Chapters Spike was having a very bored expression on his face.
"Dude, I don't care if you caught all 721 Pokemon."
"Oh, you're just jealous!"
"No dude, I aint, and besides, Sweeite Belle captured all 721, plus their shiny forms, plus their alternate forms and the alternate form's shiny form!"
Then Button Mash fell to the floor traumatized. Then Spike took Button's cell and called his mom.
"Elaina? Yeah this is Spike, I just broke your son, please pick him-up, we're at the intersection of syrup street & steppin avenue. Oh, you wanna talk to him? Here you go Button."
"Mommy, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"
Spike was un-amused by what he was watching. So he decided to go back home until he bumped into some rock colored being.
"Oh, so...oh no, not you!"
"Hi Spike!" Said a happy diamond dog.
"Ah! I mean ah, hello Rova."
"Isn't it a nice day today?" She asked while wagging her tail.
"Yeah, great?" He replied with a fake smile.
Rova, the sister of Rover moved into Ponyville because she's been able to adapt and handle the sunlight. During her time living in Ponyville, she became best friends with Lyra because she had something close to hands. Yes, she made friends with Winona, because they're both dogs. She also made friends with Rarity even though she's a Diamond Dog's worst nightmare! Also, she fell in love with Spike, because of 3 reasons, he's cute, he's very mature for his age, and they both have interests in gems. She even told him, that if he ever became Greed Spike again, he could add her to his horde! Spike would do all he can to avoid her because he doesn't want to repeat the same incident he had with Winona when he was a dog. So Rova has been brushed off plenty of times but was still persistent to act as Spike's bitch! No, not the kind you abuse, the you know term for female dog. On some bright sides, Spike does wake-up to breakfast in bed, though he doesn't finish because of the finishing course she prepared which includes a cat that a dog may agree with...
The reader doesn't get it.
"You seriously do not know? Oh come-on, this is a sex joke, you gotta know what I'm referring to."
*Shakes head no.*
" Fine, if it makes you feel better, then I'm making a joke about her pussy! There I said it, are you happy?"
*Nods yes!*
(That's what I get for trying to be subtle!) Good, now as I was saying, he is given his own assistant. She wags her tail constantly waiting for a command from him! It's as if she's waiting for him to ask for her love! Oh poor girl and that puppy love though Spike does pet her head & hugs her...but the hugs are rare! Spike didn't mean to be cold to her, he just doesn't have a good history with dogs, seeing how he had to save Rarity from Diamond Dogs, him & Applejack were almost killed by Timberwolves, he got a dog kiss from Winona, was turned into a dog that all of the humans from that world loved, but was then kidnapped by Snips & Snails. So as you can see, it's 2 out of 5 good things during Spike's dog related things in his life! So, it should be stated that he isn't just enemies with rabbits, but dogs as well. So back to more pros, when it's time to go to bed, when Spike would enter his very own bedroom, Rova would be on his bed in a sultry pose, wearing a gown. Spike would be disgusted and tell her to leave, at least that's what he tells her, he in fact makes her leave before she sees or smells his thing coming out, but when her nose activates, she begins scratching at the crystal door! You'd think she'd have those very tough & rough claws to break it down but no, she wanted to be beautiful so she went to Rarity for help, which included, filing those claws. Ow! What in the? What does the note on this rock say........................hey! I am not spouting idiotic bullshit! You better take that back, or I'll return this rock by sticking it to your head! She was as loyal as any other dog, maybe even a bit more. Even though Spike shows his affection, it's mostly because he just wants Rova to leave him alone. So now we're here.
"So, is there anything you want me to do for you today?"
"Well...since you're stronger than me, so you can help me. I intended to get help from Applejack, Big Mac, or Bulk Biceps, but you got the strength to do this as well."
So Spike brought her to some secret area being blocked off by 5 rotting logs & a large boulder. She managed to remove all of the logs and boulder. Then Spike & Rova went in the secret area.
"So Spike, why are we here?"
"Twilight told me to go-onger recon here to see whether or not this place is safe or not."
"Oh, that's interesting and did you just say Go-Onger instead of go-on?"
"Yeah, as in Engine Sentai Go-Onger!"
"Oh yeah, I heard you singing a song like that in your room when I was scratching to get in." Then Rova started walking closer. "Outta curiosity, why do you kick me out? I could easily take care of your..."
"Shut it please!"
"Admit it, you are seduced by my mating display."
"I have no idea what you are talking about."
"Oh come-ooon, you love it when I dress like that!"
"I said shut-up!"
"Fine you baby!"
"Ooooh, like I haven't heard that one before!" Spike sarcastically replied.
So they explored the area for a while until Rova finally asked.
"So, why are we here?"
"Twilight heard some rumors about this specific place being dangerous, because of mysterious disappearances, recently the disappearance of one Bundle Joy."
"Oh I heard about her disappearance, she was last seen with some stallion who was visiting last week, you think her disappearance is somehow connected to this area?"
