The One With The Short Attention Span
The sun looks so happy! Look at it! It’s shining and saying hello and giving everyone warm hugs! And the clouds are so fluffy and white and doesn't it make you just want to bounce up there and hug them? And the grass is so green, look at it!
“Pinkie, pay attention!” whispered a voice.
Sorry … let me start over.
It was a very beautiful and happy day in Ponyville. Princess Twilight Sparkle decided to go for a walk to … to, uh … to Sweet Apple Acres! Yes! So, on her way to Sweet Apple Acres she happened to bump into Rarity, the technically white coated unicorn. The two friends smiled sheepishly at each other.
“Oh, hey Rarity,” Twilight said.
“Hello, darling…,” Rarity said, shifting nervously.
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Are you all right?”
Rarity nodded quickly because she was clearly nervous about something.
Twilight kept her eyebrow raised.
Rarity shiftily looked around. “Well, if you’ll excuse me …”
“Wait!” Twilight called to her, “where are you going?”
“Home,” Rarity mumbled.
“Where did you just come from?” Twilight questioned like she was in the CIA or something of that effect.
“Nowhere,” Rarity answered quickly.
Twilight raised her eyebrow again … wow, it’s really up there! Man, look how high it can get! Wow!
Rarity smiled nervously—that kind of smile when your bosses specifically tell you “one cupcake only, Pinkie!” and you end up eating the entire batch and then you feel guilty and nervous and there’s a billion parasprites in your tummy which is the end result of eating a dozen cupcakes and afraid of getting in trouble mixed into one giant feeling.
“Well, I’m about to go visit Applejack, care to join me?”
“No, that’s quite all right,” Rarity answered quickly.
“Come on, Rarity. Applejack’s been working all day, she needs her friends!” Twilight smiled like a little filly.
Rarity chuckled half-heartedly. “O-okay….”
So then two of my bestest friends made their way to the farm of one of my other bestest friends! Their walk was really boring and I don’t want to get into detail. So, boom! They’re at the farm now!
Applejack, the orange earth pony, was bucking apples into a large bucket. That’s basically what she does all day everyday.
“Hey Applejack!” Twilight shouted really loudly.
“H-hey!” Applejack stammered in her weird accent—which is weird, because it seems like the Apples are the only ponies with Southern accents … where did they even come from?—when she saw them.
Rarity blushed, which was noticeable against her technically white coat. “Hello, darling.”
Applejack blushed as well. Oh, hey, she looks like an apple now!
Twilight looked at Rarity, then at Applejack. “Ooookay, that wasn’t weird at all.”
Just then, Rainbow Dash, the super fast pegasus pony with the really colorful hair and even more colorful attitude, landed beside Applejack. “How was that, AJ?” she said with a wink.
“Tha’ was great, sugarcube!” Applejack fanned herself with her big hat.
Rainbow Dash nudged Applejack. “Thanks!”
Applejack blushed and looked down, scraping her hoof on the dirt slightly.
Rarity looked at Applejack, and the at Rainbow Dash. She made a super duper angry face, kinda like she was holding in a burp. Like what Spike does! Speaking of Spike….
“Hey guys!” Spike said while running up to the four bestest friends.
“Hello, Spikey-wikey,” Rarity said … which is what she always says.
Spike blushed. It’s like a blushing party!
Rarity turned her attention back on Applejack.
“Wha’ are ya doin’ here again?” Applejack smiled to Rarity.
“Again?” Twilight and Rainbow Dash asked in unison.
“Yeah, she was jus’ ‘ere not five minutes ago—” Applejack stopped talking suddenly and smiled sheepishly, blushing.
Twilight turned to Rarity and raised an eyebrow.
“Heh….” Rarity chuckled.
Rainbow Dash glared at Applejack. “What was she doing here, AJ?”
Rarity smiled fabulously at Applejack. “Yes, do tell her, ‘AJ.’”
“Or maybe,” Rainbow Dash said, “you can tell her what I’m doing here.”
“Yes, what is she doing here, Applejack?”
“Go on, tell her!”
“Do tell!”
Applejack shifted her gaze nervously between the two bickering ponies.
Rainbow Dash and Rarity were now muzzle to muzzle, raising their voices in anger.
“She probably doesn’t even want you here, darling!”
“Pfft, if anything she doesn’t want you here, miss ‘I don’t like mud!’”
Rarity gasped. “I’ll have you know she does want me here!”
“She wants me here!”
“Me!”
“Me!”
"Me! Right, Applejack?” Rarity said, turning to Applejack.
“Me! Right, AJ?” Rainbow Dash turned to Applejack.
“Enough!” Twilight said, raising her voice. “What’s going on?!”
“Applejack is cheating on me!” Rarity whined.
“That’s right she is!” Rainbow Dash smirked. “With me….”
Everyone, including Spike, gasped in horror. What was really going on here? A secret love triangle? So many plot twists!
“Who do you chose, Applejack?” Rarity fumed.
Rainbow Dash just smirked like she always does because she’s so cocky and has a reaaaally big ego.
Applejack sighed and looked down. “Why me?” she mumbled. "Out of all tha mares, why me?"
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. "Well, AJ?"
Applejack looked up at the two mares and sighed heavily. "The thang is—"
Applejack looked at Rarity, then at Rainbow Dash. She sighed again, then nodded. This was going to be a tough decision for her, obviously. The three mares stared at Applejack, waiting eagerly for her response. Finally, Twilight grew restless and frowned like she always does. She's so mad all the time, you know?
"Who do you pick?!" Twilight yelled, disturbed at what has been going on between her friends.
Applejack thought for another moment, then said, "both?" followed by a smirk.
Author's Note
Told from Pinkie Pie's perspective ... there she goes, off on tangents.
Applejack and Rarity stared at Pinkie Pie in sheer annoyance. They obviously didn’t like the story as much as Rainbow Dash did, who was blushing heavily off to the side.
Pinkie Pie snort-laughed. “Didja guys like my story? Huh, huh?”
“N-no!” Applejack stammered. "It was terrible!"
“Worse than Rainbow Dash’s,” Rarity agreed.
“Hey!” Rainbow Dash shot a look at Rarity.
Twilight was shaking her head in incredulity, mumbling unintelligible things under her breath.
"Is this what you think goes on between us?" Rarity rolled her eyes, clearly not pleased.
"I dunno! It's just a story, jeez!" Pinkie giggled.
"Unbelievable," Twilight mumbled loud enough for the other mares to hear.
"I know! It was unbelievable, wasn't it?!" Pinkie chirped.
“W-why wasn’t I in it?” Fluttershy mumbled.
“You were, silly!” Pinkie chirped.
“She was?” Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow, and Twilight asked in unison.
"Well, duh!" Pinkie giggled. “She was the tree!”
Facehoof.
