Shadow, Love and Pride

XXIV

Before the Rooster Crows

“My momma taught me that love making is for a special somepony, not something you do for fun.” Derpy was arguing with Bellz. They were walking back to the station. It was eight thirty at night.

“But it is fun.” Bellz teased. Kido was behind them enjoying the two go at it.

“Love making before marriage is like opening your birthday presents before your birthday. You spoil the surprise and what's special about it.” Derpy argued.

“But come on, you gotta give it a test drive. What if the surprise you get on your honeymoon is a really small package?” Bellz smiled.

“Small package...?” Derpy thought for a second.” Darn it Bellz!” Bellz laughed.

“Hey Boss what do you think?” Bellz looked to Kido. “Sex before marriage wrong or right?”

“I'll be keeping my nose out of this if you don't mind.” Kido answered.

“Ah come on wolfboss.” Derpy pleaded.

“Yeah boss, spill the goods, I dare you.” Bellz challenged.

Kido sighed. “I believe the act of sex is fine as long as it is consensual. And between people of the age of consent.”

“Fuck you boss! That's just the law. What do YOU think?” Bellz asked.

“It is fun I will admit. But after a while it became dull. So now I will only be together with someone I love.” Kido answered.

“Okay... and your preference?”

“The ladies but in the end I would accept love no matter from who.”

“All right... Wait.” Bellz stopped. “What do you mean “in the end” boss?”

“Nothing.” Kido blushed and passed the deputies.

“You been with boys haven't you?” Bellz said excitedly.

Derpy gasped and stopped. “Wolfboss is that true?... Not that I'm judging.”

“We have to hurry and file a preliminary report...” Kido continued.

“FUCK THAT!!! I have to hear this. Now spill!” Bellz demanded and followed her boss, as did Derpy.

“By the Goddess! Fine! I was a teenager. It was sudden. Didn't expect it. I fell in love. Didn't work out. End of story.” Kido blurted out.

“More importantly... who was the girl in the bedroom?” Bellz teased. Her boss blushed even more now. “It was you wasn't it!?”

“Oh by Celestia!” Derpy gasped in surprise.

“FUCK YOU BELLZ!!!” They arrived, Bellz couldn't stop laughing. “We're here so drop it.”

The girls held their laughter but couldn't hold back their smiles. The door opened and they all entered the lobby. Suddenly Bellz stopped smiling. Kido went over to his desk to write. Derpy went upstairs.

“Hey boss can I talk to you?... It's kinda important.” Bellz asked her boss.

“Shoot.”

Bellz didn't sit down but started pacing back and forth in front of Kido's desk. “Boss how do you know if what your doing is the right thing?”

“That's like asking the meaning of life.”

“I'm asking YOU. You seem so at peace with everything. Like you have a certainty about what your doing is the right. I don't have that.” She stopped to think. “Just a month ago I felt revenge for those that locked our kind in Tartarus, killing, hurting, overpowering was right. But now...”

“You're not so sure?”

“When I saved that little filly tonight... I don't know why I did it. I just knew I had to. You said it was the right thing to do. But I technically did do something wrong. I broke protocol and the law in my effort by disobeying the fire fighter and medics.”

“Laws are created in the effort to benefit the many but they don't and can never account for every possible situation.”

“But then what's the right thing to do in difficult situations?”

“Bellz how do you feel right now? Push your doubt aside for a moment and tell me how you feel about your actions tonight.”

Bellz took a deep breath and felt something she never felt before. Her breathing was steady, so was her heartbeat. She felt calm. “I don't know.”

“Bellz, when you kill, when you do things that are wrong you feel excitement, adrenaline. But when you do what's right, when you truly follow your heart... you feel peace.” Kido smiled.

“I think I understand.” She smiled back at her boss. “Boss you're some kind of saint, a Messiah even.”

“My dear I am far from it.” Kido became saddened. “In fact... I am the worst monster I know.”

“Boss you saved this town... from what you've told me, since you escaped you helped ponies from the shadows. You're weird, but I can't imagine anyone more qualified to protect a town and it's inhabitants.” Bellz noticed tears in Kido's good eye. “Boss... what happened?” She sat down. Kido spoke as if he was talking to himself.

