The Get

by Shutdown64

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Human
Length: 34628

After obtaining repeating digits in an imageboard post, our protagonist is whisked away to Equestria where he must endure a new life as a 'Poster', living with a mentor he accidentally chose. Sounds like a fan's dream, but isn't

After obtaining repeating digits in an imageboard post, our protagonist is whisked away to Equestria where he must endure a new life as a 'Poster', living with a mentor he accidentally chose. Sounds like a fan's dream, but isn't what it might seem.

Story originally debuting on /PTFG/, the weird formatting is due to the 1,500 character limit on posts.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-14 19:31:17 UTC

Chapter 2

-The Get Chapter 2-

Celestia guides you through more of Canterlot castle on the journey to your room. It's such a fantastic experience that you're almost disappointed you'll have to wake up at some point. Everything is so perfect within these walls; the regal decor astute, with grand shiny statues and immaculately polished surfaces, both reflecting the rich paintings adorned on most walls. Everything seemed related to Equestria's presumably deep history and lore. The idea of freely viewing the castle is an exciting prospect, and you almost feel like asking for Celestia's permission before...

"Here we are."

Celestia turns around to get a view of you. She notices you stealing a look at a colorful painting featuring several Unicorns seated at a banquet. The unique style of art wasn't what caught your eye, but rather the Earth ponies scattered around the edges of the frame looking at the Unicorns in awe. Was that... normal?

"Ah yes, it's a rather wonderful - if not dated - piece, is it not? It was painted by an old friend." Celestia voices, a hint of sadness in her tone. You presumed that "old friend" probably meant "over-100-years-ago friend". You nod in agreement.

Outside what you assume to be your room are two Royal Guards, each standing ominously against the door. Both are tall stallions only differentiated by their color - black and grey. Their expressions look quite somber as they size you up with a stern look, before slowly bowing to you. Not really knowing what to do in response to this, you look to Celestia for help. She's smiling again.

-

"You are special here, my subject. I want you to know that we gladly welcome you to Equestria. I must now go attend to royal duties, but I'm sure you will find your chamber to be comfortable. If you have any problems, please ask these guards. They have been assigned to you."

Pretty neat. The bowing guards stand tall again as you cross them, hand ready to push the chamber door.

"Will I see you again?" you anxiously ask Celestia's receding back. Turning her head around, she looks at you with her right eye.

"Yes. We shall meet again" she responds, giving a little wink. You feel slightly melancholic at her departure.

When Celestia is finally out of sight, you suppose there's nothing left to do than enter the room - these silent guards are slightly ominous.

Upon entering, you let out a little gasp. The "room" was probably the same size as your entire bungalow. There's a luxurious, royal-colored four-poster bed in the center of the room surrounded by various grooming facilities. There's a insanely large glass window providing a stunning view of both the Castle grounds and Canterlot, meaning you must be at the heart of the central towers Damn it, the urge to go exploring was getting unbearable.

Before any of that though, you decide it's bathroom time. There's a small door in the corner of your room that can only really lead to one place. You head towards it, passing a dresser which has a mirror. You double-take, looking at your reflection.

-

You look atrocious. Pale as paper, huge bags under your eyes, hair in utter disarray. You're surprised Celestia didn't put you out of your misery instead of welcoming you as an important guest. There's a few scratches on your face from your floor-hitting arrival. Definitely seen better days.

After entering the immaculate bathroom and using the various pony-sized facilities, bed is the only destination important to your brain. The sun and moon are slowly switching as you shuffle past the window. Celestia and Luna must be swapping watch. What time was it, you wonder?

Shrugging and awkwardly flinging off the gown, you crawl into the velvet-covered bed as the cold air begins to nip your skin. Snuggling deep under the covers was the best feeling in the world, your rattled mind instantly turning off. Blissful sleep.

Then darkness.

Not again. You whine feebly, but there's no drama this time. The world graciously dissolves back to reveal your bungalow. You blink. You're back in your actual bedroom.

Everything seems as you left it. The PC is still on, wind still howling outside. Everything you've just experienced was a dream, right? Thank fuck.

But wait... you've not gone to bed yet.

Curious now, you gently open your bedroom door hopping into the hallway. The familiar cold air is leaking from below, but it doesn't bother you as it should. You don't know how you know, but there's someone here. In your home. In the bathroom.

"Who's there?" you assert.

A familiar face appears.

-

Not another frickin' Princess.

Before you was none other than Luna. Wings spread out, you could tell she was trying to imitate the grace of her sister. The effect didn't really work.

"Before you is I, Princess Luna. You've heard of us, have you not?" she shouts, using the royal Canterlot voice. You recoil.

"Yes, I know of you, Luna." you stammer, irked by the volume. "Why are you in my bathroom though?"

Awkward pause.

"You will address us as Princess Luna. Regardless," she continues on, looking slightly embarrassed, "We wanted to get a chance to meet you, Poster."

Poster? When will these ponies ask for my real name?

"Well, it's an honor to meet you Princess Luna." you say, not untruthfully. As you head towards her to shake hands or whatever, you reach a horrible conclusion.

"If you're here... that means I'm currently dreaming, right?" Saying it aloud felt foolish.

Luna looks at you, and it's the same sympathy as Celestia had expressed.

"Yes." she finally answers.

Oh. You were afraid of that.

There's another pause.

"How do I stop dreaming, Princess Luna?" you ask weakly.

Luna looked surprised by the question, but maintained her dignity.

"We, as to say I, can help, if it's what you desire. Only this once, however, for I am the Princess of the Night after all."

"Please..." you half-beg. Luna gives you a pitiful smile.

"Then it shall be done. Close your eyes". You comply.

Body going limp, you fall. Last thing you hear are the words "...Sorry."

-

Time passes by, and you are sound asleep. The fresh morning sun begins to heat the room as it creeps through the large window; all the dust in the air is revealed. You stir before waking. You didn't want to go to work today, too many bad dreams. A loud knocking rouses you; must be the mail man.

"Mmmfine, two seconds" you murmur groggily before falling out of bed. The cold floor fully awakens you to your surroundings.

Shit. You're still in Canterlot castle.

Shifting your ass off the floor and hastily whipping on the gown, you rush over to the knocking door. Both guards greet you with a quick bow, before the grey one starts speaking.

"Fine morning, Poster. We've received a request for your presence outside the Castle entrance in a half-hour. We will then escort you to Ponyville where you will meet with your mentor."

"Half-hour?" you repeat, rather taken aback. You were still in a state from your arrival, wanting to test the pony bathtub in the en-suite first.

"If you wouldn't mind" the black guard adds. As if you have a choice now.

"Understood. Hey, listen... If it's not too much hassle, could I get some food?" you ask rather hopefully. Your appetite seemed to have returned and you were famished.

"Not a problem, Sir Poster!" the grey guard repeats, trotting off at once. You close the door as the other guard continues his watch.

Time to blast through your morning wash. You quickly check the mirror before starting.

Was your hair always that thick?

-

Amazingly, you manage to clean up in just 15 minutes. It feels glorious washing away the ills of yesterday. The only problem now being you had no fresh clothes - just the gown. Upon re-wearing it, you notice if feels a bit looser than yesterday. What kind of poor fabric was it made from to stretch so quickly?

Breakfast turned out to be a rather tasty fruit salad, though to your dismay it appeared to be a pony-sized portion. Not really filling you up, it at least gave you enough energy to carry on. Asking for more was probably an option, but you didn't really want to intrude. Hell, you didn't really want to be here at all. Not wanting it didn't seem to be make a bit of difference though. This ride had started, and you were helpless to stop it.

After eating the guards hurried to escort you to the castle front. You felt a bit conscious wearing nothing but a gown and PJs, but no one seemed to pay any thoughts to it - maybe with the exception of your feet. They were protesting about the cold, hard ground obviously made with hooves in mind. It's doubtful you'll be finding some shoes or slippers soon, though.

In the castle grounds you immediately spot Celestia. She's standing next to a golden carriage you recognize as her royal chariot. 6 royal guards are strapped to the front, ready to pull.

"Good morning, Poster" Celestia beams. She's standing tall today with her eyes being level with yours now. She continues.

"I hope your stay was restful."

"Uh yeah, it was. Thanks." you say, going red.

-

After a satisfying rest with time to process yesterday's events, deep shame prickled up your spine at recalling your arrival. Shivering, calling Celestia 'mom' after barfing on her royal floor... You appreciated her kindness and hospitality, but you wanted to get away before more awkward memories were created.

"What's going to happen to me now then?" you ask, "What's all this mentoring talk about?"

"You will be going to a place called Ponyville to meet my student and her friends. I'm sure you're familiar with them." Celestia winks.

You think back to all those imageboard threads, disturbing greentext stories and general fan arts... Yeah, you knew them all right.

"You will be staying at Rarity's, that is to say, the Carousel Boutique. She is expecting you."

"Is she okay with this? I mean, me butting into her life and living with her?"

Celestia forms her answer carefully before speaking.

"She'll... come around to the situation. Rarity is the element of generosity, after all. Besides, you chose her."

Oh dear. Did you just inadvertently ruin Rarity's life? With a shitpost at that? Guess you'll find out soon enough.

It was time to leave Canterlot behind. Celestia helped you onto the royal chariot, before sitting next to you.

Flying wasn't normally a scary prospect to you; you were usually pretty chill with it. Right now though, being jerked through the sky by some magical ponies was a rather new, terrifying experience. Celestia, sensing some discomfort, puts a wing around you.

-

Canterlot Castle's tallest towers fade behind clouds with only the tips of the spires being visible. This chariot ride was surprisingly fast considering what it is.

Time passes by. From the sky the glorious landscapes that form Equestria are absolutely awe-inspiring. Unlike the urban shithole you were used to, this place had absolutely beautiful geography. No cars, factories or power stations, just lush green land with imposing mountains.

The flowing air is refreshingly tasty as you deeply inhale. You catch a hint of Celestia's scent as her protecting wing provides warmth. It's a pleasant, soothing scent. Blood flows to your face; why is this magical horse so damned comforting?

"Ponyville ahead!" one of the Royal Guards yells, thankfully obstructing your mind's dangerous path.

Fuck, that was quick. Anxiety begins to swim through you at the thought of meeting more ponies. Surely it won't be many, right?

Of course.

Upon decent, you see hundreds of ponies crowded round what appeared to be a landing strip for the chariot. The sheer volume of ponies makes it clear the whole of Ponyville is out to greet you. Surely, SURELY they're here for Celestia, not some shitposter? God this can't get more crazy.

The bump of touchdown and removal of Celestia's wing makes you horribly self-aware. A solid wall of pony awaits, all eyes on you. You feverishly scan the crowd feeling slightly sick. There's supposed to be 3 other "Posters" here, right? No other humans seemed present though.

Celestia disembarks, you following in her wake.

-

Avoiding eye contact with the many faces and expression fixated on you, you instead look around Ponyville's scenery. It's exactly like the show with the thatch-roofed houses, tall clock tower, plenty of wooden carts and stalls. On further inspection, there's also crudely-painted banners that read "Welcome Poster!". You sigh.

"Princess Celestia!" a familiar voice calls. Sure enough, it was Purplesmart. Twilight Sparkle.

You turn your attention towards her, while staying perhaps a bit too close to Celestia than was necessary.

Twilight approaches with her alicorn form. Still refusing to accept her as a Princess despite Magical Mystery Cure, you stand your ground.

"Hello Mr. Poster! Welcome to Ponyville on behalf of everypony here! I'm Twilight Sparkle" she says kindly, giving you a smile.

Isn't it the Mayor's job to greet visitors? You digress.

"Hey there, Twilight. My name is-" but you're interrupted by Pinkie Pie, who bounces towards you.

"HEEEEEY WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME!" is bellowed into your ear. Before you can reply, Rainbow Dash swoops in and hushes Pinkie. "Pinkie! Go easy on the new guy," Dash mutters, now facing you. A smug smile forms on her lips as she proudly states:

"Welcome to Ponyville, where you're being greeted by the most awesome Ponyville-ian there is!"

"Don't you live in Cloud somewhere?" you reply, trying to not mimic the same smug face. She didn't like that reply, but before she can retort Celestia speaks.

"Where are the rest of your friends, my student?"

-

Celestia was right; there was no signs of Rarity, Fluttershy or Applejack. Isn't Rarity supposed to play a major part here? Yet, she doesn't even come to see your arrival. You can't help feel a bit down-hearted.

"They were trying to find Applejack last I heard. They should be here soon. In fact... That looks like Rarity and Fluttershy over there." Twilight points. Sure enough, two figures you instantly recognized were coming into view.

You don't really understand Fluttershy's reaction. She usually loves new animals, but looks rather terrified of you. Rarity also seemed to be struggling with her complexion. They approach, Fluttershy going first.

"H-hello..." she squeaks. You know how she is, so you just reply with a smile and nod. Don't want to freak her out.

Rarity next. She trots towards you, with a growing grin. Perhaps growing too much to be considered natural.

"Hello there my dear! You are... the Poster fellow, are you not?" she says through gritted teeth. You blink. Rarity is standing before you: your favorite pony. You can't think of any words that would accurately express how you feel, so you just nod.

Again with awkward pauses.

The silence is broken by Rainbow Dash, who swiftly flies down to Rarity's level.

"So didja find AJ yet, Rarity? Where the hay is she?"

"We... we didn't find her in the end, Rainbow. She's not at Apple Acres or any of her usual spots. Big Mac won't say where she is."

Seemed a bit out of character for AJ, you thought.

-

The rest of the day is spent clumsy greeting crowds of ponies who actually seemed thrilled to meet you. Or Celestia. Honestly you couldn't tell which.

Eventually arriving at Sugar Cube corner, there is a small 'party' prepared by Pinkie that involves tea and eating some cake - to Celestia's delight. It's an fun event, you admit. Sitting there in your dressing gown in a Café stuffed from eating as many sweets as Mr & Mrs Cake could deliver; it certainly made up for the lacking breakfast.

Ponyville's soul was definitely from the community, the excitement being contagious. It was so surreal seeing all these familiar faces, most of them eager to speak. A complete contrast to life in the lonely bungalow.

You hadn't really spoken to the Mane 6 much. AJ was still missing, and it seemed like Fluttershy was hiding. The others seemed to accept you well enough, but their small talk was rather lacking. The exception was Pinkie, whose excitement would make one think this party was for her.

As night draws, the crowds and pleasantries end, and soon enough Celestia is preparing to return to Canterlot. Standing next to the royal chariot, you watch as she climbs aboard. There's that melancholic feeling again.

Celestia clears her throat.

"Rarity, I'd like you to mentor our Poster friend here on whatever they may require. In return I want you, Poster, to aid Rarity on whatever she requires. May you form strong bonds"

God, this sounds like marriage.

-

Celestia departs, and you feel a small part of you wanting to go with her. She was never high up your pony tier-list, but this past day had certainly changed that. Now you're stuck feeling awkward.

Rarity, Twilight and Pinkie remain, with the other ponies having already departed. Upon arriving at the Carousel Boutique Twilight speaks to you.

"Well Mr. Poster, I hope you've had a great first day here in Ponyville! I currently live in the Library" she points to a giant tree in the distance "I live there with my assistant Spike. Come by sometime, we can discuss books!"

"Sure, I'll pop by" you idly reply. Books were never your thing, really.

Twilight leaves, and after Pinkie says her garbled goodbyes and prances off, it's just you and Rarity.

You could cut this tension with a knife.

"So... shall we go in?" you suggest, bare feet now killing you.

Rarity gives you a rather disapproving look before taking the lead with a "Hmph". You follow her, heart sinking.

On entry a bell tinkles and an array of purple and pink affronts your eyes. Just like the show, there are pony-mannequins situated around the workshop each with unique and fantastic designs. Like in Canterlot, the urge to explore is rising, before...

"Why did choose this, Poster?" Rarity asks bluntly, her back to you.

"...Excuse me?" you reply, trying to sound polite. Anxiety rises inside.

Rarity turns to face you, and it shocks you to see tears sitting in her eyes.

"Why did you choose this!?"

-

Fuck. This was the last thing you wanted. Celestia said Rarity would come round to the situation, but you weren't aware that meant she hasn't even accepted it.

You stand there, looking at her. This reject from your favorite pony was something you hadn't anticipated.

"I choose you because you're my favorite pony?" you say weakly. Rarity suddenly lets out a rather manic laugh.

"Oh ho HO, I see! So since I'm YOUR favorite that means I get the pleasure to BABYSIT you instead of worrying about my own life. Like it's not trouble enough that I need to look after dear Sweetie Belle from time to time!" she snorts. There's no more tears, just resentful bitterness.

You feel a rush of anger at her words.

"Hey, I didn't ask for this either! Do you have any idea how I feel? I've been separated fro-"

"BAH! You only have yourself to blame! You Posters have no idea what your actions do!"

"Now wait a damn minute! If you knew MY side of th-"

"YOUR side? You don't seem to understand the scope here. You have no responsibilities anymore, but instead mines have doubled. Do you know this this makes me feel? Putting on fake smiles for the Princess!?"

Agh, what's the best way to approach this? Most of your arguments were online to faceless people. When put on this spot like this, it was much harder to create comebacks. Instead of replying, you attempt to cork your anger and try being the voice of reason.

"Look. I'm -sorry- this inconveniences you. Just show me where I sleep and I'll be out of the way."

-

Not bothering to reply, Rarity sticks her head up with another "Hmph". She begins trotting upstairs, you follow.

You are led, in silence, to a relatively small room - at least when compared to the Canterlot one. It's practically bare with only a small window, wall-attached mirror, a broken horse-mannequin, some bits of excess fabric and what looked like a futon. Very much lacking in comforts.

"This was my glorious extra storage room before I had to change EVERYTHING." Rarity fires up. You don't rise to the bait.  Instead...

"Aren't you supposed to be the element of Generosity? Can I at least get a pillow?"

For some reason, the anger that flashed across Rarity's face felt massively satisfying. She briskly trots off, only to return and launch a pillow at your face.

"THERE! Now get acquainted to my storage room! I suppose now I need to research what kind of disgusting meals I'll have to cook up for you!"

Pulling the pillow from off your face and holding on to it, you boldly ask if you can look around the Boutique. The piercing look returned in response explained it all.

"You stay here. You do not leave this room unless I require it or nature calls. Bathroom is across the way."

Rarity leaves, closing the door rather harshly. This is the first time you've been alone for a while.

Lying on the futon, the thought "So wait... I now have to share my ex-favorite pony's toilet?" drifts across your mind.

Things just kept getting weirder.

-

Chapter 3

-The Get Chapter 3-

In silence, you try to make the most of what you have. The futon has been dragged into a corner under the window and you start making a 'nest' with fabric scraps. Looking around, the storage room is roughly the same size as your old bedroom, though feeling larger due to the lack of furnishings. The mirror on the wall opposite the futon has a golden frame, easily recognized as the same style as the rest of the mirrors scattered around the Carousel Boutique. Taking a look, you're reminded that the dressing gown and PJs are now the only clothes in your possession. At least living with Rarity might pay off in that regard.

After an hour or so of lying on the futon reminiscing, boredom begins to bite. With no indication of time except the slowly dying sun, you decide to leave the room. Screw Rarity's orders.

Slowly pushing the door open, you inspect the hallway. To your right, a big door. That must be Rarity's bedroom. In front of you is presumably the bathroom door, with the left leading down the stairs. Upstairs must be the living quarters, downstairs being dedicated to shop floor and creation.

Sneaking down the stairs, you hear the clicking of a sewing machine, accompanied with some low-tone mutterings from Rarity.

"Oh but Rarity! You've been chosen, isn't that great! I wish it was me!" she says, in a sarcastic mock of - you assumed - Twilight.

"Oh yes it's just so fantastic! A stranger in my home and business-" she suddenly turns round.

Your eyes meet.

-

Rarity lets out a soft scream which roots you to the spot.

"And just WHAT are you doing?" she demands, turning her sewing machine off and getting into an aggressive stance.

"I just wanted to look around, being kept prisoner is sorta boring".

You had chosen the wrong words.

"P-prisoner!? PRISONER? You think YOU'RE the prisoner here?"

Was she always this melodramatic? Yes, actually, she was.

"Look," you say, hastily trying to find a new subject, "Thanks for this dressing gown."

She pauses, before giving another "Hmph".

"I didn't make it for you, I made it for the first Poster who lived with AJ. I just recycled the clothes pattern. It's so out of date now that frankly it suits someone as barbaric as you."

Oh right, so Celestia was feeding you twisted words before? With a mouth full of spite, you retort

"I see. That explains the cheap stretching fabric then."

This statement apparently confuses Rarity.

"Cheap, stretching fabric? But that's made from Equestria's finest cotton! It's practically impossible to stretch."

Yeah, nah, this gown was getting looser by the hour.

"Whatever you say, Ms. Perfect. Listen, I have a... request" you say, with extreme softness on the last word as Rarity seems to be stewing in anger.

