The Fly

by Inthend

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 1676

Celestia is annoyed by a fly

We all know that particular fly that will never leave us alone while we're trying to do something. Some of us try and smack or crush it against something to kill it. What do you think the princess of the sun does?

Published 2012-04-08 00:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-08 00:14:02 UTC

Celeritas

Alone in the depths of the royal palace of Canterlot, the princess of the sun quietly went about her reading. It had been a normal day with her usual routine. Get up, raise the sun, and then lounge around the rest of the day while she waited for the time when she needed to lower it again. It was a boring job, but somepony had to do it.

It was the perfect atmosphere for reading. Everything was completely silent except for the occasional sound of hooves clopping across the floor above her. There was nopony constantly asking her what they should do or little meddlesome sister nagging her to do something.

Oh how she cherished these moments alone.

The white alicorn let out a content sigh as she flipped through her book to see how many pages she had left. Forty-six. Not bad considering it was a two thousand page book. Hopefully she would get the chance to finish it before she had to lower the sun. She read on through the adventures of the white mare and the angelic black stallion that kept showing up to save her when a faint buzzing interrupted her fantasy. Celestia turned to look down the hallway as the faint buzzing steadily grew louder. She waited and waited but the culprit never appeared. “Hmph,” snorted the princess before returning to her book.

The buzzing continued through the hallway, slowly ebbing away before returning again even louder. If it weren’t for the constant changing in volume she could have ignored it. Celestia groaned as she tried to focus on her book, beginning to hum in an attempt to drown out the buzzing.

“The red mare chased the figure through the depths of the tunnel… bzzt… The walls were as cold as ice… bzzt… bzzt… It was only a matter of time before… bzzt… before the… bzzt… before the figure would… BZZT… before the figure would find… BZZT… before… BZZT… before the… BZZT… be… BZZT”

Finally the princess had enough, slamming her book against the ground with a thunderous slap that reverberated off the walls. She turned her full attention to the hallway just in time to see a tiny speck float up from the corner and enter the room. A fly. Of course it was a fly, the most annoying things on the planet that never listened to reason and never seemed to do the logical thing. It’s almost as if their sole purpose in life was to annoy. They lived to interrupt everything you ever tried to do.

She watched for several minutes as it circumnavigated the room, bouncing off the ceiling methodically as if it were looking for a way out. At least the buzzing was constant now. Maybe she could just tune it out. “Now where was I?” she reopened the book to the page she had been on and began reading again.

“It was only a matter of time before the figure would find her alone and helpless in the dark. Her bright white coat had to be the worst camouflage in the world. If only… bzzt… she could… bzzt...”

Celestia stopped to glare up at the fly that was still bouncing off the ceiling.

“If only she could… bzzt… If only she could cover herself in something that would hide her. The red mare gazed down at the muddy puddles beneath her hooves. It would have to do.”

Celestia stopped again to glance up at the fly that had now landed upside down on the ceiling. It crawled around for several minutes as the princess waited patiently for it to begin buzzing around again. She knew it would. As soon as she started reading it would start up again. Seconds dragged on to minutes and finally the alicorn gave an annoyed grunt before returning to her book.

“The mud slid across her hide easily, running down her mane in streaks. The feeling of slime gushing through her fur disgusted her beyond belief and she gagged more than once as she applied a thin film to her coat. It was what she needed to do to survive. Nopony ever said it would be easy.”

She paused, looking up at the ceiling expectantly for the fly to begin buzzing again. It wanted to. She could feel it. The anticipation of waiting for it was worse than the actual buzzing. She watched it crawl across the ceiling for another few seconds before once again returning to her story. Maybe it had finally given up.

