Twilight Sparkle and the Terribly Inconvenient Boner.

Twilight Sparkle woke up with a boner.

She didn't realize it at first, groggy as she was in those first moments of wakefulness. It first registered when she rolled over to get the morning sunlight out of her eyes, only to find she'd rolled onto something...firm.

Is that a hairbrush? Twilight thought to herself. She groped blindly beneath the sheets. Once she closed her fingers around the offending object, it jolted her out of her dreamy haze. Something felt different. Something felt...nice.

That's...not a hairbrush.

Twilight bit her lip and rolled onto her back. Sure enough, there was...something jutting proudly, inconveniently upwards, tenting the thin fabric of her bedsheet. Twilight braced herself with a steadying breath, and then pulled the sheet away. She gasped- both at the sudden feeling of exposure, and the sight before her.

Sure enough, she had a penis.

She knew what it was from biology texts she'd read (along with the occasional book of tasteful erotica, not that she would ever tell anyone). She'd never seen one in the flesh before, though, and she certainly didn't expect to see it under these circumstances.

It stood proud and hard, holding up the hem of her short nightie. Experimentally, Twilight poked her newest piece of anatomy, causing it to wobble just a little. She would've laughed, if the situation wasn't so bizzare. Seeing the male genetalia flop around was funny, she had to admit. Twilight briefly recalled a book she'd read on ancient comedy and satyr plays.

“Wait, that's it!” Twilight said aloud, “Research! There's got to be a perfectly scientific explaination for...this.” She glanced downwards again, now only slightly perplexed by the situation. “And I'm gonna find out what it is.”

The first step, Twilight decided, was observation. She walked over to the mirror in the corner of her room and observed herself. She started by peeling off her white nightie- she had to make sure that nothing else had changed.

It was awkward enough standing naked in front of the mirror under normal circumstances, but with the addition of a cock, Twilight couldn't help but blush. Everything was in its place, at least. Her hair was still long and purple (not to mention sleep-frazzled, given the early hour). Her skin was still the pale tone she knew, and her body was still the slim, slightly curved one she was familiar with.

Except, of course, for her dick.

Twilight blushed, scolding herself for using something other than the proper anatomical term. Twilight had aquired a pair of balls- testicles, too, pulled up tight in the open air. Twilight gingerly ran her fingers down the length of her new genitalia, and shivered. Don't get distracted. She told herself.

Twilight pulled up a chair and rested one foot on it, awkwardly posing in front of the mirror, trying to get the best look at...herself. As far as she could tell, her new di- penis -her new penis had replaced her female genitalia completely. There were no scars or seams or fasteners or any indication that this new equipment was a recent development.

It looks real, at least. I wonder if it's...functional?

Twilight licked her dry lips, and took hold of herself. Her shaft twitched at the sensation, craving for more. Twilight tightened her grip around her shaft, and began to stroke back and forth, up and down, all the while marveling at the alien sensation that coursed through her. Twilight got harder, which was something she didn't know was even possible.

She braced one hand on the edge of the wall-mounted mirror, and watched herself jack off. Her hand moved faster and faster, the sudden movements making her breasts jiggle.

Twilight barely recognized the girl in the mirror. It wasn't the sizeable cock (at least, not entirely)- but it was the blush in her cheeks, the stiffness of her nipples, the need in her eyes as she frantically pleasured herself.

I look hot. Twilight thought.

Twilight gritted her teeth, and gasped out, feeling her prick suddenly pump a long and messy spurt of white come out onto her mirror. A second burst came, and then a third, as Twilight Sparkle had her first, messy orgasm with her new anatomy.

Shivering in pleasure, Twilight staggered backward until she could flop back down on the bed.

Okay, it works.

“Hey, Twilight! You awake yet?” Spike's voice came from the other side of the door. “I've got your day's schedule all written up- you didn't forget, did you?”

“Nope!” Twilight snapped out of her post-orgasmic haze and burrowed back down into the sheets. “Didn't forget! Just, um, slept late, that's all!”

“Figures.” Spike's voice said from the other side of the door. “Anyway, can I come in? You said you wanted to double-check the schedule first thing in the morning.”

“No!” Twilight said, a little too loud, a little too quick. “I mean, um. It's okay, Spike. I'm sure it's good to go. Just...slide it under the door, yeah! That's it.”

“Whatever you say.” A single sheet of 9x11 paper slid beneath the door. “You feeling okay?”

“Yes! Fine! Everything's fine!” Twilight said, if a little too quickly. “I'm just, uh...in the middle of a new book! I don't want anyone disturbing me until I finish this chapter. Sorry!”

“Got it,” Spike said from the other side of the door.

“In fact, Spike- why don't you take the day off? I'm...I'm really into this book, and could use some quiet at the library.”

“You sure?”

“Absolutely!”

“But what about your schedule?”

“Oh, right, I'll be working on that, too. Just...reading inbetween. But go on, Spike. I'll be fine.” Twilight winced at the lie.

“Kay!” Spike said, and Twilight heard his footsteps walking off.

Still nude, Twilight Sparkle tiptoed to her door and turned the lock, just in case. She bent over, then picked up the day's checklist, scanning over it.

10 AM: Appt with Rarity

11:30 AM: Swimming with Pinkie Pie & Rainbow Dash

1 PM: Tea at Fluttershy's cottage. Bring cookies.

3 PM Onward: Recreational Research.

Really, Twilight mused, it was a rather light schedule. She could cancel her appointments, sure- but at the same time, her friends would get concerned, and start asking questions...questions Twilight didn't want to answer. No, the best plan would be to just go along with everything as normal, and then, once she was free in the afternoon, she'd have all the time she needed to solve her unexpected...problem, with nobody the wiser! It wasn't a perfect plan, and one that had far too many variables to keep track of...but it was the best she could think of.

But first, Twilight thought, looking down at herself, I need a cold shower.