her life refining her intellect and shaping her mind into a paragon of logic and rationality. The thought of anything destroying her judgment in such a way was enough to send shivers down her spine. Yes, Twilight Sparkle would have been quite happy to live the rest of her life without suffering the debilitating effects of the disease called love. Unfortunately for her, the universe had other plans, all starting with a particularly vivid dream that struck one summer night.

***

Twilight pushed through the crowd of ponies. Where was she? Some kind of party. The Gala? A quick glance at the formally dressed ponies around her and at her own fancy dress confirmed it. There was something that she needed to find. No. Somepony she desperately needed to find for some reason.

She continued to search through the endless crowd, not sure exactly who she was looking for until she spotted a flash of color disappear through a door. Yes. It was definitely Rainbow Dash. She had to catch up to her and tell her . . . something . . . something important. She made her way through the door and found herself in the palace hedge maze. She charged ahead, a sense of urgency and dread growing in her stomach. She didn’t know why she was chasing after Rainbow Dash. Driven by some instinctive need, she just knew that she had to find Rainbow Dash soon or she might lose her chance forever.

As she ran deeper and deeper into the maze with no sign of Dash in sight, the feeling of unease and tension in her stomach blossomed into a cold panic as she broke into a full gallop. Shadows closed in around her vision and the walls seemed to fall away, leaving her in a pitch black void with only a small light off in the distance. Underneath that faint light she saw an unmistakable splash of rainbow colored mane.

Twilight galloped toward the light as fast as she could. She ran with mad desperation, as though she were drowning and the single speck of light and its occupant were the surface, taunting her with their promise of oxygen to fill her burning lungs. She tried to call out, but found she could make only the tiniest of inaudible squeaks. No matter how much she ran, the small island of light didn’t seem to be getting any closer. In fact, the only change she noticed was that everything seemed to be fading and blurring, as if someone had twisted the focus on one of her telescopes. Tears stung her eyes. Her pulse pounded in her ears like a malevolent timer counting down to a missed deadline. She saw the blurred form of the pegasus vanish before her eyes and gave a final cry of loss and despair before snapping her eyes open to a pleasant summer morning.

***

Twilight continued to lay in bed for a while, waiting for the adrenaline to work its way out of her system and for her heart rate to settle down. Already the details of the dream were blurring, the sequence of events becoming lost in the haze of memory, but the emotional impact, that feeling of desperation remained crystal clear. Pieces fell into place in her mind.

Really, it was obvious in hindsight. The extra bit of cheer she had when talking to a certain somepony, the bit of melancholy when having to part ways, the slightly greater than average disappointment when plans involving them had to be canceled or delayed. They all seemed to have been brought into focus by this one random dream. The haze of confusing emotions and sensations had crystallized into one inescapable truth. She was in love with Rainbow Dash.

“This is ridiculous.” Twilight muttered to herself as she jumped out of bed and began to pace back and forth across her bedroom. “This kind of thing isn’t supposed to happen to me. No. I am a rational, level headed pony, and I refuse to allow this.” Twilight stopped pacing to give a determined shake of her head, the matter now resolved.

“Yes. Rainbow is only a friend. A good platonic friend, with strictly platonic grace and beauty, who platonically brings joy to the room with her presence, whose platonic shapely flank-” this was going to be harder than she thought. A smell drifting up from downstairs caught her attention and elicited a growl from her stomach. Breakfast. Yes, breakfast would make the world make sense again.

Aside from less hungry, Twilight Sparkle did not feel any different after finishing her breakfast. She spent the rest of the day thinking about Dash, or rather trying not to think about Dash, which was much the same thing.

“No need to rush into hasty conclusions. Maybe there's another explanation. A perfectly reasonable explanation. I was hanging out with Rarity yesterday and she was going on and on about one of her silly romance novels. I've also been spending a lot of time with Dash this past week. My recent activities are just blending together in my subconscious and being formed into a loose narrative structure. Yep, perfectly reasonable explanation. Problem solved."

If you overlook the reason why you've been so adamant about spending so much time with Dash recently. Contrast how you practically run when on your way to meet with her with your lingering slow crawl away when saying goodbye. Then there's that tingling feeling that sweeps over your body whenever you're less than two meters away, always starting from the side closest to Dash. Yes, aside from all that, problem solved.

They say that the easiest pony to fool is yourself. Twilight disagreed. She had spent her life honing her analytical skills, training herself to separate out emotional arguments and personal biases so she could cut through to the underlying facts and logic. From her studies of cognitive science, she had read that even the smartest of ponies could easily have their personal judgement clouded. Since then, she had rigorously practiced deep introspection. Carefully picking apart what she knew and how she knew it. Viciously tearing apart her own arguments until she was sure they were solid. Twilight Sparkle, if anything, was the hardest pony for Twilight Sparkle to fool.

