Sympathy: A TwiLuna Story

by Giant_Neckbeard

Rating: mature
Tags: Princess Luna, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Romance, Adventure, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia, Alternate Universe, Main 6
Length: 421987

Twiluna Fan(clop?)fic. Twi and Luna magically bound to each other. Gryphons massing at the borders. Chrysalis trying to get back into Equestria. Discord being Discord. Canterlot Nobles trying to tear Princess Twi's authority apart. YAY!

What happens when two of the most powerful entities in Equestria develop a condition towards each other where their magic interacts and causes them some 'unusual' problems and social embarrassment? Hilarity and a great deal of conflict, of course!

Between Luna's awkwardness with the modern world, Twilight's naievety and OCD, Discord trying to be a 'good' friend, Celestia's maternal instincts going into overdrive, the rest of the Mane Six trying to 'help' in their own special ways and the Ponies of Equestria trying to milk the situation for all it's worth, it's going to be a doozy.

A few things to consider: In this setting, Twilight is an immortal Alicorn, as is Cadence. They WILL outlive their friends/spouses without Age spells being thrown into the Mix as referenced by Trixie with her Alicorn Amulet.

Set at the end of Season 3, when Twilight first becomes an Alicorn.

Warnings: Contains Sexual Situations, occasional Gender-Swapping, the dreaded 'Futa' in a few very rare situations, 'cheating', TwilightXLuna, DiscordXCelestia, ChrysalisXShiningXCadence and other relationships that I won't spoil here.

Published 2014-06-18 17:30:05 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-29 15:42:37 UTC

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Despite everything that had occurred during the past three weeks, Celestia's return was quiet and barely noticed, much to the horror of the Castle's staff, as the Eldest Princess teleported herself directly to her chambers in the middle of the night, magically levitated everypony out of her private quarters and didn't appear till two hours later, still dripping wet from a hot shower as she fixed a stern look at the crowd of nervous Guards and staff clustered around her door.

"Bring me Luna and Twilight, immediately." She had supposedly said in a very even and calm, but very firm voice, and the Guards had scrambled to obey.

And so, Luna and Twilight found themselves being gently, politely and respectfully hustled to Princess Celestia's private quarters by grim-faced Guards, with a gaggle of whispering castle-staff following after them.

"Oh, like this isn't going to be in the papers tomorrow. We're doooooooomed!" Twilight groaned their 'escorts' pushed them into the room, and then shut the door so fast both Alicorns nearly lost several tail-hairs as the heavy cherry-wood doors slammed shut behind them.

"Twilight, I fear we may have more pressing matters than the gossip-ponies." Luna muttered, her wings clenched tightly to her barrel in irritation and nervousness. Celestia was supposed to be sharing power with Luna, but now it was obvious who the Ponies truly respected.

Not that Luna locking up the newest Princess for the better part of a week with only 'there was a problem with her studies, she needs solitude to work on them' as an excuse would have done much to make Celestia feel confident about Luna's state of mind.

For her part, Twilight Sparkle could only assume that somehow this was all her fault, that whatever she'd done to offend Luna so much had also offended Princess Celestia.

For several awkward moments, the two Alicorns stared at each other, then their hooves, then at the door they had just been shoved through, unable to find the words to talk to each other, to break through the wall of awkwardness that had built up between them, when the wooden doors to Princess Celestia's study opened silently, the faintly golden glow of the Solar Princess's magic outlining them in the process.

"Luna, Twilight, please come in." Her voice was pleasant but ... firm. Warm and gentle, yet there was an obvious command embedded in those words.

"Ponyfeathers..." Luna and Twilight muttered at the same time, before shakily entering the den of Princess Celestia.

Yet curiously, when they stepped across the threshold, the fur on both the Alicorns stood on end, and both felt static cling to their horns, wings and tails for a brief moment before they passed into the room. The room appeared to have been warded with a spell of some kind, a rather potent one at that.

"Luna, Twilight, on my way back from the Everfree Forest, Spike came to me with news that all was not well in Canterlot." Princess Celestia spoke from behind her desk, one gilded hoof trailing over a series of pieces of yellow paper, folded in half, that Twilight recognised as her letters to her friends, before her 'confinement' had begun. "That Twilight had been the victim of the gossip-ponies of Canterlot, that Twilight was about to start her studies in Dream-Walking .... and then the letters just stopped, no explanation given at all, and despite several attempts, not one of the letter that Twilight's friends sent was ever responded to after that."

Looking up to the ceiling, Princess Celestia gave a deep, heaving sigh and turned her focus to Luna entirely. "Little sister, I trust you, and I love you, but this makes no sense to me. Can you explain to me why you have placed my student under house arrest and blocked her from having any contact with her friends?"

"I did not block any mail going to or from Twilight Sparkle, I assure you, Tia! All I did was forbid Twilight from speaking about the ... incident that made it necessary to isolate Twilight from the Court ... and myself, until you returned." Luna replied, bristling at the implications. "I would never isolate another Pony from her friends, I know full well the pain that such loneliness brings!"

"Your highness, Luna is telling the truth, I wasn't forbidden from sending letters to my friends, just ... Pri ... sorry, Luna, now that Princess Celestia is here, can I please know what I've done to upset you? I don't know what it was that I did, and I hope I didn't hurt you, I just didn't ..." Twilight piped up, then turned to Luna and began to babble nervously.

"I ... was not offended, Twilight, just shocked. It is not something friends do to each other. It startled me, and I was worried that you would think less of me, but it seems you didn't understand just what happened between us that night." The Lunar Princess sighed and awkwardly, nervously held out a fore-hoof, to which Twilight Sparkle eagerly put her own out to touch to, the two Princesses pressing hoof to hoof. "Tia ... I am afraid I cannot teach Twilight Sparkle how to Dream-Walk after all ..."

"But Luna, I thought we could ..." Twilight wailed before Celestia's magic formed a muzzle-shaped shield of golden sun-magic over her mouth.

"Luna, what do you mean you 'cannot' teach Twilight Sparkle? She is an excellent student, of this you know. And what is this 'incident' that has set you two to walking on egg-shells around each other?" Celestia murmured softly, dropping the shield around Twilight's muzzle when she was convinced her former student was in no danger of having a 'Twilight Attack'.

One 'Need it Want it' rampage was quite enough, thank you very much!

"Oooooh, this is so embarrassing ..." Luna blushed, and then began to haltingly spit out the tale, of how both Twilight and herself had been run ragged by the more ambitious Nobles who sought to turn Celestia's absence into a power-play for their own schemes, and in fatigue, the two Alicorns had started to drift off to sleep, their horns still bearing unfocused magic ...

"...A-and then, we s-s-s-sp-sparked each other, Tia!" Luna finished, her face beet red and on the verge of tears from embarrassment. "Right there, in Mother's room, with my first real friend in a thousand years!"

Twilight, sheltered, bookish Twilight, having never heard this term before, turned to ask Celestia just what it meant, when the new Princess did a double-take at her former Mentor's face.

Celestia's jaw appeared to have come unhinged, hanging at an angle under her head, with her eyes wide open and her eyebrows raised up as high as they could go, slouched forwards onto her desk in shock.

"You ... and Twilight ... Sparked?" Princess Celestia whispered in a broken voice, her eyes flicking from Luna to Twilight and back again. "Sparked? Luna ... I knew you and Twilight shared a high degree of magical affinity, but I didn’t think you two were … uhm … compatible in that fashion!"

Twilight Sparkle, for her part, moved from hoof to hoof with nervous energy, terrified she's upset the two Princesses, before finally she could stand it no more, and blurted out "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY SPARKING?"

In the silence that followed, Twilight blushed and found now both Luna and Celesita had turned to her with that same open-mouthed expression of shock.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout, I just don't understand, what do you mean by 'sparking'? Didn't I make a mistake with the Dream-Walking spell? Or was it something to do with being an Alicorn!" Twilight cringed as the two Princesses eyebrows rose even higher. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, for whatever it was I did! I'll go back to Ponyville, and I swear you'll never see or hear from me again!"

Sobbing weakly, ashamed and afraid, Twilight spun back to the door that lead back to the rest of the castle and ran to it, her horn glowing with magic ... and found that no matter how hard she focused her magic, the handles were ... slippery, as if coated with a magical lubricant that prevented her telekinesis spell from gripping them.

Then the room became painfully bright as Celestia’s magic bloomed behind Twilight, coating the room in glowing sunlight from every angle, leaving not a single shadow in its wake for a painful instant of total light.

And then she found herself floating backwards into Celestia's study, unable to fly or run back to the doors at all.

"Alright, before anypony decides to do something drastic ... I have just added a second barrier to my rooms, adding my strength to the warding spell I had cast before you arrived, to block other ponies from listening to us through the walls, or using scrying spells upon these rooms, so what we speak of here shall not leave the room, unless we ourselves speak of it outside them." Celestia sighed, rubbing at her muzzle with one hoof as the other reached into a drawer on her side of the expansive desk and produced a bottle of black-label Apple-family cider. "Now Twilight, and I know this is difficult for you, but please do not panic. We are not going to kick you out of Canterlot, send you back to magic kindergarten, or banish you and lock you away in a prison for something beyond anypony's control. Luna was correct to maintain a certain distance between you two until I returned, because ... well ...."

Taking a deep breath, Celestia turned her full attention to Twilight, plopping the new Alicorn onto the thickly carpeted floor and removing her levitation spell in the process. "What we call 'Sparking' is actually a form of deep magical communion two Unicorns can engage in to share their magic with each other, usually two Unicorns who are emotionally close, or possess a high affinity for similar forms of magic, although there are other, cruder ways to achieve the communion. These days, sadly, the process is used for … sexual stimulation, rather than the original, noble purpose."

"For example, Shining Armor and Princess Cadence were able to 'Spark' together, despite having different magical resonances, due to their high emotional rapport, and it was that Sparking that enabled Shining Armor to recast his Shield-spell using Cadence’s magic, a shield strong enough to drive the Changelings to the borders of Equestria once again." Celestia paused to take a long swig, straight from the bottle, of the black-label cider before continuing. "However, I must say that while I expected you both to have a high magical affinity, what with you both being bearers of the Element of Magic, as well as being Alicorns with Cutie Marks tied to the night sky, I did not expect you to be able to ... 'Spark' just by contact. I suppose we should be lucky that contact was broken almost immediately. Continued contact after Sparking has some ... interesting side-effects."

As Celestia took another swig, both Luna and Twilight flicked a glance towards each other, blushing furiously as their eyes met before finding the patterns in the carpet absolutely fascinating once again, prompting Celestia to sigh and remove two large glass tumblers from a drawer in her desk, filling each generously with the black-label cider and levitating it to both of the other Alicorns. "Drink. I have a feeling it will be a long night before we can work this out."

So that's what the girls at the Academy meant by 'sparks flying'. Ohmigaaaaaaaawsh, that means Luna and I were ... were ... aauuuuuuuu! Twilight screamed internally, holding her glass tumbler in one hoof while she clapped a wing over her face and tried to not to burst into hysterical laughter.

Interesting side-effects? INTERESTING SIDE-EFFECTS? Tia, are you mad? I've had a thousand-year dry spell, I would have shouted all of Canterlot to rubble if we'd .... oooh! For her part, Luna fumed even as a rebellious corner of her mind wondered if the wards woven into the royal quarters would have been able to hold together under such a sonic assault.

It was going to be a long, awkward night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many hours and several trays of sweets later, Luna and Twilight sat on thick, plush cushions on the floor with Celestia, giggling and chatting, much more relaxed thanks to the seemingly endless reserves of ‘special’ cider in Celestia's bottle, discussing the past three weeks of their lives.

"And then ... no, wait, don't say anything, this is the funny part, the Sergeant says 'But we can't find the mother', as he's standing on this big brown rock ... and it’s the Hydra, it's just asleep on the bottom of the river ..." Celestia said in an excited and slightly slurred voice, then burst into laughter again. "And he's getting so worked up he's trotting in place, then the Hydra wakes up and panics, and goes swimming away with the Sergeant clinging to its back, screaming at it to stop 'In the name of Celestia!' "

"Wait wait wait ... isn't Sergeant Stormbrow a pegasus?" Luna chuckled, reaching for the last donut with a hoof, Twilight nibbling on an éclair beside her with wide eyes as she listened to her teacher's story.

"That's the funny part. He could have flown away, but he was so terrified that he forgot he had wings! It was priceless, but I felt so bad for him, so I covered for him in front of his men by praising him for holding on to the Hydra so we could follow it, but the poor stallion could barely walk by the time we managed to track the Hydra to her lair." Celestia chuckled as she finished her story, then stared at the crumb-covered tray and sighed. "I think the kitchen-staff will have a collective fit if we ask for another tray."

"I ... dun' think I can muuuuv ..." Twilight groaned, more than a little drunk and sleepy from all the cider and food, flapping her wings sluggishly for emphasis.

"We've all had a little too much, I admit." Luna added, trying to stand before dropping down to her cushion as her vision swum. "Would it be ... improper to stay the night, Tia? I don't think either Twilight or myself will make it back to our rooms in this state."

Celestia looked from Luna, to the nearly comatose Twilight and back again, smiling warmly.

"Of course, but first ... come here, both of you." Celestia said softly, extending both of her massive white wings to the two tipsy Alicorns. "My sister, my student, I am just happy that you are both safe and sound. We will find a way to make this work, I promise you."

Shakily, both Alicorns came forwards, sharing bashful glances, before Celestia's wings enfolded them both, bringing both Luna and Twilight up against Celestia's shoulders and neck in a hug.

For Luna, it was both a blessing and forgiveness, all rolled up in one, to be embraced like this. Celestia meant the world to her, and Luna's only memory of their long-vanished mother was being held as a tiny foal in just such an embrace.

For Twilight, it was a dream come true, to be enfolded in white wings and forgiven by the Pony she respected most in the whole world, a fondest wish from her childhood realised.

When Celestia stepped back from the embrace, both Luna and Twilight took a half step towards her, unwilling to break the contact before sheepishly glancing at each other, and then Celestia, who was looking at a space between and behind them in puzzlement.

"Now ... how did you get in here?" Celestia asked in puzzlement, and in a panic at being caught in such an intimate display, both Luna and Twilight turned their heads to see who the Solar Princess was talking to ...

Luna turned her head left, and Twilight turned hers right, both of them looking at the space that Celestia had been staring at, and in their tipsy state, did not notice how close they were to each other, or the angle of their horns.

"Tia, there is no-pony the-eeeiiihh!"

"Princess, whu' are yo-oooooh!"

Clack!

Celestia stood there, trying desperately not to smile, as the two Alicorns stood there, faces rigid with shock and mouths open in surprise as the tips of their horns touched.

Squeaking and round-eyed, both Twilight and Luna stared at the point of contact as arcs of purple and blue-black lighting snapped back and forth between their horns for several seconds before the alcohol, the 'sparking' and shock proved too much for them to handle, the ponies collapsing down onto the carpet in a tangle of legs, inarticulately squeaking mouths, quivering wings and still-touching horns.

"Gotcha ..." The Solar Princess tittered drunkenly as the two Alicorns twitched together in unconsciousness on the thick carpet of her study.

Of course, when she couldn't pull them apart, that was when Celestia decided that now would be a good time to panic ...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Twilight could not believe how warm she was. It felt like ages since she was last so ... gloriously warm. The bed was so soft and fluffy, the covers were just the right mixture of weight and 'poofy-ness' required for maximum comfort, and Luna was just so snuggly.

..... wait .....

All the warmth and happiness leeched right out of Twilight Sparkle as her brain finally caught up with the rest of her, realising that the source of this wonderful warmth was the Lunar Princess she was entangled with ... in Princess Celestia's bed!

Now shocked awake, she could remember every embarrassing moment of the night before, when she had over-reacted and thought Celestia and Luna hated her, when Celestia had explained what 'Sparking' was, and then ... and then ...

There'd been a lot of drinking, a lot of the Royal Kitchen's finest sweets and pastries, then ... then Celestia had tricked both Luna and herself into touching horns again, and then they had ... oh no!

I just want to find a deep dark hole and crawl down into it for the next hundred years! That was completely different from the last time! Twilight closed her eyes and mentally cringed, remembering how the feeling of this latest 'Clack' incident had been very ... pleasant compared to last time. She had been numbed by fatigue and alcohol and good food, but the feelings had been … had been...

The ... need to be perfect, so Princess Celestia would never find fault with her had been a driving force in Twilight Sparkle's life, driving her to study endlessly, to not 'waste' her life on frivolous things like friends, fashion or material items. But it wasn't as if her books didn't dip their hooves into ... darker waters, from time to time.

And the feeling she had experienced that moment when Luna and herself had crossed horns for a second time had made her very aware of the fact she was a young mare in her prime. And the connection with Luna had allowed Twilight to feel that despite being thousands of years old, Luna's body was in much the same predicament.

And now, they were wrapped in each other’s wings, in Celestia's bed of all places, snuggled up like two kittens with their horns still joined by ... something ... that let them flex slightly against each other. Twilight couldn't turn her head to look without drawing her muzzle closer to Luna's right now, and that would be a recipe for disaster ...

She was also trying very, very hard not to think about the sensations that were insistently making themselves known with every motion as the smooth, blood- and nerve-rich skin that covered the horns known as velvet rubbed against each other.

Blushing furiously as she tried to think cold, dry thoughts, Twilight started to run down a mental checklist of actions she could take that would not result in Luna waking up and the situation deteriorating further ... and came up with precious little.

She could not withdraw her wings, because Luna was laying on top of one of Twilight's own wings, Luna's fore-legs had wrapped themselves tightly around the barrel of Twilight's body, and there was of course whatever was holding their horns together.

Okay, calm ... calm, I am calm, there is still a way out of this. Twilight told herself, running through a list of possible spells that could work. Teleporting blindly was out of the question, especially with the entangled situation and her own Alicorn powers randomly spiking. She might teleport them into a wall, or burn them both with uncontrolled magical energy, or transpose both herself and Luna over each other during the re-materialising phase of the teleportation spell ...

Luna was one of her friends. But spending eternity fighting each other for control over a nightmarish, mish-mashed body was not something that Twilight was looking forwards to …

Perhaps a quick scrying spell, to see just what was binding their horns together? A small spell, just enough to get a glimpse would surely not be too jarring in their position.

Twilight gathered the magic from the core of her being, wondering why her magic reserves were all but exhausted, and fed the tiniest trace of that power into the spell she had in mind, funnelling it up and out of her horn ...

And just as the spell reached the very tip of her horn ... it was gone, sucked into Luna's own horn like a drop of water into a sponge.

Rather than seeing the room from the arcane 'eye' she had just tried to conjure, Twilight Sparkle had the dubious honour of making Luna moan happily in her sleep, then hugging Twilight Sparkle tighter if such a thing were possible, before rolling over onto her back and dragging the slightly smaller Twilight with her, so that Luna was lying on her back, Twilight was draped over Luna in a very compromising position, blushing furiously as her lower body slipped between Luna’s hind-legs and certain parts of their anatomies became acquainted.

The Canterlot Academy where Twilight Sparkle had attended wasn't quite as squeaky clean as the ponies of Equestria were led to believe, and one day after sneaking into the library late at night to study for an upcoming test, Twilight had come across a pair of third-year Students engaged in an extra-curricular activity of their own.

Paralyzed with fear, Twilight had been stuck in the next row of book-shelves as the two older students proceeded to do unspeakable things to each other, or so the much younger and innocent Twilight had thought at the time, but the sounds they had made together had remained in Twilight's memories. She knew what a sound like what Luna had just made meant ...

And as the 'Sympathy' between the two Alicorns rebounded the sensations Luna had felt back to Twilight, the smaller Alicorn blushed so hard she almost turned as pink as Pinkie Pie, and tried to think of deserts, sponges and dried up river-beds with mixed success.

By Celestia's Beard, I can't use magic without us having those sensations ... oh no, what happens when Luna wakes up and tries to magic us apart oh no no no bad bad bad we'll shout the Castle down around us what do IdowhatdoIdowhatdoIdo?

She'd only just managed to get to the bottom of the whole 'Clack' incident with Luna, with Celestia acting as a mediator, and now this? Luna was going to think she was a pe ... a per ... a naughty pony!

It's okay, it's fine, we're just in a very embarrassing position, Luna tends to be loud enough to be heard a mile away if she panics, we can't use magic aaaaand she just woke up. No problem ... no problem ... oh who am I fooling, we're dooooomed!

Luna's eyes fluttered open, sleepily staring at Twilight in the unfocused way a pony does when they just wake up.

"Uhhmmm .... Luna, please don't freak out, but we're stuck, and I can't get loose, and pleasedon'tusetheRoyalCanterlotVoice and I ... huuuuh ... huuuh! I'm so sorry, we're stuck!" Twilight found herself babbling before she managed to take a deep breath to stop herself from hyperventilating.

"Twili ... wait, no, get off!" Luna squeaked, her horn glowing with the beginning of a spell before Twilight could tell her to stop, and the purple Alicorn felt her fur tingle with the tell-tale prickling sensation of a teleportation spell ...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We're in bed together, and she's hugging me in my sleep! Luna screamed mentally, the warm, blissful feeling that had enveloped her scant moments before fading to hot embarrassment as she tried to teleport away from Twilight Sparkle ... and then her embarrassment turned to puzzlement as she fed her last remaining threads of magical energy into a teleportation spell, strong enough to send Luna back to the moon, all of which drained away in an eye-blink into Twilight, who had a rather bizarre reaction.

Gasping like a fish out of water, Twilight collapsed against Luna's prone form, trembling and twitching, her wings shuddering, the newest Princess of Equestria making what would be otherwise-adorable squeaking noises under different circumstances.

Confused and more than a little bit alarmed, Luna opened her mouth to ask just what was going on when she felt the effects of the failed spell rebound through her own horn!

...please don't freak out, but we're stuck, and I can't get loose... the words came back to haunt Luna just a split second before the 'sympathy' with Twilight Sparkle allowed Luna to experience every single thing happening to the younger Alicorn, and now there were two gasping, flailing Alicorns in the bed, squeaking and moaning until the spasms had passed. Unthinking, both Twilight and Luna wrapped their legs around each other as the spasms rocked them, barely able to breath, let alone control themselves.

A full minute passed before either Luna or Twilight could speak again, laying panting in the bed and trying to not look each other in the eye, which was a feat in and of itself with their horns forcing their heads so close together.

"Oh ... oh ... oh-kaaay, new rule, no magic from either of us." Twilight panted, unable to get her limbs to obey her to pull herself off Luna's body. "We ... we need something, a mirror, so we can see what's keeping our horns locked together like this."

Luna, for her part, guiltily enjoyed the pressure of the slightly smaller Alicorn atop her and the lingering tremors in her own body for a few more moments before mustering the courage to speak, hoping her voice would not to waver. "I-i-indeed. I do not think We could endure another ... incident. If this is Tia's bedroom, there should be a small mirror on her nightstand, can you see it?"

"I ... uh ... think so. But we're going to have to move ... Uhm, can you, uhm, hold onto me, and I'll drag us over to it." The purple Alicorn blushed heavily as she spoke, and Luna was awkwardly aware of the pleasant warmth that was spreading through her body, from where Twilight lay spread-eagled and pliable against her ...

No. Cease. Desist! I am not a ... a 'Filly-Fooler'! She admonished herself mentally before awkwardly wrapping her limbs around Twilight once more, wriggling as best she could to help Twilight drag themselves over the soft cloud-bed towards the nightstand, said wriggling causing both Princesses to blush furiously as certain parts of their anatomies repeatedly introduced themselves to their counterparts and heroically ignoring the squelching noises that accompanied those meetings.

Luck was, for once, with them, and with her greater wingspan, Luna was able to reach her wing over to the nightstand, using her feathers to feel around until she felt the cool silver-plated handle of the mirror and, using the innate magic that all pegasi and alicorns possessed, manipulated her primaries, or 'flight' feathers as crude digits and snagged the mirror, holding it so Twilight could examine their horns, for the awkwardness of their position prevented Luna from using the mirror directly.

Whatever she saw, it made Twilight tremble against Luna and start to stammer and blush.

"Twilight, We command thee to tell us what is holding our horns together like this!" The Lunar Princess demanded, her voice rising in volume as her own panic rose. What could be the cause of this predicament? What had Twilight seen?

And where the Hay was Tia? She was the one who caused this whole embarrassing event in the first place with her ill-thought-out prank!

"Ou-our horns are joined, Luna! I can see the velvet on the tips of our horns, and it’s stuck together!" Twilight stammered, her eyes going far too wide even as her pupils contracted to dots. "I've never even heard of something like this? What do we doooo?"

Panicking, both Mares pushed away from each other, yelling in pain as the attempt to tear free from each other only resulting in a stinging pain in the bases of their horns and splitting headaches.

"WHERE IS TIA?" Luna hissed in frustration. With Twilight lying atop her like this, and their horns mysteriously joined together, neither Mare could get onto their hooves. They were having enough issues with both of their horns rubbing against each other, every ridge of the spiralling lengths catching on each NO THAT IS ENOUGH OF THAT, thank you very much!

"I am right here, sister." Tia's voice replied from the bathroom, sounding mildly amused, and the Solar Princess stepped out of her private bathroom and into their field of vision, still steaming from a hot shower, with her mane and tail wrapped in thick, fluffy towels. "As to what has happened to your horns, I have a theory, but I'm just glad that the side-effects of you two resonating together have finally stopped. The overflow of magic was causing random items in the Castle to animate and move about on their own. I had to explain to the Guard and the castle's staff that Twilight was undergoing some minor changes due to her changing from an Element Bearer and a powerful Unicorn to boot into an Alicorn, and that was the reason you had had to confine her to quarters, until her powers stabilizied ... which is not too far from the truth."

"Pri-princess ... do the ponies know? About Luna and I ... about our ... problem?" Luna heard Twilight ask in a small, ashamed voice, and a small part of the Lunar Princess's heart pricked with pain.

A problem, am I?

"No. As far as anypony knows, you are simply suffering random spikes of magical energy that are overflowing your natural barriers, and Luna had to try and contain the energies last night, hence the surges of 'mixed' magic flooding the Castle." Celestia replied gently, then smiled sheepishly. "I do apologise for all this mayhem. I knew full well neither of you would willingly do something as embarrassing as 'Sparking' in front of me so I could examine your 'Sympathy' in person, and I was not in full control of my own faculties ... I cannot overstate how sorry I am. I had had a little too much cider, and I had only intended to observe the phenomena and see if there was anything I could do privately to help you both handle your 'Sympathy' towards each other's magic, but the reaction was so strong I could not pull your horns apart once it started. "

A flicker of a frown crossed Celestia's face as she looked down at the blushing Alicorns in her bed "I think the resonance between you was so strong you've actually welded the velvet on your horns together. I think a simple procedure should separate you ... but you're going to lose velvet in the process. A lot of it, and the Court will notice straight away."

For several moments, there was nothing but an awkward, uncomfortable pause as the three Alicorns eyed each other.

"Uh ... did Luna and I ... did we embarrass ourselves?" Twilight asked softly, her eyes squeezed tightly shut.

"All that happened was you two blacked out and fainted on my carpet, then your combined magic ran wild and made random pieces of artwork, a dozen suits of armor and half the castle's cutlery self-animate and run amok." Celestia replied in an equally soft voice, her contrite tone completely ruined by the huge smile on her face. "Honestly, I am so very sorry ... I had the best of intentions, but the worst of executions. Still, we have resolved the issue, at least for a few days."

"Tia, dear sister, I do not see how tricking myself and Twilight into this mortifying situation is helpful in the slightest!" Luna snapped, feeling completely humiliated at their predicament. Celestia must have heard them when Luna's attempted teleportation spell had misfired! Thank the Mother Earth that the cloud-bed would silently absorb any ... leakages.

The fact that Luna knew that at least half the ‘leakages’ weren’t hers only added to the confusion and frustrations that whirled inside her.

"Well, as of this moment, Twilight could not cast any spell of note, and you, Luna, are almost out of magic now, are you not?" Princess Celesita replied gently, all traces of mirth gone from her face. "I have spent the day ..."

"DAY?" Twilight and Luna wailed in surprise and distress.

"Ahem, yes, the day conferring with my personal archivist, and have poured over several ancient scrolls that claimed to be the final word on 'Cutie Mark Resonance' and 'Magical Sympathies'." Celestia continued, mouth firmly set against smiling, as she marched around the bed to the other side. "Most are little more than mythical drivel or romantic fantasy, but a scroll penned by Starswirl the Bearded did mention that entities suffering from powerful 'Sympathies' can learn to 'ground' the excess energies caused by their ‘Sympathy’ into specially prepared crystal matrixes, and even turn those energies to good use, given practice."

"Hence, and with some reluctance, I am sending you both to the ancient castle of the Royal Pony Sisters ... in effect, the old capital of Equestria. I will not inform the Court of your location, naturally, but we will tell them that this is a training mission for Twilight Sparkle." Outlined by Celestia's golden magic, the towels on her mane and tail unwrapped themselves from her body and drifted down onto the bed, before both Luna and Twilight felt Celestia poke at the mutual 'sheath' of skin that joined the uppermost portions of their horns, shivering in spite of themselves as the act caused their horns-tips to grind against each other. "It is far enough away that no-pony can disrupt your lessons, yet close enough for me to reach you via teleportation within a few minutes if the need arises, and that if your magic begins to overflow again due to the Sympathy, it will have dissipated into the wilds of the Forest long before another Pony can detect them."

There was a moment of pain as Celestia's magic forced it's way between the two horns of the smaller Alicorns, teasing apart the velvet that could be salvaged and cutting with surgical precision that which was too deeply conjoined to be saved, until Luna and Twilight felt the last springy connection between them release, and both Alicorns could pull their heads away from each other.

"So it's exile, dear Sister, until such time as we can handle this ... problem?" Luna could not keep the bitterness out of her voice as Twilight shakily heaved herself away from Luna and crawled to the other side of the bed, away from Celestia. "And how long will that be? A year? A decade? More? How long will we be able to keep up the charade, while the Court laughs behind my back, while Twilight Sparkle's friends wonder what they did wrong for her to shun them so?"

Celestia's expression went from supressed mirth to one of shock and pain, but Luna felt far too angry to take her comment back or apologise. Twilight considered their Sympathy a 'problem', and was ashamed of being connected to Luna. Celestia was effectively banishing them to the ancient capital, the site of Luna's fall from grace and corruption into Nightmare Moon and more painful memories than Luna felt she could ever deal with. She had missed an entire day thanks to Celestia's ill-thought prank, and Mother Earth only knew what the Court would think of her now, that she could only handle three weeks of double-duty, when Celestia had managed a thousand years of it!

"Luna ... I would never, never exile you! With the rate at which Twilight learns to control new forms of magic, I expect you both to be gone only a week or two at most!" Celestia gasped, reaching for Luna with her wings and all but dragging her angry younger sister into a tight embrace. "I would never let you undergo such a horrible fate again, never!"

"And ... there is another reason why I am sending you to that place. Ponyville is not much more than six or seven hours walking distance from the old castle, and far less by flight." Luna sighed and relaxed against Celestia's chest, patting her elder sister comfortingly as the eldest Alicorn started to shake. "I-it's not too far that you both can't go to Po-ponyville and spend time with your friends, take a break e-every now and then. I don't want to send you away, but until you can control the 'Sympathy' between you, it's just too dangerous to have you both in Canterlot, and if I send one of you away, the Nobles will start to draw their own conclusions, few of them pleasant."

"Ponyville ... that's not so bad." Luna murmured to her sister softly as Celestia shook, the large white body of the Ruler of Equestria shuddering as the Solar Princess tried not to cry, before the Lunar princess sighed again in defeat and hugged her sister back. "It's alright, Tia. I'm so sorry for snapping at you, it's just been a rough few weeks, with the Sparking incident with Twilight, and the drama with the News-Ponies, and then the rumors that I'd imprisoned Twilight and was using your absence to take over Canterlot ..."

"There is ... just one more thing ..." Celesita sighed, the faint golden glow of her magic illuminating the room for a brief moment, before something fell onto the bed with a muffled thump. "My Archivist found a ... a rather unusual solution, at least for the overflow of magical power."

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If there had been a moment when Twilight Sparkle felt lower in her life ... it wasn't a moment she could recall at this time.

Not only had she just had her first ... first ...debute, as it were, but she'd had it with another Mare, and more importantly, a friend who just happened to be the Lunar Princess. And it had been a 'duet', if the feelings from the 'Sympathy' they shared had been any indication.

Or the mess you both left in Celestia’s bed! A snarky inner voice commented.

Oh shut up! Twilight bawled at the inner voice. Shut up, shut up, shut uuuuuup!

No, what was worse was that Luna now probably hated her, and Celestia must have heard them! It had been accidentally, but still! If Twilight had possessed a decent amount of magical energy in her body right now, she would have teleported herself far, far away from this place!

That the day would ever come that I would wake up in the Princess's room and feel such shame ... Twilight thought with remorse, grabbing a double hoof-ful of the enchanted cloud that made up the mattress of Celestia's bed and jamming her face into the impossibly soft mass, trying to not cry.

"TIA! What the hay are those things doing here?" Twilight's trip down pity-street took a hard right when Luna launched herself away from Celestia, collided with Twilight and sent the pair of them soaring off the bed.

"Luna! Twilight! Are you alright?" Celestia yelled, trotting around to the two tangled Mares, levitating what looked like two small, wrought-iron bangles with her magic. "Please tell me you didn't have another ... incident?"

"N-no, your Highness!" Twilight grunted, trying to pretend that Luna's flank was not resting on her head right now. "Luna, what happened?"

"Take those infernal things away! Tia, what possible use could Starswirl's Shackles serve?" Luna shrieked, scrambling off Twilight and away from Celestia, true panic in her voice. "I WILL NOT BE SHACKLED! I WILL NOT BE IMPRISONED AGAIN!TIA, NO, YOU PROMISED ME! TIA!"

Looking horrified, Celestia cast the bangles away to the other side of the room and once again grasping her younger sister in her wings and holding her tightly as Luna sobbed and whimpered, half-hugging Celestia, half struggling to get away.

"Princess? Luna? What ... I don't understand ..." Twilight murmured in shock as she unsteadily got to her hooves. The unflappable Celestia, the stoic Luna, both of them reduced to tears by a simple set of old-fashioned jewellery?

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Several minutes and a box of tissues later, both Luna and Celestia had calmed down enough for Twilight Sparkle to make sense of the situation. And in typical Twilight fashion, decided that the best way to keep herself from going into a panic was to make herself a mental list of what had happened.

Celestia had little choice but to confine both ponies to her own personal quarters after they had fallen unconscious during her 'prank' and the resulting surge of magic caused by the 'Sympathy', a surge of magic which had grown so strong during her 'test' of their 'Sympathy' to each other that their horns had been welded together, and the surge of uncontrolled magic had drifted through the castle itself and randomly animating various objects after the sensa ... the shock of the sudden 'Sympathy-attack' had knocked both Twilight and Luna out cold.

Twilight decided it would be best for all and sundry to just put down the third 'Sympathy' between herself and Luna this morning as 'that awkward situation' and leave it at that. Thank Faust for the absorbent properties of Cloud Beds!

Celestia's 'solution' to the problem of such a high rate of Sympathy, or Magical Resonance, between two of the most powerful Ponies in Equestria was to send them to the ancient ruins within the Everfree Forest that had once been the capital of Old Equestria so that the two could work together without interference from other Ponies, to understand how their 'Sympathy' could be controlled.

And the 'bangles' that had caused Luna to react with such abject terror were devices created by Starswirl the Bearded to drain magical energies or essences from the wearers into a third artefact, a pumpkin-sized, cube-shaped mass of pink quartz that Celestia's Archivist was now attempting to find in the Royal Vaults, a mystical battery known as Empathy's Core, which could store the power indefinitely in a state that any Pony with a spark of magic could then tap into at will.

Unfortunately, the bangles, known as Starswirl's Shackles, had been misused in the past by several Unicorns to artificially enhance their own powers by draining another Unicorn, or a certain Princess of the Night, who wore the second 'Shackle'. And Luna's reaction to them was nothing short of abject terror, because she had believed that Princess Celestia intended to shackle both Twilight and Luna and drain them to the point where their magical essences would be completely drained, a fate which would take even an Alicorn weeks or even months to recover their full strength.

"I'm sorry Tia, I'm so so sorry, I just panicked, everything is happening so fast, and I ..."

"No, it's my fault for trying to force a result, Lulu, without asking your permission first ..."

"Luna, Princes Celestia, I'm so sorry, this is all my fault, and somehow, I probably cast a spell when I was drunk on the night of the Coronation ..."

"No Twilight, not even you could cast a spell of this magnitude, it's obviously fate at work ..."

"I apologise as well, Twilight, you've been caught up in something beyond even my abilities to help ..."

Eventually all three Princess ran out of apologies and settled on nestling together on Celestia's bed, Princess Celestia in the middle, Twilight and Luna tucked up against her side, Celestia's wings draped over them, enjoying the closeness and the warmth of family and friendship.

Finally, Celestia sighed and began to explain. "My Archivist believes that Empathy's Core and Starswirl's Shackles can drain off any excess energies created if you two start to ... 'Sympathize' with each other again, so that you will not be drained and left trapped and unconscious like before." Celestia's soft, snow-white muzzle came down to nuzzle the top of Luna's head, then Twilight's, before her wings tightened around them and hugged the smaller Alicorns to the Solar Princess. "Due to the nature of the ... of the issue at hoof, I dare not send even a Guard-Pony out with you, for fear of information being leaked back to the Nobility, who will see the Magical Resonance as a political vulnerability they can exploit."

Continuing, Celestia turned and levitated the two 'shackles' back up onto the bed, frowning at them. "In any case, I suspect that with the magical skill that both of you possess, either one of you will be able to use the excess energy stored within Empathy's Core to provide yourselves with almost anything you might require, but just in case, I will also be providing you with a bottle of Dragon's Fire to send me letters for additional supplies, and I will show you both how to trigger the Shackles’s emergency function, so you can remove them at will if either one of you feels unsafe."

Twilight, for her part, simply leaned into the warm, solid body of Celestia and enjoyed the moment as a small part of her mind filed away all of what Celestia was saying. Celestia had a plan. Celestia was going to make everything right again.

All she and Luna had to do was somehow master a barely understood 'resonance' between themselves, or else they might be stuck in the Everfree Forest forever.

"... need shelter, of course. Bedding, food ... oh, and bathing equipment. The nearby rivers still have a slight infestation of Hydra spawn ..."

"... don't want to live in there, Tia. Too many bad memories of what I did, to you, to our Ponies, for me to ..."

" ... not certain how we'll get all that equipment out there without ... oh! OH! Of course, he can help ..."

And tucked in to the side of her beloved teacher, assured that all could be solved, Twilight Sparkle slipped back into slumber

Chapter 4

CHAPTER 4

"Necklace, necklace, necklace, necklace, necklace aaaand ... big crown-thingy!" Twilight muttered to herself as she went down the checklist, ticking off the final boxes as a rather unhappy Spike jumped up and down on a large and battered suitcase, trying to get the damnable thing to shut properly. "That's the Elements of Harmony all accounted for ... have I forgotten anything? Anything else I need to take with me on this training trip?"

While she was away, the jewellery that served as the 'tokens' of the Elements of Harmony would be stored in Rarity's home, where they could be safely hidden amongst the wealth of jewels and ornaments that the designer kept in her 'inspiration' room.

"A .... bigger .... suitcase .... may-BEEEE!" Spike grunted every time he landed, before the suitcase snapped open and catapulted the baby-dragon onto the bed.

"Oh! That's right, my special pillow! I just can't sleep properly when camping without it!" Twilight said brightly, having completely missed Spike's complaints and his 'flight', levitating the pillow, which lay right next to Spike, up off the bed and into her suitcase, and then closed the bulging suitcase with a single 'push' of her magic.

Thankfully still off in her own world, Twilight Sparkle missed the glare from her Number One Assistant, one that could have melted stone, as she levitated the suitcase out of the room to rest by the door, before taking one last look at her bedroom.

It was a nostalgic, bitter-sweet feeling. To finally be 'home' after so long, only to leave again so soon. Who knew that these living wooden walls could feel so comforting ...

Spike says he can handle the library, he's already done so for a few weeks now, and I've asked Rarity to pop over every few days to make sure he's not in any trouble .... or eating all the gems in one sitting ... The purple Alicorn thought to herself as she closed her eyes and tried to think of anything she'd left undone. He has been saying I don't give him enough space ...

"I still don't get why Princess Celestia is making you and Luna go to the Everfree Forest to train ... can't you just train in Canterlot, or Ponyville, where your friends can find you?" The baby Dragon grumbled as he slid off her bed and walked over to give his 'sister' a goodbye hug.

"Because we … uh ... my powers aren't stable yet. Because they keep spiking like they are, it's not safe for me to practice using them in areas with lots of Ponies around." Twilight replied sadly, wrapping a wing around Spike's head and hugging him in return. I wish I could tell you exactly where I was going, and what’s really going on ... "But don't worry, Luna is with me, so there'll be no problems at all. I wish I didn't have to go either, but this is a Royal Decree Spike, from Princess Celestia herself. If even Luna can't say no, I can't either."

"Yeah, well ... let's not tell Fluttershy you might be setting parts of the Everfree forest on fire then." Spike said, grinning hugely. "Last thing you need is Fluttershy giving two of Equestria's Princess 'The Stare'!"

"Ugh, don't remind me ... and Spike, seriously, Princess Celestia has commanded that nobody know where Luna will be training me. I’ve broken that Decree so you know what’s going on if there’s an emergency. So no following us into the Everfree Forest, and no telling our friends where I am unless it's an emergency, something huge like a second Changeling Invasion. And that goes double for Pinkie Pie."

"Hehe, yeah, imagine if Pinkie Pie starts to drop by to set up parties for you two!" The Dragon added, an impish grin on his face. "I can just see it now, you and Luna, trying to meditate, with Pinkie Pie swinging by overhead screaming "MAGIC PAAAAAAARTAAAAAY"! at the top of her lungs!"

"If I need their help, I'll send you a message through the Flame-Scroll spell along with our weekly correspondence." Twilight tried very hard not to smile at the mental image her Assistant/Little Brother had conjured for her, before hugging him tightly once again at the top of the stairs. "I trust you with the Library, Spike. I know you can handle it, and I won't be too far if something drastic happens."

"Hah, more like I won't be too far when you need something." Spike retorted, but did so with a smile. "I won't ask where exactly you're going, so nopony can get it out of me ... but are you sure you don't want to take Owlicious with you? He could be useful in a pinch?"

"More than a brave Dragon? No, Owlicious needs to stay here and be your assistant while I'm away ... and again, please apologise to the girls that I can't speak to them right now ... Princess Celestia was adamant that I take what I need from the library and leave quickly and quietly." Twilight started to say, then sighed heavily, levitating her suitcase down the stairs after Spike, taking one last, longing look around her home for the past three years.

Goodbye ... I won't be long, I promise. Twilight promised her beloved library as Spike opened the door just wide enough to stick his head out and scan the street, before gesturing for Twilight that it was all clear.

It was with a sense of regret and fondness that Twilight Sparkle crept out of her home, seeing Ponyville shrouded in the faint light of pre-dawn ... and took to the air with her suitcase, leaving Spike behind to take care of their home ... and her friends to wonder why she could not spend even one day with them after nearly a month-long absence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The flight over Ponyville was brief, but the night air was still very cold, which forced Twilight to surround herself with a heating spell, which also had the unfortunate side-effect of causing her to glow slightly, but the trip did give Twilight Sparkle room to think, to try and sort out her emotions.

There's the Cake's shop ... the school-house ... oh, Rarity's lights are on! Must be working on something big to be up at this hour! Twilight found herself chuckling as she imagined Rarity at her desk, torn between getting her beauty sleep and finishing a 'fabulous' new design.

Home after home passed under her wings, and Twilight found herself wavering, trying to find excuses to stay in Ponyville for just a day, maybe two, just to let her friends know she was well, that everything was fine.

But everything is not fine. Luna and I flinch as soon as we're in the same room, neither of us have any idea how bad this 'Sympathy' is going to become over time, Princess Celestia has had to send us away on a training mission to stop the Nobles from gossiping about us ...

So consumed with the negative thoughts that filled her, Twilight missed a Pony in the orchards of Apple Acres staring up at the glowing Alicorn in surprise as she flew towards the Everfree Forest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Everfree Forest ... such a frightening place. Here, the wild grew strong and alone and vicious, without the need for Ponies to protect and shape it.

It had not always been so. Once, it had been a place of exquisite, sculpted beauty, the work of hundreds of generations of Ponies whom had guided and nurtured the land to be the apex of a balance between bounty and beauty.

All of it washed away in a single night of rage and fear and jealousy ... all because of her childish behaviour, all because she wanted to be loved like her sister.

All because she had been so desperate and lonely that she’d not been able to see the Nightmare Spirit for what it truly was.

Luna sighed as she stared at the ruined castle, now known to the Ponies of this era as the home of the 'Royal Pony Sisters'. True, she had been possessed by an evil Spirit, and true, the Ponies had neglected her Night, and all the effort she put in to make it as beautiful as she could, but the truth of the matter was that Luna had been sidelined by her older and more socially adept sister, and despite all their adventures together, Celestia had turned her full attention to rulership, leaving Luna alone with only a small number sour-faced servants for company during the long night hours.

That Luna had conquered the savage and tribal Bat-Ponies and then brought them into Equestrian society, and spent every night keeping the dreamscapes and minds of the entire Kingdom free of nightmares and the machinations of rogue groups of Unicorns seeking to dominate the ‘lesser’ breeds had never been mentioned. Celestia had claimed it would terrify the Ponies to realise their lives were still under threat, but at that time, Luna had thought it just another barrage of excuses so that Celestia could avoid sharing the love and affection of the Ponies with her sister.

Celestia should have done this. Luna might have said that. So many ways they had both missed the signs of the coming conflict, of the growing division between them.

The bitterest irony of all... Luna thought glumly as she glared at the ruined tower, still mostly intact despite over a thousand years of neglect. We sealed away Discord and freed Equestria from his ever-changing chaos, threw back the Gryphon Invasion with just ourselves and Starswirl the Bearded, ended the Bloody Horn rebellion over tea and scones and reduced King Sombra to little more than a mindless shadow ... but the one enemy we could not overcome on our own was ourselves.

Now here she was, alone again, or nearly so. It would be just Twilight Sparkle and herself, in these ruins, until their 'Sympathy' to each other's magic could be controlled.

Putting a hoof to her face and sighing, Luna re-started her mental exercises, trying to expunge the afternoon's disasters from her mind. Every time she thought of Twilight now, she couldn't help but think of the smaller Alicorn lying flush on top of her own body, squeaking adorably as the 'side-effects' of the Sympathy ran their course.

Stop! I. Am. Not. A. Filly. Fooler. Scolding herself, the Lunar Princess turned to more fruitful, and hopefully less embarrassing endeavours, such setting up the camp. Thankfully, Celestia had kept one of Luna's older experiments over the centuries as a keep-sake, a circle of woven moonlight and shadow that could be expanded to be large enough to contain a dozen ponies if need be, or shrunken to the size of a single bit-coin, a portal to a small pocket-dimension, a literal portable hole.

Inside this 'hole', Luna had placed everything she believed they would need. A large, spacious tent for both Princesses, a week's worth of provisions, her bathing supplies, a medical kit, some portable telescopes for star-gazing and the scrolls that Celestia had said seemed to be actually useful to the ... 'problem'.

Why are you so set against this? Wasn't it pleasant to be held in your sleep once again, to feel like a Mare again, rather than Celestia's silly little sister? A rebellious part of Luna's mind asked as the Lunar Princess began levitating the items out of the portable hole. Was it really so bad to be held again, without having to order somebody to do it, or to rely upon your sister to ...

"Enough, enough, ENOUGH! I am a Princess, and a Princess is not a ... a filly-fooler!" Luna snapped to herself, glaring into the impossibly dark portable hole as her levitation spell grew unstable with her anger, dumping parcels and boxes roughly onto the ground.

Despite her best efforts, the warmth of laying under the covers with another pony clinging to her came back to haunt Luna, only irritating her more. Apart from a handful of 'Night Guard' and some of Celestia's own servants, she had little friendly contact with other ponies in Canterlot. The Nobles were scheming against each other constantly, and showing favour to one would cause a veritable storm of chaos as the lucky Noble used that relationship as leverage.

The servant-ponies were polite, gentle and always unfailingly positive, but there was always a ... a falseness to their actions. Were they nice because they were nice, or were they buttering her up because Luna was royalty? And there was always the radically different positions of commoner and royalty getting in the way, at least to Luna's eyes.

And her Night Guards, while loyal ... were very much gung-ho enthusiasts looking for a position where they would not have to serve under Celestia's stodgy and old-fashioned generals. But then, Bat-Ponies always were ready to fight, or chase something down, or anything that required adrenaline, a thrill and victory. Even General Thunderwing had been something of a rogue element in the Royal Guard before circumstances had forced the Bat-Pony into higher and higher levels of command.

I wonder what Twilight would have thought if she knew I had almost poached Shining Armor to serve as my Captain of the Guard... Luna found herself smiling as she imagined the look on the young Twilight Sparkle's face as she found her BBBFF wearing dark, bat-themed armor instead of the royal red coat that Celestia insisted he wear.

Further musing was lost as she heard a familiar voice screaming in the distance, and Luna looked up in surprise to see a glowing Twilight Sparkle speeding through the air unsteadily, followed by what looked to be giant moths.

Even for the Everfree Forest, insects that big was odd. Still, they looked to be relatively harmless, but Twilight Sparkle was panicking like they were setting her tail on fire and telekinetically swinging her suitcase around like a club, which was all the signs that Luna needed to take flight and go 'rescue' the younger Alicorn from her 'tormentors'.

"Twilight! TWILIGHT! Whatever spell you are using, dispel it!" Luna shouted as she closed in on the panicking mare. "The moths are attracted to the light! DOUSE THINE LIGHT!"

Luna would later say she was unsure if Twilight heard her, or if the younger mare simply panicked too much and lost control of her spell, but the aura of pale purple light grew larger, swelling like a soap-bubble around Twilight before 'popping', making the giant moths flutter wildly after the dissipating fragments of the spell, and Luna found herself with a shaking Twilight clinging to her neck and her suitcase going flying through the air, hopefully towards the camp-site.

"Oh Celestia, are they gone, are they still chasing me, I hate moths, I HATE MOTHS, get them away, get 'em awaaaaaay!" Twilight squealed, obviously terrified as she clung to Luna with her eyes tightly clenched. "I'm not a book, don't eat meeeee!"

Unsure of what would happen if the panicking mare was exposed to more magic-seeking moths, Luna had to struggle back down to the ground on her own wing-power, no easy feat with Twilight grappling her and getting in the way of Luna's wings, but soon they were both on the ground by the pile of supplies, with Luna trying unsuccessfully to untangle herself from Twilight's grasp.

"Twilight, its okay, the moths are long gone ... please stop, this is ... too clos ... where are you touching?" Luna muttered as she slowly, awkwardly disentangled herself from Twilight, cursing their predicament, which precluded the use of magic.

They still didn't know if they would resonate only if their horns were touching, or if their 'Sympathy' had grown so strong after the disaster in Celestia’s room that it would affect them if their magic touched each other, so Luna had to resort to mere physical abilities to carry Twilight to the camp-site and get her settled ... and noticed that Twilight was shivering, badly.

"C-cold ... but can't use the sp-p-pell, the mu-mu-mu-moths will come b-b-back!" Twilight whimpered, shaking furiously from both the cold and her fear as Luna hastily tried to erect one of the tents with just her hooves.

Until Twilight fully grew in to her new powers and domain, whatever that was, she was still just a pony with wings and horns. Mortal concerns such as temperature, food and diseases were still of concern, and the thought that Twilight might suffer caused Luna to force herself past any fear of the Sympathy as she turned to spells in desperation to set up the tent, throwing everything she had already unpacked into the side of the tent but for the bedding, which she quickly wrapped around Twilight Sparkle and, praying to the Mother Earth that the buffer of the bedding would serve as sufficient insulation against more magical mayhem, levitated the shivering mare into the tent.

Next was discovering where Twilight's suitcase had gotten to. Knowing Twilight, the young mare would be up and rushing about, trying to find the ... oh dear.

Following the 'scent' of Twilight's magic, Luna half-ran, half-flew to the very border of the ruins of the ancient castle, where Twilight's suitcase had firmly lodged itself into a tight space between two mammoth slabs of cut stone.

There is no way I am going to be able to move either one of those, not drained as I am and most certainly not without doing damage to the suitcase. Luna snarled mentally, stamping a hoof in frustration. Thanks to Celestia's drunken attempt to study the Sympathy between herself and Twilight, Luna now had barely enough power within her to perform simple spells such as levitation and telekinesis. Thankfully, her ability to raise and lower the night sky, and all it contained, was not tied to something as simple as her personal magic.

Back inside the tent, however, Luna found to her surprise that Twilight still shivered from the cold, despite being wrapped in some of Canterlot's finest sheep's wool blankets.

"There is ... nothing for it." The Lunar Princess sighed and began removing her crown, shoes and breastplate, before crawling into the cocoon of blankets, wrapping her wings around the slightly smaller, violently shivering Mare. "This will not become a habit, Twilight Sparkle ..."

And yet, within a few minutes of listening to Twilight's teeth stop their chattering and her whimpers becoming the deep, slow whisper of calm sleep as Luna's body-warmth helped restore Twilight's own body to its normal temperature, Luna found herself likewise drifting off to the realm of dreams against her best efforts.

"Preposterous ... I have already ... spent most of today asleep!" She protested weakly as her eyes closed with unusual heaviness.

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Morning, the next day

"And you're sure that Twilight said that she couldn't tell us where she was going?" Rarity asked, staring right at Spike, who shifted under that appraising gaze, feeling as if he was being interrogated for a crime, rather than obeying a Royal Command.

"Yeaaaah, she can't even tell her friends? What's the Princess thinking?" Rainbow Dash muttered, rubbing a hoof over the face of the latest release of Daring Do series. Which Princess that Rainbow Dash was referring to was ambiguous, however.

"HEY! Y'all know 'bout how them high'n'mighty Ponies in Canterlot twisted Twilight's letters!" The tan-coloured hoof of Applejack rapped on the floor of the library, drawing attention to the farm-Pony. "Y'all remember that poor Twilight got so upset! Spike says that Twilight's gonna be writing to us again, and she's off with Princess Luna too."

"Y-yeah! Twilight's really gotta focus on her training, or else she and Luna are going to be stuck training away from Canterlot for months!" The baby dragon capitalized on the opening Applejack had given him, puffing out his chest and trying to look imposing. "It's not her fault, or Princess Celestia's, it's those stuck-up Nobles and the gossip-Ponies that write the magazines! If not for them, Twilight and Luna wouldn't have to be away on their training trip!"

"Well ... I can't say I approve of Twilight not even leaving us a note, but if it was a Royal Decree, there's not much that we can do." Rarity sighed dramatically, but Spike could see the irritation in her, in the way her mane shook and her eyes twitched.

"Yeaaaaaaaah ... but it's not cool, not cool at all." The cyan wings of Rainbow Dash also gave an irritated twitch, before the Pegasus snatched up the new book and began stuffing it into her saddle-bag. "Twilight's going to majorly owe us for letting this go."

After several more exchanges of the same nature, finally Rarity and Rainbow Dash left the library, leaving Spike and Applejack alone to try and figure out what to do next.

"Now Spike, I'm sure you understand, but sure as shootin', you'll be giving us those letters, alright?" Applejack murmured as she helped the baby Dragon clean up the mess that Rainbow Dash's 'search' for clues had made of the public area of the library. "It's been such a long time since we heard from Twilight, and now she's come home and left without even leaving us a note. It's not something a Pony should do to her friends, and it's made us all mighty upset with her, you hear?"

"I hear you, Applejack. Twilight had her reasons, but I'll pass the message along. I'm sure Twilight will tell us all about everything that's going on ... and then write a report on it!" Spike added, making both Pony and Dragon chuckle. "Besides, she's with Luna ... what could possibly go wrong?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the second time in as many days, Luna found herself in the warm, embarrassing and very comfortable embrace of Twilight Sparkle, blushing furiously as she tried very hard not to think too much about the warm, firm body snuggled against her and the too-adorable-to-call-snoring noises Twilight was making with her muzzle lying on top of Luna's neck, half-buried in Luna's star-scape-like mane.

Despite the sun clearing the tree-line, the air still held the bitterly cold child of the Everfree Forest night, a chill that Luna's night lacked within more civilized areas, a side-effect of the 'Wild Magic' that ran rampant through the region.

I could wake her up ... or I could try to ... no, her wing's over my ... where are you touching, Twilight? Luna thought desperately, trying to not squirm as Twilight's wing, or more specifically, her primaries or flight feathers, twitched and slide across Luna's flank and cutie-mark, the pale purple Alicorn mumbling something unintelligible in her sleep. Mother preserve me! I thought Tia was bad enough! Twilight is molesting me in her sleep! Help!

However, neither Luna's long-vanished mother nor some other miracle occurred, and Luna found herself still entwined with the sleeping cuddle-fiend known as Twilight Sparkle. Not that it was an entirely bad thing, as that rebellious corner of Luna's mind kept remind her. Twilight, despite being a devout bibliophile, was in excellent physical health and the peak of her youth before becoming an Alicorn, and the transformation to the quasi-divine state was only accentuating her form.

Just a few more years, and she'll be as big as Cadence. Maybe, if she really is the Aspect of Magic, as big as myself ... Luna thought to herself, absently stroking Twilight's mane with one hoof as the younger Mare mumbled again, too low to hear, and shifted in her sleep, pushing her muzzle further into Luna's mane. If she's the Aspect of Friendship ... we're going to need to remodel Canterlot.

Although Luna would probably be mortified if anypony saw her right now, she felt ... happy in this position. This closeness, this warmth, was something that the Lunar Princess had craved while trapped on the moon in her corrupted form. No awkward titles to trip over, no political ambitions poisoning the friendships, just a simple, peaceful contact between herself and a pony she could call 'friend'.

Eventually, Twilight began to wake up, blinking blearily at Luna at first before returning to her sleepy snuggling, then the new Alicorn went rigid with shock.

Ah ... here it comes. Luna thought to herself dryly, using her magic without thinking to unwrap them both from the blankets, Twilight wide-eyed and pale-faced as she looked down and saw her wing resting possessively on Luna's cutie-mark.

Luna expected tears, maybe horrified denials or accusations ... not to have Twilight's eyes roll back in her head and the young Alicorn faint dead away! Still, at least it postponed the inevitably awkward conversation for a precious few minutes, giving Luna the chance to get away, splash her face with some water from the nearby stream and get a fire going, and the beginnings of breakfast started.

Twilight emerged, still blushing, from the tent and gave a shaky bow to Luna before rushing to the stream to perform her own bathing, missing Luna's sigh.

We are of equal rank now, Twilight. I had thought we had also solved this issue months ago, during the Nightmare Night ... Luna thought to herself sadly. Although after our last ... encounter, I can imagine neither of us is thinking straight right now.

Thinking straight ... no, perhaps I'm thinking ... Luna shook her head to dispel the thought, gritting her teeth in frustration as she stirred the oat porridge one final time before ladling it into two massive tin bowls. Even a full grown Stallion would have been challenged to eat the entire amount, but Luna knew from previous experience that an Alicorn that had exhausted much of her power could consume ridiculous amounts of food.

Twilight's return to the camp came with a clatter of stones, the younger, smaller Alicorn's face and neck dripping with water, a sheepish smile on her face.

"Good ... ah ... good morning, Luna." Twilight stammered, that too-broad smile still on her face. "I ... aaaah ... don't really remember much ..."

"You were being chased by giant moths, and lost control of your spell." Luna sighed and telekinetically pushed the bowl of steaming porridge towards her 'student', looking Twilight dead in the eyes. "You were so cold that you wouldn't warm up, so I had no choice but to use my own body to heat you. I suspect you've never been this low on magic before, have you?"

Twilight took the large bowl in her hooves before settling down in front of the fire, shaking her head slowly. "Once, when I had to stop an Ursa Minor, but I've never ... it never felt like this. Like I'm about to fall over any second, I'm cold right in the core of my body, and my ... my everything feels like it's made of jelly."

"Well, some hot food will help with that. You know, of course, that Unicorns need to eat more than other Ponies because of their magic?" Luna added, honestly chuckling as she watching Twilight stare into the bowl of porridge with obvious hunger. "Well, as a newly 'reborn' or Ascended Alicorn, you will find yourself eating as much food as several ponies could, several times a day in fact, as your body turns the food into the reserves it will need when you start to become a true Alicorn."

"You know, I never really eat breakfast ..." Twilight murmured, staring into the porridge like it held the mysteries of the universe before starting to levitate 'spoon'-sized amounts of porridge into her mouth. "And I never thought it strange that Princess Celestia would finish off an entire buffet tray all on her own at every meal ... she would always eat so daintily that it seemed natural somehow."

"Ah that would be one of her charm-spells. Ponies would find such hunger to be strange, unnatural even, so Tia weaves a subtle charm about herself, a soft compulsion that makes Ponies ... lose track of time around her when she is eating." Luna explain, frowning slightly. "In the old days, we would just have food waiting for us in our private rooms and retire to them three or four times a day to eat until we were ready to burst, then go back to our duties ..."

"And Twilight? Eat. We will do nothing until that bowl is emptied fully." The older Alicorn added tartly as Twilight started to put her bowl to the side. "Not only will we both need large amounts of food to replenish our magical reserves, but you have weeks of 'starving' yourself to recover from."

"But Luna, I can't possible eat all of ..." Twilight began with a laugh, before looking down at her bowl in surprise: nearly half of the oat porridge had disappeared, and given the size of the bowl, that was enough to feed a Pony the size of Big Mac, let alone a slender Pony like herself. And she had eaten it that in just under a minute.

"Oh, we're will need to have a long talk about your new form, Twilight." Luna chuckled as she attacked her own breakfast with gusto. "But first, we eat, and then we go to recover your suitcase from the ruins."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"...and she didn't even leave a single note as to where she was going! It's outrageous for Twilight to ... to just brush off her friends like this!" Rarity fumed, slapping a hoof down into the herbal bath at the spa, an unusually deep scowl marring her features. "I'm beginning to wonder if she even remembers she has friends in Ponyville, now she's royalty and all!"

"Oh, I'm sure it's nothing like that Rarity. Don't you remember, Twilight has always been there for us, I'm certain Twilight is just so flustered that she forgot?" Fluttershy murmured in response, squeaking as a large 'wave' slapped against her chest and splashed cloudy, herb-scented water against her muzzle.

"Well, perhaps you're right, but still, it's been over two weeks since we last received any letters from Twilight, poor little Spikey-Wikey is having to run the library all on his own, and he's just a baby Dragon after all!" The white Mare muttered, still sulking. The lack of Twilight had affected them all in various ways, few of them pleasant.

Rainbow Dash had become increasingly surly as her attempts to teach Twilight how to fly had been lost under the swarm of etiquette lessons that Twilight had been forced to undertake, Applejack had stopped coming into Ponyville except to sell her farm's produce, Pinkie Pie was sulking of all things, Rarity had found herself without an equally cultured Mare to talk about Canterlot's latest trends and even Fluttershy had found it harder to mingle with the other Ponies of Ponyville without Twilight at her side.

"Oh, I'm sure Twilight will write to us again, maybe even visit us if she gets the chance." Fluttershy murmured soothingly, rubbing a hoof up and down Rarity's arm. "Twilight has never let us down, not ever. As her friends, we can wait a little bit longer, right?"

Rarity's response was an unhappy sniff, but for now at least, the problem had been put aside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh wow, it’s so tight..."

"Wait, don't push it that way!"

"I don't think I ... I can't ... aah!"

"Just ... hold on, I'm almost ... almost there!"

Sweating, trembling, the two Alicorns swayed in unison, their legs on the verge of buckling, their wings hanging limply with exhaustion, horns pulsing with magic.

With a final cry of effort, the two reared back, their horns flaring with magic one last time as the two giant stock blocks ground against each other, the gap between them opening slightly and Twilight's much-abused suitcase popping out and landing on top of its exhausted owner.

For several minutes, both Alicorns lay on the dusty ground of the ruined castle, panting and trying to recover their strength. Both blocks of stone were massive, easily three times the size of a pony and made of granite, and drained as they were, both Twilight and Luna had struggled to move the blocks enough to release Twilight's luggage.

"Well ... I think we have ... solved two issues." Luna gasped as she struggled to her hooves, plodding over to the prone Twilight, who was still smushed under her suitcase. "Our magic does not cause the 'resonance' effect unless we are physically touching our horns together, and we are going to need to eat constantly to replenish our magic. I fear we drained all of our reserves recovering your luggage."

"Mrrfff..." Twilight groaned under her suitcase before Luna dragged the heavily scratched and dusty suitcase off her 'student'. "I can't possibly eat any ..."

Twilight's protest was cut off by a chorus loud growling coming from the bellies of both Alicorns, and the embarrassed giggling that followed.

"Trust me on this, Twilight. Until we return to our full strength, you will find yourself eating more food than a regiment of Canterlot's finest soldiers. In your case, you must eat constantly to help fuel the physical aspects of your transformation, or you may end up stunted or even crippled as your body draws upon itself to fuel the changes." Luna explained again as Twilight slowly got to her hooves and managed to throw a weak levitation spell around her suitcase, making it hover a few inches off the ground.

"Hopefully more than just porridge?" Twilight half-joked, half-pleaded as they walked slowly back to camp.

Luna didn't know about Twilight, but the thought of flight right now made her want to lay down and cry. Walking was one thing, but ponies without wings didn't know how tiring flying could be.

There was a reason that there was no such thing as a fat Pegasus ...

"I'm thinking a round of mulberry jam sandwiches, followed by as much hot tea as we can drink, and then more sandwiches." Luna replied in an impish voice, grinning as Twilight groaned behind her, either in defeat or longing for the food. "Tia promised she would be sending more food to us later, but certainly she will understand that we need more now."

"Uhm, how will Princess Celestia be doing that? I thought teleportation magic didn't work at long ranges within the Everfree Forest?" Twilight asked as the two weary Alicorns trudged back to their campsite. "If she sends ponies out to deliver the food, they'll just tell the Nobles where we are, and the Princess can't just duck out of Canterlot with a few dozen bags of shopping for us ..."

“There is a Pony that my sister suggested we could rely upon, but it will take a day for Tia to get the message to them, and then another day for the Pony to get the supplies to us.” Luna replied, looking in the direction of Ponyville with concern. “Tia also mentioned a stranger in these lands, somebody you know? A … Zebra, I think they are called?”

“Oh, Zecora! Yes, Zecora knows a lot about the Everfree Forest, and magic … her people use magic through alchemy, rather than horns like Unicorns do.” Twilight said brightly, her good humour returning rapidly with the recovery of her luggage and a safe topic to discuss. “Her people dwell in a land on the far side of the Everfree Forest, a place of savannahs and tropical jungles, and there’s only Zebras there. No Pegasi, no Unicorns, only Earth Ponies called ‘Zebras’.”

“Alchemical Magic? Huh, I wonder if that’s … no, they would never teach their secrets to outsiders. Still, at least we know there’s at least one friendly face out here to rely upon.” Talking softly to herself, Luna led the way back to camp, and yet another meal.

Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

“No … no … no, Luna was correct in her choice. The Amber Swirls and the Golden Hooves have bickered and squabbled their way up every level of the courts. Just because they did not get the desired outcome does not mean that We will allow them to waste any more of the court’s time on this … this juvenile argument.” Princess Celestia told the cluster of courtiers, centuries of practice keeping her smiling as the Solar Princess crushed the urge to smack several of the more sycophantic ones as their sly condemnations of Luna’s short ‘rule’ turned to gushing praise.

Oh my Faust, I almost long for the barbarity of the old days. At least then, I could get away with throwing self-important fools like this into the dungeon for a few weeks …

“And … when can we expect Princess Luna and Princess Twilight to return? The court is eagerly awaiting any news on our Princesses …” A foppish Unicorn stallion asked, his voice oozing the same type of false charm that Celestia had come to associate with most of the Nobles of the current era.

In other words, you’re fishing for information for your masters, you slimy little prat …

Celestia gave a good impression of deep thought as the Solar Princess weighed how much truth she could safely reveal to make the story believable.

“Well, I would estimate her powers will stabilize within a few weeks … Luna will keep Twilight safe during her training. Other than that, I will not say. Too many Ponies have been too interested in telling tall stories for their own gain recently.” Celestia said, giving a pointed look to one of the courtiers whom her Guard Captains had identified as a known sell-out to the gossip magazines.

The git didn't even have the decency to look guilty ...

"Perhaps the Ponies forget, that when Twilight Sparkle's powers stabilize, she will be an official member of the Royal House of Equestria, immortal and with all the rights and privileges such a title grants. I am certain that she will be kind-hearted enough to overlook most of the terrible actions taken against her these past few weeks ... but I am sure she will not soon forget the Ponies responsible anytime soon." Smirking internally, the Solar Princess noted whose smiles twitched or fell slightly, and whose eyes widened in panic or narrowed in anger.

Yes, I was wondering how long it would take you all to realise you're about to make an enemy of an immortal Princess with enough magical power to rival Starswirl the Bearded in the prime of his youth.

“Now, if there is nothing else, I must go over some notes that my Sister … and Co-Ruler … left for my perusal. Excuse me, gentle-ponies.” Celestia decided that after weeks chasing down Hydra-Spawn in the infernal Everfree Forest, twisting the knife a few inches more was well and truly justified, as the winces on several of the courtiers’ faces attested.

As the courtiers retreated, no doubt to report to the various Noble factions vying for her favour, Celestia sighed softly and wished once again that she’d never given in to the Royal Consort’s wishes and born them children.

Her children had been a delight, a welcome distraction that helped with the emotional healing she had needed after the events that had sent Luna, infested with the Nightmare Spirit, to the moon for a thousand years, but their descendants were nothing but nuisances and pests, clinging to her like parasites and sapping her will and attention, while Ponies of all breeds suffered in the outlying regions.

There are those that blame my sister for these recent outbreaks of violence and chaos … Celestia mused as she walked with regal grace back to her quarters, doing her best to keep the ‘Princess’ mask in place as the Servants, Guards and Courtiers crossed her path. Would that they knew that if Luna had not been possessed, if Sombra had not become obsessed with power and control, if Imago had not turned to blood-magic to sustain her youth and beauty, if Starswirl had not grown into an introverted and bitter mule of an arch-Mage … I would not be so stretched thin!

Finally, Celestia’s tired, bitter musings ended as she arrived at her private quarters, the Royal Guards standing at attention giving her stiff salutes before opening the doors for her.

These rooms were supposed to be impregnable. Three foot thick walls of magically hardened marble, with a five-inch thick layer of adamantite behind that, and then another foot of the same marble stone, all of it imbued with over nine hundred year’s worth of warding runes and magical defences that fed off one of the largest and most powerful ley-lines in all of Equestria.

All of which were apparently as effective a barrier as a wet tissue against the occupant who sat on her desk, sipping the glass away from the improbably ‘solid’ core of chocolate milk.

“Oh, goody, it’s definitely going to be one of those days …” Celestia groaned, shutting the doors firmly behind her and adding a magical lock for safety.

“Oh Celestia, my dear, dear girl, you must soooo learn to lighten up!” Discord chortled, the windows behind him opening of their own accord as the Aspect of Chaos threw the ‘chocolate milk’ out the window.

Aaaaand three … two … one …

BOOM!

“Hello Discord. I’d offer you something to drink, but …” Celestia began, only to have Discord chuckle and slither sinuously across her desk.

“But we both know that would end like the last time. Flying cups of raspberry tea chasing your Guards around the castle, and the muffins and slices of cake fighting to see who would be eaten first.” The chimeric creature replied gleefully, as he suddenly disappeared in a flash of light, only to reappear, small enough to hide in a tea-cup, on Celestial’s head. “As enjoyable as a deific food-fight would be, I suspect my little-miss grumpy-hooves has enough on her plate. While I was exploring the ‘magic of friendship’ in Manehattan, I felt something rather … bizarre. Even by my standards.”

Sighing, Celestia walked to her desk, Discord wrapping his body around her horn, stretching impossibly long so as to be able to rest his head on the very tip of her horn.

He’s just trying to get a rise out of … ugh, bad thought! Celestia groaned internally as her body started to react to the firm, warm body that had wrapped itself around the sensitive, blood-rich velvet of her horn. It’s Discord. He doesn’t even think about what he’s doing, he just does it! Just ignore it and carry on!

“I can guess what you are referring to, but why don’t you just come out and say it.” The Solar Princess muttered as she sank gracefully onto the low seat behind her desk and began rummaging through the drawers for the enchanted bell that would, when shaken, animate its twin in the royal kitchens and signal the Ponies there that their Princess required food.

“And be direct? Straight to the point? Oh Celestia, my dear girl, you wound this old serpent’s heart!” Discord chortled, then licked her horn!

It was only due to centuries of control that Celestia’s wings did not immediately poomf out at this ‘attack’. He had hit just the right spot, an attack Celestia had never expected to endure from Discord, of all creatures!

“No, dear Celestia, you know me far better than that. A chaotic surge of magic emanating from Canterlot itself, one of the most boring places in this world? And one that tastes like the Moon and the essence of Magic? Oh ho ho ho!” The miniaturized Discord laughed, spinning in place around Celestia’s horn, the Solar Princess gritting her teeth at the ‘attack’ on her person that sent tingles from her horn all the way to the base of her tail, her wings trembling with the urge to spread out in the natural response to such stimulation.

Just be calm, just let it go. At least he’s not turning the hedge garden into Triffids this time. Green-Acres swore he’d quit if that happened again. Celestia told herself, even as the velvet-skin on her horn tingled and throbbed under the many contrasting features of Discord’s tiny body. If I don’t respond to his little ‘game’, he’ll become bored and do something else.

“No no no, my lovely solar sour-puss, I want you to realise just what’s happening on your own, else where’s the fun? But don’t despair! Should matters get out of hoof, or claw, or talon, I’ll be sure to lend an appendage or three!” Discord promised, squeezing himself tighter around Celestia’s horn to the point where even she could not resist and gave a low groan, before agonizingly teleporting himself away at just the wrong moment, leaving Celestia shaking from embarrassment and the agony of denial. “I did make a promise to stop doing evil things, but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop having fun.”

“Discord … I thought we had discussed ‘bad touches’ after that incident with Ponyville’s school-teacher and the self-propelled zucchinis.” The Solar Princess grated, willing herself to physical calmness through force of effort. “Please do not do that again.”

“Oh come on, Cellie, where’s the fun in thaaaa~t!” Still cackling, the Aspect of Chaos reappeared at full size, before flattening himself into a two-dimensional form and wriggling under the door that lead to her bedroom!

“Discord! DISCORD, no!” Celestia shouted, vaulting her desk awkwardly as she raced after Discord.

He could not be in there! There were … things … in that room, hidden behind magical illusions that even her personal Maid-Ponies had never uncovered. Journals on problematic Nobles, correspondence with Twilight Sparkle, half-completed magical experiments, her personal … ahem, 'toys', her diaries!

And Discord was in there, alone and unchaperoned, for at least five seconds, which was exactly five seconds too long for the whimsical Aspect of Chaos to not get himself into trouble in!

“Oh my! Look at all these … oh my!” Discord’s voice rang in Celestia’s ears as she all but flew into the room, panic filling her as she saw Discord whipping around the room, eagerly putting claw and talon on everything.

Literally everything. The whimsical chimera had manifested dozens of disembodied appendages that were flipping through her journals, poking at her private experiments, but thankfully he did not seem to have found anything truly incriminating!

“Oh dear Cellie, you’ve been holding out on me! A complete set of Gryphon … oh and is that a Dragon’s … oh my, oh my, where on earth could someone like you possibly get Tirek’s autograph …”

“Discord! Stop that, please! This isn’t funny anymore!” Celestia pleaded, trying unsuccessfully to dispel Discord’s ‘phantom’ limbs that were rummaging through her belongings.

“But Cellie, look at all this! Why, I don’t think even the Dragons can boast a hoard quite like thi…” Still chortling, the Aspect of Chaos looped his way through the air, before sliding under her bed and going absolutely silent mid-sentence.

Oh NO! Not there, not that!

“Uhm. Is this what I think it is?” Sounding rather shocked, Discord’s head appeared from the far side of the bed, his neck stretching unnaturally as the Chimeric Aspect’s large, yellow eyes focused on an impressively massive piece of moulded plastic that had become lodged in a fork in his antler-like horn.

Not my Itallion Stallion 9000 …

“Discord … you … I …” Celestia fumed, turning bright pink in embarrassment. The ‘toy’ was as long as her fore-leg and half again as thick. She was torn between dying of embarrassment and choking the life out of Discord to keep it a secret …

“Well. Ahem. It seems it’s time for me to be go … ing?” Discord coughed, awkwardly plucking the giant vibrator out of his horn and gingerly laying it down on the bed, before teleporting … only to reappear on the other side of the bed, looking utterly confused. “What in the … that’s not right! Cellie, what are you … oh. Oh dear, that’s not good.”

Still blushing from the base of her horn down to the barrel of her chest, Celestia quivered before Discord with embarrassment and rage, her eyes burning with golden light, her hair rippling and changing of their own accord, the tri-colour mane and tail slowly turning a deep, dusky pink colour.

The torture of being brought to the brink of climax and then being denied by Discord earlier, combined with centuries of enforced abstinence of any form of sexual intimacy with another, and then to have a socially damning secret exposed by the very same Chaos Aspect, all of it churned in Celestia, feeding off her stress and frustrations, and she channelled this frenzy into a spell of negation that wrapped itself around the room, and then Discord.

“Disssssssssscord! We are going to have a very … long … hard… talk about personal spaces …” Celestia ground out the words as she stalked towards Discord, who attempted to back away in turn, but only succeeded in tripping over his own tail and landing on his back on the bed.

“Now wait just a minute! Cellie, this isn’t … where are you … now that is not how a Prince-eeeeeeh! Wait wait waaaait!” Discord babbled, scrabbling on his back as Celestia stalked after him onto the bed, before dropping her body down and pinning the Chaos aspect beneath her.

“No. No more. No more waiting. No more nice Princess. This time, Discord, you’re going to learn the true consequences of your actions!” Celestia raged as her magic gripped the doors to her bedroom, and slammed them shut with a sound like thunder.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hum?” Rarity blinked in surprise as Fluttershy jumped to her hooves. “Darling? Whatever is the matter?”

“I … don’t know.” The yellow Pegasus replied softly, looking around the steamy confines of the sauna in confusion. “I felt a voice crying out in terror … and then they were silenced … and now I smell vanilla …”

“Oh, it’s probably just your imagination, dear. Now sit back down and let the steam do its work …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a pleasant experience to teach Luna something so … so mundane as gathering edible plants from the Everfree Forest.

Humming tunelessly, Twilight parted the thick grasses with her hooves, then used her magic to gently remove one of the plants she was looking for from a cluster of its kind, a small, fleshy green root attached to a thin stalk bearing olive-yellow round leaves, a root that looked something like the result of a messy, drunken one-night stand between a turnip and a squash.

“Twilight, are you sure we are only to take just one?” Luna called out from her position a few meters away, the Lunar Princess eager find food to help their supplies limp along until this mysterious ‘ally’ could show up.

“Yes! Zecora told me that the Jam-Yams can only survive if left in large groups, that’s why we only take one from each clump.” Twilight hollered back, using a fraction of her magic to ‘dust’ the root-like plant and place it in her saddle-bags.

Strangely, here in the Everfree Forest, her magic was returning fast, although not nearly to the level she once possessed. And Luna’s harsh caution about over-extending her magic and possibly crippling herself in the process hung over Twilight’s mind like a shroud.

I could have died. I could have ended up an immortal cripple because I …. Shaking as the image of a self-mutilated, crippled future-Twilight flashed through her mind, the young Alicorn attempted to think of brighter, happier things.

Learning new magic with Princess Celestia and Luna. Flying using her wings. The party she was sure Pinky would throw when she finally got back to Ponyville. Waking up in Luna’s embra-aaaaaah!

Where did that come from? Twilight thought in shock, glad to have some distance between herself and Luna as she felt her face flush with embarrassment, and humiliatingly enough, lust as she remembered certain key moments from the past few days.

Luna twitching and writhing beneath me as our magics twinned, waking up with my muzzle in her mane and feeling perfectly warm and safe, the feel of her flank under my wing …

Was she … what was it Rainbow Dash called it? A closet-case? It wasn’t as if Twilight didn’t have any interest in Stallions, it was just … all the ones she knew were either obsessed with hoof-ball, or they only wanted to know her when she was in estruses, or they were somebody she liked, but were already taken.

There was always Big Mac, but … I knew Fluttershy was crushing on him hard, and he was Applejack’s brother. It would have ruined our friendships. Twilight sighed heavily and moved on, seeking for something other than more Jam-Yams. Sweet and delicious they might be, but Twilight wanted something … meatier.

Wait, Meatier? Is that even a word? And why do we have that word? We’re herbivores, for crying out loud! What made me use that term to describe food?

Despite her mind flitting from one topic to another to distract itself from more troubling thoughts, Twilight was able to make good progress, finding edible fruits and mushrooms, calling Luna over to show the Lunar Princess the correct way to harvest something or how to tell a safe mushroom from a poisonous one. Within a surprisingly short time, their saddle-bags were stuffed with food.

“Jam-yams? I must say, Twilight, I have never before heard of such a plant!” Luna remarked as the two drained Alicorns plodded back to their camp.

“Well, they aren’t really cultivated by Ponies because they tend to take a lot out of the soil, but Zecora plants bulbs all over the Everfree Forest because they were a staple food in her homeland, and the earth around here is rich from all the leaf-litter and such.” Twilight explained, levitating one of the yams out of her saddle-bag to display it to Luna. “First, we need to cut the leaves off, poke a few holes into the yams and let the juice inside drain into a saucepan. We then add some boiling water to that and stir it well, then leave it aside to cool, and we'll have, well, jam.”

“And the yam itself? Is that edible?” The Lunar Princess asked, using her own magic to take hold of the yam, both Alicorns flinching slightly as their magic mingled around the yam before Twilight withdrew her magic, the commingled glow dissipating slowly.

It looks like I’m not the only one who is still thinking about that night! Twilight thought, more than a little bit flustered, before coughing and trying to keep the conversation going.

“Ah, yes, once it’s drained, it’s edible. If we tried to eat the jam-yams raw, while they still had their juice inside, well … let’s just say we’d pay for it the next day. They’re too rich, too sweet, to eat raw. Once drained, we can chop up the yam and cook them like sweet-potatoes. Uh … we might actually be better served frying them with the sweet water-cress and mushrooms we’ve found …” Planning what would be the best way to wring the most food out of their haul, Twilight became so focused on the task ahead she forgot what she was doing now, and began to drift, until her musing ended with a shock.

“Twilight!” Twilight jolted back to reality when she heard Luna’s shocked cry, and realised she’d almost walked off a ledge. The swirling, murky waters of the Everfree’s river burbled and churned a good twenty meters below her hooves, and Celestia and the Royal Guard’s recent encounters with the Hydras came rushing back into her mind.

“Oh … ponyfeathers!” Shaking in fear, Twilight inched back from the ledge a few steps before Luna grabbed her from behind and dragged the younger Alicorn back to the dubious safety of the forest.

“Are you okay? What were you thinking! One minute, you’re right next to me, the next you’re trying to walk off a cliff?” Luna snapped as she held the trembling Twilight against her, furious at herself for not paying more attention, and horrified at what had nearly happened.

“I … I was just thinking how we could prepare dinner … I wasn’t watching where … oh Celestia, I could have ...” Shaking with the after-effects of her shock, Twilight hugged Luna back and gave a choked sob.

For several minutes they remained like that, hidden under the shadows of the forest as Twilight slowly calmed down.

For once, there was no awkwardness untangling themselves from the embrace, or when Luna wrapped a wing around Twilight’s shoulders as they plodded back to camp.

The reality of their situation had finally started to sink in. With Canterlot full of hostile Nobles and scheming News-Ponies who would slander them both for a single week of good ratings, they had nobody they could rely on but each other now. Even their loyal friends in Ponyville held the potential to let slip the secret and ruin both Princesses in the eyes of the Ponies.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lunch, (or was it brunch?), was quiet, broken only by the occasional murmured comment from one Alicorn or another and the soft sounds of their eating.

“I never thought yams cooked over a camp-fire would taste so good.” Luna said softly, smiling as she nibbled at the last piece of roasted yam held between her hooves. It was almost like eating sweet potato, but … tangier.

Twilight didn’t respond for several moments, and Luna drew breath to try to rekindle the conversation when the purple Alicorn shook herself and replied. “Well, up until a few months ago, I didn’t know either. After Trixie returned with the Alicorn Amulet and took over Ponyville, Zecora helped train me on when to use magic, and when to use my wits, and she showed me how to prepare them.”

Wiping her hooves on the rock she was seated upon, Twilight sighed, straightened her back and gave Luna a wan smile. “There’s so much about the Everfree Forest that Ponies don’t want to know about because it’s not ‘controlled’. Every time I come here, I find something new, or rather, something old that my books have labelled as myth, or lost for all time.”

“Twilight, the eternal book-worm, enjoys mucking about in the Everfree Forest?” Luna asked in mock-horror, raising a hoof to her mouth in an exaggerated fashion, causing Twilight to snicker and shake her head in denial.

“Not … quite. I just love how I can come out here, and I can find a flower nobody has ever seen, or an animal thought long extinct … it made me think how limited our knowledge of the world outside of Equestria’s borders really is.” Twilight rambled, explaining how she had found medicinal herbs to transplant back to Ponyville, but had been thwarted by Applejack’s venerable, and stubborn, grandmother, Granny Smith, who had declared the plants were weeds that the Apple family had been driving back ever since they had settled Ponyville, and then promptly drowned the herbs in enough poison to make an Ent sick.

How Twilight had then gone back, recovered another sample and brought it back secretly, cultivating it slowly and painfully in the planter on her windowsill before having enough to send samples on to Canterlot and Manehattan to more learned researchers.

“Wait a minute. Twilight, are you telling me you are the Pony that rediscovered the Mother’s Touch?” Luna asked softly when Twilight stopped to draw breath. “That … that herb has a very special meaning to Celestia and myself. Sadly when Equestria was being founded, several of our more … petty rivals for the Thrones had decided that if they could not stop our ascension, they would steal all our joy from the positions. They, amongst other things, burned our private gardens to ashes, plants that had existed no-where else in the land by that time, herbs and medicinal flowers we had used to treat injured Ponies and the other races...”

Twilight nodded slowly, eyes very wide as Luna leaned back and took a deep, shuddering breath.

“I see. Maybe some of the seeds escaped the blaze. Or maybe they thought to steal the herbs for themselves and lost them to fate?” Luna muttered, her eyes half-closed as she thought back to those gardens, a place where Celestia and herself had demanded absolute privacy, a place where they could go and talk, even fight in the way many sisters do, without the squabbling, fractured nobility of the three Pony tribes trying to drive wedges between them or usurp the Alicorns’ powers for themselves.

“Luna?” Twilight’s voice sounded very soft, but very close, and when Luna opened her eyes, she saw that Twilight had come around the camp-fire to sit at Luna’s side, looking very nervous and timid. “Did I … do the right thing? If it really was so important to you and Princess Celestia, maybe I should have just sent them directly to the Castle?”

For a minute, Luna was silent, trying to find the words to speak, to correctly convey her thoughts.

“No. No, you did the right thing, Twilight. For far too long, the Mother’s Touch has been lost. It’s far too vital a medicinal herb to be left in the Everfree Forest because of any bitterness on the part of Celestia or myself, about enemies long since dead and forgotten by the very Ponies they desired to rule.” The Lunar Princess shook herself as if cold, and gave a wan smile of her own to Twilight. “It is probably not much, compared to the medicine of today, but perhaps Ponies of this era might extract whatever healing elements reside within the herb and make newer, more potent medicines.”

“Well, I do know there were quite a few Ponies who were delighted to receive the samples I sent them. Several of them are involved in a plan to catalogue all known medicinal plants and herbs, and their predecessors had long since written the Mother’s Touch off as a myth.” Twilight pointed out, trying to make Luna smile again. “I’m sure they’d love to speak to you about what the Herb was used for back in your … era … oh my, that does sound rude, doesn’t it?”

Yet Luna just laughed.

“Not really, Twilight. You’ll find, as you grow into your powers and your status as an Alicorn, that ‘age’ and ‘era’ have different meanings to you than a normal Pony.” The Lunar Princess explained, an honest smile on her face now. “I may have spent a thousand years on the moon, but I am still ‘in’ my Era … although I will admit some of today’s customs are a little … bold, by my standards.”

“Oh?” Twilight asked, leaning forwards eagerly. While she considered Luna a good friend, learning more about what the shy and socially awkward Princess thought could only help deepen their friendship.

“Ah. Well, I mean … back before my banishment, there was no gender imbalance, and the same-gender relationships that Equestria sees today was considered a very … very shameful thing.” Coughing and turning slightly darker under her fur, Luna kept her eyes focused on the dwindling camp-fire, poking the burning pieces of wood with a prod of magic. “A-a-a-and there’s the whole matter of the Nobility! I cannot understand why Celestia has let them grow so arrogant and dismissive of the other Ponies! And then …”

It was going to be a long rant, it seemed, but Twilight smiled and kept her ears open, absorbing it all.

She was a good friend, after all, and friends listened to each other, no matter what.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I apologise for the delay, my little Ponies. A … matter of state came up that I had to deal with immediately.” Celestia beamed down at the courtiers and supplicants of the Afternoon Court from her throne, her mane lustrous and waving with a life of its own, her features at once serene and joyous.

Many attributed it simply to Celestia being back amongst her beloved subjects. A few wondered if perhaps the Solar Princess was revelling in being the only Princess in Canterlot once again. A handful wondered if they should mention if, self-moving mane or not, Celestia’s hair looked like it had been ruffled vigorously and then hurriedly brushed.

I needed that. Celestia thought to herself, smirking in her mind’s eye as she thought back to the encounter with Discord in her private chambers. It had been far, far too long since she had indulged her feminine side, and Discord had been a fulfilling, if panicked, consort.

Oh buck it all, he had been tolerable at best and she’d had to tie him to the bed to stop him trying to escape the first time, but Celestia had centuries worth of ‘repression’ to deal with, and it had been his fault, after all ….

And if the Ponies noticed that the subtle amount of makeup Celestia used was smudged slightly, or that her crown and royal garments sat a little crooked, or why her chambers were still surrounded by an anti-magic field strong enough to keep Faust herself out, they thankfully did not ask why.

I think I’ll cancel Night Court today. I’ve still got a fair bit of stress to deal with, and it’s so cute to see Discord squeal like that!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“There it is again!” Flutteryshy squeaked, jumping to her hooves and startling the other Ponies at the food-court, making Rarity sigh and delicately face-hoof once more.

“Darling! I don’t know just what is going on, but I assure you, nobody else is hearing it!” The white-coated Unicorn snapped, going shrill with frustration. “Nobody else can hear this ‘voice’ you speak of! Are you sure you haven’t run into a patch of Poison Joke again?”

“N-not that I can remember … ooooh! I wish Twilight was here, she’d know what was going on!”

Chapter 6

CHAPTER 6

“Nnnngh! Hnnnnngh! Grrrrrnnnnnnnnnggggghhh!” Groaning and straining, the Aspect of Chaos struggled to prise the window open, but the adamantite frame and glas-steel panel refused his efforts, his claws blunted after many unsuccessful attempts to escape.

Who knew Celestia had so much pent-up frustrations? Or that she had written the book on Pony Sutra?

Or that, when pushed, she would turn into some sort of molestation goddess and overpower him! Him! Discord! Lord of Chaos and Change! Stuck in one form, imprisoned in a bedroom and likely awaiting another round of ‘crush the Demi-God’ with Celestia’s tush when she finished with her boring, orderly court-duties.

“Oh, I’m just glad that Tirek and the others can’t see me now.” The serpentine chimera moped, trudging back to sit on the edge of the bed, which had been abused so hard the legs had snapped off, the headboard had been broken in two and the bed itself lay on the floor, the clouds that made up the mattress smelling strongly of vanilla and chocolate milk.

And the rest of the furniture wasn’t in a good state either. Discord had had no idea one could use a bookshelf in that way, or that a set of drawers had so many uses in Pony Sutra …

Surrounded by the magic-disrupting properties of Celestia’s spell of negation, his ability to teleport was severely limited and there was only so much Chaos one could cause in a single room without magic. And the thought of just up and walking out the door of their beloved Princess’s bedroom, in full view of everypony, might upset Celestia at the ‘scandal’ of him seen leaving her bedrooms, and Discord quailed at the thought of what Celestia might do to him for that.

“Of course … she’d have to catch me …” Discord said aloud, tapping a blunted talon against his lips in thought. “No, best not to risk it, but maybe a small rebellion? I’ll go mad if I have to sit here all day with nothing to do! I’ve not sat still and done nothing since … since … actually, I don’t think I’ve ever done that!”

Yet as his eagle-like arm reached for a scroll that lay within easy reach, jutting up from a pile of kindling that had once been a book-shelf, Discord’s mind betrayed him, recalling Celestia’s hind-quarters dropping down onto his face, an all-consuming, implacable foe, that blocked out all light and vision, and the overwhelming scent of vanilla in his nose and mouth …

“Of course there’s a first time for everything, yes? I-I couldn’t very well call myself the Aspect of Chaos if I didn’t experience everything every now and again, right?” Snatching back his arm as if the scroll had turned into a venomous serpent, the Chimeric Aspect wrapped himself in his tail and burrowed deep into the cloud-mattress, plugging his nose with the tufts of hair from the end of his tail and closing his eyes, trying to think of happy, chaotic thoughts.

I’ll never be able to eat anything with vanilla essence in it ever again.

The lumpy clouds over the buried aspect shuddered in response to that thought, Discord writhing in a maelstrom of emotions.

Draconequs didn’t mate because there was only supposed to be one of them in a particular layer of reality at a time, and One would become Two if a layer of reality divided itself so that each new reality had its own Draconequs, as momentous events were want to do to the multiverse. And since all the realities of the multiverse were stacked upon each other, much like layers in an onion, gender was something Draconequs gave themselves as a way of exploring their own personal takes on Chaos, or more often, to mess with the local mortals.

Celestia and Luna had been females, so he had taken on a male gender to irritate them. That and the socially ‘dominant’ gender at the time had been stallions, and whoo had it been a kick to mess with them as well …

And right now, Discord was kicking himself, both literally and metaphorically, for not exploring that avenue thousands of years ago. During his reign in the past, he’d had a cult of Ponies worshipping him. He could have had so much fun with this ‘sex’ thing if only he’d known!

In fact, he was kicking himself so hard that he fell out of the bed, tangled up in the cloud-sheets and landed on the floor, and saw something rather odd.

No, not the Itallion Stallion, he’d seen enough of that to last an eternity. A large book, with a cover made of dark, age-stained wood and faded red silk bindings.

It had likely been hidden in the bedside cabinet, before the enforced molestation had knocked it over, and in a fit of rebellion, Discord grasped the book with his lion’s paw and dragged it over to himself and flipped the cover over.

He’d seen enough decrees stating that he was to be left alone to recognise Celestia’s hoofwriting, but this book seemed … cruder, somehow. It was obviously Celestia’s writing, but the words were smaller, less elegant, even scratched out in places.

A grimoire? A novel? Discord wondered as he read the first few pages. As he read on, however, it seemed he’d come across Celestia’s filly-hood diary.

Chortles of delight soon gave way to engrossed silence, and then a scowl crossed Discord’s chimeric face.

He’d never truly paid much attention to the Pony Tribes until he’d discovered that sentient life was much more fun to mess with than elemental forces or dumb, mute animals.

He’d always ignored the founding of Equestria. Boring, trivial orderly stuff.

But the picture painted by the Celestia of that distant, brutal past both intrigued and infuriated him. It had been the presence of the Windigos that had first alerted him to the existence of Ponykind while he had been meddling with the warring Lion and Eagle Tribes, literally weaving the two armies together during their last, greatest struggle, melding pairs of combatants into composite wholes to create the first Gryphons.

Of course, he’d always intended to go back and undo the transformation, it was only a prank to get the two proud, arrogant Races to stop their distasteful slaughter of each other and focus on his pranks, but the confusion, the disbelief and the Chaos of the aftermath as the newly created race struggled to reconcile the memories and personalities of the bitter, mortal enemies that made up their constituent pieces had intoxicated him, and then the maelstrom of disharmony from the lush, green lands to the south had dragged his attention away.

I never was much good at following up. Discord thought sadly as he felt a twinge of guilt. Accursed Ponies. Teaching me how to feel empathy and friendship, I shouldn’t feel like this.

But Celestial’s diary told a story that the history books had conveniently omitted, a story of the Ponies that had lived in Equestria long before the three ‘Tribes’ that would eventually come to the land, bringing their conflict and discord with them, and the Windigos trailing in their wake.

It told the story of a little filly, considered a freak and the bringer of ill-fortune by her superstitious people for her physical deformities, centuries before the invaders led by Chancellor Puddinghead, Princess Platinum and Commander Hurricane would lead their bickering people to the untamed lands that would become Equestria.

And despite himself, Discord found himself unable to stop reading, turning each of the delicate, age-yellowed pages with extreme care, his free talon clenching into the cloud-sheet in anger as he read on.

Celestia, what did you do?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everfree Forest, Day 1, 10pm

I think I am getting used to this.

It was an odd thought, but Twilight found herself thinking odd thoughts a lot these days.

Like, how come Alicorns were bigger than normal Ponies. What purpose did it serve?

Why was it that the Everfree created such wild, discordant magical effects without anypony doing anything?

How was Celestia able to obtain, let alone bottle, raw Dragonfire, if Spike was the only known Dragon in Equestria’s borders sociable enough to oblige and was absent from Canterlot for months on end?

And how in the name of bucking Equestria had Luna ended up on Twilight’s side of the tent, and why was she hugging Twilight so tightly in her sleep?

Not that it was a completely bad thing. Without the thick walls of a building, the night air of the forest was bitterly cold, even with the thick thermal blankets the two Alicorns had bought with them, the inside of the tent was chilly.

Yes, just keep thinking that it’s only the temperature that’s the reason to be held by somepony ….

Aaaaaaaand you can go buck yourself, inner voice. Twilight firmly told her mind, which responded with a petulant mental raspberry before submitting.

Unfortunately, every time Twilight tried to wriggle loose, Luna would mumble in her sleep and hug Twilight back to her chest again.

I wonder if this is how Miss Smartypants felt like when I used to sleep with her? The image of the ragged stuffed doll brought a smile to Twilight’s face, and then another blush when she realised it was still in the hooves of Big Mac. Oooooh-kay! Do not need to think of Big Mac in bed, cuddling something with my scent on it … tttttthat’s not something I am thinking about right now! No. NO. Clean thoughts. Dry thoughts. Not now!

But it was … pleasant. To be held. Even by another Mare. At least it was one of her friends, and Luna was so … adorkable? Was it wrong for Twilight, of all Ponies, to refer to somepony else with that term?

I can just imagine Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie having conniptions if I ever said that out loud in front of them ... Twilight couldn’t help but grin as she imagined the teasing she’d receive. Oh … oh what the hay. Why not?

And so, hesitantly, Twilight snuck a leg over Luna’s side and returned the embrace. For a few moments, there was no reaction, then Luna mumbled something low and happy-sounding in her sleep, nearly crushed Twilight with a sleeping hug and finally relaxed enough that Twilight could breath again.

One thing I don’t get … Twilight thought to herself as sleep began tugging on the back of her mind once again. Luna’s supposed to be mostly nocturnal … how come she’s able to sleep at night so easily then?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Diiiiiiiiiiis-cord?” Celestia whispered, creeping into her bedroom, more than a little nervous.

Would he be angry? Night Court had sadly been unable to be cancelled, due to the overwhelming number of Nobles petitioning her for this and that, all of which were small, petty and foolish, but given the state of the Court …

There was a muffled curse, the clatter of wood against stone, and then Discord’s head popped up from under the ruins of her bed, a cheeky grin on his face.

“Sooooo, my dearest captor returns!” Discord crooned, his head and neck swaying from side to side like one of the cobras of distant Saddle Arabia, being enchanted by one of the snake-charmer’s flutes. “What now, oh ‘Molestia’?”

“I … actually don’t know.” Celestia admitted, pushing the door half-closed behind her. “I did want to apologise for taking advantage of you like I did, but I als-ssaaahaaa!”

Celestia’s yelp came from the tip of Discord’s long, serpentine tail sneaking along the floor to brush over her teats, sneaking up between her hind-legs and brushing the soft furred tip back and forth across the pink nipples.

“Oh but Cellie, I should be thanking you. All this time, and I never bothered with something so … messy and fun!” Discord chortled as Celestia danced from hoof to hoof, torn between laughter and rebukes as the Chimeric Aspect used his tail to gently tease Celestia away from the door, and a small shape rushed out the doors to freedom.

Celestia’s magical spell was powerful, but Discord had spent most of the day reading her ancient diary and focusing on a rather old trick of his, taking a single piece from each of his component body-parts, a sliver of horn, a piece of fur or tiny scale, and binding them together with a drop of blood to make a Familiar that would track down the one Pony he felt could give him the opening he needed.

It was old magic, a very primitive and crude form of blood magic, and he had gambled that Celestia’s spell, even as powerful as it was, would have been too complex to be able to detect and neutralize his work.

And as Celestia, still laughing and half-heartedly telling Discord to stop, collapsed on the remains of the bed next to him, Discord quickly distracted her with the rest of his body, while his tail swept back and carefully, quietly, pushed the diary back under the shattered remains of the furniture as Celestia’s magic surged once more and reinforced the anti-magic barrier around the room, slamming the doors shut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5:25 am

When Twilight woke up again, midnight had passed, yet the dawn was still so very far away, and Twilight found herself willing to risk a little boldness as Luna woke up when Twilight tried to move into a more comfortable position and immediately froze, going rigid against Twilight’s body in shock.

“Luna … we need to talk about our … problem. Could we have our lesson inside the tent, where we’ve got some privacy?” Twilight asked softly, resisting the urge to laugh as Luna’s rigidity turned into outright trembling.

“I … I … I guess so. B-but why are you in my bed …” Luna stammered, her dark fur barely hiding the blush that was raging across her face right now.

“Uh, actually, that’s another thing I wanted to say. You’re in my bed, Luna.” Twilight pointed out, trying very to not laugh as Luna’s trembling doubled in strength. “Uhm … Luna?”

“B-bathroom!” Luna squeaked, untangling herself from Twilight violently, before rushing out of the tent, tail billowing out behind her like a cloud.

Did … did I just send the Lunar Princess fleeing out into the night? Twilight wondered, half horrified, half amazed. It looks like we’re both worried about the physical side-effects we’re suffering from the Sympathy between us. Pleasure when our magics mingle, shared sensations when our horns touch … what’s next?

But that treacherous train of thought did give Twilight an idea. Levitating an ornate, carved wooden box to her side, the young Alicorn opened the lid and removed the two ‘Bracers’ from within the silk-lined insides, grimacing as her hooves tingled from the feel of the cold iron, and another tingle from her horn as her magic-sensitive organ felt the strange aura that radiated from the relics.

If Celestia is right, if we each wear a Shackle, and have Empathy’s Core nearby, any overflow of magic will be stored within the Core. Meaning that rather than sparking each other silly, we c-can … ooooh why did I use that term! Twilight’s dry analysis turned damp as soon as she said ‘sparked’, remembering the sensations as she and Luna held each other during the incident in Celestia’s bed all too keenly.

And yet you liked it. A small voice in the back of Twilight’s head remarked.

You stay out of this! I could lose Luna as a friend! This has to be handled right, or else … Twilight snapped back at the inner voice, furious at herself. I like Luna! She’s a good friend, and … and she’s wonderful! I don’t want to lose that!

Who said you’d lose her. She likes it too, you know that. You felt that. The voice replied snarkily, and images of Lyra and Bon Bon flashed into her mind for a moment. It’s not a bad thing to love another Mare. Lots of Mares do it.

Yes, it is strange that we have so many Mares, and so few Stallions ... Twilight replied to her inner voice, recalling the many theories on the gender-imbalance and too emotional to realise she was fulfilling the first sign of madness. I know a lot of Mares end up either having Foals on their own without partners, or in same-sex relationships …

See? You like Luna, you share a lot of interests, and the Sympathy between you will inevitably result in more … encounters between you both. Surely it would be best to clear the air between you …

That … does make a kind of sense. But … wait, no! We’re just friends! Just. Friends. We just … had a … oh … oh my …

Twilight clapped both hooves to her face and whimpered, trying to will the memories of Luna’s body thrashing beneath her own to go away.

This is just … all kinds of strange! I never actually thought about relationships like this before. I mean, I always thought someday I’d have my special somepony, but … like this? Because of our magical resonance? It just …

*snap*

Did … did I just call Luna my ‘special somepony’? Auuugh! AUUUUUUUGH! Twilight screamed internally, rolling back and forth under the covers in mental agony. Wait, this is so sudden! It’s just the Sympathy messing with my head! Our heads! I’m not a Filly-Fooler … am I?

Twilight’s only hope was that whoever this mysterious Pony that Luna kept referring to would arrive soon and give both Luna and herself somepony to focus on other than each other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

6:30 am ….

The remaining members of the Element Bearers had gathered in the library, home of their absent friend, well before most of Ponyville was out of their homes, let alone beds, intending to have a talk about the current situation without letting other ponies in on the topic, a difficult enough task these days with the usual gossip-mongers of Ponyville all snooping around their homes and businesses.

They could only hope the early hour of the day, the thick, living walls of Twilight’s tree-library, and the sound-muffling enchantments Twilight had laid into the walls to prevent the usual noise of the town disturbing her when she was working, would be enough to keep most of the snoops in the dark.

“Well gosh darn it, this is jus’ perfect!” Applejack snapped, slamming her empty mug of coffee down on the table of Twilight’s kitchen, ignoring the flinch from Fluttershy. “Yesterday, Big Mac up an’ leaves me to fix the barn roof all on my own, an’ he makes off with our wagon without so much as a word to me or Granny Smith in the process, then Time Turner goes missing an’ Derpy rides that thunder-cloud of hers through half the houses in Ponyville looking for him, an’ now you’re saying that you’ve got a … a Mini-Discord living with you?”

“Uhm, yes. I don’t know exactly how Discord did it, but he made a smaller … well, Discord to ask me for help with some sort of bush, but he was so frantic he wasn’t making any sense at all … even for Discord! But when I brought him some vanilla-flavoured tea to calm him down, the poor dear had a fit right on the spot!” Fluttershy replied meekly, fidgeting in place in the library. “I wish he’d tell me what actually happened, he’s not making any sense … well, less than he normally does. Something about a plot that’s out to get him and the need to fight, or find, a bush of some kind.”

“I … think you mean a ‘plot to get him’, deary.” Rarity replied, tittering.

“No, I’m positive he was screaming about a ‘plot that’s out to get him’ after he went and hid in my sock-drawer. I did say he was making even less sense than usual.” The yellow Pegasus explained, giving a small shrug at the latest bout of weirdness from her chaotic friend.

“Ugh, okay, enough about Dip-cord. More importantly, where the buck are all the Stallions in town going?” Rainbow Dash shot up onto her hooves, pacing angrily in a circle around her friends. “First Big Mac ditches a job. Big Mac. Ditching. It just doesn’t happen. And then secondly, Time Turner goes away without taking Derpy with him? I thought they were joined at the Cutie Marks these days?”

“I’ll say! It’s totally crazy, and even I don’t know what’s going on!” Pinkie Pie added, pausing only to literally inhale a donut before continuing. “I was hoping my Pinkie-Sense would clue me in to what’s happening, but nada! Nothing! Zilch! I know something’s up, but I’m not getting anything on my radar!”

“Well … I guess I should tell you guys that I delivered a letter to Big Mac yesterday morning.” Spike commented from the kitchen, where he was making cups of coffee for everyone. “It’s weird, I never knew Big Mac and the Princess were pen-pals!”

The hiss of five Mares all gasping in surprise was all the warning Spike had before the world exploded into the clatter of hooves on the polished wooden floors of the Library and then the dull thump of those same hooves onto Spike himself, pushing the baby Dragon down onto the kitchen floor.

“WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?” Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie all roared at once, with Apple Jack spluttering in shock, holding a fainted Fluttershy in her hooves.

“Aaaah! I … I don’t know! I just got a letter for Big Mac, which hasn’t happened in months, and when I went out the door to go deliver it to Apple Acres, Big Mac was walking up the street towards the Library! That’s all I know, I swear!” Spike blubbered, scratching vainly at the floor to get away from the three sets of hooves that had him pinned down.

“Of all the … dang it girls! Let the young ‘un up!” Applejack yelled over the bickering Ponies as she gently put Fluttershy down on the floor, then resorted to manually pulling the three Mares off of Spike.

Rainbow dash was the easiest to pull off Spike, reeling back into shock once her initial spike of anger had worn off, but it was a challenge, even for Applejack’s great strength, to pull Rarity off of Spike, the fashionista demanding all the ‘juicy details’ and babbling about ‘scandals’.

“Aaaaand why didn’t you tell me sooner that Big Mac had a pen-pal! I could have thrown him a ‘congratulations on getting a pen-pal’ party!” Pinkie demanded, the last to be pulled off spike, clinging to the baby Dragon like chewing-gum caught between a hoof and the ground before finally ‘snapping’ off, causing her and Applejack to fly backwards into the Library proper and knock several shelves worth of books onto the floor.

“This … this is unheard of! The Princess of a Nation and a Commoner? Oh heavens, what a scandal! What an uproar! How romaaaaaaantic!” Rarity squealed, heedless of the dirty looks being shot her way by everyone else as she held her hooves to her cheeks and blushed furiously.

“Uh … Rarity, I don’t think it was that kind of letter. I just handed it over to Big Mac, he read it, then gave it back to me and headed back to the Apple farm. He wasn’t even nervous.” Spike replied, grunting as he ran a claw over the sore parts of his body, no doubt the start of several large, hoof-shaped bruises under his scales.

“An’ mah brother ain’t the kind of Pony that’d be taking a Mare for a roll in the hay without marryin’ her first, an’ since we ain’t heard ‘bout no second Royal Weddin’, you can jus’ plain forget that lil’ fantasy, Rarity!” The peach-coloured farm-pony snapped in turn, her mind filling with a fantasy of very nervous Big Mac and a hilariously pregnancy-bloated Celestia walking down the aisle, with the entire Equestrian Royal Guard walking behind them, shotguns aimed square at Big Mac’s back.

“Letter, letter, where is the letter!” Rarity demanded, a frightening gleam in her eyes. “Spikey-wikey, we need to see that letter!”

“Now wait just one apple-pickin’ minute! That there’s private cor-es-pon-dence ‘tween my brother an’ Princess Celestia! No pony’s got the right to snoop on that!” Applejack protested, trying to get between Rarity and Spike, but the baby Dragon was already deep in the clutches of his crush and had rushed away to find the letter, leaving a spluttering Applejack and a sparkly-eyed Rarity behind.

“Look, Applejack, I get where you’re coming from, but maybe you should try looking at it from our point of view!” The cyan-blue Rainbow Dash pointed out, angrily, as she slammed a hoof onto the floor and made both Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie squeak and flinch away. “Twilight’s off pony-knows-where, with Luna of all Ponies, and we haven’t seen her in weeks! Yeah, the gossip magazines gave her a pounding, but isn’t it our duty as her friends to be there and support her?”

“Well ah … ah guess we should know where she is, jus’ in case of an emergency.” Applejack conceded after several moments of thought. “But don’t y’all forget, Princess Celestial invoked a royal decree on this. I don’ think bein’ the Elements of Harmony’s gonna get us outta this pickle if she done finds out!”

“Yeah yeah, whatever. Spike, you got that letter yet?” The rainbow-maned Mare snorted, in an obviously foul mood as the baby Dragon came rushing down the stairs, holding the offending letter aloft in one claw.

“Yep, got it right here!” Spike replied, still grinning foolishly, no doubt in the grip of some fantasy involving Rarity right now.

“Good. Now gimme!” Snatching the letter away, Rainbow Dash took to her wings, hovering just out of everypony’s reach as she read the letter with a furious scowl on her face. “T-the … what the bu … are you kid … oh for … aaaaaaaaugh!”

“Rainbow Dash! You will give me that letter this instant!” Rarity demanded, pouting that she wasn’t the first to read it and jumping up and down, trying to grab one of Rainbow Dash’s legs and pull the Pegasus down to ground.

“I … I think this is a really bad idea …” Fluttershy mumbled, sighing as nobody paid any attention as the squabbling over the letter got worse and worse.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

7:10am

The feel of the cold shackle around her right fore-hoof, and the subtle tingling of the enchantments within the crude pig-iron device attuning themselves to her own magical resonance made Luna shiver with a barely-suppress whine of fear.

Out of concern for what might happen, Luna had lowered the moon and stars early, leaving the sky bare of all celestial bodies until Celestia’s sun had begun to creep over the horizon. It had pained her to do so, but the risk …

Many times in the history of Equestria had the Shackles of Starswirl been misused, and Luna herself had once been a victim of the Shackles, a Unicorn she had rejected from the position of Royal Consort having used the Shackles to drain a significant portion of her magical energies and attempted to turn himself into an Alicorn, mistakenly believing Luna's magical energy came from the same source as her ability to raise and lower the Night Sky, and all it contained.

Celestia had come running, full of rage and righteous indignation with the Royal Guard of that era vainly trying to keep up with their enraged Princess. Before the Guards had caught up to their leader, the Princesses had left that cave together, in tears, leaving the mewling, pitiful thing the once-proud and cruel Unicorn had warped himself into to die alone from the fatally flawed transformation spell.

Even though Twilight had been more than willing for Luna to wear the ‘Master’ shackle, the mere thought of such sorcery on her person caused the Lunar Princess no end of trepidation.

Even though the Twilight has been so gracious to let me wear the Master shackle, I still feel … nervous. What if this doesn’t work? What if Twilight is harmed by my power? And what happens if we have another … episode? Can our friendship survive it?

“Okay … I think the Shackles are ready, we’ve gone through all the rituals and the scrolls we have on hoof. Are you ready, Luna?” Twilight asked, holding her left fore-hoof up and staring hard at the Shackle she wore. In-front of the two Princesses was the pumpkin-sized cube of rose quartz, known as Empathy’s Core, which would hopefully absorb the excess magic the two created when they experienced a ‘Sympathy’ towards each other.

If it worked, they’d not have to worry about their magics over-lapping and causing … issues.

If it didn’t, they were in for a long haul in the Everfree Forest, until they could manually control the ‘side effects’ that the Sympathy caused them.

If Twilight and I cannot cast spells around each other without linking up like this, I fear that we may have to remain separate from each other forever … Luna thought to herself, feeling an ache in her heart at the thought of never being able to be around Twilight again, her first real friend in over a thousand years …

“As I will ever be, Twilight. I know only the theory on how the Shackles work, but from the scrolls Celestia gave to us, the magic should be fairly intuitive to use.” Luna replied softly, repressing the urge to once again flee the tent, and the smaller Alicorn whom was distressingly, and intoxicatingly, pressed firmly against Luna’s side under the blankets. “We will start with a small test, and work our way up from there. We will both attempt to feed Empathy’s Core a small trickle of our magic, and then see what the result is.”

“Sounds safe enough …” Twilight added, giving a nervous grin before her horn began to glow with her pale lavender magic, and then Luna made her own horn glow with her dusky, translucent blue magic, the two Alicorns leaning down to the cube of pink quartz and placing their horns on the artefact, willing their magic into it.

As before, both Mares flinched as arcs of their magic snapped from one horn to another, but both did their best to ignore the sensations the Sympathy caused them, focusing their attentions solely on Empathy’s Core.

And after close to a minute of effort, Empathy’s Core remained annoyingly devoid of magic despite their efforts. The magic literally slid right off the surface of the rose quartz like water off a duck’s back.

“Maybe we have to focus our magic through the Shackles?” Twilight ventured as both Princesses stopped trying to channel their magic into the artefact and re-read the scrolls on the Empathy’s Core crystal.

“I … don’t think that will work. Their function is to act as a focus, a lodestone to draw the Core’s ability towards us, not … oh. Oh no.” Luna muttered as she re-read her scroll, dread creeping into her voice as she came to a dreadful realisation. “I know why the Core isn’t reacting to our magic.”

“What? Why? How?” Luna flinched as one of Twilight’s wings reached across her back and gave Luna a gentle shake after the Lunar Princess didn’t speak for several seconds. “Luna, what did you think of?”

“We … our magic wasn’t … oh this is … Twilight, I’m so sorry!” Luna tried to escape Twilight’s grip, but caught on the verge of a new discovery, the younger Alicorn’s grip was like that of a lamprey. I’ll drag us both into the Everfree River before she relents! “Empathy’s Core didn’t react to our magic because it wasn’t mingled. The artefact was designed to absorb two types of magic that have been melded together by a Sympathy. We need to … do that for the Core to work.”

Blushing furiously, Luna watched as Twilight absorbed the news, going from confusion to open-mouthed shock, and then spluttering understanding.

“S-s-ssso we spark each other, an-and see what the Core does?” Twilight mumbled, unable to look Luna in the face, but not retracting her wing from across Luna’s back.

“If we are fortunate, the Core will absorb the excess magic the sparking will create, leaving us with clear minds and an abundant source of magic to draw upon while our own natural reserves restore themselves.” Luna replied softly, biting her lower lip in thought … before extending one of her own wings across Twilight’s back. “The moment we ca … can’t endure it anymore, we stop, alright?”

“That’s … that’s a good plan. It’s just … I never thought I’d be … that we’d … I just never thought I swung that way, you know?” The younger Alicorn whispered, shaking at Luna’s side, her primary flight feathers digging deep into Luna’s fur.

“It’s not as if we are filly-foolers, Twilight. I … I know Equestria has come a long way since my banishment, but I still believe we are both normal Mares, it’s just that our magic is … sympathetic to each other. Not that being attracted to other Mares is a ... it does not mean I don’t feel … oh pony-feathers, I’m not making this any better.” Luna huffed, stumbling over conflicting thoughts, stopping herself before she said something embarrassingly definitive.

Is it really so bad to feel that way with another Mare? That inner voice asked again.

Buck! OFF! Luna retorted angrily.

“Alright, on the count of three, then?” Twilight offered, as Luna nodded and gently bent her horn to line up with Twilight’s own, both spiralling horns glowing softly with their owner’s own unique magical energies.

“One …” Luna whispered, inching closer.

“T-two …” Twilight said in a trembling voice as she lifted her horn upwards to meet Luna’s.

“Three …!” The two Mares said together as their horn-tips came into contact, and arcs of magical energy began snapping between their horns.

Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

10am, same day …

Stoically ignoring the inane and constant chatter from his little sister and her friends, Big Mac scowled as he considered the wagon, full of food he’d bought using the bits Princess Celestia had quietly sent to him via the Mail-Ponies and a box of ‘spare parts’, and the path he had intended to take to the Castle of the Pony Sisters.

Honestly, he wondered what Applejack would do if she ever realised that the new farm tools he ‘bought’ were instead payment from Princess Celestia for the barrels of ‘Black Label’ Apple Cider he kept back every year for the ‘mystery buyer’. And this time she’d sent a crate of spare parts, with a chest of bits hidden under a layer of spare bolts and nuts.

Whatever had set the Timber-Wolves howling in the Forest during the night had panicked them so badly that they’d abandoned their physical forms and fled to hide in living trees, leaving the path strewn with a tangled wall of logs, vines, tree-branches and worse, and without the proper tools, it was going to be impossible to get to the Castle of the Pony Sisters with the wagon.

It was going to take hours, if not the whole damn day, to get this mess out of the way, especially if he had to do it himself.

“Awwww … wait, maybe we can be Cutie Mark Crusader Lumber-Jacks!” Applebloom shouted eagerly from behind him, the danger-prone trio having followed him despite his many attempts to get them to go away.

“Nnnnope!” Big Mac replied emphatically, looking back over his shoulder and giving the three Fillies his sternest look. There was no way in H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks he was going to let those three get anywhere near sharp objects.

“Awwww, but brother …” The little filly begged, giving him her best ‘puppy dog’ eyes.

“We can help, really! We want to go see Zecora and hear about her homeland! Miss Cherilee said it’d make a great addition to show-and-tell!” Sweetie Bell added, the little Unicorn all but bouncing up and down in excitement.

“Ah. Said. Nnnope!” The huge Stallion put his foot down, both figuratively and literally. “Gonna need the tools for this mess. An’ you ain’t usin’ no axes.”

“Aaaaaaawwwww.” The three little Fillies all whined, looking crestfallen.

The Princess ain’t gonna be happy ‘bout this. Big Mac sighed heavily, already thinking about what tools would be easiest to break up the tangled mess on the path, the Cutie Mark Crusaders having forgotten their disappointment and had begun chattering excitedly as they came up with new, more hair-raising methods of discovering their Cutie Marks. An’ ahm gonna have to ask fer somepony to give me a hand, an’ they’re gonna want to know why ahm taking a wagon of perfectly good food into the Everfree Forest. Nope, the Princess ain’t gonna like this one bit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the same time …

How did one speak to a friend after a bout of raw passion? What did you say in the aftermath of a good hard rutting?

Good morning? Good job? I’m so sorry? Or did you just kiss them and hope for the best?

Luna found herself wondering just how she would greet Twilight when she awoke, the newest Princess of Equestria still asleep and cuddling Luna like she was a giant teddy-bear. How could she talk to Twilight without blurting out something embarrassing, or offending her, or worse still ….

Is Twilight really the problem, or is it you? Luna’s infernal inner voice decided to offer its two bits at that moment, much to the Lunar Princess’s annoyance. Are you afraid she’ll reject you, or is it that you’re afraid she’ll think you’re rejecting her and you’ll lose the first real friend you’ve had in a thousand years?

Everything was too … muddled for Luna to answer. Twilight was precious to her, that was much was painfully apparent, but as a lover? Luna admired the body of a fit, active Mare as much as any Pony, but sexually? The thought of entwining with another Mare didn’t...okay, last night was a fluke, right?

But the feel of Twilight’s soft belly under Luna’s own, and the lingering dampness in the sheets they had made with sweat and other … things haunted Luna.

It wasn’t like Luna had been a virgin. She had lain with Stallions, as was the right of a Noble in that distant time before the coming of the Nightmare Spirit, and the allure of an Alicorn, one of two mythical beings who had saved Equestria from the maniacal whims of Discord, had drawn many poets, courtiers and knights to her side.

But it had been the Princess they wanted under them, begging for more and subservient to their needs, their bodies, not Luna, an equal in their lives and their beds.

It had been the nature of that era, after all, but still Luna felt she had been conditioned to believe that there could be no love in sex.

Yet with Twilight under her, smiling in her sleep, Luna felt a warmth that was more than just physical. She didn’t like Mares like that, she was sure of it, but Twilight was her friend, perhaps her best friend, in this strange world Luna had returned to, where the Mares outnumbered the Stallions ten to one, and all the social customs and quirks she knew had long since been thrown away.

I can’t lose her. Luna thought as she felt Twilight start to stir in her embrace. I can’t lose Twilight. She’s my best friend, the only one I can trust completely, the only one who sees me as Luna, not royalty, or a monster or a silly little sister. Whatever she decides, I will abide, so long as she does not send me away from her side.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It felt … weird to take a bath in the river, especially so late in the day, but then, a lot of things felt weird right now.

Sore too, but Twilight was trying to not focus on that right now.

Everything was still awkward between herself and Luna, adorable, but awkward. Neither of them quite knew how to talk to the other without tripping over their own words, and getting untangled from the sheets with their horns all but useless after two hours of sparking each oth …

Twilight took a deep breath, closed her eyes and dived into the deeper part of the river, focusing on the coldness of the water and pointedly ignoring the hot, itchy craving under her tail.

Upon surfacing, Twilight looked around and waved a hoof towards Luna, back at the camp, who was in the process of airing out the tent, the bedding already soaking in a make-shift washing tub.

Not. Thinking. About. That. Twilight firmly told her subconscious, remembering Luna’s panicked reaction when she’d found the blood on the bedding, grabbing Twilight and asking where she had been hurt.

Awkwardly explaining to Luna that Twilight was, or rather had indeed been a virgin had been one of the hardest things the newest Alicorn had ever done, if only for the crippling embarrassment she felt admitting to it.

Watching all the blood drain out of Luna’s face as the Lunar Princess realised she’d deflowered her friend in a night of animalistic passion had torn Twilight between giving Luna a hug so she’d stop looking so stricken, or falling over laughing at the faces and noises Luna had made after that little bombshell had been dropped.

And the tent reeked of sex. Literally, as soon as the two Ponies had gotten outside and taken a breath, the heady scent became painfully obvious. They’d soaked the each other, which was bad enough, but somehow every inch of bedding had soaked in the smell, and even with it being aired out, the tent still held more than a trace odour of last night’s … incident.

If Celestia’s mysterious ally turned up right now, Luna and Twilight would be busted.

The one thing Twilight had to be grateful for was that the Sparking had helped recharge their internal reservoirs of magic faster than they would have normally.

While neither Luna nor Twilight could boast being up to even ten percent of their normal magical potential just yet, the Sparking had granted them more than enough magic that they could risk a portion of it shaping a nearby chunk of masonry from the castle into a deep ‘bowl’ and setting a magical fire under it. This allowed the Princesses to create a source of hot water to soak the blankets in, along with a bar of soap that had been shredded to pieces to allow it to be turned into a makeshift washing powder.

But I wish Luna had let me help. I know she feels bad about … hurting me during the Sympathy, but it’s not right that she does all the work! Twilight fumed as she watched Luna use her magic to enchant a large, smooth stick to agitate the sudsy water and hopefully dislodge the musky scent that had soaked into the blankets.

“Lunaaaa! I’ll take care of that, you come wash off!” Twilight shouted, paddling to the shore, her wings extended as she revelled in the feeling of the cold water pushing through her feathers, leaving them cold and tingling.

“Very well.” Luna replied, trying to sound calm, but Twilight could hear the hitch in her voice as Twilight came out of the water, her mane wet and clinging to her body, her wings extended fully so that the feathers could dry evenly.

Twilight found herself blushing furiously as Luna’s eyes trailed over her body, her wings twitched inwards towards her body in a sudden surge of shyness, which seemed to snap Luna out of her trance, making the elder Alicorn shake her head, mumble an apology and walk stiff-legged past Twilight.

As Luna moved past her, Twilight found her nose full of the heady scent of the sweetly earthy-scented musk that clung to Luna, and until recently, herself as well.

And now Twilight found herself the one unable to stop staring as the elder Alicorn walked into the river, her tail spreading out into the water like a pool of liquid night sky, her wings dipping down into the river to splash her back with the cold water.

Her heart began to thunder in her chest, and all Twilight could hear was the roar of her own pulse in her ears as Luna began washing herself, her coat becoming soaked with water, her mane plastering itself to her neck and body, and Twilight remember the ecstasy she had felt as that luminous, prehensile mane and tail had wrapped around her and held her tightly against Luna’s body …

“Uhm … Luna?” Twilight asked, blushing furiously as she felt her partially extended wings straightening and lifting on their own. “Did you need help with … with washing your back?”

There’s a moment of silence, a pregnant pause, before Luna turns around, blushing bright red under her dark coat, and nodded once, quickly, even as her wings start to twitch and extend into a similar pose.

Nervous but filled with a guilty eagerness, Twilight stepped back into the water, leaving the camp unattended as she walked up to Luna and began to hesitantly, awkwardly, put into practice all the things the books she kept locked in the sealed section of the library had taught her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Ah should have asked you in the beginning, Miss Fluttershy.” Big Mac rumbled as the last of the debris left behind by the Timber Wolves was moved by her swarm of animal-friends, ranging from rabbits, squirrels, finches and the odd raccoon to a bear three times the size of a Pony.

“Oh … no … I was just … happy to …” Fluttershy mumbled, and Big Mac resisted the urge to sigh. He wasn’t sure if Fluttershy was being, well, Fluttershy, or if she was still intimidated by him.

He hadn’t meant to come on so strong the first time they’d met, but she was just so … so … perfect. Soft, quiet yet willing to stand up for those without voices of their own.

Of course, that drunken moment behind the stables had ended poorly for both of them, especially when Fluttershy had accidentally kneed him in the crotch as they clumsily embraced behind the family shed. He’d been horrified, thinking that maybe he’d been too drunk to notice that Fluttershy might have been trying to fight him off, Fluttershy had been mortified at hurting him and hidden away in her cottage for over a week before he’d managed to get a hoof in the door and offer his apology to her, only for Fluttershy to apologise to him for ruining the mood.

But he’d stressed that he didn’t care about her accidental bucking of the Apple Family jewels. Big Mac had hoped Fluttershy had understood, but the days of her not speaking to him had turned to weeks, and then when she did speak to him, it seemed like she could barely stand to be in the same room as him before finding some excuse to leave, and he’d begun to lose hope that the soft, butter-coloured Mare would ever come into his life again.

With Applejack being such a hard-ass, and Granny Smith being, well, such a hard-ass, and even little Apple Bloom always getting into trouble, and most of the Mares in Ponyville either treating him like a muscle-bound oaf or some sort of trophy to win, another notch to add to their belts, a Mare like Fluttershy who was so shy and reserved, yet still possessing a strong sense of right and wrong …

Well, Big Mac has realised long ago that the term he was looking for was ‘carrying a torch’ for Fluttershy, but he was an Apple stallion, and his family prided themselves on being good, honest country folk, and that meant being a gentlecolt to the Mares … even if his Pa hadn’t been one, his Grandpa had managed to hang on long enough to teach Big Macintosh how to be one.

“No, really, you’ve saved me. I need to get these supplies to Twili….aaaaah, I mean Zecora …” Big Mac began, stumbling verbally as he tried to recover from his mistake.

Not that that saying he was going over to Zecora’s was any better. Zecora and he had an … understanding after a bout with Poison Joke had left them in a compromising situation, and considering that Carrot Top, sour-tempered nag of a Mare that she was, had caught them and told half the town about it when Big Mac had refused to let her in on the ‘fun’. Big Mac didn’t want Fluttershy to think he was sneaking off to the Zebra for some afternoon delight, for fear that she might become angry or think less of him.

It always worried him that Zecora and Fluttershy got along so well, and thought of what they might talk about in regards to him when they were alone together always made the big farm-Pony break into a nervous sweat.

“Oh, it’s alright, Big Mac. Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash all convinced Spike to tell them that Twilight and Princess Luna are in the Everfree Forest.” Fluttershy mumbled at his side, and amazingly enough, reached out to touch him with a wing when Big Mac put a hoof to his face and groaned. “I’m sure the Princess won’t mind…”

“Well … we’ll just have to let her Highness know fast then.” Big Mac groaned, then went still as he realised that Fluttershy had touched him. “Ah … I guess you’d know … uhm … Miss Fluttershy, if your animals friends don’t need you … would you … like to … come with me? To see Twilight, I mean!”

Oh, brilliant, ah just invited Fluttershy into the dang Everfree Forest, full of Manticors an’ Dragons an’ Timber Wolves an’ …

“Yes, I’d love to come … if that’s okay? If you don’t mind?” Fluttershy squeaked … but her pinions didn’t leave Big Mac’s shoulder.

“I’d be delighted to have you along, Miss Fluttershy.” Big Mac replied, feeling a mite proud that his voice didn’t also squeak. This is your chance, Mac, don’t let it slip through your hooves! “Why don’t you just hop up onto the wagon, where it’s safe?”

“Oh, uhm, I’d rather stay next to you … if that’s okay?”

……

“That’ll be juuust fine, Miss Fluttershy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was the simple things in life, Luna thought to herself as she lay on her back on the soft grass that lined the river-bank. The simple things in life that were best.

Twilight had been an awkward lover, hesitant at first, and then perhaps a bit too eager after Luna started to urge her onwards, but she had proved to the Lunar Princess that what she’d read in her precious books could indeed translate very well into the real world. A couple of times, in fact.

Their lovemaking had been shy, clumsy and awkward, punctuated by laughter and giggling apologies, yet by far one of the sweetest moments of Luna’s long life.

Just enjoying the warm sunshine as their fur dried, with Twilight cuddled up against Luna’s side and enjoying each other’s company, holding hooves silently …

“That was …” Twilight murmured softly, giving Luna’s hoof a squeeze with her own. “I just … wow, you know, books really don’t prepare you for the real thing.”

“And last night? That wasn’t ‘real’ to you?” Luna replied, lifting her head as much as she can to look at Twilight’s face, feeling a little confused about what Twilight had just said. “I hadn’t realised I had been your first, else I would have tried harder to fight the Sympathy.”

“Well, it was ‘real’, but I … I wasn’t myself, if that makes sense? I think what just happened was more ‘real’ than last night. It wasn’t us being moved by the Sympathy, or our magic, it was just us …” Blushing, Twilight tried to explain herself, stammering adorably before Luna brought her head down and silenced Twilight with a soft kiss on the lips.

She is just too cute. Luna thought to herself as she drew Twilight to her, the younger, inexperienced Mare embracing Luna clumsily yet eagerly on the cool grass ...

“Princess Luna? Miss Twilight? You here?” A Stallion’s voice boomed in the air, shocking both Alicorns and making them jump apart, giving each other wild-eyed looks of shock.

“Wha-what? Isn’t it supposed to be a secret we’re out here?” Twilight stammered, blushing from her face all the way down to the base of her neck.

“It … it could be this ‘Bag Marking’ that my sister mentioned …” Luna replied, also blushing.

“Bag Marki … wait, Celestia knows … Big Macintosh?” Gaping, the purple Alicorn turned her head to the direction the voice had come from, and sure enough a familiar red head appeared, with his trademark heavy wooden harness, then the rest of his robust body, towing the Apple Family’s cart behind him.

And then Fluttershy poked her head out from behind Big Mac’s body, giving a nervous smile and a wave with one of her wings.

And the two were smack dab between Luna, Twilight and the airing tent …

It was going to be one of those days, it seemed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well gosh-darn-it, did’ja see where your brother got to?” Applejack asked, more than a touch angry at being so easily avoided by her lunk of a brother.

“No, but he did ask us to go ask Fluttershy to help him move the branches, then Fluttershy asked us to look after Angel, and then we thought “Cutie Mark Crusader Rabbit Sitters” … and then we kind of had to chase the dang rabbit through Ponyville …”

“Applebloom … a ‘no’ would have done jus’ fine.” The farm-mare sighed, pulling her hat down over her face and counting to ten silently before speaking again. “Jus’ … go find Angel, without setting fire to anything this time, an’ wait at Fluttershy’s house till she gets back. Me an’ the girls will try to find your idjit brother.”

Behind Applejack, Rarity fumed that the perpetual wall-flower had stolen a march on them all, while Rainbow Dash kept on muttering about having to wait for ‘Ground Ponies’, her wings twitching with the need to get into the air and chase after Fluttershy.

Once the Cutie Mark Crusaders were finally out of earshot, Rainbow Dash let rip.

“OF ALL THE STUPID THINGS! FLUTTERSHY GOES ON AHEAD WITHOUT US? WHAT WAS SHE THINKING?” The cyan Mare yelled, stamping the ground with a hoof for emphasis. “There’s Manticores and Timber Wolves and Serpents and Cockatrices and Cragadiles and …. Aaaaaaaaagh!”

“Well, to be fair sugar, it is Fluttershy. She’ll likely have made friends with most of the beasties in the Everfree Forest an’ be fine.” Applejack pointed out, then turned an eye to the pile of Timberwolf ‘debris’ next to the track that led into the Everfree Forest. “ ‘Course, Fluttershy’s ‘Stare’ don’t work none on the Timber Wolves … maybe we should get a move on an’ see if she an’ my idjit big brother are doin’ alright.”

“Indeed. And when we find Fluttershy and Big Macintosh, I suspect we will also find Twilight and Princess Luna. Big Macintosh seems to be the only Pony in Ponyville who knows exactly where they are.” From the back, the pristinely groomed Rarity pointed out, looking at the deep wagon-ruts left in the wet, muddy road with some trepidation. “The things we do for our friends …”

“Errr, speakin’ of friends, where the heck is Pinkie Pie?” Applejack asked, looking around for the perennially random pony to show up.

“Pinkie said the Cakes needed her after the Pinkie Alert yesterday scared most of their customers away and left them behind in their baking.” Waving her white horn back to Ponyville, Rarity’s face broke into a brief, honest smile. “I haven’t seen Pinkie this enthusiastic about baking in ages. It seems she’s been wanting to push herself for some time.”

“Yeah yeah, wahoo, can we go already! I’m not that keen on leaving Twilight with Moon-butt out in the middle of the most dangerous forest in Equestria!” Trotting ahead, Rainbow Dash snapped over her shoulder to the two other Mares.

Applejack and Rarity shared a confused look before chasing after their surly friend, each wondering exactly what could have irritated the Pegasus so much.

For Rainbow’s part, the thought of Twilight laughing and chatting about egg-head things with that gloomy Princess of the Night irritated her on several levels. Bad enough that she barely got enough time to spend with Twilight before the purple Unicorn had been turned into a glowing magical star-thingy, and then an Alicorn of all things, but then almost every attempt to teach Twilight how to fly had been thwarted by Princess Celestia and her lessons on high society and snooty ponies, and now Twilight was being hoarded again, this time by Princess Luna.

And the letter to Big Mac had mentioned ‘magical entanglements’, ‘absolute discretion’ and ‘political consequences’. Most of it had gone right over Rainbow’s head, but some parts had made all too much sense for the Pegasus to feel comfortable about.

What it really meant, at least to Rainbow’s understanding, was that something had happened to her friend and Luna that meant they were now inseparable, and the very thought chilled Rainbow to the core even as it filled her with irritation and a surge of jealousy towards the Princess of the Night.

Despite being an egg-head and a nerd, Twilight had been there for Rainbow, even when Rainbow and Applejack had been feuding, even when Rainbow had made huge mistakes and could have been in a great deal of trouble, Twilight had been ready to put herself on the line to help out. Twilight didn’t hang around with Rainbow because of the cyan Mare’s local popularity like some of the other Ponies in town did. She was a true friend, and the thought that they might drift apart tore at Rainbow like gryphon’s claws.

Rainbow was the Element of Loyalty, and thus she was devoutly loyal to her friends. And if a friend needed Rainbow Dash to go push some Princess’s muzzle in to save them from this ‘Sympathy’ thingy, then that’s what Rainbow would do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mid-day, Day 2, Everfree Forest

“Soooo … You’re Celestia’s contact in Ponyville? I never realised you also knew the Princess!” Twilight asked as she helped Big Mac unload the wagon, while Luna tried desperately to get Fluttershy away from the tent, while the pale yellow Pegasus remained blissfully ignorant of the reasons why and kept on trying to help ‘tidy up’.

“Errr, nnnope. She jus’ pays me to keep aside the best of my family’s black-label apple-cider for her.” Big Mac replied bashfully, rubbing at the back of his head with a hoof. “An’ she knows no Apple worthy of the name’ll rat on her. Uhm … yer highness … ah should really be unloading these. You’re royalty now …”

“Oh no you don’t!” The purple Alicorn snorted angrily, giving Big Mac a glare that made him flinch in surprise. “I’m still me, Big Macintosh, and don’t you forget it. I will never let my title stop me from being able to help out my friends, and that includes you, buster!”

Big Mac blinked at her for a few moments before giving a short laugh and shook his head.

“Ah, yer right. Sorry ‘bout that, miss Twilight, been a heck of a day thus far, had to clear a heap of Timber Wolf pieces off the road, funny lights comin’ from the Everfree Forest last night too, an’ it’s left me all twitchy.” The massive red farm-pony chuckled nervously, his eyes trailing to where Luna and Fluttershy were engaged in a vigorous war of apologies. “ah’ve never heard of Timber Wolves bein’ so close to the farm except durin’ the Zap-Apple harvest, let alone leavin’ their bits an’ pieces lyin’ around like that.”

“O-oooh.” Twilight mumbled, holding a hoof to her mouth. Last night she and Luna had been sparking each other, caught in a feedback-loop created by their Sympathy to each other’s magic and the power of the Empathy’s Core. She hadn’t realised they’d created visible flashes of light that could been seen from town! Or that they had been sending pulses of wild magic all throughout the Everfree Forest, causing all kinds of … wait, maybe this could be used to get Big Mac and Fluttershy away from the tent! “OH! Oh no! Has anyone thought to check on Zecora?”

Big Mac blinked at Twilight again, obviously lost at this leap in the conversation.

“What if … uh … whatever spooked the Timber Wolves also went to her house?” Twilight stammered, hoping the explanation would be enough to get Big Mac concerned, and also to drag him and Fluttershy away from the tent.

Big Mac’s expression went from one of puzzlement to alarm, as he quickly deposited the crate he had been holding onto the ground and rushed over to Fluttershy and Luna. Twilight knew that the sturdy Farm Pony was stoic and loyal to those who proved to be friends to the Apple family, but she hadn’t realised he had considered Zecora to be a part of that circle.

Or maybe he’s just that kind of Stallion. Somebody’s in trouble, so he’s got to help them. The youngest ‘Princess’ thought to herself, feeling more than a touch guilty for how easily she’d turned Big Mac’s attention to a situation that might not even have happened.

In the scant few moments it took Twilight to gather her thoughts and join the other Ponies, Big Mac had gotten Fluttershy all riled up over Zecora possibly being in danger, and the two were discussing how to get to the Zebra’s house.

“Twilight, what did you do? Your friends are panicking!” Luna hissed as the two Alicorns stood together, watching the other Ponies nervously.

“I may have shifted their focus off of us, but I think we’re about to go on a trip to the deepest part of the Everfree Forest.” Twilight whispered back, giving Luna an apologetic look. “Big Mac mentioned that he found some Timber Wolf debris near his farm after our … experiment last night got out of control, and I said …”

Twilight found herself cut off as Luna’s hoof clapped onto her shoulder and shook her roughly.

“Twilight! You didn’t tell him about …” Now Luna looked more mortified than angry, and Twilight shook her head franticly, wincing as the movement made her head swim with vertigo even more.

“No no! I just said that Zecora might be in trouble, that’s all! It is a possibility, after all … that much wild magic running amok could do anything!” The younger Alicorn stammered, woozily leaning onto Luna as her vision spun.

“Princess Luna, Twilight, we need to go check on Zecora. Will you be alright unloading on your own?” Fluttershy called out, the Pegasus and the Farm Pony already moving towards the darkest part of the Everfree Forest.

“We will assist you!” Luna shouted back, more than a touch of her ‘Canterlot Voice’ coming out. “I cannot in good conscience let a friend of Twilight’s remain in danger!”

Oh buck. Twilight groaned mentally as she and Luna trotted to catch up with Big Mac and Fluttershy. What if Zecora really isn’t in trouble? And what happens if Zecora knows where the Wild Magic came from?

Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

Canterlot, same time …

Excusing herself from the Day Court had been hard enough, Celestia felt, especially given how clingy certain factions of the Nobility had become and the current backlog of duties left by the past few weeks shenanigans, but facing what awaited her in the bedroom had become increasingly harder.

I’ve made a terrible mistake.

No sooner had she gotten into her private quarters and shut the door than Discord had started up some sort of rebellion against her involving afros, bell-bottom pants of an eye-searingly purple shade and disco-balls.

Apparently being confined to her bedroom had driven Discord mad … or rather mad-er, and now she was winding down from some sort of fast-forward dancing marathon from the 60’s to the modern era, and while she felt very, very silly and utterly exhausted, Celestia did have to admit that laughing with Discord as they sat together on her bed had felt very, very good.

After a very heart-felt apology from Celestia for imprisoning Discord, and then another apology where Celestia couldn’t stop spluttering or blushing as she apologised for having her way with him. Celestia had banished the anti-magic spell from her private room …

And Discord had snapped his fingers, repaired all the furniture in the room to pristine condition … and then promptly vanished, taking with him the warmth out of Celestia’s chest.

Celestia sat on the bed, the disco-ball still turning and twinkling overhead, silent and stone-faced, feeling so very cold and empty inside as her eyes remained locked on the place where Discord had been just moments ago.

She had expected a prank, or riddle, Tartarus, even a fart-joke in revenge for taking advantage of him. But Discord hadn’t smirked or laughed or even made a corny threat, he’d just snapped his fingers and disappeared like it was all nothing.

Silently, Celestia got up off the bed, closed the doors to her balcony and drawn the blinds down, removed the clothes Discord had conjured onto her, put her royal crown and adornments on the newly-repaired bedside stand and slipped under covers, promising herself she would not cry over Discord of all creatures being insensitive.

Except when her wings reached out to gather more of the enchanted cloud-bedding to her, her feathers felt the warmth that Discord and she had left behind while seated on the covers, and a muted sob shook the Princess as she gathered it to her chest and folded her wings around it, crying as she cradled that warmth against her body.

She was, again, alone in a kingdom that worshipped the mask she wore for them, and were ignorant of the Pony underneath.

No Twilight to call into her room for a ‘study session’, where that innocent little filly would lean against Celestia all through the lesson, and the Solar Princess could pretend Twilight was the daughter she never had, and never could have, if the descendants of her other children had proven anything.

No Luna to help Celestia while away the lonely nights with catch-up sessions on Equestrian history and social customs and boisterous gaming matches that helped heal the wounds of doubt, regret and self-blame that still lingered between them.

And now Discord had delivered an emotional gut-punch by fleeing the moment she let her guard down, right when she had bared her soul to him, right when the two Ponies that Celestia felt closest too, the two Ponies Celestia knew would never abandon her were now beyond her reach, by her own actions.

It just wasn’t fair.

She wasn’t sure how long she lay there, hugging the cloud-blankets and trying to not cry, when something tugged gently at the covers.

As Celestia peeked over the covers, she saw Discord, bearing a small potted plant, and an oddly serious expression.

“Wha …” Celestia mumbled, as the covers were lifted off of her body and the balcony doors snapped open, courtesy of another finger-snap from Discord, flooding the room with the light of her sun and the cool spring air.

“Cellie, my dear, dear friend … here.” Discord said solemnly, holding forth the potted plant as if it were the Elements of Harmony themselves, and Celestia looked at him, the potted plant, then back to the Chaos Aspect before gingerly taking the ‘gift’ in her own hooves.

When it didn’t explode, or turn into a Triffid, after the count of five, Celestia leaned forwards, not caring that Discord could see how red her eyes probably were from crying or how her makeup had run, and stared hard at the bush.

It was a strange, primitive plant, with woody branches and small, round leaves with a dark, oily-green colouration, and tiny clumps of purple berries … indeed, it was a plant that hadn’t been seen in Equestria for almost four thousand years … and one that Celestia could never forget.

“Discord … where did you get this?” Celestia asked softly as she turned the pot around and around, looking for something, anything, that this was just a coincidence, a prank that had had an unexpected twist to it.

“In a place with no name, Cellie, on the other side of the Badlands.” The Aspect of Chaos replied in that same eerily serious voice, and as she looked up at Discord, Celestia was struck by how … sad he looked. “One of the things your dear Ponies have taught me is that friends shouldn’t lie to each other. And I am afraid that I saw your journal.”

For a few moments, Celestia wondered which journal Discord meant, for she had hundreds of them, political journals, journals on her spells and experiments, personal journals, but the plant in her hooves quickly narrowed it down.

Discord knew.

No wonder he had been so cold to her. How could anyone love her when they … what was he doing?

Celestia had a moment of hoof-flailing panic as she felt Discord’s serpentine body extended like a hose coming off the reel to wrap around her own, trapping her in a tight embrace as the Aspect’s lion paw and eagle claw grabbed her fore-hooves tightly, holding them firmly to the pot.

“Di-Discord, what are you doing?” Celestia asked in a soft voice as she felt herself trapped within Discord’s coils. It was a bizarre sight, to see Discord’s upper torso just hanging there in mid-air while the rest of his lower torso and body just kept on wrapping around her.

“I believe it is called a ‘hug’, my dear.” Discord replied, smiling wanly. “It’s what friends do when they’ve upset and hurt each other, or so I’m told.”

“No, no I mean why have you come back … you know what happened. You know it all. How can you stand to be here, in the same room as me?” The Solar Princess clarified, desperate to know the answer even as she dreaded the confirmation she felt she knew was coming.

“Oh Cellie, no wonder you try so hard to protect your precious little ponies.” Discord said softly as his upper body stopped it’s bizarre levitation and wrapped around her like his lower body had, his magic floating them both back into the bed. “All that loneliness, all the guilt over what you felt you had to do. And you think you are the sole survivor …”

For a few seconds, Celesita lay stiff in the Aspect’s embrace, waiting for the inevitable prank, or the cold rebuttal, but when she realised that Discord was sympathizing with her, not blaming her, the Solar Princess felt all the tension fall out of her body and let herself cry, even as the mask of the Princess screamed at her to show any more weakness to Discord, to not let her guard down.

It took several minutes for Celestia to finally regain enough control to stop crying, during which Discord had showed considerable restraint, simply holding her and stroking her mane as the tears came, until Celestia found herself able to ask that all important question.

“Why?” She whispered, savouring the feel of a warm body against her own in a bed that had been cold and empty for far, far too long. “Why can you forgive me, Discord? Most others would have called me a monster for what I did.”

“Celestia, I have been alone since this reality cleaved from its parent shortly after the birth of Creation itself. I am older than this sphere itself, older than the sun you raise and lower every day.” Discord replied softly, running an eagle-talon through Celestia’s mane, and she shivered as she digested that little bit of information. “I have seen civilisations rise and fall, seen the best and worst of each one fade into nothingness and abandoned myself to the safety of madness in the silence of entire worlds of life snuffed out by nuclear winters and mass-extinction events, letting myself dissolve into the ether and reform tens of thousands of years later as a new entity more times than your mane and tail have hairs. Allow me to say that, with all certainty, if you had not broken the reign of the Herd-Masters before the Pegasi, Unicorns and Earth Ponies had crossed into ancient Equestria, you would be the ruler of a continent-spanning charnel-house.”

His lion’s paw patted her shoulder as his coils shifted against her, wrapping her tightly as Discord’s head came to rest on her neck, a gesture that felt oddly comforting to Celestia, whom was viewed as inviolate, untouchable even by her Ponies, whom had such contact rarely, if at all.

“I cannot say whether what you did was right or wrong. I will not say if you were justified or not in turning on your own people to save Equestria. But I can say, Celestia, that I understand why you did it.”

For precious moments there was silence as Discord waited for her to respond, and Celestia scrabbled for space to think. Discord, of all creatures, was sympathizing with her for what she had done so many thousands of years ago.

And then she hit on something he had said.

“Wait … Discord, what did you say about being the sole survivor?” Celestia asked, turning as much as she could in his coils to look Discord in the face. “They are all dead. I saw the ruins. I buried the bodies. That Tribe is lost for all time, the Dragons left no survivors. Only the Flutterponies and the Sea-Ponies survived.”

“Not true, Celestia. You found their descendants just over two thousand years ago, although they had much changed since you last saw them.” Discord whispered back, smiling softly. “You even broke through the cold heart of their Princess, Imago, and called her your friend, back before I decided to meddle in your life. It was why I wondered why you called Luna your sister, when a true blood relative was so close by.”

Celestia felt the metaphorical ground shift under her hooves even as her eyes were drawn back to the woody, primitive shrub. The proud, hearty Gypsies of the Endless Plains had been the descendants of her Tribe? Those Ponies who sang endlessly and called the shy Flutterponies their friends as they pulled their wagons endlessly over the rich grazing of the Endless Plains had descended from the superstitious, cruel Ponies who had called her monster, who had delivered such unspeakable cruelties to everything that was different, everything that did not fit the narrow, viciously self-centered decrees of the Herd Masters?

But the Gypsies were long dead, victims of Imago’s greed for eternal life and beauty and her jealousy of Celestia and Luna’s immortal natures, her pride and ego leading her to use a forbidden ritual involving blood magic and the powers of Tartarus that had stripped the life and vitality out of the Gypsies, reduced the Flutterponies to a handful of magically crippled refugees now known as Breezies who were too fragile to survive in Equestria, erased the Gypsie Queen from existence and the blasted the land itself with the backwash of her foul ritual, turning the endless sea of green grass and wild oats into the hostile and lifeless Badlands.

Her mind whirled with confusion even as her body lay limp in Discord’s coils.

Discord had told her that the Gypsies still lived. Her people were still alive, somewhere on the other side of the Badlands.

Did she dare hope that maybe, somehow, she could make good on her actions from so long ago and take them into Equestria, and away from their brutal past?

Celestia, feeling safe and warm in the grip of Discord’s coils, felt the first stirrings of hope, not for her nation, not for her people, but for herself, as the Sun overhead grew brighter and shed its light vibrantly all over Equestria.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the same time, just outside of Equestria’s borders

“Majesty.” The Drone murmured, dropping a small, squishy sphere onto the pillow in front of her, the orb’s translucent shell barely containing the swirling pink substance, the black-shelled Drone bowing low, wobbling slightly with the interior of the covered wagon rocked as one of the wheels hit a rock. “Your meal.”

“Thank you. Has the rest of the Hive been fed as well?” Chrysalis murmured, extending a hoof to drag the sphere to her, fighting to control the shaking that plagued her so often these days, to maintain at least the illusion of the regal grace she had once possessed.

“…Yes.” The Drone replied with a barely noticeable pause.

Liar, his pheromones cried out.

In the Hive-Mind, she could taste his despair, his sorrow, directed towards her as much as the Drones outside who would go without for another week, just to keep her fed. To keep the lich-pin of the Hive alive just another day.

“I see …” Chrysalis murmured, rolling the sphere back and forth under her hoof, biting her lower lip in frustration.

First the Canterlot invasion had failed, all due to Twilight Sparkle’s interference. Six months of planning, plotting and spying to get Cadence’s mannerisms down pat, and then bang, in two days the little Unicorn had blown the plan to Tartarus and back.

Then her attempt to force Twilight to join her side, to groom her to become the new Queen, or rather Queen-Substitute, for Chrysalis’s hive had failed, miserably at that, and the Hive had taken several weeks to dig everyone out, at which point everyone could barely stand, so malnourished and desperate for a whiff of Love to fill the aching hunger that gripped them all.

Thankfully the Kattians, the strange, cat-like creatures that had taken in her Hive after the disaster of the Canterlot Invasion, had remained near the ruins of her castle, and were quick to offer their boundless love once more to their ‘friends’, the Changelings.

But it was too late for Chrysalis. Too late for them all, really. The damage done when the castle had fallen on-top of her, and then the long weeks of starvation, had merely sped up the process. Being bloated on Shining Armor’s love, then receiving that energy again, this time as a massive shield that rejected her very presence, had done damage to something inside Chrysalis, some organ that harvested the love-residue her kind fed on to sustain themselves had gone inert, or died.

Even now, just thinking about how Shining Armor had once adored her, and then thrown his all into rejecting her very existence, caused Chrysalis as much physical pain as emotional. She’d fed too deep, too much, and established a rapport with her ‘host’, and the rejection, both physical and emotional, had done her a great deal of harm.

Once, the sphere she had been given could have sustained her for a month. Now, she’d be lucky if it lasted her a day. Days of harvesting, curing and fermenting, and all done on the march too, and she would be lucky if her body was able to absorb enough to keep her alive till tomorrow.

And yet, if she did not feed, she would likely die sometime in the night as her body ran out of precious Love-Energy to sustain it, and then the Hive would be doomed to a slow, withering death akin to what the Ponies would call ‘dementia’ without a Queen to be the center of their Hive-Mind.

The Hive was aware, of course, through the mental link of the Hive-Mind that Chrysalis was damaged, possibly beyond repair, but she needed to remain alive long enough for one of her latest brood to mature to the stage where she could feed it her precious royal jelly, at the onset of puberty, and turn what would ordinarily be just another Drone into a new Proto-Queen.

And then, Chrysalis knew, when the Proto-Queen became strong enough to be the hub of the Hive-Mind, then the Hive would let her die.

Some would do feel regret when the time came, while most lacked the individuality to even process such emotions, and a rare few would take a sort of pleasure at seeing their ‘failure’ of a Queen fade away, but she knew that her time was dwindling faster than the sand in a Pony’s hourglass.

It wasn’t out of spite, or tradition, but simple practicality that the Hive would let her starve to death once her duty was done. The lessons they had learned in the Badlands was that mercy would breed weakness, and weakness brought suffering and death to the Hives.

She was literally a drain on their supply of love, bountiful though the Kattians were, and the rules that had kept the Hive alive demanded that any that threatened the safety of the Hive be stopped by any means necessary. And once the tiny bodies that clung to her underside, sleeping and blissfully unaware of their mother’s fate, were old enough to accept the mantle, Chrysalis knew the Drones would come and take her away to die alone, ousting her from the Hive-Mind so that her death-rattle would not disturb the younger, fragile mind of the new Queen.

The Badlands had taught Chrysalis’s Hive many harsh lessons about the folly of mercy, the foolishness of compassion. Dragons, Chimeras and other monsters that lived in those blasted lands, preying upon anything and everything weaker than themselves, and then, more frightening than all the other threats, were the Hives of the older generations of the Empress’s brood, creatures who were less Pony and more … Other.

Accursed Ponies! All I needed was Canterlot! A single month of harvesting the Love from all those Ponies would have fed the Hive for a year. A season’s worth of harvesting would have allowed me to breed enough Drones to make even the First Generation Queens think twice about attacking! Chrysalis raged in her mind, shooting an apologetic glance to the loyal Drone as it winced at the taste of her anger brushing against the Hive-Mind, and then soothing it, and hopefully the rest of the Hive-Mind, with memories of her tending their eggs so long ago, and then imposing a figure, like hers in shape but subtly different in posture and features, over her own image.

It had taken weeks to find a wagon this far from Pony lands, repair it and then manage to get the Kattians on the move, and to get them to stay with the convoy was nothing short of nightmarish. And yet, in her weakened condition, if she attempted the journey on foot, Chrysalis knew she would be dead by now …

It galled Chrysalis to no end to go this far, to ask for mercy , to be so wretchedly weak and helpless, but she could feel the others coming, dark, sharp, angular Mind-Glows that clawed at the borders of her Hive-Mind, demanding to be let in, those minds that were like but not-like her own Mind-Glow was the only way she could describe them.

Her elder sisters. The previous generations spawned by the Empress. Now that Chrysalis and her Brood-Sisters had failed, the Elder Queens were moving to wipe out her generation, devour her Drones and wait for the Empress to bear a new Generation of Queens.

How many of us are there left? Five? Three? Out of the hundred clawed their way out of the Spawning Pits and over the bodies of our sisters who had been birthed weak and malformed? Pupae took her Drones and hid amongst the Gryphons, but they have precious little love to spare and the Gryphon Tribes can barely tolerate each other’s presence, let alone outsiders. Cocoon went to Prance, but I heard the death-rattles of her Drones in the Hive-Mind, and her life-glow faded months ago. The Changeling Queen sighed, picking up the sphere of Love-Brew between her hooves and making only the slightest of holes with her fangs, taking only a few drops at a time, in the hopes that a longer, slower digestion would help her failing body absorb more of the precious Love. Larvae only ever had a score of Drones, and tried to live like the Ponies, pretending to be a family of drifters, but she stayed in that ‘Apple-loosa’ place. Far too close to the Badlands. Far too close to home. Our Elder Sisters will hunt down her life-glow and tear her and that town apart …

“Majesty, we are, at best guess, a week’s travel the border of Equestria. Are you … are you certain?” The Drone whispered as the wagon’s interior bumped along the dirt road, pulled by a dozen Changelings, with dozens more flying escort all around it. “We could take the Kattians, go hide in some remote valley, put ourselves into hibernation and wait out the purge.”