"Yeah, Twilight thought it was sealed off, but it seems the disappearances are still happening. So she sent me to investigate."
Then the entrance was closed off from behind!
"What?"
Then Spike & Rova began punching at the rock, but no use!
"Drat! We're trapped!"
"What'll we do now Spike?"
"We continue my investigation of course, maybe whoever is behind this will let us out if we kick his ass!"
"O-okay Spike, I'll always follow you."
Author's Note
Bundle Joy is an OC by dolly.
They continued down the cave. Then Spike tripped over something.
"Whoa!"
"Spike, are you okay?"
"Yeah, I just tripped over something."
Spike then conveniently found a torch. Spike lit it so they could see better in the cave. Soon they heard footsteps!
"Rova, get ready."
"Yes master!"
"Don't call me that!"
"Okay, but you're still my master, even if you die, or break my heart & find someone else!"
"(Geez, quit being so loyal, that's Dash's turf. Man, she's actually getting to me!)"
"Aaaaaaaaah!" Screamed a mare in fear.
"Oh, it's Bundle Joy, hey Bundle Joy, we've come to find you!"
"Good, now distract the guy coming this way!' She said while running past.
They turned their heads.
"Hey come back! My master needs to find a perfect mare to sacrifice!"
"Hey you! Stop!" Spike demanded.
"Huh?"
"What in Equestria are you?" Asked Rova.
"He sorta looks like Shogun Deezutra's species, a human." Spike said.
"Oh please, I'm not a human! I am a demon!"
The figure before them was a humanoid figure with claws and talons, black wings, a black shirt, black hair, but no pants! yeah, he his tidy whites were exposed.
"How come you're not wearing any pants?"
"How come you're not wearing a bra bitch?"
"I'm a dog you idiot!"
"Let's just stop! 1st of all, who are you?" Asked Spike
"Fine, I am Xeenam! I've been commanded by someone who wants to bring his beloved back to life. Right now, I'm trying to find a perfect mare to be the vessel for his beloved's soul."
"How horrible!"
"Yeah, he should just give-up & let go of the past!"
"Heheheheheheh, oh you do not understand, I'm actually gonna deceive him as a plan I have that'll be revealed later, now since you 2 got in my way! You're going to die!"
"Bring it o..." Spike was cut-off as a beam of black negative energy was fired right past him & Rova."Scratch that, run Rova!"
So they hustled back to the entrance.
"Wait, what about the blockage?" Rova dropped the ball.
"Oh yeah, that's right!" Then they turned.
"Heheheheheheheheh, good, now you to can hold still while I..."
*Boom!*
"Spike, Rova! We're here to rescue you!"
"Big Mac? How'd you know we were here?"
"I was play...I mean wondering through the forest, don't ask, until I saw Rova remove the debris from the cave. I was gonna talk to you guys, until the cave sealed itself. So I rounded-up Bulk, Rainbow, A.J. and Deezutra."
"Deezutra, we meet again!"
"Xeenam, I thought I struck you down!"
"That was in an alternate version of our world!"
"Rainbow Dash, cover me! Mac & Bulk, take these 2 and get out!"
"Got it!"
So Deezutra & Xeenam fought as hard as they can, almost bringing down the cave! That is until Xeenam used a portal to escape!
"(Heh! Guess I gotta find a pure mare some where else! In some other world. But Deezutra, the next time we meet! It'll be the end of you!)" He thought while moving through space & time to another world.
"He got away!" Rainbow said.
"(Yeah, but I wonder, what is he planning, I'm gonna ask Spike & Rova if they know anything.)"
Author's Note
This part was strictly filler for another upcoming story.
Please Spike, Once for Me?
So they were all out of the cave, and Deezutra asked what Spike & Rova knew about Xeenam's plans.
"Guh, figures. I'll be off, no-one tells the princesses okay?" Deezutra then rushed off back to his home.
"Hey Spike?"
"Yes Rova?"
"In a movie, if a couple escapes death together, they get married."
"Yeah, that's only in the movies, and we're not a couple."
"Spike..."
"Oh come-on, you're seriously resorting to puppy dog eyes?"
"Yes, for just today, will you please go out with me?"
"...Oh geez, fine, after all you have been through, putting up with all I've done to you, & what I've barely done, fine, just for today, one date!"
"Hooray!" Then she started licking him!"
" *Sigh* At least you brushed your teeth, wait, is that the smell of diamonds?"
"Yes, I used the money from my job as your assistant to get me some necessities such as a tooth brush & tooth paste."
"What? Who's paying you?"
"..."
"Twilight?"
"Yep!"
"Figures, we'll go, 7:25 at the park. Put on casual clothes, and not Rarity's version of the word casual okay?"
"Okay my beloved master."
"I'm not your master!"
Then Spike started home.
"Rova, you don't have to follow me."
"Yeah, but Ponyville is this way."
Then Spike slapped his face.