"Would it be possible to make me some... proper clothes? I can't wear this gown forever."

Surprisingly, her pupils expand in what can only be excitement.

"You mean design you some clothes? I... I suppose that's reasonable."

-

Before you know it, Rarity is attacking you with measuring tape, taking notes for the lengths of your arms, waist and legs. In spite of herself, she does seem quite enthusiastic.

"So can you make clothes for humans? Just like that?" you say, rather taken aback.

Rarity gives you a rather impatient look. "Of course. It's all in the measurements. I love a challenge, even for something as foul as you."

Before you can make a comeback, she magically unties the gown and places the cold tape measure on your chest. You shudder.

"I can easily design and make a pattern, but you're going to be the one to make it. I might as well put you to SOME use with those long... things on your hooves"

"What, you mean these?" you say, wiggling your fingers. Rarity's the one who shudders now.

"Enough of that! I need to draw up some designs. I suppose you can LOOK around, but do not TOUCH." her emphasis being pretty clear.

Rarity toddles off into another room, and you begin to scope out the ground floor. Your exploring shows there's a kitchen area, shop floor, fashion stage and various work rooms. In all honesty, it's nothing mind-blowing. Your tender feet begin to hurt, and before you decide to head back upstairs something pink catches your eye. Fluffy slippers.

Shiftily, you check for Rarity. No sign of her.

You sneak the slippers on to your feet. This comfort is nothing short of unfiltered euphoria. They fit surprising well, hugging your feet perfectly. Yoink.

-

After heading back upstairs, the bathroom door is ajar. Might as well view the one place you were "officially" allowed access.

As expected, it was nothing short of perfection. Spotless, there's various perfume bottles and makeup accessories neatly placed. There's a bathtub and toilet similar to those at Canterlot castle, with accompanying shower. Miles ahead of your place on Earth.

Sitting on the edge of the bath, you begin to wash your raw feet in an attempt to soothe them. Walking over dirt, stones and grass all day wasn't the best thing for them. The amount of muck that comes off is pretty revolting, and after drying them off, you hear a grumpy calling from behind.

"Y-you!" Rarity stammers, apparently not brave enough to open the door.

"What's up? I'm busy trying on your perfume at the moment" you reply sarcastically.

"You WHAT?" she screeches before slamming the door open. You laugh as a blundering Rarity tries to attack you with magic, using a forehoof to cover her eyes.

After a few seconds, the obvious lack of perfume in the air makes her stop.

"How DARE you!" she accuses.

"How dare I what?" you sneer. Rarity baiting was your new favorite hobby.

She removes the hoof from her face before looking at you. Just as her rage is building again, she spots the pink slippers you've got on. Her jaw drops.

"Are- are those...?" she stammers. You nod. "Yeah, mind if I borro-"

Before you know it, you're being dragged via magic into the storage room.

-

After receiving a huge telling-off for touching Rarity's possessions and being made to swear not to do it again, you decide to stay in your miserable room. At least the pink slippers belonged to you now because "they were ruined".

The view from your window was nothing compared to Canterlot's, but it was still fascinating. In the distance the Everfree forest stood dark and eerie; the streets below filled with ponies coming and going as the sun sank lower coloring the sky a deep red. It starts to remind you of Celestia, your heart giving a little pang thinking about her.

Before you can investigate that feeling, there's an abrupt thumping at your door. Reluctant, you stand up and open it. It's Rarity again.

Wordlessly, she thrusts a plate into your stomach with magic before closing the door again. Blinking, you look down to see a sandwich. Do these ponies ever eat protein? Regardless, hunger makes you take a hesitant bite. Eating before checking it was a bad idea.

You gag, spitting sandwich everywhere before ripping the top slice of bread off. What the fuck, are those weeds? Did she actually expect you to eat a dandelion sandwich? Ugh.

Tipping the weeds onto the floor, you settle for the pitiful bread. At least she tried, you suppose.

It's dark when you finally give up thinking about hunger and how your life was ruined, and start to think about sleep. Already lying in your futon, you attempt to snuggle into a comfortable position with a sigh.

-

The night passes uneventfully. No dreams, no disturbances.

With morning blooming through the small window, you are slowly awoken. It takes a minute for your brain to process where you are. Feh. Why bother getting up if there's nothing to do? It's not like anyone would care, and you won't get in trouble for it. Though now that you think about it, a bathroom visit wouldn't be so bad.

Sitting up, you suddenly yelp in pain. Sleeping on the floor seems to have done a number on your muscles which are painfully burning and cramping all over like you've done a serious workout. The gown you were using as an extra blanket slips to the floor as you awkwardly rise.

Stiffly and painfully, you waddle out the storage room and across the hall and into the bathroom. A long soak in the bath is what you need. As you turn the taps causing the clear water to flood the basin, you look around for soap. Do ponies use soap? Seems like one of those things you might need to ask permission for. Reluctantly, you go to ask Rarity.

You poke your head out the bathroom door just in time to see Rarity appear from downstairs. Her sleeping mask is covering her horn and she's wrapped in a elegant royal purple dressing gown. The upturned nose that greets you was becoming a normal occurrence.

"Morning... D-do I have your permission to use soap?" you say rather pathetically.

It's obvious she wasn't too happy about it, but she didn't argue. A good enough answer for you.

-

The bubbling, steaming bath is filled, and not a moment too soon as your limbs ache badly. Locking the door to prevent any unwanted ponies, you strip and quickly glance in a mirror.

Yeesh, all this weak pony food was taking it's toll. Your gut was looking a bit skinnier since you last checked. Hair was, if possible, even messier than it was after your Canterlot arrival. Maybe that explained Rarity's upturned nose?

Slipping into the hot scented water was absolute bliss. Back home you never had time for baths, instead making do with the shitty pressure from the shower. As your joints and muscles relaxed, you sank deeper into the aromatic water. It was such a sensual experience that you forgot all your worries.

After almost an hour of pure relaxation though, your moment was gone. Rarity was banging at the door.

"Honestly! You're not the only one who needs to use the bathroom you know!"

Frustrated, you surface. With aches now all gone, you respond with "All right, keep your hair on". You awkwardly dry and step out the bathroom, towel draped over your body. Rarity averts her eyes and gracefully trots in.

Returning to your room, you're surprised by a small pile of what appear to be clothes. Did... Rarity make these for you?

You eagerly throw them on. While not clothes you'd usually wear, they were certainly suitable. Fancy trousers and some weird sweater. She's even made socks and underwear. Maybe she does care after all?

-

You head downstairs, thinking about breakfast. You need something with protein, not more crappy cupcakes or sandwiches. You open the fridge to discover some eggs. Perfect.

Rarity eventually descends the stairs while you're cooking an omelette. One look at her blood-shot eyes tells you she's about to lose her shit at you for using the stove, but she seems to hold it in.

"Hey, thanks for these clothes. I thought you said I had to make them myself?" you say, teasing slightly.

"Yes, well, I just got too... caught up in the process." she awkwardly replies.

Next thing you know, she's behind you. Horn glowing menacingly, she leers at you.

"What-" but before you even form the question, she's using magic on your hair.

"You can't go around with hair like that! Let me fix it." A comb appears out of nowhere, starting to attack your head.

"Nah seriously it- Ouch!" you whine, as Rarity pulls out some knots. Knots? How long was your hair?

"You really should get this styled you know, it's an utter mess and I won't have it!"

Struggling, you grab the brush and throw it down. "Just... leave it" you say grumpily.

That doesn't really go down well, but you don't care. She'd already ruined your dreamy bath.

Munching on the omelette, you watch a sulky Rarity feed her cat Opalescence.

"So what's the plans for today?" you ask, trying to strike up some conversation.

"I'm going to make you useful and show you how to use a sewing machine. I don't want you in sight of customers."

Fair enough.

-

Shuffling along in your pink slippers, Rarity takes you into one of her workshops. There's mountains of fabric and sewing equipment all rather eerily surrounded by pony mannequins. With test fabric already loaded under a sewing machine's needle, you sit on a tiny uncomfortable stool.

Rarity somewhat patronizingly explains the basics, and after loading the thread spool, you begin. It seems easy enough, and you manage to stitch a neat line. Next, you try to stitch a curve. Simple.

In your haste to show off how easy it was to you, a finger slips and slightly touches the needle. There's no damage, but your heart just about explodes.

"Fuckin' hell!" you shout aloud, jerking your hand back.

At your words, Rarity's ears flop and she looks utterly flabbergasted. Before you react, she pulls the stool from underneath you with magic making you crash on to the ground.

"Hey, what-" you begin, but your voice dies as Rarity stands over you unleashing a tirade.

"You DO NOT use that FOUL language under this roof. Do you understand? DO YOU UNDERSTAND!?"

"Alright! Fine!" you shout, pretty pissed at getting chewed out by Rarity again. It was like your independence was totally gone now, living with your parents again .

"Promise me you'll never use such filthy language again" she continues, pressing her face up against yours, horn sparking threateningly.

"I promise! Whatever helps you sleep at night."

She withdraws, and you rub your ass from where it met the ground.

-

After that drama, the afternoon went by quickly. Rarity dealt with customers as you practiced in back with the sewing machine. Bar almost sewing your finger, it was a rather uneventful day. Sewing was a rather boring task, you decided. You'd rather be doing anything else, but if it made Rarity shut up...

Evening falls, and finally the Carousel Boutique closes for the day. Rarity checks on your sewing, and seems to be mildly impressed. You didn't want her praise, you just wanted to do something else. Standing up, your back painfully ached and your legs were going numb. You resort to waddling again.

Dinner is a rather pitiful affair. You mentioned to Rarity you won't be eating anymore of her grass-filled sandwiches, so instead you have to make do with fruit. No wonder you were so damn skinny, living here was like extreme dieting.

Night falls, and like the night before, you're lying miserable and hungry in your futon. Loneliness is starting to become an issue too. Sure, you didn't have many friends before, but that's why you enjoyed shitposting to Anonymous people. God, you missed the internet so much. Shivering, you try to get some sleep.

Next thing you know, you're in the Everfree forest trying to escape Ponyville, climbing over branches and logs. It's dark, and you regret leaving the town now. Nervously, you start to sprint. Then run. You trip.

Something approaches. It's big and humanoid shaped. As it steps under the moon, you see it's face.

You yell.

-

The mutant creature begins to swipe at you with hooves, leaving you rolling in the dirt. You frantically crawl away, only to be captured by magic. Helpless now, you're dragged up to a leering face that you instantly recognize. Before you get a chance to confront it though, the magic force begins to squeeze the air out of your chest, twisting and crushing your body, and just before breaking point...

...Banging brings you back to the world again. It sounds like your door is being beaten alive.

You slowly sit upright, before putting your head in your hands.

"Stop it." you moan into the darkness.

"What were you yelling about?" came the sound of Rarity, sounding more concerned than annoyed.

"Just... go back to bed. I'm fine" you lie.

"Are you serious? After waking me up-" she begins to argue, but you get short-tempered

"Just go. Please."

The familiar "Hmph" resonates from behind the door, before the trotting fades away and you hear a slam.

Sitting in the darkness, you're terrified at what the dream contained.

Dwelling on it for hours, sleep just doesn't come. Nodding off only results in what feels like 5 minutes of blackness before it's apparently morning.

You feel shit. Tired and groggy from a poor night. Going through the morning routine, you barely speak to Rarity despite her questions about the nightmare. She's the last person you want sympathy from.

That half-pony half-human monster in the dream... it had your face. What the hell did that mean?

-

Another meaningless day follows. Pitiful breakfast. Dull sewing practice. Your body aches from sleeping in the futon. You feel miserable about not going outside. You want to, but that dream haunts you. Fuck your life right now. Your clothes are getting looser by the day, probably due to the starving you're putting up with.

Over the next two days, you were getting trapped in a routine of sewing, arguing and sleep. Your mood has improved somewhat at learning Opalescence likes being around someone with fingers. She wasn't too happy today though, as your sore fingers couldn't scratch her properly. Endless sewing practice was likely to blame.

After spending breakfast in silence avoiding Rarity, you head into the back room to continue being a sewing slave. The Carousel Boutique was closed today, but it just meant Rarity would be there to provide "support".

Sitting down on the tiny stool, you knew the routine now. You'd been stitching up some minor things, like your socks. Rarity held true to the "making your own clothes" talk.

Today you were making curtains for your room, a simple but useful tutorial. Folding and cutting the fabric took time as Rarity had to approve every design because it was still "her house".

The sewing begins. You start with the hem of the curtain. Your fingers stiff, you accidentally stitch the top of your loose sleeve to the curtain.

Shit.

"Oh COME on!" Rarity sighs at you.

Before you realize what's happened, you burst into tears.

-

This shocks you as much as it apparently shocks Rarity.

What the hell? You've not cried since you were a little kid. What kind of pussy are you? And yet... You can't stop.  Tears are now hopelessly rolling down your face onto the curtain.

Rarity looks absolutely lost, not expecting this kind of behavior from you at all. Her ears begin to droop and she looks at you with sad widening eyes.

"P-please don't cry!" she begins to plea, sounding like she was about to start crying. Using magic, she unravels the stitches holding your sleeve prisoner.

You raise your now-free arm and rub your eyes. The tears kept coming harder, and in all honesty you had no idea why you were crying. It wasn't logical.

Trying to not speak through sobs, you place your head in your hands, elbows on the sewing table. Your heaving chest makes you cry louder. Was this the result of lack of sleep? Lack of food? Loneliness? You felt utterly helpless there, bawling into your hands yet not knowing why.

Next thing you know, Rarity is hugging you. You freeze, sharing the moment by slowly hugging her back.

What the fuck was happening here? You hated her like 5 minutes ago.

A few minutes pass, and you finally break apart. Rarity passes you a handkerchief to clean your face up.

"S-sorry..." you finally mumble. "I... I don't know what came over me."

"That's quite alright, dear." she replies. You take note that this is the 2nd time she's called you dear, probably the first time by will.

-

You spend the rest of the evening with Rarity fussing over you. She makes you hot chocolate, semi-forcing you to divulge all worries. You list them off. Weight Loss; Pains and aches; Clothes barely fitting; Bad dreams; Loneliness; Homesick; Bad attitude from a certain pony.

Once it's all off your chest, you do feel a lot better. Rarity seems to actually be paying attention now, too.

"Listen," she says awkwardly, "you need to understand how this has been tough on both of us. You didn't want to come here, and I didn't really want to share my house with a stranger. What's done is done though. As for the weight loss and dreams... perhaps Twilight might be able to help. I don't really know what a Poster eats, I've been too busy with work to research properly" she tails off, looking guilty.

"I'm sorry" you reply woefully, looking down at your mug. Sadness threatens to engulf you again. Why do you feel so emotional today?

"Oh not at all dear, the damage is done now" Rarity says hastily. "First thing tomorrow, we'll pay the library a visit and research Posters in Equestria. How does that sound?"

You nod, sitting in silence. It's getting dark, and just as you think about heading, Rarity speaks up.

"You know, I was... afraid of getting to know you. AJ has been though this whole mentoring thing before, but has never spoken about it."

You blink. "What happened to her Poster? If I recall, they were the first to visit Equestria."

"No one knows except AJ" Rarity shrugs.

-

After a cheerful "Good night", you return to your storage room. Emotionally drained for reasons you didn't understand, you crawl into the futon. It's a shame you didn't finish the curtain you think to yourself, but as sleep closes in on your mind, you smile that at least you seemed to have repaired bridges with Rarity.

A new morning comes around, your 5th day in Equestria. As soon as you hear the rooster call, you bound out of the futon. You've slept brilliantly, ready to take on the day. Entering the bathroom to start your morning routine, you double-take when you see the mirror. Sure, losing weight wasn't anything new, but there now appeared to be highlights in your hair? The fuck? Was this Rarity's idea of a joke?

You ask her at the breakfast table, but it's news to her too. Apparently she thinks it looks terrible and begs to style you hair. You swiftly tell her no.

Scarfing down another bowl of fruit, you begin nagging Rarity to hurry up. This excitement at going to the library was uncalled for, but you couldn't help it. You were going to leave this Boutique! Go outside! See new ponies! Maybe even get answers?

10 minutes later, you're making your way through Ponyville with Rarity. Ponies are still gawking at you, but you don't care over how wonderful it is to be outside again. With the Pink slippers equipped, walking is enjoyable.

Arriving at the library, Rarity politely knocks the door, which is opened seconds later by Spike.

"Rarity! Oh, and new guy."

-

Spike swings the library door open, warmly greeting Rarity with a small bow. You get a rather dirty look. He's obviously not wild about you living with Rarity.

Twilight is on top of a large pile of books, looking like she's busy packing things up. As soon as she spots Rarity trotting towards her though, she flaps down graciously meeting you both.

"Hey Rarity! Hey Mr. Poster!" she calls, standing before you both. She's looking bigger now you see her up close, do alicorns grow faster or something? Before thinking about it in much detail, Rarity explains the situation. After getting over the awkwardness of having your worries put out in the open, Twilight adamantly agrees to help.

"I can understand how you feel Mr. Poster. When I first moved here from Canterlot, I felt the exact same way. That was until I met my best friends, anyway!" she beams. You try not to gag, having no interest in friendship lessons at this moment in time. Answers only.

Together, you spend most of the afternoon poring over books. Even Rainbow Dash joins in, after visiting to read some Daring Do. There are so many books that it was difficult knowing where to begin. Encyclopedia of Equestrian biology? Mysterious Events of the Last Century? Mythic beasts of Frozen North?

You settle for a rather disturbing book about Equestria's surprisingly dark history, hoping to find signs of humans.

Suddenly Twilight lets out a small gasp. All eyes on her, everyone sits round as she addresses you.

-

"Mr. Poster, I think I know what's going on" she says, rather hesitantly.

"Well, don't leave me hanging."

"If I understand, your home, that is to say, Earth, is for carbon-based life?"

"Uhh... I believe so?" Science was never really your strong subject.

"That means you're a carbon-based life form, correct? The problem with that is the land of Equestria isn't carbon-based, but instead magic-based."

You don't really understand where this is going, and it must show on your face as Twilight continues.

"Think of it this way. You're a carbon-based life form in a magic-based land. You don't belong here."

"Well that much is obvious" you sneer rather harshly. Twilight ignores the tone and continues.

"This might sound a bit silly, but it explains your symptoms. I think our world - that is to say, Equestria - is... digesting you."

There's a silence.

"D-digesting him, Twilight?" Dash speaks up, voicing your response for you.

"Yes, digesting him. Mr. Poster is being broken down by our world. It's trying to make him into something that can logically exist here. It's... transforming him."

Transforming?

Shit. It makes sense. Your clothes weren't stretching, you were shrinking. Celestia wasn't standing tall that time, you were shorter. Your hair wasn't messy, it was growing. Were those aches related?

"...And the emotions?" you voice up feebly.

Twilight looks at you with sad eyes.

"...That's likely because you're transforming into a female."

Chapter 5

The Get Chapter 5 -

"Sam?" you repeat. It's not a name you recall from anyone you've met in Equestria so far. In fact, it doesn't even ring a bell when you think about the show. In that case, there's only really one answer to who this person is.

"Is Sam... another Poster?" you tentatively ask.

Big Mac looks at you, his expression unreadable with its usual frown and heavy-lidded eyes. He eventually decides to give you an answer.

"Eyup."

Silence falls.

"And?" you eventually push.

Big Mac blinks. "Sam came here to live with us at Apple Acres. He arrived in Equestria a year or so ago, being the first of your kind here."

Huh. So you really weren't the only person to suffer this insanity. You gain comfort from knowing you're not alone anymore. Thinking back to the stained-glassed window in Canterlot castle... Applejack was the 5 mil Get, wasn't she?

"So is Sam still here at Apple Acres?" you question, wondering if you'd get the chance to meet him.

"Nope."

Silence falls again. Frustrated with this rather unhelpful answer, you start to press. "Where is he now, then?"

Big Mac pauses again. Does it really take this long for his brain to process?

"Not here. That's all you need to know. Please don't mention him to my sister, it'd only upset her" he replies in a rather somber tone. Out of respect for the guy, you agree.

In all honesty, you forgot about the other Posters. You take a mental note to check up on their existences later.

-

Before you can probe further, AJ returns with a saddle bag. As she starts unloading various first aid supplies, you wonder how she was planning on applying bandages without magic?

"Right, time to untie ya'll. If ya attempt to make a break for it, then we won't bother fixin' up yer wounds" AJ warns.

With no fight left in you, you agree. After some knot-biting, the rope comes off allowing you to rub your chaffed wrists. AJ then proceeds to push the first aid supplies to you.

"So I'm doing this myself?" Not that you minded, but still.

"Your mess, your problem." AJ says simply. "You need to learn from your mistakes."