“The red mare was covered from nose to tail in the grimy substance, every step releasing a mucky squelch. Well she certainly wasn’t very sneaky. The crunch of a rock echoed through the tunnel behind her and she slapped her body against the cold brick wall. She watched as the menacing shadow of the figure grew larger on the opposite wall. It was getting closer. Taking a deep breath, the red mare closed her eyes and tried with every fiber of her being not to cry out as… BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT… as… BZZZZZZZZZZZZT… as the figure let loose a bloodcurdling scream and lunged towards… BZZZZZZZZZZZZT”

“I knew you’d start that again,” the princess scowled up at the fly that was now periodically flying a short distance before landing. She tried to begin reading again but the buzzing interrupted her even before she could begin. “Do you want out, is that it?” Celestia focused her yellow magic around the window across the room and forced it open with a gentle creak. “There you go. Outside. Freedom. You can go fly around and be happy now.” The fly continued to buzz around the ceiling oblivious to the now open window. A gentle breeze rolled about the room, fluttering the pages of her book as she once again tried to read.

“Taking a deep breath, the red mare closed her eyes and tried with every fiber of her being not to cry out as the figure let loose a bloodcurdling scream and lunged towards her. The figure slammed up against her, pinning her to the wall. ‘Quiet my love,’ came the heavy voice of somepony very familiar to her. BZZZZZZZZZT”

“Window is over there,” Celestia glared up at the fly before pointing her hoof at the open window. “Stupid fly.” She muttered to herself looking down at her book again.

“’Oh William! I knew you’d come back for me!’ the red mare cried. ‘And I always will. Now let’s get out of this place.’ The two lovers made their way through the –“

“Ack!” Celestia cried out as a gust of wind suddenly ripped the pages from her grasp. “I’m almost done! Just let me finish this!” She frantically began tearing through the pages to where she was.

“BZZZZZZZZZZZZZT”

“Well it’s obvious you don’t want to go outside anyway,” said the white alicorn closing the window with her magic. “I’ll deal with you later.”

“BZZZZZZZZZT BZZZZZZT BZZZZZZZT BZZT” The fly had managed to make it over to the closed window and was now repeatedly slamming itself against the clear glass.

“Here you go,” she said opening the window again. The fly flew about the open window and continued to slam into the wall and clear glass around it for several minutes. “I hate you.” hissed the alicorn through her teeth. She closed the window again and reopened her book.

“The two lovers made their way through the dark tunnel until they saw the light of the outside world ahead. ‘Oh William! If we leave now they’ll arrest us and we’ll never get to see each other again!’ ‘Don’t worry my dear, I would never let that happen! Nothing could ever separate our love!’ ‘Oh William! We have these moments together, just you and I.’ the red mare grinned devilishly at the stallion.”

“What the…” Celestia shooed away the fly that had landed on her nose. “Well you’re a brave one, I’ll give you that. Not many would land on the nose of the princess of the sun. Very brave or very stupid… Very stupid indeed.”

The fly circled her several times before landing on her back and then her hoof and then her eyebrow. Each time the princess swatted it away it managed to return a few seconds later. “I’m not one to hurt another living creature but you’re not giving me much of a choice,” Celestia growled. The fly continued to land randomly on her until the white alicorn finally lashed out, flailing her hooves around as she tried to swat the flying menace out of the air. Her legs grew tired as she desperately struck out to no avail until eventually collapsing onto the ground and heaving for air. The fly came down and landed delicately on the tip of her horn. “So that’s how you want to play,” Celestia snickered as her horn began to glow a bright yellow. The fly took off again, buzzing around the room as the alicorn tried to grasp it with her magic. She reached out again and again but somehow couldn’t focus her magic in on the fly.

“What matter of demon are you?! Some kind of supernatural fly that’s immune to magic!” Celestia cried out sending bolts of lightning hurdling through the room in every direction. Fragments of the ceiling peeled off and fell to the scorched floor in the aftermath, but the fly was still there - buzzing around as if nothing had happened.

“I WILL END YOU.” the princess of the sun snarled at the speck that was still buzzing around and mindlessly bumping into the ceiling. The earth began to rumble and shake. The mountains shuddered and the ocean began to ripple as Celestia focused all of her magic. The sky grew red with fire as trees suddenly began to burst into flames and all manner of creatures cried out. “Really…” Luna sighed and rolled her eyes as she strolled into the room. The next instant the earth was engulfed in fire and vanished in a puff of smoke within the depths of the sun.