Yes I enjoy spending time with Rainbow Dash. As a friend. I enjoy spending time with all of my friends.

So I suppose you'd be just as happy if your plans to spend the day with Dash were canceled and replaced with Rarity or Pinkie instead?

Okay, fine. There's a bit of a difference. I really enjoy spending time with Rainbow Dash. We get along very well. And I tend to think about her fairly frequently when she's not around. And I might . . . maybe . . . find her a bit attractive. But that's it! I'm not in love!

Right. So you're just physically attracted to her and obsess over spending time with her to the point that your thoughts keep straying back at random times?

Yes.

Okay. So you're not in love. You're just in a state that's categorically indistinguishable from love, yet somehow completely different. By the way, I recently discovered this fascinating new species of bird. It looks and behaves exactly like a duck, follows the same diet, can even interbreed with regular ducks! I plan to submit a report to the Canterlot Zoological society right away!

OH SHUT UP!

By the end of the day, Twilight Sparkle had come to accept the inevitable conclusion. She was smitten and smitten hard. She hoped this wouldn't spell the end of her existence as a rational being. She still felt mostly the same, just with a slight reordering of priorities. Up with the drives to eat and sleep, was a new addition of 'be around Rainbow Dash'. For the moment she could still hold coherent thoughts. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. She would just have to wait and see.

***Three months later***

Twilight carefully mixed the acrid smelling powders in the small bowls in front of her, careful to keep them dry and away from any possible source of moisture. She also wore a small band around her right hoof to avoid any unwanted static discharge. Blowing the library into tiny flaming pieces wasn't how she wanted to start her day. Despite the slow, methodical caution in her movements, she was brimming with energy. Today was an important day. After 3 months, today was the day she acted on her feelings. Today was the day she confessed her love to Rainbow Dash.

She had been pleasantly surprised to find that her new found feelings hadn't degraded her cognitive capabilities as she feared they would. She still felt as sharp as she had before. She still ran the library efficiently and kept up with her studies and private experiments. Even her interactions with Dash hadn't fundamentally changed, she had just become aware of certain things she had been doing for a while. Little efforts to catch Dash's attention. How she steered the conversation either towards little things she had accomplished that day, in an attempt to make herself look impressive, or towards flight and aeronautics if she though Dash might be losing interest in the conversation.

At first, Twilight had been content to simply spend time around Rainbow Dash in any social situation, but over time, the small itch began to grow. First she simply wanted more time with Dash. Then more time with her alone. She wanted her undivided attention. She wanted Dash to look at her, hold her, kiss her. She had started to develop difficulties falling asleep at night. Action needed to be taken, so Twilight had turned her brilliant mind to the task of finding the perfect way to woo Rainbow Dash.

Now the day had finally come for her plans to bear fruit. She had agonized over the perfect way to declare her feelings, and had come up with something that fit Rainbow Dash perfectly. Surprisingly, she had gotten the idea from Trixie of all ponies. Twilight mixed another cup of copper sulfate into the large bowl of black powder in front of her.

First she would head over to the party at Sugarcube Corner. Dash had some kind of big announcement to share with all of them. The fact that it was to be followed with a party indicated that it was good news. She would tell Dash that she wanted to talk to her about something important after the party. After a fun evening with friends, the two of them would head out. She'd tell her that there was something she needed her opinion on and they would drop by the library to pick up her packages before heading out to the perfect secluded hill she had found for the occasion.

Then the air would be filled with technicolor explosions. A fiery version of Rainbow Dash would swoop around the sky doing tricks before crashing into an image of herself, recreating their first meeting. A little montage of the two ponies laughing and playing together would follow, with little hearts forming above the sky Twilight's head. Finally, it would end with a big explosion spelling out “I LOVE YOU” in big rainbow letters. It sure wasn't subtle, but subtlety and Rainbow Dash had never been on good terms.

It had taken a week of reading up on chemistry, pyrotechnics, and the necessary magic to make these enchanted fireworks, but it would all be worth it. Twilight couldn't help fidgeting a little in excitement as she poured the powder into the last of her paper wrapped packages, secured the fuse, and placed it next to the others.

“Alright. Operation Procure Paramour with Polychromatic Pyrotechnic Performance is a go.”