Rather bitter at those words, you begin attending to your bite. Moving makes you realize how sticky and dirty you are, covered in drool and mud. In a moment of inspiration, you ask if you can get a wet towel. AJ agrees, leaving you and Big Mac alone again. Now's your chance.

"What was Sam like, then?" You were burning for more info.

Big Mac blinks.

"He was a good guy." he finally says. "Took him a while to adjust, but he got there. AJ liked him a lot, treated him as a younger brother."

"Liked?"

Silence. Dammit.

You'll get this information later. Pain was slowly obscuring your brain, so priority now was to treat the worse of these scratches and cuts. As you start poking the bite, AJ returns with a wet towel. She launches it across the barn onto your head, where it lands with a flap. Cold water hugs your face, and it actually feels kinda nice.

-

Spending about 30 minutes getting cleaned up, your bitten arm and blistered feet are now lightly bandaged. With AJ and Big Mac watching you the whole time, you can't help feel a bit awkward. Sitting down with legs stretched out your feet look slightly lonely with only one mud-stained slipper. The other slipper is now presumably Timberwolf dinner which saddens you.

Just as the silent awkwardness reaches critical level a blue streak fills the air before rolling and landing gracefully in the barn. It's Rainbow Dash.

"Have you guy's seen that weirdo guy yet? Rarity's fre- oh." she tails off, seeing you sitting there.

"Hi" you reply, deliberately trying to make it as crushingly awkward as you could for her after being addressed as "weirdo guy".

Dash looks a bit confused at seeing you there, before launching into the air again. "Does Rarity know?"

"Nope, we thought we'd make sure he was alive first before raising the alarm." AJ states, her tone expressing how much of a nuisance you were.

"He does look pretty beat up. Where'd ya find him?" Dash inquires.

"Oh just in the Everfree forest" says a now-standing AJ, moving towards you. Dash does a weird flip in the air before practically shouting "IN THE FOREST?!". An "Eyup" comes from Big Mac.

Dash looks astounded, quickly stammering something about telling Rarity before she zooms off. Ignoring this interruption, Big Mac mentions something about getting back to work and also leaves. You and AJ are now alone.

-

"Uhm... thanks for your help..." Face beginning to burn, you were tired of being embarrassed all the time. Looking AJ straight in the eyes, you see a small smile creep across her face.

"And darn tootin'. Though I couldn't exactly leave somepony in danger. Can ya'll stand?" she asks, looking at your feet.

Muscles massively lethargic and strained from all the running earlier, you shakily rise off the ground. Winching, you kick off the ruined slipper. Except for the thin bandages, you're back to being barefoot.

AJ's smile turns to a small frown, giving you a sorry look. "Do your hooves hurt that bad?"

Trying to understand what she meant, you eventually nod. "Yeah, my feet hurt. They're too soft and squishy."

Not taking her eyes off you, AJ repeats your words.

"Feet... Foots. That's right, I remember now."

"Remember what?" you press. Might be your chance to wheedle more Sam information, though you remember agreeing with Big Mac not to mention it...

"C-can ya'll stay there for a minute? I want to give you something. Give me a moment."

She briskly trots off, leaving you standing awkwardly alone in the barn. Did you just upset her? Fuck. It was only about mid-noon, but you'd already fucked up so many things. This day had already overstayed its welcome. You long for your Futon, the only true sanctum in this world.

Walking rather cautiously over to the exit, your feet sting on contact with the lumpy ground, hay getting caught up in the bandages. Urgh.

-

When you finally reach the door, the cool air brushes your still-damp face. Apple Acres is a really lovely area with apple trees as far as the eye can see. It feels so peaceful here. Despite all that's happened, you grin. Bar today, the most you've seen of outside was from the Carousel Boutique window. Yet now, it as all out in front of you. You even got some decent exercise.

Taking a few minutes to hearty inhale the air, a soft "Ahem" from behind makes you jump. Applejack had returned.

"Here" she says, dropping something in front of you. You look down, allowing a small excited squeal to escape.

"For me? Really?" Oh man, you thought Rarity was supposed to be element of Generosity.

"Eyup!" she says, sounding like her big brother.

Kneeling down, you look at what AJ delivered. A fine, sturdy pair of brown leather cowboy boots. The best bit being that they were seemingly designed to fit human feet. That's odd...

"So... You have people shoes? For people like me?" Burning curiosity returns in full force.

AJ's ears slightly flop and she looks away. You realize that you've put her on the spot.

"Uh, yeah... These boots are for hoomans. They belonged to a friend, but they don't need 'em anymore."

A low tone in her voice tells you not to press the matter. You don't. Instead, you boop her on the nose. Caught by surprise, her eyes expand to a rather alarming size, before she lets out a giggle.

"Whut?" she laughs.

"Really, thanks. I'll take care of these."

-

The leather boots fit pretty well. Sure, they are a bit bigger than your current foot size, but they're still comfy and easy to wear. Having some proper, sturdy footwear was a damn novelty too as you do a little ecstatic jump. With your knees popping on landing though you instantly regret it.

Being out in the sweet air and roasting sun of Apple Acres quickly draws attention to your crusty lips. Now that you think about thirst, your tongue feels as if you've been licking carpet for hours.

"Hey AJ, uhm, do you have any drinks here? Like water or something. I'm pretty parched."

Giving a rather loud fake tut tut, AJ raises an eyebrow.

"So you distract us from work, take our first aid supplies, I give you free attire out of kindness and now ya'll want fed?!"

Her tone was jokey and accompanied by a smile, but it did make you feel rather rude asking.

"If you wouldn't mind..."

God damn these ponies make you feel completely incompetent, like some kind of needy child.

Rolling her eyes in jest, AJ heads round the back. You follow her, feeling suave as fuck with your new boots.

"I need some way to repay you guys for your hospitality..." you begin saying.

"It's fine. Ah'm sorry I was a bit rough with you before, but I don't like what ya put Rarity through."

"Right... so there has to be some way I can make it up to all you guys, right?" you say, sounding slightly desperate.

"Well..." AJ ponders. "I suppose ya'll could help out around the farm someday?"

-

Doing something other than sewing? You feel such a rush even at the idea of menial labor.

"Apple bucking? Helping out you and Big Mac?" you jabber, thrilled at an excuse to go outside.

"Yup, bits n' bobs. Mind, you'd be working for free - no pay. There's apple pie and juice in it though, if you're good."

"You bet! Any excuse to go out and stretch my legs. I feel like I'm going mad cooped up in that shop..."

"I can imagine, silly dresses and 'frou-frou' nonsense. Take a seat on that there barrel, I'll be back in a lickity-splick."

"A what?" you call behind her but she'd already gone inside.

Pulling yourself onto the barrel, your mind keeps creeping towards 2 things: Rarity and Sam. The first because of how bad you were feeling right now; the latter because where the hell was he if not here? What was his story?

Your train of thought turns back to Posters. You remember the imageboard that brought you here as if through haze. If only the other shitposters could see you now. If only they knew all those foul things they posted could actually come true now that Equestria was real. You think "IWTCIRD" and inwardly chuckle. What had you wasted your life on?

Sitting there with AJ, a chilled bottle of apple juice now firmly in your hand with a warm slice of apple pie snug in your stomach, your emotions were soaring. This morning you felt the worst a person could go, but after a near-death experience and some time outside, you felt so happy. Not for long, though.

-

Before you could enjoy the radiant sun much longer, you hear ushered voices. With both you and AJ turning round to identify the source, you briefly see Rainbow Dash flapping in the air. She seemed to be speaking with someone on the ground though they were obscured by the barn.

AJ, who was also partaking in some chilled apple juice, gets up. As you see her orange rear recede she looks at you and jerks her head in the direction of noise, clearly communicating for you to go with. Sigh.

As you both go from the back of the house to the front of the barn, you hear voices getting louder. It sounds like both Twilight, Dash and... Rarity. The first two seemed to be comforting their friend, while the third...

"Howdy ya'll!" AJ announces, crossing to the front of the bar. Desperately you stay out of sight. With all of them there? Hell it was going to get horribly cringe-worthy, and fast. No dice though as AJ practically pulls you into view. Well, at least you identified the voices correctly.

With 4 sets of pony eyes on you, you can only look back at Rarity. Her usual sleek, curly mane of deep violet is frizzed up, and as soon your eyes meet hers, her face contorts into the biggest scrunchy-face imaginable.

Bracing yourself for the sonic boom of voice; there's nothing. Slightly confused, you continue watching the scrunchy-face reach levels of mass proportion before, finally, the flood gates open. Rarity breaks down into dramatic, loud, hysterical sobs.

-

Dash puts a foreleg around Rarity, all 3 ponies looking at you expectantly. Here goes, curling up your toes inside your new boots.

"...I'm sorry, Rarity. It was wrong of me to run off like that."

"And?" Dash adds.

"And? Uhm... Sorry I put myself in danger in the forest?"

"And!?" Dash nudges on.

"Sorry for... letting my hair get stuck down your drain?" you say wildly as the ponies all collectively go "Eww". Thankfully Twilight steps in.

"I think Dash wants you to also apologize for making Rarity worry."

"Worry? About ol' me?" you chime in, trying to sound jovial. It doesn't work.

Speaking through loud, wailing sobs, Rarity blurts out "I WAS SO WORRIED! Who knows WHAT you were planning!" You think those words over for a second...

"Planning?" you repeat though you can see where this is going. You had just been dealt a crushing blow of news only yesterday, one that affects your entire life. Could it even push one to extremes...? No, never. You now understood Rarity's concern though.

"Oh Rarity, I'd never do that." you say truthfully. As you approach her, Dash backs off and lets you give Rarity a hug. Her sobs now reach maximum volume blasting your right ear. Giving a helpless look to the other ponies, you see AJ tilt her hat forward, obscuring her face.

"In the end, we're all here and well!" Twilight says happily, "This will make a great entry into our friendship diary!"

Heh, same old socially awkward Twilight.

-

After apologizing to Rarity she slowly begins to calm down. "Slowly" being a rather loose term, as she still sobs for another 10 minutes or so. You finally manage to make her stop crying by showing her the shiny boots that Applejack gave to you. Immediately, Rarity's eyes light up and she starts blabbering about potential cowboy designs she could make for you. Yeah, nah.

At the end of the day though, the drama was over - everyone's exhausted. To celebrate this little get-together, and because it was getting near that time, Applejack decides to host a little dinner party for everyone. An hour passes and everyone who matters is there: The mane 6, AJ's family and Spike. After a massive feast of apple-related treats, you all laze out on the grass soaking up the soothing sun at Apple Acres.

While this peaceful end to a traumatic day was wonderful n' all, Twilight was starting to get on your nerves. If she wasn't constantly chatting away at your ear, she was offering your more food. Not wanting to be rude, and not to upset AJ's cooking pride, you kept accepting. By the end of the party, you've eaten about 8 slices of apple pie, 3 apples and 5 or 6 fritters; all fermented in 3 pints of apple cider. Honestly it was getting near barfing point, and thankfully the sun sank below the trees when it did.

"Looks like the Sun's setting, I think we should probably all start heading back" Twilight announces, picking up Spike.

"Awwww!" Pinkie cries deflating dramatically.

-

Departing from Apple Acres as a group, stomachs full of apple-treats and moods soaring, everybody says their goodbyes to the Apple family. AJ stands out front waving her hat frantically.

"Ya'll come again!"

Damn right you would as you recall that job offer. A minute later, both Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash fly into the deep red sky waving their forehooves as they go. They seemed to somewhat accept you now which was a happy thought. You even managed to break the ice with Fluttershy after talking about your Timberwolf experience. She claimed it was your own fault for "scaring" them. You just laughed it off.

The walk was wonderful with your boots protecting your ruined feet though your bulging belly was being a source of discomfort. You had definitely eaten too much tonight. All too soon you were arriving at the dismal Carousel Boutique, Twilight giving a few words before her departure.

"I hope you both try getting along better. I know it's tough but you can do this! If you need any help, you know where I live!"

Ugh, always trying to be the voice of reason. You and Rarity just nod.

Upon Entering all energy is drained from your body; instead being directed to the food-baby you were currently supporting. Slinking upstairs, sleep was the only goal.

"'Night Rarity... we'll talk about it all tomorrow" you mumble. She smiles, waving to you.

Back in the dismal room it's time to escape these dirty clothes.

As you undress, you glance in the mirror.

A bold number "20" is displayed on your hip.

-

You blink. There you stand half-naked, glazing at your reflection with your top already thrown onto the floor, trousers half-way down your legs. Surely this must be some trick of the light? It was pretty dark in here, plus you were covered mud and bruises. Still... you need to check this out.

Taking a cold hand and running it over your hip you try to feel the strange marking, even pinching it slightly. There's no distinct texture, feeling just like skin. It's almost like it's actually -in- your skin but... how's that possible? Maybe time to postpone the early night plans and instead head for the bathroom to wash this off.

Yanking up your trousers and spinning on the spot, you dash to the door and throw it open with a bit more vigor that was needed. Speedily tip-toeing across the hall, you wanted to avoid Rarity's concerns at the moment. Unfortunately sneaking wasn't enough, as after you close the bathroom door you hear a call of

"Are you alright? I just saw you practically zip across the hall topless!"

Quick, say something assuring.

"Uh I'm fine! Just need... bathroom. Too many apples. Plus, clean mud and stuff."

Praying to Celestia that Rarity didn't catch on to your empty explanation, you stand silently heart thumping.

"Okay dear. I should probably give you credit - I didn't really take you as the hygienic type!"

Painfully swallowing your response to this you wait until Rarity's retreating trots are heard, followed by her bedroom door closing.

-

After hastily locking the door, trousers are instantly abandoned and you stand fully naked in Rarity's bathroom with just a few bandages attached. With the light in here being sufficient enough, the mirror is your first port of call.

Yeesh. It's not a pretty sight. Your hair was sticking up at strange angles after being gelled with tree sap; scratches littered your face and proceeded across your arms and knees; mud was grossly stuck to your body and your feet looked positively diseased. Enough of this shit you say internally, sticking your hip towards the mirror.

There was no mistaking now, what looked like "20M" was marked on your skin like a grotesque tattoo. What the utter fuck? This just feels so wrong on so many levels. It's like you've been branded, as if someone was somehow taking ownership of you. Immediately directing your attention to the sink and twisting the cold tap you start slapping freezing water over the mark in a futile attempt to wash it off. If anything, it only stands bolder. Entering a bit of a frenzy you turn round to try again, only to notice another marking on the other hip. Shit. You'd only seen your right side, but now you got a view of your left. There's another "20M" marked there.

As you try to think up the wildest, silliest explanations for this, none stick. It's beginning to dawn on you that the obvious was happening here, and yet you completely refuse to admit it. It's completely preposterous.

No way in hell was this your cutie mark.

-

With this rancid thought penetrating your brain, you feel lost. This was the first piece of solid evidence that flat-out proves you weren't supposed to be here in Equestria. You do consider having a freak-out, but the mental image of projectile vomiting your apple-flavored food-baby all over the bathroom, and Rarity's resulting reaction slow you down. You're too tired to be upset at the moment, so instead, you settle for another bath.

Filling the tub up, squirting in various expensive soaps and swishing the foam around... You don't know why but bubble baths make you really relaxed. Removing most of the bandages and slipping into the aromatic waters there's a slight stinging in your ruined feet. As they're drowned in the tub the pain slowly subsides and you lie there basking in comfort, trying not to think about weird hip tattoos.

Washing away the day's filth and shame was just what you needed. You decide the bath is over when the water reaches an alarming brown color, and proceed to get out and dry off. With one last sorry look at your hip in the mirror, you drain the bath and exit.

So this really was happening. Just like Twilight said - You were changing. You still don't understand. Right now isn't the time to care though as your mind fogs over. Easing into the futon and rubbing your stomach, you belch. Sleeping with a full stomach is a terrible idea, but so was accepting all that damned food. Well, if worst comes to worst, toilet's just across the hall...

-

Sleep was fighting back that night. Every few hours you'd jerk awake having no recollection of any dreams or any indication to why you awoke. After lulling back into another light doze, the cycle would start again. Getting fed-up and feeling incredibly stuffy under the covers, you reluctantly open a weak eye.

Faint sunlight is beginning to leak into the room, meaning it couldn't be any later than 6am. You were desperate to sleep for longer, yet the poorly re-applied bandages were itching uncomfortably in the heat and now that you were awake you realized that you needed to use the bathroom. Guess the food-baby was finally digested. Might explain the stuffy futon...

As you sit up and rub your eyes with your palms, there's a new sensation. When moving, you felt a rather odd weight on your chest. Unable to see properly through bleary eyes, you crawl in front of the mirror and take a proper look. You soon wish you hadn't, as you are met with a new pair of breasts. Why did you have to sleep topless?

Without thinking, you grab the left one. Oh god, what? It's so soft and squishy and yet as you cup it there's a rather tender feel. Are these man-tits from eating all that food? That's just fuckin' silly. On further inspection your nipples were looking larger too, with a hint of perkiness.

Still in a groggy state, you firmly squeeze the breast. You instantly regret it, as it hurts quite a lot. Your yelp doesn't sound though, as you realize you have no voice anymore.

-

Chapter 6

The Get Chapter 6 -

Hands leaping to your throat, you try desperately to speak out loud. Nothing.

This is such a weird sensation. You can feel the words form in your mind; the air being correctly pushed out via your lungs, but then there's a disconnect at your larynx. It feels like your breath is completely bypassing that area, but how?

In an attempt to make -any- noise you try humming, coughing, even screaming. Nothing but the disconcerting sound of gargling air. Was this an illness? Do human infections like laryngitis exist in Equestria?

In a final attempt at speech you try a forced whisper. With the sounds being created from air in your mouth you can completely bypass your voice box. The result, however, is a practically silent hiss that sounds absolutely terrifying. Might only use this in an emergency, then.

Clutching your throat you try think of another solution. Maybe having a drink will sort this out? Or rinsing your mouth out with salt water? That's what your mother always made you do if you had a sore throat back on Earth. That requires effort, though...

With one last succulent look at your new breasts reflected in the mirror, you get up. Your new bulk jiggles slightly, and you can't help catching yourself ogling your new mammary glands. Sure, this whole scenario was pretty fucked up and further sealed your doom, but at the same time, you've not seen human tits in ages.

Having no concept of female modesty you walk out your room topless and head down into the kitchen to get a drink. Rarity won't be up for another hour or so yet anyway.

-

Having this new mass on your chest was annoying, you decide. While filling up a glass with warm water and adding salt you keep accidentally knocking your breasts. Having lived your whole life with the area directly in front of your chest free from obstruction, you were starting to realize just how much you took it for granted. Holding a glass at chest-height, moving arms up and down around that area... the whole concept of your spacial awareness had now all changed.

With a soundless sigh - akin to a deflating tire - you tip the salt water into your mouth and start gargling. It prickles your gums and brings back some bitter-sweet memories of your childhood. This was your mom's cure-all to anything mouth-related. To be honest, it never really worked, even back then. Now it's just some weird placebo effect, you guess. Ugh, thinking about your childhood like this wasn't doing wonders for your mood. As you frantically force your mind onto other thoughts you accidentally swallow some salt water.

You gag, before snorting the water all over yourself. Aw fuck, last thing you need is salt water in your wounds. Quickly placing the glass aside you remove your Timberwolf bite bandage before the wicked water soaks in. To your utter astonishment though, there is no bite anymore. That... can't be right.

Cross-referencing your knees and arms, you're amazed to discover that all little grazes and scratches are... gone. Actually, now that you think about it, weren't you walking around the kitchen on your bandaged feet despite them being mangled in your saga in the forest?

-

There's only one conclusion to draw here: your wounds have regenerated. That's some shit right there, and yet you can't feel too disappointed about it. This day was starting out as strange as any other, and despite it being before the crack of dawn you might as well embrace the day.

Proceeding upstairs and slipping into the bathroom you flick off your PJ bottoms with a swift kick, only to be greeted with your ugly cutie mark. You'd forgotten about that. Gloom begins to fill your chest as you realize your special talent is a shitpost. That's how these things worked, right? What kind of identity was that?

Starting with the usual mirror check, you again eye your new breasts. You can't deny it: they're damn fine. Even though technically they're yours you can't prevent yourself thinking about them in a rather male-like fashion. Would rubbing one out to yourself count as narcissism? You chuckle internally.

With the remaining bandages remove the rest of your skin appears mainly unaltered, lacking in any cuts or bruises. Thankfully your male junk was still intact, albeit looking a bit sad and shriveled this morning. Probably suffering from the cold bathroom, eh? It wasn't the only part of your body complaining as notice your long, erect nipples. Gross. Hopefully warm water will perk everything up.

As you scrub away in the shower you're mortified to find that all your chest hair starts falling out with relative ease. Barely held in place, a single stroke of the hand dislodges most hairs from your body leaving the skin bare and smooth. Remembering yesterday's fiasco, you make sure not to clog the drain again...