Hours later...Oh-Celestia, I gotta go real bad! Don't worry, my shadow clone will narrate while I'm in the bathroom!
"Hello, I'm the narrator's shadow clone."
Let's go back to where he left off. Hours later, and Spike was all dressed in his casuals. He was knocking on Rova's bedroom door. Hey, she has a job for a royal, so she has to live at the castle.
"(Try to be at least a little happy that she's been so nice to you!) Come-on, how long are you going to keep me..."
Then the door opened abruptly.
"(Wow, Rova actually looks cute in casual clothing, I wonder why she insists on wearing her traditional jacket.) Wow Rova, you actually look cute in casual clothes, for a diamond dog."
"That is the sweetest thing you said to me so far." She explained while petting his head.
"Quit doing that, only pets get pet, and I'm no pet. YOU HEAR THAT? IF YOU'RE SOME BRAND NEW BRONY WHO'S UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT I'M TWILIGHT'S PET, I AM NOT!!! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!"
"Who are you talking to?"
"Don't worry about it, let's just go."
So they walked through the park, Spike against his own thinking, held Rova's paw. Spike was feeling uncomfortable about all of the eyes looking at him, but decided to ignore it because this was Rova's reward. Spike was then given a frisbee by his friend Pip.
"Dude, I'm not gonna play fetch with Rova, she's not my pet."
"Ooh, is that a frisbee? Can we play fetch Spike?"
Spike then pinched the area between his eyebrows.
"Okay, sure, whatever. Here Rova, go long!" Then he threw it.
"Here I goooooooooooooooooooo..." she ran really fast then jumped catching the disc before it hit the ground.
"Yeah! Way to go bitch! Not in an offensive way that is!"
"Thanks Spike, you wanna catch it this time or do you want me to fetch it again?" She asked while drooling with a frisbee in her mouth and also, imagine that dialogue being spoken with her mouthful.
"Don't speak with your mouthful. (That's actually real cute!)"
Soon, the sun began setting. Spike wanted to perfect Rova's reward, but how? Eh, I'm sure he'll figure it out by the time I'm finished eating this giant Ice cream cone...oh-no it's too heavy!
*Crash!*
"Oh-no, I got Rainbow Sherbert all over me!"
"That's it!" Spike blurted out while seeing me on the park bench covered in Ice Cream.
"That's what?"
"Come with me!"
"Wah!" She exclaimed.
"Sir, I want one large ice cream cone for 2!"
"Okay buddy."
"Wait!"
"What?"
"What are you doing?"
"What do you mean?"
"Do you notice that my date is a dog? And, here you are starting off with a chocolate scoop!"
"Oh, sorry Spike, it's the new glasses."
"It's fine, just don't do it again...how'd you know my name was Spike?"
"You're Princess Twilight Sparkle's assistant, there isn't a Twilight Sparkle fan who doesn't know about you, Twilight's surrogate son."
"Thanks for the sorta praise." Then he pulled the ice cream colt in to whisper in his ear. "Also, I want Dog food flavor ice cream."
So Spike and Rova sat next to me, as I just finished wiping all of the spilled ice cream from my body.
"Spike, is this? Dog food flavor?"
"Yeah."
"But you're a dragon."
"Don't you remember the time I turned into a dog?"
"Oh, so you're used to eating dog food?"
"Yep."
So they continued licking opposite sides of the ice cream cone until their tongues touched. Rova pulled him in, and Spike was trying his best to pull away but to no avail. Spike, just accepted her feelings, seeing everyone who was passing by them actually saw them as an ultra unique couple, that could work out. Until about 5 minutes later Rova released.
*Quick panting.* Wow...that was intense....oh-dear, I got slobber all over you."
"It's fine, now it's getting late, let's just head home for now, I'll take a shower to get your slobber off, I'll let you hang out in my room while I'm in the shower."
"(Oh-my, he's really going into just letting me do what I want is he?)"
Spike & Rova made it home, Spike took a shower, Spike exited the shower without warning..."I'm back to narrate!"
*Poof!* As my clone was saying, Spike exited the shower without warning & Rova turned red.
"Oh, sorry Spike, I was just going."
"Wait!"
"Okay."
"Listen Rova...I'm sorry for rarely showing you any affection. The truth is I appreciate what you do for me!" Then he took off his towel. "So that's why I want you to share the bed with me!"
" *Gasp!* You really mean it?"
"Sure."
Then Spike got into bed, what he didn't know was that Rova mistook what Spike meant by sharing the bed. Spike meant it like a master & his dog, not as lovers, unfortunately, I end this story with Spike getting accidentally raped.
"WHY MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!"
Meanwhile...
"Men! Is the robot ready?"
"Yes sir, Spikerulez302-a-tron 100,000 is up and running!"
"Good, now move out! We must hunt down Trahzo & bring him back to the castle!"
"SIR YES SIR!"
To be continued in the 4th Pimp Spike's Swag!