Twilight lightly giggled to herself as she skipped out the door on her way to Sugarcube Corner. She was vaguely aware of a grin plastered across her face as she thought about what kind of stunned expressions might run across Dash's face that night. A part of her mind tried to preach caution over getting her hopes up prematurely, but it wasn't having much success. Even if Dash didn't fall for her on the spot (or confess to secretly harboring the same feelings for her all along) it would make a good first step in the wooing process.

At worst she could say she actually tried. Her most likely predicted scenario involved a stunned Rainbow Dash tentatively agreeing to a trial first date. Her best case scenario . . . well, she had made sure to send Spike away for a sleepover with the crusaders for the weekend. It was at Rarity's place so he had no objections. Not that she expected things to go THAT well, but it was better to be prepared.

Practically floating, Twilight finally arrived at Sugarcube Corner to find Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie already helping themselves to refreshments while music played in the background. In typical Pinkie Pie fashion, balloons and streamers hung off of every surface. There also seemed to be a cord running up to a large canvas on the ceiling that looked heavily loaded with what Twilight assumed was more balloons and confetti. Pinkie looked like she was barely restraining herself from pulling the cord. It seemed they were just waiting for Fluttershy to arrive so the big announcement could be made. She quickly found Dash by the punch bowl and trotted over next to her.

“What's up Twilight? How's it going?” Rainbow Dash asked, completely unaware of the effect even a simple greeting had on Twilight's knees when uttered by that heavenly voice.

“Fine. I'm doing fine. Listen, there's something important I need to talk to you about when-”

“Hang on, Fluttershy just arrived. Do you mind if we pick this up after the announcement? I wanna get this outta the way as soon as possible.”

“Sure, no problem.” Twilight patiently responded as she gathered with her friends in front of an impromptu stage (really just some plywood on top of some cinderblocks). She guessed this news involved Applejack too, seeing as how she was standing next to Dash on the stage. As Pinkie turned off the music, Twilight leaned forward, eagerly awaiting the news.

“Well as y'all can probably guess, this bit ah news involves the both of us, but Rainbow was mighty insistent that she be the one to tell ya.”

“Thanks AJ. Well first of all, it's actually been going on for a while now. Pinkie already found out but we made her promise to keep quiet in exchange for letting her organize the party when we were ready.” Pinkie could be seen in the corner pantomiming locking her lips with a key, burying it, then building a house on top of it. “Anyway, I don't want to bore you with the whole story, so the short of it is, AJ and I are together. We're dating!”

Then Rainbow Dash turned and gave Applejack a long and passionate kiss, to the cheering of their friends, as Twilight Sparkle's world shattered and fell around her like the thousands of pieces of confetti falling past her head.

Author's Note

Well here goes, my first fanfiction ever. Gonna say right up front that I am NOT a writer. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing here. Let me know how obvious it was for you. I decided to write this because the idea just wouldn't get out of my head. Doing some TwiDash because they are best and second best ponies and taking a slightly sadder and darker turn because I'm a terrible person and there's too much happiness in the world. I know where I'm going to take the story, but haven't worked out whether I want the ending happy, soul crushing, or something in between. Advice and feedback is requested, especially on how to blend dialogue into description in an aesthetically pleasing way. At the moment the plan is to just stay really low on the dialogue. I'm sure there's grammar mistakes in there as I'm writing this at ridiculous hours of the night instead of sleeping. Feel free to draw my attention to them.

Chapter 10

It was a gorgeous day in Ponyville. The sun streamed down in bright rays that spread a warm tingling sensation wherever they hit. The smallest of gentle breezes wafted by, preventing one from becoming uncomfortably hot under the brilliant radiance and keeping a perfect temperature. It was all the benefits of curling up indoors, underneath a sunbeam from a window, with the addition of fresh air and the smell of grass and wildflowers that the wind carried with it.

Perfect day for a picnic, Twilight thought to herself as she started laying out the blanket and supplies. In addition to the usual sandwich fare, there was a variety of puddings, small cakes, and pastries that looked especially delicious. She saw her picnic partner approaching over the hill and gave a quick wave.

Rainbow Dash waved back as she slowed her approach and landed elegantly beside Twilight before placing a quick kiss on her cheek. Twilight blushed and felt her knees tremble a bit. It was silly how much she still reacted to the simplest things. How long had they been dating now?

"That is still the cutest thing ever." Dash unleashed a few restrained giggles at her. It was the most beautiful sound in the world to Twilight. "Wow, this looks delicious! Let's get started!"