-

While in the euphoria of a steamy shower your mind awakens from layers of haze and sleep. It begins to dawn on you how well you were taking this. Only yesterday you were in complete denial, screaming and pissing all over yourself fuss over Twilight's revelations. Today? There was physical proof that change WAS happening, and yet you couldn't get flustered about it. Was this a good or a bad sign? Perhaps you were still emotionally drained.

There was still no clear indication of what's going on here; your hunger for knowledge reaching a peak. Just why where you here? Why Posters? What actually happened to them? Surely there was some bigger picture behind all this that made more sense than Celestia's explanation of "To live care-free forever". Thinking back to your time with her, you actually recall her saying the term "reborn."

It dawns on you. The soap slips from your shocked grasp.

Did that mean she's fuckin' known this whole time? After all of her bullshitting and question-dodging, she knew you would be subjected to 'change'? But she'd been so supportive and caring when you arrived! Why would she conceal critical information?

You let out a silent, angry roar. This sudden feeling of betrayal was constricting, as if a close friend had grabbed and twisted your lungs. That's it. You're going to have to arrange another meeting with her, and soon.

Shaking rage takes hold of you as you get frustrated with cleaning. Hunching over to collect the soap at your feet your soapy breasts flop into your vision. Impatient, you swat them out the way but this just ends up in you hurting them again. Argh.

-

Drying carelessly and throwing on your only pair of clean clothes, you stomp down the stairs to make the usual bowl of fruit for breakfast. Still seething, it's not long before you hear the sounds of someone lurking about upstairs. Must of woken Rarity. Ignoring her you continue to eat in a slight frenzy. You'd eaten so much last night, and yet now you were totally starving again.

After scarfing the contents of the bowl and casting it aside with zest, you stand up full of vigor, ready to batter on with your day. It may be early but goddamn you were going to pay Twilight a visit right now. Being a prancey Princess n' all she must have communication links to Celestia. Yeah, it was all playing out in your head: Go over there, slam the door in, yell the place down, demanding ans- oh. Right, you have no voice at the moment. Figures.

You slowly slink forward onto the table, slightly banging your head in defeat. This only makes you become aware that you're now crushing your boobs against the table. Ugh, how do girls put up with these useless things?

Before you get to wallow in these emotions much further, a long sleepy yawn sounds from the bottom of the stairs makes you turn around. It's Rarity; sporting her fluffy gown, towel wrapped round her mane with a green mud mask obscuring her face.

"Oh, it's you. Why are you up so early dear?" she questions, looking at you slouching over the table. How do you even begin explaining yourself?

-

As Rarity sits down at the table you try smiling weakly at her. Your discomfort must be plain as day, as she quickly raises an eyebrow.

"Are you okay? I thought you'd be having a long lie today after yesterday..." she trails off, obviously not wanting to recall it.

So how does one explain they've lost their voice? Sitting up, you decide miming would be your best bet. Maybe pointing at your mouth and waggling your lips? Or maybe clutching your throat, or...

"Goodness me! What's that on your chest?!" Rarity shrieks leaping back. "Is that a lump? Dear, have you caught some kind of chest infection!?" Her alarm catches you off-guard and you try to shush her, yet...

"Your VOICE, it's GONE! Oh Celestia, this is terrible! This is the WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!"

Rarity begins to hyperventilate, backing away from you. You try to explain you're not ill, but it's a hard point to convey when you have no voice. Awkwardly flatting your chest and standing up you beckon Rarity over and put a hand to your forehead. At first she looks anxious, but seems to understand your intention.

Slowly trotting over she raises a slightly shaking hoof to your head and checks your temperature. When it's apparent you're not dying from a fever or some equally dangerous disease, she seems to relax.

"But... what about the lumps?" Rarity continues, jerking her head towards your boobs. God, this was going to be awkward to explain. Talking the easy way out, you just idly wave a hand as if to say "Don't worry about it".

-

"But this certainly won't do!" Rarity exclaims after calming down knowing you're not your deathbed. "If you can't speak, we need to visit the hospital! Or the vet, whichever comes first..."

Rolling your eyes at this, you try to communicate that you want to visit the library. Desperately, you pick up a book and putting a finger to your temple you pull a stupid, cross-eyed face while sticking your tongue out. Rarity stares blankly at you before she giggles.

"...Is that supposed to be Twilight? That's a bit mean, dear."

Mean or not, you didn't care as long as you got your point across - which you had.

You end up waiting another hour or so for Rarity to remove her mud mask and pamper herself for the day ahead. You're already set to go, donned in your cowboy boots. You're still being immensely pleased with them, but guilt wells up inside at the prospect of not helping AJ at Apple Acres today.

Rarity finally descends the stairs gracefully, and after quickly putting food out for Opalescence you depart the Carousel Boutique. Mega déjà vu.

As you brave through the early morning sun the many ponies of Ponyville seem as energetic as ever. You seem to be attracting more glances than usual though and it's a little off-putting. Was this because of the panic you created yesterday? Or was your appearance just that startling?

Trying to distract yourself from what others thought, you turn to Rarity. Trotting jovially, eyes closed and nose in the air, she seemed to be quite content. That made a first.

-

Channeling your earlier rage at Celestia withholding information, you hammer at the library door. Rarity gasps in shock at your sudden burst of force, and just as she's about to tell you off the door swings open. Twilight stands there, and you see a definite twinkle in her eyes.

"Aha! Mr. Poster, I was expecting you today. Hello Rarity!" she smiles, "Won't you both come in? I think I know what this is about."

That... doesn't sound very reassuring. Regardless, you follow in her wake giving Spike a dirty look as you pass.

"How are you today? Recovered from your exciting bout in the Everfree forest?" Twilight asks you directly. You can't reply, so resort to looking at Rarity for help.

"Oh right. Well, it seems today that our friend has lost his voice. There's also some disfiguring on his... chest area." Rarity states, saying the last bit with a hint of disgust.

Before you know it Twilight is poking one of your free-hanging breasts with her horn. You're in half a mind to slap her away, such lewd behavior in a sensitive area! Well, maybe back on Earth it was.

"Rarity, this isn't disfigurement - These are mammary glands! Mr. Poster seems to be blooming into womanhood!"

God, as she says it your stomach turns over, blood flushes to your face. Talk about an knee-jerkingly embarrassing statement.

Your feelings go unnoticed however as Twilight abruptly uses magic to force your mouth open. It's a horrible sensation, like someone was slipping a large 9v battery down your throat.

-

You gag slightly, causing her to stop.

"Sorry if that was uncomfortable - I kinda got carried away!" Twilight says hesitantly, "it definitely seems your experiencing internal changes though. Can you speak at all?"

You shake your head, not really wanting to do the creepy whisper.

"This is all so excellent!" Twilight exclaims excitedly, clopping her hooves together.

"What's so excellent about it, dear?" Rarity questions, lost at Twilight's enthusiasm.

"I'm so glad you asked, Rarity! After our talk the day before, I have been heavily researching Mr. Poster; his fellows and their lives in Equestria."

At this you perk up. You wanted all of this delicious information, and you wanted it now. You nod vigorously, encouraging the annoying purple pony to continue. She acknowledges.

"Okay then. Well, let's begin." Twilight begins to pace around, picking up books with her magic. "As you may or may not know, there are 3 other posters in Equestria. You are the 4th, and most likely not the last. I have little information about WHY you're here, but it seems to be related to the 'posting' you do in your world."

Twilight pauses, and you nod showing you knew as much. She continues,

"Existing in Equestria is having an adverse affect on you, Mr. Poster, as you know. Seeing you today has proven my original theory was actually wrong, though."

What theory was that? You were barely listening at the that time...

"The world isn't digesting you, instead you're digesting it."

-

What's this now? You were getting tired of Twilight's vore analogies. Resigned, you wave a hand passively as if to say "proceed".

Letting out a small "Ahem", Twilight continues randomly swishing books around in the air. You're certain there's no real purpose to it except to give off an "impressive" vibe.

"As I explained to you before, our worlds are different. Equestria is based on magic, yours isn't" Twilight explains. Yeah, you knew this - What's she getting at?

"It was just a theory though, and you've just proven to me that it's wrong! The magic isn't actively affecting you because of what you're made of, like I initially believed."

That's good I guess? Where was this going?

"Instead, you're inflicting this on yourself with the air you breathe! The water you drink! The food you eat! For example, all the food you've eaten here has been produced in Equestria, and thus contains magic."

Magic this, magic that. Magic can't exist, it's just not logical. Surely there must be some "Science of Magic" books in this library that explain it on a nano-scopic level or something...

"Are you listening, Mr. Poster?" Twilight interjects. You hastily look away from the bookshelf you were eyeing up. Was she still talking? You thought you were going to get answers about Posters and why you were here, not a "Twilight knows more than you" lecture.

"What I'm saying is, when you eat or sleep, you change!"

Oh. That's where this was going. Fuck.

-

Your two favorite things: Eating and Sleeping... were they now the source of your demise?

"When you eat food, inhale air, whatever, your body is using them as fuel to function and repair. As a result, it's having an adverse affect on your person!" Twilight says in a increasingly incredulous voice. "You're absorbing the world, and that's what's changing you to physically exist here."

Taking all this in, you lean back and sit on a table. So if you never eat or sleep again, you'll remain as you are? How does Twilight know this, though?

"How do you know this, though?" Rarity questions, as if taking the words straight from your mind.

"Well..." Twilight trails off, her face flushing a little bit. "I reached this theory yesterday, but as soon as I came to discuss it with you two, well, a certain someone was missing. Obviously we got distracted. However, after we solved our little problem another chance arrived at Applejack's."

You clasp a hand to your head. No way, the reason she kept offering you food...?

"It wasn't too hard, as Mr. Poster was quite willing to eat up." Twilight giggles. Your fists clench. "I wanted to see if there would be any significant body changes in relation to how much mass he ingested. As a result..."

So Twilight was to blame? Well, not for everything, but for making you grow tits overnight?

Some of your silent fury must have shown on your face, as Twilight's ears flop and her face falls quite dramatically.

"Did... did I do something wrong?"

-

The sadness that suddenly filled her voice broke your resolve, and you felt awful. Being unable to voice your comforts and apologies, you quickly look around the desk for a quill and some ink.

Holding them up you mimic writing on parchment which thankfully Rarity provides, floating some onto your lap. You'd never changed the subject of a vocal conversation with a drawing before, but hell-be-damned you were going to try.

Scribbling a stickman with boobs, you then draw a blank speech bubble coming from its mouth annotating it with a question mark. It has been so long since you've held a drawing utensil in your hand that your doodles look particularly bad, all shaky and smudged. The temptation to also draw a giant penis on the parchment for old time's sake reaches a critical point, but you decide it's not really the time or place.

Thrusting the paper to Twilight, she looks at it slightly crest-fallen before her ears perk up again.

"Oh, you want to know why you've lost your voice? This also reminds me... where are your bandages?" Curiosity certainly seemed to be grasping her imagination again; the mopey face becoming one of deep interest.

Damn you were good.

"I guess all that excess food you ate really did have a big affect on you." Twilight begins, walking close and peering at you with a large purple eye. "My only guess is that dead tissue from your original Earth-body is replaced much faster with the new Equestrian-sourced tissue."

Off she goes again.

-

For sometime Twilight witters on about her theories and how they must be correct. It's decided that your voice is gone because of all the shouting and yelling you had taken part in yesterday, mixed with "accelerated" healing, caused it to get inflamed. That's what you took from it anyway, barely listening now.

"...And that brings me to my next point. The Poster/Mentor system" Twilight finishes off.

Now we're getting somewhere interesting. It seems to have captured Rarity's attention too as she stops fiddling with her hair. Twilight notices this sudden rapt attention, and let's out a little false sigh.

"Okay, okay. So there's 4 Posters in Equestria - The first arrived a year or so ago. In their post, they chose Applejack." Twilight begins. You already know of this Poster even if it's just their name, "Sam".

Rarity looks a bit uneasy. She knew that this was a rather taboo subject around Applejack, who'd never discussed it with any of her friends. Curiosity had been eating Rarity's insides for too long, and she was eager for some answers.

"Do you know anything about AJ's Poster, Twilight dear?"

"No, Rarity. And even if I did, it'd be a top secret. You know how important keeping secrets is for friends!" Twilight pipes up, "Now where was I... Oh yes, the following two Posters arrived about 9 months back. Both being tied to musical ponies, they live somewhere in Canterlot I believe. You're rather special Mr. Poster, the 2nd of your kind in Ponyville!"

Such an achievement, you think bitterly to yourself.

-

"From our point of view, the Poster chooses the pony." Twilight continues, "Though I don't really know rhyme or reason behind it. Can you explain, Mr. Poster?"

There's a little silence.

"Oh yeah, you can't speak. Oops!" Twilight chuckles.

Starting to get annoyed you pick up the quill again and start scribbling on the back of the stickman-with-boobs parchment. Twilight ignores this, continuing her blabbering.

"We don't really know the fate of any of the Posters. It's strange; for such unique phenomenons, you'd think they'd be better documented. Perhaps there's a conspiracy there!" Twilight laughs again.

"Say Twilight, there's one thing that I've wondered" Rarity begins, "How long will this whole... trans-whatsit take? Is there any information about how long our friend has in his current form?"

This question distracts you from your drawing. You look up at Twilight with a grim expression.

"Well... I don't know really." Twilight apologizes.

Solid tension beings brewing in the room now, choking the air.

"We've established the whole process is dependent on how much is eaten, along side how much sleep is taken, but I think we're looking at-"

Crash.

You all get distracted as Spike loudly clatters into the room wobbling a tray of tea above his head. Rolling her eyes, Rarity forcefully levitates the tray out of his arms and places it neatly on the table. She gives him a rather reproachful look.

God damn it, this suspense was killing you.

"...A month."

-

"A month?" you lip wordlessly. Does this take into account the previous week too? How would this whole process play out? Is it gradual? Instant?

You slap yourself firmly on the forehead a few times, trying to vent the frustration of having all the questions in the world but no voice to ask them.

Twilight and Rarity look rather alarmed at this sudden self-harm, and soon enough Twilight forces your violent limb down with her magic. The sudden feeling of your arms being dragged away by invisible handcuffs wasn't pleasant, and it quickly causes you to lose balance and slip off the table.

"Mr. Poster, please don't hurt yourself!" Twilight pleads.

Rubbing your behind, you look up with a rather sour expression. Soundlessly you spit out cusses that no one will ever hear.

"Come now," Rarity chips in, "I understand this is all awful news to you, but Spikey-wikey brought some tea so let's just forget about all for now."

Seriously? You wish you could forget all this over a tiny cup of tea. No one seemed particularly interested in how you felt at the moment, instead discussing you like some interesting science project. You had feelings too, which were randomly amplifying beyond your control these days.

"Let's have a tea break - maybe hot liquid will soothe your throat." Twilight begins placing a cup on your lap.

As if you'll drink or eat now knowing what it's doing to you. Rarity and Twilight watch you while you view Spike's amused expression. Now you feel like a naughty child again.

-

Inhaling deeply through the nose and exhaling out the mouth, you stand up. Depositing your tea cup neatly on the tray you go back to your scribble. If you needed to communicate something, it was this.

Twilight and Rarity occasion cast concerned glances it gets distracting. Bitter feelings of depression and doom quickly bubble within. Every time you came a little bit closer to accepting what was happening, it'd be kicked up a notch. First you learned you were stuck here forever, then going to turn female, then into a pony, and now it's there's a month time-limit? No wonder there's no other Posters around, they all probably ran - or galloped - to the hills to avoid this insanity.

The library falls silent as you continue sketching out a large winged horse with a sun on its rear. Next to it you draw another stick figure with boobs, labeling off with "???". Surely Twilight would understand this as a request to meet Celestia you think, handing over the parchment.

Twilight levitates it at eye-height, skimming over the drawing as Rarity shuffles over to get a better view.

"Uhm, are you asking what Princess Celestia thinks of you?" Twilight takes a stab. What? No! You point at the parchment, shaking your head.

"How did the Princess find you?" Rarity guesses. Again you shake your head.

"Who is the Princess?" Twilight voices, bemused. Frustration reaches a new peak.

"How to see the Princess?" Spike voices. God, you could hug him.

-

Nodding and pointing at Spike you try and confirm that, yes, you do want to see Celestia. Spike lets out a little "Heh", obviously proud of himself. Smug wee prick.

Twilight looks a bit unsettled by your demand. As a matter of fact, she looked slightly hurt.

"Are my answers not sufficient enough?" she begins to pout.

They were, for the most part. However, you couldn't help feeling "citation needed" for some parts. Celestia, being the mesmerizing magic mare she was, knew all the answers.

"Well, if that's who you want... I guess Spike can send a letter for you, just tell him what you want to- oh" she tails off, the obvious sinking in.

The afternoon is spent trying to communicate what you wanted to say, with the final result being along the lines of "Greetings Princess, would it be possible to meet again soon?"

Spike seals the deal by puffing his chest and wheezing green flames on to the sealed scroll. With that out of the way, you were done here. Twilight had already said enough - there wasn't much documentation on Posters, everything you loved was destroying you, and in a month you'd be munching haying like the rest. Your body now pines for food, as your mind begs for escapism. It might not be too late to visit Apple Acres...

You make eye contact with Rarity after the letter is sent, tilting your head towards the exit. She understands, though turns to look at a rather glum-looking Twilight who was tidying up the mess of books that had been levitated everywhere.

-

"Well Twilight, it's getting late" Rarity says hesitantly. "Thank you for your help, I'm sure he," she jerks her head to you, "appreciates it too." You nod.

"It's fine guys, I'm sorry I'm not more use." Twilight mopes slightly. You didn't realize she had such low confidence.

With a slight sigh, you walk over and give Twilight an awkward hug round the neck. She freezes on contact, but relaxes after understanding what was happening. Rarity joins in too, and the 3 of you share the most awkward hug you've ever experienced. Spike looks on with his arms crossed; rolling his eyes he walks upstairs.

The hug breaks off, and you and Rarity prepare to leave.

"One moment, I have a little gift for you Mr. Poster" Twilight calls, levitating something wrapped in brown paper. "I think you'll appreciate this, though maybe hold off opening it until later on."

Neat, a present. As you pocket it, you take a quick feel through the wrappings. Whatever it is crinkles slightly, feeling like folded paper. Was it a book or something equally as exciting?

With that, you and Rarity escape into the afternoon air. Time for the next challenge - How do you communicate you want to go to Apple Acres?

"So shall we return to the Boutique and have a sewing session?" Rarity asks nonchalantly.

Not really, no. You shake your head.

"Well, lunch? You didn't drink your tea I noticed."

Nope. You point in the direction of Apple Acres, then at your boots.

"Again?" Rarity sighs, "Are you avoiding me?"

-

Again? Avoiding? What was Rarity on about? You'd only spent yesterday at Apple Acres, and it was such a nice change of scenery that you were quite excited about heading back.

"Wouldn't you rather go back and do some sewing? I am supposed to be looking after you, you know." Rarity repeats in a sulky tone.

Why was she asking this now? You could sense her emotions better than you'd have liked to admit, and this was a very dangerous path.

"We could finish those curtains we were making! Or style your hair, it's really awful now. We could do anything really, the Boutique is closed." she trails off, awaiting your answer.

Being put on the spot like this wasn't what you had in mind. On one hand, you could go with Rarity and you wouldn't really mind, she was nice enough when she wanted to be. On the other hand, you could sweat all your worries away by doing some physical work, forgetting yourself. You begin to awkwardly hop in place, utterly lost and not knowing which to choose. Do you please Rarity, or do you please yourself?

Your hesitation is answer enough for Rarity. She jumps to the conclusion you're not interested in going with her, giving a loud "Hmph".

"Fine, I guess you don't want to hang with ittle-wittle-Rarity. No, instead let's go get sweaty and dirty on that filthy farm." she retorts. You're taken aback by this sudden aggression.

Before you communicate she can come with, she storms away indignantly.

What, does she expect you to call after her?

-

Standing there dumbstruck you watch Rarity get engulfed by a crowd of ponies going about their daily business. If you had a voice you'd have called out to her. Hell, you'd have tried to bring her with you. As always though, she played the drama card.

With no real alternative, you drag your heels to Apple Acres. It's a refreshing experience being out in Ponyville during business hours; crowds of villagers pulling their carts, chatting away, buying and selling their hoof-made wares. A few of them even greet you, recognizing you as that person who arrived with Celestia that one time. Maybe you were more to them than that? They did make you that welcome banner after all.

On the edge of Ponyville, your heart sinks. Maybe you should have chased after Rarity... There was no logical pattern or understanding to the relationship you both shared. Before, she was your favorite pony. Then, technically, you forced yourself in to her life. When you lived under the same roof she treated you like a misbehaving pet until that moment of weakness happened. From there you'd both bonded, and she'd been putting in effort to repair the relationship... only for you to throw it back in her face. She'd gone up and down the pony tier-list so many times in just one week, and you're even less sure how you feel about her now.