“You know that will not work. The Elder Queen’s meekest Drones would sniff us out by our pheromones alone.” Chrysalis pointed out, offering the Drone a mouthful of her meal, which he blinked at, then took a quick sip, the dullness of his life-glow brightening noticeably. “Alone, with myself in this condition and my heirs barely able to stand, we will die. Even if all my Brood-Sisters rejoined us, and we built an army from every Changeling able to stand upright on their own legs, we will die. No, as galling as it is, as disgusting as it is, we must go to Celestia and put ourselves in her hooves.”

“So we are to surrender.” The Drone murmured, his short, beetle-like wings rattling with frustration. It was still difficult for the Hive to disassociate the term ‘surrender’ from ‘death’, but their contact with the Ponies, while combative in nature, had shown that the Ponies would not kill the Changelings if they did indeed surrender.

“Not unconditionally.” Chrysalis reminded him, as one of her heirs murmured and hugged one of her teats in his sleep. “I still possess some cards left to play.”

The ripple that had struck the Hive-Mind last night, still several days from the borders of Equestria, a short-lived but potent wave of magic tasting of Starlight and Camaraderie, Moonbeams and Magic, had been startling to all the Changelings within the Hive, a wave of warmth that was at once both alien and yet hauntingly familiar, but it has also given Chrysalis some ideas beyond her desperate ploy to get her Hive to safety behind the borders of Equestria.

She knew the taste of at least some of that ripple of power, and the very thought of what it meant made Chrysalis smirk as she sank her fangs back into the sphere and took another few drops of life-giving Love-brew. Twilight Sparkle, her nemesis, the Pony she had once thought might be the salvation of her Hive, and might yet still be, had fallen in love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Day 2, Early afternoon, Everfree Forest

“Darlings, I think we’re lost.”

“Dang it, Rainbow, this is all your fault!”

“Well maybe if you guys would keep up …”

“We’re lost because you ran off ahead an’ lost the wagon ruts. It's a pair of straight lines in a dirt road, how could you lose them?”

“Hey, I don’t want to hear that from somebody who went off the road to get her hat back and ended up in quicksand!”

“Rainbow, I must concur with Applejack. You are far too obsessed with speed, and now we’re …”

“OH COME ON! You have to stop every five minutes to brush the leaves out of your hair, it’ll be nightfall before we find Twilight and Moonbutt if you set the pace!”

“Di-did yah jus’ call Princess Luna ‘Moonbutt’?”

“Of all the nerve! I am a lady, Rainbow Dash, and a lady must look her best, regardless of the situation!”

“Oh for buck’s sake, what, do you think Prince Blueblood is going to pop out from behind the bushes and comment on your hair?”

“I THOUGHT WE AGREED NEVER TO MENTION THAT NAME EVER AGAIN?”

“No, seriously, Rainbow, did’ja jus’ called the Princess ‘Moonbutt’? Ah’m thinkin’ that’s pretty darn foolish …”

“Oh, I’m sorry! Perhaps you’re hoping for Tom the Boulder, or maybe that River-Serpent instead?”

“You leave Steven out of this! He’s a wonderful, sensitive soul, and not for the likes of you to comment on!”

“Oh yea … wait? Steven? His name is Steven?”

“Steven Magnet, actually! Honestly, Rainbow, I don’t know just what has crawled up your plot, but you really …”

“CRAWLED UP MY WHAT? Is that really the language a ‘Lady’ would use?”

“Do yah think Luna’ll banish us if she hears Rainbow call her ‘Moonbutt’? Ah know ah’d get pretty steamed if somebody called me ‘Applebutt’, y’know?”

“If I must descend to your level to make you see reason, so be it!”

“Descend to my … oh that is it!”

“Y’all need to … oh! Oh, girls, ah found the tracks again, ah found the tracks!”

“EAT MY HOOF OF JUSTICE, MARSHMALLOW PONY!”

“I don’t need muscles when I can slap you silly with magic, speed-freak!”

“What the heck are y’all … hey! HEY! Mah hat! Right, time fer mah rope-tricks!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight and Luna brought up the rear as Big Mac and Fluttershy charged through the Everfree Forest, Fluttershy leading the way while Big Mac was a half-step behind, carrying a first-aid kit in his mouth.

Twilight, for her part, was looking at the Everfree forest with more than a little bit of guilt. She knew that the Everfree Forest held a great many creatures of powerful and wild magic, and as the foursome of Ponies raced down the half-hidden tracks that riddled the forest, she saw the signs of the Sympathy’s passage.

There was a one of the odd, spherical hives of the Parasprites that lay shattered, the tough, leathery sphere ripped from the branches of the trees above, crushed under its own weight. And few moments later, they came across a Cragadile, flailing impotently from where it had been wedged between two ancient trees, the great reptile’s stony hide dug deep into the wooden flesh of the trees and their sap flowed down over its scales, hardening and trapping the predator even further.

She had not realised that their … experiment could have had such an effect on the forest, let alone that it could have reached so far from their little clearing.

Yet we were only recharged just a little bit … Twilight thought, chewing on her bottom lip in thought as she followed Big Mac and Fluttershy. I know we’re both Alicorns, but isn’t this a bit too much? There must be a trick, something we haven’t discovered or learned about Empathy’s Core, some infusion method that will properly funnel the magic we release into the Core and not let it spill out like this.

“Zecora? Zecora! Are you okay?” Fluttershy, of all Ponies, shouting brought Twilight out of her thoughts, and the sight of Zecora’s tree-house made her blood run cold. All the tikki-masks had been knocked off their perches, there were vines that looked like they’d been ripped off the dead branches of the tree and left hanging, and the windows were all ajar, allowing a faintly glowing yellow mist to escape from the interior of the dead tree-house.

Oh dear sweet Faust, no, please no.

As the four Ponies came clattering in through the open doorway, they found even more destruction strewn across the floor, tiki-masks scattered everywhere, with many of them warped or burnt.

“Zecora! Zecora!” Fluttershy yelled, storming into the house, only for the Zebra in question to come barrelling out of a side room, the two colliding and falling to the ground in a tangle of limbs.

“Miss Zecora, Miss Fluttershy, you both okay?” Big Mac asked after the large farm-Pony had picked his way across the debris and helped the two Mares to their hooves, both of them wobbling from nearly giving each other concussions.

“I shall survive, I still have my hide, although I fear that dear Fluttershy has dented my … pride.” Zecora replied wryly, rubbing at her head and giving Fluttershy a broad grin. “Tell me, my dear friends, what brings you to this path’s end?”

“We … were worried you might have been caught up in a burst of Wild Magic last night. And it looks like we were right.” Twilight explained, levitating a fallen tiki-mask and wincing as half of the mask fell off and clattered to the floor. “Are you okay?”

“My home is ravaged, but that I can mend. But the surge of magic was not wild, but full of lust without end.” The zebra shaman muttered as she ushered the Ponies out of her ruined home. “Out my friends, we must not stay, these fumes will make our wits fly away. My potions all shattered, the contents have mixed, not safe is my home, till the damage can be fixed.”

“Uh, Miss Zecora, pardon me, but what do you mean by ‘lust without end'.” Big Mac asked softly as the Ponies walked to the far side of the clearing where Zecora made her home. “You mean there’s something out here using Love Magic? Like Changelings?”

“I do not know if this was some sort of attack, but Changelings hoard power, not throw it back.” The Shaman offered, before sighing heavily and shooting a sad look at her smoking home. “Fortunate is your arrival, for days it will take, before the potions stop their smoking and this Zebra can catch a break.”

“Oh, oh, Zecora! You can come live with me for a while … if that’s okay?” The silence as everyone pondered that bit of news was broken by Fluttershy of all Ponies, who squealed with uncharacteristic glee, before wilting and hiding under her wings as everyone turned to look at her in amazement.

“Ah … was gonna say you could crash at mah family’s farm … but livin’ with Fluttershy’ll be easier on you.” Big Mac rumbled, although his smile looked a little worried, and Twilight noted his gaze flipping between Zecora and Fluttershy rapidly, nervously. “No Applebloom to pester you all the time.”

“Fluttershy, thank you very kindly, for your kind offer has saved me most timely. And Big Mac, you sister does not drive me ‘round the bend, although I will admit to a sigh of relief when school holidays are at an end.”

Faust. Do I tell them or not. Twilight thought fretfully as the trio laughed together, gnawing on her bottom lip and shooting a nervous look to Luna, who noticed it, and gave a small shake of her head.

As Twilight and Luna followed the trio back to the Princesses camp, Twilight couldn’t help but look at the smoking windows of Zecora’s home and wonder just what else could go wrong today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Moments later, Canterlot, the Sparkle Residence.

“So … Trixie, is it?” Night Light began as he levitated a box of tissues across the coffee-table, trying to use the twin sneezes of his two ‘guests’ as an opportunity break the awkward atmosphere as his wife glared daggers at the two other Mares sitting on the other couch. “And miss … Surefoot?”

“It’s Sunset, Mr Twilight.” The red-and-gold maned Unicorn Mare replied tartly as she snatched up a tissue to wipe at her face, glaring right back at his wife. “We really do need to know where Twilight is. We have an … an issue, regarding one of the spells she created, and since she made the spell, only she can tell us how to fix the problems it has caused us.”

“I’m fairly certain the best fix for you involves a prison cell …” Twilight Velvet muttered.

“Velvet, dear, you’re not helping.” Night Light pointed out, knowing that that comment would cost him later. “Look, perhaps if you could explain what spell it was that is causing your issue, we could help?”

“The … apologetic and ashamed Trixie would prefer not to say. Trixie merely wishes to be rid of the spell, and this insufferable Mare, as soon as possible, and with as few Ponies know about the specifics as possible. And since The Great and Princess-y Twilight was the one who translated them from Neighponese, she is our best chance to end this curse.” Trixie replied, looking perfectly miserable as she tugged her hemp-cloth cloak tightly around her body, a posture that reminded Night Light of when a certain small Filly had accidentally cast a spell that made her shed all her fur at once.

“OH.” Velvet said, holding a hoof to her mouth. “Are you saying you got hold of those ancient Neighponese spells she was studying? I wasn't aware they were in public circulation yet!”

Night Light, having no idea what was going on, merely looked at his wife, bemused, as the famous, or as some would say, infamous author went from belligerently over-protective mother into sympathetic matriarch, at least towards this ‘Trixie’.

“Y-yes. You are aware of what they do?” Trixie nodded, looking at his wife with a hopeful smile spreading across her face, while this foul-tempered ‘Sunset’ just crossed her hooves and huffed.

“Considering I write romance novels for a living, and I've used them to help with my writing, yes, you can bet your last bit that I know what those spells do.” Velvet replied, smugly, pointing to the entire wall dedicated to the series she had written under the pen-name of ‘Hoof-Wetter’. Night Light just rolled his eyes and sighed, but remained standing, ready to leap between his wife and Sunset if their distaste for each other turned violent.

And considering how overly protective Twilight Velvet got in regards to their children, Night Light was fairly certain he’d have to protect Sunset, rather than his wife …

The looks the two Mares threw at his wife, and then him, made him rather nervous, especially since they kept looking at his plot.

“We-well. So, uhm, that means he … oh.”

“It’s always the quiet ones, isn’t it?”

“Oh, I didn’t mean I used them on Night Light, dears.” Twilight Velvet said after a burst of hysterical laughter, leaving Night Light even more confused, but certain that somehow his wife’s profession was impugning his masculinity. Again. “Look, I don’t know where Twilight is, but I do know that she keeps all her work in the Ponyville Library.”

“Really, oh, Trixie cannot thank you enough, Mrs Sparkle! Finally, Trixie will be rid of this burden and can finally go onto the stage again!”

“The first thing I’m going to do is choke Twilight with it!” Sunset muttered darkly, leading Night Light to wonder just what spell was involved.

“Sun only knows you’ve practiced enough on me.” Trixie pointed out, giving her … companion an annoyed look.

“Right back at you, Trixie the Quick and Easy.”

“Ahem. Well, assuming you can keep your ‘friend’ from shoving all four hooves into her mouth, Trixie, I’m sure Spike can find you the counter-spell. Just let me write a letter, so he won’t give you any trouble.” Twilight Velvet offered, cutting the two Mares fight off before it could get any worse. Which was a pity, as Night Light hadn’t seen a decent cat-fight between two pretty young Mares in ages.

Well, he assumed they were pretty. Other than their faces, their bodies were concealed by lumpy cloaks of rough, scratchy brown-hemp cloth, and they had steadfastly refused to remove the garments, Trixie breaking into tears when Twilight Velvet had demanded they disrobed before his wife had taken the blue Mare into another room, there’s been a startled shout, then a few moments of silence, and then they’d emerged with Twilight Velvet giving both Mares her permission to keep the cloaks on

A hastily written letter and the quick scarfing of his favourite oat-and-honey biscuits by the cloak-wearing and obviously starving Mares, a gushingly thankful Trixie and a surly Sunset pulled the hoods up on their cloaks and heading for the train station, Twilight Velvet began humming and dancing from hoof to hoof, a dreamy look on her face.

“Inspiration strikes again, my dear?” Night Light asked dryly, knowing full well what that look meant.

“Oh yes, oh yes, I think I’ve finally found a way around my writer’s block.” His wife replied, grinning broadly. “I’m going to need …”

“Yes yes, I know.” Night Light sighed, already moving to the supplies closet. “I’ll get the tarps and your ‘inspiration’ tools, then get myself down to the bar for the evening.” Where it’s safe.

Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

It had taken some white lies, and playing on Fluttershy’s love of all animals, no matter how terrifying they might appear, but Big Mac, Fluttershy and Zecora had diverted from their path back to the camp-site to pick some medicinal herbs to heal a baby Chimera that Twilight had spotted on the way back.

Time enough, hopefully, for Luna and Twilight to break down the tent, hide it in the portable hole and thus evade any questions about musky scent that no-doubt still clung to the fabric walls of the shelter.

“Buck. Me. Sideways.” Luna flinched as she heard Twilight swear, in a low-pitched voice and with a great deal of feeling, as the smaller Alicorn rounded the bend in the path before her that led back to their camp and then stopped in her tracks.

When Luna rounded the corner, thinking perhaps a Manticore had wandered into their camp, or worse still a mob of Canterlot’s scandal-chasing reporters, she tried to prepare herself for anything.

Seeing three more of Twilight’s Friends brawling in a cloud of dust just a few meters from the tent, hooves flying, was not something Luna was prepared for.

She’d always imagined them to be … harmonious. Literally. Always in sync, always friendly and understanding of each other.

The sight of a mane-pulling, face-slapping, plot-kicking brawl between three members of the Bearers of Harmony was so bizarre that Luna couldn’t help but suffer a hysterical bark of laughter that echoed through the clearing, making the three brawling Ponies flinch away from each other and stare at her in horror.

“Puh-Princess Luna! Oh mah gawsh, ahm so sorry!”

“No! No, don’t look at meeeeee, my mane is a total disaster!”

“Wait, now you show up? Damn it, Moonbu-!”

“Rainbow, darling, for the love of all that is good and gracious, SHUT YOUR TRAP!”

“Hoooo-boy, it’s gonna be one of those days.” Twilight muttered softly, reaching out with a wing to rub Luna’s neck as the Alicorn Princess took a step back in confusion as the Fashionista and Wonderbolt-trainee started to bicker again. “Sorry, Luna, these three have always had their differences. I can only imagine what’s set them off.”

“They are … rather aggressive. I had thought they were firm friends …” Luna whispered back as the tan-coated Farm-Pony, Applejack, interjected herself between the bickering Ponies and shoved a hoof into each of their mouths, grinning nervously at the two Princesses.

“Oh they are, but Rarity and Rainbow Dash are always butting heads, Applejack and Rainbow Dash are always competing physically, and Applejack and Rarity are polar opposites, personality-wise.” Twilight replied, giving a half-hearted shrug as the three Ponies separated, giving each other dark looks as they trotted over to the two Alicorns. “Normally it’s not nearly this bad … okay girls, what’s up? I haven’t seen you three this bad since Pinkie Pie ran short of her Red Velvet Cupcakes last month!”

“Errr, you could say we got lost … ‘couple of times. Where’s mah idjit brother an’ Fluttershy, Twi?” Applejack said loudly, pulling her Stetson hat down over her eyes in embarrassment at being caught fighting openly with her friends.

It was not lost on either Twilight or Luna that the stout farm-pony had placed herself between the marshmallow-white Rarity and the brilliant-blue Rainbow Dash, making herself into a living shield between the two as they continued their glaring contest.

“Ah, it appears that our … there was a problem last night with my Alicorn abilities, and a burst of Wild Magic flooded the Everfree Forest. Zecora’s house was damaged when several of her potions were mixed together by the storm of Wild Magic, so Fluttershy is taking Zecora to her house to stay until the fumes dissipate. Big Mac offered to escort them, and then we found a baby Manticore with a bruised wing, and well … they’re back along the trail, picking herbs for a poultice.” Twilight blurted out, her wing still on Luna’s neck. “Let’s just say today has been ‘interesting’ in more ways than one.”

Luna, having spent the past two-and-a-bit years in Canterlot, and having been Co-Ruler for Equestria for nearly two and a half thousand years before her … before the Nightmare Spirit had possessed her, knew how to read a Pony’s body-language, even if her grasp of the modern social customs was inadequate.

The white Unicorn, ‘Rarity’, seemed more interested in restoring her mane and coat to pristine conditions than the news, the tan-coloured Earth Pony, ‘Applejack’, immediately tensed up at the mention of ‘manticore’, making the Lunar Princess smile as she remembered the elder Apple sibling, Big Mac, having a similar reaction when Fluttershy found the cub whimpering in the Forest.

What surprised her most was the flash of rage, hastily smothered, that appeared on the face of the blue Pegasus, ‘Rainbow Dash’, and a glare that could have set stone on fire, directed at the place where Twilight’s wing rested gently on Luna’s neck.

What did I do wrong? Luna groaned mentally, finding the hooves of the three Ponies before her suddenly fascinating. I finally make new friends, and now one of them wants to rip me apart because Twilight is touching me.

“Be that as it may, Darling, we do need to … talk.” Rarity said, smiling sweetly even as her eyes flicked over Luna and Twilight, and then back to the tent.

Oh, Buck. Luna swore internally.

“Yeah. Can y’all explain this ‘magical entanglement’ thingy Celestial mentioned in her letter to mah brother?” Applejack added, confusion evident on her face. “Issit some sorta spell Twilight goofed up?”

Oh double-Buck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Big Mac had learned two things today.

One, even baby Manticores were heavy, and like all babies, cubs, foals, hatchlings and pups, they had a tendency to put things in their mouth, like his mane, and use it like a pacifier.

Two, walking behind Zecora and Fluttershy was hazardous for his health, as he found his eyes wandering from Fluttershy’s demurely swaying and well-toned flanks to Zecora’s boisterously bouncing bubble-butt, and had nearly sent both himself and his dozing cargo tumbling off the path several times because he wasn’t watching the path for stones and dips.

All things considered, he felt quite grateful to the Manticore cub on his back, as its presence and the constant need to focus on stopping it from slipping off his back helped him keep Little Mac under control and out of sight, as he was quite sure that having either one of the Mares turn around and see him aiming the old Apple Family sauce-maker at them with a baby on his back would have opened up a whole can of awkward between them all.

“…and we can go to the Spa with Rarity, and I can finally introduce you to the Cakes! Oh, this is going to be just perfect, Zecora!” Fluttershy was saying, almost bouncing for joy.

“Fun as that sounds, are you sure this is fine, you have many animals to feed, are you not counting every dime?” The Zebra replied, even though there was a broad smile on her face.

“Oh its fine, it’s fine, I have some coupons I’ve been saving. Oooh, this is going to be great, I finally can have a sleep-over at my place!”

This is getting’ mighty weird. Big Mac thought to himself, noticing how close the two Mares were, literally bumping Cutie-Marks at times. Maybe Zecora didn’t know, or care, but for Fluttershy to be so … flirtatious shocked Big Mac something fierce. Fluttershy’s not … that way inclined, is she? Oh buck, what if ah scared her off Stallions for life? OH BUCK! No … no … calm down, Big Mac, she’s just happy to help a friend, that’s it …

Slap slap slap went the Cutie Marks before him once again, Zecora’s round, jiggling flanks slapping against Fluttershy’s shapely, toned ones as the path narrowed, and the two Mares were forced closer together, neither one aware of the show they were putting on for the ‘fortunate’ Stallion behind them.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuck. Ah can't hold Little Mac back for much longer at this rate!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Yes, well … how do I say this?” Luna’s ears flattened against her skull as she waited for the white-coated Unicorn to say her part, trying desperately to ignore the shouting match going on between the orange-coated Farm Pony and the Cyan-blue Wonderbolt-Trainee about some ‘Moob-Ut’ as Twilight desperately disassembled the tent and started packing it away in the Portable Hole.

“Perhaps you should just come out with it, Miss Rarity.” Luna grated, trying to remain civil as her emotions raged inside of her, the stress and pressure of the past few weeks threatening to boil over. Part of her wanted to scream at this Unicorn for daring to question her Princess, another part wanted to beg Rarity to swear to forget what she knew, and another part still just wanted to grab Twilight and take wing into the deepest, darkest part of the Everfree and just hide till everypony forgot about them.

“Well, I don’t wish to be rude …”

“Just. Say. Your. Piece.” The Lunar Princess growled, focusing her glare on the Unicorn’s hooves.

For several moments there was only silence before an annoyed huff broke from the Unicorn’s lips. “Very well. Just what are your intentions towards my friend, Princess Luna? I know what the tent smelled like. I noticed the hitch in Twilight’s step. And I am aware that Twilight has never had a romantic relationship before in her life.”

“My inten … that is private, Miss Rarity. Understand this, if so much as one word of this gets out, you will find making enemies of both of the Royal Sisters is a very poor choice to make.” Luna’s head snapped up, her eyes glaring into Rarity’s own and making the smaller Pony flinch and take a half-step back at the implications of that statement. “My sister cares deeply for Twilight, and I will not allow careless gossip to threaten Twilight’s position as a Princess. You are obviously aware of the magical entanglement between myself and Twilight, and being a Unicorn yourself, I can imagine you know intimately what happens when two compatible magical essences comingle?”

“I … have read up on the topic, yes.” The Unicorn replied softly, not meeting Luna’s eyes. “A-and she is my friend too.”

“Well then, you can surely understand when two very powerful magical essences that have such an affinity for each other meet, even accidentally, that the resulting consequences are equally powerful. Neither Twilight nor myself are certain of where we stand with each other right now, or what the future holds for us.” The Alicorn snapped, blushing furiously as she remembered the time Twilight and herself had spent together in the water, willingly, without the Sympathy moving them. “Twilight has already been targeted relentlessly by the gossip-magazines, and I am constantly besieged by slander that I am still Nightmare Moon, merely biding my time to unleash an unending darkness on the world once again. I cannot, will not, allow anything to ruin Twilight before she even has the chance to show Equestria her true worth. Not even her friends.”

“How dare you! Y-you think I would use my friends to advance my position in society?” Rarity gasped, her cheeks colouring, either in embarrassment or rage, Luna did not know.

“Your file suggests that you have done just that. When you went to Canterlot and encountered Fancy Pants, you all but abandoned your friends to try to gain patronage amongst the Nobility. You are an avid reader of the gossip-magazines and subscribe to no less than fifteen different editions, not including your fashion magazines, and treat every word as gospel. And you have consistently expressed a desire to ‘join’ the upper echelons of society, at one stage even attempting to seduce Prince Blueblood, of all Ponies, at the Gala.” The dark-coloured Alicorn rattled off her points, noting how the white Unicorn’s jaw had opened in shock.

“M-my file? Celestia has a file on me?” The fashionista whispered hoarsely, her eyes widening and fixating on Luna, filling with a wild panic.

“You are a Bearer of an Element of Harmony, Miss Rarity. Did you think that meant nothing would change, that your life could just carry on as it always had?” Luna pointed out, feeling very concerned as she witnessed the change in Rarity’s body-posture. Had Celestia truly not told them about the bodyguards? “All of the Bearers have constant ‘shadows’ protecting and monitoring them at every hour of the day. You are our greatest weapon, and thus weakness, in this day and age. To just let you wander around where any other nation might just swoop in to a quiet little town and snatch you up would be unthinkable.”

“We’re being watched? By who? How? What about our privacy?” Rarity hissed, looking more frightened than angry now.

“Telling you who they are would defeat the purpose of their shadowing you and your friends, Miss Rarity, but your privacy, what you do in your own home, is still yours and yours alone. Celestia and I refuse to take that from you, at least.” Trying to salvage the situation, Luna walked forwards and placed a hoof on the Unicorn’s back and began rubbing the other Pony’s back as she began to tremble and hyperventilate. “Breathe, Miss Rarity. I know it is a lot to take in. I apologise, I had thought Celestia had already informed you all of the shadows protecting you.”

“It is just … bodyguards … it’s a lot to take in.” Rarity whispered, eyes flicking from Luna to Twilight and back again.

“Indeed. Now that Twilight has become an Alicorn, I fear things will only get worse, and by association, you and the other Element Bearers will also have to deal with greater threats than just Discord and Changeling Invasions.” Removing her hoof from Rarity’s back, Luna used it to lift the Unicorn’s head up, to look the fashionist in the eye. “I understand you are Twilight’s friend, just as I am, and you fret for her sake. But both of us are Princesses, and what we want, or may want, must always come second to what Equestria needs from us. Please, don’t make this situation we find ourselves in any more muddled. I cannot bear the thought of losing my friendship with Twilight.”

“I will keep the secret, Princess Luna, if that’s what you’re asking. But I do worry for Twilight, if only because you are the first lover she’s ever known.” Rarity’s face bore a sad smile as she bowed to the Lunar Princess. “I fear that you’ll break her heart no matter what you do.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“This is complete manure!” Rainbow Dash yelled, struggling vainly against the ropes that bound her limbs and wings securely against her body. “I can’t believe you, Applejack!”

“Now listen here, sugar-cube! Ah don’ much like Twilight bein’ off in the Everfree Forest, an’ ah don’ like that it’s just her an’ Luna anymore than you do, but callin’ Luna names ain’t helping matters.” The farm-Pony yelled back, tightening the knots as fast as the Pegasus could try to loosen them.

“I’m not calling her names, she is a moody moon-butt!”

“Yah ain’t helpin’ yah case, Dashie.”

“So … uh …” Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash twitched as Twilight walked up to them, a broad, nervous smile on her face. “I’m … ah … not sure what you know, but … ah …”

“Look, Twilight, first things first.” Applejack interrupted, holding up a hoof to stall her friend’s no-doubt neurotic explanation. “First, we’re mighty steamed at you about not sending us letters …”

“I’m so sorry, I ….”

“Ah ain’t finished yet, sugar-cube. We’re upset that you’ve all but ignored Ponyville for the past month, but we get you were getting’ worried ‘bout them darn gossip-ponies getting’ hold of your letters and makin’ up stories ‘bout you ‘gain.” The farm-Pony continued, giving her friend a stern look when she interrupted. “We jus’ want you to promise to visit us, let us know you still remember us. Let us know we’re still your friends, you understand?”

For a few moments there was only silence before Twilight broke into hiccupping sobs, rushing forwards to hug Applejack and babble how sorry she was.

Rainbow Dash, for her part, desperately yearned to be part of the hug, but Applejack’s ropes still bound her, and at best all she could do was look on and try to wriggle free of Applejack’s knots.

“I-I-I ran out of Dragon’s Fire to send the scrolls, and I wasn’t allowed out of the castle after the ‘Clack’ incident, and I …” Twilight blubbered, clinging to Applejack like a drowning pony as the sturdy farm-Pony stroked her neck.

“What, wait, wait.” Rainbow yelled, drawing the attention of the other two Ponies. “What’s this ‘Clack’ thingy you’re talking about? And explain this ‘entanglement’ business! Why are you and Moonbutt the Moody stuck out here in the Everfree Forest? Why can’t you just come back to Ponyville and let us help you?”

Twilight bit her lip and let go of Applejack, retreating both physically and emotionally as her eyes flicked from where Luna was circling Rarity, a ferocious look on her face, and then back to Applejack and Rainbow.

“I … can’t go into too much detail.” She began, before Rainbow and Applejack began to complain.

“OH FOR BUCK’S SAKE, WHY NUUURRPFH!” Rainbow shouted angrily before Applejack put a hoof in her mouth.

“Twi, you ain’t helpin’ matters by keepin’ secrets from us.” Applejack cautioned, struggling to hold the furious Pegasus down.

“It’s not … Applejack, I love you like the sister I never had, but you could not keep a secret if all of Equestria depended upon it. You’re incapable of lying.” Twilight began, rubbing at her temples as if in pain. “No offense meant, but you’re just terrible at it. You’re the Element of Honesty, after all.”

“Darn tootin’.” Applejack agreed with pride, despite her irritation.

“And Rainbow Dash would throw herself into a hurricane if it meant saving her friends. But … you have to admit, Rainbow, you’re too angry, and when you’re angry you don’t think about what you’re doing. And it’s not Luna’s fault this is all happening, it’s just an accident because I …” Taking a deep breath, Twilight straightened her posture and stared right at her friends. “Please, understand it’s not because I don’t trust you two, but sooner or later the media-Ponies are going to come looking to you for their stories. They will spy on you, pressure you, hound you all day long, to get what they want. It won’t matter what you say, if you say anything at all they can then turn around and print whatever they want unless you have some method to record the conversation to use as evidence in the courts. And even then, the law intended to protect the journalists from punitive measures from the Nobility got all twisted up, and now even if they print an absolute lie, all they get is a slap on the wrist as punishment.”

“I don’t want either of your futures to get ruined because of me. If you don’t know what’s going on, you can’t be pressured into talking, and believe me, they will go to extreme lengths to get their stories.” Twilight continued, tears gathering in her eyes. “I’ve had Ponies in weather balloons using long-range cameras trying to take pictures of me when I was in the bath, or getting dressed for court, I’ve had maids in the castle try to steal my letters before I sent them to you to sell to the gossip magazines, my parents are even watched constantly by the paparazzi and are having their mail stolen every day! I don’t want my friends to have their lives under the scrutiny of those horrible Ponies!”

This time, when Rainbow Dash managed to get her hooves freed from the ropes, Applejack didn’t strive to bind her again, and the two Ponies rushed over and hugged their friend as she broke into sobs again, begging them to understand.

“So you’re out here with Luna because those jack-holes keep harassing you?” Rainbow asked, her irritation with Luna warring with how guilty she felt towards Twilight. Her friend had been carrying all these burdens to try and stop it spilling over onto her friends, and Rainbow had been ready to call Twilight a bad friend.

“Well … *sniffle* … mostly. But … look, you guys can’t say anything about this to anyone, alright? Pinkie Promise me this.” Twilight whispered in their ears.

“Cross my heart, hope to die …” Applejack whispered the first part of the promise.

“Stick a cup-cake in my eye.” And Rainbow whispered the second, and all three couldn’t help but giggle as they heard a faint “I heaaaaaard that!” from the direction of Ponyville.

“Heh, see sugar-cube, we’re fine. Pinkie will do her thing, an’ those lousy reporters will have to deal with the ‘Pie Avenger’ if they stick their noses into our business.” The orange farm-Pony pointed out, which seemed to cause a lot of the stress to drain out of Twilight’s body. “Now, tell us what you can, Twi, so we can stop worryin’ ‘bout you an’ Luna an’ help you both out.”

“Well … Luna and I are … uhm … every time we use magic near each other, we … uhm … feel each other. And it’s embarrassing.” The Unicorn mumbled, still sniffling, and tried to break the hug, only for Applejack and Rainbow to step forwards, refusing to let her go. “It’s … something that’s going to cause a lot of chaos, so we’re out in the Everfree where, if something does go wrong, our magic won’t cause problems for other Ponies.”

“You ‘feel’ each other?” Applejack said softly, and Twilight nodded nervously. “Like, you feel each other’s presence, or you feel each other’s magic?”

“Uhm … a bit of both. It’s hard to explain, and it’s rather physically draining, truth be told. The paparazzi would have a field-day with us if they ever found out. We, uhm … sort of … oh buck it all, every time Luna or I cast a spell around each other, we really feel it and it makes us all tingly and uhm …have issues with self-control around each other.”

“…You mean you get drunk from each other’s spells?” Rainbow asked, confused. Applejack had turned red and had loosened her hug on Twilight from ‘tight hug’ to ‘loosely holding’.

“Ah … yeah, let’s go with that.” Twilight mumbled, blushing furiously.

“Now wait a darn minute. Are you sayin’ you’re a …” Applejack said, giving Twilight a stern look.

“No! Well … maybe? I don’t know, I don’t think I am. I mean, it’s not like I woke up and went “Hey, I’m going to trot on the other side of the fence today!”, it just … happened!” The purple Alicorn spluttered, turning from pink to red now.

“Riiiight. ‘Cause ah remember Cherilee was all kinds of upset when you said you weren’t interested in that kind of thing.” Applejack pointed out, and Rainbow looked at her friend in confusion.

“Wait, what does the school-teacher have to do with this?”

“Why would she be … wait. WAIT! Are you telling me when she asked for me to come for detention after school let out that one time, she was asking me if I wanted to ...” Twilight’s stammering turned into quiet choking noises as the new Princess stood there, pupils shrinking to pin-pricks.

“Faust dammit Twi …” Applejack sighed, pulling her Stetson hat down over her face. “How can somepony so smart be so dang dumb?”

“Seriously, what the heck does Cherilee needing help with detention have to do with Twilight getting drunk on Moonbutt’s magic?”

Aggravatingly enough, all Twilight did was make a thin, high-pitched whining noise, and Applejack just kept her hat over her face, grumbling under her breath.

“WILL SOMEPONY EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE BUCK IS GOING ON ALREADY?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sometime Later

“So … today has been … odd.” Twilight said, trying desperately to strike up conversation with Luna, who was still seemed frustrated and depressed with how things had gone with Rarity, Applejack and Rainbow Dash earlier that day.

“Odd is one way to describe it. Disastrous. Horrible. A complete mess also fit quite well.” Luna replied in a very flat tone where she was setting up her side of the tent, their new camp-site only a half-hour's trot from where they had been but well shielded from the air by a pair of willow-trees whose branches had tangled together above the tiny clearing on the river bank. “Your friend Rarity knows … knows what we have done. And she said something to me that I … I do not want to believe. And for some reason, Rainbow Dash seems to hate me.”

“Ah … Rainbow Dash just gets annoyed with anything that stops her doing what she wants. Rainbow wanted to teach me to fly, that’s all, so she’s probably blaming everyone in Canterlot for getting in her way, and you’re just an obvious target.” Giving a nervous laugh, Twilight looked over to her lover, and noticed Luna’s ears had been pressed flat against her skull. “Luna? Luna, there’s got to be more to it than my friends being off today.”

Luna remained silent. All she did in response was hunch over, bite her lower lip and refused to meet Twilight’s gaze as she fiddled uselessly with her bedding.

“Luna? What’s wrong?” Twilight called out as her sense of worry grew over Luna’s response, or lack of one.

“I just … Twilight, have you really never been in a relationship?” Luna croaked, still not looking at Twilight, and flinched when Twilight crossed the short distance between them and hugged Luna from behind.

“No, this is my first real romantic relationship.” Twilight whispered, hugging Luna tightly and smiling as she felt Luna’s hooves come up to rest atop her own. “Unless you count admiring Big Mac’s plot as he works. Or when I tried to sabotage Shining Armor and Cadence’s dates because I didn’t want my brother to take away my foal-sitter.”

“You did what to my niece?” Luna asked softly, grinning a little as she turned to look over her shoulder at Twilight. “I don’t remember her telling me about that.”

“I think I might have done her a favour showing her my brother’s Playcolt magazines. I think it was after I pulled that stunt that they stopped ‘seeing’ each other around me, but I remember that Shining Armor kept on coming home with a really goofy expression on his face, and I wondered what these ‘training exercises’ were that made him so happy.” Twilight explained, giving Luna a squeeze as both Mares giggled. “Speaking of which, I need to remind Spike that he needs to hide his Neighponese comics better. Some of them are a bit … well, a bit too erotic to be left lying around.”

“Exactly how does a baby Dragon get his claws on Neighponese comics? Wait, no, that’s not important!” Luna began, before bursting into giggles again as Twilight’s hooves trailed up and down her flanks. “Aahaha, Twilight, no, I’m trying to be se-hehe-serious!”

“So am I. Luna, I have no idea what I’m doing, if this is right or what our friends, or your sister, will think of us.” Twilight whispered into Luna’s ear, wrapping her wings around the other Alicorn as she cuddled up against Luna’s back. “I just … I lo-luh-luh-like you. I want to stay, like this, with you, being happy and having fun, being together, taking everything one step at a time. I don’t know how to be a girlfriend, I had to take lessons on how to be a friend, for Faust’s sake. I know we’re going to make mistakes, maybe this will work, maybe it won’t, but I …”

Twilight was interrupted by Luna firmly pulling her off the older Alicorn’s back and into an embrace that almost smothered Twilight underneath Luna’s limbs and wings as the Lunar Princess cradled Twilight to her chest.

“Just promise me, Twilight, you’ll stay my friend, no matter what.” Luna whispered into the cocoon she’d made of her wings that held Twilight captive. “I don’t think I could live with myself if I drove you away.”

“I promise.” Twilight whispered back as she snuck her hooves back around Luna’s body, holding her friend tightly.

“I promise.”

At least nothing else can go wrong today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The uncomfortable tableau held for agonizing minutes, the eyes of the combatants locked onto each other, before the Cutie Mark Crusaders all sneezed at once, causing their quarry to squeal in rage at being pelted with pony boogers.

Applebloom, Sweetie Bell, Scootaloo and Angel all turned to look at Mayor Mare’s place of work, the Council Hall, where Ponies were tumbling from the windows and doors, holding their noses and screaming in horror and rage as the stink-bombs intended to flush the rabbit out of hiding went off all at once, flooding the building with noxious vapors found only in the public toilets behind Manuel the Donkey’s burrito-stand after triple-bean-and-quintuple-cheese-and-chilli night happened with expired ingredients and plenty of complimentary cheap imported pear-cider.

“This never happened. We were at Fluttershy’s place, lookin’ after Angel.” Applebloom muttered, slowly backing away as some poor fool of a Unicorn tried to use their magic to create a light, and gouts of flame shot out of the second-storey windows, devouring the dull grey-green miasma of the stink-bombs.

“Yeaaaah … all peaceful-like. At Fluttershy’s place. No-where near any fart-gas or screaming Ponies.” Scootaloo agreed, creeping away after her earth-pony friend.

Angel, for his part, raising a paw towards the screams and grinned. Thus the end of the Ponies’ benevolent dictatorship began. This was the beginning of the Dominion of Angel the Bunny! Their cities would burn, their trees chopped to the ground, their homes razed, and fields of carrots would be tilled, continuously, relentlessly, the Ponies working till they died to produce carrots, endless carrots to feed his hordes of offspring and harems of willing females, for he would be Angel, slayer of Ponies and Overlord of all Rabbitdom! GOD-KING OF …

And then the tiny rabbit’s dreams of Canterlot in flames ended when Sweetiebell grasped him with her magic and snuck off after her friends, paying no attention at all to the tiny, high-pitched squeaks of rage coming from the would-be God-King of Equestria in her clutches or the hysterical demands of Mayor Mare that her stinking, on-fire employees stop screaming and form a committee to determine who would be fired for this debacle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Somewhere outside of Equestria’s borders, sunset.

“Majesty.” The Drone murmured, eyeing his Queen nervously, noting how much attention she paid to her new, bizarre brood with a touch of jealousy, and a larger dose of worry as all three of the offspring sneezed at once, causing Chrsyalis to fuss over them.

Changelings weren’t born, they hatched. Fully capable of handling their duties, even if they were a quarter of their adult size.

This brood was … small. Squishy. Helpless. Almost as big a drain on the Hive as their crippled, dying Queen was. Were it not for how dire the situation was, the Drone was sure that the Queen would have otherwise left this defective batch to die and spawned a new, more normal brood, but the Hive could not risk waiting for months for Chrysalis to produce more eggs, assuming she even could in her current condition.

And yet just looking at the soft, chitin-less brood filled the Drone with … squishy feelings. Feelings the Drone only experienced when feeding on a Pony or other sentient creature, yet he knew that he was drawing no love-energy from the brood.

“Speak.” Chrysalis replied softly, lifting up one of the brood to nuzzle at its, no, her soft belly, which made it squeal with laughter before she gently lowered it to snuggle back against the others, against her belly, which had taken on a distinctly Pony-like appearance, including two large teats full of, of all things, milk for the Brood.

If he hadn’t seen them come out of the Queen in person, terrified and powerless as his beloved Queen thrashed and screamed and howled in pain as the small, bizarre little Changelings forced their way out her ovipositor, the Drone would have sworn they were normal Ponies …

“We have found a cave for the Hive to spend the night in. Do we set up camp for the night, or press on?”

Do we rush forwards, starving the Drones, or do we spend the night here, let them rest, and risk you dying in the night?

The words were not spoken, but they were present in both of their minds.

“Set up the camp tonight, and prepare to harvest as much Love-energy as we safely can from the Kattians without risking their health over the next few days.” Chrysalis said after almost a minute’s silence, her mind shrouded from the Hive-Mind, but the colours of her fear, and her doubt, were clearly visible to the Drone. “Give what Love-Brew we can spare to the Scouts, and bring me whatever parchment and ink we have left. We will set up a temporary camp in the cave and let the Hive recover its strength while the Scouts seek out an audience with Celestia.”

The Hive Mind was silent for precious moments as the self-aware Drones considered the Queen’s plan. It was risky, but they were so hungry. Without having to harvest on the hoof, they could produce much more Love-Brew from the Kattians than they previously had, and the overflowing love from the strange cat-like creatures would allow each and every Drone to refill their reserves to the fullest, rather than leaving them on a starvation diet like they had been.

“Are the Scouts to go in disguise?” The Drone asked, wincing as the disturbingly squishy feelings returned as he watched two of the Queen’s latest, and probably last, brood hugged each other and began play-wrestling, squeaking adorably at each other.

“No. They are to go in their own chitin, and to bear these ‘white flags’ that the Ponies use to mark their peaceful messengers.” Sighing heavily, Chrysalis shifted awkwardly in her nest of rags and shed Kattian fur, her brood whining as their perch by her warm, life-giving teats was disturbed. “We are running out of time, and the dried fish we prepared for the Kattians is running low. I will give each scout a message for the Ponies, that I am willing to turn myself over to their courts for punishment, if they will allow me to pass on my title as Queen to my Daughters and spare my Drones.”

“They may kill the scouts on sight, Majesty. We do not know how our kidnapping in Ponyville has affected their attitude towards our kind.” The Drone commented as the Hive Mind buzzed with the self-aware Drones’ thoughts.

“No. These are Ponies, my Drone. Even at their worst, they will at least allow the scouts to surrender. And for the privilege of bring myself, the great and terrible Queen Chrysalis, to Canterlot and under their custody to face justice for my ‘crimes’?” The Changeling Queen gave a quiet, bitter chuckle at her own words. “I think my capture would be a significant boost to any Border-Captain’s career.”

“No, my dear, dear Drone, I suspect the hardest part will be making sure that the Border-Guards don’t start fighting each other over who will claim custody of my head.”

Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11

Fluttershy's cottage, day 2, late afternoon.

“Well, that the baby manticore dealt with, your animals fed, your gutters cleaned … anything else, miss Fluttershy?” Big Mac asked, sweating profusely in the afternoon sun.

Following Zecora and Fluttershy home had been a torture in and of itself, for not only had he been unable to get a word in edge-wise between the two Mares, but the hour-long trip of watching their plots bounce and jiggle the entire way had strained even the infamously stoic farm-Pony’s resolve.

So to apologise, even if they weren’t aware of his staring or dirty thoughts, Big Mac had offered to take care of Fluttershy’s out-doors chores while she and Zecora made the arrangements for two Mares to share the house.

“Ah, no, I think that’s it, Big Mac. Thank you for, uhm, doing all this.” Fluttershy mumbled, hiding behind her hair again and making Big Mac’s heart pound for a different reason. “Wo-would you like some lemonade?”

“Much obliged, miss Fluttershy, but I should really get goin’. Ah need to get that wagon back from the Everfree Forest first thing in the morning, an’ I’m a bit ripe.” Big Mac replied, wishing he had the courage to just stallion-up and go inside.

Of course, a certain grinning Zebra that was watching from a nearby window could also be blamed for the lack of confidence the burly farm-Pony felt. She’d pretty much ogled him the entire time he’d been outside, and knowing full well that Zecora had him by the balls, in a variety of different meanings of the term, crippled Big Mac’s courage.

“Oh … well, at least have a glass of lemonade before you go!” Fluttershy protested, ducking inside and coming out with a tall, frosty glass of lemonade and a towel.

Realising this was as far as he’d get today, Big Mac smiled, nodded, drank the lemonade, revelling in how cool it was and the fact he was having Fluttershy’s home-made cooking, after a fashion, and towelled the sweat off his face.

“Much obliged, miss Fluttershy. Please, take care, and if you need, uhm, anything, you just let me know, alright?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fluttershy felt her hind legs rub together, savouring the itchy heat as she watched Big Mac trot off to his family’s farm, his dark red coat glistening with sweat and rippling over his thick, rugged muscles.

Always so kind. Always so gently spoken. And yet she had seen him knock a tree over with a single kick, and pull a wagon filled with apples that would have been a struggle for two stallions with almost no effort.

She had always wondered if that gentleness would hold up in the bedroom, a haunting dream fuelled by her inability to forget that one time the pair of them had gotten drunk and ducked behind the Apple family’s barn …

And then I kneed him in the groin … Fluttershy whimpered as she remembered how Big Mac’s eyes had bulged and his deep, wonderful voice had come out as a choked whimper as he fell to the ground in a crumpled heap.

Walking inside, Fluttershy sighed, wondering when she’d ever work up the courage to invite Big Mac inside for ‘lemonade’ again. Today had been almost perfect … perhaps tomorrow?

But for now … her wing flexed, bringing the towel she’d given Big Mac to wipe his sweat off to her face, where she stood on her hind legs, leaned against the front door and pushed the sweaty towel to her muzzle with both front-hooves, inhaling deeply of the musky, spicy scent Big Mac had left in the cloth.

“Goodness Fluttershy, your need must be great, your wings are so hard I swear they almost vibrate!”

“EEEP!” Fluttershy squeaked, hiding the sweat-stained towel behind her as Zecora winked at her from the couch, which the Zebra Shaman claimed as her bed for her ‘sleep over’ at Fluttershy’s cottage. “Ze-ze-ze-zecora, no, I was just, uhm, checking to see if it needed to be washed, is all!”

“If that is true, then I rule Equestria! Why don’t you just jump him, by the beard of Celestia?” Zecora shot back, grinning broadly. “Don’t wash that towel, it would be a crime, scented with his sweat, it must smell divine.”

“ZECORA!” Fluttershy squeaked, her eyes going wide as dinner-plates.

“And if you want not the towel, give it to me, for I remember Big Mac’s ‘pride’, and I am filled with ne~!”

“ZECORA!” Fluttershy squeaked louder, her hooves going to her mouth in shock, almost shoving the towel into her orifice as her eyes grew wider still.

“Surely you don’t object, since you won’t chase Big Mac, if I try my luck, and see if he’ll wear me like a hat!”

And with that, Fluttershy’s eyes rolled into the back of her head, the butter-coloured Pegasus fainting dead away even as her wings remained hard as steel.

“Well, that was strange, she’s taken my teasing before, I wonder what’s different, that could knock her to the floor?” Zecora asked out loud as she got up and picked up the Pegasus, dragging her to the couch, when she heard a squeak by the stairs that led to the Pegasus’s bedroom.

Wondering what animal it was that was coming down to inspect her this time, she looked up to see three familiar little fillies, covered in dust-bunnies and scratches and holding an irate-looking rabbit, staring at her with furious blushes across their faces.

“When in Tartarus did you three come from? We’ve been tidying up the house and saw no-one!” Zecora shouted, going pale as she imagined being grilled by Rarity, Applejack and Scootaloo’s Guardian, whoever that was, about the language the three precocious fillies would be going home with.

“Uh, we were trying to be Cutie Mark Crusader Rabbit Catchers … we’ve been chasing Angel around in the rabbit-warrens out back.” Applebloom replied softly.

“Literally through the warrens.” Scootaloo muttered, shaking her wings and dislodging several clods of dirt onto the carpet.

“Uhm …. Zecora? What’d you mean by Fluttershy jumping Big Mac? You mean like playing Leap-Frog?” Sweetie Belle offered, smiling far, far too broadly for the Zebra’s tastes.

Zecora looked down to the comatose Fluttershy, to the trio of blushing, grinning Fillies no doubt eager to rush home and ask their parents just what Zecora had meant, and then Zecora stared out the window, gazing upon Ponyville … and its insane inhabitants.

“Caught me you have, your silence I crave, tell me what you want, I am forced to be your slave.” The Zebra Shaman sighed as the three Fillies began bouncing up and down eagerly.

“HOORAY! Cutie Mark Crusader Zebra Shamans.”

“Oh bucking why, not fair at all, my house is wrecked, now I must bear this gall?” Zecora moaned out loud as the Cutie Mark Crusaders rushed upstairs, shouting about getting some makeup to give themselves stripes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia found the Day Court to be, for the first time in years, entertaining.

Having Discord in her corner, so to say, was at turns endearing, heart-warming and terrifying. He’d just pop into the Court, have a natter with her whenever he felt like it, then pat her on the shoulder, give her a hoof bump or, in the last case, a hug and then pop out again.

And of course the Court went into an absolute uproar over the Chaos Aspect laying paws or claws on their beloved Princess, until Celestia had told them all to let it go, Discord was not only reformed but trying to be a good friend.

“Do I look upset?” Celestia asked loudly as an effeminate Noble shouted about the ‘audacity’ of Discord touching Celestia. “Or, to phrase it better, did I look upset when Discord was trying to be a friend and gave me a hug?”

“Uh … a little?” The Noble replied as the Court looked on and whispered.

“I am perfectly capable of deciding when I am or am not upset, Limp Wilting. I do not require you, or anypony else for that matter, to get offended on my behalf, thank you very much.” Celestia continued, throwing a bit more of the Canterlot Voice into her speech than truly required for the situation as she gave a sweeping ‘look’ to the assembled Court. “Now, as amusing as it is having my little Ponies trying to tell me how I should feel, did we not have several issues before the Court to attend to first?”

Unfortunately, the topic quickly turned to the Gryphonia issue, with a small portion of the Court, including most of the Nobles whose wealth depended upon the complex import/export agreements with the combative Gryphons, to appease their parliament, while the bulk of the Court seemed torn between just letting the situation pass after Celestia’s display of power had apparently cowed the Gryphonia Parliment, if not their clergy, and delivering a punitive measure against the unstable coalition of States that made up Gryphonia as punishment for threatening Equestria.

“An embargo on the food we supply them would certainly teach those overgrown chickens a lesson in manners!”

“Don’t be an idiot. The members of their Parliament pushing for a war with Equestria wouldn’t starve, and all we’d do is be punishing their civilians, which would give them a reason to hate us.”

“They already hate us!”

“If we keep up the food trade, but put an embargo on their exports, the rugs and the rest?”

“That would drive my family bankrupt!”

“They export more than rugs, you dolt!”

“What else can they export? Have you seen Gryphonia? It’s desert, as far as the eye can see, with a handful of rivers cutting through it and the odd oasis here and there? What else do they export, dirt, heat and misery?”

“Cinnamon, opium for our pain-killers, they are also the largest supplier of diamonds in the known world!”

“Oh horrors, we’ll not have cinnamon in our chai lattes, we’ll have to make do with without addictive medication and … other than jewellery, what do we use diamonds for anyways?”

“Disgraceful, the military still needs Celestia to bail them out of trouble. What will we do if she can’t pick up the slack next time?”

“Agreed, my good Duke! And with Cadence being a pacifist, Luna one push away from becoming that horrid Nightmare creature again, and Twilight Sparkle proving to be a disappointment of a Princess …”

“…Conscription? Have you considered that our sons would also be conscripted if we pushed that through the Court? You might like the idea of your sons on the front lines, but mine haven’t produced heirs for the family yet!”

“I’m sure we could pressure one of the Generals to make a ‘Champagne’ unit. You know, keep them out of the actual fighting …”

“You don’t pay much attention to that side of the Court, do you? We’ve got Thestrals, Pegasi, Earth Ponies and even a Minotaur as Generals. The days of dignified Unicorns leading our army is dead and gone, thanks to these ‘reforms’ Celestia is allowing the Commoners to foist upon us with their petitions!”

Faust give me strength. Celestia groaned internally, ancient spell-work in the Throne-room allowing her to listen to, and record, scores of conversations heard within the grand Court-hall all at once. Half of my Court is more interested in making money off of a potential war, and the other half is either in the pockets of Gryphonia or want us to go to war out of pride.

Not for the first time, the Solar Princess mentally patted herself on the back for removing the archaic laws that allowed only the Nobility to hold the highest ranks within the military. She’d gotten it past the Court by letting them think it was to stop elevating ‘commoners’ who distinguished themselves in times of war to the peerage, but when she made it a point to Knight every Commander and General, thus making them honorary members of the peerage, and their Knighthoods, combined with their military rank, the new 'law' gave gave her Common-born Generals just enough pull to be able order around most of the Nobility. Sadly it had also enraged the Nobility of that generation and it had taken years of placating and outright threats to get them to stop petitioning her to reverse the removal of the law.

Finally, after three hours of meandering debates that often ended in shouting matches between opposing Nobles, Celestia called for an hour-long recess to allow everypony to eat and calm themselves, and retreated to her private chambers for a meal.

In truth, she merely wished to study the bush Discord had brought to her, and to plot.

If only Gryphonia wasn’t at risk of falling apart again. So many problems lay between her and the first thing in centuries that Celestia the Pony wanted, rather than what Celestia the Princess needed to do, and the frustration boiled within her, eroding Celestia’s tolerance.

She would have taken a holiday for herself once Luna and Twilight came back from their ‘training exercise’, Faust knew it had been centuries since her last real holiday, but Equestria lacked the military might and the funds to handle having the ‘United’ States of Gryphonia falling onto each other in an orgy of tribal warfare.

Luna still lacked a firm enough grasp of the modern world to fully utilize the Army to its full potential, and Twilight was born in an era of peace, and would balk at violence until there was no other choice, which would prove horribly costly in lives if the Gryphons were given a chance to dig in and prepare themselves for a long, drawn-out war.

The last time Gryphonia had descended into barbarism, the Border had been flooded with refugees trying to get away from the wholesale slaughter of entire Tribes, and naturally enough the Ponies of the time had welcomed the fleeing, starving Gryphons into their communities, and all seemed well on the Equestrian side of the Border, until two particularly large groups of refugees were brought into Manehattan and were settled on the same city-block. Two groups of rival refugees.

The bloodbath had lasted for the better part of two weeks with the Gryphon tribes tearing each other apart in the streets, hunting down and killing each other’s hatchlings, butchering Ponies who tried to protect the refugees from each other, including dozens of Guards who had attempted to breech the city-block to evacuate civilians and scores more Ponies who had simply found themselves caught between combatants.

At the time, long-distance communication had been rare, expensive and required teams of unicorns and specially prepared crystals that had been magically linked to send a single message. And even then, the number of Scrying Orbs had been limited, and the need for ponies to write down the actual messages and disseminate them had been a critically flawed step in the system. By the time the Royal Guard had heard that the situation had gone from mere fisticuffs to an actual running battle in the streets, the two groups of refugees had reduced each other’s number to a dozen each out of two hundred members.

And the survivors had acted surprised when the Royal Guard captured them and charged them with acts of murder. The tribal nature of the Gryphons taught them that murder only applied to Gryphons of their own Tribes, not those of other Tribes, or other Races.

Anything that was not of the Tribe was either a Slave, if it was another Gryphon, or meat, if it was not. And that over-weening arrogance so ingrained into the Gryphon race, almost instinctive arrogance, meant that they had refused to accept that the slaughter had been wrong, thus they had been kept in prison until their dying days.

There was a reason that few Gryphons lived in Equestria, and many Ponies, often called the ‘second best friends’ when the Races spoke of the penchant of Pony-kind to offer help and friendship at the first meeting, held Gryphons at arm’s length. Celestia made it a point to ensure that the Feather War of Manehattan was taught to Ponies as soon as they entered their schooling years, as a way to reinforce that violence was wrong, to hammer home that discrimination caused nothing but grief.

And yet once upon a time, the three Pony Tribes were no better. It took several hundreds years to get the hold-outs and supremacists to accept that all three Tribes were equal, but it happened in the end. Celestia sighed as she powered through a buffet-tray of cheese-and-tomato sandwiches and a giant tankard of cider, the privacy of her rooms allowing her to just eat and not worry about delicacy and her public image. Damn you, Asha’Ramahn. If not for your insanity and hatred, the Gryphons might have some stability in their lives. Instead, over a thousand years later your bigotry and contempt for all others poisons your children still and causes suffering where there need not be any at all!

Celestia’s attention turned back to the bush, trying to push the thoughts of war away as she stared hard at the plant, smiling to herself.

How often had she, as a Foal, hidden inside those bushes, trusting in the foul smelling sap in the leaves and branches to protect herself as she hid from the Herd Masters and their troops, and keeping herself alive on the berries when she could not steal food from the ramshackle villages?

They were sad memories, but happy ones too. The few members of the Herds who had not driven her away, who had not believed the Herd-Masters’ claims of her ‘deformities’, that having both wings and horns did not mean she was a bringer of bad-luck and calamity, had offered her shelter when they could risk it and advanced warning of the War-Bands approach when they could not, but more often than not, Celestia would have curled up in the safety of a cluster of these bushes, safe and warm under their thick foliage on a bed of soft leaf-litter.

If any of the Herds, no, the Gypsies had survived, Celestia felt she had to find them and bring them back across the Badlands, to settle them amongst the other Ponies and let them share the bounty and safety that she and so many others had sacrificed so much to create.

Luna had been born of the Thestrals, and was thus the Goddess of the Bat-Ponies. Cadence had been born a Pegasus, and while she had manifested a horn, and then undergone the transformation into an Alicorn after her third birthday, thus she was considered the Goddess of the Pegasi.

Twilight, although she didn’t know it, was the paragon of everything good about the Unicorns, and when she matured fully, would be the Goddess of the Unicorns.

Which only leaves an Earth Pony to fill the role of Goddess of the Earth Ponies. Celestia mused, swallowing a sandwich whole, barely tasting it. I became the leader of the Three Pony Tribes simply because my own kind were all dead, or so I thought. What will this mean for Equestria, to have all five breeds of Pony together? Does Cadence have dominion over the Breezies, or do they have a Princess of their own? I know the Sea-Ponies exiled their own Princess to the Blackwater Trench for her excesses and cruelty, but the Unspoken One was the only Immortal who knew the full truth of the Princess Prophecies.

What happens to me when all the Princesses of the Three Pony Tribes are manifest? The Solar Princess found herself imagining a Court containing five Princesses. Would it be able to hold up under the strain, or would there even be any strain, if the five of them could work together like Twilight, Luna and herself did.

Would she be allowed to spend time with the surviving Gypsy Ponies with four other Princesses to share the burden of leadership? Time to reacquaint herself with her people, to help smooth their entry into Equestrian society? Or would she be doomed to the role of Elder Princess, forever held at bay on a pedestal by the Ponies around her.

First things first. Celestia reminded herself as a Guard knocked on the door, reminding her that Court would return shortly, and her ‘duties’ would have to be resumed. Solve the issues with Gryphonia, get Luna and Twilight back home, and then I can to try organise an expedition across the Badlands to find the … no, to find my people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“D’you mind if Rainbow crashes here, Spike?” Applejack asked, dragging the limp, blank-eyed Pegasus in through the front door, Rarity following in her wake with a shopping bag full of ice-cream and gems. “She’s … uh … had a bit of a shock.”

“Uh, sure, but why not take her home to your farm?” The baby Dragon asked after a few seconds, carefully putting his Power Ponies comic down to help the farm-Pony put the Pegasus onto one of the library’s reading couches. “Is Twilight okay?”

“Ah, Twilight’s just dandy. Threw us fer a loop with … uh … something she’s learned ‘bout herself, is all. Dashie here took it kinda hard.”

“That’s putting it mildly.” Rarity said dryly, dropping the bag onto the floor and collapsing dramatically onto another of the reading couches, earning a snort of amusement from Applejack. “Oh don’t be like that! I’m not used to such rigors, my talents lie in more refined arts!”

“Ah wasn’t aware walkin’ was ‘unrefined’.” Applejack gave the white-coated Unicorn a dirty look before turning her attentions to the limp form of Rainbow Dash, whom Spike was covering up with a lap-blanket. “Uh, jus’ beware Spike, she’s kinda had a hard day. If she starts sayin’ things, jus’ bear with it … don’t repeat it to anypony.”

“Uh … huh. Right, whatever. Can’t be any weirder than the time Twilight talking about a 100-step plan to fix everything in Equestria in her sleep after binging on banana sundaes.”

There was a moment of silence as Rarity and Applejack tried to wrap their heads around that sentence and decided that they’d rather not think too hard about what deviant dreams their bookish friend had.

“Okay, so, uhm … I actually need your help too.” Spike added, tapping his claws together nervously. “I … uhm … got a letter from Velvet, Twilight’s mom. Apparently Trixie and somepony called Sunset used an older copy of Twilight’s translated Neighponese Spells, the ones that were supposed to be destroyed because the spells were flawed?”

“Ah remember those dang things. Took me a week fer mah eyes to go right, turned mah peepers as big as watermelons.” Applejack shuddered, remember that horrible, horrible time. “But ah wonder how one of them scrolls survived? Twilight went all fire an’ brimstone on them, first time ah’ve ever seen Twi burnin’ a book.”.

“At least all you needed was some eye-drops every few hours.” Rarity sniffed, running a hoof through her mane nervously. "My poor mane and tail turned a horrid shade of yellow, and stuck out everywhere in spikes! It was just terrible!”

“Yeah, the problem is that Velvet sent them here … and neither one of them has more than a hoof-ful of bits to their names. They’re going to be crashing in the library until Twilight can fix the spell … but Velvet forgot to mention that Twilight is off on a camping-trip with Luna.” The baby Dragon explained, trying to draw the pair of Ponies back on topic. “Twilight said that Trixie’s a lot better than she was when she got possessed by the Alicorn Amulet, but it’s still Trixie, and a lot of Ponies are gonna be upset with her still. So when the train pulls into Ponyville tomorrow morning, it’s gonna be … fun.”

“Fiiiiiine. Ah getcha, Spike, you need us an’ our friends to ask the other Ponies of Ponyville to give Trixie the Loud an’ Obnoxious a chance, right?”

“Sunset … Sunset … I swore I’ve heard Twilight mention that name somewhere …” Rarity muttered, tapping a hoof against her chin in thought. “For the life of me, I know I’ve heard that name. Perhaps it’s merely the late hour …”

“Rarity, sugar-cube, it’s only sunset …” Applejack pointed out.

“Well, yes, but I had a late night the night before, I had to push several pieces through before going on our little trip into the Everfree, Appljack dear.” The Unicorn explained. “And of course, Sweetie-Belle-proofing my shop so she couldn’t try to … help … again.”

“Okay, ah’ll give you that last one. Look, Spike, I’ve plumb got a load of work to catch up tomorrow, but you jus’ send Rainbow Dash over when she wakes up, let me an’ the others know when Trixie an’ this ‘Sunset’ show up, an’ we’ll do our best to get the towns-ponies to give ‘em a chance.”

“Hey, that’s all anypony can ask for. We’ll get them settled in the library, maybe all they need is Twilight’s updated spell-scrolls to fix themselves, you know, the ones she wrote after figuring out she’d mis-translated several lines?”

Distracted, the two Ponies and baby Dragon missed the signs of Rainbow Dash waking up, probably as much from the loud voices right ontop of her as anything else, before a pair of blue hooves shot out, grabbed Spike by the cheeks mid-sentence and dragged his face down to hers.

“TWILIGHT ISA LESBIAN!” Rainbow Dash shouted, wild-eyed and frantic, before fainting away with a limb draped over her face in a fashion that made Rarity proud, if annoyed that the Pegasus was muscling in on her act.

It was an awkward silence as Spike gingerly re-covered Rainbow Dash with the blanket and all three quietly backed away out of hoof-range in case Rainbow Dash decided on a repeat performance.

“Twilight’s a les-brian?” Spike asked, looking confused and wondering why the other two Ponies suddenly started spluttering. “Is that like a Thespian? Is Twilight gonna put on a show?”

“Oh lawdy, I ain’t touchin’ that one with a ten foot pole.” Applejack muttered, pulling her Stetson hat down over her face to hide her blush.

“Ah … well Spike, do you know Lyra and Bon-Bon?” Rarity offered, trying her best to not burst into hysterical giggles as her mind rebelled against common sense, conjuring up an image of Twilight and Luna in a theatre, performing a song and dance routine about how they became lesbians together to the thunderous applause of the Canterlot Elite.

“Oh, you mean Twilight’s kissing other Mares now? Well, that’s okay. At least she’s finally kissing something, other than Celestia’s ass.” Spike replied without pause, causing the two Mares to shoot each other nervous looks.

She might not be kissing Celestia’s ‘ass’, but you have no idea what she’s getting up to with Luna’s!

“Ah, no, well, Spike y’see, when two Ponies love each other, sometimes they … uhm … do things to each other. Things a … well let’s leave it at that, you’re a mite too young to be told these things …” Applejack stammered, refusing to meet the baby Dragon’s gaze.

“Okay, now you’re sounding just like Twilight when I asked why Mrs Cake likes carrying Mr Cake around on her back so much that she had to keep saying “Yes!” real enthusiastically over and over again.”

Ashen-faced and feeling a roiling ball of coldness in the pit of her stomach, Applejack turned to Rarity, hoping her friend would have something, some technique or knowledge of how to deflect the conversation to less dangerous, and horrifying, directions when she saw the white Unicorn making a mad dash for the front door.

“Well it’s been nice seeing you and everything Spike but Ireallyhavetobegoinghomenowbye!” Rarity half-yelled, half-laughed as she disappeared out the doorway so fast she was just a blur of purple and white.

“Rarity, you bitch!” Applejack shouted at the retreating flash of colour as a determined young Dragon grabbed her by the tail and demanded to know what was so wrong about piggy-back rides as the Farm-Mare took off after her ‘friend’, leaving the comatose Rainbow Dash alone in the library.

Chapter 12 (Clop light)

CHAPTER 12

Twilight is a lesbian. Our Twilight is a lesbian. Rainbow Dash screamed internally in frustration.

On one hoof, she was elated that her friend had finally come out of the closet, partly because Rainbow felt she’d be happier, partly because now Pinkie owed her a hundred bits.

On the other hoof, she was mortified because it wasn’t her who had broken Twilight out of her shell … or dragged her into the closet for some desperately needed sexing. Either phrase worked. Rainbow swore all Twilight needed to stop being a neurotic wreck was a daily orgasm or five.

Twilight had been a virgin. A virgin. Rainbow was enough of a narcissist to understand that she would have enjoyed immensely being the benchmark by which Twilight measured every other lover in her life, and had come to accept that she was a big enough softie that having an actual, honest-to-Faust steady Mare-friend would be better for her than the array of ‘friends-with-benefits’ she had in Cloudsdale and Ponyville.

And if she was going to have a Mare-friend, it had to be somebody awesome. Rarity was just not even in the running, Pinkie Pie would be exhausting to live with, Applejack had clearly stated that her farm came before everything and Fluttershy was blatantly set on Big Mac.

Which had left either Rainbow Dash’s friends-with-benefits, most of whom just wanted to keep on being just that and nothing more, or Twilight Sparkle. The incredulity of spending her life with a bookworm, even an adventurous crazy bookworm with more magic than any Unicorn Rainbow had ever met had made it difficult for Pegasus to take asking Twilight out seriously, but now …

About halfway back, the muttering between Rarity and Applejack had finally congealed in Rainbow’s brain, all the comments and awkward moments coming together, painting her a very blunt picture of what had happened.

Twilight had not only had her cherry popped by another Mare while within Rainbow’s ‘territory’, so to speak, but it had been Luna, the Goddess of the Night, who had done it.

How am I supposed to compete with that? She’s the Goddess of the Night, fer Faust’s sake! All those old books Twilight was reading after Nightmare Night said Luna was also worshipped as the Goddess of Fertility and Sex, back before she went nuts and turned into Nightmare Moon. Scrunching up underneath the blanket, Rainbow bit her bottom lip in thought as she tried to work her way through her thoughts. So, Twilight, who I really wouldn’t have objected to waking up next to, is now so far out of my league that I’m never going to have a chance to tell her I was looking for something less flashy and more permanent unless ... okay, how do I get her back? Nothing’s impossible, I’m Rainbow Danger Dash, Wonderbolt Second Class, Bearer of the Element of Loyalty and the only Pony to perform the Sonic Rainbow in the last thousand years.

Okay, so I’m cute as all hell, not an ounce of fat where it’s not needed, perky, flexible … Luna’s a Goddess who is physically perfect … buck.

Alright, I’m famous, got several product-placement contracts so I’m loaded, I’ve got a swanky pad above Ponyville that’s a literal mansion … Luna’s a Princess of an entire nation who lives in Canterlot Castle with her own division of the Royal Guard at her beck and call … buck!

For the first time since the Young Fliers competition in Cloudsdale a two years ago, Rainbow Dash found herself crushed under doubt. Every time she tried to think of an area where she could compete with Luna, she came up short against the Princess, or what she thought she knew of the Princess.

But if there was one thing in Equestria that could motivate Rainbow Dash, it was a competition ...

So all I’ve got is speed, and I’ve known Twilight longer than Moonbutt the Moody. Rainbow sighed, gnawing on a hoof in frustration as her guts tied themselves in knots at her nervousness and self-doubt. So the only way to win this, to get Twilight back and get everything back to normal, is to rely upon those two things.

A plan slowly came together in Rainbow’s mind as she lay under the blanket, making the Pegasus smile ferociously as she considered how best to use her loyalty to Twilight to fight Luna for the purple Princess’s heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“We are seriously doing this again?” The dusky-blue Alicorn asked, eyebrows raised as she watched Twilight add more runes and lines to the magic circle.

Already taking up the bulk of the floor-space in the tent, Luna’s eyes swum as she tried to follow all the inter-connected circles, runes and various spell-work, but found her eyes watering from the strain. Whatever Twilight was doing, at least, there was a plethora of minor spells that seemed to be devoted to either grounding loose arcane magic into the earth or some sort of transmutation spell, but the runes were different than the ones she knew, belonging to younger, more complex schools of magic that had been developed during her banishment.

“Well we … uhm … blew off a lot of steam last night, and this morning, so it should be okay … right?” Twilight offered, grinning sheepishly. “If your spell to control your estrus is really being eroded by the Sympathy, then we need to … uhm … master how it affects us before your spell fails completely. And practice makes … perfect?”

“I would believe you more if your tail wasn’t waving like a flag, Twilight.” Luna replied tartly, but grinned afterwards to take the accusation out of her words.

“No no no no, I’m not a p-p--pe-pe-per-pervert! I just want this to … work!” Blushing, Twilight did a poor imitation of Fluttershy by trying to hide her face behind her mane, which failed utterly given how short she kept it cut.

“By trying the very same method that had us rubbing each other silly?” Luna teased, chuckling as Twilight’s spluttering rebuttals increased at the same tempo as the waving of her tail.

Finally getting that Luna was only teasing her, Twilight finally managed to get a hold of herself and replied, forcing her tail back down through sheer force of will. “No, no, not the same method. We’ll be lying apart, on opposite sides of Empathy’s Core, with only the points of our horns touching over the crystal.”

“And this will work becaaaaaause ….?” Looking at the chalk-circle, Luna tried to grasp the nature of the runes involved, but whatever magic Twilight would be invoking, it was obviously of a school developed while Luna had been imprisoned in Nightmare Moon and caged on the moon.

“If we are not in full contact with each other, we should be able to hold onto our self-control for longer.” Twilight explained, feeling much better with the conversation switching to safer, less sex-prone topics. “Also, with the magic meeting directly over the Core, it should be immediately funnelled into the crystal.”

“And the magic circle around Empathy’s Core?” Luna asked.

“Insurance. I don’t think Starswirl ever intended for this device to ever handle the power of two Alicorns. Even drained as we are, we’re still fundamentally more powerful than the average Unicorn, and we are drawing magic from the world faster and in greater quantities than any Unicorn could.” Twilight pointed to the several larger runes which had been surrounded in turn by concentric circles of their own, each filled with small, almost illegible runes again. “The magic circle should suck up any magic that escapes the Core and funnel it down into the ground, rather than letting it run wild through the Everfree Forest.”

“Aaaah, so it’s a grounding circle. I was confused, most runes in a magic circle are normally used to funnel magical energy into specific vessels, not just the ground.”

“Oh, you mean Square Root’s hypotenuse theorem? Yes, normally they do, but I’ve linked them to a triple-strength mana-diffusion spell, see, right there? Each circle is its own diffusion spell, linked together to allow them to shunt excess mana from each other into each circle’s transmutation runes, and rune is surrounded by its own miniature circle to draw in as much of the diffused mana as it can?” Twilight pointed to the specific runes that had drawn Luna’s attention earlier.

“….. Those are separate magic circles? How in Equestria did you manage to keep them accurate when the runes are so small?”

“Practice. At the rate Spike goes through gems, I started practicing on transmuting stone and dirt into gems, and found that the smaller the transmutation spell is inscribed, the greater the heat and force it can generate, within reason to the surface it’s inscribed upon.” Puffing out her chest in pride, Twilight expounded upon the magic-circles, obviously proud of her work. “I’ve only learned how to create diamonds, and coal by accident when I misaligned the transmutation spell one time.”

“Are you telling me you learned how to make diamonds? Twilight, that’s one of the hardest and most expensive materials in Equestria, and you figured out how to make it with just a simple spell?” Dropping her head to stare at the magic circles, and the transmutation spells inside them, Luna’s head hurt as she imagined the logistics of such spell-casting would require, let alone the fine control of the levitation spell required to make the circles so small and yet still functional.

“Well … yes. I’ve been practicing on making other types of gems, but right now all I’m able to make is diamonds. And coal.” Twilight coughed, feeling suddenly self-conscious about her work. What if Luna finds a flaw? I’m going to look like an idiot after patting myself on the back like that!

“Oh my Faust, you’re going to annihilate our economy if this gets out ….” Luna muttered, lifting her head back up and giving Twilight a nervous smile. “Uh … how do you pay your bills again?”

“Yeah, Celestia was quite concerned about that, so she made me Pinkie-Promise to never over-use the spell or allow any other Pony to see the formulae for the spell-work.” Shaking her head rapidly, Twilight attempted to explain the situation without digging herself a deeper hole. “I get a cheque each month from Ponyville as a civil servant for my work in the library, and a small stipend from Princess Celestia as her personal student for supplies for my experiments and research materials.”

“Well, that’s a small blessing. So, what will happen to the ground when~” Luna began, before Twilight interrupted her.

“IF! IF! We shouldn’t have a problem this time!”

“~IF, then, if the energy overflows and the magic circle does what it’s supposed to?” Luna finished, rolling her eyes but smiling at Twilight’s faith in her spellwork.

“Uh … it should turn the ground under our tent into solid coal.” Twilight answered after a minute of awkward silence, blushing and dropping her face into her hooves when Luna burst into laughter.

“…Oh dear.” Luna managed to squeak out after her giggle-fit finally released her.

“Look, it was either coal or diamond, that’s the only two types of transmutation I know off the top of my head without my books nearby.” Grumbled the purple Alicorn, before giving Luna a playful raspberry when the Lunar Princess descended into another fit of giggles.

“Well, we need the practice to control our Sympathy, and I’m sure Ponyville wouldn’t say no to a large deposit of coal for free when winter comes ‘round.” Luna offered, when Twilight began to pout.

“Right, okay, so we’re … good?” Twilight asked as another awkward silence began to build.

“I trust that you have done everything you can think of to make this safe.” Luna replied, reaching a hoof over Empathy’s Core to rub Twilight’s shoulder in a reassuring manner. “And to be honest, Twilight, my knowledge of this artefact is no greater than yours. We lose nothing by trying.”

“Uhm, if we have a repeat of last night, I … ah …”

“Twilight.” Luna began, only for a stammering, rapidly reddening Twilight kept on babbling, overcome with nervousness again.

“I just want you to know that I didn’t mean to … wait, no I do want to, but not without your permission, but I … ah, what I mean to say is ...”

“Twilight!” She said again, louder, to no effect on the stammering purple Princess.

“I just don’t want you to think that I am a per-fffmph!”

“Mmmmm ….” Luna lunged forwards, sealing Twilight’s lips with her own, the younger Alicorn blinking rapidly at the ‘attack’ before giving a happy, muffled moan and leaning into the kiss.

After separating, Luna shook her head and gave a quick, mischevious grin to her lover. “Twilight, you are indeed a pervert, for which I am very grateful. Eleven hundred years with not a single lover, and when I return to Equestria, I find myself in your very eager hooves.”

“Eleven hundred years …” Twilight whispered, eyes big as saucers as she thought about that. “Wow, so you must have been, uhm …”

“I had quite the backlog of frustrations, yes. Hence why I am nervous about this ‘test’. As fun as last night was, Twilight, I have over a thousand years of ‘itch’ to scratch.” Luna explained, feeling her cheeks burn with embarrassment, and guilt that Twilight had been deflowered so crudely.

“Oh, so I didn’t really … you just responded so well …” Twilight mumbled, looking crushed.

“Twilight, neither of us is exactly an expert at pleasuring other Mares. And considering why we’re out here, I’m fairly certain you knew exactly how good you were making me feel!” Luna replied swiftly, blushing furious crimson as her mind caught up with the words coming out of her mouth just in time to cringe.

Her cringe turned into a wordless squeak of protest as Twilight’s tail began flailing back and forth excitedly, even as the purple Alicorn’s hooves came up to her face to hide her blush … and a grin.

“Just … just … let’s just get this started, dammit.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Spike?” Applejack asked as the trio sat in one of Ponyville’s few restaurants, having claimed one of the smaller, more private booths at the back of the building, herself and Rarity on their second bottle of wine, the baby Dragon on his fifth banana sundae.

“Yeah, Applejack?” Spike replied, shovelling the ice-cream down his throat at almost the same speed Rarity was guzzling her wine.

“Yah knew what the birds an’ the bees meant already, didn’t yah?” Applejack’s statement drew a spit-take from Rarity.

“Yup.” The Dragon said, barely slowing his gorging on ice-cream to speak. “Twilight made me sit down for a two-hour presentation when she had her first period and told me all about Pony reproduction.”

Applejack just stared at the Dragon with her mouth half-open, while Rarity’s mouth moved silently, mouthing the words ‘period’ ‘spike’ and ‘presentation’.

“Yeah, she even made a slide-show. So yes, I know, in excruciatingly horrific detail, what Twilight is getting up to.”

There was a moment of silence, broken only by the steady slurping of Spike as he powered through his ice-cream treat, before Rarity finally managed to find the strength to speak.

“S-so Spikey-wikey, why on earth did you make Applejack and I believe you didn’t know about … things? We ran through half of the town before Applejack thought to bribe you into silence with ice-cream!” The white Unicorn hissed angrily, although she was looking particularly green in the face, probably from the thought of what the local gossip-mill would make of her being chased through town by a furious Applejack calling her a bitch and demanding she come back and show some responsibility, with Spike clinging to Applejack’s tail and loudly demanding to know what a ‘lesbian’ was.

“An’ ya’ll are tellin’ me that Twilight told yah ‘bout dem lesbians when ya’ll was jus’ a lil’ …” Applejack added, looking decidedly green herself.

“What? No, of course not, I just got an in-depth lecture about how Ponies fell pregnant.” Spike explained.

“That’s … that’s better, I think.”

“Twilight’s mom, Twilight Velvet, told me all about Filly-Foolers, Colt-Cuddlers and inter-species romance shortly after that.”

Once again, the table was gripped with silence as two now-very green-looking Mares gave each other startled looks.

“Wh-wha-wha-whaaaaat? Buh … dat don’t … why …” Applejack stammered, apparently unable to fully process what she’d heard.

“Why would Mrs Velvet do that, Spike?” Rarity spluttered, suddenly wishing she hadn’t had all that wine to calm her nerves.

“Well, I was a little confused from Twilight’s lecture at the time, and Twilight’s mother writes the ‘Hoof Wetter’ series, so I thought if anyone could explain what she was on about, it would be Velvet.”

“Wait! Wait!” Rarity demanded, slapping a hoof onto the table. “Are you telling me Twilight is the daughter of one of the most infamous erotic authors in living memory? You got your ‘birds and bees’ advice from the author of a series so infamous for their graphic detail of inter-species coitus and pan-sexual characters that they have to be printed in Neighpon because nopony in Equestria will dare to admit they are involved in the production process?”

“Huh?” Applejack and Spike said together, giving Rarity a puzzled look.

“I think I need more wine …” The Unicorn mumbled to herself, skipping the glass and going straight for the bottle.

“ ‘Scuse me, can ah have some cider, black label, in the biggest mug ya’ll have got, please. This is gonna be one of them nights.” Waving a waiter down for her order, the Farm-Pony turned her attention back to Spike. “An yah didn’t answer the question. Why did yah put me an’ Rares through all that if yah already knew ‘bout all this?”

“Because you all left me behind.” Spike snapped after a few moments of silent, sullenly staring at his empty bowl of ice-cream before starting to hiccup, eyes squeezing shut as he tried to not cry. “I haven’t seen Twilight in almost a month, and you guys ditch me after bullying the secret out of me, and you didn’t take me w-with you to see my big si-sister.”

“Oh Spikey …” Rarity sighed and scooted along the curving bench to wrap her front-legs around Spike and pull the baby Dragon into a hug, sighing as she felt his short, stubby arms grip tightly onto her barrel. “We keep forgetting, you’re so mature for your age, but you’re still a baby Dragon.”

When the waiter came back, carrying a massive pewter mug, he found the two Mares holding a sobbing baby Dragon between. Unwilling to risk a scene, or aggravating the situation further, especially when it involved two of the Elements of Harmony, infamous for the sheer amount of weirdness that followed in their wake, he quietly placed the tankard down and bolted for the next table, leaving the trio to their group hug.

No tip is worth getting caught up in their catastrophies! The waiter thought, shuddering at the image of being dragged along on one of the infamous ‘Friendship Quests’, as he took the orders of a cross-eyed Pegasus and her brown-coated Earth-Pony boyfriend.

“Tell yah what, Spike, next time we go to visit, ya’ll come with us. I’m sure Twilight’ll be delighted to spend time with you ‘gain, an’ Luna will want to get all the details on Twilight from yah.” Applejack offered, feeling more than a touch of guilt. They’d just up and gone after Twilight without even bothering to ask in Spike had wanted to come, and he was Twilight’s brother, in every way that counted. And for an Apple-family Pony, the thought of family being hurt cut deep.

But still, a part of her wondered just how well Spike would adapt to having to share his ‘big sister’ with somepony who might very well become the new center of her world.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Honey …”

“One more time, Shiney, please?”

“Honey, it was five times yesterday, and three times today. No. You were barely able to walk yesterday, Faust only knows if you’re going to be able to even move in the morning if we keep going.” Shining Armor replied firmly, trying his best to ignore his wife’s cutely-pouting face, or the way her wing-tip was lightly trailing up and down his chest.

Normally, Celestia would have immediately responded to anything that might have threatened her ‘niece’ with a battalion of Royal Guards armed to the teeth and ready for war, with a score of the best and brightest of the Royal Mage Corps standing by to teleport Cadence to safety, but the reply had only arrived the next morning with a simple flash of Dragon’s Fire from Cadence’s horn, like any other letter.

To Shining Armor and Cadence Armor

Let me say first that it is good to hear from you two again.

In regards to the ‘issue’ with Cadence’s spasms, all I can say is that it will get worse before it gets better, but rest assured that Luna and Twilight are hard at work on the issue. I recommend confining Cadence to light work in your private chambers, as we have no idea when the next Sympathy-wave will arise.

I think Twilight will have something rather surprising to tell you upon your next visit to Canterlot.

P.S I am delighted to hear that you and Cadence have plans for foals in your future. I cannot wait to have grand-children causing mayhem in Canterlot Castle again. Work hard.

P.P.S. enclosed in this package are some potions you may require should your … stamina start to wane. The Royal Consorts used them regularly, and I can personally attest to the effectiveness. Take them sparingly, at most half a vial a day. Any more and I fear neither you nor Cadence will get anything productive done for a day or two. Except perhaps the work on my Grandchildren.

On second thought, take a whole vial every day. And give Cadence the pills, they will help her be more receptive to your seed.

With love, your Commander-in-Chief, Mother-in-Law and soon-to-be Grandmother (again), Celestia.

Not exactly the most helpful advice she’s ever given me. Shining thought wryly, trying to ignore his wife’s pleading as her wing-tip started stroking his face.

“Cadence, no, you are going to be in no fit state for Court tomorrow if we try any harder tonight, and the Crystal Ponies are already antsy over your ‘Love-Love Wave’ attack.”

Cadence couldn’t help herself and held a hoof to her mouth, bursting into giggles.

“Shining, really? ‘Love-Love Waves’ ? Oh my Faust, and they actually believed that?” The pink Alicorn, Princess of Love, squeaked out between fits of giggles as her husband and ‘Royal Consort’ gave her a sour-faced look. “That’s like something out of the girls-comics Twily and I used to read when I was her Foal-sitter.”

Cadence’s chuckling died off as she looked up at her husband’s face and saw his turning faintly pink around the cheeks.

“Shining … you didn’t make that up on the spot, did you?” Cadence asked, a grin spreading across her face. “By Celestia’s Beard, you actually read the comics? Twily’s comics?”

“I … wanted to know what was so important that you had to spend time with my kid sister, rather than me.” Shining finally managed to grate out, stoically ignoring the uncontrolled giggling coming from his blushing bride.

“Oh … oh … oh my ribs …” Cadence wheezed as she came down from her giggle-fit. “I think I still have a Sailor Moon-Mare costume in storage, if that’s what will put some corn in your dog …”

“Ugh, Cadence, that was a horrible … although the costume does sound I mean no! Any more and neither of us is going to be able to move out of the bed in the morning.” Shining said firmly, dropping onto the bed next to Cadence, lying on his belly and firmly telling a battered, bruised but defiantly turgid part of his anatomy no as images of Cadence in a Sailor Fuku outfit two sizes too small, with its thigh-high socks and frilled miniskirt and giant bows all flashed through his mind.

“Party pooper!” Cadence booed, but accepted that the limit had been reached for the night and settled instead for a snuggle with Shining on the one dry part of the bed left, draping her wing over his back. “But I’m getting that outfit out of storage. And I’m sure I can get somebody to make a Tuxedo Mask outfit for you.”

“Do I get to say no to that?” Shining asked softly, nuzzling his wife’s muzzle as he used his magic to slowly snuff out the candles that were lighting the room.

“If you ever want to see another corn-dog in the Crystal Empire, you’ll say yes.” Cadence whispered in his ear, then giggled and kissed him on the forehead as he grumbled about tyrant Princesses as the last candle flickered and died out, leaving only Luna’s moon as the sole source of light as the two lovers drifted off to sleep together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna had experienced many things in her life, pleasant and otherwise, but few were as agonizing as lying still with her loins painfully demanding fulfillment for over an hour, her lover literally within reach on the opposite side of a small, pumpkin-sized cube of pink quartz, horn-tips lost in a swirling ball of white, purple and midnight blue magic as the sole physical connection between them.

Twilight, for her part, was barely holding onto her self-control, twitching and groaning loudly, but still possessed of enough will to hold her head still even as her hind-quarters twitched and squirmed.

The Sympathy was not quite as overwhelming as it had been before, but Luna could feel her Heat, a slow churning need, older than Ponykind, bubbling away in her lower body, matched in temperament, if not intensity, inside Twilight’s.

And Twilight’s theory that Luna’s repressed Heat, her estrus, was interfering with the Sympathy, even as the Sympathy in turn eroded the ancient spells Luna had used to repress her biological urges had been proven true, at least to a certain extent, but what worried Luna was that the Sympathy also seemed to be tricking Twilight’s body go into early estrus, so now instead of one Mare in need of a Stallion and a friend nearby to help her, there were now two Mares about to go into hormonal state that would sap at their common sense and inhibitions, in the middle of one of the most dangerous parts of Pony territory.

“I’m su-suh-sorry, Luna!” Twilight half-whispered, half-moaned, her front hooves digging into the blankets of her bedding as her hind legs quivered, both Mares shuddering as Twilight’s ‘empty’ orgasm rippled through them both, courtesy of the Sympathy, a painful orgasm for the force of which it came and the lack of anything within her for the cramping muscles to clamp down on.

Luna’s only reply was a steady breathing through her nose to try and control the pain and a curt nod as she felt her own core twitch and pulse with need for something more than just phantom sensations or eager, if inexperienced, tongues or hooves.

They needed a Stallion, or failing that, a couple of very robust ‘estrus aid’ like the ones Celestia had ordered on the quiet for Luna back when she had first returned to Canterlot, not realising Luna had ‘taken care’ of the matter with a spell of refuting, denying herself the ability to have Foals in exchange for not suffering the pains and frustrations of estrus.

I wonder if now that the spell is failing, I might have foals? Do I risk it? After everything I’ve seen and done, am I the sort of Mare who should be a mother? Luna thought, struggling for something else to focus on other than the panting, lust-rogued face of Twilight just inches from her own, or the heady, sweet scent of mare-musk that filled the air as their tails lashed back and forth over winking treasures. Not that Twilight could give me Foals …

“It’s … fine Twi-iiiii-light.” Luna whined as she felt the twitching that signalled another orgasm, building inside of her body this time. “We didn’t kn-uuuuuuuuh! We didn’t know the Sympathy would ma-aaaahaaa-make us go into estrus togetherrrrrr!”

Unable to bear it any longer, Twilight pulled her horn away from the point of contact, both Mares groaning in relief as the whirling sphere of magic broke apart into tiny motes of purple, blue or white light that were rapidly sucked into the Core, leaving the Alicorns shaking from relief and pain, the softly glowing crystal cube flickering and pulsing with the magic it had absorbed.

They had regained more of their magic, almost restored to half-strength, but the cost …

When Luna shakily got up and staggered around the cube to lay down at Twilight’s side, the younger Princess, sobbed and wrapped a wing around Luna’s barrel, whimpering in misery.

“Oh Twilight, I’m so sorry.” Luna sighed, reciprocating with her own wing and putting her head onto of Twilight’s neck, the best ‘hug’ she could give in this position. “You’re in so much pain because of my foolishness.”

“W-why does it hu-hurt?” Twilight whimpered, shaking against Luna’s side. “S-s-sex is supposed to feel good, so why does it hurt?”

“It’s the estrus, Twilight. Our bodies need something inside them, and with how often we are peaking thanks to the backlash of my denying my estrus for a thousand years, the longer we deny what our bodies need, the harsher the pain will be.” Luna replied, wincing as she felt a spasm ripple through Twilight’s flanks, feeling the painful twitching of Twilight’s muscles where their sides were pressed tightly against one another. “We need to either find a Stallion, or use … toys.”

“I don’t kn-aaaagh-know any Stallions I’d trust with this …” The purple Alicorn muttered, sagging against Luna’s side as her body spasmed one last time. “I’ve never had a … you know.”

“I had thought that the Pegasus, Flash Sentry, had an interest in you?” Luna said after several moments of thinking. We need a robust Stallion, capable of handling two very needy Mares, but they have to be absolutely trust-worthy. This is a potential scandal, after all, and we need somepony who won’t abuse our trust, either now or in the future.

“That jerk.” Twilight replied, hissing with obvious venom. “I thought he might have been a nice Stallion, but all he wanted was a firm plot on speed-dial. And a way to advance himself up the military hierarchy, and as an Element Bearer, new Princess and sister to the previous Captain of the Royal Guard …”

“Ugh, and he seemed so pleasant when I spoke to him.” Luna sighed, using her flexible primaries, her flight feathers, to rub up and down twilight’s back in an attempt to calm the Mare down. “Well, how about that rather … rugged farmer friend of yours? I must admit, he looks rather delightful …”

It was a relief after the hours of torture the two had put themselves through to see Twilight grin cheekily, blushing heavily.

“Big Macintosh? Oh, uhm, well I don’t think I’d mind …” Twilight stammered, her face turning pink, and Luna couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Twilight if you could say no to that, I would wonder just how high you’d set your expectations in a Stallion.” The Lunar Princess teased.

“No, it’s not that, but Fluttershy, she’s kinda, well, she’s got a huge crush on Big Mac. Like, a huuuuuuge crush. Melts into a puddle when she doesn’t think anyone is watching her while she’s looking at him-level crush.” Twilight explained, still pink-faced. “And he’s also Applejack’s big brother … much as I wanted to go up and ask him out, I felt I’d be betraying my friends if I did.”

“Well if you’re not game, I might be. Just look at that flank, Twilight.” Luna whispered, leaning in close and blowing into Twilight’s ear, making the younger Alicorn giggle at the sensation and the topic. “You could bounce cannon-balls off it. Imagine him coming home for dinner, all sweaty and ruffled, and there’s you, in a cute little apron, waiting for him at the door, asking if he’d like to help you, ahem, stuff the turkey …”

“Oh my gaaaaawsh.” Twilight squee’d, putting both hooves to her face as her blush turned from a light pink into a neon glow-in-the-dark red.

“What about the Wonderbolt, Soarin? I hear he’s liable to do anything for a pie … as a matter of fact, he’s obsessed with Apple Pies right now …”

“I … uh … think Rainbow Dash would murder me with a point-blank Sonic Rainboom if she ever found out.”

“Hmmm, yes, her temper does seem to be rather volatile …” Luna murmured, remembering the look of rage on the blue Pegasus’s face when she had seen Twilight’s wing on Luna’s back. “Uhm … one of the Royal Guard then?”

“Uh … Shining told me all about their locker-room gossip-circles. We’d be outed faster than you can say ‘bragging rights’.”

“Definitely not one of the Night Guard …”

“Why not? Aren’t they loyal to you?”

“Yes … but … Thestrals aren’t exactly normal in that regards. Mating is a … communal affair. And the Stallions have certain … quirks.”

“Wait, you mean they … they make love while others are present?”

“Uh, no. Thestrals don’t have ‘marriages’ like other Ponies, they just mate for a seaon and move on. And it’s more like an orgy than ‘making love’.”

“Oh…. I’m probably going to regret this, but what … ‘quirks’?”

“Well, ah, you know how Stallions have a flare on their end of their … little friends?”

“I have some, ah, books on the subject, yes.”

“Well, Thestral mating is more … chaotic. To stop the Mares escaping mid-coitus, the Stallions developed spurs on the backs of their front hooves to hold the Mares in place, and their …”

“Spurs?” Twilight gasped, looking equal parts amazed and horrified. “And …”

“They have scores of small … spines … on their genitals, to help scrape away the essence of the Stallions who mounted the Mare before them.” Luna explained in a small voice, noting the eye-twitching of the Mare under her wing. “When they ejaculate, the spines spring up and scrape the walls of the passage clear of the Mare’s previous mounts.”

The was an awkward pause as Twilight digested that little bit of information, her eyes going wide as saucers and her pupils shrinking to pin-pricks before the newest Princess finally found her voice again.

“Luna, please don’t take this the wrong way, but thank Faust you are a Princess, not a Prince, because I don’t think I could handle that, Sympathy or not.”

“It’s … not that bad?”

“Nothing with spines on it is going anywhere near that part of my body. I don’t care if Equestria itself depends on it, NOOOOO.”

“Well, then that just leaves us with … toys. I’d ask you, but …”

“Yes, I kind of don’t have any. I mean I have hand-me-down pulp romance novels from Rarity, but that’s about as far as my erotic adventurers had gotten before … we … uhm …”

“Silly filly. Uhm … Celestia brought some for me when I first came back from the Moon, but they’re still in Canterlot, and I don’t think ducking back home for a box full of vibrators will go over well with Celestia.”

“A box? Are we talking a shoe-box? A moving box? Celestia bought you a box of sex toys?”

“A moving box, big enough for you to hide in. Honestly, I have no idea where she got them or why she thought I needed them. Some of the toys in there I have no idea what they are used for. I just threw the box into the back of my biggest closet and threw junk on-top of it until I couldn’t see the back wall anymore, and made the Head Maid promise that nobody would ever clean up the pile.”

“Uh … you know, it’s kind of funny, she has one in her room.” Twilight mumbled softly.

“She has one what?” The Lunar Princess asked sharply, blinking in surprise. Was Twilight possibly suggesting that her straight-laced sister possessed ...

“A sex toy.” Twilight said.

There was a pregnant pause as Twilight found herself under the incredulous glare of the Lunar Princess, whose mouth was working silently.

“You lie. Celestia could barely stand to be anywhere near the box she brought me, and fled when I opened it up to see what this ‘big filly’s present’ was that she’d brought me.”

“I do not. I found it when I was a little filly.”

“Oh, this I have to hear.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many years ago ...

The Filly known as Twilight Sparkle’s eyes danced with wonder as they worked their way across hundreds of books, knick-knacks and relics that sat on the shelves, within glass-faced cabinets and hung off the walls.

Princess Celestia’s room! The little Filly finally gave in to her emotions and ran in a tiny circle on the thick woven carpets imported from Gryphonia, squealing with delight as the Celestial Monarch looked on, smiling as the filly’s reaction to her promised ‘reward’, an entire hour of play-time with Celestia, overwhelmed the little Filly, before the tiny Unicorn bounded over and began firing off questions about anything that caught her eye.

It wasn’t long before Celestia had managed to direct Twilight’s endless questions to a single focus, and the two sat on the thick carpets together, the Princess a picture of a serene teacher, the little Filly all but wriggling with excitement as Celestia read to her from an ancient tome about the adventurers of a Knight in the old days of Equestria, one ‘Gallant George’ whom had driven the wicked and terribly Lyndwyrms from Equestria’s borders, when somepony knocked on the thick mahogany doors of Celestia’s chambers.

Sighing with irritation, Celestia had gotten up to answer the door, speaking with whoever was on the other side before returning to apologise to Twilight, and telling her to practice her levitation magic until Celestia could return from the emergency that needed her attention.

A little unhappy at being left behind, after studying so hard all week, Twilight nonetheless quickly found herself engrossed in juggling several small metal dice from a container on a shelf, marvelling at how the glowing runes on the dices’ surfaces changed constantly …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Wait. Wait, wait just a minute. Are you telling me you, as a little filly, were practicing your levitation abilities with the Dragon-Dice of Destiny?” Luna interrupted, going pale under her dark fur.

“The Dice of the-who-what-now?” Twilight replied, confused and annoyed at being interrupted.

“Nothing, nothing, just … those damnable things caused so much chaos, and Celestia just leaves them lying around for a Filly to meddle with …”

“Well, to be fair, I had to dispel the enchantment on the jar to get them out, but I was used to using small objects like dice for my practice-lessons, so it seemed like a good idea to me at the time.” Twilight pointed out, trying to defend herself as Luna made small choking noises, shaking her head slowly.

“You dispelled one of Celestia’s lock-spells as a Filly. Mother Earth preserve us all. I don’t suppose you saw the runes the Dice showed after you dropped them did you?” The Lunar Princess asked, rubbing a fold of bedding between her fore-hooves, looking and sounding very nervous. “Those Dice were enchanted by a powerful Dragon Mage to foretell the future of the one who rolls them, even changing it if the need is dire enough.”

“I didn’t ‘drop’ them! After I finished my exercises, I wanted to try something bigger, heavier, so I put them back in their container and back on the shelf. They kept rattling in their jar for ages afterwards, so no, I didn’t see what the Dice were trying to show me.” Trying to defend her actions, Twilight once again heard Luna making choking noises, though this time she seemed to be trying to hold back laughter. Convinced she was being teased again, Twilight huffed in annoyance and continued her story.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Books. Scrolls. Paperweights. Spare sets of the Royal Regalia. Pillows.

Twilight had levitated them all, built a grand book-fortress out of them, knocked it down, put the room back in order and was considering if the Princess would be annoyed with her if she took a nap, when she spotted something under the bed.

It was pink, it was longer and thicker than even her father’s legs, and most importantly, it was huge.

Surely Princess Celestia will praise me if I can levitate that! The little Filly thought, excitedly grabbing the flared end with her teeth.

YOU TOUCHED IT WITH YOUR MOUTH?

I was four years old at the time! How many penises did you think I had seen by that age?

I have kissed you on the mouth! A mouth that has touched something that has been intimate with my sister’s ….

It was covered in dust-bunnies, Luna, I don’t think it had seen much use at that time.

Much like my sister’s ~

Can I finish the story or not?

Fine, but the first thing we do tomorrow is get you some mouth-wash.

Really … ahem …

Eyes twinkling with excitement, Twilight Sparkle’s stubby little horn glowed with magic, the little Filly put her all into levitating the strange device, lifting it, at first, a tiny bit off the carpet before her magic failed and it fell back onto thick floor-coverings.

And the more she failed, the more determined the young filly became, that she would levitate this strange toy, she would make Celestia happy, and she would get the remaining time of her reward that she was owed.

Straining, she managed to finally lift the giant tube, more than twice as long as she was and as thick around the middle as she herself was, vertically in the air, her little body trembling with the effort as it slowly rose into the air, the setting sun filtering in through the window behind it making it appear to the young Filly as if she was raising one of the foundation stones of Equestria itself.

Predictably, Twilight’s magic faltered once again, and the giant pink tube fell to the carpet, this time base first, and landed with a loud, ominous click.

Filly Twilight’s eyes opened wide with shock as the giant pink tube began to wriggle like a living thing, waving one way and then the other, it’s flanged head dancing to and fro before it fell towards her, no, on-top of her!

Squealing in alarm, the little filly was squashed under the now-alive toy that wriggled and trashed, battering her tiny muzzle with the soft, pink substance of its mass.

Panicking, Filly Twilight tried to think of some way to save herself, and her mind cast back to Celestia’s story of the brave Knight who had driven the horrid Lyndwyrms, wingless, serpentine Dragons who breathed poison and corruption instead of flame, from Equestria’s borders.

Wasn’t this thing also kinda like a Dragon, having no wings of limbs?

“You’ll not stop me, Lee-wind-worm!” Twilight shouted, wrapping her legs around the leviathan trying to crush her, and sinking her teeth into the flared rim of plastic, hanging on for dear life and trying to crush the ‘Dragon’ as they wriggled and writhed across the carpet, the relentless drmmmmm noise of the ‘Dragon’ matched by Twilight’s panicked demands that it surrender before she bit it again.

It was a battle for the ages, a titanic struggle from which only one combatant could emerge alive, and eventually the dreaded Pink Lyndwyrm succumbed to Twilight’s nibbling on its flanged head, its thrashing and vibrating cry falling silent as a jelly-legged Filly stood atop the jiggling, tooth-marked corpse of her enemy and gave a weary cheer of victory, before falling over onto her side, panting and exhausted and more than ready for that nap.

Staggering back up onto her hooves, Twilight turned around to crawl back onto Celestia’s gloriously soft bed, when she saw the most curious sight.

There, in the doorway, stood Princess Celestia and her mother, both staring at her with incredulous looks on their faces, while her father was lying on the floor, biting one hoof as he shook with silent laughter.

“Mummy! Princess Celestia! Look! I defeated the Lee-wind-worm!” Filly Twilight shouted, puffing out her chest in pride and pointing a shaking hoof to her ‘slain’ foe, which gave one last wiggle of protest before falling silent for the last time.

“Princess Celestia, what exactly are you teaching my daughter again?” Twilight Velvet asked in a voice on the verge of hysterics moments before the Celestial Princess fainted dead away onto the floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“…And that was the last time I was allowed into Princess Celestia’s private rooms without one of the Guards, the Maids or Princess Celestia herself as an escort.” Twilight finished her story.

Much to her disgust, Luna appeared to be mimicking her father, lying curled up in a ball, a hoof shoved into her mouth and her body shaking with repressed laughter.

“I was four!” Twilight all but shouted, which only made Luna spit her hoof out and laugh out loud, tears streaming from her eyes as her hooves and wings pounded at the bedding in time to her laughter.

Finally, Luna stopped laughing just before she risked hyperventilating, lying weakly under her share of the blankets as Twilight pouted and refused Luna’s laughter-weakened limbs trying to draw her into a hug.

“Oh, oh Twilight, that is priceless, simply priceless. I can just imagine the look on her face when she came back and saw you in a life-or-death battle with her dildo.” Luna wheezed, scooting over to snuggle up against her peeved lover, nuzzling Twilight’s puffed-up cheeks.

“Maybe you see it that way, but I was sworn to secrecy, and when I was old enough to understand just what I had done, can you imagine how awkward I felt around Celestia?” Twilight huffed, but relented and put a wing around Luna as the giggling Alicorn wrapped cold legs around Twilight’s barrel. “I mean, what do you say to your teacher after you embarrass her by doing something like that?”

“Twilight, my dear, I assure you that Celestia has nothing but the highest regard for you. I would even go so far as to say that she’d consider you something like a daughter, if her relentless desire to be ‘perfect’ would allow her to do such a thing to another Mare’s foal.” Luna replied, her horn glowing softly as she pulled her blankets over Twilight’s own bedding, protecting them from the ever-present chill of the Everfree Forest’s night.

“I hope so … I … I don’t ever want Princess Celestia to think less of me. She’s everything I aspire to be.” Twilight murmured, her own horn lighting up as she began to slowly extinguish the candles that illuminated the tent, the last candle in-front of the two Alicorns flickering as Twilight lowered her head to snuff the candle, which she felt Luna’s limbs clench around her. “Luna?”

“Twilight, look at our horns!” Luna hissed, her voice full of excitement.

Wondering just what Luna meant, Twilight looked up at her horn and gasped. Her pale purple aura coated her horn, and Luna’s own dusky blue aura shimmered around her own spiralling horn, but even so close together, neither horn sent arcs of uncontrolled magical energy towards the other, even with both of the Alicorns recharged to half-strength.

By accident, the two had managed to solve the first hurdle of the Sympathy.

Chapter 13 (Clop Heavy)

CHAPTER 13

“Another one, Night? You sure you’re gonna be okay getting home?” The bar-keep, a fat, burly steel-grey Earth Pony with a black eye-patch and two ears that looked like they’d been chewed down to nubs asked, the Stallion he was speaking to drinking, who was the sole patron at the bar, with only a few score other Stallions drinking in the booth set around the wood-panelled walls of the small, smoke-filled tavern.

“Yeah, keep ‘em coming, Spud. Velvet’s been struck by a bout of ‘inspiration’ tonight.” Night Light sighed, draining the last dregs of dark ale from his pint-glass. “Don’t suppose I could crash behind the bar tonight?”

“As I see it, Night, I still owe you for covering me arse back at the border. You can have the couch up-stairs, and waffles for breakfast.” ‘Spud’ replied with a laugh, filling a fresh glass with dark ale before sliding it down the bar.

“Damn, you’ll make a fine bride someday if you keep that up, Spuds.” Night Light chuckled as he caught the glass with a hoof.

“Me brides agrees with you.” The burly bar-tender replied with a grin. “Nothing makes me lovelies feel like the princesses they are than breakfast in bed and a bit of pampering at the start of every day.”

“And saves yourself an earful at the end of the day?” Night said, returning the grin.

“Damn straight. If I’ve a choice between another tour of duty along the border or somehow irritating me brides, I’ll take the tour of duty.” The burly bar-tender sighed as he ran a rag around the inside of a pint-glass and put it onto a drying rack. “The Gryphons will only eat me alive. My lovelies would make me suffer for weeks and never tell me what I’d done wrong.”

“May Celestia grant us the wit to understand our loved ones, or failing that, protect us from the great and terrifying mystery that is the minds of the fairer sex.” The dark-blue Unicorn muttered, taking a rather large chug from his glass.

Most of the evening had passed in easy silence or tall tales with the other regulars of the Bronze Leaf tavern, but his own part, Night Light was merely enjoying a night of peace without his adventurous wife driving him up the wall asking questions no sane Stallion would have the answer to, or having some nosy reporter hammering on the door, demanding an interview.

Two of the Royal Guard, from the dozen that Celestia had assigned to watch over Night Light and his wife, had followed him to the tavern, but had refused to ‘let their manes down’ and join him for a drink inside, instead standing stoically outside the building.

Good Stallions. A bit stiff-necked for their age, but good Stallions. Night Light thought as he drained the last of his pint, soaking in the atmosphere of good booze, cigar smoke and softly playing music from the battered jukebox in the corner, before he heard the door-bell tinkle. Odd, the regulars are all here, and it’s almost midnight. Maybe the Guards have finally given in and come in for a pint or three?

The Bronze Leaf wasn’t the most popular tavern, being tucked so far out of the way behind alleyways and old warehouses, it was all but impossible to find without directions, but for the regulars, not having to deal with snobby Nobles ‘slumming it’ or the bass-loving youth coming in looking for a party was well worth navigating the maze of alleys and narrow roads every night.

“There he is.” Somepony said, loudly, behind Night Light. “You lot know what to do.”

“Damn, all of this for one old codger? Is the boss being paranoid or what?”

“Hey, Nickle, do the words ‘shut the buck up’ and ‘right the buck now’ ring any bells?”

“Oi, Night, I thought you had two bodyguards?” Spud asked in a low voice, the burly Stallion’s face twisting into a grimace.

“I do.” Night Light replied, turning on his bar-stool to see just who’d walked in the door, and felt a ripple of annoyance as he saw who had entered. “Or maybe I did.”

Six Stallions, all of them young, fit and hard-eyed, with the bodies of trained soldiers, but wearing un-adorned leather armor, including large haunch-plates that completely obscured their Cutie Marks.

Either mercenaries, or some Noble’s thugs. He though sadly as he looked the Stallions over.

And they were looking for him, apparently.

“Right, you, the blue Unicorn.” One of the leather-armored Unicorns asked loudly over the softly-playing music. “You’re Night Light, aren’t you?”

“I am. And your names, gents?” Night Light asked, not budging an inch off his stool.

“None of your business. You’re going to come with us, right now.”

“I’m happily married, gents, and thus not in the habit of ducking out into the night with strange young Stallions without a damn good reason.” Night Light joked, hoping for a reaction with which to gauge the newcomers’ intent.

Two of the Stallions merely blinked, otherwise stone-faced. The other four immediately snarled or took a step forwards, mouths open to reply angrily, when one the two stone-faced Stallions coughed loudly, and they fell silent.

“Charming. Regardless, you will accompany us, Night Light.” The speaker, a lanky Unicorn with a dull blue coat and grey mane, said slowly, tapping a hoof, an iron-shod hoof at that, on the wooden floor of the tavern. “We’d prefer willingly, but our orders are ‘by any means necessary’.”

“And dare I ask about my two friends outside?” Night Light asked in the silence as the juke-box’ song finished, the ancient machine slowly switching to a new record.

“They’re taking a nap.” One of the ‘angry’ Stallions replied before the stone-faced, grey-maned Stallion could reply, a wicked grin on his face. “Royal Guards, my plot. Apparently Celestia doesn’t think much of your safety, old man, if that’s the level of security she thinks you need.”

“For the love of Faust, Nickle, shut up.” Grey-Mane hissed, kicking his mouthy companion in the side with one of those iron-shot hooves and earning a pained yelp from the mouthy stallion.

“Lads, do you understand the meaning of the Bronze Leaf?” Spud asked loudly, the thick-bodied Earth Pony leaning onto the polished wooden bar and giving the leather-armored ponies an evil grin.

“Nobody gives a toss about what this place is called, mud-pony.” Another of the ‘angry’ Stallions snapped, spitting the insult with obvious venom in his voice.

Oh, you did not just say that! Night Light thought angrily. The scowls on the faces of the rest of the patrons, and the evil smirk on Spud's face, echoed his sentiments.

“Dime for buck’s sake, shut up.” Grey-Mane hissed again, lashing out with a hoof when the other Stallion turned to protest. “Look, enough of this. Night Light, you either do this on your own hooves, or we sling your unconscious arse across one of my associate’s backs here and we carry you out. Which one will you choose?”

“Answer my friend’s question, and I’ll give you a third choice.” Night Light replied calmly, leaning back onto the bar and hooking a hind-leg around thick wooden leg of his stool.

“….Fine, you hick. No, I don’t know, what’s the meaning of the Bronze Leaf?” Grey-Mane asked as his ‘associates’ moved out in a semi-circle around the aging Stallion, completely ignoring the other patrons in the tavern.

“The Bronze Leaf is the medal awarded to Ponies who distinguish themselves above and beyond the call of duty to Equestria.” Night Light explained, a sudden grin crossing his face. “Normally, it’s only given to Ponies within the Royal Guard, but recently, six Mares received it for their help with a few recent events. Princess Luna’s return, the capturing of Discord and the restoration of the Crystal Empire. My daughter, Twilight Sparkle, was one of those Mares. I was so proud to put her medal up on the mantle-piece, alongside my own.”

“Wait … what?” One of the ‘angry’ Stallions whispered, blinking rapidly. “Nobody said anything about tangling with the father of an Element Bearer…”

“Penny, I swear to Faust …” Grey-Mane muttered. “And your point?”

“Do you know how I got my Bronze Leaf?” Night Light continued, that same grin on his face. “Surely your employer didn’t send you out here with any information one besides my appearance?”

“Oi, Night, mind the windows this time.” Spud muttered, taking a step away from the Unicorn.

“No, but I’m sure you’re about to tell us.” Grey-Mane snapped, looking bored, when there was a sharp crack noise, and the ‘associate’ nearest to him flipped backwards, landing hard on his back on the wooden floorboards.

The air in the Tavern was still for all of five seconds before the leather-clad Stallions started panicking, two of them rushing to their friend and checking for a pulse, the other three staring open-mouthed at Night Light, who appeared to have done nothing at all.

No aura of magic around his horn, no weapon in his hoof, just a smug Stallion, past his prime, with a half-empty empty pint-glass next to him, the ice inside it clinking together.

“Dime, Nickle, what in Tartarus happened to Pound?” Grey-Mane hissed, his eyes twitching from his fallen associate to the smugly grinning Night Light.

“Dunno! He’s out cold … got a lump on his head the size of a walnut!” One of the Stallions muttered.

“Alright, you do that again and I FAUST DAMN IT!” Grey-Mane started to threaten, before flinching away as the air was split by another crack, and the Stallion next to him spun sideways in a circle like he’d taken a hoof to the face, before collapsing in a boneless pile.

“Bet you’re wishing your employer had given you some more information, eh?” Night Light said loudly, grinning still as the other Patrons started chuckling, a soft current of mocking humor towards the leather-armored Stallions in their midst. “Allow me to enlighten you, gents. Night Light, formerly of the 205th Equestrian Ranger Corps, Captain of the sniper-unit, bearer of a Bronze Leaf for my efforts during the last border-skirmish with the Gryphons. I’m also a Black-belt in the ‘Silent Horn’ school.”

Tapping a hoof against his horn, Night Light levitated his pint-glass under the dispenser and poured himself another round, while his horn remained completely and utterly devoid of the normal tell-tale magical aura.

Point his hoof towards the grinning, one-eyed Earth Pony behind the bar, Night Light continued. “Introducing my former C.O., Major Red Norland, aka ‘Spud’, formerly of the 205th Equestrian Ranger Corps, awarded the Bronze Leaf three times and the Purple Heart twice, as well as the only Pony in living memory to beaten a Gryphon Sword-Sage in close-combat and walked away afterwards.”

Paling, the four Unicorns still standing looked to the fat, sneering Earth Pony behind the bar, whose eye-patch and mangled ears suddenly looked more menacing than before.

“The Pegasus over in the corner, that’s Star Streaks, formerly of the 12th Scouting Corps. Received his Bronze Leaf for flying a tear-gas bomb directly into the face of a Dragon that was attempting to strafe a small farming village on the outskirts of Equestria after the farmers refused to pay it tribute. The Unicorn next to him is Bronze Gong, formerly of the Intelligence division, received his Bronze Leaf for infiltrating and single-hoofedly destroying a cult of lunatics intent of summoning Tirek from Tartarus.” Night Light kept on pointing out the other patrons of the room, taking a perverse delight in watching the armored Stallions whom had come swaggering into the tavern, looking to drag him off, turning white under their fur.

“So lads … your names?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Arses. What a buncha pansies.” Spud muttered as the Royal Guards shoved the would-be kidnappers into the back of a paddy-wagon, made of thick plates of iron bolted together to make a crude box-like shape on four thick, heavy wheels with small, barred windows in the sides, while a medic tended to the two Guards who had been beaten to unconsciousness and then dumped in the skip-bin next to the tavern. “I give them a couple of taps, and they start wailing for their mothers.”

“To be fair, Spud, you did sort of smash three bar-stools over their heads and threaten to insert the broken-off legs of the stools up their plots when that ‘Nickle’ pulled out a knife.” Night Light replied, holding an ice-pack to the head of one of his bodyguards, the young Stallion moaning from the pain of his dislocated horn. “Ah, suck it up son, you’ve had worse.”

“Be that as it may, sir, I think this is the end of my career.” The young Royal Guard moaned again, his horn tilted at an uncomfortable angle. “Getting my ass handed to me by mercenaries is not exactly going to win me any praise from the Captain.”

“Pffft. I’ve been AWOL plenty of times, lad, gotten caught with my C.O.’s daughters, twice, eloped with them while I still served under that same CO, and punched out an Ambassador’s lights after she made a pass at me brides.” Spud laughed, slapping the sorry-looking Guard on the shoulder hard enough to make the Stallion cough in pain. “Your Captain’ll ride your arse good and proper, but you’ll be fine. Just remember to watch your partner’s back next time, and you’ll come out smellin’ like a rose.”

“Speaking of roses, Spud, I’m going to go back with the Guards to the castle and report this to Captain Rosebush. She needs to know that Duke Bluebone is up to his old tricks again.” Night Light sighed and closed his eyes, feeling the weight of his years, and a belly full of booze, once again. “Also, the prospect of having enchanted stone walls, and possible a cell-door of solid adamantite between myself and Velvet when she hears I’ve been in a fight again sounds positively delightful right now.”

“Hmm, I see your point. Me lovelies are likely gonna have me hide for breakin’ the stools like that.” Spud commiserated, earning a startled look from the unfortunate Guard between them. “Still, was nice to see you do that horn-trick again. Smarmy bastards didn’t know what hit them, did they?”

“I was going to ask for the other guys to help, but the ‘mud’ comment derailed that.” Night Light added as a second paddy-wagon rolled up, pulled by four Royal Guards, although this one lacked the iron construction of the previous wagon, mere wood and canvas this time, albeit plastered with the emblem of the Royal Guard and the Night Guard over every possible flat surface. “Ah, looks like our ride’s here, son. Sorry about the mess, Spud.”

“Ah, it was getting dull anyways.” Spud waved off the apology, then grinned wickedly. “You do owe the rest of the lads a round as an apology for not letting them get in on the fun.”

It took hardly any time at all for Night Light and Spud to get the injured Royal Guard into the back of the wagon and settled comfortably on the bench, but his partner, a Pegasus, took much longer, with a broken wing and likely several ribs in the same condition, to get into the wagon’s interior before Night Light realised they’d be there till dawn, wrapped the Stallion in his magic and ignored the pained yelp as he lifted the Guard inside on his own.

“Thanks again, gents. Spud, give my love to the Brides, alright?” Night Light yelled out as the back of the wagon was sealed up and began the long trip back to the Castle.

“Celestia’s Beard, the Captain’s going to be ropeable.” The wounded Pegasus groaned, wincing as he shifted awkwardly in the seat, his broken wing taped to his side to prevent the broken pieces of bone grating against each other. “First we get our asses kicked, then her predecessor’s father has to save us from his own kidnappers. We’re going to be busted down to privates and sent out to the Border Guard!”

“Faust, you two are worst worry-warts I’ve seen in ages...” Night Light sighed, staring out the back of the wagon, watching the quiet, cobblestoned streets of the old part of town slowly give way to the asphalt and concrete of mid-town. “Trust me. When Captain Rosebush hears about Duke Bluebone’s involvement, she’s going to kiss your cutie marks. She’s been looking for an excuse to take that snake down for years, and you’ve just handed it to her on a silver platter, courtesy of six inept mercenaries and a hoof-ful of old soldiers.”

“I can’t believe that Bluebone would make such a clumsy play.” The injured Pegasus muttered, holding a hoof to his comrade’s head to hold the ice-pack in place. “I mean, sending in six Stallions to kidnap you right out of a tavern, in-front of a score of witnesses?”

“You’re fresh to the ranks, aren’t you … sorry, I never did catch your name, son.” Night Light asked, feeling a twinge of guilt. These were other Ponies who had sworn the same oaths as he had, who were protecting his family with their own lives, yet he’d never bothered to ask their names.

“Flurry, and this is Oat Cookie.”

“Dad wanted me to be a baker, like him, but I’m allergic to flour.” The Unicorn explained, rolling his eyes as Night Light tried to not laugh at his name.

“Right, well Flurry and … Oat. Little bit of a history lesson for you. About ten generations back, Princess Celestia got rid of an old law that allowed only Nobles to hold the highest ranks within the military, which allowed her to promote commoners to the upper ranks without having to go through all the rigmarole of marrying them into the existing Noble families, which didn’t sit well with the Noble families that had made their wealth from control of Equestria’s military.” Night Light began to explain, using his magic to create the illusions of several coat-of-arms, belonging to the respective families. “It didn’t make much difference to the bulk of the Noble houses and families, like my wife’s family, the Twilight House, but for families like the Blues, the Steels and the Brazens, it meant they were no longer guaranteed positions of high rank and great influence. While it served the country of Equestria much better than the old way, their respective Families were diminishing quickly in the eyes of their peers.”

“The Blues, out of all the military Houses, were hit hardest, given that their family has practiced marriage-contracts within their House that come perilously close to institutionalized in-breeding, trying to keep the ‘line’ of Princess Platinum alive in case Princess Celestia ever stepped down from the Thrones, as ancient laws first created when Equestria was founded stated that if either Princess was unable or unwilling to perform their duties as Princess, then the descendants of the three original Monarchs of the Three Tribes would step up to fulfil the roles.”

“Celestia’s reformation of the military ended up with many of the Blue House’s more valuable and traditional postings going instead to Ponies whose allegiance was to Equestria and its inhabitants, rather than their own family-members who were more interested in politics and receiving bribes for letting certain things or persons pass through their protectorates than fulfilling their oaths, which put an intense pinch on the House’s finances. And the Blues’ lack of blood-ties to the other families meant that if the Blues fell into ruin, they’d have little impact on the other Noble houses, who are very tightly interwoven with marriages.”

“Fascinating, but what does this have to do with forcing a marriage-contract on your daughter?” Oats muttered, no doubt not appreciating all the noise with the thundering headache his dislocated horn was causing.

“Sorry Oats, I’ll make this as short as I can.” Night Light apologised. “Basically, the Blues have spent the past five generations rebuilding their House from a Military Noble House into a Mercantile one, and during that period they have rebuilt their fortune and bought out massive shares in the media, namely papers and magazines, to help push their agendas. The Blue House has been trying for generations to get back at Princess Celestia for ruining their little nest-egg with the military, and with all the other reforms she’s been introducing over the past two hundred years, there are a lot of other Noble houses who have likewise had their purses pinched and their influence curtailed, and have been giving their backing to the Blue House.”

“So Bluebone is the head of a faction of Nobles who have been trying unsuccessfully to unseat Princess Celestia, mostly through trying to sway public opinion and attempts to cause civil unrest, since before any of us were a twinkle in our parents’ eyes. If he could forcibly marry Twilight to Blueblood, Bluebone would score a major point off of the Princess, earn a lot of respect from the rest of this so-called ‘Shadow Court’, and if the Princess attempted to annul the marriage, it would cause all kinds of legal snarls, as she’d have to give up a lot of political favours to get the Court of Nobles to support her decision.”

“So marrying his son to your daughter isn’t his goal, it’s just one move in some big political fight against the Princess?” Flurry asked, looking paler than before. “I knew the Nobles were a bunch of vipers, but that just sounds …”

“Well, that’s what Celestia and I believe, anyways. Velvet and the members of the Twilight House that are still speaking to us believe that Bluebone wants to inject a stronger magical bloodline into his own, but that runs counter to generations of the Blues rejecting valuable marriage-contracts to keep their bloodlines ‘pure’ in the exceedingly rare case that Celesita steps down from her Throne.” Night Light nodded in sympathy as he watched the Pegasus try to work his way through the confusion he no-doubt felt now. “So needless to say, when Captain Rosebush hears that you’ve helped deliver exactly what she needs to get Bluebone officially charged with a crime that he can’t wiggle out from or bribe his way free from, she is going to be ecstatic. My son, Shining Armor, and his predecessor, Silver Bolt, both tried and failed to catch Bluebone with his pants down. This is going to be the mother of all feathers in her cap.”

The three Stallions lapsed into silence, Night Light wondering if this would finally put an end to the Blues attempts to meddle in his family, the other two Stallions no doubt wondering what the new Captain of the Royal Guard would have to say to them.

They were almost to the Castle itself when Flurry finally spoke again, making Night Light jump in surprise as he had almost believed both Stallions had given in to shock from their injuries and fallen asleep.

“My daughter is going to be so frightened when I come home with a broken wing.” The wounded Pegasus sighed, wearing a worried expression that Night Light knew intimately, that every Father must have surely worn when worrying about their child.

“She knows you’re a Royal Guard, yes? It’s all part of the job.” Night Light offered, but Flurry shook his head.

“Oh, she knows, but my partner and I adopted her. Her … mother … abandoned her after not taking precautions during estrus, and Snowflake got teased about it relentlessly at the orphanage.” The Royal Guard explained, fiddling his hooves together nervously. “She’s always fretting over me when I come home, like she expects me to walk out on her.”

“Well, given that’s a full fracture of your wing-bone, I’d say you’re going to have a good three or four week ‘vacation’ from your duties till the bone fully heals. Plenty of time to stay at home and bond with her, then.” Night Light said, then grinned. “Maybe work on a little sister or brother for her with your wife?”

“Two Stallions can’t make a foal, sir.” Flurry muttered, coloring slightly.

“Ah, so that’s why you said ‘partner’. Odd to see two Stallions together these days, given how few of us there are these days.” The older Stallion chuckled. “Still, congratulations on a successful adoption, Flurry, and finding your Special Somepony.”

“Uhm, yes, thank you Sir. Uh, if you don’t mind me asking, Mr Night, sir …”

“Oh Faust, ‘Mr Night’ is my father, Flurry. Just call me Light.”

“Errr, right. Well, erm, Light, is it normal for a Filly to want to play dress-up with her father? Fathers, rather?” Flurry asked, suddenly looking very nervous. “She keeps wanting us to play dress-up with her, wants us to cook with her, and my partner and I are a little bit … we’re not ‘sissies’, Light. We’re not effeminate. We don’t regret adopting our little Snowflake, but we’re also worried she’s … we’re worried that Snowflake is going to, well, ‘miss out’ because she doesn’t have a Mare in her lfie.”

“Flurry, from one father to another, let me tell you this: You’re going to play dress-up with her if she asks. You’ll cook with her, read her sappy fairy-tales before she goes to sleep, go to her school plays and generally get sucked into whatever she’s doing.” Night Light sighed after several moments of thought. “This is a battle every father goes through, and let me assure you, you’re not going to win that fight, and you don’t want to. Sooner or later, your little girl is going to grow up, and then she won’t want to spend time with her father. It’ll be study-time, or following the latest rock-bands, or trying to flirt with boys, and she won't have time for her daggy dads.”

As the wagon passed into the gates of the Castle itself, Night Light gave the wounded Flurry a wan smile. “I lost my daughter to her own potential, to the Princess and to Equestria itself. I missed out on so much because my little girl had too much potential to let her have a normal childhood. Next time your Snowflake wants to do something girly with you and your partner, Flurry, you do it, because when you’re my age, and you look back on your time as a father, you don’t want to be filled with regret because you were too ‘manly’ to just be with your little girl, damn what other Ponies think.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Bitch.”

“Whorse.”

Trixie and Sunset Shimmer glared at each other across the divide of their ‘cabin’ in the train-carriage.

Getting onto the train in their cloaks had been a trial in and of itself, but thankfully the night-shift Ticket-Pony for the ‘midnight express’ train-trip was more interested in stamping tickets and trying to remain awake rather than asking two patrons to take off their ratty cloaks.

Each blamed the other for their situation, and each was possessed of overwhelming pride in not only their abilities, but their own self-worth. And weeks of travel with only each other from company, with the unfortunate side-effect of the spell that had drawn them together in the first place, causing them to need to remain within a short distance of each other, their enforced partnership always ended each day with a contest for dominance of their little two-pony show.

Sunset Shimmer’s horn glowed, a deep red aura with golden highlights, and Trixie moaned, biting her bottom lip and squirming as the magic dug into her body under the cloak, causing the light-blue Unicorn no end of torment, before Trixie’s horn lit up in retaliation, and now it was two Unicorn mares squirming and moaning on the padded benches.

“Tw-Twilight will … fix this … and Trixie will be rid of … of you!” Trixie hissed, the magical aura surrounding her horn pulsing wildly, making the Mare across the small space from her buck her hips wildly, even as the two glared hatefully at each other.

“Sssstupid she-mule!” Sunset Shimmer spat back, her own magical aura stretching out into long, spike-like waves, making Trixie cry out in both pleasure and pain before shoving a hoof into her own mouth to muffle her shout. “Twilight is … going to … save me, and then she’s going to drive you away again!”

“Nuh-never! Priiiiincess Twilight will save Trixie and send you back through that mirror!” Trixie spat back, alternating her horn’s aura again and assailing Sunset’s body in a new manner that caused the golden Mare to jump off her seat, leaving a small damp spot on the padded cushions, before Sunset’s counter caused her to leap off her seat in turn, the two Mares grappling with each other before falling heavily to the ground, hissing insults at each other even as their bodies slapped together under the rough hemp cloaks, each desperately trying to straddle the other, the junction of their loins the source of a furious contest of flesh before the Mares hissed in unison, baring their teeth at each other in a pained, victorious grin.

“Mine!” Trixie hissed, rolling Sunset onto her back and viciously pounding her hips down as the other Mare squirmed and fought back, denying their shared pleasure before a dark, leathery wing swept out, startling the blue Show-mare and giving her rival a chance to roll both of them over again.

“MINE!” Sunset snapped, chuckling darkly as she gave Trixie a taste of her own medicine, luxuriating as much in the sense of dominance against her erstwhile partner as the heady sensation of warm, wet flesh pulsing against more of the same, two dark, leathery wings more at home on a Thestral or a bat than a Unicorn Pony flapping unsteadily as she struggled to keep her dominant position over the struggling Unicorn.

Back and forth, with each reversal, the two Mares became more animalistic, more determined to be the one on top at the end of their contest as their bodies quaked and shuddered, their hatred for each other rapidly being eclipsed by a deep, burning need for release, held in check only by their need to be better than the other Pony, locked in sexual combat against each other as both wielded their magic against each other, using weeks of hard-won knowledge of each other’s bodies to try and make the other come first, to be the one that endured the longest.

Phantom tongues licked at their nipples, their genitals, illusory mouths pulled at each other’s manes or suckled on their horns, disembodied hooves pressed and stroked Cutie Marks or slapped at the other’s plots, the steady stream of curses and “Mine!” never ceasing to flow from the Mares until their bodies could no longer hold out, the two sitting on their haunches, wrapped in each other’s legs, glaring into each other’s eyes as they gritted their teeth against the pleasure-filled cries welling up inside them, desperately trying to deny even the slightest hint of the pleasure they felt from the other as they came with force enough to make white spots dance before their eyes, their bellies and haunches flooded with sticky wetness as their bodies clenched as tightly they could, before the two fell onto their sides, panting heavily for several moments before pulling apart from each other in unspoken agreement, their bodies separating with a wet squelching noise.

Re-wrapped themselves in their cloaks to hide the shameful magic that had trapped them together, the two Mares denied themselves the warmth of the afterglow rather than risk giving the other even the slightest hint of victory.

Exhausted, the two still managed to cast cleaning spells over their own bodies, and then begrudgingly did the same for the musky pool they had left on the floor before a window was pulled down and the magical bubbles of bodily fluid were flung out the window to land in the abandoned night.

“Twilight will … save Trixie … first.” Trixie hissed, fighting to keep her eyes open.

“Bitch …” Sunset retorted weakly, leaning heavily against the side of the carriage.

“Whorse …” Trixie shot back before fatigue dragged her down into the comforting darkness.

Chapter 14

CHAPTER 14

“Hush now.” Chrysalis whispered, dragging a tattered length of cloth over her sleepy offspring, feeling the strange, squishy feelings grow inside her as one of the little black females cooed and grabbed at Chrysalsis’s hoof, the same feelings that plagued her and her Hive so often when it came to the three tiny, helpless broodlings, especially when one of the broodlings would do something the Ponies would call ‘cute’, like reaching up to rub it’s muzzle against hers or playing with each other.

She’d last felt such things around Shining Armor when she had been impersonating Cadence, but has simply attributed them to being extremely well-fed.

Chrysalis had since come to understand that those feelings were indeed triggered by her over-feeding on Shining’s love for Cadence, effectively tuning her entire body to feed off a single target, and thus making her incredibly vulnerable when her ‘host’ had rejected her outright, causing the internal injuries that were slowly killing her now.

Yet she had not received a single drop of ‘Love’ from her offspring, despite the simple, trusting love she could feel radiating off them towards her and the Drones.

If not for their green eyes and the beginnings of spiralling, twisting horns like her own on their heads, she’d almost swear they were normal Ponies.

But that was impossible. Changeling Queens like herself took in sperm from Male Ponies, or when such was not available, accept essence from their sexless Drones, and then laid eggs, either in specially prepared nests, or preferably within properly pacified female hosts if the egg in question contained a potential Queen, and that was the limit of their child-rearing duties.

Changelings hatched, just slightly larger than a Pony foal, but completely self-sufficient and already linked in to the Hive Mind, if not yet self-aware. Until they developed full sentience, often sometime after physical maturity was reached, these mindless Drones were little more than extensions of the Hive Mind’s will, additional limbs to be manipulated by the sentient Drones and the Queen at will.

Her brood, two black Females like herself, and a unique birth to Chrysalis’s knowledge, a white Male that was an almost identical clone of his father but for the beginnings of a green mane and tail rather than the Stallion's two-toned blue hair, were barely self-aware yet somehow intensely individual despite their lack of identity, drifting through the Hive Mind like little lights of innocence and love, snuggling up to the Mind-Glows of the Drones and her own mind when awake, or gamboling through the entire structure like monkeys in a tree if the whim took them, but otherwise the children were distressingly blind to the Hive Mind when they were asleep, a trait no other Changeling shared.

Several Drones had already complained about being ‘mind-glomped’ by her brood during their duties, describing the sensation as very disturbing due to the Brood’s combination of a lack of self-awareness combined with an inherent ‘individuality’ that kept them separate from the Hive's Mind-Glows, whereas normal ‘Hatchlings’ were more like a large, nebulous masses of Mind-Glow that would, over time, cleave off into individual Drones, and would often merge with the Mind-Glows of the sentient Drones, copying fragments of personality and experience with each meld.

For now, however, the Broodlings would sleep by her side in the warm confines of the wagon, which her Drones had managed to get settled into the cave and out of the wind, and the Kattians had been ‘convinced’ to stay in the cave as well by a vigorous Hive-wide patting/stroking/belly-rubbing effort to keep them in the one place, which had had the beneficial side-effect of making the Kattians produce staggering amounts of love for the Hive.

Through the Hive-Mind, Chrysalis could feel her Drones relief at being so well fed, after almost all of their Love-Brew reserves had been given to the Scouts for their trip to the Equestrian border, and the last of it given to Chrysalis to see her through the night.

Of course, there would be proper ‘harvesting’ required tomorrow morning to provide more of the condensed form of ‘Love’ for Chrysalis to extend her life just another day, but without having to perform the whole process on the move, the Hive would be able to stockpile several weeks worth of Love-Brew with just a few days effort, and just being nearby the Kattians allowed the Drones to absorb the ambient love the Kattians were producing in the aftermath of their pampering session.

Yet underneath all the relief at being fed, there was an undercurrent of fear. Concerns over her health, worries that her current Broodlings would be unable to undergo the metamorphosis into proper Changelings, and thus a proper Queen, dooming every last Changeling in the Hive to a slow mental degeneration, a deep, cutting fear that the Ponies would not agree to her terms of surrender and instead come with fire and sword to wipe her Hive out, and above all others, a chilling terror whenever one of the Drones’ minds turned to thoughts of the Empress and the Elder Queens that sought to eliminate the ‘failed’ bloodline of the Changelings.

Chrysalis did what she could to alleviate those fears, pressing her Mind-Glow against those that grew yellow with fear and pushed her feelings of confidence and the protective instincts her Broodlings instilled in her into their own Glows, and calmed the Drones as much as she could, but if the Scouts could not reach the borders soon, and convince the Guards to let her Drones into Equestria, so that she could reach Canterlot and the Immortals who ruled there soon, then the Empress’s would not only be able to wipe out the Changelings, but her army of Other creatures would wash over the lush, green lands of the other Races, and not even the Elements of Harmony would be able to stop her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Oh-kay, bits for shopping?”

“Uh … check?”

“Illusions that will make us look like a pair of Unicorns?”

“Yes …”

“You’re supposed to say ‘check’, Luna.”

“Yes, check, affirmative, don’t they all mean the same thing?”

“Yes but … the items on checklists being read out should always be answered with ‘check’.”

“Oh, you are going to be fun when tax-time rolls around again. Very well, ‘check’.”

“Shopping list!”

“Cheeeeeck.”

“List of escape-routes, just in case the Paparazzi find us?”

“Check!”

“Okay … well, Luna, I think that’s it.” Twilight sighed, ignoring Luna’s teasing as she looked over the camp-site.

From the air, the camp was almost entirely hidden from view under the branches of a pair of ancient weeping willow trees, but mid-way in the river was a water-worn granite building-block, so massive that even after a thousand years, the river had barely worn away from it at all, a solid land-mark for the two to rely upon to find their camp again.

“So the plan is we use magic to levitate the wagon and fly to the outskirts of the Everfree Forest and then go have … breakfast with your friend, Applejack?” Luna asked as the two Alicorns gave their wings the once over, looking for loose feathers and stretching their muscles before they took to the air, the faintest pink light of Celestia’s dawn creeping across the horizon.

“Somewhat like that, yes. It’ll take us about an hour’s flight to get to the Apple’s property, and they’re normally having breakfast by then.” Twilight explained as the two slowly took to the air, the Apple family’s wagon floating between them, wincing at the chill that immediately attacked them, seeping in past their fur. “We’ll have breakfast there after we drop off the wagon, because you will not believe how good Granny Smith’s apple-fritters are, then we use our illusions in-case anypony is looking for two Alicorn Princesses, and from there it’s an hour’s walk into Ponyville, which should get us into town, and to the library to have a shower …”

“Oh by my sister’s beard, YES! Hot water and shampoo, truly the greatest blessings of civilisation.” Luna moaned appreciatively, sticking out her tongue at Twilight as the younger Alicorn giggled at Luna’s longing for a shower.

“Yes, well, we can use my shower, and it gives me a chance to check on Spike, and by then Ponyville’s shops should all have opened, and we can get our shopping done.” Twilight agreed, trying to steer her subconscious away from images of Luna, her fur and mane slicked down by steaming hot water, asking Twilight to rub the slick, coconut-scented shampoo over her body ... and nearly dropped her side of the Apple-family’s wagon when her concentration wandered. Behaaaaaaaave! Half the reason we need to risk going into Ponyville is because as soon as we lay hooves on each other we lose all sense of control!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rainbow Dash knew she was stalling, but she was also not entirely sure what to do first.

A letter left to Spike, saying she’d gone home, thanks for the couch, yadda yadda, had been the only thing that had gone right last night.

Coming back to her multi-storey cloud-mansion above Ponyville, Rainbow found she was unable to sleep, but also unable to do anything. Disturbingly enough, writing down her ‘plan’ had given her some headway, but now Rainbow realised that she actually had no idea how to approach Twilight from a romantic angle.

Each and every single relationship Rainbow had been involved in had been based on pure physical attraction. It all basically boiled down to “My place or yours.”, and Ponies who were too shy for her abrupt pick-up lines were Ponies that Rainbow Dash had always considered too timid to be any fun between the sheets.

Now, here she was, trying desperately to figure out how to get one of the most clueless and socially awkward Ponies in Equestria to shack up with her, rather than the fabulously wealthy, physically perfect, no-doubt absolutely-freaky-between-the-sheets Immortal Princess who’d popped her cherry.

“Auuuuuugh.” Rainbow groaned, banging her head on the table in the middle of her kitchen repeatedly, trying to jar her brain into gear. She knew Twilight loved adventures, loved to stick to a plan, loved to experiment and learn new things, and loved her friends to a fault.

So why in Faust’s name is it so damn hard to figure out how to just go up and talk to Twilight now? It wasn’t like this was Rainbow’s first time trying to get with somebody who was already in a steady relationship, but it was also Rainbow’s first time at trying to get into a steady relationship for herself.

Just … nervous that this might muck things up with Twilight, that’s all. Rainbow sighed, her head lying on the solidified cloud-matter that made up the kitchen-table, and the majority of her house for that matter, and trying to fight down the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. And I’ve got no idea if she and Luna are actually sweet on each other or this is just a one-time thing. Rarity was saying that the tent smelled of musk … so maybe Alicorns go into estrus at weird times of the year, and they’re just Heat-Buddies?

But it was mid-summer now, and even the latest of bloomers would have gone through their estrus … yet the tent had, according to Rarity, reeked of the musk that Mares only produced during their estrus-cycle.

Twilight’s out in the forest because her magic is running out of control, right? Is this like her ‘Need It, Want It’ spell? She got the itch, her magic ran out of control, it made them both go into Estrus and they’re just banging each other till the spell wears off?

Snorting in disgust, Rainbow lifted her head off the compressed cloud-matter of the table and paced around the kitchen, her wings twitching with frustration.

Tartarus, no! Twilight’s got a crazy streak a mile wide, but she’s not the kind of Pony that’d just sit back and let something like that happen. The cyan-blue Pegasus thought to herself as her eyes trailed to the nearest ‘window’, where the sun was slowly creeping over the horizon, the barest hint of the sun visible over the horizon, but the sky already looking to be bright and cheerful, and annoyingly enough, cloudless. Damn, forgot we’re not scheduled for any clouds for another few days. I could really go for some cloud-busting right now, just to give myself something to do while I think. I’m not good at this sitting-and-plotting-stuff”Y, I just do and let things work out for themselves.

“Damn it …” Rainbow sighed, getting up and leaving the kitchen to try and watch some TV to clear her mind, missing by only a few seconds the bizzare sight of two Alicorns and a flying wagon buzzing low over the tree-tops of the Everfree Forest, just a few minutes flight from the Apple Acres orchard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You’re up early today, Applejack.” Granny Smith said, giving her grand-daughter an odd look before turning her attention back to the batch of apple-fritters cooking in the pan.

“Mmmgh. Sorry Granny, ah know, ah know, but Spike’s asked me for some help. Turns out that bragging nag of a Mare, Trixie, is coming back to town to get some help from Twilight.” The Farm-Pony groaned, drinking her entire mug of black coffee in one go, then pouring herself another mug’s worth from the jug. “Ah’ve gotta get the entire west fence repaired before the train from Canterlot pulls in, an’ ah have got a feelin’ in mah guts that this’ll be a long day.”

“All the more reason to get some more shut-eye.” Granny Smith retorted, but she was smiling nonetheless. “Couldn’t one of Twilight’s other friends do this?”

“Eh, Rainbow Dash would jus’ pick a fight, Rarity said she’s gonna help, but she’s supposed to be lookin’ after the Cutie Mark Crusaders today, Fluttershy’s lookin’ after Zecora an’ she ain’t the best Pony to have around when things get tense, an’ Pinkie is … well … Pinkie. Faust only knows what she’d do in this situation.” The Farm-Pony explained, then sighed heavily, shooting a longing look at the stairs that would take her up to the second storey of the house, and her bed. “Ah’ll fix the fence, do this thing fer Spike, then ah’ll~.”

“Get some shut-eye.” Granny Smith said loudly, flipped the first batch of apple-fritters out of the pan and onto a plate. “You want to have another repeat of that time Big Mac broke his ribs and you tried to tale care of the whole farm on your own? It’s about time you and Big Mac sat down and decided on hirin’ some permanent farm-hands.”

“Granny Smith, we ain’t got the bits for that!” Applejack spluttered, nearly knocking over her mug of coffee in her shock.

“We’ve have the bits if you’d just swallow your dang-fool pride and take the Princess’s bits like the rest of the Bearers did!” Granny Smith snapped, a rare look of anger on her ancient, lined face. “Principles are good and all, but for Hay’s sake, Applejack, at this rate we might not be able to afford Applebloom’s school-fees next year, let alone what might happen if the fruit-bats swing past next season. And you know the Bank has been unwillin’ to say if they’ll extend the loan we took out to cover the loss of the west field’s crop the last time those dang pests came for a meal!”

“Y-ye’re askin’ me to accept charity, Granny?” Applejack asked hoarsely, unable to believe what she was hearing.

“I’m asking you to accept your due, you durn fool! How many times have you gone above and beyond what’s expected of you?” The ancient Mare snapped back without turning around, cooking another batch of apple-fritters. “With those bits, we’d be able to pay off our debts, make sure all our farm-tools and equipment is up to date and repaired, and then we’d be able to put some bits aside to hire some farm-hands, and then you and your brother wouldn’t be working every dang day till you’re bent and broken like me, just to make up for Russet's selfishness!”

The only sound in the kitchen was the hiss of the batter in the pan as Applejack sat there, stunned and disturbed, at the venom that was in Granny Smith’s voice. Such … loathing … in her tone that curdled Applejack’s retort and made her swallow it unspoken.

Her father, Russet Bloom, had bailed on the family when Applebloom had first been born, stealing the family’s heirlooms and emptying their bank account before fleeing across the border into Zebra territory, leaving Grandpa Smith, Big Mac, Applejack and Granny Smith to take care of the farm, Golden Delicious, Applejack’s mother, and the tiny, sickly little filly that had nearly killed her mother during child-birth.

And trying to maintain the farm, with no money and no aid from the Guards, given that all the money the family had had been in Russet’s name in the first place and thus it’s loss couldn’t be considered ‘theft’, and weakened from a difficult child-birth and an infection in her blood, Golden Delicious had died shortly afterwards, her last, delirious words “Where is my Russet? Why isn’t he home yet?”

Shortly after that, Grandpa Smith had also passed on, and while the extended Apple-clan had rallied around the family and helped keep the farm in order, they couldn’t stay forever. It was a testimony to how hard Big Mac and Granny Smith had worked, and then Applejack, to keep the farm from going under, refusing loans and buy-out offers and working from before sun-up till well into the evening to keep the farm going.

“Yah … yah think we’re that hard up, Granny?” Applejack finally managed to speak, her voice cracking with guilt. Did I do this to my kin? “Ah mean, we’ve always had tight purse-strings, but … we ain’t ever accepted money before, not even from our kin.”

“We’re holdin’ our heads above water, but that’s all we’re doin’, Applejack. Big Mac’s barely keepin’ up with his chores, and you’re always being pulled off to Faust-knows-where by the Princesses to flash your sparkly little magical doohickey at something, and Applebloom …” Granny Smith sighed, flipped the second lot of apple fritters onto the plate containing the first and carried it over to the kitchen table, weariness evident in her gait, her joints clicking and popping every step of the way. “I don’t want to see this family go without again and again because of pride, sweetie. I watched your grand-pa work himself into an early grave because he was so ashamed of what his son had done to his family that he thought he had to be twice the Stallion he was before to make it up to us all. I watched your poor sweet mother die of a broken heart because she never knew what had happened to make that no-good scoundrel son of mine run off on her and you kids. I’ve watched you and Big Mac spend what’s supposed to be the happiest years of your lives breaking your backs and hardening your hearts just to keep a roof over our heads.”

“When next you see your friend Twilight again, you tell her you need to send a letter to Celestia. You do it, Applejack. Don’t you feel no shame neither, you earned every single bit a dozen times over. You’re the first family-member since your great-great-great-great-grand aunt Barkbiter to earn a Bronze Leaf, and you’re the apple of the Apple-clan’s eye. You take those bits, and you fix this farm so Russet’s shame doesn’t keep you three down on your knees forever.”

“Ah … ah jus’ feel like ah’m betrayin’ somethin’, Granny. We’ve never needed no-pony before now.”

“Like the Flim-Flam brothers?” Granny Smith asked dryly, sliding the plate of apple fritters under Applejack’s nose.

“Th-that was a once-off!”

“Or the time Big Mac busted his ribs?”

“A fluke!”

“There’s bein’ principled, my girl, and then there’s being just stubborn. Now you finish your fritters, an’ I want you to write a letter to Celestia, askin’ her, please an’ thank you, for those bits. An’ you ain’t leavin’ this house or doin’ no chores till it’s written.” The ancient matriarch of the house-hold said gently, tapping a worn and chipped hoof against the plate when Applejack opened her mouth to protest again. “You’ll get the bits, we’ll pay off the loans, we’ll hire some farmhands an’ you an’ Big Mac can decide where to go from there. I’m too old to be doin’ this no more, Applejack.”

“Well … at least Twilight’s out in the … uh, ah mean, out training with Luna. Gives me plenty of time to come up with a dang good letter for Celestia.” Applejack muttered, picking up and biting into one of the fritters, feeling a touch of her troubles melt away as the sweet pastry and pieces of apple filled her mouth with bliss.

And then there was a knock at the door, and a familiar voice rang out. “Sorry for the intrusion! Applejack? Granny Smith? Big Mac? Are you up yet?”

“Well, maybe you can ask Twilight for help with that letter, Applejack.” Granny Smith said, patiently ignoring the way Applejack put her face down onto the plate of fritters and began sobbing in frustration.

Chapter 15 (Clop Heavy)

CHAPTER 15

Luna wasn’t quite sure if Twilight’s plan to ‘drop in on’ the Apple family was working as intended, given that Applejack looked like she’d just eaten something that violently disagreed with her, but she had to admit, these fritters were magnificent.

And then the ancient Mare, Granny Smith, had busted out the maple syrup.

To Tartarus with the diet! As wonderful as the food was in Canterlot, Luna was always so self-conscious about eating, due as much to the need to keep her incisors, one of the last remenants of her Thestral heritage, out of sight of the squeamish Ponies of this age, as to the irritatingly small portions of elegantly-placed food she had been served back at Canterlot.

Celestia got her own buffet table. For the first year of her return, Luna had got … tiny piddling serves that looked like they should be framed, not eaten. And when informed that the portions were ‘too small’, the head chef had threatened to quit over her ‘complaints’, that cooking was art, and art was not to be questioned!

Thankfully, Celestia had interceded, ‘promoted’ the Head Chef to a distant ambassadorial post in Labyrinthia where his ‘art’ could be exposed to the Minotaurs and their omnivorous diets. Needless to say the Chef had quit and gone into seclusion no less than a week after his new ‘posting’ began.

After that, Luna got her buffet-tables, however the foods she knew and loved a thousand years ago were all but forgotten or ignored by the ambitious chefs all looking to please the ‘Lunar Princess’ with their culinary geniuses. And even then, the constant array of servants all getting under-hoof and insisting on their irritatingly servile little rituals meant that Luna had to wrap herself in the same soft compulsions that Celestia used so as not to look absurd whilst shovelling whole plates of food down, which took all the enjoyment out of the meals as she had to focus constantly on maintaining the compulsion, rather than on the delicious food.

Here, however, she found herself doing just that, to which Twilight and Granny Smith could only laugh and joke about ‘complimenting good food is eating it and enjoying it’, and right now it was a competition between herself and Big Mac to see who was ‘complimenting’ Granny Smith’s cooking the most.

Breakfast, such as it was, ended with a struggle over the last fritter, with Big Mac tugging the plate one way, Luna the other, both of them gritting their teeth and straining before a purple glow encompassed the fritter and neatly dropped it onto Applejack’s plate, who looked at the ‘prize’, then the two Ponies staring at it, and her, and then pushed the pastry into her mouth moments before two hooves slammed into her plate, trying to snatch up the prize.

It has been an age since I had a meal that was so … lively. Warm and lively. Luna thought to herself as she shared a laugh with Big Mac over ‘losing’ to Applejack, the Farm-Pony in question in the kitchen with Twilight washing dishes, while Granny Smith delicately chewed her way through her oat porridge, something soft enough for the old Mare to eat with so many teeth missing.

Big Mac, for his part, was delighted that he wouldn’t have to take the morning off to recover the family wagon from the Forest, but seemed to shy away from questions about how Fluttershy and Zecora were doing, and rather than make a member of the family that had just fed her uncomfortably, Luna quickly tried to change the topic to something safer, like his work.

“I’ve always wanted to know, how exactly do you manage to buck the apples into the buckets?” Luna asked, dragging the discussion away from the two Mares, and Big Mac’s obvious uncomfortableness on the topic. “How do you get an entire tree’s worth of apples to fall into a few buckets, and not all over the ground?”

“Honestly, I don’t know.” Big Mac replied, a look of unease on his face. “We just … do. When I was younger, I thought it was just practice, but I’ve seen farm-hands who’ve worked on orchards all their lives and can’t do what we can.”

“Perhaps it’s your Innate Magic …” Luna murmured, snagging a mug of coffee and adding a generous serving of milk and sugar. Straight black coffee always made her too ... aggressive, first thing in the morning.

“Beggin’ your pardon, Princess, but we’re Earth Ponies, not Unicorns.” Big Mac said after several moments of awkward silence.

“Oh, not magic as in spells or rune-circles. Pegasi channel their Innate Magic into their hooves and wings, allowing them to fly far faster than their wings should allow, and to walk on and manipulate clouds.” Luna explained, feeling now very confused herself. Had the Ponies truly forgotten all of their own secrets? “Unicorns manifest their Innate Magic through their horns, channel the natural energy of the world into spells. Earth Ponies channel their Innate Magic through-out their entire bodies, rendering them stronger and more resilient than any other type of Pony.”

“If I had to guess, I would suspect that, subconsciously, when your family is bucking the apple-trees, you’re sending small traces of your Innate Magic into the trees, asking them to drop their apples where you want them to. Generations of living in the same area, with the same trees and slowly refining their craft, your family has developed a method to channel their innate, internal magic into external objects.” The Lunar Princess finished, taking a sip of her coffee to give herself time to think about where to steer the conversation next, when she sneaked a glance at her conversation partner, who was looking at his hooves as if they’d suddenly turned to gold. “Do they … does nobody remember the old teachings?”

“If you mean magic, then only Unicorns are taught about that.” Big Mac replied in a soft voice, slowly, reverently putting his hooves back down onto the table. “It’s the first time I ever heard anyone talking about Earth Ponies having any sort of magic.”

“Back when the Three Tribes first came to Equestria, the Tribes were at war, Big Mac. Surely, you must have wondered how the Earth Ponies and Pegasi fought the Unicorns, and each other, to a stand-still if only the Unicorns possessed magic?”

“Honestly, there’s not a whole lot of information on that era, and I remember as a Filly, there was a group of historians that got into a knock-down drag-out verbal brawl with Celesita over her attempting to ‘re-write’ history when she questioned the books being used in the public history teaching blocks.” Twilight said, coming back from the kitchen with suds in her mane. Apparently dish-washing was not one of her specialties.

“Wait … Ponies were trying to tell my sister, who had been there when it happened, what the true history was?” Luna asked, incredulous, while Big Mac tried vainly to stifle his laughter at the mental image of Celestia in any sort of brawl.

“Canterlot is a Unicorn city, regardless of what Celestia tries to say.” Sighing, Twilight sat herself down at the table, a quick flash of her horn and soap-scented steam began to rise out of her mane. “I was quite young, so I don’t remember everything, but I do remember it was an all-Unicorn group trying to tell Celestia she was wrong, and at least three of them were senior lecturers at the Canterlot School for Gifted Unicorns. After that, Celestia quickly started ‘home schooling’ me on a lot of subjects, and I only went to a few classes at the school, really.”

“That sounds suspiciously like the Unicorns have managed to erase the knowledge of the Innate Arts from the public domain.” Feeling a massive headache coming on, Luna rubbed at her temples, then took a long drink from her mug of coffee. Why had Celestia let something like this slip through the cracks?

“So you’re saying my family can … use magic?” Big Mac asked after several moments of awkward silence. Indeed, the burly farm-Pony seemed at once both utterly confused and very excited. “I could do something else, other than kick apples down from the trees?”

“Well … given time and training, yes.” Luna replied, wishing to give the young Stallion something positive to focus on. “I remember many of the Knights of Old Equestria were Earth Ponies, and possessed intense stamina and physical resilience. They often wielded lances of living wood, which they could then shape into other weapons. Gallant George was infamous for being able to actually enlarge his lances mid-charge, literally flattening his opponents with a massive oak-tree where they had expected a mere lance. I also recall a small monastic order who master of their Innate Magic actually allowed them to mend injuries by using their Innate Magic to manipulate the Innate Magic of their patients, and together the two forces would heal the physical injuries of the patient.”

“Odd. Celestia said that the ‘Old Magics’ had been lost, but surely she would know of them?” Twilight asked softly as the three Ponies sat at the breakfast table together, united in their confusion.

“That is impossible. You see, Celestia is older than the Three Tribes, and her Tribe had a very different kind of Innate Magic.” Luna replied, equally softly, the only other noise the clatter of Applejack and Granny Smith washing and drying the dishes in the kitchen. “Her kind could alter probability. They could change their own luck, to a certain extent. As such, she could never learn the Innate Magic of the Three Tribes.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chatting with Applejack as she ‘escorted’ the two ‘strangers’, Twilight’s mind swum with revelations.

Celestia didn’t belong to any of the Three Tribes, or the Thestrals, but instead a mysterious ‘Fifth Tribe’, there was an ancient secret magic that Earth Ponies and Pegasi could use, but it had vanished into history, and Celestia had done nothing to preserve it.

And yet, this was the same Mare whose collection of antiques was so vast it doubled as the National Equestrian Museum. Her collected tomes spanned almost every topic, and dozens of Races and civilisations, and every year scholars from all over the known world competed for a chance to gain access to that library to translate and copy the rare, often unique books and scrolls Celestia had collected.

So why had Celestia allowed the knowledge of these ‘Innate Magics’, as Luna called them, to fade out of public knowledge when the Unicorns had managed to hold onto their own magical arts?

Not that Applejack’s news helped settle Twilight’s mind. Trixie and a pony called ‘Sun-something’ were coming to Ponyville today for help with a faulty spell, a spell that Twilight had incorrectly translated, and one she thought she’d burned all the copies of.

And given it was one of those Neighponese spells, she had a horrible suspicion that she knew exactly what spell was to blame.

Although I wonder why Trixie would want another Mare? She seemed to be … well … fixated on Snips and Snails as her servants. The newest Princess, now disguised as a vivid-pink Unicorn with white hair, mused as she let Luna and Applejack carry on the conversation, Luna begging Applejack for recipes and Applejack promising that Luna hadn’t really had ‘Apple cooking’ until she’d tried Granny Smith’s apple-pie, made with real Zap Apple jam and piled high with whipped cream.