They both happily started in on their lunch, but Twilight couldn't even taste the food. She was far too occupied stealing glances over at the beautiful pony next to her to concentrate on anything else. She caught Dash glancing back at her as well, a smile on her face. A beautiful cyan wing reached out and gracefully wrapped around Twilight's shoulder before gently pulling her in. She gave a deep sigh of bliss as she was pressed firmly against the warm, soft side of her marefriend. She never wanted to move from this spot again.

"I love you Rainbow Dash," Twilight said as she nuzzled into Dash's chest.

"Ha! I kinda figured that out by now. You say it all the time."

"I can't help it, it's true. I want to keep saying it and never stop. I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I-" Twilight was interrupted by a kiss that set her mind and body on fire. Strong legs and wings wrapped her in a loving cocoon and pulled her in tight while her tongue danced and her mind melted into incoherent bliss. When it finally ended, she was left in an impossible combination of satisfied serenity and a burning hunger for more. How was it she could feel contentment and avarice at the same time?

"I love you too Twilight. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it. You're the best thing that ever happened to me and I want to stay with you forever."

The look of sincere love shining behind those magenta eyes filled Twilight with so much joy that it actually hurt. It felt as though she might burst from too much happiness. Truly, she must be the luckiest pony in the world. To have such a wonderful marefriend whom she deeply loved, and knew loved her just as much in return.

It was still hard to wrap her head around that concept. Dash loved her back! The one pony she wanted to be near wanted nothing but the same! She knew she could never possibly hope to deserve such happiness. She held her love tight, as if afraid she might blow away in the wind. As if sensing her thoughts, Rainbow Dash bent her head to whisper into her ear.

"I promise I'll never leave. I'll always be here. Always."

Twilight shuddered as Dash nipped at her ear and then proceeded to nuzzle her neck. It had been perfect, these past few weeks. How long had it been again? Twilight found she couldn't quite exactly recall how much time had passed since that night when Dash had realized her feelings for her. Come to think of it, the whole event had been kind of a blur. She couldn't really remember what had happened. The small concern was quickly pushed away as she went back to enjoying Dash's affection. The past was gone, better to look forward to their wonderful future together.

The kisses that Dash was laying on her neck were increasing in speed and intensity. More of them involved teeth. Twilight felt her heart rate increasing rapidly, and her breath was starting to come out in short gasps. She caught Dash's eyes in hers again, and saw a fire burning within them. Twilight used her magic to unceremoniously fling the sundry dishes away, not caring where they landed as she cleared a space for them on the blanket.

Flinging her front legs around Dash's neck and pulling them both down onto the blanket, Twilight pushed forward for another kiss. This time, something felt...off. Not that Dash was responding with less passion, it just felt like Twilight's senses were being dulled, numbed. She didn't feel the lips against her own, and even the wings wrapped around her started to feel less substantial. She couldn't taste anything either, couldn't find any satisfaction.

Twilight pushed in harder, pouring more passion into the kiss, but every tactile sensation felt less real, more like the ethereal brush of a ghost. Panic gripped her as her vision swam, and the details of her surroundings began to blur. She realized that what she was tasting wasn't quite the blankness of air, but more like the empty taste of the fabric of her pillow case. Finally realizing what was happening, she tried to hold onto Dash as tightly as she could as the landscape started to dissolve around them, crying and screaming, and trying to hold the world together for a few more precious seconds. Dash seemed worried as well, a look of pain and confusion stuck on her face. Twilight's hooves passed through thin air as Rainbow Dash turned to smoke in her arms, leaving only a rough and blurry outline that could barely be seen.

"Please don't leave me." Those were the last words spoken by the phantom Rainbow Dash before the dream ended.

Twilight's eyes remained closed. She stared at the back of her eyelids, willing herself to fall back asleep, trying in vain to bring the world back to life.

NO! I have to go back! I have to go back now! She's waiting for me! I can't leave her behind! Please!

Tears leaked out from behind her closed eyelids as she buried her face in the pillow that lay wrapped in her arms, corner damp from where she had been chewing on it.

A year. It had been a full Celestia damned year since that letter. She thought it was behind her.

The use of letters had turned out to be a good decision. Dash and herself had managed to continue on as if the whole incident had never occurred. There was no awkwardness between them as neither of them ever brought the subject up. All that needed to be said had been said and they had continued their close friendship without a hitch. Twilight was incredibly grateful for that.

Neither of them had found anypony else yet, a point that had occasionally led her objections to resurface in her mind, but they had finally settled over time. It seemed that finally confessing her feelings had given her some kind of closure on the situation. At least she finally had an answer, as much as she disliked it. She would always care for Dash, but as the days turned to weeks and weeks to months, she thought about her less and less. There was a point where Twilight realized she had gone almost a whole two days without thinking about Rainbow Dash once. She could even hang out with Rainbow Dash without the horrible melancholy setting in and ruining the rest of her evening when it was over.