Apple Acres is ahead, and just as you begin opening the gate you realize how difficult this was going to be with no voice. You wouldn't be able to explain jack-shit, let alone ask questions about the job.

-

Just as you turn away deciding to forget the whole thing, a voice calls out

"Well, I wasn't expecting you for a few days."

Looking up hill towards the barn you see a familiar stetson. There's Applejack waving down at you. Reluctantly you wave back; now that you've acknowledged her you can't exactly retreat. Shrugging your shoulders, you begin hiking up towards her as she trots down to greet you with a complacent look about her.

"Howdy then Poster, are ya here for some serious apple buckin'?" she asks smiling up at you. You nod, hoping to avoid any questions. That lasts for about 2 seconds.

"What happened to yer chest?!" AJ recoils in alarm, noticing the bothersome female chest-bumps. You wave a dismissive hand, trying not to think of Twilight's awkward announcement from earlier on.

"Is that from the injuries you got over yonder in the forest? I don't know what kind of critter would do that though..."

This conversation had to end before it got worse, so you whip out an arm to point at Big Mac who was carting a large batch of shiny apples.

"What's that, you want to get started already?" AJ voices up looking surprised. "Also why aren't ya'll talking? We're friends now, right?"

The way she said that was so cute, and you nod to agree. Rummaging in your pocket, you pull out the crumpled parchment you doodled the stickman on. Trying to hide the Celestia side, you instead show the image concerning your lost voice. AJ squints her eye at it, before asking "Is this charades?"

-

Despite not being charades, it sure played like it. After 5 minutes of frantically shaking and nodding your head, you get the point across that you have no voice. AJ laughs at the news saying you'll get along just fine with Big Mac.

Basking in the mid-afternoon sun you feel a surge of enthusiasm. Fuck everything that's happened to you; it's time to work it all off. You need a distraction from life right now, and mindlessly collecting shiny apples seemed the perfect answer.

You set up a routine: Big Mac pulls the cart carrying baskets; AJ bucks the trees; you collect any straggling apples from the ground. You also have to do quality control, throwing rotten apples into a separate basket used for pig feed.

This is exactly what you wanted: some kind of physical activity to keep you distracted. It echos your old job stacking shelves in a supermarket. Sure, it was as boring as all hell, but it kept you constantly busy leaving little time to be with your thoughts.

For 2 or 3 hours the three of you crack on. You make a small game out of it, seeing how fast you could harvest 4 trees as a team. It's good fun, though sweat is starting to leak everywhere and lack of food/water was starting to take its toll on your body. You can't be weak though! You must prevent yourself ingesting any more of Equestria.

Eventually night creeps over Apple Achres, and AJ calls it a day. Heading back to the Apple's farm house you're offered a seat at their dinner table, but you decline. AJ stubbornly insists, and eventually brings you out some pie and apple juice. You just stare at it, hating yourself.

-

There's a moment of silence; AJ's great green eyes searching your face.

"Aren't ya hungry?" she ask with rather confused tone, waving a hoof at the food she'd brought out. "Don't ya want it?"

Yeah, you wanted it. Really badly. Just imagining that moist apple pie sailing into your mouth and caressing your tongue got the ol' saliva glands going into overdrive. Yet, you're so thirsty that when your saliva glands actually do contract nothing happens bar an uncomfortable squeezing sensation. The glorious glass bottle of apple juice taunted you, flashing its inner liquid gold. Just contemplating how famished you were made you feel dizzy and fatigued, and yet...

"Why do you look so sad?" AJ asks concerned, "You're not hurt are ya?"

You shake your head, giving an involuntary shudder.

"Not hungry? But you've been working out in the field all afternoon!" she accuses, just as your stomach gargles loudly.

Ugh. You knew choosing not to eat wasn't a feasible, long-term solution. If anything, it'd only slow changes down. Even then though if you don't drink anything you'll likely be dead this time tomorrow. However... eating would be like admitting defeat; you'd personally be sealing your fate for good. You still don't even really believe this is happening, right?

Heart full of remorse, you stretch out an arm and accept the apple juice. Liquid only; no food. But then again, AJ's apple pies are literally god-tier...

Taking the bottle of juice you suddenly ram it into your mouth, draining the contents like they were the nectar of life. Your mind was filled pure greed and lust.

-

Slopping drops of juice down your chin in the process, the sensual experience of a chilled drink lubricating your mouth and unsticking your throat was wondrous. As the liquid slowly descends down to your empty gut you feel the path it travels internally cool. Finally you come up for air, gasping and pating, only to discover - in horror - that the bottle has already drained. God, you really, -really- needed that.

AJ laughs at the spontaneous display of appalling manners.

"You sure are a weird 'un. Take this pie with you, if you don't eat it now you can eat it later."

Take it with me? Does she want me to leave? Suppose it is pretty dark now. You realize you still have a stroppy Rarity to deal with back home. Home? When'd you start calling it that?

"Actually, do ya wanna..." AJ begins, rubbing a nervous hoof on the ground. "...hang out?"

Well, this was a rather weird request. You haven't got anything better to do though, bar speaking to Rarity. Meh, that can be done later, assuming she hasn't locked the Boutique up.

You do the only thing you can anymore, and nod. AJ looks excited that you're cool with hanging out. What do ponies do, though?

"Really? Darn tootin'! In that case, follow me. I want to show ya something."

Hmm... only just a week ago you'd have taken a statement like that and taken it out of context, probably accompanied with some form of steamy greentext. You were better than that now. Probably. As you follow in her wake she leads you to the dark, isloated barn. Ok, maybe you're not better than that yet.

-

Heaving the barn door open, Applejack trots cheerfully in. You stand outside feeling a little awkward.

"It's okay, you can come inside!" she smiles.

Oh god why did she say it like that?

Shyly, you enter. Closing the barn door behind you, AJ gives you a little glance before she proceeds to climb up a ladder. Huh, that's a rather interesting feat. Not only had you missed the ladder - which was wall-mounted next to the barn door - the first time you were in here but AJ was climbing UP it, hooves and all. These ponies weren't anything like the feral ones on Earth - they actually did human stuff most of the time.

Shrugging this train of thought off, you continue to follow up the ladder. Steadily placing your feet on the bottom rung and huffing your way to the top, you spot AJ's go out of view as she reaches the roof. When she hears you scrabbling up she turns round showing a content smile, finally gazing upwards.

"Look." she says simply. You oblige.

The night was in full bloom, the stars out celebrating in a frenzy. Your mouth falls open in sheer wonderment, the sight of billions of stars twinkling over the dark, velvet sky was absolutely phenomenal. Living in a light-polluted city all your life had completely stripped you of this joy, something you were now deeply regretting.

"Magnificent, huh?" AJ boasts, turning a smug face to you. As cheesy as sounded, it really was nothing less.

"This is where I like to wind down after a day of work. The silent night, staring up at the sky. Princess Luna really does make a beautiful night."

-

For an hour or so you both lie there on the barn roof, simply gazing at the sky. Applejack keeps having short, silly one-way conversations which leaves you wondering if she ever feels lonely being on this farm most of the time. Surely not, when she has 5 fantastic mare friends?

Though the night sky had distracted you from it briefly, your stomach's constant cramping from attempts to digest itself made it impossible to relax fully. Sitting up, you eye the apple pie you'd brought with you. You seriously considering just plowing into it then and there, giving up on everything. Honestly the pie looked so inviting at this point you could practically shag it. Yet, you just can't bring yourself to eat it.

"I kind of envy ya, in a way." Applejack voices. You turn round, taking your mind off pie.

"I understand that you've been removed from your life; maybe might have a rough few months ahead, yet..."

She goes silent.

What was she going to say? You watch her, her eyes reflecting the night's stars.

"...Sometimes I wish I could get a fresh start like you. Have no more worries about life, be someone else. Away from all this, ya know?"

This wasn't the attitude you'd have expected from Applejack. She was usually all about being bold, honest and brave-to-the-point-of-stubbornness. The Applejack speaking currently sounded somber, defeated, maybe even regretful.

Having no voice had never hurt more until that point. You long to say some comforting words, yet you can't.

"When I was younger, I tried to leave. I went to the city to live with my aunt and uncle. It didn't last, and before long I was back here" she begins.

-

AJ tells you about her youth; about being full of ambition when young, born to be free. In contrast, she was now eternally chained to this Apple farm. It's a rather long-winded tale, and you begin to wonder A: How long has she held this all in? B: Why was she telling you?

It only gets more depressing, delving into details about feeling inferior to her friends. She hates being an earth pony, feeling envious of Rainbow Dash's wings and Twilight's magic. Heck, even jealous of Pinkie Pie's goofy reality-defying stunts. Her talk ends with her admitting she'll never amount to anything, never getting away from here. She's made peace with it, though.

Well, shit. How do you react to that? Despite AJ spilling her guts, there's no tears. Not from what you see under the moonlit sky anyway.

Surging with emotion, you can only give AJ a pitiful look. She returns it, her green eyes look positively gigantic in the dark.

"You know, I still don't know your real name. You'll need to tell me sometime" AJ grins.

This tiny bit of personal interest makes your heart fly. No one yet had asked for your true name, and you were beginning to take it personally. You are a person, but they didn't didn't it that way. Screw being called "Poster this, Poster that".

As you smile, AJ's ears lower a little bit.

"I-I'm sorry I let that all out, I lost myself for a moment." she frets. "I just don't feel any social inhibition when talking to you, voice or not. You remind me of... him."

Was this headed where you thought it was?

-

No, it wasn't. As she says it, Applejack seems to pull herself out of sorrow. Changing the subject, she turns to you.

"It's getting late, Poster buddy, maybe it's time ya'll headed home. Don't want to worry Rarity after yesterday n' all."

There's no force in her words, but you don't feel like disagreeing. Your hunger - which had been kept at bay by sympathy - was rattling your stomach again. You scoop up the pie just in case, starting to descend the ladder.

In silence AJ walks you down to the gate. There was a hint of atmosphere radiating from her, as if annoyed with herself. If you could, you'd inquire, but being the silent weirdo you were now you couldn't really ask what was wrong so you just turn a blind eye.

"Thanks for coming by, you're welcome here at any time. I hope my moanin' doesn't scare ya off, we always have odd-jobs going if you get bored!" she chirps.

Yeah, you'll return. This afternoon was a thrill, even if you were totally dehydrated and sticky from sweat.

Waving silent back to AJ, you head back to the Carousel Boutique, pie in hand.

The night air was still, the stars trying to outshine the moon that light up the empty streets. Back on Earth walking around after dark  would be like signing a death warrant. Here> Safety was a prominent, reassuring feeling. It seems that Equestria does have its own advantages after-all.

With the Carousel Boutique coming into view, you groan. The lights were still on which seems to imply that Rarity was still kicking about. If by will or not, you'd soon find out.

-

Chapter 7

The Get Chapter 7 -

Standing outside the Boutique's door, hesitation was beginning to rise though you. With no idea as to why, you firmly remind yourself that you're a free individual who can do what they want. Right? Still, it'd be nice to avoid more drama today.

Eventually you decide to take the tactical approach of sneaking in - Rarity might already be asleep and not notice this late arrival. Would be win-win, you get to avoid her, she gets to avoid you.

Placing a tender hand on the door (the other clutching the apple pie), you slowly begin to push open the door with as little force as physically possible. To your utter dismay, just as the door creaks open revealing the Boutique's interior, the shop bell overhead tinkles. Balls, you had completely forgot about that.

As you freeze in place at the sound, the door is now ajar. Heart pounding hard for 10 seconds, no one shows up. Maybe you got away with this?

Throwing caution to the wind you slip inside, turning around to silently close the door.

"So you gracefully decide to show up?" comes a voice from behind your back.

Here we go.

Slowly swiveling on the spot, you turn to see Rarity. She's sitting at the table in the kitchen area, dressed in her gown drinking a hot mug of something.

Just play it cool.

You walk into the kitchen, depositing the pie on the worktop. Next thing you know, your head is under the sink tap gulping as much water as you can manage. Thirst is unbearable.

-

Rarity gives a rather bemused look at the sudden tap-gargling. Dignity lost, you just keep on gulping down mouthfuls of fresh, cool water. Lesson learned from this experience: Don't attempt dehydration.

Liquid now sloshing around inside you, the excess gulped air escapes in a rather wet burp. That felt amazing, so full of water you don't feel hungry anymore.

"Have... have you not eaten since this morning?" Rarity's concern seems to outshine her grumpy exterior.

You shrug.

"You're an absolute mess" she says disapprovingly, eyeing up the mud on your clothes, ruffled hair and rather grubby skin.

Sounds like she was starting to arm the cannons. Sure enough,

"And what time to do call this? Some of us have a bed to go to and a business to run! I can't lockup until you're in."

So she wanted to yell at you again? Okay. Ready to take it full on, you sit down at the table looking at her directly.

Her resolve falters as she looks at you.

"You smell rather iffy too" she weakly accuses. You just laugh silently. Now that you were indoors and face-to-face, it was hard to feel intimidated or scared, especially after a rather somber evening with Applejack.

She seemed to be trying too hard to get fired up and upset at you. The whole reason there was a rift between you both in the first place was because Rarity stormed off earlier. You don't see why you should take the blame for anything.

-

There's silence at the table as you stubbornly sit opposite each other. Taking a sip from her hot chocolate, Rarity tries desperately to find something else to complain about.

"I decided that since you were off doing your own thing I'd finish off those curtains you were taking so long to do."

You weren't sure how you felt about that. You were actually kind of looking forward to going back and finishing it together after the disastrous first attempt. Though if she just went ahead and did it... Why did she have to be so matter-of-fact about it?

As you can't respond to any of this, you just give Rarity a defeated look. Even if she was just fishing for a reaction, what could you do at this point in time?

The silence rings loudly in your ears. Feeling lost on what to do, and with the awkwardness making you both feel uneasy, you firmly stand up and decide to head to the shower - might as well do something useful.

At your receding back, Rarity calls.

"That's it?"

That's it? What was she expecting?

With another shrug, you give her a look of contempt. She doesn't like that at all, scrunching up her face. Time for tears?

"Okay, okay! Fine. I admit it. I'm jealous." she blurts out.

This catches you by surprise - Jealous of what? Spending time with AJ? You don't get it.

"You're my responsibility and guest here, and I just want to make sure that your time is sufficient!" she fires up.

-

This attitude completely contrasted with every single thing Rarity had said at the beginning of last week, where she had been almost always ill-tempered towards you. You guess that after learning about the challenges approaching in the coming month - alongside all the various acts of drama - she was feeling sympathetic.

You hover in the middle of the kitchen, not sure if you can leave yet or if she still had more to say. She lets out a sigh, and continues.

"Ah, look. It's because Applejack has already done the whole mentoring thing. She won't discuss it with anyone, and it just rubs me the wrong way that now it's my turn to mentor she's trying to get involved."

Seems like Rarity believed that AJ was forcing you to visit Apple Acres, when that wasn't the case at all. Wires were being crossed, and you had to put a stop to it.

You approach Rarity, and just as you raise a hand to pat her head, she backs away.

"No! No dirty hooves please!" she begs looking at your blackened hands.

With a deliberate eye-roll, you give her a smile. She returns a rather sheepish one as you head upstairs to get cleaned up.

The shower was as euphoric as ever. The steamy water caressed your form as you gently scrubbed dirt out from the worst places, including the new 'under-boob' area. Gotta learn proper feminine hygiene at some point, you suppose.

Bumbling out of the bathroom draped in a towel, you're accosted by Rarity. She's hovering a comb and scissors, her expression menacing.

-

You look at her, seeing a majestic gleam in her eye as she stares at your head. Oh no.

The rest of that night was spent struggling against Rarity. After begging and pleading from both sides, you finally give up - You really could use the cut, after all.

It's the wee hours of the morning, but that doesn't seem to distract Rarity a bit. Now that she's combed your freshly laundered hair flat, she begins to focus her efforts on planning a style. You sit there passively, succumbing to weakness from lack of proper food.

As Rarity begins combing and snipping, she reassures you how fantastic and dashing you'll look at the end of it. Barely listening, sleep steadily begins to dominate your mind. Your eyelids keep drooping beyond any control, brain zoning out and not listening to a single word spoken.

A little voice at the back of your head protests, telling you that if you go to sleep you're just dooming yourself to more changes. You understand the concern but as you try to struggle the grooming of your head just felt too good. Rarity certainly knows what she's doing as the scissors expertly snip around your ears.

You don't know how much longer the styling and grooming continues as you doze off on the chair. Your last thoughts were about apple pie, as your stomach burns with excess acid.

Waking up later, it's already the next day. It seems Rarity couldn't move you, so instead put a blanket around you. You feel your head, hair short again. It's a refreshing feeling.

-

The next 3 days promptly fly by. Still voiceless, you learn to cope with it by creating a routine: Morning sewing with Rarity; Afternoon tea at Twilight's; Hard working until evening at AJ's; finished off with some board games with Rarity (Turns out she really loves playing Manepoly - though is too generous for her own good.)

Keeping yourself busy was the best solution - You forget your sorrows and just try to embrace life for what it now is, all the while bonding with your new friends.

Applejack seems to have cheered up from the depression she displayed on your first work night. Annoyingly, she has begun to treat you like a helpless invalid due to being mute. She knew that it really wasn't the case, but still smiled slyly when you waved your arms in protest.

Twilight was slowly starting to grow on you, too. While she still acted 'know-it-all' and remained awkward, she did know some interesting facts about Equestria. Her library was filled with some of the most fascinating books, allowing you to borrow them whenever you wanted to try distract your mind. Distract it from hunger.

Yeah, despite all this busyness, you were still limiting meals to an absolute minimum. Drinking and sleep were essential, otherwise you'd make yourself seriously ill. Hell, you already felt permanently exhausted, but you didn't really feel like bringing it to anyone's attention.

For each day passed, you couldn't deny the steadily growing fear. Each day was a day closer to your demise.

-

Reaching the end of another tiring day, you're comfortably sitting with Rarity playing an intense game of Manepoly. It was essentially identical to the Monopoly you knew back on Earth, but with locations like Manehatten and Fillydephia. Rarity was a terrible player, but her reactions of pure excitement at dice rolls were pretty cute. You enjoyed this bonding, feeling much more emotionally stable this week than you had previously.

With the usual silent good-night wave to Rarity, you scuff up the stairs. Body aching with each step, you couldn't help feeling pleased with yourself. Maybe you could survive in Equestria after all, if you just keep yourself busy. That's what humans like doing: being productive. Even sewing was less of a bore if you chatted away to Rarity.

Snuggled warmly into the futon, you try to have deep philosophical conversations with yourself. It's just not happening anymore. Could you finally be accepting this all? You dwell on these thoughts, mind slowly fogging over.

You're at Apple Acres, and it's another sweltering day with AJ and Big Mac. For some reason, you seem to be taken with the latter. You can't explain why, but you can't stop looking at him. He's so much bigger than you remember, you barely reach his chest. He's so muscular, you just want to...

You jerk awake. Where the fuck did that dream come from?

Ignoring it, you turn over before feeling a rather unfamiliar leaking sensation. Idly scratching your crotch, you're greeted with a red ooze.

-

Mind still groggy in the darkness, you pause. Something seems to be stuck to your thigh, but with Rarity's new curtains installed there's no light helping you identify what. Being too difficult to see anything, you rub the sticky spot on your leg slightly being greeted by a semi-clotted wetness. Huh...

Sitting up now, you bring your hand to your face. The room is too dim to really see what the source of the mess was, but you see that whatever you've smeared has darkened your hand. Rather cautiously, you take a sniff. Well it's not what you thought it was, but is that... blood? Did you hurt yourself?

With your clean hand, you gently pull back a curtain to let moonlight fill the little area below the window. Immediately you see crimson spots littered on the lilac futon sheets, also covering your PJs and hand. Out of sudden horror, your eyes hastily scan the ceiling to make sure there wasn't any dripping mutilated corpses above you. The darkness mixed with hunger and exhaustion was playing cruel tricks on your mind.

After ruling out hallucinations, you start to get pretty concerned. What hell was bleeding? Relying on your senses in the darkness, you tune into your brain to see if anything feels wrong. Fingers feel fine, toes feel fine, legs and arms feel fine, and yet... during all this movement there was something you couldn't feel flopping around.

At this, the true nature of the situation suddenly clicks in your mind.

-

Oh no, oh please no.

Squirming frantically you wiggle out of your PJ bottoms which, under the moonlight, were stained rather heavily. With a shaking hand, you desperately rub the full area of your crotch. It's totally flat. The area that your member once occupied was now empty. This is very bad.

In panic you fiercely try to flex the muscles in that area which you've known for so, so long. While you can imagine the movement in your brain, there's no connection. You're not contracting anything there anymore.

Trembling all over now, your breathing starts coming in short busts as alarm and confusion begins to cloud your mind. You must find the source of bleeding, just... to make sure. Maybe something bit your dick off in the night.