It was a wonder that Luna, disguised as a lime-green Unicorn with a white mane and tail, wasn’t drowning in her own drool, but the sight did make Twilight giggle a little, and lift her spirits.

Who would have thought that three years ago, the Mare that she and Applejack, as well as the other Bearers, had battled and then liberated from the Nightmare Spirit would be drooling openly at the thought of apple-based baked goods, or would have opened Twilight’s mind to the chaotic maelstrom of a romantic relationship?

“Twilight?”

“Whuzzat? Sorry, sorry, was just … processing some things.” Twilight yelped, flushing with embarrassment as she realised she had been ignoring her friends.

“Ah was sayin’, what kinda spell do yah think Trixie’s messed up?” Applejack asked again.

“Hmmm, if one of the failed spell-scrolls did survive, I would say it’s probably one of the combat-spells, or one of Weeaboo’s 'Beauty Enhancer' spells?”

“Ugh, yah mean that thing that made mah eyes get so durn big?”

“Trust me, Applejack, when I say that was one of the least awkward members of that group of spell. Some of the others are just plain … well, weird.” Twilight gave a small, sickly chuckle. “There’s a whole host of spells that, quite frankly, confused the heck out of me until I busted Spike’s little stash of ‘Ecchi’ comics. Never doubt the ingenuity of a very horny Unicorn, pun not intended, trapped on an island with nothing but himself and a Mirror Pool.”

“Really? Weeaboo was always so very sweet when Celestia and I went to visit him.” Luna asked in shock, almost missing a step as Applejack and Twilight turned and gave her ‘the look’. “Very socially awkward, but sweet and helpful to a fault.”

“Yeah, well the ‘Pervy Sage’ and his … kinks … really got under the skin of the rest of the Nieghponese, so they were quite happy to give him a small island for his ‘studies’, so that nearby Ponies wouldn’t get zapped by his experimental spells and get turned into caricatures, or worse. They even erected a mystical barrier to ensure he couldn’t be disturbed … or leave without a direct edict from the Empress. They’re still trying to deal with his addition of a third gender to their ranks …” Twilight muttered the last, blushing furiously. Meeting one of those as a child had utterly confused the hell out of ‘Filly’ Twilight, and it had only been Celestia’s lessons that had stopped Twilight committing a social faux-paus and possibly souring relations between Equestria and Neighpone.

“A third what?” Now it was Twilight’s turn to get incredulous looks from her friends.

“The Spear-Maidens? The Empresses’s elite guards?” Twilight ventured, but still only got bug-eyed looks. “Oh-kay then. Uhm, around twelve hundred years ago, the Neighponese had some very … bloody … feuds during Weeaboo’s era, which unfortunately ended up with almost all of the Colts and Stallions of their Nobility either dead or unable to continue their lines. In desperation, the Empress of that era asked Weeaboo to come up with a solution to prevent the Nobles from dying out, and the Pervy Sage did just that, by cursing the eldest two daughters of each family to turn into hermaphrodites, so that they could still carry on the family bloodline while also … uhm … being able to ‘water the flowers’.”

“Whaaaaaaaaaa?” Applejack yelled, flushing bright pink across her face.

“Wait, you mean to tell me all those wonderfully stoic, dutiful soldiers guarding the Empress were …” Luna asked, somehow managing to look mortified even as she blushed. And my sister and I bathed naked in-front of them, more than once, when we visited Neighpone to convince them my return was a good thing! Auuuuugh! And they refused to stand in our presence … I thought it was honouring us, but what if they were … they were … AUUUUUUUGH!

“Yep. It threw their whole society outta whack for a good two hundred years, because Weeaboo didn’t think to compensate for the insane sex-drives the curse caused as a side-effect. Well, he had planned for the original Spear-Maidens to be insatiable, to overcome any hesitation or 'conflicts' between the new Hermaphrodites who had belonged to rival Clans, Clans who had just about slaughtered each other into extinction, but I believe Weeaboo never expected the overwhelming sex-drive to carry on to the next generations, is what I'm trying to say."

"After three generations of his curse being in effect before he managed to 'undo' that part of the curse, one-in-four Neighponese were born natural, irreversible hermaphrodites, regardless of social status, due to the insatiable urges of the hermaphrodites. Even the current Empress is one, or so the rumor goes.” Twilight explained, trying to not burst into nervous laughter. “Some of the Neighponese have built shrines to him as a God of Prosperity and Fertility, because all the energy the Neighpone Nobility were using to slaughter each other over territory and insults to each other’s honor was now being used to more … earthy pursuits, which meant they didn’t have the time or energy to keep fighting each other. Others build effigies of him and burn them to ward off his influence, believing him to be the Spirit of Misfortune for what he did to their families.”

“To try and save face for what she’d unleashed on her people, even without meaning to, the Empress insisted that all such ‘blessed’ children serve as members of her Personal Guard, which was and still is a huge honor, but given how quickly they reproduced, and how fast the curse spread amongst the Neighponese, she couldn’t very well have a quarter of the population serving as her personal guard, so most of their gender instead serves in the general Military or at least works to support the Military. And of course, when one of the succeeding Empresses weakened to all those talented, honourable warriors that served her every whim … well, thereafter, all the Empresses were hermaphrodites as well.”

“AND YAH TRANSLATED HIS SCROLLS?” Applejack really did yell this time, looking horrified. “What if one of us turned into them perm-afro-dykes?”

“Uh, one, I’d never cast such a dangerous spell, especially not without asking your permission first. And two, while I did consider Weeaboo’s ‘Spear-Maiden’ spell as a possible answer to Equestria’s desperately low Stallion-to-Mare ratio, the side-effects were just not worth it.” Twilight protested as she tried to defend herself as Applejack began to chase her, the Farm-Pony whacking at Twilight’s flanks with her beloved hat.

“Twilight, you are not permitted to turn Equestria into a nation of randy hermaphrodites!” Luna shouted, aiding Applejack in chasing a half-laughing, half-protesting Twilight all the way into Ponyville.

Gasping and lathered, Twilight and Luna limped into the Ponyville Library, still laughing about the silliness of their argument and complaining that it wasn’t fair that they were utterly knackered, but Applejack had barely broken a sweat.

“Uh, sorry, but the Library doesn’t actually open to the public for another two hours …” A familiar, high-pitched voice sounded from the counter, where an irritated-looking baby Dragon glared at the two illusion-covered Princesses over the top of a Power Ponies comic, a half-eaten bowl of gemstones in his lap.

“Glad to see you’re ontop of things, Spike!” Twilight said, grinning brightly as she kicked the door shut behind herself and Luna, and then dispelled her illusion. “How’s my favourite assistaaaack!’

“YOU’RE HOME!” Spike yelled happily, having launched himself from the counter and clamping himself to Twilight’s neck, propelling Twilight into Luna and knocking all three of them to the ground. “You’re done with this Sympathy-thingy? We can organise the library again? Is Luna gonna move in with us?”

“Can’t … breathe …” Luna whimpered from the bottom of the pile, while Twilight found herself with the unenviable position of having one of Luna’s illusion-hidden wings pressed into her throat.

After untangling themselves from each other, although Twilight found it considerably harder that Luna with an unrepentantly clingy Spike hanging off her neck the entire time, the two disguised Alicorns managed to stagger their way up the stairs to Twilight’s bedroom, where hopefully some random passer-by would not repeat their ‘invasion’ of the library and stumble upon the two Princesses.

“Ah … Spike, I take it from the ‘moving in’ comment, you know about Luna and my … about our … relationship?” Twilight stammered, looking to Luna nervously for confirmation when she mentioned the dreaded ‘R’ word.

“Y-yes. It’s a … relationship. That we’re … both still quite nervous about … about how to proceed.” Luna stuttered, blushing furiously but forcing herself to keep meeting Twilight’s eyes, and was rewarded with a brilliant smile. “Spike, I must ask you don’t spread the news just yet. Twilight and I are still … we are not sure if mastery of the Sympathy will affect our feelings or not.”

“Oh please, you’re two adorkable princesses, you’re perfect.” Spike said without a trace of shame, utterly oblivious to the furious blushing of the two Mares as he hugged each of their necks and inadvertently brought their faces together, cheek to cheek, above his head. “So long as you leave a coat-hanger on the door or something, we’ll be fine.”

“SPIKE!” Twilight wailed in embarrassment, turning an almost incandescent pink from nose to tail, while Luna simply wondered what a clothes-hanging tool would signify.

“I suppose I should move my bed …” Spike murmured, utterly ignoring Twilight’s spluttering, incoherent protests. “Do you think I should move into the spare room, or the basement? Hummm … basement, definitely basement. Thicker walls, different level of the house.”

Luna wasn’t quite sure what was going on between the Pony and Dragon, but she was certain it was some sort of private joke at her expense as Twilight jumped away, levitated a pillow into the air and began to slap Spike with it while spluttering incoherently … and then her mind finally caught up and realised what the young Dragon was suggesting.

Then it was two Alicorn Princesses turning bright pink and using the nearest pillows to pummel the precocious little Dragon, eventually sending him fleeing, and laughing, from the room.

“Oh my Faust, Luna, I am so, so sorry …” Twilight apologised, feeling absolutely mortified even as her mind came up with methods to get back at Spike, such as transmuting all his precious gems into salt-crystals and seeing how he like chomping down on those!

“Its fine, Twilight, Spike is only thinking of making things less awkward for everypony. After all … you are quite loud in your praises when I am mrph!” Luna replied, giving Twilight a cocky grin, and receiving a pillow to the face for her efforts.

And thus began the first Equestrian Princess Pillow War in the last thousand years.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several burst pillows and an inconclusive tickle-fight with the feathers contained therein, the two Princesses had called a truce, made Spike clean up the mess as punishment for embarrassing them, and had retreated to the bathroom to make themselves presentable for Trixie and her companion, and debating the use of their illusions during the attempt to cure them of this mysterious curse, when Luna looked up at the shower-head, and then gave an appreciative glance at Twilight.

“Wh-what?” Twilight asked, feeling very much like a canary before the cat as Luna’s mouth quirked up into a mischievous grin.

“Did you buy this shower-set, Twilight?” Luna asked, using her magic to unhook the head of the set, a slim pink plastic affair with a recessed, multi-nozzle head, and then turned on the water, slowly heating it to a pleasant temperature before washing down her own mane, and gesturing for Twilight to join her in the stall.

“Uh, no? Rarity bought it for me, after the existing one starting to leak too badly to fix. She said it would be perfect for relaxing … the ‘blast’ setting is good for working on sore muscles.” Twilight said as she stood under the water, sighing as the hot water soaked into her coat, soothing sore muscles that she hadn’t even known had been strained, and Luna then rubbed hoof-fuls of coconut-scented body-wash into her fur.

“Hmmm, rather bold of her.” Luna muttered, but before Twilight could ask what she meant, the purple Alicorn gave a startled yelp as she felt the silken touch of Luna’s luminous tail across her belly and inner flanks, shuddering as her body quivered between the delicious sensation of hot water pounding up and down her body and Luna’s teasing touch, never actually going directly to her erogenous zones but instead circling them slowly, firmly. “Tell me, Twilight, how much time till the Canterlot Train arrives in Ponyville?”

“Aaaaah … you’re askiiiiing that now?” Twilight whimpered, her hips twitching as Luna smiled, and her tail began moving faster, slowly circling inwards … “Aah-haah! It’s about se-seven now, so the traiiiin should arrive about nine-ish! Gah! Lunaaa … that’s cruel! You said we wouldn’t be doing this till we got the … mouthwash!”

“Ah, I won’t be kissing you on the mouth, Twilight.” Luna whispered in turn, leaving her face just out of range as Twilight leaned forwards for a kiss, levitating the shower-head back up towards Twilight’s head, washing the coconut-scented suds down over Twilight’s flanks and Luna’s own tail, before raising the head to just below Twilight’s neck, the soft click of the recessed head as the dozen hot streams of water were replaced by three thicker, harder blasts of water as Luna toggled the ‘massage’ mode. “And besides, I need to help you.”

“He-help me with what?” Twilight asked, wide-eyed, as Luna slowly levitated the shower-head under Twilight’s body, shivering as she felt the three harsh streams roughly part her fur, going from her chest, down to her belly, pounding roughly at her small, firm breasts before beginning to work on her treasure, making her give a high-pitched whinney of surprise and delight as the hot, furious streams of water came into contact with her pearl.

“Why, helping you decide just what sort of toys you prefer.” Luna whispered, grinning wickedly as Twilight’s eyes bulged and her mouth opened in a surprised gasp as the slender, pink shower-head came in close, and then was worked slowly up and down the crease between Twilight’s hind-legs, the overflow of water streaming over her inner thighs and breasts, before Luna’s magic took a firmer hold and pressed in.

“Holy FAUUUUUUUUST!” Twilight yelled, only just stopping her hind-legs from giving out as the slender pink invader slowly worked its way in just a little further with each thrust, the hot streams of coarse water pounding at her uncharted folds, and when Luna twisted just right and the streams pounded right there, it was all Twilight could do to lurch forward, bury her face in Luna’s flowing mane to muffle the delighted yell that burst from her lips despite her best efforts to remain in control.

“Right now, I think it should be my name you should be calling out, Twilight.” Luna teased, holding Twilight close with her forelegs as she used her magic to push harder and faster, Twilight’s body quivering against hers, the sweet odors of musk and coconut filling the steam-filled room.

“Luuuuu-oooooh! Luunaaaaah! LUNAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, should I move my comics first, or the stash under Twilight’s bed?” Spike wondered aloud, all but skipping up the steps.

Even though he was ‘moving out’, so to speak, a part of him felt sad that he’d no longer be able to have Twilight’s presence nearby as he slept. It wasn’t that long ago that he’d be sneaking into Twilight’s bed whenever a thunder-storm passed overhead, or a particularly bad binge of ice-cream gave him nightmares, and lying curled up under the blankets, with Twilight holding him close in her sleep, always made the world seem safe and warm to him.

Now, however … a different part of him, a part that had awoken when he’d seen Rarity, was rejoicing at finally being ‘alone’, to have privacy, to make a ‘man-cave’ for himself in the basement, where he could put his things where he wanted, rather than where Twilight’s ‘organisation skills’ deposited them.

And the rest of his being quailed at the thought of walking into Twilight’s room and catching her and Luna in an intimate act. They were both very attractive Mares, and now both were Alicorns to boot, the supposed height of Ponykind’s beauty, but still Twilight was somewhere between older sister and mother to Spike, and Luna felt more like a cousin, a distant one, but there was a sense of … kinship? If not for their love of games, then because if there was anyone who knew how it felt to be an outsider in your own society, it was Spike, a Dragon growing up amongst Ponies, who could sympathize with Luna, an Immortal who had spent a thousand years apart from her people and was expected to just automatically adapt to a society so different from the superstitious, barbaric age she knew.

“Holy FAUUUUUUUUST!” Somebody screamed from the second storey of the library.

That sounds like Twilight! Spike blinked, the shock of the piercing tone of that shout making all thought flee his mind for several seconds before he finally recalled the whole reason that Luna and Twilight were out here: The Sympathy. Where uncontrolled magic from either one would seek out the other and cause ‘symptoms’, whatever they were.

“Hold on Twilight!” Spike shouted, charging up the stairs, images of Twilight and Luna being assaulted by uncontrolled magic, being simultaneously burnt, frozen and shocked all at once, being transmuted together, being turned to stone, whirling through his mind.

His claws were inches from the door-handle when he heard more shouting.

“Luuuuu-oooooh! Luunaaaaah! LUNAAAA!”

There are moments in every young male’s life, when fate conspires in ways most foul to tempt them into actions that will taint their minds and befoul their relationships, where hormones war with kindness and empathy, the impulses of the flesh contest the dominion of rationality and the pure love of those closest to them.

The part of Spike’s mind that had awoken after seeing Rarity urged Spike to put his eye to the key-hole in the door and see just what was going on … just in-case Twilight needed his help, of course.

The part of Spike’s mind that remained the gentle-tempered young Dragon protested that this was icky and gross, and Twilight was going to punish the hell out of them all if they were caught.

The rest of Spike, thankfully, was neither callow nor indecent, and thus did the only thing any sane, rational younger brother could do when exposed to this situation.

Sticking a claw in each ear, Spike turned smartly on his heel, heading for the stairs, loudly saying “NOPE NOPE NOPE!” as he retreated to the safety of the basement.

Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16

Applejack took one look at the glowing couple of Alicorns at the kitchen table, and the young Dragon muttering to himself as he stomped down the stairs, carrying a cardboard box almost as big as he was, and mentally congratulated herself on thinking to split up with Twilight and Luna to go fetch Rarity and Pinkie Pie when the trio had reached the outskirts of town.

She remembered how she had been when she first discovered that all that annoying junk between her legs had an actual use, and the Farm-Pony wasn’t sure she could handle hearing two Immortals going at it first thing in the morning.

And no, that was not hyperbole, the two of them were literally glowing, a soft, dusky-purple radiance surrounding them.

“Well … I am assuming the ‘Sympathy’ is well in hoof?” Rarity asked bluntly, levitating a styrofoam cup of coffee to her face, grimacing at the bitter taste of store-bought coffee. “Or will you two be roughing it in the forest for a few more days?”

“Uhm, we think we’ve got a handle on most of it … and Faust knows, I’ve missed showers.” Twilight sighed, then giggled at something as Luna leaned down and whispered something into her ear. “Nooooo! Well, I suppose I could put up one-way illusions on the windows …”

“Uhm, Twi, this isn’t your house, it’s a government building, we’re just living here as part of your employment as the town librarian.” Spike warned as he navigated his way to the basement steps, barely able to see around his box of possessions.

“Wait, are you serious, Spike?” Luna jumped, the glow disappearing from the couple as a worried look spread across Luna’s face. “A Princess of the realm does not have her own abode?”

“Well, I’ve sort of never needed one before, Luna. I either lived in Canterlot Castle while I was Celestia’s student, and then when I came here and took over the librarian position, part of that job came with actually living in the library.” Twilight shrugged, as oblivious as Luna to the lack of glow around them now. “Besides, I don’t think putting up illusions will violate my contract with Mayor Mare and Ponyville.”

“I was talking more about the damage you two did to the bathroom.” Spike shouted just before slipping into the basement stairwell, missing the blushes that spread over everypony’s faces at his lack of tact.

“So … uhm … before this gets any weirder, how are we gonna deal with Trixie an’ her friend?” Applejack coughed, trying to redirect the conversation to less awkward topics.

“Well, that’ll depend on Trixie. If she’s trying to show-boat, we’ll have to do damage-control until we can get her into the library, counter-spell whatever magical effect is causing her such trouble, and then … I have no idea. I guess we just wing it.” The purple Alicorn groaned, rubbing at her temples in frustration. “But Spike said the letter mentioned both Trixie and this Sun-something Pony were both mortified by the effects, which makes me think we’re going to have to be very subtle about this, because they’ve likely been turned into caricatures thanks to Weeaboo’s spells and my own mistranslating of them.”

“Yes, well, on another note, I remember you taking the whole batch of translated scrolls and burning them, Twilight. Very enthusiastically at that. So how did Trixie get her hands on one of those flawed scrolls?” The white-coated Fashionista asked, taking a seat at the table opposite Twilight, followed quickly by Applejack taking the seat opposite Luna, and Pinkie parking her pink posterior on the kitchen counter.

“I have no concrete evidence … but I think somepony in Ponyville has been spying on me, and selling the pictures and stories to the gossip-magazines for some time now. It explains how they could have articles on all of us so quickly … and in my haste to get rid of those damned Scrolls, I didn’t do anything to the ashes but dump them in the trash.” Twilight explained, not noticing the startled look Rarity shot Luna, who shook her head quickly.

“No, not one of ours, Miss Rarity. They were selected on loyalty to Equestria, and that precludes taking bits on the side.”

“Yet whoever did this had the magical know-how to return ashes to a fully-functional spell-scroll.” Rarity protested, wringing her hooves and flicking her head around to stare out the windows. “You must admit, Princess Luna, that that is a very disturbing ability for a spy.”

“It’s … not actually that difficult, Rarity. All you need is the right spell, all the components of the destroyed item, identical components that would have been used to create the original items, and then poof, you can restore any inanimate object.” Twilight pointed out, giving Rarity a puzzled look. “And I doubt it’s a spy, Rarity, just another gossip-hound looking for a cheap story and some free bits. It’s very disturbing that they’d go rifling through my trash, but personally I’m more worried they might have restored more than one scroll! If these things are floating around Equestria, it could be a potential disaster if somebody tries to mass-produce the flawed spells and sell them to other Ponies.”

“Ugh, that’d be all we need, Ponies runnin’ ‘round with huge eyes an’ spikey hair … and the other stuff too. Brrrr.” Applejack shuddered as she involuntarily thought of every Mare running around with double-equipment, and Twilight’s words about them having increased sex-drives.

“Awwww, but I liked those spells!” Pinkie protested, pouting from her perch on the counter.

“Sugarcube, you got a fancy lil’ dress outta it. Ah got eyes big as dinner-plates, an’ Rares looked like one of her parents was a hedgehog.”

“I wouldn’t refer to that dress as ‘fancy’, Applejack. Flirty, perhaps. Suggestive, even. But not ‘fancy’.” Rarity muttered, a dark look crossing her features. “The fact that it didn’t cover half of what it needed to for either modesty or protection makes me think that this ‘Weeaboo’ character was simply nothing more than a gigantic pervert!”

“Ah think that’s well established now, Rares.” Applejack pointed out, chuckling to herself.

“Well, regardless of what spell they are suffering from, it’s my duty as the creator of the translated scroll to fix it. Once I start casting, I’ll need everyone to leave the room, in-case the spell starts to ‘leak’ when I am performing the counter-spells.” Twilight spoke up, looking at all of her friends firmly. “I want you all to promise me that you won’t come into the room until I give the all-clear. Bad enough two random ponies have been affected by my mistake, I won’t risk my friends on-top of that!”

“While Rarity, Applejack and Pinkie should leave, I will remain behind to assist you, Twilight.” Luna interjected, raising an eyebrow as Twilight opened her mouth to protest. “I will be able to reinforce your containment fields if the spells do leak, and Sympathy or not, as a fully matured Alicorn I am far less susceptible to hostile magic than a normal Unicorn like this ‘Trixie’ pony.”

For a couple of seconds, the two Alicorns looked at each other, not glaring, not staring, just looking, before Twilight relented and nodded her agreement.

“Well now that that’s out of the way, can I throw the party now?” Pinkie asked loudly as Spike returned to the room, putting both claws to the small of his back as he walked as if he’d strained them.

“A party for what?” Twilight asked nervously. Pinkie’s parties had a tendency to be … out there … if she wasn’t kept in check.

“The ‘Thanks for making me lose 100 bits to Rainbow Dash and congratulations on coming out of the closet’ party!”

There was, again, silence at the table, looks of horror on the faces of Applejack, Spike and Rarity, and looks of confusion on the faces of Luna and Twilight.

“Please, forgive my asking, but the ‘coming out of the closet’ part I understand, if am not comfortable with … but why do you owe Miss Dash a hundred bits?” Luna asked, reaching for Twilight’s hoof under the table. The Pink One was up to something …

“Oh, I owe Rainbow a hundred bits because she bet you were hiding in the closet, and I bet you weren’t, and now you and Luna are together, I owe her a hundred bits! Which is annoying, because I really wanted to use those bits to make cakes for you all, but you’re happy and have a Mare-Friend, and that’s worth every bit in Equestria! Aren’t you lucky?” The pink, laws-of-physics-breaking Mare replied cheerfully, completely oblivious to the rage that spread across Twilight’s face, and the way her eyes glowed white.

“N-now calm down there, Sugarcube! It’s jus’ Dashie, you know how she …”

“Twilight, dear, breathe! It’s just a juvenile …”

“OH SHI …”

“Oh don’t be a party pooper Twi …”

“Twilight, you must not …”

“BbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In her cloud-mansion, Rainbow Dash found herself suddenly, and inexplicably, ejected vertically from her prone position on the couch, smacking into the ceiling with such force she remained there for several seconds, before falling back with a pained grunt onto the cushions.

“Wh-what just happened?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In Sugarcube Corner, many of Ponyville’s early-risers had ducked in to enjoy a hot beverage before the daily rush began.

The Cakes enjoyed these early-mornings, as it gave them a chance to talk to their customers and get valuable feedback, and normally such mornings passed without incident, and as such when the windows of the shop began to vibrate madly in their frames.

“Odd … I don’t recall a storm being scheduled …” Thunderlane muttered, staring up at the clear, cloudless morning sky.

“Well, I’m sure it’s nothi-“ Mr Cake began to say, before everything shook.

There was no other word to describe it. The coffees and hot-chocolates splashed up out of their containers, yet did not spill a single drop, the Ponies were shaken by an invisible force in their seats, but did not fall, the building shuddered as if caught in an earthquake, yet not one crack appeared in the wall, not one cake was disturbed in the display cases.

And as suddenly as it had started, the invisible phenomena stopped, leaving a shop full of very startled Ponies clutching their beverages and pastries, looking at each other in shock.

“What just happened?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna took one look at Twilight, hunched over the kitchen-table, teeth gritted and steam rising off her body and wings, and then shook herself, as suddenly chilled.

The other Ponies in the kitchen looked dazed, although Rarity seemed to be more concerned about her mane possibly being messed up rather than the sheer amount of raw arcane power Twilight had just emitted, and then throttled, before it could cause any true damage.

Spike, however, simply toddled over, climbed up onto the kitchen table and began to soothingly rub Twilight’s mane for her, and gave Luna a meaningful look, giving her a silent thumbs-up when Luna took over the ‘grooming’ and Twilight stopped shaking so badly.

“Oh … oh, now ah know how a martini feels …” Applejack groaned, trying to stand up before wobbling dangerously and sitting back down in a hurry.

“Is my hair alright? Somepony, is my hair alright?” Rarity hissed, patting at her luxuriously permed mane as she looked for any sort of reflective surface.

“Oh wowie, that was a doozie! My Pinkie Sense didn’t even give me a single warning!” Pinkie Pie chortled, apparently no worse the wear for being at the epicentre of what could have been a crater if not for Twilight’s overly-taxed self-control.

“Twilight, are you alright? Oh by my sister’s beard, don’t do that to me again, I thought you were going to … these power-fluctuations of yours are triggered by intense emotions!”

“JUST … Just give me … a moment. I need to … calm down.” Twilight grated, but thankfully didn’t shake Luna’s hooves off, taking several long, deep breaths before finally looking up and glaring at Pinkie Pie. “So let me get this straight, Pinkie. You and Rainbow took bets on my sexuality, and didn’t think that I might not get offended at my love-life being treated as a game to you?”

“Of course not, silly-filly! Why would you get upset? It’s not like you were going to lose any bits!” The pink Mare giggled, and seemed bemused when every other being in the kitchen lunged forwards and gave Twilight an emergency group-hug as the tangy odor of burnt ozone began to build again. “Dashie and I are always betting on things, because it’s fun!”

“Pinkie, would ya kindly jus’ shut up?” Applejack snapped, holding Twilight’s left hoof and stroking it in what she hoped was a soothing manner.

“Oh come on, it’s no different than when you and Dashie are challenging each other to races or hoof-wrestling matches!”

“Kinda is different, Pinkie!”

“Pinkie Pie, honestly! Think before you open your mouth, please!” Rarity pleaded, holding onto Twilight’s right hoof and kneading it between her own two fore-hooves. “A lady’s heart is not something to be gambled upon!”

“Well, what are we supposed to do? It’s not like Twilight can bet, she’s the only one who knows which way she swings, so it’s not fair for her to be part of the bet!” Pinkie pointed out, completely missing the whole point of Rarity and Applejack’s argument. And the streams of arcane power oozing out from Twilight’s tightly-clenched eyes.

“Pinkie, perhaps you should go … home.” Luna suggested, trying to keep her voice as calm and level as she could. “Go home and prepare for a party, just in case Trixie and her friend decide to stay in Ponyville for a while?”

“Of course not, silly! I need to stay right here and …” Pinkie’s reply was lost in a sudden whooshing noise that ended with a brittle snap noise, and a flash of purple light.

In the stunned silence, three Ponies and a Dragon looked at the scorch-marks on the bench where Pinkie had once sat, and the Pony in the middle of their hug who had started to steam again.

“Uh, Twi? Not that ahm judgin’ … but where’s Pinkie?”

“Someplace far from here, where she’s going to get a full lecture on the nature of being a good friend!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There had been a moment of … disturbance, as if all of Equestria had trembled beneath the force of something implacable and terrifying, and then they had found themselves in this situation.

Celestia stared at Pinkie and felt embarrassment welling up, threatening even her legendary, unflappable will.

Discord stared at Pinkie and wished for the hundredth time that his Cultists had never had descendants, especially ones who could access his reality-altering powers.

Pinkie stared at Celestia and Discord and wondered exactly what game required pink frilly garments like what Celestia was wearing, and why Discord needed five bottles of instant whipped cream and a giant bowl of chocolate sauce.

The awkward silence held for several moments before the impossibly perky pink Pony spoke up.

“Soooo … that’s how Equestria was made!”

“Oh dear sweet Faust no …” Celestia moaned, holding one of the frilly adornments up to hide her face. She wasn’t entirely sure how one of her Ponies, especially that Pony, had managed to get inside triple-layered barriers and bypass all the security spells she had recently woven into her private rooms, but right now damage-control was her first concern, not security.

“Err, no …” Discord muttered, trying to hide behind Celestia without giving himself away. The Pink Pupil just had to pop in, right when Discord had almost convinced Saucy Sunbutt to play hookey and spend the day with him! “I wouldn’t say this is how Equestria is made …”

“Well then, are you baking something?”

“I … don’t think that’s … possible.” Celestia mumbled, blushing slightly. And quailed internally as she realised that ever since her affair with Discord had started, she hadn’t used a single contraceptive spell once.

“More like basting and stuffing, or at least we were before you showed up.” Discord muttered darkly.

“So … if you’re not re-enacting the creation of Equestria, or baking, why do you have all that whipped cream … oh! OH, I know!”

“Ah, Pinkie Pie, as … interesting … as your unexpected visit is, perhaps you should …”

“You’re trying to make a cake for Twilight and Luna making it official? I knew a ‘Congratulations on coming out of the closet!’ party was a fantastic idea!”

Once again an awkward tableau held sway as Pinkie looked from one Immortal to the other, all but bouncing on a pile of … things that Discord had discretely bought using a disguise as a Pony for his ‘revenge’ on Celestia, making them clatter and squeak and flex against each other inside the silk sack.

“Beg pardon?” Discord said quietly, turning his full attention to the annoying Pony, his face going slack with surprise.

“PINKIE PIE! They are not … it’s just the Sympathy!” Celestia protested weakly.

“Nope, I’m fairly certain they had just finished fooling with each other’s flanks when Rarity, Applejack and I went to visit them at the library today. Oh, that reminds me, Twilight needs to fix a spell she messed up, that that meanie-pants Trixie cast on herself and Sunset Shimmer, and …”

Pinkie’s babbling was throttled as a cord of golden energy wound itself around her muzzle, a suddenly pale and serious-looking Celestia abandoning all pretense at hiding what she and Discord had been doing and fixed her best ‘Angry Princess’ look on Pinkie.

It was a testimony to her long tenure as Princess that it affected Pinkie Pie enough to make her pay attention and stop trying to make jokes even when muzzled.

“Trixie and who, Pinkie?”

Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

“We could have this meeting tomorrow, Twilight …” Rarity offered, standing well-back from Twilight as Luna did … something … to Twilight's neck with her horn.

As a Unicorn, Rarity was well aware that powerful members of her Tribe needed strong emotional control to prevent random outbursts of their magic, but despite Twilight’s ability to fly into a raging panic at the moment things did not go according to plan, she had never seen or heard of the other Mare having such outbursts before except for the story of when Twilight had first come to the attention of Princess Celestia.

Then, Twilight had transmuted several other Ponies into inanimate objects, almost exploded from trying to channel so much raw arcane energy and hatched the Dragon Egg that contained Spike. And now, Twilight had apparently just teleported Pinkie Pie to Canterlot, although her exact location there was something Twilight had said she wasn’t certain of, only that she’d wanted to send Pinkie to Celestia for a scolding. Badly.

“Rares, what is Luna doin’ to Twi?” Applejack whispered, both Mares watching as that same dusky purple glow surrounded both Princesses again, with an especially ‘thick’ concentration around Luna’s horn as she ran it up and down Twilight’s neck.

“I’m not entirely certain what Luna is doing, Applejack, but I know what Twilight did, and so I do suggest we do and say nothing till Luna or Twilight says otherwise.” Rarity whispered back. “Unicorns that lose their emotional balance begin to suffer ‘Flashes’ that pulls magic from around them into their own bodies, and with each ‘Flash’, they become more emotionally unstable until the additional magic is purged from their systems, and the more upset they become, the more magic they pull into themselves, like a vicious cycle. Right now, Twilight’s not in total control of her faculties, so …”

“So do nothing to make her get emotional, got it.” Applejack muttered, shooting a nervous look at the scorched portion of the kitchen bench, where Spike was scrubbing at the black marks with a scouring brush to try and remove the marks. “Don’t really want to try teleporting without being told first neither …”

“Twilight, are you feeling better?” Luna asked after several minutes of silence, to which Twilight nodded wordless, then began to shake and sob. “Oh Twilight, it is not something to fret over …”

“No … no, it is something to fret over! I lashed out at Pinkie. Yes she was being stupid, but I … what if my spell had been off? She could have been teleported miles into the air, or into a wall, or even transposed ontop of another Pony!” Twilight sobbed, tears beading up in her eyes. “I-I’ve got to go to Canterlot, and go look for her!”

“You will do no such thing. We can’t just go waltzing into Canterlot right now, not without a lot of Ponies asking us a lot of awkward questions and putting my sister on the spot about our ‘training exercise’.” Luna warned, wrapping a hoof around Twilight’s neck and pulling the younger Alicorn into a hug. “Pinkie Pie will be fine, and hopefully learn a lesson about taking others feelings into consideration.”

“Look, Twilight, after we sort this mess with Trixie and her friend, I’m sure if you send a letter to Celestia, she’ll be happy to send some guards to look for the biggest impromptu party in Canterlot, find Pinkie and put her on the next train back to Ponyville.” Rarity offered nervously, sighing in relief as Twilight nodded after several seconds of internal debate. “One problem at a time, dear.”

“Speakin’ of which, we’ve got less than half an hour to get to the station and pick these two Mares up. Ya’ll ready for this?” Applejack asked, looking from the despondent Twilight, the nervous Rarity, the sad Luna and the surly-looking Spike. “Course we’re not. But when has that stopped us before?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several Hours Earlier …

“Night Light, wonderful as always to see you.” Rosebush said, smiling warmly at the older Stallion as she escorted him to the cells. “Normally, I’d wonder why an innocent Pony was requesting to spend the night in our cells, but … I’ve met your wife.”

“Well put, Rosebush. Besides, if Bluebone hears that his mercenaries were trounced and gave up his identity as the patron who hired them to kidnap me, he’s likely going to come running to try to silence both parties.” The dark-blue Unicorn said with a chuckle as they passed several Royal Guards, all of whom saluted sharply when their Captain came into view.

Unlike the ‘normal’ Guards, who had the full list of military ranks, Rosebush was the Captain of a small, elite force numbering just under a thousand and sworn to protecting the Palace and the Princesses who dwelled there, known as the Palace Guard. Despite all wings of the military being dubbed ‘Royal Guards’, given their allegiance to the Princesses, each ‘wing’ of the military was supposed to be both independent of each other, and yet also be able and willing to support and work with the other wings as the situation required with a minimum of fuss.

The ‘Palace Guard’ focused on short-range and defensive tactics, the better to perform delaying actions within the confines of the Canterlot Castle, but that did not mean they were unable to hold their own against the normal range of enemies. It also meant that, technically, Rosebush, and Shining Armor before her, had held equal rank to the Generals Dart, Breach and Rhinestone, as well as the Commander of the Lunar Guard, Thunderwing. And it was a rank she wielded eagerly to protect her charges, and often.

“Well, you’ll forgive me for this, Night Light, but I’m just putting two Guards at your door tonight, although they are two of Thunderwing’s finest Lunar Guards.” The young Royal Captain explained as they rounded a corner, missing Night Light nearly missing a step when the Captain mentioned Thunderwing, where at the end of a long hallway, two burly Thestrals flanked a solid, dull-purple metal door, covered in a fine lattice of golden runes that glowed visibly even from a distance of two-dozen meters. “I’m redirecting every Guard that I know is both competent and has no connections to the Nobility to stand guard over those Mercenaries. I want them alive and squealing in the Royal Court when we drag Bluebone by his withered, dried-up balls before Celestia and Luna to face his punishment!”

“Well now.” Night Light whistled as he looked at his new accommodations. “A solid plate of adamantite, and that looks like the Princess’s own hoof-work on those magic runes. I imagine that cell would be a bitch to break out of?”

“Or breaking into it. Only Celestia, Luna or Cadence possess the arcane 'key' that can open that door. It’s got more rune-work on both its inner surfaces, as well as on the outside of the cell itself, walls, ceiling and floor all three-foot thick slabs of adamantite magically welded together and inserted whole into the mountainside, then fused to the bedrock via several anchor-points.” Rosebush explained with obvious pride in her voice as the two Lunar Guards saluted her, and gave Night Light curious looks. “Ideally, this is the cell we’d use to imprison a threat along the lines of a Necromancer or perhaps even a Demon-Bull, as it’s intended to not only keep the prisoner from escaping by redirecting their magic back at them in a variety of nasty forms, should we so desire, but to also prevent anyone but the Princesses from releasing the prisoner with ease, in-case they have backup.”

“Errr … apologies, Captain, but who is the Stallion?” One of the Thestrals rumbled, displaying the wickedly sharp canine teeth that had once made Ponies of a less scientific age condemn them as blood-drinkers. “Why’re we putting him in the Ultimate Confinement room?”

“Night Light is a former member of the Royal Equestrian 205th Rangers, and is a guest, not a prisoner. So long as none of his requests means you leave your posts, or let him out of the cell without my express permission, they are to be obeyed without question.” Rosebush said, stressing the ‘guest’ part, which made Night Light wonder, briefly, if that perhaps they weren’t being too cautious.

It wasn’t as if assassins or poisoned tea were the worst things he’d woken up to on or off the battlefield. Perhaps just a normal cell would be enough, maybe Rosebush was being a bit too … extreme …

But after a night of getting worked up with ‘inspiration’, and then having her husband not return home, facing assassins would be far preferable to dealing with an overly-kinky wife whom possessed more ‘illustration aids’ for her novels than the Royal Guard had weapons in their armory.

At the very least, the assassins would kill him quickly. Twilight Velvet would force him to proof-read her work …

“Just slip me the morning paper and we’ll get along just fine, gents.” Night Light nodded to the two Lunar Guards and stepped into the room, noting that somebody had had the foresight to place a thick sheep’s-wool blanket and a foam pallet on the bench-like bed for him.

“I don’t need to remind you two that Thunderwing has specifically asked for the job of protecting Night Light fall to her Guards. There’s already been one attempt on his life tonight, they may come back for a second attempt in the castle itself. Screw this up in any way, and it will reflect very poorly on Commander Thunderwing.” Rosebush briefed the two Guards as the thick, adamantite door slowly swung shut, silent but for the muffled thump of the door meeting the frame, and then the bell-like clattering as rods of adamantite were extended into the walls of the cell itself, effectively sealing it off from the rest of Equestria.

Thunderwing, eh? Night Light sighed, shaking his head as old memories bubbled up to the surface. It had been a long, long time since they’d served together …

Possibly stepping out of the fire and into the Dragon’s mouth here … Night Light mused as he slipped under the blanket, hoping to get a few hours of sleep, at least, before having to give his report to the Princess, and probably get an earful from his wife.

As a much younger Ponies, Velvet, Thunderwing and he had considered forming a Herd, with his affection for both Mares and their friendship with each other making choosing one or the other all but impossible.

Of course, the Twilight House had gotten very vocal about its displeasure of one of their most prestigious bloodlines mingling with a low-born Unicorn and a Thestral, and the Thestral Colony had been scandalized at the grand-daughter of their Alpha looking to bind herself to two wingless Ponies.

Eventually, Thunderwing had withdrawn from the relationship, bowing to the pressure from her Colony, but had never taken a mate of her own. Rumour had it that she’d eventually used her position as the new Alpha to take revenge on the hard-line members of the Colony who had been so dead-set against her marrying outside the Tribe, and banished them to dead-end jobs in the farthest reaches of Equestria, effectively crushing their careers and political influence, but by the time the Colony had become open-minded enough to reconsider a union with a Non-Thestral …

By then, Velvet was already pregnant with Sparkle, and I had retired from the Rangers so I could be a proper father to Shining. Sighing heavily, Night Light turned over and tried to not think about how much it had hurt to see Thunderwing staring at them across the street, a young Shining at their heels and Velvet well into her second pregnancy. She’d simply nodded, then taken wing and flown away, and refused to meet with them outside of her ‘work’ as a Lunar Guard. I suppose, to Thunderwing, Velvet and I betrayed the trust we all shared. She probably thought we should have waited for her, or that Velvet would have held back and not taken me as a Mate if Thunderwing couldn’t either.

Present Time ...

Despite having been ‘retired’ for two decades, the lessons and instincts engraved into Night Light by combat were still there, if blunted, and as such when something came up to him in his sleep, the Stallion woke but kept his eyes only just slightly open.

One of the Guards? Or one of Bluebone’s assassins? He wondered, trying to move ‘naturally’ as if dreaming, moving so as to allow the sliver of sight his mostly-closed eyes allowed.

Whoever was standing at his bed had dull grey fur and … silver armor? One of the Lunar Guard? But only Celestia, Luna or Cadence are supposed to be able to open this door.

So either Rosebush was mistaken and there was some sort of flaw in the ‘Ultimate Confinement’ cell, or Celestia had opened the cell and then left, which was very odd considering their relationship even before Twilight had become Celestia’s personal student.

Further musing was lost as a hoof touched Night Light’s jaw, trailing along the contours of his face before gently lifting turning his head so he was ‘looking’ straight up … and then he felt the soft tickle of another’s breath on his muzzle …

“Who are you?” Night Light snapped, his eyes opening to see … a Thestral Mare, with a small amount of fine lines at the corners of her eyes, vibrant purple eyes that were familiar despite them being wide and rolling from panic, and a pink scar across her muzzle that he recognised as having come from a Gryphon’s claws. “No … Thunderwing?”

“I … I just wanted to check on you!” The Commander of the Lunar Guard protested, trying to pull back, but finding her head locked into place by an invisible force. “Night Light! Is this your Empty Horn technique?”

“I’ll admit being woken by a pretty Mare is a nice compliment, but really, Thunder? After everything we’ve been through, done together, a lame excuse like ‘I just wanted to check on you’ is the best you can come up with?”

“We-we don’t have time for this, Celestia opened the cell, but we need to get you back to your house quickly …” Thunderwing explained, wriggling as she felt the tendrils of Night Light’s magic gripping her haunches firmly. “Night Light!”

“And what about Bluebone’s men? Have they been interrogated?” Night Light asked, releasing his grip on the Thestral, silently berating himself for being so aggressive. Well done, you hot-headed fool. Now she’s going to be even more awkward around you.

“That’s just the thing, Night. We need to use this cell to keep them safe. Last night, somebody with a lot of magic tried to stop their hearts last night with a curse. It almost worked, but there were a dozen Palace Guard Unicorns present who were able to nullify the curse before it could take full effect.” The middle-aged Thestral explained, taking a full three steps back from him before continuing. “Celestia forgive us, but right now, the lives of those Stallions weigh more than yours, regardless of your service. Their testimony is everything we need to crack open Bluebone’s defences, rip out all his dirty little secrets and open a gap in the Shadow Court’s ranks that might finally tip the scales in our favour, permanently.”

“And what of my life, Thunderwing? Or that of my wife? Or the rest of my friends down at the Bronze Leaf? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out removing all of us from the equation is the next step if the Shadow Court can’t silence their pawns. If they can’t squash the squealers, it’s time for the victims to vanish.” Night Light growled, rolling out of his bed and onto his hooves, filled with indignation at this turn of events. How many times did I lay my life on the line for this country, and this is how I am repaid? “Or does Celestia expect a dozen young privates from Palace Guards are going to be able to stop an organisation with as many connections and deep pockets as the Shadow Court? A group of vipers in our midst that even Sweet-Filly-Faust Celestia herself hasn’t been able to contain?”

“Celestia doesn’t expect Rosebush’s Guards can hold the line, no. Hen … hence I have been assigned as your personal guard, as have the patrons who were present at the Bronze Leaf at the time of the incident, whom have also been conscripted. These are your new orders.” Thunderwing shuddered and picked up a piece of paper from the ground with her bat-like wing, holding the limb at maximum stretch towards Night Light, who took it quickly and read it.

To the esteemed Night Light.

Would that these trying times were not yours, nor that I would have to ask this of you once again. As of the moment you read this, you are hereby reinstated to the 205th, field-captain rank, with all rights, responsibilities and privileges therein.

Your orders are simple. You are charged, with permission to use any means necessary short of treason or murder, to oversee the protection of yourself and Twilight Velvet until such time as the Crown releases you from your duty.

These orders do not give you carte blanche to leave Equestria’s borders, nor engage in anything other than defensive actions in regards to your mission without express orders from High Overlord Celestia.

Stand firm, and may Equestria embrace you.

High Overlord Celestia, Supreme General of the Equestrian Military.

“Oh … bollocks.” Night Light muttered, feeling all his righteous indignation and fury crumbling into despair. “Our Princess just conscripted me, didn’t she?”

“You do have the right to reject these orders, Night, but you and I both know that Celestia would only do this if things were dire. You earned your retirement when you bought enough time for Spud, myself and the remainder of your squad to get back across the border.” Thunderwing murmured, taking a hesitant step back towards him, then another, and then another, wrapping the trembling Stallion in her wings. “It’s going to be okay, Night. I’m … I’ll be there, every step of the way.”

“I just … I thought it was over, Thunder. All the cloak and dagger manure. Always looking over my shoulder. Always wondering if I’d be coming home on four hooves, three hooves or in a casket.” The Stallion whispered to his old friend, shaking with grief and frustration. “I’ll do it. I swore a blood-oath to Celestia and Equestria, and I’ll not break that oath … but if you see Celestia before I do, you tell her this for me.”

“If I get my shot at Bluebone and the Shadow Council while she’s still twiddling her hooves, I’m taking my shot, damn her orders. I will not let them hurt my family and friends, not again.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Captain, I need six flying chariots prepared, double the usual amount Pegasi to pull them, and load as many Unicorns as you can into the chariots, the strongest Unicorns we have, equipped for a highly magical confrontation.” Celestia barked the commands as she stalked through the Castle, cursing in her mind the Court and the pedantic whining of the Nobility.

Sunset Shimmer was back. And yet neither Shining Armor nor Cadence had noticed anything coming through the mirror, nor had any of their guards. Which meant that there had to be another connection to the world known as ‘Earth’ other than the enchanted mirror, and somehow the last Pony that Celestia wanted to see was back in her lands.

Even now, Celestia’s mind whirled with nightmarish visions of what her former student was plotting. Twilight’s story, that upon putting the Element of Magic on her brow, the Humanized Sunset Shimmer had turned into a literal fiend, with blazing hair, horns jutting from her head, bat-like wings and a long tail.

The differences between a Pony’s body and a Human’s body were many, but the transformation seemed too familiar, to similar to a menace that had not walked the lands of Equestria for over two thousand years, not since she and Luna had purged them from the world and sealed the entire race into Tartarus for their crimes.

Even more aggravating, Twilight had burned through most of the Dragon’s Fire stored in the Castle proper, and when the servants had rushed down to fetch more supplies from the basement, they had reported that the crates containing the spare Dragon’s Fire had all been looted and then resealed, made to look as if they were still unopened.

So in addition to a Succuponi running amok, and possibly bearing down on two Alicorns, who are weakened by my hooves, I now have somepony looting one of the most expensive and rarest substances in my kingdom! Celestia cursed in her mind. And without Dragon’s Fire to use as a component, I cannot use the flame-scroll spell to send a warning to Twilight!

“Princess Celestia, will the Earth Pony regiments be used?” General Rhinestone, a tall, bulky Earth Pony with a golden coat and two-toned silver-white mane, asked as he trotted alongside the other two Generals, Dart, commander of the Pegasi regiments and the youngest Pony in history to hold her rank, and Breach, commander of the Unicorn regiments and a seasoned veteran, sent several of their aides off to deliver the commands, while more rushed towards them with reports and responses from their various units.

“No. Much as I need more hooves on the scene, if my fears are correct, Earth Ponies would only be targets to Sunset Shimmer. I need your forces here, in Canterlot, ready to deploy to help evacuate Ponyville and the surrounding territories if we cannot capture and contain the threat.” Celestia explained, feeling some relief that none of her Generals seemed to feel the need to gloat about the Earth Ponies being left out of the fight. Thank Faust that I don’t have to deal with Unicorn Nobility here, at least! “Twilight Sparkle mentioned that Sunset Shimmer had been … transformed … by the Element of Magic into a dark entity when last they met. Expect her to be able to fly, and likely also be able to use Dark Magic. Approach with extreme caution, and let your soldiers know I am giving them full permission for lethal force if they feel the situation requires it.”

“Princess … this ‘Sunset’ is that big a threat?” Dart, a slightly smaller than average Pegasi with a bright red coat and orange mane and tail, asked softly, easily keeping up despite her much shorter legs. “I mean, you’ve just given your troops permission to use lethal force. She’s that dangerous you’d have us risk our image as gentle sentinels of the citizens, an image we've spent decades trying to make a reality?”

“Sunset Shimmer is at least as dangerous as Nightmare Moon, General Dart, if not more-so because of her personality. And unlike the Nightmare Moon situation, there is no Pony being possessed that we need to be wary of hurting when we contain the Monster.” The Princess explained, then sighed as they rounded a corner and found a gaggle of Nobles trotting towards them. “Gentleponies, you have my apologies, but We cannot stop to speak to you right now.”

“Princess, are we going to war with the Gryphons? What is this going to do to our economy?”

“Is it true that Commander Thunderwing has taken an extended leave of absence to care for a sick family member, now of all times?”

“Why are we sending soldiers out, your Highness? A military exercise to warn our neighbours of our might?”

“Princess, why is Discord being chased around the castle by a pink Pony with bottles of whipped cream?”

“We demand answers, Princess Celestia! Why have you cancelled the Day Court?”

“There are pressing issues that must be~!”

“SILENCE!” Celestia roared over the complaints of the courtiers, taking a grim satisfaction in how they instantly back-peddled and bowed. Honestly, after the last three packs of whining fools I sent running, you would think they would learn! “We have an emergency of great importance in Ponyville, a possible Dark Force is on the move and I cannot risk the Ponies there being hurt or worse! Now move, and spread the word that I am not to be delayed by anything! Lives hang in the balance!”

Please, don’t be too late, please. I can’t lose my sister again. I can’t lose my student! The Prophecies are bearing down on us now, and if we are not Five when the time comes …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Donning their illusory disguises once again, Twilight and Luna joined Applejack and Rarity and trotted towards the train-station, smoothing out their cover-story along the way in whispers.

Twilight and Luna would go by the names of Strawberry and Mint, given their coat colourations, and with the saddle-bags obscuring their Cutie Marks, nobody would be the wiser. Of course, if anyone brushed up against them, they would feel the ‘invisible’ wings hidden behind the illusions, and the jig would be up.

Thankfully, the train-station was almost deserted but for a handful of Ponies apparently waiting for the train for a trip to Canterlot, so ‘Strawberry’, ‘Mint’, Applejack and Rarity could sit at the far end of the station in peace and wait for the train’s arrival.

“Ya’ll’re sure about this? Trixie’s been the bearer of bad news every time she’s set hoof in town. We can jus’ send her back to Canterlot with a letter to some other Unicorn an’ get them to fix this spell-thingy that’s got her an’ her friend in such a tizzy, right?” Applejack muttered nervously, kneading her hat between her hooves.

“Applejack has a point, Tw … Strawberry. She does have a very … bad reputation in town. This could be a problem for us all, especially if somepony recognises her and tries to blame us for her mis-deeds.” Rarity added in, flicking a quick look around the train-station, little more than a large, wall-less shed built over a raised concrete platform with a small wooden stall that functioned as the ticket-booth. A far cry from Canterlot’s elegant, air-conditioned version, where trains from all over the continent passed through in an orderly, nightmarishly complex tangle.

“We’ve been over this already. Spike is back at the Library, with a letter asking for immediate assistance to be sent to Celestia via his own Dragon-flame the moment either Luna or I send a distress signal to the crystal ball in the library. The instant Trixie does something that might even remotely threaten the town, that we can’t handle, Celestia will know of within a minute’s time.” The disguised Alicorn Princess sighed and rubbed at her temples. Her friends’ caution was well deserved, but still, they were acting like Trixie was Sombra, not just another weird, quirky Pony, like what Ponyville attracted on a daily basis. “Now, unless we have to go over this again, Trixie should be showing up with her friend in some hessian cloaks …”

“Hessian?” Rarity squealed in distress, shoving a hoof into her own mouth to silence her diatribe against ‘sack-cloth’ garments.

“Ahem, yes, so she should be easy for us to spot, even if she is trying to move incognito. We’ll get Trixie and her friend back to the library, clear this up, and send her on her way with a minimum of fuss. Then Luna and I have some … shopping issues to take care of.”

“We need to get a new shower-head for the bathroom … and some mouthwash.”

“You are not going to let that go, are you?”

“You touched it with your mouth. If you ever wish to touch me with that mouth again, we’re getting you that mouthwash.”

“I was four, and that was years ago. Cooties cannot survive that long!”

“D’you unner’stan’ what they’re on about?” Applejack whispered, leaning in close to Rarity as ‘Strawberry’ and ‘Mint’ had a friendly bickering contest.

“I … uhm … have an idea, but I’d rather not dwell on it.” Rarity sighed, colouring slightly. “I am somewhat impressed that Twilight could break the shower-head … that is some impressive gripping pow … ugh, I did not just think about … ugh.”

Time passed slowly, awkwardly, especially as the choice of topics between the four Mares was constrained by the true identities of two of them, but Rarity managed to get Luna to talk about the ‘disgraceful’ tabloids of Canterlot, into which the disguised Alicorn waded with great gusto, venting about their outright slander against the Princesses and torrid obsession with conjecture about the elite of Equestria, with Applejack and Twilight either steering the conversation into safer waters or, trying to give Rarity space to avoid being dragged into trouble with her love of said tabloid magazines and more often than not asking ‘Mint’ to keep her voice down when the ‘Royal Canterlot Voice’ started to make an appearance.

Finally, the train steamed into view, and a handful of Ponies stepped off … none of them wearing hessian cloaks.

After a quick huddle to discuss their options, the four Mares tried to broach the subject of passengers still on the train with the Pony in-charge of collecting tickets, who seemed to take a perverse delight in being as obtuse as possible, having no idea that he was deliberately baiting two of the Princesses of the Kingdom, when the two cloaked Mares showed up, bickering and shoving as they tried to step out of the very last carriage ahead of each other.

“Ah, there they are … Ladies!” Applejack shouted, waving a hoof at the two cloaked Ponies, who started and looked around frantically before one of the ponies waved back quickly, the large cloak sliding aside to display a blue-furred leg.

Curiously, what started off as a walk turned into a race between the two cloaked Ponies as they once again attempted to put themselves in-front of the other, glaring at each other under the ragged cowls of their cloaks.

“Err … are you alright, Trixie?” Rarity asked, eyeing the two figures nervously. The letter had said the other Mare was Trixie’s friend, yet their behaviour was more like that of rivals, and bitter ones at that.

“Trixie is … is looking forwards to being rid of this curse, Miss Rarity.” The cloaked Pony muttered, the hood twisting left and right as she spoke. “Trixie apologies, but is Mist … Miss Twilight not here?”

“Ah … Twilight is waiting for you back at the library.” Luna lied, putting a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder when the disguised Mare opened her mouth to speak. “If you will please follow us?”

“Ugh, I can’t believe a Princess lives in a hick town like this. Let’s just get this curse removed.” Trixie’s companion muttered, either oblivious to or ignoring the five glares directed her way.

“Charming. However, I must say, the sooner the matter is resolved, the sooner you can leave.” Rarity replied, smiling warmly even as the words left her mouth, Applejack and Rarity moving to the sides of the two cloaked Ponies, ‘Strawberry’ taking the lead position, and ‘Mint’ following behind, trapping Trixie and her ‘friend’ between them.

If their meeting at the train-station had not been awkward and strained enough, the trip back to the Library was even worse, as most of Ponyville was up and about by then, and having two of the local celebrities with four strange Mares ensured that almost everypony came over to ask what was going on.

Trixie, thankfully, seemed extremely bashful and full of regret, and thus remained mute, while her companion seemed to be composed of nothing but snark and complaints. Luna and Twilight both had to adopt accents to avoid being recognized, accents that made them sound ridiculous, even to themselves.

“Ugh, finally, sanctuary.” Twilight muttered in a high-pitched voice, opening the door with her magic, and wincing as twin gasps of shock came from the two cloaked Ponies. “Uhm, damn, looks like the Kattian is out of the bag. Well, come on in, and let’s see what I can do to help … SPIKE! Cancel the letter, nothing has gone wrong yet.”

“Seriously? Oh wow, that’s great, Mayor Mare was saying she was going to deduct the next disaster from your salary, Princess or not.” Popping out from behind the library counter, Spike clattered over, wearing a pot on his head as a helmet and having pans strapped to his back and chest as a breastplate, a spatula clenched in one claw and a scroll in the other. “I’ve got the perfected spell-scroll ready in the basement … and got my gear moved out. Just in case.”

“Perfect, thanks Spike, that’s at least one thing that has gone right this morning. Okay, Rarity, Applejack, if you could see to the blinds? Ah … ‘Mint’? Would you … uhm …” Twilight met her ‘little brother’ halfway and gave him a hug, dropping her illusion as she did so, feeling oddly … threatened at the gasps coming from the two cloaked Mares as the tingle of the illusion fading washed over her body, revealing her true form.

“I will see to it there are no … problems … while you get to the bottom of what happened here, Twilight.” Luna offered, shedding her own illusion and giving her wings a stretch, the joints popping audibly, and when Trixie and her ‘Friend’ looked over to see what was making the noise, they had two very different reactions.

Trixie leapt about six foot into the air and came down in a kneeling position that was a half-step from outright grovelling, her hooded face pressed to the floor.

Her ‘Friend’ whirled around and took a half-step back, but otherwise gave no indication of reverence, or even acknowledgement of Luna’s royal status.

“Oh for Faust’s sake! Who is that?” The cloaked Pony shouted, her face hidden beneath her cowl but her tone was one of both irritation and surprise. “Are they just handing out Princess-dom to any old Mare now?”

Luna’s ears twitched, but her face remained blandly pleasant. Rarity and Applejack looked shocked, and Twilight’s mind whirled. Who was this Pony that did not know of Luna’s return over three years ago? It had been the talk of the nation for almost a year, and even now her reintroduction to the Kingdom was often brought up in Equestrian papers and magazines.

“Uhm … that is Princess Luna? Shepherd of the Night, Governess of the Stars, the Lunar Goddess?” Twilight offered after giving a nervous laugh, wondering if she was about to see her Lover turn this snarky, smarmy Mare into moon-cheese before her eyes.

“Huh … I remember hearing about somepony like that. Aren’t you supposed to be twelve foot tall and eat Foals whole?”

Luna’s ears laid flat against her skull, her face slipping to a stony frown.

Twilight wondered if murder-laws applied to pissed-off royalty.

Spike dove for Rarity and pushed her behind a reading couch, with Applejack in close pursuit.

Trixie wailed on the floor and slipped two legs out from under her cloak and placed them above her head.

“What?” The snarky Mare asked in a surprised tone, looking around the library at the cowering Mares and back to the insulted Immortal before her. “What?”

“Uhm … you’ve obviously been absent from Equestria for some time … Luna is not at all like the papers paint her to be … it’s somewhat of a sore subject.” Twilight explained, edging around the two cloaked Mares to stand by Luna’s side and wrap a wing around the Lunar Princess’s neck. “Perhaps you could … tell us your name?”

“Oh come on, Twilight, it’s not been that long since you last saw me.” The cloaked Mare scoffed, chuckling under her hood.

“Well, I can’t actually see your face…” Twilight muttered, blushing slightly. That voice though … it’s not possible.

“Oh, oh right. Sorry about that. Dodging Guards, you know how it is.” The Mare said after a short pause, lifting a gold furred leg up to push back her hood, revealing a gorgeous face with a banded yellow-and-red mane and emerald-green eyes.

“Sunset Shimmer?” Twilight shouted in surprise. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you … but the mirror … my brother … what?”

“It’s a long story … I’d love to fill you in … but first …” Sunset said, fluttering her eyelashes at Twilight and either ignoring or being oblivious to the glares from Luna and the prone Trixie. “Let’s deal with the spell that the Pathetic and Mediocre Trixie messed up first, hmm?”

Chapter 18 (Clop Light)

CHAPTER 18

Dappled Light was not one of the best Ponies that the Royal Guard could boast amongst their number. He was a Unicorn, but only an mediocre spell-caster, with mundane physical abilities, moderately talented at fighting and generally was about as bland, boring and normal as one could get to the point his Drill Instructor had literally torn his own mane out in despair of ever making Dappled Light ‘a real Guard-pony’.

His one specific, unique talent was hiding, specifically, a constant, unconsciously-generated magical aura that caused anyone or thing that looked at him would be so overwhelmed by his boring-ness that they’d forget they’d ever seen him within moments unless Dappled actively tried to make them notice him, and sometimes not even then. An odd talent for a Royal Guard, but it served him well at the Check-Point on the distant borders of Equestria, where the Unicorn could act as a hidden sentry and send messages to other, more talented Guards about dangerous entities trying to cross over into Pony territory.

Most of the time, he slacked off reading porn or writing bad fan-fiction, because most creatures, be they Ponies, Gryphons, Buffalo or other, were smart enough to put up with the nuisance of all that paperwork required by Equestria’s border-protection arm of the Royal Guard, than to be chased relentlessly like common criminals and either thrown into jail or marked with a magical brand and forcibly ejected from the country.

Truth be told, ‘Border-Guard’ was pretty much a dead-end job, but it paid enough for Dappled to do what he wanted.

Which was eat, sleep, breathe, buy porn, go drinking with a pretty Mare every now and again and write bad fan-fictions while on the clock.

So when Dappled found himself rubbing one out to a particularly stimulating picture involving a pair of pegasisters with strap-on horns that made them look remarkably like the Princesses, secreting himself in some bushes near the border with an open beer and a half-empty box of tissues at his side, he was quite surprised to find a black, chitin-covered head poke into the bushes he was hiding in at precisely the wrong moment.

The Changeling scout, on the other hoof, was equally surprised to receive a load of jism to the face from the startled Unicorn.

For several precious moment, the two stared at each other, or rather, Dappled stared at the Changeling, and the Changeling blinked rapidly to try and keep the sticky mess out of its eyes.

“Uhm … welcome to Equestria. Passport, please?” Dappled asked quietly, pushing his box of tissues to the Changeling.

And thus was fired the first shot of the second ‘Changeling Invasion’.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Despite each chariot being pulled by four Pegasi and being enchanted to self-levitate to reduce strain on the Ponies pulling them, Celestia kept on pulling ahead of the wing of Royal Guards, teeth grinding as she circled ahead, waiting for them to catch up.

It was intensely aggravating to have to wait for the Ponies, but alone, Celestia might not be able to defeat Sunset Shimmer, especially if she had turned into a Succuponi, at least not without a great deal of casualties and collateral damage to the surrounding area. And with Luna and Twilight currently in Ponyville, a fact that had only come to Celestia’s attention after a scroll from Spike had appeared mid-air and smacked into her face as she was flying, it became all the more important to move as fast as possible, as the very side-effects that their Sympathy caused them could make both Alicorns easy prey for a Succuponi.

If she were a superstitious Pony, Celestia would almost swear that the entire set-up seemed far too convenient for the Dark Force. Two of the only beings in Equestria today that could prove a true threat to a Succuponi, weakened and uniquely vulnerable to it’s talents in a town that had not even one single Guard to patrol it.

And Celestia didn’t even want to think about what would happen if Cadence came into contact with one of those fiends as was either charmed into serving the Succuponi or corrupted into one of them. With the powers of the Princess of Love at her command, Sunset Shimmer would be able to seduce and corrupt hundreds of Ponies at once, possibly even use the Crystal Heart to flood the aether with her foul taint and corrupt tens of thousands …

Which meant Celestia needed her Guards to distract the Succuponi and keep it occupied while she prepared the binding spells to shackle the monster … She could have teleported them all to Ponyville, but transferring thirty-six Unicorns, plus herself, plus the components for the binding spell which were naturally resistant to matter-transfer phenomena, would have consumed a significant portion of her magic and left them all disorientated for precious seconds, time in which a magically-attuned creature like a Succuponi would be able to sense their arrival and use the fiend’s innate charm-magic to meddle with their minds.

“Guards, can you not move faster?” Celestia shouted back, irritation apparent in her voice. “Every moment we delay, Ponies may be in danger!”

“Our apologies, your highness!” One of the leading Pegasi shouted back, sweat matting his coat and foam flecking his mouth. “Even with the augmentation spells cast us back in Canterlot, we are still dragging six ponies per chariot!”

“Very well! We’ll descend, give you a ten minute break and then one Unicorn from each chariot will refresh the augmentation spells!” Celestia shouted back, quickly spiralling down through the clouds, looking for a clearing large enough for the six chariots to be brought down safely.

This was the greatest agony of being an Immortal, an Alicorn. To have such vast, potent abilities, and to be so much stronger than everypony, yet when the time came that that strength was needed, fickle fate demanded that she still needed to rely upon the weak to protect the helpless.

Within a few minutes, Celestia had spotted and landed in a farmer’s field, pacing back and forth as she waited for the beleaguered Pegasi pulling the chariots to make their own landing, having to come down low and horizontally to bleed off the momentum of the chariots behind them, and when they landed, it was only the harnesses that shackled them to the chariots that kept the sweat-covered Ponies from collapsing to the ground.

“Of all the … why did nopony say you were so fatigued?” Celestia shouted, angry more with herself rather than her Ponies, as she trotted over and began to channel a recovery-spell over the sweaty, shaking Pegasi.

“We did … not want to … fail you.” One of the Pegasus gasped, tears welling up in his eyes, humiliation plainly written on his features.

“You gave us orders to conserve our magic, your majesty, else we would have channelled recovery-spells to the Pegasi throughout the flight.” A Unicorn spoke up, looking to the Pegasi lying on the ground, and the Unicorns who had arranged themselves in a circle around the chariots, and Celestia.

“I … forgive me, it … Gentle-Ponies, what I am about to say is a state secret, and it is why I am pushing you so hard today. This is to go no further than yourselves, on your honor as Royal Guards, on the blood-oath you swore to me when you enlisted.” Celestia sighed and sat on her rear, focusing the cool grass under her body to try and distract her mind from the battle to be had in Ponyville, waiting until all the Guards had sworn their agreement to her. “Princess Luna and Princess Twilight are dangerously close to where the ‘Dark Force’ you are coming with me to contain is likely to be found. The ‘Dark Force’, a Succuponi, is capable of not only completely charming any Pony it kisses, but can also corrupt Mares into more of its kind, and can drain a Stallion of their life force to power its magic once it has established a connection with them, often through a carnal contract or through a kiss.”

“Both of the Princesses are very weak right now, due to an accident with Twilight’s growing Alicorn powers that are causing the two a great deal of difficulty, and if the Succuponi can find them before we do, it might be able to corrupt them into Succuponies in their weakened state. Immortal, unkillable Succuponies with power over the Night and Magic itself. Can you imagine the destruction that such an event would cause? The number of Ponies that would be tortured and killed before I could … could seal my sister and student away in Tartarus?”

Sixty Stallions, twenty four Pegasi and thirty six Unicorns, all stared at Celestia with expressions ranging from confusion to outright horror.

“If we are to reach Ponyville soon, we will need to expend our magic now, something I had hoped to avoid as Succuponi are very sensitive towards magic of any kind, but it appears we are no longer able to maintain stealth if we intend to capture the beast before it can do any more harm.” Celestia explained, fanning her wings to blow air over the sweat-soaked Pegasi. “We will have two Unicorns cast a recovery spell for five minutes on two of the Pegasi pulling their chariot, the other two will cast a recovery spell for ten minutes on the other two Pegasi, and then the third pair of Unicorns will cast a recovery spell for another ten minutes on the first two Pegasi, each pair of Unicorns continuing to channel their spells for ten minutes at a time until we reach the outskirts of Ponyville. If we keep up the process of channelling for ten minutes and then resting and recovering for the same, we should be able to get to Ponyville within the hour.”

“Apologies, Princess Celestia, but using a recovery spell for that long will render the Pegasi all but comatose when we land and stop channelling the spells into their bodies.” One of the Unicorns spoke up, looking at the chariots, the Pegasi, then back to his Princess. “Even if we were to give them enough stimulants to keep them awake for twenty four hours, they would still fall asleep within minutes of the spells’ ending.”

“I am aware, but we have little choice. Once we land, the Pegasi will go find cover and wait with two Unicorns standing guard. The rest of us will move on hoof into Ponyville and try to find the Succuponi before it can attempt to run.” Celestia shook herself, wincing as she felt a twinge in her own wing-muscles. Assuming she made it through this fight, she’d be all but unable to move her wings at all come tomorrow. “The rest of the army is on standby, and if they do not receive a coded message from myself within three hours of our E.T.A. at Ponyville, then they will start commandeering trains and funnelling troops down to Ponyville to … to contain the situation.”

“Be aware, my little Ponies, this is not a training exercise or some sort of Royal Jest. You may be called upon today to strike down a Pony who has been charmed by the Succuponi. Mares. Stallions. Elders. Foals. Any Pony may end up being your enemy today. Do not allow anypony or anything to touch your face while we are hunting the Succuponi. Do not accept any food or drink until the beast is contained within my binding circle. And know that I am so sorry that circumstances force me to drag you into this fight at my side.”

“Princess Celestia!” The Guard shouted, saluting her proudly, even the Pegasi that lay on the ground, pride evident on their faces. “Princess Celestia! It is our honor to serve!”

And in the back of Celestia’s mind, a grim little voice asked just how many of these Stallions might fall before the Beast was captured.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Long after the Royal Guards had left, piling back into their chariots and followed the Goddess back into the sky, a sun-bleached yellow-mane poked up out of the thick grass, followed by a pale green Earth Pony Stallion whose eyes reverently looked in the direction they had gone.

To Ponyville. The Goddess had gone to that den of Unbelievers to save them from a Demon-Mare of legend, right out of the Chronicles of the Sun that the Sisters always carried around.

Clutching a battered bronze likeness of Celestia’s head and neck that hung around his neck on a simple leather thong, the farmer whispered a prayer to the Goddess, and rushed towards the small village where he lived.

The Word had to be spread. The Sisters had to know that the Goddess was finally spreading her Light throughout the land once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Uhm … little … little too close, girls.” Twilight muttered, feeling her flesh creep as Trixie and Sunset pressed in on either side of her.

She had expected tears, or angry recriminations, or even cold politeness, not this … this clingy behaviour. It reminded her of how Rarity’s cat, Opal, would get when it overdosed on catnip-treats and would demand to be petted and fussed over by it’s owner.

Thankfully, Luna ‘saved’ Twilight again, her magic illuminating the two cloaked Ponies as they were levitated away from Twilight, who took the opportunity to race down the stairs into the basement, blushing furiously.

The ‘false’ estrus that the Sympathy with Luna had caused was making Twilight’s head a little ‘fluffy’, but nothing she felt that she couldn’t handle, but at the same point, having two Ponies all but rubbing themselves along her flanks, especially given the emotional side-effects of her ‘Flash’ this morning, was doing a number on her rational thought-process.

The sooner I can find the correct counter-spell and get those two out of my house, the better. Twilight thought to herself, feeling somewhat guilty about having such thoughts about others after entering into this somewhat-but-not-quite-relationship with Luna, but the bizarre behaviour of the two Mares filled her with a sense of unease that she could not easily identify.

That, and Luna looked fit to burst with jealousy, and Applejack and Rarity were too busy dealing with a terrified Spike, who had taken one look at Sunset Shimmer’s face, shrieked in terror and clawed his way up the staircase after immolating the scroll they had prepared in-case Trixie had been a threat, sending it winging through the aether towards Celestia.

And quite frankly, Twilight would have welcomed Celestia’s presence right now, even if it was to scold her student for being overly cautious and for teleporting Pinkie Pie without the Party-Pony’s permission.

The feeling of threat and danger that she felt, from the very same place where Celestia had both drawn out and pushed in the swirling purple magic from the core of Twilight’s being, was only growing stronger. It was a nameless dread that welled up inside her, and the more she was around Trixie and Sunset, the stronger that dread grew.

Trotting down the stairs and rushing down to the various equipment in the basement, ranging from the devices she had attempted to use to measure Pinkie’s ‘Pinkie Sense’ to the prototypes for the automated apple-picker that had almost gotten the entire Apple-clan chasing after her with torches and pitchforks.

There, on a steel gurney, was the ‘perfected’ spell-scroll, wrapped with a dark purple silk ribbon and sealed with a red wax stamp that Twilight broke swiftly, holding the scroll in-between her fore-hooves, leaving her horn free to cast a spell … either a counter-spell for Trixie and Sunset, or a teleportation spell to get the Tartarus out of the basement if the two Mares tried to glomp her again.

“You two will behave and treat Twilight with the respect and restraint that a Princess of Equestria deserves, or so help me …” Luna growled, her wings extended so they brushed the walls of the stairwell and blocked any attempt to get around her, leading the two bickering, cloak-clad Mares down into the basement with a furious expression on her face.

Curiously, behind them came Applejack and Rarity, on the latter’s back clung Spike, looking pale but resolute, his trusty spatula clenched tightly in one claw and the cast-iron pot back on his head.

“Alright, now before this gets any weirder … what spell, exactly, is affecting you two?” Twilight said loudly, hoping that she sounded strong and confident, not wary and creeped-out.

“That is … Trixie believes it is several spells. Trixie and … that Pony … fought over the Scroll, and were casting spells from it at each other, until we both cast the same spell and … and there was an explosion.” Trixie offered first, looking very distraught. “Trixie has tried many times to dispel the magic, but the final spell blocks Trixie from affecting herself with magic.”

“The Show-Nag has the right of it. We have both attempted to reverse the spell on our own, with no effect.” Sunset added, shooting a haughty look at Trixie. “Ever since, I have found myself shackled to this Mare against my will. We can only cast spells on each other now, and if we are apart for too long, or drift apart too far, we suffer horrible physical symptoms until we are reunited.”

“That … sounds like none of the spells I’ve translated from Weeaboo’s scrolls.” Twilight said after a minute of silent, and frenzied thought. “Okay, we’ll go through the spell-scroll, you tell me which spells each of you cast, and then we’ll try to figure out which spells are malfunctioning or have merged together, and try to unravel them. But … can we lose the cloaks? You don’t need them anymore, there’s nopony here to see you but us.”

“Does Trixie have to? It is … embarrassing.” Trixie whimpered, but when Luna glared at her, the blue Unicorn bowed her head in defeat. “Very well. Sunset, on three?”

“Ugh, does everything have to be dramatic with you? Fine, on three.”

“One … two … three!” The two Mares said together, levitating each other’s cloaks off and revealing themselves to the other Ponies and Dragon assembled in the library’s basement.

For several seconds, the world seemed to hold it’s breath as the hessian cloaks fluttered to the ground, unheeded, as the Ponies stared at the sight before them.

“Oh by Celesita's beard, it’s hideous!”

“Wha’ the heck are those things?”

“AAUUUGH! I’m never going to be able to read my comics again!”

“By my Moon, what is that!”

“Oh, you’re … wearing Sailor Fuku outfits. Okay. Okay, considerably less horrific than what I was expecting.” Twilight muttered as her friends and family cowered from the ‘horror’ before them.

Both Trixie and Sunset wore the ancient combat-uniforms of the mystics of the Neighponese. Just like Pinkie’s ‘spell’, the garments covered the front of the Ponies quite well … but the pleated ‘skirts’ failed to do more than advertise the size of their flanks, and the thigh-high socks looked uncomfortably tight on their hind-legs.

“Auuuugh! Those colours! Those designs! They clash with your manes, they don’t fit your contours, my poor eyes, it burrrrrrrrrrrrrrns!” Rarity squealed, fleeing up the stairs in tears.

“Ah’ll admit they … aren’t the most practical garments ah’ve seen, but why are they the problem?” Applejack asked after Rarity’s wailing, and the slamming of the library’s door had faded away.

“Because these are what makes it all but impossible for us to cast spells now!” Sunset Shimmer snapped angrily.

“Ah, I think I see … there, that's the problem.” Twilight muttered, unrolling the scroll until she came across the spell in question, grimacing at the thought of trying to dispel it. “The problem with the Fuku armor-spell is that it was intended to be worn by the caster, not another Pony, and would function as not only physical protection, but would also cover its wearer in a weak anti-magic field that would diminish incoming spells, both benign and hostile, without crippling the spell-caster’s own magic.”

“Y-yes. Trixie has tried cutting the garments off, but no sooner does Trixie make a cut than the cloth will heal itself.” The blue Unicorn sighed and brushed a hoof over her blouse.

“Yes, that’s one of its features. Apparently the ancient Neighponese battle-mages were regularly stripped down during battle against the Yokai, and demanded that feature be included to preserve their modesty.”

“Wait, you mean to say the robes are like armor?”

“Not quite, Luna. The garments are tough to be certain, but they can be cut, pierced, burnt or abraded away, but they will always repair themselves within moments. They are, however, tentacle-proof.”

“Tha’s … an oddly specific defence, Sugar-cube.”

“Apparently it was the most common threat to their persons in that era.”

“Uh, kinda scared to ask, but how are they tentacle-proof?” Spike asked, looking quite flushed around the face.

“Essentially, as soon as something that fits the physical description of ‘tentacle’ touches the garment, it casts a short-range electrical discharge spell which should force the muscles within the limb to forcibly contract and recoil from the wearer.” Twilight explained, casting a small spell on the ground in-front of Trixie and Sunset, where a small black tendril appeared and snapped towards Trixie’s leg.

Before the blue Unicorn could protest, the magical ‘limb’ wrapped around her fore-leg … and shrivelled away to nothing as Trixie’s Fuku-armor glowed and sent a snapping arc of orange magic at the offending limb.

“Ah! It thought so! The Fuku-spell is running off the magic of the other Pony! It’s a classic short-circuit scenario!” Twilight shouted happily, all but dancing on the spot.

“Trixie is … glad you know how to fix this?” Trixie said, staring at the floor where the tentacle had emerged, then Twilight, then her own leg, shuffling nervously on the floor.

“We’re going to have a long talk about who uses the tentacles in this household, Twilight.” Sunset remarked in a saucy voice, again oblivious to the laser-guided glare of Luna.

“Well, sort of. First of all, the Fuku is a cast-and-forget spell that constantly drains a small amount of magic from the caster to maintain it's form and function. So we’re going to need each of you to throttle your magic, and then we have to gradually wear the spell down until its remaining charges have been expended, and then … uhm what other spells did you cast on each other? If they’ve been trapped on you since the Fuku-spell was cast …” Twilight’s enthusiasm tapered off to wary interest, eyeing the two Mares who seemed, other than their outfits, to be relatively normal-looking, even if Sunset was wearing a black cape on her back, which blended almost perfectly with her black-and-red Fuku.

Odd. Why would she wear one cape over another? It … doesn’t look like it belongs on a Fuku … or does it? I’m sure Spike could answer that for me!

“Trixie is ashamed to admit, but Trixie does not remember the spells, only that they were painful, and that Sunset looks ridiculous with spikey hair.” Trixie mumbled, giving an apologetic smile to Twilight, which grew into a luminous expression of rapture when Twilight smiled back, thoroughly creeping Twilight out in the process.

“After we cast this … phu-kyu spell on each other, the Spell-Scroll burst into flames from all the magic being used on it.” Sunset Shimmer muttered, glaring at Trixie before coughing suddenly. “Uhm, could I get a glass of water?”

“Ya’ll fine if I get it? Kinda … don’ want to leave Twi all alone wit’ no magic backup, in-case something goes … wrong.” Applejack asked, waiting for both Luna and Twilight to nod before rushing up the stairs, leaving Luna, Spike and Twilight to ‘guard’ the two cursed Mares.

“Okay, so … no idea what spells you cast before the Fuku came into play, so we could be dealing with a great deal of magical back-lash when these spells are released.” Twilight muttered, looking around the room in thought. “Okay, nothing down here should be affected, since the spells were intended for living beings, and Spike, Luna and myself all have strong magical defences. We’ll have to keep Rarity and Applejack upstairs, however …”

“Uh, Twilight? Sorry for asking, but shouldn’t the other spells have faded away by now?” Spike asked, raising a claw into the air to attract Twilight’s attention.

“The … gecko … has a point. It’s been three weeks since we found at scroll, surely the spell-effects would have faded by now?” Sunset added, looking … perturbed.

“Under normal circumstances, yes. But the Fuku-spell creates magical armor that can ‘repel’ magic. And since the Fuku-spell was cast in such an odd fashion, it stands to reason that the spell-effects that it was layered over the top of are still in effect, just repressed and trapped beneath the Fuku-spell, just as it reflects spells cast from other sources.” Twilight tapped the scroll, rolling it out further with a hoof as she explained. “Autonomous spell-armor of this sort always has that flaw. Unlike spell-negation effects that are cast with a will behind them, like the spell-shields my brother uses, the autonomous spell-negation in the armor works to repress and reject any ‘foreign’ magic, both on its outer surface and on its inner one, because it can’t tell the difference! And since you two botched the casting so badly, it stands to reason that there’s a high chance that the spells you were flinging at each other could have been trapped under the Fuku, stuck in a feedback-loop with the Fuku-armor stopping them from fully activating, like steam trapped in a pressure-cooker.”

“So in other words, when we manage to get the Fuku-armor off, we could be looking at a Spell-Storm?” Luna asked, eyeing the two cursed Mares warily. “And since neither one recalls exactly what spells they cast …”

“Yes. And don’t forget, these are body modification spells. So we’re going to need to prepare for this with a full containment circles, stasis spells ... ugh, this is going to take hours.” Twilight groaned, feeling the fuzzy headache that had been plaguing her all morning getting worse. “Alright, the first things we’re going to need is some chalk for the circles …”

Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

“Gentleponies.” Bluebone said calmly, sweeping into the facility, hidden deep below the Canterlot School for Gifted Unicorns without warning, causing the Unicorns present to drop what they were doing and bow immediately, leading to several score sheets of paper and cups of coffee falling to the ground.

“Sir! You should have told us you were coming!” One of the Unicorns stammered, bowing behind the massive hardwood reception counter that dominated the room.

“That defeats the purpose of a ‘surprise inspection’.” Bluebone resonded in a pleasant voice, but still the Unicorn that had spoken up flinched as if struck.

One did not question the Chairman of the Shadow Council, even innocently. More than one Pony had found themselves in an unenviable position after such a gaffe.

“Y-yes sir, my apologies. Ah … the Council is waiting for you on the third level, room thirty-four.” The Unicorn bowed and pointed to one of the double-doors that lined the walls. “In case the Guards did not let you know, sir, Councilmembers Smoke Stacks and Salty Rogers have invoked the crisis act. We’re currently running with full magic dampeners, so please do not attempt any form of magic beyond telekinesis.”

“Hmph. Why am I not surprised that those two would jump the moment something goes wrong.” Bluebone muttered out loud, then nodded and moved through the doors indicated, the Unicorns in the ‘lobby’ waiting several seconds before breathing a sigh of relief, the unfortunate Unicorn who had questioned the Chairman curling up into a ball beneath his desk.

Lab-coats, guard uniforms, all of them worn by Unicorns, greeted Bluebone’s eyes. Cold, cream-coloured sterile corridors and doors of polished steel, lit by enchanted crystals that produced harsh white light surrounded him. The faint thrum of the magic-dampeners grew stronger and stronger the deeper he went, arcane engines built to mask the facility from scrying attempts and to muffle the abilities of Unicorns to the bare minimum.

Hundreds of thousands of bits, and decades of work, had gone into this facility. Hundreds of Ponies bribed into performing the work and then bribed again into silence, or ‘relocated’ if the work they had done was too sensitive to let slip. The entire facility had been built at the same time as the school above it had been by Bluebone’s paranoid ancestors, building the school both to further the glory of Unicorn supremacy as well as to provide a viable cover-story for the massive amounts of dirt, rock and resources being shifted to and from the site, the cold, sterile rooms and corridors intended to serve as a bunker for the Shadow Council and their families to take refuge in during a possible civil war with Celestia, until Bluebone’s grandfather, Bluelocks, had found something world-shattering in one of his ‘diplomatic’ visits to Gryphonia.

A small, tattered book, written in Celestia’s own hand. A diary looted from the Castle of the Two Sisters by a Gryphon tomb-raider centuries ago, and being peddled by a street-vendor who had no idea the treasure he was trying to sell.

It had taken several years, but Bluelocks had hired the finest translators and code-breakers and put them to work, unlocking the code and revealing that Celestia was rushing to prepare Equestria for some great and terrible meeting against the ‘Unspoken Foe’, and that the nation required at least five Princesses to match the power of this foe, one for each of the Five Tribes.

And the revelation of a ‘Fifth’ Tribe had shaken the Shadow Council to its foundations. For all their work against Celestia, they had still considered her one of their kind, an offshoot of the Unicorn Tribe surely, but fundamentally one of them.

That Celestia’s only blood-tie to the Unicorn Tribe was her children, that she belonged to some long-vanished indigenous Tribe, that her claim to Equestria superseded anything the Unicorns could counter, had severed whatever bonds the Council might have grudgingly claimed to the Solar Monarch. Celestia was an outsider, and had no right to stop the Unicorn Tribe from claiming the destiny that was, and is, rightfully theirs.

Yet the Prophecy that had been found in the diary still remained as great a threat to Equestria as Princess Celestia’s continued rule. It would not serve the Shadow Council’s interests if they freed the nation from it’s inept ruler only to have this ‘Unspoken Foe’ wipe all of Ponykind out afterwards.

Five Princesses at least were required to stand against the Foe, according to the Prophecy, yet the thought of leaving their beloved Equestria in the hooves of some misbegotten relic from the past galvanized the Shadow Council as nothing else had, quelling internal disputes and feuds and uniting Ponies whose families had never had any interactions with a common purpose beyond their petty grievances with Celestia.

If the Princess who led their nation was inherently unfit for the role, then they would make one who was, and either replace Celestia directly, or wait until after the Unspoken Foe was defeated and then unseat Celestia in the aftermath. Yet despite countless sacrifices to the cause, nothing had worked.

Bloodlines had been catalogued, trying vainly to cross-breed Celestia’s descendants to force an Alicorn birth had only resulted in normal children despite taxing magical rituals and staggering mortality rates amongst the offspring. Grafting procedures had only created horrid monsters whose very bodies rebelled against themselves. Attempts to ‘grow’ Alicorns from donated egg and sperm samples and rare physical samples from Celestia, normally hairs taken from her brushes, had refused to produce anything but failure, the ‘divine’ quality of Celestia’s own matter steadfastly refusing to combine with the other materials.

Samples of hair, and even blood, from Luna and Cadence had been rejected from being used to create the Council's successor to Celestia's throne, the former for being a ‘beastial’ Thestral, the latter for being a ‘cloud-headed’ Pegasus, but tests had proven that both Alicorns possessed the same ‘divine’ quality that prevented hybridization as Celestia herself. Curiously, however, the hairs from a much younger Cadence would have proven fruitful, but their age, as well as the unsanitary condition of their storage, had rendered them impossible to use in any of the Projects.

Only a freshly ‘ascended’ Alicorn’s essence lacked the ‘divine’ quality that thwarted the Council’s efforts to breed a Princess of their own, and it was painfully apparent that Twilight Sparkle, while naïve of both life and politics, was far too entrenched in Celestia’s tyranny to ever consider joining the Shadow Council’s noble work. Much like her family, Twilight was a willing traitor to her own kind.

Even armed with precious samples of Twilight’s hair, hoof-shavings and horn-scrapings, the twisted mind of Professor Beaker had only produced a single abomination, although his work was the closest the Shadow Council had even come to true success, even if his materials had come at such a high cost to the Council

“Sir, this way!” A pair of guards flanked the doorway he had been directed to, the only external hint that this was something more than another room of cells or operating rooms the small black numbers above the door and the lack of a biohazard symbol.

Nodding wordlessly, Bluebone entered the room, repressing the urge to roll his eyes as the Shadow Council, three-dozen Stallions and Mares, all Unicorns and all devoted to the cause, stared at him with annoyance written clearly on their faces.

“Bluebone. So glad you could join us.” One muttered, shuffling several pieces of paper between his hooves. “I take it your trip to Gryphonia was another waste of time?”

“On the contrary, Almond, it was a perfect waste of time in the eyes of all involved, and that’s exactly what we needed. The zealots amongst the Gryphons are nicely riled up by my ‘heinous’ acts and as furious as they are at how easily The Pretender cowed their military leaders, I have little doubt we’ll see a revolution soon enough, which will distract The Pretender from our own coup. Behind the scenes, I have secured a contract for our members to be the sole middle-men for the diamond trade between the Gryphons and ourselves, which will nicely fund our experiments here and our other projects across Equestria, and I have an excellent alibi for this … debacle that I’ve heard is being pinned on me.”

There was silence but for the rustling of papers all throughout the room as the other Shadow Council members re-read their reports.

“Yes. the 'debacle' of six mercenaries attacking in plain sight, claiming to have been hired by yourself … strange, is it not, Bluebone?” Another Unicorn, a Mare this time, asked softly. “It strikes myself as very odd, considering how subtly we have conducted our operations for the past few decades, very odd that such a blatant and ham-fisted approach should be taken. And all of this done without the Council’s express permission too. Even the Chairman must have the Council's permission before engaging in such actions.”

“My dear Emerald, if I wanted that cur, Night Light, removed from this world, it would be in the comfort of his own home, forcing him to watch impotently as that novelist-whore wife of his was violated to death before his eyes, before I personally dispatched every single last Pony who had dared to call him friend before his eyes. Only when I had completely, utterly broken him and ruined everything he held dear beyond repair would I grant him the mercy of oblivion.” Bluebone countered. “If I wanted Night Light brought before me, I would not have relied upon useless Mercenaries, I would have called upon our own forces, and had him ambushed on the way back from that filthy little tavern he frequents so often. Quickly, silently and invisible to the Guards, just like all of our … acquisitions for the good Professor’s experiments.”

“So you are stating that you did not, in fact, hire the Mercenaries? Perhaps your son, Blueblood …” A third Unicorn from the back-rows asked loudly.

“Do not refer to that … that pansy as my son.” The large white Stallions snapped, letting his anger reveal itself like a lash that silenced the other Unicorn. “Would that Clarinet had not died whelping my daughter, I might have had a worthy heir. As it stands, now I only have that popinjay to provide me with something I might mould to serve our great and noble cause. Besides, he knows perfectly well what will befall his precious collection if he crosses me a second time. No, I suspect this was a play by a Noble House outside of our own order, some foolish family who thinks they can earn Celestia’s favour by trying to humiliate one of her most outspoken critics.”

“And you do not believe one of us would have done so?” An unseen Unicorn asked, the silence of the room total and crushingly complete in the aftermath of that question.

“We are, all of us, gathered here for the sole purpose of elevating our Tribe to its true position, that of leadership over the flighty Pegasi and the dim-witted Mud-Ponies.” Bluebone said, smiling warmly with cold eyes up at his ‘allies’. “United we must stand, for divided we shall fall, and our great nation will forever more remain under the hooves of an unworthy Princess. Only together, only as one mind, one body, can we remove this taint from our land and restore the land to its rightful rulers. Only together, can we save Equestria from its Princess.”

“Be that as it may, Bluebone, we’re still going to need to tread very carefully. You know that the Pretender has been looking to destroy the Council since she became aware of our existence.” Another Unicorn spoke up, an unlit cigarette hanging out the corner of her mouth. “You know what we will have to do if Celestia puts you in that prison of hers. No leaks, no matter the cost. Were those not your own words when your father was imprisoned?”

“And they are words I charge this Council with today. If by some act of tyranny that Celestia manages to put me behind bars, I expect this Council to do whatever it takes, to take whatever steps are necessary to ensure I do not expose them.” Bluebone said, his face not betraying a single hint of the anger he felt, but instead a mask of calm acceptance. “No one pony is too valuable to risk in this endeavour, as I have proven multiple times to this Council. Speaking of which, how goes the Project?”

“With the acquisition of a large cache of Dragon’s Fire from Celestia’s own cellars, Professor Beaker swears he can create a teleportation matrix that can … can finish the process of uniting our three Eves together without the risk of rejection that the previous attempts suffered from.” Another Unicorn up in the back-row piped up, levitating a stack of papers up to his eye-level. “I … don’t understand most of this egg-head stuff, but he claims that the hairs our agents recovered from the Traitor-Princess’s room have been broken down into Alicorn Essence without the ‘rejection agent’ and stored appropriately, and that he believes that if the infusion is performed while the ‘Eves’ are being combined inside the Teleportation matrix, which will be fuelled by Dragon’s Fire, and thus our Unicorn Eve will be unable to disturb the matric. Without her … interference … what comes out should be a viable incubation device for future Princesses.”

“Nnngh. Let us hope it doesn’t end like his last attempt. I can still see that … thing … crawling out of the teleportation matrix.” A Unicorn muttered, and was joined by several others voicing opinions of disgust.

“The attempt to turn an adult Pony into a Princess by trying to mimic Twilight’s own ascension ended in failure, to be certain, but this time we’re attempting the long-term route.” A third Unicorn spoke up, obviously one of the ‘egg-heads’. “Since we can’t transmute limbs onto a Pony and make them an Alicorn without both host-body and limbs violently rejecting each other, and attempts to artificially induce Alicornism into the Bloodlines has failed, our only remaining option is to use fresh Alicorn Essence from Twilight Sparkle and attempt to use it, and a living, artificial Alicorn ‘womb’ to birth the Princess this Kingdom needs to rule it.”

“Assuming that this convoluted mess of a plan even works, how do we intend to keep control of an Immortal?”

“Wouldn’t charm-spells woven into the Alicorn from birth work?”

“We have no idea if the very divine nature of the bloodline would allow that to happen. Our best bet is to raise the new Princess ourselves, and ingrain loyalty to us as it’s primary directive.”

“You are assuming, of course, that it won’t rebel like all teenagers do and pursue it’s own agenda!”

“Not if we apply the right … pressures … during it’s childhood. Make it fear us, and that fear will subconsciously control it’s actions towards us.”

“Yes, make the all-powerful being feel hatred and fear towards us, nothing can possibly go wrong with that plan!”

“It worked for my children! At least I am attempting to continue my bloodline, rather than mounting the rumps of other Stallions!”

“You have to admit that he has a point, old bean. Your children are either shrinking violets who flinch at the first sign of anger or have rebelled against you entirely and side with the Princesses just to spite you. We need a Princess that will fight when we want her to fight, and not a moment longer. Your method would only give us a rebellious weapon that could blow up in our faces at any moment.”

Taking care to keep himself from grinning, Bluebone walked between the rows of bickering Unicorns, having once again united them in purpose against Celestia, and just as importantly, making them work with him at their head, as was only right as the only pure-blooded descendant of Princess Platinum within their ranks.

Soon, Celestia would be deposed and replaced with a Princess of truly Noble blood, and Equestria would flourish, as it was always meant to, under the benevolent guidance of the Unicorns.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“…okay. So that’s the final rune-circle. Okay. Alright, now comes the creepy part.” Twilight groaned, feeling her vertebrae pop as she stretched her neck out. “Sunset, Trixie, I need you to focus on your magic and clamp down on any and every spell you’re casting. Try to throttle the magic, so that I can get rid of the Fuku.”

“Trixie is unsure about this …”

“Just remember, Twilight, turn-about is fair play …”

“Ye-e-e-e-es, as I said, creepy part.” Twilight blushed slightly, taking a step back from Sunset Shimmer. Trixie was nervous, which was normal when confronted with a spell bearing as many negative connotations as a tentacle-field spell, but Sunset seemed positively … delighted to have the spell cast on her. Creeeeeeeepy!

“Twilight, is it really necessary that I sit here?” Luna chipped in, looking both bored and irritated inside her own circle at Twilight’s side, smears of chalk-dust on her lips and hooves. “Should I not be seated at the stair-well in-case somepony tries to escape?”

“Normally, yes. But the tentacle spell isn’t the most … discriminating spell in the world. I’d rather have you here, so I only need to focus on one barrier spell, rather than have you get caught up in the tentacle-field.”

“And anypony that comes down the stairs?”

“They’re on their own, but I will pay for their therapist bills.” Twilight quipped, her horn flaring with her personal magical aura, copied by the ground around Trixie and Sunset, which began to turn black, a slick, latex-plastic black that began to sprout dozens of long, slender tentacles that waved in the air for several seconds, growing longer and thicker, before bending down to caress the Ponies in their midst.

Moments later, the air was filled with the smell of ozone and the yelps of startled Ponies as flashes of electricity lashed out from their Fuku-armor, vaporizing the tentacles that had touched them, even as more tentacles began to sprout from the field of black latex that surrounded Trixie and Sunset.

“Oooh, the suit tingles when it does that!” Sunset cooed, shuddering with an ecstatic look on her face, while Trixie squeaked and yelped with every flash.

“Does she have to do that?” Twilight muttered, channelling more power into her spell, while Luna merely glared flatly at Sunset, her eyes flicking from the golden Unicorn’s face to her black cloak and back again.

With every surge of power, the field of tentacles regrew, yet the Fuku-armors lost their lustres. After the seventh assault, one of the tentacle managed to physically touch Trixie, making the blue Unicorn shudder before it was disintegrated, and on the tenth assault, Sunset was actually stripped of her skirt, with only a few weak arcs of power trailing across the tentacles, doing little more than making them twitch.

“Twilight, I think that’s enough…” Luna whispered, not taking her eyes off of Sunset, who was lewdly nibbling on the tip of a tentacle, giving Twilight a smouldering look. “There’s something very wrong here.”

“You mean aside from Sunset acting like … well, us a few days ago?” Twilight muttered, cancelling her spell and sighing with relief as the black latex tentacles slowly dissipated into purple mist. “Okay you two, strip out of your Fuku’s now, you should be able to remove them without any problems now that their magic has been drained away.”

“Maybe you could come over here and help me?” Sunset winked, slinking out of her coat and shirt in a way that made a ball of heat swell up inside Twilight’s stomach, even as the coldness and sense of danger swelled in her chest.

“Trixie is … very glad you did not use that spell on Trixie the last time, Mist … Miss Twilight.” Shaking like a wet Diamond Dog, Trixie all but ripped herself out of her Fuku, grabbing hold of the offending garments with her teeth and manually pulling them off her body, rather than risk using her magic.

Disrobed, the two Unicorns shot each other matching glares of contempt before their bodies rippled, and Luna and Twilight had a moment of blissful silence, before they found themselves latching onto each other and screaming as a horrific transformation took place before them.

Trixie and Sunset distorted. Their eyes bulged, their bodies shrank, their manes and tails ran every spectrum of the rainbow and exploded in length, strange creatures appeared before them waving magical wands of awkward design, warped devices of unfathomable purpose burst into being and then exploded into magical sparks, and right before it seemed the two would deform into tiny, stocky caricatures of their original beings, the two snapped back to normal size before collapsing on the ground, the chalk-circles that had been made to redirect and neutralize as many different types of spells as Twilight could think of bursting into clouds of chalk and ash that drifted through the air.

“Twi? We heard screamin’, wha’s goin’ on down there?” Applejack hollered from the second storey of the library, where she, Rarity and Spike were hunkered down in a protective spell-circle of their own.

“It’s over! Oh dear Faust, it’s over! Just stay up there till Luna or I come to get you!” Twilight yelled back, muttering an apology to Luna as the two Alicorns disentangled themselves. “Uh, manure, I think I messed up.”

“What are you … oh no.” Luna asked, looking to where Twilight was pointing. Lying face-down and breathing shallowly, Trixie’s tail had somehow transformed into a long, leonine tail tipped with a small tuft of the same silvery hair, and Sunset sported a similar tail, as well as cloven hooves of brass and two large, black, bat-like wings where her small black cloak had once been, the golden Unicorn’s closed eyes twitching as she struggled to recover from the shock of her bout of involuntary transformations. “Twilight, reinforce your barrier, and drop a second one across the stairs. I will be wrapping us both in anti-enchantment wards, and under no circumstances are you to let either of these two Mares kiss you or look into your eyes.”

“Okay, creepy and oddly specific.” Twilight muttered, channelling more power into her shielding spells as she felt the warm, tickling sensation of warding runes being traced with magic onto thin air and placed onto her body. “They’re just still warped from Weeaboo’s spells, right?”

“Mayhap, but I would prefer to not take chances. This … Sunset Shimmer looks much like an ancient foe of my sister and I, a breed of mortal Fiend known as a Succuponi, the creation of a coven of embittered Mares during the first few centuries of Celestia and my reign as Princess of Equestria. When we refused to allow the Coven to raid nearby villages for Stallions for their rituals, rituals that often ended in the rape, dismemberment and devouring of the unfortunate Stallions they captured, they called upon the powers of Tartarus and attempted to transform themselves into Princesses to wrest control of the lands from us. Needless to say, their plan failed, but they caused immense damage to the Ponies of that era before we were able to isolate their weaknesses and banish their entire, debased race to Tartarus.”

“Ugh … but Sunset did transform into some sort of Fiend back on Dirt, I mean Earth. And it … sorta looks like … what she changed into. But when we Harmonized her, she changed back …” Twilight murmured, turning pale at Luna’s words. More of this ‘dark history’ Luna kept hinting about.

“Succuponi can easily use illusions to assume the form of whatever their victim desires most, and they possess the ability to enthral the weak-minded through eye-contact. They can also establish a life-link through a kiss or a … carnal contract, through which they can command the victim as a puppet to their will, and if the victim is a male, the Succuponi can siphon the live-energies of their victim to power their own magic. Unfortunately, neither Celestia or I ever found a way to break the magic that binds a Succuponi to it’s victim other than banishing the Succuponi to Tartarus, where it’s magic cannot reach Equestria.” Luna continued explaining, painting layer upon layer of wards upon herself and Twilight, her eyes twitching from Sunset to Trixie, then back to Twilight before roaming back to the two other Mares. “Twilight, this is very important. Under no circumstances are you to let Sunset or Trixie, especially not Sunset, meet your eyes or kiss you. You are not a true Immortal yet, and I fear that if they are able to corrupt you, you will be turned into a Succuponi yourself. I … I would have to use the Petrification Spell upon you if that happens, Twilight. We cannot allow the Element of Magic to fall into the hooves of the Succuponies, they would be able to crack open their prison in Tartarus and flood back into Equestria, and finish off the Ponies once and for all.”

“What … what do you mean? Finish off the Ponies?” Twilight hissed, added another layer to her barriers and spreading them all over the walls, floor and ceiling, weaving anti-teleportation magic into the new barrier. Luna makes this sound like an actual threat, not just another day of weirdness in Ponyville. “You mean they’d attack Ponies?”

“No, Twilight. Celestia and myself only found out that Succuponies could siphon the life out of their male victims after we assaulted the Coven itself, when it was too late. Thousands of Stallions died or were drained to the brink of death as the Coven drained their life-essences in an attempt to escape our banishment spell. Hundreds of Mares were turned against their will into Succuponies to serve as cannon-fodder against us, and turned other Mares in-turn, all of whom were either slain or banished to Tartarus with the Coven.” Luna explained as Trixie began to slowly stir to wakefulness, Sunset Shimmer still out cold. “The reason there are so few Stallions in Equestria is because the last time Succuponies walked the land, they devoured almost every Stallion that they could catch to sate their eternal hunger for male essence, and the Stallions who had been contracted by Succuponi, willing or not, were far more likely to sire Fillies than Colts, a trait that has bred true ever since. In the aftermath of the war, the loss of so many Stallions almost destroyed the Three Tribes, and forced them to inter-marry or face extinction.”

“We cannot allow you to fall to these Succuponi, nor can we allow them to escape this basement and begin the cycle again. No matter what, Twilight, we must hold the line here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“….sent a message to Celestia without a Flame-Scroll spell?” That … sounded like Twilight?

“More like a magical beacon. Any Royal agents within fifty miles will sense it through their regalia and send a message to Celestia. All we have to do now is hunker down and wait for my sister to arrive and help us contain the situation … oh. The blue one is waking up.” That deeper voice belonged to the Lunar Princess … Trixie felt a shiver run down her spine at the thought of being prone and helpless before the fearsome Princess of the Night.

“Tw-Twilight?” Trixie mumbled, pushing herself into a sitting position with limbs that trembled as if the Great and Humble Trixie had just run a marathon, and her rear felt … odd. Like it was far too long and heavy.

“I’m … here, Trixie. How are you feeling? What are you feeling?” Mistress Twilight’s voice sounded muffled, but so deliciously close. Just hearing her concern and worry made all the pain and humiliation of being Sunset’s unwilling partner seem so distant now.

“Trixie feels … strange. Is there something wrong with Trixie’s tail?” Trixie asked, trying to turn her head to look, but falling over onto her side as the effort overwhelmed her with vertigo. “Trixie has not felt this bad since she had that bad batch of oats in Baltimare … oooogh.”

“Yes, uhm, there’s something … different, yes. Do you … remember exactly where you brought that Spell-Scroll?” Twilight asked, little more than a purple blur in Trixie’s eyes.

“Trixie was … Trixie remembers … earning it from a Minotaur who said she had bought it from a Pegasus who had been fired from a newspaper in Canterlot.” The Show-Mare stumbled over her words in an attempt to not sound bad before Twilight, rubbing at her eyes to try and clear her vision before standing up again, blinking blearily and struggling to stand against the wave of vertigo that rushed through her. “The Minotaur had no use for the scroll, since she could not use pony-magic, and the Pegasus skipped town after making the trade.”

“Yes Trixie, but where?” Now it was the Lunar Princess speaking, and it wasn’t vertigo that sent Trixie back to the floor.

“A-A-A small trading-post at the border of Gryphonia! Featherbrook, where the nearby Gryphon miners come to trade gems for food and medicinal supplies!” Trixie whimpered, pressing her face down into the floor. “Trixie had heard that a Minotaur merchant had made a bad trade when she was passing through the town, and Trixie thought that maybe the Scroll could … help Trixie with a problem.”

“I’m not entirely sure what Weeaboo’s spells could help with. Okay, Luna, I’m fairly certain that Trixie’s not one of those …”

“Perhaps. That tail concerns me, but she does not have the … tainted aura … that Sunset Shimmer does. Can you make another barrier spell?” Luna spoke up, sounding wary. Nervous, even. “I suspect that Sunset Shimmer does not quite understand exactly what she is, being trapped in the other world with no ancient texts to research her condition, and so has not made a proper Carnal Contract with Trixie, but I would rather not take the chance that she could control Trixie through the Contract, incomplete though it is.”

“I … think I can maintain a third barrier, yes. You’ll handle the wards?”

“Yes, I can give Trixie some protection, but I fear that if Sunset truly is a Succuponi, then Trixie is her first ‘Daughter’, and Succuponies can control their ‘offspring’ through verbal commands.”

“So … can’t we just stick cotton or something in her ears while Sunset’s still unconscious?”

“…Oh Faust, why did we never …”

“It’s okay Luna, trust me, sticking with Pinkie Pie for three years has taught me all about obvious solutions right under our noses.”

“What … what are you talking about?” Trixie mumbled, feeling numb and cold at being talked about like she was some sort of … threat … by her beloved Mistress, before she was enveloped in Twilight’s purple magic and levitated away from a golden-yellow blur that Trixie assumed was Sunset Shimmer, and then icy-cold magic was applied to her body, clinging tightly to her skin and itching slightly.

“It’s … just trust us, Trixie. When you first met Sunset, did she have wings and strange hooves?” Twilight asked, a tendril of magic moving a bang of silvery hair out of Trixie’s face. “Was she … different from other Ponies when you met her?”

“Define … different. She had wings, yes, Trixie remembers that, but claimed to be a new Princess. Her hooves were different than normal …” Trixie replied, confused. Just what has happened?

“New Princess? Balderdash, if she’s a Princess, I’m Discord’s cousin, twice removed!” Luna snapped, sounding enraged. “I take it that Sunset seduced you?”

“Luna!” Twilight sounded horrified. “A little tact?”

“I need to know if the spell will require two Ponies or one. Better we know now and can send them both through at once than send only one through now, and dozens more at a later date because of a lack of caution now.”

“Trixie … Trixie is ashamed to admit, but the attraction was mutual, or at least Trixie thought it was. Trixie had not thought that she would meet another of her kind so far from the coast, and when Sunset offered to help translate the Scroll with Trixie, Trixie finally thought she could be rid of her curse.”

“Wait, I thought you and Trixie were fighting over the Scroll.” Twilight asked, sounding confused. I think my eyes are slowly coming back into focus.

“We did … but not at first. We had several days of co-operation before Trixie woke up and found Sunset trying to sneak out of her wagon with the Scroll. Trixie was … hurt. And angry. And … things went very strange after that.”

“And what did you mean by ‘your kind’. Are you saying your tail has always been like that?”

“That’s impossible, Luna. I’ve met Trixie before, and she had a perfectly normal tail!”

“Tail? My … tail?” Trixie muttered, rubbing at her eyes again and craning her neck to stare at her flanks and saw … a long, blue tail, tipped by a paintbrush-like tuft of silvery hair.

I must be seeing things! Trixie thought to herself, rubbing at her eyes again, and when the vision of this strange attachment to her rear refused to dissipate, she grabbed it with her hoof and gave an experimental tug, wincing as a jolt of pain shot up her spine.

“WHAT IN FAUST’S NAME HAPPENED TO TRIXIE’S TAIL?”

“Trixie.”

“What is this? What happened to Trixie?”

“Trixie!”

“The Great and Talented Trixie looks like somepony grafted a Gryphon’s backside onto her plot!”

“TRIXIE!”

“Eeeep! Trixie apologises, Princess Luna.”

“Just … stop. What did you mean ‘one of your kind’?” Luna sighed, putting a hoof to her temples and rubbing firmly at a throbbing vein there. “Has any member of your family had black wings like Sunset Shimmer?”

“Wha … No, Princess Luna. Trixie’s family have been mostly Unicorns and a few Earth Ponies who married into the family. No Pegasi or Thestrals, not that Trixie knows of.” The blue Show-Mare said weakly, looking at the twitching tail that was now curled around her hooves with a mixture of horror and confusion. “Is that what you meant?”

“So … you were eager to hook up with another Unicorn?” Twilight asked, levitating several boxes, looking for something in the many boxes and crates at the back of the room.

“Uhm … no. Does … does Trixie have to answer the question?” The blue Show-Mare asked, turning pink and crossing her fore-legs.

“Trixie, by the authority of my crown, and for your own sake, I suggest you answer truthfully. If Sunset Shimmer is a ‘Dark Force’ as I fear she is, I will have to banish her to Tartarus. And since you claim to have not had a tail like that before you began carnal relations with her, I can only assume you have likewise been tainted.” Luna said, loudly and firmly, sighing heavily as Trixie flinched and almost dropped her face to the floor again. “I need to have proof that you are not tainted before we can risk you being released out into the world.”

Trixie shifted from hoof to hoof, feeling utterly miserable, before letting her head hang low and nodding softly.

I did not want anypony else to know. I wanted Twilight to know, of course, but not … not like this!

“Trixie … understands, Princess Luna. P-please, do not let word of this get out. Trixie’s name is already held in desperately low opinion in Equestria.” The blue Show-Mare begged, sitting on her plot and spreading her hind-legs out to the sides. “This is why Trixie sought out the Spell-Scroll of Weeaboo the Sage.”

Her horn twinkled, barely more than a cantrip, but the effect was obvious. Her pale blue belly turned darker and darker between the junction of her hind-legs, spreading up to the top of her ‘waist’, a spreading black length that grew out and thickened from her flesh, forming a solid, black-furred Stallion’s sheath.

“OH OF COURSE!” Twilight snapped, putting a hoof to her face and groaning loudly. “You cast the Spear-Maiden spell on yourself for a night of fun and it won't come off?”

“N-no, Mist-Miss Twilight!” Trixie babbled, pulling her fore-hooves over her revealed body-part, burning with shame and embarrassment over her exposure. “Trixie sought out the Spell-Scroll to try and find a cure for her family’s curse!”

“What?” Twilight and Luna said together, giving Trixie a bug-eyed stare.

“The Lulamoons have been burdened with Weeaboo’s Curse. Trixie’s family has been searching for a cure ever since we were infected by a Neighponese sailor five generations ago, and Trixie had hoped she could use the Spell-Scroll to apply a counter-curse and thus be a normal, natural Mare!”

“Lying Mule.” A new voice muttered, and all three Mares jumped and turned to look at Sunset Shimmer, who was groggily trying to stand. “Get rid of it? Tartarus, you can’t seem to stop trying to use it on anything that moves.”

“Oh buck me sideways. Trixie, put these over your ears, and DO NOT REMOVE THEM UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!” Twilight shouted, magically throwing a pair of industrial-grade ear-mufflers to the Show-Mare. “This is an order from two Princesses, Trixie Lulamoon!”

“Y-yes Mist … Miss Twilight!” Trixie saluted, grabbing the hard yellow-plastic ear-protectors and shoving the foam-lined head-set over her ears. Why does Twilight want me to not hear what is said now?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sunset Shimmer, what are you?” Luna thundered, her horn glowing ominously as Sunset Shimmer staggered onto her hooves, blinking rapidly to try and clear her vision. Trixie sat behind her barrier, yellow ear-protectors clapped onto her head, looking back and forth at the scene before her with obvious confusion on her face.

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m a Princess.” Sunset scoffed, smirking. “Wings of a Thestral, Horn of a Unicorn, Strength of an Earth Pony.”

“No, no you are not. Your hooves are cloven, Sunset, and your tail is not that of a Pony.” Twilight pointed out, sliding behind Luna as she saw Sunset try to look her in the face, and decided that having a very angry Lunar Princess between herself and a possible Succuponi would be the best defense against accidentally being charmed. “Do you remember when you changed into what you are now?”

“Pffft, they’re cloven because I’m better than the other Princesses. And maybe I’ve got this tail because I’m a newer, better form of Princess, all four Tribes of Ponies, not just three.” Sunset retorted, sounding annoyed as every time she tried to move around to get an unobstructed view of Twilight, Luna would move in turn to block her. “Will you move, you nag? I haven’t trekked halfway across Equestria with the Inept and Stupid Trixie to stare at you! Twilight, I need to talk to you in private.”

“I will not allow that, Sunset Shimmer. On my authority as a Princess of Equestria, you are to be taken into custody by the Equestrian Guard under suspicion of being a Dark Force.” Luna replied tersely, likewise not meeting Sunset’s eyes but focusing on a spot above the Unicorn’s head. “Failure to comply will force me to believe you intend to do harm to Equestria and her people, and I will have to stop you.”

“You and what army, moon-butt.” Sunset scoffed, flipping her mane back and sneering down her muzzle at Luna, who frowned but did not meet Sunset’s eyes.

“SUNSET SHIMMER! COME OUT WITH YOUR HORN DOWN, AND YOU WILL NOT BE SMOTE INTO ASHES!” Celestia's voice boomed, loud enough to be physically painful, making the roof shake and dribbles of dust spill down over the Ponies inside the basement.

“I don’t need an army, little filly.” Luna smirked. “I have a big sister.”

Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20

“Pegasi, prepare to land!” Celestia shouted over the wind, spiralling down to the outskirts of Ponyville, ignoring the shouts of surprise of the local Pegasus, including one very familiar rainbow-maned Mare, the Pegasi Guards pulling the chariots covered in foam and sweat but steadfastly refusing to give in until their duty was done. “Unicorns, double-check each other’s wardings, then follow me to the Ponyville Library as fast as you can. I will attempt to draw the Succuponi out, then you will capture her, and I will cast the binding spell upon her!”

“Yes, your majesty!” The Unicorns shouted, their horns glowing as they double-checked their magical protections, while the four Unicorns on rotation in each chariot kept up their recovery spells on the Pegasi, shouting encouragement to their comrades as the chariots began to spiral down after Celestia.

Please, please, if I have ever earned a reprieve, let it be today. Do not take my sister and my student from me! Celestia prayed silently as her hooves touched the ground, her wings trembling with fatigue from the long flight, and she took off into Ponyville, her long legs and Alicorn strength propelling her faster than any Earth Pony could hope to run, leaping over and dodging around Ponies who stopped to bow or greet her, ignoring the shouts of surprise and dismay as their normally gentle and friendly Princess ignored her Ponies.

Even from several streets away Celestia could feel a sense of … wrongness, of a nameless dread that she could feel deep in her chest, the same feeling that every Fiend brought forth when she came near. In part a memory of her own encounters with the Dark Forces of Tartarus as a much younger Immortal, in part a very natural response from a being born to bright warmth and hope to Equestria. And so she homed in on that dread, as well as the directions of the spies she had stationed in the town.

“Princess Celestia!” A Pegasus flying overhead, a white-coated Stallion seemingly made entirely of muscles and comically tiny wings, pointed to the spreading branches of the oak-tree that had been cultivated into the town’s library by a long-forgotten Earth Pony. “There, Rarity and Applejack escorted two unidentified Ponies and two Ponies in long cloaks into the Library earlier today!”

“Excellent work! Prepare to assist the Guards!” Celestia called back, feeling a twinge of relief. At least one of the Ponies she had sent to watch over the Elements seemed to be on the scene.

“Yes ma’am, I mean, YEAAAAAAAH!” The Pegasi shouted, slipping back into his role as more of Ponyville’s inhabitants came rushing to see what had brought Celestia in such a rush.

That’s going to be a problem. Celestia thought as the crowd of Ponies trying to shout questions to her got closer and closer, despite the barked demands of her Royal Guards for them to disperse. I need to find Twilight and Luna, and get them out of danger first. Then I will try to get the Ponies to get to safety. As cruel as it sounds, I cannot risk the other Princesses to save the Ponies.

“Princess Celestia, it … it is an honor to have you here!” The Mayor of Ponyville came running, bowing as she did, looking obviously flustered. “T-to what do we owe this great …”

“Mayor, this is an emergency, I need every Pony in the area to fall back to the outskirts of the town.” Celestia said firmly, glaring at the crowd of Ponies that were blocking her Royal Guards from getting to her, and the Succuponi. “I am invoking the Crisis Act. You and the other Civil Servants are now empowered to act in my name and order Ponies to abandon their places of work and homes until I say otherwise.”

“B-but your Highness, there’s hundreds of Ponies that we will need to evacuate, maybe if you could have sent a memo …” The Mare whimpered, shrivelling beneath the frustrated glare of her Princess. “I’ll … I’ll try, your Highness, but the Council Office recently suffered a fire, and our …”

“Mayor Mare, I do not care how you do it, just that you do it.” Celestia grated the words out before dodging around a gaggle of fillies rushing up to her with autograph books and taking wing over a row of houses, leaving a mortified-looking Mayor Mare and the stunned fillies in her wake, her eyes fixated on the library, her magic extended, sensing the auras of life around her.

Below the tree, Celestia could faintly sense Twilight, Luna and two different Ponies, while in the second level of the tree-house, she could also sense Applejack, Rarity and Spike.

The two Ponies I don’t recognise must be Sunset Shimmer and Trixie. Celestia thought, her face twisting into a frown as her wings screamed at her to let them rest, and she came back down to the ground in what could be called a graceful crash, just a few dozen meters, ignoring the cries of the Ponies behind her as the Royal Guard began to force their way through the crowd in the streets behind her, and Mayor Mare began bellowing for Ponies to evacuate Ponyville, and was drowned out by shouts for the Princess to come back, what was going on, why did they have to leave their shops abandoned right when the day had only just started.

Taking a deep breathe to both calm herself and prepare for the use of the Royal Canterlot Voice, Celestia’s eyes narrowed as one of the two unknown ‘presences’ in the basement below the Library-Tree began to grow stronger, more agitated.

I will not let you take my sister from me!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Uhm … this way, please.” Dappled Light shouted and waved to the approaching Changeling ‘swarm’, trying to not soil himself as he saw dozens of Changelings coming his way, surrounded by scores more of small cat-like creatures, and finally several larger Changelings pulling a battered carriage, over which most of the Hive flew protectively.

His commanding officer had seen the Changeling that Dappled had escorted back to the outpost on the border and proceeded to faint dead away, which left Dappled as the only ranking Guard on the base, given that every other Pony was a civilian and the other Guards were either on leave or had been pulled to more vital locations with the Gryphons agitating on the border.

Passing the information on to his superiors at the garrison further inside Equestria’s borders had been almost torture as nobody had taken him seriously until he’d gotten the Scout to speak, at which point the higher-ranking officers had all but fallen over each other to congratulate Dappled on ‘capturing’ the Hive. With much face-hoofing from both Pony and Changeling.

Dappled had taken command of the situation, or rather had gently folded up his comatose commander under the desk and used the Scrying Crystal to alert the nearest garrison after letting Command in Canterlot know about the situation, then told the Changeling to go fetch it's Queen and bring her here for medical attention for her injuries.

The Changeling had simply nodded, it's horn had glowed a vibrant green, and then it had proceeded to shadow him around the Outpost as Dappled and the senior paper-pushers got everyone but the bare necessary staff evacuated.

Which just left Dappled and three middle-aged desk-jockeys to face the Hive.

“I’m not sure this is covered in my contract …” One of the older Stallions muttered, sweating far heavier than the weather should have allowed for. “Changelings. We’re about to be neck-deep in Changelings.”

“Just take comfort, old bean, in that it will take two Changelings to mimic your waist-line alone.”

“Oh go buck a Walrus. Sideways.”

“Gents, I don’t think this is the time.” Dappled snapped as the Hive came close enough for him to pick out individual features on the lead Changelings, the ‘Scout’ right beside him, it's chitinous features unreadable. “This is a diplomatic meeting, or so the ‘Scout’ here claims. The Garrison has been alerted, the Royal Guard will be here soon, all we have to do is stop this from boiling over into an actual fight.”

“We have no wish to fight.” The Scout said suddenly, making the four Ponies jump and look at it nervously. “Our Queen is badly damaged. Her offspring are … strange. The Elder Queens are coming. We have no choice but to seek refuge amongst the Ponies.”

“Elder Queens … Celestia’s Beard.” Dappled sighed and put a hoof to his face. “Look, just … let’s keep this calm, and quiet. Nopony panics, nopony says anything that could get anypony in trouble, and we all get out of this without a scratch.”

And hopefully the Changeling doesn’t spill the beans about me spilling my seed all of it's face. Dappled thought, and swore mentally. That would be just the kind of kick to the teeth his career needed!

Slowly, the carriage was pulled up to the waiting Ponies, the three pencil-pushers bowing low as if greeting a visiting monarch from another kingdom rather than a known enemy of the state, while Dappled saluted … and kept his eyes firmly on the carriage.

The door swung open, revealing the infamous Changeling Queen … who looked positively emaciated, the holes in her legs bigger and more numerous than the wanted-posters had described, her insect-like wings lined with dozens of cracks and stress-lines, her horn chipped and peeling, with deep, dark bags under her eyes, and despite his intention to be a firm but polite soldier for once, Dappled couldn’t help but wince at the sight.

“Your Highness.” Dappled inclined his head, giving the bare minimum respect to the ‘enemy’ of the state, and received the barest hint of a smile from the emaciated Queen. “Once you are ready, we have prepared the outpost for your … visit. I will leave your care in the hooves of your followers, but as the ranking officer of this outpost, I must formally ask that they do not engage in any acts that could be construed as … hostile.”

“Threatened, little Pony?” Chrysalis wheezed, and the Guard flinched as he heard the sound of a Foal beginning to cry inside the vehicle. “I assure you, the survival of my Hive depends upon the goodwill of your kind. None of my Drones would be so foolish as to risk offence.”

“As your … scout has informed me, your Highness, your health is of great concern, and you can hardly be brought before Celestia on a stretcher. I must emphasize that we keep this visit as polite and calm as possible because the commanding officer from the barracks further inland is known for his … temper.” Dappled ventured, feelings of irritation at this disruption of his boring, banal life and a surge of pity for this ruined figure before him warring with the duties ingrained into him during basic training. “He was present in Canterlot during your last … visit … and Major Brass Stars is not the kind of Pony who takes losing well.”

Chrysalis sighed and nodded, the slight smile leaving her face, making her look haggard and worn again, and finally Dappled was able to see what looked like a number of small, squirming shapes beneath a tattered pile of rags.

The thought of black, maggot-like offspring filled him with revulsion and a desire to be violently ill, but he managed to not give in, hoping any expression he made would be construed as concern for a potential conflict.

“While I have sent a message onwards to Canterlot stating your intentions, Major Brass Stars will arrive long before any of our Diplomats will. I suggest giving him no reason to doubt the sincerity of your desire to surrender to Equestria, if only to avoid a … diplomatic incident?”

“We have to echo young Dappled’s warnings, your Highness.” One of the bureaucrats spoke up, eyeing the flying Changelings that swarmed protectively overhead with obvious nervousness. “Major Brass Stars was placed out here precisely because his temperament made him a dangerous liability to borders with our more … volatile neighbours. It would be very dangerous to antagonise him, given your current … status … in Equestria.”

“As a wanted criminal, you mean.” Chrysalis sighed and nodded again. “You have my thanks. Now, if you please, I need a moment to tend to my hatchlings, and then my guards will bring me inside to wait until the Royal Guard arrive to … ugh … take me into custody.”

“Your Highness.” The bureaucrats bowed, and Dappled took his cue from them, inclined his head and backed up with the other Ponies as the Changelings all began to land, utterly silent but for the occasional clack of chitin on chitin and the soft whining of the ‘baby’ Changelings within the carriage. “Dappled, I suggest you retire to the outpost with us.”

“Err, my duty as a Guard states that I should …”

“Dappled, m’boy, it wasn’t a suggestion."

Following the three bureaucrats, Dappled listened as the fat one explained further. "By arriving under a flag of truce, with the offer of her own voluntary surrender, Chrysalis has made the situation quite dangerous for Equestria. If word gets out that we’ve roughed up a visiting member of Royalty, even a hostile one, after she arrived in peace, it could cause diplomatic ripples with how the other leaders of the other Races view the Royal Guards, if not Ponies as a whole.” The second bureaucrat explained, his broad middle jiggling with every step. “We didn’t suggest you turning the outpost into her new home till the Royal Guard arrived on a whim. It’s easily defended and has its own water-supply and several day’s worth of food supplies.”

“I hardly call bulk-bought doughnuts and cheap coffee ‘food’.” The first bureaucrat muttered.

“So … we’re giving one of the most recent threats against Equestria the opportunity to turn this into a siege?” Dappled asked, confused.

“No, officially, all we’re doing is giving a visiting member of a foreign nation’s royalty the best accommodations we can provide in this situation. That those accommodations might also happen to give her a defensive advantage if a certain hot-headed Pegasus Major decides to try to push for a violent confrontation to improve his rank is purely an unhappy circumstance for us Ponies.” The third bureaucrat said, giving a tired smirk to Dappled.

“You know, if I actually cared about advancing my rank, I’d be rather worried right now about cock-blocking Brass Stars like this.” Dappled muttered as the clatter of the Changelings behind them grew louder and more energetic. “I just hope that we’re all just being paranoid, and Brass Stars isn’t going to get all gung-ho about this.”

Chapter 22

Chapter 22

“Twi!” Applejack jumped as Twilight appeared in a flash of magic, covered in silvery squiggles and looking like the gates of Tartarus were opening up under her hooves. “Twi, wha’s goin’ on here? Princess Celestia’s shoutin’ somethin’ ‘bout you an’ Luna an’ …”

“Darling, what is happening …”

“NO! We don’t have time for this, we’re leaving! Rarity, no magic! Applejack, grab her and Spike, and then grab me!” Twilight yelled, silencing the babble of her friends, a wild, panicked look in her eyes.

“Darling, I am not going out there, in-front of Princess Celestia in this state, without an explanation about what is going on!” Rarity snapped, looking offended more than worried as she slapped Applejack’s hooves away.

“Faust dammit, Sunset Shimmer is a Demon that is going to turn us all into more like her and Celestia is going to burn down the library to stop her!” Twilight yelled back as a voice below them began to scream incoherently, even as the light outside grew brighter and brighter, spilling up the stairwell as well as flooding in through the windows.

“I will not believe that our Princess would be so …”

“Oh heck no, ah’ve seen this movie! No time fer yer drama, Rares!” Applejack agreed, swinging her hoof with all of her might and clipping Rarity on the chin, the Unicorn rocking backwards, her eyes rolling back into her head. “Spike, grab Rares, an’ don’ you give me that look!”

“I cannot believe you just hit Rarity …” Spike muttered, grabbing his beloved Pony and dragging her over to Applejack as Twilight turned and began throwing everything not nailed-down against the doorway. “Seriously, Twilight, is this a real emergency, or another ‘Need it Want it’ debac-“

Spike’s grumblings were silenced as Twilight placed a hoof over his muzzle, her second hoof onto Applejack’s neck, and focused her magic again, teleporting out of the library moments before the sunlight grew so bright the room began to fade away …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia could have screamed in frustration if all of her attention was not focused on the library, and the pillar of divine sun-magic that she struggled to keep contained over such a ‘small’ target. So much power, so much energy that the very substance of the tree was starting to look ethereal from over-saturation her celestial energy, yet if she slipped just a bit, the binding spell would spread out over most of Ponyville, including herself.

This had always been Celestia’s Achilles Heel. Power was never a problem for her, but rather being able to focus that overwhelming power, to use it without it harming everything around her target. The sun only gave life and warmth because it was so distant from the land, after all. Just like her power, if it got too close, if it was not tightly controlled, it would burn everything away …

Apparently Ponyville Ponies did not understand ‘disperse’. Or ‘evacuate’. Or ‘get away from here’. Most of her Guards were stuck trying to push back a number of Ponville Ponies who apparently possessed either a suicidal streak a mile wide or were completely unable to read the situation, such as their Princess screaming at them to run and a pillar of light so bright it would probably blind a Pony if they looked directly at it for too long.

Despite Mayor Mare’s repeat efforts, dozens of Ponies kept trying to get to her, demanding to know what was going on, who was going to compensate them for lost business, was this Twilight’s fault again, dozens of banal, stupid, time-wasting demands for her attention as the Solar Princess brought the binding spell, powered by the essence of her own sun, to focus down on the library, wincing as she felt all of Twilight’s magical protections around and through the living tree burn up and fade away under the uncontestable might of the Sun.

“Ma’am, we have to disperse the Ponies!” A Unicorn Guard shouted, using his levitation to push a trio of Earth Pony Mares back, only for them to batter at the shield and shout about their ‘rights’ as they held up cameras and autograph books. “They won’t get the hint! They think this is some sort of stunt!”

“Quite frankly, dear Captain, I do not give a damn.” Celestia roared, eye twitching as she felt the binding spell flicker as her concentration shifted, the thought of Luna and Twilight being caught in the binding, frozen in time with the Succuponi, trapped unmoving and fully self-aware in the stasis bubble until Celestia could spare the Magi needed to ‘pop’ the bubble and attempt to re-seal the Fiend testing her control over the spell. “We cannot afford to let the Succuponi loose, nor can we risk it corrupting my sister or my student. You were authorized to use lethal force if required, do what you feel you must to make them leave before this turns into a fight for all of Equestria!”

“Princess! Princess, anything to say about your stude-eeeeeigh!” A reporter’s shouted question turned to a shriek of surprise as an arc of electricity from a Guardspony’s horn sent him leaping backwards. “Brutality! Guard brutality, you all saw i-eeeeeigh!”

“You’re disobeying a Royal Edict from Celestia herself, in person, to flee a combat zone! If you survive this, you’ll be lucky if all you get out of the Courts is several weeks in Horseshoe Bay!” The Guard shouted back, as all throughout the street, Guards turned their horns and their magic on the stubborn or the ignorant, forcing them back with small, painful electric shocks until even the most determined ran off, leaving the Guards finally free to help Celestia.

The complaints and the bad publicity, the rumours of brutality and Unicorn racism against the mostly Earth-Pony citizens of Ponyville were for tomorrow’s Ponies to handle. All that mattered was obeying Celestia and stopping the Succuponi from causing harm.

“Sister!” Celestia flinched at the desperation in that voice as a swirling, nebulous glob of the night-sky came rocketing out the front door, unfolding and spreading out to reveal Luna and a cowering, shaking blue Unicorn with … that tail. “Sister, Twilight is still in there with her friends, you must stop!”

“Luna, I cannot, you know that I –“ Celestia’s words were cut off as a purple light appeared, flashed and disappeared in the blink of an eye, leaving three smoking Ponies and a ash-covered baby Dragon on the other side of the street. “TWILIGHT! Luna, see to her, and leave … that ... for the Guards to handle.”

Luna opened her mouth to say something, but her eyes strayed to Twilight and her friends, widening as the white Unicorn, Rarity, slumped down onto the ground, Spike falling with her, yelling her name as Applejack and Twilight both fell to their knees, smoke drifting up from their manes and tails.

It took everything Celestia had not to rush over as Luna had and start fussing over the Ponies, but even now Celestia could feel the Succuponi raging inside the binding spell, dragging itself up through the library and forcing it's way through the binding spell. The screams were certainly painful, but the tones were ones of rage and loss, and the figure that stepped out from the doorway, struggling against the pressure of the binding spell that was supposed to be trapping the demonic energies inside the Succuponi in a stasis-field.

“Give me … back … give me … TWILIGHT!” Sunset Shimmer screamed, tears streaking down her face even as her horn blazed with light, wrapping her in raw, chaotic magic that was the cause of her movement, distorting the binding spell just enough to keep her moving. “She’s … mine … MINE! MINE AND NOPONY ELSE’S!”

“Guards! Stop her! She must not leave the area of the binding spell!” Celestia shouted, wincing as the remaining Unicorn Guards lowered their heads and began launching bolts of magical ‘force’ at the Succuponi, slowing her pace even more as the opaque projectiles slammed into Sunset’s body. “We need hold only twenty more seconds! Even Sunset cannot hold against the Binding Spell once it reaches that level!”

“She’s mine! We’re meant … to be!” Sunset screamed, dropping onto her chest as a lucky bolt of force took her in the knee and sent her to the ground. “WE WILL RULE EQUESTRIA, TOGETHER! GIVE ME MY TWILIGHT!”

On and on the bolts came, pounding the Succuponi’s head, her limbs, her wings, even as she screamed for Twilight to come to her, for Twilight to rule Equestria at her side and to depose Celestia with her. Celestia no longer cared that the streets were full of Ponies staring at the scene, that Luna was holding Twilight openly in the streets and had her wings wrapped around the new Princess and her friends. She didn’t care that her horn ached with the force of the binding spell, building to dangerous levels of power or that the liquid dripping down her face could be either sweat or blood.

Her whole world had narrowed down to the screaming, crying Fiend that threatened all she held dear in the world, and the agony of holding such a powerful spell over such a small area as the seconds seemed to drag on into hours. Despite the barrage from her Guard Ponies and the pain each one must have caused, Sunset came on and on, inching towards the edge of the binding spell, towards freedom, until finally the chaotic aura of magic she was using finally bled off just a foot from the boundary, and the Succuponi was entrapped in an aura of golden magic, frozen in place, eyes rolling in rage and frustration.

Celestia held the binding for another five seconds, then collapsed, breathing heavily and exhausted, the pillar of light that had surrounded the library-tree fading away into motes of brilliant, golden light, even as she was swarmed by Ponies, trying to lift her up, to wipe the sweat, or was it blood, off her face, carrying her away as her Guard Ponies in turn swarmed over the now paralyzed Sunset shimmer, binding her hooves with manacles of enchanted gold, strapping her wings down, muzzling her with a solid tube of gold and capping her horn with a horn-muffler made of pure gold which was then secured under her chin with another golden chain.

The Succuponi’s fiendish powers would have no effect on the pure metal, and with her eyes covered, her body paralysed and the Guards ready to deliver death-blows if necessary, Sunset was as good as finished.

“Celestia, Celestia!” Blinking her eyes open, Celestia saw Luna, Twilight and Spike, as well as a Mare in a nurse’s uniform, clustered around her, looking worried. “Oh thank our Mother, you’re alright! Your horn was bleeding, Tia! What were you thinking, channelling so much power without a proper grounding circle?”

“Had to … be done.” Celestia croaked, reaching up with her fore-hooves to grab Twilight and Luna around the necks, and pulled them into a clumsy embrace. “Couldn’t … couldn’t lose you, either of you, again. Are the … the Ponies safe? They wouldn’t … wouldn’t obey, wouldn’t leave when I told them to …”

“Everypony is fine, Princess.” Spike said, saluting smartly before sniffling and throwing himself down next to Twilight, hugging Celestia’s neck. “Mayor Mare and a few of your Guards are rounding up the Ponies that wouldn’t leave, and …”

“It’s fine … it’s fine. So long as they listen next time … so long as they’re safe.” Celestia sighed. It didn’t matter that she was covered in sweat and blood and dust, that she lay exhausted in the dirt before her subjects. Twilight, Luna and Spike were safe and by her side again, the threat had been vanquished, and all was right again.

And then the world exploded into red-and-gold flames, and the triumphant scream of the Demon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight had felt fear before. When facing the Ursa Minor, when she had been alone against Nightmare Moon, so many times had she felt that thrill of terror run through her body.

None of it even came close to this. What she knew of Demons and Fiends stated that pure gold would neutralize their power, the nature of the metal would dissipate their magical energies.

And yet even with so much gold on her body, binding her horn, covering her eyes and shackling her body, Sunset Shimmer still raged, her power spilling out past her constraints like flames seething around the bottom of a pan, trying vainly to consume all around them.

The nearest Guards had already pulled back, many of them screaming as tongues of red-and-gold flame danced along their armor and coats, rolling across the ground in a futile attempt to extinguish the mystic flames before their comrades could reach them and attempt to dispel the flames, leaving Sunset alone to struggle against her bonds.

And, apparently, Succuponi were not only blessed with regenerative abilities, but also great physical strength, as Twilight considered with horror as the soft golden links of her chains began to stretch and warp.

“NO!” Luna shouted, pulling away from her sister and conjuring a sphere of ice, which she flung at the Succuponi, bathing Sunset Shimmer in hoar-frost which quickly melted, but hardened the golden chains for precious moments, moments in which a Twilight found herself casting her tentacle spell, the black, rubbery tentacles snapped out from the ground, wrapping around the Succuponi’s legs, body and neck, dragging Sunset to the ground even as the gold-and-red flames she was producing began to make them melt and drip away like wax.

“Twilight? TWILIGHT, WHY? YOU’RE MEANT FOR ME, YOU’RE MY DESTINED LOVER! Twilight, please, I’m here to save you, like you saved me, so we can rule Equestria together! So we won’t have to be alone anymore!” Sunset screamed, despair in her voice as Twilight cast her spell again and again, smothering the Succuponi’s mystical flames in tentacles that would melt and be overlaid by new ones until all there was left was Sunset’s head, still bearing a pair of badly-distorted blinders and a partially melted cone of gold on her horn, and a Pony-sized pile of sticky black latex that gummed her to the ground.

“I am not yours, Sunset, and I don’t have any romantic feeling towards you.” Twilight shouted, furious and terrified at the same time, dearly wanting to go over and slap the Mare who had caused so much confusion and fear to Ponyville, who had made Celestia hurt herself, but Luna’s warnings about getting too close, about being charmed, still filled her head and kept her from making a rash, emotional attack on the Succuponi. “I’m your friend, and I’m going to help you get back to normal, but I am not, and never will be, your lover.”

Sunset stared at Twilight, her mouth working silently, her eyes rolling as she tried vainly to make eye-contact with Twilight, to make her see how she felt, only to break down into tears when Twilight turned around and wearily trotted over to Luna, leaning against the midnight-blue Alicorn for support as Luna’s wings wrapped around the smaller Princess.

“NOOOOOOOO!” The Succuponi screamed in despair before breaking down into sobbing as the unharmed Guards descended upon her with glowing horns.

Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23

“Well, tha’ was a thing.” Applejack sighed, holding an ice-pack to Rarity’s chin as Ponyville crawled with Royal Guards, inspecting every sentient being in town for traces of the Succuponi’s magic, several concentric rings of Guards bearing gleaming pikes bristling like a giant, angry hedgehog around their Princesses, and by dint of proximity, the bearers of the Elements that were still in the town.

“Yeah … just wow, you know.” Rainbow replied, her eyes fixed on where a cluster of Royal Guards stood around a cage of solid gold, spears thrust through the bars, the heavily-enchanted spear-heads pressed firmly against the neck of the goop-imprisoned Succuponi inside, who had remained catatonic ever since being rejected by Twilight. “Kinda scary, you know? Twilight almost got turned into a Demon because of some creepy Mare she tried to help once? That’s … creepy. And scary. And weird.”

“I’m sure she had her reasons …” Fluttershy whispered as she changing the bandages on Celestia’s horn, the Solar Princess murmuring her thanks as the herbal water the bandages had been soaked in stole away the aches from the abused horn.

“Be that as it may, did I really require an Apple-Family Haymaker?” Rarity grunted, giving Applejack, and then Twilight, a steel-melting glare.

“Rares, you’ll sit on your plot in-front of your mirror and preen till the world ends if you think your mane’s not good enough to be seen in public. An’ with all that magic goin’ on, an’ all that screamin’ from the basement, you were jus’ gonna sit there an’ argue with Twi?” Applejack shot back, scowling back at the Unicorn.

“Rarity.” Celestia said, firmly, drawing the white Unicorn’s attention to her. “I have done far worse to a Pony much closer to me. If trapping you all in the stasis field would have spared Equestria another Lust War, I would have done so. My responsibilities to the Ponies, and other races, that dwell within Equestria’s borders demand no less.”

Rarity blinked, her mouth opening to protest, before her eyes wandered over to where Luna was talking to a balding, middle-aged Unicorn in a General’s uniform, and her mouth snapped shut.

“That was what I was worried about, Rarity, if Sunset had gotten to us she could have corrupted us into more Succuponies. And then we’d have to be sent to Tartarus to prevent us turning more Ponies in turn. Assuming that, given our connection to the Elements of Harmony, we even could be sent to Tartarus, or that we wouldn’t immediately corrupt the Elements and become unstoppable.” Twilight explained, bowing her head in guilt as Rarity closed her eyes and compressed her mouth into an angry frown. “I just … I tried to help her find friends. I never gave Sunset any hint, any indication I felt a romantic attraction to her, so why did she … it doesn’t make any sense!”

“If I may offer a theory on Sunset's actions?” Celestia sighed, pushing herself up to a sitting position as the Ponies around her turned their attention back to her, concern written all over their faces. “I suspect that Sunset Shimmer, being as ambitious and cold as she was towards Ponies, never made any friends in either this world, or the other one, and thus could not truly understand the difference between friendship and romantic feelings. As time passed in the other world and her personality isolated her from the beings around her, she probably became obsessed with you, a kind stranger who was not only stronger than her but was able to develop emotional rapports with others, something Sunset could never do.”

“If her life on ‘Earth’ became miserable, she probably fell into delusions about a relationship with yourself to retreat from the pain, and as time went by, she would find it harder and harder to leave the delusion and face the reality where she would have to deal with the repercussions of her actions. It would offer a reason why she went after the Spell-Scroll and met Trixie, rather than directly coming after you when she returned to Equestria. If Sunset could make herself indispensable to you, she could stay by your side and make her delusion a reality if she could solve your ‘failure’ for you.”

“Tha’s … kinda sad, Princess. Y’mean to say that all Sunset wanted was a friend, an’ now that she’s this Suck-yuh-thingy, she’s … gotta got to Tartarus?” Applejack murmured as her friends all turned to look at the cage where Sunset was confined. Twilight shuddered, having seen glimpses of that infernal prison-realm when she had returned Cerberus to his post at the gates.

Despite all she did, and what she almost did to me, sending Sunset to that place seems like the cruellest thing we could do. She’s just … lonely, and confused about how to deal with other Ponies, just like I used to be ... right?

“Maybe we could use the Elements of Harmony to try and purify her?” Fluttershy asked, earning a shrug from Twilight.

“Perhaps. But it was the Element of Magic that corrupted her in the first place when Sunset tried to force it to accept her as its new host. A full dose of Harmony could cure her … or it could turn her to stone. Or banish her to Tartarus. Or … it could kill her.” The purple Princess sighed and rubbed at her temples in frustration. “It might save her, it might destroy her, and even then we have no guarantee that it will even affect her given that the Element of Magic was a component in her transformation in the first place. Faust help us all, it might even empower her further, I mean, she was able to shrug off a Binding Spell from Celestia and almost melted her way through restraints made of pure gold, which are supposed to be proof against the powers of Tartarus. I don’t think we can handle a Succuponi wielding a corrupted Rainbow of Harmony …”

“That, my friends, is a topic for another day.” Luna pointed out, walking through the ring of Guards to rejoin them. “For now, we must put Sunset Shimmer in the Cell of Ultimate Holding, where she won’t be able to escape or use her magic against other Ponies. And the only way we’re going to be able to do that is on a train, since trying to carry the cage back to Canterlot via flying carriage would be too much for the Pegasi. Especially if she came-to on the way back with no Unicorns or Alicorns around to cast a binding spell upon her.”

“How have the media taken the news? That a Fiend started running amok and attacked Twilight during your training mission?” Celestia asked as the Element-Bearers started to discuss how they were going to try and put today behind them.

“Quite well, actually. Everypony loves a hero, after all.” The Lunar Princess gave her sister a tired grin. “The fact that Sunset Shimmer was unpopular with many of the Ponies in Canterlot, and was also a known Unicorn supremacist before she was exiled, will garner more attention than anything else, I think.”

“Good. At least something is going right today.” Celestia sighed and forced herself to her hooves, suddenly feeling the weight of five thousand years on her shoulders. “Twilight, Luna, although I know this will cause problems, I need you both to remain in Ponyville, where I can ensure you will be protected. We were lucky this time, but I will sleep easier if you are someplace with a strong Guard-presence.”

“Uh, but the Press will …” Twilight pointed out, before swallowing her protest as she looked at her friends, then the small army of Guards Ponies occupying the town, and then the cage containing the Succuponi. “Oh-kay, yeah, Paparazzi are not the biggest threat here.”

“I will leave only a token force of Guards here, but I will put the Agents here on full alert. Which means you’re going to be making some new ‘friends’, Twilight.” Smiling softly, the Solar Princess walked over and nuzzled her former student’s head, then her sister. “And Luna, I have to ask, how is the … training … going? Pinkie has told me some … interesting news.”

“Ah. Yes, well, Twilight and I believe we may have found a way to get around our magic inter-twining against our wishes, but the more … embarrassing half of the problem still exists.” Luna replied quietly, blushing furiously, as did Twilight. “That is all I will say in public.”

“Well, so long as you two don’t cause another incident like what happened in Canterlot, it should be fine.” The Solar Princess stopped, then chuckled. “At least there’s no suits of armor here for you two to animate and send chasing my maids through the hallways.”

“So … wait … we’re going to completely ignore the media and have Luna and Twilight out in public, and have Ponyville invaded by the paparazzi and who-knows-what? Does nobody else think this is going to end poorly?” Rainbow Dash asked suddenly, shooting a hoof into the air. “Like, it’s bad enough with the usual snoops showing up to spy on us, now you’re adding Luna to the mix? If their magic is causing issues, why not just separate them?”

“Because someday, Twilight will have to leave Ponyville and take up her full duties as a Princess.” Celestia replied calmly, her eyes trailing over Rainbow with a sad look. “If Twilight and Luna cannot overcome their entanglement, then they may never be able to defend Equestria together, and that would be a weakness our enemies would exploit.”

“I’m not … not leaving for a while. A long while.” Twilight blurted after almost a minute of awkward silence. “A-a-and I’ll always come to visit, Pinkie Promise!”

“Y-yeah, not for a while. Hey, we might even move to Canterlot? Applejack needs an office there to keep up with the demand for her apples, Pinkie’s always wanted to open her own bakery, Rarity has always wanted to move there, and Fluttershy … maybe she can take over the Royal Animal Nursery?” Rainbow added, a big, false smile on her face.

“Yes, well, that’s a conversation for another time.” Luna murmured as a Royal Guard bearing two blue stripes on his uniform approached. “Lieutenant? Something to report?”

“Ma’am! The medics say that the wounded Guards are fit for duty, and that the Succuponi is completely non-responsive.” The Guard saluted smartly, eyes fixed on Celestia’s hooves. “Just in case she does start to come out of her catatonic state, the Magi have enacted a triple-layer barrier around her cage, and studded it with lightning runes. If she cracks out of the melted rubber Princess Twilight trapped her in, she’ll be shocked back into the stone-age.”

“Well done, but I will be overseeing her transfer to Canterlot personally. Tell the Magi in charge of preparing the carriage I will be there shortly, and to prepare a Starswirl-class grounding circle for my use, as well as protective rune-circle for two Guards to act as my escorts.” Celestia replied after a few moments of thought. “I wish I could stay and console the Ponies here, but we need to get Sunset Shimmer into the Cell of Ultimate Confinement before she comes to.”

“Sister, take care. She’s a high-caste Succuponi if she could still use magic when there was that much gold on her person, possibly a Queen-caste.” Luna whispered, hugging her sister tightly before stepping back so that Twilight could do the same, and the other Ponies could bow, or in Applejack’s case, shake Celestia’s hoof and wish her well.

“So … how are you two going to handle living in Ponyville?” Rainbow Dash asked, nervously glancing from Twilight to Luna. “I mean … AJ here was telling me you two were … glowing? Is that gonna be a thing?”

“It shouldn’t … be a problem. Right?” Twilight said, blushing as she looked to Luna for confirmation. “We’ll just have to … to not do any testing in town.”

“Yes, I’m sure we’ll have no problems.” Luna nodded, laying a wing on Twilight’s back and beaming. “Besides, we still haven’t gotten that mouthwash yet. Oh! That reminds me, before I forget, Celestia!”

“Yes, Luna?” Celestia called back, looking over her shoulder to the clustered Ponies.

“I’m going to need ‘the box’. The one at the back of my wardrobe.”

“I don’t know which …”

“The one you gave me when I first came back? The one with all the … teaching aids in it. Like what Twilight used in her fight against the Lyndwyrm?”

Celestia’s wings quivered, and the assembled Ponies had the high honor of watching Princess Celestia, High Overlord of the Equestrian Armies, Princess of the Realm, Goddess of the Sun, bolt for the train-station with her wings shooting straight up into the air.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Chrysalis. Of course. Because a rampaging Succuponi, two-dozen Royal Guards scarred for life by mystic flames and a dozen Paparazzi trying to sue the Royal Guard for being ‘assaulted’ when they wouldn’t leave the area under the effect of the Crisis Act wasn’t enough to make today a bad day.” Celestia sighed, rubbing her temples with both fore-hooves as she watched the Guards load Sunset’s Cage into the heavily-armored carriage. My detractors are going to have a field-day with this debacle.

“I’m … not sure how to respond, your Majesty.” The poor Guard who had brought her the news replied cautiously.

“I’m just venting, nothing more, my little pony. Thank you for the report, but tell Rhinestone I want him to keep handling ‘Queen’ Chrysalis’s … escort … to Canterlot, and keep her under the tightest security we can manage right now. I don’t need some ambitious gung-ho Pony trying to claim the bounty on her head, not with the drubbing the papers are going to give me tomorrow.” Celestia took pity on the poor Stallion and gave him a warm smile, hoping that the Guard would look less petrified of his Princess. “I would give the orders myself, but I must keep an eye on the Succuponi. She’s already fought her way out of one Binding Spell, I don’t want her doing it again, now or when we’re halfway back to Canterlot and unprepared. And please send a message to Princess Cadence and Royal-Consort Shining Armor about Chrysalis’s surrender. I’d rather they know about this sooner rather than later, given their … history … with Chrysalis.”

“Ma’am!” The Guard saluted and trotted back to the knot of Guards that were clustered around the ‘Command’ tent, where General Breach was directing Pegasi, Unicorn and Earth Pony Guards in securing Ponyville and tending to the injured Ponies.

We won this time, but only because Sunset couldn’t take being rejected by Twilight. I cannot keep relying upon the Power to twist the odds in my favour forever. Sooner or later I’ll encounter a situation where my ability to alter probability won’t be able to secure a victory for my cause. Celestia sighed heavily, feeling the weight of her many, many centuries pressing down on her like the literal weight of the world. I had truly hoped to only have to wear my crown, collar and shoes, but … I will need to start wearing the full Regalia, regardless of how militant it looks. I cannot risk having to try and funnel my power by will alone in the middle of combat, and risk having another disaster befall my Ponies.

Boarding the armored carriage was a simple matter, albeit time-consuming given that it took the Magi several tries to get a working Starswirl-class grounding circle embedded in the confines of the carriage, but in short order, Celestia and a pair of Royal Guards were seated in their respective circles of runes and magical protections, the soft rattle of the train’s wheels on the tracks a soothing noise to Celestia’s ears.

“Oh Sunset.” Celestia sighed out loud, feeling a twinge of pity as she took in the tear-stained face of her former student, her once proud visage slack and lifeless as her head rested on the pile of melted rubber Twilight had trapped the Succuponi in. “How could you have fallen so far? Why did it have to come to this? You had such potential, the capacity to do good in the world.”

Sunset’s face remained slack and unresponsive, the only sign she was alive the two trails of tears that slowly trickled down her face and her soft breathing.

“Was it me, Sunset? Did I fail you? I tried so hard to make you understand that being the leader often means you never get your own way, but you never listened, never accepted it.” Celestia lifted her head to stare at the ceiling of the carriage, feeling the sun radiating its life-giving warmth down onto the world through her connection to it, and dimly she felt the world flourishing with life because of its light, because of her warmth. Mother to everything and nothing … the Unspoken One was right about that part of my destiny, at least. I cannot save everyone … but that doesn’t mean I will just stop trying. “When you are secured, Sunset, and my Ponies are no longer at risk from your hunger, we will try to reverse the corruption, we will try to return you to being a Pony once more, so you can try again ...”

“Majesty?” One of the Guards ventured, sounding … terrified, of all things. “Princess Celestia, you’re crying.”

“It is … a hard thing, my friend, to watch somepony you cared for deeply fall to such a fate.” Celestia replied sadly, lifting a hoof to rub at her cheeks and finding them damp with moisture. “Sunset was, at one time, like a beloved niece to me.”

“And if I must, I will seal her away for a thousand years to protect Equestria. It would not be the first time I have been called upon to do so to one I held close to my heart.” Celestia remarked quietly but bitterly, as the train rattled onwards to Canterlot.

Chapter 24

CHAPTER 24

“Son.” Bluebone snorted, managing to condense over a decade’s worth of contempt and hatred into the word.

“Father.” Blueblood replied with equal venom in his tone.

“I won’t waste time. You are to give me access to your funds, and hire the best team of lawyers in Canterlot to get me out of these trumped-up charges.” Bluebone snapped, pacing back and forth in-front of the doors of Blueblood’s mansion, furious at his treatment. His son had point-blank refused to allow him into the ‘Blueblood Mansion’, treating his own father like a beggar …

Oh, he’d all but disowned Blueblood when the wretch had sided with Celestia after his elder sister had ‘disappeared’ shortly after speaking out in favour of the mud-ponies and the feather-heads, but it wasn’t as if he had kicked the boy out onto the streets! He’d only intended to teach the weak little boy that only with wealth and power could a Unicorn assume their rightful place in society. A lesson the little bastard had learned all too well.

Bluebone had only left his snivelling excuse for an heir a few bits to his name, enough to ensure he didn’t starve and would live long enough to sire something that Bluebone could take and mold into a proper heir if Blueblood had refused to bend to his will, but the little bastard had instead turned around and built a mercantile empire by cutting into his own father’s companies with some of the most ruthless tactics that Canterlot had ever seen, bought his way back into the nobility and been a constant thorn in the Shadow Court’s side ever since by going out of his way to oppose their efforts with the aid of every wretched social butterfly that flocked to the realm’s ‘Prince’.

And despite exhaustive digging by both Bluebone and the Shadow Court itself, the prat had done it all with his own bits, with not even a single loan from the whore-Princess, Celestia. If he wasn’t such an embarrassment, cavorting with mud-ponies and feather-heads as often as he did Unicorns, Bluebone would have brought his son back into the fold purely for having the stones to take on and beat some of the biggest conglomerates in Canterlot as a meek little child.

“Ah. And what do I get out of this?” Blueblood asked, stone faced with a gaggle of his servants, all pretty young Mares from all three Tribes, clustered behind them, cameras and recorders trained on the two Stallions.

Little bastard! He’ll go running to that bitch on the throne the instant I say anything about the Shadow Court, and he’ll have proof that even I can’t bury with those cameras!

“You will do as you are told boy, or so help me …”

“You’ll what? Hit me? I’ll have you in jail for assault, which might be a drop in the bucket considering the charges you already face. Try to take my wealth through the courts? You don’t have the time, and you haven’t got a viable claim to one tarnished bit, and you know it.” Blueblood sneered, but his stance remained strong, unyielding. When did that snivelling little whelp turn into a Stallion? “I will make you a deal, however. I will give you the funds you need to fight the charges levied against you, if you’ll answer the question I’ve been asking you for the past twelve years: Where is my sister, Rosette?”

“… I have no daughter called Rosette. Rosette is the name of a filthy traitor who chose to spread her legs for a filthy mud-pony.” Growling, Bluebone glared at his son, looking for any sign of the weak, cowardly child he’d thrown out of his house-hold for his insipid devotion to that harlot.

Nothing. Not even an eyelid batted. No tensing at the corner of the mouth to bite back on an insult, no flare of the nostrils in anger. This was his son, as galling as it was to admit. There was no sign of the simpering dandy that flocked to every gala or the crying brat who’d been a disgrace to the Blue House.

“Then I have no time or bits to give to an ignorant bigot. Get gone from my land, before I sic the Diamond Dogs on you.” Blueblood said, grinning, before taking a single smooth step back behind the double-doors of his mansion and slamming them shut as his father roared in rage and pounced for his traitorous son.

A minute later, when the red haze lifted from Bluebone’s eyes and he stared at the deep dents his iron-shod hooves had left in the cherry-wood doors, the faint yips of an excited pack of Diamond Dogs from the other side of the mansion tickling his ears, Bluebone couldn’t help but chuckle.

My son indeed. Bastard. If he’d shown that kind of spine ten years ago, I’d never have had to throw him out. Bluebone thought with bitter pride, seeing himself out through the long limestone path and out onto the streets, slamming the gates shut behind him as the yipping of the Diamond Dogs grew louder, the pack of mercenary guards loped into the front yard of the mansion, looking around for the ‘intruder’ on the premises. I need an heir, somepony I can rely upon to carry on the cause when I am too old to continue, or if I should fall. The line of Princess Platinum cannot falter now, not when we’re so close to our destiny!

“I take it your little reunion with your son went as well as could be expected?” Bluebone felt his anger surge again, but maintained enough control not to rush forth and trample the arrogant smile off of ‘Captain’ Rosebush’s face. Of all the things, a Pegasi commands the Palace Guard, and one of common blood no less! Celestia tramples our proud traditions out of spite.