Life went on. She had adventures with her friends, and they had even saved Equestria again from yet another horrible, apocalyptic disaster using the power of friendship. She continued to look after the library while she studied and researched. It seemed her wounds were finally healed, and she had finally found her chance at peace. Until now.

With one horrible, wonderful dream, her subconscious had torn all the wounds back open. All the feelings had come rushing back, blazing brighter and stronger than they ever had before, as if making up for lost time. Twilight sobbed into her pillow. She had been so sure this time. So sure that she had moved on, that she could have a chance to be happy again, and it had all been cruelly torn away. Just as the dream Dash had disappeared from her arms.

How long is it going to take?! Another year? Two years? Ten?! I can't do it! Celestia help me, I just can't do it!

It wasn't as if she had a choice though. There wasn't a thing she could do to change her situation. She felt helpless as she stared into a future of unending misery. Crushed beneath hopelessness and despair, something in Twilight's mind finally snapped. A small voice she had been ignoring pushed its way to the front of her consciousness and spoke.

Look at you. Pathetic. Why don't you go out there and get her?

I can't. She just doesn't love me. There's nothing I can do.

You know that's not true. You know exactly what you can do to fix this entire situation. You've always known.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Liar! You know exactly what to do. You've just been too much of a coward to follow through! You have the power, but you lack the force of will!

NO! I can't! I'm not supposed to do that! Never again!

Why not?

Because it's wrong! Horribly unethical and wrong!

And there it is. You still care more about staying a "good and ethical pony" than you do about being with Dash. Shouldn't that be the ONLY thing that matters? It seems as if you just don't care enough.

NO! There's nothing I care more about!

As long as you hold yourself back with the chains of what's considered "ethical", you'll continue to be miserable. You're only torturing yourself in the end.

Was she really considering this? If she went through with this, nopony could ever know. Friends and family would disown her, Celestia would probably have her locked away in a dungeon. Twilight felt her last bit of resistance draining away.

I...okay. But will it work?

The other voice in her head, the one that sounded exactly like her own, replied with what sounded like a smile, if voices could have smiles.

Of course it will. Works...Every...Time.

Author's Note

Awww Yeah! Time for things to get interesting and for the dark tag to finally come out. Gonna have fun with this. I know this is back to being criminally short, but it's a nice little intro into the third act, and I wanted to torture you all with that cIiffhanger. If you don't get what this is referring to, then I am disappointed in you. Bonus points if you can guess what related song is currently playing in my head.

Edits and Sequel Information

Went and polished up the first chapter. No drastic story changes so you won't miss anything if you don't want to go back and read it over again, just a quick polishing to bring it a bit closer to par with the later chapters. It was my first stab at writing, so it lagged a bit behind the others in quality. I had been meaning to do it forever, but somehow procrastinated for months.

In more exciting news, I do sorta kinda have a VERY rough idea for a sequel. No idea when such a thing would become a reality though. There are some major snarls I'd have to plan out (I have no idea how I would actually resolve it) and I'm extremely lazy on top being in school again and possibly landing an actual job soon. In the mean time however, the talented SerenityViewer has started an unofficial sequel called Where the Gentle Wing Rests with my full blessing and support. He's been nearly obsessive with running everything by me for final approval to make sure the feel and characterization matches up with my vision from Tomorrow, and I've had a heavy hand in the editing process so every chapter has my seal of approval. If you like Tomorrow, you'll probably like this. My own sequel, if and when it ever gets written, is going to go in a very different direction, but I'm perfectly happy to accept Where the Gentle Wing Rests as an alternate scenario (I'm actually glad they're taking different routes because then I'd be worried mine would have some serious competition). So yeah, you guys should check it out and give feedback. Authors love feedback. Also feel free to demand I get off my lazy ass and writing with shouts of "MOAR!" When the guilt gets strong enough, it does occasionally motivate me to get stuff done.

(03/20/2015) Finally went back to this fic and reformatted it, breaking all those walls of text into more bite size paragraphs and removing the worst of the Lavender Unicorn Syndrome. Nothing changed story wise, so you don't have to reread everything. Don't know what happened to Where The Gentle Wing rests, but it appears to be disappeared and abandoned. The official sequel Heart of Loyalty is still going strong at over 50k words.

(02/16/2020) Heart of Loyalty is now officially finished after a shamefully long time of repeatedly disappearing for over a year.