Slowly lowering your hand into your inner thighs, your fingertips meet a sticky slipperiness instantly identifying where the blood had come from. It makes you feel absolutely nauseated. You're a guy! Guy's don't... don't... menstruate...

Thinking that causes you to let out a disgusted squeak. Now this catches you off-guard, and rather foolishly you clasp a bloody hand to your mouth. Ignoring the fine mess you were making, you try clearing your throat. It seems like the ol' larynx was back from its vacation, but had lost a few pounds in the process.

Distracted, you try humming in your throat. It doesn't feel right, seemly unable to reach the right level of bass. Timidly, you speak out loud:

"I'm a guy-"

Hands fly to your throat.

-

That certainly wasn't the voice of a guy, hell it wasn't a voice you recognized period. Period?

Your mind reels back to the situation at hand. What were you going to do? You can't sleep in this mess, it's just too foul to even consider. There's no spare PJs to change into though, and you weren't sure if you'd ever be able to clean the blood out of the futon sheets.

There's nothing else for it, you need to go to the bathroom. Recalling your rather petty knowledge of female biology, doesn't this whole thing last around 5 days? Fuck. Why couldn't you just become the pony to avoid this humiliation?

Putting a tender hand between your thighs, you get up and awkwardly waddle out of the room - You don't want to make more mess. Brushing your hand over that area caused goosebumps, though not the good kind.

Tumbling into the bathroom, you quickly bolt the door. You have no idea what time it is, but the last thing you need is a concerned Rarity - That'd just amplify this embarrassing situation tenfold.

With proper lighting, you glance at yourself in the mirror. Ever since the ghastly sighting of the 'tattoo' on your hips, you had avoided your reflection as much as physically possible, not even admiring the haircut Rarity had given you. It was all fueled by the rather weak mentality of "What you can't see won't hurt you."

Well now it was hurting you in full force. It wasn't you looking back in the mirror - It was a slightly skinny girl with your eyes and facial features.

-

Internally you shout yourself down - you're a guy! It's impossible for you to be anything else. While turning the shower on to heat up, you stand in bask of your reflection. The harsh truth was that you weren't looking like a guy anymore, but rather a weak-kneed, completely lost female.

Peeling your eyes away from this dismal sight and clambering into the shower, it's time to refresh yourself. The mess that you'd unwillingly made was beginning to congeal in a nasty manner and being a person who slept on their back you weren't used to having fluids drip through your butt. Ugh, you shudder just thinking about what girls put up with.

Cleaning off your thighs was an easy affair. In fact, it drew your attention to the lack of hair there. By nature you were always rather hairy, shedding into your carpet and keyboard back home - much to other's disgust. Now though, your skin was smooth and silky. In spite of yourself, you can't help admiring your legs.

Perhaps the thigh wash was going on a bit longer than necessary, but you weren't sure you were quite ready to deal with... 'that' yet. Being the male you were, you were obviously attracted to female anatomy, but seeing it on yourself though was a completely different experience. You -could- probably grow to like it, but rationally you shouldn't really want that.

Detaching the shower-head, you shamefully spread your legs. This will thoroughly clean that area, right?

-

It was dawning on you that you were pretty useless at feminine hygiene, though that's to be expected really. Awkwardly averting your eyes, you turn the shower-head towards your newly formed privates.

Bracing slightly, the jet of water hits you. You give a little gasp as you experience a rather unexpected tickling sensation. It crosses your mind that you were doing the stereotypical shower-head-to-vag scenario you'd seen before in those questionable hentai comics, though it wasn't really a sexual experience, just... pleasant. Hmm maybe it'd be a good idea to get your mind out of this grim path.

With the last of the pink-colored water gone, you step out. Quickly drying up, you had to endure the next problem - What to wear? Supposing you could revert to home-made boxers and digging out that old dressing gown, you unlock the bathroom door just as a nagging feeling finally gets through to your brain - You need to pee.

At least, you think you did. It didn't feel the same as it did as a guy, and more worryingly you don't think you can really hold it for longer. With a shorter urethra comes great consequence. You cave, not wanting to make another spectacular mess.

Rarity's toilet gleams at you as you approach, almost in a mocking manner. Taking your usual standing position, the obvious dawns on you - You can't really pee standing anymore. This sudden disabling of an ability you took for granted hit you much harder than you'd have liked to admit.

-

Face beginning to flush for reasons you could only describe as deep shame, you sit down. This was your life now. Peeing sitting down. All due to a shitpost on a fucking imageboard. You bury your face in your hands ruffling your hair in frustration. This was -so- fucked up.

Finishing your business, you stand feeling alienated. You take a few wads of toilet paper, as you guess you need something to stop the red river. Just thinking about it makes the back of your neck prickle.

Embracing the cold hallway, you quickly slide into the darkness that is your room. Hitting the light, you start searching for some clothes that aren't white. Black. Gotta be black. To your dismay, all of the boxers Rarity had made were white. Fuck.

Deciding to bite the bullet, you grab a pair, step into them, and awkwardly place the toilet paper in the middle. This will never work, but it's the best solution you can do for the middle of the night. As for the ruined futon...

You glance over to your sleeping corner-turned-blood-cacoon, not really wanting to go back to it. You'd inadvertently ruined it with your stupid girl body. Whipping on the dressing gown that really was too big for you now, you slowly slink to the floor trying sit in a suitable position.

Well, there was one advantage to having this new female anatomy - Now you don't need to readjust yourself when you cross your legs. It's such a weird feeling, nothing there to get crushed anymore.

So... was all that emotion last week PMS? Now that's awkward, you think to yourself.

-

The reality of it all was starting to close in on you, causing your chest to clench. The shock was delayed, but now it was taking a firm hold of your imagination. You sat there contemplating what life would be like from this point onward; new possibilities dancing in your mind. For example, you could now bear children, fully equipped for being a mother. The very concept of this is absolutely terrifying, yet if you really are a girl, it's entirely conceivable. This quickly turned into sour thoughts - one day you'll become an wrinkly old lady, just like your grandma. It was too nasty to even start imagining.

Abruptly, without even processing what you were doing, you suddenly yank at your breasts trying to remove them. This joke has gone on long enough, time to get all this shit off. It fails, so you start scratching at your smooth skin as your beasts throb painfully for a few moments. You weren't sure if they were already feeling swollen or if you'd just caused it to happen. Attacking your hair next - which was much lighter shade than your usual brown - a pitiful yelp escapes your lips. The noise causes a surge of rage and remorse at how stupid and childish you sounded; it was like your prepubescentm, 12-year-old voice had been restored.

The frantic movement of the mini freak-out dislodges a small red leak from your ever-loving vulva, making you stop dead. Hasty short breaths escape you, only adding insult to injury by sounding identical to an amateur porn video

-

Cupping your crotch so the leak didn't escape, you lie back against the wall panting and shivering - despite being wrapped in the cozy dressing gown. Slowly your eyes wander, and you can't stop them as they rest on your rather flat-looking pubis. This is some fuck right here you think to yourself, placing a cold hand on the smooth firm area as if double-checking this was all really happening. You hand brushes the flat surface, before curving down, down... further than it physically should. For your whole life this area was barricaded proudly by your junk, but now it just keeps on curving all the way around...

You stop, realizing that you were essentially groping yourself in the crotch. The male section of your brain burns with curiosity, longing to explore. Yet, you feel hesitant about poking around at the moment in case another ungodly mess of blood unleashes and you get caught red-handed.

What a wonderful gift: nature's way of saying you can finally create a family is by spewing uterus lining all over your bed. You absentmindedly rub your lower gut, trying to dislodge a strange feeling inside. It felt like you had a case of trapped gas, but it was feeling more... dull?

A gargle distracts you, apparently your stomach's attempt at whining. Well, it's clear to you now that near-starvation didn't help slow this transformation down at all, so might as well go stuff your face. What's the worst that could happen?

-

Silently, you tip-toe down the stairs with the gown trailing behind you. First port of call: Fridge. As you steadily walk across the kitchen, you try and distract your mind from the blatant lack of obstruction between your legs as they brushed together. It's feels so weird not carrying that little bit of extra weight around anymore...

Stopping your hand from idly groping yourself again, you wrench open the fridge to be greeted by the dinky light. A quick stock check sets your mind on fire. Hot damn, you'd completely forgotten about that apple pie Applejack gave you! Time to fuckin' demolish that shit. There's eggs here too, and fruit and juice! The delicious waft of food was going straight to your head; you were totally ravenous and slightly drooling.

Quickly checking the clock, it's 4am. You pause, frowning. You can't have been asleep for more than 6 hours, and yet you were sure you were still male when you'd snuggled into bed. Trying not to imagine what the forming of female genitalia would have looked like in real time, you crack two eggs to start making an omelette. You wince slightly, saying a silent prayer for your now departed testicles.

Pouring out some fresh fruit juice and prepping the apple pie for eating, you felt exhaustion ebb away. The vapors of the meal-to-come had restarted your engine.

Although making a mini-feast at 4am probably wasn't the wisest move, you didn't care about anything anymore. You had a vagina; everything else was invalid.

-

Sizzling up the delicious smelling omelette and practically cramming it whole down your eager throat, you gag at trying to eat something proper again. Your stomach doesn't expect a sudden delivery this late (or early), dangerously bubbling as the omelette squishes its way down. While this was incredibly stupid, fuck it! You deserved food, you could have kids now!

Faulty and flawed reasoning aside, you completely lose yourself. Days of agonizing hunger had summoned a ferocious demon inside you which could not be tamed; apparently having a massive fetish for food. With the omelette already destroyed, the apple pie welcomes you with it's shiny foil base. Without even considering using a spoon or fork, you boldly plant your hands into the pie scooping handfuls into your face in the utmost disgusting fashion imaginable. It was so glorious that you even started tearing up. God this pie is just so good you loved everything about it and you adored AJ for giving it to you and and and...

Ignoring the positively alarming feminine gasps and gulps which were escaping you, you relentlessly continued murdering the pie. The only pauses were for hearty swigs of juice, getting the glass covered in pie-hands.

After days of disuse, your stomach goes into over-drive. Feeling utterly bloated, you weakly take a seat at the table resting your head in your hands. Pie was essentially everywhere now, so who cares if it got into your hair? Fuck it, you might as well lick your hands clean.

-

And you do. Your sticky, soiled hands tremble as you softly lick your palms, beginning to service each finger one by one into your mouth. This felt so wrong, and yet, you couldn't stop. The golden gel of the pie was literally the tastiest thing you'd ever had the pleasure of eating in your life. Whether this was due to actual quality of the product or the sudden delirious cravings in your brain, you had no clue. All that was important was that it didn't waste a drop.

As you unwillingly let out little moans of approval, the kitchen light abruptly flicks on. Your heart stops dead; your body instantly paralyzed. With your ring finger still stuffed greedily into your mouth, eyes wide in shock, you slowly swivel round in your seat to face the source. Rarity was standing there, with the look of utmost revulsion on her face.

There'd never ever been a silence more uncomfortable than that one, and you'd experienced -a lot- of uncomfortable silences these past 2 weeks. Rarity doesn't seem to be processing any new information, her facial expression frozen as she stares into space, head tilted with eyelid twitching.

Heart thumping, mind racing, you start to panic. The food had completely overpowered you, now realizing the whole table, your face, hair and gown were covered in apple pie. As you swiftly remove the finger out of your mouth with a little pop, you're about to call out to Rarity before - she swoons to the ground, fainting gracefully.

-

Well this a pretty weird situation. Was Rarity joking around, or did she literally faint at the sight of you fiendishly devouring pie? Obviously the first - Rarity doesn't know what a joke is.

With a light sigh you rise from the table - You were enjoying that feast, why couldn't it last a bit longer? Though you suppose it'd be a bit unfitting to leave Rarity slumped on the floor like this. Briefly rinsing your hands in the sink, you head to the foot of the stairs to see the helpless pony.

So what's the best way to aid a faint victim? In fact, what's the recovery position for ponies? Shit, you were useless at this. In all fairness, your best efforts weren't being reflected after she disturbed you. Plus, knowing Rarity, she'd be roused in a few seconds and continue screaming again.

Kneeling down, you poke Rarity in the side. She doesn't budge, so for Plan B you lightly shake her quietly saying her name.

"Rarity... hey, Rarity..." you mumble, trying to ignore the pitch of your unfamiliar voice.

After a minute, there's a stir - Rarity groggily opens her eye. Just as you welcome her to the land of the living, she lets out a scream. Fucking called it.

Leaping up onto her hooves and frantically scanning the darkness, she then gives you an exasperated look.

"Did you see them!?" she demands, giant eyes focused on you. "Oh of course, you've got not voice. I'm sorry my Dear, I keep forgetting."

With the shame of your new voice fresh in your mind, you don't correct her.

-

Oddly, Rarity gives you a quick hug with her foreleg. You don't fight it, rather clumsily patting the back of her neck. You may have shrank a few inches during your time in Equestia but she was still a little pony, barely taller than your legs.

"Oh thank heavens you're safe! Are you hurt? I heard it all from upstairs," she begins, "I was having the most terrifying, foul dream before I was rudely awoken by banging and clattering downstairs. In my haste, I ignored it simply assuming it'd be you." She gives you a timid look "I know you've been dieting quite hard for the past few days so thought I'd turn a blind eye to your midnight snacking."

Pfft, is that really what she believed?

"But then..." she continues, her face falling dramatically, "The NOISES!"

At her emphasis on the last word, you give her bemused look. You were interested to see where this was going though.

"Oh it was dreadful! I could hear the most revolting and barbaric noises imaginable! Snarling, gagging! It was so obvious that a pack of Timberwolves had broken into the Boutique and were attacking you, I panicked!"

Normally you'd laugh, but Rarity's breathing is close to hyperventilation-level, making you uneasy. Kneeling down, you give her a proper hug around the neck which she accepts softly.

"When I cantered out of bed I checked your room, but the futon was empty with just BLOOD! My worst fears were confirmed!"

Now your face falls dramatically - You weren't ready to explain that shit yet.

-

There's a pause while Rarity steels herself, calming down and catching her breath. You're at a loss at what to do; maybe playing this off as a Timberwolf attack would be the more favorable explanation, despite it making no sense. Rarity seemed to be confusing her dream with reality but you weren't going to argue with it. It was better than admitting you were literally hand-shoving pie into your mouth a few minutes ago.

"When I came downstairs I could see movement in the dark." Rarity starts up again, her voice full of fear. "I was petrified at what I might see; and after descending the last step, reaching for the light... it got all too much. Next I know, you're being a brave dear and checking on me." She smiles softly.

So she didn't actually see you at the table? Thank God. Celestia. Whomever it may concern. You might just keep your dignity after all.

Yawning, Rarity rubs her face with a little snuffle. You glance at the clock, realizing it's now 5am. No wonder she's acting all weird and tired. With a pout, Rarity flumps her rear onto the floor, giving you a rather groveling look. Her massive eyes sparkle in the dim kitchen light, exaggerating her pathetic demeanor.

"Can you fetch ittle-bittle Rarity a glass of water pweeeese?" she coos in a rather sickening mock-baby voice. You nod.

Hastily grabbing a glass out of the cupboard, your still-damp hand fails to grip. Overshooting the re-grab, you accidentally knock the glass flying.

"Fuck" you blurt out.

-

You hand flies to your mouth faster than the glass hurdles to the ground; the latter shattering brilliantly on impact. The sound of breaking glass echos through the room, seemingly amplified by the tiled floor. That'd certainly wake the house, if they weren't all up.

Cringing at the agonizing noise, you slowly cast your gaze down to the glittering fragments of glass. How could you have fucked up 3 things at once? And so badly, at that? Swearing in front of Rarity again, revealing your stupid voice and destroying her property.

With a grimace, feeling pure woe, you turn around. Rarity's once large shining eyes had now constricted considerably, her stare fixated on you. Her expression slackens. What was going through her mind?

"...Did you just speak?" comes her eventual steady voice. There's no emotion conveyed.

Hand still firmly over your lips, you nod slowly.

"Can you speak for me again?" she asks.

No, you didn't want to. This high voice wasn't you, and it really made your toes curl thinking you were stuck with it. Internally it sounds like you are permanently exhaling helium.

"Please?" she half-begs.

No, you shake your head. No way.

Rarity's begging gets more assertive, beginning to frustrate you to all hell. It was like being asked to sing on the spot to a song you barely knew.

With one last nag, you cave.

"Please Rarity, stop begging me." you whine. You embrace for her retort.

"Oh my Dear..." Rarity gasps looking awe-struck, "Your voice is beautiful!"

-

You don't know how to take this compliment. Initially it makes your skin crawl; this is wasn't your voice at all! Yet a small part of you feels flattered by Rarity's words.

"R-really?" you ask seeking reassurance. The swearing incident was apparently going unnoticed for now.

"Oh yes, I do! You sound so... elegant. Like a true lady!" Rarity beams as you, "Much nicer than, forgive me, that dull male grumble you had before."

Ouch, that was a rather low blow. Little point in getting upset over it now, though.

Carefully collecting a new glass, you fill it with water and promptly pass it to Rarity. As she accepts it via her horn's magic she eyes you up.

"So are you quite alright? What's happened to your voice? And what was the source of that blood?" she inquires with a nervous look.

You pause at this question, not sure if you wanted to answer it truthfully.

"I-I don't know... " you lie eventually. You knew exactly what was up, you were fully female now. However, saying this out loud to another person was too much - As if permanently confirming your fate. Besides, it was an awkward experience for you on a social level; how do you explain to another female that you suddenly became their gender?

As your voice tails off listlessly, Rarity sits rubbing her chin with her eyes still focused on you.

"You know, that gown really is frightfully loose on you now, isn't it? Let me find my measuring tape."

-

"Look Rarity", you interject as she starts searching for her trusty tape, "it's the middle of the night. I'm tired, you're practically sleepwalking, what say we head to bed?"

She doesn't respond, immersed in a world of her own.

Cautiously you step back trying not to impale your feet on broken glass. As always, it was too early to put up with this crap. It feels like it's been years since you last had a proper night's sleep, and while your eyes burned and stomach cramped, it looked like you weren't going to get a full rest today either.

"We're both already up so we might as well embrace the day. Now please be a sweetheart and stay still..." Rarity instructs, measuring tape now floating menacingly.

"Can we at least clean this glass up?" you say weakly in an attempt to distract her. Rarity effortlessly brushes the chunks of glass aside with magic, and with a slight jingle the mess is gently deposited into the bin. So much for that.

Before you get a chance to run, your dressing gown is whipped off by Rarity's magic exposing your bare chest. Without really thinking about it, you cover up your breasts to prevent any indecency. Strange, this wasn't an issue before...

"Don't cross your arms like that! I need to measure your arm length and chest width" comes Rarity's stern voice. She's seemingly oblivious to human modesty.

"Rarity please..." you start to pathetically whine, before she pulls your arms apart with another glow of magic. Fucking unicorns.

-

"Stop being stubborn dear, it's very unfitting for a lady." she starts up, stubbornly pressing cold tape to your skin.

"But I'm not a lady! I'm a man!" you retort.

"A man you say? But men don't have such luscious hips as these now, do they?" Rarity says with a sly smile. "If hooman anatomy is anything like pony anatomy, you'll be able to make some big strong foals."

"Human, Rarity, HU-man! And what do you mean..." you say, heart sinking at her words. Look down, you hadn't really felt a difference in your hips while wearing elastic-fitting boxers. Now that you were thinking about it though... Shit. They WERE wider. Idly you rub your hand over the left-side, feeling the new curve. Why hadn't you noticed earlier in the bathroom? Suppose there were more immediate distractions.

"Now don't start moving again!" Rarity protests at you wandering arm, "I'm still taking measurements!"

Just as a fresh surge of emotion causes you to inadvertently clench your fist on your hip, a swift force of glittering blue tries to move your hand. As a result, the boxers are pulled slightly revealing the tip of "20".

Eyes quickly darting to Rarity, it's clear she saw that. Her measuring tape hangs idle before flopping to the ground.

"What in the world is THAT?" she exclaims.

"It's nothing" you quickly mumble. It dawns on you that you were yet to discuss that mark with anyone, having lost your voice the night after it appeared.

"It certainly doesn't look like nothing!"

-

Frantically trying to keep out of her reach, magic once again grabs you. Still showing no concerns for your modesty, Rarity pulls down one side of your boxers revealing the bold "20M" situated on your hip.

"Is this a normal thing for your kind to have?" she begins asking, a rather disdainful look on her face.

Futilely struggling against her magic's grip, you give up. You don't want to accidentally cause the boxers to rip or slip down further.

"No, it's not." you pant slightly, "It only appeared about a week ago." There'd be little point in hiding the truth now.

"Does it... hurt?" Rarity's face was now right next to your hip, you could feel her breath on your skin.