“Ah, Rosebush. How nice to see you. I am assuming that Celestia has given you orders to ignore the law and harass an innocent Pony before his day in court?” The white Unicorn replied in a tight voice, imagining the Mare strapped down with her wings slowly being pulled off by his magic to soothe his frustrations. “I’m certain that wouldn’t look too good in front of a jury, the Royal Guard trying to pressure an innocent Pony into a confession?”

“You’re hardly innocent, Bluebone, as twenty-seven different Ponies can attest from that little stunt you engineered at the Bronze Leaf, let alone the dozen folders I have on you in my office back in the castle. In fact, I think I’ll have one of those fancy new video-cameras lined up to record the whole affair when they testify against you, so I can fall asleep to your reaction to it every night.” The pale-cream Pegasus beamed happily. Bluebone wondered why the Captain of the Royal Guard would be so confrontational with somebody of his reputation, but a quick glance around the street showed an unusual number of burly Stallions in trenchcoats standing around idly, all of them looking in his direction. “Oh, I wonder, did you have any designs on the top bunk in your cell? I have the distinct feeling you’ll be on the bottom, however.”

“One day, little Filly, you’re going to pay for all that trash talk.” The aging Stallion replied firmly, stalking away and grimacing as the Pegasi flapped overhead, still beaming that idiotic grin at him. “Unless you intend to take me into custody, I suggest you bugger off. I have more important things to do than bandy words with an overgrown pigeon.”

“Oh, what’s the matter? It must be terrible, to have all your assets frozen because you are under investigation for dealing with a terrorist group within Gryphonia, giving them bits for their bloody diamonds so they can keep buying supplies, and keep harassing the poor Guard Ponies on the borders.” The Pegasi taunted him again, and it took a great deal of effort for the aging Noble to not do the world a favour and blast the Captain out of the sky.

Probably what she’s hoping for. Assaulting a Royal Guard is grounds for imprisonment, an Officer of her rank would have me thrown straight into a cell, regardless of who did it. It would be all they would need to declare me a hostile witness and they could skip a trial by my peers.

“Nothing to say? Pity. Well, I suppose I’ll hear everything when you make your plea-bargain for exile, rather than prison.” The Pegasi taunted, and then Bluebone almost missed a step and fell.

“What?”

“You’re a snake, Bluebone, the lowest of the low. When the pressure is on, you’ll sell out the rest of your little den of vipers to get your own neck out of the noose, just like every other scumbag I’ve had to deal with.” Rosebush sneered, flapping in a tight circle over Bluebone’s head, the trenchcoat-wearing Stallions all following them, glaring at the aging Unicorn. “So here’s the deal, approved by her Royal Highness: You squeal like a good little piggie and give us the names of every member of the Shadow Court, from the janitors all the way up to your lieutenants and suppliers, and Celestia is prepared to let you go into exile. You get to leave Equestria under whatever excuse you want, on your own hooves, and crawl under whatever rock suits your fancy. Or you refuse the plea-bargain and go to Horseshoe Bay, and you can bet your last bit we’ll have the mother of all horn-mufflers waiting for you when you get there. No magic, no friends, and a prison full of the worst of Equestria’s criminals, many of whom would be more than willing to do your little Shadow Council’s dirty work and silence you.”

Bluebone stopped and stared up at the Pegasi for several moments, before his face split into a victorious grin.

“And this is why Celestia never should have put a feather-head in charge of the Palace Guard.” The aging Unicorn sneered, the Pegasi above him missing a wing-beat and had to flutter her wings rapidly to stay in the air. “If you really had anything on me, you empty-headed little commoner, you wouldn’t be offering me a deal, you’d be sending me to Horseshoe Bay and letting matters take their course while you focused on the rest of my … companions.”

Chuckling, Bluebone trotted away, leaving the Pegasi scowling in his wake, the ‘disguised’ Stallions all rushing over to her.

“Ma’am, do you think it worked?” One asked softly as Rosebush dropped down from the air and landed with a soft thump, glaring at the retreating back of the white Unicorn Noble.

“We’ve baited the hook, now we just have to see if the fish will bite. Bluebone will have to call our ‘bluff’, that we don’t have enough evidence to convict him and come into the courts underprepared, or he’ll think we do have enough, and he’ll cut a deal with us to save his own neck.” The Pegasi replied in an equally soft voice as her Royal Guards formed a protective circle around her, the group trotting back towards the castle. “With the Princess demanding we free up the Cell of Ultimate Confinement for her latest prisoner, we need to keep Bluebone and the Shadow Court as off-balance as we can till those mercenaries can stand trial.”

“But Ma’am, we don’t actually have any proof that Bluebone actually hired them. All we have is their testimony that they were hired on behalf of Bluebone by a middle-man. A pony they couldn’t identify because he was wearing a mask and a full-body suit that masked their coat and cutie mark. A pony we can’t find.” A second Royal Guard muttered nervously.

“It’ll be enough. Their testimony that they were hired to kidnap Night Light, on behalf of Bluebone, was enough to give us the legal opportunity to shut down Bluebone’s resources. No bits flowing in or out of his pockets means we can finally put the pressure on the rest of the Shadow Court without Bluebone bribing or threatening everypony involved into submission.” The Pegasi explained, smiling wickedly. “The thing with the Shadow Court is that they’re at best a cult dedicated to removing Celestia, at worst a hostile political movement. And the thing about Canterlot’s Nobles? They’ve never been able to hold it together when the prize is within reach unless Celestia is overseeing them directly. Not once in the history of Canterlot has any political bloc ever not started fighting amongst themselves when their shared goal is within reach without the Princess holding the reins.”

“All we have to do is make it look like Bluebone is going to sell the rest of the Shadow Court to us in exchange for freedom and they’ll launch an assassination attempt against him. Then not only do we have a reason to lock that horrible Unicorn away till the end of his days, for his own protection of course, but we’ll have a legally water-tight excuse to start raiding the mansions of the known Shadow Court members for information, and lock down their resources in turn.” Rosebush explained as the group of disguised Royal Guards flagged down several carriages to take them back to the castle. “Whoever hired those Mercenaries did us a huge favour. That said … keep pushing to find out who they are. It’s the one weakness in our case against Bluebone and his Shadow Court, and if our case fails because of it, any future attempts to try and pin Bluebone and his Shadow Court to the wall will be smeared with accusations of Celestia and the Royal Guard chasing after them for personal reasons. Nothing we throw at them will stick, and it’ll be just more fuel for the fire they’re building under our Princess’s plot.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So.” Twilight said awkwardly, looking around the table, where so many Ponies had crammed themselves. “Hell of a morning.”

“Tha’s one way to say it, sugar-cube.” Applejack muttered, kneading her hat between her fore-hooves as Spike walked around the library’s kitchen table, handing drinks out to the seven ponies that had crammed themselves into the Library’s kitchen “So … wha’ we gon’ do now? You an’ Luna’ll be livin’ in Ponyville, an’ Trixie is … stayin’ with y’all?”

“For the time being, yes. And Trixie, stop fiddling with that collar. If it comes off, you go with Sunset into the Cell of Ultimate Confinement.” The blue show-mare flinched under the glare of Luna, who had claimed ‘her’ spot at Twilight’s side and had wrapped a midnight blue wing around the other Princess to ward off the clingy, smaller Unicorn. “That collar will surpress any demonic powers you may develop and allow the Royal Guard to keep track of your movements. If you remove it, we will have to assume you are intending mischief, and that will end poorly for you.”

“Tri-Trixie would never … it is just … heavy. And awkward.” Trixie mumbled miserably, her hoof trailing over the heavy, solid-gold collar around her neck, little more than pair of twisted rods of gold that had been wrapped around the base of her neck and then sealed seamlessly.

“Well, it’ a bother fer sure. After all that effort to get that grub out to your camp, now Big Mac’s gotta go bring it back to the library.” Applejack pointed out, earning tired nods from Twilight and Luna. “An’ how’re you gonna explain the Royal Guards? An’ who’re these ‘agents’ Princess Celestia was talkin’ about?”

“Yeaaaaah … kinda disturbing to know we’ve had royal agents running around town, reporting on us all to the Princesses without us knowing.” Rainbow drawled, giving Luna a short glare as Rarity and Fluttershy flinched and huddled together.

“Every town within the borders of Equstria has a number of Royal Agents living amongst the populace. They are our eyes and ears, keeping watch over individuals of importance to the realm as well as being our first line of defence in-case of an emergency.” Luna shot back, frowning at the rainbow-maned Pegasus. “Celestia started the practice a few hundred years ago as she withdrew the Royal Guard from the peaceful regions of Equestria when she was demilitarizing the nation, part of a non-aggression-pact she had made with the Minotaurs and Diamond Dogs. Against most threats, the Royal Agents serve quite well, but for situations like Changelings, Ursa Minors and other extreme incidents … not so well. And they do not ‘report’ to me, only to Celestia.”

“I … should have said something earlier to you guys about it, but as Celestia’s personal student, I kinda grew up with them around me, so they just … it never seemed like an issue to me.” Twilight sighed and leaned into Luna’s wing, before shaking her head and pulling away. “Uh, the camp, yes, I think Luna and I can go pick up the supplies tomorrow and bring them back here, rather than pull Big Mac away from the farm again, and then … then we’ll ask the Royal Agents to meet you all here, and get everybody up to speed on who is going to be joining our social-circle for … for the foreseeable future. Oh Faust this just keeps getting better and better …”

“Oh come on Twilight, Celestia hoof-picks her Royal Agents, they’ll be fine.” Spike pointed out, carrying his empty tray away from the table.

“Like she hoof-picked Sunset Shimmer?” Twilight shot back. “No offence meant to either Princess Celestia or her Agents, but given everything that’s happened to Ponyville in the past three years, what the absolute buck? Have they been on an indefinite coffee break?”

“Or like she picked you!” The Drake retorted, sticking his tongue out at his sister. “And look at what you’ve done for Equestria! Saving it from Changelings, reforming Discord, turning an entire town of Ponies into lunatics fighting over your childhood stuffed toy!”

“Oh that is not cool, Spike!”

“Hey, I’m just sayin’ …”

“NOT! COOL!”

“Uh, ‘fore this gets any weirder … I’m gonna go get Applebloom an’ her friends after school an’ take ‘em back to the farm for tonight. Might be safer if’n we keep the Cutie Mark Crusaders all together an’ confined-like, away from … away from things they ain’t gonna unna’stand.” Applejack muttered as Twilight and Spike gave each other matching glares, shooting a nervous look at Trixie and her new tail. “Y’don’t mind, Rares?”

“Let me see, you’ll keep my sister occupied for the night while I catch up with my work? No, I see no problems at all, Applejack. I’ll even call us quits for that punch you gave me earlier.” Rarity smiled warmly. “In fact, I’ll even pop down to the Cake’s shop and buy desert for your family’s evening meal.”

“Awwww, shucks Rares, that’d be just fantastic. It’d be nice to have something different at the table, other’n apples … not that apples are bad, jus’ … nice to have somethin’ else to offer our guests.”

“Uh, Rarity, I know it’s none of my business, but I really don’t think giving the girls sugar before bed-time is really goo-ow!” Fluttershy murmured quietly before squeaking in alarm, looking under the table, and then at Rarity, with a stunned expression.

“Ssssh!” Rarity hissed, equally softly, before turning back to Applejack with a beaming smile.

“Trixie is somewhat afraid for her future.” The blue show-mare muttered, eyeing the deranged Ponies that she shared the table with trepidation. “Do you … do you really think the Elements of Harmony can absolve Trixie of all her … problems, Miss Twilight?”

“They didn’t fix Discord’s attitude, pretty sure they can’t fix yours.” Rainbow offered cockily, and earned a pair of kicks under the table from Twilight and Applejack.

“Uh, in regards to the tail, more than likely, yes. The other … other thing? I … I have absolutely no idea. Maybe? If it’s not harmonious with the rest of you, they should be able to either seal it or otherwise take it away, if not … the Elements of Harmony won’t do anything.” The purple Princes gave a nervous smile at Trixie, who appeared to melt at the sight. “Oooooh-kay. Memo to self: definitely adding locks to all the doors then. Uhm, Luna, are you sure that Trixie shouldn’t be in Canterlot? Being protected by the Royal Guard, in Canterlot, I mean.”

“Between the tensions at the Gryphonia border, maintaining a sufficient Guard presence in the towns and villages to keep any criminal elements from trying to cause problems, in addition to having to guard Sunset Shimmer and then Queen Chrysalis surrendering at the southern border … quite frankly, Twilight, I would be surprised if we had any Royal Guards who are free to be put on such duties.” Luna offered with a sigh. “Nobody is more unsure about our current … living arrangements than I am, but for now, this is the best solution we can provide without throwing a potentially innocent Pony in the dungeons.”

Trixie and Fluttershy shared a startled meep, while Rainbow just rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“Alright … alright. Okay then, girls, we go about our lives as best we can for now, and tomorrow I’ll introduce you all to the Royal Agents. Let’s go show the rest of Ponyville that everythings A-Ok!” Twilight said after several moments of silence, standing up and stepping out from under Luna’s wing. “Rarity, any rumors you hear, I need to know about. Fluttershy, if any of your animals have seen or heard anything odd, please pass it on to either Luna or myself. Applejack, Rainbow Dash, anything you can do to distract the townsponies and lift their spirits would be greatly appreciated.”

“An-and what do you wish Trixie to do, Miss Twilight?” Trixie asked eagerly, her long, leonine tail waving in the air.

“Trixie … you’re helping Spike shift all his stuff down into the basement, and after that, assisting him with cleaning up the library. Luna and I have some … shopping … to do while we meet with Mayor Mare and try to assist Celestia’s damage-control.”

“Woo-hoo! I finally get my own minion!” Spike cheered, pumping both claws into the air.

Chapter 25

CHAPTER 25

“You know, if I wasn’t so terrified sir, I’d be in awe of your wife.” Dappled whispered, crouching behind the desk with his C.O. Peach Seed, Scout and one of the burly ‘Guard’ Changelings, as several very confused and frightened Changeling Drones and a somewhat miffed Queen Chrysalis were run ragged creating a nursery for her three broodlings by Peach Seed’s wife, a very wide, very large, very loud Mare by the name of Candy Apple.

Every time Chrysalis tried to protest, or her Changelings didn’t do exactly as directed, Peach Seed’s ‘delicate little flower’ would turn and fix what Dappled could only call the ‘Glare of Death’ on them. The Changelings would cower and fall all over each other as they rushed to complete their tasks, and in the case of the Changeling Queen, over several seconds of exposure to the ‘Glare of Death’ the Queen would go from angry protests to spluttering to mute silence.

“Well Dappled, you’ll find Mares like my sweet little angel if you try hard enough.” The aging officer said with a dreamy look on his face as he looked over the table at his wife. “I still remember the day we were engaged.”

“A fancy dinner date?” Dappled asked as the ruckus in the next room grew louder, with the added laughter of Chrysalis’s three ‘foals’ as they played amongst the legs of their beleaguered kin.

“Somewhat. I had been held back at the base by some paperwork, and was rushing over to my darling’s homestead, hoping to salvage what was supposed to be our one-year anniversary with an expensive bouquet of roses for dinner.” Sighing happily, Peach Seed gave what could best be described as ‘puppy-dog eyes’ to his very-large-and-in-charge Wife in the next room. “I was greeted at the door by her father and let inside, and there was my angel, giving me a nervous smile with her entire family gathered around her, grinning like Diamond Dogs in a jewellery store. I was worried, because it had only been a few months since my sweet angel and I had stepped into a more … physical state of our relationship, and her kin weren’t too keen on a career soldier dating one of their own, especially when I could be reassigned to somewhere else in Equestria at a drop of a hat. But when I apologised for being late, all they did was laugh.”

“I was confused, and asked what was so funny, and my dear Candy’s father put a hoof around my shoulders and said ‘Well son, let’s just say you’re not the only thing in this house running late!’.” Peach Seed finished, a wry smile on his face.

“Oh snap Sir. So it was a shotgun wedding then?”

“What? Oh no, no no no, when I finally clued in to what Golden Smith was talking about, I proposed to Candy on the spot. Honestly, I just thought the glow she had, and how soft and snuggly she was, was just, you know, young love. I do love my Mare when she’s a snuggly little bundle.”

Dappled looked at his C.O., then the massive Mare bullying the Changelings in the next room, then looked back to the beaming Peach Seed.

“I would never have guessed, sir.”

“Very droll son, but I’m docking your pay for that.”

“Dammit!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If the giant, fat, middle-aged Mare in-front of Chrysalis didn’t terrify the Changeling Queen on an instinctive level, she would have ordered her Guards to remove the bossy Mare from the compound, damn the commander’s feelings. Chrysalis bowed to no-one, especially not some fat, sun-browned old Mare who smelled like cider and wood-smoke who stirred feelings of inadequacy and nervousness within that Chrysalis had thought long since buried.

Yet the great and terrible Candy Apple was an expert on motherhood, having had nine children herself and helped raise several other foals in her large family, and had quickly and bluntly set Chrysalis straight on many of her misconceptions on her latest brood.

That they were not talking was understandable, given that they knew what the other Changelings around them wanted, and could be understood in turn, through the empathic transfer of the Hive Mind, but the knowledge that Ponies began to talk within a few weeks of their birth had shocked Chrysalis. Her own … foals … were only a month old, yet apparently they were supposed to be speaking already?

A part of her wondered if being born in the dark, desperate atmosphere of the collapsed castle where Twilight Sparkle had trapped Chrysalis and her surviving brood might have affected them, but the two black females and the white male seemed unaffected when she covered them in ‘darkness’ in the Hive Mind. They seemed to think that, however, was a cue for a game of ‘hide and seek’ and instead rushed to find hiding places around the room, one Female ‘hiding’ behind an annoyed-but-amused Candy Apple’s leg, the Male jumping head-first into the pile of rags that the fat old Mare had declared ‘unfit’ for anything but tinder or cleaning rags, leaving his lower half exposed and wriggling in the air, and the other Female clambered up onto one of her Guards and squirmed under its translucent wings, grinning cheekily at her mother.

“That … wasn’t what I meant, children.” Chrysalis said after several moments of thought. Candy Apple had insisted that she talk verbally to the foals, and encourage them to do the same. What would I do if they never learned to speak? All of my previous broods just … did. They would hatch, obey commands, and when they finished growing to full size they knew how to speak.

Three little pairs of eyes twinkled at her, and three little mouths split into mischevious grins. A dozen more larger, tired eyes gave her pitiful looks, begging for salvation, as they were harassed by the implacable voice of Candy Apple as they assembled a suitable ‘nursery’ for the Foals, consisting of plenty of padded surfaces, high walls the Foals could not climb over and no sharp edges anywhere. Not an easy task when all the Outpost could provide was office furniture and some spare blankets.

“Come here.”

The Foals kept grinning at her, sending her images of being caught and snuggled. The sensation was warm and sweet and made the dull ache in her head and the stabbing pains in her torso seem so far away. And she had to make them stop …

“No, you need to come here. We’re not playing right now.”

The smiles faltered, but the Foals kept hidden. A sense of confusion reached Chrysalis from their mind-glows, a sense of trepidation and fear. They reached for her with their mind-glows, but she remained … aloof.

It was, Chrysalis found, one of the hardest things she had ever done. Their bodies remained where they were, though their eyes glistened and their manes and tails drooped, but their mind-glows danced all around hers in the Hive-Mind, begging, pleading with emotions and images to be played with, to be consoled and loved.

She weakened, and assembled a complex image for them. The three of them coming to her, but only when they heard ‘come here’.

Instead the three Foals bolted from their ‘hiding places’ and rushed to her, throwing themselves against her chest and sobbing.

That was it for Chrysalis’s intentions to teach them to speak. She pulled them to her, both with hooves and her mind-glow, and saturated their mind-glows with love and images of them snuggled under her head in a warm, safe place.

The lessons could wait. She would not, could not, make any of her children feel she did not love them. Love for the Hive, from Changeling to their Queen and from the Mother to her Children, was the foundation of all they had built. It was more than food, it was their lifeblood, their religion, and to shatter that bond would be a true death-blow to the Hive.

They would understand, in time, what she was trying to convey to them. But for now, Chrysalis would let them be, and just suffuse their minds with the glow of her love for them until the sensations of confusion and anxiety from these, her last children, faded away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shining Armor felt like somebody had just thrown him into a pool filled with ice.

Chrysalis, the very same creature who had taken over his mind and locked the love of his life in the unmapped caves beneath Canterlot for weeks, had just surrendered to the Border Guard and was to be escorted to Canterlot for Princess Celestia to judge and deem if her offer of surrender would be accepted.

A part of the Stallion’s mind recoiled from the offer of being a witness at the trial, remembering the feelings of horror and self-loathing that had consumed him when he had realised that the Mare he had loved with every fibre of his being was not, in fact, Cadence. The memories of the time he and Chrysalis had spent together still tortured him, for they had been as happy as the times he had spent with Cadence, at least up until the wedding began, and his memories became unclear and confusing, proof, the experts said, that Chrysalis had begun to use actual mind-control magic on him.

Begun to use mind-control magic. Not from the start, only when things had started to get hectic around the wedding itself and the Princesses had gotten involved. Up until then he’d had no clue … not one red flag had gone up until Twilight had appeared and immediately recognised that his Special Somepony wasn’t who she looked like.

Another part of Shining’s mind burned with anger that Chrysalis wasn’t simply struck down like the enemy of the state she was, but Shining reeled in those emotions, knowing full well that Celestia would tolerate no such actions amongst the Ponies she counted as the protectors of her people.

And a third part wondered if there would be a plate in the palace after Cadence was done with her fit.

“That BITCH!” The Princess of Love bellowed for probably the thousandth time after receiving the coded message from Canterlot High Command, telekinetically flinging plate after crystal plate at the nearest wall.

Which ‘bitch’ she was referring to, neither Shining, who had taken shelter behind a lushly-padded fainting couch for shelter, nor the few servants who remained, ferrying the oldest and least-valuable plates into the room for Cadence to take her anger out on, were willing to risk attracting her ire by asking.

To say that Cadence took Chrysalis’s actions very personally did not do the Princess of Love justice. Not only did Cadence loathe Chrysalis for what she had done to Shining’s mind and imprisoning Cadence herself in a crystal cavern with only food, water and taunting accounts of how easily Chrysalis was fooling everypony, but on a darker and more humorous note, she seethed with the need for vengeance for Chrysalis almost ‘stealing’ her wedding away from her.

And that neither Celestia nor Luna, nor any of the Ponies that Cadence had come to call friends in the Canterlot Castle, had noticed the switch-over galled her to no end, even after the reports of how flawlessly Chrysalis had imitated her had been delivered to the distraught Princess.

Shining also felt it appropriate to not say anything about Chrysalis’s bedroom skills. He loved his wife, and didn’t want her to feel the need to ‘compete’ with a … bug … that Shining would have felt quite happy about loading into a catapult, tying anvils to her limbs and launching her into the middle of Gryphon territory.

That said, he felt rather awkward that he didn’t notice the sudden change in ‘Cadence’s’ behaviour from adorably shy to sexual tigress in the bedroom, or rather had been blind-sided by his ‘fiancee’s’ sudden take-charge attitude between the sheets.

“Of all the … how can they just … this is complete … arrogant, insufferably self-righteous …”

No, not letting Cadence know about Chrysalis’s ‘charms’ was definitely the right course of action, Shining decided as he saw a thrown plate neatly bisect an antique vase. Yes, definitely better to let her assume that he didn’t remember how her doppleganger knew more tricks than a stable of Las Pegasus working-mares.

“I … take it her Royal Highness is taking the news poorly?” Shining’s second-in-command, a diamond-coated Pony with the name of Adamant, asked nervously from a nearby doorway, poking his head around the opening and wincing as a trio of plates went whizzing through the air and smashed against a marble column, covering the ground with razor-sharp fragments of crystal.

“Actually, considering what she was like in therapy, she’s taking this surprisingly well.” Shining quipped, ducking back behind the couch as the air filled with another spray of crystalline shards. “That said, anypony with a black coat or a green mane or tail should probably take the week off. I can’t guarantee their safety right now.”

“Duly noted, sir.” Adamant squeaked, ducking out of the doorway and taking off at full speed as Cadence began shouting a stream of profanities that would have made a Minotaur sailor swoon.

“Honey, honey, don’t use the Royal Canterlot Voice, there are children in the city!” Shining urged from behind the overturned couch as Cadence’s violent swearing became loud enough to shake the surviving windows and ventured into the realms of the anatomically impossible.

“…-SPAWNED GRUB-LICKING ASS-MONGER OF A DISEASED SHE-MULE’S …”

Sighing, Shining ducked down behind the safety of the couch again, levitated a pen and a piece of paper over to his shelter, and began to pen a reply to the crisp, informal letter from General Rhinestone.

Dear General Rhinestone.

It’s going to take a few days to get Cadence to stop destroying the Crystal Palace’s supply of dishes and other breakables. Please inform Princess Celestia that we will be in Canterlot soon, but that it would be best to not allow either myself or my wife to be in the same room as the Changeling Queen without one of the other Princesses in attendance.

I, personally, would not lose any sleep over the Changeling Queen ending up in a noose if Princess Celestia finds her terms of surrender insufficient. I suspect, however, my wife wishes a far more visceral, and personally delivered, approach to the subject of Chrysalis’s punishment for her assault on Canterlot.

I will give you more concrete information on our time of arrival when Cadence stops filling the air with shrapnel that was formerly our best dinnerware and I may risk approaching her directly without taking a vase to the face.

With respect.

Shining Armor, Royal Consort of her Majesty, Princess Cadence.

P.S. I recommend stockpiling tubs of boysenberry ice-cream and strawberry cupcakes in our quarters in Canterlot ASAP. They are Cadence’s favourite comfort food and will help calm her down immensely during the proceedings.

“I only hope things will get less crazy soon.” Shining muttered, folding the letter up and tucking it into his breast pocket, waiting for Cadence to run out of dishes so he could make a break for his office and the precious vials of Dragon-Fire stored there for emergency correspondence such as this.

Chapter 26

CHAPTER 26

“Five bottles of body-wash?” Twilight said cheerily as she and Luna trotted down the street together, big, happy smiles plastered on their faces even though all Twilight wanted to do was get their shopping and teleport home to hide under the covers until Celestia fixed everything.

It didn’t help that they had four Royal Guards, all of them big, burly Earth Ponies that looked like they shared a common ancestor with Big Mac, escorting them everywhere, and everypony stopped to stare and point, or glare daggers, or shout encouragements.

Getting all the knackered Pegasi who had carried Celestia's 'strike force' into the Library after they had eventually been found, passed out in a pile in an abandoned work-shed on the outskirts of town had been a chore and a half, considering that all twenty-four Stallions had passed out into a coma-like state after flying for so long with only recovery-spells to keep them going, and Luna had insisted that only Twilight, the two Unicorn Guards who had been overseeing them and herself handle the sleeping Stallions to avoid any more potential public backlash.

Not like we don’t have enough of that, what with Carrot Top leading the charge against the Royal Guard for giving her a shock when she refused to back down until somebody paid for the carrots that got spilled onto the ground. Seriously, what is with the Ponies right now?

“Check!” Luna responded, using her magic to levitate a pen and checklist, even as the two Alicorns levitated their shopping-bags back and forth.

It was a test, of sorts, to see if their Sympathy was manageable. And to a degree, it was, although the contact of their magic touching around the bags’ handles still was … stimulating, it at least didn’t sent them into fits of shared stimulation on the ground.

Of course, that still meant they’d have to find someplace safe to do a proper test, such as combined spell-casting, to test and see if Luna’s rampaging Estrus would still drag them into each other’s hooves for some frenzied rutting …

“Spare blankets and pillows for up to three Ponies?” Twilight asked, blinking as she felt something twitch beneath her tail, and thanked Celestia for the social training to ensure she could keep her tail down directly behind her plot at all times. Please, please tell me I didn’t ‘wink’ at somebody …

“Check!” Luna replied again. And how is Luna supressing her hormones? A Mare in Estrus fills the air with hormones that lower inhibitions and raise the sex-drive of every Stallion that comes into contact with them, yet I can’t smell a thing!

“… Jumbo-sized bottle of mouthwash.” Twilight muttered, giving Luna an evil look. “Extra spicy, just like you demanded.

“Cheeeeeeeck!” The Lunar Princess shot back, wiggling her eyebrows at Twilight. “It says right on the bottle, Twilight. ‘Extra-Strength Cootie Protection’, see?”

“You’re hopeless … ah, two shower-head sets.”

“Definitely a check, and since they’re Earth Pony models, I can’t see you breaking these ones!”

“That was an accident, and thank Faust I didn’t cut anything when it collapsed … there.” Sighing, Twilight levitated the bags out of Luna’s grip and hoped that nopony noticed the shudder that went through both their coats when purple and midnight-blue magic mingled for a few seconds. “Eight do-it-yourself door-locks, ‘baby unicorn-proof’ models.”

“Oh, definitely check, we only spent fifteen minutes looking for ones with anti-magic cores in them.”

“Luna, I know it was frustrating finding them, and awkward trying to get around explaining why two Alicorns needed something like that, but I really, really don’t want Trixie creeping up on us while we’re asleep. Bad enough all the personal warding-spells I put into the Library got burnt away by the raw power of Celestia’s magic, but now I have to replace them from the ground up and somehow figure out a way to forbid Trixie from entering the bedroom while we’re sleeping without it being offensive or cruel.”

“How about just commanding her to stay in the basement with Spike? She seems to listen to you the most…Mistress Twilight!” Luna quipped, dragging the bags out of Twilight’s levitation field and giving Twilight a toothy grin when the purple Alicorn shot her a dirty look.

“Errr … I think I’d sleep better knowing I had some defences in place other than Trixie’s willpower. And she was calling me ‘Miss’. MISS. That’s just Rarity’s mind turning pink on us. Again.” Twilight muttered, silently vowing to throw every sloppy 2-bit romance novel the white Unicorn had ‘given’ her right back at the Fashionista when the opportunity presented itself.

“Oh, I think the fact she almost melted when you put a hoof on her shoulder when we left the library was very telling …”

“Noooooo no no no no no! Definitely not what was going on.”

“Then we can put all those locks back, there’s no reason for her to sneak into your bedroom, is there?”

“…. Faust, you’re going to rub my face in this forever, aren’t you?”

“Applejack did tell me you tend to be a little … dense … when it comes to relationships. Something about Cherliee and after-school courses?”

“She meant suspension and … I really, really don’t want to talk about that. Ugh. Memo to self: buy Cherilee something nice as an apology gift for being unable to pick up on the signals.”

“Well, you’re in luck, we’re passing a bakery, you can get her something sweet and fattening. My sister always goes straight for cake when things go horribly wrong.”

“Oh goody, Sugarcube Corner, and I can see Mrs Cake waving at me already. I guess I had better tell them Pinkie’s currently in Canterlot right now ...”

“Perhaps some cake for Pinkie when she comes back will soothe any ruffled feathers, or whatever it is Earth Ponies get when they’re upset.”

“Probably not a bad idea. Oh boy, I hope the Nobles aren’t picking on her too much …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You know, this was fun for the first hour or so, Miss Pie, but the game is over.” Discord sighed, snapping his fingers and teleporting away from the relentless Pink Demon, hopefully leaving her and her bottomless bottles of whipped cream behind in the maze, feeling space and time pinch around him as he created a door in mid-air, opened it, stepped through and closed it again.

He’d left the actual destination up to random chance, as befitted an Aspect of Chaos, feeling a mild flicker of frustration as he stepped out of the door … and into a different part of the Canterlot Maze.

Something isn’t right here. Discord grumbled to himself, summoning a cloud of cotton-candy above his head with another snap of his fingers, opening his jaws beyond natural limits to catch the downpour of chocolate milk and then dismissed the cloud with a third snap of his fingers. I should be in Prance, or Labryinthia, or maybe even across the Badlands, yet I keep coming back to this infernal Maze. I know the taste of Celestia’s magic … amongst other things these days … and it doesn’t feel like her, and Luna was never much good at creating magical traps in the material plane.

Perhaps the Purple Nerd? No, no, she isn’t powerful enough to do this to me, at least not yet. And the Elements of Harmony would just turn me to stone if their powers were used on me.

“Diiiiiiiiiiiiscord?” A happy, cheery voice shouted from somewhere nearby. Whipping his head around, Discord caught sight of a flash of pink above the green hedges, close to him, and felt all the hairs, feathers and scales of his body stand on end.

Impossible. I know what I’m seeing, but that’s impossible! I left her in the middle of the Maze, and even the fastest Earth Pony would have taken several minutes to get here, even if they knew the correct path to take!

“DIIIIIISCORD?”

“Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope, not having this, nope.” Discord muttered, feeling the beginning of a truly massive headache coming on, making a move to snap his fingers before pausing as an idea came to him.

Wait, wait, wait a second. I know planning isn’t my strong point here, but every time I use my power of chaos, she finds me. Sooooo … run away, but without using magic this time! Dropping down onto his belly, the Chaos Aspect literally slithered away, sliding under and through hedges, aiming towards Canterlot Castle, where surely he’d find some nice, dark, impossibly-difficult-to-find hidey-hole.

Impossibly, the Pink Demon bounced right past him, apparently covering a distance that surely would have even taxed a professional sprinter to match in less than a minute, still shouting for him in that innocent, cheery voice, and Discord redoubled his efforts to wriggle to safety.

Somehow, against all odds, both probably and impossible, one of his cultists must have managed to tap into Discord’s latency divine energies and imbued himself with Chaos-Powers, and the powers had been passed down the line, skipping generations here and there and flaring up as unusual abilities, never the same ‘gift’ twice.

And the Aspect of Laughter’s abilities apparently included a muddled form of precognition and the ability to teleport.

Ugh, Tirek and the others really will never let me live it down if they ever hear about me crawling like a worm to escape one Pony. Discord groaned internally, risking a burst of magic as he reached the outskirts of the Maze after a few heart-stopping moments of being nearly discovered by the Pink Demon. Give Discord an hour with any Pony and a copious amount of time to pass without anything fun to do, and he’d either drive them insane or have them laughing hysterically in the corner. But not the ‘Pink Demon’. She urged him on, because she didn’t follow the social norms, and thus could get the humour of his chaos.

If only she wasn’t so clingy! Ever since this all-too-physical fling with Celestia had started, and with Fluttershy’s ‘coaching’ on how to be a good friend, Discord found he had become leery of his usual physical slapstick with the Ponies, because he didn’t know what the right response when contact was made. For the first time in his existence as ‘Discord’, the Chaos Aspect was worried, really worried, about what mere mortals felt when he pranked them. Was pinching cheeks merely condescending or matronly? Was slapping a plot a ‘come hither’ or just douchebaggery?

He sure as spit knew that touching a Unicorn’s horn was a definite no-no, just like a Pegasi’s wings, but that had more to do with his ‘adventures’ with Celestia, and the thought of doing that to strangers, Ponies or otherwise, filled Discord with a weird, awkward sense of nervousness.

“Di-Discord?!” A patrol of Royal Guards jumped in their armour as Discord slunk in through a third-storey window, his eagle’s talon held in-front of his face in the universal gesture for silence. “What are you doing here?”

“Boys, do me a favour and don’t tell the pink pony that’s stalking me that I’m hiding in the kitchens.” Discord winked and disappeared with a snap of his fingers.

“What in the …” The lead Guard-Pony asked out loud, when a pink blur shot in through the same window, bouncing off the walls and ceilings, a manic grin on it’s face.

“I heard Discord? Where’d he go! We’re playing hide and seek, an’ he’s reaaaaally good, an’ I gotta catch a train back to Ponyville, so I gotta catch him soon!”

“Uh … kitchens.” The guard-pony said after a few moments of awkward silence, staring at Pinkie Pie’s hooves with beads of sweat appearing on his face, pointing a hoof in the general direction of Canterlot’s massive kitchens, and going slack-jawed as the pink blur shot off in that direction, bouncing off any available surface, be they floor, ceiling or wall.

“Real smooth Hoss, real smooth.” One of the other Guards muttered. “Bro-Code, Hoss, gotta remember the Bro-Code.”

“I … I’m not paid enough to deal with the Element of Laughter. You haven’t seen her file.” The lead Guard-Pony shot back, shaking like a wet dog. “It states, clearly, in the biggest letters you’ve ever seen, “DO NOT MAKE EYE-CONTACT, DO NOT ASK FOR A PARTY, DO NOT SAY YOU ARE FEELING DOWN, BACK AWAY SLOWLY OR DISTRACT WITH BAKED GOODS." And why would Discord say that to us, knowing that we’re supposed to be keeping an eye on him, and he’s always giving us the slip for fun.”

“Yeah, but you just sent it after Discord, right after he asked us not to. That’s … kinda low, even if we’re supposed to be keeping an eye on him.” A third Guard muttered.

“I just said I don’t think I did that. Why would Discord say where he was going if he didn’t want us to tell the Element Bearer where he was?” The lead Guard-Pony said, before his helmet lifted off his head and his mane was ruffled by an invisible paw.

“Ho-ho-hoooo, Celestia wasn’t bragging about her Guards after all! Well done and all, but I’m getting out of here before the Pink Demon eats all the sugar in the kitchens and gets ...” Discord said with a big, toothy grin, before his eyes opened wide in shock, and the Guard’s helmet dropped from a suddenly-limp claw. “Oh fuzz-buckets, I did not think this one through. Again.”

“What?” The Guards all shouted, looking around for some world-shattering terror that could put a look of utter horror on Discord’s face.

“We just sent Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter, an Earth Pony with Chaos Powers, to a place with enough sugar to supercharge her abilities for days.”

The Guards looked at the serpentine chimera, then each other, and then the hallway where Pinkie Pie had disappeared like a hyperactive ping-pong ball.

“Oh BUCK!” The Guards all shouted as one and charged down the hallway after the Element Bearer’s echoing giggles.

“….” Discord held a talon up to offer a parting shout of advice to the Guards, before blinking a few times, tucking his hands behind his back and began walking back to Celestia’s quarters, whistling nonchalantly as he did so.

Time to hide until this all blows over. Luna’s closet ought to be safe from the Pink Demon, and little Woona gets so flustered whenever I tried to take a peek. I wonder what she’s hiding in there!

Chapter 27

CHAPTER 27

“Princess Luna, Princess Twilight, thank you for coming.” Mayor Mare bowed low, the mayor looking extremely dishevelled and tired as a crowd of Ponies gathered out the front of the smoke-blacked building that had once housed Ponyville’s somewhat bloated public servant department. “The Ponies are nearly assembled, and the Royal Guards have assumed their positions … we aren’t going to have another battle on our hands, are we?”

“Nay, Mayor Mare, the threat has passed for now.” Luna gave her best ‘Court Smile’ to the battered Earth Pony, wincing as she saw the Pony’s shoulder’s sag with relief. “Celestia herself is escorting the Fiend back to Canterlot to a very specific cell designed to hold extremely powerful individuals for long periods of time.”

“That’s … that’s good. Okay, okay, deep breaths.” The mayor muttered, taking several long, measured breaths before looking up. “Princesses … I don’t know what plan you and Princess Celestia have come up with to try and smooth this over, but there are a lot of confused Ponies out there, and confused Ponies look for answers, or failing that, scape-goats. I don’t mean to tell you how to perform your Royal Duties, but I’d suggest giving them some sort of relief, or else there’s going to be a lot of hard feelings come tomorrow. My contacts in Canterlot are telling me the papers are already running stories about Unicorn brutality on my constituents, completely ignoring the fact that Celestia had invoked the Crisis Act and demanded Ponies leave the area.”

“Oh no …” Twilight said, wings drooping. “Let me guess, it’s the Shadow Court, the political party that Blueblood’s father leads?”

“T’would seem so, Twilight. Those vultures will stop at nothing to discredit my sister. An irony that they would use so-called ‘Unicorn’ brutality as a weapon against her, when they themselves dream of Unicorn domination over the other two Tribes.”

“Well, there’s a lot of reporters out there demanding answers, your Highnesses, and they’re the sort of scum who’ll try to paint this in the most negative light they can to get a top-selling story, and some of our more eccentric residents are up in arms as well.” The mayor explained as the leader of the unit of Royal Guards tapped on the microphone and started with the long list of rules for a Royal Interview. “I do not envy either of you. It’s a den of Timber-Wolves out there.”

“We beat a soul-sucking Fiend, brought Friendship to the Aspect of Chaos, purged a Nightmare Spirit, defeated a Dark Sorcerer turned into living shadow and helped defeat a Changeling Queen. How hard can it be?” Twilight muttered as Luna coughed, put on her ‘Court’ face and ascended the short flight of steps up onto the podium.

Oh Twilight, you have no idea what we’re in for.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dear Ponies, you all have many questions, and we have much to do today, so I will make this quick, then you may ask your questions.” Luna spoke loudly, ignoring the odd cat-call and boo-ing from a handful of Ponies at the back with only an annoyed flick of her ears. “Today, a Succuponi that was formerly Sunset Shimmer, a known Unicorn supremacist and Traitor to the Realm, snuck into Ponyville with the intent of corrupting Princess Twilight Sparkle into one of her own depraved kind. Through the efforts of Celestia and a team of Canterlot’s best combat-mages, as well as Twilight Sparkle herself, the fiend was subdued without being able to harm anypony, and is currently being shipped back to Canterlot, where she will be placed into the Cell of Ultimate Confinement until we have a clearer understanding of how she re-entered our world, and if it is possible to reverse her transformation from Pony into Fiend. You, the Pony in the red base-ball cap, you may ask the first question.”

“Thank you, your Highness. What is your statement to claims of brutality towards Earth Ponies by the Unicorns Celestia brought with her?”

“The only reason the Guards were forced to use their taser-spells was because Celestia had invoked the Crisis Act, and those same Ponies had refused to obey not only my sister, possibly the single highest authority in the realm, but the Royal Guards she had with her, Mayor Mare of Ponyville and the assembled civil servants of the town, whose only orders to the civilians was to flee the town to avoid them being injured or possibly killed in the fighting.” The Lunar Princess spoke up, loudly and with more than a hint of contempt in her voice, frowning slightly as her gaze slid across the assembled Ponies. “Perhaps I need to remind you all that under the Crisis Act, which to my knowledge, has only needed to be invoked three times in the past thousand years, any Pony who refuses to obey the commands of a soldier, civil servant or member of the Royalty faces a penalty of six months of hard labour unless they can prove that the commands were unjust or were not in the spirit of protecting the civilian population from harm. And I doubt 'stubborn-ness' counts as a valid reason for disobedience during such a time of crisis.”

“That’s not answering the question, your Highness.” The cap-wearing Reporter shouted back.

“No, it is not, but I am getting to it. To the question of ‘brutality’, yes the Royal Guards involved will be subjected to the same independent inquiries that all soldiers and guards-ponies are when incidents of civilians and military personnel come into conflict. That said, I personally cannot see any of them being charged, given that if the Ponies claiming brutality had fulfilled their legal obligations in the first place, to obey the orders to run away from the rampaging Demon in the middle of their town, they would never have been in any danger in the first place and never have had to have been driven off with anti-riot spells.” The Lunar Princess’s voice dripped with contempt, her eyes shooting to several Ponies in the crowd who showed scorch-marks on their coats, none of whom met her eyes for long. “Perhaps in my absence, much has changed much amongst Ponykind, but how did some of you lose the ability to comprehend when you are in mortal danger?”

“That’s hardly fair!” Another Pony up at the back of the crowd shouted. Carrot Top, if Twilight wasn’t mistaken, one of the more combative Ponies in Ponyville, if her interactions with the Apple Family were to be taken seriously.

“Fair, little Pony? How is it fair that the Guardsponies were forced to physically evict Ponies from the scene, repeatedly in some cases, after Princess Celestia personally told them to, and I quote, ‘Run for their lives!’. Considering the situation involved a high-level binding spell that would have been visible from the other side of Equestria, a giant pillar of condensed sunlight several miles tall and wider than the Ponyville Library? How is it fair that the Royal Guardsponies were maimed by the Succuponi’s spell-fire because they were protecting the Ponies who, instead of following logic and common sense and obeying the Royal Command, chose instead to try to distract Princess Celestia as she tried to secure a Fiend with the capacity to infect dozens of Ponies with physical contact and turn them into her own kind? How is it fair that Celestia herself was almost killed because one Pony would not shut up about …” Luna paused, pulled a sheaf of papers from the cubby-hole in the podium and read them quickly. “… ah yes, the all-important question of ‘Who is going to recompense me for not being able to sell my carrots’.”

Twilight felt guilty about the surge of amusement she felt watching Carrot Top wilt under the stunned and angry looks of the Ponies around her.

“And lest we forget, a pair of young fillies demanding that Celestia sign their Cutie Marks and whom needed four Guards to drag away from Celestia, one of whom threw such a fit that she proceeded to bite the Guardspony carrying her so badly he required several stitches to his throat afterwards.” At the back of the pack of Ponies, Filthy Rich coloured heavily and swatted the pouting Diamond Tiara at his side across the back of her head, his mouth moving, but too far away for Twilight to read his lips. “And of course the reporter who demanded an interview with Celestia in the middle of her casting a spell so powerful that it made her bleed from the horn. AS SHE WAS RISKING HER OWN LIFE TO SAVE YOU ALL. Next. Question.”

Luna tapped the sheaf of papers and gave an expectant look to the reporter, who looked decidedly nervous, looking around himself and noting that all eyes were upon him, the sole Pony standing up at that point.

“Your Highness?” A Mare on the other side of the gathering raised a hoof.

“Yes, the young Mare with the … bird-hat?” Luna pointed to the Mare, who wore some bizarre, overly-adorned frilly hat with a massive, sequinned brim and long white feathers that made it look as if an albino peacock had nested on her head, as the cap-wearing Reporter sunk back down onto his seat, shaking nervously.

“Why were you and Princess Twilight in Ponyville?”

“Ah, I was wondering when that would come up. Twilight and I were in the Everfree Forest, where Twilight has been training to handle her greatly-increased magic. The properties of the wild magic of the region would disperse any uncontrollable magic ‘surges’ Twilight might suffer, and the area’s proximity to Ponyville and a train-station, allowed for easy access back to Canterlot via a land-route if the situation required it.”

“Were you not concerned that Twilight could have been a danger to the town? If her magic had grown so strong it was ‘surging’, wouldn’t someplace like the Badlands be more suitable for somepony that dangerous?” The mare with the odd-looking hat asked, scowling at Twilight. “Why is Princess Celestia still showing such blatant favouritism to one Pony, when so many younger Ponies who are much better suited to the position of Royal Student are ignored or turned down?”

Wait, what? Twilight thought, blinking in surprise at the venom in the Mare’s voice.

“Twilight Sparkle’s magic is not a danger, not with the wild magic of the Everfree Forest counteracting her spells, as well as my own efforts to help her understand her new power, and she has already grasped most of her new limitations.” Luna replied, her voice carefully neutral as she locked eyes with the venomous Mare. “In regards to Celestia not taking on a new student, my sister has chosen to not take on any more students until Twilight is fully prepared for the many arduous duties her new role as a member of the Royal Family will entail. I would also point out that her doing so is not custom nor some sort of immutable tradition, but simple Celestia noticing somepony of unusual talent and taking them under her wing.”

“While I would not dare to consider I know my sister’s mind, perhaps there is simply nopony among the Ponies petitioning her who have the potential or talent that would necessitate Celestia taking the time out of running Equestria to take over their training personally.”

Ow. I think that Mare will need some long sleeves for that burn. Twilight fought to keep from making any expression as the furious, bird-hatted Mare turned a shade of red that would have made a tomato proud and stormed away. Now that I think about it, Celestia hasn’t taken on any other students, and I’m already nineteen …

“Next Question. You, the Gentlepony with the black-and-pink mane.”

“Princess Luna, what do you have to say about the rumours that you’re a Vampony, not an Alicorn.”

“… What in Faust’s name are you talking about, and how does this have anything to do with what happened in Ponyville today?”

“Well, you’re out in the sun and your mane and tail are sparkling …”

“… My mane and tail are representations of my dominion over the night and all things that dwell in the sky then. You know, like stars, moons, comets? Things that twinkle, and dare I say it, sparkle? Next Question, and please stay on topic.”

“Princess Luna, Princess Luna! Over here!”

“Yes, the Pony in the floral vest.” Luna pointed to the new speaker, ignoring the pleading eyes of the pink-and-black maned Stallion.

Oh dear Faust no, is he holding that horrible … ugh, it’s a ‘Twi-bite’ omnibus. No wonder, that author tried to claim all Bat-Ponies were Vamponies, and Luna was the Queen of them all. Well … she wasn’t wrong about Luna being the supreme leader of all Thestrals, but by Celestia’s Beard I’d love to set every last one of those horrid books she writes on fire and put a geas on her to never write or dictate a story again!

“Will the Royal Family be compensating Ponies for lost business due to Princess Celestia disrupting trade by fighting this ‘succuponi’ in the middle of town? And wasn’t that very reckless of her?”

“Uh, Luna, can I field this one?” Twilight asked, stepping up to Luna’s side as she noticed a very large vein in the side of Luna’s head throbbing madly.

“Yes. Yes you may, Twilight, consider this a test on how to handle a hostile press-release.” Luna grated, stepping to the side and then back two steps, leaving Twilight alone at the podium.

“Ah … right, well … Unfortunately, Sunset was already in town, and nobody realised it was her due to being disguised and wearing a set of magical garments that supressed her magical signature.” Twilight stammered into the microphone, looking out over the staring Ponies with a sinking feeling in her guts. “When we realised who and what she was, she was already in the Golden Oaks library’s basement, with Luna and myself trying to keep her contained until Princess Celestia could arrive to take Sunset into custody.”

“Surely you could have taken her outside of the town, however? You are famous for your ability to teleport after all, Twilight, oh, forgive me, Princess Twilight Sparkle.” The Mare smiled falsely at Twilight, who blinked back in surprise.

What is with these Ponies? Twilight thought to herself, aghast at the vitriolic attitudes on display. It’s like we’re on trial before a lynch-mob!

“Uhm, you’re correct that I can teleport, but I can only teleport myself, and maybe one or two passengers. I was only able to teleport myself, Rarity, Applejack and Spike a few meters away from the library before we suffered serious mana-burn and were ejected back into real-space.” Fighting the urge to snap back at the Mare, Twilight explained herself, hoping that the next questions would be considerably less … accusatory. “Also, according to the ancient texts and Luna’s own warnings, Succuponies were able to corrupt Mares into others of their kind via mouth-to-mouth contact, with an unknown incubation period before the victim would begin to morph into another Succuponi. And I can only teleport another being that I’m touching when I cast the spell. Throwing myself into a teleport with a hostile being who is almost as strong as I am magically would be suicide under the best of circumstances, let alone these ones.”

“How so?” The floral-vest-wearing Mare asked, as dozens of reporters scribbled down on note-pads frantically.

“Well, assuming that the Succuponi didn’t take the opportunity to just make the contact and corrupt me before I could even start the teleport, the teleportation spell breaks a Pony down into a … let’s call it a cloud of magical particles embedded with the ‘details’ of the Pony who is being teleported, and sends it hurtling forwards through Equestria’s ley-lines until the spell is cancelled, the caster’s magical energies are exhausted or some other phenomina occurs and they are ejected from the ley-line.”

“Now, you add multiple life-forms to that spell, and the difficulty increases dramatically. You have to fit all those ‘details’ of the life-forms within the spell without mixing them up, or leaving ‘details’ out of the cloud, and then send it through the ley-lines. It’s a lot harder, there’s a huge number of risks involved, and I’m one of the few Ponies who holds a S+ Class teleportation license, which gives me the authority to make a multi-being teleportation jump. Ponies who can’t handle the theory aren’t allowed to even study the spells because there’s a lot of room for some very … squickish ends if you’re not careful with the spell. Ponies fusing into walls, trees, even other creatures because they didn’t set the spell to avoid pre-existing matter at the designated ‘expel’ zone, Ponies teleporting multiple organisms without the right precautions and killing themselves and their passengers when they are reformed into a single body ...”

“If I had cast the teleportation spell, and Sunset Shimmer tried to dispel it mid-teleport, we could have blown apart and taken most of Ponyville with us as our magic detonated from the backlash of the failed spell, we could have gotten halfway into the ley-lines before the spell failed and been dispersed into the ley-lines, releasing Alicorn-magic and corruptive Succuponi-magic into the environment, causing who-knows-what damage to the animals and Ponies nearby, we could have fused together and become an unstoppable monstrosity, given that I am the Bearer of the Element of Magic and an immortal Alicorn to boot, and without the Elements to fight back, the Sunset/Twilight Fusion could have caused tremendous damage before the Royal Guards could have taken it … me … down, well let’s just say that trying to draw Sunset Shimmer out of the town had a lot more cons to it than keeping her contained in a magically reinforced basement, away from a town full of innocent, unsuspecting Ponies.”

Twilight had the profound ‘honor’ of watching several score Ponies all drop their note-pads from limp hooves, throw up or faint dead away.

“Too much information?” Twilight asked, looking to Luna for support, who had also turned a very pale shade under her dark fur.

“Possibly, Twilight. Incidentally, we are never teleporting together. Ever.”

“Luna, I can do~”

“EVER. I enjoy spending time with you Twilight, but I do not wish to be ‘joined at the hip’ with you in that manner!”

“Oh …” Twilight said, looking back over the crowd of pale-faced or retching Ponies with a nervous, twitching grimace spreading across her face. “Uh … next question?”

Chapter 28

CHAPTER 28

It was days like today that Celestia found herself grateful beyond words to the Castle Staff.

Getting Sunset Shimmer into the Castle had been a nightmare with the media out in force and the jilted Nobility she had sent running before coming running to demand she attend to their demands before anything else happened.

Knots of Nobles were diverted down corridors that would force them to take round-about routes back to Celestia by packs of maids dusting ‘in ranks’ in the halls, the reporters had buckets of soapy water tipped on them ‘by accident’ and were then dragged away to the Royal Baths to be cleaned up, and generally anypony that tried to get in Celestia’s way found themselves tangled up in what amounted to a flurry of cleaning.

Definitely giving everypony in the cleaning division another thank-you present at the end of the month. Celestia thought, smiling even as her body ached with the desire to rest. Flying all the way to Ponyville at top speed, and then being bounced around in the armored wagon guarding the comatose Sunset Shimmer had not done her any favours, immortal body or not. I am going to be unable to move my wings at all tomorrow … and I do not need any more stress today. Once I get the word that Sunset is safely locked within the Cell of Ultimate Confinement by the fresh Mages who were waiting for us at the train-station, and the P.R. Department gives me the final version of my ‘speech’ for tomorrow’s press-conference, I’m going to hunker down in my room, order five buffet-tables of cake and a few bottles of something alcoholic, and go back to bed to watch something sappy. I’m going to have a hell of a day tomorrow when the media decides to turn this into a three-ring circus …

And then there’s Chrysalis surrendering as well. We’ll … put her in the North-Wing of the castle, under tight surveillance and heavy guard. And keep Cadence and Shining in the South-Wing … also with heavy guard presence. I would not put it past the Changelings to make a hostage-gambit, and the report on Cadence’s mental state from the therapists did state she has a host of issues with Changelings still.

“Your Highness.” One of the Butlers approached Celestia as she slowly made her way to her quarters. “My deepest apologies, but we need you to assist us … it appears that Discord has set up residence in Luna’s quarters.”

An irrational flash of jealousy, and then a surge of fear about what Discord could possibly be up to in Luna’s personal rooms, surged through Celestia. Odds were it was going to be a prank of some epic kind, and the last thing anypony needed was Luna chasing Discord through the halls, covered in GAK or turned into a Dragon again, but a small, primitive part of Celestia’s mind tried to tell her Discord was ‘upgrading’ to a younger Mare, irrational and petty as it sounded.

“Oh of course. Please, lead on.” Celestia sighed gustily and followed after the butler, hoping nopony was noticing how her wings drooped or how her mane and tail ‘flowed’ sluggishly.

All she wanted was to go into her room and calm down, but nooooo, there was always another disaster, another problem that needed the Princess’s direct intervention.

We actually haven’t … talked … about where our relationship is going. Celestia mused as her hooves clacked on the cold marble tiles of the palace floor. I don’t think Discord would want an out-and-out relationship … but is that all it is? Physical affection? Just an outlet for us both? Comfort for our loneliness?

And Celestia’s mind went back to Pinkie Pie’s unexplained teleportation into her bedroom.

“So that’s how Equestria was made!”

Perhaps a quick trip to the Royal Physician tomorrow for a discreet check would not be a bad idea. I would dearly love a child, but … an Alicorn like myself and a Chimera like Discord? Are we even biologically compatible in that regard? Does Discord’s chaotic nature make us conceiving together more or less likely?

Would Discord even want to be a father? Would my Ponies ever accept the child … I could not bear to bring a child into this world and have it despised by my little Ponies.

“Here, your Majesty. I apologise for this, but given who it is, where he is and what he is doing, we felt the best solution was to have as few individuals involved as possible.”

Well, doesn’t that sound just positively damning!

“I … see. Do you know what is going on in there?” Celestia asked softly, putting a hoof to the door-handle and giving the butler a searching look. “What exactly am I walking into here?”

“Only one of the maids saw Discord enter the room, went in after him and then ran out, screaming something about ‘the forbidden closet’ and Discord laughing hysterically.” The butler replied, looking rather nervously at the door. “Apparently Princess Luna extracted an oath from the Head-Maid to never go into her closet, and it’s become something of a ‘haunted mystery’ to the Maids.”

“A haunted what-now?”

“Apparently the rumors say the closet contains a shrine to a foal Luna was pregnant with when she was possessed by the Nightmare Spirit and lost when she was banished to the moon, or that it’s the secret entrance to her lair where she plots world domination and is building an army of the Undead, or she found an entrance to another reality where monstrous creatures and the souls of the damned lie in wait for any fool to break the Princess’s decree and enter the forbidden zone.”

“… Nnngh. No, I know precisely what Discord has found, and the closet is just that, an ordinary walk-in-closet, though that said, I would prefer if the maids remained out of there, purely to appease Luna.” The Solar Princess sighed and opened the door a crack, noting that the blinds had been pulled up and the windows opened to allow the room to air. Good. At least the maids are cleaning the rest of the room! The last thing I need is for Luna’s quarters to be considered ‘haunted’ or cursed because of their occupant! “Please ask the Ponies to keep their distance for the next few minutes, I expect Discord to have one of his better pranks lined up for the first person to go into Luna’s room. Oh, and ask the Head-Maid to have a bath drawn for me, just in case it involves banana-cream pies or chocolate rain.”

“As you wish, your Majesty.” The butler bowed and began trotting backwards, head still lowered in deference.

Oh-kaaaay.

Pushing the door open slowly, Celestia forced her fatigue and irritation down, looking for a clue for the prank no doubt awaiting her or Luna.

Instead, all she saw was the blankets lifted off of Luna’s bed, and Discord’s tail flicking back and forth from under the bed.

“Oh my, oh my, Luna, I never knew!”

Shall I prank the pranker? Or just see what he’s up to? Celestia wondered, creeping up on the flicking tail, closing the door to Luna’s room behind her with her magic. Discord is probably bored from not being able to cause ‘enough’ chaos, so probably some pranking is in order.

Celestia dropped down into a crouch, opening her mouth slightly and waiting for the right moment, before lunging and ‘mouthing’ Discord’s tail from the side, just before the tuft of fur on the very tip of the extremity, causing Discord to yelp in surprise, his head shooting up into the air.

“Well hello there, Discord.” Celestia gave a small grin, letting Discord’s tail pop out of her mouth as she walked up to Luna’s bed and crawled across it to stare down at Discord, who had what appeared to be … picture books, or were they comics? Yes, some sort of comic in his paws. “What have you got there?”

“Celestia … did … did you just prank me?” Discord said in a strangled voice, covering the open pages of the comic with his lion-paw.

“Well, I know you’ve been doing your best to fit in and befriend Ponies, so I thought it would only be fair, as your friend, to try and play with you in turn.” Celestia offered, feeling a surge of relief as Discord’s look of surprise spread into a broad grin, his muzzle bumping hers for a few moments as the two Immortals enjoyed a simple moment together. “What are you reading? I thought Luna detested comics?”

“Oh Celestia my dear, these are not comics, these are manga. Stories from Neighpone, actually.” Discord said, still grinning, as a disembodied eagle-claw dragged another of the strange, book-like comics out from under Luna’s bed and deposited it in-front of Celestia. The cover seemed to be some sort of winged Pony with impossibly long, spikey hair and an outrageously too-tight outfit.

A quick flick through the first few pages seemed to tell the story of a plain, almost cripplingly shy Mare going through high-school in Neighpone, being bullied because she was not athletically skilled and was less than endowed, physically, with ‘female charms’, being over-looked by the Stallions and coming home to an empty house until a …

“Wait, that Pony on the cover is a Stallion?” Celestia muttered out loud, going back to the front cover, then back to the first page when the ‘title-Stallion’ appeared. He looked far too … effeminate?

“They’re just too cute for words, right? All these stories about Mares and Stallions in situations totally out of their control, all these fantasies about being rescued or finding somepony absolutely stunning to save them or make them feel worthy …” Discord chortled as he went back to reading the comic beneath his paw. “I wonder, did Luna pick up these manga because she enjoyed the stories, or because she identified with the Ponies in them?”

That rocked Celestia, emotionally at least. She had noticed that Luna struggled to make friends, and that Ponies seemed to hold Luna at arm’s length at best before that Nightmare Night in Ponyville. Even now, however, Ponies within Canterlot and the other, bigger cities seemed to cling to a very negative image that had its origins more in the media’s insatiable hunger for ‘gripping’ stories than any effort on Luna’s behalf to drive them away.

The thought that Luna, with all her power, might feel personally weak and vulnerable was not new to Celestia, but it was a phase that the Solar Princess had thought her younger sister had gotten past already.

“And you say you found these … mang-hah under Luna’s bed, Discord?”

“In her closest, actually.”

“Really? Well, I would have thought she … wait, where in the closet?”

“Oh, you know, behind a cunningly crafted false wall where Luna has been storing every game made by Ponykind, and even a few Minotaur and Griffon ones, and that horrid box full of terrible things.”

“…Oh. So you …”

“Found it, yes. And have been filling my mind with girly-comics to try and purge the memory from my mind.”

“… Oh …”

For close to a minute, there was only the sounds of Celestia shifting awkwardly on the bed, trying desperately to come up with some sort of method to make the situation less awkward, and Discord steadfastly reading his ‘comic’.

“I … have to apologise, Discord. Those technically aren’t Luna’s, ermmmm, toys, so to speak.”

“Celestia, I know that you are many things, but the sort of Pony that would hide a box large enough to fit two Ponies inside, filled with sex-toys and devices who functions I don’t even want to think about, inside your own sister’s closet?” Discord said in a light voice, even as uncontrollable shudders moved up and down his neck. “No, no those are Luna’s, no doubt about it. I suppose it’s my own fault, considering she had wrapped the box in several cases worth of duct-tape and built a false wall to hide it behind, but still … it’s always the ones you least expect, isn’t it?”

“Ah … you’re half-right. You see, before Luna was possessed, she had become very … depressed about love and relationships. The Royal Consorts she was forced to take to help keep political stability in Equestria were more interested in political power than sharing their lives with her, and more than once she came running into my chambers in tears after finding them rutting her very own maids in their marriage-bed.” Celestia explained awkwardly, pushing a big fold of sheets between her fore-hooves and kneading it with her hooves as she spoke, unable to look at Discord out of embarrassment. “After she found the last of her Consorts bragging to his brothers how easy it was to make Luna withdraw from Court if they upset her, and thus allow the Nobles to push through their own amendments without her around to use her veto powers … Luna snapped.”

“Oh dear. I mean, I’m new to this whole ‘sex’ thing, but there seems to be a massive amount of emotional stuff tied to it, isn’t there?”

“Especially for the Mare, or female, yes Discord, there is.” Celestia sighed, hestitating for a moment as she felt Discord join her on Luna’s bed and put his bat-wing over her barrel. “Well, needless to say, I wish I had been paying more attention to Luna’s problems instead of … well, I suppose we were both too upset with the situation at our hooves to pay attention to each other. Luna took a week from Court, gathered the best scholars of the time and ensconced herself in the Royal Archives for a week before calling for a Moot, which forced every Clan in the nation to send at least one member to be a witness.”

“In front of what amounted to the entire nation, Luna publicly outed every transgression of her Royal Consorts and invoked her Right of Crown, citing their unfaithfulness to her also meant they lacked the loyalty to their people needed for such a high rank. As punishment, the Royal Consorts were gelded in public, the Maids they had been rutting with were placed under a curse that would render them barren as punishment for betraying their master, and the entire Clans of all the offending parties were exiled from Equestria as punishment for the actions of their family-members and a warning to the other Clans that they would be held accountable for the actions of their own kinsponies.”

Celestia looked up to see Discord looking at her with bulging eyes and his mouth silently moving.

“Legally, she was within her rights to have the Consorts gelded and exiled, as a Royal Consort swears a binding oath to take nopony but their Princess into their bed upon pain of death when they take up the position, but Luna did abuse her Right of Crown when she exiled the families of the Ponies who had wronged her.” Celestia explained, reaching out with a forehoof for Discord’s paw, which felt very cold and clammy. “That said, the Ponies at the Moot argued that her punishments were far too severe until Luna ‘dropped’ the Moon to just a few miles above the Moot and let the ‘gravity’ of the situation sink in. She then gave an hour-long speech, and used the Royal Canterlot Voice with a great deal of passion at that, about the virtues of loyalty and fidelity that the Pegasi, Unicorns and Earth Ponies had made such a fuss about to her Thestrals, and why it was a very poor idea for married Ponies to cheat on their partners, especially since Luna could see their dreams and would be taking a personal interest in such matters in the foreseeable future. After that, we saw a remarkable decline in feuds between the Clans over their Nobles playing swords-and-sheaths with each-other’s wives, but Luna also went from the ‘Lesser’ Sister to the ‘Feared’ Sister, as well as souring her own view on physical and romantic relationships.”

“Oh bother. So how does this tie into the box of horrors?” Discord asked, his lion’s paw wrapping around Celestia’s hoof in turn, even if it was still cold and sweaty.

“Luna … chose to deny herself her ‘womanhood’ after that, claiming that it was too painful to risk allowing one of the Nobility into her life in such a fashion, after which she used a rather dangerous spell to trick her body into ‘denying’ her own estrus. So when she came back with me to Canterlot after being purified of the Nightmare Spirit’s influence, I had no idea if the spell she had cast had failed or if she had kept it going. Or if it had failed on the moon and she had spent the past thousand years sculpting moon-rock into … various shapes.” Celestia paused for an awkward laugh. “Sooo … I asked a decorated officer in the Royal Guard to discreetly go to the Red Lantern Street and see what he could procure for a Mare who ‘had not had a lover in quite some time’. And he came back with that box, handed me the receipt and swore that he’d rather spend the next decade on the Gryphon/Pony border than set one hoof into that part of town again.”

“And her response was to … wrap the box and all its contents in enough duct-tape to immobilize an angry Orc and personally create a rather impressive fake wall to hide it behind.” The Aspect of Chaos muttered, turning his long neck to look at the closet with an expression of wary amusement.

“Luna has always been rather … well, I know that a long period of abstinence by a Mare can make them rather … demanding in the bedroom …”

“I would never have noticed.” Discord muttered, his bat-wing giving Celestia a little squeeze, which made her giggle.

“I am sorry! Well, I knew Luna would be unable to approach anypony so soon, especially not after the whole Nightmare Moon debacle, so I thought that perhaps the toys would help ease the physical side of things. And I never asked if they were used because … well, she’s my sister, and there are things I really, really don’t want to know about my sister.”

“So why don’t we just take the box and throw it into a lake somewhere? From the way it was wrapped up and hidden away, I doubt that Luna has any interest in what the box contains!”

“Because … Luna has asked for the box to be delivered to where she is staying … with Twilight.”

“So the Pink Demon was right then? Your little sister and your student have tumbled out of the closet together then?”

“It is merely a side-effect of their Sympathy, Discord. And I fear, when they master the Sympathy and they are no longer drawn into each other’s hooves … how will they react to each other, after all that they have shared?” Celestia sighed, sagging against Discord as she felt all the stress and burdens that had been building up come rushing to the front of her mind. “How will we handle ourselves when you tire of me, Discord? How will my Ponies react when they hear that one Princess is sharing her life with the Aspect of Chaos, and the other two are entwined?”

“Let them.” Discord said softly, his tail creeping up to curl around Celestia’s hind-quarters and trap her against him. “I am Chaos, Celestia. I could be at your side a thousand years from now, I might be pulled away tomorrow. You might grow tired of me, or your Ponies may grow to love me as … it-it’s just something we’re going to have to take one step at a time.”

“That … I can handle that. You know I will not ask you to go against your nature, Discord.” Celestia murmured, enjoying the rare experience of leaning on somebody, both physically and emotionally, her own wing sneaking across Discord’s slender, serpentine form to return the hug, before she reluctantly untangled herself from Discord and rose to her hooves. “That said, I am due for a bath, then a few hours to recover myself in my quarters. I can promise cake and alcohol, Discord.”

“Cake, booze and fine company? How could I say no?” Discord chuckled, snapping a claw, and within seconds the bed was made, albeit back-to-front, and Luna’s mangas had been neatly stacked at her bedside, although in no particular order.

“I will see you then, Discord.” Celestia said, smiling as she leaned down to plant a kiss on Discord’s forehead before leaving the room with a spring in her step. Finally, something has gone right.

The bath was quick, and Celestia allowed herself a mental pat on the back, as cleaning up before a few hours with Discord in the privacy of her chambers would certainly make things more pleasant for all parties involved. Also the privacy of the baths put off all but the most outrageous petitioners, such as a hoof-ful of Nobles who had managed to dodge her staff and crashed into the Royal Baths demanding that Celestia answer their questions about the ‘incident’ in Ponyville, only for Celestia to rise from her bath, covered in suds and with her mane and tail dripping wet and clinging to her body, steam rising from her fur.

“Gentleponies, do you really want that question right now?” She had asked, giving them a very stern look that gave way to helpless laughter as all of the assembled Stallions took one look at their Princess, immediately went cross-legged and excused themselves from the Royal Baths, blushing furiously.

That’s one way to get some privacy! Celestia thought to herself as she quickly rinsed and dried off, slipped back into her shoes, torc and crown and left a message with her Maids to have the promised cake and booze sent to her rooms for ‘a long brain-storming session on how to handle the press tomorrow’.

And then Celestia teleported, wincing as she rematerialized in her room, her vision swimming and her horn pounding. A trace of wetness trickled down her face, and Celestia grimaced, knowing full well it was blood once again.

Discord appeared mere minutes later, bearing what appeared to be a number of unmarked dvd-boxes under one arm and a bouquet of white chocolate-covered roses.

It was, Celestia thought, a nice gesture, even if enough cake to feed a small army was on the way from the kitchens. Although she would admit to more than a little trepidation over movies picked by Discord.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Fluttershy, please, please you must! Tell me more, my silence you can trust!” Zecora begged, tugging on the Pegasi’s hair eagerly as Fluttershy, pink-faced, tended to the animals that lived inside her house. “A real life hermaphrodite is quite neat! Her seed for my potions would be quite the treat!”

“Z-zecora, you are not seriously suggesting … milking the poor pony?” Rarity stammered, turning mildly pink in the face in turn as she watched the Zebra badger her friend. “I’m not sure that’s wise, given that Twilight believes the pony in question could very well be … infectious, so to speak! There was a fiend involved, after all… ”

“With my hoof I would gather what I need! I would not use my treasure to capture the seed!” Zecora shot back, grinning like the cat that found the cream.

“And if your potions turn the poor Ponies who take them into hermaphrodites, or worse still, into Succuponies?”

“Doubtful it would be, for the potions to do that, but first I must know who, so the right Pony I might contact.”

“I … think you will have to wait for Twilight to finish her tests … if you don’t mind, that is.” Fluttershy interjected, putting the half-empty bag of bird-seed down and looking pitifully at Rarity. “Both Twilight and Princess Luna were adamant that we weren’t to make any form of ‘physical’ contact with Tr … with the Pony until they had made sure she was entirely benign and couldn’t corrupt other Ponies the way she had been.”

“But Fluttershy, the potions I make could make would sell for a small fortune, bits I will need to repair my home and replenish my stock!” The Zebra protested, a hint of desperation in her voice. “Please, please, won’t you two change your tune? I must have those bits or else I will be fresh out of luck!”

“Zecora, there’s really nothing we can do! Twilight’s insistent that nopony makes any form of … contact … with the hermaphrodite until she can test the pony for signs of Demonic taint, and Luna … well, let us just say that Luna is only allowing the pony to stay with them so that she may keep an eye on her, or smite her the moment she does something ‘fiendish’.” Rarity sighed and got up to give the Zebra a hug, making a squeak of protest as the exotic Shaman returned the hug with bone-crushing force. “Perhaps if you asked Twilight if you could assist her, and explained your situation, she might be willing to help you make ends meet? I mean, even Applejack has finally swallowed her pride and asked Celestia to send her the reward for all our efforts as the Bearers of the Elements, and she is the most stubborn Mare I know.”

“Some of my reagents are difficult to find, under Equestrian law a rare few might attract a fine. I have no doubt that Twilight would save my bacon, but the ingredients would give her heart-palpitations!” The Zebra sighed and let go of Rarity to go sit back on the couch and mope. “A few more days yet till my house is aired out, but the orders will not wait, and my customers are not easy to placate.”

“I’ve been … meaning to ask, Zecora. Who exactly buys your potions?” The yellow Pegasus asked softly after a short, awkward silence, the two Ponies sharing unhappy looks as the Zebra sat despondently on Fluttershy’s over-stuffed couch. “I mean, the Everfree Forest is quite scary to most Ponies … how many customers can you get?”

“Several Ponies come every month, paid by their patrons to collect my wares, and the other races come as well, all of them eager to buy their share. Diamond Dogs and Dragons and rogue Gryphons too, many come to barter for my special brews.” Zecora explained, her eyebrows rising into her mane as Rarity lifted a hoof to her mouth in shock. “So surprising is it that the other races come, to the self-same Zebra that your town once hid from?”

“No, you’re a talented alchemist and shaman, but could you explain what you mean by ‘rogue Gryphons’, Zecora?” The white Unicorn asked, looking very worried. “Specifically, what they are paying you for?”

Chapter 29

CHAPTER 29

“You know, I’m sure some Mares dream about situations where they have their homes filled with Stallions, but I know I don’t.” Twilight whispered, annoyed as she used her magic to levitate herself and the shopping over the dozing Pegasi in the upper floors of the Golden Oaks library, her ears flattened against the noise of dozens of snoring Stallions. “I just want everypony out of my home so I can get the spells I want put back into place and go hide in my bed until this all blows over, and we can go back to the usual brand of craziness.”

“Oh trust me, Twilight. You would not believe the dreams I’ve seen that involved large groups of Royal Guardsponies and the over-active minds of young Mares.” Luna giggled, her longer legs allowing her to pick her way through the ‘crowd’, Spike riding ‘shotgun’ on her back. “But in all seriousness, my sister did mention that they are likely to remain unconscious for several hours yet, even if you were to have a brass band start playing right in their ears. Our best bet is to just let them sleep off their fatigue and then send them home tomorrow morning.”

“In the morning? Wait, it’s the middle of the afternoon now, how long are they going to remain asleep?” Spike asked, nervously eyeing the snoring Guards even as he plugged his ear-holes with his claws. “There’s no way anyone is going to sleep with this racket going on!”

“Ugh, I think they’ll wake up in a few more hours, but just in case, I’ll prepare some sound-barrier spells and bind them to some pillows. The physical backlash of using back-to-back Recovery-spells over a couple of hours is one thing, but we’re going to need a lot of food for when they wake up, they are going to be absolutely starving.” The purple Alicorn stopped and turned around mid-air, outlined in the sparkling glow of her magic. “Speaking of which, are you sure it was a good idea to send Trixie out with Applejack and Rainbow Dash to get the food? I mean, Trixie might … you know, potentially be able to infect other Ponies with hermaphroditism, let alone the whole ‘latent fiend’ theory?”

“No, it was not a ‘good idea’.” Luna admitted as she picked her way down the hallway over the snoring Guards and passing the floating Twilight. “But you will need time to lay the groundwork for the library’s enchantments, and having Trixie around means she’d probably be able to see the ‘root’ spells you were using to anchor the system, which could allow her to either neutralize or take control of the entire network. I would rather risk having her out in public with the current measures in place than risk having her here, where she might potentially be able to work mischief against two Princesses.”

“Also, do not forget that collar she is wearing is tied to a powerful scrying-crystal manned by several powerful Magi within the Royal Guard. She is being monitored constantly, and the instant Trixie uses any spells, they will be alerted to exactly what she is casting, and if it violates the terms of her ‘parole’, they will ‘remind’ Trixie of her boundaries by electrifying the torc. She will instantly lose control of her body due to the muscle-spasms from the shock, and thus any spells she is casting will be undone before they are finished being cast.” The Lunar Princess explained as she finally managed to get over the last of the Guards and into the Library’s bedroom, putting her bag of ‘shopping’, half of the anti-magic-core deadbolts, onto the floor with a grateful sigh. Even levitating the cloth bag the deadbolts had been placed into had been a burden with the anti-magic cores of the deadbolts leeching away her magic. “And with Trixie firmly distracted by manual labour, we are free to turn this room into a Hermaphrodite-free zone.”

“Ha ha, yeah, just wonderful. You guys get to sleep up here where it’s safe, but I’ve got to room with Trixie in the basement. I’m just a baby Dragon, but I’ve got to sleep in the same room as your creepy stalker and her magical penis? Why can’t we just stuff her in the spare room and be done with it?” Spike muttered unhappily as he jumped off Luna’s back, claws still in his ear-holes to block out the thunderous snores of the sleeping Pegasi in the hallway.

“Because we need the spare room for Luna to ‘sleep in’.” Levitating herself into the room, Twilight gave a half-hearted shrug and dropped to the floor, landing on her hooves and dropping her share of the deadbolts to the floor. “Even if Luna will be spending most nights in here with me while we work out ways to deal with the Sympathy, the spare room becomes our … err …”

“Plausible deniability plan?” Luna offered, rolling her eyes as Twilight blushed and Spike made gagging noises in protest.

“Yes, that, our plausible deniability plan in-case somepony figures out what is going on.” The new Princess stammered, levitating a pillow off her bed and whacking Spike with it repeatedly as he hammed up his gagging routine. “Not that I’m worried, or that I don’t want Ponies to know, just … just not now. Not after today. We’re apparently evil incarnate already from stopping a Fiend from rampaging through the town, I don’t want to add ‘Surprise, we’re lesbians!’ to the list of things the rest of Equestria is going to hold against us, especially not without having the chance to explain to my family first …”

“Indeed. I begin to wonder how Celestia will react if we go to her and say we wish to continue our … our relationship after we master the Sympathy.” Luna murmured, cheeks heating up. There, I said it. Relationship. We're in a relationship. Luna thought with nervous pride to herself as both Twilight and herself turned beet red from blushing.

“Huh? You think Celestia would be against it?” Spike blurted out as the two Alicorns wrangled the anti-magic deadbolts out of their packets, the magically ‘slick’ cold-iron bolts difficult even for their potent magic to grasp.

“Not out of a belief that a union between two Mares, or two Stallions for that matter, is morally wrong, but she … Celestia has some fairly … one-sided views on a Princess’s duties. Bearing foals to continue to ‘unify’ the Three Tribes being one of the views she feels very strongly about. Even if Twilight and I went public with our relationship, Celestia would still insist that we take on Royal Consorts to keep the Unicorns, Pegasi and Earth Ponies united through the Royal Bloodlines.” The Lunar Princess explained, using her magic to manipulate a pair of screw-drivers to secure the deadbolt-mechanisms to the door and door-frame. “She would support us with all her heart … but we would still be expected to fulfil her version of our ‘duties’ as Princesses of the Realm above all else.”

“Y-you mean Celestia is expecting me to marry one of the Nobles?” Twilight gasped, pale under her fur, her wings drooping. “They’re all so …”

“Self-Centered? Snobby? Shallow?” Spike offered helpfully, and was rewarded with another pillow to the face.

“I always thought I’d fall in love, get married and live like one of those Mares in the books Celestia hides behind her treatises on Gryphon history. Not have my husband picked for me because they belonged to some fractious political-group and Celestia needed to bribe them into behaving.” The purple Princess confessed, looking and sounding like somebody had just dumped a bucket of ice-water over her. “Celestia hasn’t said anything about this! Not once!”

“No doubt she was waiting for you to find some calm in your new life before dropping this on your shoulders.” Extending a wing and drawing Twilight to her, Luna sighed as she felt Twilight’s wing reciprocate the gesture. “You can refuse, Twilight, but you of all Ponies know how hard it can be to say no to my sister when she is on a roll about Equestria.”

“What about that Flash Sentry guy? He’s kinda cool, and in the military … and he’s working under Shining Armor, so he’d be pretty much boned if he got you upset. Instant husband on a leash.” Spike said, laughing as he mimed being choked by an invisible leash.

*Whack* went another pillow as it was applied with great vigour to Spike’s head.

“NO.” Twilight thundered, glaring at Spike. “I would sooner shack up with the mangiest Diamond Dog in Equestria than so much as let that … that greaseball touch me again.”

“Hey, it was just a suggestion. If you have to end up with somebody you don’t like, at least make sure it’s somebody who can’t push you around!”

*Whack*

“I know you thought he was ‘cool’ Spike, but that Stallion is nothing like … he’s not like the Flash we met back on Earth. Their Flash was a gentleman and very ‘cool’. Our Flash is most certainly not!”

“Flash Sentry is not … likely to be on the short-list anyways, Twilight. Your list of potential Royal Consorts would be limited to Nobles of influential families, military heroes of similar calibre to your brother, or some other Pony who had the political clout to warrant tying a Princess of the Realm to them.” Luna explained, trying to remain serious as Twilight battered a complaining Spike to the floor with pillows. “War heroes, famous scholars, influential actors, anyone who might reach the hearts and minds of the common Ponies and influence them towards the ideal that Celestia has strived towards for centuries.”

“I draw the line at actors. You know most of the famous ones are part of that silly alien-cult.”

“You mean those Ponies who say Aliens created Ponies? They’re crazier than Lyra and her Human-theories … but we have met Humans, sooooo …”

“We crossed realities through an ancient mirror, and we could provide irrefutable scientific proof that Humans exist. They believe Aliens lie dormant beneath every other rock and that their quack-theory ‘programs’ can awaken the Alien spirit within all Equines. They’re crazy. And BFFs with some of the meanest lawyers in Equestria, for that matter.”

“Hey, what about when you couldn’t identify what Pinkie’s ‘Pinkie-Sense’ was? You had a few moments of ‘quack-theory’ science then!”

“Oh, I figured out that Pinkie is actually using Chaos-magic. Pinkie literally taps into Discord’s powers, through a method I still haven’t fully mapped out, to teleport and use her prescience abilities. I couldn’t quantify her abilities before because I had not had the chance to meet and study Discord and his nature until then.”

“As thrilling as this discussion is … the deadbolts?” Luna suggested as Spike disappeared beneath yet another pillow, a veritable mountain of them surrounding the much-abused Dragon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Trixie was not aware manual labour was a part of her … parole conditions.” The pale-blue Unicorn muttered as the farm-pony adjusted the bulging panniers on first Trixie, then Rainbow Dash, before hooking her fine, muscular self into the wagon …

No. BEHAVE. Trixie has finally found Mistress Twilight again, that fiend that betrayed Trixie’s trust is gone, and even if things are not … exactly as I had hoped they would be, I am still at her side. Trixie sighed and restrained her grumbling to a purely internal state.

Between her hind-legs, Trixie could feel her shaft throb in its sheath as her eyes trailed over the firm, muscular body of Applejack, and the lean, slender form of Rainbow Dash.

How many times had she furtively coupled with Mares before or after her shows, claiming her curse was a spell she had cast just for them? Easing the impossible lust that hovered forever at the corners of her mind, an insatiable need for … something. Releasing inside a Mare, or any other female helped, as did taking the rare Stallion who found her form appealing, but it was never quite enough.

Coupling with one of her own ‘kind’, such as the treacherous Sunset Shimmer, gave even greater relief, but Trixie had always felt compelled to move on, even if she did leave her ‘kindred’ lovers ways to track Trixie down if they ever fell pregnant to her seed. As much as she wanted to enjoy the pleasures that the curse gave her, she wanted her family to be free, to not have to live furtive lives trying to find mates who could accept their physical conditions, or having to take mates from within their own family to find that acceptance …

Maybe Twilight could help, using her great magic and intelligence to find a way to free Trixie from her family’s curse. How grateful the Lulamoons would be to be finally released from the curse that had gripped them for generations.

And if she couldn’t … a dark part of Trixie’s mind whispered that maybe an immortal Pony Princess might be able to keep up with her in bed. Twilight knew the ‘perfected’ spell to turn a ‘normal’ Pony into a Hermaphrodite. Would she be open to casting it upon herself?

Trixie entertained the fantasy of bearing Twilight’s foals for precious seconds before she felt the ‘Tuck’ spell begin to fray from the ‘pressure’ she was applying, and frantically re-inforced the spell, blushing as she felt the immediate response from Canterlot, half a dozen cold, analytical probes that invaded her privacy, detected her intent, and left just as quickly.

As quick, clinical and impersonal as the response was, she couldn’t help but feel violated that a dozen powerful Magi had just witnessed her try to hide a boner.

It was very … humiliating. At least nopony around her had paid any attention to the quick flash of her horn, or the way the golden torc had glimmered. But the thought that even using telekinesis, the most basic and widely-used ability of Unicorns, would draw the attention of a dozen powerful mages, many of whom Trixie had fantasized about becoming apprenticed to over her career as a magician, was frustrating, and emotionally crushing.

This is all Sunset’s fault! If Trixie had managed to come to Twilight on her own, then none of this would have happened! The blue Mare fumed, kicking viciously at a stone and sending it flying down an alleyway, and wincing as she felt her new ‘tail’ lash in anger, making her backside sway as the added weight of the new appendage pulled her center of gravity off-balance. Mistress Twilight is so close, yet now Trixie wonders if she will ever be able to show Mistress how much Trixie adores her!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sir … is this wise? The Princess is still in a foul mood.” Flash Sentry asked quietly, the Pegasi following a whole body-length behind Shining as the two Royal Guards walked down the hallway towards a small sitting-room in the ‘Royal Quarters’ of the Crystal Castle, Shining levitating a tray of Cadence’s favourite treats above his head.

“You know Flash, you’re the last Pony who should be advising anyone on how to handle an upset Mare.” Shining replied tartly, giving his subordinate the ‘evil eye’, to which the Stallion merely grinned cockily. “My sister nearly burned my ears off with the details of the disaster you called a ‘date’. The only reason I haven’t busted you down to latrine duty for the rest of your natural life is you’re a damn good soldier, and I need you to help train the Crystal Ponies how to fight, so they can raise an army to protect themselves.”

“She just needed to loosen up. And I was more than willing to loosen her up … if you know what I mean …”

“Flash … that’s Celestia’s own personal student? My LSBFF? Your commanding officer’s family-member? You are really going to have this conversation with me?”

“You feel like training all those Crystal Ponies on your own?”

“I think if I asked Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, and forwarded them some of the complaints I’ve received against you from the Crystal Pony maids, I’d get your replacement fairly quickly.” Shining shot back, taking a grim satisfaction in how quickly the arrogant smirk disappeared off of Flash’s face. “I don’t care who your cousin is, Flash, or how popular she is with the top-brass, not even her support would stop Princess Celestia from busting you down to trainee for the rest of your life if she felt the Royal Guard was tarnished by your antics. The only reason I haven't made that call is because you’re marginally more useful here than scrubbing latrines at boot-camp, and I honestly believe that under all that machismo and sleaze, there may actually be an honest-to-Faust decent Stallion.”

“Now, if you’re done pushing your luck with me, take your position with Adamant at the door while I try and convince my wife that causing a diplomatic incident won’t help convince Celestia that Chrysalis isn’t to be trusted.”

Stone-faced, Flash took his position on the other side of the doorway to the Royal Quarters, his eyes fixated on some point ahead of his, the picture of a perfectly stoic guard, and Shining sighed and opened the door, raising his special magical barrier-spell ahead of the tray moments before a pillow flew through the air, aimed squarely at the tray, or him, he wasn’t sure which.

“I’m not hungry.” Cadence said in her best ‘Court’ voice, another over-stuffed pillow floating next to her head. “I just wish to go to Canterlot, convince Princess Celestia this is madness and see that Changeling exiled from Pony lands again.”

“As much as I agree, sweet-heart, you have to admit that having Chrysalis under observation, where we might learn more about the Changelings and their physiology, is worth the risk.” Shining replied in his best ‘husband’ voice, and noting that the second pillow was most certainly aimed at his head this time, but had much less force behind it than the first, before locking the door shut behind him.

“She’s too dangerous, Shiney. The last time she was in Canterlot, she took over your will, tricked everyone into believing she was me, and would have conquered the capital if Twilight hadn’t shown up and thrown her plans out the window. How do we know that she hasn’t left some sort of command hidden in the minds of the Ponies she came into contact with? You, me, maybe even Celestia herself. Nobody knows just what a Changeling can do, and empowered with … with the love she stole from you, she was able to burn Celestia’s horn …” Cadence sighed and sagged against the arm of the couch, turning to stare out the window. “I cannot believe aunty Celestia is being so … so reckless. Chrysalis is probably laughing at us all now, probably faking her injuries with her Hive sneaking into Canterlot right now while we try to do the right thing and play diplomats.”

“I would hardly call having the entire Fourth Circle of the Magi-Corps being ferried by train to take her into custody reckless.” The white Unicorn stallion said softly, putting the tray down onto the nearby table, fiddling until he felt the locking mechanisms secure the tray to the table’s top before going to his wife’s side and nuzzling the back of her head. “Nobody likes this, sweet-heart. Not me, not you, and not even Celestia herself, I’d imagine. But you're correct in that we don’t know anything about the Changelings except what we learned when we fought them. They can change shape, they are skilled fighters and they can produce enough resin to immobilize our guards with just a few minutes, and it remains sticky and malleable by their hooves, but not by ours.”

“We have no idea how they reproduce, how they actually ‘feed’ off of love-energy, what their social customs are, how long they live or how long the average Drone can hold one shape.” Shining pointed out as his wife sagged and leaned against him. “We know that the Queen can hold a form indefinitely, but if the Changelings can only hold their new ‘forms’ for a few minutes or hours, it will help us identify infiltrators a lot easier. And Chrysalis has apparently come seeking protection from her older sisters.”

“And so we’re going to ignore everything she's done to hurt us, and help her out of a problem she probably caused herself.” Cadence muttered darkly, her feathers ruffling with her frustration.

“Not exactly, and most certainly not for free. She offered the information on her people and their homeland in exchange for sanctuary, for political asylum. If she doesn’t give up the information that we want, we just toss her back across the border and claim she was violating the terms of her surrender, and it's all perfectly legal and palatable to both our own people and our neighbours. She made a critical mistake there … and the scuttlebutt from the Capital is that Celestia has authorized the release of the rest of her regalia, after fighting some sort of fiend today in Ponyville. With the regalia to act as a focus for her powers, Celestia is going to be far, far more formidable than she was during the wedding, when she was surrounded on all sides by Ponies who could have been caught in the backwash of her power.”

“Wait, her regalia? Fiend in Ponyville? Honey, what … no no, start at the beginning, is Twilight safe?”

Three more trays of food and an hour later, Cadence stood and stared out the window as Shining finished his ‘report’ to her.

“So Sunset Shimmer found another way back to Equestria from the other world, and in doing so sidestepped the counter-measures we had put on the mirror … and has somehow become a Succuponi in the process.” The pink Princess of Love sighed, levitating the last cookie off the tray and nibbling on it thoughtfully. “You’re sure that Twilight wasn’t hurt by the Fiend?”

“No … but she is a Princess now. Aren’t you all … immortal? As in, all but unkillable except to specific items such as Death’s Scythe and other artefacts from the Age of Gods?” Shining asked, feeling a little bit worried at how often his wife was asking if Twilight being injured. This was more than just sisterly concern … it was bordering on the morbid. "I mean ... it's Twilight. She's so strong these days, and then she became an Alicorn ... shouldn't we be more worried about the collateral damage she could do, rather than the fiend?"

“We Alicorns are Immortal, but only to a certain extent. Immortals like Alicorns are all but indestructible, invulnerable to anything but objects infused with specific types of magic or rare and exotic substances, but during the first year of our new ‘life’ as an Immortal, we are ironically more vulnerable than we were as Mortals. This is a state secret darling, so please do not share it with anyone, but during the first year of their Ascension, all Alicorns, or Immortals for that matter, are very vulnerable to outside influences. While physical wounds will heal very quickly, we can still starve or suffer illnesses that might linger on and affect us when our bodies ‘stabilize’. It is entirely possible to be an immortal cripple, unable to die and unable to escape the pain.” Cadence turned and gave her husband a wan look. “Worst still, our powers are very much in flux, and any ‘pollutants’ that we are exposed to are co-opted into our bodies and made a part of whom and what we will become as Immortals. It was why Celestia kept me at her side in Canterlot almost constantly when I first Ascended and why she came down so hard on the Ponies that tried to take me away from her, or to get interviews or ‘samples’. Anything I was exposed to could have affected me, and altered my purpose. I could have become the Alicorn of Lust, or the Alicorn of Pain, or even Illness, depending upon what magical influences I was exposed to during that time. I was lucky in that Celestia and the Royal Guard were so attentive, as there was several attempts on my life during that period of time, all of them with very potent mystical weapons or exotic poisons.”

“I read the reports, but a lot of the files were classified beyond even my level, for Celestia’s eyes only.” Shining murmured, walking over to sit next to his wife and take hold of her hoof, while she in turn put a wing around his shoulders and pulled herself in close. “So that’s why you were so obsessed about Twilight being injured.”

“Yes. If the Succuponi had been able to ‘infect’ Twilight, we could have had a Demonic Alicorn on our hands. An Immortal Fiend, an Alicorn of Evil, with control over the very fundamental properties of Magic.” The Princess of Love shuddered and leaned heavily against Shining, almost pushing him over as all her weight came to rest on him. “Could you … could you do that, Shining? Seal away your own sister for all eternity and condemn the world to slowly lose its very magic, because of something done to her by somepony else? I don’t think I would be able to, and now Celestia has allowed Chrysalis, a shape-changing ‘Queen’ who is known to be hostile to our nation with magic strong enough to repress the wills of Ponies, right into the heart of the Capital right when Twilight is at her most vulnerable.”

“I just hope this doesn’t end in disaster for all of us.”

Chapter 30

CHAPTER 30

“Another six hours.” Dappled groaned and resumed banging his muzzle against the wall, vainly willing the frustration he felt to leave. "Another six hours until the reinforcements from Canterlot arrive and take over.".

Scout had been quietly taken aside by Chrysalis herself for some purpose, leaving Dappled Light and Peach Seed the task of looking after the three Changeling ‘Foals’, and while Dappled enjoyed not having to watch out for inappropriate shenanigans from the clueless 'female' Changeling, having her at the side of the infamous Queen of the Changelings filled the young Unicorn with dread that he might have done something very foolish or otherwise given the Changelings a weapon to use against the Ponies.

It was odd, however, that the Queen would leave her most vulnerable family-members in the hooves of the Ponies she had surrendered to, but Peach Seed had said it was likely a gesture of trust, given the circumstances.

And of course it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Peach Seed’s large and terrifying wife, Candy Apple, had probably chased the rest of the Hive’s Drones and Soldiers into some dark corner and was drilling them relentlessly on some of the finer points of Pony etiquette while Chrysalis had gone into hiding in a broom-closet. Dappled kept that little thought to himself to avoid a second docking of his pay.

“And … boop.” Dappled turned to look at his Commanding Officer, the mild-manned Peach Seed, catching him booping the nose of one of the little black fillies, who giggled and fell over, clutching her muzzle, while the other jumped off the coffee-table onto the pile of cushions, stubby little legs kicking madly as she rolled off the side, squealing with laughter, the white-coated colt waited impatiently for his turn to be ‘booped’.

“You’ve had a lot of practice with this sort of thing, sir?” Dappled asked tiredly, wondering how the older Stallion could possibly have enough stamina to deal with the three hyperactive young Changelings after their vigorous game of ‘hide so well two Royal Guards couldn’t find them’ that had sent Dappled and Peach into a panicked frenzy.

“Five children, and eleven grand-children, you're darn tooting I'm used to this.” Peach Seed said with obvious pride, ‘booping’ the little white Colt in turn, who giggled, ran in a tight circle and then rushed forwards to snuggle against the Stallion’s chest, joined moments later by first black Filly. “Candy and I are hoping for great-grand-children, but the grand-kids want to pursue their careers for a few more years before settling down and starting families. I can understand why, given that my Candy and I started a bit too early, but I do miss having children to take care of.”

“Faaaaaust … so many kids, that had to be a lot of work.” Dappled found the words leaving his mouth before he could think about what he was saying.

“Children are a lot of work, and perhaps the greatest, and most rewarding, responsibility anypony can ever take on, more important than a soldier’s oath to serve Princess Celestia even. Being a parent is the most profound and sacred responsibility anyone, regardless of species or creed or belief, can ever have, and not everypony is capable of owning up to that responsibility.” Peach Seed replied after a few moments of awkward silence, holding the two giggling Changeling ‘foals’ to his chest. “Children are not something a Pony should have because they think it will make a marriage stronger or save it, or because it’s their ‘duty’ to some doctrine or belief, or because ‘everyone’ has children and if you don’t have them, you’ve wasted your life. I’ve had to help too many Guards who came from families where their parents never grasped that truth, where the children were pushed to the side of their parents’ lives for the sake of a career, or social climbing, or worse still, came into this world because their parents thought they had to be parents, regardless of if they were capable of being such at the time.”

“I see …” Dappled murmured, wondering if he was about to be put through some kind of lecture. One of the advantages of his remote posting was that it kept his family’s nagging about grand-children down to a monthly letter.

“I don’t think you do, Dappled. These children are the offspring of Queen Chrysalis, the same Changeling Queen who launched an all-out assault on Canterlot and almost took the capital. The same Changeling Queen who kidnapped three fillies from a town called Ponyville to try and draw Princess Twilight into some sort of ambush.” The older Stallion continued, his voice growing hoarse with emotion. “And now that same Queen is dragging what remains of her family into Canterlot to surrender? To expose them all to hundreds of Guards who were humiliated by Changeling Drones in combat, to thousands of Ponies who were chased or imprisoned during an invasion of their home city by strange, Pony-like bug-creatures who could assume any form they wished? What kind of future will they have in Canterlot, because sure as the Sun rises, Princess Celestia cannot allow a threat like that to just walk back across the border. They’ll be trapped in a city where almost everypony hates them on sight. These three children will grow up there, surrounded by bitterness and spite, and come to believe that that kind of atmosphere is normal and acceptable.”

“….Oh.” The Unicorn Guard said quietly after a lengthy pause, the two foals snuggling up to Peach Seed apparently getting bored and rushing over to join their sibling in her game of jumping off the coffee-table and onto the pillows. “I didn’t … yeah but I can’t see Princess Celestia allowing anyone to …”

“Allow anyone to hate them? Allow anyone to discriminate against them?” Peach Seed said softly as the three foals giggled as they wiggled their way out of the pile of cushions and began to awkwardly climb back up onto the coffee table. “Nopony, not even Celestia, can be everywhere at every moment. Perhaps Chrysalis has a plan, but I wonder if she’s ever truly considered the cost that will be paid for that plan to succeed? Or who, I should say, will pay the cost.”

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“Your Highness, are you okay?”

“I am … fine, Guardspony. Just … leave it be.” Celestia sighed as she marched down the hallway to the Cell of Ultimate Confinement, with two guards in-front of her, one at her side and four more behind her, dreading the thought of seeing her former student catatonic on the ground once again.

Once, I considered you like a daughter, Sunset. You had such potential, such a fire within you that would have set Equestria marching forwards again from this rut the stale-mate between myself and the Nobles have left our country in. The Princess of the Sun thought morosely as they rounded the final corner, and the solid adamantite door became visible, the dark, stubbornly non-reflective metal grim and jarring against the polished white-granite walls of the rest of the area.

“Majesty!” The Guards at their posts saluted, but otherwise did not move as Celestia approached.

“Thank you, Guards. Has there been any change in Sunset’s condition?”

“Once the Magi were able to use disintegration spells to remove the bulk of the substance trapping her limbs, the prisoner was levitated onto the bed and hasn’t done anything else but lay there and mumble to herself.” The door-guard on the left said, looking to his cohort for confirmation.

“All we’ve been able to make out is that she desperately wants to see Twilight again, your Majesty. And she harbours an intense hatred of Luna.” The door-guard on the right added.

Oh, that’s just terrific, considering how entangled Luna and Twilight are right now.

“I see. Have the enchantments on the door been holding up against her abilities?” Celestia asked after a lengthy pause to digest the news of Sunset’s continued obsession with Twilight. “The Magi said that the counter-magic charms would work against her Charm-gaze …”

“Your majesty, we aren’t certain, the prisoner hasn’t even looked at the door since she regained consciousness. She just lies on her bed, staring at the wall and mumbling.” The right door-guard answered, looking a little pale. “Your highness … what is she? There are rumours that she is a fiend, or a new Princess. What actions should we take if she starts to hurt herself in the Cell? The Magi refused to answer our questions, and Commander Rosebush is busy with the legal department right now.”

“Sunset Shimmer has corrupted herself into a Succuponi, a literal Mortal Fiend, and I am personally ordering you that, in the event that Sunset attempts to injure herself, you are to remain at your post and merely call for myself or the Circle of Magi. She was almost strong enough to escape the binding spell I used, and her regenerative abilities are the strongest I have ever seen in one of her kind, thus it is highly unlike she will be able to physically injure herself to any lasting effect, and the warding circles built into the Cell of Ultimate Confinement should ensure her magic is turned back upon itself the moment she attempts even the simplest spell, be it to escape or harm herself.” The Solar Princess said, spreading her wings slightly to make herself look more imposing, to ‘hammer home’ her point. “As a Succuponi, her gaze is mesmerizing and has the potential to subvert your will. You are not to have any physical contact with her, even at the cost of her suffering. Anything she asks for will be relayed to the Circle of Magi, or to myself if they are unavailable. Nothing is to be given to her without either the explicit approval of either myself or the Circle of Magi, is that clear?”

“Your highness!” The two door-guards saluted earnestly. “We understand and obey!”

“Excellent. Now, stand at the ready, I wish to speak to Sunset, and I have no idea how she will react. She blames me for her banishment to Earth, after all.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sunset.”

It was all wrong. That stupid mare, Trixie, had gotten tangled up in Sunset’s plans to woo Twilight, Twilight had become confused by all the chaos and hadn’t recognised Sunset as a fellow Alicorn and had rejected her in that confusion, that horrible dusky blue-black Alicorn had put the moves on her Twilight, then Celestia had … Celestia had …

“Sunset. Can you hear me?”

Celestia had called down the power of the Sun. And it had hurt, unlike the last time Sunset had been bathed in that power, when it had felt like being bathed in warmth and light and … hope. The sensation of being engulfed in Celestia’s solar magic had felt disturbingly similar to the pain from when her muzzle had been burned on the magical shield in the basement of the library, but a hundred times worse. The pain had gone past the mere physical sensation of her skin and flesh being seared away, and had become more akin to a continuous stream of spears of molten rejection stabbing into her body and burning … something inside her. Something she hadn't felt before.

“Sunset. Sunset! Guards, are you certain Sunset has not harmed herself?”

“No, your Majesty! She simply … does not respond, not to anything or anyone. The prisoner simply lays there and mumbles to herself, like we said before.”

Prisoner? I am a prisoner? Twilight’s tentacles … I was trapped … I remember … a train? Celestia … crying?

Sunset lifted her head and blearily looked around her surroundings, feeling a growing sense of dread at the seamless white stone walls, the functional cot and toilet, and the single opening, a solid door of bleak adamantite with a grill near her head-height, where Celestia’s flowing, tri-coloured mane rippled.

A cell? Celestia put me in a cell? Sunset blinked a few times, trying to think of where she could be. Surely there was no way that Celestia would have …

“She’s moving, call for the Royal Physician, one of the Second-Circle Magi under Bleak Mountain’s command and tell Vault Guardian Shale that I want the Urn of Urudin’s Ashes, and I want it in a hurry.”

“Majesty!” Came the shouted response, and the clatter of hooves on stone floors.

The Castle? I can break out of these cells with ease! I am a Princess, and Celestia is a fool if she thinks mere stone and metal can hold me!

“The rest of you, I want you on standby in-case Sunset … no! Sunset, you must not …!”

Twilight. I want to see Twilight again! Sunset thought, feeling a surge of joy fill her as she imagined meeting Twilight again, explaining the situation and taking her away from Equestria, someplace where they could be together, learn to love one ano-

As the teleportation spell spiralled out from Sunset’s gilded horn, swirling over her body, the eddies of golden-and-red magic rippled, then swayed, then turned back upon themselves, flowing back up the ‘Princess’s’ neck and shoulders and forcing themselves back inside the tip of her horn.

The effect was devastating. Sunset shrieked, falling off the cot and suffered a seizure on the ground, bat-wings thrashing, tail and legs lashing out in pain as gilded, cloven hooves drew sparks from the magically hardened stone floor.

“Sunset! SUNSET! Guards, release me this …!”

“Your Majesty, you cannot! She is a Succuponi, she could corrupt …”

“… Still my responsibility! I trained …”

“… Reckless and …”

“ … Needs help ... “

And then Sunset knew only darkness, and an overwhelming despair at being alone, and so far away from her heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Sparkle house was large, after all it had been a gift to Night Light and Twilight Velvet from a great-uncle on Velvet’s side of the family who had given his blessings to their union, and left them his home in his will.

Several bedrooms, five libraries, three bathrooms and a truly massive kitchen, most of which had been kept locked up, more to do with keeping a hopelessly inquisitive little purple Filly out of trouble than any lack of use for the rooms, especially given how Velvet had commandeered several rooms for life-sized ‘modelling rooms’ for her writing career, but now …

Night Light sighed and tried to ignore the many glares boring their way through the back of his skull from the lounge-room where the wives and partners of their little get-together had ensconced themselves, as the regulars at the Bronze Leaf sat at the kitchen table, smoking and playing poker while their wives and partners ‘discussed’ the new living arrangements.

If Bluebone’s assassins don’t kill me, the amount of angry estrogen in the next room will. The aging Stallion through morosely, taking a sip of his cider as he considered the cards in his hoof.

Spud and his three wives in the old research room, where there’ll be enough room for them all. We’ve got the single Stallions all together in the 2nd floor library, we’ve got Bronze Gong and his partner in the spare room next to that, and Star Streaks and his partner in the northern spare room on the 1st floor … The aging Unicorn tallied up the head-count and came to the unhappy head-count of seven Stallions and fifteen Mares in an old ‘manor’ house only built to accommodate perhaps twelve Ponies at once.

“We’re going to face Tartarus itself in the morning.” Night Light muttered, earning a confused look from Spud.

“Oi, what do y’mean?”

“Think, Spud. All those Mares, lined up for the three bathrooms. Three old, cramped bathrooms, first thing in the morning, at our age? It’ll be at least two hours before they’re all done with that kind of bottle-neck, let alone having all us Stallions hanging around trying to get our share of time under the hot water.”

“Oh …. Ooooooooh, tha’s not good. Me princesses do love their morning pamperin’, they’ll be right surly if they’re made to hurry up.”

“My wife always takes at least forty-five minutes to get ready…” Another Stallion muttered, looking from his hand of cards to the pile of chips on the table, then back again and wincing. “You got a lemon tree out back, Light? I think it’s going to get a lot of watering …”

“Faust … I suppose we could set up a latrine and a shower-block in the yard, but Velvet will give me hell about digging up the gardens …” Night Light groaned, dropping his muzzle down into his hand of cards and closing his eyes as he imagined the long, pointed ‘discussions’ awaiting him. “I can only hope Thunderwing has had better luck on her mission … she runs the Thestral colony, she’s got to have a better idea about how to deal with this kind of life-style than I do!”

“Celestia did give us permission to do ‘anything short of treason or murder’, you know, to keep ourselves and our families safe until Bluebone’s trial was over.” Star Streaks pointed out, pushing a small stack of chips towards the pile in the middle. “10 more bits for me chaps, I’m feeling good about this hand.”

“Bit too rich for me, I’m out.” Bronze Gong sighed, dropping his cards onto the table. “You know, I still say we should have commandeered one of the abandoned warehouses next to the Bronze Leaf and hunkered down there. At least there’d be enough space for everyone to have some privacy that way.”

“Not the best good idea, those warehouses are all but abandoned fer a reason. Damn termites came through a few years back an’ ate their way through most of the supports. Damn foal’s fart would knock half of them down.” Spud muttered, pushing a stack of his own chips towards the pile, earning a groan of protest from the Stallions still in the game. “Night Light’s house has plenty of space between it an’ the surrounding houses so there’s no-where for a sneak to hide, a high wall brick wall to keep most Ponies out an’ sturdy doors and windows. Once we get the Unicorns to work an’ get this place charmed up ‘gainst scryin’ an’ teleports, it’ll be a nice safe lil’ bunker to hole up in.”

“Ugh, I know, but all of us crammed in here is gonna fray everyone’s nerves real quick.” Bronze Gong muttered as the remaining Stallions all considered their cards and the pile of chips in-between them all. “I just want to take the fight to the Shadow Council now, knock them on the head, put them in Horseshoe Bay and just get back to my normal routine.”

“Speak of which …” Night Light said, leaning in close and giving each of his friends a nod. “I’ve a plan to do just that, if Celestia and Rosebush start dragging their hooves. Tonight, after the wives are asleep, I want you all to meet me in the den, and we can discuss how to proceed.”

“Damn straight!” “Sounds good to me.” “About hoofin’ time, Night. Thought you’d gone soft on us!”

All I need now is Thunderwing to come back from her ‘mission’ with some good news. And then somehow try to get her and my wife to stop walking on egg-shells around each other …

Chapter 31

CHAPTER 31

“Okay, so that’s … spare sheets, enough ingredients to make fifty servings of Spike’s special pumpkin-and-butternut soup, twelve sets of industrial-grade ear-muffs … did we need anything else?” Twilight asked loudly as her friends and one Showmare all clustered tightly around the kitchen table again, leaning in close to be heard over the racket from the snoring Stallions upstairs.

“Y’all sure you don’t wanna spend the night at my house?” Applejack replied, holding her hooves over her ears and grimacing. “Lan’s sake, that’s louder than that durn DJ’s bass-cannon! How’re you gonna sleep with that racket goin’ on?”

“Sound-proofing spells and the ear-muffs!” Luna said loudly, helping Spike unpack the shopping that Trixie had carried home. “Twilight managed to get her privacy spell-network up and running again, her bedroom is almost completely sound-proofed now. And, uh, warded against unwanted intrusions.”

“Your house is carpeted in Stallions. Care to share your secrets, darling?” Rarity tittered, earning sour looks from Twilight, Trixie and Spike and snickering from Applejack and Rainbow Dash. “Besides, we may have to relocate to somewhere less … noisy. I have news that I think you and Princess Luna will want to pass on to Princess Celestia sooner rather than later, and Zecora has a … unusual proposal for you and Trixie.”

“Unusual how? I’ve had my fill of unusual today. I think we’ve all filled our quotas today for ‘unusual’, actually.” Twilight hollered back, looking concerned.

“Unusual as in … uhm …” Rarity began, tittering still before her eyes strayed to Spike, and she turned slightly green. “Ah, yes, unusual as in not-for-foals and possible crude in nature, but it may help with your, ahem, ‘tests’ to what has afflicted Trixie with that new tail.”

“I’m not certain that Zecora’s alchemy can undo a partial transformation of fiendish origins, but she’s proven me wrong several times now.” Twilight sighed and glared at the stairs, where the thunderous snoring of the Guards was forcing the Mares to nearly shout to make themselves heard. “Alright, once we get Spike’s soup cooking and ready for the Guards when they wake up tomorrow morning, we’ll come over to the boutique and discuss …”

“Actually, Twilight, it would be best if you went directly to Fluttershy’s cottage. I’d … prefer to not be involved any further than I already am …”

“…Oh. So it’s ...”

“…Socially damning if anypony hears about what Zecora is suggesting, yes.”

“Uh, hey, hello, we’re right here?” Rainbow shouted, waving a wing between Rarity and Twilight as they engaged in some sort of secret-handshake-unicorn-telepathy staring-contest. “What’s so bad about Zecora’s plan?”

“I’ll not say in-front of Spike’s tender ears.” Rarity huffed, glaring at the rainbow-maned Pegasus.

“Speakin’ of ‘right here’, where the hay is Fluttershy? Ain’t she supposed to be wit’ you an’ Zecora?” Applejack grabbed Rainbow Dash and pushed her back into her seat before the hot-tempered Pegasus could get into another fight with the white Unicorn. “Did she get scared by all the snorin’ goin’ on upstairs, or she hidin’ from Luna an’ Trixie?”

“Not … exactly. Fluttershy is helping Zecora send a message to Canterlot. Apparently our Zebra friend has been making potions for a lot of creatures other than Ponies, including Gryphons, and when we discussed the border issues, and how the Gryphons have been using alchemical bombs … let’s just say I am glad Fluttershy is not looking after any parrots, because Zecora starts to swear, she raps instead of rhymes, and I would not want any delicate ears hearing what she had to sing, err, say!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“A Zebra shaman? That makes sense, the Zebras have been using alchemy to make explosives for mining purposes for generations now …” Rosebush sighed and looked over the telegram one more time. It wasn’t often that Celestia’s agents would break protocol and deliver a report directly to the Captain of the Royal Guard, rather than their designated ‘handlers’, but given the situation …

Thank Faust my predecessors saw fit to hide Royal Agents in the national postal service to intercept sensitive messages like this. I shudder to think what might have happened if the gossip magazines, or worst still, the Shadow Court, had gotten hold of this information before we did!

How … aggravating that the Element of Kindness would send such damaging information openly, through the public telegraph network no less! If the Agent manning Ponyville’s small Post Office, where the devices were kept, had not intercepted the nature of the message and cut the line before the full message could be sent, and then recorded the message when the Element had been asked to repeat it after being told that there had been an ‘accident’ with the device.

Once the information had been secured, the Agent had assured The Bearer of Kindness that the message had been delivered, omitting that it had instead gone to Rosebush herself via a private ‘line’ that went directly to the Royal Guard’s own network, rather than the front desk of the Royal Guard reporting station.

The news that a Zebra had unwittingly been providing the Gryphons with the cores of their devastating alchemical bombs for months now could have sent the gossip-hungry Ponies of Canterlot into a veritable fit of rage towards the Zebras and soured relations just as Canterlot needed her neighbours calm and friendly.

Fluttershy’s file did state she was a little … strange … when it comes to such things. Apparently one of the greatest weapons we have in our armoury prefers to spend more time using her gift to talk to her animals and tending to herb-gardens than dealing with the real world. Looks like we’ll have to assign one of Celestia’s better Agents to oversee her, if only to prevent another near-disaster like this from happening again!

“Sir? Princess Celestia wishes to know if the PR Department has given you any indication on when her speech will be ready for her to go over? And she’s also asked to have all Royal Agents placed on amber alert, with an emphasis on looking for fiendish activity and planar disturbances in their sectors.” A harried-looking Mare popped her head in through the door, balancing several folders on one hoof and a half-eaten bagel hanging out of her mouth.

“Faust give me strength … no, tell her Royal Large Mc’Hugeness that the PR Dimwits are still arguing over how to respond to this Succuponi disaster, and that I have already raised the national alert-level of our agents to amber, but I’ll refine the orders to focus on fiendish and other outer-plane phenomena as per her instructions.” Rosebush groaned and rubbed at her muzzle with a hoof in frustration. “And will somebody get me an update on what Royal Consort Shining Armor and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza are planning to do about our Changeling ‘Ambassador’? And what's the status on Queen Chrysalis anyways? Give me some information, dammit, we’re wide open here with our asses chapping in the breeze!”

“Duly noted, sir. I’ll find our Handler for the Northern Reaches and get her to update you on what’s happening with the Crystal Empire and the Changelings. And what do you want Legal to do about the Bluebone case?” The haggard-looking Mare replied tiredly, unflappable in the face of Rosebush’s temper. “Some of the senior lawyers are a bit nervous about our lack of leads on this mysterious ‘middleman’ in the case, the Pony we can’t find. They’re saying it might become a huge breech in our case against Duke Bluebone and the Shadow Court.”

“Tell Legal I want them to stop worrying about things we can’t change and get this case moving already! I want them to pull every possible string, grab every Pony on their payroll that won’t have a conflict of interest with the case and get them working double-time! Every angle and opening we can use is to be exploited to the full extent of the law while my agents try to track down this ‘Mystery Pony’! The only way that bigoted old monster is getting out of this mess he’s dropped himself into is the plea-bargain with us, or he goes to Horseshoe Bay and takes his chances with his own allies’ assassins, no if’s, ands or buts, got it?” Rosebush snapped, her wings quivering with her frustrations. If it’s not one thing, it’s another! Why in the Pits of Tartarus are all these disasters happening right bucking now?

“Clear as a Crystal Pony’s mane, sir.” The Mare gave a quick bob of her head and withdrew, leaving the Pegasus Captain to fume at her desk.

Reports from the border we share with Gryphonia tell me that there’s still agents of the various Member-Nations of the Gryphon homeland running around and trying to sabotage our mining operations and garrisons, but there’s a clear sign that they’ve lost overall direction with the destruction of their base by Princess Celestia’s Solar Flare. They appear to be pursuing the agendas of their individual States, rather than the commands of their National Parliment, which gives us breathing room as they trip up over each other and start to fight for resources and dominance amongst themselves. Rosebush thought tiredly to herself as she finished off her fifth cup of coffee, going back over Fluttershy’s ill-timed message and putting the piece given to her into the larger puzzle, not liking the bigger picture it revealed to her. So if this Zebra shaman was making explosive capsules, believing they would be used for mining purposes, then that explains how the Gryphon agents were able to assemble such powerful explosives without field-labs. They just needed the capsules, a few pounds of commonly available chemicals and … boom. Instant bunker-busting bombs.

So if the Zebra stops making the capsules, that’ll force the Gryphons to start making their own … and that in turn will expose their supply lines even more, since alchemical explosives might pack more bang for the buck, but they require a lot more refining and some exotic reagents to work effectively. But unless Celestia incinerated them all, there are still plenty of high-explosive alchemical bombs floating around our border, just waiting to maim our people, civilian or otherwise. Despite the severity of the situation, Rosebush couldn’t help but smile at the thought of the ever-fractious Gryphons fighting each other to the death over the devastating weapons. Of course, this now means we’ll have to somehow put the Zebra Shaman under protection as well … meaning she’ll have to stay in Ponyville, rather than the Everfree Forest.

Good luck with bad luck. Opportunity springing forth from the jaws of disaster with crippling failure lurking in the wings. Just another day as the Commander of the Royal Guard. It was all Rosebush could do not to start laughing bitterly at the irony that the Bearer of Kindness’s naiveté had almost ruined her plans before revealing to the Captain of the Royal Guard a deadly plot by her enemies.

“Ma’am? Commander Thunderwing of the Night Guard is here.” The harried-looking Mare said, sticking her head through the door and startling the distracted Captain so much she almost fell out of her chair. “Ma’am? Are you alright?”

“Yes … yes, just trying to balance a dozen different disasters right now.” Rosebush replied, pulling herself firmly onto her seat and running a hoof through her mane. Just what I need, a social visit from Thunderwing right when the mother of all loads is hitting the fan! “Please, send her in immediately … and hold all calls until she leaves unless it’s a direct call from the Princesses, or Legal has finally pulled their heads out of their plots and given me a plan of attack.”

“Understood. Commander Thunderwing? Captain Rosebush is free to see you now, please go in.”

“Rosebush. Glad to see you’re just as busy as ever.” Thunderwing said, a smile on her face as the scarred, middle-aged Bat-Pony walked into the office and closer the door behind her with a wing, before seating herself on the other side of the desk without so much as a by-your-leave. “I’ll make this quick, since you’re apparently under the pump here, and technically, I was never here and I never asked for the items on this list. We need them as soon as possible, and they have to be discretely delivered to the residence of Princess Twilight’s parents without anypony outside of you, me or the Guards you assign to this task knowing about it.”

“And hello to you too, Commander Thunderwing.” Rosebush snarked, her feathered wings taking the note from Thunderlane’s fur-covered ones and bringing it up to her face, where she scanned the list, a growing sense of shocked amusement warring with her irritation at the unwelcome visit. “Do I even want to … where, by Celestia’s left buttock, am I going to find three crates worth of paralytic darts … you want a Type VI barrier crystal, in a class twelve booster cradle with a built-in long-life mana-battery no less? And … you’re not serious about the stun-wands, are you? Celestia would have my hide if they left the armory without her clearance. Flames of Tartarus, we’re not supposed to even admit we could have access to half of this equipment, let alone actually physically possess them!”

“Ah, but you see, Princess Celestia has charged Night Light, Red Norland and myself with protecting ourselves and the other witnesses to Bluebone’s attempted kidnapping of Night Light until such time as the Trial is finished. We’re permitted to use any methods we see fit up to but not including murder, treason or leaving the country to fulfil those objectives, by order of Princess Celestia herself.” The older Mare grinned, revealing sharp incisors more at home on a carnivore than a Pony. “Night Light pulled up the plans for his house, where we’ll all be staying, and we identified some weaknesses, thus we’ll be shoring up the building with some booby-traps and defensive barriers until you can get that wretch of a Unicorn into Horseshoe Bay prison and out of our manes.”

“… You know, I should ask how turning a civilian’s house in the middle of Canterlot’s suburban district into a fortified bunker with some of the most potent non-lethal weaponry in our arsenal counts as ‘defensive actions’, but I want to be able to honestly tell the tribunal I knew nothing about this when the manure hits the fan.” Rosebush sighed dramatically, earning a throaty chuckle from her counterpart. “Very well, I’ll rubber-stamp this and let the Guards protecting the armoury know this is to be very hush-hush, but I can’t spare the Ponies to get this delivered, Thunderwing, you’ll have to figure out a way to move it on your own.”

“Not even a pair of guards? Are you that worried about political fall-out?” The Bat-Pony asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

“I can’t afford to spare even one of the book-keeping staff or the coffee-gophers for this. We’re stretched to the limits keeping even basic security protocols running right now, everypony who is fit for duty is running double-shifts, what with a Succuponi in the basement, Queen Chrysalis surrendering, General Rhinestone going overboard and sending the entire Fourth Circle of Magi out to secure the Changelings for their transport to Canterlot…” The pale-tan Pegasus shrugged and then slumped down onto her desk, feeling the stress of the situation weighing heavily on her. “General Dart and General Breach pulled most of the Second and Third Circle-Magi to the border we share with the Gryphons … The First Circle and what remains of the Second and Third can barely keep our defences running at an acceptable level. Every Unicorn, regardless of position, rank or station who can do more than use the telekinesis spell is being tapped to help the remaining Magi handle their duties, and that’s creating a security nightmare all on its own since now hundreds of Ponies are seeing the inner workings of some of our most highly classified security protocols and defences. If somebody sent a half-way adequate assassin in right now after Celestia’s head, I’m not sure we could detect them, let alone stop them, before they got to our Princess.”

“And you didn’t think to countermand those orders?” Thunderwing asked softly, her grin turning into a soft frown. “Honestly, I know you’re the new kid on the block, but your position is equal to theirs …”

“Damn it all, Thunderwing, I didn’t have much of a choice! If we let Chrysalis into the country without a proper escort of guards to keep her under control, the Changeling’s Queen could disappear into the populace and we might spend decades trying to dig her up again, assuming that this ‘illness’ of hers isn’t some sort of feint to begin with to get close enough to Princess Celestia to try to kill her a second time. And Princess Celestia vetoed my protests against the rest of the Magi getting shipped out to the Gryphonia border because she feels the Magi I sent out after Chrysalis will come back safe and sound by tomorrow mid-day and it will be just a temporary vulnerability.” Rosebush snapped back, pounding a hoof onto her desk. “And now you’re off to play bodyguard to Night Light! You, the Commander of the Night Guard, a veteran General with decades of service, is off to be a bodyguard to a retired sniper, one who earned a Bronze Leaf and, if my files are accurate, is still considered part of the standard to which our rangers are to conduct themselves? By the breath of the Windigoes, if I had my way I’d be conscripting him and the rest of the discharged veterans to help shore up our border with the Gryphons, some Ponies with blood on their hooves would be a Faust-send for morale and training right now!”

Getting up onto her hooves, Rosebush stalked around her table and the other Commander, who had started to give her a worried look. “But the Princess insisted most vehemently that you were needed to protect them when I need your help more than ever to keep Princess Celestia safe, what with her playing the motherly, approachable monarch, right when the best magical defences I have to keep her safe from harm are scattered all over the bloody country? Dammit Thunderwing, you know the Royal Guards division attached to protecting Celestia has always struggled to get funding from the Court unless Celestia directly intervenes, which she never does these days, and we have to screen potential candidates to ensure their loyalty is to Celestia herself, not some Noble House or political faction, which cuts down on the number of suitable troops under my command. We’re under-budget, severely lacking in Pony-power and I need the Night Guard here, under your control and acting in accord with my troops to ensure we can keep Celestia safe at all costs!”

“I left Major Nightshade in temporary command until I get back … Rosebush, this isn’t …”

“Oh yes, Nightshade, the cherry on-top of this manure-pie everypony has left on my plate! Nightshade, more famous for how many Ponies she can fit into her bed than her military career. Nightshade, who abandons every foal she gets because she won’t use protection because it ‘doesn’t feel as good with a rubber’ or take the pill because it makes her feel bloated during estrus.” The Pegasus snapped furiously as she seated herself again, glaring at Thunderwing and wishing her damn headache would go away. “You left the Pony with the least amount of self-discipline and control I’ve ever seen in command of the largest fighting force left in Canterlot, right when everything is going straight to Tartarus in a handbasket, and you wonder why I’m just about ready to explode?”

Thunderwing blinked, looked at her hooves, at the sheet of paper still clutched in Rosebush’s feathers and then down at her hooves again.

“You are not the only one who has been forced into a corner by Princess Celestia’s commands.” She said in a quiet, brittle voice. “If I had any say in the matter, I wouldn’t be doing this. You have no idea how much it hurts to be this close to Night Light and Twilight Velvet again, to know that … it doesn’t matter.”

An awkward silence between the two Commanders grew, before Rosebush sighed and put her face to the desk, giving up.

“Sorry, Thunderwing, I'm just ... we've got our plots against the wall here and Celestia is over-riding every order I give because she's trying to keep up the pretense that everything is under control. As if it ever is. I’m aware you have a … personal history with the Twilight House, I shouldn’t be taking this out on you.” The Pegasus muttered, looking at the older Mare, whose expression was one of abject misery. “Can’t you appeal to Celestia, ask her to send somepony else? A conflict of interest maybe, say that you’ll be unable to operate at one-hundred percent efficiency because of your past interactions with them?”

“She shot that excuse down as soon as I suggested it.” Thunderwing replied in a soft voice. “Her response was, and I quote, ‘You are one of my Commanders, a General in my army. If you cannot separate your work and your private life, then perhaps you might consider stepping down from the military.’. So I either stick it out with my exes, or Celestia threatened to revoke my position.”

“Buck me sideways…” The Pegasus swore softly, reaching into the lowest drawer of her desk and pulling out a crystal decanter of brandy and two large, shallow glasses. “That’s brutal, especially coming from our Princess, miss Large McHugeness, whose ass the sun really does shine out of.”

Thunderwing couldn’t help but snort with laughter at that, taking a shot-glass of brandy from the Captain of the Royal Guard, sniffing it and then taking a sip.

“Perhaps … or perhaps there is something else going on that is making our Princess less … Princess-y than she was before.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Captain Glimmer fought hard to not roll her eyes at Brass Stars’s visible impatience as gung-ho Stallion stomped back and forth from the edge of the concrete platform back to the station-master’s booth, the dull-orange Pegasi’s large wings trembling with frustration.

Seriously, how on Equis did he pass basic training? I’ve met Diamond Dogs with more restraint!

“Sir, if I may be so bold, the train is still a few minutes out, perhaps you would like to go over the plan one more time before the Magi from Canterlot arrive?” She offered helpfully, wincing as the glare she received from her C.O. bored through her and into the solid concrete wall behind her.

“You may not be so bold, and you will hold your tongue, Private! I am very unhappy with being side-stepped like this and when I find who broke the chain of command, I am going to personally stomp their nards in so hard their grand-parents will feel it.”

“It’s Captain, sir, and I’m fairly certain you can’t do that under Equestrian law.”

“That depends, Private, on who went out of their way to deny me a chance to get back to Canterlot, and just how much trouble they think they can cause with my … connections … back in the Court.”

In other words, you’re going to lean on your cousin’s influence to avoid punishment if you get caught. Again. Glimmer thought bitterly, noting how the Pegasus was leering at her, no doubt fantasizing about seeing her demoted and demoralized. At least she hoped that was the extent of his current fantasy involving her. Rumors about Brass Star's 'conquests' at the local bar did nothing to inspire confidence in her commanding officer's nature.

Thankfully, the train arrived sooner than anticipated, the locomotive all but glowing with heat to the point that both Major and Private had to back up to avoid getting burned by the radiating heat. As soon as the train came to a halt, however, the doors on the carriages opened and Unicorns came swarming out. Dozens of them actually, all bearing the deep purple robes of the Royal Guard’s Magi-division.

Are those gold bands on their horns … Holy Faust on Toast, Command sent so many of Bleak Mountain’s Magi … wait, four golden bands … Celestia’s Beard, did Canterlot Command send the entire Fourth Circle of Magi to capture Chrysalis? Twilight Glimmer thought in awe as the stream of stern-faced Unicorns trotting out of the carriages failed to stop or slow down.

An whopping fifty Unicorns, grim and imposing in their royal-purple robes and the glittering, enchanted gold bands on their horns, surrounded the Major and the Captain, focusing their gaze on Brass Stars, who for all his bluster and fury, had gone remarkably docile in their presence.

Obviously he was only expecting a few Magi, not two Platoon’s worth of the highest order of Mages in the country … Twilight Glimmer thought with vicious glee as she struggled not to burst into laughter at the situation.

“On behalf of my Garrison, thank you for comi-.” Brass Stars began, bowing low, before one of the older-looking Unicorns, whose body-fur had turned silvery grey and mane had turned pure white, stomped a hoof and spoke.

“There is no time for pleasantries. Have your troops ready to move within five minutes.” The aging Magi barked, a flicker of irritation marring his face. “We will capture the Changeling Queen and her Hive, and prepare her for transport to Canterlot. Your troops are to stand by and provide support if she does not come quietly, and only if we give you leave to do so.”

Mouth agape for precious seconds, Brass Star’s orange fur barely hid the furious red that rushed from his muzzle to the base of his neck, and nothing could disguise the way his wings ruffled or his mane stood on end, but the Magi had already moved away, moving into a formation of a large, three-ringed circle, all facing inside, arcs of magic snapping between their horns, and a few others who were levitating what appeared to be segments of a wagon of some kind out of the final carriage of the train.

Brass Stars and Twilight Glimmer had been dismissed, it seems.

“TROOPS! PREPARE TO MOVE OUT!” Brass Stars bellowed, fury and humiliation evident on his face as he turned his ire onto his troops, his rage only growing as he saw his troops already assembled into formation, Glimmer having given the order minutes ago before coming back to try and talk to her C.O.

In short order, there were eighty Guards and fifty Magi gathered and on the move, trotting at a comfortable pace as they headed towards the outpost on the border where the Changeling Queen and her Hive had been taken, eight of the sturdiest Guards assigned to pull the wagon, simply made with royal-purple silk cloth for walls and a roof, stretched over a wooden frame, which the Magi had said was enchanted to the hardness of steel.

The Guards, too disciplined to speak out of turn on a mission, and the Magi, muttering incantations to themselves as they prepared for a trap by the Changelings, made for a depressingly silent journey across the dry trader’s road, the heat-cracked mud chipping and turning to powder under the hooves of the Ponies. It was, Glimmer supposed, better than the Magi trying to teleport themselves directly to the Changeling Queen or trying to commandeer transport from the handful of farms and mines that tenaciously fought to be viable at the very edge of Equestria’s borders.

When Brass Stars offered to have the few Pegasi under his command take to the air to provide reconnaissance, the same elderly Magi who had spoken to them at the train station bluntly refused the offer without hesitation, or amusingly enough given how frustrated her C.O. was getting at the lack of explanations being given, any concern for the local command structure. Brass Star's order to increase the pace was likewise countermanded immediately by the greying Unicorn.

It was, after months of enduring the gung-ho machismo-powered Stallion’s morale-crushing leadership of the Garrison’s troops, very appealing to see Brass Stars brought firmly to heel and made to sit, as it were. Whoever he was related to in Canterlot obviously did not have the pull to get the Pegasi out of trouble with the Fourth Circle of Magi, second only to their leader and teacher, Stoic Mountain.

“Sirs? If I may be so bold, it’s going to get too dark to see soon.” Twilight Glimmer said loudly as she trotted a few steps behind the graying Unicorn leader of the Magi and the fuming Brass Stars. “A quick break to let everyone get their wind back, and for the Unicorns to make some light-charms so everyone can see where they’re putting their hooves, might be a good idea.”

“Denied.” The Magi’s leader said before Brass Stars could finish opening his mouth. “We will be conserving as much of our magic as we can to keep the Changelings docile for their trip back to Canterlot. You Guards will just have to make do with what light sunset and moonlight will give us.”

Okay, decidedly less amusing now. Glimmer thought, hoping her face remained the same pleasant mask she’d cultivated during Brass Star’s tenure. Whoever this Magi was, he was most certainly the most abrupt and bitter he-mule she’d ever met. At first I thought it was the usual Canterlot Elite attitude to non-Unicorns on display here, but he's very antagonistic to everypony, even one of his own 'kind'.

“Forgive my impudence, Sir, but if the Magi alone will be using spells on the Changelings, we still have eight Unicorns amongst the Border Guards here. We can provide enough light-charms to provide minimal light for the rest of the Guards.” Glimmer offered, only to have the greying Unicorn turn and give her a glare so loaded with venom she almost missed a step.

“I doubt a Border Guard is capable of even that … what is your name, Mare?”

Oh. Oh you did not just go there.

“Twilight Glimmer, Sir. Captain of the 1st Unit, 42nd Garrison, specialising in communications and long-distance scrying spells.”

It was … gratifying … to see the Magi closest to her flinch away the moment she said ‘Twilight’. Much as the family name caused me no end of grief in Canterlot, it’s times like this our name still carries enough infamy to make the other Unicorns take notice.

“A Twilight, eh?” The greying Unicorn muttered, his glare turning into a look of quiet alarm. “Very well … Captain. You may attempt to provide light for the rest of the Border Guards then … but the instant I give you the command, you are to douse them, am I clear?”

“Perfectly, sir!” Glimmer replied, saluting as best she could while trotting, hoping her pleasant ‘mask’ expression was holding up to the scrutiny of the Ponies around her. It wouldn’t do for them to see how upset she was, especially not the fuming Brass Stars, who had barely gotten a word out of the Magi’s leader other than ‘No’ or ‘Just do it.’

This cannot possibly get any worse …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well isn’t this just perfect.” Twilight sighed, trying to not slump as Luna and herself trotted over to Fluttershy’s cottage … with about two-score Reporters following about ten feet behind them, snapping pictures with their cameras and generally making Twilight feel incredibly uncomfortable, but otherwise not trying to get the Princesses to talk to them.

“Be grateful, Twilight. At least they aren’t trying to use magic to make our tails fly up into the air.” Luna replied in a quiet voice, that vein throbbing in her temple again. “Some lout decided it would make a good ‘money shot’ to try and flip Celestia’s tail out of the way and take a shot of the Royal Rump.”

“Ugh, Luna, ‘money shot’ doesn’t mean … ugh.” Spike muttered before shoving a claw into his mouth and shaking his head.

“Wait, what?” Twilight gasped, blinking and shooting Luna a look of shock, before her gaze turned to the reported, picking out at least six Unicorns amidst the mob.

“Yes. Thankfully, both my sister’s tail and my own are beyond such things, but the Royal Guards flanking her were not so fortunate.” A ghost of a smile crossed Luna’s face as she spoke. “Needless to say, the reporter was fined for ‘sexually harassing’ the Guards and was forced to publicly apologise to the guards for her actions, but it happened.”

“Maybe I can convince Rarity to make me some weights to keep my tail hanging low …” The newest Princess muttered, her horn flickering with magic for an instant with a barrier spell on her lips, before she thought better of it, and instead turned to try and focus on the narrow path that led to Fluttershy’s cottage. “After half the reporters at the press-conference passed out or threw up after I described teleportation spells, I would have thought the reporters would be keeping their distance from me for a while.”

“Oh no, I assure you there is no force on Equestria more determined, more relentless, than the Canterlot Paparazzi. Even if they can’t find a story, they will simply make one up, and then force you to chase them through the courts to get a retraction.” The Lunar Princess explained, an expression of intense irritation crossing her face. “Faust knows some of the slanderous filth that’s been printed about myself during the first few months of my return. Celestia says that we Princesses are not to use our Right of Crown frivolously, but flogging Ponies that wilfully slander the Royal Family of Equestria is an old law that was never actually removed from legal codexes, so I don’t believe that counts as ‘abusing’ that Right.”

And just like that, the reporters found the grass, skies and trees suddenly fascinating … at least for a few moments, before following the two Princesses and the young Drake with about twenty feet between the two groups now.

“Faaaaaaauuuuuuuuuust.” Luna and Twilight groaned together, shooting each other concerned looks.

Whatever it was that Zecora had planned for Trixie, it was, according to Rarity at least, and she of all ponies would be able to pick it, a socially damning concept. And now the two Princesses had a pack of Canterlot’s finest news-weasels on their tails, guaranteed to turn even the most innocent picture into the centrepiece of a story intended to wow the population while painting the victims of their ‘reporting’ in the worst possible light for shock-effect.

And if Twilight and Luna attempted to drop barriers or shields around Fluttershy’s cottage, it would simply attract even more attention, and possibly bring hordes of reporters and paparazzi down on Fluttershy’s head, which would cause the cripplingly shy Pegasus no end of grief.

Still, new space between them and the reporters gave the two Mares a chance to hash out a rushed plan between them. They would enter the cottage, explain the plan to Fluttershy and Zecora, and then leave the cottage under an invisibility spell and take refuge back in Ponyville.

Twilight suggest teleporting, and was rewarded with a sickly look from Luna followed by an emphatic “NO.”, while Spike had asked if Luna was able to gather everyone up in her astral mane and fly away, but again the Lunar Princess had pointed out that a magically self-contained piece of the night sky would be far, far too obvious on a bright, sunny day like today.

Which, unfortunately, left them with only Twilight’s invisibility spell, which would allow them to escape under a dome of magic that would distort light and hide whatever was inside of them, but would be instantly noticed if the dome was entered by a prowling reporter or one of Fluttershy's animals.

Still, it was their best bet, and their only real plan, as the unhappy trio rounded a bend in the path and finally caught sight of Fluttershy's idyllic little cottage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh, they're here, they're almost here!" Fluttershy whispered, already in a panic as she flapped around her cottage, trying to set the coffee-table with snacks and tea while simultaneously fighting off Angel's attempts to lock the door, and urging the rest of the animals to leave the cottage for the duration of the visit.

"Fluttershy, my dear dear friend, don't you think this worrying should be at it's end?" Zecora asked, bemused, from the couch as she swiped another oat-and-honey biscuit from the pile, savouring the sweet treat on her tongue. "Twilight is your good friend, and Luna a Princess, pure now thanks to you. I am certain both would be mortified to be the source of this hullabaloo!"

"But .... but ...." The butter-yellow Pegasus whimpered, giving the Zebra shaman the biggest, most tear-filled eyes Equestria had ever seen. "What if Luna is upset with me! I was so terrified of her last Nightmare Night, what if she's holding a grudge against me! I need to make everything perfect, so I can apolo-ANGEL BUNNY! I told you to stop doing that!"

Snapping in a ray display of anger and nerves, Fluttershy snatched the eternally plotting rabbit off the door, where he had been swinging back and forth on the deadbolt chain in an attempt to get it into position and lock the door, the two engaging in a glaring contest before the rabbit remembered exactly what he was competing with and decided to turn his face away and sulk instead.

"Now I know you're only trying to protect me, Angel, but I really, really need to show Princess Luna I am a good friend, so ... out you go, with the rest of the animals." Flapping on her soft wings, Fluttershy moved at, for her, a blistering pace to the back of the cottage and gently put Angel out through the doggy-flap on her back door, and then latched it close. "Okay, quick, Zecora, can you think of anything I might have missed?"

"Your biggest hurdle was just thrown out of the room, so please stop panicking and sit down in the room. I will answer the door, so please won't you calm down, your friends are almost here, it would be sad to meet them with a frown!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Outside.

Outside.

That ... that ... that feather-headed Mare had put him, the great and terrible Angel Bunny, outside like a common animal! HIM?

And all he was trying to do was bar the door to the greatest threat to his plans for world domination! Stupid Purple Smart and Nightmane Spooky! Why now, when his first act in the grand reign of terror he would bring down upon the blind, foolish Ponies had only just begun, did they have to show up?

First, the Three Jailors had taken him away before he could claim responsibility for the attack, and now two of the threats he needed the most planning to face were right on his doorstep? Of all the ... how could this happen to me, the great and terrible ...

"Well hello there!"

Oh by the Golden Carrot, no.

“How long has it been, oh fluffy white one? Since you tricked the Buttery-one into giving me a flea bath, I mean.”

Turning to face the source of the irritating voice, Angel Bunny kept his features as neutral as possible, his movements slow and smooth as he could, to avoid triggering the predatory instincts of the voice's owner.

Opal, the fiendish cat owned by White Snooty, grinned down at Angel, her purple bow hanging off to one side, dirt smearing her normally pristine paws and a horrid grin on her face.

“Opal. Charmed.” Angel muttered, his eyes flicking across the backyard of Yellow Stare-Hard, noting that the rest of his kin had made themselves scarce, and the lesser animals were keeping their distance.

She might be one of the smallest animals, but her claws are razor sharp. Angel groaned mentally, remembering all-too-well the scars he'd earned the last time he had tangled with White Snooty's master. At this range, he might be able to slip past her and hide in the warrens his kin had built at his command, but he'd still lose fur at least from her claws, if not actually be injured.

“Of that, I have no doubt, little … morsel. Indeed, how grateful I am to be taken so far from my home by my minion, dropped into the hooves of her yellow subordinate, and now put out into the dirt like I was one of your kind … meat.” Opal replied in a soft, pleasant purr, even as her claws emerged from their sheaths, digging into the soft grass as the cat kneaded the ground. “And now, you have been dropped into my paws, and just when I was missing my cat-nip filled toys … I suppose you'll have to be a good host … and fill in for them while we wait.”

Oh FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU...

Chapter 32

CHAPTER 32

“Zecora?” Twilight asked, confused, as the door was opened and the Shaman urged them inside, slamming the door shut literally on a reporter's face as the Mare charged the door to get a shot of the inside of the cottage, the muffled grunt of pain and the crunch of an expensive camera against the hardwood door a guilty pleasure to the newest Princes.

“Greetings my friends, please take a seat, Fluttershy is waiting and these reporters miss not one beat.”

“A Zebra … truly, it has been an age since I last saw one of your people.” Luna murmured, smiling down at the Shaman as she ducked her head to avoid piercing a low-hanging bird's nest with her horn. “And yes, please excuse me as I ...” The Alicorn of the Night said softly, her horn flickering with dusky blue-black magic, the air in the cottage vibrating for several seconds before the spell faded away. “...ahem, secure the cottage. Unless there is another Unicorn close to Twilight’s level out there, scrying spells will not work for a few minutes in this home.”

On one of the over-padded chairs, Fluttershy hid behind her long pink mane, fiddling a tea-cup between her hooves as the two Alicorns and her Zebra house-guest seated themselves on the other chairs, squeaking inarticulately as Zecora poured the guests their tea.

“Now, given that we have a pack of Equestria's most invasive reporters just outside the door, and my spell will not last longer than a few minutes, I suggest we cut to the chase.” Luna said after an attempt to make small-talk fell through due to Fluttershy's crippling shyness around the Lunar Princess, the butter-coloured Pegasus literally freezing up with remembering her ordeal as a model when Luna tried to broach the awkward silence by asking how she had dealt with the paparazzi. “Twilight will be casting an invisibility spell on all of us, and each of us will grab hold of the other Pony's tail. I will then lead us back to Ponyville, and we'll figure out a safe place to meet and discuss your … mysterious plan, Zecora.”

“An invisibility spell, that sounds grand, but how will we walk without if we cannot see where we stand?” Zecora asked as she and Luna stood up, and Twilight levitated the all-but-paralyzed Fluttershy out of her chair.

“It's a dome, rather than a personal spell. When we're inside it, we'll be able to see each other and see out, but nobody will be able to see in. That said, anypony or anything that enters the dome will instantly see us, and the spell is ridiculously easy to dispel if you know what to look for.” Twilight explained, shaking the rigid Fluttershy a few times to see if she would 'unlock' from her posture of terrified shyness. “Also, our tracks will be visible, as well as any other environmental changes we make. So we'll have to stay on the grass and stay quiet, but at least we'll be able to get out of sight of the paparazzi, and then we can move faster, I hope.”

“Not much of a plan, but those ponies just won't quit. I do know of one place where we can talk, but I fear it might be a tight fit!”

“Honestly, Zecora, right now I'm open to just about any suggestion you've got.” The purple Princess sighed, charging her horn to cast the spell, which appeared slowly, making Twilight disappear an inch at a time before the dome expanded over the other Ponies. “Alright girls, let's do this. Let's just hope Applejack and Rainbow Dash can keep Trixie out of trouble until we get home.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So … we're just gonna spend the day kicking back?” Spike asked in a bemused tone as the three Mares eyed each other over their cards, a pile of bottle-tops and knick-knacks from Twilight's kitchen piled between them, the Mares sitting around a folding table in Twilight's basement to get away from the thundering snores that filled the library above them.

“Spike, Twilight said to keep an' eye on you an' Trixie till she got back from Fluttershy's place. An' tha's just what we're gonna do.” Applejack replied tartly, pushing a bottlecap into the pile in the middle of the table. “Ah'll raise you both a cap.”

“Damn, AJ, how can somepony who can't lie to save her own skin be so good at poker?” Rainbow Dash muttered angrily, looking at her cards, the smug look on Trixie's face, and the inscrutable expression on Applejack's mug. “Have you been taking lessons from Big Mac?”

“Ah ain't lost a game of poker since ah was Applebloom's age, an' ah sure ain't gonna lose to you, Rainbow Dash, an' most certainly not to miss 'ties-people-up-with-their-own-rope' over here neither!” The farm-pony muttered, a tight grin on her face as the other two Mares groaned and put their cards down on the table in defeat.

“Trixie is so very glad she has no bits to bet. Trixie believes that you would make Trixie a beggar simply to pay her back for her past foolishness.” Trixie moaned, patting a hoof on her new golden torc as her 'demonic' tail swished back and forth across the polished wooden floors.

“Seriously, we have got to get Twilight to cast that cloud-walking spell on your hooves. Next friday is a poker-night at the Wonderbolts Auxillary Stables, and we can make a small fortune fleecing the rubes.”

“Ah am not helpin' you rip-off your fellow trainees, Rainbow Dash! That jus' 'aint right, tha's just downright mean even.”

“Pfft, like Thunderlane and Cloudkicker ever do anything useful with their money! I'm doing them a favour, by giving it to a better cause! Me!”

“An' what about Bulk Biceps? You gonna take his bits? What with him havin' to take care of lil' Feathweight after spendin' all his bits getting himself an' his lil' colt out to Ponyville to get away from his Ex an' her family in Cloudsdale?

“Uuuuuugh, no, he never shows up to these kind of things anyways, he's either off playing with his kid or competing at those stupid muscle-shows. And yeah, I remember hearing about how he'd moved to an Earth Pony town so his kid wouldn't get mocked for being … well, a featherweight.”

“Give it up, Rainbow Dash. Applejack's got you smoked, and can you imagine the lecture if Twilight caught you trying to use a friend to earn bits?” Spike said loudly, glaring at the blue Pegasus over his comic. “Bad enough we're having to sit here in the basement just to be able to talk to each other without being drowned out by the Guards' snoring, but now you're begging …”

“I do not beg! That is so uncool!”

“... begging Applejack to come along on an adventure that you know is going to make Twilight start lecturing us all into the ground?”

“Twilight lectures? Does she do it in a tight mini-skirt and a white cotton blouse with half-moon glasses?” Trixie muttered, blushing, horn flickering as she reinforced her 'Tuck' spell before shuddering at the sudden intrusion of foreign magic from Canterlot.

“Ahm gonna pretend ah didn't hear that, Trixie. But Spike's got a point, sugar-cube, ya'll know how this'll end: We'll go up, rake in the bits an' then have to deal wit' Twilight preachin' at us, an' then a Friendship-Letter to the Princess 'bout what we learned ...” The farm-pony grunted and pulled the pile of her 'winnings' towards herself, then divided it into three equal piles and pushed two of them back to the other Mares. “Haven't we been through this mess enough a'ready?”

“Faust, you are so BORING. Fiiiiine … but seriously, one day we are going to Las Pegasus and you are going to make some. Big. Bucking. Bits.” Rainbow Dash muttered darkly, taking the cards and shuffling them with her wing-feathers as she sorted her 'stash' of bottle-tops and knick-knacks with her fore-hooves.

“Maybe. Now, Spike, I need you to mosey on outta here, 'cause ah've got questions fer Trixie here.” Applejack grunted, eyeing the blue-coated Unicorn sternly. “An' it's girl-questions, y'hear?”

“Uhm ...” Spike mumbled, peeking his eyes over the top of his comic again. “Twilight asked me to ...”

“An' ah'm tellin' yah to git!”

“Good enough!” Spike saluted the glowering Farm-Pony nervously, leaping to his feet and taking the steps up out of the basement two at a time.

“Now, Trixie … uhm … gawsh this is ...” Applejack's stern expression rapidly turned into a red and embarrassed mask, pulling her hat down over her eyes. “Look, Trixie, ah hate to ask this, but ah saw somethin' … odd … when Luna pulled you outta the Library earlier. A bit of black fur an' … an' stuff between your hind-legs.”

An awkward silence grew, Applejack keeping her hat over her eyes, blushing furiously, while Rainbow Dash and Trixie eyed each other and slowly turned pink.

“Uh, yeah Applejack, that's an urban legend. Mares don't have dicks, it just doesn't happen.” Rainbow Dash snorted, chortling before her laughter gave way to a painful silence as Trixie all but cringed. “No ...”

“It is … what drew Trixie to that Fiend, Sunset. Trixie could feel the attraction, the sensation of being near one of her own kind. Trixie can … feel … others of her kind, like an itch that won't go away, when we are close enough to one another.” Trixie mumbled, turning neon pink from embarrassment and shame as Applejack nodded, and Rainbow Dash's jaw almost reached the floor. “Trixie did not realise that Sunset was also a demon, or else Trixie would never have let the Fiend into her bed, or led her back to Ponyville.”

“An Twi' says you might be … infectious?” Applejack mumbled, her hat still pulled down low.

“Trixie does not believe she is, but Miss Twilight and Princess Luna are both concerned that Trixie may bear a lingering … lingering taint from when Trixie had been deceived by the Succuponi.” The show-mare replied after another awkward silence. “They believe only if Trixie were to have intercourse would any … any infection be spread to the partner, not by mere proximity.”

“Ah see. Well, thanks fer clearin' that up for me, Trixie. Wasn't quite sure 'bout how things stood.” The Farm-Mare said loudly, still blushing with her hat over her face. “Given some … uh … some of the things Twi' said was in that Scroll, ah was a lil' worried that ya'll might be turnin' Mares around yah into more a' them perm-afro-dykes jus' standin' there. Ah ain't got no idea 'bout magical Unicorn stuff like this … goes right over mah head, really.”

“Wait … just wait a minute! Are you saying that our Twi', our bookish, never-had-a-coltfriend can't-look-at-an-issue-of-Playcolt-without-bleeding-from-the-nose Twi, has a spell that gives Mares dicks ...” Rainbow Dash asked loudly, wings pointing straight up into the air and a look of stunned amazement spreading across her face, followed by a goofy grin. “That … do either of you realise just how much fun that could be? No more strap-ons that don't work right, no more expensive toys to have to maintain … that'd be awesome. And yours retracts, right Twixie?”

“It is Trixie ...” The Show-Mare retorted with a huff, crossing her legs together under the table. “A-and yes, it can be hidden with the right spe ...”

“Cool, whatever, find me that scroll then, Twerpie, and cast that voodo that you do so well on me. I can think of a few handy uses for a real, live, throbbing ...”

“Ye're a bit too wound up there, Rainbow. Cool down, alright?” Applejack pulled her hat away from her face and whacked the rainbow-maned pegasus with it. “The last thing Equestria needs is ya'll spreadin' some dickmare curse 'round cause yer tryin' to prove somethin'!”

“What, that I'm twenty percent more awesome than any other lover?”

“Rainbow, ah'm jus' sayin' tha' maybe ya'll need to go take a cold shower. An' Miss Trixie, ah'm sorry fer askin' an' makin' ya'll embarrassed, it's jus' been preyin' on mah mind.” Applejack nodded her head to Trixie even as she continued smacking a protesting Rainbow Dash with her hat. "Ah got a lil' sister, an' the thought o' her bein' cursed an' turned into a perm-afro-dyke plum got me scared."

“Ugh, fine.” Rainbow Dash grunted, stepping out of range and heading to the stairs that would take her up to the library-proper.

“An' where do y'think you're going?” Applejack shouted at her, plopping her beloved hat back on her head.

“Like you said, a cold shower.” Rainbow snapped back, flicking her tail around with a wicked grin on her face as Trixie flushed and hunched down over the table. “An' then we're looking for this scroll of Twilight's.”

For several moments neither Applejack or Trixie spoke, just staring at Rainbow Dash's rapidly disappearing back, and then the stairwell, before Applejack yelped in surprise as the bottle-caps and knick-knacks they had used in their card-game started to spill into her lap, the folding table having mysteriously raised itself off the floor at Trixie's end.

“Gah! Trixie, what happened?” Applejack spluttered, trying to push the knick-knacks back onto the folding table with little success, Trixie leaning heavily on her end of the table to try and push it back down.

“Uh … nothing, nothing at all.” Trixie replied with a panicked smile on her face, grimacing as she leaned heavily on her end of the table as if in pain. “But perhaps it is in everypony's best interests if Trixie takes the shower as soon as your Pegasus friend is done.”

Chapter 33

CHAPTER 33

It was, Rarity supposed, a good day, all in all.

Sure, the morning had been a near-disaster, what with a Succuponi trying to corrupt Twilight and a horde of Canterlot's finest reporters trying to turn the blame for the whole thing on poor Twilight, let alone being the victim of one of Applejack's infamous 'hay-maker' hoof-punches.

Still, all had turned out well, the Fiend was captured and taken to Canterlot to be imprisoned under the mountain, the reporters had been completely traumatized by Twilight’s magi-babble and Applejack had foolishly apologised for her actions by promising to look after the troublesome Cutiemark Crusaders for the evening.

Which allowed Rarity to finally spend an evening catching up on her work … and to plan some well-deserved revenge on the farm-pony for punching the fashionista square in the chin.

“Erhm, Miss Rarity, I know you're … look, I think I took your order down wrong. You want us to make a triple-layer chocolate cake, glazed cherries, fresh whipped cream, caramel sauce, all the trimmings … and you want triple the normal sugar content in addition to 'whatever will give the Ponies who eat it enough stamina to stay awake all night' … and send it to Apple Acres by this evening?” Carrot Cake asked nervously, eyeing the smug-looking Unicorn like she had grown a second head.

“Oh yes, that's the order I gave you.” Rarity replied, beaming at the gangly Baker.

“Erhm … that's … I guess we can … can make this cake. But Miss Rarity, this cake will be … will be … whoever eats this cake will be so saturated with sugar that they won't sleep for days, let alone the side-effects from so many stamina potions!”

“And that, Mr Cake, is precisely the point. The Apples are looking after the Cutiemark Crusaders tonight … I want to make sure that dear Applejack has the energy and the … stamina … to handle them.” Rarity whispered back, batting her long, elegant eye-lashes at the gangly Stallion, who gulped and shot a look at his plump wife, who was busy dealing with a gaggle of reporters all firing off their orders to her, all at once.

“Well … uhm … we could have the cake done by about …. five? It's two in the afternoon now … that's the soonest we could get it done.” Carrot Cake stammered, his eyes flicking back and forth at something only he could see, no doubt imagining making the cake right now.

“Fan-tastic! That will be just fine, Mr Cake. Please start as soon possible, and put it on my tab! Ciao!” Rarity batted her eyes at the gangly stallion once again and all but pranced out of the shop.

With Sweetie Belle occupied, Applejack getting her just deserts in a very literal sense and Opal over at Fluttershy's cottage, I can finally … the Fashionista stopped and stared at her face, reflected in the glass window of a shop, and scowled as she noticed the swelling on her chin. Oh blast it all … no. No, I will not let this get to me. Time to be pampered, to be relaxed so that I can slip into the zone as soon as I enter my home, and start work.

Aloe and Vera's massage parlour wasn't far, and Rarity did have a platinum membership …

Just an hour. A massage, a mud-pack and some herbal poultices on my chin … perfect.

Needless to say, Rarity was lost in her own little fantasy of an evening of productive work without her sister trying to 'help' and setting Rarity back by several hours, or Opal clawing up a new dress out of irritation at being ignored. And of course, Applejack surrounded by a trio of hyperactive, unstoppably-energetic Fillies until the sun rose on her family's farm.

So when she pranced forwards and found herself face-to-face with a startled Twilight, who seemingly materialized out of nowhere, with Luna, Zecora and Fluttershy holding hers and each other's tails in their mouths, just in-front of the massage parlour.

“Wha ...” Rarity managed to say before a purple limb wrapped around her neck and dragged her into the massage parlour, followed swiftly by the other three Mares.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well isn't this just perfect!” Twilight rolled her eyes and tried her best to ignore the heat in Rarity's words as the Fashionista spluttered and fumed, even as the twin Ponies who ran the parlour led them into the 'group' room. Whatever her complaining, Rarity's membership privileges and Luna's assurances that all costs would be covered by the Crown had convinced the 'Spa-Twins' to close the shop for the day to give Zecora a chance to explain her plan.

“We art truly sorry, Rarity. We were all looking for reporters behind us or on the roofs, and Twilight was focused on maintaining the invisibility dome.” Luna replied, her words archaic and stiff as she tried to apologise to the fuming Unicorn as the two Spa Ponies led the way. “If you wish to leave, now is the time. We will all swear you left as soon as you helped us book the parlour for ourselves.”

“Sadly, your Highness, that won't matter one blue bit! If I was spotted entering the parlour with you all, and if Zecora's little plan ever goes public, I will be linked to it no matter what you or anyone says.” Rarity sniffed angrily, then turned her eyes to the Spa Twins and frowned. “Besides, I fear this is the very worst place you could have picked to discuss the matter.”

“Here we are, my ladies.” Aloe said, the Earth Pony smiling as she pushed open the door with a hoof, revealing several long, low tables, covered with soft fluffy towels and pots filled with incense sticks, a large, sculpted spa dominating the back of room and floor-to-ceiling mirrors adorning the side-walls. “My sister and I are delighted to serve Royalty, and our dear friend Miss Rarity too, of course!”