“When I was young, actually fifteen, a year before I escaped Tartarus.” He paused to remember. “Let me give you a bit of a back story.”

“Okay”

“Werewolves, the vast majority, are creatures who value power, but my father was different, he became tired of my kinds unhealthy obsession with power, so he taught me and my brothers the values of compassion and empathy. My brothers were more resistant to his teachings but I followed my fathers advice from the beggining and read from the most forgotten libraries. These libraries contained books about philosophy for the most part.”

“That's where you learned about morals and such?” Bellz asked.

“Yes. As a pup of no more than eleven years of age I applied these teachings. Helpings those around me, doing good deeds and so on. My father was ever so proud. But after four years my clan started to take notice and surprisingly, many liked what my father had to say but my mother opposed his teachings.”

“Wait... how did your dad get married to someone who opposed him?”

“My father was the largest and strongest of all the warriors of our clan. By tradition he had to marry the chief's daughter. They weren't really a couple in anyway really.”

“And how did your parents have you. If what you say is true, you should be enormous.”

Kido laughed. “I brought great shame to my family. I am so small and skinny. But my brothers... the youngest was already five feet tall at only age five. But my father taught me to fight, and I bested every challenger I encountered.”

“Wow. Okay go back to the main story.”

“So my mother, took charge as the new chief and realized what was happening concerning my father changing the minds and hearts of the clan with his teachings on compassion. She charged my father and her own three sons with treason. The punishment being death.”

“That's messed up.”

Kido sighed. “It gets worse... my two brothers, my father and I were locked in a cell. The three of us swore we would gladly die by his side. But my father took me aside and said to me. I will never forget his words: ““Before the rooster crows you will kill me three times. But know my love will not fade.”” He was actually smiling as he said this. I grew angry at the thought of him thinking I could kill him, never mind three times, which is impossible.”

Bellz stayed silent.

“It was the morning of our public execution. We were tied down on a fully packed theater in a row, an executioner was holding a silver dagger. My mother gave us, her three children, a chance to live. All we had to do was denounce our fathers teachings and aid in killing him. Simple right?... My two brothers refused, yelling how they will gladly die by my fathers side. BUT I WAS SUCH A COWARD!!!”

Kido punched his desk breaking it in half. Bellz was shocked. Kido continued.

“I cried for mercy and agreed to the terms. I was released and handed a dagger. But now I had to kill my brothers as well... I... I... OH GODDESS!” Kido fell to his knees.

“What happened then?” Bellz asked.

“I started with the little one. He was only eleven at the time. He didn't even yell or curse at me, he just looked sad. I sliced his throat. Then my other brother, he was thirteen. He was silent, pure rage in his eyes. I ended him too...” He couldn't continue.

“Boss you have to let this out.”

“When I came face to face with my father, he wasn't angry... he was smiling. He still loved me, despite what I've done to his children. I don't know what came over me. I fell to my knees in front of him. I took the knife and slashed my right eye in shame. ”

“That's why that scar won't heal.”

“Yes...” He continued. “After I finished cutting off my own eye, I heard a rooster crow. That's when I realized what my father meant the night before. He didn't mean I would literally kill HIM three times. He was referring to how I would kill my brothers and then hurt myself. That was more painful than dying to him.” Kido wiped his eye and continued. “I was looking down in pain and regret. Then my father lifted my head with his muzzle. He was now sad. My father lifted his head, exposing his throat. He wanted me to live... and I did it. I took my fathers life and I lived.” Kido was now on his knees, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders. “My mother, her supporters and her family were so proud.”

“Boss I...” Bellz had no words that could possibly comfort him, but she went to her boss and hugged him.

But just when this moment couldn't get worse for the young werewolf. Derpy and Twilight had overheard the story. Derpy after a shower came downstairs to check on her friends, but heard the pain in her wolfboss's voice and despite knowing it was wrong of her, she stayed and listened.

Twilight had heard about the events on City Hall and wanted to check on her boyfriend, she heard his story from a small opening in the door, peeking inside. She backed up from the door, not knowing what to do with what she just heard. She couldn't do anything else but run back to her home.