"No, it doesn't. Can we just ignore it please?" The awkwardness was getting to you. You didn't want anyone near that area at the moment.

"Such an odd marking... 20M? What does that even mean? Is this Poster lingo?"

"It... probably means Twenty million..." you resign.

"20 million whats?" Rarity asks, her curiosity reaching a peak.

"Posts", you sigh, "At least, I assume. You won't understand, and I don't want to explain it right now."

Rarity's eyebrow raises, her sly smile returning.

"You know what it looks like to me, dear?" she teases.

Oh boy, here it comes.

"It looks like someone's got their cutie mark! You've finally become of age. We'll need to host a cute-ceañera for you."

That's the last thing you need; more attention on things you want to ignore.

-

Rarity laughs at your reaction to the very idea of having a cute-ceañera.

"I'm only joking, dear. I know you don't want any more attention than you already attract."

Her understanding calms you down, you were getting weary of more staring. With the cold beginning to bite, you successfully escape the clutches of magic and grab your dressing gown, wrapping it around yourself.

"On that note," Rarity grins, "How would you like me to make some silky lingerie? I make plenty for ponies, so designing for you shouldn't be too hard. It would be an interesting challenge, actually. Wonder I could make it emphasize you hips?"

"No." you say flatly. "No way in hell."

Joking or not, Rarity had expected this answer. She rolled her eyes.

"Oh come now, what's the problem? You're a lady now, might as well embrace it."

These ponies aren't on your wavelength at all; taking your transformation as trivial as if you were shy over a bad haircut. They had no true understanding of the turmoil inside you at losing your masculinity.

"Now that I'm awake I might as well crack on with some designs. Once I get an idea I just need to finish it. What are your plans?" Rarity asks, batting her eyelashes at you in a kind way.

Rubbing your stomach, you think maybe the next best thing to do would be visiting the bathroom. Eating loads of solid food in a frenzy didn't seem to be going down too well, especially after fasting for the past few days.

"...I'm going to head back to sleep." you lie.

-

"Back to sleep? You mean you're actually going to lie in those filthy sheets?" Rarity protests.

You frown, forgetting the state you left them in.

"How did your sheets even get like that if you're not hurt?"

These types of questions would be great to avoid right now.

"Nose bleed." you make up.

"A nose bleed? And how did that happen? Did you hit yourself?" Rarity's raised eyebrow only confirms that she doesn't believe you.

"No. When you have fingers," you wiggle them at her, "sometime's one needs to... scratch one's nose from the inside." You really wanted to say you were mining for nuggets in there, but you couldn't seem to bring yourself to. Thankfully this explanation was enough to convince Rarity.

"Eww. You scratched the inside of your nose with your... things, and managed to make it bleed?"

"Yeah, well, I have sharp nails." This statement stood true, as you certainly hadn't been keeping your nails in check. Why would you? Ponies don't have nails, and nail clippers don't exist here.

With a look of disappointment, Rarity warns you that such crude acts are unbefitting for a lady. Now you're the one rolling their eyes.

"Lucky for you I have the perfect spell to dislodge blood from fabric. I swear, if I didn't already have a cutie mark for finding gems, it'd be for cleaning stains."

"And why do know how to remove blood?" you ask faking a suspicious look.

"Never you mind!" Rarity flusters up. You can't help giggle. Ugh, your giggle sounds stupid.

-

Proceeding back up the stairs to your room with Rarity in-tow, she gracefully casts a spell on your sheets. Blue light shines brightly from her horn giving life to the dim walls. Right before your eyes the blood disintegrates leaving nothing but an eerie glitter. It reminds you of the spell Celestia had cast on your arrival night to deal with your 'welcoming gift'. Your heart pangs, if only you knew back then what was going to happen to you.

"Thanks" comes your dead tone. You were sadly used to ponies cleaning up after you by this point.

"Not at all," Rarity coos, "Try get some rest. You still look quite pale."

"I will. Also... thanks for accepting my new voice." It's a rather lame statement, but you can't ignore the intense self-awareness every time you spoke. You needed to know if you could still be taken seriously with this alien tone.

Rarity smiles, "Honestly, I do like it a lot. I feel more connected to you now than I have been for the past 2 weeks."

At this, you blush. You don't know why, but you can't help it. Does Rarity now consider you a friend?

"G'night. Well, morning," you say, "See you in a few hours."

As the door closes and darkness floods the room, your gut gives a rather painful gurgle. Boy did you regret stuffing your face so early in the morning.

Rubbing your lower stomach, the cramping reaches critical point. The sudden rushing of a shit-tsunami was upon you, and you need to dash to the bathroom. Now. Was this related to your cycle? How do girls cope?!

-

Chapter 1

-The Get Chapter 1-

It's a dark, cold night with the wind going full-force against your windows. The rain endlessly rattles off the glass, occasionally being blown forcefully with a strong gust. You sit inside though, cosy and warm at your PC not giving a shit about outside. There's excitement in the air, and you hate yourself for it. You can't lie to yourself though, you're hyped. Tonight's the night of the 20 mil Get.

It's stupid, really. Getting so worked up over repeating digits. They hold no real significance, just an excuse to get fired up and post absolute garbage. It's already started, you can feel the traffic on the board begin to pick. Joining on this shit-post parade, you spent most of your time randomly dumping images until slowly the gap closes to 5000 posts. The board is now going mental, and refreshing the catalog only just proves how frantically threads are being bumped. In a shameful, sad way, you wanted to be the one to secure the 20 mil post. Why though? It's not really an achievement, and no one will really remember you for it. In a odd way, is it attention-seeking? To do something that makes others react?

You pause for a moment, closing your eyes and leaning back in your chair. You have a short reminisce about the time you've wasted on this silly board, and how nice it'd be if you could just get your small 15 minutes of fame without doing anything requiring effort.

Wouldn't that be good?

-

With a sigh, you slowly escape your reverie. Over-analyzing the motivation behind a Get won't help anything, besides, surely it's over by now? You start mashing F5 like there's no tomorrow. What's the gap now? Shit, only 100 posts left. Your stomach lurches. Why is this suddenly so important to you?

Assuming all is lost and feeling mildly ashamed of the creeping disappointment of missing the Get, you halfheartedly upload an image of Rarity with the text simple text "Best pone". It's quickly lost in a flood of nonsensical posts. The board is being pumped so hard with traffic right now, and the stormy weather definitely isn't helping things. Your old friend F5 is now just returning a white page, forever displaying the loading spinner. Giving up, you close the tab and decide to get ready for bed.

Walking through the hallway to the bathroom is a cold journey. The wind has been sneaking up through the wooden flooring, silently leaking through the cracks. You hate this rickety bungalow, only ever staying in your room because it's the only part that can contain constant, glorious heat. The Bathroom is no exception, with the icy tiles chilling and nipping away at your feet. Looking in the mirror while brushing, you begin to feel ashamed again for wanting a stupid post number so badly. You look at yourself directly in the eyes, wondering. While not toned or particularly active, you're not really fat. Just average build. Pretty tall though, with run-of-the-mill brown eyes. Can you improve?

Pitiful. Spitting the toothpaste with perhaps a little more force then necessary, you feel internally defeated and just want to stop thinking. Clicking the bathroom light off before being baptized by chilly winds again, you return to your room.

-

You retake the chair by falling with your full weight, cursing the needless desire to re-browse the board. You've been gone for like 2 seconds, what could possibly have changed?

Now sitting half-naked in your PJs you mumble as your fingers automatically type "mlp" into the web address bar. It's still slow loading, but actual images are appearing now. Sure enough, a quick scroll shows that every post is roughly "HOLY SHIT >>2000000020000000", derailing every thread imaginable. You smile. It's frowned upon, but you love the shitstorms people create over events like this. Might as well see who got the Get. If you recall correctly, Octavia got 15 mil, Vinyl got the 10 mil. You click on one of the many cross-thread links.

Still being rather slow, the page begins to load in blocks, constantly scrolling all up the screen causing you to fight with it. After about 20 seconds of this, you finally see the blue-wall that is replies to >>2000000020000000.

And holy shit. It's Rarity. Accompanied by the text "Best pone".

Your ears begin to ring and you flush with color. Laughter bursts out your chest. You actually did it. You had acquired repeating digits. Your shame is subdued over the triumph of rousing every poster. The shitposting is maximum.

This feeling of pride - while really unfounded - truly feels fantastic. Without a moment to lose, you try to form a reply post to your Get. Why? Because you wanted to add more fuel to this full-out shitstorm.

However, when entering the post, all stops. Everything is cast into darkness.

-

The oddest feeling begins. The physical world dissolved, and suddenly you feel suspended, even floating, while still - you believed - sitting in your chair. Slowly, the surrounding air begins to compress around you making your hair to lie flat against your skull and causing your ears to protest with extremely uncomfortable popping.

The fear begins to set. This is a suffocating, drowning experience, yet breathing itself doesn't actually seem to be a problem. The looming darkness that is now your captor feels like it's beginning to squeeze further, threatening a claustrophobic reaction. Highly alarmed and on the verge of shouting and screaming, you pathetically flail against nothing thrashing as hard as you can. This only reveals that the darkness is getting ruthlessly denser, as if submerged in cruel waters that prosper on panic. Eyes now wide open, darting frantically for the tiniest hint of light or, hell, any stimulus that makes sense of this situation. Nothing. You are totally blind, detached from any sense beyond crushing darkness. Okay, struggling to breathe now, this is a problem. Wildly you come to the conclusion that breathing in the darkness has caused your lungs to collapse. None of the precious air you desperately try to suck up is getting anywhere, only causing a horrible constricted feeling against your ribs. What's happening?

Suddenly, a new sensation shocks you.

-

The feeling of colliding with something that's both resistant and spongy reels your mind back to a semi-rational plain. It feels too insanely massive to just be a coincidental collision. The illusion of safety is instantly shattered though, as you are pushed further into this strange force. Is this some kind of "end" to the darkness? Is this dying? You don't understand anything, and can't keep your rational composure any longer. This needs to end. Your lungs are beginning to burn fiercely, and you can feel the relentless torrent of blood pumping through you throbbing painfully in your neck. Even your heart is scared shitless as it bangs around. Screwing your face up you try to scream again. No sound; no breath escapes. You are now choking and suffocating as this thick, spongy membrane absorbs you. Once in its grasp, you know escape is impossible.

Breaking point, as stress begins taking its toll on body and mind. Vomiting might have been an appropriate option once, but nothing can escape in this vacuum. It could only be described as being trapped in a sealed plastic bag, with someone sucking all the air out; completely trapped in the peristalsis of darkness. Struggling did nothing. Screaming did nothing. Nothing mattered anymore. You wanted it to end.

Just as it got too much - it ended. You seem to break through the tight rubber-tube experience. Next thing you know, you're coming back to consciousnesses on cold white & grey tiles in a brightly-lit environment.

-

You lie face-down, eyes closed, enduring the harsh string of cold tiles emanating through your chest. However, before another thought manages to squeeze through your battered head, you need to barf. Badly. No time to react or escape to a suitable place, as it quickly creeps up before getting intolerable. You feebly push yourself up, pointing down just as the torrent of spew gracefully flows. It hits the ground with a rather impressive smacking sound.

You pause for a moment, making sure there wasn't going to be an encore. Sharp prickling begins to dominate your throat. Satisfied that your stomach is empty, you roll over - avoiding the fresh pile - panting for air, forcing your eyes shut. You feel absolutely awful. Pale, sweaty and shaking quite visibly, lying in your bathroom next to your gut-juice. Did you have a rough night? It's all so unclear now. Were you even drinking at all? God it's freezing.

You can hear the nearby 'plip-plop' of - you assume - the dripping bath tap, your mind drowning it out with a puny attempt to understand what you'd just experienced. Darkness and compression. Did you fall asleep in the bath and drown? Sure feels like it. Nothing rational could explain. So many questions. No answers. Your breathing slows down, making it abundantly clear that the dripping tap has gotten louder. Actually, beyond that and your beating heart, there is no sound here at all. Wasn't it storming outside? In fact, why is this place so brig-

"Hello there, Poster!"

-

Head spinning, you open bleary eyes that are pierced by a harsh light. Rubbing them gently, you make out the blurry outline of someone standing over you. A rather large someone.

Fuck. Did your mom just find you piss-ass drunk, collapsed in your bathroom next to some vomit? This was toe-curling-tier humiliation. Rather thickly, you call out

"Whadd'd you call me, moms?"

You hear a rather royal chortle before a patient throat-clearing. The plip-plopping stops.

As the world slowly comes into focus you can now clearly see a white figure staring down at you with wings spread in an embracing manner. Gradually, you realize it wasn't drips making the 'plip-plop' sound, but rather it was the 'clip-clop' of... someone walking over to greet you.

Your Heart slams against your ribs. Eyes practically popping, jaw agape, stomach fluttering, you bolt up-right. How was this even possible?

"I called you Poster, my subject." she says again with a soothing voice, though a small smile breaks the corners of her mouth. "It is how we address those who have traveled here in a similar manner to you."

"Similar to me?" you sheepishly repeat. This was great, just fuckin' brilliant. Here you sit on these freezing tiles, overcoming the ills of a ferocious fever. You've been sick, your brain beaten and bruised, you're half-naked in only your PJ bottoms shivering, all the while next to the colorful mess you've made. Only to be found by none other than Princess Celestia.

-

What the hell was going on? Princess Celestia isn't real, yet the contradicting truth is slap-bang right in front of you, looking at you with what could only be described as sympathy.

"Judging by your attire and accompanying mess, it's not completely irrational to conclude you were unaware of the significance of a milestone post? Then again, none have been." she chortles. Internally you feel a scornful rise at being treated like an idiot while in such an fragile state - no less by a cartoon equine. You find your voice, though it's trembling with emotion.

"You're not real."

Celestia's smile is no longer concealed, but instead grows across her face. Not in a cruel way, but in a rather patronizing one. It's as if you'd just stated that 2+2=5. She's probably heard that she doesn't exist countless times.

"Why can't I be real, Poster?" she asks, as though having a friendly debate about the weather. "I'm living, breathing, speaking and walking, am I not?" a knowing smile now prominent on her face. She was clearly quite enjoying herself.

You pause, trying to think of a flawless reply to the debate. However only the words "cause ur a faggot" come to your exhausted mind. Not the best rebuttal, you decide. Was there any way to appear less pathetic in this situation? Nothing is coming to mind. You hopelessly look up at the fantastically white alicorn, her flowing, multi-toned mane sailing out behind her. Time for a quick change of subject.

"Why... why did you call me here? Where am I?"

-

The answer to the 2nd question was obvious - you were in Canterlot Castle, and not your bathroom floor as previously believed. You only wished your bathroom had this amazingly high roof with beautifully clear stained-glass windows.

"I'll tell you all in due time, Poster. Are you able to stand at the moment?" she coos down, making your face flush an even brighter red.

Can you stand? Maybe. Legs are shaky but you're over most of shock now with the biting cold being the biggest issue. Maybe if you refuse, it'll destroy this dream.

You remain sitting, looking up at Celestia. After a few moments of silence she closes her eyes, still smiling. Her gentle expression told you this wasn't this first time someone had refused to comply. Just as you attempt to speak, suddenly you're pulled up into the air by a unseen force quickly identified as Celestia's magic. She carefully places you upright on your feet which make a soft slapping noise as they meet the floor. More magic flows from her horn to deal with your 'arrival present' puddle. It sparkles for a few seconds before disappearing.

"Not the worst accident we've had, you'll be happy to hear." Celestia says comfortingly. "The 2nd Poster's arrival left quite a few stains." This attempt at small talk was unbearable at this present moment. You have an internal struggle of questions and anguish. What was going on? Why weren't you at home? And most of all, how do you return?

You decide to walk and talk with Celestia.

-

Opening your mouth to speak, only chattering mumbles escape your throat due to the cold penetrating your very bones. The tiled floor, paired with the grand stone walls, don't keep in much heat. Sure, you're used to your cold rickety bungalow but this was too much. Currently the only real heat source is your burning face, but that doesn't properly warm you. You suppose Celestia doesn't mind this low temperature because of her fine, pure white coat. Wait, Celestia...?

Taking a proper look, there's no mistake. From eye-level, she's perhaps a bit shorter than you, but her horn reaches above your head. Same deep amethyst eyes and flowing multi-colored mane you'd expect. There's a unique radiance about her, and without thinking you extend a finger to poke her nose. She looks bemused. Sure enough, she's solid. This only adds to your collective worries. Celestia's little snort at being approached this way was pretty cute, and before you can stop yourself, you hug her neck. God, sweet, soft warmth. Politely, but perhaps not unreasonably, she uses magic to drag you away with a small chuckle.

"Well that's the first time a Poster's done that. Then again, most of them were fully dressed. Here, let me help you with the cold."

Out of seemingly nowhere, a fluffy white dressing gown flops on your head. You eagerly put it on, embracing its warmth. It has that fresh out-of-dryer heat and was honestly the most welcoming thing in the world at that moment.

"That's from Rarity. She made it for you."

-

"How did she...?" you begin, ignoring the fact that Rarity is apparently real now too. Not answering, Celestia turns away and starts trotting off. Hastily following her, you jog a few steps to catch up to her right-side. She casts an eye on you, and in a gesture of good will, extends one of her gracious wings behind your shoulders before addressing you again.

"I can tell you have many questions, and I can completely understand. Before explaining anything, I want to show you something first," she smiles, continuing to watch you with interest. "If you believe what I said earlier, you are not the first of your kind to arrive here. There have been 3 others in this position."

"Where are they now?" you find the courage to ask, tugging the luxuriously snug dressing gown closer to your freezing form.

Another cheeky smile. The kind that indicates no straight answer, and sure enough...

"Later. For now, I want to take you to one of our castle's most secret rooms. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised."

Moving around made it clear that Canterlot castle really was magnificent. The hall in which you'd arrived - and barfed - in was decorated with hundreds of tapestries, each one detailing wonderful stories about the Sun and Moon. The lush, royal red carpet you found your toes caressing was a welcome change from the hard-tiled floor.

After a few minutes of silently following Celestia and walking through immense corridors and spacious landings, she folds her wing back and stops in front of a large, decrepit oak door.

-

"Through this door is something that will aid my explanation of why you are here. Are you ready?" Celestia asked, still smiling but sounding slightly more business-like now.

The honest answer was no, you weren't ready. For any of this. Didn't seem like there was much choice in the matter now though, and you felt resigned.

"Sure, yeah" you half-whisper. Freaking out wasn't really on your to-do list but it was still possible if these nasty surprises keep up.

Acknowledging your consent Celestia bows her head, pressing her horn into what looked like a dark knot in the wood. Immediately the old door began glowing with an unbelievable gold-tinted sparkle before vaporizing silently in a gust of glitter. You admit to yourself that magic is actually pretty awesome. You follow Celestia through the now door-less doorway trying not to inhale any golden magic dust on your way past. The door leads into an odd, circular room which could only be a tower.

Celestia's trotting stops and she tuns to face you with a raised eyebrow. You blink at her, then following her gaze, slowly look up. There's a stained glass window there which depicts a few ponies standing above blue rectangle boxes. Hell, you could even name them. Applejack, Vinyl Scratch, Octavia and Rarity. Seems like a rather odd mix of Ponies...

Oh shit. Oh SHIT.

You made the impossible, inconceivable, preposterous connection.

"These... aren't 'Get post' ponies... are they?" you gasp, dreading the answer.

The white alicorn nods, beaming.

-

Her voice seemingly full of praise, Celestia gives you a respectful look.

"I must say, I'm surprised you got it in just one guess. It took our first Poster several tries until I eventually took pity on the poor soul." Her sly smile appears again.

Only semi-listening, your knees give, and you fall flat on your ass staring in awe at the bewildering stained-glass window depicting Gets. You suppress manic laughter at how something so grand could come from shitposting. Repeating digits shitposting at that. This surely is the weirdest dream you've ever had. More than those failed lucid pony dreams.

Giving you a moment to collect yourself from this utterly bizarre revelation, the familiar polite-throat clearing brings you back to the circular room.

"As you've correctly deducted, this window shows the accomplishments of the Posters - as to say, your kind." Celestia pauses, with those amethyst eyes still warmly on you. She carries on, "For every 5 million posts, one of your kind is sent here as a reward. Eternal freedom from the mundane life as a Poster, living here in care-free Equestria instead."

This seemed strange. Your mind races back to all those 'Anon in Equestria' threads you read that had a similar premise. You gulp.

"Have I died?" you ask rather bluntly.

Sympathy fills Celestia's face again, but her slow answer reassures you.

"No, you're not dead. Quite the opposite, actually. Here in Equestria, you will be reborn."

This was getting too weird.

-

"What do you mean reborn?" you reply inquisitively. In response, Celestia just gives another smug know-it-all smile.