After a short time of organising who would get the massages first and Twilight prepping the room with every anti-scrying and privacy spell she could recall, the Ponies sat themselves down for an awkward conversation, Rarity and Fluttershy earning the first round of massages from the Twins.

“Okay, so, this is going to be awkward no matter how we try this ...” Twilight said loudly, giving a sickly smile to the Ponies in the room. “And Aloe, Lotus? I hate to do this but … under the Royal Privilege Act, I am officially ordering you both to not spread word of this conversation under threat of incarceration and-slash-or exile. That's more to give you a legally water-tight excuse for why you can't say anything if the rabid pocket-ferrets outside start trying to lean on you, rather than me saying you can't keep a secret.”

“Oui. My sister and I are known for keeping the secrets of our clientele, Princess Twilight, but thank you for your concern.” Aloe said after a short pause, smiling broadly.

“Okay, good, glad that went okay. Alrighty, moving on … Hermaphrodites. Does anyone know of any, preferably Unicorns for a compatible base-line with Trixie for attempts to reverse Sunset's partially transformation of her posterior, but any of the other three Tribes will also suffice.” Twilight blabbered, turning beet red as every eye in the room turned to stare at her. Hard. “I said it would be awkward no matter how we tried!”

“Uhm … n-n-nooooo?” Fluttershy stammered, turning a shade of pink that would have made Pinkie Pie envious before hiding her face behind her wings, clouds of steam escaping from her ears.

“Up until this all started, I was not even aware of a third gender!” Luna snapped, colouring as well, but not quite so badly. “Knowing what we do now, I suspect that the Neighponese Ambassador and her … her bodyguards might be able to provide some samples, but they would come with political conditions that you might not want to honour. Both the former and the current Empresses has already expressed an interest in you, even when you were Celestia's personal student. As you matured, my sister said the tone of the current Empress's interest shifted from more diplomatic intentions to far less chaste ones, so I shudder to think of what she might demand of you now that you have Ascended to an Alicorn.”

“I … may know a Pony or two, I do deal with specialty clothing for the discerning customer after all, but I cannot divulge their identities. Such things are strictly need-to-know, and I will not risk my patrons being 'outed', especially not the media circus parked right outside our doors.” Rarity replied next, stoically counting tiles on the ceiling.

“Nous ... pouvons connaître de certains poneys, mais ...” Aloe began, before a none-too-subtle nudge from her twin, Lotus, made her blush and say in Equestrian “We know of some Ponies who share this … this Trixie's situation, but we would need to discuss this … discuss this with them. You knowing their identités, I mean. Merde, mais cela pourrait être un problème!”

“It could become, how you say, big problème social, big bad news for them if Ponies were to talk. Equestria tends to be … backwards about sexualité, always making big fuss over silly things.” Lotus added, giving her twin another elbow to the ribs for good measure when the Pony opened her mouth to speak. “Would be très gros problème if our patrons found out, perhaps bad enough we have to leave Ponyville, maybe even go back to Prance.”

“Indeed. I suspect any poor Pony who got publicly outed would be torn to shreds by the Reporters, demonized into some sort of over-sexed degenerate for publicity and impact.” Rarity muttered, tapping a hoof on the bench she was lying down on softly, and sighed as an apologetic Aloe began to give her an apparently much-needed massage. “Oh, goodness, I need this.”

“Yes, well … if I can't find a Hermaphrodite, and most importantly, keep her … is that even the right term for their gender? 'Her' identity a secret, I may have to rely upon the Spell-Scroll and cast Weeaboo's spell on a willing Pony, get the blood-work, tissue samples and … and other samples, and then cancel the spell as quickly as possible, but a natural Hermaphrodite would be best for finding out if Trixie can
be cured.” Twilight stammered, blushing as Rarity and Fluttershy began to moan appreciatively under the skilled hooves of the two Prench masseuses as the knots and kinks in their muscles were teased into relaxing.

“The question that I must ask of you, and awkward though this be, when done are all your tests and trials are done, could you share those samples with me?” Zecora pipped up, grinning broadly as every head in the room swivelled to fixate on her now. “The seed of two genders, mixed by nature in one body, a potent reagent for my potions it makes, and will make my stamina drinks the opposite of shoddy.”

“Wait, are you saying that you use ejaculate in your … eeeeeeeeeee...” Twilight's face turned into a mask of horrified comprehension, and a small, pitiful whine began to fill the room from her slack mouth.

“Zecora! That's … that's not something you should just ask someone for! It's not like ducking next door for a cup of sugar!” Rarity spat, turning bright pink along with most of the room, except for Fluttershy who had apparently bypassed that stage and had turned a solid beet-red all-over and fainted dead away.

“My house is a mess, my stock is all destroyed, a potion for fertility and stamina would earn me enough bits to get some carpenters employed!” The Zebra shot back, pointing a hoof at Rarity. “If Twilight will not share the samples, and no bits in my pocket for the taking, if the Hermaphrodites would be willing to trade, my rear I would not be adverse to shaking.”

Luna fell into a fit of coughing that sounded awfully like muffled laughter, and Twilight's whine raised in volume slightly.

“Wh-wh-what ever happened to using your hoof and sparing your treasure?” Rarity wailed, holding a forelimb over her face dramatically. “Zecora, think about your future! What if word got out you traded sexual favours for ingredients! You'd be ruined, totally ruined!”

“Not Equestrian is this Zebra, your silly-filly little tantrums about sex I do not care! In my homeland we are much less troubled about who is putting what in where.” Zecora rolled her eyes and ignored Rarity's theatrics. “If Twilight will not share the samples, my own supplies I will have to catch, but since there's no bits on my person that I can claim, so I will have to trade my snatc ...”

At this point, steam was coming out the ears of everypony in the room but Zecora and Luna, Aloe and Lotus having retreated to the doors, tails firmly planted between their legs and blushing like school-fillies as Rarity and Zecora argued over the hypothetical 'trade', with Luna shaking with laughter and levitating a limp and bright-red Fluttershy and a frozen, 'Eeeeeeeeee'-ing Twilight out of the room after the Spa-Twins.

“That was … intéressante. Uh, forgive my sister and I, your Highness, but that was … a little more than we were … it was just very ...” Aloe stammered, tail held straight now and a faint blush on her face as she and her twin led the way to the steam-rooms, leaving the arguing Ponies behind. “Please, leave Fluttershy with my sister, and I will take you to our best steam-room … then I must speak with my sister about your … your proposition, Princess Twilight. A decision like this is not to be made lightly, after all!”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeee...” Twilight replied, still frozen in shock.

“Ah, I fear the stress of the last few weeks has finally gotten to her.” Luna chuckled, feeling oddly elated and excited. It had been far too long since she had been around such Ponies, full of life and fire without the claustrophobic customs of the Nobility stiffling everything. “I will make sure that Twilight is made well-aware of any agreements or proposals when she comes back to us.”

“Comment cela pourrait-il éventuellement être pire!” Lotus muttered as she accepted the limp form of Fluttershy and carefully carried her away to some other room, while Aloe lead Luna and the frozen, “Eeeeeeeee”-ing Twilight to the rear of the massage parlour, where a row of burnished wooden doors awaited them, small porthole-style windows their only adornment, before Aloe opened the largest door at the end of the hallway, a billowing cloud of sandalwood-scented steam rushing past her.

“Your Majesties, your room. In a half-hour, either my sister or I will be back to bring you beverages or whatever else you may need. For now, relax and let the steam work its magic.” The Spa-Pony bowed low as Luna trotted past her, still levitating Twilight's rigid form like a Canterlot socialite might carry a miniature dog.

Once she was certain every last inch of the Goddess's ever-flowing tail was out of the way, Aloe carefully shut the door and forced herself to slowly walk back down the steam-room hallway, rounded the corner … and bolted for the staff area, where Lotus would be tending to Fluttershy.

The Princesses' request was … highly unusual, but Aloe was certain that Lotus would agree to it. Aloe was aware that the Ponies that Princess Twilight sought were infamous for their sexual drives, and the prospect of arranging such a rendezvous, possibly even participating, made her tingle all over.

Perhaps if the two Princesses would not be adverse to making it a more … common … arrangement within the safety of Aloe and Lotus's business, to involve her and her sister in their needs, then maybe …

“Aloe. ALOE!” Aloe squeaked and jumped away, glaring at her sister who was glaring right back at her. “Déesses ci-dessus, think of where you are, and who is with us, before you let your concentration go like that! What if the Zebra had come out and see you like so?”

Flushing heavily at the direction where her sister's hoof was pointing, Aloe took a deep breath, centered herself and then tried to calm down, regretfully letting the tingle that had been so pleasant and distracting disappear from her mind and body.

“Better. Miss Fluttershy is still out cold, so if you need a cold shower, now is the time for it. I will go and see to our other guests … you did tell the déesses when we would come to talk to them, yes?” Lotus asked, unable to stop a giggle springing from her lips as Aloe went pink and 'tingly' again at the mention of the two Alicorns in their 'King-size' steam-room. “Poor sœur, all this time you have been pining, and now your heart is all a'flutter, and your mind is full of plans to take advantage of this opportunity, no?”

“And you would say no to them, sœur? To the déesse of Night, Dreams and the pleasures of the Flesh? To the déesse who has haunted my own dreams for these past years? We must acquiesce, we must, I cannot bear to think of this chance slipping through our hooves!” Aloe all but begged her sister, shifting from hoof to hoof, her best 'pleading eyes' on display as Lotus chuckled at her.

“Oui, my sœur, oui. But I am thinking we might perhaps find ourselves overwhelmed. Déesse Luna was infamous for her appetites in the old days … and her wrath when her consorts betrayed her. And nobody knows what stirs déesse Twilight's heart. Arranging this could put us in a great deal of whulp!” Lotus's warning was lost in a full-body hug from her sister, who was squee-ing so hard both Ponies were almost vibrating, before both squeaked in surprise and looked down. “Sœur! I asked that you calm yourself! What if Miss Fluttershy awakes?”

“I could say the same, ma chère sœur! Did you perhaps get a little flustered, a little trop exicted carrying the delectable Miss Fluttershy on your back?” Aloe shot back, then began wriggling in earnest, her sister gasping and holding tightly to her for precious seconds before the two separated and gave each other loaded looks. “Do you suppose ...”

“I do not think Miss Rarity will miss us for another five minutes, given how she was arguing with Zecora ...” Lotus replies slowly, flicking her tail up into the air and giving Aloe a smouldering look as she walked with an exaggerated sway to her hips towards the staff showers. “But no more than five minutes. Nous avons une apparence à maintenir, and you cannot serve in such a state.”

“Only five?” Aloe playfully whined, all but skipping after her sister, stopping only briefly to tug a fluffy towel over the comatose Fluttershy, her eyes trailing longingly over the soft curves and lovely features of the Pegasus before trotting to the showers, where the sound of water splattering on the tiles and traces of steam in the air awaited her.

And soon, perhaps, there would be more than just her sister waiting for her in that small cubicle with hooves full of body-soap and a wicked, welcoming smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeee-wha?” Twilight gasped, coughing slightly as the steam-heavy air flooded down her throat and tickled at her lungs. “Whe-where are we?”

“We are in a steam room, the … the pink Spa-Pony brought us here after Zecora and Rarity began to squabble about … about payment for ingredients.” Luna replied, trying to not burst into laughter as Twilight's face went through a range of expressions, most of them involving some blend of horror. “Truly, Twilight, after everything we have been through in the last few days, I would have thought this would not be an issue.”

“I well I guess I just … just don't think about it when we're … you know!” The smaller Alicorn spluttered, flustered, and hid her face behind her wings. “But at least I know whose … stuff … is in my mouth! Zecora sold me a crate of stamina-potions for some study-binging sessions a few days before I ascended and now I can't stop thinking about what was in the potion!”

“Truly?” Luna asked, leaning back and taking a deep breath of the steam-filled air, trying not to burst out laughing at the expression on Twilight's face.

“Luna, the last few days have been the only time I've ever, erm, 'gotten off'. Sex and all this … stuff, it's all still so strange to me and I ...” Twilight's babbling was cut-off as Luna's eyes snapped open and her hoof reached out, pushed through her tremblings wings and covered the purple Alicorn's mouth.

“Wait, my apologies, Twilight, but what? You mean to say you do not, what is the term Ponies use nowadays, hoof it?”

“Uhm … no? I kinda can't, since Spike is there all the time. And sex seemed to be something bad, something to be ashamed of, after what I did to Celestia when I fought her … her toy as a Foal, so I never really experimented past ...” Blushing, the Alicorn made a vague movement towards her loins with a hoof, before folding herself into her wings again. “It didn't help that I was under observation all the time by the Royal Guard for my own safety, so I never knew if or when somebody would be on the other side of a wall or watching me in the library...”

“So you mean that that night was your first real experience with an orgasm?” Luna muttered, mentally kicking herself. The bout of rutting that the Sympathy had forced on them had been some of the most intense sex she'd ever had, and Luna had never been shy about being intense in the bedroom, but now Luna came to the horrific realisation that Twilight thought every orgasm had to be so intense, because she'd never reached a peak before that night.

“Well … yes? I mean, it was the first time I actually, uhm, finished, I guess.” Twilight replied from within the 'safety' of her wings, then giggled. “Are we supposed to do, uhm, 'that' when a Mare orgasms?”

“The squirting? I believe some mares do, but most never do that. I know I don't … and I wish I had known you did before you got me in the eyes that time.” Luna replied softly, taking another deep breath of the steam and moving slightly away from Twilight and extending her wings fully. “Twilight, move away a little and extend your wings for as long as you can. Let the steam work its way through all of your feathers, it will help loosen any old feathers or dead skin.”

“But I've only had wings for a … oh ...” Twilight began, only to extend her wings fully and given them a shake and have half a dozen feathers fall out.

“Pegasi, and Alicorns too for that matter, will shed feathers when we are stressed. And today's events definitely count as stressful: Our r-r-relationship being outed by your friends, attacked by a Succuponi and almost being corrupted by her and then having to face the media's hounds with next to no training.” The Lunar Princess explained, shaking her own wings and noting with annoyance a number of her own feathers coming loose. “And tomorrow we have some of Celestia's Royal Guards attaching themselves to us at the hips. This may be the last time we have any privacy at all.”

“Okay, in that regards … Luna, I have a question for you, and I'm fairly sure it's almost as awkward as what I asked the Spa Twins. Our … this pro … the Sympathy. It was caused by us having magically compatible auras, correct?”

“Yes.”

“And the Sympathy had decayed the spell you used to control your Estrus, which in turn is making our resonance even worse, to the point where both of us are now in Estrus because of the Sympathy linking us, correct?”

“Yes … where are you going with this?”

“Well … I'm starting to feel the effects of the Estrus very strongly, so I need to know how you're not sending every Stallion within twenty feet of you into a rutting frenzy! I'm getting dizzy, sweating heavily and … and I'm getting itchy down there. I'm afraid I'm going to go into full Estrus in the middle of the street and cause a scene ...”

“Oh. Oh, I see.” Luna replied, colouring slightly. “Well, I assume that Celestia and our niece, Cadence, were able to teach you about … courtly matters and the finer points of Alicorns?”

“Yes, the tail is always down, measured steps, addressing the various Noble Houses and Ambassadors from the various nations, never allow anyone to take a sample of my blood or body or accept any gifts with even the slightest magical aura, but I don't remember any lessons on how to not become the center of a pile of frantically-humping Stallions!” The newest Princess stammered, her wings twitching back to her body before Twilight took a deep breath and forced them out again. “Is there some way to neutralize the hormones we produce during Estrus? Some sort of spell or potion that you are using that you could share with me?”

“Not …not really. But Twilight, you should not be in any danger. As an Alicorn, our, ehrm, scent during Estrus is very difficult for normal Ponies to be affected by, let alone detect. Part of our Ascension to a higher state of being also brings its own challenges, namely that our bodies are no longer strictly … compatible with normal Ponies, hence why my Sister has had a handful of children over the millenia. Your hormones may affect the Ponies around you, but right now I suspect they would not have nearly the same effect that normally plagues Stallions around an in-season Mare. That said … it would perhaps be best if we had only female bodyguards for the time being, in-case I am wrong.” Luna explained, waving her wings as she spoke and sending waves of fresh air over the brazier, the flames leaping high for a moment before the steam returned and muffled the dancing tongues of heat once again. “Perhaps it would be best to contact Celestia again and bring our concerns up with her. As the first, and oldest, of the Alicorns, she would probably know more about this than either of us. And Cadence too should probably be brought up to speed.”

“I'm not sure I'm happy baring all of this to Celestia, let alone my sister-in-law, but … I need advice, and I don't want to put you in a place where you are brought down because we're … together.” Sighing, Twilight's wings drooped, feathers bending as they fell against the polished wooden bench of the steam-room. “I wonder what Faust was thinking when she made Ponies go through Estrus. Everything itches, we don't think straight, its all so … illogical!”

“Twilight, you are not saying that right now you're … itching?” Luna asked, a smile creeping across her face as she regarded the other Alicorn just a wing-span from her in the steam-room.

The very private and secure steam-room, with a good twenty minutes before the accomodating Spa-Ponies came back to check on them ...

And the best way to rid one's self of Estrus was to engage in coitus, after all ...

Twilight's grumbled affirmative was lost quickly in a startled Meep, and then soft whispers of endearment and noises of pleasure as Luna's wings and flowing mane and tail engulfed the smaller Alicorn, pulling the two together into a bundle of feathers and condensed night sky as the steam thickened and filled the air.

Chapter 34

CHAPTER 34

Applejack sighed, feeling the weight of the heavy box on her back shift slightly as her hooves navigated the hard-packed dirt-road that led back to the Apple family orchard.

Today had been an absolute nightmare. First a fiend had come to town and threatened the safety of the townsponies, then those snooty reporters from Canterlot had tried to pin the whole mess on Twilight and Princess Luna, and Applejack had then been asked to spend the afternoon keeping an eye on Trixie, of all Ponies, while Twilight went out to see what she could do to cure Trixie of her fiendish tail and to see what Zecora had wanted from the purple Alicorn.

And of course Rainbow Dash had started getting all excited about those perm-afro-dykes that Twilight had been talking about, and that Trixie had admitted to being one of them. Having to spend the afternoon trying to keep Dashie from tearing through Twilight's library for some sort of magical scroll-thingy, and then dealing with Trixie's erection …

Did not jus' think about that. Applejack grunted, shifting the box to a more comfortable position. Trixie apparently had a very low tolerance for flirting, as all Rainbow had to do with flash a bit of her flanks and the Show-Mare would just 'sprout' on the spot. And it was an impressive sprouting, even if Applejack didn't want to admit it. Long and thick, pink, pulsating flesh that …

Applejack stopped, gently put the box onto the ground and put her hat ontop of it, before jumping a nearby fence and running over to the nearest tree, slamming her head against the trunk hard enough to see stars.

Mother-buckin' spawn of a … NOT THINKIN' ABOUT THAT!

Having to sit outside the bathroom door and stand guard while Trixie took care of her 'problem', with Spike sitting outside the window with his trusty frypan in-case Rainbow tried to bust in through the small porthole-style window, had been aggravating in a whole new way to Applejack. It wasn't like she was ignorant of the sounds Ponies made during … personal time. Living in her family's old house meant privacy was limited, and there had been several incidents where either Big Mac or herself had walked in on the other 'taking care of business' in the shower or their own bedrooms, or had to wrap a pillow over their heads to muffle the noises of somebody in the middle of 'happy time'.

There wasn't any laws, so to speak, about Ponies 'keeping it in the family', due to the chaos that Estrus could cause and the marrying habits of the Nobility, but outright incestual relationships were held in low esteem in polite society, and after all, that one estrus aside, she and Big Mac were not that way inclined. The only Ponies who seemed to think sibling love was wonderful were probably those who'd never had a sibling in the first place!

And being rural farm-ponies, Applejack had long been teased about a supposed relationship with her brother as a Filly. Tartarus on fire, Carrot Top still spread those rumors every chance she got, spiteful she-mule of a Pony that she was, and then seemed to wonder why it was that Big Mac refused to have anything to do with her, even in the middle of spring!

And that lack of privacy, coupled with a very healthy body and a painfully long period of enforced celibacy had left Applejack in what was commonly known as a 'sexual drought'. Just thinking about sex of any kind was enough to make her heart race now, and having her face all but rubbed in the fact that Twilight was getting it on with Princess Luna on what appeared to be a daily basis, and now there was a Mare with a Stallion's plumbing who had gotten an erection so big that it had actually pushed the table up off the floor, who had literally been within hoof's reach for several hours.

An' of course, ah was dumb enough to offer to look after the Cutiemark Crusaders tonight … no dippin' down to the swimmin' hole to cool off fer me tonight. The Farm-Pony sighed and trudged back to the road, where her beloved hat sat ontop of the heavy box. An' now Twi's asked me to keep that thing safe … ain't too keen on havin' it near me or mah kin, but Twi did say that only a Unicorn could make it work, an' there ain't no Unicorns on mah farm. 'Sides, who'd look fer that damn Spell-Scroll on a farm?

“It'll just be for a few days, Applejack. Throw it anywhere on the farm you feel will be safe from prying eyes and twitchy hooves. The box has been magically sealed and warded, it's just a case of finding somewhere to hide the infernal thing until I can cure Trixie and then … then we're having a bonfire, and that damn Scroll is being used as the kindling!”

“Heh … ain't never thought I'd see the day when Twi would get all excited about burning a book … err, scroll!” The Farm-Pony couldn't help but laugh as she remembered Twilight's expression as the Unicorn had looked at the box one last time. Utter loathing and chagrin had been clearly visible on the 'Princess's' face, and a healthy heaping of guilt too. Poor Mare was probably still blaming herself for not properly destroying the original, flawed Scroll that had brought Trixie and Sunset together in the first place.

Of course, the news that a Mare could have … that … with just a single spell brought a whole heap of confusing, conflicting thoughts to the Farm-Mare's mind. Applejack didn't have much of a preference when it came to genders, but she did have to admit she had found more pleasure with a Mare, or at least none of the Stallions she'd been with had inspired any need in her to go 'straight'.

And Rainbow Dash's … attitude towards Luna and Twilight was obnoxiously and obviously jealousy-based, and it didn't exactly make Applejack's own green-eyed monster sit quiet either. It wasn't as if Rainbow Dash and Applejack had never crossed the line into 'really close friends' on more than a few occasions, especially when hard cider and drunken daring entered the picture, but Applejack had told the Pegasus clearly that her family's farm would always come first and foremost, and in turn Rainbow has made her case that joining the Wonderbolts was a dream that the rainbow-maned Pegasi would never give up for anypony.

That the Pegasus had basically turned around and started to really push her flirting with Twilight, especially after turning down Applejack the week before, was really grinding Applejack's gears, coupled with the Farm-Pony's already formidably-repressed sexual desires bubbling up inside her and all the strange thoughts that all the day's ups and downs had filled her head with, and right now poor Applejack didn't have the time to deal with all of this, not with the Cutiemark Crusaders ...

Well, speak of the Devil, and she shall appear! Applejack thought wryly as she saw the infamous trio of hyperactive Fillies rushing through the southern field, axes clutched in their mouths …. Wait, wait wait wait, brain, back up a second there, was that Applebloom with a …

“APPLEBLOOM! WHA' ARE YOU DOIN' IN THE SOUTHERN FIELD? AN' WHA' HAVE BIG MAC AN' AH SAID 'BOUT Y'ALL AN' AXES?”

“But we're gonna be Cutiemark Crusader Lumber-Jacks!”

“NO! AN' GET AWAY FROM THOSE TREES, DAMMIT! Y'ALL AIN'T USIN' NO AXES NEITHER, YOUNG MISSY! WE TALKED 'BOUT THIS AFTER Y'ALL NEARLY CUT DOWN TWI'S LIBRARY!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Majesty.” The Warrior murmured, tapping nervously on the broom-closet. “Majesty, the Large, Terrifying One has left, it is safe to come out.”

For several moments, there was only silence, before a whiff of pheromones that all but shouted 'relief' wafted out from under the door.

“Are you sure? She is … formidable. I do not wish to face her in my current condition.” Queen Chrysalis murmured, opening the door a crack to peer around nervously.

“Yes, Majesty. The Large, Terrifying One has retreated to secure something she refers to as 'toys' for the Offspring.” The Warrior replied slowly, his short, sharp-edged wings clattering softly with nervousness. “Apparently Pony-Offspring require something called 'toys'. When I enquired as to what 'toys' were, the Large, Terrifying One gave me a look that … that made me … made me ...”

“At ease, Soldier. That Mare is enough to scare an entire Hive, let alone just a handful of Soldiers and Drones.” The Queen of the Hive said softly, slipping out of broom-closet and putting a hoof on her Soldier's shoulder. “Now, excuse me, I must … refresh myself.”

“Majesty. The One-Who-Pees-In-Faces led your Scout to a place where Ponies pass their wastes and clean themselves.” The Soldier replied, sending an impression of the building's lay-out to the Queen through the Hive-Mind … and was nearly bowled over as the Queen moved as fast as her condition allowed towards the desired section.

She had been hiding in the broom-closet for some time, the Soldier reasoned, picking himself up and following at a gallop after his Queen to stand guard until she emerged, and then assume his role as bodyguard once again.

Reaching the desired room, the Soldier was greeted by the Pony his simple mind had tagged as the One-Who-Pees-In-Faces and the Drone who had assumed the role of Scout, who were apparently arguing over whether the Scout could remove her wastes on her own, or if One-Who-Pees-In-Faces had to be in the same room as her to allow the Scout to fulfil her mission from the Queen to be with her target at all times.

Scout, report. He sent to the smaller Changeling through the Hive-Mind, and was given a flash of images and impressions. The One-Who-Pees-In-Faces apparently had an issue with the Scout's gender for some reason and was acting strangely around her, the Queen has sequestered herself in the nearest cubicle and demanded soft paper, for some reason, and the Queen's Offspring were being tended to by Bravest Pony, the mate of the Large, Terrifying One, and thus were to be considered safe for the time being.

Any entity, even a Pony, that could mate successfully with the Large, Terrifying One and survive, let alone multiple times, must surely be a veteran combatant, at least to the Soldier's admittedly limited world-view.

“Look, I've already explained how to use the toilet and the purpose of the paper in there, just go already! I won't move from this spot, I promise. I'll stand right by this Changeling here until you get back.” The-One-Who-Pees-In-Faces sighed, putting a hoof to his face in what the Hive-Mind told him was an expression of exasperation.

“You promise … this one will hold you to that.” The Scout said after several moments of flurried conversations within the Hive-Mind, with the Queen firmly telling everyone to disengage from her while she tended to her ablutions and the surviving Infiltrators explaining that the Caste that the One-Who-Pees-In-Faces belong to would normally hold true to such promises, before ducking into the nearby room with unseemly haste.

“Are all females like that? Female Changelings, I mean?” One-Who-Pees-In-Faces asked the Soldier, his posture one of weary amusement.

“No.” Soldier replied bluntly

“Uh ….” One-Who-Pees-In-Faces said after a few moments of awkward silence. “Uh, you're not a female … are you?”

“No.” Soldier responded. One-Who-Pees-In-Faces should be keeping an eye out for possible threats to the Queen, not enquiring about Changeling genders. He was already a pitiful physical specimen for his Caste-designation, to the Soldier's mind, and he should be grateful that his Queen, the White-Sun-Pony, had not reassigned him to Kattian-herding duty.

“So … what's the deal with the Kattians?” One-Who-Pees-In-Faces asked nervously as the silence dragged on.

It was going to be a long wait for the Queen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Honey?” Shining Armor whispered, his breath hot on her mane as the 'Crystal' Princess stared out the window of the Royal Carriage, watching as the waving, smiling Crystal Ponies came and went as the carriage took the royal couple down to the newly-built station, and the heavily armored steam-powered train that would take them to Canterlot … and a confrontation with the Bug Queen.

“I don't want to talk about it right now, Shining. I just ...” Cadence sighed and pulled away from her husband, trying desperately to remember the breathing exercises that the therapist had tried to teach her, to let the fear and the anger flow out of her.

Shining only meant well. Tartarus on fire, everypony only meant well, but every time she heard the words Changeling or Chrysalis or even Wedding, horribly enough, all she could think about was the weeks spent in that crystaline prison, with her captor popping in thrice daily to provide food and water and gloat with almost childish glee over how well her plans were going.

For the most part it had felt like Cadence was being baby-sat, not kept hostage, while at others times Chrysalis had seemed at turns regretful, spiteful or even friendly towards her captive.

Probably all she was trying to do was practice on me. Princess Cadence thought glumly, struggling to organise the arguments and points she felt she might need to convince 'Aunty' Celestia how dangerous it was to treat with a hostile force like the Changelings. Documents detailing the ease with which they had infiltrated Canterlot, the injuries sustained by the common Ponies, the ineffectiveness of the Royal Guards against Changelings disguised as their fellow troops had all been checked, double-checked and packed away in heavily-secured cases that would require the magical signatures of either Shining Armor or Cadence herself to open without setting off alarms … every step had been taken that protocol and Shining Armor's Royal Guard-training demanded, but ...

It was supposed to have been her big day. The day she had dreamed of since she was small, and in Cadence's case, she had literally been swept off her hooves by an actual white knight. And it had nearly been ruined by the Changeling Queen, her beloved Shining nearly stolen away by …

By a dark reflection of what I might have been. Cadence finally admitted to herself. How easy it would have been to reach out, grab Shining's mind and change it back to loving her, to fight the Changeling Queen on equal footing on the battlefield of Shining Armor's mind and heart … but at best, the cost would have been losing all of Shining's trust in her, at worst burning out his mind and leaving him a drooling husk. That his feelings for her were indeed natural, and not an artificial construct she had forced on him, was a cornerstone of their relationship.

Cadence jerked in surprise as two strong white limbs wrapped around her body and pulled her back against Shining Armor's chest, a box of tissues being levitated in-front of her face.

“Honey, please, talk to me.” Shining Armor whispered, hugging her from behind, his magic deftly pulling a tissue from the box and dabbing at her face. “I could hear you crying from the other side of the royal train-carriage … do you want to stay here, and we send Ambassador Silicate? The Minotaurs will understand if we reassign her given the nature of the situation, I'm sure.”

Cadence gave a muffled sob as she put a hoof over Shining's arms, then shook her head quickly. “No, Shining, we can't risk it. The Minotaurs of Labryinthia and the Maze Republic are already on edge and their squabbling over territory and resources is on the verge of turning into another full-blown war. We can't risk pulling Silicate out of the region, not now, when she's making the first in-roads to a truce, a real and sustainable peace-accord, between the two Minotaur nations in centuries.”

“Honey, you're crying. I don't care about that, I just want to make sure you're alright.” Shining whispered, hugging her tightly as Cadence sagged back into the comforting embrace of her husband, savoring the sensation of having him holding her safe, both physically and emotionally.

“I will be alright when we convince my aunt that the Changelings are a true threat that we cannot risk diplomacy on. When Chrysalis is banished for all time from beyond our borders, and our Ponies, crystal or otherwise, are safe again.” The Princess of Love murmured then sighed as Shining began wiping away her running make-up again. “Chrysalis pulled the wool over everypony's eyes. Friends I had known for years, even the Princesses, even … even ...”

“Even me? Oh honey ...” Shining whispered, pulling away slightly. “Honey … there is nothing I would like more than to see that Faust-awful bug loaded into a catapult and shot as far away from Pony-held lands as possible, but we can't hide. Not from her, not from what she did, not from the mistakes we've made.”

Mistakes we've made.

Cadence couldn't help but shudder at those words. The Honeymoon had ended after only two days, both of them too shaken up once the adrenaline and the joy of being together had worn off. An hour in the shower, supposedly getting ready to finally consumate their marriage, but instead Shining had spent the night holding Cadence under the hot water of the shower while she sobbed and begged him to stay with her, to not forget her.

It had been … hard. Chrysalis had done more damage to their relationship than any of the tabloids or scheming Nobles had ever come close to. Months of therapy with the Royal Psychologist, the arguments and the make-up cuddling afterwards, and finally when they had just started to get back to the same feeling of closeness they had enjoyed just before Shining had proposed … Celestia had demanded they head north to a tiny mining community and that they be prepared to stay there for several months if necessary, with a sealed scroll containing orders for them, a scroll that Celestia had forbidden them from opening until 'the northlands glitter with crystal spires'.

For several weeks, the couple had worried that Celestia had banished them for some political gambit, likely to keep them away from the Shadow Court or perhaps to keep them out of the way while Luna tried to reintroduce herself to the Noble Council again, when the Crystal Empire had appeared all at once in a single explosion of light, shimmering into phase out of a snow-storm, the Crystal Ponies disorientated and confused as the miners ran for their lives from what they feared was an invasion.

With the northlands 'glittering' with crystal spires, the couple had finally cracked open the scroll and read the message, which was simply 'retake the Empire by any means necessary'.

You always were a pain with your love of obscure meanings and word-play, Celestia. Cadence sighed and leaned back into Shining's warm body, reliving that day in her mind's eye.

To Shining's credit, he had charged into the newly-restored Empire, alone, unarmed and wearing only his dress-armor and began interrogating the disorientated Crystal Ponies to know what the strange equines were doing in Equestria … and had immediately summoned Cadence when he discovered the 'invaders' were instead prisoners, the victims of a banishment spell that had just lifted.

Days had stretched into weeks, the miners having taken the train, the only land-route link back to civilised lands, by force from the token Guard presence, bundling their families and belongings into the train's cabins and cargo-trailers before fleeing, leaving only Shining, Cadence and a trashed mining camp to care for an entire city suffering amnesia in the middle of one of the most hostile environments in the known world. Warrants were still in circulation for the miners for their assault on the Royal Guard protecting the train, and on a somewhat shallow and petty level, Cadence hoped the miners remained on the run for a long, long time. Their selfish actions had forced Shining and herself into an almost untenable situation and left them to try to care for an entire nation of invalids on their own, with no support and precious little in the way of supplies.

Thankfully, Cadence's own magic had been a tolerable substitute for the Crystal Heart to feed on with the Crystal Ponies still confused and despondant, but there was no way a single Alicorn's magic could fully charge the Heart. Indeed, the moment Cadence had stopped charging the Crystal Heart, the life-giving aura of the mystical gem would begin to fade, allowing the icy grip of winter to return to blanket the city and making life an absolute misery for the earth-bound Crystal Ponies. Shining Armor had been forced to cover the city in his barrier-spell, but the problem was such a spell also negated messages sent via magic, so if anyone had been trying to contact them during the rare periods of sleep Cadence had grabbed while Shining stopped the city from being buried under snow, neither of them would have been aware of it.

A single vial of Dragon Fire had miraculously survived the miners' looting and rampaging through the mining camp and the train-station, and once the Crytal Ponies had uncovered the treasure, Shining had sent a message to Celestia with half the vial, having to send close to a hundred pages to properly explain the situation to the Solar Princess, and then he'd used the rest to alert Celestia about the return of Sombra, using the additional Dragon Fire to 'supercharge' the spell so that it would close the gap in a few hours, instead of several days due to the distance and leylines the teleported scroll would have to traverse.

And Celesita had sent the Bearers of Harmony instead of an army. In the end, it had been blind luck that Twilight had been able to find the Crystal Heart, and it was a near thing that allowed Spike and Cadence to get the heart before the Shade that had once been Sombra could have reclaimed it.

And now that same Princess Celestia was taking the Changeling Queen into Canterlot, supposedly under heavy guard, but both Cadence and her husband were intimately aware of just how powerful the Changeling Queen was.

If she was faking her injuries, all Ponies could be in grave danger. Celestia gambled far too much on Twilight's abilities, and Cadence wasn't willing to risk the lives of everypony on the continent if Queen Chrysalis was able to magically charm the Alicorn of the Sun the same way she had once charmed Shining Armor.

And if she wasn't faking … then Cadence was going to make damn sure that the treacherous Changeling would never be in a position to steal love, either from her beloved Ponies or her dear husband, ever again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So...”

“So?”

“SO!”

“Not helping, Spike.” Twilight sighed, rubbing her face with a hoof. Luna's spontaneous little … display in the steam-room notwithstanding, today had been aggravating in the extreme. Aloe and Lotus had been exceptionally wide-eyed after catching the two Princesses in a most undignified tangle and had fled back to the staff bathroom, shouting apologies as they tried to run away with their hind-legs crossed, Zecora and Rarity had been caught swapping sex stories that probably would have made Spike's scales pop off in shock and poor Fluttershy was still unconscious and had had to be carried back to her cottage by the Zebra.

Now, Twilight found herself sitting, once again, at the kitchen table with Luna, Trixie and Spike as they prepared the ingredients for Spike's soup. According to the information given to them by the Unicorn Royal Guards, the Pegasi that had helped bring Celestia and her Royal Guards to Ponyville should be waking up shortly … and they would be ravenous.

And Trixie and Luna were squaring off, trying to compete in who could cut up the pumpkins faster for some obscure reason, and ruining her cutting boards and kitchen knives in the process. The bathroom had also been demolished, with Trixie muttering something about 'oversexed Pegasi' and 'fat-plotted Earth Ponies' when questioned on why the window-frame was almost completely knocked out of the window itself.

There is so much I don't know. Point 1, what is going on between Luna and myself. Point 2, why are the Ponies so hellbent on trying to pin all this madness on the Princesses. Point 3, how come Trixie was able to resist being changed into a Succuponi. Point 4, where did all this sexually-charged weirdness come from and why has it decided I am somehow supposed to be involved in all of this! Twilight sighed again and levitated a discarded kitchen knife away from the 'dueling' Trixie and Luna and began rubbing a whetstone up and down the edge, wincing at the way the much-abused blade caught on the stone's surface.

“So … sleeping arrangements. I'm in the basement with the magical not-quite-a-fiend Mare with the raging yard-long hard-on, you and Luna will be camping in your bedroom, and the Guards … we're just leaving them in the hallway? I mean, they have pillows and blankets, but really, we're going to leave them on the floor?” Spike complained loudly, measuring cups of seasoning into the large cauldron that Twilight had been using for potions, but Spike had cleaned and had filled with hot water, and now with clawfuls of spices, segments of butternuts and chunks of pumpkin.

“As much as I would like to see the Guards given proper sleeping arrangements, given that certain loud and somewhat aggressive sections of the local population seems to believe the Guards have unfairly treated them, I feel that it would likely be more dangerous to have them sleeping in the local hotels or hospices.” Luna pointed out, using her magic to manipulate three kitchen knives at once, chunking her pumpkin into uneven portions with a smug look on her face as Trixie tried to drive her own knife through the thick skin of the pumpkin with obvious effort. “They might be uncomfortable, but at least we can ensure they remain unmolested. The actions taken by this … Carrot Top, and the two fillies, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, have worried me quite a bit. Such attitudes towards the Royal Guard, let alone Celestia herself, seem very, very out of character for our little Ponies!”

“Tr-Trixie apologises for s-speaking out of turn, but Princess Luna, you ha-have not been talking with the Ponies outside of Canterlot, have you?” The blue show-mare asked, slowly working her knife through the thick skin of the pumpkin with obvious effort. “Baltimare, Stalliongrad, Las Pegasus, Neigh-York, everywhere Trixie has gone in the past few years, there are always groups of Ponies who are always rabble-rousing against the Royal Guards, and even Princess Celestia, long may her Sun shine on us all. Many newspapers and radio-hosts ask questions that Trixie believes are loaded to make other Ponies question Princess Celestia's worthiness to rule, to lead the nation.”

“Unacceptable.” Luna muttered, and Spike snorted in agreement, twin jets of green flame shooting out of his nose in his anger. “I am aware that many Ponies seem to think the recent attacks are my fault, but to blame Celestia as well, after three hundreds years of peace between Ponies, Gryphons, Diamond Dogs and Minotaurs under of her rule? Completely unacceptable!”

“Its the Shadow Council's fault. They want Unicorn nobility to control Equestria and all the Ponies who live within its borders, and since Princess Celestia is immortal and cannot be removed by force since she controls the sun and could effectively drop the world into an endless night or sweltering perpetual day if threatened in a military coup, and she is known and loved for her continuous efforts to keep the three Pony Tribes, as well as the other nations and species, from going to war again, they undercut her at every opportunity in parliament and in the media outlets they own or can manipulate.” Twilight explained, holding the kitchen knife up to inspect the edge before assisting Trixie with cutting her pumpkin into segments, rolling her eyes at Luna's pouting and Trixie's blushing. “My father told me they were originally just another group of Nobles petitioning the Solar Throne for their own self-interests, and were fairly incompetent even by Canterlot standards by all accounts, but the Blue family took control of the Bloc six or seven generations ago, and turned it into a focused effort to unseat the Princess through her own constitution and laws.”

“One wonders why Celestia tolerates their existence then.” Luna sniffed angrily, scraping her pumpkin-chunks to one side and levitating another pumpkin over, before staring at her blunted knife and scowling at it before picking up the whetstone. “Once, Ponies worshipped the very ground my sister and I walked on, literally in some cases, and I distinctly remember how much effort it took to get them to believe we were not in-fact Gods. Now, Celestia has crafted a world of almost-perfect peace … and those same Ponies are agitating against her like she was a mere feudal lord.”

“Tyranny, that's why.” Spike said loudly in the silence as Trixie and Twilight tried to digest the thought that third Pony in the room had actively forced their Tribe to stop worshipping her. “After I had my growth-spurt on my last birthday, Princess Celestia took me aside and gave me the 'Why we can't just force Ponies to do things' talk. Princess Celestia said the reason she allowed groups opposed to her to rise up and gain traction was that so if she ever made a mistake, there would be voices willing and able to call her out on it.”

“Be that as it may, Sir Spike, I fear my sister has, in her intent to not be like the monsters we faced together in the past, given those who would attempt to do just that all the room they need to grow into a true threat not just to herself, but all of the sentient beings that dwell within Equestria.” The Lunar Princess retorted in a soft voice, dropping the whetstone onto the table and manifesting three blades of magic from her horn to dice the pumpkins again, this time into almost perfectly equal cubes. “This reeks of the Bloody Horn Rebellion, all over again.”

Chapter 35

CHAPTER 35

“So … that's the situation, Sirs. The Changelings appear to be earnest in their desire to surrender, and the Queen herself is in poor physical health, at least she gives that appearance, and she is with three … foals. I believe she is unable and unwilling to put up a fight, and no-doubt the civilian staff of the outpost have already disseminated the story to the local gossip circles.” The short, balding Pony who apparently ran the Outpost wound down his explanation, apparently nonplussed by the enraged expression on Brass Star's face, nor the sneering condescension from the leader of the Fourth Circle Magi, whose comrades surrounding him and ran detection spell after detection spell over him and a Unicorn Border Guard beside him, but for some reason the Unicorn didn't seem … important enough to pay attention to. “I would advise that we treat the Queen as a visiting dignitary, a potentially hostile one with health-conditions that require immediate attention, and proceed accordingly.”

“Yes, I'm certain I will take the advice of a Pony who has been exposed to one of the most potent wielders of mind-warping magic at face-value.” Brass Stars snorted, his wings trembling with ill-concealed anger. “Surely, you are the font of all wisdom, Peach Seed.”

“There's no need to be snide, Pegasus.” The bitter, grey-maned Unicorn Mage in charge of the Circle Magi snorted as his comrades shook their heads and stepped back from the two Border Guards. “There are no traces of any magic on these two other than low-level protection wards woven into their uniforms and residual auras from a scrying device and the usual Unicorn levitation spells. There are at least no magical methods capable of defeating spells casting by the Fourth Circle, but there might be something chemical instead. Nobody knows if Changelings are venomous or not, or if their cocoons have hypnotic side-effects. We will begin a deep-level scan for anything unusual in their blood-streams … I would suggest standing back, else your … steroidal tendencies might come into question.”

Twilight Glimmer found her attention focusing on the portly Earth Pony, and tried to ignore the hissing remarks from Brass Stars that he didn't need pills to be a Royal Guard or enhance his wings, and most definitely told herself she didn't hear the comment about the Fourth Circle needing those broad gold bands on their horns to keep them 'rigid' while casting. That is not going to win you any help getting promoted, asshole, even if the Fourth Circle Magi is being a bigoted old goat.

“Uh, sirs? As … enlightening as this is, perhaps we should take the Changeling Queen to the train now, before she hears your 'conversation' and decides she actually can make a move?” The Unicorn Guard that had been standing next to Peach Seed said loudly, flicking his ears in annoyance as the leader of the Magi and Brass Stars glared at each other, the other soldiers and magi shuffling awkwardly.

Glimmer blinked, feeling a rush of irritation at the Unicorn, wondering why somepony so … unimportant … would bother speaking … and shook her head, wincing at the stabbing pain behind her eyes. Why would she even think that about somepony else? Especially a fellow Border-Guard?

“Brass Stars, sir Mage, perhaps the Border-Guard has a point? The sooner the Changeling Queen is taken into custody, the safer the local inhabitants will be?” Twilight Glimmer hoped her face was still the same blank mask she had cultivated under Brass Star's tenure, but given the evil glares she was receiving from the two Stallions, the young Mare had the horrible feeling the mask had 'slipped'. “Forgive me for stating the obvious, but surely the Fourth Circle's carriage would be ...”

“Yes, you are forgiven for speaking out of turn.” The leader of the Fourth Circle Magi snapped, his eyes still locked onto Brass Stars’s, the two Stallions trying to glare each other into submission.

Coughing, the irritatingly un-important Unicorn border-guard made a couple of quick pointing motions to the cloth-covered wagon and gave an awkward smile, before mouthing the words ‘forget him’. Fighting down the unusual compulsion to ignore the Stallion, Glimmer forced herself to look over towards the wagon, noting with surprise there were a few of the other Magi were casting spells upon the structure with their eyes closed in concentration, and a younger Stallion with four brand-new golden rings on his horn giving her a wry smile.

“You watch your mouth around my people, you old goat! We’ve bent over backwards to accommodate you, so you’d better bucking start showing some appreciation or you can take your entire group of nerds back to Canterlot …”

“I will not be spoken to by some testosterone-riddle mule like that. I am Greysmoke, one of the most senior Magi in Equestria. You will submit to my authority, Pegasus, or so help me …”

“I don’t submit to anyone, especially not an old goat who is so far past his prime he should be in a nursing home!”

Oh Faust no. Glimmer sighed and stepped back slowly, avoiding any sudden movements that might attract the attention, and ire, of the two Stallions as they tried to glare each other down and began firing off vicious insults at each other. Just what we need, right when one of the biggest threats to Equestria is sitting not more than a hundred meters from us all … the young Mare noted that most of the convoy had backed up and away from the two Stallions, wanting no part in the argument between two senior officers that were acting like a pair of Foals squabbling over a teat.

“Ma’am.” The younger Magi whispered, his hoof stroking the cloth sides of the ‘wagon’ with oddly affectionate motions as the other Magi not looking on to the spat between the two arrogant Stallions channelled spells that Glimmer couldn’t even begin to identify into the cloth and wood of the vehicle, their faces expressionless masks. “I know this is highly irregular, but I suggest we go and … escort … the Changeling Queen before our commanders lose sight of our shared mission. Once she is secured inside the wagon’s interior, we’re certain our spells will be able to turn back any attempts to subvert our will back onto the Changeling herself.”

“Errr, it won’t kill her if she does do her … mind-magic-thingy, will it?” Both Glimmer and the young Magi flinched as the owner of the voice, the irritatingly un-important Border Guard, seemingly appeared behind them out of thin air, who took their startled looks with an expression of tired resignation. “It’d look pretty bad if we took a visiting member of Royalty into custody only for her to die in transit, after all.”

“We … don’t believe so?” The Magi replied after several awkward moments, in a tone of terrified uncertainty. “We’ve yet to actually test the spells and wards against Changeling magic, actual authentic Changeling mana-waves. Much of the work is just … extrapolation and guess work, I’d say. Soooo I suggest we inform her royal high insectness to not cast anything within the wagon if she doesn’t want her head to explode.”

“Great. Terrific. Look, I’ll go fetch the Queen, you guys sort out the convoy.” The odd Unicorn Border-Guard muttered darkly, shooting a look where the fat Peach Seed was futilely attempting to calm down Brass Stars and the leader of the Fourth Circle Magi, who had squared off and looked ready to come to blows. “This is going to look like hell on my record.”

“Beg pardon?” Twilight Glimmer and the Magi said together, not following.

“Let’s just say I can make sure that the Queen and a small escort can get to the train station without those two noticing … but it’s going to involve me going with them. I’m about to abandon my post … and that’s going to get me court-martialled.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It took all of Twilight Glimmer’s not-inconsiderably will-power to not stare at the terrible Queen of the Changelings. Even more gaunt than the pictures taken at the wedding of Princess Cadenza and Royal Consort Shining Armor, with several of the strange holes in her limbs having expanded to the point where the very structural stability of her limbs was at risk and her wings fractured and broken beyond any hope of flight, it was her horn, and the deep, jagged cracks running through it that made Glimmer’s heart wince with, of all things, sympathy for the Changeling.

This was hardly the bogeyman the newspapers had scared Ponies with for months, nor the immortal monster that Command had feared they faced. This was a wretch, a starving, dying mother throwing herself at the hooves of her enemies. Or at least, Glimmer prayed this was the case, and the Changeling Queen’s pride really had been crushed to the point where she would parley in this condition.

The rest of the Changelings, including those adorable foals, were likewise meek and subdued, bundling their Queen into the wagon and then herding the strange cat-like creatures after her, but not before stockpiling small orbs of pink, orange and green fluids they claimed were food, medicine and building supplies, in that order into the battered cargo-wagon they had salvaged from somewhere across the border. Indeed, their every action bespoke of weariness, and judging from how they flinched at the on-going verbal smack-down between Brass Stars and ‘Bitter He-Mule’, fear.

“My boy, I am ordering you to go with the Changelings, in-front of all these fine witnesses no less. There, you’re out of hot water.” Peach Seed was saying to Dappled as the young Border-Guard moped by the side of the Changeling Queen’s ‘escort’ wagon. “Your talent has served the Border Guard well, and you’ll also be useful escorting the Queen to the train and away from any prying eyes outside of the convoy. More-over, the Queen is insisting on your presence, probably because she’s hoping to use you as a meat-shield against my darling puddin’.”

“With all due respect, sir, I think I’m more afraid of your wife than a dishonourable discharge, or whatever machinations the Changelings might have in store for me.” Dappled moaned, leaning heavily against the wheel of the cloth-walled wagon. “I swear if she asks me why I haven’t settled down and have a family, or pulls out pictures of her grand-daughters and asks if I’d like to meet them, I’m going to talk the Changelings into escaping back across the border and taking me with them. I swear Candy Apple must have read the same book as my mother …”

“Dappled m’boy, my sweet little Candy wrote that book, I can assure you of that. Now harden the buck up, stand up straight and do the Border Guard proud, because I for one am sick and Faust-damned tired of being looked down by those pampered pansies in the Royal Guard. So you get your plot in gear, you do that voodoo that you do so well, and you show them how the Border Guard gets things done, you understand me, soldier?”

“Sir!” The strangely unimportant Unicorn all but jumped into a stance and saluted, and it was all Glimmer could do not to snicker at how easily the older Stallion had gotten his subordinate all fired up.

Ah, if only you were still here, Major Stonehoof, you’d probably be bursting with pride to see these two. Glimmer couldn’t help but think sadly but fondly of the retired soldier who had led the Garrison before the ravages of old-age had forced the stern warhorse to retire and be replaced with the brash, arrogant Brass Stars.

“Well, Captain Glimmer, let’s get this show on the road before our esteemed leaders start brawling in the dust.” The young Magi who had been orchestrating the enchanting of the Queen’s new ‘carriage’ said with a tired smile on his face, the bulk of the Border Guards and Fourth-Circle Magi gathering around the Queen’s wagon and the other Changelings as Guard Dappled, sweating profusely, cast a spell that appeared much like a ripple of distortion in the air, a bubble that swept over the Ponies and Changelings like a shimmer of half-seen light.

As it passed over her, Glimmer instinctively tried to grasp the spell, to try to understand the working, only to be filled with such an overwhelming feeling of contempt and dismissal as her mind ‘touched’ the magic that she almost walked away, and she wasn’t the only Pony to take a step or two away, blink or shake their heads in surprise at the strange feeling.

Strangely enough, the Changelings remained untouched, and watched the Ponies with what Glimmer could only think was bemusement.

Emotion magic? A BORDER GUARD can use emotion magic? Glimmer screamed inside her head as the unlikely convoy slowly trundled forwards, the eyes of Ponies and Changelings alike glued to the screaming-match going on between the sour-faced Greysmoke who was supposedly in-charge of the Fourth-Circle Magi and Brass Stars, whose eyes strayed over them, then went glassy for a second before the two Stallions refocused on each other and started shouting insults at each other again.

“Forgive me, Sir Magi, but am I correct in assuming this is …” Glimmer whispered once the convoy had gotten a suitable distance away from the two arguing commanders.

“Emotion magic? Yes, you noticed it too, didn’t you. Not surprising, given you’re a Twilight, but it is rather alarming to see such a strong and dangerous talent out here.” The young Magi whispered back, his features taunt with nervousness. “I think our young Border-Guard might find himself reassigned sooner rather than later. To think we have an empath of this level wasting his talents acting as a mere sentry on the border!”

“Could he be a Royal Agent?” Glimmer whispered after several moments of quiet thought. “I mean, that’s a very rare and potent talent he has there …”

“Maybe, but if that is the case, why didn’t he reveal his Regalia and countermand Brass Stars and Flint? Why go through all this rigmarole just to get the Changeling Queen out of here when he would have the authority to give those two their marching orders, damn their personalities?”

“I suppose we’ll find out when we get back to Canterlot, I guess.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Really?” Night Light sighed, staring at the crates that Thunderwing had ‘procured’ to transport the items from the Canterlot Armory. Crates with a very large, vibrantly pink pair of overlapping hearts pierced by a rather … scandalous object … on them. “You picked crates that have the symbol for Equestria’s most infamous sex-toy producer as the method to smuggle the goods into my house?”

“Considering what your wife does for a living? Sounds like a solid cover-story to me.” Spud pointed out, the burly, scarred Stallion awkwardly carrying one of the crates in through the front door, while two of the other Stallions had to carry a crate between them.

“And I am hardly gossip-magazine material, Night Light. Civilian life has made you far too sensitive!” Thunderwing added, grinning wickedly at him as two very tired-looking Stallions who had pulled the wagon all the way from Canterlot Castle trudged their way out the gates, leaving the wagon behind.

“Maybe not, Thunder, but consider that this house is under constant surveillance by the paparazzi at least, let alone the Shadow Court now that things are moving along as they are! Couldn’t we have picked something less obvious than a hire-cart loaded with what appears to be novelty ‘adult’ toys? To the paparazzi, this has to be a scoop just waiting for them to make a mountain out of. I mean, think about it! Suddenly, you all move in, we’re being watched by the sharpest eyes of Canterlot’s gossip-hounds and Thunderwing rolls up with crates marked with the logo of Beating Hearts’ Adult Toy Shoppe?” The retired sniper groaned and put a hoof to his face, ignoring the bemused and annoyed looks of his companions and Ex-herdmate. “I can see tomorrow’s headlines! General Thunderwing retires to join Herd, Princess Sparkle to gain a dozen new parents! It’ll be an absolute disaster!”

“Would being part of a Herd really be that big of a problem to you, Night?” Thunderwing asked in a short, clipped tone that made Night Light wince. Hardly the best angle to use for his argument, considering at one stage Thunderwing, Twilight Velvet and he had been on the verge of forming a Herd of their own.

“Not to me, Thunderwing, a Herd has never been a problem to me, but consider this, all of you; what our wives and partners inside are going to think about this … and more importantly, what they could do to us …”

Silence held the group in a tight grip for several seconds before a chorus of understanding “oooooh” broke the quiet.

“Errr, better go talk to my lovelies after we get these … ‘toys’ … sorted.” Spud mumbled, the scarred, ugly stallion going considerably paler under his coat as his eyes flicked back to the upper levels of the house, where the remaining ponies were packing away and shifting everything they could lay their hooves on to try and squeeze everyone inside the house comfortably.

“Bollocks. The missus will be right pissed at me if that happens, Night.” Another Stallion muttered, turning green as he looked at the logo on the box with trepidation. “She’s quite conscious about social status, and if she thinks she’s going to get lumped into something scandalous in the public eye, she’ll bolt out of here faster than you can say ‘staying at my mother’s house indefinitely’.’

“Bolt out of here and right into the hooves of Bluebones thugs, or any of the other Noble Houses involved in the Shadow Court.” Night Light pointed out as the remaining stallions started to mutter to each other. “First things first, we get the … toys … inside and prep the house for any uninvited guests. Then … we try to convince our lovely partners not to chew our faces off tomorrow if this goes belly-up. Somebody tried to kill the six mercenaries hired to kidnap me with a spell powerful enough to breach the warding runes on Canterlot Castle’s cells, and that’s not something a novice could pull off.”

“It wasn’t by choice, Night. The boxes, I mean.” Thunderwing muttered as the two of them maneuvered the last of the crates down to the basement, the other Stallions having dropped theirs as soon as possible to rush upstairs to ‘prepare’ their spouses. “Rosebush is strapped for manpower, the Three Generals have stripped Canterlot Castle of all but the bare essential Guards to shore up the borders and secure a … potentially hostile diplomat at the Wastelands Border, and Captain Rosebush refused point-blank to have any official involvement with our little fortification efforts. I had to use something to smuggle the items out of the castle, and those boxes were the only ones I could find that would be the least likely to be inspected by the Royal Guard and have awkward questions asked.”

“Little Rosey has got a good head on her shoulders, but Faust-damn is she far too politically-minded for her own good sometimes.” Night grunted as he wrestled with the crate’s lid, finally prying it off to get a good look at the fully-charged stun-wands packed inside under a layer of blankets. “I’m not angry at you, Thunder, just peeved at the world in general that seems Tartarus-bent on making my life, and that of my family, as complicated and dangerous as possible. You just happened to be the bearer of the last batch of bad news, for which I apologise, I shouldn’t have snapped.”

“Still, you do have to admit, we’re all taking to this quite well. The soldiering, I mean. You ‘retirees’ get your marching orders and you snap back into line like you were waiting for the call.” Thunderwing smiled softly as she took the lid out of Night Light’s hooves and pulled it back over the crate. “Boring civilian life with Velvet not everything you dreamed of?”

“I live with one of the kinkiest Mares in creation who writes dirty novels so scandalous we have to get them printed in another country. My son was the Captain of the Royal Guard, my daughter became the personal student of a God, and now both of them are royalty and one of them has ascended to Godhood in the process.” Night Light replied tartly as the two Ponies moved to the stairwell that would lead them out of the basement. “All of that is far more dangerous for my health, mental or otherwise, than the border-skirmishes we had to deal with the last time the Gryphons decided to flex their muscles. At the very least, the Gryphons would just kill me.”

“You really don’t regret leaving the army, do you?” Thunderwing’s voice became small and sad in a way that made needles of pain worm their way into Night Light’s heart.

What you’re really saying is that you think I don’t regret leaving the army, leaving you, to be with Velvet.

“I have enough regrets for a dozen lifetimes, Thunder, with growing older and having foals with only one of my two special Mares being very damn high up that list. Leaving the army while I still had all my limbs attached, however, is not something I regret. The ‘Champagne’ unit was doing more damage to the rest of the Border Guards’ morale than the Gryphon rebels were doing to their bodies, and damn Bluebone was egging them on while using his family connections to keep them shielded from proper punishment. Sooner or later, if I had stayed with our unit and Bluebone had remained focused on punishing me, we would have been ordered into a situation where no matter how well trained we were or how hard our unit fought, we would have been overwhelmed by the Gryphons.”

“Someday, we are going to have to get Bluebone for what he did to us at the border, aren’t we?” The Thestral whispered softly, her face an unreadable mask, as she followed Night Light up the stairwell.

“If Faust has any mercy for us Ponies, he’ll get his soon enough, Thunder, and every sorry, horrid thing he’s done, as a soldier, as a civilian, will come back to bite him on the plot very, very hard.” The dark-blue Unicorn turned and gave his Ex a wicked grin. “And if he comes after us … well … ‘self defence’ is a legally watertight excuse for us to use if things come to that.”

“Princess Celestia said we were not allowed to go that far.” The Commander of the Lunar Guard warned, to which Night Light scowled.

“And Princess Celestia sends my little girl off into ungodly amounts of danger at the drop of a hat, and Bluebone has been after her for years for this sham marriage to his son, trying to ruin Twilight’s life for his own political mileage.” Night Light pointed out as they reached the doorway. “I don’t care if it upsets the Princess’s political schemes or causes a disaster in the Court, if I get the chance to take Bluebone out of the picture, I’ll do it. I will not let my family get any more tangled up in Celestia’s political ploys than they already are, no matter the cost, and no matter who is standing in my way.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sweetie, are you sure you took the order right?” Mrs Cake asked again, trying her best to take a tone that wouldn’t further irritate her already-frazzled husband’s nerves. “I mean, ginseng and guarana in a triple-layer …”

“I know, dumpling, but Miss Rarity was very … firm … that the cake was to have enough kick to it to keep a Pony awake all night long.” Her gangly husband muttered, picking up the mixing-bowl awkwardly between his teeth and carrying it over to the next bench in the kitchen, where the ingredients that would hopefully combine to make a sweet confectionary were all laid out, along with the new ingredients that were causing the Cakes so much stress. “Dumpling, you follow the magazines, is this one of those ridiculous trends coming out of Canterlot? The stimulants are just going to make the cake taste something awful …”

“Miss Rarity, you say. Tell me exactly what she said to you, sweetie, she could be trying to be discreet …” The short and ‘cherubic’ female half of the famous pair of bakers urged her husband, who sagged and recalled the instructions for a triple-layer chocolate cake, fresh whipped cream, glazed cherries, caramel sauce, three times the normal amount of sugar and, with a shudder, he repeated the dreaded line …

“…whatever will give the Ponies who eat it enough stamina to stay awake all night…” Carrot Cake stuttered, blushing fiercly around his freckles. “And she apparently wants it sent to Sweet Apple Acres …”

“Oh sweetie … she’s just being shy about a rendevous!” Cup Cake giggled, giving her frazzled husband a playful shove. “She must have met a gallant Royal Guard during today’s misadventures, and is looking to, ah, ‘repay’ him?”

“I don’t know, dumpling …”

“Oh pish-posh, Rarity and I gossip all the time! Tell me, was she smiling to herself and sounding so very pleased with something?” The portly Mare asked, mentally congratulating her friend in advance for a night of passion with one of those robust Stallions, then chiding herself as her attention turned back to the awkward but sweet and devoted Stallion who had won her heart so many years ago.

“Well, yes, but dumpling …”

“Sweetie, Rarity is the type of Mare who likes to put layers of meanings to things, like this cake of hers. No doubt she didn’t want to ask for something so crass as an aphrodisiac, so she’s trying to help the poor Stallion, eh-hem, rise to the occasion with a special treat.” The cherubic Mare gently began nudging her husband away from the table. “You leave this monstrosity of a cake to me, I’ll duck upstairs, grab some of our special … ‘candies’ … and mix them into the cake, and we’ll leave these nasty ‘stimulants’ out of the mix. Rarity and her special somepony won’t get a wink of sleep tonight, and they’ll never know it wasn’t all them.”

“Is this why you insisted I help you taste-test all those muffins before we had the twins, dumpling?” Carrot asked with a tired smile as he finally took the hint and stepped back to let his wife tackle the task.

“Oh please sweetie, you know you’ve never needed anything other than some whipped cream and a wooden spoon to get my oven ready for some baking.” Cup Cake teased, giggling like a Filly as her husband hooked a fore-leg over her shoulders, pulling her close and kissing her softly on the forehead. “Now skedaddle already, we’ve got customers out there, and Lyra might be happy to lend a hoof with Pinkie missing, but she wouldn’t know a red-velvet cupcake from a custard eclair!”

“Alright, alright, I can take a hint!” Carrot chuckled as his cherubic wife chased him out of the kitchen, obviously in much better spirits, leaving Cup alone to work her ‘magic’ as she trotted back to the mixing table, face split into a blushing grin.

“Oooooh, miss Rarity, I want all the juicy details at our next social!” The portly Mare giggled to herself as she began preparing the ingredients for combining, her hoof reaching towards a large pill-box full of the aphrodisiacs she used to help her over-worked husband rise to the occasion on demand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Whazzat?” Scootaloo muttered, head hanging down in defeat at their latest attempt to get a Cutie Mark had been derailed by Apple Bloom’s stubborn older sister. The box the older Mare carried on her back looked important, considering how Applejack insisted on carrying it herself and refused to allow any of the Crusaders from even touching it. “What d’you think is in that box?”

“The Elements of Harmony?”

“A solid gold apple?”

“Nah, maybe it’s a new rifle for dealing with the bats and Timer-Wolves?”

“Nuh-uh, it’s gotta be the Elements!”

“I say it’s gotta be something expensive! I can feel a lot of magic coming from that box!”

“Maybe it’s something for Rainbow Dash? Like a signed Wonderbolts poster?!”

“A’right, tha’s enough!” Applejack turned to look over her shoulder at the three squabbling Fillies, shooting them a glare that immediately silenced their ‘spirited debate’. “Jus' so we don't have none of your shenanigans tonight, this here’s a scroll from Twilight that ah’ll be lookin’ after for a few days. An’ there ain’t none of your tomfoolery to be involved with it, clear? It’s dangerous, like, ah’ll tan your hides fer days dangerous, y’hear me? Y’know what it is now, stay away from it, or else.”

“But …” The three Fillies said at once, only to flinch backward a step as Applejack’s glare turned from ‘frustrated’ to ‘volcanic’.

“Ah’ll have a Pinkie Promise from all three of y’all that you won’t tell a soul ‘bout this scroll, y’hear? We’re holdin’ it at Apple Acres for a few days till Twilight can figure somethin’ out ‘cause nopony would think to look for a spell-scroll on a farm, but it’s dangerous, an’ if y’all can’t keep your hooves to yourself …”

“But sis, we wouldn’t …” Apple Bloom spluttered indignantly before going mute under the weight of her sister’s frustration.

“Wouldn’t do whatever it takes to get your Cutie Marks? Wouldn’t pull any number o’ dumb stunts that put grey hairs in everypony’s manes when we hear ‘bout them after the fact tryin’ to force what’s supposed to come all natural like? Y’all can Pinkie Promise me that ya’ll won’t get each other all worked up to the point not a lick o’ common sense’ll be shared between the three of you if’n y’all think something might magically gift you with your Cutie Marks?” The older Farm-Pony said in a low, firm voice that made all three Fillies flush with shame and look down at the ground in embarrassment, mumbling the words to the famous ‘Pinkie Promise’ as Applejack’s glare bored holes into their heads. “Maybe you ain’t been paying attention to what happened in Ponyville today, but things have got a lot more dangerous, an' weird, than ahm comfortable with, an’ ah won’t be havin’ you three mixed up in it. Y’all are hazardous enough for Ponyville’s health as thing stand.”

Chastized and more than a little ashamed, the three Fillies followed the Farm-Pony back to the Apple homestead in silence, unable to look at Applejack in embarrassment, especially Apple Bloom, whose face burned with resentment and shame at being spoken to like that in-front of her friends.

It’s so easy for you, Applejack, you’ve already got your Cutie Mark! The young farm-filly fumed in her mind, scowling at her sister’s swaying tail and the box that bobbed back and forth on the elder Apple’s back. We’re almost thirteen, and we’re still Blank Flanks! D’you understand how bad that makes us feel, to be the only Ponies our age without a Cutie Mark? ‘Course we’re gonna do stupid things so we can find out what we’re supposed to do with our lives! I’m tired of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon always mockin’ us and tellin’ the other Ponies we’re no-good ‘cause we ain’t got Cutie Marks at our age! Y’just don’t understand!

And thus were planted the seeds of a rebellion that would come to haunt Ponyville for years to come …

Chapter 36

CHAPTER 36

“Hello, welcome to Sugar Cube … oh. Rainbow Dash!” Lyra waved frantically at the cyan Pegasi, who had to work her way through a throng of Ponies whom had come to the famous bakery for comfort-food and gossip, apparently in equal measure. “Can you do me a favour? I’ve got a delivery for Apple Acres, but there’s no way I can leave the counter when we’re this busy!”

“Oh yeah? That’s the cake for Applejack, right?” Rainbow half-asked, half-shouted as she finally managed to make it to the counter, ignoring the hot glares coming from the table where Carrot Top and several other sour-faced Ponies had seated themselves. “Rarity said something about that, a thank-you gift to Applejack for looking after the Cutiemark Crusaders tonight.”

“Oh man, really? Poor mare.” Lyra chuckled, awkwardly pulling the box containing the cake out from under the counter and flipping the lid open to inspect it. “Whooo, when Rarity pays you back, she pays you back. Lookit this thing!”

“Mmmm, maybe I can convince the Apples to let me stay for dinner …” Rainbow Dash agreed, hoping she wasn’t drooling as she looked at the delicious monstrosity of a cake before her. “Looks like the Cakes have outdone themselves again … uh … who’s paying for it?”

“Aaaah … according to the order, it’s added to Rarity’s tab.” Lyra said after a few moments of inspecting the cake-box. “Tell me what it tastes like, apparently there’s some real freaky ingredients in there, was giving Mr Cake all kinds of nightmares until Mrs Cake came in and took over.”

“Huh, really? Well, they’ve yet to deliver a dud, I can’t see either of the Cakes starting now.” Rainbow said after a few moments of thought, awkwardly picking up the box and half-flapping, half-walking to the door. “Tell the Cakes thanks in advance! This cake looks amazing!”

“Will do!” Lyra grinned and waved as the cyan Pegasus finally made it out into the street and took off into the air.

Unfortunately, Lyra would neglect to pass on the information until much, much later …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It has been far too long since I last did something like this!” Luna said giddily, wielding the hammer and nails with gleeful enthusiasm that would have made Pinkie Pie proud as the two Alicorns set about trying to put the bathroom window back into place, having used their magic to coax the pile of splintered wood from the still-unexplained incident with Trixie, Rainbow Dash and Applejack back together and into the hole in the wall, but were still left with a large hole that the old window-frame was far too small to fit.

Thus they were attempting to build a new window, a larger, rectangular window, having expanded the ‘hole’ to the required dimensions and having borrowed some building materials from the basement to make the new frame.

“Really? You mean you and Celestia used to do things like this?” Twilight asked, bemused by her lover’s attitude as the dark-blue alicorn eagerly set to putting the frame together.

“Yes really! We were far more proactive in our Ponies’ lives before they insisted on building us that horribly overwrought castle! And long before the Three Tribes came to Equestria, Celley and I lived together! Did you think we just laid down in the meadows to sleep, without a roof over our heads?” The Lunar Princess replied tartly, poking out her tongue at Twilight as the younger Mare spluttered an apology. “We lived in a small cottage we’d built with our own hooves, on a hill not too far from where … Neighyork is, actually. It was … pleasant, living with somebody who was so patient with me, teaching me how to come to terms with what …”

Twilight winced as she saw Luna’s bright, happy mood vanish behind a sombre mask as the other mare said “… with what I had become. How to wield the powers of the Moon that I had become linked to during my year-long Ascension, and how to make peace with my immortality, and the short lives of the other creatures whose world I shared.”

“I’m …sorry, Luna, I didn’t mean to bring up bad memories.” Twilight mumbled, awkwardly shuffling over to wrap a wing, never one of her most dexterous appendages, over Luna’s back and then hesitantly nuzzled the side of Luna’s neck when her first gesture of affection wasn’t shaken off. “It’s just I … I’m at a loss. History is something of an obsession of mine, yet I’ve never even heard of ‘Innate Magic’ applied to Earth Ponies or Pegasi before, and the Bloody Horn Rebellion sounds important, but for the life of me, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of it!”

“I … cannot tell you everything, Twilight. My sister explained why she felt she had to erase or alter some parts of the nation’s history when I questioned several … inconsistencies during my convalescence in Canterlot, but even I am not aware of all her alterations to the records.” Luna sighed and leaned into Twilight’s embrace, reciprocating the wing-embrace. “And I am concerned that if I tell you what I know, you may come to falsely believe Celestia has done all of this for malicious purposes. While she is frustratingly … I don’t think Equestrian has the words to accurately describe how aggravating my sister’s manipulations can be when she hasn’t, or won’t, informed you on what their ultimate purpose is, but in all the millennia I have know her and called her my sister, I have never known Celestia to ever seek power for her own sake, or simply for the sake of power. Every action, every plan, every move has always been to end the fighting and bring peace and prosperity to as many lives as possible.”

“What I think I can tell you, without derailing whatever plan Celestia has in the works, is the story of the Bloody Horn Rebellion, and given how it is also the source of at least half of the problem with your new ‘house-guest’, I suspect Celestia will not mind my telling it to you.”

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Somewhere towards the beginning of the second millennium of Celestia’s life, your people, the Three Tribes, came down over the Dragonspine Mountains that cut the northlands in two. It was … a terrible time. The Tribes fought each other viciously, wielding their Innate Magics with cruelty against each other and against any other people that was unfortunate enough to get caught in their path, and in their wake brought the magical plague known as the Windigos.

In their unending fury and spite, the Tribes ruined every fertile field they came across, razed the forests with their skirmishes and fouled every source of water with the dead from their constant running battles, and what little that could sustain life was soon locked in unnatural ice by the Windigos, forcing the Tribes, and the native species of the land, to migrate ever south.

I … will not go into depth about how Celestia and I helped the Tribes stop the fighting right now, that story alone would keep us talking for several hours at least and the charming little story you have about Clover the Clever, Smart Cookie and Private Pansy is just that, a story, but the path to peace was not easy, and it took several centuries before the final barriers of hatred and jealousy between the Tribes was finally broken.

That was the creation of the Succuponies, wasn’t it? You said their curse on our species forced the survivors to sire mostly female offspring.

Yes, but that was the straw that broke the camel’s back, if you’ll pardon such an old and racist saying. By the time the Coven had come into power and turned themselves and their followers into the demon-kind we call Succuponies, all but the most isolationist and hostile communities allowed inter-Tribe marriages and Herds, if not celebrated them as … as representations of my Sister and I.

Huh-whu?

While I am Thestral, or ‘Bat-Ponies’ if you prefer, I manifested my horn during my Ascension, but before that time I had been born with feathered wings, considered an ill-omen at the time by my people. But to the Tribes, both Celestia and I were considered Gods, and the fact that we embodied traits of all three ‘races’, they also considered our message of peace and tolerance a divine message too. And the Ponies irritatingly refused to acknowledge my poor Thestrals as equals to the point Celestia and I spent a great deal of time and effort stopping the bigots from rumor-mongering that Thestrals were brutal cannibals or blood-sucking demons!

Wait, you were born with feathered wings? What? Go back, I want to know about …

My history, and the ancient ways of the Thestrals, would take even longer to explain that the Bloody Horn Rebellion! Do not be greedy, Twilight, you will pry all my secrets out of me eventually! Although I shall require many sacrifices of cookies and belly-rubs first

… Just the belly? Not a little bit lowe~

BE-HAVE! Now, where was I? Oh, yes, the Bloody Horn Rebellion. Hmmm. Well, suffice to say, close to the end of her third millennium, which by the current calendar would have marked nearly seven hundreds years since Equestria was founded, Celestia found herself dealing with the unwanted worship of a nation. I was, I’m sorry to say, jealous of the adoration and slavish worship of my sister, given that as the ‘Goddess of the Moon’, I was considered the protector of dreams and the ‘bedroom arts’ at best, at worst a monster that Celestia kept chained and close to her to protect ‘her children’. A jealousy that helped create cracks in my mind that the Nightmare Spirit was able to use to invade and infect me centuries later.

The worship of Celestia had reached such a level that one of the largest and most influential cults on the continent, the Sisterhood of Celestia, were attempting to go to war with each other, because some claimed she had been born an Earth Pony, or a Pegasi, or a Unicorn, and thus belonged first to their Tribe and favoured them most of all. Despite the fact that Celestia spent a great deal of time trying to explain she was most certainly not descended from any of the Three Tribes and was most certainly not a ‘God’ in any way, shape or form, the various factions of the Sisterhood of Celestia were on the verge of undoing hundreds of years of peace and progress with their rabble-rousing and politicking. I can still recall the disaster where three armies of Ponies, under the command of the most militant groups within the Sisterhood met in the meadows of the mountains of Canterlot to finally have it out when Celestia and I showed up to put a stop to their folly once and for all...

Remember, Twilight, back in those days that Alicorns were considered living divinities to the point where either my sister or I simply flying over a Pony was considered a blessing or an omen that they were destined for greatness if our shadow touched them. So when we showed up in a thunderous display of magic meant to cow the idiots before they started fighting, it instead had the opposite effect. The Priestesses went mad in ecstasy at being ‘visited’ by the Goddess and her … ‘Sister’, and screamed at their followers to hop to it, the chosen race would annihilate the ‘heretics’ in full view of their ‘Goddess’.

Auuuungh …

Hmm, you really are my sister’s favourite student, for that is the exact same noise she makes in private when exposed to the mindless stupidity of the Ponies she rules over. Needless to say, it took my sister and I several seconds to realize our plan to stun the Ponies using a grandiose display to take advantage of their … foolishness … had backfired in the worst possible way, and Celestia panicked as she saw thousands of Ponies charging each other with the intent to kill one another.

My poor sister. All those centuries herding Ponies towards civilized behaviour and trying to erase the brutish cultural norms that their long exile and constant blood-feuds had etched into their social structures, and then they end up using her as the reason, the excuse, to go back to those old ways … well, let’s just say that while Celestia tends to be one of the most placid and pacifistic of the Immortals, if my sister loses her composure she has the potential to be one of the most effective, and hilarious, forces of destruction the world has ever know once her control slips. She landed smack-dab in the middle of the charging armies with such force she caused the very earth to ripple outwards, which knocked the Earth Ponies and Unicorns off their hooves, and the pressure-wave from her rapid descent and impact sent the Pegasi tumbling down to the ground.

With thousands of Ponies lying prostrate before her, the self-proclaimed ‘Priestesses’ staring at her in rapture and the power of the Sun radiating from her like a golden aura that bathed the land and sky in molten gold, my sister looked upon her Ponies and said …

…What? WHAT? You can’t keep me waiting!

It’s just … it’s a little …

TELL MEEEEEEEEEEE!

“WHAT THE BUCKING BUCK DO YOU ALL THINK YOU’RE BUCKING DOING?”

… Celestia swore? That’s … impossible. Blasphemous even, if you’ll pardon the irony, Luna. The one time I swore she marched me down to the Royal Baths and scrubbed my mouth out with soap, in full view of several maid-Ponies, and gave me the longest lecture of my life about Mares and having a civilized tongue in my head.

Truly? Dare I ask what you said?

I’d … rather not say. Just thinking about the words still makes me remember the taste of soap …

Humph, spoilsport. Still, in all the millennia I have known my sister, I have seen her lose her temper in such a manner only a small number of times, and you must remember Twilight, that while I may have the occasional lapse into accidentally using the Royal Canterlot Voice, Celestia is the one who taught me, and as you know, her power is … extremely potent, especially considering she is the physical aspect of the Sun. Without the proper foci and the right emotional control, it is very difficult for Celestia to wield all of her power without causing immeasurable harm to the planet.

So when stressed beyond belief and outraged at the arrogance and insufferable ego of the Sisterhood attempting to use her name as the instrument to goad her Ponies back into their blood-feuds, Celestia may have used more power than she intended. The very force of her words picked up the closest Ponies to her and threw them back through the air by several yards, at least, if I recall correctly, and rolled those further back along the ground like the Neighponese roll their sushi. Needless to say, the bulk of the Three Armies were ‘stunned’ in every sense of the word and were thus very, ah, receptive to Celestia’s less-than-diplomatic rant about how idiotic they were and how pointless their dispute was, because she valued every Pony, regardless of Tribe, equally and without concern for bloodline or pedigree.

Unfortunately, the more … devoted … members of the Three Armies, and the Sisterhood Priestesses themselves, were utterly devastated at being humiliated so and insisted they had to leave Equestria to ‘atone’ for what they had done even after Celestia forced them to take tea with herself and had me witness their reluctant agreement to a pact of non-aggression. And they sought to take only Ponies of their Tribes with them, and though my sister and I tried desperately to stop them spreading their poison further, we could not curb their efforts entirely. A sizeable chunk of Equestria’s population who could not believe that Celestia would not favour their Tribe above all others followed these errant Priestesses, and helped found independent nations comprised entirely of their own Tribe.

Thus, the Earth Pony ‘Sisterhood’ went to the north and the east, eventually creating their own nation of Stalliongrad. The Pegasi ‘Sisterhood’ flew over the ocean to the south, bumped into the natives of Down-Unda and fled to the a nearby chain of islands after being forced to attend the endless feasts called ‘Barh-bhees’ the locals constantly hold, and haven’t come down from their volcanic homes since. And the Unicorn faction of the ‘Sisterhood’ went to the far, far eash, eventually forming several unique nations of their own that have risen and fallen, merged and been shattered by civil war, and one of the oldest and most storied of those nations is …

Neighpone? Are you telling me that country was founded by religious exiles? How does this help with Trixie’s, uh, condition?

I think you might be shocked to know most countries that exist now are founded by exiles from oher nations that have long been lost to the dust of history, dear Twilight. Their version of the story is that the Sun-Goddess, perhaps the most venerated Deity in their pantheon, tasked them with finding perfection and what they call ‘The True Path’. Honestly, I would not hesitate to say they are one of the most advanced and beautiful cultures I have ever encountered, if only their … dislike of the other Tribes were not so advanced. Ponies who are not born Unicorn in Neighpone were not very well treated, to the point Celestia actively had to lean on them to stop some of their Empresses forcing their people to abort and smothering non-Unicorn children and instead foster them out to other lands.

That’s ….

Horrific? Believe me, dear Twilight, I have seen atrocitries and acts of cruelty that have sickened me to my core perpetuated by all three Tribes, and many nations and races, over my long, long life, so I can assure you the Neighponese are not alone in having a dark and bloody history, nor are they amongst the worst. It is why that despite all her subterfuge and irritatingly high-hoofed ideology, I still stand with my Sister’s methods, because without her and her machinations to try and help all living things embrace the tenets of Harmony, I can honestly say we’d still be in an era where might made right and mob-rule was the law.

So, the Bloody Horn Rebellion was about the Three Tribes going to war over who they thought Celestia loved more? That’s … insane! Completely illogical!

You say that because you were born in an era of peace, plenty and great knowledge, Twilight, and such thinking is foreign to you. In those days, while many races had a strong grasp of magic and used it to great effect to expand their territories and crush their enemies, magical advances outside of warfare were few and far between and considered unnecessary by the leaders of that era. And in truth, the Rebellion started long before then when Sisterhood Priestesses of the Earth and Pegasi factions started cutting the horns off their Unicorn rivals as punishment for their ‘blasphemies’. The retaliations were just as bloody and gruesome, but those first acts were what cemented the name, at least to Celestia and myself.

So how does that help us understand Trixie and her little friend? Or her partial transformation?

Part of the problem we will likely face, Twilight, is that the Ponies of Neighpone, Stalliongrad and the Maredrid Isles are isolated and tend to either kill or ostracize Ponies outside of the dominant Tribe despite all of Celestia’s efforts, which while horrific, has also ‘purified’ their bloodlines for the most part, meaning they are closer to the ‘old’ bloodlines of the original Three Tribes. It could be that the mingling of the Tribes and the dilution of their unique traits into the harmonious whole we have today also weakened any resistance to the demonic taint that now affects Trixie.

In short, I fear that to truly understand her resistance to the transformation process, we may need to seek out a purebred, or nearly so, Neighponese Pony to reach a proper comparison. And as wonderfully accepting and open as Ponyville is, I have noticed a distinct lack of Neighponese Ponies here.

And you were saying that the current Empress has … designs on me?

You are the student of their most venerated 'God', Celestia herself, and you display their most valued traits, a vast source of personal magic and a connection to one of the ancient Noble Bloodlines that survived the trek over the Dragonspine Mountains. You are her personal student no less, and the only one who has also Ascended to Immortality. Believe me when I say that the letters requesting you visit their nation went from politely eager to almost forceful upon your recovering the Elements of Harmony, and Celestia turned pink upon reading the first letter from the Neighponese Empress upon your Ascension, Twilight, and refused to allow anypony, even myself, to read it afterwards. To have you owe her a favour would be dangerous, dear Twilight, especially if the Empress insists on repayment and threatens diplomatic consequences if you fail to repay it. And given your status as the paragon of Harmony and Friendship? It would be a disaster.

And yet, if we cannot find a Neighponese Pony in Equestria who might be discreet enough for our purposes and share the same … attribute … as Trixied to use as a comparison for your tests, we may need to seek out the Neighponese Embassy for aid, and that will likely have far-reaching implications, especially given the current Empress’s obsessive focus on your status, and now your Immortality. Any expression of interest in the particulars of this mess, even if we state clearly that it is to help a Pony in dire straights, could be turned into a diplomatic mess if the Empress desires a … closer … relationship with the newest Princess.

… Why is everypony after my plot? Before I got these wings and became a Princess, nobody ever said boo about wanting to date me or … or any of the other stuff!

I think that it is more that you were blissfully oblivious, judging from what your friends have told me. For which I am profoundly grateful, if I may be so bold.

Oh, now who has to behave?

You, because I think Spike has been listening on the other side of the door for the past few minutes.

Whu-what?

Ah … hey? Do I need to fetch you two a coathanger?

SPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!

Chapter 37

CHAPTER 37

“Look, little one. Look how fast we’re going.” Chrysalis murmured softly, holding the little white-coated male up to the window, where it pressed both tiny hooves against the glass window of the train, eyes and mouth wide open in wonder as the borderlands, pockets of brown and dull grey-green plantlife dotting the stark, harsh landscape of burnt reds and yellows of towers of wind-carved stone and sand, slowly gave way to the lusher, rounder, greener landscape that would only continue to grow ever more vivid and beautiful the closer they came to Canterlot.

It struck Dappled as a very motherly thing to do, even as a part of him couldn’t help by cynically wonder if it was just merely another act that the Changeling Queen was performing to try and help convince the Ponies to help her without resorting to her emotion-warping magic.

Which may or may not have been detectable. Which may or may not have made her head explode inside the heavily-warded confines of the carriage. Were her infamous powers of deception and subterfuge purely magical in nature or was the Changeling Queen also a master of acting that used those powers to augment her natural talent?

Such thoughts were quickly put aside as one of the two black-coated females that had been put into his care while Chrysalis had dealt with the white foal’s needs suddenly decided that now would be a good time to climb Mount Dappled with some very unco-ordinated hooves and a great deal of determination, and Scout, who had seemingly attached herself to his flank, was of absolutely no help, being similarly challenged by her charge, who had apparently decided that Scout’s ears made very delicious chew-toys.

Despite repeated attempts to coax her to snuggle, or sleep, or do anything other than shove her tiny hooves into his hide for traction, Dappled was unable to stop the baby Changeling from it’s determined climb and instead resolved to keep a hoof beneath her at all times as the tiny, black-coated filly climbed up his torso and neck and joined her twin sister in gnawing on the nearest ear with great affection, leaving both Dappled Light and Scout wincing as the twins worked out their teething issues.

“Hmph. You’ll make a good father someday, Dappled.” A low, soft voice rumbled from the doorway, and all six beings in the comparment jumped at once, although for different reasons.

For Chrysalis and Scout, is was a deep, primal fear of a dominant female presence not of their Hive that triggered instincts of submission and rivalry that warred in their minds.

For Dappled, it was growing fatigue of enduring yet another round of attempts to ‘introduce’ him to Candy Apple’s impressive array of grand-children, great-grand-children and other assorted single female family-members.

For the Foals, it was, irritatingly enough to their mother, delight, for Candy Apple bore in the two bulging pannier-bags she carried an array of old, hand-me-down toys her children had given back to her for the purpose of entertaining the three Changeling Foals.

Unfortunately for Dappled and Scout, the two female Twins refused to let go of their new chew-toys, so they were subject to the twin foals trying to leap off their heads towards ‘aunty Candy’, who still stood outside of their compartment in the carriage’s passageway, with the Pony and Changeling’s ears still firmly gripped in their little mouths.

“I … ah! I appreciate that, ma’am, but gaaaaah I think this is putting me off having fo-hoooah! Foals for life!” Dappled grunted as each attempt by the little filly to get to the toys made his head ring with pain, wondering if his ear was about to detach or not.

“They’re just saying they trust you. You’re ‘safe’, so the little darlings are trying to keep you close to them.” Candy Apple rumbled, pulling out several toys and shoving them into the laps of Dappled and Scout, who quickly found themselves dealing with two hyper-excited foals trying to hug each toy simultaneously, finally relinquishing their holds on the much-abused ear-shaped teething toys. “Now, let’s have a look at you, your majesty.”

“Beg pardon?” Chrysalis asked in a weak tone as her white-coated foal was deftly picked up, giggling all the while, and placed in Dappled’s lap, where he quickly joined one of his sisters in excitedly wrestling with a battered-looking teddy bear.

“I am a registered nurse, and my little snookums mentioned you’re in … dire straights, shall we say?” The big, burly Earth Pony Mare said, shooting a look at the foals. “That your sorry state is as much internal as external? Well, I’m going to take your blood pressure and give you a basic physical exam, see if there’s anything I can do for you now before we hit Canterlot.”

“Should I not wait for …” The Changeling Queen began to protest before falling back into muttering as Candy Apple quickly started poking and prodding the Changeling’s body, paying special attention to her badly fractured limbs and horn. “Gah! That smarts, watch where you put your hooves you … you …”

“I’ve been called worse by better, but mind your words in-front of the foals.” The burly, aging Mare warned as her large hooves began to narrow their search to the Queen’s horn and torso. “Mmmph. I can’t really check much with your carpace in the way, but you’ve definitely got some pretty nasty swelling where, if you were a Pony, the rib-cage ends and the digestive system begins, and if you were a Unicorn, I’d say you’ve got a nasty series of fractures running through your horn and into the skull-bone itself. And I’m betting you’ve been using magic all the time, which would prevent the fractures from fully healing.”

“I … have only been using my magic sparingly. If I use it too much I can … faint. I am finding it difficult to absorb love, meaning I am almost always starving, which is also slowing my regeneration to a crawl.” Chrysalis mumbled hesitantly after a few moments of sullen silence.

“Well when we reach Canterlot, the first thing we’re doing is getting you to a proper hospital for a deep scan to see what’s broken since I can’t tell through your carpace.” Candy Apple grunted, looking displeased. “If you were a Pony, I’d say you’ve got cracked ribs and organs that have been displaced inside your body cavity, but I don’t know the first thing about Changeling bodies, and any treatment you receive would do more harm than good if we don’t know what is ‘normal’ for a Changeling.”

“Now, Dappled, I want you and … Scout? I want you both to take the foals away for a short while and keep them entertained while the patient …”

“I have a name …” The Changeling Queen muttered softly, meeping as Candy Apple turned to give her an annoyed look.

“…the patient tells me all of her symptoms so I can pass them along to the doctors. I’d assume you’d prefer to tell another female, and in private at that, what you may be suffering from. Now scoot, all of you. I'll send somepony to fetch you when I'm done with the patient.”

“Understood, ma’am, we’ll take the foals to the far end of the carriage.” Dappled replied, levitating the teddy bear and the two foals attached to it onto his back, while Scout settled for grabbing her stuffed pony toy and using it as a sling to carry the foal in her care, the two beating a hasty retreat from the room and heading towards the far end of the carriage, the sliding door closing behind them with an ominous click. “Soooo … how does one distract these three little … angels … without getting their ears gnawed off? I forgot to ask your Queen before we …”

“They are entertained now, we simply must ensure they remain safe.” Scout cut in, walking forwards and poking Dapplied in the flank with her horn. “The Queen fed them only recently, so they will likely play until they become tired and go to sleep. We need only hold out until then.”

Dappled’s attempts to make conversation as they travelled were quickly cut short by Scout and her ‘pushy’ attitude involving poking that short, sharp horn of hers into his flank every time he tried to stop and make small-talk. Her attitude puzzled him until the unlucky Border Guard remembered how terrified of his CO’s large-and-in-charge wife the Changelings were, even as it embarrassed him as the Magi in the nearest rooms all looked up in puzzlement or amusement as Dappled was herded up the corridor by the suddenly-bossy Changeling up the narrow confines of the carriage’s passageway towards the final compartment.

Sadly, it was not empty at all, but held the pretty-but-annoyed-looking second-in-command from the border-Garrison, reading a thick book of some kind with a peeved expression on her face.

“Ah, apologies, ma’am, but can we borrow this room for a while? Nurse Candy Apple has exiled us from the Queen’s presence until she has finished her physical examination.” Dappled asked from the doorway, wincing as Scout delivered yet another prod with her horn, a little harder this time.

“What? Oh, yes, yes, certainly, come on in.” The Unicorn muttered absently, turning a page in her book and frowning. “Oh bother, that’s no use either. Maybe this case …”

“Riiiiiight. Well, excuse us then.” The Border-Guard muttered, wondering if everyone on the train was some sort of nut. The Magi seemed to have gone from ignoring his existence, which he was perfectly fine with, to being awkwardly buddy-buddy with him and insisting he ‘stop by’ for a ‘magical examination’, and the Changelings were now treating him like one of their own, which was a disturbing development in its own right and now Scout had started pushing boundaries in a whole new way, as the tingle of his repeatedly-poked flank could attest. “C’mon, you little gnawers, let’s see how long it takes for you to tucker yourselves out.”

Several minutes passed in relative quiet, if not peace, as the three foals alternated between cuddling with their new toys, climbing all over their ‘carers’ and continuing their favourite game of ‘gnaw the ear off’, until Dappled noticed that the other Unicorn was giving him sneaky looks every so often, and Scout’s cheeks appeared to be inflating like miniature balloons every time the other Mare did so.

Does she think that the Captain is going to assassinate me? Dappled though to himself, half-amused at Scout’s over-protective nature, half-concerned that she’d start an incident and derail the entire situation.

“So, uh, ma’am, I never actually got your name?” The Border Guard ventured after finding the atmosphere unbearably awkward, and earning an angry look from Scout in the process for some reason.

“Oh … Twilight Glimmer, Captain … err … probably former 1st Captain at this rate, of the 42nd Garrison.” The frazzled-looking Unicorn said, giving Dappled a awkward smile. “Sorry if I’m not being very sociable, just researching some old cases about leaving commanding officers behind.”

“Wait, you mean that Brass Stars and that old Magi are still …”

“Probably brawling in the dirt as we speak, or have rushed back to the train station and realized we’ve left them behind. Even if I get a commendation for this, my career at the Garrison is over, and if Brass Stars’s family decides to make things difficult, my military career is deader than disco.” The ethereally-pink Unicorn finished, running a hoof through her frazzled indigo mane. “Still, we’re bringing in the Changeling Queen safe and sound, she’s contained and unable to do any more harm and she wants to make peace with the Princesses. All in all, I’d consider that a fair trade for losing my job.”

“Why would your Queen punish you for the failings of another?” Scout piped up, scooting closer to Dappled as she did so, the foal in her lap taking the opportunity to climb up to her chest for some snuggling.

“It’s … difficult to explain. We have a chain of command, and Ponies below other Ponies in that chain of command aren’t supposed to disobey those above them. In theory, those above them are supposed to be better than those below, but there are often Ponies like Brass Stars who got their position due to the authority and power of their families, rather than any innate skill.” Glimmer explain, shooting the Changeling a puzzled look. “Surely you Changelings have similar individuals amongst you?”

“All are connected by the Hive Mind. If one shirks one’s duties, the whole Hive will learn, and the individual will be ousted from both the Hive and the Hive Mind.” The Changeling replied quickly. “Such a fate is a slow, lingering death, thus all Changelings work to the best of their abilities, and all Changelings can draw upon the memories of those who came before, and those who are now, to ensure they can always do their duties effectively.”

“Wait, you share memories?” Dappled asked, a growing sense of horror growing in him that he’d accidentally bukkae’d an individual whose memories could be shared by an entire race.

“That’s … fascinating. That would mean so long as the Hive Mind exists, you’ve no need for books or teachers, you can just access the repository of memories and know how to function …” Glimmer said, a tone of wonder in her voice. “So how do you advance your knowledge if nopony needs to learn on their own, or in new ways? What happens when you run into something you’ve no previous memory of?”

“We absorb new memories.” The Changeling replied bluntly.

For several moments both Ponies looked at the Changeling in bug-eyed shock, then each other, then back to the Changeling before loudly asking “How?” simultaneously.

Scout blinked, her horn flickered green for a moment, and then disturbingly enough, Chrysalis’s voice emerged from the Scout’s mouth.

“Inquisitive, aren’t you. Since that behemoth of a Mare is currently occupied, I will answer in place of my child. Do you know why we cocooned the Ponies in the Canterlot Castle and didn’t just trap them in resin like we did the Guards and civilians outside?” Chrsyalis-through-Scout asked, a smug grin on her face that filled Dappled with mixed feelings about the innocent Changeling bearing such an expression.

“We thought it was to imprison them, and you couldn’t do that to the Ponies already on guard because it would take too long …” Glimmer replied after a few moments of thought.

“Hardly. Even the slowest of my Drones could create a cocoon within minutes, and all they would need to do would be to drop the cocoon onto a Pony, and it would naturally envelop the target.” Chrsyalis-through-Scout scoffed, waving a dismissive hoof at Glimmer, who bristled at the nonchalant arrogance displayed towards her. “When a Changeling enters a cocoon, they are placed into a state of suspended animation and can heal at an accelerated rate. But when we place a non-Changeling inside a cocoon, their minds become an open book to the Hive Mind, imprinting their memories, their impressions, even fragments of their personality. Through cocooning, we Changelings are able to easily absorb all the information we need to successfully infiltrate a society or species, as well as keeping those whom we are replacing in a state of suspended animation, safe from all harm while we achieve our objectives.”

“Fascinating … but why, if the cocoons are so useful for healing, haven’t you placed yourself in one?” Glimmer pointed out, a smug grin of her own flashing as Chrysalis-through-Scout’s arrogant smirk faltered.

“Because doing so might save my life, it would condemn my Hive to a slow, withering death. I am the lych-pin of the Hive Mind, its center, the being that supports the entire structure, the hub that keeps the spokes of the wheel aligned. If I were to withdraw into the healing sleep the cocoon offers, with the level of injuries I have sustained, it could be months or even longer before I emerge, and during that time the Changelings, my children, would have suffered something akin to what you Ponies call ‘dementia’, losing their minds, unable to function effectively, forced to rely upon crudely inefficient words and gestures to communicate their intentions or needs. I would be sacrificing my entire family just to restore myself, and that I could not, will not, do.”

“Whatever else you Ponies might think of me and my kind, know this: Family is as sacred to us as Harmony is to you. No Changeling would ever willing take any action that would purposefully cause harm or suffering to their Hive.” Chrysalis-through-Scout murmured, her horn flickering with green light again. “Oh, and tell those magi that yes, their spell-work does stop me using magic, but it does nothing to prevent the Hive Mind from functioning. Excellent work.”

“Why excellent work?” Glimmer asked desperately, leaning forwards as if to grasp the essence of the Changeling Queen and shake answers from it.

“Because if we could not hear our Queen, we would tear our way through anything that stood between us and her to bask in her glow again.” Scout replied, her voice her own again.

“Well isn’t that just ominous.” Dappled muttered, looking down at the two foals cuddled up to the much-abused teddy-bear in his lap. “I suppose that’s a fair warning that any harm done to Chrysalis will be met in kind.”

Sighing, Glimmer closed the open book in her lap and leaned over towards Dappled, putting a hoof on his knee and smiling at him.

“Maybe. But I want to tell you this, Dappled. You’re a very special Pony, and when we get to Canterlot, I am going to personally see to it that you get promoted to a rank befitting your special talents, by any means necessary. Equestria needs more Stallions like you stepping up for what’s right.”

“Oh! Oh, uhm, no, I just did what I was trained …” Dappled stammered, cursing himself for blushing as a pretty mare praised him, and thus missed the way Scout’s cheeks inflated to two round spheres, or when she took the foal in her lap between her hooves and raised it up to Dappled’s head, where the foal quickly took advantage of her new altitude and chomped down hard on his ear.

Why me?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“D’you think she’s done?”

“Faust, I hope so.”

“I never thought a Pony could build a cannon out of cookie-dough and chocolate fudge! One that worked, anyways!”

“I don’t ever want to play ‘pin the tail on the donkey’ the way she does ever again. Ow, my hips …”

“At least she stopped clinging to the ceiling and singing …”

“I don’t know what I’m going to tell my wife …”

“I don’t know what I’m going to tell my husband!”

“I’m right here, dear. I was involved in most of it, if you recall.”

“Yes, but considering everybody was covered in whipped cream and toppings, I’m not sure who was doing what!”

“This! You see? This is why the file on the Element of Laughter said ‘never tell her you’re upset or that you want a party’! But did any of you listen? Noooo, ‘Hoss, what’s the worst that could happen?’ or ‘Hoss, lighten up and give the Mare her cupcakes.’ Or ‘Hoss, have you seen what this mare can do with a fresh banana, caramel sauce and whipped cream!‘ .”

“WE KNOW! Shut up and help us get her cleaned up so we can send her back to Ponyville!”

“P-p-paaarty?”

“She’s waking up!”

“NOT AGAIN!”

“Celestia, save us!”

“Miss Pie, we cannot have another party, we … we aaah … we still need to clean this kitchen up! So you can leave now, really, it’s okay, you have to go back to Ponyville, right!”

“Oh, you’re right! I gotta get home quickly, I’ve got a ‘welcome to Ponyville even if you’re an utter jerk’ party to plan, plus there’s a hundred bits I need to give to Rainbow Dash anyways!”

“Ye … yeah, okay, I’m not even going to ask.”

“Ah, do you require an escort to the royal baths, miss Pie? You’re somewhat sticky from the whipped cream … and chocolate sauce … and caramel butter …”

“What, no silly! That’s what tongues are for!”

“What are you oh … oh … ooooooh my.”

“What the buuuuuuu…”

“…Well that’s disturbing and oddly arousing …”

“HOW DOES A TONGUE THAT BIG FIT INSIDE YOUR MOUTH?”

“Somebody pass me the cooking sherry, I need to bleach my brain …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well. That was an adventure.” Discord remarked dryly, slipping the dvd back into the case and eyeing the cover with annoyance and a silent prayer for the genitals of the ‘actors’. “When I saw the title, I was expecting something very, very different …”

Celestia, for her part, was still flopped over the arm of the couch, wheezing with laughter, eyes still sparkling with tears and humor. “Oh, I don’t know, Discord. That Jolly Hocksville and his band of idiots certainly know how to take a hit! I didn’t even know we had a troupe of entertainers like that in Equestria, or ones who would be bold enough to perform under such title. Jackasses indeed!”

“And people say my brand of chaos is extreme...” The serpentine Chaos Aspect muttered faintly, slipping the dvd to the bottom of the pile and picking up the next, inspecting the cover with far more care this time. “Hmmm … I’m not certain about this one either. Remind me in the future that, as fun as random choice is, to not just randomly pluck whatever looks flashy from the Castle’s library of movies.”

“We … don’t actually have one of those. Where did you get these videos, exactly?” Picking herself up and sitting down to wait as Discord made a choice between the remaining videos, Celestia found herself at once relieved and nervous. While Discord’s choices had been random and in turns hilarious and horrifiying, the Solar Princess found herself realizing she’d actually been able to forget for a few brief hours the stress and fatigue the day’s events had delivered. A part of her felt guilty at forgetting the suffering of the Ponies around her, while another part felt ... liberated. How long has it been since I actually had any time to myself, without having to wonder how this faction or that nation will respond, if I will spark a war or cause a riot because of a mis-step or words said in haste?

“Hmmmph … oh, there was a wall of shelves filled with movies in the barracks, I assumed it was something you put in to entertain the Guardponies while they were on break.” Discord mumbled, shuffling through the assembled movies with a frown on his face. “Jackasses II:Jackass Harder? Definitely not!”

“Perhaps it was something Shining Armor or Rosebush started …” Celestia offered, levitating a bottle of scotch up and inspecting the level with a critical eye. “Another bottle, Discord? I admit it may be a touch early for it, but we’ve gone through most of this one.”

“I would say yes, but don’t you have some boring Princess-y stuff to do? Won’t the Ponies be miffed if their precious Princess is pickled before sundown?” Swivelling his neck in ways no neck was ever meant to swivel, Discord fixed a yellow eye on Celestia, who rolled her own eyes at Discord in protest.

“I assure you, dear Discord, that it will take more than a few bottles of scotch to see me under the weather. I have actually been prohibited from bar crawling after a … ah … a binge saw me nearly empty the alcohol reserves of several of Canterlot’s bar-strips. Apparently I had nearly emptied the city of spirits before the Guards decoded my message and found me, despite everything that happened that night.”

Discord’s mis-matched eyes grew several sizes larger, and Celestia felt her cheeks flush with embarrassment. She hadn’t actually meant to sound like she was bragging …

“Even my patience for the antics of my little ponies has limits. I had just shot down a particularly egregious set of legislation that was being pushed through parliament that would have caused a great deal of suffering to Earth Ponies and Pegasi through biased taxation, and feeling more than a touch proud of myself, I decided to slip into a form less well known than ‘Princess Celestia’ to enjoy myself with alongside the Ponies I had just helped save from the Shadow Council’s bigotry.”

“Well, one thing led to another, and at the time, upon hearing that their ‘Princess’ had used her veto powers to shoot down the legislation and then lay into the political bloc that had tried to push them through the parliament in terms just short of calling them bigots, let’s just say most of the common-ponies of Canterlot, from all four tribes, had decided to throw an impromptu celebration in her ‘honor’. I had planned on only having a quiet drink and perhaps the chance to talk with my ponies without the pomp and ceremony my true form seems to attract from them, but after the third bar I tried to have a drink at got caught up in the celebration, I gave up and decided to just go along with it all.”

“Somewhere along the way I forgot to reinforce the polymorph spell, and after the … thirtieth or so bottle of … something, I think it was either rum or whiskey, it began to unravel as I got a little bit tipsy. Sometime after that, my memories get a little bit too hazy to recall everything perfectly at that point, but I lost control of the spell and transformed back into my natural form, the Ponies went absolutely berserk that I’d been paying for my own drinks after everything I had done for them and insisted they pay for everything.”

“Oh my Me, I think I see where this is going …” Discord muttered, padding over to sit down next to Celestia, who took the opportunity to rest her head on the serpentine chimera’s narrow shoulder, sighing happily as Discord's lion-paw wrapped itself around her shoulders.

“Yes, well, since every Pony absolutely had to buy me a round, and by the time I managed to escape from that bar, word had gotten around that the Princess had snuck down from the Castle to celebrate with them ... I had set one hoof out the door to get a breath of fresh air, and then the mob grabbed me and carried me over to the next bar, and the next, and the next and … well, by the time the Royal Guards managed to convince the crowd that I really did have to go back and raise the sun right that instant or else the rest of the world would complain very loudly, the records show I not only broke several records on number of consecutive shots in most of the bars and taverns, but with the help of the mob, I’d almost entirely gone through the city’s reserves of scotch, whiskey, bourbon, tequila, vodka and … well, just about any spirit that was bottled.” Now blushing down to the base of her neck, Celestia couldn’t help but chuckle softly. “And let me tell you, the Shadow Council almost got me to abdicate by marching into the throne room and assaulting me by clanging pots and pans together as loudly as they could, which prompted me to use the Royal Canterlot Voice to tell them exactly where they could stuff those pots. I’m not sure who came off worse for wear from that little stunt, the Shadow Council’s dignity or my poor aching head.”

Discord’s mouth opened to say something when a knock came from the door, causing both Immortals to flinch, give each other startled looks and then sigh in unison.

And another moment ruined … Celestia thought glumly, giving Discord’s narrow limb a pat with her wing as she got up and trotted over to the door, where a frazzled-looking Mare wearing the parade-armor of a Royal Guard awaited, with half a dozen Ponies behind her pulling carts loaded with folders and rolled-up scrolls. “Ah, Unflappable, I take it the PR department finally has come up with something?”

“Yes, your majesty.” The personal secretary of the Royal Guard’s Captain replied in a carefully neutral tone, waving a hoof towards the other Ponies who were pulling the carts. “Several versions, in-fact. They are insisting that you pick the one you like … Captain Rosebush is currently overseeing the patrols to protect the Castle while the bulk of our forces have been reassigned elsewhere, and apologises for not being here to go over them with you herself.”

“Considering how stretched our resources are, and the impossibility of preparing a contingency for today’s disasters, she has no need to apologise. Rosebush is, as always, performing her duties above and beyond the call of her station.” Celestia replied, forcing a warm smile to her face and hoping the alcohol on her breath wasn’t noticeable. A quick glance over her shoulder revealed that Discord had either teleported away or turned invisible, so the Princess stepped back to allow the Ponies access, grimacing as closer inspection of the carts revealed that whole acres of trees had probably paid with their lives for these mountains of documents. “So … where do we begin?”

“We, your majesty?” Unflappable asked, her features unreadable as always, while the Ponies who were pulling the carts looked at Celestia with their mouths hanging open. “Surely you will wish to review the speeches yourself, to prevent leakages to the media, and your detractors?”

“Considering that I am fairly certain no-pony here wishes to be held responsible for causing a wide-spread panic, I would appreciate feed-back on the speeches from Ponies who are not emotionally or actively involved in the Succuponi attack on Ponyville, or the Changeling Queen surrendering at our borders.” Celestia replied, smiling broadly as she used her magic to firmly shut the door, and extending a wing to the recently-vacated couch. “Make yourselves comfortable, my little Ponies. I suspect we’ll be here for a long time, and I want your honest opinions on these reports and speeches, do not just agree with me. If we are to curtail any attempts by the Changelings to turn this into another invasion, we must keep the populace as calm as possible, and trust in the stalwart Guards to keep Queen Chrysalis and her brood firmly in hoof.”

“Were you … expecting company, your majesty?” One of the cart-pulling Ponies asked awkwardly as one of her companions helped her get unhitched. “There’s … a lot of food here.”

Blinking in surprise, Celestia turned to ask what the Pony meant, Discord and herself had finished off all the food and drink half-way through the last movie, only to see the platters piled high with donuts, muffins and an chilled water-cooler full of chocolate milk the size of a small minotaur.

Bless your scoundrel’s heart, Discord. Celestia thought with more than a little affection. “I was expecting a long night going over the speech, if that’s what you meant. Take your pick, I’m sure the ... cook ... would be delighted to see a clean platter returned to the kitchens, and let’s get down to business. This nation won’t run itself.”

Chapter 38

CHAPTER 38

“We are taking a tremendous risk allowing you back in the facility right now, Bluebone.” The tall, blonde-maned Unicorn stallion simply nodded to the other Pony, taking a perverse enjoyment in watching a co-conspirator he’d spent decades growing up with, plotting with, twist his face into a grimace of frustration and fear.

My family has held the Shadow Council together for generations. My will, my coin, has forged the connections with the lesser races we need to succeed. The aging Unicorn though proudly as he was ‘escorted’ past Unicorn guards in faceless helmets and blank, sterile steel doors, deeper into the facility underneath Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns than he, or any of the Council proper for that matter, usually bothered.

Here, several levels beneath the rooms and chambers the Shadow Council itself used for it's day-to-day operations, was the domain of the cold, analytical gaze of ‘Professor’ Beaker, where the prisoners of the Shadow Council and other 'test-subjects' languished in magically-shielded cells, unable to escape in any way, shape or form, not even through suicide. Here, the future of an old empire, the true inheritors of the world, waited impatiently to be born anew, to take and mold an imperfect world ruled by imperfect races …

“Damn it, Bluebone, listen to me! Do you have any idea how close the Council is to sanctioning an assassin before you even go to trial? It’s taken every favour I’m owed to get them to even let you back into the Sanctuary, let alone …” Almond Hooves’s harsh complaints were silenced as Bluebone turned to give his oldest friend a warm smile coupled with cold eyes that stared right through the other Stallion.

“That is why I am here, Almond. To make sure that all that I know, all that I have pushed this Council towards, will survive, nay, thrive should the worst happen and I fall to the Whore-Princess's minions.” Bluebone said after several long, painful moments of eye-contact with the other Stallion, whom had been either unwilling or unable to look away. “My wretched heir is utterly worthless, a traitor to his own kind and a willing servant of that treacherous bitch on the throne, and let us be brutally honest, my friend, the Council has about as much cohesion as a wet paper bag without a member of the Blue Clan at it’s head. Should I fall, the end of our great work will come in months, if not sooner, due to all the bickering and fighting for position the lesser Clans indulge in.”

“So what in the name of Faust herself does returning to the lair of the very Ponies who’ll have you murdered in your sleep have to do with coming down into this place? None of the Council-Members have any trust or liking for Beaker, they only put up with that sadist because he’s the only scientist who has the talent and the … the personality required to perform the acts to advance our cause. He’s no more loyal to our cause than a rock, and he only obeys us because we lavish bits on his side projects, projects that seem more and more ghoulish by the day!” Almond retorted, shaking his head as if to chide himself before trotting forwards and placing a hoof on Bluebone’s shoulder. “For the love of every God, they might just give you to that soulless bastard just to get their hands on the bloodline of Princess Platinum, to ensure whatever monstrosity that Beaker churns out next has some measure of authenticity. Let’s just get out of here already! I’ve already got a team of the best lawyers that bits can buy lined up to defend you against any charge the Princess can level at you. It might take a few years, but you’ll come out as a hero to the Unicorns and we’ll use the whole thing as a chance to paint Princess Celestia as a tyrant trying to crush a political rival with spurious accusations.”

“Your funds are not limitless, Almond. And mine have all been lost to me, at least until I can prove my innocence. If this is a ploy by one of our own to claim the chairmanship of our Shadow Council, they will inevitably make a play to remove me from the board, one way or another. Thus, it is vital I see Beaker immediately, to ensure that the Great Work does not fail.” Sighing, Bluebone returned the gesture even as he inwardly sneered at Almond’s theatrics. You always were so damned dependant upon me and my family’s connections. If you lose me, the rest of the Council will tear you apart and divide up your family’s wealth into so many pieces your children will be lucky to have a brass bit to call their own.

Traversing the cold, sterile halls in blessed silence now, Bluebone eyed the walls with a keen eye, although others might have called it morbid. Most of the test-subjects for artificial alicornization had perished, of course, but the good ‘doctor’ had managed to find new ways to preserve the remains, not just as ghoulish trophies but as a visible reminder that each loss put them a step closer to true success.

A malformed corpse here, a pair of entwined cadavers there, a pile of raw flesh that still quivered with unnatural life behind a barrier of solid magic, a piece-meal Alicorn made of ‘donated’ body-parts whose frame was only held together by the enchanted plates of armor and mithril stitches as the pieces sought to violently separate, even years after the poor wretch had expired.

The price of progress is always paid for in blood. Bluebood thought grimly as he passed a gruesome trophy locked in magical stasis whose face he recognized, and whose presence made Almond turn green and move away to the other side of the hallway. A wretched nephew of one of the Council, a wastrel and drunkard whose only value had been the refined blood flowing in his veins. Blood that had proven to be worthless in the grand scheme of things, the poor fool’s body unable to survive the infusion of divine essence from Celestia, his veins literally exploding out of his skin as the divine substance rejected the mortal host almost instantly, but whose imperfect fusion with the essence of an Alicorn also ensured his body would perpetually regenerate.

Finally the hallway ended behind a pair of heavy adamantite doors that looked very much out-of-place, having more in common with the armored doors on the vaults of Canterlot’s treasury than in the almost hospital-like confines of the Sanctuary, yet with a low, ear-piercing squeal and the low grind of dozen of gears moving against each other within them, the doors slowly swung open, exposing the room the Council liked to call ‘the Pit of Tartarus’ when the Pony who reigned here was out of ear-shot.

“Professor Beaker.” Bluebone said, loudly and without preamble, walking into the room as if it were the most natural thing in the world, a difficult task considering the Pony he was speaking to was up to his hocks in the guts of a Hydra, whose heads wriggled impotently in the cast-iron shackles of the operating table, either in pain or rage, Bluebone did not care.

“I am … hmmm … busy.” Beaker replied calmly, not looking up as the blank-faced Unicorn rooted around in the pulsating innards of the poor beast, poking and prodding with a dozen different tools, all wielded at once with clockwork precision as he dissected the living subject and watched the Hydra’s regenerative abilities piece the organs back together.

“I am aware, but it is urgent. Finish up as soon as you can and meet me in your office.” Bluebood replied, giving one of the pale-faced ‘assistants’ a glare to hammer home the point it was an order.

A young Mare led the two Stallions up to Beaker’s ‘office’, a long rectangular room that hung over the operating room that dominated the ‘Pit’, the floor made of thick glass that gave one a disconcerting feeling that they were floating above the ghoulish nightmare of medical equipment and arcane paraphernalia, and the filing cabinents and sole desk that graced the observation deck bolted into the walls and were thus kept off the glass floor only helped reinforce the feeling.

Bluebone had the distinct feeling that Beaker, bland, emotionless and utterly practical, had had the room built precisely to make other Unicorns uncomfortable, to have ‘nothingness’ under their hooves, to make them emotionally vulnerable and thus more willing to agree to his demands. The aging Unicorn gave the odd scientist a mental salute even as he fought down the waves of vertigo the unusual room caused, while Almond simply settled for turning pale and sweating heavily, although Bluebone suspected his friend’s condition might have had more to do with having a bird’s eye view of the squirming guts of the captive Hydra below than any sense of vertigo.

The bastard doesn’t even bother with sewing the beast up … or is he measuring the beast’s regenerative ability? The blond-maned Unicorn wondered silently as Beaker finally gave in to the prompting of his aides and stepped away from his latest project, having words of some kind with the closest assistant before stepping under a shower to sluice the green, slime-like blood of the Hydra off his hooves and neck before trotting up the staircase to his ‘office’.

“My apologies, Director, Councilor. Applying what we’ve learned from the Hydra’s regenerative abilities to the Project Eve's reproductive system could increase the ratio of successful incubation of the offspring by a full eleven percent, even without factoring the magical augmentations we intend to implement.” The bland-faced young Unicorn explained in his monotone voice, walking past the two seated Stallions without so much as a flicker of respect for their stations, making Bluebone smirk slightly and Almond’s colour return somewhat as anger warred with his vertigo. “I have an assistant monitoring the regeneration process now, so what did you need? If we are to proceed with your request for a hybrid womb to create a artificial Alicorn, and complete it within the timeframe you have specified, I cannot be distracted from my work.”

“Do you follow the news, Professor?” Bluebone asked in a pleasant tone, ignoring the confused glance Almond shot him.

“I’ve little time for the public media, it’s mostly a sham anyways, political maneuvering for control of the limited attention-span of the public. Or do you speak of the up-coming court-case against yourself, Director Bluebone?” Beaker replied evenly in his monotone voice, seating himself smoothly and turning those calm, dead eyes to the two Stallions with all the interest of a Stallion watching paint dry. “What is the purpose of that question, since you already knew the answer?”

“Matters have … complicated on the surface. I will be unlikely to deliver the required ingredient we discussed at a later date, so we will have to do it now, while I am still accessible.” Bluebone replied simply.

“What ingredient?” Almond asked, eyes narrowing as he looked between the serene, in-control face of Bluebone, and the blank, bland mask of Beaker. “Dammit Bluebone, you know the Council insists on having a full briefing on Project Eve and the Hybrid Womb, if they hear you’ve been slipping the nutty professor here things on the sly after all the shit that’s hit the fan recently, they will have you killed, no if’s or but’s!”

Beaker turned his expressionless face to the swearing Almond, then back to Bluebone, his expression not shifting or cracking as Almond’s ranting turned to panicked pleading for them to leave now, before things got worse, before the Council turned on them both, before the Great Work was undone before it even began.

“I believe one of my assistants can assist with the procurement.” He said simply after a few moments of thought looking down at the number of assistants working with cold precision in the Pit below. “I will page her and inform them of what is required, they will collect the ingredient, and our business is concluded for now.”

“A pleasure as always, Professor Beaker, to work with somepony else who values efficiency.” Bluebone stood up, nodded to the dead-eyed Professor and then to his friend and left the observation room, trotting down the stairs with a smirk on his handsome face.

“For the love of Faust’s right tit! What ingredient?” Almod exploded, almost livid with rage. “I’ve half a mind to go to the Council right now and let them know all about this! Bastards, ignoring me after all I’ve done to help you both!”

“Your anger is misplaced, Councilor Almond Hooves.” The ‘Professor’ replied after pushing a button on his desk that, after a few moments, summoned one of his assistants, the young Mare bustling up the stairs and rubbing shoulders with Bluebone, whose smile grew even wider as the much younger Mare cringed away from him. “The request to procure the ingredient is already lodged with the Council, after all. My assistant will take it from Director Bluebone, and the Great Work will continue on, regardless of what happens to the Director after this moment.”

Mouth working silently in rage for several moments, finally, the befuddled Stallion exploded just as the young assistant entered the observation room. “WHAT IS THIS DAMN INGREDIENT?” Almond swore, turning to face the dead-eyed scientist with his horn sparkling with an attack-spell ready to launch.

“Ah, Cubic, punctual as always. Your answer, Councilor Almond Hooves, is genetic material. The best source of the genetic material of the Platinum Bloodline we can currently access, specifically, being either Bluebone, or his progeny, Blueblood. Cubic will procure a sample from the Director to assist with the creation of the Artificial Alicorn, as simple as that.”

“A blood sample, Professor?” The young Mare asked, a demure smile on her face. “Exactly how much am I permitted to take? All of it, by any chance?”

“Not blood, Cubic. Semen. As much as you can harvest.” Beaker replied, his bland mask of a face not so much as twitching as the expressions on both Cubic’s and Almond’s faces turned ashen.

“Bluebone is providing the … but the Hybrid Womb is … the unicorn sample is … oh Faust!” Almond whispered, all but fleeing the observation room with his face turning green, barrelling past Bluebone and several startled scientists and out the door that kept the Pit safely quarantined from the rest of Sanctuary.

“B-but Professor, you want me to extract …” Cubic whimpered before biting off the complaint and shaking herself like a wet dog. “V-very well, sir, if that is your order.”

“I am ordering you to take two samples, Cubic. One for our work with the Hybrid Womb, the other as a backup. You will act as the incubator for the backup.” Beaker monotone at his assistant, whose face went from ashen-grey to pale white, and her knees wobbled as she grasped the meaning of the Professor’s words.

“B-but sir, there’s no guarantee that it would … I’m not ready to be … Bluebone? He’s a m-monster!” She quailed, collapsing onto her hind-quarters as she searched Beaker’s face for some sign, any sign, that this was some sort of sick joke.

“You know that all who work in the Pit have everything about them recorded, to ensure security both in and out of the lab. Your biometric rhythms suggest that today is one of your most fertile days, so conception should be relatively simple with the right fertility spell.” Beaker stood up and walked around the table, his voice as calm as if discussing the weather even as his assistant sobbed in distress. “Consider, Cubic, that Bluebone is also wealthy in connections and bloodlines, if not material wealth at the moment. Any offspring you carry will be as close to a pure-blooded descendant of Princess Platinum as we can achieve at this stage. This sacrifice will gain you much favour with the Shadow Council, whom likely already plot Bluebone’s demise to protect their secrets from Princess Celestia.”

“Fact: Bluebone is unlikely to survive unless he can continue to play the various factions amongst the Shadow Council against one another, and his ability to do so without access to his funds is severely limited, thus he is unlikely to ever come into contact with you again."

"Fact: Blueblood is the only other ‘pure-bred’ descendant of Princess Platinum, and despite having an entire Herd of young, fertile Mares that are known to be utterly devoted to him, has not produced any offspring himself at all despite being sexually active for some time, and is thus likely sterile."

"Fact: I am prepared to use my influence with the Council to ensure that you may raise the child as your own, without interference. You may raise it as a lab animal, a cherished offspring or foster it out to any Pony with close ties to the Shadow Council if you so wish it.”

Sniffling, Cubic lay on the floor for a few moments more before taking a deep breath and shakily getting back on her hooves.

“I’ll … do it, Professor. If you’ll hold to your promises, I’ll do it, with one more condition.” Cubic said in a voice marred by the bubble of mucus in her nostrils from her crying.

“Your condition then?”

“I want to be your second, in everything. All your notes, all your research, your other projects outside of the Hybrid Womb and the work on Project Eve, I want to be involved in it all, as your student. I want to assist you in it all, to learn directly from you.” The young Mare said sharply, eyes wet with tears even as she locked them into the calm, dead eyes of the ‘Professor’. “That’s the condition. I’ll act the part of the brood-mare if you’ll ensure I have full access to your research, and can assist you directly in it.”

Beaker blinked once, then twice, tilted his head to the side and then, of all things, smiled, the very faintest upward curling of the corners of his mouth, a smile that would have made brave Guardsponies’ blood run cold, but only gave young Cubic the courage to hold her head up high.

“Cubic, I would enjoy nothing more that a fellow scientist who understood the cost of sacrifice assisting me with my research. Consider your terms accepted.” The ‘Professor’ said, still ‘smiling’ as his horn flashed with the casting of a spell, sickly grey-green sparks floating lazily from his horn swirl around Cubic, coming to rest on her belly and under her tail and flashing brightly before fading into her skin. “That temporary Heat spell will accelerate your biorhythm to the optimum level to ensure a successful conception, but it will only last a half-hour at most. Move quickly and endure, for the sake of the Great Work.”

“Yes sir.” Cubic sniffed one last time, saluted, and walked slowly but determinedly down the stairs, heading towards the leering Stallion with the blonde mane and white coat that had marked the descendants of Princess Platinum for thousands of years.

“Soon” Beaker said out loud to empty air, his face settling back into the blank, expressionless mask that so frightened so many amongst the Shadow Council, his eyes flicking towards a large cage that hung suspended from the roof of the Pit, where three sets of eyes glared out from one of the grates designed to allow fresh air in to the occupants. “Soon, you will help me understand what makes an Alicorn special. Then, we all will be special ... or none of us will be.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hell of a day.” Applejack groaned, looking out the window where Scootaloo, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Bell were chasing Winona around the shed, the three fillies laughing and chattering happily, the dressing down she’d given them seemingly forgotten.

Well, not entirely, she was sure of that. Taking Apple Bloom aside after they’d gotten home, Applejack had given the biggest bear-hug she felt the filly could take and apologizing for her tone.

“Ah ain’t mad at you, lil’ Bloom. Ah’m scared, right proper scared, that someday ah’ll be called down to the hospital ‘cause you’ll have done something an’ hurt y’self worse’n the doc’s can fix.”

“But AJ, ah ain’t a baby no more!” Apple Bloom complained, squirming ineffectively against her sister’s infamous strength. “Ah want mah Cutie Mark right now! T’aint fair that me an’ my friends are the only ones without ‘em at our age!”

“Lil’ Bloom, our family has lost so much already … please, please don’ be makin’ this family have to bury another of our own ‘fore their time. My heart can’t take that, ah jus’ ain’t strong enough to bear the thought o’ y’all getting’ hurt or worse.”

That, Applejack knew with more than a little guilt, had made Apple Bloom tense up in her arms, before the young filly, no, the young Mare, sag and hug Applejack back, promising to show some restraint in the future.

“Eh, for Ponyville, I’d call it about average.” Granny Smith tittered, the rickety old Mare walking ever so slowly to her rocking chair, Big Mac following a few steps behind with a tray carrying the old Mare’s cup of tea and several dozen pills to help deal with her aches and pains. “Didja really clock lil’ miss snooty-pants?”

“Haaaah … yeah, Granny Smith, Ah done punched one of mah best friends in the face today. An’ we jus’ barely avoided bein’ turned into some kinda demon-pony, thanks to Princess Celestia.” Applejack countered wryly, reluctantly leaving her watchful perch to follow Granny Smith and Big Mac to the front porch to indulge in their usual evening ritual of watching the sun set over Ponyville. “Apparently Rares is feelin’ a wee bit guilty about the whole not-believin’-Twilight-again thing, an’ as thanks for getting’ her outta there, an’ lookin’ after Sweetie Bell tonight, she’s springing us a fancy desert from the Cakes.”

“Mmmmm.” Big Mac and Granny Smith groaned at the thought of one of the Cakes’ delicious treats for desert, and all three Apples spent several minutes in quiet, comfortable silence, watching the sun slowly set over Ponyville and the surrounding area, bathing the landscape in beautiful reds, purples and gold as the laughter of the fillies out back and the excited barking of the family dog filled the air.

This. This is what it’s all about. Applejack sighed happily. Whatever else the day might have thrown at her, however bad things might have gotten, here she was at the end of another day, with her family, watching the day end in peace and quiet. My family, the day ending peacefully, and the promise of a better tomorrow.

“Hey Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaay-jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!”

Okay, so the promise of a long night, little sleep and then a better tomorrow, hopefully ending with a long night of sleep. The blonde farmpony sighed and looked up into the evening sky, where a familiar blue shape was descending rapidly towards the farmhouse, carrying a large white box awkwardly between her front hooves. “Well that’s a surprise! Sugarcube, everythin’ alright?”

“Just fine, but damn, when Rarity pays you back, she pays you back!” Rainbow Dash shouted back, a big grin plastered across her face as the three fillies all came running to see what was happening. “Wait till you see this thing, AJ! It’s the cake to end all cakes!”

Getting the Cutie Mark Crusaders to back off long enough for Rainbow Dash to land, and keep the now thoroughily over-excited Winoa from mobbing the cyan-blue Pegasus, took longer than the mentally-exhausted farm-mare had hoped, but once a vague sense of order was established and everypony marched in to witness this ‘marvel’, Applejack did have to admit that tomorrow, she’d probably have to go to the Boutique and thank Rarity.

Three layers of rich-black chocolate cake, separated by layers of thick whipped cream, the whole thing drizzled with caramel sauce, which in turn had been sprinkled with white chocolate flakes and then the top layer had been capped with small mounds of more cream with glazed cherries placed ontop of those.

Even Granny Smith had to admit that this glorious cake would be something to look forwards to, even as the stubborn old Mare’s eyes got that dangerous twinkle in them. We’re gonna be having apple in every dish tonight, or I’ll eat my hat! Applejack laughed to herself as she dragged Scootaloo and Applebloom back from the cake, while Big Mac did the same for Sweetie Bell and Rainbow Dash.

“Go on, y’all, and wash up for dinner. Granny Smith an’ ah will get dinner on.”

“You sure you don’t want some help?” Rainbow Dash asked as Big Mac turned his considerable efforts to herding the complaining fillies up the stairs to the bathroom. “I mean, I am kind of crashing the party here.”

“Now you listen here, missy!” Granny Smith quavered from the kitchen, her voice fragile but playful in a way that made cheeky grins appear on both Applejack’s and Rainbow’s faces. “You came aaaaaaall the way out here to deliver that dee-lish-us looking cake, an’ you’re a friend of the family too, heck you’re almost an Apple by association now any-who’s. There’ll always be room at our table for you!”

“Oh … wow, Granny Smith, thank you …” Rainbow Dash said, her features going sombre at those words.

“And my lil’ Jackie’s told me you live on hay-burgers an’ that mick-ro-wave junk when you’re on your own! How’re you gonna do your job right without a proper meal in your belly! Why, in my day …”

The two Mares looked at each other, and rolled their eyes before bursting into giggles at the ancient matriarch’s good-intentioned rambling.

“Do you mind?” Applejack whispered as Rainbow Dash made herself comfortable while listening to the old mare’s lecture. “Ah can distract her, an’ you can sneak upstairs to wash up.”

“Pffft, I can do that in ten seconds flat.” Rainbow Dash smirked and shook her head, heading into the kitchen so that she could listen to the old mare without her having to shout. “Besides, if Granny Smith didn’t care, she wouldn’t complain so much, and you know I … don’t mind that so much.”

“Softie.” Applejack smirked and gave her friend an affectionate nuzzle on the neck before joining her grandmother at the kitchen table, taking the kitchen knife away from the shaking hooves of the matriarch and started chopping up ingredients for the salad as Rainbow Dash settled in for a long, rambling monologue from Granny Smith, a small, sad smile on the blue pegasi’s face as she did so.

Chapter 39 (Clop Light)

CHAPTER 39

“Velvet, this is hardly appropriate!” Thunderwing squeaked, hoping the other Mare had forgotten all her sweet spots even as her rebellious memories gleefully reminded her of exactly what Twilight Velvet used to do with that talented mouth and her magic to Thunderwing’s sensitive wing-membranes and other erogenous zones in the past. “I can wash myself! We’re not ‘that way’ anymore! Think of your husband!”

“Wingy, after all that time we spent with our heads between each other’s legs, this is what you complain about?” Velvet replied with humor, the Unicorn having pinned the Thestral to the tiled foor and then clamped herself to the Thestral’s chest, forcing their bodies together in a, to Thunderwing’s thinking at least, awkwardly intimate angle while her magic rubbed sud-covered sponges over the Thestral’s trembling bat-like wings. “I seem to recall that a certain somebody loved getting dirty while getting clean …”

“B-but you’re married! To Night Light! We never … gaaaaaah-haaaah!” Thunderwing’s protests died in her throat as Velvet manipulated a pair of sponges to rub in very slow, firm circles at the junction of her wing and body, stimulating nerve-clusters that had the bat-like wings of the Thestral straining against the tiles in an effort to stick straight up from the Mare’s back. “Th-that’s cheating!”

“All’s fair in love and war, and I’m not stopping till you stop trying to avoid me!” Velvet replied cheekily, slipping her head past Thunderwing’s as she pulled them both into an even tighter embrace, the Thestral unwilling to break the contact after years of enforced celibacy, or worse still, fearing the rejection might make the situation between herself, Velvet and Night Light even more awkward and painful, and gasping again as Velvet’s teeth nibbled at the base of one of her ears, making the scarred Thestral shiver with excitement, fuelled as much by memories of their wild youth together as the sexy mare molesting her right now.

Thunderwing’s hooves alternated between clutching at Velvet’s own body as the Unicorn’s magic did deliciously devious things to her wings, a fact that was both frustrating and relief-inspiring to the middle-aged Thestral, or trying vainly to push herself along the slick tiled floor and away from the over-sexed Mare ontop of her. She hoped that Velvet hadn’t noticed that her ‘teasing’ had had a very profound effect on the Thestral’s lower body, and Thunderwing certainly hoped that the moisture she felt dripping onto her lower half was due to the steam beading on the walls and not the sweaty, sexually-dominant mare clinging to her.

My instructors would be spinning in their graves right now! I should have locked the door behind me! This is Twilight VELVET, for the love of Faust! I, of all Ponies, should know that you never leave yourself vulnerable like this when she’s in the mood! I should have seen the signs with how she’s been acting towards Night Light and myself and defended myself appropriately! Thunderwing cursed herself silently as she struggled not only against the unexpectedly strong grip of the Unicorn ontop of her, but the sensations Velvet’s magic was causing at the base of the Thestral’s wings and the …

“Fffffhoooo!” Thunderwing gasped as Velvet slipped on the tiles, dropping her lower body right ontop of Thunderwing’s with a loud squelch, both Mares clenching each other tightly and Thunderwing reluctantly confirming that it was not condensation that had been soaking her belly-fur. “Ve-velvet, we have to stop, the others …”

“It’s been so long since I last held you, Thunderwing. So long since my Herd-Mate was with me.” Velvet whimpered, somehow molding herself to Thunderwing so tightly that the Thestral wondered if they were melting together in the steam. “You never responded to our letters, our requests to meet you, not even when my little Shining asked you to stop by and talk to us!”

“A-a-aaaaah! Aaaaand how does molesting me solve thaaaat?” Thunderwing couldn’t help but moan as Velvet moved against her in ways she was sure a Pony body shouldn’t be able to do, the strict General of the Night Guard finding her strength fading away under Velvet’s lusty assault.

“It’s simple …” Velvet whispered before lifting up her front half, keeping Thunderwing pinned by the junction of their hips, the white-and-purple mane of the Mare waving with an arcane breeze as Velvet’s horn glowed, and several large, obscene items teleported into the room, wiggling and jiggling of their own accord as the Unicorn’s magic interacted with the magical batteries inside them. “I’m going to remind you how much of a good thing the three of us had together. And point out it’s still not too late for us to form that Herd...”

“Wait wait wait!” Thunderwing whimpered, eyes widening as she looked at the odd shapes and protuberances on the devices and realized these ‘toys’ had been modelled on non-pony males. Exceptionally endowed ones at that! “Those aren’t … you aren’t seriously … not here!”

“Oh don’t worry, my sweet little Wingy … they’re water-proof!”

“That’s not what I meaaaaaaaant!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, uhm, Night, think I figured out wha’ you forgot t’ask Thunderwing to grab last time she was out.” Spud said nervously, the Ponies seated at the dinner-table desperately paying attention to the cards they held in their hooves, ears flattening against their heads as the noises from above them grew louder and louder.

“Something to sound-proof the house?” Night Light offered tartly, blushing brilliant red from shame and embarrassment as the entire household, and perhaps the neighbours too, had to listen to the not-entirely-sold-on-the-idea-but-most-certainly-getting-there cries of Thunderwing and Velvet’s slightly-less-loud-and-very enthusiastic encouragements on said ‘idea’.

“Nay, tranquilizers for your mate, if we had known she would be in this state.” Spud’s ‘First’ wife, a Zebrican beauty by the name Vet’kloue, muttered darkly, blushing softly under her stripes as Spud’s three wives walked into the room, the tall Zebra swatting her stocky, ugly husband with her tail to display her irritation. “Surely into the backyard we can go, watch the flowers and not listen to that …”

“Phew, it is hot in here, non? Ma parole, ils vont certainement à mal!” The second Mare in Spud’s Herd, a petite little Prench Mare who went by name of Honeydip, with porcelain-white fur and almost-pearlescent mane and tail tittered, nudging the ‘First’ wife teasingly as the tall, stern Zebra gave her herd-mate a sour look. “And I recall a certain Mare who is just as loud in her praises, or am I mistaken, ma belle géant?”

“Heck, ah seem to recall a certain somepony who’d sneak off with our husband for a bit o’ afternoon delight in jus’ about any spot wit’ a wee bit o’ privacy!” Autumn Glory, a russet-red Pegasi with pale golden mane and tale, added in her slow drawl, earning a face-swat from Vet’koue’s tail in response as the Zebra flushed just in time for another round of awkward moaning from the upstairs bathroom.

“Ugh … first thing tomorrow, I’ll go out and try to pick something up … but I’ll need some backup. Anyone want to volunteer as packmules, lads?” Night Light said loudly, ducking as Autumn Glory, ever pugnacious, reciprocated with a swat of her own tail to the taller Zebra and a bawdy comment about her ‘flashing’ the other Ponies.

“Errr, but weren’t you jus' talkin’ 'bout how we might be in trouble with our, eh, better halves cause of the boxes, Night?” Spud asked softly, leaning over to Night Light and away from his wives in the hope of avoiding being asked to pick a side as Honeydip, Autumn and Vet’kloue started a rapid-fire argument in a mix of Equestrian, Prench and Zebrican, the content of which Night Light only barely understood but made him wonder just how his former CO managed to keep the his Herd from killing him via sex.

“Spud.” Night Light said flatly, shaking his head to try and dismiss the horrific mental images that were trying to lodge themselves in his brain, forever. “You can either stay here with our possibly-enraged wives and partners, with no way out and nowhere to run, or you can come with me and help me pick up some supplies and be proactively looking after their …”

“OH FAUST I’M NOT SUPPOSED TO STRETCH LIKE THAT!”

“… their dignity, and our collective sanity.” Night Light finished, wiping somepony’s mouthful of coffee off his face as the table collectively spluttered, laughed or coughed loudly at Thunderwing’s inadvertent addition to the conversation.

When the entire table’s worth of Ponies, Stallions and Mares alike, shot their hooves up into the air, Night Light just groaned and face-hoofed.

“Okay, how about we draw straws then.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Despair.

Agony.

Those two words encompassed Sunset’s entire world as she lay on the cot in her cell, unable to find the energy to move, to do anything other than stare at the bleak rectangle of nigh-indestructible metal that kept her sealed in this horrible room.

Any attempt to cast a spell more potent than the basic telekinesis spell all Unicorns developed as small children would send her own magic spiralling back into her horn, a brutal feedback that felt like a thousand sledgehammers pounding their way through her skull from the inside out, and even with her new metallic hooves, Sunset doubted she’d be able to do anything more than scuff the walls of her cell, let alone that infernal door, before the Guards stationed outside of her cell could activate some other defence that would lay her low.

The perfect trap, the perfect defences for one who was beyond mortal, beyond mundane limitations. A perfect prison for a perfect being. An absolute existence above that of mere mortals. A Princ…

A demon.

It wasn’t true! IT WASN’T TRUE! She was a Princess, a Princess, not some monster! Twilight had purified her, surely that had been the end of it, Sunset could remember the sensation of the powers of Harmony washing over her, like the sensation of being embraced by something akin to cool silk and comforting warmth all at the same time, washing away her anger, her hatred, even her fear …

Twilight Sparkle, in that strange bipedal form, the focal point of the magic that was touching Sunset in a way that not even Princess Celestia’s solar energies ever had, healing her of scars that Sunset hadn't even known she possessed.

And it had kindled a foreign sensations in Sunset, something she’d not felt for years. Hope. Admiration. Love. Here was somepony just like her, somepony who had gone through all the trials and burdens that Sunset had endured, but had become something else, something better. All the jealousy and spite she felt towards Celestia’s new ‘puppet’ had melted away as much under that revelation as the power of Harmony that stripped the distorted energies she had absorbed from the Element of Magic, replaced with …

“Your majesty, the Succuponi is not badly injured, and her regenerative powers are already quickly repairing what injuries her spell-casting inflicted on her. I would recommend we leave the room quickly, before Sunset Shimmer can recover enough to take one of us hostage, or worse.”

“In a … in a moment, Magi. Sunset, if you can hear me, please understand that your stay here will only be temporary, perhaps a year or two at most. Twilight is … in a delicate state right now, and is in no position to work on a cure for your fiendish transformation until her current condition has stabilized, but I promise that we will devote all our power and resources to finding a way to reverse this affliction. Be brave and endure this, and know you are not alone, no matter how things might seem.”

Despair.

A year, no, years in this featureless, bland room with nothing but her loneliness and longing? With meals delivered via a small, armored grate in the door and wastes removed via the same, and Guards who refused to answer her, if the thick layers of enchantments on the door, floor, walls and ceiling even allowed sound to pass out of the cell.

Years with only her memories of Twilight to sustain her, memories tainted by that blue whorse who had been all over Sunset’s beloved, tall, dark, perfectly proportioned and …

Hate.

It overwhelmed Sunset for a moment with the surge of loathing and hatred that washed over her as she pictured this ‘Luna’ putting her hooves all over Sunset’s Twilight, seducing her, corrupting her against the pure love that surely existed between Twilight and … that had to be the reason why Twilight hadn’t been able to understand! With the wretched and incompetent Trixie already underhoof throwing Sunset off and making her unable to show her beloved Twilight the truth …

Hope.

That was the key. Hope. Hope in the bond she and Twilight shared. Hope that the destined link between them would endure, that she could somehow reach out to Twilight beyond these bars without giving these scared little Ponies and Celestia the Hypocrite any further reasons to lock her ever more deeply away.

“Guardsponies? If you can hear me, I have a request. Please … I need a quill, some ink and some paper for my … rehabilitation.” Sunset said loudly, resisting the urge to smirk as she saw the helmeted head visible through the grate in the door swivel towards her as she spoke. “I believe they’re called ‘Friendship Reports’?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Can you sleep?” Twilight whispered to the Mare next to her, both Luna and Twilight lying on their backs, heads resting on the same pillow.

“With that racket?” Luna whispered back, giggling a little as one of the Stallions asleep in the hallway made a hilarious sound, halfway between a snore and a stutter. “I’m surprised the neighbours aren’t throwing horse-shoes at us in protest.”

“I … yeah. But I meant with everything, not just the Royal Guards’ snoring. A Pony I tried to help turned into a literal Demon and I assumed that just a single dose of Harmony could turn her back, WITHOUT DOUBLE-CHECKING THAT SHE REALLY WAS PURIFIED, Trixie is trapped halfway between Demonkind and Ponykind thanks to my inattention to Sunset’s condition, half the Town thinks this whole disaster was my fault and are likely going to try to sue me, Mayor Mare ended up in the hospital after overdosing on anti-reflux medication …” Sighing gustily, Twilight scooted over so she could cuddle up against Luna’s side, feeling the need for physical contact with at least one Pony who could share her perspective. “My mind just keeps … tripping over everything that’s happened, and then I think of what comes next, and it just keeps getting worse …”

“Do you want to try the breathing exercises?” Luna offered softly, gently taking one of Twilight’s hooves and holding it between both of her own. “Believe me, I understand. I can fully appreciate stewing in your own fears about the future, I see it almost every night in the dreams of my Ponies, I feel it myself every time the paper-ponies decide to claim I am some sort of monster waiting for my next chance to rebel. Breathe, and talk to me, Twilight.”

After several deep, shuddery breathing exercises, Twilight did just that, babbling about all the stresses that had been bottled up in her, weeping and apologising as she sobbed into Luna’s chest and clung to the larger Alicorn who held her in turn, gently brushing Twilight’s mane with a hoof and whispering “It’s okay.” When Twilight found herself too choked up to continue coherently.

“Suh-sorry.” Twilight sniffled afterwards, feeling limp and small after unloading all her stress onto Luna like that. “Ah-I’ve got bo-boogers on your mane…”

“It’s fine, Twilight, I had far worse than mucus stuck in my hair, and these days …” Luna giggled, her flowing ‘mane’ rippling as the gunk Twilight had left in it dissipated, leaving the night sky-like mane pristine again. “Well, let’s just say there’s a reason why there was no position as the Royal Hairdresser until Cadence came along. Celestia has to do our hair, and her own, if we want something other than what the Creators gave us.”

“But I do have something in mind. Something to take your mind off of today.” The Lunar Alicorn whispered, a mischevious smile on her face as she drew Twilight tightly against her.

“I, uhm, I’m not really in the mood …” Twilight muttered, blushing as she felt her and Luna’s bodies pressing tightly togther in interesting ways.

“OH! No, not that Twilight, I’m going to take you on your first visit to the Realm of Dreams … I never got to take you there before we first, you know … sparked off this whole mess.”

“Ungh, you’re lucky you’re so cute, Luna, that pun was terrible …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was somewhat disturbing to see her body sleeping peacefully below her, wrapped in Luna’s hooves, but Twilight did have to admit this wasn’t her first out-of-body experience while in Luna’s embrace.

At least we’re not bucking each other senseless like it’s the end of the world this time

Wait, are you telling me this happened before?

Awkwardly spinning in the air with her new ‘body’, a misty copy of her physical body, connected by a silvery umbilical cord that ran from her ‘astral’ body’s navel to her ‘real’ body, Twilight flailed through the night sky as she beheld Luna’s astral body.

Easily large enough to have filled the entire room if ‘Luna’ had not folded herself up like a cat on a windowsill, Luna’s astral form was physically similar to her real body, but where in the real world only Luna’s mane and tail took on the appearance of the night sky, now Luna’s entire body appeared to be filled with twinkling stars, and her mane and tail had the appearance of the aurora borealis, made of flames that flickered and danced but did not burn.

LUNA?

Yes, Twilight?

Y-yuh-you’re huge!

Is that a shot about my weight, Twilight?

No, I mean your body, uh, your body here, it’s so big!

This is actually the smallest form I can manage at the moment. If I were at full strength, I could compress myself down to the size of a normal Pony for this. Sadly, weakened as we both are, this is the best I can manage.

I … okay, I’ll bug you about the mechanics behind Astral Projection later. You said something about visiting the Realm of Dreams?

Excellent, you are learning, and without needing belly-rubs!

Ha. Ha. Ha.

Given the nature of the Realm of Dreams, and our own relative ‘weakness’, I will be carrying you through the Realm, and we won’t go far, no more than a few sleepers within Ponyville at best so we remain within easy reach of our bodies should something drastic happen.

Uh … what is ‘drastic’? I’ve warded our room with every non-lethal spell I could think of, from anti-scrying wards to protection spells making the walls, windows and …

Both ‘Astral’ Ponies flinched as the door rattled on its hinges for several moments, before a pitiful whine of “Mistreeeeeeeeess …” was heard.

… and the door as hard as steel, as well as impervious to phasing magic or teleportation spells that I don’t cast myself.

Handy that, especially when your ‘devoted servant’ just navigated the hallway full of sleeping Guardponies to come molest you in your sleep.

… I’m going to have to deal with that tomorrow, aren’t I?

I wouldn’t worry. I suspect that Trixie will soon learn her lesson. Several of those guards are what you would call‘snuggle fiends’, and I just sent those nearest Trixie the impression that their lovers or desired partners were sleeping near them.

Meaning?

Meaning that Trixie is about to be, how do you say, ‘glomped’? Perhaps a taste of her own medicine will convince the showmare to keep her hooves to herself. Now, to the matter at hoof.

Before Twilight could protest at Luna’s ‘use’ of the sleeping Guardsponies, the giant ‘Astral’ form of the Lunar Princess swept forwards, her mane flowing around Twilight’s own floating astral projection and carrying them out through the wall without so much as tripping a single one of Twilight’s layered protecting wards and charms.

Well, don’t I just feel like an ass. All that work, and it’s worthless against an Astral Projection.

To be fair, dearest Twilight, my domain is the night, and the dream-world. It’s not that your spells were faulty, merely that they were cast to keep out mortal invaders, not an Immortal.

So … what’s the difference? Twilight found herself asking as Luna’s gigantic astral form soared through the night sky, landing on top of a home that Twilight belated realized belonged to the Spa Ponies, Aloe and Vera.

That would … take many days to give you a full understanding of the difference between a mortal, a mortal who has extended their lifespan through magical or alchemical methods, and a true Immortal like my sister, myself, Cadence and soon yourself. Luna’s thoughts came to Twilight as clear as if the other Alicorn was whispering them into her ear. For now, just understand that your spells are like a flyswatter right now. Easily able to deal with flies, but utterly ineffective against something like, say, a Dragon.

… Wow, that makes me feel so much better. Remind me again why Princess Celestia sent me to deal with the greatest threats to the known world while she remained behind in Canterlot with an entire army at her back?

I would rather soothe your bruised ego than bury your battered corpse, Twilight. You are one of the most powerful Ponies I have ever met, talented, resourceful and blessed with natural gifts that will only grow as your Ascension continues. Luna replied sweetly, ‘strands’ of her astral mane squeezing Twilight’s puffed cheeks as the newest Alicorn attempted to sulk with little success. Be aware that entities and forces that stand against my sister will see your Ascension as a direct threat to themselves and their own agendas, and they will seek to test you to see if you can be swayed to their cause, or worse still, attempt to remove you before you become to powerful for them to deal with.

The duration of the Ascension, an entire year, is not known to those outside of a very limited few, but it is sadly commonly believed by many that an Alicorn is vulnerable only during the beginning of their new existence, a fact that was unfortunately given credence when my sister behaved so over-protective of Cadence when she underwent her Ascension. Thus, while our linking through the Sympathy may have been a surprise to all of us, and the side-effects are great, it will mean that I have every excuse now to stay by your side and ensure no harm comes to you.

Oh …

That, and we will have a year at least to figure out what our new … relationship … means to us, and our families, and how we shall proceed. A concern for tomorrow, for tonight, we visit the dreams of these two Ponies and ensure they mean you no harm.

What? Luna! This is Aloe and Lotus, two of the nicest, gentlest Ponies I’ve ever met, and that includes Fluttershy!

Some of the foulest assassins in history had the faces of innocents and the voices of angels, Twilight. Even before your Ascension, Celestia told me that she had to remove agents of the Gryphons, the Minotaurs and even a few of the less powerful nations from around you when you were studying with her in Canterlot, and a few other individuals were ‘convinced’ to clear out of Ponyville before she sent you here to help purify me. And you are vulnerable, Twilight, a fact that I will point out again and again if need be so that you stop taking so many foolish risks. We merely observe their sleeping minds, their fantasies, to gauge their intent, and nothing else.

Wait, isn’t that wildly impractical, as well as a gross invasion of privacy?

For anyone other than myself, I would say your fears are well-founded. Thankfully, the ranks of Astromancers is down to the single digits today due to the binding oaths that is required to be taken before one is allowed to study the techniques, and the oaths I myself swore as the First Astromancer still hold me to silence on a Pony’s dreams unless they represent a threat to the Ponies around them, or the nation as a whole. And I have a firm belief in your moral integrity as well, dearest Twilight.

Besides, what’s the worst we could see? Luna said teasingly as her flaming mane and tail wrapped around Twilight and herself in a blindly beautiful vortex, swirling around and down as both ‘Astral’ Ponies were sucked down into the house, and the sleeping minds of the Ponies within.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Well, that’s odd.” Luna muttered as she and Twilight picked themselves up, looking around the room of swirling colours and half-heard whispers. “It appears that these ‘Spa Pony’ twins share a dream-scape.”

“Is that … common?” Twilight groaned, picking herself up gingerly and inspecting her body, noting that she was ‘herself’ again in colouration, but the same silvery cord ran from her belly and up into the vaguely-defined ‘roof’ of the chamber.

“Amongst twins and others who share a special connection, a shared Dreamscape can arise if the parties involved are mentally and emotionally close. But generally it is unfocused and unstable. This is … very solid, very stable, likely the product of years of shared dreaming.” Luna replied, eyeing the room with a critical eye as she trotted over to Twilight and gave her lover the once over. “Hmm, and you’ve got your limbs in the right order too … well done for your first Dream-Dive.”

“Wha-huh?” The purple alicorn asked in a sickly tone as Luna left her side and began inspecting the shifting walls of the room.

“It’s not fatal or harmful, but when entering the ‘dreamscape’ of another entity, your astral projection can be warped by the subconscious impulses of the dreamer. It normally only takes a small effort to return yourself to normal and does not actually do you any harm, but in the meanwhile the Astromancer looks very, very silly and it can be very disorientating if your form is warped too far from normal.” The Lunar Princess explained as Twilight joined her, Luna’s hooves prodding what looked like a pulsing section of the wall until it twitched, swirled into itself and formed a very fancy-looking door. “It is proof that you have a very strong sense of self and personal identity, which means you’ll be able to handle many of the lesson I have to teach on Astromancy with little need for emotional training.”

"Thanks for the warning in advance!" Twilight hissed, shaking herself like a wet dog and inspecting herself thoroughly for any misplaced body-parts.

"Consider it a lesson, Twilight. In the Astral Plane, the 'Realm of Dreams', reality is what you make it, and you've passed the first lesson with flying colours: Always remember yourself, and never allow another to tell you who or what you are." Teasingly ruffling her peeved lover's mane, Luna opened the door slowly, poked her head through the doorway, sniffed and then flung the door open, flushing slightly.

“Oh dear … uhm … Twilight, do you have any problems with Ponies who, ah, how do I say this … keep things in the family? I am picking up many echoes of former dreams, and I have to say that Aloe and Vera are far closer than I thought sisters could be.”

“You mean like secrets?” Twilight asked, confused as Luna gingerly led the way down the hallway the door had exposed, which looked very much like the interior of the Ponyville Spa to her eyes. “Or did you mean … oh. Oooooooh. Well, that explains why the Spa-Twins never seem to be interested in the Stallions around town.”

“Yeeeeeeees. Except I can smell the, ah, essence of a Stallion quite strongly. And given that we are in a dreamscape, that means the dreamers have to be quite familiar with something to replicate it so strongly in their memories.” Flushingly quite strongly now, Luna’s horn lit with a subtle light as they progressed further down the hallway, passing by several doors that grew more and more ornate as they went further and further in. “That said, I can only sense the presence of five dream-forms in this dreamscape. You, me, the twins and another Mare.”

“A Mare, not a Stallion? And there’s a third dreamer involved in all of this?” Twilight whispered, sniffing the air and crinkling her nose as she caught a pungent scent of musk and fish in the ‘air’, stopping alongside Luna as the Princesses stopped in-front of a pair of heavy double-doors in gaudy Prench-style, heavy with gilt and ornate brasswork.

“No. When I said ‘dream-forms’, Twilight, I mean just that, the presence of sentient or artificial forms within the Dreamscape. If there was a third mind involved on the other side of this door, I would be able to sense them, and a third mind in a shared Dreamscape such as this would be not only rare but entirely unnatural. All I can sense is the twins and a dream-form 'clone’ of a pony they have very strong feelings about engaged in some … ahem … serious lovemaking on the other side of this door.”

Hesitantly, Luna pushed the door open a tiny bit, opening up a crack, resisting the urge to chuckle as Twilight crammed herself in against Luna’s side to peek as well.

“Whatever happened to your moral reservations about privacy?” Luna half-whispered, half-tittered to the Pony whose head was tightly pressed to her neck.

“I … guess I’m just really interested in who Aloe and Lotus would take into their beds, given that you implied they were incestuous.” Twilight whispered back, her astral form blushing so hard that Luna was surprised she didn’t start spontaneously glowing. "I guess Rarity is rubbing off on me."

“Should I be concerned if Rarity is rubbing on you?”

"Ungh, not like that! It's a fig~"

"Figure of speech, I know, I was just teasing you." Luna assured Twilight as the sounds of moaning and wet, lewd noises grew louder and louder.

“OH FAUST!” Three voices cried out at once, startling Luna and making her push the door open further than she planned, giving both ‘intruders’ a full view of the three Ponies writhing together on the bed.

Aloe, Lotus … and Twilight Sparkle.

Chapter 40 (Clop Heavy)

CHAPTER 40

“Mmmm ….” Applejack mumbled happily around her mouthful of cake, savouring the richness of the chocolate cake, the fluffiness and mellowness of the cream and the cloying sweetness of the caramel sauce.

Dang, the Cakes really put themselves out to make this thing on such short notice! The farmpony thought to herself, not a little bit guiltily, as she swallowed her mouthful and took another chunk off her slice with a fork, grinning as she saw the Cutiemark Crusaders forcing themselves to slow down after Granny Smith had warned them that they’d only get a single slice if they acted like pigs at the table.

Granny Smith, bless her old heart, had put on a fancy meal for the girls, and Rainbow, even though Applejack knew it might mean the family lived lean for a few days until the next payment from Filthy Rich came through, but the old Mare would sooner live on hay and ‘rejected’ apples than allow a guest to go hungry.

‘Course, if Princess Celestia does send me those bits … Applejack found herself thinking of things she’d long since convinced herself they didn’t need. A more modern kitchen, a reliable water-heater for the shower that didn’t need a kick and a prayer in the morning to deliver hot water, maybe an actual television for the family room, rather than the old radio that had held pride of place longer than either Applejack or Mig Mac had been alive. And we’d have more than enough bits left over even after fixin’ up the house an’ replacin’ all them old tools we’ve been keepin’ workin’ with spit’n’twine. Enough to see Applebloom going to school for years to come if we don’t get greedy. Enough to hire farm-hands so Big Mac an’ myself can take a day off every now an’ again.

The sums kept appearing in her head, and Applejack grinned as much from the delicious cake as the thought of actually having spare bits in her pocket the next time she saw a pretty dress in windows of Rarity’s boutique, rather than having to say she didn’t need any frippy foo-foo stuff. Big Mac might actually have the bits to take Fluttershy out on a proper date and they could finally stop beating around the bush …

Heck, she might even be able to take time off the farm and finish her own education …

“Oh. My. Glorb.” The entire Apple family couldn’t help but laugh as Rainbow Dash mumbled in delight around her giant mouthful of cake, her wings quivering in the air and her eyes crossing, holding the fork between her hooves like it was a holy relic.

“Eeeyup.” Big Mac added, taking another mouthful of his own dessert, the large Stallion’s mouth curling up into a rare smile as the taste of the treat tickled his tastebuds.

“Sooooo gooooooood!” The Cutiemark Crusaders cooed in unison, the spoons wiggling around in their mouths as eager little tongues cleaned every scrap of cake off the utensils before they attacked their slices again, although Sweetie Belle gave Applejack a sly look. “Applejack, you’ve gotta save my sister more often!”

“Hey, yeah, we could arrange that! Cutiemark Crusader Rescue Arrangers!”

“Aaaaaw heck no.” Big Mac retorted, giving all three heads of the Crusaders a gentle ‘bop’ with his hoof as they started yammering at each other about arranging situations for Ponies to ‘rescue’ each other. “Ah don’t reckon Ponyville’s prepared for that kind of shenanigans.”

This is good. Just me, my family, my friend and a good meal. Applejack sighed happily, carving off another mouthful of cake and devouring it with a big smile spreading across her face. Ah know the Princess will make good on those bits, an’ we’ve had a bumper crop this year. Finally things are startin’ to look up for the Apples again!

“Whoo, this cake’s a bit rich for my old gums.” Granny Smith sighed, pushing her half-eaten slice away with a wry smile on her face.

“Do you want me to wrap it up for later, Granny?” Applejack offered as Rainbow and Big Mac set about cutting up smaller slices for the Crusaders, who appeared to be nearly vibrating in their seats at the prospect of a second serving.

“Heh, naw sweetie, you finish it off if you want. Ahm … gonna turn in early, ifn’ it’s all the same to you.” The old Mare said in a soft, quiet voice, her eyes trailing from Applejack, to the Crusaders, then to Big Mac and Rainbow Dash, who were grinning at the Crusaders and their argument about who could eat more of the cake.

“Y’okay, Granny?”

“Jus’ … jus’ tired is all, Jackie. Old an’ tired an’ … worn out these days. Did’ya talk to the Princess yet?” The old Mare’s voice took on an edge as she fixed Applejack with a stern look, to which the farm-pony grinned.

“Had a bit of a pow-wow with Twi an’ Princess Luna early this morning, Granny Smith, before everythin’ went to the dogs. Twi told me to jus’ write a letter an’ she’d get Spike to send it later. Got it waitin’ at the library as we speak for, I jus’ wanted Twi to check it for spellin’ mistakes a’fore it goes.” Applejack couldn’t help but grin as the old mare rolled her eyes in mock-disgust. “She’s a Princess, Granny. Can’t be sendin’ her no letter wit’ mistakes in it now, not with what we’re askin’ for!”

“Pfffft, it’s the princess, ah think she’d be more’n happy to get a letter from any o’ her friends. Even if you are askin’ for the bits you’re owed.”

“Bits an’ tellin’ her jus’ what we’d be usin’ it for.”

“They’re your bits, y’silly filly!”

“Maybe, but ah turned ‘em down b’fore, Granny. Might be Celestia gave ‘em to somepony else who needed ‘em. Think it be proper to let her know why we be wantin’ ‘em now, don’t you think?”

“Meh … if’n you think that’s best, then you do that. I’m too old to worry about those kind of things now.” Granny Smith muttered, pushing away from the table and saying good-night to the other Ponies, either oblivious to or ignoring the worried look Applejack was shooting her.

Since when does Granny Smith leave the table first? She might nod off and have a kip, but she don’t leave when there’s guests present!

“Sis! SIS! Can we have more cake?” Applebloom asked loudly, breaking Applejack out of her musing as she watched the old matriarch of the family shuffle out of the living room and down the hallway to her bedroom on the ground floor.

“Wha-huh? Y-yeah, sure Bloom, jus’ don’t make y’selves sick, okay.”

“Oh come on, AJ, they’re not fillies anymore, what’s the worst that could happen?” Rainbow Dash chortled as she pulled the cake closer to her to cut more slices off the glorious desert.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Breed me! Fucking breed me, you magnificent bitches!”

Luna’s eyebrows went so high they nearly merged with her mane, and from the muffled squeak-like noise that Twilight made, the vulgar words spilling out of her ‘Dream Doppleganger’ was as shocking to the newest Alicorn as it was to Luna herself.

Sandwiched between Aloe and Lotus, the dream-version of Twilight pumped herself up and down on the shafts of the Earth Pony twins, screaming in delight and uttering obscenities as the twins pulled on her mane, slapped her cutiemark and pressed on the bases of her wings, both of them grunting and uttering similar commentary about how tight and wet ‘Twilight’ was.

“Well … consider this an impromptu lesson on the dangers of walking blindly into a Dreamscape.” Luna managed to say after several moments of stunned silence, wincing as her voice cracked as she spoke.

“Eeeeeeee …” Twilight whined, having turned into a roughly pony-shaped lump on the floor, unable to look away from the scene before her where both twins, apparently hermaphrodites in their shared dream, were ravaging her dream doppleganger’s honeypot with tremendous vigor to the point that Luna was certain a mortal Pony’s body would have been ruined for life.

“Twilight? Twilight, take control of yourself, they cannot see nor hear us unless I will it so.” The Lunar Princess reached down with a wing and none-too-gently picked up her lover and placed her onto shaky hooves. “While … rather uncomfortable, such dreams are rather common.”

“Common?” The smaller, purple Alicorn whimpered, finally averting her gaze from the lewd scene before them with a look of mingled shock, horror and amazement on her face. “THAT is common?”

“The … rutting? Yes. The fetishes on display here are … relatively new to me too, Twilight, although I will admit dreams involving you, or a ‘idealized’ versions of yourself, have become an increasing trend in the dreams of our little Ponies as your exploits have continued.” Luna explained, blinking as the trio on the huge, spacious bed moved again, assuming a new position, the blue twin pulling out with a loud groan from all three ponies before assuming a position at dream-Twilight’s head, who greedily took the flared shaft, slick with a mixture of juices, into her own mouth … and throat. Yikes, I hope they don't expect Twilight to be able to do that in the real world. “Well … I must admit this is a new one, but it is not the first time I have seen a pony lust for a Princess. Dopplegangers of Celestia, Cadence, even a dream-form in my own shape have been in … ah … positions like this.”

“Please, no more puns.” Twilight whimpered again, staring down at her hooves in embarrassment. “I’m so glad this is just a dream! I mean, there’s no way my body could take two pe-p-pe-pen … things … like that into the one body cavity at once! R-right?”

Luna looked away, blushing and pursing her lips together.

“…No.” Twilight whispered, eyes going as large as dinner-plates.

“It was … a different time, Twilight, and I was far more adventurous in the bedroom back then. And they were such caring Stallions, very careful to not go too deep or to crush me under their weight.” Luna finally managed to say, blushing down to her chest as she did. “And they had the tightest flanks you had ever seen. I couldn’t walk straight for a few days, but it was certainly a night to remember.”

“Oh sweet Faust on toast … I’m not going to have to do that, am I?”

“Goodness no, Twilight! Besides, considering how closely we’ve been … inspecting … each other over the past few days, what is before us is highly unlikely to happ … apapapapa … oh my.”

In the space of a few minutes, the trio had changed position again, the twins having completely withdrawn from the dream-Twilight and lay on their backs, loins pressed tightly together and slick shafts pointing up into the air, twitching and throbbing against one another as the dream-Twilight shakily got to her hooves and slowly lowered herself over the twinned, entwined shafts, groaning loudly as they impossibly disappeared into her to the median rings, the purple ‘dream doppleganger’ bouncing enthusiastically on her new ‘throne’ while Aloe and Lotus nibbled eagerly on the tips of her wings, grinding their gushing depths against one another eagerly as the dream-Twilight pounded herself up and down their shafts.

“Can we just go. Please. Right now, before this gets any more awkward.”

“Just a minute, Twilight, we need to probe a little deeper into this Dreamscape to discover who the Twins are suggesting. Their forms in this dream may be a subconscious quirk from hearing your request to meet actual hermaphrodites, and who knows who the actual hermaphrodite is?” Luna whispered, draping a wing over Twilight’s body and leaning down to nuzzle the side of the smaller Alicorn’s face. “Endure this, my dear. I am sure there is nothing more they can throw at you …”

“I see you have warmed up without us, Twilight.” A familiar voice boomed, causing Luna and Twilight to flinch and stare at each other in shock. “Truly, such lack of discipline! This calls for more … training!”

From some misty corner of the ‘dream room’, a dream-doppleganger of Luna appeared, a riding-crop levitating alongside her head, which was crowned with a small black cap set at a jaunty angle and her body adorned with some sort of strange, corset-like garment that left little to the imagination … including an impossibly huge dark-purple prick that almost extended past the dream-Luna’s front legs and almost as wide as a foal’s body, the flared head already dribbling a staggering amount of pre-cum that glistened on the floor beneath and behind the dream-Luna.

“Oh yes, Mistress Moon, I’m sure she’s almost loose enough for you to use!” The Spa-Twins said at once, giving a final thrust into the mewling dream-Twilight before slowly withdrawing, their entwined shafts pulling out with a loud wet pop, the flared heads almost pulling the dream-Twilight’s inner depths out with them.

Luna looked upon the scene with one cheek twitching uncontrollably, while Twilight had begun foaming at the mouth.

“You have done excellent work, my pets, but Twilight must remember who rules this harem! Tonight, I shall finally claim the path least travelled! Twilight Sparkle, PREPARE THINE ANUS!”

The doors to the dream-room slammed shut without a sound, leaving Twilight and Luna alone in the now-silent hallway that seemed to run through the Dreamscape, mercifully blocking out any further sights, sounds or smells from the room behind them.

“Ahem. Yes, well then. Perhaps we should try somepony closer to you? A friend, perhaps, somepony who is not quite so … hmm, yes. Let us be off.”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee …” Twilight Sparkle whimpered around the foam in her mouth in lieu of a response as Luna expanded and assumed her previous Astral form, gathering both Alicorns up in her luminous mane and tail and mercifully exiting the Dreamscape.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Rainbow.”

“Yeah.”

“Remind me to bucking kick Rarity in the teeth tomorrow.”

“Yeah. I’ll hold her down for you, even.”

Both Mares hissed in frustration under the soothing cold spray from the shower-head as they sought to relieve themselves from the burning heat inside them, hooves at work feverishly between their legs in the shower, blushing as much from the close quarters they found themselves in as the sound of Big Mac groaning next door as he ‘took care of business’ in his own way.

“Hey, at least the Crusaders are too young for this stuff to affect them … I think. You told them to go have a sleepover at their club-house, right?”

“Damn straight. Ah ain’t sure ah can hold myself back, Rainbow, an’ ah know Big Mac’s barely keepin’ control as is. He’d never forgive himself if’n this damn trick o’ Rarity’s made him attack his lil’ sis or her friends.”

“Why aphrodisiacs and not laxatives or fart-pills?” Rainbow whimpered, puller her hoof away and staring at the extremity with annoyance before reaching for a bottle of shampoo and started to tease her dripping opening with the head of the bottle. “This is just twisted! She knew Sweetie Bell would be here tonight!”

“Durn idjit must’ve had her brains rattled by mah punch. Ah’ll rattle her teeth down her throat an’ out her white … perky … silky-smooth aaaaaah Faust dammit! Rainbow, do me a favour an’ go to mah room!” Applejack’s threat turned into a lusty admiration, and then frustration. “There’s a … damn it! A box under mah bed, big pink box wit’ a lock on the side. S’got my toys in it, an’ we’ll need ‘em.”

“What … about … Mac?” Rainbow panted, having worked the head of the bottle inside herself and apparently was working her way up to taking the thicker ‘body’ of the bottle next.

“S’why ah’m sendin’ you, dummy! If’n he comes out an’ sees me wit’ mah ass in the air an’ mah flower in bloom, an’ both of us in this state, he’ll plow me like a spring field!”

“So risking my ass is fine, but yours isn’t?”

“If’n he gives you a ride, you’ll both get some relief. If’n he rides me, d’yah think mah brother an’ ah’ll be able to look each other in the eye afterwards?”

“AJ, I’ve seen Big Mac’s lil’ mac. That thing goes anywhere near me and I’ll end up with both legs in the air … in the hospital with a broken everything! And didn’t you two … you know …”

“That was one time, when we were both young an’ we got locked in the cider-cellar by accident right as ah was goin’ into mah first Estrus. Ain’t gonna be a repeat o’ that, Rainbow, both me an’ mah brother talked ‘bout it afterwards an’ agreed it weren’t healthy for either of us to keep it goin’.”

“There isn’t a law against it, AJ. And besides, taking a brother and sister to bed at the same time …” Applejack gave the now-grinning cyan-blue Pegasus a dirty look as the lithe flyer managed to work the first third of the shampoo bottle inside herself, twisting the smooth cylinder left, then right, a dopey smile on her face. “Kind of a turn-on, now that I think about it …”

“Ah was gonna offer to go down on you first if’n you took the risk an' went out first, but ah’ll pass this time.” The farm-mare groaned, stepping out from under the cold water and cursing immediately as the heat deep in her core came raging back to the surface, making her head swim and her loins pulse with need. “Ah’ll get the toys …”

“No … hurry …” Rainbow offered unhelpfully as she started to pump the shampoo bottle in and out of herself with piston-like thrusts, leaving a grumbling Applejack to shuffle out of the bathroom, shooting a nervous look towards her brother’s room, steam all but coming out of her ears as she heard the grunts and groans coming from the room grow in strength as he rubbed his massive hooves along and over his equally massive …

“AJ! AJ! Oh Faust, it’s so good, I can’t stop!”

“It don’t hurt no more, Mac! Keep goin’, ah feel like ah’m flyin’…”

“Ah can’t help it! It’s comin’ AJ! I’m gonna come inside!”

“Aw. Hell. Naw.” Applejack muttered to herself, flinching as she realized she’d taken several steps towards Big Mac’s door. Thankfully, free birth-control pills were as easy to get as pamphlets in the chemist-stores, bowls of them placed in every corner of the store near innocuous stands of other medical supplies, so that no awkward questions or requests were needed if a Pony had an unexpected encounter and wished to keep things a secret. And since everyday medication like cough medicine or tiger-balm were placed nearby, there was always a reasonable excuse for any Pony to be near the bowls.

They’d been young. Trapped in the cellar, in the heat, for almost an entire day before they’d managed to escape the cellar and slink down to the pond to wash away the physical traces of their union, but Applejack had made sure to go in and get some ointment for sore muscles, claiming it was due to strains acquired getting the cider stored away to ferment, when in-fact the ointment had been for sore muscles in other places. And her saddlebags had been loaded with almost half a bowl’s worth of the birth-control pills.

Wasn’t just once like you told Rainbow that one time she got you drunk enough to admit who popped your cherry, Applejack. Seven times a’fore you both wised up that it weren’t right for siblings to do that kinda thing, no matter how good you both felt. It was twistin’ us both up inside thinkin’ about what the family would say … an’ what if the pills failed, an’ ah’d gotten with foal? How would ah have explained that to Granny Smith? Or the rest of Ponyville?

Grunting as much from the rippling of her internal muscles as the grim thoughts plaguing her mind, Applejack snuck into her own room, looking around quickly as if expecting to have a paparatzi-pony spring forth from behind a piece of furniture to take a photo, and narrowed her eyes as she felt something was … off with the room.

“Somethin’s missin’ …” Applejack whispered to herself as she crouched down low, peering under the bed and grinning as she spotted the box, a giant pink shoe-box with the words “Private, stay out or DIE!” written on every available flat surface. “Don’t matter none, get these, get our heads cleared, go kill Rarity tomorrow.”

“AJ?”

Awwww. Heck. Naw.

“Mac.” Applejack said firmly, scooting around and planting her backside firmly ontop of the box she had just retrieved, blushing down to the base of her neck as she saw her brother standing just outside her door, covered with sweat and looking very ruffled, with a very large errection slapping against his belly … and a broadly-grinning Rainbow Dash peering out from behind the shower-curtain, furiously masturbating with the shampoo bottle and making ‘go on’ guestures with her wings since both front-legs were occupied. “Y’need to go back to your room.”

“Can’t. Need lube.” He grunted, nostrils flaring as he caught the scent of two needy mares. “The … ah ... ‘wife’ sprung a leak an' I don't have any patches for her. An’ I still ain’t … you know.”

“Maaaaac.” Applejack said with a warning tone as her brother took a step towards her, before the burly Stallion shook his head and shuffled backwards, flushing a red so deep it showed past his russet coat.

“OH JUST BUCK ALREADY!” Rainbow squealed with excited frustration from the bathroom, making both Apple Ponies flush and give her dirty looks.

“I can’t help it, AJ. I’m harder than hard-wood, an’ nothing else seems to work. Gonna either need the shower for myself, or …” Big Mac mumbled, coughing heavily as his flanks twitched and his engorged member slapped against his belly again, Applejack's eyes drawn to the thick meat that her body screamed at her would provide relief from this damnable heat.

“AJ! Again, I’m gonna come again!”

“Do it! Oh Faust, Mac, don’t pull out!”

“Dammit.” Applejack groaned, slapping a hoof over her eyes. “This’ll be a once-off, Mac, y’hear me. One night only. We all got an' itch that only the other can scratch, tha's all it is.”

“Mmmhm.” Big Mac nodded, taking a step towards Applejack’s room.

“But y’gonna start with Rainbow first.”

“Wha-huh?” Both Rainbow and Big Mac said in unison, giving each other startled looks.

“Ah’m gonna need a sec to find some pills, Mac. An’ Rainbow’s already been workin’ herself up into a lather. Start with her, an’ see if that helps a’fore we have to … y’know.”

“Wait wait waaaaait, don’t I get a say in … wuh-whoo! Big Mac, point that thing somewhere else!” Rainbow stammered, her eyes going huge as Big Mac shuffled into the bathroom, tail swishing behind him eagerly as he advanced on her and the shower. “I don’t think my heart’s ready for this!”

“Says the mare with a durn bottle shoved up there.” Applejack muttered to herself as she pulled the box out, ignoring the excited yammering from the bathroom that turned from stammering to giggles, whispers and the soft slap of flesh on flesh as she pulled a small box of bland white colouration out from the box, labelled with only a red circle around a simple representation of a seedling with a broad line through both.

“We gotta stop this.”

“Ah … know. It feels so good, but we’re … we’re not …”

“I love you sis. But this isn’t good for any of us.”

“You’re right, Mac. I just … wish we weren’t …”

“Me too, AJ. Me too …”

“Buck it.” Applejack muttered, popping the box open and swallowing several of the pills at once, swallowing them dry. “Just one more time … an’ tomorrow, all three of us go an’ have a chat with Rarity ‘bout this nonsense.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What?”

“You … took the order, right Mr Cake? Rarity ordered a cake for Applejack as thanks for looking after the Cutiemark Crusaders tonight.” Lyra explained, looking at the Cakes as if they’d grown a second head, given the horrified expressions on their faces. “Rainbow Dash offered to take the cake over, she even said the Cutiemark Crusaders would love it. Why? What’s wrong.”

“Oh dear sweet Filly Faust on a park swing.” Mr Cake groaned, falling to his knees, while his portly wife turned pale and wobbled on her hooves. “Honey, what have we done?”

“Lyra … just … just go home. We’ve made a mistake with the cake, that’s all. So … thank you for today, we’ll make sure we chip in a good bonus for your work, and the hours you hung back to help us clean up …” Mrs Cake smiled weakly, blinking rapidly as Lyra waved a hoof in-front of her husband’s face. “Just … please keep this quiet, would you dear? Please? We may have accidentally put Applejack into a terrible position.”

“Oh please, that mare can take a licking and keep on kicking, I’m sure there’s nothing that cake can dish out that she can’t take!” Lyra scoffed.

“It’s the licking I’m worried about ... and the kicking part, now that I think about it.” Mr Cake groaned, turning as pale as his wife. “Honey, maybe we should drop the foals off to your parents tonight. I’m … not sure they should be here tomorrow when the Apples come to talk to us about the … creamy filling.”

“Oh dear, that’s is going to be uncomfortable …” Mrs Cake muttered in turn, both bakers ignoring the puzzled expression on Lyra’s face.

“Uh, yeah, okay I guess. Take care … good night?”

“Good night.” The Cakes replied mechanically as Lyra left their bakery, sharing a look of sick horror before the bell on the inside of the door jingled as somepony else opened the door.

“Hey Mrs Cake! Hey Mr Cake!” Pinkie Pie shouted happily, staggering into the bakery with bags under her eyes a satisfied grin on her face. “You’ll never guess what happened to me today!”

Chapter 41 (Clop Heavy)

CHAPTER 41

“I can’t believe you talked us into this!”

“Ah can’t believe you’re STILL whinin’ ‘bout it!”

“Open! Up! Dammit!”

Sweetie Belle tried not to scowl at Applebloom, fighting down the surge of reckless irriration that seemed to be gripping all of them as Scootaloo bashed at the lock with a rock, tail lashing in the air with each strike.

Something was wrong, and it wasn’t the theft of the box. Applejack had gone from smotheringly over-protective to all but demanding the Crusaders go and have a sleep-over in their tree-fort, and Big Mac had shut himself up in his room right after dinner and refused to come out. Even Rainbow Dash had become distant and awkward …

She wasn’t entire sure what the problem was. Sure, Applejack had been more than hard on Applebloom today, possibly cruel even, but then again the Crusaders had accidentally set the entire city hall on fire, though Sweetie Belle was certain that nopony but themselves knew about that … and Princess Celestia herself had come to town and fought some sort of evil pony that had almost hurt Twilight and Applejack …

Why was everything so damn hot … and itchy! It made thinking so hard!

“Stupid ... thing!” Scootaloo cursed, slamming the rock down hard on the lock and flinching back as the stone broke in half … and the padlock remained stubbornly intact, not even scratched or scuffed. “What if this scroll is the answer to our crusades? Why does Twilight have to have such a strong protection spell on the box if it’s just a stupid spell-scroll?”

“Cause it’s Twilight’s spell-scroll, you goof!” Sweetiebelle snapped, turning away from Applebloom and telekinetically snatching the pieces of rock away from her Pegasus friend, and then levitated the locked box up into the air and towards herself, tugging heavily on the padlock that was the source of the argument. “This is the same mare that has tracking runes on every single book in her library, the same unicorn who levitated an Ursa Minor out of Ponyville on her own! I hardly think that a rock is going to …”

Click

All three young ponies looked in shock at the box, and the lock that had just popped off latching mechanism, the loop at the top of the padlock still hooked through the latch.

“Apparently Twilight can make mistakes!” Scootaloo yelled triumphantly, shooting Sweetiebelle a look of smug victory. “Like using a cheap gryphon-made padlock!”

“That was a fluke!” Sweetie Belle shot back, levitating the chest just outside of Scootaloo’s reach for several seconds before, apparently overcome by the same strange sense of frustration that Sweetie Belle was feeling so strongly, the Pegasus tried to tacke the Unicorn to the ground.

Jumping in surprise at the attack, Sweetie Belle scrambled to the side and narrowly missed the clumsy tackle, although the same could not be said for the seated Applebloom, the two fillies tumbling to the ground, grappling and insulting each other loudly as the Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes and focused her efforts on tugging the lid of the chest open.

“What the hay, you idjit?”

“I wasn’t aiming for you, you twit!”

“Well’n your aim’s as bad as your flying!”

“S-shut up, you apple-headed dummy!”

“Overgrown chicken!”

“Fat-flank!”

“Feather-butt!”

“Girls!” Sweetie Belle snapped, groaning as the two struggling fillies completely ignored her and started rolling around vigorously, reduced to muffled grunts and strained noises. What is with everypony today?

Ignoring the other two and knowing full well they’d stop fighting well short of doing anything other than a few bruises and sore manes, Sweetie Belle sighed and turned her attention back to the chest, finally managing to get the lid open and to pry this mysterious ‘spell-scroll’ out of the velvet-lined interior.

Almost a foot thick when rolled up, the spell-scroll smelled like dust, books and, of all things, cinnamon as Sweetie Belle levitated it out of the box and started to open up the scoll, eyes flashing with excitement as she gazed upon the first few words …

I, Twilight Sparkle, have attempted a translation of Weeaboo the Sage’s original Spell-Scrolls, with the intent of preserving the work of a much-overlooked Pony whose grasp of transmutation and transmogrification spells should have earned him a much larger, and grander, place in the history of the world.

Whatever you may feel about the nature of the spells contained within, I believe we should all be in awe of the grasp of magical theory that is behind his work, an understanding of the laws of magical conservation and the principles of matter-conversion and creation that was many centuries ahead of other ‘experts’ whom came later on and proclaimed themselves the front-runners in the race to understand such arts.

Dear Twin-Stars, Dazzling Brook and Goldenlocks … you weren’t the first to discover such magical theories, you just had better press than the Sage did.

That said, Weeaboo the Sage was isolated to his island home for a reason, and while I personally feel this was an act of cruelty, history has shown that …

“Bor-ring!” Sweetie Belle muttered, unrolling the scroll faster and ignoring the preface as the grunting and wrestling from behind her became louder and more energetic. “Girls, keep it down, I’m trying to read here!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Applebloom wasn’t entirely sure why she felt the need to pin Scootaloo to the floor, but the hot, itchy feeling crawling under her skin seemed to subside slightly when she was in full-contact with Scootaloo’s squirming body, and she knew she was stronger than the Pegasi.

Of course, that didn’t mean she was trying to hurt Scootaloo, but she had to make the other filly stop fighting, stop trying to hurt Sweetie Belle … but for some reason, Applebloom found herself locked with Scootaloo in a wrestling hold, yet unable to finish the lock and force her irate friend to tap out.

“Get … mrrrrfff … off!” Scootaloo hissed, twisting left and right under Applebloom, grappling with the slightly larger Earth Pony, ineffectively trying to either roll Applebloom over or buck her off, the fuzzy-headed filly wasn’t entirely sure.

When Scootaloo’s hips bucked up, however, Applebloom found herself giving a short grunt of surprise as the Pegasi’s hips smacked into her own, and something incredible happened, like lightning shooting through her crotch, all the way up her spine and into her brain.

Scootaloo let out a similar noise, going rigid under Applebloom before giving a startled squeak of surprise.

Arching her back to try and see what had happened, guiltily without removing herself from whatever conjunction had happened and finding Scootaloo doing the same, both Fillies craned their necks to stare between their bodies, foreheads pressed together with their eyes bulging in shock, where they had become joined at the junction of soft fur between their hind legs.

And faintly visible were two small, flared ‘beads’ that were squashed against each other in the middle two damp patches of said fur, the source of the pleasurable shock both crusaders had just felt.

“What the …” Applebloom hissed softly, eyes going wide as she realized that somehow the ‘tuck’ spell that all Ponies were taught shortly after learning how to walk and talk must have come undone, and with her mind consumed with that itchy, hot feeling, she hadn’t noticed!

Scootaloo muttered something under her breath, whimpered and jerked her hips again, the two small beads grinding against one another before both crusaders flinched and pulled back, eyeing each other nervously.

A line had been crossed here. A pair of furtive glances towards Sweetie Belle confirmed she was engrossed in the scroll, and then they looked at each other, biting their bottom lips in nervousness and confusion.

“Wha’ … wha’ was that?” Applebloom hissed softly, blushing as she saw Scootaloo’s small wings extended under the prone Pegasi.

“I think we just became … what does Rainbow Dash call it? Friends with bonafides? Breakfast? I don’t remember.”

“Does this mean ah have to make you breakfast?”

“Well, you did make me dinner … sort of.”

“S-s-so what do we do next then?” Applebloom whispered, stammering in her nervousness.

“Well, we could … you know?” Scootaloo whispered back, wiggling underneath Applebloom and making both Crusaders flinch and whimper at the strange sensations assaulting them.

“Bu-but Sweetie is right th-uuuhn, Faust!” Applebloom’s quiet protests were lost as something down-south moved in a very interesting way, her hips moving on instinct as she rolled them against Scootaloo’s own hesitant thrusts, the two barely able to keep their voices down as they awkwardly, eagerly moved against each other, new to the experience they were sharing.

Thre were butterflies in her stomach, a pleasant tenseness in her spine and tingles of pleasure she’d never felt before, not even on the rare occasions she’d experimented with her own hooves, rushing through Applebloom as she rubbed herself against Scootaloo, who was biting one hoof and using the other to hold Applebloom’s hind-quarters firmly against her own, the knowledge that there was another Pony in the room just a few paces away and that they needed to be quiet slowly becoming less and less of an issue as the hot, itchy feeling began to spread through-out her body, the urge to drop her face closer to Scootaloo’s and …

“What in the hay are you two doing?”

Applebloom jerked her head away from the prone, whimpering Pegasi under her, staring at Sweetie Belle, who sat with one hoof pressed to her mouth … and the other rubbing furiously between her hind-legs.

“What in the hay are you doing?” Applebloom shot back, blushing furiously as the shock cleared her head a little. Ah was pressin’ mah coochie ‘gainst Scoot’s … Sweetie’s diddlin’ herself …

“I … I was just trying to …”

“H-hey. Why’d you sto-ooooooh buck me! Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo squeaked in alarm, her face going from a saucy, half-lidded mask of pleasure to a pale-faced one of shock and horror.

“I WAS TRYING TO DO JUST THAT, BUT APPLEBLOOM WOULDN’T GET OFF YOU!” Sweetie Belle shouted back, then shoved both hooves into her mouth in horror, then her eyes bulged and she spat the one that had just been incredibly intimate with her loins back out and started to retch.

Trying desperately to kick her brain out of the tangle of thoughts that seemed to always circle back to somehow rutting one or both of her friends, not helped by the squirming Scootaloo underneath her who was loudly trying to tell Sweetie Belle it was okay, they had all night while simultaneously rubbing her flared nub against Applebloom’s own, nor by Sweetie Belle who was now licking the ‘offending’ hoof with a curious expression on her face, Applebloom did the only thing she could think of.

“So … uhm … did’ja find anythin’ in the scroll that we can use?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Is there truly no sane Pony in this town?” Luna spluttered, closing the ‘door’ on the next dream, the cackling of the new and profoundly insane absolute-monarch of Carrot-topia oversaw the breeding of her new Apple-Clan servants atop a mound of lewdly-vibrated orange vegetables from which her kingdom’s name sprung ringing in the two Alicorns’ ears.

“I am fairly certain that, no matter how hard they try, Big Mac can’t get Braeburn pregnant.” Twilight muttered, blushing furiously as the two Alicorns left that dreamscape and floating up and away into the ethereal sky.

“Although it was fun to watch for a while, no?” Luna teased, nudging the much-smaller astral form of Twilight with a thick strand of her mane. “Up until Carrot Top decided carrots needed to be inserted into every possible orifice?”

“Nnnngh. I am never eating carrots again … or at least not Ponyville carrots. Faust only knows what she does to them …” The smaller Alicorn sighed in respond, grabbing onto the blazing strands of astral mane and pulling herself closer to Luna’s larger form. “Well, we’ve been to Mayor Mare’s dream and found out she lives in terror of me not assuming full and total control of the town, Filthy Rich has fantasies about being a potato-farmer and nightmares about Diamond Tiara becoming a Princess, and I don’t even want to think about what we saw in Derpy’s mind.”

“I don’t know, living in an phone-booth that’s bigger on the inside than the outside that can also time-travel, with a husband who keeps getting kidnapped by giant, sentient pears wearing what looks like armored salt-and-pepper shakers, and said husband needs me to rescue him by throwing muffins and sticks of butter at his enemies seems a pleasant enough fantasy to me.”

“The other dreams at least made sense! Derpy’s just … I don’t … I can’t ...”

“Twilight, dreams are not supposed to make sense. They are reflections of our conscious thoughts, warped parodies of our desires, half-understood impulses and needs. The conscious mind cannot handle everything that it encounters and experiences, and thus the sub-conscious mind takes it all and turns it into dreams, allowing the dreamer to work through their stress in a safe place.” The Lunar Princess explained as the two Alicorns followed their silver cords back to their bodies at the library, to check on themselves before heading out for ‘dream-watching’ again. “Most of the time, this is all a Pony needs to help maintain a healthy mind, but sometimes, situations occur in which this natural method does not work. Magic, extra-planar entities like the Nightmare Spirits or even just hormonal imbalances can cause this natural method of resolving the complexities of the mind to twist upon itself, causing nightmares, or worse, madness.”

“It was for this reason that I was called to Ascend, Twilight.” Luna continued as the silvery air around them parted like waves before the bow of a ship. “I do not know exactly how Celestia or Cadence Ascended, but I can tell you that because of my ability to enter the Astral Plane and fight against the Nightmares, to help bring peace and comfort to the dreamers of all races, that I was taken by the Powers and given the opportunity to Ascend.”

“I … wasn’t given a choice.” Twilight said softly after several moments of silence. “I was just pulled into a strange place, a little like this but … brighter? Less surreal? And Celestia pulled something out of my chest, then changed it and pushed it back in …”

“As was I, but it was another who helped mold my spirit for the Ascension, not Celestia … but before then, you weren’t given a choice? Between yourself and others?” Luna asked, smiling cheekily at her lover. “No split-second decision, with no time to think on your options?”

“I …” The purple princess began, words dying off in her mouth as she recalled the moment of her ‘death’.

Finally, the girls are okay. I’ve put things to right!

Then the panic as the Elements had ‘turned’ on her, activating of their own accord, bathing her in the energies of Harmony, a sensation not unlike being teleported, but somehow both grander and more terrifying …

Looking around in shock, seeing the horrified looks on her friends’ faces, and then …

I accepted it. My friends would be okay, the power was all flowing towards me, not them, and the clash of power would be driven away from them, judging from the angles the beams were hitting me at. They’d live, they’d be okay, and that was all I wanted.

“I made a choice between my friends and myself. I … had fixed the mistake I’d made, and I thought the Elements were punishing me for my sins.” Twilight finally managed to say, shaking softly as more and more of Luna’s flaming mane wrapped around her, holding her tightly, keeping her safe. “I knew somehow all the power was being funnelled into me, and I knew, somehow, if I tried to get away, the girls would bear the brunt of the blast.”

“Cruel as it may sound to you now, Twilight, that was the final test, a gamble to see if you could Ascend or not. Celestia had to force you into making a choice between them and yourself, you see, since every adventure you’d been on since you purified myself, you were able to beat without real incident, and to be considered worthy to Ascend by the Powers, you must make a choice, between protecting yourself by sacrificing others or to protect others by sacrificing yourself.” The Lunar Princess explained slowly as they drifted down, closer towards the earth, closer towards where their sleeping bodies lay. “After you purged the Nightmare Spirit from my flesh, from my mind and spirit, Celestia has been in quiet awe of you. Normally, it takes centuries at the very least for a race to manifest multiple Ascendants, yet here you were, just a few years younger than the last Ascended of our Tribes, raised and trained under her very wing, and she’d never even realized it. No doubt Celestia’s head was spinning at the implications, such a thing is completely unprecedented, even the other Immortals were stunned by the revelation.”

“OTHER IMMORTALS?”

“I will discuss them another time, and yes, dearest Twilight, it shall require many belly-rubs! Back onto our topic, however. Your role in matters, as far as Celestia could understand from the Prophecies, was to help bring me back into balance. My return from her hasty banishment spell was nigh, and Celestia, my dear, foolish, sentimental sister, was determined that she would not only release me from the vile possession I suffered, but do so without having to destroy me and put me back on the cycle of reincarnation and lose me again until I could reconstitute my physical form.”

“However, consider that the Elements should simply have separated the Nightmare Spirit from my mind and body, and then Celestia would have swooped in to battle it, or did you think her timely arrival after the Rainbow of Harmony was unleashed was just luck? No, instead you completely derailed her plans when you were able to utilize the powers of Harmony to purify the Nightmare Spirit, Twilight, and were crowned by the Powers as a result. The signs were there, the Element of Magic itself became your tiara, your crown, and Celestia told me later on that when she communed with the Powers over how this could be, she was chided and told to stop trying to think an Immortal a mere five thousand years old could know how things were ‘supposed’ to be.”

“So, you mean the Elements of Harmony aren’t normally that powerful?” The purple princess whispered, staring at the distant mountain where Canterlot perched, a gleaming collection of spires and white marble.

“They are incredibly powerful, Twilight, they are fragments of the Powers themselves, capable of moving mountains or boiling seas if they were so inclined, but they are passive and more inclined to heal than harm. You will note that you alone received a crown, while your comrades received torcs instead, when you wielded them against Nightmare Moon? Celestia had known you bore the physical traits of one who possessed the ability to Ascend, but with Cadence’s own Ascension so recently finished, she believed it was just a random chance that such a potent Pony appeared before her.”

“Traits?” The youngest Alicorn repeated, blinking as she tried to absorb the flow of information. Celestia was throwing me and my friends into danger to try and get me to sacrifice myself for them? That … cannot be right! Luna must have misunderstood, she must be mistaken! But it does explain why we were sent out, rather than the Royal Guard …

“Did you never notice? Or was it, I wonder, because you never had any friends until later in life that you never even considered the situation?” Luna chuckled again, a strand of her luminous hair poking Twilight’s cheek playfully. “Did the absurdity of a bookish librarian who did no physical exercise except climb ladders and stairs and go shopping somehow manage to keep up with an extremely physical group of ponies that include Applejack and Rainbow Dash, two of the most physically-capable Ponies I have seen outside of the Royal Guard?”

“…I … just thought it was normal!” Twilight stammered in response, eyes going wide as her mind slowly put the pieces into place. “I mean the average Earth Pony will always be physically stronger than the average Unicorn, and the average Pegasi will be faster than either, but I just thought that we all were just … average.”

“The great secret of the Alicorns, Twilight, is that we are all hybrids. I was born a Thestral, but a mutation caused my wings to be covered with feathers, like the distant Pegasi whom had, at that time, not crossed the Dragonspine Mountains to the north, yet I was not the only Thestral who had been born so … ‘cursed’. Cadence was born a Pegasi, but shortly before puberty developed the horn of a Unicorn, or at least that is what we tell the media, but in truth she had been born with a horn, it just remained dormant until she started to Ascend, and only came out fully when she proved herself worth to the Powers and became a full Ascendant, yet history is rife with ‘Pegicorns’, so-called ‘Lesser’ Princesses and Princes whom have tried to claim a link to the Royal Thrones, for good or ill.”

“You, Twilight Sparkle, are a hybrid of Earth Pony and Unicorn. I suspect that if you hadn’t become such an avid bookworm and played with the other students as a youth, you would have been the star of many a sport that required physical stamina and strength. Or did you never wonder why it was so easy for you to keep up with other Ponies who were so much more physically active than yourself.”

“But … my mother’s side of the family is pure Unicorn, and my father’s side of the family is almost all Unicorns with maybe a few Pegasi and Earth Pony ancestors!” Twilight protested weakly, feeling utterly confused and lost by the flow of information she had received. And the knowledge that Princess Celestia, the paragon of all she had considered ‘good’, and been willingly throwing six ponies and one baby dragon into potentially lethal encounters just to force an Ascension was throwing Twilight’s thought-process off the deep end.

“Those who may Ascend can be of the purest bloodlines, Twilight, and still be hybrids. The Powers are annoyingly stubborn like that, in that they either don’t give a damn about, or cannot comprehend, the social customs or theological beliefs or whatever other constraints Mortals are wont to put upon themselves. If something needs to be done to bring balance, they will make it so, and too bad for anything that gets in the way of their work or that may be derailed in the process.”

“One does not ‘become’ an Immortal unless the Powers will it be so, Twilight.” Luna said firmly, a sad note to her voice as they hovered over another house, this one belonging to a white coated, blue-maned Unicorn that Twilight remembered was called ‘Vinyl Scratch’. “One is ‘chosen’ for the role by the Powers, by primal forces not even the greatest of Immortals would dare challenge, and it is a role of sacrifice for the greater good for which we are chosen. We are not called upon as a reward for our service, but to give service, to rise up and be both example for those we Ascended from, and the shield to protect our people from harm, both within their own ranks and without.”

“You make it sound like a burden …” Twilight murmured as Luna’s mane wrapped around them, preparing to take the two Alicorns into the next dream-scape.

“It can be, Twilight, but the Powers are not merciless or uncaring. The Immortals have each other, and we have our people, our Ponies, to love, to care for and protect.” Luna whispered back, nuzzling the top of Twilight’s head affectionately as the last of the strands of her flaming mane cocooned them, slowly starting to spin around the pair of Alicorns. “We may be chosen for the role of guardians and protectors, but the Powers also make sure those chosen are prepared for their role, and rewarded for their sacrifices, although they are so far removed from our level of reality, and our way of thinking, such rewards can take a very, very long time to arrive, and may be something we never knew we needed.”

In the glow of Luna’s ethereally-blazing mane, the Lunar Princess’s muzzle split with a wicked grin as she shifted her head slightly to whisper saucily into Twilight’s ear. “Perhaps my reward for fighting the horrors of the Nightmares and their corruption on my own for so long was waking up with my horn welded to the one belonging to my sister’s adorable apprentice and sparking each other silly by accident.”

“LUNAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

“Oh hush, you loved it too.”

Chapter 42 (Clop Heavy)

CHAPTER 42

Rainbow Dash wasn’t the sort of Mare to be shy about her passions.

The Wonderbolts. Fresh Apple family apple-cider. Daring Do books. Being awesome. Practicing and perfecting her aerial stunts. Sex in general.

So when she found herself with a mouthful of her own hoof, desperately try to not cry out as Big Mac slowly pulled out of her again, it felt a little bizarre to her. She’d been living on her own for so long that the thought of being quiet for the sake of others was almost a foreign concept until a few minutes into their first round, Big Mac had begged her to keep it down for the sake of Granny Smith, whose bedroom was right below the bathroom.

And where in bucking Tartarus is Applejack? Rainbow thought dimly, eyes bulging and a half-muffled groan escaping past her hoof as the burly Stallion ontop of her slowly, agonizingly slowly, sheathed himself inside her again, his own moan partially muffled by the mouthful of her mane he tugged on with every thrust, sending a thrill down the Pegasus’s spine in addition to the wonderful feeling of fullness and the electric tingle in her loins. Is she getting off on watching her brother plow me like a damn field?

Not that Big Mac was bad at ‘plowing’, as Rainbow’s weak knees and tingling body could attest. Not only was he prodigiously endowed, the Stallion knew how to work everything he had, and most of what Rainbow had if she was being truly honest with herself, for maximum effect. They could have been doing this for minutes, or hours, she’d lost track of time and had given up on counting her own orgasms at this point! She’d expected a frenzied rutting, but here was Big Mac, treating her like she was a virgin, and Faust as her witness, Rainbow Dash was loving every second, and inch, of it!

Aphrodisiacs in the cake be damned, if she’d known Big Mac could be like this in the sack, she’d have jumped his bones years ago, regardless of if Fluttershy had a crush on him or not!

The only thing that could have made this better would have been Applejack below her, the farm-pony licking and nuzzling away at Rainbow’s nethers while the Pegasus muffled her cries in the crotch of the orange farm-pony. Yet somehow, despite the show, her friend remained painfully absent.

What the buck? Applejack, where are you?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that, Zecora. I hope they didn’t offend you?” Fluttershy said quietly, flipping a new set of hot rocks onto the thick towels on the Zebra’s back, the currently homeless Shaman groaning appreciatively as the heat loosened up the bruises and tight muscles the disasterous day had delivered to her.

“As happy as I am to share the ways of my people, I fear the next time the Crusaders ask, I’ll ask them in turn to go jump over a steeple! Their rhyming was atrocious, their potions a peril, their fascination with pictures on their butts most un’corte'il!” The Shaman muttered softly, stretching out and savouring the pleasure of somepony else tending to her for a change.

“Errr … ‘unicateril’? I’m sorry, is that even a word?” The Pegasi offered after an awkward moment of silence.

“A word it is, but its meaning is vile, my apologies, Fluttershy, for speaking so crude.” Zecora explained, giving the ever-shy Pony a small smile. “This one often slips into her mother’s tongue when she wishes to be rude!”

“Oh, I don’t mind, really … I’m not as delicate as people assume, I just … don’t like confrontations.” Fluttershy giggled, using the tips of her flight-feathers to tickle down the Zebra’s flanks, making the battered shaman squirm and beg for mercy. “You know what I do for a living, after all … and thank you for not telling anyone, while we’re on the subject.”

“As I told Rarity, not from Equestria is this Mare, the silly hang ups your ponies have I do not share.”

“Well, I’m just glad the girls didn’t get into the, uh, root-cellar. I really don’t want to explain why I’m storing all those things under my roo-“

BANG BANG BANG BANG!

Fluttershy squeaked in alarm at the sudden pounding on her front door, and following her usual reaction, tried to drop down and hide.

Except she was massaging a very sore and tired Zebra, who had hot rocks and warm towels on her back, neither of which were prepared to a Pegasi dropping down ontop of them, nor was Fluttershy prepared for the hot rocks to press into her fur and burn her.

“Aiiieeeee!”

“Gah, my ribs! Fluttershy, what gives?”

“FLUTTERSHY? IS ZECORAAAAAH! IS ZECORA THERE? AH NEED HER HELP!” A familiar voice, Applejack’s, roared from the other side of the door, followed by more heavy pounding that the startled Pegasi was convinced was going to shake her cottage down around her ears.

Squeaking in alarm at both the light burns and the sudden shock, Fluttershy froze up, rolling off Zecora and coming to rest on her back on the floor, limbs clutched to her torso and eyes tightly clenched shut. Zecora groaned, awkward getting to her hooves and letting the hot rocks and towels slip off her back and onto the couch, and limped towards the door, opening it just in time to nearly get pounded in the head by one of Applejack’s hooves.

“Applejack, dearest friend, why are you at your wit’s end?” The Zebra said loudly, glaring at the orange-coated Farm-pony, who was prancing from side to side, tail lashing in the air, eyes all but rolling in their sockets. “And why are you lathered like you’ve just run a race? Is Granny Smith okay, have the Crusaders played with mace?”

“N-n-need yuh help, Zecora! Aphrooooohidisac, hidden in the cake, ah’m burnin’ up, need a cure.” The Farm-pony shuddered and stuttered, and the Zebra took a step back as she finally caught the scent of another Mare very much in need. “Puh-please, ah’m losin’ mah mind, ca-ca-can’t go back, mah brother’s also got it in him, can’t let him plow me, plleeeeeease he-help!”

“My house is in ruins, my potions all out of power, I fear the best I can offer is a very cold shower.” The Zebra explained, taking another step backwards as Applejack’s jittering became far more pronounced.

“Dea-deal!” The Farm-pony shouted, shoving past Zecora and rushing towards the small bathroom at the back of the cottage, leaping over the still-paralyzed Fluttershy in the process.

“A strange story this will be, and the particulars I will find out.” Zecora muttered, limping back to Fluttershy to try to shake the shy Pegasi out of her ‘frozen’ state, wincing as her hoof landed with a loud splorch in a wet patch on the living-room rug that hadn’t been there a minute ago. “And new floor-coverings we need, because I don’t think that will wash out.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Canterlot always was beautiful at night.” Dappled Light and Twilight Glimmer both did a double-take at the wistful tone the Changeling Queen used as the train trundled down the lines, heading towards the center of the rail-system that connected most of Equestria via the steam-locomotive. “Especially in the winter, when the air is cool and clear, and you could see the stars clearly …”

“Errmmm … but wasn’t Princess Mi Amore Cadenza’s wedding in the summer?” Twilight Glimmer asked after several moments of sharing startled looks with Dappled, who was holding an ice-pack to each ear after a long day of them being ravaged by three teething foals and a strangely vengeful Scout, who had fallen asleep a short while ago and was now leaning and drooling against the window “Do you mean you and your Hive were in Canterlot for months?”.

“Under normal circumstances I would not answer that question, but given that I must throw myself and my Hive at your hooves for mercy, I suppose personal pride and the secrets of my kind must come second to all other considerations.” The Queen sighed heavily, tugging the thick woollen blanket tighter around her body and the three foals between her legs, nestled against her milk-heavy breasts in blissfully quiet slumber. “The so-called ‘invasion’ was an improvisation, put into play with only a few days of planning when I realized that Celestia would be distracted by playing the doting matriarch at the wedding, and thus vulnerable enough that I could risk attacking her openly, rather than keeping up the pretense of being ‘Princess Cadence’ and working my way through her defences over several more months.”

“My Hive and I had spent the better part of six decades hiding amongst the Ponies of Equestria before that day, and I am ashamed to admit that it took us a good three years to re-infiltrate Canterlot without letting your Royal Guards or the various Noble Families become aware of our actions, but being able to feed on the ambient love the citizens felt towards their Princess, as well as the countless multitudes in which my Drones and Soldiers could hide amongst, was the only reason so many of my children could gather together without risk of starvation.”

Twilight Glimmer performed a slow blink, mind whirling as she tried to fathom how the Royal Guards of Canterlot, the so-called Elite of the Elite, could have possibly missed such a large gathering of individuals just randomly appearing despite the exhaustive cenus records at their command, let alone the living space necessary to hold five thousand individuals in a cramped city like Canterlot!

“I was actually aiming to subdue Celestia, you see, knock her unconscious, put her in a cocoon, tap into all that raw power and learn how she moved the sun and moon and become the strongest force on the continent, strong enough to make even the Elder Queens balk at attempting to march across the Badlands to besiege us. Taking the delectable Shining Armor as my own consort and imprisoning the other two Princesses was just happy circumstances, at least for my Hive and I. We had come to Canterlot when my kind first made our escape across the Badlands, hoping to strike an alliance of some sort, but all I found was an Immortal with absolute power and the capacity to hold the entire world to ransom hamstringing herself to appear ‘fair’ and ‘just’ to a pack of spoiled fools who allegiance fell no further than pointless material wealth or spiteful feuding.” The Changeling Queen explained, her large green eyes drifting back to the illuminated spires of Canterlot with a wistful expression on her face.

“Back when my kind first managed to sneak across your border, which I will admit was criminally easy back then, I must admit, it took us perhaps six or seven years to understand the absurdities of your society, even with the benefits of placing Ponies into cocoons to read their minds. All the while, I was trying to figure out if I should reveal myself and my Hive to your beloved Princess and try to make an alliance given that most of those we cocooned believed she was literally the incarnation of compassion, tolerance and second chances, or if I should risk personal combat against a God and attempt to replace her myself, or perhaps even if it would be safest if I risked uproot the few children who survived our trek across the Badlands and try to flee across the ocean.” Chrysalis continued, a sour expression appearing on her face. “In the end, I decided to keep my Hive small and mobile to avoid any future exposures and moved around Equestria for a few decades after a group of Ponies belonging to some sort of secret cult uncovered our original Hive in Canterlot and threatened to expose us to the Ponies of the city as horrible Pony-devouring monstrosities if we didn’t help them overthrow Princess Celestia.”

“Five thousand Changelings is what you consider small and mobile?” Dappled squeaked, eyes going wide in surprise.

“Wait, you’re saying somepony discovered your Hive and tried to blackmail you into helping them unseat Princess Celestia from the Solar Throne?” Twilight Glimmer spluttered, at once enraged at the revelation and horrified that somewhere, somehow, somepony has discovered the Changelings and not told anyone for the past sixty years. And worst of all, these were citizens of Celestia’s own seat of power who were plotting against the Pony who could move the sun around at will.

“No, Dappled, I consider five thousand Changelings a tiny amount. My Hive once boasted fifty thousand members, back before the … our mother found fault with us and ordered the complete extermination of my kind. And yes, Glimmer, hence yet another reason for my desperately low opinion of your species. The very concept of striving against your Queen, I’m sorry, your term is ‘Princess’ isn’t it, is so alien, so offensive to my kind that it took all my willpower to stop my Drones and Soldiers from tearing the foolish Ponies apart on the spot. A potential rival and threat to our existence Princess Celestia might have been, but the very concept of a Hive’s members turning on each other for personal gain is as close to blasphemy as my kind gets.” The Changeling Queen’s expression turned harsh and bitter as her eyes narrowed and glared at Canterlot, perched on the mountainside like a sleeping Dragon. “Had I known she would throttle her power to avoid killing all those wastes of oxygen in the room when we duelled at the Princess of the Endless Buffet’s wedding, I would have taken her place decades ago and put the heads of those Ponies on pikes atop the walls of Canterlot to remind Ponies that unlike your weak-willed, squeamish Sun-Goddess, I do not tolerate traitors and selfish fools.”

“Well that’s charming.” Dappled grunted, shooting the withered Changeling Queen a dirty look. “Leaving aside the whole ‘severed heads on the battlements’ part, you are claiming you’d fry your own Changelings, your own family, if it secured you victory?”

“All Changelings, from the meekest Drone up to a Queen such as myself, are connected through the Hive Mind. Had I a need to expend such power, they would known to run, or failing that, be prepared to sacrifice themselves for the good of the Hive. We are not like you Ponies, you selfish, individualstic creatures who are constantly working against each other for personal gain and satisfaction, for meaningless concepts such as ‘money’ and ‘social status’. For my kind, every action is taken for the good of the Hive, for the preservation of the family because what affects one of us affects us all.” The battered Queen retorted, giving the Border-Guard a dirty look of her own. “The loss of a Changeling is a terrible blow to the Hive, but their memories live on within the Hive-Mind, and new Changelings will be born with access to those memories, being shaped and nurtured by them. Especially strong-willed Changelings are capable of sustaining their consciousness, their sense of self, within the Hive-Mind and may eventually possess a new form if a Queen can produce and mature a hatchling in time.”

“And the fact that there’s only one Queen per Hive means your own existence is too important to be lost, so the rest of the Changelings put their lives on the line to protect yours. How … lucky for you.” Glimmer muttered darkly, shooting a look of pity towards the sleeping, drooling Scout.

“Luck has nothing to do with it, Captain Glimmer. Under normal circumstances, Changelings of all castes naturally avoid outright combat as we were never designed to be frontline combatants like our Elder kin, but experience has taught the Hive to try to keep multiple stockpiles of royal jelly nearby the Hive’s lairs to induce the change from Drone to Queen should the current Queen fall in battle or to misadventure, if that’s what you’re implying. I am no less willing to lay down my life for the Hive than any other Changeling, but I would prefer to be there to raise and nurture the new Queen and see her grown and prepared to form her own Hive, rather than leave her to flounder alone in enemy territory and thus risk the absolute destruction of what little remains of our species.” Chrysalis shot back before coughing into her hoof and shifting awkwardly in her seat. “With any luck, the stash of Royal Jelly I produced before the whole wedding debacle may still be in Canterlot, and I can use them to induce the change in my two little princesses here …”

Glimmer’s mind skipped a gear, missing the conversation for several seconds as she replayed the Queen’s comment in her mind.

We were never designed to be frontline combatants … we were never designed to be … does she mean there was a breeding program? Are these ‘Elder Queens’ that Chrysalis is so terrified of that she’d throw herself at Equestria’s mercy of a different breed, like the difference between a Draft Horse and a Courser, or is it something more pronounced?

The officer’s mind whirled with the implications, and her stomach twisted at the thought of a nation or group of powerful mages out somewhere beyond Equestria who possessed both the magic and the drive to create an entirely new species as complex as the Changelings as well as hostile intentions towards her people. She thanked Celestia that the Magi of the Fourth Circle that had come to ‘escort’ the Changelings would likely have listening- and recording-spells running through-out the carriage as part of their basic security measures, given the way that previous interactions between Ponies and Changelings had gone, but still the Border Guard resolved to memorize as much of the conversation as she could in-case of a mishap.

At least the Queen is giving us information freely, even if she is a raging bitch. Glimmer sighed mentally, tuning back into the conversation and noting that Dappled was looking flustered, and Queen Chrysalis had an extremely predatory smirk on her face. I appear to have missed something vital here … “Guard Dappled, anything you’d like to tell me?”

“I … uhm well, that is to say, it’s something I’d rather not share.”

“Oh, are you saying that my little Scout is the only one you wish to ‘share’ with?”

“I SAID NOTHING OF … nothing of the sort!” Dappled’s voice dropped from hysterical to nearly a whisper as one of the foals under Chrysalis’s blankets squirmed and gave a small cry. “It was an accident, a accident, I wouldn’t … I didn’t mean to, that is to say I’m not adverse to such things but it was an accident and I’m sorry aaaaand you’re going to milk this for all it’s worth, aren’t you, your majesty?”

“I could get Scout to milk it for you?” Chrysalis said, chortling like a mad ferret as Guard Dappled groaned and placed his hooves over his face, blushing brilliant crimson.

“Riiiiiiight. Well, whatever, somepony will pry it out of you during debriefing, Dappled, but for now I recommend we make ourselves comfortable as we can. It’s going to be a long night and I don’t think any of us are going to be allowed to sleep until Captain Rosebush is satisfied.” The pink Unicorn muttered darkly, giving the sheepish-looking empath at her side a withering look. “Speaking of which, Queen Chrysalis, if you would kindly take my advice and not get on the Captain’s bad side, she is … was … a big fan of Captain Shining Armor and was understandably miffed when …”

“When Princess Cadence snatched him up for boring sex?” Chrysalis interjected, chuckling as Twilight Glimmer choked and spluttered and Dappled’s eyes almost popped out of his skull. “What, I’m being serious here, when I first assumed her form we had only had the Princess of the Endless Buffet in a cocoon for a few hours, only long enough to pry open a few surface memories. I had assumed the supposed physical incarnation of love would have been an absolute freak between the sheets. Imagine my surprise when I proceeded to screw Shining’s brains out and learned that the kinkiest thing Cadence ever did for Shining outside of the missionary position was a wingjob, and a sad, pitiful attempt at that judging from his reaction when I gave him a Las Pegasus ‘Pole-Rider’.”

“Oh, oh sweet Faust I need to leave the room …” Dappled muttered, starting to sweat heavily as he tried to get up, only for a bump in the rails to flop the comatose Scout away from her drooling perch at the window and face-first into his lap.

“Y-you … what, no, I didn’t mean that at all, listen you …” The pink Unicorn stammered, pointing a hoof at the Changeling Queen and doing her best to ignore Dappled’s strained whispers of ‘This cannot be happening!’ from next to her. “I mean, Rosebush came up through the ranks thanks to Shining Armor’s training and influence, she looks up to him and respects him greatly, and she might hold a personal grudge for what you and your Changelings did at his wedding …”

“Considering how much stamina that Stallon can boast, I’m not surprised his little pocket-private was miffed he was getting a ball and chain. Believe me, I definitely amended a few points of our plan after I realized just what kind of armaments the Royal Captain was equiped with.”

“…WHAT? No, no, I mean she greatly respects and admires her former Captain, she wasn’t his lover!”

“Oh, so she’s a Filly Fooler, that’s fine …”

“NO! I mean she respected Shining Armor, as one soldier to another, and you kidnapped his fiancée, placed him under mind-control and invaded the city he was sworn to protect!” Almost glowing pink from frustration and embarrassment, slapping a hoof down onto the seat next to her for emphasis and scowling as the Changeling Queen stuck a hoof to her mouth to muffle her chortling. “You knew damn well what I meant, didn’t you?”

“Naturally.” The Queen smirked, and Glimmer opened her mouth to fire off a retort when Dappled yelped, shooting out of his seat and pushing Scout away in the same motion, before scooting for the doorway on three legs, the fourth held to his crotch. “Oh dear …”

“My Queen?” Scout mumbled from an awkward position on the floor, her tail and hind-legs jutting up into the air. “Why am I upside down?”

“Oh, you fell into Dappled’s lap and were nuzzling his sheath.” The Queen replied bluntly, to which Scout simply replied with a soft ‘Oh.’, and Glimmer put both hooves to her face, confident that her blush would have been a beacon visible from nearing Canterlot. “Why don’t you go see if he’s okay, my child? I think you may have nipped him in your … oh, so you were dreaming about …”

“Yes.” Scout replied in monotone, turning her head to look at Glimmer, as did Chrysalis, although the Changeling Queen’s muzzle had returned to the triumphant smirk she had worn shortly before.

“Well, go then, Scout. I’m sure our dear Captain Glimmer will be more than happy to keep me company. Perhaps she’d even like to hold one of my offspring?” Chrysalis offered, shifting a hoof under her blanket and removing one of the black female twins, who gave a sleepy yawn and hugged the limb.

Mind befuddled by the new information, as well as the image of Scout nipping Dappled on the sheath, Glimmer mechanically accepted the small black Changeling and thus was unable to protest as Scout left, the frazzled Guard having to deal with a sleepy foal that fussed and whined softly at leaving her mother but soon latched onto Glimmer’s limb, snuggling into the Unicorn’s fur and drifting off into sleep, one hind-leg twitching as the day-glow pink Unicorn levitated a blanket out from under her seat and wrapped herself and the slumbering Changeling … foal in the thick woollen blanket.

It’s so soft. Glimmer thought in wonder, trailing a hoof over the small Changeling’s belly, which made the tiny filly whicker softly in her sleep. So like a normal foal, but the Changelings have carpaces. Is that something they develop as they grow older? But I distinctly remember Peach Seed reporting that Queen Chrysalis claimed she only laid eggs, and they hatched into miniature Changelings … yet these are Foals. If not for their horn and manes, I’d swear they were normal Ponies.

Glimmer shot a sneaky look towards the Changeling Queen, who had turned her head to look out the window towards the gleaming capital of Equestria, that same wistful smile that éseemed so out-of-place on the face of one of the Ponies worst enemies.

So if they’re not normal Changelings, and they are Chrysalis’s offspring … then what are they?

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“You two ‘bout done over there?” Applebloom sighed, blushing heavily as the delighted squeaks and squelching noises from the other side of the club-house began to reach a level of volume that the young Farm-pony was sure could be heard from Ponyville. “Sweetie Belle’s the only one that can cast spells, an’ this here scroll could have our Cutie Ma-”

“Cummin’! I’m cummin’!”

“Sweetie! Oh Faust, Sweetie, don’t stop!”

“Ah guess not …” The young Farm-pony groaned, forcing herself to pull a hoof away from between her hind legs as Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo ground against each other eagerly, clinging to one another as they rode out their pleasure to the last drop.

Speakin’ of drops, gonna be heck on Equuis to get the stains outta these floor-boards. Applebloom thought glumly as she took a look at the puddle the two Ponies had left on the floor, and the dark stains her own making had left beneath her as the young Farm-pony tried to keep herself ‘occupied’ as Sweetie and Scoots had enthusiastically entertained each other.

First it had been her and Scootaloo, then Sweetie and Scootaloo, then herself and Sweetie, and now Scootaloo and Sweetie were at it again. It wasn’t like Applebloom didn’t like her friends, but she wasn’t sure if she liked-liked them, or if it was just the itchy, craving feeling that was plaguing them all that was making them les-brians or whatever fancy-schmancy word the grown-ups used to talk about Mares who diddled other Mares.

Wait, is Applejack gonna be ma … nah, Ah caught her with Rainbow Dash in the barn that one time. But will Rarity be okay with this? An’ Scoot’s parents? Uhm … buck. The young farm-pony sighed and turned back to the unrolled scroll on the wooden table in-front of her, eyes narrowing as she tried to make sense of it.

It wasn’t as if she couldn’t read the words, or understand their meanings, but some of the spells described in the scroll seemed plain weird or just stupid. Why would anypony want their hair to form spikes? Who could have possibly thought that waving a magical wand around could make a pony into a ‘magical moon filly’? And was this ‘Spear Maiden’ spell that Twilight’s translation kept on going off on tangents about ‘urges’ a combat spell or not

“I don’t think I can walk … Scoots, drag me over to the scroll, please?”

“I wanna call you a lightweight, but yeah, ow, more than a bit sore myself.”

Rolling her eyes at the antics of her friends, Applebloom tottered over to help the white Unicorn up, blushing heavily as she separated the two panting young Mares with a loud squelch and helped Scootaloo drag the apparently-boneless Unicorn over to the scroll in question.

“Ah’ve been lookin’ over this thing, an’ most of the spells don’t seem that useful, but this one …” Applebloom began, tapping a hoof on the segment, possibly the longest one on the scroll, that held the details of the ‘Spear Maiden’ spell. “This one might be the one we need.”

“What do we need spears for? We tried to join the Royal Guard, and Twilight says we’re on their ‘watch list’ now …”

“Wait, so they’re counting down the days till we’re legally old enough to join?” Scootaloo asked, eyes lighting up.

“Ah think Sweetie Belle means the other kind o’ watch list, Scoots.” Applebloom tried to bring her friend down to earth, metaphorically speaking, before turning back to the doubting Unicorn. “An’ nah, Ah think this spell will help us be warriors. Sure is complicated, an’ let’s be honest here girls, we get into a lotta scrapes. Might be nice to have some magical fightin’ hoo-hah to fall back on next time we get jumped by a Cragodile or Cockatrice in the Everfree Forest.”

“I don’t know...” Sweetie Belle muttered, eying the spell with narrowed eyes. “Some of these formulas seem a little odd to me. I think this one would make us grow something? It seems to be some sort of transformation spell, but this is way above anything I’ve ever seen, or what Twilight has taught me.”

“Even your sis?” Scootaloo asked nervously, small wings fluttering as the orange Pegasus apparently found it difficult to meet the eyes of her fellow Crusaders.

“Rarity developed the gem-detection spell, but that has more to do with her Cutie Mark than any real skill with magic. It’s part of the reason why Twilight is tutoring us all, or was before she became a Princess. Twilight’s the only real magic expert in town, and Cherilee is an Earth Pony, so she doesn’t know really anything about Unicorn magic …” The small white Unicorn muttered, shooting Applebloom an apologetic look.

“Ain’t no problem, Sweetie. Cherilee’s a good teacher an’ a great mare, but some things only one o’ your own Tribe can teach, ah guess.”

Applebloom found herself dealing with Scootaloo as Sweetie Belle tried to make sense of the spell-scroll, the farm-pony trying to keep the pegasus’s hooves to herself as Scootaloo apparently suffered another bout of itchy-craving sensations and tried to drag both of her friends away from the scroll for more ‘fun’.

“Can’t yah hold it in for like, five minutes?” Applebloom snorted as she struggled with the smaller Pegasus, enjoying the feel of Scoot’s body pressing against her as much as the wrestling itself. Something within her really liked being on-top, something to do with the itchy-craving feeling.

“Nooooooooo.” The orange Pegasus whined, wiggling on her belly underneath Applebloom, her small, stunted wings flapping madly and slapping against the farm-pony’s barrel. “I need something in my cooter, ‘Bloom! Rubbin’ and lickin’ only does so much! I’m itching like mad!”

“Well the only thing that’d fit in you would be Sweetie’s horn, and she’s busy right now!” Applebloom snorted, looking around the room for something suitable and shuddering as she came up with precious few options. Apart from the hand-broom and a table-leg that had gotten snapped off a few weeks ago and never thrown out, there really wasn’t much else the Crusaders could use …

“And my horn is not a dildo, thank you!” The Unicorn sniffed in an insulted fashion at the very thought of it. “Besides, I think I can cast this spell. I will need utter silence … that means you stay quiet, Scootaloo! Silence, and the Spell-Scroll, and I need us all to hold still.”

“You sure?” Scootaloo asked at the same time as Applebloom said “Tha’s amazin’, Sweetie!”

“Well, yes, it’s going to be difficult, but the spell is supposed to be mostly self-sustaining once I get it started. I just need to draw out enough magic to power the first part of the spell, make sure I follow the instructions and we should all become spear-maidens.” The unicorn explained, squiting at the scroll, and then her friends. “But you’ll both need to remain still for about … two minutes, maybe three tops. This spell is really, really complex, I can’t afford to mess it up!”

Applebloom craned her neck and head to glare down at Scootaloo, whose wings buzzed nervously and gave an apologetic grin to the other two.

“It was just the one time!” She protested as her two friends looked at each other knowingly, then gave her another dirty look. “Let it go already, it was weeks ago!”

“You tackled Steven when we were trying to be Cutiemark Crusader Dragon Researchers, and startled him so badly his tail flattened our tent and all our supplies! We’re just lucky he’s friendly and was happy to help us get back to town! You need to learn to sit still without having Applebloom or I to sit on you!” Sweetie Belle muttered, her horn glowing softly as the young Unicorn began pulling mana out of the air and the ground to augment her own reserves, face screwed up into a mask of concentration. “So practice while I try to gather enough magic to cast the spell!”

“And how long will that take?” The orange Pegasus asked, earning a positively filthy look from the Unicorn.

“Ten minutes or so …”

“Great! Hey, Applebloom! Let me turn over, I’ve got a good idea what we can get done in ten minutes!”

“You’re damn incorrigible.” The farm-pony muttered, but complied, the eager Pegasus under her providing a welcome balm to the itchy, craving sensations and a momentary distraction to Applebloom’s concerns for tomorrow morning…

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“Well, that was an entirely inappropriate use of a speaker system.” Twilight muttered darkly as she and Luna shared some hot chocolate in the kitchen, the thunderous chorus of snoring from the upper levels of the library a welcome reprieve to what they had seen in the astral realm, and the dreams of Ponyville’s inhabitants.

The deranged, sexually deviated, flat-out weird inhabitants. Twilight found herself wondering if it would be inappropriate to move back to Canterlot for a few months to try and wait out whatever surge of strangeness was gripping her adoptive home.

Walking out of the bedroom to find Trixie had ‘sprouted’ in the slumbering hooves of the Royal Guards who had ‘glomped’ her and was frotting away with one of the sleeping Stallions would be an image that would take weeks of therapy to erase from her mind, of that Twilight was certain.

“That pony really does love her, eh, wubs I believe they are called?” Chortling, Luna levitated a pair of marshmallows into her hot drink and nudged Twilight with a wing. “Believe me, Twilight, what you have seen tonight was nothing compared to some of what I have witnessed when returning to my duties after a thousand years on the moon. My first dream-walking after my purification, with my sister by my side to make sure I would not be possessed by a Nightmare again, we drifted into the dream of a certain Royal Guard Captain …”

“Oh dear sweet Faust no …”

“Don’t be a party-pooper! Shining Armor looked absolutely adorable in that wedding dress!” The blue alicorn chortled, a far-away look in her eyes. “I admit to being very intimidated by your brother when we first met after I had been purified, but seeing him being carried through a hideously pink doorway into an equally frilly room by an incredibly burly Princess Cadence helped ease my fears about him.”

Twilight’s response was a loud groan, before face-planting onto the kitchen table and mumbling under her breath.

“Incidentally, that was also the first time I had ever heard about another Princess apart from my sister. I was shocked, of course, and asked Celestia where such a burly Mare had come from and how she had proven worthy to become an Ascendant, and it took my sister almost a minute to stop laughing at the scene before us to explain to me that Cadence was not a clydesdale or draft-horse as the dream-scape before us had suggested.” Completely ignoring her lover’s protestations, Luna grinned cheekily at her lover as she continued her story. “When several weeks had passed and both Celestia and I had finally managed to convince poor Shining Armor that I really wasn’t going to plunge the world into eternal night again, or eat his girlfriend whole, I was introduced to Cadence at last … and it only took hoof-cuffing Shining Armor to the flag-pole in the middle of the castle’s parade-grounds with a set of adamantite cuffs and a magic-negating shackle on his horn to separate him from her side.”

“My ‘niece’ was extraordinarily shy around me for a few minutes until Celestia was able to explain to her the … cultural differences I was suffering from, at which point I rapidly ended up the one who was left on the back-hoof as Cadence and Celestia tag-teamed me and then dragged me down to Canterlot for a shopping spree that lasted two whole days.” The Lunar Princess finished, wickering softly at the memory. The manic glee in Celestia’s eyes as she dragged Luna around the town, the exuberance in Cadence’s words as the shy Thestral was dragged from shop to shop, the hideous expenditure of bits …

“Moving on from disturbing revelations about my brother’s subconscious sexuality and Cadence’s love of … shopping.” The purple alicorn said, and both Princesses shuddered at the dreaded word. “The Royal Guards are supposed to be waking up sometime soon, we’ve got enough butternut pumpkin soup, bread and fruit-juice to hopefully feed them … and then what? We wait for the Royal Agents to just show up? I don’t suppose Princess Celestia told you who they were?”

“No, I assumed you knew who they were!” Luna queried, shooting Twilight a worried look. “They have never identified themselves to you? Not once?”

“No. I’ve lived in Ponyville for three years, Luna. Three. Years. I’m more than a little concerned about it now that I have hard evidence that there are Royal Agents officially stationed here.” Wings rustling with irritation, Twilight levitated her cup of hot chocolate to her lips and took a long drink, hoping the warm drink would soothe her already frazzled nerves. “So either we’ve got the worst slackers in the history of Equestria on our hooves, or even worse, it raises the possibility Princess Celestia ordered them to stay out of situations that could have easily resulted in my friends being injured or worse, simply to see if I could ‘ascend’.”

“Twilight, I find it very, very difficult to imagine Celestia would allow you to come to any real harm. Test you to your limits, yes, but my sister would sooner cut off her own wings than allow you to come to lasting harm, physically or emotionally.” The Lunar Princess protested, a look of confused alarm on her face. “Surely, this must be a mistake, or an error in communication with the Royal Agents. When they arrive, we’ll make sure to get to the bottom of this, both of us.”

“I just don’t know anymore. Luna, after everything that’s happened, learning that Earth Ponies and Pegasi have something called ‘innate magic’ that Princess Celestia has allowed to disappear from public knowledge, that there are Royal Agents in this town and they have never once come to my aid, or that of my friends, and then I learn that my mentor, the Pony who drilled into me relentlessly that truth and integrity are the greatest strengths a Pony can possess has been personally obscuring momentous events in history has shaken me more than I thought possible.”

“I want to trust Princess Celestia, because I know she’s a good pony, she’s shown it, proven it, so many, many times now. For Faust’s sake, she’s like a second mother to me! She taught me everything I know, she’s helped me become everything I am!” Twilight explained, feeling the hot, shameful sting of tears in her eyes as the words came tumbling out, unstoppable and unending. “I want to believe there’s a point to everything, that it all means something and that she wasn’t really throwing my friends and I to the wolves, but after everything I’ve learned today I just can’t do it, not right now. Even if it all has been for a worthy cause, I just can’t understand why all of this has been necessary. Surely there had to be some other way, some method that didn’t involve such underhooved tactics and outright lying to an entire nation.”

“You feel betrayed that your shining idol is not some pristine, perfect mare like you always thought, and that you might be a pawn, rather than a friend?” Luna’s words cut deeper than Twilight thought they would, but still the purple mare nodded, not trusting her voice not to crack with fear and despair.

There was an awkward moment of silence before Luna got to her hooves and walked away, leaving Twilight feeling small and fragile in the chill night that even the living wooden walls of the library couldn’t quite keep away.

Oh well done, Twilight, you complete fool! Whine to Luna that you’re scared that her sister isn’t bloody perfect, after everything that has happened between them! Luna’s infection by the Nightmare Spirit, being banished, coming back to Equis and getting slandered day-in and day-out by almost everypony in Equestria! Twilight whimpered and put her muzzle back down on the table, putting her hooves over her muzzle and wrapping her wings around her head and shoulders as her tears cut hot trails down the fur on her cheeks. You’ve always trusted Princess Celestia, she’s always worked for the greater good, the Princess has never ever ever tried to put herself first!

Yet the sting of her mentor’s dismissal of her concerns at Cadence’s wedding when Twilight alone had noticed that ‘Princess of Love’ was acting extremely out of character remained firmly etched in Twilight’s mind, a fatal crack in the youngest Alicorn’s image of her perfect princess that expanded as her mind refused to listen to her heart and explored that crack further, expanding it with all the mistakes and strange ‘coincidences’ that Twilight had noticed over the past few years till Celestia’s image was made up more of cracks than perfection.

Allowing Discord’s statue to just stand there in the Canterlot Gardens where anypony could just wander past and accidentally release him. Her censoring of our history left us all entirely unprepared for Sombra’s return and in turn left the defence of an entire nation of Ponies who could barely remember their own names, let alone how to properly function as a society, in the hooves of my brother and sister-in-law, who were completely isolated from Equestria. And that is just the tip of the iceberg …

Twilight’s distressing train of thought was broken when the loud ‘thump’ of her tea-kettle on the kitchen table made her flinch and peer out of her cocoon of wings and limbs to see a bemused-looking Luna levitating the jar of drinking chocolate and a bulk-packet of marshmallows down next to it.

“If it is any consolation, dear Twilight, I share your concerns. It can be hard to accept that Celestia can love a Pony as deeply as she does and yet still involve them in her plans in such fashion, yet perhaps you need to take a step back and consider this;” The Lunar Princess gave Twilight a small smile and used her own wing to slowly pry open Twilight’s ‘cocoon’ as she made them both more hot chocolate. “You were placed into danger to force your Ascension, yet that would mean that Celestia’s eyes were upon you always. Always. And I seem to recall my sister talking my ear off during my convalescence in Canterlot with how the Parliament of Nobles would be incensed with her when a certain little purple filly would get a scrape or a ‘boo-boo’, and Celestia would fly out of the hall so fast she’s knock Ponies over to be by her side.”

Twilight ducked her head and chuckled, sniffling as she remembered several incidents during her childhood. “I remember one time I was trying to practice Clover the Clever’s tripartate algorhytm and the marbles I was using as placeholders for the magical foci shot off everywhere. I smashed three vases to pieces, punched a hole in the door and whacked myself upside the head, so I was bleeding everywhere when Princess Celestia found me half-conscious and being fussed over by the maids.”

“Ah yes, the “Oh Dear Faust she’s killed herself! Again!” incident.” Luna gave a soft, throaty laugh, adopting an overly horrified expression and a poor impression of Celestia’s voice. “My sister complained you were more worried about getting blood all over her wings when she was carrying you to the Royal Physician than the fact you had nearly cracked you little skull with a solid-agate marble! Or the time she was telling me about how you’d just perfected your teleportation spell and were so eager to tell your parents you teleported away without letting Celestia know where you were going, and ended up stuck on the roof for five hours because your parents were hosting a party and their house was packed with guests…”

“And I’d set the spell to ensure I would have at least three foot of clearance to avoid any accidents, so it ended up putting me in the closest area where that restriction applied, which meant on the damn roof, and I had to cling to the chimney for dear life until one of the Royal Guards, a Pegasi, came to the house to ask my parents if they knew where I was and found me covered in soot and bawling my eyes out.”

“Apparently his report ended with “Can I adopt her?”, to which Celestia told me she had informed him to get in line.” Luna finished, gently prising the last of Twilight’s limbs off her tear-lined face and sat herself down at Twilight’s side, wrapping a wing around her lover and holding her tighly as Twilight laughed weakly at the memories.

“I’m being an ass, aren’t I?” Twilight whispered after several moments of silence, staring into her cup of fresh hot chocolate as if it contained the secrets of the universe.

“Yes, but not necessarily an unjustified one, Twilight. It is natural to feel alarmed when one begins to grasp the scope of Celestia’s manipulations, but please do not make my mistake.” The Lunar Princess whispered into Twilight’s ear, twining a leg around one of Twilight’s own forelimbs as the two Alicorns leaned into each other. “Don’t sit back and blindly rely upon your memories for comfort out of fear of hurting someone close to you while your doubts and fears eat away at you. Talk to Celestia, and don’t be afraid to force a confrontation if you must. She may try to save the world from behind the scenes, but my sister is still a pony, Twilight, and she would be horrified to hear you are losing faith in her, because I know she has enormous faith in you, not your potential, or your mind or your magic, but you, Twilight Sparkle, her beloved student and friend.”

Sighing softly, Twilight nuzzled in under Luna’s head, savouring the unexpected comfort of being held, rather than the one doing the holding, and forced herself through the breathing exercises to calm herself down before speaking.

“Well… it might be cheesy, and she might be busy, but I think this qualifies for a ‘Friendship Report’.” Twilight muttered, and poked Luna in the ribs when the dark-blue Alicorn burst into giggles. “We’ll have to write it here, as Spike is likely to set me on fire if I wake him up at this time of night for anything less than a disaster needing the Elements of Harmony to fix.”

Whatever Luna was about to say next was lost in a loud yawn that came down the stairs, followed by another, and another again.

The Royal Guards were beginning to wake up at last.

Chapter 43

CHAPTER 43

It was likely taking all of Captain Rosebush’s self-control to not swear out loud as she watched the train start to pull into one of the more distant wings of Canterlot Central Station, as her Royal Guards had to struggle to keep a growing knot of Ponies out of the way, Ponies who had no business being up at three in the morning and carrying cameras and press-badges.

“Princess Celestia, with your permission, once the Changelings are securely contained in their new quarters, I am going to start hunting down whoever let slip about this … debacle, and have them barred for life from Canterlot.” The Pegasus muttered darkly, glaring at the knot of reporters with enough intensity Princess Celestia was surprised nopony was spontaneously combusting on the spot.

“Permission granted, Captain, you have my full blessings. This is a horrendous breach of security, and if I find any of the Royal Guard were directly involved, they can consider their position terminated and full charges laid against them the instant you find enough evidence to prove their guilt.” The Solar Princess murmured, only thousands of years of experience keeping her face and body-posture the perfect expression of serene calm, despite the whirling maelstrom of emotion inside of her.

If the media, scandal-hungry as ever, didn’t devour her in a few hours as she tried to explain what had really happened in Ponyville. If Rosebush’s ponies could provide enough proof to finally pin that vile old bastard, Bluebone, to the wall and maybe topple his hateful little pro-unicorn group in the process. If the Changelings really were being honest in their desire to surrender and seek peace.

If Luna and Twilight really needed the entire contents of that box …

That is the very last thing you need to be thinking about right now, Celestia. The Solar Monarch chided herself mentally, eyes boring holes into the train’s carriages, seeking some sign of treachery, either from within or without. Even your best Magi couldn’t tell you if the Queen of the Changelings was telepathic, only that she had empathic powers on par with Cadence’s own. Faust only knows what damage she could do if she plucks the information about how vulnerable Twilight and Luna are right now from your head …

Oh Faust. What if she really can read my mind, and knows that Discord and I are ‘entangled’? What if she can, and she gets that information, and then attempts to use it as leverage against me? Captain Rosebush and Commander Nightshade have assured me that we can hold the Changelings in the Red Rooms in the northern wing of the castle, that the Night Guard has sealed up the secret doors and booby-trapped the passages between that wing and the rest of the castle, and Bleak Mountain himself is doing the enchanting on the Castle Guards’ helmets to help ward their minds against any telepathic attacks.

It was a testimony to the dedication and hard-work of her little Ponies that the work was being done so quickly, and with no complaint, but still the Solar Monarch fretted that she once again had too many irons in the fire with the situation before her, but no single distraction before her could safely be put aside to focus on the others.

This would be far easier if Luna was not bound to Twilight right now because of their Sympathy! If either, or better yet, both of them were by my side, I would have two very intelligent, very powerful Alicorns to advise and help me! Celestia grumbled as the the train came to a close, and a pair of Unicorns in the muted tan-and-gold uniforms of the Border Guard, a mare with a shockingly vibrant pink with an ethereal mane of neon-bright indigo, and a dull brown stallion with a wheat-golden mane and tail, came out of the nearest carriage.

As Celestia raised an eyebrow at the unlikely pair and Rosebush muttered obscenities under her breath about Border Guards and a lack of protocol, the mare trotted over to the Solar Monarch and the Captain of the Royal Guard, while the stallion sighed heavily and limped over to the press-ponies, his horn flickering with barely-visible ripples of magic.

Either he is a student of the Empty Horn style, or there’s something strange going on with that one. Celestia thought to herself as the pink mare approached and gave a crisp salute that seemed very much at odds with the huge eyes she was staring at her Princess with. “Ma-Ma’am, your Highness, Captain Twilight Glimmer of Garrison 42, reporting.”

“Where are the Magi, captain? Why are they not reporting to her majesty, and why is a Border Guard so far from her post?” Rosebush snapped, glaring down at the other mare, wings rustling with her anger.

“Apologies Ma’am, but we weren’t able to send a message-spell, something about a shortage of Dragon’s Fire? But the Magi thought of an idea about how to handle Ponies who might stumble onto the scene, and Private Dappled Light is enacting the plan right about … now.” Cringing slightly, the pink Unicorn turned her head and winced as there was a sudden burst of noise from the knot of reporters on the other side of the wall of Royal Guards.

Celestia looked on with amazement as the press-ponies started arguing about who had called them out here on such a ‘worthless’ scoop, there was nothing going on, they were tired, cold, so on and so forth while her own Royal Guards shook themselves and looked around in irritation and confusion, with the strange Border Guard standing just behind the more ornately-dressed Royal Guards with a tired, resigned look on his face.

“Captain, did that Unicorn just use empathic magic?” Rosebush’s voice came out in a strangled whisper as the Pegasi stared at the rapidly-retreated plots of the press-ponies. “Colourless, nearly invisible empathic magic at that?”

“Yes, Ma’am. It appears that Private Dappled Light’s unique talent is to make a set area around himself appear unappealing and unimportant for a short while, including himself. It probably explains why such a rare and powerful talent ended up being wasted on a border with the Badlands.”

It took a considerable amount of effort on Celestia’s part to not show any signs of the distress she was feeling at the news that an empath of such power had just been floating around the border, unregistered but somehow still a member of her beloved Royal Guard!

Ponies with empathic or telepathic abilities were rare, and naturally occurring gifts were rarer still, and were supposed to be detected as early as possible so Celesita or Bleak Mountain could find them and teach them how to use their abilities with restraint and respect for the lives around them. History was rife with Ponies bearing such gifts causing events so traumatic they echoed through history, either accidentally or with grim purpose. Rarely had a natural-born empath not been tempted to tread darker paths, especially since such gifts often made the empath in question seem strange, and thus isolated and mistrusted by those around them.

Celestia was well aware of what happened when an outcast gained overwhelming power over her tormentors, and she had sworn an oath millennia ago to always seek to help those with such gifts learn to use them responsibly and with mercy in their hearts.

Faust only knew how many ‘accidental’ romances Cadence had caused before Celestia had managed to help the young filly learn how to ‘turn off’ her powers, and it had taken almost two years to do so, with the first year mostly hopelessly explaining to the stubborn young Pegicorn that just because Ponies could fall in love didn’t mean they should fall in love, especially with just a random bystander, which was distressingly difficult given the rebellious stage that Celestia had found her young ‘niece’, and Cadence's hideously lop-sided view on romance, fuelled as much by hormones and cheesy romance novels so popular with young girls as Cadence’s own twisted family life.

The fact that at least a dozen failed marriages were the result of her meddling had been the final straw of Cadence’s stubborn refusal to learn to control her powers and not just let them activate wildly. Rebellious teenage urges and mis-interpreting her subconscious urges as the ‘will’ of Love itself, to cause ponies to fall in love at the drop of a hat, coupled with the budding impulses of her Ascended Dominion pushing her to ‘act’ to spread Love everywhere she went had almost turned Cadence into a threat on-par with Nightmare Moon. When the bit had dropped, so to speak, it had taken almost an entire third year in therapy for Cadence to come to grips with what she had done, what she had almost become, and in a bitter twist of irony, it was only after she had accepted these flaws and sworn to never abuse her ability that the Powers had seen fit to reach down and cause her to Ascend from Pegicorn to Alicorn.

Faust only knew if Pinkie Pie was an empath or it was just whatever strange gift allowed her to tap into the powers of Chaos to teleport at will, her bizarre knack of predicting the future and her unique ability access pocket-dimensions also allowed her to spread laughter and joy in her wake, regardless of the intentions of those around her. Princess Celestia had read both the Royal Agents’ reports and Twilight’s own studies and still couldn’t get a firm grasp on just what the bubbly, bouncy Earth Pony was.

And now fate had delivered a fully grown adult Pony into her hooves, one that should have been detected years ago by highly-paid, supposedly well-trained and outrageously legally-protected Royal Agents whose jobs were to find the unusual and the dangerous and bring them to her attention immediately. To have an Empath pop up right then and there, in the middle of when everything was going to tartarus in a handbasket, and one that had been a part of her Royal Guard and no-doubt vetted and checked a dozen times over by countless officials and bureaucrats before being assigned his post was almost enough to make the Solar Princess want to go on a rampage through the Castle until she found those responsible and brought them to task!

If she didn’t know better, Celestia would swear the Powers were actively working against her, or at least seeing just how far she could be pushed before losing her temper in public. It wouldn’t be the first time they had tweaked her nose and reminded her of humility, or left her with dire reminders that Immortal though she was, a God was not her station nor destiny, but she was certain that the Powers wouldn’t play that sort of game in a situation as dire as the one before her. They valued saving lives, after all, and wars were notorious for doing the exact opposite.

And yet, you’ve seen first-hoof that they are perfectly willing to allow an entire world to go to war and turn a blind eye while the dominant species wipe each other out to allow newer, better creations to flourish. A cold part of Celestia’s mind pointed out, making the Solar Monarch shiver, a movement that had nothing to do with the crisp pre-dawn air. The mammoths, the thunder-lizards, the land where Tirek and Scorpan came from …

Enough! Celestia quietened the rebellious part of her mind with a sharp whip-crack of a command and turned her full focus to the young Empath himself, who had apparently limped over while Celestia was lost in thought and was currently saluting just as crisply as the Border Captain … but also looked like he was either going to faint or pee himself just by being in her presence.

“Private Dappled, I presume.” Celestia murmured softly, trying hard to not laugh as the poor Stallion saluted again and this time succeeded in banging himself straight on the muzzle in the process. “At ease, both of you. I assume that the Changeling Queen is subdued? The last thing Canterlot needs is a running battle through the streets.”

“At the risk of sounding … sympathetic to the ‘enemy’, your majesty, I think a kitten-fart could push her into the pits of tartarus right now.” Captain Glimmer said after a short, shared look with Private Dappled. “The Changelings’ Queen looks like somebody dropped a house on her, and she’s with three foals. The few of her Changelings that are still alive are half-starved themselves and are desperately protective of their Queen.”

“It was a castle.” The Solar Monarch corrected, smiling down at the two Border Guards.

“Beg pardon, your majesty?” Dappled squeaked, eyes going wide. “Did you just say …”

“A castle. Princess Twilight Sparkle dropped a castle on-top of Queen Chrysalis after recovering three fillies that the Changelings had kidnapped from Ponyville in an attempt to lure Princess Twilight out so they could capture her.”

“Wow. Well, that explains why Sparky got the wings then.” Glimmer muttered softly, closing her eyes and sighing, while Dappled litereally trembled in-place.

“Ahem, yes well, the Changelings?” Princess Celestia urged when it became apparent the two Border Guards were becoming somewhat overwhelmed by the news, and the throbbing vein in Rosebush’s temple appeared to be reaching the point it would literally burst. “Exactly how did the Magi suggest we transport them to the Castle without causing a disaster?”

“Uhmm, about that, your Majesty, Ma’am, the Magi came up with a … a odd method. And you’re going to need to have somepony see to refurbishing the carriages after we’re done.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia found herself trying to not keep sighing at the state of things as the ‘refugees’ stumbled their way up to Canterlot Castle, clustered protectively around the cloth-covered wagon carrying their ‘wounded kin’, the gaggle of ragged-looking earth-ponies and pegasi, all wearing red ‘scarves’ that had once served as the blinds on the carriages’ windows, surrounded in-turn by Royal Guards and Magi, with the empath, Dappled, sitting in the passenger-seat of the wagon, horn flickering with barely-visible magic as he created a bubble of ‘disinterest’ around the whole procession.

Should anypony or anything be able to pierce Dappled Light’s spell-barrier, the cover story of Celestia personally taking an interest in a family of wanderers who might have clues about how Sunset Shimmer had managed to return to Equuis, and then run afoul of a Chimera on their way to warn Canterlot of the danger, and thus needing to take them into protective custody and away from potential threats, like the media, would hopefully cover up why Princess Celestia herself was marching alongside the ‘refugees’.

The only reason she did not feel absolute terror at allowing Changelings to roam her city with such an easily-discarded disguise as a scarf and so few Guards to ‘escort’ them was because when the Changelings had seen her, the ‘Hive’ had all but prostrated themselves and begged her to spare their Queen, who in turn had shakily emerged from the train carriage, looking more like a pony put together out of shattered black porcelain rather than a true threat to Ponykind at large, and in turn knelt and sworn a blood-oath that she and her Hive would do no harm unless harm was done to them, drawing the blood from a leg with her own fangs to seal the oath and using her own magic to do so, the exertion of which almost killed her and earned both Princess Celestia and the ailing Changeling Queen a dire look from the burly middle-aged nurse that was looking after the three Changeling foals.

The Solar Monarch could feel the power of the oath even now, even as her skin crawled at the use of blood magic. Yet the oath was obviously functional, binding the Changeling Queen and her surviving kin from doing any harm …

Unfortuantely, it also bound Celestia and those who followed her in turn. A clever little trap by the Changeling Queen, but then capital punishment had never been a goal of Princess Celestia, even if certain individuals richly deserved it. Still, the blood-oath served its goal and would allow Celestia and her Ponies to safey contain the Changelings and keep them from doing harm of any kind.

The same could not, however, be said for the Kattians. The strange, small, fluffy cat-like creatures refused to leave the carriages, mewling unhappily and swiping half-heartedly at the Guards, Magi and Changelings who tried to coax them out. Captain Rosebush was decidedly unhappy about being left with a handful of Guards and Magi on ‘cat-sitting duty’, but Celestia was unwilling to leave a sentient, if mute, species alone in a strange and alien city without protectors or escorts.

The march to Canterlot Castle felt like it lasted an eternity, though it was only an hour or so. The dimly-seen shapes of the Night Guard, including Major Nightshade, acting-commander of the Night Guard, whose hideously-obvious neon-yellow mane was both a source of comfort and irritation to the Solar Monarch: Whatever personal failings, the Thestral might possess, her courage and combat skills were amongst the best all the branches of the Royal Guard could boast and would thus be invaluable if the Changelings truly planned mischief, or worse still, the Shadow Council made another move against her, but the infamous Thestral’s all-consuming need to show-off was flying straight in the need for stealth on this mission.

Faust as my witness, if I make it through the next week without suffering a coronary, another assassination attempt or an scatter-brained attempt at a political coup d'état, I’m going to seriously consider taking Discord up on his offer and scarper off to a tropical beach somewhere for a month or two and do nothing but raise and lower the sun and just be me for a while!

It was … distressing to say the least, seeing how easily Dappled Light’s innate gift allowed them to slip un-noticed into the Castle proper. Veteran guards with many commendations and years of decorated service yawned and looked the other way as the Changeling Queen was clumsily extracted from her cart and carried into the Castle. Loyal and dedicated maids, butlers and the variety of other roles that kept the Castle running like clockwork became distracted or walked away from their tasks when the group passed too close.

Thankfully, getting the Changelings into the North Wing proved simple enough, although Dappled looked utterly exhausted when he finally canceled his spell and had to be slung over a Royal Guard’s back when the poor Border Guard collapsed on the spot, and with disturbing meekness, the Changelings accepted being paired up into the ‘secured’ rooms, all marked with steel doors painted a dark crimson hue and loaded with as many spells and charms as the physical confines of the rooms would allow.

Doors, floors, walls, ceilings, even the bedding, mirrors and horrifyingly enough, the chamber-pots had been warded with every kind of spell from scrying and anti-teleportation wards to runes of paralysation and stunning. The Changelings merely took one look, gave a collective shrug and simply crawled into their beds, shedding their illusions in small flashes of green fire that set half a dozen strings of runes in each room flaring for several seconds before the Magi on hoof sent the counter-runes into play and cancelled the alarms.

“Slightly … overprotective of your little Ponies, aren’t you?” Chrysalis coughed, smiling sadly as the Changeling ‘Guards’ who were carrying her pushed on to the ambassador room, where the Magi who had not been sent out to collect the Changelings said Bleak Mountain awaited, along with the castle physician who had been summoned, hopefully discreetly, when the Night Guard had broken off from their patrol over the ‘refugees’ and retired to their normal duties.

“They are my children, in a way. I will defend them from any dangers, from within or without.” Celestia replied, mentally wincing at the heat and bluntness of her words. Easy, Celestia. Whatever her flaws and crimes, Chrysalis was the one to reach out to you for peace. Do not let stress and fear make you drive her away, or into a corner where she has no other option but to lash out. “Once we … make peace, I suspect our greatest trial will be finding you and your Hive proper lodgings without causing the more skittish residents of the Castle throwing hissy-fits at their new neighbours. The red rooms were designed for hostile guests to Equestria, and do not provide the comfort and amenities that a race seeking amicable relations with Equestria deserves.”

“My my, already assuming we’ll be bossum buddies, even before my trial is concluded?”

“In the five thousand years of my life, Queen Chrysalis, I have come up against many would-be emperors, tyrants and warlords and turned them to the path of peace and harmony.” The Solar Monarch locked her eyes on the swimming green orbs of the Changeling Queen, whose wan smile quickly faded into a thin, frightened line at the intensity that bored down at her from the Alicorn’s gaze. “I have turned thieves and bandits into beloved heroes of the people, convinced necromancers and demon-cultists into becoming humble farmers and helped the most damned of souls find peace with themselves and their pasts.”

“You are not the first, nor hardly the worst, reprobate to spend your time recuperating under my roof. If it will save your life, and ensure continued peace and prosperity for both our peoples, you can believe that I will make a friend out of you.”

“Hip-hip-hooray for friendship then.” The Changeling replied weakly as the door to the ambassador’s room opened in a shimmer of the electric-blue magic of Bleak Mountain’s telekinesis, where the hooded leader of the Magi awaited, along with a rather ruffled-looking Bedside Manner, the Royal Physician, did a double-take as he finally saw his ‘patient’.

Chapter 45 (Heavy Clop)

CHAPTER 45

“Ah, Fluttershy, not that ah’m judgin’ … but what in the absolute buck?” The orange farm-pony whispered, trying her best to not move despite the very large object that was inside her and the delightful feeling of having her cramping inner muscles finally having something to grab.

Of course, waking up ass-to-ass with Fluttershy was also quite disconcerting, but then again she had sort of lost consciousness in the shower, and she did vaguely remember being carried out between Zecora and Fluttershy … and even vaguer impressions after that!

“Y-y-you, uhm, you s-s-said that you needed help with your fake estrus, a-a-and you’d worn Zecora out at the time, so I-I went and got something special from my … my root-cellar … a-a-and you kind of jumped me and used it on me … not that I’m mad.” Fluttershy squeaked from the other end of the bed, shifting awkwardly in a way that made whatever was inside Applejack move and twist in a delightful way. “S-s-s-so if you co-could please hold still f-for a little while? If that’s okay? If you don’t mind?”

“Girl, ah ain’t mad that we knocked cooters. Ahm downright ashamed ah took advantage of you in mah current state, but if this is a deel-dough, can’t we just, y’know, pull it out natural-like?”

“We’re both knotted, we can’t.”

“Beg pardon, darlin’, but ah don’t plum think ah heard y’all right. We’re what-now?”

“Kn-knotted. It’s the d-double-diamond-dog-dildo, the D4, Alpha model.” Fluttershy squeaked, wriggling again that made the dildo inside Applejack push and press against all sorts of interesting places. “You … uhm … you kind of used all of my ones on Zecora, s-s-so I had to go and grab something from my stock …”

“Ah did? Huh, that explains the weird dream ‘bout stuffin’ pickles into a barrel tha’ wouldn’t stay still.”

“I think we’d better get Zecora to Nurse Redheart, otherwise she’ll never be able to go number two again.”

“Ahm gonna regret this, buh why?”

“Because my ass is not a store that needs to be stocked! Thanks to you, my asshole is blocked!” Zecora yelled from the floor … somewhere, and when Applejack lifted her head off the pillow and told herself she had most certainly not heard the adorable mewling noise Fluttershy made when Applejack moved, she could finally see Zecora, laying face-down on the ground with her front-legs tied together underneath her, her ass stuck up in the air and her hind-legs spread out and tied to opposite ends of a rather long stick … with what appeared to be no less than seven large, colourful, rubbery things that had no business being anywhere near a Pony’s private places sticking a considerable distance into the air from underneath her tail, the largest of which was still defiantly wiggling of it’s own accord. “If you two could stop not-humping and please pull them out, because I must pee and you bound my hooves, you apple-bucking lout!”

“Good Goobering Faust! Zecora, ah did that to you?” Applejack recoiled in both horror and surprise, which forced her hind-quarters hard up against Fluttershy’s again, which in-turn caused the two Ponies to gasp as the ‘toy’ inside them bent and flexed again.

“At first it was a delight, you’re skilled Applejack, but then I said ‘more’ and you attacked this one’s crack! As fun as it was, and as full as I am, please pull these things out, I’m in somewhat of a jam!”

“Puh-please duh-don’t move like thaaaaaaaaaaaaat, Applejack!” Mewling softly, Fluttershy put the lie to her own words as she vainly pumped back against the slightly larger and far heavier Applejack, doing little more than make some soft squelching noises in the process.

“Uh, right, jus’ … give me a minute to process this …” The bewildered Farm-pony said after a few moments of trying to make sense of what had happened, and gave it up as a bad joke. Must’ve gone plum outta mah mind from the fake estruss and no sleep, like when ah tried to tend to the farm all on mah lonesome. First things first, gotta pull away from Fluttershy, then go untie Zecora, then go drink some hard cider till ah forget all ‘bout this.

Yet as Applejack pulled herself off the bed, she found to her surprise, and guilty delight, that Fluttershy came with her. Literally. The butter-coloured Pegasus whimpered and thrashed as the pair of knots inside the locked pair pulled on her inner depths, a sensation that Applejack had to admit wasn’t that bad an experience, and a surge of wetness flooded over Applejack’s own nethers as Applejack literally dragged Fluttershy over to the edge of the bed through their ‘connection’.

“… ‘Kay. Once more, an’ please try to hold back, Fluttershy …” Blushing furiously, Applejack managed to get both forelimbs onto the ground, then a hind-leg, then the other … only to feel Fluttershy’s hind-legs rub up against hers as the Pegasus tried to get up with her. “No no, Fluttershy, y’all stay there, ah’ll get up an’ try to pull away.”

“O-okay.” Fluttershy whispered back.

Applejack took another step towards Zecora … and sighed as she felt the knot inside her tug for a half-second before Fluttershy’s dripping sex smushed against her own, both of them still forced partially open by the deviant toy that connected them.

“Fluttershy …”

“I … I can’t! It’s the Alpha M-model! The knots a-are the size of a tennis-ball! It needs to come out slowly, or we c-could hurt ourselves.”

“Well, sugarcube, y’all are feelin’ wetter than a beaver’s livin’ room to me right now. Ahm fairly certain if’n y’all just grab something, like that bed, or a doorknob, ah kin just pull us apart likety split.”

“M-maybe if we could … uh-uhm, make it a little bit more … wetter? Wuh-we could try then?”

“…Y’all jus’ wanna ride, don’t yah, Fluttershy.”

“…Yes.”

Zecora groaned and closed her eyes, hips shuddering and rolling of their own accord. “Just buck her senseless and then pull out, I need to use the bathroom and these knots are stout!”

“Land’s sake.” Applejack muttered, bracing herself and rapidly battering her rear into Fluttershy’s, the butter-coloured Pegasus gasping and groaning as the deviant toy inside them both pounded away at their depths, the large knots that made up the center-piece pummelling their nether-lips deliciously as Applejack put all her talent for bucking trees to work, vibrating her inner muscles, twerking her hips, pulling out all the stops as she tried to work either herself or Fluttershy free of their entanglement as her otherwise impossibly-shy friend thrashed and moaned like a wild thing, slamming her hips back against Applejack with reckless abandon before finally, Applejack felt the pressure inside her shift and a particularly hard thrust sent Fluttershy sprawling onto the bed, while Applejack staggered forwards, unbalanced without the counterweight of another Pony behind her … and landed on the floor next to the bound Zebra. “Well … ow … guess that solves one problem.”

“Agaaaaaaiiiiinnnn.” Fluttershy mewled from the bed, the glistening neon-blue toy sticking out lewdly from under her tail, and Applejack blanched when she caught sight of the girth of the toy that had so recently been intimate with her depths.

Sweet Filly-Foolin’ Faust’s left plot-cheek! Fluttershy weren’t kiddin’ bout the size o’ them knots! Groaning, Applejack got to her hooves and started working on the releases of the knots that held Zecora in bondage, wincing as she started working on the hind-legs and noticed the ridged nature of the ‘big one’ that Zecora had mentioned, which still stubbornly vibrated amidst the nest of it’s ‘comrades’. “Jus’ a sec, Zecora, ah’ll have y’all loose in a second. Uh, y’all gonna need a hoof getting’ them … things … outta yah?”

“Grateful I am for my timely release, but your hooves are going no-where near my crease!” Zecora grunted, staggering to her hooves and shaking them to restore feeling. “No grudge do I bear nor shame do I feel, but out of my way or the paint I will peel!”

“When yah gotta go …” The farm-pony muttered as the Zebra took off towards Fluttershy’s bathroom, her backside clattering with latex and rubber. “Gonna need a lot o’ cider fer this one-eeeeeeeeeeeeeigh!”

Gasping and throwing her head into the air in shock as she felt her crease penetrated, and with vigor at that, Applejack craned her head around to stare behind at the panting face of Fluttershy, half-hidden behind rigid wings and an uplifted tail, the Pony who had just rammed infernal blue toy back inside her in one thrust, the slick second knot rudely spreading her wide-open as it nestled in just past her opening.

“Agaaaaaaaaain.” Fluttershy mewled, pressing herself up hard against Applejack to the point the blushing farm-pony could feel both of their lips twitching against one another as their bodies struggled to contain the toy that had, once again, locked them together.

“Oh mah staaaaars …” Applejack groaned, slapping a hoof over her face. “Mah always did say it were the quiet ones yah gotta watch out for. Once more, Fluttershy, then tha’s it. Ah gotta keep mah strength for later today.”

“Wh-why?” Fluttershy whimpered as the two Mares began to hesitantly tug at their connection, moving first in one direction, then another as they enjoyed the strange but pleasant sensation of the rubber knots inside them and the thick shafts rubbing away at their insides, tails splaying over each other’s backs as Applejack gave up any hope of having any sanity in her morning and decided that working herself up into a lather with Fluttershy wasn’t the worst way to start a day.

“’Cause ah need to see Rarity ‘bout some free dental work ‘fore the day is done.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So … uhm …” Twilight asked nervously as Filthy Rich put the last few items across the scanner and began printing out the receipt. It had taken a good ten minutes to get the whole load sorted and scanned, and throughout the entire process he had talked nothing but shop.

“A moment, your highness.” Filthy said calmly as he handed the last bag to Luna, who likewise looked nervous but accepted the load and put it into the last of the trolleys. “I’m many things. A father, a loyal Pony of Equestria, but I am also a business-stallion. I have a rule about mixing business with … personal issues. It becomes too messy for all parties involved.”

“A wise way of thinking.” Princess Luna murmured, eying a can of salty plums longingly. “It can be impossible to make calm and rational decisions when one cannot separate their private and public selves.”

“Once we’ve concluded our business here, I and several other Ponies wish to make a house-call, your Majesties …” Filth Rich’s voice trailed off as both he and Twilight watched with wide eyes as Luna reached a hoof into her own mane, up to the shoulder, and moved the limb around for several moments before withdrawing a large sack, from which she began pulling out platinum bits to pay for the shopping.

And since a single platinum bit was worth as much as fifty gold bits, and the sack was almost as large as the Alicorn’s own head, it meant that Princess Luna truly had a small fortune on hoof …

“Uh … does it have to be … today?” Twilight spluttered, trying to regain some control over the conversation as Luna handed over five platinum bits, and Filthy Rich took them with near-reverence on his face, slipping them into the money-drawer and counting out the change, to which Luna shook her head and tapped the charity-tin next to the register. “I may have some Ponies coming over once the sun comes up, but I also kind of don’t know who they are, or when they will be coming, so I can’t really promise I’ll be free at all today …”

“The Royal Agents? Oh, we’ll be there around nine-ish, give or take five or ten minutes.”

Now Luna and Twilight gaped at Filthy Rich, who simply gave them a small smile and a shrug of his shoulders.

“That you didn’t notice means I’m doing my job correctly, your Majesty.” The brown-coated Pony gave both Princesses a short half-bow, eyes dancing with mirth as he spoke. “Our orders were explicit: Do not approach Twilight Sparkle with evidence of our allegiance unless her life, or the lives of the other Element Bearers, was at obvious risk, and do our best to ensure you and the other Element Bearers are free to pursue your own goals at your own pace.”

“But what about the Ursur Minor? Trixie?” Twilight spluttered indignantly, while Luna simply sighed and covered her face with a hoof.

“Your Majesty, I am an Earth Pony. A very well trained one, but still just an Earth Pony. With a family. While Princess Celestia has stationed some … combat-proficient Ponies to watch over you, for the most part, Royal Agents are not typically chosen for their ability to fight, but rather to think on their hooves and blend into the background.” Filthy Rich countered, pointing an immaculate hoof towards the back of his store, where his family’s ancestral house leaned against the newer building like a decrepit relative. “My family has served the Solar Throne for a very, very long time, and when we were tasked to watch over Ponyville, we set out to become an integral part of the community, to help shape it and protect it from within. My jumping out into the fray like some kind of superhero would achieve little more than getting my own plot hoofed to me on a silver platter, and worse still, might reveal that the Riches have been Royal Agents all along, and maybe even reveal the true identities of the other Royal Agents in Ponyville.”

“And that would be an issue because …” The Lunar Princess rumbled, giving the Royal Agent a dire look as Twilight Sparkle looked like she’d just eaten something very disagreeable to her palate.

“Royal Agents might do wonders for the safety of the nation and the people of the nation, your Majesty, but in the past hundred years a great many novels and movies have taken extraordinary pains to paint the Royal Agents as a corrupt order, a zealous group that oppresses and supresses Ponies within Equestria to support an equally-corrupt Monarchy, generally with the protagonists almost always belonging to the Unicorn Nobility.” Filthy Rich explained as he locked up the checkout and escorted the two stunned Princesses to the door. “It’s clearly the efforts of Nobles who own significant shares in the film-houses and printing-houses to try to paint the Thrones in a negative light, but Equestria hasn’t been in a state of war in over three centuries.”

“To today’s Ponies, war is something somepony else has to suffer, not them. Criminals and fanatical religious cults are a thing found outside of Equestria’s borders. Ponies don’t understand what real tyranny and conflict is, and so they eat up this dramatic nonsense from the public media as gospel and, well, here we are, cleaning up after a fiend attacked our town, and half the town thinks it was either a publicity stunt or they’re more worried about who they’re going to sue than thanking Faust their friends and families made it out alive.”

“Imagine trying to do your job with half the people you’re trying to protect assigning malevolent intentions to your every action. And the other half unwilling to trust you because they are scared of social pressure from other Ponies, or being reported on if they should bend the laws a little to keep bread on their tables?” The brown-coated stallion sighed gustily as he held the door open as the two Princesses pushed their loaded trolleys out into the street, still looking somewhat stunned. “Royal Agents are only effective because we keep out of sight and out of mind. A thought I hope the both of you will keep at the fore-front of your minds in the coming days. Our lives could depend upon it.”

Twilight and Luna shared a look of startled confusion as the automated doors hissed shut behind them, and then the lights in the store switched off, leaving them alone on the street with only the gentle light of the moon and stars overhead to guide them home.

“Oh. Buck.”

“Indeed, Twilight. Oh buck indeed.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Honey? Did you want something from the town? We’ll have to swap locomotives for the next leg of the trip and it will take about an hour to prepare the new locomotive for the trip, and we did kind of leave the Crystal Empire in a hurry …”

“… Cupcakes. See if anypony has got any strawberry cupcakes.” Cadence sighed from the bed in the Royal Carriage, as listless as she had been hours ago when she’s let loose and told Shining all about her fears.

Much as he wanted to be there while she was so lost and upset, Shining knew that in these kinds of situations, doing something productive was more useful than just sitting there and waiting at her side. It would also be more productive to get the guards up to speed and warn them that whatever Cadence asked for was to be provided as soon as possible, barring anything that might cause a war between Equestria and the Crystal Empire.

“I’ll do my damndest, sweetheart. If not, I’m sure we’ve got enough supplies I can whip you up some in the kitchen.”

“Shining, the last time you tried to make me breakfast in bed, you nearly set fire to the castle kitchen. A crystal kitchen. Composed mostly of theoretically unflammable materials.” A ghost of a smile graced his wife’s face as the pink Alicorn lifted her head off the pillows to give him a firm look. “Although if there’s any pancake mix … I’m sure there’s got to be a twenty-four-seven store somewhere around here.”

“Understood, my lady.” Shining made a flamboyant bow, and received a pillow to the face for his efforts when he raised his head, along with a delicate chuckle. “We’ll be departing in a few hours, if the schedule hold true. I’ll see if there’s any early-edition newspapers while I’m out, just to see what exactly we are running into. If Celestia is keeping the Changelings’ surrender quiet, the last thing we want to do is be the cause of a mass panic by arriving with horns blazing and giving the bugs a chance to disappear into the chaos.”

Retreating from the royal bedroom and chuckling as his mind absently recalled ancient laws that would declare the entire contraption as a state-within-a-state, effectively a mobile piece of Crystal Empire territory and thus inviolate should matters turn sour in Canterlot, Shining gathered the assembled Royal Guards, Crystal or otherwise, and briefed them on the situation.

The Crystal Ponies and most of the normal Ponies immediately saluted, although a handful of his kind seemed to resist for a few seconds, and Shining immediately asked them to hang back for ‘additional orders’.

Once the rest of the Guards had filed out, and hopefully gotten enough distance that sound would not carry, Shining gave the remaining Stallions a pointed look. “Alright lads, we’ve served together through thick and thin, and I know that look. No rank here, but what’s crawled up your plots?”

“Shining.” Flash Sentry said after a few moments of awkward silence as the non-Crystal Royal Guards shared unhappy looks. “Look, we get that we’re supposed to be helping the Crystal Ponies. We get that the Crystal Ponies need a lot of help to get back on their hooves, and that the Changelings are a threat to everypony, everywhere. But we signed on to the Guard’s as defenders of Equestria. If this mission could cause a diplomatic incident like you just warned us about, shouldn’t we be on Equestria’s side of things, not the Crystal Empire’s?”

Shining leaned back against the wall, hoping the flare of irritation and contempt he felt hadn’t shown on his face. But if that was what Flash Sentry felt about his new posting, that would explain why his actions over the past few months had been so dreadful.

“Peaceful relations between Equestria and the Crystal Empire is vital for both nations to continue to grow, both as nations and as part of the world in general. Need I remind you that with the return of the Crystal Empire, and the restoration of the Crystal Heart that functions as a magical capacitor, helping to spread the energies of Harmony and Love across the planet, we are standing on the cusp of an age of peace and tolerance unlike anything in recorded history? If we sour relations between Equestria and the Crystal Empire, or give the Crystal Ponies reason to cut off contact with the outside world, those energies could diminish, or worse yet, become corrupted. Imagine a world bathed in corrupted love energies infusing everything and everyone. Imagine living in that kind of world.” The Royal Consort gave the troublesome Pegasus, and then the rest of the reluctant guards, a searching look as they shuffled on their hooves and ducked their heads to avoid his gaze. “If you truly cannot accept your roles here in the Crystal Empire, feel free to deliver a request for transferral to my desk after this mission is concluded. I’ll happily sign them rather than force you to remain at a post where you cannot give your all … but I will also state your reasons for the request. Captain Rosebush deserves to know the truth, at the very least.”

“Oh buck me, Shining, you know that little filly will just rubber-stamp whatever you give her simply because it came from you, and if you say you can’t trust our commitment, she’ll just roll us out of the Guards faster than you can say ‘Notice me, Sempai’.” Flash Sentry muttered darkly, feathers ruffling with irritation. “Just say we’re getting the boot if we don’t go along with whatever crazy scheme your wife has come up with and get it over with.”

“Rosebush is a soldier, Flash, and a pony you could have learned a great deal from if you focused more on what was between her ears than what was between her legs.” The white-coated Unicorn shot back, earning a few sickly chuckles from his reluctant troops. “I won’t lie, Rosebush will probably assign you to less-critical posts if you request reassignment, but you are unlikely to get drummed out of the Royal Guard, Flash’s misadventures with mares in positions of power notwithstanding.”

This earned more laughter, less strained this time, and a hearty “Fuck you too, Shining.” From Flash Sentry.

“If that’s all, dismissed, and back to your duties. We’ve a great deal to get done while the next locomotive is prepared for us, and I want us at Canterlot as soon as possible, we’re already thirty-seven hours away and the sooner we get there, the sooner we can stop the Changelings from … whatever it is they are planning.” Shining gave his fellow Royal Guards a crisp salute, and felt a twinge of bitter pride as all but Flash Sentry returned it seconds later.

They were good Ponies. Stallions he’d risked his life alongside many times. Many of them were as good as family, and he had always been welcomed into their homes during the holidays when he hadn’t been able to come home to Canterlot while out on rotation.

It was going to be hard to lose them.

Even if those reassignment forms never appeared on his desk, he would have to reassign them himself, neither he nor the Crystal Empire could afford to have troops who possessed divided loyalties, let alone those same divided loyalties within senior officers who had been instrumental in helping to train an entire army from the ground up. Certainly, almost all of them would be returning to Canterlot with glowing recommendations … but his honor as an officer, and his duty as a Royal Consort, demanded nothing less than brutal honesty, and that would slow, if not cripple, their climb up the ranks in the Royal Guards.

Shining Armor sighed heavily, sat down a lushly-padded bench and rubbed at his eyes with both fore-hooves. He loved Cadence dearly, but there were times he wished that the Crystal Empire, and Equestria itself for that matter, had stayed out of their lives, where he wouldn’t have to balance the needs of nations against the flaws of his friends and comrades.

Twilight, nearly turned into a fiend and he’d been half a continent away. His wife barely holding on, he could see the wounds the wedding and her imprisonment by the Changelings had left on her mind already starting to open up again. Princess Celestia welcoming some of the most treacherous, dangerous individuals on the face of the planet into the very city they’d once tried to besiege the day after fighting said fiend and only narrowly winning.

It was all too much, too soon, focused on too few Ponies, all of whom he loved dearly.

But if Chrysalis truly was planning something … Shining looked up and focused, a bead of sweat appearing on his temples as his horn remained stubbornly unlit for precious seconds … and a small bubble of his pinkish-red shield-magic appeared before him.

It was tiny, barely the size of a pea, and wouldn’t hold up against a physical attack for more than a few seconds. But this shield was more offensive than defensive. Letters to his father, self-training from the manuals Night Light had sent him, had helped Shining master at least this much of the Empty Horn style of casting.

His ‘shield-pellets’ could shred reinforced concrete, but the volume of pellets he needed to cast to be truly effective precluded his own fumblings with the core of the Empty Horn’s teachings, he just could not keep his aura suppressed and cast the spell to shoot the shield-pellets at the same time. Maybe with a few more months of training, he could pull off the required amount of control to meld the two very distinct spells together.

But to conjure a single pellet invisibly? That he could do.

And if Chrysalis truly intended harm, he’d squash her like the bug she was, and nopony would ever know.

His duty as a Royal Guard, and the love of his wife, demanded nothing else.

Chapter 46

CHAPTER 46

Dawn came, a little later than usual but a minute here or there was expected after such a monumental battle such as what Ponyville had endured, and Canterlot buzzed as Ponies talked about the events of the other day as the sun rose above the horizon, slowly creeping across the sky and bathing the world and all life on Equuis with warm, life-giving golden rays.

In the coffee-shops and back-rooms of businesses, news of Celestia and her Royal Guard fighting a Demon-Pony in a little Podunk town now considered the stomping grounds of the country’s latest Goddess flittered between Ponies, the story growing more and more outlandish with each retelling.

Radio-Jocks seeking higher ratings ranted about the ‘brutality’ against Earth Ponies by the Unicorn Royal Guards, and soon found themselves inundated with outraged call-ins on the public radio stations about how those same Earth Ponies had refused to obey a Royal Edict to flee the battle by scores of Ponyville inhabitants, who were in turn called ‘sheep’ and royal apologists by the same radio-hosts in desperate attempts to defend themselves and their jobs.

The return of Sunset Shimmer, a Pony long since considered either dead or missing by most of Canterlot, a known Unicorn supremacist and arrogant sorcerer, as a Demon-Pony that had been tentatively identified as a Succuponi by Princess Twilight Sparkle and Princess Luna, had caused a plethora of self-appointed ‘experts’ on the field of demonology to clog the air-waves and pages of newspapers with conflicting accounts of their abilities.

This in turn caused a short-lived frenzy of Ponies buying gold in bulk to ward their homes with before an actual expert managed to get ahold of several radio and television stations and passed on the information that gold only neutralized the power of a Fiend when the Fiend wore the metal and was not a charm against the powers of Tartarus. News that came too late to prevent an abnormal hike in gold-prices on the stock-market that would take weeks to stabilize within the economy, considering that the jewellers and money-lenders who had sold the gold were refusing to buy it back except at exorbitant mark-ups, which in turn left hundreds of her citizens with a mountain of gold that was worth a fortune, but that they could not actually use due to long-standing laws against the use of unminted gold as a form of currency.

It was enough to make Celestia just want to take off with Discord to some secluded beach and drink something fruity and alcoholic out of a coconut until her Ponies forgot she even existed. Or until she figured out a way to rule fairly and justly without half the population apparently deciding that meant she was asking them to abuse her good intentions for personal agendas or to swindle their fellow Ponies.

Thank Faust and the Powersthat nopony saw the Changelings. Celestia sighed heartily as she turned to stare at the report from the Royal Physician, a rather skinny algae-green Unicorn stallion called Bedside Manner, and reminded herself rather firmly that she needed a clear mind to make sense of this particularly corundum, and that would preclude nipping down to the Royal Distillery for a bottle of vodka or nine.

Deep-tissue scans of the Changeling Queen, and then her fellow Changelings for comparison, had raised more questions than they had delivered answers. With the aid of the unflappable Candy Apple, yet another member of the ever-present Apple-Clan, keeping Queen Chrysalis in-line and docile, several samples had been procured from the Changelings for comparison. At the urgings of Bleak Mountain himself, all of the strange Pony-like bug-creatures had been scanned, probed, needled, squeezed and prodded by Bedside Manner and a battery of Third and Fourth Circle Magi, profoundly irritating the bug-like Ponies, or Pony-like bugs, in the process as the leader of the Magi abused the situation vigorously with his usual cold efficiency and hunger for knowledge.

The only Changelings who had avoided the barrage of tests had been the three foals, as much from Candy Apple’s quiet promise of ruthless vengeance if so much as a cross look was so much as directed at the three adorable foals as Celestia being unwilling to expose innocent lives to such trauma and ordering Bleak Mountain and Bedside Manner to leave them alone.

And according to the report … Changelings shared a ridiculous amount of physical similarities with Ponies. A disturbing amount of similarities, really, for a species that apparently had been created across the inhospitable Badlands by some unknown individual that Chrysalis had only referred to as The Empress.

The way the Drones’ bodies were laid out was almost identical to that of a normal Pony, including the hollowed bones of a Pegasi and the keratin- and nerve-rich horns of Unicorn, with small alterations to the muscles in the torso that allowed the use of their insectile wings, and skin that shared a frightening amount of similarities with the skin of several species of octopus over the top of the thin, segmented, light-weight carpace they all seemed to possess, allowing them their ability to change their colouration and small alterations to their natural shape, which combined with their magical abilities, made them perfect infiltrators.

Unless there was a properly aligned detection rune or a Magi actively scanning for their energy signature nearby, once the tell-tale flash of green Changeling ‘fire’ had swept over their bodies, a Changeling was all but indistinguishable from a Pony.

Queen Chrysalis herself posed an entirely different problem, however, as Candy Apple’s prognosis proved to be accurate: Many of Chrysalis’s internal organs showed heavy bruising, and judging from their positions, had been knocked loose from their internal moorings during her battles with Twilight Sparkle, Shining Armor and Cadence, their new, jumbled positions only causing more health-issues to the battered Changeling Queen.

What made things even more difficult and disturbing is that Chrysalis had more organs than she needed, including an atrophied-but-functional uterus that shared an entrance with a truly insectile organ that apparently was her ‘primary’ reproductive organ and an equally underdeveloped digestive tract squashed under a gigantic, multi-chambered organ that both Bleak Mountain and Bedside Manner tentatively identified as some sort of organic magical ‘stomach’ of some kind that took the transmuted emotional energy that Changelings ‘harvested’ and turned it into everything a Changeling could need to continue to live, as well as other strange ‘doubled’ sets of mismatched, alien organs.

“Well, this report promises that Chrysalis isn’t going to keel over anytime in the next month or so, so long as we keep her warm, fed and secure.” Captain Rosebush muttered darkly, sharing Celestia’s distaste for the report, but for no-doubt different reasons. “But it also says that she’s going to need to go under the knife to ‘fix’ the damage to her internal organs and re-anchor them so she’s not spending every day bleeding out internally and burning all of her stolen love energy just to regenerate the damage. So our trial either needs to happen now, and we have her fixed up afterwards, regardless of if the trial decides if she’s safe to keep within Equestria’s borders or you banish her to the moon, or we risk trying to heal her now and have a fully-restored Changeling Queen on display when this goes to the Royal Court.”

“I just finished explaining that, Captain Rosebush. And you know this is going to turn into a three-ring circus once the media hears about this.” Bedside Manner added, flinching slightly as Rosebush gave him a sour look. “Personally, I would recommend holding the trial first, getting it over with and then tending to the Changeling Queen. The longer we leave her injuries untreated the greater the risk she’s going to suffer a stroke at the very least from all that blood pooling in her torso, especially if she becomes stressed or incurs any more injuries.”

“I would have thought you would recommend treating her now, rather than leaving her injured, doctor.” The Solar Monarch turned her attention to her physician, who bowed slightly as his eyes met hers and then glued themselves to the lush carpet on the floor.

“I am sworn to do no harm, your majesty. And as much as it pains me to leave anypony, or anything for that matter, in physical distress, consider that the public may be less inclined to form a mob and launch an assault on the castle if we have to wheel the Changeling Queen into the court on a stretcher, obviously badly injured and with no chance of doing harm to anypony. Playing up the fact the Changelings are now passive and utterly defeated could completely avert a riot within the city, prevent injuries amongst the general populace and help portray you and your Royal Guards as merciful and gentle defenders, rather than specist bullies like the public media is trying so very hard to force into the public mind today.”

Celestia gave her physician an appraising gaze, while Rosebush huffed and looked away in annoyance. “Truly, Bedside, I think I might be keeping you from your true calling. The PR Department could use a Pony like you.”

“I thank you, your Radiance, but I prefer to heal lives, not soothe the fragile tempers of your fickle subjects.” The doctor said softly, refusing to meet Celestia’s eyes. “At the same point, I would heartily recommend the trial is kept closed to the public, even if reporters are allowed in. Undue stress, or a single blow to the Queen in her weakened state could force our hooves. If her body is put under any further pressure, the delicate balance she enjoys now could fail irrevocably, and this is an alien species I am dealing with here.”

“Even with the aid of Bleak Mountain and the best doctors in Equestria, I can only tentatively promise the Changeling Queen’s survival. If we’re forced to operate in a hurry, however, all bets are off. Additionally, we have no idea how Changeling biology will react to medication and medical spells designed for Ponies, so there is a very high chance we might end up killing the Queen on the operating table due to an allergic reaction or complications post-operation that would be easily avoided if we were dealing with a normal Pon.”

Celestia nodded, resisting the urge to sigh again, and turned to Rosebush, who fluffed up visibly as her Princess’s gaze focused on her.

“And Princess Cadence and Royal Consort Shining Armor? What is their estimated time of arrival?”

“Majesty, they are roughly thirty-three hours out after a stop-over at a changing station, after their original locomotive suffered engine troubles, and assuming they keep their current speed and heading, they should arrive sometime in the afternoon, the day after tomorrow.” Rosebush said smoothly, quickly flicking her eyes down over a sheaf of papers held in one hoof. “Our shortage of Dragon’s Fire has limited our contact with them to telegraphs alone, but Shining Armor has passed on the information that both he and Princess Cadence intend to petition you to oust the Changelings immediately upon their arrival.”

“Did you not pass on the information that Chrysalis bears news of a potentially hostile nation on the other side of the Badlands?” Celestia asked as Bedside Manner began to gather up his bizarre report from the table and reassemble them into the overstressed manilla folder, the Solar Monarch trying to not feel sick as her eyes caught a picture of Chrysalis’s internal injuries, captured by spell and transposed onto a large sheet of glossy paper in grotesque accuracy.

“We’ve left the message at their next planned stop-over, your Majesty, but … well, we’ve all read the file on Princess Cadence’s issues with Changelings after the wedding. It would take a miracle for her to be willing to be in the same room with a single Changeling Drone, let alone consider peaceful relations with their Queen after the mental trauma she has endured. If you ask me, I don’t think she should be anywhere near the Changeling Queen without a anti-magic shackle slapped on her horn.” Rosebush muttered the last words, almost as if to herself. “Not that I blame her. Filthy green cockroach laying her hooves all over Shining …”

“I will handle Cadence, Faust knows I had to do enough of that during her ‘phases’ during puberty.” The Solar Monarch rolled her eyes, earning a chuckle from Bedside Manner and a sharp look from Rosebush at both of them. “Shining Armor I will trust to act with the restraint and honor of a Guardspony, but Cadence has always been rather emotional when it comes to issues of trust, especially given her … history. The part that concerns me more is having her and Shining Armor on the witness stand and giving their testimonies to the court. Cadence has tremendous pull with the Ponies of Equestria, and I shudder to think of the damage she could do if she urges my little Ponies to rash action because of her hatred for Chrysalis.”

“We could delay the broadcast by five minutes or so, that will give us enough time to edit on the fly if we have an … issue during the proceedings.” The Captain of the Royal Guard offered, scratching at her chin in thought with a forehoof.

“That might work, but consider there is significant pressure from the Nobility to paint Princess Celestia and the Thrones in general as manipulative despots.” Bedside Manner pointed out, flinching again as Rosebush glared at him for offering a counter-proposal. “A direct, unedited feed from the courtroom would do wonders for proving we are hiding nothing from the public, which will undercut the Nobility’s claims in the public eye.”

“Unless Chrysalis does or says something wrong. Or Cadence does. Or somepony slips a bomb in on one of the reporters and …” Rosebush snapped back before Celestia slammed a hoof on the ground, making both Ponies jump in place and shoot her startled looks.

“I will decide how the trial of the Changelings will proceed, once I am aware of Cadence’s and Shining Armor’s intentions. Which I will ask them directly once they enter Canterlot.” Celestia said, loudly and firmly, as the two very different Ponies bowed to her, immediately contrite. “Given that this trial will have a monumental effect on the future of Equestria and the Crystal Empire, coupled with all the other issues the Crown is dealing with at the moment, it will likely take the better part of a week before the Royal Lawyers can prepare for the trial … which leads me to a very unpalatable decision.”

“Oh no …” Rosebush groaned, wings drooping as she took a guess to what Princess Celestia was talking about.

“Unfortunately, Captain Rosebush, we are going to have to put our attempts to drag Bluebone to justice on hold, again, until the Changeling Trial can be concluded. He will be officially barred from leaving the country until his turn at the stand comes, but at least we can still keep his assets under lock and key until then.” Mane and tail rippling with their own private wind, Celestia fixed a stern look on Rosebush as she spoke. “Take the opportunity to liase with Night Light and Thunderwing, and do everything in your power to hunt down this mysterious Pony who hired the mercenaries to kidnap Twilight’s father. I want everypony, everybeing, who was involved in this disaster brought into the light, no matter whose hooves you have to tread on. I will handle any backlash you receive, and take full responsibility, but I want this ‘middle pony’ and whoever is assisting them to answer for these crimes.”

“Somepony organized a kidnapping of a Pony, in my city. They hired mercenaries who felt absolutely no fear of assaulting my Royal Guards. They then attempted to use forbidden magic to kill those same mercenaries in one of the most heavily warded areas of my castle.” Celestia felt the colors in her mane turning more orange and red, the temperature in the room rising dramatically as she spoke, but for the first time in millennia, she didn’t panic that her control was slipping, indeed she felt somehow … liberated as she felt the heat of the sun inside her flare up alongside her anger and outrage, allowed the barest trace of her real power to seep out past the heavy barriers she had built up day after day for just under five thousand years. Only the look of absolute terror on the faces of her two little Ponies and the smell of ozone made Celestia reel in her full power, her mane returning to its normal three shades and her face smoothing into its usual pleasant mask. “Whatever resources you require will be made available. Whatever Ponies need to be brought in to get results will be made available. I want this mysterious ‘middle-pony’ found, Captain Rosebush, and I want them alive.”

“Majesty!” Captain Rosebush snapped to attention and saluted crisply, a remarkable feat considering how pale her face had gotten and the way her wings trembled, and Bedside Manner just bowed until his muzzle nearly kissed the floor, both Ponies scrambling for the door with as much dignity as they could muster.

Control, Celestia. Control, control, always you must be in control. The Solar Monarch berated herself, sealing her true power tightly behind fortifications both mental and mystical, forcing down the energy of the sun like it was a coiled spring deep in the core of her being until she could barely stand the strain. You remember what happened the last time you unleashed your power without the regalia! You swore an oath to the Primarch, you swore an oath in blood to not allow it to happen again, and just this much stress almost caused you to unleash the sun right before two of the most loyal Ponies of their generation!

A quick glance at the room showed that her … flare … had caused the nearest pieces of paper to turn a crinkly yellow-brown from the heat, the careful script on them still legible, thank Faust, and where her hooves had rested, four faint semi-circles appeared on the marble floor, slightly darker than the stone around them.

Faust give me strength, and Powersgrant me the wisdom to carry on amongst the Mortals. The Solar Monarch cursed, reaching for a bell on her table that would summon a servant, whom would carry a very special request to the armory. I had hoped to not have to wear that infernal contraption till the trial at least! Let us hope merely a few more pieces of my Regalia will be all I need, and not the full set!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Come on, come on, getcha plots in gear!” Granny Smith hollered from the back of the wagon, waving her cane in the air as Big Mac and Rainbow Dash limped out the front door.

Literally limped. Rainbow could have sworn she’d dislocated at least one hip, and Big Mac was moving like he’d run a marathon at the very least. The complete lack of sleep both had suffered, as well as the mortification of Granny Smith walking in on them and asking them to get on with it, she wanted those great-grandfoals lickety-slit, also made them leery of going anywhere near the batty old Mare.

“Comin’, Granny.” Big Mac groaned, stopping to yawn heavily as the burly farm-horse finally got down the steps from the porch, fatigue obvious in his posture, voice and the huge bags under his eyes.

“I might just fly, if that’s okay? Kind of … well I’m …” Rainbow hemmed and hawed, before finally just saying “I don’t think I’ll be sitting much today.”

“Don’t care! Great grandfoals at last!” The old matriarch hooted, making both Wonderbolt and Farm-Pony groan out loud and cover their faces with their hooves.

“Granny, no! It was jus’ a one-time thing, jus’ somethin’ bad in the cake. Poor Applejack got it bad too.” The burly red farm-pony explained again as he hooked himself into the business-end of the wagon, tugging experimentally at the connections before turning to speak quietly to Granny Smith. Rainbow was aware, painfully so, that the trip from Sweet Apple Acres to Ponville was a good half-hour’s walk normally, but Rainbow would have bet her last glass of cider it would take at least twice that long today with the damage she and Big Mac had inflicted on each other last night.

Faust knew, Rainbow was certain she would be flying slow enough that even Derpy would be able to beat her in a race, and that was just muscle-strain from her wings being extended for so long. The concept of using anything south of her navel for any extended period of time just made her want to curl up on the ground and cry right now, giving the brash Pegasus a whole new measure of sympathy for the burly Stallion who was going to have to pull a sodding heavy wooden wagon into town.

Thankfully, Applejack’s ‘secret stash’ had contained more than just sex-toys. A hoof-ful of pills, stamped with the universal sign for birth-control, would hopefully put the kibosh to Granny Smith’s dreams of great grandfoals, and if not, Rainbow had jars of the damn things back at her cloud-mansion for her own previous adventures with her 'Friends with Benefits'. As ‘fun’ as Rarity’s prank had been, Rainbow had dreams about joining the Wonderbolts, and the Wonderbolts, being a military unit, had strict rules about members of their unit and offspring.

“H-hey, what’s up guys?” Rainbow whipped her head around, wincing as sore muscles protested as she caught sight of three very wet, very tired-looking Fillies trudging towards them, wearing their beloved Cutiemark Crusader cloaks and carrying a large box across all three of their backs.

“N-nothin’ much, jus’ takin’ Granny into town to see Twilight an’ thank her fer savin’ Applejack yesterday.” Big Mac grunted, nervously pacing on the spot as he eyed the three Crusaders and shot Rainbow a terrified look.

Buck. Looks like the aphrodisiacs in the cake did affect the Crusaders. Rarity, you’re gonna be shitting teeth for a week for this! The Wonderbolt Trainee cursed mentally as she slowly flapped over to the Crusaders and took the chest off them, earning three grateful looks in the process. “So … what's the deal with the box? Cutiemark Crusader Porters?”

“Something we have to return to Applejack … and it's something we need to talk to Twilight about.” Sweetie Belle muttered darkly, scowling at the chest, and then Scootaloo who giggled something under her breath that made both the stunted Pegasus and her bow-wearing Farm-filly friend blush scarlet.

“Riiiight. Well, hop on to the wagon, keep Granny Smith company, and don’t believe a word she says about great grandfoals, okay?”

“Grandfoals? But don’t you have to … heeek!” Whatever Applebloom was about to say was lost to Sweetie Belle swatting her with the Unicorn’s tail, and the three Crusaders shooting each other startled looks. “S-so you an’ Big Mac …”

“Ended up the same as your three after Rarity’s cake sent us all round the twist, I'm betting.” Rainbow finished, giving Sweetie Belle an apologetic look at the little Unicorn’s face twisted into an ugly scowl. “At least you three won’t need the morning-after pills. Uh, speaking of which, we should probably sit down, you three, Applejack and me and talk about how friends deal with having … encounters … with their friends. I figure the Crusaders might need somepony to talk to after your adventures last night, somepony who've experienced the same sort of situation.”

“I'd bet you've never gone through anything like what we did last night.” Scootaloo muttered, earning paired tail-swats from the other Crusaders and loud shushing.

“Bet on what, squirt?”

“Th-the talk with AJ? K-kinda awkward to have that talk with my own sister, right?” Applebloom stammered, sounding far too bright and chipper all of a sudden.

“… Right. Look, we’ll talk later. First of all, we’ve gotta get to Twilight’s library, then … my hooves have got a date with Rarity’s face. Sorry, Sweetie Belle.”

“Oh, I’m not offended.” The young Unicorn said as her two friends staggered over to the wagon, blushing as Granny Smith laughed at them and began to, horrifyingly enough, ramble on about her ‘adventures’ when she was younger with her favourite cousin, much to the obvious terror of the Ponies around her. “But if you don’t give her at least one hoof to the face for me at least, I will be most upset with you.”

“…Heh. I knew I liked you, kid.” Rainbow chortled as she picked up the Unicorn, ignoring the squirming as just shyness after what Rainbow imagined was an eye-opening adventure for the Cutiemark Crusaders as she clutched the filly to her barrel, fluttering over to the rest of the group and dropped Sweetie Belle into the back of the wagon with her friends before taking point overhead as Big Mac began the slow march into town.

Chapter 47

CHAPTER 47

“Are you sure you don’t want us to stay in Ponyville, your Majesty? Or at least me?” The last of the Pegasi Royal Guards asked plaintively, head poking out of the doorway on the carriage as the conductor walked up and down the platform, checking for Ponies who were running late for the morning trip.

“I wouldn’t send you away under normal circumstances, but given that we lack the facilities to properly house you, Guardspony, asking you to remain on duty here would be rather cruel.” Princess Luna explained as Twilight waved goodbye to the rest of the Pegasi, who moped sadly or frantically waved back at her from their seats, all clearly wanting to stay in Ponyville, to stay with Twilight. “Also, you flew for hours under sustained recovery spells and then went comatose for over twenty hours. I want you all to undergo a full physical when you return to Canterlot, and I have sent a scroll through Sir Spike’s dragonflame that you are all to be placed on light duties until such time as you receive an all-clear report from the Royal Physician.”

“But … but your Majesty, we’re fine! We are all a little sore, yes, but we’re fine! We can service, I mean serve, just fine!” The guard protested vainly, staring vainly at Twilight with big, sad, puppy-dog eyes as the Conductor gave the final boarding call.

“You flew the entire way from Canterlot to Ponyville, carrying double the amount of passengers you are supposed to, at full speed and under the effects of spells that unnaturally force a body to recover from strain and injury. I will not risk any of you developing hairline wing-fractures or torn ligaments by pushing you even further after such a display. You have done your duty and done it well my friend, so now rest and recuperate. Equestria will need you, all of you, in the days to come.” Luna said with finality, trying not to break out into giggles as the Pegasi whined pitifully as he was pushed back into the carriage by the extremely unimpressed conductor, the train slowly pulling away and the Pegasi within all scrambling back through the carriage to press their faces against the glass windows, waving hooves and mouthing words as the train slowly pulled away, chugging and tooting, towards distant Canterlot.

For close to a minute, the two Princesses watched the train depart, before giving each other a quick look and finally giving in, bursting into giggles and leaning against each other for support as the giggles turned into straight-up laughter.

“Well … it appears that while your ‘estrus’ might be a little more dangerous than we thought, Twilight.” Luna whispered after the two Princesses recovered some measure of dignity, prodding her marefriend in the ribs repeatedly as Twilight covered her face with both wings and a fore-hoof to hide her blush. “You are still close enough to a normal Pony for it to make Stallions ‘perky’ around the Mare, though thankfully not to the point they will simply try to mount you in the street!”

“I am so embarrassed. After what you said, I thought I was safe and stopped bothering to use the diffusion spell to disperse any musk I might be producing, but …” Twilight sighed heavily and pulled her wings away to bat playfully at Luna, who giggled again and half-jumped, half-flapped out of the way. “I’m just glad the only thing that happened was half a dozen Royal Guards asked me on a date. At the same time.”

“You did cast the spell again after Shimmerwing and Fluffy Socks started to hoof-wrestle over who had the right to ask you out formally first, yes?”

“No, I cast it a little while after the lot of them started hitting on me and I realized what was happening. A bit like shutting the gate after the horse has bolted, slur not intended to our equine cousins, but the term fits. So hopefully a score of blue-balled Pegasi is my sole contribution to Equestria’s woes today.”

“Believe me, Twilight, compared to what my sister will be facing today, a squad of love-struck Royal Guards is a non-issue. Still, we’ve only a half-hour before Filthy Rich brings over his … friends to your library, so I suggest we hurry home.” Luna ruffled her feathers and looked around, noting with a frown how deserted the train-station was. “If I may enquire, it’s well past sunrise, and the shops should be opening soon, so where is everypony?”

“I was a little more concerned about getting the Royal Guards out of our manes before somepony took to them with some rotten fruit, or they tried to put the moves on me again, but you’re right, now that I think about it.” Twilight muttered nervously as the two Alicorns took to their wings, flapping up and over the train-station and heading back to the Golden Oaks Library, eyes scanning the streets for Ponies.

A futile search, apparently. Apart from some pet cats lounging in trees or sitting behind windowsills, and a few crows that had come to scavenge out of garbage cans, there was nopony out, although plenty of businesses had their signs out on the streets and their chimneys puffed with smoke.

“Where is everypony?” Luna and Twilight said out loud as they banked and headed down towards the Library.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“No, we will not throw the Princesses out of town! Carrot Top, you will come to order or so help me …”

“… have the proof right before your eyes, we’ve been under attack ever since Nightmare Moon appeared and that purple witch came to our town! Every other month, without fail, something terrible happens, and it’s all Twilight’s fault, you just …”

The Town Hall was uncomfortably cramped as scores of Ponyville citizens crammed themselves inside to listen to the shouting match between a knot of Ponies led by Carrot Top and Mayor Mare and her beleagurered army of civil servants, the mob whispering and muttering to themselves as the argument turned from unpleasantly uncivil to outright hostile.

“We’ve got a petition! You have to do it, we elected you!”

“Sixteen signatures DOES NOT CONSTITUTE a petition! You need at least a hundred signatures, achieved without coercion might I add Carrot Top, for the petition to be considered legally viable, and then it would have to go to a vote involving the entire town, where we would need at least a fifty-one percent vote in favour of your idiocy to even consider it!”

“Dang. Carrot Top’s really going ahead with this?” Lyra muttered to Bon-Bon, the other Mare sighing and nodding. “Isn’t she already facing charges for …”

“Violating a Royal Edict to flee Ponyville and assaulting a Royal Guard … with a vegetable.” Bon-Bon rolled her eyes as one of the infamous Golden Carrots flew through the air, lodging itself in Mayor Mare’s mane point-first like some hideously oversized hair-ornament, which prompted a chorus of shocked gasps from the civil servants, and then a shout of outrage from Carrot Top as her beloved vegetable was plucked from the Mayor’s hair by the long-suffering leader of the town and dramatically thrown into the trash ‘Where it belonged’.

“So she’s pouring oil on the fire?” Her marefriend whispered as Carrot Top was tackled to the ground by her supporters before she could throw herself bodily at Mayor Mare and was dragged, kicking and spitting, towards a side-exit, swearing she’d be back with the remaining signatures for her petition, and another one calling for Mayor Mare’s dismissal.

“Eh, probably trying to cause grief like she always does and doesn’t care she’s just digging a deeper hole for herself. Mare can’t stand to be on the losing side, you know that, she’s been like that since we were all foals. Remember when Big Mac refused to go out with her? She’s been after the Apple family ever since.” The sweet-maker rolled her shoulders in a sleepy shrug and yawned. “Orrrrr … maybe the idiot thought if she could drum up enough support to get Twilight banished from the town, she could leverage the petition against spending a few weeks in Horseshoe Bay.”

“…Did Carrot Top forget Twilight’s basically BFFs with the Goddess who raises the freakin’ sun and has ruled our country for thousands of years?”

“Like I said, she’s an idiot.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay, so, Spike … where is Trixie? And do we have any coffee, we may have guests in the next fifteen minutes or so.” Twilight asked, rushing around the library’s ground floor, pulling curtains across the windows and straightening the throw-cushions up on the reading couches.

“The Long and Girthy Dixie is in the shower, and has been for the past twenty minutes while you two were out seeing Twilight’s new fan-club off. Coffee … uh … we’ve got some Gryphon Blend from your last late-night study-binge, Twilight, and thanks to your ‘shopping trip’ last night, there’s enough snacks to last till the apocalypse.” The young Drake rolled his eyes in disgust, having already done that work while the two Princesses were seeing the dopey Pegasi off earlier, and swatting Luna’s hoof with a claw when the Lunar Princess reached for his can-opener. “Luna! No salty plums, I’ve got plans for them!”

“But my saaaaaaaaalty pluuuuuuuuuuuums!” Luna whined, pulling the offending hoof back and giving Spike a pleading look that would have likely given him a blood-sugar related disease if he hadn’t built up an immunity over the years from exposure to Fluttershy and Rarity.

“No! Besides, I’ll be using several cans to make some pies with them later, so you need to w-wuurgh!” Spike’s lecture ended in a startled gurgle as Luna wrapped a forelimb around him, unfortunately falling around his neck, and pulled him into a bone-crushing hug, squealing delightedly.

“Salty plum piiiiiiiieeeeeee! I haven’t had a home-made salty plum pie in millennia! Oh, Sir Spike, if you were not already knighted, I would elevate you to the peerage on the spot for this! Please, please remember to use sweet pastry for the crust, to contrast with the salty plums, and clotted cream to top it, and …”

“Hrrrrrgkh!” Spike coughed, trying to pry the dusky-blue limb away from his throat as his vision began to blacken around the edges.

“Luna, Spike needs to breathe!” Blessed air flowed into Spike’s lungs as Twilight’s magic, a familiar, comforting prickle enveloped him and teleported him away from Luna’s death-grip and onto a couch on the other side of the room, the young drake falling back against the soft cushions and breathing heavily as he massaged his throat with a claw. “I get you like salty plums, but really!”

“Nay, thou dost not … I mean no, you don’t! Nopony uses them in Canterlot! I asked for them many, many times, and nopony would ever prepare them! Too simple for a Princess, the cooks said! Too crude for the royal palate!” Luna danced on the spot, delighted despite the words that came spilling out and the angry look on Twilight’s face. “And here, in this town, I find shelves of them, at such low prices! In their own fermented juices, no less! Tonight, I shall gorge myself on salty plums much as Celestia feasts on her jellies and custards and layer-cakes!”

“… Huh. Spike, is this what I’m like when we get a shipment of new books in?” Twilight whispered to her young assistant as Luna started to levitate cans of salty plums off the counter and snuggled them.

“In all fairness, you’re worse.” Spike coughed, rubbing at his throat and giving first Twilight, then the oblivious Luna, dirty looks. “And can you please go pull your admiring servant out of the shower before she uses up all of the hot water again? I’m due for my weekly soak, and I refuse to take a bath in anything less that a boiling-hot bubble bath.”

“Of course. And I’ll top up the flame-runes on the hot-water heater so the water is at the temperature you like.” Twilight giggled, rubbing her little brother-slash-assistant’s head-ridges with affection as the Drake grumbled about mammals and cold weather.

Of course, putting hooves on the stairwell prompted thoughts of a far less pleasant nature to pop up in Twilight’s mind. Trixie’s adoration of her being the most … difficult to process, and the most embarrassing seeing the showmare’s ‘spare limb’ rubbing feverishly against that of the sleeping Royal Guard who had glomped her in the hallway. Who had seemed rather delighted to have Luna and Twilight cast detection spell after detection spell on his lower half, much to the chagrin and jealousy of the rest of the Pegasi. Faust only knows what the rest of the Royal Guards thought was going on. "Hey, sorry, we're just checking to see if you picked up a Demonic Veneral Disease in your sleep, no worries though!" Gah!

And why is a Mare’s cock bigger than the Stallion’s? Curse you, Weeaboo, I don’t need this kind of confusion while I’m trying to sort out just what Luna and I are right now! Twilight thought to herself, blushing and telling her lower self to stop winking as she climbed the stairwell, wings drooping as she approached the upper levels where her private quarters were, including the bathroom. Okay, so. Tell a hermaphroditic Pony who had apparently developed a crush on me right as Luna and I are both in the middle of a false estrus that I don’t want to play the Pony-with-two-backs game despite my body sending out physical signals screaming ‘Yes!’, without breaking her heart or offending her … and my first kiss was less than three days ago. Buck me sideways, can’t I just go deal with an invasion or something else that's easy?

Twilight found herself cursing not only her own ignorance of dating, including never having read anything about the social customs of Ponies seeking mates, or turning down unwelcome advances, but also Rarity for the romance novels which seemed to always go into torrid detail of Ponies spiralling into despair when rejected, or plotting the downfall of their romantic rivals. And past encounters had proven that Trixie was at least as prone to lapses of common sense as Twilight herself was during her panic-attacks.

Except Trixie had the tendency to resort to hyperbole and enslaving entire towns…

Breathe, damn you, breathe! Twilight forced herself to go through an entire set of calming breath-exercises before tapping a hoof on the bathroom door … to no effect. Huh. I can hear the shower running … so where is Trixie?

Frantic thoughts wormed their way into Twilight’s brain as her hoof hovered over the handle: Trixie really was a Succuponi and this was all just a ruse, and a fully-matured Demon-Pony lurked on the other side of the door to k-kiss her and corrupt her. Trixie had tried to cast a spell in the shower, and the Magi in Canterlot had panicked and electrified her torc … under the hot water and flash-fried Trixie when the magic in her torc had misfired. Trixie had slipped, hooked her torc on something and had accidentally broken her own neck!

Risking it, Twilight cracked the door open enough to peer into the bathroom, coughing softly into her hoof as a rush of steam obscured her sight and filled her lungs. Thankfully, Trixie was occupied, washing coconut-scented body-wash into her coat.

Unfortunately, Twilight got a clear view of the shower-head firmly being levitated in and out of Trixie’s crease, and a second levitated wash-cloth rapidly moving up and down Trixie’s ‘attachment’. A very large and pink attachment with a flare big enough to make Twilight’s terrifying memories from the Dreamscape easily overpower whatever ‘fuzziness’ her false estrus was causing her to suffer.

I cleaned my face with that wash-cloth! I have to use that shower-head! Twilight screamed internally as she eased the door shut and backed away slowly, her face contorted into a rictus of alarm and embarrassment.

She still hadn’t gotten proof if Trixie was infectious or not, and right not the show-mare was polluting her bathroom! Sexually, no less! Frustrated and confused over what to do next, Twilight tried to think of what her friends would do … and remembered a lot of comments directed to Rainbow Dash, whose sex-drive was infamous amongst their circle of friends, needing a ‘cold shower’.

Looks like Spike is going to have to wait a bit for his soak. Twilight thought to herself, filled with an evil mirth as she teleported outside to the back of the Golden Oaks Library and trotted to the water-heater, half-hidden behind a living root, and cast a spell at it she had researched last night before futilely going to bed, in-case she ever needed to immobilize another Pony like Sunset Shimmer again and her tentacle spell wasn’t enough.

The temperature around her horn plummeted within seconds, the purple swirling energy around her horn followed moments later by an answering swirl around the hot-water heater, which had never been connected to the town’s underground gas-pipes due to the nature of it’s construction and fear of the living roots breaking the pipes and causing a disaster, Twilight’s face breaking into a victorious smirk as her magic encased the device in a thick case of ice, and counted down the seconds till she heard a blood-curdling shriek from her bathroom.

And once again, I owe Applejack a thank-you. A cold shower does apparently calm a raging libido! The smug purple Alicorn thought proudly as she dispelled the ice-cage and poured a trickle of power into the now-extinguished fire-runes on the underside of the water-heater, noting with more than a little relief that her internal magic reserves were now closer to half-full than the nearly-empty state she and Luna had been suffering in the Everfree Forest after their first ‘sparking’.

The ‘heating’ process would take several minutes yet, even with the fire-runes actively heating the water far more effectively than any gas-powered flame could, but still … hopefully, Twilight could drag Trixie out of the bathroom now, cast a plethora of disinfecting and cleansing spells and ready the bath-tub for her long-suffering assistant and hopefully set some ground-rules with her unwelcome house-guest about ‘personal time’ in the librarian’s quarters.

While it was highly unlikely that the transformation could be transmitted to Spike via whatever trace secretions Trixie was likely to leave behind, Spike was still a member of Twilight’s family, biology aside, and the new Alicorn would go to Tartarus and back to keep him safe.

And the thought of a hermaphroditic dragon rampaging around town sent shudders running up and down Twilight’s spine. Weeaboo’s scroll had gone on at-length about the abnormal sex-drives of his creations. The last thing Twilight wanted to document was how such impulses would react when combined with the unlimited growth-potential of a Dragon in the middle of a greed-frenzy.

Trotting back around the front of the Library, Twilight forced herself to wave cheerily at the sole Pony she saw, Derpy Hooves’s colt-friend, Time Turner, the awkward Stallion waving back with that odd pen-light of his before slipping around a corner, grinning like a loon.

I feel like this is all some elaborate hoax or something, and I’m going to sit down and Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash are going to leap out from behind a bush screaming about prank-wars. Twilight thought to herself as she opened the door and let herself into the library, ignoring the confused looks from Luna and Spike as she scrubbed her hooves on the floor-mat to remove any traces of dirt or grass.

“Spike, you bath is going to take a few minutes to get prepared. I need to … sanitize the bathroom, and have a chat with Trixie. Also I had to freeze the hot water heater and then recharge the fire-runes.”

“Why … no. You know what, no. I don’t wanna know.” The young drake said after several seconds of thought, turning around and throwing his hands into the air in disgust as he returned to the center of his power in the Library, the kitchen, while Luna looked on with bemusement.

“So that horrible scream was Trixie? Pray tell, what did you do to her?”

“I stuck my head in to check on her, and she was doing your trick with the shower-head to herself … and using my cleaning cloth to, uh, clean another part of herself very thoroughly.” Grinning slightly, Twilight leaned in close and whispered into Luna’s ear. “So I teleported outside and used Frosty Flake’s Foolproof Freezing spell on the hot-water heater.”

“Does that spell not unnaturally chill anything left within its grasp … oh. Oh. Truly, Twilight, that was genius, and also evil. The poor Mare, and I use the term as loosely as I can, will have a terrible cramp after this.”

“And I am going to be coming down from the bathroom smelling like bleach when the Royal Agents show up, because I am going to have to give everything a full disinfection and then …”

“Twilight, simply ask Trixie to clean the bathroom. She made the mess, let her earn her keep under your roof.” The Lunar Princess interrupted, draping a wing over Twilight’s shoulders as the smaller Alicorn began to shake and twitch in the beginnings of a panic-attack. “It will also keep her out of the way while the Royal Agents are here.”

“Luna, we don’t know if she’s infectious. What if she half-asses the cleansing spells or won’t properly clean the shower-head? Faust only knows what might happen if Trixie can breach the species-line and infect Spike, or worst still, one of us! With our false estrus and a possible Succuponi infection on-top of that, we’d go mad with lust and probably cause the eradication of all Ponykind!”

“Hence why Trixie will do the cleaning … and then I will go up and double-check her work. Unlike yourself, my Aspect is already firmly fixed and cannot be changed by anything less than one of the Powers themselves, and as a fully-Ascended Immortal I am less likely to be transformed accidentally by whatever traces of her eagerness to serve her Mistress Twilight that Trixie might leave behind.”

Putting a hoof to her face, Twilight sighed and began the breathing exercises that were becoming all-too-familiar to her.

“I still didn’t have a talk with her about … everything. You and me. Her. Our relationship. Ungh, why is this so awkward? How do I tell her ‘no’ without hurting Trixie?”

“In matters of the heart, Twilight, being hurt is all too common. That we have managed to thus far coast along without wounding one another or those around us is nothing short of a miracle. But then, we’re only less than a week into things.” Luna replied softly, leaning down until their foreheads were as close together as their horns would allow, her billowing mane and tail wrapping around Twilight like cool, satin-like blankets. “The sooner we let Trixie know we are likely to spend at least a year together and are trying to date, the sooner her heart can break, and then heal.”

“Let’s just hope she doesn’t try to take over Ponyville again to get over it …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first thing Celestia noticed about the mob was that there was a staggering number of cameras out in the crowd today, and somepony had apparently made the call to allow clouds to be brought in low to allow even more Ponies, mostly Pegasi but there were a few Unicorns with cloud-walking spells or enchanted horse-shoes sprinkled amongst them, to cram into the space beneath the balcony that had traditionally be used for the Thrones to speak to their little Ponies.

Tartarus on fire, there were even Ponies sitting on the roof of the castle wings with long-range cameras and recording devices …

Perhaps walking from the armory back to her quarters while wearing the cuirass and greaves along with her normal torc, crown and horse-shoes before heading out to address the nation hadn’t been the best idea, but given that it had been over three centuries since she had last worn anything more than the basic three pieces, Celestia had felt it necessary to get used to restrictions on her movement the armor would impose.

Being partially mystical in nature, the armor would always resize itself to fit her form, but the very fact she was wearing more pieces of her Regalia frightened Celestia on a level that was almost primal. The last time she had worn this much armor had been to almost single-hoofedly turn back an invasion by the Gryphons, and the only time in recorded history she had worn the full set had been during her fight with King Sombra. The times before that ... there had been nopony left to record that history.