Getting peeved at how much information she was withholding, and due to your backside getting numb from sitting on the hard floor, and you scramble up to your feet. You understand that Celestia wants you to learn but this information-starving was really getting too much. How did shitposting get you here? Where are the other Posters? What did she mean by "reborn"? When can you go home?

Looking again at the glorious shitpost window and at the silhouette of Rarity at the top, a great feeling of turmoil storms inside you. Enough of this shit. You fire your questions like bullets directly at Celestia trying to get proper answers.

"How do I get back home?" Shot number 1.

"There is no known way, I'm afraid." Shot deflected back, piercing your heart.

Already wounded deeply, you try shot number 2: "Why me?"

"You wanted this post, did you not?" Another rebounding shot, piercing your chest.

"H-how will I ever fit in with all the ponies here?" Feeble third fired.

Celestia pauses this time, as if contemplating something big. Slowly her eyes close, clearly lost thought. 20 agonizing seconds later she opens them again, seemingly shrugging off her train of thought with a simple reply.

"That's the purpose of the mentor."

"M-mentor?" you awkwardly echo like a fool.

"Yes, mentor. Rarity will be your mentor. You chose her, after all."

What?

-

You glance down at the godly white fluffy gown that was given to you earlier. Had Rarity really made this just for you? Did this 20 mil Get shitpost actually intertwine your fates? Why where you going along with this utterly retarded idiocy?

You address Celestia, speaking rather abruptly for once; manners be damned

"So you believe that since I secured the 20 million milestone post on an image board, I'm now entitled to a life in Equestria? With no regard to my own life or future plans?"

"Need I remind you, Poster, that this was your cho-" she begins but you sharply cut across her. "Sure, I wanted it, but it was supposed to be a MEANINGLESS POST on a website. Not to change my life in such a drastic way!"

Celestia's smile fades. She doesn't really appear to be angry but there's now a little bit of finality in her words.

"I do not believe, I know. This is your fate, Poster. Willingly or unwillingly. Now come along."

She trots rather briskly out of the tower, leaving the shitpost stained-glass window behind. You follow quickly, not wanting to get locked in.

As the door is magically re-sealed with the same golden haze, you hate yourself for admitting it, but Celestia was actually somewhat intimidating.

Trying to not rub her the wrong way you ask where you're heading now. Much to your relief she doesn't seem upset.

"I'm taking you to your room for the night. You need rest, and I need to let Luna take over for her night watch."

You guess bed would be nice.

-

Chapter 4

The Get Chapter 4 -

At Twilight's words you slump back onto the wooden floor, lying flat. Outstretching your arms, you stare up at the library's ceiling not knowing what to feel right now. Dash who is sitting beside you casts a rather concerned look, before Rarity pipes up

"But Twilight, how can you know that for certain? This digestion what-not."

Twilight is silent for a moment, in which only the soft sleeping hoots of Owlicious are audible.

"Well it's just a theory I suppose, but I believe there's a rather large element of truth in there too. I mean, Mr. Poster's mane looks slightly different then when he first arrived."

Rarity quickly interjects "But that could just be related to what he eats! Or how he dries his hair. Have you seen how these Posters live?"

"But that doesn't explain the odd coloration, Rarity." Twilight adds in an impatient voice "Unless you've been slipping dye into the food it just doesn't add up."

"But how can he become a female, Twi? He's a boy!" Dash adds in, looking lost. "Even if he was changing, why would it be to into something he's not?"

"Haven't you been listening, Dash?" Twilight accuses, her tone becoming impatient. "I said that our world is breaking him down into something that can -logically exist here-."

There was something in that line of reasoning that didn't click with you. Why would becoming female be more logical for this world? Unless...

Sitting up again, you hesitantly address Twilight.

"Am I going to become a... mare?"

-

Losing your gender was scary enough, but your species as well?

"Correct!" announces an excited Twilight, like you'd just answered a simple quiz question.

At this revelation, all eyes in the room slowly look towards to you. Dash looks half-freaked out, half-disgusted. Rarity just looks stunned.

"Him? Become one of US? That's just so... WRONG!" Dash blurts out, your feelings be damned. You hastily shuffle away from her. "I mean, why not a stallion? That'd make some sense at least!"

"She has a point" you think to yourself, not wanting to open your mouth right now. Who knows what might come out.

"That's easily answered" Twilight says sagely. "It likely correlates to the amount of Earth-based particles available at the time of entering our world. If I recall Mr. Poster, you arrived naked?"

"N-not... naked" you mumble finally. "I had my PJ shorts on..."

"Exactly!" Twilight excitedly exclaims, clapping her fore-hooves. "I think you were the first Poster to be nearly devoid of clothes, meaning there are much less Earth-based particles available during the digesting progress. This lack of extra particles will need to be compensated by a smaller form, and likely as a result, a mare's form."

This doesn't make any sense.

"So he's being digested RIGHT now?" Rarity speaks up, "What if we go get him some more of these Earth particles? Would that change anything?"

"Oh Rarity, that'd be impossible. There's absolutely no way to get more as we're not on Earth."

-

"When I was brought to Equestria..." you voice up, "I went through this terrifying crushing darkness, then what felt like a dense spongy wall. Is that related to this?"

"Ooh that sounds like inter-dimensional travel! That has EVERYTHING to do with this!" Twilight practically squees. Her interest in the science/magic of this whole affair instead of the detrimental affect it was going to have on your life was rather irksome.

You spend the rest of the afternoon in silence as Twilight rambles on about inter-dimensional travel, magic-based life and how books always had the answer. Dash had left shortly after the revelations of your fate. Rarity was helping Spike clean up the piles of books because her 'intrusion' was to blame. You could tell she wanted to leave you alone though, and for that you were thankful.

Twilight eventually stops talking as evening falls. It's pretty late, and she offers for both you and Rarity to join her at dinner. Thankfully Rarity politely declines.

"I appreciate the offer dear, but we should be heading back. We need to feed Opalescence."

You didn't want to stay any longer, and before you know it Twilight and Spike are seeing you out the door.

"Good luck Mr. Poster! If you have any worries, you know where I am" Twilight calls. Next to her, you see Spike chuckling to himself. Smug wee prick was happy at the news his "opponent" for Rarity would no longer be a problem. As Twilight turns round, you quickly flip Spike the bird. He gets the message.

-

The atmosphere in Rarity's kitchen that night was intoxicating. It was clear that your new fate was still fresh in both minds, but neither one wanted to discuss it; at least not now. You felt dirty. The reaction from Rainbow Dash earlier kept replaying in your head, making you feel like some weird pervert. No way in hell did you want to become a girl! Yet she acted like you had done it on purpose. Sighing, you stand up from the table leaving half your food.

Waving bye to Rarity, you slowly slink up the stairs into your room. It's not that late, but you want to be alone. Lying on your futon - the one thing that was quickly becoming a source of comfort in this weird world - you glance at the broken pony mannequin. You stare, unable to tear your eyes away.

Will you really become that size? It's impossible to imagine what it'd be like to have the body you've lived in for over two decades be completely changed. Rising and placing hands on the mannequin, you feel just how frail and dinky it was. Sure, it was broken, but it was still an accurate representation of size. Was this really going to happen? Tears begin to well up in your eyes.

This rather unprecedented influx of emotion begged another question - Were you changing mentally too? You regret not asking Twilight earlier, but then again, you're sure the answer wouldn't be welcome.

Leaving the mannequin alone and flopping back into the futon, you lay awake for hours. Silent tears fall for who knows how long.

-

Another rooster call, another morning. You raise your face off the pillow which seems to be slightly stuck with congealed tears. Gross.

What were the plans for today? Heck, what were the plans period? Continue sewing forever? It was way too boring to consider. What kind of jobs do ponies do, anyway?

Lost in thought about pony economics and hierarchy, you go for a shower. It's always best to beat Rarity to the bathroom in the morning; it gave her less time to frown upon your poor waking form. Reluctantly checking the mirror, you were surprised by the lack of new visual changes. Maybe now that you were aware of what was happening, the world-digesting was going slower. Well, you hoped anyway.

Putting all your effort into a "speed-shower" and throwing on some homemade clothes, you start hastily preparing breakfast. It's just another big bowl of poorly chopped fruit, reflecting your enthusiasm for the day. There was just no patience in you at all, and making something like an omelette didn't seem worth it. Sitting down, just as you start to munch on a particularly big bit of chopped apple, there's a shrill scream from upstairs. Feeling like you should probably check it out, you hurry upstairs.

"What's up, Rarity? Did you find a spider?" you say upon greeting a dripping Rarity outside the bathroom, towel on her head and dressing gown secured.

"YOU!" she shouts.

Not this shit again.

"What's the matter now?" you sigh. It's way too early to start bickering.

-

"I'll show you the matter!" Rarity retorts indignantly, trotting into the bathroom. You follow, trying to recall if you forgot to flush.

"This!" she whines, brandishing a floating pile of goop right in front of your face with her magic.

"Eww! ...is that hair?" Sure enough, it was a clump of tangled, dark hair. Quickly catching on to the fact it wasn't purple...

"My hair?"

"YOURS!" Rarity shrieks again "Clogging up my drains with your filth!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I don't need my old body hair anymore anyway" you snidely reply, trying your best to guilt-trip. It works, Rarity's face slackens as she deposits the mess neatly into a small waste bin.

"Oh. Well, I suppose... Er, I mean... d'oh, forget it." The awkwardness of the topic seems to derail her rage.

Shrugging at her sudden backing-down, you leave the bathroom promptly before more questions arise. Arriving back at the table with your fruity breakfast, it doesn't take long before you're full up. Strange, you've only eaten about half the bowl, usually you were still hungry even after breakfast. Regardless, you stand up just as Rarity enters the kitchen.

"What are your plans for today then?" you ask rather reluctantly, still sore from being told off.

"Hmph. Today I will be dress designing, perhaps taking a fabric stock-check. I also need to take Opalescence to Fluttershy's..." she tails off slightly, "...and I'll also be discussing with you what Twilight told us yesterday."

"No." you say flatly.

-

"Yes" she asserts, "We need to discuss this... digestion business. Sooner the better."

"No." you repeat. You didn't care what Rarity wanted, it was your choice if you discussed it or not. Frankly you were happy living in semi-denial. Impatiently scrunching your toes in the pink slippers, you try staring Rarity out.

Rarity's face begins to contort, and just before she starts arguing again you announce: "I'm leaving."

Before you know it, you've walked out of the Carousel Boutique. The bell of the shop tinkling behind you, you decide to make a run for it before Rarity tries to stop you. This was insane, but you just need to get away.

Dashing along in your pink slippers wasn't massively comfortable, and the by-standing ponies looked at you with surprise. Still, you'd started, and now you couldn't stop. Why were you being this fucking dramatic? Being around Rarity was rubbing off on you badly.

After a good solid 10 minutes of aimlessly running, you reach the edge of Ponyville. Gasping for breath, you finally become aware of where you are. Horrible realization sets in. Just across the small water bridge in front is the mouth of the Everfree forest. You stop for a minute, looking at the path onwards. Despite it being early morning, the forest was eerily dark. Should you continue on?

Part of you says yes - you're in the universe of a show for little girls, what's the worst that could happen? And yet...

-

Heart pumping wildly, adrenaline coursing through veins, you stand there shaking. One final, dangerous thought goes through your mind: "Fuck it". Just escape Ponyville. Get away from this damned place. Away from Rarity. Away from Twilight and her preposterous theories. This was surely the answer to ending this madness. Emotions were violently going out of control. You need to do -something-. Sprinting over the tiny bridge, you lunge into the forest.

After about 30 minutes of jogging, you exit your trance. Only then do you realize you're completely lost. The sky has been swallowed by towering trees filtering out most daylight. You turn around and try to backtrack, though every direction now leads to an impenetrable wall of tree trunks. Now back in the land of rationality, it was becoming obvious that slippers were an awful choice of footwear, drenched from mud and utterly ruined.

Okay, you admit it to yourself - you've dun goofed. Panic begins to rise in your chest. A world for little girls or not, this forest was foreboding. It's time to get out, and fast.

You search for an exit, ducking under sharp branches and avoiding low-lying roots. You roughly try to follow the path you think you came. It was too dark to see previous footprints, and your feet were beginning to throb from crunching forest debris.

A few hours must have passed before you began to get really desperate. Shouting into the thick darkness won't make a difference, but it didn't stop you trying.

-

Shouting into the darkness did nothing, as you feared. There was absolutely nothing in the forest except exuberant plant life. Fantastic vines coiled around trees like jewelry, abnormally large branches from trees that supported a strange array of leaves.

Deciding to take a break, you sit on what looks like a fallen log in this darkness. It's a bit lumpy and disfigured, but enough to support a 5-minute break. Panting slightly, you take off a rather brown slipper and massage your foot. You can see some blisters forming, accompanied with bits of twig splintered in the skin. What an idiot, flying off the handle like this is not what you're usually like at all. Though you have been through a lot recently...

Home removal, impending change of gender and person... You're still confident this will end though, surely this is just some weird-ass joke. Then again, since arriving here everyone has been so supportive. Celestia, Twilight, Pinkie, Rarity to a degree. Wonder if Rarity is even bothered where you are at the moment?

A sudden twitch underneath your backside breaks your train of thought. Heart and body leaping, you instantly snap out of the self-sorrow reverie, frantically scanning to identify what moved. As you look down, the log happily used for the 5-minute break was looking back. Your heart sinks. That ain't no log, but... Oh God. Why is it here? Is it alone?

You have two second choice - Fight, or flight. Flight it was. You had just pissed off a Timberwolf.

-

Run. Run run fucking run. All drained energy came rushing back as your old ally adrenaline once again came to your aid. Your previous running could best be described as a casual jog compared to this new speed. With hands positioned like you were doing intense karate chops your legs stretched further than you thought possible, damned be your lungs. Escaping is all you can think about.

The confused howls and snarls coming from behind only add fuel to the internal raging fire of fear taking a hold of your chest. It's clear your sudden movements have made the Timberwolf take chase. Shit. How were you going to get out of this situation? Two things were eternally looping in your mind: Don't stop; Don't trip.

Frantically trying to keep your mind on both footwork and branching-dodging, a burning stitch develops in your side. You can't keep keep this running forever, and the Timberwolf is now appearing relentlessness. Oh God. It's much faster than you are, and with the adrenaline being pumped dry from your body your motions slow. You're running out of steam.

In any other circumstance, the amount of ground you've covered in these past 5 minutes would a phenomenal achievement to you. Right now though, you were eternally cursing not working out more. You can't keep going further, the stitch in your chest feels like it might burst and your feet feel like raw meat attached to lead. Soon enough, you fall.

Landing in the dirt, you swivel round to meet glowing green eyes.

-

The rancid breath of the Timberwolf fills your nostrils, the stench of tree bark mixed with severe dog breath. It was absolutely revolting, but you can't turn away. Looking into those empty eye sockets filled with what can only be green glowing spirits, fear reaches critical point. Yelling only seems to anger the Timberwolf, which now has paws on your chest pinning you down.

Swiftly putting your arms under the foul creatures wooden forelegs, you give a huge heave to push it off. It's impossible. What the hell? It feels like there's no strength in your arms, but you've never had this problem before! This is one thing you didn't anticipate with a constantly shrinking physique - the lack of strength you took for granted.

You feel your puny arms bending in, barely able to shift the Timberwolf's weight. Thick, tree sap-like drool begins to leak from the hungry beast's mouth. With a jolt of horror, you see 2 more Timberwolves appear behind your assailant, looking just as menacing.

Pains begin to itch from the skin clamped under the Timberwolf's prickly claws. All 3 glowing, evil faces were closing in, and for the first time in your life you actually believed you could wet yourself from sheer terror. In one last futile attempt to dislodge the Timberwolf, you only manage to get fresh tree sap drooled onto your face and hair. The furthest wolf begins chewing down on one of the deformed slippers.

Giving up the struggle, you lie there. Was this your new fate now?

-

As the lifeless wooden faces met your colorless one, visions of how you'd spent your life came and went. It wasn't glamorous. A life of video games, School, watching TV, doing stupid things at parties, posting hateful things online. Maybe this was for the best. You're useless to everyone. The rollercoaster of emotions was stopping, and you wanted off the ride. The only comfort was closing your eyes.

There's a scrabbling noise, and before you know it, rough-textured teeth sink into your right arm. The following pain doesn't hurt as much as one would expect, barely breaking skin. You yell, not wanting to find out if this was just a testing nibble.

As the surrounding birds flock away from the sudden shout, a new noise is audible. A clanging. What is that? Even the Timberwolves seem distracted, releasing your arm. It only grows louder, and panic rises again. If this strange racket upsets these beasts, what horror awaits? Before you get much time to dwell on it, the source of the clanging is right behind you.

Opening an eye, an orange blur gallops over your head before launching an assault on the Timberwolf holding you captive. Being pushed onto its side makes the Timberwolf snarl, but more clanging makes the pack of wolves decide it's best to scarper.

Sitting up off the ground, you recognize the orange rump in front of you. With pots and pans strapped round her neck, cowgirl hat to boot.

"A-Applejack?" you stammer, before being bucked squarely in the chest.

-

This new assault - while not particularly forceful - still manages to wind you. As you gasp for air, Applejack quickly begins to hogtie you with her lasso.

"You've made a fine mess here, ain't ya?" she says through the rope in her mouth, sounding rather irritated. You stay there in the mud getting your breath back, not bothering to fight.

As AJ finishes tying up the rope, she gives you a quick look. "How badly are ya hurt?"

Your feet were ruined, you had a nice collection of scrapes and cuts from wild branches, not to mention a slight bite mark from a Timberwolf on your arm. Something may or may not have escaped into your underwear too...

"...I'll live." you sulkily reply. "Why did you tie me up?"

"To stop ya'll running away again. You've put everypony into a right panic." AJ's tone was filled with disappointment.

"And how's that your business? You didn't even come to my welcoming party" you retort, squirming against the hogtie.

"It's not. If I'm honest, I don't give a buck about you. However, I care for my friends and I don't like seeing 'em upset, even over something as troublesome as you. Can ya stand up? Flop onto my back and I'll carry y'all."

In half a mind to say "No" and lie in the forest forever, you really wanted to get out. Despite AJ's coldness, you were damn thankful she arrived when she did. Awkwardly sitting up, AJ steps over your legs and you grab hold of her torso. This isn't going to work, you're much heavier than her pony body can carry.

-

After some kerfuffle, you are secured onto the back of Big Mac who was helping AJ search until she dashed off to save you. Proceeding to take you back to Apple Acres, you lie uncomfortably on your front on Big Mac's back. Not only were the ropes digging into your chest, but it was a rather humiliating situation. Trying to take your mind off it, you spring up conversation with Applejack.

"How did you guys find me? I... I was so lost in there. How did you get those beasts to leave?"

Not looking at you, AJ answers the questions rather briskly.

"Rarity raised the alarm early this morning, we said we'd keep an eye out. Out back of our farm is part of the Everfree forest, 'bout 5 minutes ago we saw birds and critters escaping from the tree tops. On investigation, we heard your sorry hide yellin' and bawlin'. You can thank Big Mac for his idea of borrowing the Timberwolf-repelling pots from Granny Smith, by the way."

"T-thanks then Big Mac," you say rather lamely. He just replies with an "Eyup".

Apple Acres is now in sight.

Another mess you've gotten into. Why did you even run off again? Oh right...

"How's Rarity?" you ask tenderly.

"She's been better." AJ replies stiffly. "She doesn't know we've got you yet."

You begin to feel guilt. Rarity was just trying to help you come to terms of what Twilight was talking about, and you flew off the handle. Though the way she treats you...

"Rarity hates me."

-

This bold statement seems to catch AJ's attention. She turns to face you raising an eyebrow.

"And how do ya'll figure that?" she questions, seemingly interested.

Where to begin? You take a deep breath.

"She's constantly telling me off for trivial things, it's like nothing I do pleases her. I realize that I'm just an inconvenience to her, but I don't like being spoken down to all the time. I want my space, and I wish she'd respect that. This has been a rough week for both of us, but it's not fair that she just yells it all out on me!"

AJ lets out a short, harsh laugh.

"Have you seen yerself? You're a mess. You're like a little misbehaving puppy, so no wonder she's ain't happy with ya. If you're always this high-strung, you'll never get on."

As you begin to form a rather irate reply, AJ shushes you. You've now arrived at Apple Acres, and it's certainly quite a big stretch of land. AJ trots ahead, opening the doors to the barn allowing Big Mac to enter. Once inside, you're deposited rather heavily into a pile of hay, still tied up.

"Now just stay there, I'll get the first aid kit. Big Mac - keep an eye on him." AJ orders before exiting he barn.

You turn your eyes to Big Mac. He doesn't seem particularly bothered or upset like his sister, seemingly a pretty chill guy.

"Is there any reason that Applejack is acting so rash towards me?" you pipe up.

Big Mac pauses for a minute, and you're not sure he heard you until finally:

"You probably remind her of Sam."