Simply wearing this much felt like admitting her dream of global peace and harmony had failed …

“I welcome you, my little Ponies, though I sadly cannot wish you a good morning, for it is not.” Celestia began, hoping her face remained serene and untouched by her doubts and concerns. “As you are all no-doubt aware, yesterday morning, a fiend known as a Succuponi infiltrated Ponyville with the intent to try and corrupt our newest member of Equestria’s royalty, Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

“With a rapid deployment, two-score Unicorns from the Royal Guard and myself were able to contain the threat, however we were greatly hampered by a number of individuals from Ponyville who apparently did not understand that a Royal Edict is not a request or a sugestion, but the strictest command any Princess can deliver.” Eyes raking the crowd, she could see dozens of small flashes as the cameras captured her likeness, and Princess Celestia forced down the urge to ask them to wait. The sea of flashing lights was dazzling and distracting, and she could not afford to be at anything less than perfection today, or the papers would tear into her, and the Nobles would leverage every mistake in Court against her. “Despite multiple warnings to clear the area, when it became apparent that nothing less than my full focus would contain the Succuponi, the Royal Guards were forced to use their Taser-Spells to drive back the Ponies, including several reporters, from my side as I was channelling a stasis spell powerful enough that many Ponies here no-doubt saw the pillar of light all the way from Canterlot. A spell powerful enough that even I suffered tremendous harm, including bleeding from the horn, from channeling so much power.”

“So before we waste any more time on the matter, I will condense things for you, my little Ponies: Yes, the Royal Guards in question will face independent enquiries as per regulations whenever a Royal Guard comes into conflict with a civilian. Yes, the Ponies who are being charged with refusing to obey a Royal Edict will be given their chance to speak in an open court as to why they felt it necessary to risk not only their lives, but potentially the lives of everypony in Ponyville, by remaining near the site of battle despite multiple attempts to make them to leave the area. And yes, I am wearing a significant portion of my Regalia. You may now ask your questions.”

The crowd roared at her, a half-understood wave of sound that nearly forced Celestia back a step as hundreds of voices hammered at her with a hundred different questions before order was slowly restored by the hard-working Royal Guards, who selected half a dozen reporters from the crowd and gave them microphones that would allow their questions to be heard throughout the crowd.

“Your Majesty, your Majesty, Princess Celestia, is that really the Solar Regalia? Does this mean Equestria is going to war?” The first reported asked, the entire crowd wincing at his volume as his words blared at them from every angle.

“No, my little Pony, we are not going to war. Much as it pains me to wear this armor, and all the connotations that come with it, we have simply had far too many threats appear over the years for me to risk not wearing at least this much of my Regalia, enough that I can focus my full power without risking the backwash of power hurting those around me. Up until this point, I chose to not wear this armor because I wished to help bring about world peace and an end to needless conflicts.” Celestia responded, hoping that her words and intentions would actually reach the Ponies this time, and not merely be lost in the maelstrom of political scheming of the Noble factions and their media puppets. “But with the variety of supernatural and mystical attacks against Equestria in the past few years, I can no longer risk relying solely upon the Royal Guards and Magi alone to protect this nation, and all who dwell within it. As much as it pains me to bear the Regalia, I cannot allow innocents to be left in danger when a few pieces of armor will grant me the ability to safely focus the power of the sun itself without needing complex grounding circles.”

“Your Majesty, does this mean you’ve been risking the fate of the nation simply for your own peace of mind?” The next reporter asked, then flinched as Celestia’s eyes bored into him, the other reporters around him shrinking away from the Stallion and his ill-thought-out question.

“I am going to assume you meant that question with the best of intentions. No, young Stallion, I did not. Imagine yourself living outside of Equestria in another nation. Imagine you must get up every day with the understanding that only a short distance away, a powerful, wealthy nation is ruled by a powerful, immortal being who can freely move both Sun and Moon at her leisure, a rival nation whom you share a border with and one your ancestors have come into conflict with repeatedly in the past, and your people lost every time. If I were to appear before the leaders of the Minotaurs, the Gryphons, the Diamond Dogs or the other leaders of the world garbed for war and speaking of peace, they would either assume I was trying to trick them into lowering their defences before I invaded, or even worse, be utterly cowed by the threat of what I could do to their nations, to their peoples, if they refuse to accept my friendship and treaties.” The Solar Monarch ruffled her wings and tried to keep her features placid as the poor reporter nearly wilted on the spot under her gaze, and that of the assembled Ponies. “At best, I would come across as a benign tyrant and my little Ponies would be tarred with the same brush by a speciest mind. At worst, I and all of Equestria would appear as deadly hypocrites, offering friendship while bearing the tools of war, with the threat of eternal day or night for the world itself if our offers were refused. To best ensure peace for all nations, to prevent the needless loss of sons and daughters, mothers and fathers to the ravages of war, I put my Regalia away, shackled my power and met the leaders of the many nations and races whose world we share as an equal, no greater and no lesser than themselves. And for thousands of years, but a few brief and extraordinary moments in history, it has worked.”

“Today I wear just enough of my Regalia so that should another fiend enter our world and threaten its peoples, I can move immediately and on my own without drawing troops needed to protect the citizens of this nation to aid me. I am forced to wear this armor because yesterday I found that I can no longer count on my little Ponies to think and act rationally on their own.” Celestia continued, sighing heavily and with great feeling as she felt the eyes of the crowd on her more keenly than she had in centuries. “I wear the Regalia because I must now protect my little Ponies from themselves, from a generation who have lost their ability to understand when they are in mortal danger, from reckless individuals amongst our number who do not understand the laws of the land apply to everypony, including themselves.”

“Princess Celestia, what do you have to say to the other nations of the world? If one fiend can slip out of Tartarus, surely others can as well? Will you be leaving the nation to seal up the breach personally?”

Celestia paused to consider her next words carefully. Dictating terms to her own nation was one thing, but the other nations of the world had their own rulers, and their own way of handling matters within their own borders. And they would not take kindly to having her help forced on them, however beneficial her aid might be …

“No doubt the other nations of Equis have been watching the situation carefully, but I would urge them to double their watches on extraplanar activity. Once Sunset Shimmer reveals how she re-entered our world, I will share the information immediately with the leaders of the world, but until then all we can do is apply all of our resources to searching for portals, summoning circles and similar methods of calling entites up from the Prison-Plane, or even other layers of reality.” Wincing internally as she figuratively threw Sunset Shimmer to the wolves, Celestia continued to speak to her Ponies and hoping her voice remained calm and reassuring, not like the roiling pit of doubt in her belly or the flickering phantoms of fear and anger in her mind. “I suspect that, because Sunset Shimmer was not trapped in Tartarus, but had rather left Equestria through an ancient and poorly-understood artifact capable of bridging time and space, the normal countermeasures that prevent travel to and from Tartarus via magic failed to detect her passage. That said, the artifact she used is under heavy lock-and-key in one of the most secure places on the planet, which means our primary focus must be on learning how Sunset Shimmer was able to breach back into our world when the only method that is supposed to be able to achieve this is inert and surrounded by enough magical traps and counter-spells to immobilise an Alicorn or equivalent power.”

“Your Highness, where in the Succuponi right now? Back in Tartarus?” Another reported piped up, waving a recorder towards Celestia and scowling at the Royal Guards as they stepped forwards and forced her hoof, and the recorder, down and away from the Solar Monarch.

“Sunset Shimmer is currently incarcerated within the Cell of Ultimate Confinement, where her magic has been utterly neutralized until such time as we can glean information on how and where she was able to return to Equestria. During her travels, Sunset Shimmer partially transformed another Mare, and thus Princess Twilight Sparkle and Princess Luna are taking care of the poor soul. If Twilight’s theory is correct, the victim may hold the key to reversing fiendish transformations, and if this can be done safely, not only the victim, but even Sunset Shimmer herself may be able to be restored to their natural forms.” The Solar Monarch pointed a hoof out into the crowd for emphasis as she strove to calm her little Ponies’ minds and hearts. “If the theory is correct, and I have great faith in Twilight Sparkle’s abilities, then not only can those two Ponies be saved an eternity of languishing in the pits of Tartarus, but we may be able to create a magical ‘antidote’ if you will, a spell or a school of spells designed to neutralize or reverse fiendish transformations. I don’t need to explain how beneficial this would be not just for Ponykind, but all sentient life on the planet. We could effectively inoculate the world from future invasions from the Underrealm.”

“And now I must speak on another matter ... one that is thankfully far more agreeable to us all, I believe. Today, I am happy to announce that Queen Chrysalis, leader of the Changeling Swarm that attacked this very city several months ago has delivered herself to the Border Guard and surrendered her entire Hive to Equestria's courts, including herself and her newborn offspring." Celestia smiled benevolently down at her Ponies as the reporters who had been picked by the Royal Guards were all but torn down by their fellows, all of whom were demanding to ask their questions next, the Solar Monarch finding even herself forced to blink as the sea of Ponies before her exploded with the flashes of cameras. "There is no need to panic, I will answer all your questions, as I always have, and we have all day to do it if we need to take that long."

Chapter 48

CHAPTER 48

When Twilight heard the knock on the library door, she wasn’t quite sure what she was expecting from the Royal Agents. A bunch of cloaked ponies, some inexplicably self-propelled cardboard boxes, something equally absurd from one of Spike’s comics or some overblown spy-movie.

Filthy Rich, with a hoofful of Ponies behind him, carrying presents and a banner that read “Thank You For Saving Ponyville Again!” on her doorstep was not one of those scenarios.

“O-o-oh, I … uhm, yes, please, come in.” Twilight stammered and gave a quick, nervous smile to the group, holding the door open and stepping back as they funnelled into her home, chatting pleasantly and spread out around the room, separating yet still carrying on their conversations.

Each pony pulled a strange device from their manes, white orbs made from eight metal segments, roughly half the size of an apple with four short, stubby legs jutting from the lower segments, and placed them around the room. Windows, the entrance doorway and at the base of the stairs and the entrance to the kitchen. And they never stopped babbling until all the devices were set and at a nod from the still-talking Filthy Rich, lightly bopped the tops of the devices at the same time.

For a few precious seconds, Twilight felt … buzzy. That was the only way to explain the sensation, like her entire being had suddenly been transformed into a hive of angry bees all buzzing at each other, trapped in the shape of a Pony before the sensation passed and the room fell into a sudden silence.

“Scratch, are we in the green?” Filthy Rich asked loudly, eyes scanning the room before he bowed, first to Luna, then to Twilight, and then a short nod to Spike. “Our deepest apologies, Princesses, sir Spike, but we have to make the room safe enough to talk openly.”

“All good, Richie. The suppressors are working just fine, we’re clear against scrying sensors and listening spells.” ‘Scratch’, a white-coated mare with a two-toned blue mane and a black musical note on her hindquarters replied, winking at Twilight from behind a pair of rose-tinted sunglasses.

“Vinyl Scratch?” Twilight blurted out, blinking and rubbing her eyes to make sure she wasn’t seeing things. “DJ Pon-3 is a Royal Agent?”

“Believe me, your Majesty, you don’t know the half of it.” One of the other Ponies, another Mare with a dark grey mane and tail and a light grey coat with a violet-coloured musical note as her Cutie Mark muttered, flipping a bang of her mane out of her face.

“Octavia? What in the …”

“Twilight, breathe.” Luna whispered, trotting over to Twilight’s side and rubbing her back with a hoof as the purple princess began to splutter. “I am sure that the Royal Agents can introduce themselves …”

“Active Royal Agents, your Majesty.” Filthy Rich amended, chuckling softly. “The position of a Royal Agent if often passed down the family line, although not always. While everypony I brought with me is an active Royal Agent, there are a few more Ponies in town who have retired due to age or injuries. That said …”

Pointing a hoof at Vinyl Scratch, the brown-coated Stallion started the introductions. “First off, we have Vinyl Scratch, aka DJ Pon-3, our counter-espionage and magical counter-measures expert. Her partner, Octavia Melody, our field medic, primary infiltrator and … information extractor. Don’t ask about the last part.”

“Or do. I sort of owe the purple nurple for crashing my only chance to play at a Grand Galloping Gala.” Octavia muttered, shooting Twilight a dirty look before getting swatted on the flank by a giggling Vinyl.

“Moving on before this gets awkward …” Rich sighed in an exaggerated fashion and pointed out the next two ponies. “We have Snowflake, aka ‘Bulk Biceps’, our close-combat expert and go-to-Stallion for when things need to get physical. He’s also our odd-job specialist when something falls outside of our normal range of skill-sets.”

“Princess Luna, Princess Twilight, a pleasure to finally meet you.” The Stallion, with his white coat, massive body and oddly tiny hooves and wings, smiled warmly and bowed low, chuckling as Twilight and Spike gave him bug-eyed looks of shock. “The ‘YEAAAAH!’ stuff? Just an act to fool the rest of Ponyville. Makes them think I’ve got muscles between my ears too.”

“And next to him is Derpy Hooves, our aerial expert and our fire-support if things get hairy. She also handles aerial observation duties around town.” Filthy Rich pointed out the next pony, who was very familiar to Twilight and Spike, with her pale-grey coat, blonde mane, bubbles as a Cutie Mark and her infamous ‘derped’ eyes.

“Wait, wait, back that up for a second. Derpy Hooves, a Royal Agent? Why? How? I mean, she’s great, she’s a lovely Pony and Dinky literally can’t shut up about how much she loves her mom, but Derpy’s eyes …” Spike waved a claw in the air, looking utterly perplexed, while Luna and Twilight’s pupils had simply shrunken to pinpoints.

“This is why!” Derpy giggled, lifting a fore-hoof into the air and scrunching her face up. Before anyone could ask what she was doing, the room suddenly began to feel dry, and several ponies found themselves licking their lips or blinking their eyes to ease the sensations of dryness as a small cloud formed over Derpy’s upraised hoof.

Then she bopped the underside of the miniature cloud, and a small bolt of electricity shot up, leaving a small black scorch-mark on the library roof.

“Derpy Hooves is a certified vapormancer, although that’s a secret and I hope you’ll all keep it that way. Give Mrs Hooves some moisture in the air and she can whip you up anything from a cloud-bed to a fully-charged storm-cloud.” Filthy Rich chuckled as the young Drake smartened up and saluted Derpy, who giggled and saluted back, pompfing the mini-cloud against her head in the process and destroying it utterly. “I handle assignments, logistics and field support, such as providing materials the other Agents need to perform their assigned tasks or leaning on Ponies to look the other way if required. Unfortunately Time Turner and Ditch couldn’t make it today, they are both running interference for us with the sudden influx of reporters trying to snoop on yourselves, Princess Twilight, Princess Luna. Their efforts will have the reporters chasing ‘ghosts’ all day thanks to their efforts.”

“And pray tell, what do ‘Time Turner’ and ‘Ditch’ do?” Luna asked, rubbing Twilight’s back as the newest Princess flicked her gaze from Agent to Agent, silently mouthing ‘what?’ repeatedly.

“Yeah, doesn’t Time Turner maintain the town’s clock-tower? I thought he was just a watch-maker!” Spike muttered, obviously still distressed at blurting out why he thought Derpy couldn’t have been a Royal Agent.

“Time Turner is our technology expert, he keeps our gadgets from blowing up in our faces and maintains our private telegraph station for when we need to get a message to Canterlot on the double. Most of the time Vinyl Scratch can send our messages for us via Dragon’s Fire, and if a physical object needs to be sent, we rely on Derpy, but sometimes there are some messages that are too … damaging to risk with either of those methods.” The brown-coated Stallion grimaced and shrugged his shoulders. “The Nobility, as well as some of the bigger media companies for that matter, have strayed perilously close to breaking the laws on personal privacy, as you have been made painfully aware, Princess Twilight. Magical messages can be intercepted, after all, and Derp can’t just fly up to Princess Celestia and drop a parcel into her Highness’s lap. A private telegraph line allows Time Turner to deliver encoded messages safely and without risk of our identities becoming known to rogue elements within our nation.”

“Ditch is our … it’s difficult to say exactly what Ditch does in polite conversation, but let’s just say if a problem needs to disappear, or we need to keep something or somepony out of sight for a while, we call on Ditch. Otherwise, he generally keeps a low profile as he has infiltrated a nearby group to keep tabs on their antics, and if they learned he works for us he could be in a great deal of trouble.”

“And that is all of you? Seven Royal Agents? To oversee Ponyville’s safety and protect the Element Bearers?” Luna asked loudly, raising a thick eyebrow as the Royal Agents shared guilty looks before nodding. “Celestia had said she had the best team she could assemble watching over Ponyville years before Twilight came to this town, keeping an eye on the Castle of Two Sisters and the town, given that this was where I would likely reappear when my banishment ended. Forgive my doubts, but … just seven Ponies?”

“With all due respect, your Majesty, while we’re not the most combat-savvy team, we are perhaps one of the most deeply-embedded and invisible teams in the country. We also have a non-pony member in our group which attracts even more attention, and our operations is out in the boonies, no offence intended to the Element Bearers, but we are literally out in the boonies here. We were originally intended only to perform our normal duties of watching over the civilian population after all, nopony knew a damn thing about your return, only that Princess Celestia made it a priority for my team to watch the Everfree Forest for magical creatures.” Filthy Rich pointed out, frowning slightly at Luna’s tone. “Ponyville has perhaps a few hundred Ponies living here, and they all mostly know one-another. Slipping in more Royal Agents, and then trying to embed them into the community without drawing unnecessary attention to the Royal Agents already embedded here would have taken several months.”

“And then we have to factor in the biggest hurdle of all: Pinkie Diamena Pie. Every Pony who even passes through the town gets thrown a party and dragged around town until the Pink Terror feels they have found some friends, and when all the Royal Agents want to do is find a decent cover-story for themselves and hunker down to do their jobs …”

“We’ve actually had to alter the guide-book for Royal Agents in this part of Equestria, thanks to Pinkie Pie. Do not make eye-contact. Do not tell her you’re feeling down. Do not accept her offer of a party. Heck, poor Derpy and Snowflake here have to fly out of town to pick up supplies too dangerous to risk smuggling into town because Pinkie Pie has a tendency to zero in on anypony coming into town and you know she’s got no sense of personal space or restraint.” Vinyl Scratch pointed out, a wry grin on her face. “Faust knows, it took me and Octy here weeks to try and settle down into our roles in town after Pinkie Pie nabbed us and threw a surprise party with half the town present!”

“Do you have any idea how difficult it was to convince Ponies I actually came to Ponyville for peace and quiet when I live with the infamous DJ Pon-3? We actually had to make up the cover-story that we were in a relationship before Pinkie Pie would leave us alone!” Octavia added, shooting a dirty look at Vinyl, who simply grinned wider and rubbed a hoof on Octavia’s Cutie Mark, much to the embarrassment of the rest of the room.

“Hey. I’m not complaining! You know the strictest ones are the wildest under the covers!”

“Vinyl, if you do not remove that hoof and shut your mouth, you’re going to be the only mute, quadruple-amputee DJ on the club-scene.”

“Thankfully, the fact the two have always been in a purely physical relationship helped out.” Rich coughed and glared at the two Mares. Octavia sniffed and turned her head away with her muzzle in the air, and Vinyl grinned and retracted her hoof into a lazy salute. “Unfortunately, our … non-pony Agent would attract too much attention to visit today, but he is scheduled to come visit you in the next few days. Possibly when you and Luna return to the Everfree Forest? Derpy spotted you flying out of that infernal place with a wagon?”

“Yes we have some … supplies in the Everfree Forest to pick up. The tent is warded with magic designed to discourage all but the largest predators, but it is highly likely that a Chimera or a Dragon may have been drawn to the supplies we left behind in the portable hole.”

“Oh man, you’ve got to loan me that bad boy! I can think of a hell of a lot of freight-costs I’d save if I could just stuff all my gear into a portable hole and tuck it into a pocket.” Vinyl Scratch almost squee’d, bouncing on the spot till Octavia swatter her with her dark grey tail.

“I … think not. Mine is old, and the original from which all others were made. It is something of a … a personal item as well.”

“Wait, Princess Luna, are you telling me we left the original portable hole, the famous Fold of the Night Sky, tucked beneath a rock at our camp-site in the Everfree Forest?” Twilight whimpered, holding a hoof to her temple and sagging against Luna’s side as Vinyl Scratch made a similar noise of distress and sat down, hard, on the nearest couch.

“Folded up, the portable hole should be theoretically indestructible … unless it encounters a bag of holding, or maybe a rogue pocket of Wild Magic. Besides, Twilight, it is my creation. So long as it is somewhere on the continent, I will be able to sense its location.” Luna replied tartly, giving Twilight a none-too-gentle poke with a wing as the purple Princess muttered something dire under her breath. “For now, focus. I expect the Royal Agents have more important matters to deal with?”

“Yeeeeees, as a matter of fact. Last night we received a telegram from Canterlot that two very special Agents are being sent to help us … and they’re going to attract a lot of attention, attention that means there's going to be a lot of eyes on us all, and that makes me very nervous.” Filthy Rich explained, going to the door and peering out the small porthole window before blinking in surprise. “Oh. It appears Rarity has come to visit, Princess Twilight.”

“Oh no, I told them to come over this morning … should I stall while you all escape out the back?” Twilight offered, shaking her head and fluffing her wings as she tried to bring her mind back into proper focus. Today had been a doozy already …

“Actually, we do need to set up a buddy-system for the Element Bearers so they are paired with a Royal Agent, so this may be a blessing in disguise.” Rich replied, putting a hoof on the door-handle and looking back at Twilight. “With your permission, of course. As Royalty, you can override Canterlot Command’s orders.”

“…I leave the decision to Twilight. This is her town, and I will support her choices here.” Luna chipped in, nudging Twilight and grinning cheekily as Twilight shot her a dirty look.

“Gee, thanks for throwing me into the deep end, Luna. Uh … honestly, trying to keep things secret from my friends generally ends poorly, so yes, letting them know who the Royal Agents are and how things stand right now is probably for the best. Uh … my apologies in advance if Rarity goes into hysterics …”

“We’ve all read her file, your Majesty, we’re all well aware that Rarity is high-strung and prone to hysterics” Octavia sniffed dismissively, glaring at the doorway.

“… Right. Uh, best not to tell her about that, fair warning, she has a ‘thing’ about the negative aspects of her personality being known.” The purple Princess warned, walking over to Filthy Rich and cracking the door open slightly. “Hey Rarity, what’s …”

“Twilight Sparkle, you have to let me in! Our friends have gone mad and are trying to kill me!” Rarity shrieked in Twilight’s face, dancing from hoof to hoof as she scanned the sky nervously.

“… What did you do this time?” Twilight groaned, opening the door and then quickly conjuring a shield in the doorway as Rarity tried to force her way in.

“Twilight! Let me in, please!”

“Not until you tell me what is going on. I am not having Rainbow Dash knock another hole in my home because of some silly misunderstanding. Again.”

“I don’t know! Rainbow Dash keeps screaming about the apology-cake I had the Cakes make and send to Apple Acres last night, and when I ran over to Fluttershy’s place to take refuge, Fluttershy, Applejack and Zecora started throwing dildos at me and tried to run me down!”

“What.” Twilight grunted, going slightly cross-eyed as she tried to not imagine that in her mind’s eyes.

“It’s truuuuuuuue! Please, Twilight, you are my only sane friend left, you have to give me sanctuary!”

“Miss Twilight?” Twilight whipped her head around, glaring at the towel-wearing Trixie, who appeared to be levitating a hot-water bottle against her belly as she gingerly walked down the stairs. “Is it alright for the Humble and Apologetic Trixie to … you have guests?”

“Can I just have five minutes of sanity in this zoo, just once Faust, please?” Twilight muttered to herself before responding. “Not right now, Trixie, unless it’s urgent. We’re kind of in the middle of …”

“TWILIGHT! Twilight, you have to lower the barrier, she’s found me! Oh, woe is me, ruin is upon us!”

“Okay, Rarity, you need to dial it back, I am dealing with a considerable amount of … stuff … right now, so I don’t have the mental fortitude to handle this!” Twilight snapped, whipping her head back to glare at the white fashionista, who was pawing at the barrier, pouting and faux-sobbing.

There was also a faint, high-pitched whining noise that made Twilight’s ears twitch, a low sliver of noise that made her hair stand on end. A quick glance at the strange devices showed they weren’t the source of the noise, and it was only when Twilight looked back out the door she saw a black dot in the sky … growing bigger and bluer with every second.

“Is that Rainbow?” Twilight asked, rolling her eyes as Rarity blubbered and plastered herself against the barrier.

“She’s moving awful fast …” Spike pointed out as the blue dot slowly turned into Rainbow Dash, flying towards them at high-speed with a hoof out-stretched before her and both hind-legs flopping about in the wake of her passage. “Maybe we should let Rarity in, Twilight. I mean, the last time I saw Rainbow flying that fast, she was trying to pull off a Rainboom to demolish Applejack’s old barn.”

“Ple-he-he-heeeease!” Rarity added, pancaking her muzzle against the opaque barrier just inches from Twilight’s own.

“Rarity, what did you do?”

“Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii…” The faint noise grew louder, and Twilight could almost make it out now …

“Oh boy, back up against the walls, people, we’ve got Friendship incoming.” Filthy Rich shouted, running back from the doorway as the Royal Agents flattened themselves against the living wooden walls of the library, and even Luna took a few steps back from the door, no-doubt remembering her last encounter with Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Applejack.

“Oh please, Twilight, oh please oh puh-lease oh puh-huh-leeeeeease!” Rarity gibbered in a low-pitched tone, now facing the rapidly-approaching Pegasus with her back smushed up against the barrier.

“…iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii…”

“Thar she is!” Twilight grimaced as she saw Big Mac pulling a wagon with Granny Smith and the Cutiemark Crusaders in the back of it, snorting angrily as he limped towards the Library with the three teenagers in the back shaking their hooves at either Twilight or Rarity, she couldn’t tell, and tottering just a few meters behind them was Applejack, Zecora and Fluttershy, all with murder written across their faces. “Get ‘er!”

“Me or Rarity?” Twilight hollered, ignoring Rarity’s blubbering and Trixie’s hesitant ‘What’s going on?’ as the altered Unicorn came halfway down the steps.

“Twilight, MOVE!” Spike yelled, grabbing Twilight’s fore-leg and hauling her to the side of the doorway, moments before the Rainbow Dash slammed into Rarity, hoof-first into Rarity’s belly.

“…IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH!” Rainbow screamed, slamming into Rarity and punching through Twilight’s barrier with a sound not-unlike glass shattering, the two forming a rapidly-spinning ball of cyan-blue and off-white that roared into the room, bouncing up the stairs and collecting the horrified Trixie in the process before their progress was abruptly halted with a loud thump that shook half the books off their shelves, the ball of Ponies finally stopped by a very solid wall somewhere in the second level of the tree-library.

For almost a minute there was no noise at all in the library but the faint creak of the front door's hinges as it swung back and forth several times before the door was pushing back firmly by Applejack, the orange farm-mare tottering into the room with a grim expression on her face.

“Mornin’ Twi. Mornin’ Luna. Mornin’ Spike. Hey … y’all? What’s goin’ on, an’ where’s Rarity gotten to?” Applejack muttered, blinking eyes marred with large black circles under them at the additional Ponies in the room.

“Luna?” Twilight asked loudly, not bothering to shake off the terrified Drake clutching her leg as the rest of her friends pushing into her library, all in similar states to Applejack.

“Yes, Twilight?” Luna replied, nervously eyeing the motley assembly between the two Princesses.

“Would large quantities of alcohol negatively affect my Ascension?”

“…Nay.”

“Fan-tastic. That’s great news, since I have a feeling I’m going to be burning through a lot of hard cider before today is over.”

Chapter 49 (Rewritten)

CHAPTER 49

Applejack was used to life throwing her curve-balls. There always seemed to be a twist in the path of her life, be it a stubborn case of bark-rot right before growing season sweeping the farm, having to go into town to deal with more useless ‘motions’ put forwards by Spoiled Rich or Carrot top that would negatively affect her farm or her family, or even finding out a little too late that Big Mac had sold their last keg of hard cider to his mysterious buyer in Canterlot right when she needed something to take the edge off her day.

Finding Twilight’s house full of other Ponies was proving to be one of those curve-balls. One of the curviest of all time no less.

Having to help Twilight hold Rarity down as Nurse Redheart put the final touches to the full-body cast that Rarity would be wearing for at least the next few days was a nice consolation prize, but the farm-pony had kind of hoped to be the one to do the damage herself. Still, it was hilarious to see Rarity doing a very unenthusiastic impression of a paper-mache piñata, eyes rolling in horror at being wrapped up in plaster to prevent her injuries from being aggravated further. Rainbow Dash had somehow managed to deliver greenstick fractures to almost every bone in Rarity’s torso and pelvis and severe bruising to everything else in the region, but Rarity’s long-honed ability to go limp and faint on the spot had saved her from any further damage.

With a full battery healing spells twice a day to speed up her recuperation and total immobilization to prevent any further aggravation of her injuries, Rarity would be limping around under her own power within a week, and probably fully healed in a month, rather than the better part of a year in traction. Of course, that would mean Rarity would need to be carried to and from the bathroom and fed by somepony else while in her cast, but Nurse Redheart would likely be handling the former and Spike had begged to do the latter.

Of course, that also meant Rainbow Dash had the offending fore-limb in a cast for her own efforts and would likely not regain the full use of the limb for at least a month, since Ponyville’s sole Unicorn doctor would be focused entirely on Rarity’s injuries, and Trixie’s new golden torc was matched by a hard white neck-brace and a slightly-crooked horn.

All of which still didn’t make a lick of difference because Filthy Rich, Bulk Biceps, Derpy and those two music-Ponies wouldn’t leave despite every subtle hint that Fluttershy and Zecora gave, and Twilight was, strangely enough, either unwilling or unable to ask her other guests to leave. The last thing Applejack wanted was the townponies to hear about the disaster that had been last night, and the fact that Applebloom wouldn’t meet her big sister’s eyes, and the they had to talk to Twilight about that infernal box containing the bedamned Spell-Scroll sent shudders of terror up and down Applejack’s spine.

“But darling, you can’t just leave me with these brutes! I have so much to do! So many dresses to finish, and now I’ll be weeks behind schedule!” Rarity whined, pouting at Twilight, which was all she could do with her full-body cast immobilizing her.

“Rarity, you and I both know you won’t get many orders until at least the end of next month and everypony starts to want coats and hats for the start of winter, and I for one am going to get everypony involved in this madness to sit down, talk to me in a calm and rational manner and we are going to resolve this. Or so help me Faust, I am going to go take a page out of Rainbow Dash’s book and just start drinking until I don’t have the capacity for caring anymore and then I will solve this.” Twilight warned, glaring at Rarity, then the other Ponies in the room. “And I’m certain we all remember what happened the first and last time I tried to bring about friendship while hammered.”

“Heh, was a hoot seein’ you levitatin’ through town screamin’ ‘FRIENDSHIP!’ and throwing water-ballons filled with beer at people. Berry Punch still talks ‘bout it.” Granny Smith hooted, giving a gap-toothed grin as she settled herself down on a soaf, helped over and fussed over by Fluttershy, who looked over, met Applejack’s eyes and immediately blushed and looked away.

An’ that is gonna be a pain in mah kiester for a while yet, an’ ah ain’t talkin’ bout them knots. Dang it …

“Ah would prefer some privacy, Twi’. This is all kindsa awkward, an’ ah plum don’t fancy havin’ it bandied ‘round town.” Applejack finally gave up on subtlety and spoke up in a sour tone, glaring at Rarity, who blinked and quivered in her full-body cast from the heat of that look.

“Are we talking ‘everypony is going to make fun of me for weeks’ awkward or ‘I have to leave town and never come back’ awkward?” Spike offered, probably innocently, as Applejack, Zecora, Big Mac, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash all shared a look and said as one.

“The last one.”

“Whoooo boy. Rarity, I don’t know what you did, but this is … nyaaaaaagh!” Twilight began, before screaming and ruffling her mane with a hoof franticly. “Okay! Okay, that does it! I am sorry, Mister Rich, but I’m going to drag everypony involved in this madness upstairs and to what privacy I can offer, since somepony has apparently done something terrible enough to make no less than nine other ponies chase them through Ponyville and nearly kill her in the process of stopping her running away.”

“Very well, your Majesty. We’ll remain down here and keep ourselves occupied with … planning. But please, not too long, Princess Twilight.” Filthy Rich sighed and bowed slightly, as did the other four Ponies a heartbeat afterwards. “We cannot dither here all day, not without questions being asked that we can’t afford to answer…”

“Oh dear sweet Faust on a park-swing … understood, Mister Rich. Okay, everypony involved in this debacle, upstairs and …” Twilight’s pupils shrank to pin-pricks and a slasher-like smile appeared on her face as somepony knocked timidly on the door.

“I will get that.” Luna said loudly, putting a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder and pushing the manically-grinning Alicorn back towards the stairs. “The rest of you, get upstairs to Twilight’s bedroom, and take Lady Rarity and Twilight with you.”

“Yeesh.” Applejack muttered, nudging Twilight up the stairs as the over-stressed Twilight tittered insanely to herself. “Ah hope you’re proud of yourself, Rarity. Yer dumb prank’s caused nothin’ but grief fer all o’ us!”

“It was just a cake!” Rarity whined pitifully, grunting as Big Mac carried her up the stairs on his back, her outstretched limbs banging into the wall and railing of the staircase.

“If that was ‘just’ a cake, then I’m Tirek!” Rainbow Dash snapped back, hobbling awkwardly on three limbs behind Big Mac and his unwilling cargo.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good grief, what a morning! I am beginning to understand why my sister favours her bland, calming teas over a steaming mug of delicious coffee if this is what our little Ponies are like before the first quarter of the day is even finished!

Luna opened the door and blinked slowly as she found herself face-to-face with a pair of earth ponies, one gangly stallion with a stubble-covered jaw and a small, rotund mare, both of them looking utterly distraught and holding each other’s hooves desperately.

“A-ah! Princess Luna? U-uhm, we were wondering if … if Applejack is still present? We had Ponies tell us that she was chasing Rarity through the town.” The Stallion stammered, looking very pale even as he squeezed the Mare’s hoof.

“We’ve something of an apology to make, and hopefully some … restitution. Is it possible to speak to Applejack privately, your Majesty?” The Mare added, looking utterly mortified with the beginnings of tears in her eyes.

“Ah … is this by any chance pertaining to Lady Rarity and a certain cake?” Luna asked softly, and winced as she saw the two Ponies sag against one another. “Hmm, I see it is a … complicated matter. Well, currently Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Zecora, Big Mac and three young mares are up in Twilight’s private quarters hashing out the details. I suppose Twilight would be more than happy to speak to you if you are involved in this incident somehow.”

“Oh good goobering gobstoppers, honey, we tainted the Cutiemark Crusaders …” The Stallion whined pitifully, sagging against the Mare, who in turn went pale and whimpered, a soft animal noise of pain and distress.

“Errr …” Feeling equally awkward on her own behalf and sympathetic to the two Ponies, Luna gently urged them into the library where the pair took the steps with all the enthusiasm of a gryphon prisoner on their way to a meeting with their executioner.

“Welcome to the wonderful life of a Ponyville native, your Majesty.” Filthy Rich quipped from the other side of the library, where he had seated himself and picked up a mug of coffee with one hoof, and one of the jap-apple jam tarts, brought from his own store, and messily ate the treat, while the rest of the Royal Agents dove into the trays of snacks like they hadn’t eaten in days. “My suggestion? Eat now, because if this goes like it usually goes, we’ll all get caught up in the insanity for hours to come yet and miss lunch at the very least.”

“I see.” Luna replied dryly, shooting one last glance at the stairwell before levitating a tray of sweet over to herself, ignoring the sad eyes the three agents were giving her as she removed half of the food from the area and trotted over to the stairwell leading up to the private quarters of the Golden Oaks library. “Then I had best make sure that Twilight and her friends eat properly before the ‘insanity’ begins.”

“That’s okay, Princess Luna!” The Lunar Monarch yelped and almost dropped the tray as a pink hoof tapped her on the shoulder, Pinkie Pie bouncing past her with pannier-bags packed to the point of almost exploding, a huge grin on the pink earth pony’s face. “Mr and Mrs Cake wouldn’t tell me what was making them so upset, only that it involved Applejack, so I made my best apple-fritters and apple-tarts and apple-pies and apple-twists and …”

Continuing on in that vein, the ‘Pink Terror’ bounced up the stairs three at a time like some sort of bizarre reverse-slinky, leaving a wide-eyed group of Ponies in her wake.

“HOW?” Luna finally managed to force the words out, staring at the door, which she knew she had shut and locked behind the strange pair of Ponies. And she would have felt it if Pinkie Pie had manifested magic, chaotic, innate or otherwise.

“It’s Pinkie Pie.” Octavia sighed, snatching the last tart off the remaining tray and then fighting to bring it to her mouth as Vinyl Scratch tried to snatch the treat with her own hooves. “Ponies have gone insane from trying to figure out ‘how’ or ‘why’ with that Pony. Just accept that she doesn’t make sense and move forwards.”

“Mother Earth, preserve me.” Luna whispered to herself, and forced herself to start climbing the stairs, levitating the tray of tarts behind her. “I’m dating a Mare who lives in a town full of mad ponies.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After getting everypony seated and comfortable, including the now completely-immobilized Rarity, the teary-eyed Cakes, and making sure that Rainbow Dash knew any further assaults on anypony else in the room would result in Twilight teleporting Rainbow directly to Canterlot for a lecture from Celestia about the perils of relying upon physical violence, Twilight then had to thread the needle through the mob of ponies in her room to let Luna in, the anti-magic cores in the door-handle meaning that Luna could not both levitate the tray of tarts and manipulate the door at the same time.

“Well … I can honestly say that while this isn’t the weirdest morning in Ponyville we’ve all been involved in, it’s certainly in the top ten.” Twilight sighed, seating herself on the bed and being joined promptly by Luna. “So before this descends into our usual brand of chaos … Pinkie? No impromptu songs, party-cannons loaded with whipped-cream pies or confetti-filled whoopee-cushions. Rarity, no theatrics, I have only gotten three hours sleep in two days of complete and utter insanity, so I am probably due for a psychotic episode any minute now if I get pushed one more inch. Applejack… if Rainbow so much as twitches in Rarity’s direction, I want her tied up, and Fluttershy is to use the Stare on Rainbow until you think she’s calmed down.”

“Awwww…”

“Darling, you are really going there after refusing to help moi, and then watching as Rainbow assaulted me?”

“Gotcha, Twi. We’ll keep her in line.”

“You can count on us.”

“Hey! Ropes are one thing, but the Stare? That’s just cruel, Twilight!”

Twilight frowned at the rest of the room and glared down the complainers until the room was silent again.

“Rainbow Dash is crude, impulsive and prone to reckless action.” Twilight said, ignoring the snort of anger from the blue Pegasus as she looked right at Rarity, staring into the immobile Unicorn’s eyes. “That said, this is Rainbow Cirrus Dash, one of the most loyal Ponies in Equestria, if not the world. Pranks might be a hobby of hers, but actual physical violence against Ponies is not. I want to know what it was that you did, what would make Rainbow Dash risk her career with as a Reserve Wonderbolt to deliver a Sonic Rainboom punch to a civilian.”

“And let us not forget that Applejack, Fluttershy, Big Mac and the others were also in pursuit of Lady Rarity.” Luna pointed out, looking over the assembled Ponies with a wry smile on her face. “And judging from the way they were moving, they appear to have suffered physical injuries of some sort.”

“I hardly doubt chasing the Cutiemark Crusaders all night long warrants a response like this!” Rocking back and forth slightly in her immobilizing cast, Rarity spat the words back, glaring at Rainbow, whose own scowl only deepened.

“We weren’t chasin’ ‘em, Rarity, we were tryin’ to keep ‘em as far away from the homestead as we could! And ah can’t believe you’d put your own sister at risk for a prank like this, let alone doin’ it to yer friends!” Applejack stamped a fore-hoof angrily on the floor, spitting the words at the white-coated Unicorn. “We’re all damn lucky that Rainbow was able to distract Big Mac, else if he’d been ‘chasin’ the Cutiemark Crusaders, well ah don’t think ah need to tell y’all how badly that would have gotten.”

“I hardly think Big Mac would ever hurt the Crusaders, no matter how rambunctious they got!” Rarity shot back.

“Hurt ‘em? Land’s sake, y’idjit girl, if he’d caught ‘em after your damn cake-stunt, he’d have killed ‘em.” Now Granny Smith got into the argument, shaking her walker threateningly in Rarity’s direction. “He’s all in proportion, y’fool of a Mare! What didj’ah think would happen if’n he mounted ‘em?”

For several moments there was only silence as the entire room turned as one to stare in horror at the infamously blunt matriarch of the local Apple clan, mouths working silently, eyes bulging.

“WHAT?” Rarity shrieked, blushing and giving a horrified look at the assembled ponies before language apparently failed her and the fashionista descended into spluttering incoherency.

The Cutiemark Crusaders then apparently decided to do their best impression of hedge-hogs, planting their faces on the wooden floor and covering their heads with their hooves, whimpering and blushing madly, while Fluttershy, for her part, had turned a shade of pink that was almost neon before curling up into a ball.

“Granny!” Applejack hissed, pulling her hat down over her face as the farm-pony’s features paled at the thought, and Big Mac simply looked at his grandmother, blinked slowly and then joined the Cutiemark Crusaders in their new careers as pretend-hedge-hogs. Rainbow Dash, however, nodded firmly and pointed a wing to the matriarch, sneering at Rarity.

The Cakes, for their part, just sobbed and leaned against each other, while Pinkie looked on in confusion, scratching her head with a hoof before silently shrugging to the two aghast Princesses.

“Okay, whoa, back up there everypony! Why would a cake make Big Mac mount the Crusaders? I just … what?” The purple Princess finally managed to force the words out, her subconscious being annoyingly unhelpful with mental images and scenarios that, after all she’d seen last night, gave Twilight the willies something fierce.

“Last night, Rainbow dropped off the cake that Rares said she’d have made for us, as thanks fer lookin’ after the Crusaders fer the evenin’.” Applejack explained, still looking green around the gills as she clutched her beloved hat to her chest. “Was a nice gesture, ah thought, but about half an’ hour after we had dee-zert, mah loins were on fire, an’ poor Mac was jus’ about to punch a hole through the dinner-table with Lil’ Mac!”

“My wings were locked straight for seven hours, let alone getting my, uh, field ploughed by Big Mac. I thought I was gonna die!” Rainbow added, wincing as she looked over to her friends for support and saw Fluttershy giving her an agonized look. “It wasn’t intentional, Flutters! We all know that you two are … you know, into each other. But we were in full-blown estrus because of that stupid cake!”

“And you!” The rainbow-maned Pegasus continued, pointing a wing at Rarity as the spluttering Unicorn stared googly-eyed at them. “There’s jokes, there’s pranks, then there’s the manure you pulled! Bad enough you slipped us an aphrodisiac-filled cake, but you did so when you knew the Crusaders would be stopping by for dinner! What in Tartarus were you thinking? Even I wouldn’t put a filly in harm’s way for a prank!”

“This Zebra can confirm, Applejack was in the middle of her heat, which is rather strange because summer is completely beat.” Zecora pointed out, the Zebra shaman shifting gingerly on her cushion. “Even the latest bloomer would have been done moons ago, yet both Fluttershy and I can confirm her flower was in full show.”

Now it was Big Mac’s turn to give a horrified look to somepony, staring at Applejack with an expression somewhere between absolute horror and pure envy, which caused his sister to bury her face in her now-completely mangled hat and whimper, and Fluttershy to hide behind Zecora, peering out at the group from behind the double barricades of the Shaman's flanks and Fluttershy’s own long mane.

“Wow. A Zebra and Fluttershy in one night. Way to go, AJ!” Rainbow muttered, raising a hoof to give Applejack a slap on the back, having apparently forgotten her other fore-limb was now snug in a cast of it's own, and nearly fell onto the ground herself.

“It was supposed to just be sugar! SUGAR!” Rarity wailed, rocking back and forth against the wall in her cast once again, eyes flicking from one pony to the next in disbelief.

“It’s still your fault, Rarity.” Fluttershy pointed out, the cripplingly shy Pegasi boldly standing up to point a hoof at her friend. “If you hadn’t tried to do such a mean-spirited thing to your friend in the first place, we wouldn’t be here right now! Just sugar wouldn’t have done this to us! You need to apologize, right now.”

“I was punched in the face!” Rarity shrieked back. “A lady’s face is her treasure! Such an insult had to be repaid!”

Twilight opened her mouth to speak, then winced, her eyes flashing a dark purple for a second before the Alicorn shook her head and put a hoof to her temples, grimacing as if in pain.

“Twilight?” Luna whispered, leaning in close as the room descended into squabbling again, with Rarity screeching her innocence and how Applejack was to blame for hitting her, and Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Applejack demanding Rarity apologise for their ‘rough night’.

“Something is … wrong …” Twilight whispered back, scrunching up her face in pain as she pulled her hoof down from her temples and looked at Rarity with concern. “I don’t know why, but I just saw the Element of Generosity in my mind, but it was straining against the torc’s setting, trying to do … something …”

“Is this the first time you’ve seen this vision?” Now looking greatly concerned, Luna put a wing across Twilight’s back as the hubbub of the room grew louder and more hostile around them.

“Yes … but what does it mean?” The purple alicorn whimpered. “I start to have visions about Rarity’s Element right as all of this happens, it can’t be a coincidence!”

“Perhaps we can … explain?” Carrot Cake offered, raising a hoof awkwardly into the air as the assembled Mares slowly descended into a painful silence, staring at the two whispering Alicorns in suspicion.

“Please, good stallion, do so before we have another incident on our hooves.” Sighing heavily, the Lunar Monarch pulled back from her marefriend, though her gaze lingered long on Rarity.

“W-well, you see, your Majesties …” stammering, the gangly stallion began. Yesterday, around the second bell of the afternoon, miss Rarity came by our store and placed a very peculiar order. She asked for a triple-layer chocolate cake, glazed cherries, fresh whipped cream, caramel sauce, all the trimmings … with triple the normal sugar content in addition to 'whatever will give the Ponies who eat it enough stamina to stay awake all night' …”

“It’s all my fault!” Cup Cake interrupted, sniffling and shooting an agonized look at the Crusaders.

“No, honey, it’s mine. I took the order, I should have just stuck with stamina potions or tried to mix in the guarana instead.” The gangly stallion protested, wrapping a hoof around his wife’s shoulders and pulling her close. “Your Majesties … no. Everypony, this is all a horrible mistake.”

“Wait, why would you mix aphrodisiacs into the cake?” Twilight spluttered as the room now focused its undivided attention on the two bakers.

“Well, it was my fault, Princess Twilight. You see, we couldn’t understand why anypony would want the Cutiemark Crusders to be up all night long! It just didn’t make sense, but then I remembered that Rarity was always being coy about her love-life when we’d have our monthly get-together at the Ponyville Spa, and I thought that maybe that was the reason.” Cup Cake sighed, closing her eyes and sagging against her husband for a few seconds before continuing. “It just seemed like such a bizarre thing to ask for, to want the Crusaders to be even more energetic and hyper than they normally are!”

Applebloom muttered ‘We’re right here, y’know?’ before earning a swat from her sister’s hat to make her shut up.

“Cup thought it might have been Rarity trying to subtly order a surprise for a lucky Royal Guard, something to help him, ah, perform without needing to offend him by offering stimulants after all the stress that yesterday must have caused, and was saying it was for Apple Acres rather than openly say it was for her own use. Faust knows, it’s not the weirdest thing we’ve been tasked to make, and not just by Rarity.” Carrot added further, wincing as he noticed the laser-guided glare that Rarity was aiming their way.

“I meant for you to add sugar! Not aphrodisiacs, just plain sugar! Why am I being blamed for somepony else’s stupidity! I am the aggrieved party here, I have been brutally attacked by my so-called ‘friends’ twice now!” Rarity spluttered, and Twilight winced again, the flare of dark purple energy flashing in her eyes as her friends continued to fight. “First Applejack punches me in the face, leaving a terribly unsightly bruise on my poor jaw and knocks me unconscious, and now Rainbow Dash almost kills me for somepony else’s ridiculous ‘interpretation’ of my order!”

“So you admit you were trying to prank us! Damn it, Rarity!” Rainbow exploded, taking a hobbling half-step towards the immobilized Unicorn before Applejack jerked her back down into a sitting position.

“You should apologize, Rarity!” Granny Smith and Fluttershy shouted at once.

“I’m sorry, Rarity, I thought I was …” Cup Cake began before Rarity cut her off viciously.

“You thought I would settle for some … Guardspony? Me? I have greater ambitions in life than being a soldier’s wife!” Rarity spat, glaring at the pair of bakers with naked hostility in her eyes.

“Hey! My brother is a Guardspony!” Twilight snorted, wings rustling as she gave Rarity a dirty look in turn. “As a matter of fact, a couple of Applejack’s and Pinkie Pie’s cousins are Guardsponies too!”

“Same here! What, somepony who works for a living isn’t good enough, Rarity?” Rainbow Dash chipped in, scowling at the immobilized fashionista, who glared back at her with contempt.

“I have no intention of settling for normal, only one of the elite will possibl-lugh?!”

“Mister Cake, are you certain of this? I don’t need to remind anypony that giving drugs to underage Ponies is a serious offence. Even accidentally, everypony involved in the creation of this drugged cake could be facing fines, or even time in Horseshoe Bay at worst. The fate of three Ponies is at stake here.” Luna spoke up, wrapping dusky-blue magic around the muzzles of the majority of the Element Bearers before they could interrupt again, or fan the argument into an even worse encounter.

“Wait, three? You mean Rarity too?’ Twilight asked, turning her entire head and neck to give Luna a surprised look. “I mean, this is all an accident, and a horrific one at that, but she didn’t ask for the aphrodisiacs.”

“IF this goes to the Courts, and I do stress the word ‘if’, then her ambiguous wording and dubious intent for the cake in question could be used against her. While the lion’s share of the crime …” Luna sighed as the Cakes winced and dropped their heads to the ground in defeat. “… would fall upon the heads of the Ponies who made the drugged cake, Rarity was the individual who ordered the creation of it in the first place. The intent behind the order would also have to be considered, especially given that the Cutiemark Crusaders are officially on a watch-list with the Royal Guard for their antics, and Rarity is related to one of the victims of her prank.”

“There is also the point to consider that there are precedents for similar crimes. Most recently there was the case of Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns vs Sherbert Lips, a dreadful event in which a teacher who, in response to being the victim of continuous and humiliating pranks from her noble-born students, acquired some unidentified contraband that had been taken off several students and told one of the cooks to add it to the evening meal, claiming it was exotic curry spices, in the hopes it would humiliate or even harm the students whom she had been unable to get expelled or even apologise for their actions towards her.” Luna continued. “While the order was in reverse compared to the debacle before us, the cook was also charged, albeit for simply adding unidentified magical reagents to the food, for the love-poisoning of over eighty-seven Ponies and the actions they took while under the effect of the powdered Heart’s Desire. While Lady Rarity might simply escape with a fine, considering her many actions in service to Equestria and her role in this matter, she would most certainly still be charged with the crimes.”

“And if I recall correctly, one cannot be elevated to the peerage if convicted of a crime of the first degree, which includes murder, treason or … or rape.” Twilight muttered as the room went silent again. “And the law is very strict on that matter, to protect Ponies from predatory individuals and to ensure such Ponies are never able to achieve political power within our nation, given that our species is infamous for our lack of inhibitions when caught in the full grip of our mating instincts. Under the law, anypony proved guilty of being a party to a rape, including the unwanted use of sexual stimulants intended to raise the libido or otherwise bring about a similar state of estrus, or being knowingly involved in the providing of said substances to an unwilling party, can also be charged with rape even if they didn’t physically touch the victim.”

“Thankfully, nopony here was aware that they were providing sexual stimulants to minors or unwilling parties, but the fact remains that the Cakes, and to a lesser extent, Lady Rarity are still responsible for creating a dish which was loaded with sexual stimulants which was then given to unaware Ponies, an act that is considered as a crime under Equestrian Law.” Luna pointed out. “Luckily for everypony, as one of the two Princesses who rule this country, I am able to pass sentence on my own and avoid a public outing of this debacle for the Ponies involved… if all parties are willing? Otherwise, we must take this to the Courts, especially since now two of the highest authorities in the land, Twilight Sparkle and myself, are now aware of the situation and the Ponies involved.”

“That is so flimsy …” The immobilized Fashionista muttered weakly as the other Ponies in the room nodded or said yes. “I just ordered the cake, with extra sugar …”

“Your wording was ambiguous and your intent malicious. I will say it again, you might avoid actual time in a cell, Lady Rarity, but you would be fined and charged for your part in all of this, and that would sink any hope you may still have for joining the Nobility as one of their own. Regardless of your intentions, you are the genesis of this mess and as such, under the law, you are considered a party to the crime at the very least.” The Lunar Monarch pointed out calmly, though her eyes narrowed as Twilight whimpered and put a hoof to her temple as if in pain. “So, are we all in agreement to resolve this matter discreetly, or shall we drag this out to the bitter end in the Courts?”

“Ah can’t rightly say ah’d like to be in the papers fer somethin’ like this.” Applejack muttered darkly, shooting a foul look at Rarity that the white Unicorn matched with equal venom. “Ah’ll agree, Princess Luna, if’n only fer the sake o’ mah friends an’ the Crusaders.”

“We agree. We will abide by anything you say.” Carrot Cake added, his wife nodding as she dabbed at her eyes with a now-dripping hankerchief.

Within moments, almost all of the assembled Ponies had given their assent, with Rarity being the final one, her tone bitter as she agreed to be bound by Luna’s ruling.

“Since we shall be resolving this matter privately, even if I must still lodge the incident with the Hall of Records, I believe that Blood Price will serve as both suitable punishment for the Cakes and Lady Rarity, and fair compensation for the affected parties.” The Lunar Princess waited until the shocked whispers of the rest of the Ponies finally died off. “Despite the name, the law does not allow one to draw blood from the offending party, merely a loss of funds, goods or property to the victims. I will ask those who have fallen afoul of the ‘cake’ incident to list their desired recompense, and then the guilty parties shall either agree or offer a counter-proposal. If neither party can agree on a suitable form of recompense, I shall intervene and impose a suitable form of compensation that will give both parties at least some closure.”

For almost a minute, Applejack, Zecora, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Big Mac whispered to each other, shooting looks ranging from angry glares to ones of misery to the Cakes and Rarity before Applejack stood up and nodded firmly to the Princesses.

“First, the victims shall put forth their claims, individually I might add, and then the offenders shall either accept those claims, or offer a counter-proposal. I will, however, point out that the Cakes and Lady Rarity never intended for this to happen, and the Cakes, at least, are fully aware of the nature of their transgression and are also parents themselves of young Foals.” Luna continued, raising a hoof to forestall Rainbow’s demands as the brash Pegasus opened her mouth to speak. “I will also point out that Lady Rarity has been gravely injured and will likely be unable to work for nearly a month before her injuries heal, if not longer, and thus will already be suffering under financial strain. Anypony who does not take these facts into consideration will be reprimanded.”

“Now, who will go first?”

Chapter 50

CHAPTER 50

The air in Twilight’s bedroom felt heavy with stress and anticipation as the ‘victims’ of Rarity’s prank and the Cake’s mistake looked at one another, all of them suddenly gripped with nervousness as they weighed up who would, or should, speak first, before finally Applejack sighed heavily and made her move.

“Well, your Majesty, if’n ah can go first?” Applejack asked, raising a hoof and waiting for several moments before Luna nodded. “Ah’m right plum pissed at ‘em all, but it’s obvious the Cakes meant no harm, an’ Rarity is bein’ … well, a right bitch, but ah can understan’ her getting’ her back up with everypony after her, ‘specially after taking a hoof to the guts like she did this mornin’. If’n the Cakes won’t mind usin’ some of our apples the next time they enter a competition, an’ make sure everypony knows it came from our family farm, ah’m willing to call it a day. An’ ah’ll jus’ have Rarity make me a couple of sets of nice, simple clothes for when ah start hirin’ some more farmhooves ‘round Apple Acres.”

“That’s all?” The Lunar Princess asked softly, raising an eyebrow at the farm-mare incredulously. “I admit, I had asked you all to take their situations into consideration, but after what they did to you ...”

“Ah ain’t gonna beggar ‘em, if that’s what you’re asking, Princess Luna. The Cakes might have done wrong, but they didn’t do wrong on purpose an’ it’s plain as the freckles on mah face that they’re as torn up ‘bout it as ah am. Besides, Pinkie’s got the right of it, the Cakes are good Ponies with a pair of the sweetest lil’ Foals y’all ever did see, it’d be wrong to push for more when they’re obviously tryin’ to make things right.”

“An’ Rarity’s a friend, even if she is bein’ a miss snooty frou-frou right now. Ain’t gonna throw that away ‘cause of some stupid prank gone wrong. If’n that were the case, ah’d have bucked Pinkie an’ Rainbow clear of mah family’s lands years back...” The farm-mare finished with a wry smile and a small round of chuckles from the room.

“Very well. Twilight? I’m sorry, but …” Luna began, turning her head to look at Twilight and spotting her marefriend already scribbling down Applejack’s ‘claim’ on a sheet of paper.

“Already on it. Can’t believe we’re actually having to do this, but I’m recording everything for the Hall of Records, and for a friendship letter to Princess Celestia when this is all said and done.”

“Excellent. Next … Fluttershy?”

“I … oh, uhm.” The butter-colored Mare stammered before earning an impatient swat from Zecora. “Oh bother. I wouldn’t object if the Cakes could maybe give me some of their baked goods that might be on the verge of expiring for a few weeks? We’ve had an influx of critters from the Everfree Forest over the past few weeks who lost their homes to the Hydra and her spawn, and they are eating a lot of my food-stores ...”

“And Rarity’s ‘blood price’?” Twilight prodded her friend verbally as the shy Pegasus tried to shrink behind Zecora again.

“S-s-s-she has to look after the Cutiemark Crusaders over the weekends twice a month for a year… once she’s better and caught up on work. And she has to apologize to everypony she was trying to prank.”

“And once again I am in awe of the good hearts of the Ponies of Ponyville.” Luna said aloud, earning a bashful smile from Fluttershy before the Pegasus finally managed to shrink back behind her Zebra friend. “Next, I would suggest Rainbow Dash … preferably before she bursts.”

“I want the Cakes to stand in-line for me every day the next time Cider Season comes around.” The rainbow-maned Pegasus snapped seconds after Luna had finished speaking. “I am going to get a mug of cider this time that doesn’t come from the bottom of a barrel or that I had to beg or borrow from somepony else. And Rarity has to agree that she is never going to try to trick me into going to the Ponyville Spa-Center, or to harp on about me about the state of my hooves!”

“That’s a … a little unfair, considering the Cakes have to look after their twins …” Twilight began, before the Cakes began to shake their heads vigorously. “Well, still, when that happens, hopefully somepony can babysit for a few hours … maybe I could try looking after them again?”

“Princess Twilight, we’re very grateful for the offer, but the last time you tried to look after our children, Pumpkin and Pound ended up glowing fluorescent green from nose to tail and spoke in draconic for a week. Please understand that we were very grateful for the effort, but you are never looking after our Foals ever again.” Cup Cake pointed out with a mournful expression as Carrot continued to shake his head.

“I’m never going to live that down … okay, Rainbow’s request is recorded, who is next?” Twilight muttered sourly as she jotted down the request.

“This one would like a say, if she please, if she may?” Zecora spoke up next. “My ass still stings and my legs move like I’ve had a stroke, but these Ponies are remorseful and it would be cruel to send them broke. Connections they must have, as successful business ponies, perhaps they could find helpers to rebuild my house so homely?”

“Help find … reliable work-crews to rebuild your house. Got it.” The purple princess scribbled down the note, ignoring Luna’s eye-rolling.

“I would have recorded it word for word, Twilight. My sister has always loved the way Zebra Shamans speak. Still, once again I must say I am greatly surprised at you all. Most Ponies from Canterlot would be asking for the sun and moon, figuratively speaking, in these situations. It speaks volumes for the characters of all parties involved ...” Pointing a hoof at Big Mac next, Luna gestured for the large Stallion to say his piece.

“Ain’t got much words to say, but I’m mad as heck at the three of you.” Big Mac rumbled, glaring at the Cakes, and then Rarity before seeing them cringe apparently made the Stallion reconsider. “Ain’t much more I could add, given what my sister and her friends have said, but I’ll settle for some nice and simple clothes from Rarity when she’s able to work again, and maybe some free food from the Cakes the next time my sisters and I have to work at our stall at the Ponyville Markets.”

“Clothing and a suit of well-made, simple clothing. Lunch delivered to your stall for … six months?” Scribbling franticly, Twilight looked up and offered a firm end to the ‘blood price’, and both the Cakes and Big Mac nodded in assent. “Well, that seems relatively fair to both parties? Who is next, Luna?”

“I would say the Crusaders. Although under normal circumstances I would have the parents or guardians of the underage Ponies speak, given the unusual situation at our hooves and the fact that the legal guardians of the Crusaders are all present, or are unavailable right now, it would be best if the Crusaders speak for themselves.” Luna’s hoof now extended to the Crusaders, who brought their heads together and began whispering fiercely for a long while before separating, and Sweetie Belle sat up to speak.

“Thank you, Princess Luna. We want … milkshakes, one free milkshake for each of us, every week, from the Cakes! And we want Rarity to apologise to everypony, and she has to let us use our pick of her supplies to make the Cutiemark Crusader Clubhouse look better!” The young Unicorn said firmly, smiling as her fellow Crusaders clapped appreciatively.

“Uhm … milkshakes for a lifetime might be a little steep, don’t you think?” Twilight ventured tentatively. “And girls, while I hate to point this out, Rarity has to pay for all those materials, she can’t just give them away …”

“Maybe it would be best if you get your free drinks for three months, and Rarity has to provide basic amenities for your clubhouse, such as pillows or curtains, something like that? Good quality furnishings, not just hand-me-down things like what you have now?” Fluttershy added, peeking over Zecora’s flank.

“Oh. Yeah, that’s probably better. We’d probably end up breaking any real furniture we got.” Scootaloo muttered, earning a punch in the shoulder from Sweetie Belle and a long-suffering groan from Apple Bloom.

“Well, you are all still living with your families, so I suppose you don’t quite understand how hard it can be to make ends meet at your age.” Luna said loudly, raising an eyebrow as Sweetie Belle opened a mouth to protest. “Blood Price is meant to incur loss enough to make the offenders know they have committed an offence great enough to be punished and to sting enough that they will not repeat their actions, not to bleed them dry. Do not push me on this, children.”

“I promise you girls, you’re all getting super-sized Pinkie-style milkshakes, whatever toppings you want.” Mr Cake blurted, closing his eyes and squeezing his wife’s shoulder as the smaller, portly Mare’s voice failed her. “We … we can’t apologize nearly enough for what happened to you three. Bad enough everypony else got … but you … you’re so young and … and I just can’t imagine …”

Apparently mollified at the prospect of three months of free milkshakes almost as big as they were, Sweetie Belle grinned, along with her friends, and sat down quickly, while Luna looked to the ceiling and mouthed ‘mother earth, preserve me from the foals’ before speaking again.

“Very well, we’ve all heard the victim’s claims. First, the Cakes: Do you have any counter-proposals to offer before We make our ruling?”

“None, your Majesty. And we’d like to thank everypony for being so kind. We know we messed up, and we’ll do everything we can to make this up to everypony.” Carrot Cake said hoarsely, bowing his head and sagging against his wife.

“Thank you, everypony, thank you so mu-hu-hu-huuuuch …” Cup Cake began before bursting into tears and putting her face into her hooves. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry …”

Hesitantly, Applejack stood up and tottered over to the sobbing Mare, gently giving her a hug before being grabbed in turn by the distraught Cup Cake, who was in-turn hugged by Fluttershy, the three Mares holding onto each other tightly, although Twilight suspected it might have had more to do with how strained the muscles in Applejack’s and Fluttershy’s legs might be after their ‘romp’ than Cup Cake trying to apologize for her awful mistake.

“And Lady Rarity?” Luna asked loudly over the sniffling and whispered comments of ‘it’s alright’ and ‘please let go’ from the trio of Mares.

“I don’t really have much of a choice, do I?” The nearly-mummified Unicorn snorted bitterly, her posture, with all four legs sticking out like a child’s doll in their plaster prison, almost comical against the frustration on her features. “Very well, I acquiesce to this ‘Blood Price’ farce, even if it is not my fault.”

The room went dead silent as everypony in the room focused on Rarity, some frowning, some closing their eyes and sighing, and Twilight and Luna simultaneously face-hoofing.

“Lady Rarity, you just agreed, meaning you are bound to the terms the victims have given, thus you have to apologize.” The Lunar Monarch said in a very calm and very even tone after several deep, calming breaths. “Otherwise, this has all been for naught, and I will have to decide the terms of your ‘blood price’ myself …”

“Nopony is asking for you to apologise for the Cake’s part in this mess … sorry, mister and missus Cake …” Twilight began, wincing and bobbing her head to the bakers, who merely shook their heads and gave her wan smiles. “… But you do have to apologise for your attempt to super-charge the Crusaders with sugar so that the Apple family would have to deal with all three young Mares being hyperactive all night long. That’s all that’s being asked of you.”

Rarity huffed in her cast, glaring at Twilight before scoffing and turning her face away as much as her cast would allow, missing the wince as Twilight’s eyes flashed dark purple again and the newest Alicorn sagged in pain, a dull whimper of pain escaping her this time.

“I can’t believe you!” In a surprisingly display of temper, Fluttershy pushed herself free of Cup Cake’s iron-grip hug and stormed over to Rarity, pulling Rarity’s head around to face her and butting heads with the startled Unicorn, glaring, no, Staring right into Rarity’s eyes. “Applejack saved your life, and you repaid her with a prank?”

“B-but my face, she hit my face …” Rarity whimpered, unable to look away, unable to escape as Fluttershy’s eyes bored into her own, dredging up feelings of guilt …. “My face, Fluttershy! After all I’ve done to cultivate my image, to lay the foundations for my joining the elite of Canterlot …”

“Yah plum-done dog-gone idiot! Princess Celestia was pullin’ down enough magic t’make Twilight’s home start to turn see-through, an’ yah were gonna quibble an’ whine with Twilight ‘bout goin’ outside ‘cause yer mane was a lil’ mussy?” Applejack spoke up now, face going first slack in surprise, then into a tense mask of anger. “An’ after Princess Celestia herself told y’all that trappin’ us all in that light-pillar-thingy o’ hers was somethin’ she was willin’ to do, an’ not half as bad as what she’d done to her own dang sister, yah tried to prank my family an’ the Crusaders fer saving yer plot? Uh, beggin’ yer pardon, Princess Luna.”

“I take no offence, Applejack, although I am both alarmed and very, very angry to hear that Lady Rarity, a Unicorn no less, could not sense the overwhelming amount of magic being unleashed and still not realize the danger you were all in at the time.” Luna replied to the farm-mare, her teal-coloured eyes now boring holes in Rarity’s face … or what little of it was visible beneath the now-enraged Fluttershy’s own face. “I would have thought, of all of Element Bearers, as a Pony whose work is entirely dependent upon the finesse of her magical gifts that Lady Rarity would be easily able sense the threat and react appropriately.”

“Pr-princess Celestia would never hurt her subjects …” The words came meekly from the immobilized Unicorn, as much from the emotional pressure Fluttershy was applying as the lack of space she had to use her mouth with how closely the butter-coloured Pegasus was pressing their faces together.

“Not intentionally, but my sister does have an entire nation to protect.” Luna pointed out as Applejack finally took pity on Rarity and dragged Fluttershy back several inches, a task that, strangely enough, left both Fluttershy and Applejack blushing furiously. “If trapping two of the Element Bearers and two of her fellow Princesses in a Stasis Field for several days would have prevented another Lust War with the Succuponies, then Celestia would do so. She would blame herself for our distress, but the position of Princess often means putting one’s own feelings aside in favour of the greater good.”

“Look, before we go off-topic again … Rarity, apologise to everypony, please, before Fluttershy has to use the Stare on you again. Then the Cakes can go home and the rest of you have to stay here for a few minutes more, at least, while we sort out some … interesting hurdles that yesterday put in-front of us.” Twilight chipped in, rubbing at her temples as if suffering a headache. “Then we can put all of this behind us, move on and never mention it ever again.”

“I … apologise …”

Twilight and Luna sighed in relief. Perhaps the morning could be salvaged after all …

“… Even if it is not my fault.”

Twilight groaned loudly and slammed her muzzle into the mattress, muffling her cursing into indecipherable outrage through the innocent linens, while Luna settled for another face-hoof and set of deep, calming breathing exercises.

“Apology … accepted, ah guess. Best we’re gonna get from Rares till she pulls her horn outta her plot.” Applejack muttered sourly, before a single, solitary cushion flew through the air in a slow, majestic arc and pomf’d onto Rarity’s face, impaling itself on her horn.

The entire room turned as one, barring Rarity who couldn’t see at all with her face once-more covered by a foreign object, to see a scowling Sweetie Belle trying to pull another cushion out from beneath her fellow Crusaders to fling that one too.

“I’m not accepting that! This is the sisterhooves social all over again! Rarity thinks she can’t do wrong, but we wouldn’t even be here if she hadn’t ordered that cake in the first place!” Sweetie Belle got to her hooves and yank the cushion out from under Scootaloo and threw it at her sister, landing it atop the other cushion before the young Unicorn fled the room, sobbing at the top of her lungs. “I’m not coming home until Rarity apologises!”

Taking off after their friend, the other two Crusaders rushed out, leaving the adults blinking in surprise, with Rarity levitating the two cushions off her horn and face with a look of shock on her face.

“Well … that was a thing.” Rainbow Dash muttered as the Ponies in the room shifted awkwardly, all gazes turning to the floundering Rarity. “Then again, Sweetie brings up a point. This isn’t the first time Rarity’s burnt us …”

“I beg your pardon?” The fashionista spluttered.

“Yes, now that you mention it, Rarity did blow us off when she went to Canterlot.” Fluttershy pointed out, a rare frown marring the butter-coloured Pegasus’s features as she stared, a thankfully normal stare, at her immobilized friend. “She spent all her time hanging off Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee and his entourage, and lied about Opal getting sick, even to the point she dumped water over the poor dear to cover up when we arrived.”

“H-how did you …?”

“Rarity … I can talk to animals. And Opal was with you the entire time.” Fluttershy sighed and looked away from her friend, closing her eyes as she spoke. “I heard every little detail about what you got up to when you went to Canterlot.”

“… I will not apologise for trying to make my business more successful. I will … apologise … for my part in this debacle …” It took an obvious effort of will for Rarity to not add that it wasn’t her fault again to the end of that, and it took her several more seconds to swallow the words and continue speaking as the rest of the room either glared at her or waited for her next move. “But I will not apologise for chasing my dream. I will join the elite of our society, and I will not apologise for pursuing that goal, even if it does not meet the approval of my friends.”

“Even if it meant all of us getting’ stuck in Princess Celestia’s magical sunbeam trap?” Applejack asked, raising an eyebrow, to which Rarity sniffed dismissively, neither Pony paying attention as Twilight’s eyes flashed with dark purple light again, the Alicorn all but going limp on her bed and whimpering in pain, nor Luna’s startled hiss as she wrapped a wing around Twilight and tried to pull her marefriend up into a sitting position again.

“I have spent years cultivating an image of class and culture, Applejack, something you have proven time and time again you do not understand nor appreciate. I do not intend to spend the rest of my days in Ponyville, labouring over clothing for the masses who do not understand the love I put into my work! Countless days spent slaving over designs, weeks or months where I went out into the wilderness hunting gems and dealing with unscrupulous merchants and arrogant nobles, just so that I may finally find a place where my art, my masterpieces, can be truly appreciated for what they are, the circle of Nobility that serves and advises the Princess herself.” Rarity spat back, glaring at the farm-pony as she did so. “To enter into those refined ranks, I must prove I am noble in bearing and intent, if not birth. I intend to marry into their ranks as soon as I can find a Stallion of suitable rank and amicable nature, and that means I must dazzle the Nobility beyond anything a landed or titled Mare of their own ranks can. I will not be held back or made to feel guilty for pursuing my dream by Ponies content to live in a two-bit town and spend every day working their hooves to the bone for a pittance!”

“I will not apologise for wanting to better myself and my lot in life, and if how I do so makes me a bad Pony in your eyes, then know I return those feelings in full measure!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight gasped in pain, her muzzle almost touching the floor as she suffered another surge of pain, the magic of the Element of Generosity flooding her senses as the vision appeared before her mind’s eye again, the dark purple gem at the heart of Rarity’s torc straining against the setting that held it in place before the golden metal holding it in place squealed, and the gem flung itself free of the setting … and vanished.

What she had hoped would be the end of this morning’s particular brand of disaster was now instead the heart of what seemed to be the genesis of a bitter feud as her friends screeched insults at each other while the Cakes cowered between them, and Luna used her magic liberally to keep the other Element Bearers separate from each other.

Mercifully, no visions of the other Elements inflicted themselves on her, although a part of her mind wondered how Rainbow Dash inflicting a Sonic Rainboom-propelled punch to Rarity’s everything could be counted as ‘loyal’, and a sudden surge of alien knowledge poured into her brain.

It was … illuminating, to say the least. Knowledge poured into her, facts and traits of the Elements she hadn’t even thought to research or ask questions about were made uncomfortably clear to Twilight to the point of physical pain as her mind struggled to absorb the knowledge being forced into it, and the presence of Magic, the actual Element of Magic itself, became clearly noticeable to her, a spiritual weight she hadn’t even known she was carrying since the day they had all banished the Nightmare Spirit from Luna and purified her of her Nightmare Moon persona …

“… Think I care? I have given endlessly to everypony in this room, my time, my clothing, my ... oh my word!” Twilight finally found the strength to focus on the conversation as Rarity began yelling over the top of the other Element Bearers, until Twilight’s horn flashed and the room was bathed in her magic for several seconds, startling all in the room into silence and drawing their eyes to the newest Alicorn.

“You’re a grown mare, Rarity, you can do what you want with your life. But when you put somepony else’s life on the line, that is where we have a problem. I’ll ask Nurse Redheart to return you to your home, and I’ll retrieve the Elements of Harmony.” The purple Alicorn sighed and let her horn flicker with magic a second time, the beginnings of a spell swirling around the twisting spire on her forehead, the purple aura sparkling as powerful magic was invoked.

“Oh, don’t trust me with the Elements anymore? Perhaps you’ll leave them with the Cakes next? Or maybe Discord this time?” Rarity snapped back, grimacing at her friend.

“I trust you with them, Rarity. I have always trusted you ... but right now you’re in no position to protect them. And most importantly, Generosity doesn’t belong to you anymore.” The Alicorn sighed, bowing her head as the spluttering fashionista filled the air with half-coherent noise, the glow around Twilight’s horn brightened and the flashed before a rush of displaced air ruffled the manes and tails of the Ponies in the room, and the Elements of Harmony flashed into existence, settling onto their Bearers with a flash of rainbow-hued light.

All five of Elements.

“Twilight, is that …” Luna whispered as Twilight levitated her crown off of her head, where the six-pointed star of Friendship now had a neighbour, the purple kite-shaped stone that had once been the centrepiece of the Torc of Generosity, now much smaller and set directly below the six-pointed star, the new gem set amongst the swirling golden wires that supported the larger, six-pointed gem above the crown.

“Oh mah stars …”

“Did Rarity just get das boot?”

“I think not well will this go! Thank goodness restrained is that …”

“Wait, we can lose our Elements?”

Rarity, for her part, was stunned into merciful silence, her eyes bulging as her pupils shrank to pin-pricks, rapidly flicking from the remaining torcs to Twilight’s crown and back again.

“I am sorry, Rarity. Ever since you started trying to avoid your part in this disaster, I felt the Elements call out to me, and the connection between you and Generosity fray a little bit more every time.” Twilight explained, an expression of fatigue clearly visible on her face as she placed the newly-augmented crown back on her head. “I don’t fully understand why, but Generosity is refusing to allow you to wield it until you find Harmony within yourself again. I’m sorry … I’m sorry I couldn’t stop this from happening.”

“Nor should you have even thought to try, Twilight. The Elements are fragments of even greater powers, and if you had tried to intercede, you may have been punished severely for reaching above your station.” Luna stood up and walked over to Twilight, wrapping a large dusky-blue wing around the young Alicorn and squeezing her gently. “I would also strongly recommend all of us keep a close eye on Lady Rarity over the coming days. Speaking from experience, being rejected by the Elements can be a traumatic experience, and I will be monitoring her dreams carefully over the next few weeks.”

“Are not even my dreams sacrosanct? Bad enough there are Royal Agents spying on us all, but first my so-called friends assault me and lay false blame at my hooves, then Twilight betrays me and strips me of my duties as a Bearer, but now you deny me even the privacy of my own thoughts?” Rarity shrieked, rocking furiously in her cast, trying to inch closer to Twilight, her horn flaring and spluttering as her temper got the better of whatever spell she was trying to cast.

“When I lost my connection to the Elements because my jealousy and anger got the better of me, I went insane. I lost my balance, my connection to Harmony, to the point where a Nightmare Spirit was able to completely possess me and take control of my physical form, and even usurp control over my Aspect. No doubt the Element will rekindle its connection with you when you once again embody the true nature it represents once more.” The dusky blue Alicorn replied, her tone angry and her face a stony mask as the Lunar Princess used her own magic to firmly put Rarity back on her pillow. “You do not bear all the fault for what has transpired, Lady Rarity, but consider that a fragment of the forces of Creation itself find your actions and attitude intolerable. Think on that very carefully before you fling accusations of betrayal in the faces of those who call you friend.”

“Okay everypony, ah get this is a big development, but somepony needs to get Rarity home a’fore she says or does something she’ll really regret.” Applejack sighed and threw her hat over Rarity’s face as the Unicorn opened her mouth to either shout a protest or curse at the Princess. “Ain’t nopony going to change their minds right now, an’ the Element’s already spoken, so there ain’t no point in draggin’ this out any longer.”

“I … we’ll get her.” Carrot Cake said, flicking his eyes nervously from the immobilized, muffled Unicorn in the corner to the newly-augmented crown on Twilight’s head before the gangly baker and his wife all but bolted for the door.

“This is … you cannot … my destiny ...!” Rarity spluttered furiously, levitating Applejack’s hat off her face and telekinetically flinging it across the room. “This will not stand! I will write to Princess Celestia, to the Council of Nobles, to the papers! Right-minded Ponies will take my side, and you will …”

Luna’s horn glowed, and a matching glow surrounded Rarity for several seconds as the Unicorn ranted, her words slowing and slurring before she finally relaxed and began to loudly snore.

“Well … it appears that Lady Rarity will require more than just a nurse’s tender care.” The Lunar Princess muttered in the now-quiet room as Fluttershy crept over to Rarity’s side and placed a hoof against the Unicorn’s neck, checking Rarity’s vitals. “I will require Spike to send a letter to my sister to have a flock of my Night Guard reassigned to oversee her needs until such time as Rarity is whole and hale again ... and can be made to see reason. The last thing Equestria needs is to have a scandal surrounding the Element Bearers, or a disgruntled ex-Bearer for that matter. Our country is divided enough as it stands, and having an Element Bearer, one of our greatest national treasures, stained by such crimes and scandal will only cause our allies to think even less of Equestria as a whole.”

“Were … were you serious? That you went off your nut when you lost the Elements? And we can lose our Elements?” Rainbow Dash asked softly, brushing a feathery wing over the gleaming golden torc around her neck with an expression of doubt and alarm on her face.

“It’s news to me too, Rainbow.” Twilight replied in an equally soft voice, levitating the crown off her head and staring at the two gems now glittering back at her.

“It takes an extreme event to disrupt the bond between Bearer and Element, such as when Celestia forced the Elements to obey only herself to banish my corrupted self from Equis … or a long, slow build-up of disharmony, such as what happened to myself when I began to believe only one Princess could rule our nation. Perhaps once Lady Rarity calms down enough to see how much a foal she is being, I shall send her to the Royal Mind-He … Psychiatrist. Faust knows, she has helped my sister and I greatly over the past few years with dealing with each other and our history together and my adapting to the changes to my country over the past thousand years, perhaps …” Luna tapped a hoof to her lips as she spoke, her eyes trailing over the Element Bearers before a sad smile played over her face. “Perhaps all of us could stand to visit Happy Place? Surely all of you bear some burdens you have kept to yourselves, stresses and complaints you have swallowed rather than harm those around you?”

“You’re saying we need therapy?” Fluttershy asked as the Element Bearers, Big Mac and Granny Smith all gave each other awkward looks, and Twilight sighed and put her crown on the floor, scooting it under her bed with a hoof to become acquainted with the dust-bunnies.

“It cannot hurt, especially after today’s debacle. The fact that my sister has not offered any of you access to Happy Place’s services strikes me as a measure of trust in all of your natures, but still, perhaps it is a service that should have been offered sooner.”

“For now, I vote we put the offer on the table and get back to it when we’re all … less stressed.” Raising a hoof into the air, Twilight gave a tired smile as the rest of her Friends, those she had left, raised their hoofs in response and nodded. “Faust knows I’ve spent enough time with Happy Place trying to cure my … issues over the years to give her a glowing endorsement, but getting to see her can be difficult, especially if we’re trying to get an appointment without drawing attention to ourselves.”

“Next, I have some rather … interesting news about the Ponies downstairs.” The purple Princess explained, before Nurse Redheart brusquely entered the room, stalking across the room to sling the immobilized and comatose Rarity across her back and give the two Princesses a dirty look. “N-nurse Redheart?”

“I don’t know what happened up here, but given the Cakes came down looking paler than hospital sheets and you all look like somebody kicked your pet dog, I don’t really care to know.” The bluntly-spoken Mare said, raising a thick eyebrow at the Princesses as if daring them to argue. “All I care to ask is how did you sedate Rarity, how long will she be out for, and how dangerous are repeat applications, since the longer she sleeps, the less she could aggravate her injuries.”

“Ain’t she stuck in that cast?’ Granny Smith pointed out, glaring at the slumbering Unicorn, still obviously offended by the spat between her grand-children and the seamstress.

“Physically, yes, but Rarity is a Unicorn, and Unicorns can do magic, meaning even being immobilized is no guarantee that she won’t end up in dire straits again.” The white-coated Earth Pony turned and gave Rainbow Dash a filthy look in turn, somehow managing to look intimidating despite the splay-legged, drooling, comatose Unicorn slung over her back. “And you. The next time I hear about you injuring another Pony, regardless of what happened, I will report you to the authorities faster than you can perform a Sonic Rainboom, am I clear?”

“Like a Crystal Pony’s mane.” The blue Pegasus replied, smirking until she realized that the nurse was being deadly serious. “But she …”

“Rainbow, I am a trained, professional nurse. I needed only to see everypony walking around to realize that nearly everypony in this room had either a very good, or very bad, time last night. Including three underage Ponies whom, despite the many ulcers they’ve given me over the years, are quite dear to me, if not the entire town.”

The silence in the room was deafening.

“So yes, I can connect the dots about why somepony like you would attack a close friend like Rarity, and why the rest of the posse was treating her like a pariah. Since the Princesses are involved, I’m going to assume the matter is being handled in a responsible manner, but if need be, I can provide medical treatment for … unwanted results, or counselling if required. And I want that information on how you sedated Rarity on my desk before day's end, or I will be back and asking questions ...”

And so saying, the Nurse turned around and left the room as swiftly as she had entered, taking great pains to avoid banging Rarity’s limbs on the doorway as she exited the room.

For close to a minute, the room remained silent, Ponies opening their mouths to speak before thinking better of it, nopony able to think of the words to break the uncomfortable atmosphere before Spike entered the room, looking very nervous himself.

“So, uh … Twilight? Luna? Are you going to introduce everypony to the Agents, or do I tell them to come back tomorrow?”

“We’ll be down in a minute … and tell Mister Rich he might have one fewer Pony to guard than we thought.” Twilight said sadly, a sudden thought chilling her mind as she stared at her beloved younger brother and assistant.

How on Equis was she going to break the news of what just happened to Spike?

Chapter 51

CHAPTER 51

“Seriously?” Cadence fumed, reading the telegraph and scowling angrily as she noticed how firmly Celestia had worded things.

Due to the nature of your previous encounters with the refugees of Hive Chrystalis, it has been decided that for the safety of all parties involved, neither Princess Cadence nor any individuals from the Crystal Empire shall be allowed to be alone with any members of Hive Chrysalis. Translation: Cadence and her Guards were not to be left alone with the Changelings, for the Changelings’ protection.

Given the serious nature of the Trial to decide if Equestria shall accept the Changelings into the nation as a race granted full rights and responsibilities, Crown Princess Cadence of the Crystal Empire is forbidden from using, either directly or in round-about methods, the public media of Equestria to negatively influence the course of the Trial or prevent Queen Chrysalis from staying in Equestria long enough to allow the Crown to understand the nature of the threat of the Elder Queens. Translation: She was not to say or do anything to intentionally disrupt the Changeling trials as the Changeling Queen had come babbling about a threat to them all from her elder siblings and would not reveal that information unless her life and those of her surviving brood was guaranteed. And just to twist the knife, Cadence was not to speak to the public, the media or the Nobility about the Changelings in her position as the Princess of Love or the Monarch of the Crystal Empire or to otherwise attempt to ‘negatively’ affect the public’s impression of the Trial.

And finally, Cadence was not to attempt to order Shining Armor or any of the Crystal Empire Guards to perform actions that would violate the spirit or wording of the terms that her dear aunt had so bluntly laid out. Failure to comply would no doubt see her dear aunt send Cadence packing to the Crystal Empire and her role in the up-coming trial would be revoked and any hope of seeing the bug-queen pay for her crimes in person would go up in smoke.

The ‘joy’ of diplomacy at work, since Cadence was now the monarch of a different nation rather than the ‘spare’ Princess the other Nobles had always mocked her for being, meant that Princess Celestia could eject Cadence as soon as the pink Alicorn did something that could be construed as detrimental to or hostile towards Equestria … or any individuals seeking political asylum within that nation.

And once again, Chrysalis plays us like a damn fiddle because my dear aunt has to try and be so bucking noble. It took a tremendous effort of will for Cadence to not crumple the sheets of paper between her hooves and incinerate it like the trash they were, but she wanted Shining and the other Crystal Guards to see what they were up against. Highly irregular and perhaps more than a touch petty, but having her loyal Guardsponies being fully aware of the limitations placed on them would hopefully make Shining’s burdens lighter, and perhaps with minds less used to the restrictions of ‘polite’ diplomacy, they could come up with a way to get it through Celestia’s thick, houlier-than-thou skull that the only thing the Changelings deserved was a solar-powered hoof up their ponu…

“Your majesty?”

Immediately, Cadence schooled her expression into one of pleasant serenity, beating down the irrational surge of annoyance and guilt as memories of Celestia trying to teach her the ‘Court Face’ and teasing her throughout the ‘lessons’ with scandalous stories and uncannily-placed scrying sensors in the Royal Guard locker-rooms to see if Cadence could hold the expression and posture when exposed to obscene or ludicrous situations.

“Enter, please.” Taking pride in how her voice betrayed nothing but pleasantness, the Crystal Princess’s eyes widened in pleasure as Adamant, her husband’s stoic and reliable second-in-command, entered the room bearing pannier-bags stuffed with cupcakes.

As did another crystal pony, one with a crystalline coat of turquoise and a mane of off-white whom she found, to her distress, she could not place a name to, followed by her husband, both of whom bore similarly-stocked panniers, with the un-named Crystal Pony carrying what appeared to be more cupcakes, and Shining carrying bottles of some sort …

“All okay, Cadence?” Shining asked loudly, mouthing ‘we have reporters outside the train’ as the other two stallions walked into the room and began loudly rummaging around in their carry-bags as they pulled out the baked goods for her perusal.

How in the shadow of Celestia’s fat flanks did they know we’d be coming down this line? The pink Princess thought to herself in bitter surprise as she nodded, hoping Shining understood. “All is well. I just received a message from Princess Celestia. Once all the Guards return to the train, we’ll go over the situation in Canterlot then.”

Reporters meant Ponies who took their marching orders from groups like the Murdock and Muckraker families, let alone that horrible Stump, Ponies who seemed to take offence that somepony could jump over them on the social pecking order by divine intervention, whom had taken great pains over the past few decades to launch smear-campaign after smear-campaign at Celestia, then Cadence when she had first Ascended, then Luna upon her return, and in a move that made Cadence’s blood boil just thinking about it, the wretches had turned their sights on Twilight mere hours after the news of Twilight’s own Ascension had become public knowledge.

Reporters who belonged to those Ponies probably had no idea, or at least Cadence hoped they had no idea, that they were in the pockets of the Shadow Court, however many front-ponies removed. And Murdock and Muckraker were known for outfitting their ‘crown-chaser’ reporters with magical equipment designed to penetrate all but the most elaborate and sophisticated anti-scrying defences, equipment just shy of breaking the laws about the types of powerful magical devices that ordinary civilians could legally own, meaning that you could never know if your more intimate moments with a loved one, or even your most private circumstances might not be recorded by some sick little Pony looking to spin a perfectly innocent situation into something monstrously scandalous for a pay-check.

And Stump … Stump didn’t even bother with that. More than a few Ponies barred from Canterlot or even doing time in Horseshoe Bay owed their misfortune to Stump’s hunger to tear down those above him through scandal and slander-via-media, who would go into the courts fully believing they were simply following corporate orders, that they would be protected against the law-suits as part of their contracts, and would then get thrown to the Timber-Wolves by Stump’s lawyers as ‘rogue employees’ and torn to shreds by the outraged victims of their slanderous writing.

And yet still swarms of Ponies vyed for a place in Stump’s organisation, despite the high-profile cases of his employees being sued for slander and invasion of privacy and the plethora of Ponies whom the fat, rich old mule had burnt over the years to get to where he was.

Everypony has their price, and apparently a lot of reporters prices are the fat wages Stump pays for Ponies who will hound and harass the Throne every chance they get. I wonder if Princess Luna has ever tried to enter his dreams to see what motivated that fat tub of lard to such evil against his fellow Ponies …

“Your Majesty? Errr, Princess Cadence?”

“Hmm? Oh, my apologies, Adamant. I was lost in my thoughts …”

“It is no trouble, your Majesty, but Royal Consort Shining Armor has left to go cast the standard counter-scrying charms on the carriage before the briefing. Before he left, Shining Armor asked us to give you the muffins and then see if you had any other needs before we assumed our posts at the door.”

“I am … fine for now, Gentleponies, although I will ask for some privacy with my little ‘victims’ here.” Cadence forced a grin on her face as she levitated the bags out of the hooves and pannier-bags of the Crystal Guards, a grin that turned decidedly less forced as she caught sight of the goodies inside. Strawberry cupcakes with white chocolate chips! These will be almost as good as Pinkie Pie’s double-chocolated red velvet cupcakes! Bless your heart, Shining, and bless whatever baker had made these!

“As you say, Princess.” Adamant and the un-named Crystal Pony bowed and left her to the cupcakes, taking up flanking positions outside the door before closing it behind them.

A few cupcakes later, and with some sugar and endorphins flowing through her brain, Cadence put the wretched papers from her aunt down on the desk and examined them with fresh eyes, grinning to herself as she eyed the wording and carefully examined them with all the information from her private tutoring from Celestia, and her experiences as the Crown Princess of the Crystal Empire, finding the one thread, the one chink in the armor, that only those closest to Celestia would probably be able to see.

Celestia had certainly stopped Cadence and her Royal Guards from causing a ruckus … but Celestia, poor, good-hearted, noble-to-a-fault Celestia had neglected to add the most powerful weapon in Cadence’s arsenal to that damnable list simply because the Princess of the Sun simply couldn’t conceive that weapon ever being turned on her.

No more. I will not allow Equestria to be invaded again, our Ponies thrown into cocoons and their love sapped way by the Changelings because of my aunt’s foolish notion that every being can be redeemed. If she will not do what is right for the Nation, then I will, and damn the consequences!

Levitating a quill from its holder, Cadence reached for a fresh sheet of paper and an ink-pot, and began writing.

“Dear Princess Twilight …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay … to the first order of business: Pinkie?”

“Yeah, Twilight?”

“I need you to find the Cutiemark Crusaders and bring them back to the library within the next ten minutes. I don’t care how you do it, just bring them back here as soon as you can, and as quietly as you can.”

“But that boooooooooring! Can’t we just …”

“Pinkie, I swear to Faust, just get the Crusaders and bring them back here, please, without making this a song and dance that half of Ponyville gets involved in. Rainbow Dash just explained that when the Crusaders came back to the Apple’s house with the Spellscroll chest, the lock was missing and they admitted to being affected by that infernal, bedamned cake.” Twilight turned and fixed her pink friend with a glare that could have melted through an adamantite door … and was utterly ineffective against Ponyville’s resident Cloud Cuckoolander. “We’ve just had a major falling out with Rarity, all of us, the Element of Generosity just switched Bearers, and Sweetie Belle swore she wouldn’t go home until Rarity apologized, and Faust only knows what kind of spells Sweetie Belle learned from Weeaboo’s Scroll. So do that hoodoo that you do so well, find the Crusaders and bring them home before Sweetie Belle does something rash … or rash-er than whatever it was she and the rest of the Crusaders did to themselves last night.”

“Ah ain’t sure ah wanna know the specifics ‘bout that.” Applejack muttered as she held the door open for the pink party pony to prance down the stairs, looking a little sickly under her now-very creased hat. “There’s some things a big sister shouldn’t know ‘bout, an’ her lil’ sister’s escapaded ‘tween the sheets is pretty high up on that list.”

“Eeeyup.” Big Mac said with a loaded look as his gaze moved from Applejack to Zecora and then to Fluttershy. “An’ we’re gonna have a loooong talk when we get home, lil sis.”

“Ah, buck …” The Farm-Mare took one look at her brother and groaned, pulling her hat over her face, and both Fluttershy and Zecora blushed, although Twilight noted with some surprise that the Zebra was still grinning as she did so. Note to self: Research if all Zebras are as relaxed about sexual situations and encounters as Zecora, or if this is a trait she picked up from her Shaman training or just a personal quirk. The last thing I want to do is offend the ambassador … if Zebrica ever actually sends one.

“Lan’s sake girl, ah’ve still got enough pep in me to grab some soap an’ wash your mouth out!” The elderly matriarch of the Apple Clan fussed, waving her walker with one shaking leg at her grand-daughter. “You watch your language in-front of the Princesses, or so help me Faust, ah’ll tan your hide even tanner! Ah didn’t raise no muck-mothed little sna-”

“Okay, before we get derailed for a third time today … Applejack? I want you to get everypony here downstairs and get some tea and coffee on. We’re going to be having a talk with Filthy Rich and his team, and we could be a while.” Twilight coughed and pointedly ignored the angry look Granny Smith shot her. “I need about five or ten minutes to make sure Spike is doing okay. He took the news about Rarity rather hard, and I want to make sure he understands this is just a temporary spat, we are not losing Rarity as a friend.”

“Really? ‘Cause it seems Rarity isn’t too keen on being a friend to us!” Rainbow Dash snorted angrily, ignoring the smack Applejack delivered to the Pegasus’s good shoulder.

“Rarity got every bone she’s got between her shoulders and her pelvis fractured by your Sonic Rainboom Punch, Rainbow. Whether or not she deserved it is up for debate, but to Rarity’s point of view, she has been punished beyond all reason for somepony else’s mistake.” The purple Princess pointed out, walking to the doorway of her bedroom with a fatigued stride, her wings drooping slightly. “And as far as Spike is concerned, the Mare he’s been pining after for the past three years just got assaulted by another Mare he greatly looks up to. And to make matters worse, Spike is probably afraid that Rarity might cut all ties with us, and shun him by association, so right now he’s probably being torn in half between his family and his crush ...”

“I will leave young Spike’s heart in your hooves, Twilight, and see to it that nopony enters the library until Filthy Rich and yourself deem it safe.” The Lunar Princess offered as she levitated Granny Smith into the air, the old Mare’s joints too inflamed with arthritis and the steep climb up Twilight’s stairwell to risk a trip down on her own power. “You know him best of all out of all of us.”

Do I? Twilight found herself thinking as she followed the rest of the Ponies down the stairs, then took a sharp left towards the door that led to her basement, grimacing as she took the stairs in complete darkness. Spike had turned the lights off … Not a good sign.

“Spike?” Twilight called into the darkness, wanting to light her horn, but given that Spike had purposefully plunged the room into complete darkness, she felt the need to respect that choice. Faust knew, her little brother had little enough control over things right now. If he wanted this darkness, she’d let him have it.

“Hey … Twilight. Just … just give me a second, I’ll turn on the lights.” Spike’s voice, thick with emotion, sounded from the other side of the room, and the new Alicorn waited patiently for Spike to shuffle over to the light-switch. Being a Dragon, he could see in the dark perfectly well, or at least he should have been able to, but then again, not even the Royal Archivist had been able to identify which of the many sub-species of Dragons that Spike belong to, and Princess Celestia had always deflected the subject …

“When you’re ready, Spike. I know the past few days have been rough. Rougher than usual, at least.”

“That’s the understatement of the century…” Spike muttered as he flicked the switch up with a stubby claw, and Twilight winced as she saw her little brother’s eyes had turned red from crying. “You and Luna became accidental lesbians, another crazy stalker of yours invades our home and Mom nearly evaporates the library with an overpowered spell of binding, and now Rarity is … is acting like a complete foal!”

Twilight blinked. Slowly. Then rapidly several times. Then slowly again. Her brain was trying to process two very alarming, competing ideas at the same time and it had an obvious effect on Twilight as her blinking was rapidly joined by a nervous tic at the corner of her mouth.

Wait, another crazy stalker? And Spike said Rarity, RARITY of all Ponies, is acting like a foal? Twilight’s panicked, fatigued brain screamed at her. Quick! You are the older sibling, the responsible big sister, you need to take charge of the situation and be a pillar of support for Spike right now!

“Wuuuuuuh?” Twilight said loudly, wings falling limp at her side to the point her feathers trailed along the ground as she staggered over to Spike and squeezed him into a hug.

… Buck it, I’m out. Twilight’s mind sighed, turning around and walking out a doorway that led to Twilight’s subconscious.

“Yeaaaaah, you know, the Ponies that were trying to sneak into the library after hours to leave love-notes on your pillow, or watch you sleep. Why else do you think I keep sleeping in a basket at the end of your bed after all these years?” Spike half-sniffed, half-laughed as he returned the hug, oblivious to the fact he had just caused his older sister to have a small mental hiccup. “You did … know about them, right Twilight?”

“Hamurparumpft.” Twilight replied as her face spasmed in ways nature never intended, her hind-legs, wings and tail now doing a rather accurate representation of one of Pinkie Pie’s ‘Pinkie Sense’ dances as she stroked Spike’s head-fin with a forehoof.

“…Huh. I don’t know if I should be offended you never noticed, or grateful that you’re not going into a full psychotic meltdown while holding my head between your hooves.”

A short while later, once emergency chest-rubs and chin-scratches had been administered to a twitching Princess of Friendship and Twilight had been turned away from turning Ponyville into a smoking pile of magically-charred rubble, Spike and Twilight found themselves sharing Spike’s basket, with the young Drake sitting in the Alicorn’s lap with Twilight’s forelimbs wrapped around him and Twilight nuzzling the Spike’s head and crest.

“…And you’re sure you’re okay?” Twilight murmured, enjoying the feel of Spike’s body cradled against her own, feeling safe in the solitude and silence of her ‘experiment’ room with her baby brother in her hooves. “With Rarity? With Luna and I and everything that’s going to change?”

“No. But I’ll manage, so long as you and the others don’t leave me behind. It’s kind of lonely without you guys, you know? The Cutiemark Crusaders are always off doing their own thing and since I’m a Dragon and can’t get a Cutie Mark, I don’t get invited on their adventures much these days, and Snips and Snails spend most afternoons at supplementary lessons with Cherilee these days, so I’m … I’m on my own a lot.”

Twilight squeezed her little brother tighter, feeling her heart prick in pain. Has Spike had to deal with this all alone while I just … lived? Caught up in friendship and my studies and … no, focus Twilight! Focus on Spike and what he needs right now.

“What if I asked Cherilee if I could help tutor Snips and Snails? Then you three could hang out more often?”

“That’d be … all kinds of awesome, actually. But are you sure? I like Snips and Snails, but they’re … they’re not really good students like the Crusaders are. They only turn up to school because it’s less hassle than what they’d get for skipping Cherilee’s classes.”

“I’ll take a pair of slacker truants over any world-ending threats like Nightmare Moon, Discord or Changeling Invasions. Besides, maybe if they can have a reward like my hair-increasing spells, they might be inclined to put some effort into studying, and they might learn that learning can be fun!”

“… I’m agreeing to this only because I am going to get a kick out of watching an immovable object meet an unstoppable force.”

“Eh?”

“Your enthusiasm for studying versus Snips and Snails apathy towards it.”

“Oh ha ha ha. I’m sure I can at least bump their grades up to a B-. At least.”

“If you can manage that, I’ll agree to go on that diet you keep bugging me about.”

“Weeeeeeell … you’re a growing Dragon, so I really don’t want to cut down on your gems.” Twilight hummed and rocked back and forth, giggling to herself as she imagined Spike’s pitiful expression at losing access to his beloved gems. But that would be far too cruel, especially after Spike has been so brave and understanding. “How about if I fail to increase Snips and Snail’s average grade by the end of the year, I redo our schedules so you can have Saturday’s off, every week, so you can go spend time with your friends regardless?”

“And if I sabotage my friends’ lessons, I’ll be hurting their chances of employment later on in life. Very cunning, Princess Twilight …” Spike teased, tickling her chin with a claw as Twilight spluttered in protest. “Not that I’m saying Cherilee is a bad teacher, but between the Crusaders, Snips and Snails, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, I’m amazed she hasn’t … well, pulled a Twilight.”

“I know where you store your emergency icecream supplies, buster.” Twilight half-teased, half-threatened as she snuggled Spike one last time before levitating him out of her lap and onto his own claws before getting up herself, a frown marring her features. “I’d ask if you wanted to be a part of the meeting upstairs, but you’ve had a hell of a morning. We all have, but …”

“Yeah, I’d rather not deal with anypony else right now if I could avoid it. I just want to settle down here, get my things set up the way I want them … and eat a bucket of ice-cream till I feel better.” The young drake muttered, scuffing his feet along the floor as he refused to meet Twilight’s eyes. Feeling a surge of understanding for Spike, Twilight embraced him again, ruffling his spines with a hoof as she felt her little brother’s claws grab onto her in a desperate hug.

“If everything wasn’t so serious upstairs, I’d join you.” She whispered to Spike, who sniffled and gave a weak chuckle. “You with your comics, me with some Daring Do novels, a bucket of ice-cream for each of us and everypony else excluded from the library for the day.”

“Go back to your old ways of reading and studying all day long, and miss out on the wonders of Element Bearer-ness? Surely you could not possibly even think such things, Princess Twilight!”

“Oh go eat coal, you little flamethrower.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I’m not going home.” Sweetie Belle sulked, while beside her, Scootaloo and Apple Bloom both gnawed ineffectively at the bonds of saltwater taffy that bound them together, doing more damage to their fur than the irritatingly sticky taffy ropes.

“You’re not going home, Silly-Filly, you’re going to the library! Twilight wants to talk to you, and then she and Princess Luna are gonna fix eeeeeeeeeeeeeverything, and then Rarity will apologise and be our friend again, and then, then we can have a party!” Pinkie replied, bouncing down the street with the three young Mares stuck in Scootaloo’s cart, being jerked back and forth in their ‘vehicle’ with every prance the irrepressible pink party pony.

“Be tha’ as ith mhay?” Apple Bloom chimed in, trying vainly to unstick her lips from the half-melted taffy gumming up her face. “Dith it reawy nee’ aww thwee of us?”

“My feathers are going to be a mess!” Scootaloo complained bitterly, looking at her small wings which, thanks to the copious amounts of drool she and Apple Bloom had created trying to chew out of the ropes of taffy with which Pinkie had bound them.

Ponies in the street stopped to look at the display, then shrugged and moved on, or shuddered and moved as fast as they felt they could and not attract Pinkie Pie’s attention. Pinkie Pie may have been beloved by the Ponies of Ponyville despite all her bizarre antics and inexplicable ‘quirks’, and the Cutiemark Crusaders were an infamous but amusing trio that kept the various businesses specializing in building and repairs in business, but put together, especially after yesterday’s events, the four Ponies together was enough to make even the most stalwart hearts decide discretion was the better part of valor.

“Besides, I think Twilight is reaaaaaaaally gonna need to fix whatever you three did to yourselves that makes me have a nose-twitchy-twitchy-twitch double-back-leg-shake tail-swish Pinkie Alert. I don’t get those very often …” Pinkie Pie grinned back at the trio as the Library came into view, the bizarre pink earth-pony somehow able to navigate around the corner and miss the Ponies in her path despite looking the wrong way. “… but if she can’t, maybe your Auntie Pinkie can help?”

The Crusaders looked at Pinkie Pie, blinked slowly once in unison and then burst into panicked stammering.

“Ah-ah don’t think that’s legal, Pinkie.” Apple Bloom managed to squeak the words out, face turning as red as her mane as the Crusaders struggled to get their hooves in place to hide their lower bodies, all three grimacing as the likely-unintended ‘offer’ caused their imaginations to run wild, which put uncomfortable pressure on the ‘tuck’ spell every Pony was taught shortly after learning to walk.

“What isn’t legal? I meant we could go to the Princesses, well, I mean the other Princesses, not Twilight, although Luna is here, so I guess we wouldn’t have to take a train to Canterlot immediately, but if Luna doesn’t know, but Celestia does, or Luna does know but she needs a book from the Castle …”

“S’gonna be a loooong day.” Scootaloo muttered darkly as Sweetie Belle and Applebloom nodded sadly as Pinkie babbled on, somehow having gone from Princesses to tubas and singing crystals, while the Library, and their inevitable doom, slowly drew closer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Pinkie, did you … oh. Well then … uh, girls, use the shower and if you could stay in my bedroom until I can sit down and talk to the three of you?” Twilight Sparkle went through another breathing exercise as she took in Pinkie’s huge smile and the tangled mass of bickering ponies in the cart behind her, mushed together with half-eaten, half-mangled strands of sticky saltwater taffy that had apparently gotten everywhere. “I think by the time you get all that taffy out of your manes at least, we should be done down here.”

“I think I’m going to lose half my feathers getting this muck out of my wings.”

“Thanth Twi’wight, thwe ‘pweciathe it.”

“I’m not going home till Rarity apologises, so don’t even think one of your lectures will work!”

“Ooooookay then …” The purple princess plastered on a smile to avoid further arguments as the Crusaders awkwardly got up on a mis-matched number of limbs and half-hopped, half-crawled their collective way up the stairs, the expressions on their faces promising doom to anypony who tried to help them.

“Well, since Miss Pie is here now, and from what Miss Fluttershy and Granny Smith have told me, Miss Rarity is unlikely to be an Element Bearer for the foreseeable future, as well as having a flock of Nightguard hovering over her head, let us begin before something else goes wrong.” Filthy Rich began after the adults gathered in the library heard the bathroom door slam shut, an expression of tired amusement on his face. “Miss Applejack, Miss Fluttershy, Miss Pie and Miss Dash, allow me to reintroduce ourselves. Snowflake, Derpy Hooves, Octavia, Vinyl Scratch and myself are all Royal Agents, and have been keeping an eye on, and an eye out, for all of you since you became Element Bearers.”

“Two of our little group, Time Turner and Ditch, couldn’t make it today due to needing to keep the reporters infesting our quiet little town away from the library for this meeting, but you will be introduced to them as soon as equinely possible. Also, two more Royal Agents have been dispatched from Canterlot to oversee your protection.” The brown-coated stallion continued, apparently immune to the surprised or, in the case of Rainbow Dash, outraged looks being thrown in his direction. “They were scheduled to arrive sometime around nine-thirty or so, which means they are running late, and I fear their appearance will lead to some hard questions being asked of all of us.”

“Wait, back up, back the buck up. Derpy Hooves and Bulk Bic-.”

“My name is ‘Snowflake’. I go by the name Bulk Biceps because Ponyville is the kind of town that can’t handle Ponies having names that don’t match up to their Cutie Ma-.” Snowflake interrupted, earning a violent snort from Rainbow Dash.

“BULK BICEPS are Royal Agents? WHAT? They’re supposed to be smooth, handsome stallions or elegant, cool mares! Like Jam Bond!” The blue Pegasus snapped, slapping a hoof on the couch with her wings rustling with her ill-temper. “How can the least-effective mail-mare in Equestria and a … a … what do you even do, Bulk?”

“Like I said, my name is ‘Snowflake’, not Bulk Biceps. That’s a fake name I go by for … you aren’t even listening, are you?” The bulky white Pegasus sighed and shook his head, sighing softly as Octavia patted him on the back in consolation. “My cover-story in Ponyville is that ‘Bulk Biceps’ works odd-jobs, like labourer, brick-layer, really anything requiring physical effort. Which allows me to move around town and keep an eye on you girls without it seeming strange.”

“Ah’m sorry ‘bout Rainbow’s mouth, but ah gotta ask, why did none o’ yah ever say anythin’? S’not like we couldn’t have used a helpin’ hoof at times.” Applejack added, looking at the Royal Agents, blinking rapidly and then fixing her gaze squarely on Filthy Rich, who merely smiled wanly back at her.

“Two reasons, Miss Applejack. Firstly, we had orders from Canterlot Command that we were only to break cover and assist if any of the Element Bearers were in a situation where their lives were in danger to try and help foster your friendships and to help you all avoid becoming dependant upon outside help, to ensure you focused on using your own unique talents and the powers of the Elements of Harmony. And secondly, while we may be Royal Agents, for the most part we are trained to blend in and notice things other Ponies would miss or ignore.” The middle-aged ‘store owner’ replied pleasantly, giving a short, soft laugh at the way Rainbow was prevented from a diatribe about how ‘uncool’ that was by Pinkie pulling a length of saltwater taffy out of her mane and shoving it into the Pegasus’s mouth. “Unlike what the movies and novels might tell you, and I assure you they are all works of fiction and flights of fancy, most Royal Agents are not superior combatants. When it comes to combat, Vinyl Scratch, Time Turner and myself aren’t trained in anything other than basic self-defence, and Vinyl and Octavia’s abilities are not especially effective when it comes to head-on conflicts. That just leaves Derpy Hooves, our Vapormancer, Snowflake, our sole combat expert, and Ditch … who isn’t even a Pony, which means if he gets involved in a fight in the town, half the Ponies would blame him for the trouble in the first place and the other half would just run around in a blind panic at the sight of him, screaming like headless chickens.”

“Awwww, but Ditch is nice! Dinky loves tea-time with him.” Derpy pointed out, earning a scoff from Octavia and setting Snowflake and Vinyl to muffled giggling.

“Yes, well, little Dinky could charm the horns off an angry Minotaur, but it doesn’t change the fact that, for all the non-Equines in Equestria, Ponies in this town can be disturbingly … close-minded when it comes to outsiders.” Filthy replied, rolling his eyes as Granny Smith gave him a sad look. “Come on, Granny, you of all Ponies should know I’m right. A stampede of rabbits caused a mad panic, let alone when the cows living on your farm got startled by a snake and almost came stampeding through the town. Faust only knows what they’d do if they saw a Diamond Dog walking around town.”

“…Wait. Ditch is a Diamond Dog?” Twilight asked, leaning against Luna as her tired mind tried to keep up with what she was hearing. A Royal Agent was a Diamond Dog?

“Yes … is that a problem, your Highness?”

“No, but I was always under the assumption that Royal Agents were only recruited from individuals born inside Equestria’s borders …”

“Oh, he’s a Canterlite, just like you, Twilight Sparkle.” Octavia said tartly, raising her tea and delicately drinking it in a manner that painfully reminded Twilight of how Rarity would act, a smirk on her face. “Ditch’s Pack maintains the sewers and underground passages of the Castle itself, so it’s not surprisingly that, growing up in the Castle and surrounded by the Nobility as you were, you didn’t know he even existed.”

Ouch … Twilight winced at the other Mare’s sour tone. “That … is also a good point. Between lessons with Princess Celestia and trips home to see my family, I really didn’t get out much in Canterlot.”

“A good point, but perhaps an unnecessary one.” Filthy Rich pointed out, glaring pointedly at Octavia, whose smirk faded into a bland expression. “The point is, there are a number of Royal Agents who are not Ponies, and they are all completely loyal to the Throne and Equestria herself. Minotaurs, Diamond Dogs, Donkies, even a few Orcs and Sea Ponies, all are part of our order. This … won’t be an issue for you, will it, Princess Twilight?”

“W-what? No, no of course not, I’m just a little … lost at this point. So much is going on, there’s so many things I’m trying to wrap my head around, I’m probably going to make a fool of myself and say something silly.” The purple Alicorn shrugged, giving Rich an apologetic look as she diddled her fore-hooves against each other nervously.

“Excellent. You have no idea how many times other Squad-Leaders have tried to swap posts with me. Looking after a national hero is a huge honor, after all, and if you did have issues with non-Pony Royal Agents, I’d imagine quite a few teams would be out of the running … and be crushed besides.”

“Speaking of ‘crushed’, maybe we should talk about …” Luna began, before a loud banging began on the library door.

“Manure. Agents, up the stairs and prepare for escape-plan alpha-nine. Princess Twilight, I’ll stay down here to identify if this is the other Agents, if you don’t object?” Filthy Rich muttered, the other Agents saluting smartly and rushing to the stairs leading to the upper stories of the library, leaving Filthy Rich, Twilight, Luna, the remaining Element Bearers and a very startled-looking Trixie in the library’s public area.

“I don’t think my objection would mean a damn thing, the way everything has gone over the past few days.” Twilight replied tartly, getting up and trotting to the door as her horn flickered, massaging her face into a reasonable approximation of a friendly smile before she put a hoof on the door-knob to open it. “Hello! I’m sorry, but due to unforeseeable … issues, the Golden Oaks Library is closed for today!”

“Awwww, but I was told a library was the best place to find issues!”

“…That is the lamest pun I’ve ever heard you make, boss, and that’s saying something.”

Cracking the door open a smidge, Twilight peered out, catching sight of a golden wing … and blue fabric with a distinctive pale-yellow lightning bolt. The sight shocked her so much that when the door was yanked away from her hoof, Twilight was unable to muster the wits to use her magic to grab it back as two Pegasi grinned at her like sharks smelling blood in the water.

“Princess, Ma’am, Spitfire and Soaring, reporting for duty!” Spitfire snapped a crisp salute off, still grinning like a maniac, while Soarin simply rolled his eyes and gave a more casual wave with a forehoof. “And I see the home-team has made themselves at home!”

“Dear sweet Faaaaaaust. Alright, team, back to your seats, it's just the johnny-come-latelies from Canterlot.” Filthy Rich groaned, placing a hoof to his face and sagging against the back of the couch as the rest of the Royal Agents came down the stairs, their faces splitting into broad grins to match those of Soarin and Spitfire. “Well, don’t stand there all day, you two. Shut that door before the white-noise generators burn out from all the additional space they’ll be trying to blanket, and introduce yourselves properly.”

“Still trying to protect Equestria from behind a till, eh Filthy?” Spitfire said, eyeballing the seated Stallion with a smug expression on her face.

“Still don’t understand the concept of subtlety, eh Spits?” Filthy Rich shot back, although the corners of his mouth had quirked up into the same wan smile as before.

“Still can’t fight to save your life, hey Richie?”

“Still won’t accept not every problem can be solved by smothering it in machismo, hey Splatfire?”

“Still can’t … Ooop, the Princesses are staring at us.”

“Yes, the Princesses are staring at you, wondering why on Equis you’re bickering like a married couple.” Luna grated out, her eyes narrowing to slits as she apparently tried to bore holes into the Wonderbolt and the Shop-Owner with just her willpower alone. “From what my sister says, I had expected the Royal Agents to be more … professional.”

“Spitfire is a Royal Agent … Soarin is a Royal Agent … Derpy is a Royal Agent … Bulk Biceps is a Royal Agent…” Rainbow Dash was whispering to herself, holding her broken, sling-supported limb to her chest and rocking back and forth on her cushion with a thousand-yard stare, and the rest of the Ponies in the room, barring the two Princesses and the Royal Agents, weren’t doing too much better, although the Royal Agents at least had the decency to look embarrassed as they took their seats again.

“Errr …” Soarin offered, roughly shoving his fellow Wonderbolt into the Library and then kicking the door shut behind them. “Don’t mind Spitfire and Rich, they’re old sparring partners from the Order's planning meetings. They belong to different … philosophies within the Order, I guess would be the best way to describe it. Spitfire’s side of things thinks the Royal Agents should be more proactive and reclaim some of our old legal powers, while Rich’s side thinks we shouldn’t reach for more power than what we’ve got.”

“And every time the two sides get together, they do … that.” Vinyl finished, waving to the Stallion, who gave her a jaunty wave back as his eyes scanned the room.

Twilight noted as she seated herself next to Luna again that when Soarin’s eyes passed over Applejack’s face, the Stallion paused for several seconds, mouth opening slightly, before moving on to the rest of the Ponies in the room.

And what the hay was that about? Twilight thought to herself, hoping that any further shenanigans would kindly reschedule to tomorrow, when she wasn’t running off coffee, adrenaline and sheer bloody spite for her sleeping patterns.

“Oh that’s just grand then. My sister has sent two Ponies from opposing factions within the Royal Agent to work together. Stupendous, even.”

“Errr, the situation is not quite that bad, your Majesty. While the pro-reform and anti-reform groups might bicker, we’re all loyal to Equestria and the Crowns. It’s more like … it’s more like a sibling rivalry than active political bickering.” Filthy Rich explained, scratching at the back of his head with a neatly manicured hoof as Spitfire nodded enthusiastically. “Some of us believe we shouldn’t have more power to avoid potential issues with rogue agents in the future and to keep in-line with our Royal Charter, while others believe the changing political structures of the nations outside of Equestria demands that we overhaul the organisation to compensate. It’s mostly an academic debate since the only ones who could order those changes made are yourself and Princess Celestia, as the Princesses who signed our original Charter.”

“Be that as it may, why would my sister send two of her Wonderbolts, if stealth and subterfuge are so important to mister Rich’s team? Half of Equestria will turn up for autographs if the famous Captain and Co-Captain of the world-renown Wonderbolts appear in town.” The Lunar Princess sighed and rubbed at her temples with both forehooves as the two Wonderbolts joined the group of limping and frazzled Ponies on the couches. “Between Twilight and myself, there’s enough bait here to keep the paparazzi in town for weeks. Adding two celebrities to the mix feels like we are dodging fireballs while standing on a field soaked in naphtha.”

“Before you ask, Rainbow Dash, naphtha was a flammable substance made from peat, tar and oil the ancient Equestrians used to pour over their enemies and then set alight, and I have to add my concern to Luna's here, this seems like a bad idea. We’re already having enough troubles with the media, having both of you here is just going to draw even more attention to us.” Levitating her cup of tea up to her lips, Twilight gave an apologetic smile to the two newcomers.

“That’s the point, Princess Twilight. Soarin and I are here to distract the reporters and gossip-mongers. What’s as intriguing as two Princesses? Two of the highest-ranking Wonderbolts taking a vacation in a tiny little country town. They’ll be chasing after us for days just trying to figure out if we’ve quit the Wonderbolts, have come to town to have a fling or something even more ‘scandalous’.” Scoffing, Spitfire tossed her orange mane back from her face and gave a wicked grin to Twilight again. “Not to steal your thunder, but you’re not a super-star yet. The fact that Princess Celestia has expended so much influence and horse-power keeping what you all actually do a secret from the press probably helps as well.”

“Oh, don’t remind me.” Filthy Rich sighed and took a long slurp of his coffee. “Between them wrangling beasties back into the Everfree Forest and trotting off to who-knows-where every other week, we’d be swimming in paparazzi if the Princess hadn’t ordered all evidence of the Bearer’s actions to be considered classified.”

“And speaking of Bearers … aren’t we missing somepony?” Spitfire asked loudly, raising an eyebrow as the rest of the room groaned in dismay. “What? What did I miss?”

“That is … going to take some time to explain …” Twilight began, offering a silent prayer to Faust for the emotional stamina to get through another retelling of the morning’s debacle.

Chapter 52 (MAXIMUM CLOP)

CHAPTER 52

It was awkward. Painfully awkward. Standing under the hot shower in a tangle of limbs, fur and partially-melted taffy and struggling against each other as their bindings slowly gave way and started to melt reminded Scootaloo uncomfortably about what the Crusaders had done to each other last night, and the young Pegasus kept on beating down the urge to turn her efforts to getting loose from the tangle of limbs and taffy into trying to get something into her friends. Again. Or maybe something of theirs into her.

Despite how good it felt when the softness under Sweetie Belle’s tail rubbed several times against Scootaloo’s new ‘limb’, or how great Applebloom was at preening the sticky residue of the taffy out from the orange pegasus’s feathers, Scootaloo kept telling herself it was probably a bad idea to start up what happened last night again … even if she spent a considerable amount of willpower telling the newest part of herself to go away.

The only thing that saved Scootaloo from complete humiliation was that both of her fellow Crusaders had also sprouted to a small degree, the same as her, and Applebloom quickly derailed the conversation to more comfortable waters by asking if the other Crusaders wanted to just soak under the hot water or use the coconut-scented body-wash to try and mask the delicious smell of taffy that was stubbornly clinging to their feathers and fur.

“I’ll grab the hot water first, if nopony minds?” Sweetie Belle said after several moments of quiet thought as warm mist from the shower filled the room. “I … kind of need to clean up, like, really badly. The pond was okay, but I really wasn’t going to wash up in cold water.”

“Yeah, not the best experience, but at least the cold water helped with the … you know … chafing.” Scootaloo said bluntly, earning a blast of water from a blushing Sweetie Belle before the young Unicorn manipulated the shower-head to deliver intense streams of hot water over and down the crown of her head and neck.

“Can we not talk ‘bout how we just about banged each other into a coma last night?” Applebloom muttered softly, picking up a soft-bristled scrubbing brush, squeezing a hoof-ful of the body-wash onto it and started scrubbing at her damp fur. “Kinda ain’t sure how we’re supposed t’deal with this.”

“We’re still all friends, we’re just a lot closer today than we were yesterday, or at least that’s how I see it.” Scootaloo protested, grabbing a rebellious feather on one of her small wings and straightening it, eyeing the spread of her feathers with a critical eye. Not being able to fly had made the young Pegasus almost Twilight-levels of pedantic about her wing-hygiene, as if to prove it wasn’t her fault that the skies were still denied to her, but rather Fate being a fickle whorse. “Although I kinda wish Twilight could take her time with a counter-spell. Last night was fun. Crazy, but fun.”

“Ah think we’ve had enough crazy for a lil’ while. Don’t get me wrong, ah liked what we did last night jus’ as much as you did, but ah think Granny might have a fit if ah came home with a fat belly at my age.” Applebloom pointed out morosely, taking the sud-covered brush and tackling her other flank, the competing smells of coconut and taffy filling the air. “And we still haven’t gotten any of those pills Cherilee was talkin’ about during Sex Ed, so who knows if we’ve gone an’ knocked each other up!”

“Cutiemark Crusader Herd-Mates?” Scootaloo offered with a chuckle, before getting blasted in the face with a stream of water from Sweetie Belle again. “Pfffwaagh! Sweetie, it was just a suggestion! Besides, it’s not like we got any cards from anypony else on Hearts and Hooves day this year!”

“Scoots, you’re one of my best friends, but I don’t think I could handle being your Herd-Mate. Especially since it would be just three Mares, all pregnant and with no Stallion is stepping forwards to claim responsibility.” Moving the shower-head around her body to blast out the last traces of taffy from her fur, Sweetie Belle shot her fellow Crusaders a loaded look that made both Scootaloo and Apple Bloom cough and look down at the bottom of the bathtub to avoid the heat of the glare. “Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon already give us enough grief about not having our Cutie Marks at our age. Do you really want them to start on us being blank-flanked mothers?”

“Well if we can get some of those morning-after pills, it won’t be an issue, will it?” The Pegasus shot back, wiping the excess water off the soft fur on her face with a hoof. “Speaking of which, should we ask Twilight for some after we wash up?”

“Ah, mah sister says Twilight’s ‘bout as attentive to romance as a rock is to rain. Ah’d be willin’ to bet she don’t even have a condom.”

“Great. So … sneak down to the pharmacy after Twilight lectures us, grab a hoof-ful and cross our hooves, hope for the best?”

“Oh Faust, why does sex have to feel so good? I don’t think we can go back after this …” Sweetie mumbled unhappily as her magic manipulated the shower-head down and under her barrel, and Scootaloo’s eyes widened as she saw the thick, coarse streams of water from the shower-head pounding away at the now-fully extended shaft flexing under Sweetie’s belly.

Scootaloo’s mouth opened to comment, but her throat felt too constricted to push any words out. Memories from the night before kept pushing their way into her mind, of being tangled with her friends in ways that made her blood boil just thinking about and silly, foolish endearments spilling from their mouths with every thrust, every sweet noise they’d made as they’d pushed back against each other …

“Oh mah staaaars …” Scootaloo flinched as she heard Applebloom whisper next to her, the farm-mare’s eyes glued to scene before them both. “Do you think she’s forgotten we’re here?”

“Faust I … kinda hope … so? Or not. Either way works.” Scootaloo whispered back, risking a glance down under Apple Bloom and flushing when she confirmed her other friend had also fully ‘sprouted’ and had a hoof held firmly against her new limb, moving slowly and softly. “I bet Sweetie Belle’s just not thinking right …”

Both Crusaders stopped talking, their eyes bulging as Sweetie Belle’s magic manipulated the shower-head again, the coarse streams of water pounding across her flat belly and dancing shaft down to the cleft between her legs and the base of the newest addition to the Crusaders’ collective armaments, the young Unicorn’s head lifting sharply into the air as the streams of hot water rudely introduced themselves to a very tender part of her anatomy.

Okay, it’s official, we’ve got sex on the brain now! Scootaloo gulped and thought guiltily as her eyes drank in the sight of her friend’s most secret place being pummelled by the streams, savouring the itchy heat it produced inside her in turn as … “…Wah!”

“Sssssh!” Applebloom hissed, dipping her muzzle down under Scootaloo’s chest and lipping at the bobbing head of Scootaloo’s new limb. “W-we’re jus’ gonna make sure we ain’t gonna sprout later, make our tallywhackers too pooped to peek out later! Mah tuck spell ain’t workin’ so good with two things ‘tween mah legs, an’ ah bet yours ain’t workin’ neither!”

“Y-yeah, I guess …” Scootaloo whispered back, biting her lip to restrain any further sounds, either groans or words, as she felt Applebloom’s mouth slowly take in the head, and then withdraw slightly, a new, welcome sensation that stirred up memories of last night’s fun as hard teeth and soft lips contrasted sharply with a wet tongue that slowly took in a little more of her with every bob of Applebloom’s head, causing Scootaloo to hunch a little in time to her friend’s movements. “B-but what about you?”

“Hwuff hour houff!”

“What?”

“Use your mouth!” Applebloom said again, stopping her wonderful actions long enough to roll her eyes at Scootaloo. The two young Ponies shot a cautious look at Sweetie Belle, who had apparently become lost in the glorious powers of the shower-head, before arranging themselves in a cramped circle in the confines of the bath, awkwardly experimenting on each other with hooves and tongues.

There was no lust-crazed attacks on each other like what they had suffered last night, although Scootaloo did feel the deepest part of her clench and itch for want of something to fill it, to grip against something hot and hard and …

Parting Applebloom’s moist folds, Scootaloo lipped tentatively at the hidden pink depths, earning an eager whimper of approval from Applebloom before trying a firm, solid lick. The taste was … not as intoxicating as it had been the night before, but it was not displeasing either. But more encouraging was Applebloom’s response, a gently nibbling of the swelling nub at the top of Scootaloo’s own depths caused the young Pegasus’s wings to shoot out of their own accord, and a long, slow drag of her tongue along the underside of Scootaloo’s new limb made the Crusader’s head spin for several moments before she reciprocated, awkwardly pulling Applebloom’s length to face towards her before trying to mimic Applebloom’s bobbing motions from before.

Which proved to be hard, and not in the good way. Applebloom was obviously very excited, judging from the fact her head was visibly flaring, which made slipping the head into Scootaloo’s mouth a lot more work than fun.

But this thing fit inside me … Scootaloo thought in quiet wonder as she polished the shaft as best she could manage. And it felt good. Really good. Like, better than a triple-ice-cream sundae on a hot day good. As-good-as-flying-must-feel good.

Pulling away from Applebloom was considerably easier than she thought it would be, as Scootaloo positioned herself over the prone Earth-Pony, one hoof holding the confused Applebloom’s shaft as Scootaloo squatted over her friend and then began rubbing the flared head back and forth between her folds.

It felt good. I felt good.

Groaning softly, Scootaloo let herself drop slowly, biting her lip to muffle any sound she might make as the swelling head pushed through her entrance before slipping inside, the rest of the shaft being greeted eagerly by the young Pegasus’s squirming depths, while Applebloom apparently had no such compulsions, groaning loudly with both fore-hooves reaching up to pressing into Scootaloo’s lithe plot to either support Scootaloo, or try to pull her down, the Pegasus wasn’t sure.

Down, then up, then down a little more, again and again, Scootaloo’s own shaft bouncing erratically with each thrust, each withdrawl, her own head slapping at times against Scootaloo’s belly, at other times inertia causing it to swing down and pap against the wet floor of the bathtub or the now-soaked region between Applebloom’s own legs, fully accessible as the Farm-Mare spread her legs wide to allow Scootaloo to drop down further, to take more of Applebloom inside of her.

I want more … Scootaloo thought to herself, slowing her thrusts long enough to push her shaft down, wincing at the pressure as something inside her protested at being bent this way before her own shaft’s head nudged into the hot, entrancing heat of Applebloom’s body, and she dropped down again.

Both mares gave up any semblance of subtlety or restraint, loud moans spilling from their lips as two glistening pink shafts plunged past each other with only millimetres to spare, swelling flares grinding and scraping at their insides as median rings pummelled their swollen entrances, their loins a tangle of sopping fur and milky secretions, Applebloom awkwardly thrusting upwards as Scootaloo dropped herself down again and again on shaking limbs, the Pegasus’s tail lifted and pushed to the side so a wide-eyed Applebloom could keep her eyes locked on the lewd connection between herself and her friend.

“Scoots, ah’m so close, ah’m so close!” Applebloom panted from behind her, and looking over her shoulder, the Pegasus gave a loose, panting grin, shaking her hips left to right as she plunged up and down, bracing herself against the bathroom wall with one hoof as the other kept its position at the base of her shaft, keeping it pointed firmly downwards and firmly inside her friend’s intoxicating depths.

“M-me too. Do it, ‘Bloom. I want it, you want it, let’s do it.” Scootaloo managed to force the words out past her grunts and groans, delighting in the sensations she was both giving and receiving, and also in the expression of pleasure that had claimed her friend’s face. I’m doing this to her. Me. She is feeling so good because of me. And then a thought came to Scootaloo.

They’d get the pills soon. Twilight would fix this … probably regardless of what the Crusaders wanted. So why not enjoy this to the fullest?

“We’re inside each other, Applebloom. We’re so deep inside each other … so bucking plough me, ‘Bloom. Put them Apple seeds right in my belly!”

The dirty talk had the intended effect, although perhaps beyond the scope of what Scootaloo had thought it would, with the young farm-pony’s eyes widening, then scrunching up as Applebloom bucked with renewed vigor beneath her, threatening to dislodge Scootaloo from her perch, the vigorous pap pap pap noise of their lovemaking growing by an order of magnitude, as did Scootaloo’s cries as she found herself being rag-dolled around on her delicious perch, bouncing around with barely any control, her body spasming of it’s own accord as she felt that amazing feeling building up inside her again, sparkles of light appearing in her vision as it came closer and closer and clos …

One of Scootaloo’s hooves slipped at a critical moment as she rose up to bury Applebloom inside her for the finale, the Pegasus squawking in alarm as both she and Applebloom popped out of each other before she fell backwards, landing ontop of her lover with enough force to make them both see stars of the wrong kind, their lower halves vainly pumping for into empty air.

“Owwww …” Scootaloo whimpered, the amazing sensations fading quickly as she felt her rigid wings protesting being squashed against Applebloom and the walls of the bathtub.

“You okay, Scoots?” Scootaloo sighed in frustration as two yellow hooves circled her and held her close, her friend’s breath hot and welcome against the back of her head. “Didn’t hurt your wings?”

“Y-yeah, they’re fine. Sorry, ‘Bloom. It kinda got … crazy again, huh?”

“Yeah, but I liked that kind of crazy …”

“Are you two done now?”

Both prone Mares’ heads shot up, although Applebloom was somewhat restricted by the body ontop of her, and for several moments there was silence, before Applebloom and Scootaloo burst into giggling.

Obviously, while they had been absorbed in each other, Sweetie Belle had turned around to see what the commotion was, and at the end, had been rather close to them when Scootaloo had fallen over.

Thus, she ‘wore’ most of what Scootaloo and Applebloom had let go. It dripped from her face, her neck and chest, even her legs. And there was some on the walls, some dripped from the ceiling and there were even ropey strands connecting the shower-curtain, the walls and the ceiling to the unfortunate Unicorn in the middle of it all like the centrepiece of the world’s sloppiest spider-web.

“Suh-sorry, Sweetie!” Scootaloo chortled, holding a hoof to her muzzle as she tried to stop laughing at her friend. “Guess we kinda went overboard, hey?”

“Just a little.” Sweetie replied tartly, her horn flashing with magic and Scootaloo found herself being picked up and flipped over, before being smushed against Applebloom, the two being pressed muzzle-to-muzzle, belly-to-belly by the Unicorn’s magic. “But I think I heard you say something, Scoot?”

“N-now wait jus’ a minute, we’re sorry, we didn’t mean …” Applebloom stammered, her eyes widening as Sweetie Bell straddled her pinned companions, nudging at the cramped, slick space between their bodies with her own additional armament.

“You two left me out of it again. So I’m going to help Scootaloo out with that little problem of hers, since you two mucked it up.” Scootaloo tried to protest, but between the exhaustion she was feeling, the weight of Sweetie Belle on her back and the now-familiar feeling of a wide-headed prick prodding under her tail, words failed her.

“I believe it was something about ‘plowing’, right Scootaloo?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Rainbow Dash … under any other circumstances, I’d bar you from joining the Wonderbolts permanently for what you did.” Spitfire said with fire in her eyes, glaring at the injured blue Pegasus who squirmed under her gaze. “That said, I’ll only hold back on your entry to our roster for a further six months, since if somebody pulled a stunt like what this … ‘Rarity’ did to me or mine, I’d have aimed for their head, not their guts. Unless the Princess has any input?”

“Uh … isn’t this a Wonderbolts issue?” Twilight asked after a moment of awkward silence, giving Spitfire a shocked look as the brightly-coloured Pegasi perched on the back of the couch, rather than the seat itself, like some sort of bird rather than an equine.

“As a member of the Royalty, you technically can over-ride any command by bureaucrat beneath your rank, although in order of seniority, any of the other Princesses can over-ride your commands in turn. So … anything you’d like to say on behalf of your friend?”

The purple Alicorn looked from the stern-faced leader of the Wonderbolts to her cowering friend and back again, frowning as she thought. Although a part of her did want to jump in and argue in Rainbow’s favour, she also knew that Rainbow’s pride would be never recover, as well as affecting her relationship with the Wonderbolts in general if they thought the brash rainbow-maned Pegasus got her place in their team due to a Royal’s influence and not Rainbow’s own impressive abilities.

“I thank you for the offer, Captain Spitfire, but this is a Wonderbolts issue. And I’ve only been an Alicorn for a few weeks now, so I hardly think I’m in any position to start flinging Royal Decrees left and right without careful study of the situation involved, especially in a situation where one of the parties involved happens to be a close friend of mine.”

Spitfire locked eyes with Twilight, fluffed her wings … and grinned.

“Oh, very well done, Princess Twilight. I’m happy to see you can separate your personal interests from an issue like this. Canterlot Command was a little concerned, especially after what we had to go through with Cadence …”

“If you had read the reports I’ve been sending for the past three years …” Filthy Rich pointed out with a heated tone, giving the Wonderbolt a withering look as he did so. “… You’d know that the Princess, while somewhat unstable under stress, grew up in Canterlot, unlike Cadence who was found in Las Pegasus! And she was hoof-trained by Princess Celestia, no less, so of course she’s not going to make those kinds of mistakes!”

“Easy tiger, we’re all just a little concerned. When the great Rich keeps sending glowing reports, people get antsy. You never write completely-positive reports, yet little miss student shows up and suddenly rainbows are shooting out of your missives every time she or the other Element Bearers get brought up. Command was concerned you weren’t being objective about your mission, especially given how close your cover-life is tied to a friendly relationship with the Apple Clan and your … personal situate-aaack!”

Spitfire was cut short when Soarin leaned over, hooked a hoof underneath her hind-legs and none-too-gently flipped his boss over the back of the couch she had perched on, a sheepish grin on the blue Stallion’s face.

“Okay, moving on before you two turn this library into a war-zone, we’re supposed to be brain-storming which Royal Agents get paired with which Element Bearers, and plausible cover-stories for it all.” Shuddering as Spitfire emerged from the back of the couch, rubbing the crown of her head and glaring at Soarin with an intensity that should have resulted in the Stallion combusting on the spot, the other Wonderbolt in the room pointed at Twilight with a slightly-shaking hoof. “How about you pitch us your ideas first, your majesty, and then we refine it from there? Put that infamous brain to use?”

Infamous? Twilight thought to herself, smiling wryly. The Agents certainly seemed hellbent on getting orders from her … a quick glance to her side showed Luna nodding slowly, and the rest of the non-Agent Ponies in the room seemed more shell-shocked than anything.

It had been a tartarus of a morning, after all …

“Okay, give me a second to think this through …” The purple princess warned, closing her eyes and running scenarios through her head. What most Ponies assumed was that she loved books because she loved learning, but that was only half true. Twilight absorbed knowledge like a plant absorbed sunlight, and while she might enjoy grabbing books on a subject she was researching, it was more to jump-start her memories than any need to read it up in a book, and to hopefully distract somepony else and get them to leave her alone while she accessed the huge amount of knowledge stored in her brain.

To be more accurate, it wasn’t a question of remembering what she’d learned, it was a question of finding that knowledge amongst the mountain of information she had already absorbed. The books simply helped narrow her search parameters down to a level where she could recover the desired information in a reasonable time, and common courtesy dictated that you didn’t disturb somepony who was reading unless it was vitally important, so it reduced the chance she’d be disturbed and have to start over again.

Distances, wind velocity, known threats from the Everfree Forest, the reactions of the Ponyville inhabitants to previous disasters, the average speed of her friends, the state of the local Ponyville roads and more flashed through her mind, giving rise to scenarios that she pricked and prodded and tore apart to make new ones, her eyes flicking left and right across empty air as Twilight’s mind kicked into what Spike affectionately called Super Study form.

For the other Ponies in the room, it was disturbing to say the least to see Twilight go stock-still, but her eyes buzz around in their sockets as if tracking something impossibly small and fast in the air for close to a minute before Twilight stood up abruptly and walked away, heading to the Librarian’s nook near the door, where she quickly assembled some chalk and the portable chalk-board before dragging the whole set over to the group with her magic.

“Oh dear sweet Faust, kill me now, she’s gonna make us flow-charts.” Rainbow whimpered, grabbing a pillow with her remaining fore-hoof and pushing her face into it to scream.

“Cute, Rainbow, but no. Mister Rich has pointed out they don’t have time, and quite frankly, I need to get you all out of here, go get our supplies from the Everfree Forest and then … I am going to crawl into my bed and get some much needed sleep, I have been running on fumes for days now.” Grinning wryly at her friend, Twilight levitated a dozen pieces of coloured chalk into the air and began drawing a rough map of Ponyville onto the blackboard, using chalk that was close to the colouration of her friends to illustrate where their houses were. “Okay, so here’s my idea:”

“First off, we move Rainbow’s mansion over to this space here, where it can be an equal distance from Ponyville, Fluttershy’s cottage and the Apple family’s farm. Rainbow bunks down with Spitfire, which puts two of our fastest Ponies together and in a position where if there is any problem with either the Apples or Fluttershy, they can be there in a minute or two, or if a situation arises where a fight is inevitable, Rainbow can make it to Ponyville and let us know while the Wonderbolt distracts the threat.”

“Next, we have to decide who pairs up with Applejack and Fluttershy. I’d say we keep Soarin at the Apple’s farm for two reasons. The first reason is that puts our fastest fliers with our most distant Element Bearers so if there is trouble the Apples can be protected, but still close enough to support the rest of us if the situation changes, and the second reason is because with Zecora staying over, Fluttershy doesn’t have room for a second guest, and with the plethora of animals who stay at her house, including at least one grizzly bear that I know of. Anypony dumb enough to try a stunt like what Sunset Shimmer did is going to have to get through those first, which gives the rest of us time to converge on Fluttershy’s cottage.”

“Uh … if the boss doesn’t mind, maybe Fluttershy and Applejack could ‘hire’ me to help out around their places? Mend fences, feed the animals, that kind of thing?” Snowflake offered, raising a tiny hoof into the air. “While I’m taking care of business at one Bearer’s place, Soarin could monitor the other from a cloud, which means we’re still providing as much continuous protection as we can without breaking cover?”

“…That works fer us. Ah’ve been lookin’ to hire on some farmhands to help out ‘round Sweet Apple Acres, an’ Bul … eh, Snowflake is known fer bein’ a hard worker.” Applejack gave an appraising look at Snowflake, and then smirked. “’Sides, ah’ve got three miles o’ wire fences that need tightenin’. Would be nice to have some help fer it fer a change.”

“Oh goody.” The oddly-proportioned Pegasus snorted, but he was smiling too. “Assuming you don’t mind, Richie?”

“No, that’s a good plan. If you decide to retire from Princessdom, Twilight, I’m sure you’ve a sterling career as a staff-officer in the Royal Guard. But what about the Ponies closer to town? And what’s the cover-story for the Wonderbolts heading out to stay at the outskirts of Ponyville?” The brown-coated Stallion nodded thoughfully before speaking next. “I’ll see if Time Turner can provide some spare communicator-crystals for Soarin and Spitfire if they’d going to be separated from the rest of the group …”

“Well, about that. We could say we’re on leave for stress, and we decided to crash with our favourite rookie.” The Wonderbolt Captain said, swatting the back of her Co-Captain’s head in revenge for earlier before sitting herself down next to Rainbow Dash and putting a hoof around her shoulders, the blue Pegasus having lowered her pillow to her chest after finishing her faux-horror screaming. “Nothing against Ponyville, but I just can’t sleep on anything but a cloud-bed, and Rainbow’s the only Pony in town with a proper Pegasus house.”

“How about we say you’re on mandated leave for stress, and I’m stepping aside to give the younger Wonderbolts a chance to prove they have what it takes to be the next Captain and Co-Captain?” Soarin added, rubbing the back of his head with a hoof where Spitfire had whacked him. “Faust knows we ruffled enough feathers leaving Whiplash and Tight Clip in charge of the Wonderbolts, but at least they have the authority and the brass to make the rest of the Wonderbolts hoof the line and stay the course until Spitfire or I can return to base.”

“Wait … you left Whiplash and Tight Ship in …” Blinking rapidly, Rainbow Dash sagged against Spitfire in shock, earning a sharp bark of laughter from the other Pegasus. “Yeah, six months more before I have to go back and deal with them sounds just fine. Thanks, Spitfire.”

“Heh, c’mon Rookie, it could have been worse. We could have left Surprise and Fleet Foot in charge of the Wonderbolts instead.”

Rainbow’s response was to just pull the pillow back up to her face and whimper loudly into the soft fabric.

“Okay, that just leaves us with Pinkie and Rarity to protect, and Rarity …” Twilight began.

“Lady Rarity will have a flock of my Thestrals standing watch over her before the day’s end, and until she decides to act her age, not her horse-shoe size, however long that may take.” Luna butted in, frowning heavily as she gave Twilight a loaded look as the other Alicorn spluttered a protest for several moments before eventually bowing her head in defeat. “I know you trust her, Twilight, but considering the words spoken during her spat with the other Bearers, and her previous failures of conscience involving her desire to join the ranks of the Nobility. I believe it best to ensure that Rarity is kept safe, and most importantly, secluded until she either comes to her senses, or realizes that turning on her friends out of misplaced anger and spite will only result in more suffering for all parties involved.”

“Well, that actually works out well for us then, because we have six Royal Agents left and only two Element Bearers.” Filthy Rich said with false cheer in the now very-quiet room, his plastered-on smile fading quickly in the awkward silence. “Ooooooh-kay then…”

“Yes, well, the rest of the plan. Just … if Rarity is going to have a unit of the Night Guard watching over her, then we can have Derpy flying back and forth between the more distant members of our group for physical message relays, and that leaves Time Turner, Octavia and Vinyl Scratch to look after Pinkie Pie.”

“Oh, terrific, throw me to the Timber Wolves, why don’t you …” Octavia muttered, sprawling back against her couch with an expression of extreme disgust on her face. “What about you, Princess Twilight, or do you feel you don’t need the protection of the Royal Agents?”

“Well, Luna and I will be sticking close to each other for … for at least a year, assuming all goes well, so while it would be great to have a Royal Agent or two around, consider that we’re more likely to be threatened by a subtle enemy, rather than somepony or something trying to magically outmuscle us like Sunset did. Having somepony watching our backs is probably going to be more useful than an actual bodyguard at this point in time.” Twilight countered, tilting her head at the other Pony, who groaned, rolled her eyes and unfortunately met the gaze of the only happy pony in the room by this stage.

“You mean I get three more friends?” Pinkie squeed, pressing both fore-hooves to her cheeks to try and contain a grin that threatened to split her face.

Octavia groaned even louder, closed her eyes and crossed her hooves across her chest in disgust.

“Don’t mind Octavia, Princesses, she doesn’t like anypony. Courtesy of the large, gnarly stick up her ass that, six years later, I’m still unable to pull out of her plot.” Vinyl chuckled at Twilight’s concerned expression and Luna’s stormy one. “That said, with Octy on the job, Pinkie’s safe as houses. Nopony gets the drop on one of Octavia’s marks, not now not ever.”

“Agreed. While Agent Octavia’s attitude might be … less than pleasant, her abilities more than make up for the lack. With Octavia and Time Turner running interference throughout the town, and Vinyl working with Pinkie Pie in her party-business, I think that neatly ties up most loose ends we’ll face in the short-term.”

“Anypony else have anything to add?”

Ponies hemmed and hawed, coughed or shook their heads, but after a few more minutes, and Twilight noted with some amusement, a distinct effort to clear the trays of every last scrap of her zap-apple jam-tarts, the majority of the assembled Ponies got up and began making their way out and back into Ponyville, with the Royal Agents scattering back to their jobs to maintain their cover, and Big Mac, Fluttershy, Zecora and Granny Smith being led to the Ponyville Hospital by a all-but-vibrating Pinkie.

Which left Twilight and Luna with the two Wonderbolts, Applejack and Rainbow Dash still sitting in the library.

“Uh … Applejack? Not that I don’t mind having you here, but …”

“Sorry, Sugarcube, jus’ wanted to know ‘bout how we’re gonna fix Applebloom and the other Crusaders.” The orange-coated Farm-Mare asked softly, scrunching up her already-abused hat between her forehooves as she spoke. “Kinda scared spitless ‘bout what they might have done to themselves last night with that stupid Spell-Scroll.”

“I’m … more concerned they managed to get that padlock off the chest. That thing was made from Minotorium steel and built by Gryphon locksmiths, who are infamous for their ability to make pick-proof locks. The damn thing was part of a set that was given to me by Princess Celestia herself to help secure some of my more sensitive research materials, and I enchanted all of those padlocks with a variety of spells, spells of protection and alarm that should have been heard, if not seen, all the way from Canterlot if triggered by somebody forcing the lock open.” Twilight offered, reaching out to touch hooves with Applejack, who did so with a haunted expression on her face. “How in Faust’s name those three got it off the chest without triggering any of the alarm-spells or damaging the chest itself is one of the first things I am going to be asking.”

“That said, do you really want to be in the room when I ask what spells they used on each other while in the middle of a false estrus?”

Applejack blanched and shook her head so fast Twilight was surprised the poor pony didn’t suffer from vertigo.

“Okay, so, I will get the information out of them, come up with a plan, and then get back to you with the … sanitized version of events. We’ll figure out what to do with them next when we get that far.” Turning to the Wonderbolts, Twilight raised an eyebrow as she caught Soarin staring at Applejack again. There is something I need to ask Soarin about … in private. And when my brain isn’t running on fumes. “Okay, so, assuming you two have no issue with the plan …”

“None at all, your Majesty.” Soarin said with a smile, saluting smartly, while Spitfire gave a lazy one. “But, uh, would it be acceptable for us to borrow some of your Dragon’s Fire to send a message to Cloudsdale? We … kind of left in a hurry when Canterlot Command gave us the order, so we do need some of our team-mates back at base to send us our gear, or we’re literally stuck in Ponyville with just our flight-suits.”

“And trust us, these things are not built for pockets.” Spitfire added, chuckling as she ran a hoof down the side of her sleek, body-hugging uniform. “We don’t have a bit to share between us right now, unless I get Soarin to start dancing around some poles for the Mares.”

“Fair enough, and that’s a mental image that’s going to plague me for days, thanks for that.” Twilight groaned and put her face into her hooves, commencing the now-familiar breathing exercises for a few moments before speaking again. “I’m going to go and check on the girls really quickly, ask Spike to bottle me some of his fire, and then we’ll help you move Rainbow’s house … and then Luna and I have to go and recover a priceless artifact from under a rock.”

“Honestly, Twilight, it is my circle of enchanted shadow and spider-webs, I can leave it where I want.” Luna huffed, but still smiled as she gave the frazzled purple princess a poke with one of the Thestral’s wings. “And it has been an age since I tried my hooves at moving clouds. This will be fun.”

Twilight took one look at the room, her eyes sweeping across the pale and nervous-looking Applejack, the shellshocked and three-legged Rainbow Dash, the smug Spitfire, Soarin who apparently couldn’t keep his eyes off Applejack, and the looming, smirking Luna at her side.

“Fun. Yee-haaaaw. And when we’re done, I’m making a detour to Berry Punch’s place, buying something strong, slapping a horn-muffler on myself and locking down the Library until at least mid-day tomorrow.”

Chapter 53

CHAPTER 53

Celestia had called for a short recess after the first three hours of answering her little Ponies’ questions, needing to wet her throat and take a breather, but in truth the Princess felt like she could go on forever. Dawn Ray, a life-long member of the Royal Guard and a Pony whose discretion and softly-spoken friendship had long been of great comfort to Princess Celestia, had come to provide her with refreshment, with the bulk of the Royal Guards in the castle-proper buzzing around like angry bees with a plethora of desperate reporters trying their luck for an exclusive interview, let alone the security nightmare of so many Ponies cramming their way into the castle to get out of the growing heat of the day.

Her Ponies were listening. Chrysalis’s surrender, the threat of a potential threat across the Badlands, the capture and successful incarceration of a Demon and the promise that Equestria would help the other nations of the world prepare countermeasures against future demonic threats, all of it gave the Ponies something to pin their hopes on.

True, tomorrow the media would no doubt try to spin it this way and that, the usual suspects would try to pin all the blame on Celestia and her constant reforms and changes to the ‘old ways’ yet again, but today, her Ponies listened to her for a change. Today, they could feel safe again, trust that everything could be made alright, that their faith in the Crown was justified.

It had felt like an age since she had last enjoyed that feeling. Between the Shadow Council, and the various other antagonist groups she allowed to spring up within Equestria over the past thousand years, it had been far too long since Celestia felt like she had won anything. Groups like the Shadow Council would be allowed to flourish for a few generations, to bring together like-minded individuals as much to allow Celestia to keep an eye on those who would try to undermine her message of Harmony as to cultivate groups that would be willing to stand against her and call her out if she made decisions that negatively affected her little Ponies.

“Princess?” Dawn Ray asked softly, the old veteran giving her an appraising look as Celestia poured herself another long glass of iced water and downed it slowly to soothe her taxed throat. “Are you sure we should allow the Royal Interview to continue? I mean, that is a lot of Ponies out there, and we weren’t able to set up the standard protective barriers. Captain Rosebush is probably going to have conniptions if she hears you’re allowing yourself to be exposed without the usual security measures in place …”

“I am wearing a significant amount of my Regalia, dear Ray. Unless a cabal of Sorcerers has managed to sneak into the castle grounds and is preparing a multi-tiered spell-circle attuned to the forces of entropy and negative energy out in broad daylight, and we somehow miss a ritual that should immediately start to cause unnatural phenomena, I should be fine.” Princess Celestia smiled and levitated another glass off the serving table, filling it and offering it to the aging Guard, who bowed his head slightly in thanks and took the vessel with a hoof. “I am more concerned about the Ponies who would be caught in the backwash of the attack than any concern for my own safety. I am an Immortal after all. The succor of Death is, sadly, a luxury I am denied.”

“Be that as it may, Princess, consider the blow to morale Equestria would suffer if all your grand talk out there on the balcony came undone because of one surly Pony with a heavy crossbow and a bolt enchanted with death-magic? It might just be a nuisance to you, but it would completely destroy your credibility after what you’ve said today if an assassin was able to make an attempt in-front of so many witnesses.”

Celestia poured herself another glass and drank half of it before fixing Dawn Ray with a weary look as she felt her good cheer starting to disappear into the usual hole in her guts.

“…How many did we catch this time?”

“The first group was composed of five crossbow-wielders with a pair of necromantic bolts each, all Pegasi and all belonging to different mercenary companies. The five of them slipped into the castle while disguised as cloud-maintenance workers to help position the clouds some of the reporters are sitting on and were hiding on, or in one case, inside the clouds with some of the most powerful repeating crossbows we’ve seen to date, Minotaur work, of course, but adapted for use by beings with hooves rather than fingers.”

“We’re still trying to isolate exactly who gave the order to allow our air-space security to be violated like that and if there are any further snipers in the crowd, but I’m willing to bet a week’s wages the orders were forged. Captain Rosebush is going to have kittens when she hears that somepony has managed to forge both her signature and her Captain’s seal.” The aging guard trotted to the doorway, peered back and forth down the hallway before trotting back to Celestia’s side and gave his monarch a much-needed back-rub. “Additionally, six students from the School for Gifted Unicorns are being kept for questioning when we found and confiscated contraband wands and spell-scrolls containing combat magic and one manifesto that advocates a return to Unicorn leadership over the ‘lesser tribes’ and the deaths of the ‘mongrel’ Princesses. The Magi have identified the scrolls as containing enchantments to conjure clouds of acid and flame ... blasted Tribalists.”

“And finally, eight Earth Ponies, all employees of a shipping company we’ve tentatively identified as a shell-corporation that is, through about seven different owners, property of the Muckrakers, armed with crossbows of Gryphon make this time, and quarrels fitted with alchemical explosives packed with shards of ceramic material that we believe have been soaked in poison. Again, nothing that could kill you, your majesty, but they could have inflicted considerable harm on the crowd and it would have taken days just to remove the poisoned shards from your body, let alone the unfortunates caught in the explosions. And just as alarming, both pegasi and Earth Ponies swear they were contracted by a ‘middle pony’ …”

“… dressed all in white with a large, high-pointed hat, so they could not make out what Tribe the Pony belonged to, or even their age or gender.” Celestia gave a loud groan of annoyance and put down her glass with a loud thump. “A match, no doubt, for our mysterious individual who also attempted to have Twilight’s father kidnapped by yet another group of mercenaries?”

“Some details are different, the meeting places mostly and the type of rewards offered, but yes. Unfortunately, the outfit this ‘Middle-Pony’ uses makes identifying them all but impossible. We could be dealing with a Pony from any of the four Tribes, we have no idea what gender the individual is or any other distinguishing features … for all we know, it could even be a Donkey or Gryphon posing as a Pony, given that they share a roughly similar shape to our own. I would heartily recommend we take our victories, such as they are, and declare the Royal Interview over for now. We’re severely understaffed, and having our forces stretched between the border we share with Gryphonia and then the entire Third Circle being sent to escort the Changeling Queen, I’ve no doubt we will need to review our entire defense strategy for Canterlot Castle and replace our entire spell-network just to ensure we haven’t been critically compromised.”

Celestia indulged in a most Un-Princessly groan, and welcomed a second back-rub from the veteran Royal Guard and long-time confidant. Perfect, just Faust-flipping perfect. The Powers as my witness, when we find this middle-pony, and can finally throw Bluebone and his cronies into Horseshoe Bay, that law preventing me from going down to the city and going bar-crawling is being repealed and Discord and I are going to drink until we drop. And given I’m an Immortal and he’s a Demi-God …

Perhaps just a quiet celebration at the Apple’s farm instead. Less chance of accidentally causing the apocalypse due to being blindly drunk with an equally-inebriated Chaos God egging her on that way.

“…No. I know that Captain Rosebush is currently stuck dealing with reorganizing the legal department right now to focus on the Changeling Trial, but right now we cannot allow our momentum to falter now. I will continue the Royal Interview, but we will narrow down the amount of Ponies who may be present and have the Royal Interview held someplace smaller, a place where the Royal Guards can keep a closer watch over the Ponies I am speaking to. Two reporters per paper, radio-station or news-station only. That should improve our chances of catching any further assassins and minimize the amount of Ponies at risk should we miss one.” The Solar Monarch gave herself a quick shake of her head in annoyance. A part of her had revelled in speaking to her Ponies en-mass, and their absolute focus on her as she told them everything was going to be alright had been soothing after centuries of dealing with the selfish, fractious Nobles and stubborn, close-minded splinter-groups that popped up every other decade.

Their efforts were a constant hindrance to her dream of uniting the continent under the banner of harmony, where all nations and races were considered of equal importance, regardless of wealth, position, gender or religion, but Celestia had lived through what happened when a leader ruled unopposed, even with the best of intentions. However petty and spiteful and toxic groups like the Shadow Council were, their very existence helped keep her on the straight and narrow path to her goal.

“…Off the top of my head, that makes about two hundred plus Ponies … I’d say the Hall of Blue Song. It’s small enough you won’t need to rip your throat up to make yourself heard but large enough it could hold around that many bodies at once, there’s only two entrances for anypony to use, and a balcony running along the upper walls where the Royal Guard and Magi can position themselves to keep watch over the Ponies.”

“Make it so, Dawn Ray, but give me ten more minutes before we let Ponies start entering the Hall. I will cast as many enchantments as I can to protect everypony from acts of malice … and then, if Faust is on our side, we can wrap this up safely and prepare for tomorrow’s backlash.”

“Aye, your Majesty.”

“And see if the kitchens can whip up some ‘hard day’ dishes to be sent to my quarters for the noonday meal. I am going to need it.”

“Only if the Royal Guards can have some too.”

“You do realize only my armor is enchanted to resize if I gain a few pounds, Dawn Ray? But of course you may ask the kitchens to do so, old friend. I dare say, we’ve all earned the right for some comfort food today.”

“As ever, your generosity and largess knows no bounds … your largeness.”

Celestia responded with a snort of laughter, and throwing a pillow at Dawn Ray’s rapidly retreating backside to the jab towards her infamous large flank. But she did feel a little better, and though a part of her quailed at the thought, she realized that ever since she and Discord had begun their affair, her attitude around her trusted confidants had become rather more informal. She found herself being openly friendly with them, not merely the ever-calm and understanding monarch but finally herself, and some like Dawn Ray reciprocated in kind, a treasure that Celestia had long since resigned herself to never experiencing again.

Still, she had only minutes to layer a slew of protective enchantments over the hall, and once alerted to the change in venues, the mob of slavering reporters in her courtyard would move heaven and earth to get themselves into her Castle. If there truly were more assassins amongst them, as Dawn Ray feared, then Celestia had to make sure her work was impeccable.

A Princess could not settle for anything less than perfect when it came to the lives and safety of her subjects, after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was strange, Night Light thought to himself, to find the house suddenly lonely now that the bulk of his ‘house guests’ had vacated the premises to recover the necessities for their long-term stay under his roof, with proper escort from the Royal Guard this time. The first order of business would likely be the supplies needed to sound-proof the house so they wouldn’t all drive each other crazy.

Well, crazier than they all were. He was willingly married to Twilight Velvet, after all, and Spud was willingly married to three very different Mares.

Not that the relative silence was unwelcome. Spud’s wives had commandeered the bulk of the ‘house guests’ with military training to serve as additional guards and bullied, cajoled and sweet-talked the rest into being their packmules, which left Night Light alone in his house with his wife … and Thunderwing.

With the latter desperately trying to escape the former, who was having none of it and had tied herself in literal knots around the latter that made Night Light very grateful to be a Stallion as he watched the two Mares squirm around on his livingroom carpet like a pair of duelling snakes.

“Velvet, please! I am the Commander of the Night Guard, I can’t do this! I have responsibilities, duties ... dignity!”

“You’re a Mare, first and foremost, and I am not letting you go until you agree to this!”

“We’re far too old to be pulling this crap now! Night Light, help!”

“I’ve no problem with making it official.” Night Light said calmly, raising an eyebrow as Velvet gaped and Thunderwing simultaneously scowled and blushed. “I was not lying when I said I wanted us to be a Herd back then, and I’ve no issue with us creating one now.”

Twilight Velvet let out a squeal that was entirely unbefitting a Mare with two full-grown children of her own, and Thunderwing’s struggle to escape Velvet’s grip apparently turned into an attempt to crawl closer to Night Light to throttle him, judging from the half-muffled words coming out of the Thestral’s mouth as Velvet’s fore-hoof accidentally pressed across Thunderwing’s throat.

“That said, dear, please let Thunderwing go before she passes out. Once Spud and the rest come back with the supplies, we’re going to be busy remodelling the house for all our guests, so perhaps it would be best if you and Thunderwing took the ladies out someplace safe while we get started, with another troop of guards watching over you all, of course. It’s going to get noisy, and we’re going to be busy remodelling the spare rooms on the second storey into actual bedrooms.”

“Oh, think the Mares can’t handle some home improvement?” Velvet asked tartly as she uncoiled herself from Thunderwing, who took the opportunity to crawl away, apparently not trusting her legs to carry her to safety after getting grappled by Night Light’s wife again.

“No, but I assume you’d rather pick the new wallpaper rather than leave it in the hooves of somepony else, and as much as I love my friends like the brothers I never had, do you really want all those Stallions picking the furniture and décor for our house, let alone their wives?”

Twilight Velvet went still, her eyes narrowing as she glared up at the ceiling, no doubt imagining the state of her house with half a dozen couples and one Herd all trying to put their own personal ‘take’ on her rooms.

“So, you can pick whose tastes you trust to come out with you, and those who you don’t can stay here and help us prepare the sound-proofing panels and renovate the upstairs bathroom … or you can let everypony redecorate their rooms as they see fit. And we could be in this situation for mon-.”

“Dear.” The word came out with a considerable amount of irritation behind it. “I get it, so please, stop. I’ll take a handful of Ponies out after lunch to pick the wallpaper and new furnishings, while you and Spud keep the rest of our new … house-guests … from demolishing our home.”

“Will do, love. Thunderwing, you okay over there?” The ex-Ranger sighed and turned his gaze to the formidable Commander of the Night Guard … who was currently struggling to pull herself up onto the couch with her front legs and wings, as everything south of her navel apparently as useful as wet noodles.

“When I get feeling back in my back legs, Night Light, I am going to choke the life from you …” Thunderwing snarled, awkwardly pulling herself into a sitting position and massaging her thighs with her fore-hooves, shooting a dark look towards Twilight Velvet, who was apparently lost in thought as she wandered off towards the stairs, probably imagining what she wanted the renovations to look like. “I forget that Velvet practices martial arts…”

“She’s the kind of mare who can tuck both back legs behind her ears at forty years of age …” Night Light teased, his muzzle splitting into a grin as Thunderwing flushed and flung a throw-pillow at his head. “Tai Chi is the least of Velvet’s many and strange talents, as you should well remember. Mare knows every pressure-point and nerve cluster on the Pony body …”

“Oh, I remember a lot of things, Night Light. Like when you had an afro and bell-bottom pants were the height of fashion, you came up to us in the disco and tried to ask us to dance … except the music was so loud, we couldn’t tell which one of us you were trying to ask!” The Thestral sighed and went back to attempting to massage feeling back into her hind-legs. “It was … the happiest time of my life, Night Light. My best friend, a sweet, dorky stallion and I all as part of one happy little group. The Colony and my duties were so far away, Velvet was refusing to conform to the Nobles’ attitudes towards us ‘commoners’ and you were …”

“…A magic drop-out who joined the Royal Guard while stoned out of his gourd and still somehow managed to ace the tests.” Night Light finished, chuckling softly along with Thunderwing as they recalled the misadventures of their wild youth.

It was … nice. To have Twilight Velvet puttering around in the background, and Thunderwing chatting with him again, the back-and-forth teasing, the shared delight in star-gazing … it seemed only a few minutes has passed when he found himself on the couch, massaging Thunderwing’s hind-legs as the Mare groaned in approval as the tingling in her limbs signalled the return of sensation.

I didn’t lie … Night Light thought to himself with more than a little surprise as he seated himself next to Thunderwing, and the scarred Thestral didn’t pull away this time. We’ve taken the long way to this point, but I know I wouldn’t object to forming a Herd with Thunderwing and Night Light. I … I truly hope that Shining and Twilight don’t object, but I really do want to properly court Thunderwing again and finally have our Herd together once again.

First things first, however … “Now, while Velvet is distracted by something other than making up for lost time with you, however enjoyable it is to watch … Bluebone and our mysterious mercenaries. Any word from the Castle?”

“We’ve only the names of the mercenaries. Penny, Pound, Dime, Nickle, Pence and Guinea, all belonging to an all-Unicorn mercenary group called the Spiral Pikes that only recently returned to Equestria after a long campaign fighting for a string of Zebra warlords way down south, and more disturbingly, only after a number of individuals in Canterlot were bought out or agreed to out-of-court settlements for a variety of crimes that would make both our manes go gray-er.” The scarred Thestral sighed, leaning her head on Night Light’s shoulder, her tone somber. “An all-Unicorn mercenary group … and guess who was their primary patron before they decided to leave Equestria for places more accepting of magical carnage?”

“Oh Faust, Bluebone?”

“No, Countess Krystaline, but you were close. We’ve tracked them receiving sums of money, resources and even political favours from some very politically-connected Ponies, including the Amber Swirls, the Twinkleshines and just because we needed another reason to mistrust these bastards, Countess Krystaline regularly used these bastards as hirelings during several events that saw a number of Ponies either bruised or traumatized, and they’ve a track-record of hiring on for dodgy employers longer than my tail. At least five of their last employers before they skipped Equestria to avoid some very disturbing charges are known members of the Shadow Court.

“Charges for …”

“You name it, they’ve done it, but the worst included hate-crimes against Earth Ponies in Canterlot and the surrounding regions, arson of businesses and homes of Ponies we know offended members of the Shadow Court, likely refusing to sell-out to the Nobility or something similar. Rosebush is convinced that at least some of the mercenary band are responsible for sexual assaults against nearly a two-score Mares before the entire band skipped the country. Unfortunately, the victims were too traumatized to be able to provide proper identification, but the fact the Mares were all cursed to ‘scramble’ most paternity spells we have access to so we could identify their assailants from residue left behind after the attacks points to a fairly powerful Unicorn being involved.”

“And being an ex-Royal Guard, Night Light, you’d well know that the kind of spells capable of that kind of obfuscation are extremely rare and more often than not kept under heavy guard and taught only to specific Magi of the Fourth Circle purely so the Magi can keep our counter-curses and anti-hex wards up-to-date and functional. Add to that the fact that the Spiral Pikes specifically advertise their ability to curse and hex their opponents into defeat and they have a history of abusing non-Unicorns with magic, and we have a very nasty problem on our hooves.” The Thestral’s scarred muzzle split into a thin, vicious grin however, exposing the large, sharp canine teeth that had made Night Light’s ancestors’ once fear the bat-ponies as blood-suckers. “Thankfully, after nearly getting snuffed by a curse from their own people, Guinea, the leader of the group we’ve got our hooves on, spilled the beans very damn quickly in exchange for being put somewhere safe from all forms of magic …”

“Yes, I remember. Stop jerking my reins here, Thunder, you know damn well I remember why I was evicted from the Cell of Ultimate Confinement.”

“Hmph. Well, to cut a long story short, Guinea let us know it’s something of an initiation rite amongst the Spiral Pikes. When you advance up the ranks to that of their ‘Captain’, you have to prove you'll do anything for the Spiral Pikes, and I do mean anything …”

“Oh sweet Faust, you mean they hunt down Earth Pony or Pegasi Mares and rape them? To advance up the ranks?”

“Apparently so, according to Guinea at least. I will say that three of the group had to be immediately restrained from attacking their fellows upon hearing this, cousins I believe who are called Penny, Pound and Pence. Apparently the rank-and-file aren’t told about this little ritual until the senior officers think they’re ready.”

“So murder, arson, kidnapping and racially-motivated thuggery are acceptable to these louts, but rape is a step too far? Evil has standards, is that it?” Night Light snorted in contempt, but his features remained set in an expression of sick understanding. “It does makes a loathsome sort of sense, however. They have such a terrible crime hanging over their heads, and if they leave or betray the mercenary band, the evidence gets leaked and if the bastard is lucky, the Royal Guards get to them before the outraged mob does. But to actually do that …”

“It gets worse, if that’s even possible. Most of the officers in the Spiral Pikes, including their leader, are Mares. According to Guinea, they’re the ones who started the rite when they took over after the old Colonel who was leading the band got killed during a freak accident in a training exercise … an accident that also involved the current leaders of the Spiral Pikes. We would have gotten more information out of Guinea, but apparently the idiot swore a blood-oath to keep the secrets of the Spiral Pikes and somehow forgot about it. As soon as he tried to tell us more, blood started to pour out of every orifice he had and the bastard went into convulsions that nearly snapped every bone in his body. We’re lucky the restorative-wards in the Cell kicked in and were able to out-heal the damage the blood-oath inflicted on Guinea, or we’d have a dead witness on our hooves and five more that are too terrified to testify in-case the same happened to them.”

Thunderwing lifted her head off Night Light’s shoulder, patting the Stallion’s shoulder in understanding as the greying ex-ranger reached for the pitcher of water on the table and took a long draught, spurning the cups in favour of trying to force the bile he felt welling up in his throat back down into his guts.

“If my contacts are correct and they usually are ...” The scarred Thestral said softly as Night Light gave her a haunted look. “The evidence all points to a horrible truth: The Spiral Pikes are led by a coven of Witches, Blood-Witches at that, and the Shadow Council are likely fully aware of this and expended a small fortune in bits and political favours to allow the entire mercenary band, a full five thousand Unicorn tribalists led by practitioners of a form of magic that is almost universally banned in every country on the continent, to re-enter the capital city and then disappear into thin air, as far as the Guards assigned to track down the rest of the mercenary company are concerned. And the Witches are dedicated enough to the task they’ve been hired to do that they’d risk hexing one of their own to death rather than allow them to spill the beans to us.”

“You want us to just lay low and quiet. But Thunder, that could take months, if not longer …”

“We may have to accept that the Shadow Council has stolen a march on us all, Night. That our only real option is to hunker down in your house like rabbits waiting out the winter snows, until Princess Celestia can flex some of those divine muscles of hers and burn these monsters out of our city.”

“It’s all well and good to try and push for a resolution, darling.” Twilight Velvet pointed out softly, causing both Thunderwing and Night Light to jump in their seats, falling against each other as they gave matching guilty looks to the other Mare who had returned to the room with a pot of coffee. “But right now, if what I just overheard was correct, can we really risk overextending ourselves? With all the wives and partners at risk if you fail, especially since we’re all stuck here while the Shadow Court is prowling around?”

“You promised when you came home from the Border that you’d never run off to battle again and leave me wondering if I’d be a widow. Trust in the Princess to do the right thing, and protect your family, not your country, just this once.”

Night looked from Velvet to Thunderwing, his face twisting into an agonized frown before he threw himself up off the couch and stalked out of the room. Thunderwing got up to follow, but found herself checked when Twilight Velvet put a hoof to the Thestral’s chest.

“Leave him be, Wingy. I just poked an old wound to remind Night that he’s not some young Stallion who can go galavanting off whenever Bluebone and his cronies pop up, he’ll be a right pain to deal with for a short while till his common sense beats his pride back down.”

“You … really made him promise to leave the army?” Thunderwing asked in a very soft voice as the two Mares sat down on the couch, Velvet’s face splitting into a wry smile before she answered.

“I did … but I kind of had help. Shining had just started to become interested in what his father did for a living, and like all young children, he just blurted the first thing that came to mind, without any concern for what it might mean to the adults around him.” Velvet explained as she poured coffee for them both, her eyes focusing on a distant point on the wall as she spoke, the smile returning in force as she spoke. “He said, and I quote, ‘I’m going to be a soldier like dad, kill all the bad guys, and come home to get a medal from the Princess.’. Night Light turned whiter than Celestia herself, because you know Bluebone’s men were infamous for their tendency to inflict friendly fire on the common-born units back then, and when I started badgering him about not leaving me a war-widow, he actually gave his word that the next tour of duty would be his last. I guess he was also dreading trying to explain to a three-year-old colt who idolized him that every time he left home, there was a very good chance he’d never return.”

“Shining said that?” The aging, scarred Thestral muttered, taking up her cup and blowing on the hot, black liquid, eyes narrowing as she thought back to when a certain white-coated snot-nosed Unicorn first joined the Castle’s Royal Guards and had, in a chance, private meeting in one of the Castle’s many twisting stair-cases, called her ‘aunty’ Thunderwing, and earned a black eye for his audacity. And though she never actually said it, for hurting Thunderwing with old memories that Shining probably had no idea he was stirring up.

“Night did make it home after the next tour, naturally, and finally mustered up the courage to sit Shining down and explain to him what it really meant to be a soldier. I think that hurt Night more than anything, having to break the pretty little illusion Shining had built up around his father during his tours at the Border.”

“… Being a parent sounds difficult.”

“Very. Every action you take, every word, every time you pay attention, or worse still, when you don’t, the children notice and shape themselves to fit in with what they see before them. I constantly worried that Twilight was becoming an introvert because of me and my job, and I know Night nearly tore out his mane from worry when Shining joined the Royal Guard, fearing that our boy might end up in Bluebone’s sights …” Velvet shifted herself closer to Thunderwing on the couch and took a sip of her own coffee, smiling sadly. “Not that I really got to do much parenting with Twilight, what with Princess Celestia keeping my little girl at her side for years at a time, but when she came home she was a very independent child, always trying to do everything herself. Did you know that by the time she turned seven, she was all but autonomous? It took our other … child … to make her start to rely on other Ponies, and even then it was a battle to make my little Twiley remember she didn’t have to do everything alone or with her nose in a book.”

“The Dragon, Spike? I admit, trying to raise such a creature on her own …”

“No, Wingy, though Spike did help Twilight remember that she was allowed to lean on her family for help. No, although we tried, we weren’t able to adopt him because of interference from the Nobility, and he ended up becoming a ward of the state … in a very spectacular fashion, but still a ward of the state.” Velvet’s smile shrank as her eyes trailed over to the far wall, where pictures of her family hung, and a very particular picture, very small and almost lost amongst the larger frames of pictures, diplomas and medals. “When he left us, Twilight … my little girl fell into herself and tried to shut everyone out again, a defence mechanism against being hurt. A trait she shares with her father, sadly.”

“So for now, we’ll let Night Light work his way through this, at least until everypony comes home, and then you’re coming with me on a shopping trip, Wingy!”

“…Why?”

“Because if you really are going to finally form a Herd with Night and myself, I want to make absolutely sure our renovations meet your approval as much as mine!”

“…”

“And just so you know, I can cast a bondage spell faster than you can fly away.”

“I think you meant ‘binding’ spell, Velvet.”

“Oh my dear sweet Wingy … you know I meant exactly what I said.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight knew the theory behind cloud-manipulation quite well, having studied it years ago to help cast the cloud-walking spell for her friends during that il-fated Wonderbolts show in Cloudsdale, but she hadn’t expected it to have so many problems when attempting to move such a large and complex structure as Rainbow’s cloud mansion.

Certainly it was a relatively simple matter for Twilight to, with some coaching from Luna and Soarin, extend her considerable, if still somewhat drained, magical powers through internal channels that her transformation from Unicorn to Alicorn had imbued into her body and into the cloud-mansion itself, literally holding everything from bookshelves to window-sills together as the three Pegasi and two Alicorns pushed Rainbow’s house into position, but the micro-management she had to use to keep her part of the house intact and connected to the parts Luna and Soaring were moving was staggering, yet they made it look so easy.

And yet once she stopped thinking about the mechanics and just decided to do, the process was frighteningly simple to learn, even as a small corner of Twilight’s mind marvelled over how easily a Pegasi could move water around at-will with their hooves and even actively manipulate air-streams with quasi-tangible magical fields generated from their wings. It also made her wonder just what her Alicorn magic, manipulated through her Earth Pony ‘channels’, could accomplish …

And if Luna was correct, Twilight had always had Earth Pony channels, being a hybrid of Earth Pony and Unicorn. Which could mean she had been using Earth Pony ‘magic’ subconsciously to keep up with the extremely-fit and physically active Ponies around her.

Had she privacy, and no other concerns, Twilight would have quite happily ensconced herself in the library for a week just testing her budding theories. Sadly, such happy day-dreaming would have to wait …

How they would keep the house in place once it was in position was something that Soarin seemed loathe to actually explain, but the swarm of a hundred camera-wielding Pegasi, and easily twice as many Unicorn and Earth Pony paparazzi taking to the air with hot-air balloons and dirigibles prevented her from actively grilling the Wonderbolt on why he was suddenly so reluctant to train her on how to ‘be’ a Pegasus.

“By Faust’s right plot-cheek, when Command said you two were getting swarmed by the media, they weren’t kidding.” Soarin muttered as the mansion slowly sailed through the air, Soarin providing advice and minute changes in direction as Rainbow flew around the front of the mansion to ensure nothing got caught up in its path … and to swoop pesky Ponies who sought to trespass into her house while it was on the move to get closer to the Princesses at the back of the mansion, and Spitfire flew escort at the back, relying on her infamous reputation as the dare-devil commander of the Wonderbolts to keep similarly-tenacious reporters and paparazzi from mobbing the Princesses.

“You think this is bad, you should have been at the press conference …” Twilight muttered back, straining for a second to keep the north wall of the mansion in its place as a pack of Pegasi swooped in to try and get close enough for an interview only for Spitfire to fly right through their group and send them spiralling downwards in tailspins before they flattened out and, appropriately cowed, joined the rest of the mob, the collective tail-wind of their passing threatening to tear the compressed cloud-matter apart into vapour.

“Really? I know we’ve got quite the posse after us now, but the newspaper articles were rather tame, considering the Big Three seemed afraid to print more than a few sentences on the matter.” The Wonderbolt replied, giving Twilight a confused look. “Normally anything involving the Princesses or the Element of Magic gets at least the first-page treatment, yet all we got was ‘Princess Twilight saves town with basement dungeon, Princess Celestia to blame for continent-wide blindness from reckless spell-casting?’, which for a medium dominated by idiots like Stump, Murdock and the Muckrakers, is almost approving of our monarchs.”

“Twilight explained the dangers of teleportation to the reporters when one fool tried to pin the blame for the whole incident on Twilight not teleporting Sunset out of town, and the entire group ended up losing their breakfasts or fainting dead away in their seats.” Luna explained, chortling to herself as Twilight blew a raspberry in her direction. “I suspect we’ll have a considerable decrease in the number of would-be applicants for the teleportation license after that. I think the next time we have a hostile press-conference, I’ll just have my sister wheel you out first and terrifying all but the boldest of reporters into fleeing the castle, Twilight.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” The purple princess muttered, though a smile did crease her face briefly at the thought. “Still, we’re going to have a hard time escaping the media frenzy behind us when we head into the Everfree Forest to pick up our tent and other supplies.”

“Errr … begging your pardon, Princess Twilight, but that is the Everfree Forest. I don’t think even Stump’s bits would convince a Pony to fly over that place just to get an exclusive interview with Royalty.” Twilight found herself looking at the Wonderbolt as if he’d grown a second head once she recognized the fear in the Pony’s voice. “To you, it might just be your backyard, but to most Ponies, that’s one of the most dangerous places on the continent.”

“Huh. You know, with all the times we’ve been through the forest, I kind of forget … well, I mean I know it is dangerous in there, but …” Twilight stammered, blushing at Soarin’s comment. It wasn’t that she didn’t recognize that the forest was dangerous, it was just … familiar now. Between helping Fluttershy with her animals, and assisting Zecora with her hunts for rare herbs or exotic minerals, or just following the yelling until she found which sap-covered tree the Cutiemark Crusaders had gotten stuck to this time, Twilight felt like her hooves had trodden every hidden path and ruin in the Everfree Forest by now.

“It may be a blessing in disguise, Twilight. If the Everfree truly holds such terror to the average Pony, our flying into the forest without concern will help cement not only your bravery, but also make others wonder just how strong you are that the thought of walking amongst Manticores, Hydras and Timber Wolves does not even concern you.” Luna pointed out, still grinning as her silver-shod hooves pressed hard against the cloud-mansion to maintain her portion of the structure’s integrity. “There’s nothing wrong with allowing a little mystery and glamor to build up behind you name, especially this early in your career as a Princess when every pony and their mother is pushing to see how far your authority actually reaches, but we’ll probably have to step in when the cults start to pop up.”

“… You do realize that is … no, you know what, nevermind. Maybe a bit of embellishment that is positive towards us could be just what the doctor ordered. Faust knows, we could do with something going our way for once.”

The rest of the trip passed almost peacefully, with the only words spoken between Soarin, Luna and herself just cautions about errant gusts of wind or commentary on the increasingly irate Spitfire’s attempts to ward off the paparazzi following them. When the cloud-mansion finally reached the air-space that was roughly an equal distance from Ponyville, Fluttershy’s cottage and the Apple family farm, Twilight found herself gently told to ‘buzz off’ by Rainbow, who was circling the mansion, eyes narrowing as she inspected the house for dissipating clouds or other forms of damage.

It was surprising to Twilight when, still extending her Alicorn magic through her ‘Pegasi’ channels, that she could feel Rainbow’s magic teasing the clouds back into shape, puffs of magic carried on the air-currents of her wings and dancing along the edges of the blue Pegasi’s hooves as the injured Mare tended to her house.

A quick glance at Spitfire and Soarin showed that they too were using their magic, somehow forcing the clouds to remain stationary in mid-air just by brushing the fields of magic emerging from their wings against the cloud-matter. Magic was at work, but in a way she’d never even thought could actually work, power flowing and changing without the usual methods that her training as a Unicorn demanded, just through simple effort and unthinking instinct as the Pegasi managed to convince the compressed cloud-matter mansion to remain at a fixed space in the sky, even as wind-currents from the Everfree pushed at the building.

She had experienced something similar when keeping Rainbow’s house from disintegrating during the trip, but the finesse the trio was displaying humbled Twilight. For all her mastery of the arcane, what these Pegasi were doing right now was just as elegant and refined as any spell Twilight might have cast.

Was that this mysterious Innate Magic that Princess Celestia suppressed, or something simpler still? Twilight wondered to herself, frowning as Luna led the way to the Everfree Forest, half the reporters breaking off to stay behind and interview the Wonderbolts, the other half hot on her and Luna’s tails, screaming demands for an interview or …

“EXCUSE ME?” Twilight shouted back, craning her head back over her shoulder to stare at one bold reporter whose question brought a brilliant flush to Twilight’s face, a task made more difficult by her wings flapping to keep Twilight moving forwards fast enough to keep the dementedly determined paparazzi at a suitable distance.

“ARE YOU SEEING ANYONE, PRINCESS TWILIGHT?” The reporter, a sea-green Pegasi with shocking red hair, screamed back, likely assuming Twilight had mis-heard her.

“Are you serious? My private affairs are just that, private!” Twilight shouted back, her horn glowing with power as she considered, briefly, transmuting the idiot’s feathers into lead weights, and instead turned the summoned energy into a cloudy barrier of magic between Luna, herself and the reporters. “First thing I do when I finish my Ascension and officially become a Princess under the laws is figure out a way to repeal these stupid media laws and force these jackals to practice some empathy, along with making journalistic integrity a legal prerequisite for every single article published in an Equestrian-owned paper!”

“You will simply have to learn to tune it out, Twilight. Faust knows my sister has spent hundreds of years mastering such things. That, and she takes a vicarious pleasure in using the outright-slanderous articles as the floor-covering for Philomena’s cage.” Luna replied, a low chuckle spilling out the corners of her mouth as she spoke. “Apparently it’s the best way she knows to apologise to the trees for an otherwise wasteful use of pulped timber.”

“Doesn’t Philomena’s droppings contain large amounts of white phosphorus?”

“And her cage is made from an alloy of adamantite and magically-augmented gold precisely because the first time Cellie brought that infernal bird home, it proceeded to leave incendiary droppings all over our castle. Thankfully, granite doesn’t really burn, but the furniture wasn’t so lucky.”

“And having said papers immolated on a daily basis via incendiary bird poop is just a humorous twist?”

“You know my sister’s sense of humor can be both twisted and frustratingly subtle when she has no other outlets due to the constant presence of Ponies who may use it against her. And besides, it is the best use of Stump’s and Muckraker’s papers.”

Fortunately, the Everfree Forest soon was under their wings, which had an amusing effect on the reporters, as Twilight and Luna found out. Dropping the magical barrier as much due to wanting to preserve her strength for carrying their belongings back to town as a fear of being mobbed by giant, horrible, book-eating moths again, Twilight and her fellow Princess had the dubious honor of watching over fifty Ponies suddenly have their focus shaken when Twilight’s barrier faded away, the paparazzi looking down to see what would cause Twilight to drop the visual barrier and then collectively scream in horror like a flock of chickens in a McNugget factory, with the air-vessels piloted by the Unicorns and Earth Ponies clumsily wheeling about in mid-air, nearly colliding with each other in several cases, and the Pegasi actively trying to climb over each other in mid-air as they realized they’d flown over the outer edge of the Everfree.

“That … is at once hilarious and disturbing.” Twilight muttered as she and Luna hovered and watched the paparazzi scramble back towards the ‘safe’ zone outside of the Everfree’s borders, several of them visibly hyperventilating or having to be carried back down to the ground, having fainted from shock or horror.

“Count our blessings, Twilight. As soon as we make it back to the border, you can be certain the paparazzi will be waiting in force with every camera and recording device known to mortals.” The Lunar Princess replied with a tired smile on her face. “So let’s brain-storm what we might possibly do to either escape their attentions, or give them something more interesting to focus on.”

“I don’t know … did your sister leave any baby Hydras lying around while she took a good portion of the Royal Guard into the Everfree? Maybe if we start tossing baby snake-dragon-thingies at them, those vultures will get the hint.”

“Be-have, Twilight. Besides, that would be far too cruel to the Hydras.”

“Mmmph.”

Thankfully, the trip back to their camp-site was mercifully swift and without distraction, as Luna and Twilight quickly dropped down below the tree-line to avoid being tracked if some of the paparazzi managed to develop the spine to follow the Princesses into the Forest-proper and followed a snaking river deeper into the heart of the Everfree, Luna claiming she could ‘sense’ her portable hole, and Twilight having enough trouble keeping up with Luna, as her wings were unused to such constant use, in addition to pushing a third of a cloud mansion across the sky for an entire hour, to bother arguing with Luna about the absurdity of tying one's magic to a single, infamously fragile device.

Indeed, Twilight found herself enjoying the Everfree, the strange, constantly-changing sensation of the Wild Magic that permeated the area feeling somehow more … friendly towards her than it had before her Ascension as her magic-sensitive horn sensed hundreds of swirling tendrils of the Wild Magic snaking out to caress Luna and herself.

Is it because I am becoming a part of this world, or is it something else? … I really hope Wild Magic, or the Everfree itself, isn’t sentient in some sort of fashion like Luna says these mysterious Powers the Elements of Harmony are derived from, as after the burst of Sympathized Magic Luna and I sent out that night … would that make it a ménages à trois? I mean, that’s not really the right term, and I have no way of knowing if I’m just feeling things that aren’t real because I’m so fatigued right now, but wow I really hope Luna and I didn’t accidentally include a quasi-sentient magical forest during what I hoped was a very private moment!

And speaking of Elements … are they sentient? I still haven’t figured out if what I felt during Rarity’s … breaking from the group was a coherent choice on behalf of Generosity, or some sort of autonomous function of the magic of Harmony that the Element represents? And what does it mean now that I bear two Elements? Will I be compelled to be more generous myself now, or am I just holding onto the Element till a new Bearer emerges?

Why doesn’t Immortality come with a guide-book or something? Gah!

“Twilight, pick up the pace!” Luna called out from up ahead, the dark-coated Alicorn hovering impatiently at the bend of the river, a hoof pointed at something out of Twilight’s sight. “I can see our camp, and something is wrong!”

“Coming!” Twilight shouted back, groaning out loud as her wings protested at their continued abuse as she flapped over to Luna and caught sight of their tent. Please don't be reporters. Please don't be Gryphons. Please don't be Steven ...

Their currently bulging tent, where a large, red, scorpion-like tail emerged, waving in the air vigorously as the owner rummaged around inside the blue-silk tent.

“And suddenly I am reminded of Celestia warning my to not wish for foolish things.” Sighing heavily, Twilight could only face-hoof as a familiar-looking Manticore backed out of the tent, yowling loudly as it turned around and lay down sideways with its hind-quarters disappearing into the tent.

A familiar-looking, heavily pregnant Manticore.

And judging from the way her belly was rippling, said Manticore was about to give birth inside the tent, and would be immediately hostile to anything that came near her during the birthing.

And the stone covering the folded-up Portable Hole, which contained all of their supplies, was well within the range of the giant predator’s deadly fore-claws.

“Buck.” Luna and Twilight whispered together as the Manticore yowled again, the scorpion-like tail lashing around inside the tent as a powerful ripple of muscles under the lion-like creature's skin signalled another contraction.

Chapter 54

CHAPTER 54

The room was nice.

Chrysalis frowned and tried to repress the feeling of gratitude welling up inside her, and her frown turned into a scowl when she failed.

Princess Celestia had almost all the power in this situation, and while Chrysalis had taken steps to ensure her children were somewhat protected, her entire plan still hinged entirely on her enemy being nice.

Ponies could be nice, indeed it seemed to be the default setting for the species aside from a fraction of the population. But Changelings had learned the hard way that being nice to others outside of the Hive only made it more likely you’d become a meal for something else, yet the evidence was clear: Ponies being nice had made them a real power in the world.

Diplomats, merchants, bankers, even just tourists, everywhere Ponies went, they were friendly, they were accepting, they were nice. It made others drop their guard, even reciprocate, and as much as it galled the Changeling Queen to admit, Princess Celestia’s tactics had made her people a force to be reckoned with.

Ponies had become a world-power, possibly the greatest one, by being nice.

If she didn’t already have a tube down her throat, that infernal scarecrow of a doctor probing and prodding her with three Magi scanning her insides as he did so and two terrified-looking servants fluffing her pillows right at that very second, Chrysalis would have probably thrown a massive hissy-fit at the cosmic unfairness of it all.

Strange comfort it was, however, to have the implacable Candy Apple seated next to her head, the thick-set old Mare’s face set into an expression that promised unspeakable suffering to the first being in the room, Pony or otherwise, that caused a scene, the two black twins nestled into the crook of Candy’s thick limb, while the white male stood next to Chrysalis’s head, looking intently at the doctor and mimicking Bedside Manner’s movements, poking his mother’s cheek in time to the doctor’s palpitation, tongue clenched out the side of his mouth as the little one, already far from agile on his hooves, struggled to stay upright on just three hooves.

“Thow muth thungah whill thith thake?” Chrysalis mumbled around the tube, frowning at how her words sounds like the rambling of a common drunk, and grunted as Little White finally gave in to gravity and tumbled forwards, but not before planting a tiny hoof into the side of her muzzle on the way down.

“Not too much longer, your Highness. We’re just … there! You see, that mass of bruising right there?” Bedside said again before bursting into an excited jig of all things, pointing his hoof to a point near Chrysalis’s haunch, and the three Magi all nodded eagerly. “We’re just mapping the worst injuries you’re suffering for now, and tomorrow we should be able to begin planning exactly how we’re be treating them.”

“Thu’wiffic.” The Changeling Queen grunted unhappily, fighting down the urge to rip the tube from her mouth and flog the skinny doctor-pony with it just on principle. Supposedly, the tube contained a concoction made from simple antibiotics and as much processed love as the Hive could spare, but just having it jammed down into her stomach to ‘bypass damaged sub-systems in your convertens organum amoris’, according to that infernal doctor, made her feel both vulnerable and bloated.

That she had multiple organs that served no useful function, wasteful biomass that appeared to be some sort of left-overs or existed to fulfil non-existant biological functions was news to Chrysalis, and news she did not like. Certainly, the Empress had deemed her latest brood ‘deficient’ and sought to purge the Changelings, hence her species arrival in Equestria, but for Chrysalis, a first-generation Queen, to be so aberrant inside? The thought that her vessel was truly imperfect, perhaps even fatally so, chilled Chrysalis’s blood as not even being flung out of Canterlot Castle by the Princess of Buffets and Shining Studmuffin had done so. Not even Twilight dropping an entire castle ontop of her had terrified Chrysalis so much as the knowledge that her body was not divine perfection.

This does nothing for our cause, and I refuse to lay here and be prodded for nothing! Hive, report: Any changes in your situations?

Drone Prime reporting. We are still not permitted to turn our chambers into a suitable hive, although the Drone-Prime of Queen Celestia is willing to allow us to change the coloured paper on the walls if you wish. Drone-Prime of Hive Celestia was less than enthused when asked if we could also remove the furniture and make proper cocoons to sleep in.

Scout Prime here, my Queen. Situation remains the same, although we have managed to convince the Guard Prime of the Ponies that the Kattians will receive better care under our hooves than theirs. She appears to be allergic to them, which not only helped us win that dispute, but we may be able to use to our advantage should we need to escape from this Hive.

The fact that, despite intense coaching from their Queen, every Drone, Scout and Guard still tried to refer to the Ponies around them as though they were another Changeling Hive worried Chrysalis. Injured as she was, it was … difficult to provide proper instruction to her Changelings through the stored memories within the Hive-Mind, and with the distractions before her, the Hive was slipping back into what each individual Changeling was most comfortable with, and that could cause misunderstandings with the Ponies …

Scout-Drone reporting from the end of the hallway, My Queen. Guard-Drone ‘Dappled’ appears to be fine, but apparently accidentally taking his reproductive organs into my mouth has terrified him and he will not come near me without an escort. I offered to allow him to do the same if it would make him feel at ease, and the other Guard-Drones of Hive Celestia apparently found this very amusing and are asking if Guard-Drone ‘Dappled’ is interested in something called ‘formicophilia’. This appears to distress him greatly, and my efforts to calm him only seem to make his distress greater.

Thankfully, Bedside Manner and the Magi took the fit of ‘coughing’ that overcame Chrysalis as simply a symptom of her injuries, and not the side-effects of repressing the overwhelming desire to explode with hysterical laughter.

Guard Prime here. I am still being challenged to ‘hoof wrestle’ matches due to the blood-pact between yourself and Queen Celestia precludes actual fighting. I appear to have acquired a substantial amount of small, golden disks for winning, and their loss appears to have a demoralizing effect on these Guard-Drones of Hive Celestia. Are you aware of the significance of these ‘bits’ the Guard-Drones are giving me when I beat them in this challenge they are so fond of?

Keep close watch on the Ponies and ensure our needs are met, but again, do nothing that might jeopardize our alliance with them at this time. Queen Celestia believes a ‘trial’ before her Drones will help prove we mean them no threat, and thus they will be more receptive to the news we bring. If we make the Pony-Drones afraid of us, our chances to rally an army from their Hives dwindle to nearly impossible. Queen Chrysalis ordered the Hive as a group, and then turned her mental ‘attention’ to the individuals whom were most likely to come into contact with the Ponies, trying desperately to keep a grin from her face as she sorted through the memories from said Changelings and keeping her own memories of Ponies from seeping into the Hive-Mind.

She had spent decades amongst Ponies, after all, and most of the Drones who had survived their explosive exodus from Canterlot itself were far too young to either have lived during those years in Equestria and would be filtering their responses through the stored memories and life-experiences of their older brothers and sisters embedded in the Hive-Mind itself without proper context and come across as either addled or just thick, or were not mentally matured enough to grasp the social or cultural weight of those memories and would likely make the situation worse. Probably in hilarious fashion, but still, worse.

Still, at least the Hive’s comfort with the terminology they were using would make complex commands to the less-experienced Drones a little easier on her part, so Chrysalis played alone without reprimanding them for failing.

Guard Prime, keep half of the bits, they may be useful to us later, but return the other half to the Guard-Drones of Hive Celestia. This will make them consider you, and by association the rest of our Hive, in a positive light. Continue to ‘hoof wrestle’, but pretend to lose to individuals who show themselves to be talkative and friendly. We may use them as a source of information, or leverage if things go sour during the trial.

I hear and obey, my Queen.

Drone Prime, you are to do nothing to alter the rooms for now, but try to impress upon the Drone Prime of Hive Celestia that cocoons make our Drones more comfortable than beds. Explain to the Drone Prime of Hive Celestia that we will allow their Magi … errr … Spell-Drones to monitor our sleeping Hive-members if that will ease their fears.

I hear and obey, my Queen, but the Drone Prime of Hive Celestia seems concerned about our Drones staining the fluffy substance coating the floor with our resin. Is this fluffy substance some form of fungus or lichen they cultivate for food?

… It is a luxury item intended to make the room more comfortable. The Ponies call it ‘carpet’.

… My Queen, when I asked the Drone Prime if I could eat her carpet, she turned bright red and fled the room. Is that a normal Pony reaction?

Bedside Manner became very concerned for his unusual patient as she suffered another coughing-fit, as well as began hammering the soft mattress with a hoof, tears squeezing out the corners of her eyes. Little White simply sensed his mother’s mirth and hugged her head, radiating a simple delight back at her that snapped Chrysalis out of her ‘fit’.

By the Spawning Pit, when the Drone Prime of Hive Celestia returns, apologise and explain you thought the floor coverings were a form of dried, edible food the Ponies kept around for times of scarcity. She probably believes you just asked if you could perform oral sex on her!

… Forgive my ignorance, but how is eating a floor-covering representative of sexual acts?

If you can, access the Hive-Mind and find the memories of the Infiltrator Caste, and narrow your search to memories pertaining to ‘red lights’, ‘Mares’ and ‘lesbians’. You will find your answers there, Drone Prime.

… I do not understand, but I obey, my Queen.

Well, before anything else goes wrong, Scout Prime, remind the Ponies that the Kattians will require certain amenities. And while we’re here, also request a number of brushes and food for our furry comapnions, as well as several dozen large, shallow tubs, filled with a type of material the Ponies will call ‘kitty litter’. It will make close-quarter living with the Kattians far more pleasant for all parties involved.

My Queen, we will also need a large supply of dried fish to feed the Kattians. Unlike Ponies, they are carnivorous and will quickly flee if not able to eat, or worse still, may attempt to take down and kill either a Changeling or Pony to feed themselves.

Worry not, Scout Prime. Ponies of Hive Celestia regularly entertain ambassadors from the other races, including fully-carnivorous ones. There are also Thestrals, a kind of Pony who thrive during the night, whose diet is omnivorous. Access to a source of meat for the Kattians will not be an issue, so long as you point it out to the Drones of Hive Celestia.

It shall be done, my Queen.

And now for you, Drone-Scout. Chrysalis’s mouth twitched into a quickly-suppressed smile as she narrowed her connection down to ‘Scout’ in the Hive Mind, a private two-way connection as she ran the young Changeling through Pony social-customs between genders, and what might be expected of her.

The Ponies had no idea how powerful this ‘Dappled Light’ could be. While not capable of levelling buildings or conjuring devastating arcane power, an empath capable of instilling such apathy and disinterest in those around them was a rare, valuable prize, and sadly now Princess Celestia was all-too aware of his existence which precluded Chrysalis monopolizing him for her own needs.

Still, empathic abilities were often passed down through a bloodline, and even if this alliance with the Ponies lasted, Chrysalis fully intended to keep building strengths into her Hive until they truly were ‘perfect’. If Scout could absorb the essence of Dappled, then Chrysalis could extract it from the Changeling at a later point in time and apply the unique traits to the store of genetic potential she had already harvested and stored within her from Shining Armor, a powerful physical specimen in addition to being a potent Unicorn, as well as the scores of other Ponies from the other Tribes she had used to improve her Hive’s biological potential over the years.

I … my Queen, I am not adverse to this mission, but from the memories you have asked me to access, is not such actions normally undertaken between Ponies who possess strong feelings towards one another? Would doing this for any other reason possibly cause offence to Guard-Drone Dappled?

And are you telling me the feelings of concern and anger you felt on the train when Guard-Drone Glimmer started to praise Guard-Drone Dappled meant nothing?

… My emotions are in flux. I do not know how to answer.

I am not asking you to kill the Pony, Scout, merely convince him to mount you and leave his essence inside you. I will extract it and add it to my stores, and if you decide to continue receiving his essence, so long as you duties to the Hive are not compromised, I will not take issue with it. The Hive is well aware I quite enjoyed harvesting Guard-Prime Shining Armor, and I suspect you will receive similar enjoyment harvesting Guard-Drone Dappled.

I do not understand why I feel this way about a Pony, my Queen. He is not of the Hive, but I feel drawn to him. Do you understand why I am acting so strangely?

Possibly because of his empathic nature, on some level his powers and our Hive-Mind have intersected and as the Changeling most often in contact with him, you are feeling the side-effects more strongly than the rest of the Hive. Possibly because my injuries have prevented me from properly filtering the Hive-Mind, so you and the other Changelings have been affected by the stored memories of the Changelings who came before you, and the Ponies whom we cocooned and whose memories we took to better infiltrate the Pony Hives. Chrysalis reached out through the Hive-Mind and gently ruffled Scout’s mind-glow, sending equal amounts of exasperation and affection to the confused, conflicted Changeling. Or maybe you’re just being young and foolish.

My apologies, my Queen, but none of those theories provide me with much comfort.

In such matters, my child, there generally aren’t any real answers. Just trust in the memories I have given you and try to understand he will be as nervous and confused as you are. Ponies are difficult, fractious, divided beings, but this Guard-Drone, Dappled, has a gift that makes him closer to us than most of his kind can ever get. Use this to bring him around to our side of things, and if you should keep him at your side in the process, well then, that is just a happy little bonus for you.

I wish to serve the Hive, but I … I do not wish to harm this Pony.

Then don’t. This Trial will take several weeks at the very least, plenty of time for you to explore the depth of whatever connection you can make with him. If you believe he can join our Hive, insofar as any Pony can, then so be it. If he is incompatible with us, then your mission is merely to procure enough essence for me to inject his empathic potential into the next generation of Changelings. I will guide you as I am able, but this mission is to be pursued with minimal interaction with the Hive-Mind, am I understood? Your fellow Changelings will have enough to deal with without the sensation of you mating with Guard-Drone Dappled blasting through the network.

I hear and obey, my Queen.

Chrysalis was rudely interrupted by a hoof prodding her side, causing a flare of pain that made her choke on the tube down her throat and disrupting her connection to the Hive-Mind for several heart-beats, the Changeling Queen giving the doctor a dirty look that made him back up a half-step.

“Theth?”

“Ah, my apologies, your majesty, but I have a question about any allergic reactions you may have experienced before?” Bedside Manner asked, a trembling attempt at a friendly smile plastering itself to his face.

It is going to be a long day. Chrysalis thought, wincing as the echoes of agreement came back from the Hive as Candy Apple plopped the Black Twins down onto the bed to join their brother, leaving Chrysalis to deal with three very hungry and bored offspring and a Pony doctor who was stubbornly determined to pry information out of Chrysalis that, quite frankly, she was not sure she actually possessed.

And the worse part of it was that he was being so damned nice about it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a torture to slowly levitate the rock off the folded-up Portable Hole, while Luna used her magic to slowly drag the enchanted circle of spider-webs and a literal fragment of the night sky across the ground as the Manticore thrashed and yowled at the top of her lungs, one adorable if still deadly cub already suckling at the beast’s milk-heavy teats, the once-immaculate tent now shredded by the constant lashing of the Manticore’s scorpion-like tail and wickedly-sharp hind-claws.

A problem with levitating an object that most non-Unicorns never considered was that one needed to see the target to be able to apply the telekinetic field in the first place. Once contact was made, unless something drastic happened, it was all but impossible for a Unicorn’s telekinesis to be disrupted even if visual contact was lost, although the individual’s mental strength and physical stamina still had a part to play in how long they could carry significant weight with their telekinesis. But to pick something up with their magic, a Unicorn needed to still be able to see the target.

And since Luna had made certain to fold up the Portable Hole as small as it could be to avoid any accidents involving their supplies before that ill-fated trip into Ponyville to return the Apple family’s cart and borrow a hot shower, that meant both Alicorns had to get close to the damnable thing, which meant getting within visual range of the Manticore, let alone its other senses, and since the clearing their tent had been set up in was tiny and shielded from the air by a pair of weeping willow trees, whose drooping branches interlocked to form a nearly impenetrable shield from the air, that meant their only option was to come in from a tiny opening in the brushes at the back of the small clearing … or the water.

Ironically, the very fact that the clearing was accessible only through a narrow path at the back or, if one had wings, to fly in over the river, was now working against them. The Manticore might not have been able to fly for long with her small wings and pronounced pregnancy, but she obviously had been able to get enough lift to flutter into the clearing and then use the tent and the bedding inside as a make-shift nest for her brood.

“This is … absurd.” Luna hissed angrily, clinging to her side of the rock as the icy-cold water threatened to dislodge both Ponies from the ancient block of granite in the water that had served as their marker for the camp’s location, while Twilight settled for a grunt as the cold water seeped in through her feathers and fur, chilling her as Luna finally dragged the Portable Hole out from under the rock, which Twilight was able to slowly put down, the slight rattle muffled by the Manticore’s loud, pain-filled yowl as another of it’s young came into the world. “One hurdle after another! What next? Tirek escaping from the bowels of Tartarus? A Cutiemark-hating Cult?”

While the ‘hiding-in-the-river-to-mask-our-scent’ plan was working, it did have a few critical flaws. First of all, Alicorns, like Pegasi, were not ducks. Their feathers were able to resist rain to a certain extent, but complete submersion like what they now endured would waterlog their feathers and prevent either Luna or Twilight from taking to the air under their own wingpower.

Secondly, they were getting very cold, and that would sap their mental strength to the point where their spells might fail or worse yet, let one or both of them succumb to fatigue.

Luna might not be able to drown, but Twilight was still mostly mortal, as Luna kept on mentioning in whispers interspaced with involuntary chattering from the very cold water.

“Important as this artefact may be, it is not worth our lives, Twilight!”

“We are not leaving the Fold of the Night Sky under a rock! That relic is a national treasure and the blueprint for every pocket-dimension theory Ponykind has developed!” Twilight chattered back at Luna, her teeth clacking against each other as she spoke, eyes glued to the Manticore as Luna painstakingly dragged the folded-up relic towards them and further away from the Manticore. “As soon as we can, we snatch up the Fold, you wrap up up in your tail and we hightail it back to the Apple’s farm for a hot shower.”

“My divine gifts should not be used for a snatch-and-grab …”

“Well, I don’t have any divine gifts right now, and I know Fluttershy would give me the Stare for a week straight if we disturbed the Manticore right now, so let’s just take it back and go.”

“Honestly, you sound like Celestia so much sometimes it is creepy …” Luna grumbled, slowly pulling the Portable Hole towards them and, once it was in range, her tail swept out underwater, pulling Twilight into it’s depths, then consuming Luna, the portable hole still floating in the Lunar Princess’s telekinetic grip as the animate piece of the night sky floated till it was just above the surface of the river before shooting off into the air, the Manticore and her two kits oblivious to their near-brush with Ponykind.

“You know, I never thought about this before, but where are we exactly? In your tail, I mean? Or some pocket-dimension?”

“To be … completely honest, I am not entirely sure. Celestia believes I am retreating ‘inside’ myself when I do this, and I have never thought to actually find out where ‘here’ is. It simply ‘is’, and it became a part of my being when I Ascended.”

“Are you telling me you never actually tried to figure out how your ‘divine gifts’ actually work? What if there’s some sort of fatal flaw, or a hidden weakness?”

“When one Ascends Twilight, we are … gifted is not the right term, but it is the closest word in mortal tongues to the knowledge we receive from the Powers. One becomes innately aware of everything one can do once they Ascend, and exactly how far their abilities can be pushed. That is not to say that one cannot increase the strength or utility of those abilities with training or study or … other processes, but the Powers placed the information I required directly into my mind when I Ascended, and I believe that if the very forces of creation saw fit to include a ‘fatal flaw’ into my powers, as you call it, then perhaps there was a reason for them to not do so.”

“Really? You’d just accept that on blind faith? I’m sorry, Luna, I am a scientist as much as a mage, I cannot simply accept …”

“Twilight? Consider that the Powers are not constrained by the flow of time as we are.”

“Your point being?”

“My point is that as the Powers exist outside of normal time and space while simultaneously being sentient expressions of the fundamental forces of Creation, they would likely be aware that I would be corrupted into Nightmare Moon, and later restored to my original self by the Elements of Harmony. My ignorance of my ‘fatal flaws’ prevented me from protecting myself against the Nightmare Spirit, true, but my ignorance also protected the entire world from the unending rage of that unincarnated spirit when it plundered my mind for secrets while it possessed my form.”

“That … but I …”

“Trust me, dearest Twilight, trying to second-guess entities that exist both as sentient beings on a level of existence so removed from our own that un-Ascended minds that try to reach them tend to literally implode from the mortal mind trying to make sense of the impressions it receives, and as self-aware forces of creation that exist at every place and every moment simultaneously is a very good choice if one wishes to either go insane, or spend the rest of their immortal existence navel-gazing and trying to wrap their third-dimensional minds around the impossibility of sentient concepts and forces.” Luna ‘chuckled’ in the disembodied … existence? Unidentified space? Twilight struggled to come up with a term to describe the indescribable and felt a massive headache coming on … assuming she actually still had a head and wasn’t just a sentient energy-wave trapped within Luna’s own energy-wave in whatever non-space they currently occupied. “The Powers seek only to aid Creation, Twilight, if only because they are Creation itself. They would not lightly create champions to ease the burden of keeping every level of Creation moving along steadily with your ‘fatal flaws’, especially when it takes them so much effort to reach down into our level of reality and shape their thoughts in such a way that the Ascended can actually comprehend them.”

“Okay, so while we’re stuck in here, I have a question. Ascended, Immortals, Princesses, all terms to describe the same thing, former Mortals made into immortal life-forms by the Powers and tied to a fundamental part of our local part of ‘Creation’, yes?”

“While it skips a great deal of nuance and decades of explanations … yes.”

“So explain to me what the buck Discord is.”

“A God.”

“So, another Immortal?”

“No, no, definitely not! While it is easier for us to sometimes declare ourselves ‘Gods’, Twilight, simply to make our roles easier for Mortals to understand, understand that if anything, we are on the very bottom of any form of Deific pecking-order. Immortals are tied to a single world and a small number of focuses, including the preservation and advancement of the species they were Ascended from.” Luna explained, her ‘voice’ filled with equal parts of amused horror and concern. “Do not, even for an instant, assume that you can stand against a God even with the Elements of Harmony, Twilight, and never forget the Elements are fragments of the Powers themselves and have their own agendas. Even Ascended, your ability to use them is entirely dependant upon your actions serving the cause of Harmony, the perfect center found between all the forces that make up the Powers. Rely solely on the power the Elements possess, and you are likely to be left utterly defenceless, especially if the Powers believe you need a lesson in humility and your ‘place’ within their grand design. They are especially fond of yanking the metaphorical carpet out from under our hooves if our agendas start to drift from what they envisioned for us, and given that it can take them a considerable amount of time to focus their attention on a single Immortal on a single world nestled within a single layer of all of Creation, it could take centuries, if not longer, for them to let you know you’ve strayed from their plans, which could lead to terrible results if your ‘deviant actions’ are the only thing keeping a species or nation alive, and suddenly you are struck down for several centuries at a time with powerlessness.”

“But as to your question of what Discord is? We don’t actually know, although the Parliament of Immortals believes that Discord could be classified as a ‘Greater Demi-God’. A God is an extra-planar being who can freely travel from world to world, who possesses many of the strengths of an Immortal and few of our constraints, although unlike ourselves, they can die. Gods of all stripes act as forces of change, both creation and destruction, drifting through the layers of reality and enforcing their unique natures on everything they come into contact with. The fact that Discord can wield the very powers of Chaos to warp reality, a very rare power and one almost unheard of when simple sorcery is capable of similar results without opening oneself to the endless warp-and-weave that is the Primal Chaos, and the Parliament’s classification rings true.”

“Doesn’t ‘Demi-God’ imply he’s a Lesser God? How can one be a ‘Greater Lesser God’? That doesn’t make any sense!”

“Demi-God as in ‘partial’ God would be a more accurate translation, especially when the term was applied by a very old Immortal speaking a very different tongue to modern Equestrian. Back on topic, most Gods have very distinct portfolios, much like Immortals as I said before however, most ‘Gods’ control very specific and narrow types of power, generally concepts such as Luck, or Benevolence or even Decay, and very few Gods control an actual part of Creation, such as having control over suns or mountains like Immortals do. Gods who can draw upon the various forces that make up the Powers, like Discord can use the power of Chaos, are mercifully rare and often struggle against each other for control of entire swaths of the galaxy, although even they must bow to the will of the Powers or face destruction. Remember, Gods can die, and are frequently, on a cosmological scale, killed during their frequent disputes with one-another and the native Immortals of the various worlds that boast sentient life.”

“No, in Discord’s case, the Parliament theorized during our first encounters with him that Discord is a sentient fragment of the Power we call Chaos that got lost and separated from the rest of the Powers during one of their trips into our layer of reality to contact an Immortal, and over the millennia this fragment developed into a self-sufficient sentient trans-planar life-form on his own once cut-off from the rarified plane of existence the sentience of the Powers dwells within. He obeys nothing and no entity that we can understand other than his every-changing whims, the Powers could only turn him to stone, and we tried using the Elements on him many times in the past, and all they did was remove the pigeon-poop from his statue, a fact that caused both my sister and I no end of frustration and apparently amused the Elements of Harmony to no end. The fact that the Gods that strive against each other to control our specific arm of the galaxy refused to come anywhere near Equuis once Discord appeared on our world, and even made a collective formal complaint to my sister when she had Fluttershy ‘rehabilitate’ him speaks volumes for Discord’s power, or at least reputation amongst the Gods.”

“So Discord is a super-god? Some sort of ancient fragment of the Powers themselves, much like the Elements? When I found them back when I fought Nightmare … uh, when I first came to Ponyville …”

“Twilight, I do not object to you talking about that abomination, just so long as you can remember Nightmare Moon was a separate entity possessing my body. It takes a great deal out of my patience when my little Ponies claim I am Nightmare Moon. That would be like having Ponies come up and trying to say you are Trixie Lulamoon because you’re both unicorns and can cast spells.”

“Point taken. Okay, so, fighting Nightmare Moon, neither of us really need to go over what happened that day, but the Elements of Harmony, the five that were physically present, were all turned to stone. Discord was turned to stone. The exact same type of stone might I point out? This might just be a lack of sleep and the beginnings of a psychosis at work, but consider that when their power was used against the purpose of Harmony, when Celestia blasted Nightmare Moon with the Elements without relying upon her sister to wield half of them, the Elements of Harmony turned into stone and the Element of Magic disappeared entirely from the world, correct?”

“Yes, but where are you going with this?”

“Well … what if the reason that Discord was turned to stone was because he was disrupting the plans of these ‘Powers’ you speak of, just like the Elements of Harmony ‘shut down’ when they were forced to activate incorrectly? So the same mechanism that forced the Elements of Harmony to deactivate until new wielders came into existence might have also forced Discord to ‘shut down’ once he came into contact with these Powers through the medium of the Elements of Harmony.”

“… That is a frightening hypothesis, Twilight, but it does fit with the Parliament’s theories on Discord’s true nature. If Discord truly is a fragment of the Powers, much as the Elements are, then it would explain why the Gods are so terrified of him, and why the Immortals of this world have been left mostly to their own devices without the Pantheons trying to push us to join one side or another, because if Discord ever decided to turn his powers to lethal force, he could quite easily kill another God, or even a number of them all at once. Those who may wield the forces of the Powers directly are capable of reshaping reality to suit their whims, after all.”

“Okay, so does that mean that the Gods are all fragments of the Powers who ‘got lost’ in our level of Creation and devolved into independent creatures?”

“Nobody but the Gods know where the Gods came from. Even the Powers remain silent on the matter, and the Gods are loathe to share their secrets with ‘mere’ Immortals. I know for a fact that our world’s indifference to their constant struggles for dominance and territory aggravates the Pantheons to no end, and part of my own Ascension involved taking control over Equestria’s night sky, which includes deflecting random meteorites and rogue planetoids that certain Gods send our way in spiteful attempts to wipe this world clean of sentient life to punish the ‘uppity’ Immortals for refusing to side with them.”

“THEY DO WHAT? WITH WHAT?”

“Have you never wondered why the moon is covered in craters? However, I will admit I am rather interested in learning who or what was swatting these giant rocks out of the sky before I took over the role?”

“HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALM ABOUT THIS? ALL-POWERFUL BEINGS ARE TRYING TO WIPE OUT LIFE ON OUR WORLD!”

“Correction, Twilight: A very small number of almost all-powerful beings have been trying to wipe out life on our world. And from what the Powers and those few Gods who have no interest in dominion or control over our world have told us, those ‘rebellious’ Gods have either been wiped from Creation during their interminable wars with one another, or have been so heavily censured by the Powers that they are almost non-existant to begin with. It’s just their attacks against Equuis can take a few thousand years or so to actually reach us, so their punishment sadly does little to save us from their crimes.”

“FSDJGH!”

“Please don’t have a melt-down inside my … tail-space? I have no idea what will happen if you try to teleport out of here and my sister will never let me hear the end of it if your Ascension ends here.”

“GODS ARE TRYING TO FLATTEN US WITH ROCKS FROM OUTER SPACE? I THINK FREAKING OUT IS A PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE RESPONSE TO THIS! HOW COME YOU AND PRINCESS CELESTIA NEVER SAID ANYTHING? WE COULD HAVE PREPARED … UNITED THE WORLD TO CREATE SOMETHING TO DESTROY THESE PLANET-KILLERS CENTURIES AGO!”

“Listen to yourself right now and understand why my sister and I, as well as the other Immortals, never said anything to the Mortals. Between Celestia frying the bigger missiles with Solar Flares before they even get within the solar-system, and my moon being used as a shield to deflect or absorb the smaller ones or the fragments that survive her strikes, along with the Powers themselves working, in their own way, to stop the ones throwing said rocks at us across the emptiness of the Great Void, our world is almost perfectly safe.”

“… I just want to go home. We have the Fold, let’s stop by Berry Punch’s for something alcoholic, drop a shield-barrier over the library and get myself so blootered that I skip distressed and go straight to destroyed so I can wake up tomorrow and forget everything you just told me.”

“Why would you …”

“Luna, you just dropped the knowledge that there are beings out there more powerful than Princess Celestia who have attempted to destroy the world, multiple times no less, on me without any warning. It is taking everything I’ve got not to muscle out of this … non-space that you know absolutely nothing about, despite the fact it is a part of your own damn body … and rush straight home so I can figure out how to build giant cannons to blow giant space-rocks out of the sky before they wipe out all life on Equuis.” Twilight turned and fixed her attention, surly and demented as it was, on the place in the non-space that she felt she ‘heard’ Luna’s voice coming from. “The only reason I am not is that you’ve said that you and Princess Celestia have been hoofing it for millennia, and the last time I tried to solve a problem that big, I ended up creating a stable time-loop and accident-proofing the entire country for a disaster that never actually showed up.”

“… Fair point. Before we head back into town, what’s your favourite poison?”

“Promise you won’t laugh?”

“After learning I’ve caused you this much distress, I will Pinkie Promise that I won’t.”

“That … won’t be necessary, especially since the last thing I want is Pinkie popping out of nowhere while we’re … otherwise distracted if you slip up on that promise. No, I … actually don’t drink. My first real drink was when Applejack accidentally gave me a mug of hard-cider after the Flim Flam brothers came to town, and the second time I've drunk alcohol was in Celestia’s room that night she tricked us into touching horns. I was more concerned about the fact I had apparently upset you, and less about why Princess Celestia’s apple-cider tasted funny, and by the time we’d had two or three dozen glasses of the stuff, I guess I had stopped caring about what it was I was actually drinking.”

“But you asked if alcohol would affect your Ascension! You mean to say you’ve only ever had hard cider twice in your life? That you’ve never had a pint of beer?”

“No.”

“Wine? Mead?”

“No, and I don’t think anypony actually makes mead anymore.”

“Then the world is a slightly more miserable place! What about Whiskey? Vodka? Tequila?”

“No, no and definitely not! I am not drinking anything with a worm in it.”

“… Well then, dearest Twilight, in apology for upsetting you so, I promise that when we get back to your library, you are going to go on an adventure.” Luna said, with sudden steel in her voice. “We shall calm thine nerves with the sweet ambrosia of the vine, and then I shall ensure your dreams stay silent till you awaken on the morrow.”

Chapter 55

CHAPTER 55

“Twilight? Princess Luna? What brings you here, the lunch-rush finished an hour or so ago, didn’t it?” Berry Punch asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise as the two Alicorns slipped into her small bar, looking somewhat damp and mildly homicidal, the sound of distant shouting echoing into the bar as the door opened, and cutting off immediately as Princess Luna slammed the door shut behind them.

“We’re here to see how much alcohol it takes to get me blootered.”

“Ahem. We’re here to see what type of alcohol Twilight has a preference for.”

“And my preference is what will be the quickest way to get from sober and frustrated to delightful oblivion.”

“Twilight …”

“Luna, we had to sneak out of the Everfree Forest inside of a fake Timber Wolf just so the reporters would run away and we could make a break for town. And it ended up attracting the attention of a real one. Which is currently abusing an unfortunately-placed knothole in our fake one. Vigorously.” Twilight snapped, one eye twitching in a fashion that made Berry Punch think of purple-coloured mushroom clouds. “A fake Timber Wolf that I just so happened to occupy the back end of.”

“Ouch. D’you want a padded seat, a bag of ice or a cigarette?” Berry Punch’s mouth engaged before her brain did, and for several moments, found herself the focus of attention for two of the Princesses of Equestria, before Twilight burst into stammering, blushing so heavily Berry thought the purple Alicorn was about to spontaneously combust, while Luna fell over onto her side, clutching her sides and howling with laughter.

“N-none of those! I made a shield-barrier just in time, but uh … I feel the need to bleach my brain of the past ten minutes of my life, so uh … my options?”

“Oh, oh, oh don’t worry Twilight, I’m sure it’s … knot a problem!” Luna gasped from the floor, before continuing her fit of laughter on the floor, ignoring Twilight as she levitated a cushion off a stool and began battering Luna with it.

“NOT HELPING, LUNA!”

“Sounds like your day has … gone to the dogs?” Berry Punch offered with a broad grin, earning a loud groan from Twilight and a wheeze that sounded like “yes!” from the prone Princess on her floor.

“Just … just what would you recommend, Berry Punch? I’m afraid hard cider has been my only real alcoholic experience thus-far, and Luna tells me soon I’ll need an entire keg of beer to get even a little bit tipsy, so … figured I might as well make up for all those missed opportunities in college, and learn what sort of drinks I actually enjoy before I start getting diplomatic ‘gifts’ that I won’t be able to stand.”

“Oh man, I can just imagine the parties where a bunch of rich young Unicorns get together? Champagne, caviar, licking salt off a stripper’s sheat…”

“Whooooooooa, no! Hold your horses there, Berry, if they were doing that kind of stuff, I wasn’t invited. Youngest Pony to ever make it into Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns, remember?” Twilight stammered, easing herself onto a bar-stool and giving the bar-mare a nervous grin. “So … go easy on me, okay? Let’s start with the simple stuff, and work our way up from there?”

“Oh wow, you really haven’t touched the sauce, have you? Don’t tell the Apples, but hard cider is barely even alcohol as far as I’m concerned.” Berry Punch chuckled, reaching under the counter for two bottles, then again for a trio of shot-glasses and a spoon. “Tell you what, we’ll get some grub in your belly, then we’ll get started with an old favourite of mine, the buttery nipple, just to see if you like your mixed spirits, and after that, we’ll try some other stuff.”

“This sounds depraved …” Luna snorted, having dragged herself back up onto her hooves and seating herself on a barstool next to Twilight, her ethereal mane rapidly going back from a crumpled mess from her fit on the ground back to it’s normal, flowing self. “Is not the more common name something to do with roosters, suction and cowponies?”

“Eh, I figure we don’t want to scare the newbie off. So, we’ll stick to ‘buttery nipple’ until she’s feeling a bit more mellow.” Berry replied over her shoulder as she retreated out behind the bar for a moment, a loud clattering announcing her presence as she rummaged through the store-room for something, and came back with a basket containing some avocados and a loaf of bread. “So before anypony starts drinking on an empty stomach, here’s an old standby for when I don’t have the time to have a proper meal before I start drinking: avocado toast. It’ll slow the spread of alcohol through your system, although if we had the time, I’d say we should have goat cheese and beet salad to really prep our stomachs, but this’ll do for a rush job.”

“Why not just make the salad then?” Twilight mumbled, staring at the avocados nervously. They’d never been a favourite food of hers, although her mother had sworn by them … and pineapples.

Faust only knew the nightmares Twilight had suffered when she had made the mistake of asking Velvet why she insisted Night Light have so much pineapple in his diet.

“Because I’m willing to bet you’ll be calling for Ralph and Huey before we’re done, and I am not wasting a perfectly good salad on a recon-run of your alcohol tolerance when just toast will do.”

“Ralph? Huey?” Luna asked, looking perplexed.

“Well, now I am nervous.” Twilight muttered as Berry Punch loaded up a toaster with slices of bread, and began cutting the avocados in half before moving on to the making of the ‘buttery nipples’. Twilight looked upon the process nervously as Berry Punch poured a semi-transparent yellowy-brown liquid into the glasses with a practiced ease, then put the spoon in her mouth, concave-side down and sticking out over the glasses, then slowly poured the other drink, a milky brown-white substance over the domed part of the spoon’s head into the glasses, creating a two-layered offering.

“Ain’t nothing to be scared of with alcohol … provided you pace yourself.” Berry Punch dropped the spoon onto the table, her voice shifting to a very authoritarian tone as she placed a hoof on top of Twilight’s shot-glass before Twilight reach for it. “Now I like a drink, flames of Tartarus, Ponies call me the town drunk because I like my sauce that much, but I drink to my limit and not a drop more. So we’re gonna push your boundaries today, Twilight, in privacy, with some food in your belly and with supervision from Ponies who know their sauce, but when I cut you off, that’s me telling you and Luna when you’ve hit your limit and it’s on your head to remember that for next time. Piña Colada would never forgive me if I sent her favourite Princess to the hospital for alcohol poisoning.”

Berry Punch removed her hoof from the top of the glass, and then nudged it over to Twilight with the edge of her hoof as the toaster dinged, six slices of slightly-browned bread popping up out of the slots, the bar-mare turning rapidly with a half of a avocado and began smearing the pale-green innards of the fruit over the toast. “Always have something in your stomach before you start drinking, Twilight. Now this drink is what we call a ‘shooter’, meaning you slam it down your throat as fast as you can, like a bullet.”

“So how do I taste it then?” Twilight asked, picking the glass up between her hooves and staring at it as if expecting an angry Hydra or, worse still, a bitterly disapproving Princess Celestia to burst out of the creamy top layer before putting it back down again and nudging the drink away to the side.

“Shooters? You don’t, which is a crime against good booze if you ask me, but normally you’d drink something light to start off the night and then move on to the heavier stuff as the fun progresses. Here, we’re testing what kind of drinks you like, and what your tolerance is, so we’re gonna start you off on something hard and see how you react.” Berry explained, pulling up a stool on her side of the bar and shoving a plate of avocado-covered toast into the space between the three mares. With a deft flick of her wrist, Berry Punch snapped up a slice of the toast and devoured it with a swiftness that would have done Pinkie Pie proud, licking the last traces of avocado from her lips.

“Uh, thank you for the meal then, I … yeah …” Twilight mumbled, picking up a slice and crunching her way through it, hoping the long lessons on decorum and social customs drilled into her skull as a child under Princess Celestia’s tutelage held as the flesh of the avocado fruit hit her tongue. Toast made it a little more palatable, but it still tasted like fruit-flavoured grease to her.

Luna on the other hoof picked up the food and attacked it with great gusto, eyes closing as she savoured the meal. “Truly, Ponies have come such a long way in the past thousand years! Before my time on the moon, such fruits had to be shipped up the coast from Mulexico, and they would require a host of preservation spells to survive the trip, which made them taste absolutely vile.”

“Heh, there’s a couple of greenhouse-farms down south and on the isles that specialize in avocados and other tropical fruits, and ship their produce up to us on the trains and with zeppelins, but those have only been around for the past five or six years. Before then, we had to get the more exotic stuff express-ferried into Equestria on a special train all the way from Mulexico, which is where I met Piña’s dad. I was working as a fruit-picker to pay my way after I failed to get into college, and I’d gone to Mulexico to get away from my family, who were on my plot, trying to get me to settle down and become a house-mare for some nine-to-five Stallion they’d picked for me.” The bar-mare sighed and stared at her next slice of toast with a sad smile on her face. “Paloma was a lousy fruit-picker, but by Celestia’s beard, he could mix a mean chimayó cocktail …”

“Sounds like a lovely Stallion. Did he … not follow you back to Equestria?” Luna asked hesitantly as she picked up her second slice, eyes alight with interest.

“No, we wanted to, but he had to look after his grandmother, and she was in such poor health the trip across the border would have likely killed her. But he did give me, ah, one for the road you could say. Hence where Piña got her name from. Like I said, the Stallion could mix a mean cocktail. I guess I’m like a lot of Mares in this day and age, with a foal at our heels but no Stallion under our roof. Although in my case, it wasn’t something I looked for, but I’d do it all over again if given the chance.” Berry gave a soft chuckle before eating her slice, much, much slower this time and took a long time swallowing before she spoke again. “Paloma knows he’s got a daughter, if that’s what you’re asking, and Piña knows who her dad is, I even managed to get a family pedigree out of him before some shit hit the fan when he got stuck with a shotgun marriage. His wife … well, she’s not the sharing type, and when I tried to contact her about visitation rights, that’s when I learned my Paloma had got involved with a Cartel.”

“Wait, I was under the impression that one could not stop a Stallion from paternity visits to their offspring unless a case could be made that the foal would be in danger somehow?” The Lunar Princess hunched over and stared hard at Berry, who just shrugged and made a sad smile again.

“Under Equestrian law, you’d be right, but in Mulexico? The law plays fast and loose down there, depending upon who is supplying the salt to whom or who has a razor-blade against their balls. While we were together, there was this really gloomy Mare that kept trying to get poor Paloma to pay attention only to her, but he wouldn’t touch her with a ten-foot pole because she was way, waaaaay too fond of her salt, if you get my meaning. But sometime after I’d left, he’d gotten really drunk and without a wingmare to watch his back, she apparently jumped him and got what she wanted, which was unfortunate since she just happened to be a niece to one of the cartel-bosses who had been planning on marrying her off to one of his lieutenants.” Berry explained, picking up her glass with one hoof and downing it with a swift, smooth upward movement of her head before flipping the glass upside down and tapping it down onto the bar. “Paloma had to talk the fastest he’s ever done to get out of that with all his pieces still attached, but he managed it in the end.”

“By the Mother, my sister has informed me of the so-called Salt-Lords of Mulexico. My sympathies to your paramour, Berry.” Luna whispered softly, while Twilight’s eyes just bulged in shock.

“Eh, my Paloma will be fine. Like I said, he mixes a mean cocktail, and apparently he smoothed things over cartel-boss and the lieutenant with a few long island iced teas.” The bar-made said breezily, waving a hoof at Luna to dismiss the sympathy. “As far as his last letter claims, the crazy Mare who got him into this mess is long-gone, something about tainted salt-licks and getting caught dipping into the Cartel’s private supplies, and he’s keeping his kids fed, sheltered and out of the Cartel's salt-business with the money he makes as a bartender in one of their bars. In a couple of years, we’re planning on having the eldest come up and stay with me to start his schooling in Ponyville, and once things are set up, Paloma and the rest of the kids should be able to slip past the border and make their way up into Equestria.”

“…You do realize you just admitted to planning to pony-smuggle Ponies across one of our worst borders, second only to the Gryphonia/Equestria border in terms of political tensions and skirmishes? To two Princesses of Equestria, no less?” Luna’s face was an expression of stoic concern, but her tone was one of mirth.

“Oh please, you know as well as I do that everybody, pony or otherwise, that flees Mulexico gets across the border into Equestrian territory and immediately heads for the nearest Border Guard outpost to turn themselves in and get the paperwork started. Your sister’s stance on immigration from ‘troubled’ countries is legendary, so long as they make themselves known to her Border Guards, and Mulexico’s government is more interested in keeping the cartels from tearing the country apart over who controls the salt-trade than they are about their poorer citizens fleeing the country.” Berry scoffed, waving her hoof at Luna again with a broad grin spreading across her muzzle. “Paloma is planning on leveraging his parentage of Piña as grounds to keep himself and his children in Equestria, and I fully intend to support his claim every step of the way in the immigration courts. Odds are in our favour that by this time, five years from now, I’m going to have a family so big helping me run this place I might actually give the Apples’ a run for their money.”

“Now, Twilight, you ready for your first drink?”

Twilight looked at the Mare before her, a Mare whose life had more twists and heartaches than Twilight had ever considered possible, then at the glass in her hooves, then around the small, homey bar, polished to a loving shine by many elbows and that same Mare before her. A Mare she barely knew except from a few pleasant conversations when they’d met in the markets, or the stories Rarity and the other girls had told her.

A Mare who was nothing at all like she had imagined, a fact which made Twilight burn with shame and consternation. How could she have imagined everypony lived a life like hers, with loving parents, a fairy-tale childhood and a charmed life leading up to … the confusing morass of contradictions her life had become these days?

Twilight tipped the glass to her lips, then tilted her head back in one jerky movement, trying to imitate Berry Punch, and was only partially successful, although to her credit Twilight did manage to pour most of the alcohol down her throat, only coughing and spluttering for a minute or so.

“So?”

“Indeed, Twilight, how was it?”

“Ponies do this for fun? It was fine, except for the part where it touched the roof of my mouth, but could I try something a little less … uh, how about something I can drink slowly and enjoy?” Twilight spluttered, wiping tears from her eyes.

“I think I’ve got just the thing. Wash your mouth out with some water, and then I’m going to introduce you to some friends of mine. They go by the name of Jack, Jim and Johnnie and Tia Maria.” Berry smirked, offering a tall pitcher of iced water that she had somehow fetched while Twilight had tried to not die from the burning in her mouth and throat.

“Perchance, good barmare, does anypony still stock mead these days?” Luna asked, a plaintive note in her voice.

“Huh … you know, I think I’ve got a bottle of great black-mead somewhere out back, been resting for about six or seven years now I think.” After a few moments of thought, Berry answered, and was nearly strangled when Luna lunged across the bar and hugged her. “Whoa, easy girl!”

“Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! First, we shall let Twilight taste the divine nectar that is aged mead, then we see what she makes of this era’s offerings!” Luna squealed, while Berry chuckled and gave the delighted demi-god a series of understanding pats on the back and slowly peeled Luna’s hooves off her neck. “You must tell me who made it, I must commission more to be made!”

“Uh, Luna, what exactly did Berry mean by ‘great’ black-mead?” Twilight whispered as Berry staggered off out the back to fetch the bottle, working a newly-acquired crick out of her neck along the way, the newest Princess rolling her eyes as Luna rocked back and forth on her barstool, tittering with glee.

“When one speaks of a ‘great’ mead, it is a variety of mead made to age over time, much like some types of wine. And a ‘black’ mead is made with blueberries or black currants, which is where the name comes from.” Luna babbled, wrapping a wing around Twilight and dragging her upright, her excitement infectious even in Twilight’s current state. “Truly, I feared I would have to start making my own mead! I have a recipe for a wonderful pineapple melomel, err, a mead made with fruit, just gathering dust in my room, and my sister will not allow me to make a Royal Distillery! Fie, she just prefers her ales, but I prefer sweeter nectar than that bitter swill of hers!”

“Well, three years with Pinkie will give anyone a sweet tooth … or diabetes. So long as it doesn’t make me feel like I’m gargling acid, I’ll try this ‘great mead’.”

“Oh trust me, Twilight, you will not regret this!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dayum girl, you can afford all of this on a cloud-technician’s wages?” Rainbow blushed and gave a sheepish grin as Spitfire walked around the spare bedroom, having been given the ‘grand tour’ of Rainbow’s cloud-mansion a few minutes earlier. “Seriously? I don’t think my house is this big, and I’m Captain of the Wonderbolts.”

“Eh, technically there’s no laws about using clouds that form over the Everfree Forest for building material, even if we’re not allowed to use them for drinking water without heavy filtration.” The rainbow-maned Pegasus pointed out, leading the Wonderbolt out of the room and back to the entertainment room, or the ‘dash pit’ as Spitfire had called it with a teasing grin, where Wonderbolt memorabilia and other trophies lined the walls and a huge television hung off the largest wall. “And I kind of get a reward every time the girls and I go save the world, so with Twilight’s help, I invested the bits we got for sealing Discord back up, and I got some sponsorship deals when I first got the Element of Loyalty, so I’m … not hurting for bits.”

“Well we’ll have to talk about those sponsorships when you become an official Wonderbolt, we’re a bit strict about who can and cannot monetize off our fame, but still, nice work rookie.” Spitfire gave a short laugh as she walked along one wall, looking at the photographs with a small smirk on her muzzle. “Lots of photos with you and the farm-mare here? Anything I should know about?”

“AJ? Ah, no, we’re occasionally … close, that’s all. She’s married to her farm, I’m always striving to be Wonderbolts material, we hashed it out years ago that what we want personally isn’t going to work out if we ever went for being more than friends.” Rainbow explained, blushing a little at how easily the words came out to Spitfire. A part of her just wanted so desperately to get the other Mare’s approval, another part of Rainbow felt she had to make sure that Spitfire had no illusions about how dedicated to the Wonderbolts Rainbow actually was.

And another part was still reeling over the thought that her idol, Spitfire, was an honest-to-Faust Royal Agent. She hadn’t felt this excited and foalish since she learned Daring Do was the real-life alter-ego of A.K. Yearling, and it was taking all of Rainbow’s control, of which she was never exactly blessed with, to not blurt out something embarrassing. A part of her mind that was spending almost as much energy squealing over Spitfire’s revealed status as it was trying to suppress the knowledge that Derpy and Bulk Biceps were also Royal Agents …

“Hey, Rainbow?” Spitfire’s voice broke Rainbow’s concentration, the yellow-coated Pegasus stopping at one particular photo, the good humour missing from her voice. “Sorry, I think I lost you for a minute or two there, but who is this little foal? The orange one with the purple mane?”

“Foal? Oh, that’s Scootaloo.” Rainbow explained, hobbling over to the photo and picking it up with the primary feathers of her wing, smiling warmly at the picture of herself and Scootaloo, wearing matching helmets, seated in a billy-cart at the top of a steep hill. “She’s a cool kid. Don’t let the stubby little wings fool you, even if she can’t fly, the kid has got the heart of a champion.”

“She so old … I mean, she can’t fly?” Spitfire’s voice sounded … mechanical as the Pegasus picked up the picture-frame with a hoof and stared at the picture, her expression inscrutable. “Does she … does Scootaloo live in Ponyville?”

“Huh? Yeah, Scoots is a local, although her parents do a lot of work out of town, they’re surveyors so they’re always on the go but they make sure she’s got enough bits for food and her school-fees. And she’s close friends with Apple Bloom, Applejack’s little sister, and Sweetie Belle, Rarity’s little sister. You actually missed her earlier, she was in the library having a shower after getting nabbed by Pinkie Pie when you came into the library.” Rainbow said, starting to laugh before she took a closer look at Spitfire’s face, her laughter dying slowly and awkwardly on the compressed cloud-matter floor. “Spitfire?”

“Oh …” The other Mare mumbled, her hoof and the picture frame it held trembling for a few moments before she put the picture back in place. “So … she’s happy?”

“Well, she’s angsty about not having a Cutie Mark at her age and still determined to figure out why she can’t fly properly, but she’s about as happy as a young filly can get. But after getting caught up in Rarity’s mess last night, I won’t lie, Spitfire, I’m feeling all kinds of nervous about Scoots.” Rainbow sighed heavily and walked up next to Spitfire, picking up the picture frame and smiling fondly at the grinning orange-coated filly in the billy-cart with her. “I’d be willing to bet my last bit that Scootaloo got all tangled up with Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle last night, and that’s … not a good place for a young mare to be, especially not one with all the gruff Scootaloo is dealing with already. Once we get you settled, and Twilight’s had a chance to de-magic whatever the Crusaders did to themselves last night, I gotta figure out the best time to sit Scoots down and give her the sex-talk.”

“I might give you a hoof with that.” Spitfire said, sounding oddly flat still as she walked away and sat down on a couch-shaped piece of cloud, her expression one of frustration. “Have you ever actually met her parents?”

“Huh? No, they’re always away at work, surveying the borders for months on end.” The blue Pegasus frowned as she thought on that. Scootaloo had said they were surveyors charged with keeping the borders of Equestria clearly marked on the maps, but even the most hard-working Pony got leave to be with their families. Did they just come back to town, rest, and then go back to work? “I think they’ve gotta be Earth Ponies, or maybe Unicorns. I had to teach Scootaloo how to preen her wings after I met her, and boy was that awkward. Poor kid wanted to fly so desperately, and since I was the best flyer in town …”

“So she fixated on you, because she thought maybe you could teach her how to fly.” Spitfire sighed and leaned her head against the back of the couch. “But that never struck you as odd? Why would parents not learn how to preen their child’s wings, even if they weren’t of the same tribe?”

“Do you think that’s why Scootaloo can’t fly? Her wings got stunted somehow, or maybe injured, because her parents didn’t know how to take care of them? I mean, look at Bulk Biceps! Maybe they got broken and reset badly or something?”

“You mean Snowflake, and no, he’s a … special case. Partial pygmyism syndrome, specifically his wings and hooves. I … has anyone actually tested this filly? For … anything?” Spitfire pointed a hoof at the offending frame, a hoof that trembled. “She’s just been stuck here, not able to fly, not able to be a Pegasus, and nobody has done anything to help her fly?”

“Well, I give her lessons on how to maintain her wings and exercise her flight-muscles, but no parents around to sign the forms means no tests. I know Cherilee, the town’s teacher, has a Tartarus of a time getting signatures from Scootaloo's parents.” Shrugging as best she could with one foreleg in a sling, Rainbow tried to scoot away from Spitfire with mixed success, since Spitfire followed Rainbow over with a look somewhere between outrage and horror.

“Seriously, her parents are never home, why did you never check up on her at her house? Is she eating right, does anyone take care of cleaning the house while her parents are away, is she getting any help with her homework? Does anyone take care of this filly or is she all but abandoned?”

“I … was asked not to! Scootaloo said her parents were private ponies!” Rainbow stammered and held her uninjured hoof in-front of her face to ward of Spitfire’s hoof, which was now firmly pointed at her. “There’s this thing called ‘right of entry’, and I’m not a Guardspony. If an adult doesn’t invite me onto the property, I’d be technically trespassing, and you know the Wonderbolts wouldn’t touch recruits with criminal records, no matter how small!”

“She’s alone and you … gah!” Yelling in frustration, Spitfire threw herself up off the couch and began stalking around the room. “Seriously? SERIOUSLY?”

“Spit … Captain Spitfire, I get this isn’t the best situation for a young Mare like Scootaloo, but why has this gotten you so worked up?”

“Because I … I had a foal, Rainbow. I wouldn’t have been much older than this ‘Scootaloo’ of yours when I fell pregnant, on my first heat no-less, and you know the Wonderbolts won’t allow anypony to join if they’ve got dependants, or if, like you said, they’ve got a criminal record.” Spitfire answered after several tense moments, staring rigidly at the picture with eyes lost in the past. “My family is Nobility, we can even trace our heritage back to Commander Hurricane. They had my post all picked out for me before I even finished Flight-School, and when I couldn’t hide the bulge anymore, well … I was put into isolation for the remainder of my pregnancy.”

“Isolation, Rainbow. Imagine you’re locked up in a cell, a lovely cell, but a cell nonetheless, with nobody to talk to but a doctor and nurse who say nothing to you no matter how much you beg or plead, just give you shots of vitamins, make sure you haven’t miscarried and then lock you away again. All perfectly legal considering my aunt had the local Guards convinced I had suffered a ‘nervous breakdown’ during my first heat and needed to be kept under supervision till my mind healed, and since the Stallion who’d jumped me was an up-and-coming member of the family to begin with, the entire family went along with what she was saying so I had no way to convince anypony I was being railroaded.”

“So when I’m finally ready to pop after months of isolation and almost out of my mind from the double-whammy of the roller-coaster of pregnancy hormones and being just about broken from getting cut off from everypony around me, the doctor and nurse come in, get me to sign a document they say will get me out of that damn room, strap me down and let me just about kill myself giving birth. The next thing I know, the doctor tells me it’s a filly, then my foal is swaddled up before I can even hold her once and taken away by the nurse as my aunt saunters in and tells me I’ve got three days to get myself ready for my role as a Wonderbolt Trainee and to not fail the family again. The only information I’ve ever got out of the evil bitch in the past fifteen years was that my ‘mistake’ was safe, and the piece of paper I’d signed was my waiving my rights as the filly’s mother to my aunt.”

“So maybe now you can understand when I start to freak the buck out when somepony I thought had her head on straight tells me she’s a close confidant of a filly who is all but raising herself, has some sort of condition that means she can’t fly and it’s just … there? No worries? Not your problem?” Spitfire turned around and gave Rainbow a withering look, which quickly turned into one of confusion at the slack-jawed, wide-eyed expression on the blue Pegasus’s face. “Rainbow? I swear to Faust, Mare, if I just bared my soul to you for some crude joke to come out of your muzzle …”

“Pregnant?” Rainbow whispered, slowly blinking as Spitfire trotted over and tapped the blue Pegasus on the muzzle. “Why … but how …”

“Trainee, if I have to explain the birds and the bees to you …”

“No, I mean, surely somepony must have asked before …”

“I’m Spitfire of the Windstorms, a branch-family of the Hurricanes themselves, flames of Tartarus, we’re so closely intermarried we all but are the Hurricanes, so two guesses what happens in Cloudsdale when somebody asks awkward questions about my family. The Wonderbolts uniforms are designed to mask small ‘defects’ like scars … or stretch-marks, so unless I’ve got somebody’s face right under my haunches, nopony gets to see them.” Sighing heavily, Spitfire sat herself down next Rainbow and hooked a forelimb around the other Mare’s neck. “And the only ones who got to see the marks were either too afraid to get blacklisted by one of the most powerful Noble families in Equestria, or already knew about my situation and thought my aunt was justified in protecting the family’s ‘honour’.”

“And that brings me a point I was … kind of hoping to broach a bit more tactfully over the coming weeks. Soarin’ and I didn’t so much volunteer to come out here as we spent every political favour and every drop of influence we had to get away from the Wonderbolts for this assignment. I can’t speak for Soarin’s reasons, but I’m here primarily to see about getting Twilight friggin’ Sparkle to use that big brain of hers, and all of that immaculate political clout that Celestia’s favour affords her, to find my baby for me.”

“But if you had your foal at … sixteen? Seventeen? And you’ve been a Wonderbolt for the past fifteen years … wouldn’t that mean your foal is almost fully grown now?” Rainbow whispered, snaking a hoof around Spitfire’s middle as she felt the other Mare begin to shake and shudder. “Uh … I mean …”

“I know, Rainbow. She’s probably already fully grown now, probably has a loving family, a sweetheart of her own, a life of her own by this stage.” Spitfire sniffled, an act that made Rainbow hug her tighter in reflex as the Pegasus’s brain had yet another hiccup at the thought of Spitfire, Spitfire of all Ponies, sniffling. “But I have to know she’s okay, that my li-little filly got a good home and a good life. I lie awake at night sometimes and have panic-attacks about what my bitch of an aunt might have done, and I want …”

“Oh Faust, Rainbow, I’m not expecting a fairy-tale ending. Logically, I know, she’s going to go ‘Oh, so you gave me up. Why?’ and then I have to try and explain everything to a young Mare who is going to see me either as the heartless whorse who gave her up to pursue my career, or some delusional nutjob celebrity trying to come up with excuses for not being there for her. But I have to know.” Spitfire stopped and took several deep, shuddering breaths before continuing. “I’ve spent fifteen years working my way up the Wonderbolts to become the Captain, pretending to be the good little girl so the Windstorms wouldn’t be aware of what I was doing under their noses, and working with the Royal Agents to get the evidence of bribery, fraud and illegal deals needed to lock away such old and powerful familes, and we’ve had to move slowly, carefully to avoid making them aware of what we’ve been doing.”

“Of course I’ll help!” The words left Rainbow’s mouth before her brain could even react, and the way Spitfire’s all but broke Rainbow’s ribs in a hug as the yellow-coated Mare burst into tears, sobbing into Rainbow’s mane, smothered all hope of the Element of Loyalty backing out with some shreds of grace.

Twilight won’t object, right? Rainbow thought nervously as she stroked Spitfire’s mane with her remaining forelimb. I mean, what else can she be doing right now that’s more important than this?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight found, to both her and Luna’s delight, that she quite enjoyed mead. The Holy Quadrology of Jack, Jim, Johnny and Tia Maria had also been a pleasant experience, as had a selection of cocktails, mixer-drinks and even some vodka that had followed them, leaving Twilight pleasantly numb from nose to tail, and all her concerns seemed so unimportant, so far away …

Twilight wasn’t sure why Berry Punch insisted that Twilight be taken home when she had asked if the bar-mare had any water-balloons. There hadn’t been anypony else in the bar even an hour or so after Twilight and Luna had burst in to hide from the panicking paparazzi, so Twilight was just going to go outside and share the magic of friendship and alcohol with the reporters via some water-balloons until they decided to be her friends and stop being snoopy-snippy-spoilsport-spy ponies.

And then Luna had grabbed Twilight, thanked Berry Punch and taken them out a window and straight up into the sky …

If only Luna would just let her teleport back to the Library, but her marefriend had steadfastly refused, insisting on carrying Twilight underneath her, which Twilight found simply adorable, attempting to cuddle Luna back, but gravity seemed to keep trying to pull her down to the ground no matter how nicely she asked.

And despite how much she told Luna it was okay, she was sure she’d Ascended already and the long drop would mean nothing because Twilight could just teleport away from the ground and back into her hooves, that just made Luna clutch Twilight tighter and mutter to herself, something about ‘lightweights’. So Twilight thanked Luna for complimenting her about her dieting. Which simply made Luna utter an adorable noise and remove one hoof from Twilight’s shoulders to rub at her temples.

“Huh-hey … heeeeeeeeey Luna. How ‘bout we jus’ crash oooon a cloud fer a biiit? M’light, buh yuuuuuh been flah-ehn fer a whiiiiile.”

“It’s been five minutes, Twilight, and we’re as far up in the air as I can manage without your lungs imploding from the lack of oxygen so the reporters can’t see Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Drunken Shenanigans.”

“M’Phreen-ceeess ohv Fhran’sheep!”

“You were about to beer-bomb every Pony with a camera in town until they agreed to be your friends.”

“They jush need this wunnaful aaaahl-co-hole, an’ we can aaaaaall be fhrans!”

“Dear sweet Faust’s left plot-cheek. I think the first part of your training as a Princess will include learning to either handle your booze, or figuring out ways to avoid it entirely.” Luna muttered, aiming them down in the general direction of Ponyville’s library, her horn flickering with dark-blue magic as Luna began scooping cloud-matter towards them, slowing down as she did so as to keep the cloud-matter intact as the pair began a slow descent towards Twilight’s home.

“Dun you mean ‘hoof’my bhoose? ‘Cause we dun haf haaandsh, we haf hooooves!”

“Figure of speech, Twilight, figure of speech.” The larger Alicorn said softly, the wisps of cloud-matter slowly swirling around them, growing thicker with each revolution as the entangled Princesses, beginning to form a thick cocoon. “Besides, I think you need a little more training in spacing your drinks out or you will end up … well, like you are now.”

Twilight tried to explain she most certainly knew how to handle her liquor, but her mouth betrayed her, giving vent to a lip-rippling burp instead, much to Luna’s disgusted amusement.

“FHRAN’SHEEP ISH A DEEP AN’ MISTER … MUSHTURIOUS … STRANGE THING!” Twilight protested, trying to crawl up to look into Luna’s eyes to make her point, but Luna simply grabbed her tighter and flew faster towards the library, muttering under her breath. “Uuuugh, Wuna, stop grabbin’ me so haaa … WHUUUUUUUUUEY!”

“Huey? Where is Hu-OH MY ME, THAT IS DISGUSTING!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Carrot Top, are you sure this is wise? We’re talking Princess Twilight Sparkle here, the darling of the nation, international super-hero, favored student of Princess Celestia?”

“Please, I have everything under control.” Carrot Top scoffed, turning to give her friends a confident smile as they trotted out to her place to plan for their next move. “There is nothing on Equuis that that spoiled purple witch can do that can bring me down!”

As if to punctuate her statement, the clouds above parted for a brief moment, a beam of golden light illuminating Carrot Top for several seconds before something vile dropped from the sky, plastering Carrot Top, her sixteen hard-won signatures and those closest to her in a horrific mixture of alcohol and what appeared to be diced carrots.

In the following seconds, eyes met, mouths opened in silent horror before the band dispersed, rolling on the grass to try and scrape whatever vile substance they had been bombed with out of their fur, while Carrot Top simply stood there, staring cross-eyed at a familiar-looking cube of orange mush slowly sliding down her muzzle to the tip of her nose.

It looked like it might once have been a carrot, but she couldn’t be sure. Her stomach roiled at the mere thought of other forms of tests, and her eyes watered both at the smell and the thought that somewhere, somehow, some filthy, flighty Pegasus had wasted a precious carrot.

“Oh that does it! I’m going home to have a shower!” One pony shouted angrily, getting to her hooves and all but running away, followed swiftly by the other Ponies, leaving Carrot Top alone to trudge back to her small farmhouse to bathe … and to add another insult to her beloved vegetable to her Big Book of Grudges.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sir Spike?” Luna said as loudly as she dared, fearing that Twilight would wake up and proceed to burst into drunken singing, or trying to adorably snuggle her in the way drunks do, or worse still, projectile-vomit like the world’s most disgusting water-cannon.

Sneaking into her marefriend’s own home via the back door, cocooned with the comatose Twilight in a mass of clouds to prevent the paparazzi that might be staking out the library and entering the living tree while keeping the clouds outside without allowing any part of herself or Twilight to become visible had been … taxing. Emotionally and otherwise. And the constant gurgling from Twilight’s stomach had only increased her anxiety!

Faust as her witness, where had all of it come from? Luna was certain Twilight could not have possibly contained half of the liquids that had blasted from her mouth like an unholy stream of nope, yet the volume had been … had been …

Luna put a hoof to her mouth and resolutely swallowed the bile that rose up, gagging slightly and wincing as her lack of grip, and concentration, allowed Twilight to slip down and bang her head on the wooden floor.

“M’head …” Twilight whimpered, slipping completely from Luna’s grasp to land with a thud on the floor, cradling her head between her forehooves. “Wuna? We home?”

“Yes, Twilight, we’re home. I think that, in future, you’re not allowed to drink alcohol. Hard cider at best. Especially if we’re flying. From the screaming, I think you might have gotten somepony.”

“Wuh-would expwhain why m’mouth tastes … yikky.” Twilight whimpered, needing Luna’s aid to get back onto her hooves before the two Alicorns risked tackling the stairs, a formidable feat given that Twilight had apparently forgotten how to move her front hooves and back hooves at the same time, and when Luna tried to pick Twilight up in her telekinesis, the purple Alicorn nearly hurled from the pressure on her stomach.

“Mmmph. Let’s get you into the shower, use some of that mouthwash, and then tuck you into bed.” Luna whispered softly, knowing full well that Twilight’s head would likely be as fragile as a chicken’s egg after such an ordeal as the two snuck up the stairs and came face to face, or face to mask, with Spike, Trixie and the Cutiemark Crusaders.

Twilight, mercifully, was too blasted still by her first battle with the booze to probably appreciate the absurdity of the scene before her, but Luna was not so blessed, and thus found herself asking without thinking.

“Sir Spike? Why are you and the rest of the household wearing gas-masks and rubber gloves, and why do you all smell of bleach and baking soda?”

“Because the Crusaders ruin everything for me. Also the bathroom has been disinfected. Also, Twilight owes me a new bath-tub, because I am never washing myself in the one we've got ever again.” Spike snapped, pulling his mask off and shooting a positively filthy look at the Crusaders, who lowered their heads in shame, their features obscured by the black rubber masks and thick coke-bottle lenses of the eye-pieces, while Trixie tittered behind hers. “Where do I put the Cutiemark Crusader Fetish Destroyers and the Terrible Trixie?”

“Cutiemark Crusader … Fetlock Deployers?” Twilight mumbled in confusion, swaying on her hooves and looking decidedly greener by the second.

“Oh by the Mother Earth, I do not need this right now. Spike, put them into the spare room, and Crusaders, I expect you to go to sleep. Tomorrow, when Twilight is recovered, she will try to help you with … whatever you’ve done to yourselves, but right now is not a good idea. Get some sleep, read some books, whatever you do just be quiet.” Luna hissed, pushing past the four youths and one adult Ma ... hermaphro ... Pony of dubious gender, to get Twilight to the bathroom, nose crinkling at the stringent smells that assaulted her as the pair of Alicorns entered the room. She had been in operating theatres that hadn’t been cleaned half as thoroughly as this bathroom …

“Buh … help Spike …” Twilight stammered as Luna half-carried, half-led Twilight over to the shower and began fiddling with the controls, Luna grimacing as the smaller Alicorn began to make gagging noises.

“I am fairly certain Sir Spike can handle three young Mares, even if they are the Cutiemark Crusaders.” Luna replied sternly, pulling the new shower-head down to her eye-level and inspecting it with both her eyes and her magics, finding only residue of cleaning agents that she began to wash off with telekineticly-manipulated globs of water until she felt it was safe enough to start washing Twilight’s head, neck and mane. “Now if you feel sick, Twilight, don’t try to hold it in. Just let it out, or you’ll be throwing up for the rest of the day.”

“B-buh I’m fhine!” Twilight whined even as her stomach began to flex and her head drooped. “I jus’ … whaaaalph …”

“And this, Twilight, is incontrovertible proof that I love you.” The Lunar Princess said to herself as she held Twilight’s mane back while the other Alicorn began to retch into the drain at the end of the shower-recess

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So … uhm, sorry?”

“Not interested in your apologies, Scootaloo. You guys have just ruined a full quarter of my Neighponese collection forever. I’m going to have to either burn them, or sell them to Snips and Snails for a fraction of what it cost me to get them imported.” Spike muttered darkly as he hustled the Crusaders into the guest room, eying the spare bed with understandable concern given the … scene … he had walked into a few hours before.

Cleaning the bathroom, even with Trixie’s help, had been an agonizing foray into a domain Spike had felt he would maybe have enjoyed … if not for the fact it involved three of his closest friends, and in an intimate fashion he just felt far too awkward to even think about right now.

“Uhm … Spike, if Trixie may, you leave this to me. Trixie is … intimately familiar with the trials these Ponies are suffering from right now, and you could probably do with some privacy to … recover.” Trixie pointed out, using her magic to ease the gloves off her limbs, her voice slightly distorted by the mask she still wore.

“Ugh, that’s right, you’re also …” Spike muttered, giving Trixie an appraising look as she pulled her mask off with magic, her new golden torc proof that she was under supervision of beings more able to stop her than a juvenile dragon with no wings or claws. “Would you mind? I’ve kind of had enough emotional body-blows today without having to try to figure out how I’m going to deal with three of my best friends deciding to repaint my bathroom with semen.”

The room was dead silent for close to a minute, Trixie’s eyebrows almost merging with her mane, the Crusaders squeaking and throwing themselves under the covers of the bed in shame and Spike giving a snort of annoyance at their shenanigans.

“No, seriously. You three have ruined that particular fetish for me for life. If I hadn’t been reading that Power Ponies comic when I’d walked into the bathroom, you’d have gotten me in the mouth. As it is, my eyes still sting.” The young Drake scowled at the three pairs of eyes that stared at him from under the blankets. “We’re all lucky I didn’t panic and start shooting flames back at you, or Princess Celestia would have been giving her speech to all of Equestria and been blindsided by a rain of your spooge, courtesy of my fire-magic. Ponies have been thrown into Horseshoe Bay for far less.”

“Please don’t tell anypony.” Sweetie whined, extending a hoof from under the covers towards him, and Spike sighed gustily, stumped over and shook it once, then found himself doing the same again to the other two Crusaders before he was grabbed and dragged closer by the three mortified Crusaders and hugged tightly.

“On the plus side, at least this time you guys weren’t stuck together with tree sap this time.” Spike offered, feeling a twinge of guilt. It wasn't the Crusaders' fault, technically, what with whatever traces of the aphrodisiacs running through their bodies still ...

“Heh … that’s true Spike. An’ thanks. Things’re … well, weird right now, an’ we’re countin’ on Twilight to help us out here.” Applebloom whispered softly, her breath hot against Spike’s ear-frills as the young Drake realized he was being hugged by three very attractive young Mares whom he had recently helped clean up the evidence they were very sexually active right now.

“N-n-no worries.” The young Drake stammered, patting the limbs that held him in place and trying to pull away with his dignity intact, walking stiff-legged out of the room as his subconscious started pelting his mind’s eye with imagery that at once intrigued and horrified him. “Friends don’t gossip about friends, so y-you guys just relax, get some sleep, I’ll make a late lunch for us all, promise.”

The Crusaders watched Spike’s awkward, mechanical retreat with confusion, while Trixie held a hoof to her muzzle and fought the urge to giggle.

“Now, children, the Understanding and Sympathetic Trixie wishes to speak to you about Weeaboo’s Curse.”

“The who-what-now?”

“Weeaboo … hey, that spell! Yeah, it was written by a Unicorn called Weeaboo, right Sweetie?”

“That’s right! But Weeaboo called it a ‘Spear Maiden’ spell!”

“Mmmm, Trixie’s distant ancestors had the spell cast upon them many, many generations ago, and when one came to Equestria, they passed it in turn to the native Ponies of this land.” Trixie explained slowly, seating herself on the thick carpet that dominated the floor of the small room as the Crusaders inched out from under the blankets. “Trixie shares your current condition, and as Trixie is determined to prove she is trying to be a good and loyal friend to the citizens of Ponyville, she will talk you through what you are going through right now.”

“Uh, fairly sure sex-ed with Cherilee prepared us for ‘dangle goes in the ding’-mrphth!” Scootaloo’s grumbled refusal was cut short when Apple Bloom reached for a pillow and whacked her friend in the face with it.

“Ssssh! A-ain’t nothin’ wrong with us, miss Trixie!” The young farm-mare gave the biggest, falsest smile Trixie had ever seen, coupled with the boldest lie Trixie had heard in years.

“So you three did not have penises when I came up the stairs to ask why Spike was screaming about ‘my fetishes’, and we did not spend two hours cleaning semen off the walls, the shower-curtains, the ceiling, the underside of the sink …”

“Okay, okay, so we … might have been affected by a spell from a certain scroll we might have borrowed from Applejack, who might have been looking after something for Twilight.” Sweetie Belle snapped, giving Trixie a hot, frustrated look as Apple Bloom and Scootaloo withdrew under the blankets again and began to bicker softly. “But we got weeks of talks from miss Cherilee about Colts and Fillies. We just need to get some pills from the pharmacy, and we’ll be in the clear.”

“You do realize the pills only make it unlikely for Ponies to conceive, yes? They are not a perfect protection against unwanted pregnancy.”

Silence and three widening pairs of eyes greeted Trixie’s words.

“Trixie has been made aware you are currently suffering the side-effects of a false estrus as well as the alterations to your bodies from a spell designed to help a hoof-ful of Ponies repopulate their people.” Trixie continued, shaking her head in mock-annoyance. “Trixie has studied the spell many, many times over her long career on the road, hoping to find a cure for her family’s condition, and Trixie is well aware that the ... uhm ... condition you are suffering from right now greatly boosts the sex-drive and fertility of those who must endure it. Mere pills alone will not save you from falling pregnant to each other!”

“Cutiemark Crusader Single Mothers …” One of the two Crusaders under the blankets whimpered, and Sweetie Belle’s angry expression crumpled into frustration and alarm.

“Trixie remembers being your age with her friends, and Trixie could bore you rigid with tales of her youth.” The blue Unicorn stressed the word loudly, unable to stop a giggle as Sweetie went bright red and disappeared under the covers with her friends. They were so cute! “But Trixie also remembers several close calls as well. So, Trixie the Helpful and Understanding will teach Sweetie Belle the strongest contraception spell she knows, and then the receipe for the herbal tea that she drinks after every … encounter … to protect herself.”

A trio of embarrassed ‘meeps’ were her only response, but three pairs of eyes stared at her seemed a bit more hopeful than they had been a few minutes ago.

Or maybe it was just her imagination.

“How, on to less … dramatic matters. Trixie wishes to know, exactly at that, how well any of you know how to keep their new parts hygienic?” The blue Unicorn asked, sighing as three heads emerged from under the blankets, shared nervous glances with each other before shaking side to side in wordless gestures of ‘no’. “Very well then. Trixie will give you a run-down on how to remain clean and healthy … down there. Trust that Trixie knows all too well how aggravating swamp-crotch can be when one has double the crotch to maintain.”

Chapter 56

CHAPTER 56

“Rosebush.”

“Cadence.”

“Are you two seriously doing this again?” Shining Armor sighed heavily, his normally calm temper frayed after having to escort Cadence, complete with transparent barrier-shield spell over them and the entire group from the Crystal Empire, through Canterlot all the way up to the castle itself.

The trip had taken them through what appeared to be the entire population of reporters in the known world, however. Minotaurs, Diamond Dogs, Zebras, Ponies of all stripes, even a handful of Yaks, Griffons and an overly-excitable Orc that had shoved everything from cameras and microphones to a contract for an exclusive interview that might have been an entire tree at one point in its life against the barrier. The flashes alone from the cameras had given him the mother of all headaches.

And now Cadence and Rosebush were squaring off again over what was basically a pointless reason as far as he could see. They’d been having this argument ever since they’d met, as far as Shining was aware.

The two Mares turned and gave him that “You will suffer for this later.” look that all stallions learned to pick up on relatively quickly after encountering the fairer sex as something other than playmates and turned back to each other smoothly, their expressions still blank masks of faux-pleasantness as Shining shot a look to the heavens along with a silent prayer for the emotional strength to get through the day.

“So where are you keeping the Changeling Queen? The dungeons, I would hope?”

“That’s a need-to-know basis, Princess Cadence, and you don’t need to know.”

“Come now, Rosebush, we’ve been friends for years, surely you can tell me. I still technically am in-line for the throne, after all.”

“And I am telling you, again, Princess Cadence, that one of the two Diarchs of the realm have given me explicit instructions that you are to be kept as far from our new … diplomat and her staff as equinely possible.”

“Oh, and after all the help I gave you trying to woo your beau …”

“Funny you should mention that, he seems to have been seduced by a pink succubi with delusions of grandeur right before I could make my move. How very strange …”

“Maybe she was just better suited for him? Not every little school-filly crush is destined to bloom into a romance, Rosebush.”

“Or maybe the bitch just abused her position to ensure I was never able to make my move in the first place? She is a cunning, shallow vixen after all.”

“At the risk of being banished to the profoundly uncomfortable crystalline surface of the Royal Couch, can you two reel it in and save it for later? The last thing anypony needs is the newspapers running a story on the Captain of the Royal Guard and the Crystal Princess getting into a brawl on the front-steps of Canterlot Castle.” Shining lowered his eyebrows and glared right back at the two Mares as they turned matching, seething looks towards him. “Rosebush, you’re well aware your orders from Celestia have precedence over anything any junior Princesses can issue, just ignore Cadence’s request and move on, you’re the Captain of the Castle Guard and this kind of behaviour is unworthy of the position. And Cadence? Nobody wants that Faust-damned bug flattened more than me, we’ve both spent months in therapy trying to get over what she did to us, but needling Celestia’s right hoof-pony over some sort of stupid feud from when you two were teenagers isn’t going to help us get the Changelings re-banished. So if you two are quite done, shut up and act your age, not your horse-shoe size.”

Shining stood there with all the courage and poker-face training that officer-training had prepared him for as the seething looks turned positively glacial before the two Mares sniffed and turned away from each other, Rosebush walking around to a side-entrance, Cadence walking up the stairs to the grand entrance. It was only after the two had disappeared that Shining allowed himself to let loose a breath he had been holding, and his head sagged down.

“Holy Faust’s left plot-cheek! Captain Shining Armor, that was … amazing. Horrifically self-destructive, but amazing.” Adamant whispered, trotting up to stand next to Shining and snickering a bit as Shining leaned on him for a few moments.

“Yes, well, part of my duties as a husband and a former Royal Captain myself is to ensure the dignity of the Royalty is not besmirched under my watch, and letting Rosebush and Cadence keep at it would do just that.” Shining chuckled in turn as the Crystal and Royal Guards behind him offered their praise … and their condolences. “That said lads, we’ve got to get in there and keep up on our duties, namely keeping my now immensely pissed-off wife from starting a diplomatic incident and more importantly, trying to protect her from any Changelings.”

“Sir!” The Guards all saluted smartly and then rushed the doors to take up escort positions around Cadence inside the building, while Shining stayed outside for a little longer.

It felt … good to be home. For all the beauty and splendour of the Crystal Empire, Canterlot felt like home. The white marble, the brisk winds that circled the mountain, the background roar of noise from the city was as familiar and comforting as his father’s hoof on his shoulder.

I just wish we were coming home for something other than Changelings trying to infiltrate the country again.

“Oh don’t be so sour, Shining Armoire!” A voice cackled, and the white-coated Unicorn lifted his head in shock to see Discord, Spirit of Chaos, floating above him on a cloud made of, oddly enough, multi-coloured cotton candy that looked remarkable like Princess Celestia’s mane-colours. “That was the bravest thing I’ve seen in ages! I’ll see if Princess Celestia can give you a medal … and some cushions for that couch!”

“Discord … is there a reason you’re eavesdropping?” Shining asked, ignoring Discord’s attempt at a joke as a cold pit of horror opened up in his belly. Twilight’s letters, along with Celestia’s orders, had painted a picture of a god-like being with reality-manipulating abilities and a disturbing lack of social graces or grasp of causality.

Having Discord decide to ‘cheer up’ Cadence right now with one of his pranks would probably result in his wife attempting to level half the castle to get him back. And which ‘him’ would cop the worst of it was entirely up for debate at this point in time.

“Oh, hardly that, old chum! Just doing my part to help out a friend. You know, Princess Celestia asked me personally to make sure that you and your wife didn’t get close to Queen Bug-Butt. So, fair warning, I am going to push the boundaries of my parole as far as I can on this one, it has been far too long since I got to mess with such important Ponies!” The serpentine chimera chortled, pulling off a chunk of cotton candy and chewing with a big grin on his face, before coughing and spitting the offending treat out of his mouth and into a hedge, his expression now one of alarm. “Baaaghack! Now I know I didn’t mean for that to taste like vanilla …”

“We’re trying to save Equestria from being taken over a third time.” Shining explained calmly, knowing it would infuriate Discord to be spoken to so, and hopefully the Chaos-God would give up a secret or two in the ensuing hissy-fit.

“Oh, I doubt a few score of battered and starving Changelings and their almost-dead Queen could take over a coffee-shop, let alone all of Equestria. Besides …” Discord conjured a piece of sandpaper in his eagle’s claw and pulled his tongue out of his mouth with his lion’s paw and continued to speak normally even as he began sanding his own tongue, complete with sparks flying. “Cellie said I could do whatever I thought I had to keep you and your lovely wife away from the cockroach-queen, so I am going to do just that. Flex all those lovely chaos-muscles that have just been turning to mush over the past few months and get some relief. As annoying as letting old Sun-Butt hold the reins all the time can be, just trust her like you used to, she’s got this one in-hoof.”

“Speaking of which, you’re running late and Cadence is marching right on up to Celestia’s private rooms, so you’d better get a move on. Let me help.”

Before Shining could thank him, or more likely, frantically beg the God to not help, Discord wiggled his eyebrows at Shining, and the Stallion felt himself in the grip of a powerful teleportation spell.

For a brief moment, Shining was in two places at once, fading from sight with the leering face of the Chaos-God filling his field of view, the other place a constantly shifting realm of sounds that he could smell, tastes he could hear, improbable and impossible images bursting into mercifully-short life before his eyes before the sensation of being doubled happened again, and Shining dropped through the air, landing with a muffled grunt on his face.

Where he landed was a more important point, as Shining found himself spread-eagled before a very startled Unicorn who, for some strange reason, seemed immensely unimportant, Princess Celestia … and a Changeling!

“Princess Celestia, auntie, you just have to stop this mad-SHINING!” Cadence said, flinging open the doors, and the two terrified-looking Royal Guards on guard-duty flying with them, before coming upon the scene and shouting in shock. “Honey! Did the Changeling attack you! I knew they couldn’t be trusted!”

“No … Discord …” The prone pony grunted, trying to get air back into his lungs as the room descended into flying hooves and accusations.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Cadence, for the last time, Shining was teleported directly into the room by Discord and Scout has done nothing to anypony in here, barring some unfortunate misunderstandings with Guard Dappled here.” Princess Celestia said loudly and firmly as her magic re-ordered the room, pulled groaning Royal and Crystal Guards back onto their hooves and kept a furiously kicking Cadence levitated up into the air, with thicker bands of golden-coloured solar magic wrapping around Cadence’s barrel to keep her wings from coming into play.

“You cannot be serious! You must be under a spell! Or the Changelings are using pheromones to alter your perceptions! Or you’ve been replaced already!” Cadence hissed, struggling vainly against Celestia’s sorcerous might as Dappled helped the Royal Physician tend to Shining Armor, who had apparently sprained his neck when falling during the teleportation, and Scout peeked out from underneath Princess Celestia’s tail, having apparently decided the best defence against an enraged Immortal was the body of an even more powerful Immortal. “They’re evil! Evil love-sucking monsters! You can’t just let them back into the country and sign a peace treaty! They kidnapped foals, attempted to overthrow the country! THEIR QUEEN NEARLY KILLED YOU IN A MAGICAL DUEL!”

“Chrysalis kidnapped the Cutiemark Crusaders, yes, but she also kept them completely unharmed and from the report Twilight sent me after the fact, the Crusaders were hardly in any danger since the Queen intended to bargain their safe return for Twilight taking over her role as the new Queen of her Hive.” Celestia pointed out, while Scout’s head emerged briefly.

“Our Queen hopes part of her treaty with Hive Equestria will be that the three grublings are kept as far from her person as possible. Especially if they decide they wish to start ‘crusading’.”

“Hrm, yes, tangling with the Cutiemark Crusaders was obviously not one of the Changelings’ finer moments, and if you had ever listened during our lessons together, you would know almost every sentient race on the continent, and a few from beyond that, have tried to enslave Ponykind or take control of the country in the past.” Trying to repress a smile at the Changeling’s words, Celestia levitating Cadence close enough so that larger Alicorn could stare the smaller one straight in the eyes, the solar monarch’s expression flicking back from bemused to annoyed. “Need I remind you that Queen Chrysalis only won because if I had used my full power, the entire assembly of Ponies and Changelings at the wedding, including your husband, sister-in-law and their family would have been incinerated by the backwash of my power. I have taken steps to avoid any future situations where this can be abused, by anyone or anypony, up to and including irrational Alicorns even, by wearing more of my Regalia.”

“And if I may also point out something you should be very familiar with? Alicorn. Immortal. Even at their moment of victory, the Changelings still depended upon surrounding my cocoon with those of other Ponies to prevent my power from tipping the balance back in favour of our nation, ensuring any attempt to free myself would have dire consequences.” Celestia continued, her mane and tail flickering orange and red in places as she spoke, her eyes boring into Cadence’s with an intensity that reduced the other Alicorn to muffled grunts of disagreement. “Moreover, Queen Chrysalis has invoked blood-magic to bind herself and her hive to a completely submissive role towards Equestria. They cannot take any action against us while within Equestria’s borders, whether by active or passive intent, or else the blood-pact will rebound on them, and given that their Queen is currently barely clinging to life I doubt the Hive will so much as look cross-eyed at my Ponies.”

“Injured?” Shining Armor asked loudly, giving up on trying to calm his wife down and, with Dappled supporting him, stood up stiffly, his neck-brace an uncomfortable but not unbearable burden. “What injured her? These ‘Elder Queens’ your message spoke of?”

“Oh, uh, apparently your sister dropped a castle on-top of her, Captain … err, Lord … Sir?” Dappled explained nervously, beginning to stammer when Shining glared at him, the neck-brace doing little to make him look less imposing.

“Yes. Our Queen suffered tremendous damage when your Junior Queen used her magic to collapse our home ontop of us.” The Changeling called ‘Scout’ ventured out from under Celestia’s tail, before earning herself matching angry looks from Shining and Cadence and retreating back under Celestia’s backside for protection.

“And the seriousness of the injuries cannot be understanded, Shining.” Bedside Manner, the Royal Physician, added as he readjusted the brace on Shining’s neck, completely unfazed as the twin glares turned his way next. “A single, solid blow could kill Chrysalis right now. I’m not even sure we can completely heal all her injuries, given how radically different a Changeling Queen’s internal organs are from those of a normal Changeling or Pony.”

“And according to Chrysalis she requires a substance called ‘Royal Jelly’ that she secreted and stored in an abandoned chamber in the bowels of Canterlot Castle to change one of her Drones into a new Queen for her Hive.” Gently scooting the Changeling out from under her with a hind-leg, Celestia placed the still-bound Cadence on the ground next to her ‘royal consort’ and gave them both withering looks that quickly defused their angry expressions into ones of disgruntled frustration. “Guard Dappled, Bedside Manner? Please escort Scout back to her quarters and inform the Royal Guards on-duty there that they are to immediately sound the alert if any members of the Crystal Empire embassy come within fifty feet of their positions. I think this meeting will go much smoother without a Changeling present to aggravate my guests’ tempers.”

“Yes, your majesty.” The Border Guard saluted and held the door open, leaning away from the Changeling as she slunk past the Crystal Princess and her Consort, while the Royal Physician merely sighed and trotted out behind her, the unlikely trio making a mad scramble for it once the doors were closed, judging by the sudden clop of hooves on marble.

“Now, before anything else is said, your first and only mistake has been assuming that I am allowing Queen Chrysalis back into the country without significant countermeasures being put into place. I am well aware of the danger of having the Changelings in Canterlot, but Bleak Mountain and the entirety of the Fourth Circle of Magi have blanketed the castle in runes and spell-matrixes designed to detect even the slightest hint of Changeling magic, and I have recalled some of our best Royal Agents to the Castle itself to spy on the Changelings. If Chrysalis so much as tries to levitate a roll of toilet paper, we know about it.” The Solar Monarch waited until the sound of galloping Ponies and Changelings had faded before dismissing the bonds on Cadence, who flapped her wings a few times to restore feeling in the limbs and gave the door a calculating look before apparently deciding she wouldn’t get a chance to make a break for the door before being grabbed by her aunt’s magic again. “And need I point out that Chrysalis has come bearing news about elder Queens across the Badlands who seek to invade Equestria, in addition to her complete surrender? We know precious little about the Changelings we already have to deal with, let alone these ‘elder breeds’, and this is a golden opportunity to learn as much as we can about the Changelings and their kin with minimal risk to our own people.”

“My apologies, Princess, but how do we know that Chrysalis isn’t just blowing hot air out between her plot-cheeks?” Shining asked as Cadence leaned against him for a few seconds, a warm reminder of everything that he’d almost lost to the machinations of the Changeling Queen. “She’s a shape-changer who is capable of social manipulation and subterfuge on such a grand scale even you couldn’t tell the difference between your own niece and the impostor. How can we be certain this isn’t just another ploy to try and conquer Equestria?”

“I can guarantee that’s not the case, since the Queen submitted to a geas to speak only the truth from both myself and Bleak Mountain. Two truth-geases, Shining, by two of the most powerful spell-casters on the planet. We got her to try to tell us a few lies and the geas functioned as well on a Changeling as a Pony, and then the Grand Magi and I began bombarding her with questions about the nature of the ‘threat’ the Elder Queens represent.” Celestia replied, giving the Stallion a sympathetic look, before seating herself on a couch and gesturing for the two of them to take a seat, while the Crystal Guards took the signal as the opportunity to assume the ‘parade rest’ stance. “Something you may be very interested to know, Cadence, is that Chrysalis and her ilk were designed to be infiltrators. They are an artificial race, created solely to spy upon our little Ponies by something Chrysalis called the ‘Empress’, an entity she is utterly terrified of …”

“Artificial meaning created by mortals? But that means they have no … oh. Oh no.” Cadence’s expression turned from angry confusion to actual concern before the pink Alicorn shook her head rapidly. “That doesn’t excuse what they did, auntie, you know that!”

“It does not, and the Changeling Queen will be called to account for the lives she endangered and the damage she caused, but right now I am more concerned there is a entity on the other side of the Badlands that can not only sculpt intelligent life, but can do so with enough power to spawn an entire race, complete with sub-species, and with the skill capable of creating a breed as complex and potent as the Changelings.”

“I will also point out that Queen Chrysalis submitting to myself and becoming a vassal of Equestria will do wonders for calming down our more volatile neighbours and hopefully delay any open conflict in the near future, and any information she can provide on these Elder Queens and their forces could be invaluable to defending Equestria and our allies from an invasion from the Elder Queens. The trial is scheduled to begin in roughly a month’s time, since Bedside Manner believes it would be beneficial for the Trial for the star of the show to not keel over dead in the middle of it all and a second inspection of the Queen’s injuries turned up some serious complications just from the vibrations from the train-trip alone. And a month should be enough time for you and Shining Armor to prepare a suitable case against Chrysalis, wouldn’t you say?”

Celestia sighed as Cadence’s and Shining’s expressions remained stony, levitated a chocolate wafer off her table and ate half of it before speaking. “While I will tell you right now that Chrysalis will not be exiled from Equestria regardless of the Trial’s outcome, since it would be too dangerous to leave her running loose outside our borders, there are still punitive measures on the table. At best, we’ll sign a treaty, legalize Changelings as full citizens of Equestria which will also make them answerable to our laws and I’ll keep Chrysalis and her Hive as far from the both of you as I can. At worst … well, the dungeons have been empty of anything besides rats and a few murderers for a century or so now. I’m sure we can keep the Changelings comfortably contained there until the Hive can produce a new Queen and we can try diplomacy again.”

“Besides, as the Changelings are an artificial race, Cadence, you will likely outlive their entire species. Consider that your revenge rather than banishing Chrysalis back under whatever castle she dug her way out of.”

For several moments the room was silent as the Guards, Royal and Crystal alike, gave Princess Celestia a puzzled look before an ashen-faced Cadence stood up.

“All Guards, I request you leave the room. Princess Celestia and I have to discuss a matter of … private concern.”

“Honey …” Shining began before a pink wing came out and smothered his muzzle and made his neck prick with pain, the brace doing little to stop him recoiling from being silenced so.

“You can stay, Shining, you’re my Consort after all, but this is … just too big to be spoken of openly. Guards …”

“You are correct, Cadence, I mis-spoke. Royal Guards, take up position outside of this room and prevent anyone, except other Princesses, from entering until I give you leave.” Princess Celestia added, her face a picture of serene calmness as the Guards gave each other concerned looks before marching out the doors, the last of them, Adamant, pulling the door closed behind him while shooting Shining Armor a searching look before the thick, magically-imbued doors closed shut.

“I … I can’t believe you said that in-front of the mortals, auntie.” Cadence whispered, collapsing more than sitting down. “I want them out of the kingdom before they can hurt our Ponies, and I wouldn’t say no to Chrysalis being … punished, but the entire species? That’s just …”

“Wait, back up, I’m obviously missing something here.” Shining shot a hoof into the air, head swivelling from Cadence to Celestia and back again.

“This is … confidential knowledge, Shining Armor. I trust in your integrity to not share this information, but it goes no further than yourself, am I clear?” Celestia explained calmly, finishing off her wafer biscuit before giving him an even look that still somehow managed to make the hairs all over his body stand on end. “Every intelligent species on Equis is a planned race, or at least that is what they are supposed to be. Placed here by the … we Immortals call them the ‘Powers’, the forces who are everywhere and everything, simultaneously. And every intelligent species will, at one point or another, have Immortals such as Alicorns appear, beings that Ascended from the base-form of the species as part of a system to regulate the growth of sentient life throughout the universe.”

“Immortals exist as a middle-pony between these Powers and the Mortal races they represent, so that the Powers can keep track of their creations and make sure that everything is running as it’s supposed to. We’re not all dying off, or becoming too powerful for our own good, the planet hasn’t been invaded by aliens or gods, that sort of thing.” Cadence added, wrapping a wing around Shining Armor as his eyes went wide and his mouth slack at the revelations being given to him. “The problem is that sentient races who aren’t planned for by the Powers tend to … to disappear after a while. Even when a race goes into decline, so long as their Immortals remain, the species always seems to find a way to hang on until they can adapt and begin to recover. But if an Immortal is somehow rendered powerless, or is stripped of their rank by the Powers … the race they represent is doomed to extinction sooner or later.”

“Created races, or perhaps a better term is Artificial Races, however, are not part of the overriding plan of the Powers, a plan not even we Immortals fully understand even after tens of thousands of years of studying and communing with the Powers.” Celestia spoke again, pointedly ignoring Cadence’s expression of concern as the larger alicorn plunged on. “These Artificial Races will never develop Immortals unless the Powers are made aware of their existence by the pre-existing Immortals, and for the most part the Artifical Races will only exist for a few short generations before disappearing, although the more tenacious species can last for a significant amount of time. Case in point, the Gryphons, whom appeared overnight almost four thousand years ago and have a host of problems that constantly plague their kind, such as an abnormally high rate of defective births coupled with a low rate of conception that has put them on a slow slide to extinction.”

“While Immortals have tried to aid Artificial Races in the past, we’ve been mostly unsuccessful in our efforts due to the trouble in contacting the Powers directly. The last attempt was the Parliament’s efforts to grant the Gryphons an Immortal of their own to try and bring them into harmony with the rest of the world, which backfired spectacularly when the candidate was murdered by his two older brothers on the cusp of his Ascension in a futile attempt to claim his impending ‘god-hood’ for themselves, and the backwash of wasted power fused the brothers together into a twisted monstrosity who sought revenge against the Parliament of Immortals for their ‘situation’, a mockery who became deified by his people and is the reason why, even now, most of the races on this continent are still locked in a state of constant skirmishing with the Gryphons.” Shining forced himself to maintain eye-contact with Celestia even as the revelations gnawed at the foundations of his world-view. He had always known his wife was important for more than just being a lovely mare with an unusual gift and stonking-hot wings, but to know she was some sort of mystical pillar that prevented his very species from going extinct? He knew there were other god-like beings in the world, one did not serve as Celestia’s right hoof without being informed about some of her secrets, and Discord was undisputable proof that there were beings out there that even eclipsed Celestial’s power, but that there was a level even beyond that of Celestia and Discord …

“So even if Queen Chrysalis is healed and we make peace with the Changelings … they’re going to die out anyways?” Cadence whispered softly, hugging her husband as Shining obviously struggled with the revelations.

“Sadly yes, unless the Powers could be contacted and agree to imbue a Changeling, turning one of the species into an Immortal and guaranteeing their future. And we’re not dealing with minds like ours. They … let’s call it the ‘consciousness’ of Powers existence on a plane of existence several layers removed from our own while simultaneously, their essence exists on multiple other planes of existence. By the time we could successfully communicate our intent to the Powers and they could translate what we were asking for into something they could comprehend, the Changelings could have been extinct for centuries, or it could happen five minutes before we even ask. Time and Space have no meaning for entities who literally are such things.” The Solar Monarch gave the two visiting rulers a wan smile as her horn rippled with magic again, and the tray of biscuits was levitated over to them. “I see this attempt at diplomacy with the Changelings as less some sort of feather in my cap, and closer to a nurse caring for a very sick patient who has only the slightest chance of recovery. If the worst happens, I can help them find the grace to meet their end with dignity. If things take a turn for the better however, then I have preserved life and hopefully created a situation where both Changelings and Ponies can continue to live in peace.”

“I still do not trust Chrysalis. I … I cannot trust her, Celestia.” Cadence whispered, still pale-faced but resolute. “If you will not banish her, then she must be confined. The rest of the Changelings might be a different story, but …”

“The Changelings are a hive-mind, Cadence. If we imprison Chrysalis, the rest of the Hive will stay with her unto death. They can no more be separated from one-another than a Pegasus’s wing can be cut off and fly away on its own.” Celestia warned as Cadence snagged a biscuit off the tray and began to nibble at it to hide her distress. “And Bedside Manner did say that it is highly unlikely that Queen Chrysalis will ever recover enough to be a true threat. Most likely, she will attempt to change one of her Drones into a new Queen, and then we shall have to deal with a new and untested leader of a people who, at best, number less than four-score and are universally reviled across our country.”

“You’ve only her word that she can make a new Queen out of a Drone. For all we know, she’s making an acid-bomb out of one of her own and you’re going to get turned into a bubbling green puddle on the ground right when Equestria needs you most.” Cadence snapped, pointing the slightly-soggy wafer at Celestia like a sword.

“And that is a risk, as an Immortal, that I am willing to take. I have faith that in the time it would take to make my way out of Tartarus and reconstitute a physical form, Twilight and Luna would be able to keep the country running along smoothly.” Celestia countered, taking another wafer biscuit and consuming it with a single bite, while Cadence quickly had to juggle hers with magic as the soggy biscuit threatened to fall apart onto the rich carpet. “I have been doing this for thousands of years, my dear. Trust that I have countermeasures in place for almost every contingency you could think of, and assassinations of my person are hardly unexpected. You’d think after the first dozen or so attempts failed to do more than annoy me that it would stop, but alas …”

“So our only options are … accept that the being who nearly ruined our lives gets off with a slap on the wrist and citizenship, or we imprison her under Canterlot Castle until she spawns a new Queen to look after her people, which might be an entirely pointless exercise because some sort of … super-gods out there didn’t get a damn memo?” Shining muttered darkly, taking up a biscuit of his own and crunching through loudly and rudely, daring Princess Celestia to say something as he glared at her.

“Life has given us lemons, Shining Armor, so I suggest you learn to like lemonade or tequila. Sometimes our options do not grant us the luxury of picking the lesser of two evils, so stow the sass until you’ve had to live with the crushing weight of a kingdom on your shoulders for a decade or two, let alone an entire world for a few millennium.” Celestia shot back, raising an eyebrow at him that disturbingly, reminded Shining of his own mother and he had to fight the twin urges to recant, both from his training as a soldier and his boyhood experiences with cookie-jars and wooden spoons. “I am well aware that Chrysalis has caused both of you tremendous amounts of pain and grief, but I am an Alicorn first, Princess second, and an aunt a distant third, however much I might wish it was otherwise, and as such I have a duty to spread Harmony and tolerance throughout the world and help preserve life wherever I find it.”

“And if we violate the terms you sent us on the train?” The former Royal Guard pushed, hoping the cold sweat he was feeling wasn’t noticeable to his former boss.

“Then I will be very disappointed in the two of you, both as a mentor and a fellow leader, but all you will accomplish is being sent back to the Crystal Empire and losing any chance to have influence over what happens to Queen Chrysalis and her Hive.” Celestia replied calmly, although flickers of red and orange light appeared in her mane and tail. “I do not fault you, either of you, for rushing to my side to help with what you thought was a grotesque failure in my judgement, but I would ask you both to step back and observe the situation as the rulers of a nation, rather than victims. You will get your chance to have your say and influence the course of action we take, but for now we must remember that our actions as the leaders of nations will affect potentially millions of lives, not just our own.”

“That said, I have something rather interesting to tell you both that might just put the pep back in your step.” A hint of a smile appeared on Celestia’s face as Cadence and Shining gave her nervous looks at the sudden change in the conversation’s direction. “Tell me, Shining Armor, how would you like to make a surprise visit to see your little sister in Ponyville? Take Cadence with you and find some emotional calm before you both return to Canterlot for the Trial? Perhaps get a chance to talk to her friends, play some Ogres and Oubliettes with Spike and Big Mac … have a chance to spend some quality time with Twilight and her new marefriend?”

“Well, it has been a while since I saw her last, that actually sounds like a … a good …” Shining’s words slowed as his brain slowly caught onto something that Celestia had said, something that, somehow, didn’t seem right.

Turning to look at his wife, hoping she would save him from the embarrassment of having to asking Princess Celestia to repeat herself in the aftermath of the tense atmosphere, Shining instead found himself looking into the equally-confused face of his wife who had done the exact same thing.

As one, the two turned to Princess Celestia …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So … d’you think everything is okay in there? I mean, it was getting super aggressive in there for a bit.” Flash whispered, the Guards, Royal and Crystal alike leaning against the doors with their ears pressed firmly to the hardwood, straining to hear anything. Curiosity over the strangeness of the situation had overcome training, although not without significant whining from the veteran Guards, and now all of them struggled to hear what was so important that Princess Cadence and Princess Celestia would banish them from the room.

With all the security spells in place, it was likely a futile effort, but the need to know what was so top-secret, especially if it involved the Changelings, had overcome every other concern.

“Flash, I swear to Faust, if you don’t shut your hay-hole, I am going to …” Adamant began, lifting his head away from the door to scowl at his compatriot when it happened.

“WHAT?” Shining and Cadence’s voice boomed, loud enough that it defeated even the muffling enchantments built into the very walls, throwing the guards still pressed to the doors back against the other wall as their eardrums were abused, window-panes shuddered in their frames and suits of ornamental armor, freshly polished and repaired after their self-animation a few days ago had them all dented and scratched, shuddered and fell off their racks with a clatter.

“WHAT HAPPENED? I CAN’T HEAR YOU, ADAMANT! WHAT HAPPENED?” Flash Sentry shouted from under a pile of groaning Guards as alarms began to sound throughout the castle.

“Never mind …” Adamant groaned, trying vainly to pull himself out of gap between two marble pillars he found himself wedged in-between and making do with a clumsy salute as a panicked-looking Shining Armor and Cadence threw the doors open and bolted, not towards the wing where the Changelings were quartered, but back towards the Castle’s entrance.

“Need a hoof?” Princess Celestia offered, walking on three legs out of her private quarters, the fourth leg massaging at her head.

“Please, your Majesty.” Adamant whimpered as golden magic gripped his body and slowly tugged him out of his impromptu prison, while the Guards who had come rushing to see what had caused the ruckus helped the other Royal Guards, several of whom shared Flash Sentry’s temporary deafness and kept shouting for everypony to speak up, onto their hooves and towards the chambers of the Royal Physician. “Ca-can I ask what happened, Ma’am? Are my Princess and my captain in trouble?”

“Oh? No no, we settled our dispute as well as could be expected, given the circumstances.” The solar monarch gave a small, soft smile, which rapidly bloomed into an intoxicating grin that made Adamant profoundly grateful that he preferred Stallions to Mares, else he might have fallen hard at the sight of Celestia’s radiant face. “But I do think I’ve perhaps given Shining and Cadence something else to focus on other than their issues with the Changelings.”

Chapter 57

CHAPTER 57

“So we’re stuck?” Spud asked softly, the two Stallions sitting in the back-yard, smoking and ‘enjoying’ a cup of tea as the rest of the expanded household enjoyed a racous debate indoors over who would sleep where and what furniture would go where.

“We’re stuck. Velvet and Thunderwing pointed out the … idiocy … of trying to up and fight the Shadow Court with so many non-combatants in the group, and I’ve gone over and over it in my mind, but the fact remains they’ve got the right of it.” Night Light groaned and took a long drag of his cigarette. He’d given it up years ago when first joined the army, picked the habit up again when Shining first came into the world and Night Light suffered the jitters all first-time parents get, and then kicked it again when he realized his new son was being exposed to his second-hoof smoke.

It was a testimony to how shaken up he felt right now that he’d weakened and borrowed a cigarette from Spud after years of denying the damn things.

“Bollocks. I was lookin’ forwards to knockin’ some heads in.” The burly, mangled Earth Pony snorted, twin streams of smoke ejecting from his nostrils. “Can’t say I blame you, lad. Me lovelies might be willin’ an' able to kick all kinds of arse, but let’s be honest with ourselves, most of our wives and partners here aren’t military, and most of us who were haven’t been on the frontlines in over a decade. That said … maybe a road-trip’s in order?”

“We’re just about ready to make my house into a veritable fortress of solitude in suburbia and you want to take a road-trip?”

“Think about it, Night. We know the Shadow Court’s gonna come for us sooner or later, an’ the Princess has made sure we can’t leave the country to get away from them wit’ that royal order she sent each an’ every one o’ us. Even with all the pretty lil’ toys Thunderwing’s snagged for us, we’re still jus’ a hoof-ful of old soldiers wit’ our special someponies jus’ sittin’ in a house, waitin’ fer an attack that could wipe half of us out before we’re even aware its happenin’.” Spud explained, taking a loud, noisy slurp of his cup as Night took a quiet, thoughtful sip while he listened to his former commanding officer’s idea. “So once we get the house all set up … road trip. We all go out, pretendin’ we’re goin’ shoppin’, but what we’re really doin’ is getting’ ourselves outta Canterlot for a few weeks, an’ seein’ that Thunderwing’s bein’ so good to us, we get some Royal Guards to occupy the house while we’re gone, pretend to be us while Royal Guards ferry food an supplies into the house fer them, pretendin’ we’re all hunkering down like mice ‘fore the winter.”

“…You’re talking about what we did with the Gryphon artillery-units at Thunder Falls, aren’t you? Have the injured troops moving around and making as much noise as they can so it looks like the unit is just lounging around in the bunkers, while the bulk of the unit was actually moving to another location while Gryphons dug in to fight the ‘troops’ at the original base.”

“Sorta, but we’re not gonna be getting’ blood on our hooves, your brides be right on that count. Me lovely Autumn Glory is a member o’ the Apple-Clan, an’ we got kin all across Equestria, so gettin’ messages back to Canterlot on the sly won’t be hard, an’ if’n we keep movin’ randomly ‘cross the country an’ visitin’ me wife’s family, an’ there’s Apples everywhere in Equestria, we should keep the Shadow Court from findin’ us too easily.” The burly Stallion gave Night Light a broad grin as he spoke. “Thunderwing says the Shadow Court’s got most of their ponies tied up in Canterlot tryin’ to keep the pressure up on the Princess an’ undermine her in the papers, so they rely on eyes-for-hire to keep track of things outside o’ the capital, an’ those wage-thieves ain’t known fer bein’ the kind o’ careful that the Shadow Court is. If we keep a low profile an’ blend in, we could be halfway ‘cross the country before they even realize we’re not in the capital, and then they gotta find us amongst all those Ponies out there …”

“There’s a couple of problems with that plan, Spud. Vet’kloue is a Zebra, and they aren’t exactly common in Equestria. And your mug isn’t something that’s easily hidden while we’re on the topic.” Night Light pointed out, frowning slightly at how pessimistic he sounded.

It was a good plan. It could work. It would throw the Shadow Court off their trail for several weeks, if not longer, if they took pains to hide their identities and keep away from the obvious tourist-traps where Ponies, and cameras, were common-place.

So why was he so determined to find fault with it?

“Eh, I’ve got a wig from the old days I can put on that’ll cover me ears, an’ Vet’kloue an’ me other brides can figure out how to deal wit’ her stripes. C’mon Night, it’ll work. The Princess did say ‘anythin’ sort o’ leavin’ the country or treason’. We go an’ borrow some bits, take a quiet, eh, ‘country tour’ while leavin’ some Royal Guards behind to make your house look lived in, an’ we keep movin’ till that evil old mule gets dealt with.”

“I want to clear it with everypony else first, but I think you’re right, Spud. We get Celestia to loan us the bits for an extended trip around the countryside, do what we can to make ourselves as boring and bland as we can and try to wait this out. I just … I just wish we could do something, you know?” Night Light put down his cup of tea, leaned forwards and put his face in his hooves. “We’re old. Faust help me, but we’re all so old. I was so sure we’d take the fight to the Shadow Court, to Bluebone, we’d knock their little house of cards over and laugh as their plans went up in smoke, like the old days, but … we’re not those Ponies anymore, are we?”

“S’not a happy thing to admit, but aye, our days o’ piss’n’vinegar are done. Tha’s not to say we still can’t put the hoof in when we get the chance, but we gotta be smarter’n we were back in the old days.” Spud relied sagely, then lifted a haunch and let rip with enough force Night Light swore he felt a breeze. Thankfully the calming smoke of the cigarette had poisoned his mouth and nostrils enough he couldn’t smell anything. “But do remember lad, we’ve got some of the brassiest soldiers ever to sign up fer the Princess’s Guard. Ex-snipers, scouts, intelligence-ponies, even yours truly. Jus’ cause we ain’t lookin’ these prigs in the eyes as we’re kickin’ their faces in don’t mean we can’t fight, jus we gotta be fightin’ smarter.”

“How? If we’re laying low and keeping our heads down, how can we fight?”

“The Apple-Clan is the key, lad. The family’s almost all Earth Ponies, an’ maybe a smatterin’ o’ the other Tribes, an’ that puts the whole family square in the sights o’ the Shadow Court’s agenda, an’ both sides know it. We get the Apples’ all riled up-like, an’ get ‘em pointed at the Shadow Court and their Council, we’re gonna pick a fight unlike anythin’ Equestria’s seen in centuries.” Spud turned and gave his friend a wicked grin, made almost malevolent by his stumps of ears and mangled face. “Apples run a lot o’ the country lad. Maybe not own a lot of high-fancy places like the Shadow Court does, but farms, breweries, small businesses? An’ most everypony in the country does business with an Apple somehow, so if’n we get the entire Clan to start makin’ a stink ‘bout the Unicorn bigots in Canterlot …”

“Wait … aren’t we then putting the Apples in the firing line then? What’s the point in saving our partners if we put all those Ponies at risk?”

“If’n the Shadow Court wins, then they’ll all be workin’ fer Ponies who seem all other Tribes as sub-equines. Better to pick this fight a’fore the Shadow Court can gain any more ground than they’ve got. An’ besides, it was Autumn Glory who suggested it to me after we came home from shopping an’ she had a chat wit’ yer bride when you were sulkin’ in your room.” The mangled grey-coated Stallion replied, waving a hoof at Night Light’s startled expression. “You’re so worried ‘bout the Shadow Court an’ their Council you forget their reach only has bite in Canterlot. Y’get a few miles from the walls, best they can do is write some lies in the papers or maybe hire a few thugs t’getcha in a dark alley. An’ old we might be, but a buncha nancies like them six idiots who came for you in the Bronze Leaf ain’t gonna be much o’ a problem fer us.”

“Think ‘bout it, Night. How many Ponies can the Shadow Court really throw at us? A few hundred? A few thousand? I can tell you now, the Apple-Clan has tens o’ thousands o’ kin, an’ even more that trade with ‘em, depend on ‘em fer jobs or call ‘em friend?” Spud continued, his remaining eye twinkling with evil mirth. “We’ll not be trying to start riots, but imagine it, lad. All them voices, raised as one, demandin’ the Princesses stamp out the corruption, callin’ fer justice. Ain’t no amount o’ lies and slander the papers can print that’ll be able to drown that out, be like a beaver’s damn tryin’ to hold back a tsunami o’ shit.”

Night Light sat back and looked at Spud, chewing on his bottom lip.

The plan could work. No, scratch that, it would work. The Shadow Court and their ‘Council’ had manipulated the media for decades, trying to undermine Celestia’s own authority, trying to portray a Unicorn-dominated Equestria as a sensible option, the only sensible option.

So getting the bulk of the population, who happened to be Earth Ponies, to rail against that agenda could only draw attention to the corruption that the Shadow Court represented. Yes, the Shadow Court would try to stifle the protests and down-play the claims, but if Autumn Glory and Spud were right, and the entire Apple-Clan would play their part …

It can work. We use this attack on myself as a launching point, get Ponies riled up and worried about the Tribalists in Canterlot, it gives Celestia ammunition to use against the Shadow Court, forces the Shadow Council to tread lightly or else expose themselves … scratch Bluebone finally getting his comeuppance, we could actually derail the Shadow Court itself! If the Shadow Court goes to pieces with the individual Council-members trying to save their own hides from the public backlash, Rosebush should be able to throw some plea-bargains here and there from the less-important members, the ones without the bits or connections to avoid the worst of the shit-storm, and from them she should get enough evidence to get the worst of the lot rotting in Horseshoe Bay.

It could work. But the catalyst would be exposing the attack on himself, and Princess Celestia had never said anything about not making an official statement about it … merely that he was only to take ‘defensive’ actions, and was not permitted to leave the country. And Celestia had said ‘any means necessary short of treason or murder’ …

“Hey, Spud?”

“Yeah Night? Thinking of going with the plan?”

“Maybe. But first, do you know if Bronze Gong still keeps in touch with his sister in the Princess’s PR department?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So?”

“So? SO!? Faust damn your proud hide, Bluebone, this is big! Seriously big! The Changelings are back and they submitted to the Princess! I don’t think I have to explain what a political coup that is for the mutant whore, or what happens if this ‘Chrysalis’ is the same Queen your grand-father tried to coerce into helping our order?” Amber Hooves snarled, slamming a hoof down on the desk as the two middle-aged Stallions glared at each other. “Do I need to remind you that the incident with the Changelings infiltrating the city the first time ended in such a disaster that Bluelocks had to take the fall for the entire ordeal, to willingly be framed by the Shadow Court for smuggling migrants into the city as underpaid labourers rather than let the False Princess know we’re tried to coerce an unknown species of shape-changing magic-using bug-ponies into a plot to either replace or assassinate her?”

“I am well aware of what fate my grandfather endured, Almond, or have you forgotten I orchestrated the silencing of my own father after we learned he planned to give up the names of all the Council-members to the Bitch-Princess in exchange for his own life?” Bluebone snorted and leaned back in his chair, trying to project an image of calm disinterest … and seethed as he realized he was likely failing.

The Changelings were back. Their second invasion, the one that had almost ruined the wedding of that filthy air-headed Cadence and the loathesome blood-traitor Shining Armor, the one that most of Equestria considered their first invasion, had caused immense damage to Canterlot’s various districts, and almost unravelled the Shadow Court and ruined the constituent Noble families. Tens of thousands of bits lost protecting the Council-members as the debacle exposed vulnerabilities or secrets were suddenly no longer hidden away beneath lock and key, and even more money, let alone irreplaceable political favours, had to be spent tying off loose ends in ways that made it all but impossible for the Royal Guards to chase the leads to any meaningful end.

But if Chrysalis was the same Changeling Queen his grandfather had failed to coerce into aiding the Shadow Court, she would likely bear a monumental grudge against everypony who had sworn allegiance to the true inheritors of Equestria. And if the Court’s informants were correct and the Changeling Queen was counting on the Bitch-Princess’s supposedly-infinite mercy to give her access to a life-saving operation for her own injuries, Chrysalis would give up the information to save her own monstrous skin, and revenge would be just a happy coincidence. The Shadow Court had to move, and fast, to remove the Queen from the equation before the Changeling was healed and gave up her information to Celestia, information that could destroy the Shadow Court and unravel the Great Work before it reached fruition.

We are close. So close! Bluebone seethed, crossing his forelimbs across his chest and leaning back in his chair as Almond Hooves did the same, but probably for different reasons. Their arguments these days seemed more about Almond trying to save Bluebone’s position, rather than fulfilling his duty as a Shadow Councillor and freeing Unicorn kind from the false-Princess’s shackles of ‘friendship and harmony’ with the lesser Tribes. “Almond … about Beaker’s work, we will need to accelerate his work, regardless of what happens with the Changelings. If need be, members of the Shadow Court can go underground and raise our champion away from Canterlot, groom her to be the successor that our nation needs.”

“Leave Canterlot? You might as well ask them to saw off their own horns and pretend to be mud-ponies! Half of the Councillors haven’t even set hoof down into the Commoner Districts in their entire lives, and Faust only knows what the other half would do if you even suggested it!” Almond scoffed in disgust at the idea.

“No, you fool, think about it! If the Changeling Queen is the same one that caused my grandfather’s fall from power, then she has the entire Shadow Court, and by extension the families of the Councillors, by the balls. At best, our kin would be facing exile from Equestria with nothing but the clothes on their backs, at worst they could face annihilation along with the Shadow Councillors.” Bluebone snapped, unleashing his anger on the other Stallion, who recoiled a little at the venom in Bluebone’s voice. “Forget about my being expunged from the Council and then silenced. Forget about the squabbling of the Councillors for the Chairman’s position. Even forget about our plans for a pure-blooded Alicorn Princess to be our champion. If the Changeling Queen can provide enough evidence that outs any single Councillor in this Trial that the Bitch-Princess is crowing so loud about, each and every one of us is sunk.”

“I am aware of …”

“No you are not. This is Princess Celestia, a Mare who, according to her own journal, written down by her own hoof, single-hoofedly annihilated an entire civilisation thousands of years before our species ever migrated across the Dragonspine Mountains. An entire civilisation, her civilisation, gone in one strike that destroyed the defenders and incinerated the civilian population in an instant.”

Almond blinked a few times and coughed nervously before a muted “I had heard the rumors, but …” sneaked out of his mouth.

“An entire civilisation, Almond, and by all accounts one far more magically advanced than our own, considering even their Mud-Ponies could use magic. According to the relics our people have pulled up on their little unsanctioned digs in the Badlands, this civilisation spanned fully half the continent and had conquered that territory through force of arms before Celesita. Wiped. Her. Own. Tribe. Out.” Bluebone carefully bit off every word while glaring deep into Almond’s eyes. “So cast your concerns about politics and positions aside for the moment and consider what she will do to us? Especially if she finds Professor Beaker’s little carnival of horrors beneath the school?”

To his credit, Almond only paled slightly as he considered that little gem of information

“We need to slip an assassin into the castle and take out the Changeling Queen now, while she’s vulnerable. If she lives long enough to be healed, or even gives up her information first as a sign of good faith …”

The words hung in the air between the two Stallions like some dreadful wraith, casting a pall of doom across the room as the two members of the Shadow Court sat back and plotted.

“It will have to be one of our own that squashes the bug then.” Almond sighed gustily, opening a drawer on his table and pulling out a stout, crystal bottle of dark-red whiskey, and then two tumblers of similarly-cut crystal.

“You have gone mad. One of our own could be traced back to us, and that would be just as fatal for the cause as the Changeling Queen squealing on us.” Bluebone sighed and accepted his glass, cradling it between his front-hooves and savouring the smell of the strong alcohol. If things went poorly in the near future, he might very well not taste such finery for decades, if ever again.

“No, Bluey, this time it’s you who doesn’t understand. None of the usual mercenaries are answering us, not after what happened with the Spiral Pikes, and especially not after a dozen different assassins at Celestia’s little speech this morning were all nabbed by the Royal Guard … after being told that the Shadow Court was the one hiring them, and that we had extraction plans in-place for them should things go south, and then we never showed up to bail them out. Needless to say, the type of mercenaries who’d even dare take on such a job aren’t listening to anything we say when we explain the Shadow Court had nothing to do with those assassination attempts.” Almond explained, and Bluebone grimaced as if he’d tasted something vile. His current … situation had necessitated him being cut off from all current information the Shadow Court had assembled, a security measure he himself had implemented, but still, to be left behind in the schemes of the Shadow Council rankled the Unicorn’s black heart. “Apparently some lunatic dressed up in a white bedsheet and a pointy hat has been hiring out mercenaries like they’ve got bottomless pockets of bits to spend, and after all of the mercenaries he … or she, for all we’ve been able to find out … hired ended up running into the Royal Guard in all the wrong ways, only the most desperate mercenaries are even considering hiring out in Canterlot right now. And their descriptions of the mysterious hiring party matches the description of the same lunatic who hired the six mercenaries from the Spiral Pikes to try to kidnap Night Light and got you into this mess.”

“So long as the Spiral Pikes remain loyal to us, we can compensate for a lack of ponypower. But what about the other groups, ones with less … infamous reputations?” Bluebone asked, teeth grating together in frustration as he rolled the whiskey-filled glass back and forth between his hooves. He had a pleasant arrangement with the Witches who ruled the Spiral Pikes, they took care of his troubles, both outside and inside the Shadow Court, discreetly and in return Bluebone used his political clout and connections to keep the Royal Guard and outraged civilians off their backs. It also afforded both sides leverage on the other, because if one went down, they had enough dirt to drag the other down too.

But if none of the other mercenary companies was interested in working for the Shadow Court, how long would it be before the Blood Witches who led the Spiral Pikes decided self-imposed exile in a nation outside Equestria was preferable to continuing to tie their fates to the Shadow Court, or worse, decided to remove any potential vulnerability by eradicating the Councillors who had dealings with them?

Blood Witches were notoriously difficult to keep under one’s control, and if the Spiral Pikes decided removing the Shadow Court was beneficial to keeping themselves away from Celestia’s disapproving gaze, the Spiral Pikes could do immense damage to the Shadow Court simply due to their familiarity with the Shadow Court’s infrastructure, let alone what over three-hundred hex-wielding Unicorn warriors could do to the actual Court and it’s Councillors ...

“The Silver Horns, as always, flat out refuse any offer we make. Bastards should just sign on with the Night Guard and be done with it.” The other Stallion grumbled, and both Unicorns spat in disgust. Mercenaries should only have allegiances to good solid bits, not some ancient oath of allegiance with the Lunar Monarch. “The Black Points, the Irregular Suspects and the Iron Herd have all, in the politest possible manner I might add, told us to go shove our bits back up our arses. Whoever this blanket-wearing lunatic is, they’ve put the wind up every reliable mercenary company within Canterlot to the point we’d be throwing a veritable fortune at them just to do something other than guard duty …”

“And hiring mercenary companies who don’t have sanction to set up shop in Canterlot would attract even more attention from the Princesses and the Royal Guards down to the thugs in the alleyways … blast!” Bluebone spat in annoyance, the glob landing in the fire-place and sizzling away into nothingness in the flames. We simply don’t have the space for a private army, not in Canterlot, let alone trying to hide their existence from that Whorse, Celestia. And most Unicorns with the potential for combat-training are snatched up by the Royal Guard and indoctrinated into obeying the false Princesses.

“We could try hiring non-Unicorn groups, but managing how our people interact with theirs would be problematic, we would be dealing with members from the lesser Tribes, and ones not used to acknowledging their superiors at that. In the worst-case scenario, we’d be developing more witnesses for the Royal Guard to use against us.”

“No. First, we must divide our resources, all of them, towards two objectives. Above all else, we must find who it is who is going around claiming to speak with our name and bring them to justice. Our justice. Displaying this individual to the leaders of the mercenary groups who have rejected us will have several beneficial results for us, including instilling some respect for our noble cause back into their gold-loving hearts and a succinct reminder of what happens to those who go against the Shadow Court as we twist the life from this upstart wretch before their eyes.” Bluebone’s horn levitated the tumbler out of his hooves and to his lips, the aging Stallion taking a short sip and grimacing as the strong whiskey burned down his throat. “The other objective is to find somepony disposable, somepony unassuming, somepony who is willing to give their life for the cause and get close enough to the Changeling Queen to be the focus of a spell.”

“You know Princess Celestia will have powerful wards in-place after the Blood Witches failed to kill their own troops with a death-hex. She may be a blight on our nation, but the Princess has not held onto power for three thousand years by sitting on her hooves.”

“Oh, undoubtedly, Almond, but we’re not going to be using necromancy or evocation spells. No, we’ll be sending in somepony who won’t arouse suspicion with an item charged with as much telekinetic power as it can hold, focused on a sharp object. All our little assassin will have to do will be get close enough to trigger the item and deliver a strong enough blow to kill the Changeling Queen.” Bluebone took another sip of his whiskey and smiled as the burn came again, but this time milder, and his insides warmed with the firey liquor. “There’s many Ponies within the serving staff of the castle who require aids to assist in their duties, why not a poor little Mare whose magical abilities are below par who needs a charmed amulet to help her with simple telekinesis?”

“That … is absolute genius, Bluebone. The Whorse-Princess has a tendency to take pity on the weak, and such a cover-story wouldn’t rouse any suspicion from the Royal Guards.”

“Shall we see to the plan then?” Bluebone smirked as Almond nodded and rushed from the room to send the information to the other Councillors, the white-coated Stallion leaning back into his chair and downing the tumbler of whiskey in one gulp before levitating the bottle over to his side and pouring himself another glass of Almond’s whiskey.

Savour your temporary victories, Celestia, you whorse. I will see the Unicorns claim their rightful place as rulers over all the Tribes, and you and the other freaks of nature will exist only long enough to challenge this ‘Unnamed One’ before I purge the world of your filth, once and for all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What do you mean we can’t take a Pegasi-powered chariot?” Shining Armor fumed, glaring holes through the pale-faced Royal Guard’s skull as the spluttering Pegasus frantically tried to appease the furious Royal Consort, while Cadence, rather unhelpfully, had commandeered what looked like an entire pallet’s worth of post-it notes, enough coloured yarn to knit a dozen sweaters and several boxes of push-pins and had turned the largest wall in their suite into something that belong in a strategy-meeting from the lowest pits of Tartarus, all the while giggling in a way that made Shining’s mane stand on end.

“Ah-a-apologies, Royal Consort, but after the trip to Ponyville to combat the Succuponi, Commander Dart ordered every chariot to undergo rigorous testing when several of the Unicorns who had recently used them commented that they noticed the floors of the vehicles sagged under their weight.” The poor Pegasus Royal Guard whimpered, still gamely holding his parade position even as his face and wings screamed he just wanted to run away. “Th-the only remaining chariots are either already in use ferrying troops and special supplies to the border we share with the United States of Gryphonia, or were commandeered under special order by Princess Luna to ferry supplies to sustain a flock of her Night Guard that has been moved to Ponyville to oversee protection of the Bearers.”

“All of the chariots.”

“Y-yes, Royal Consort, all of the chariots.”

For several moments, Shining glared into the poor Stallion’s eyes before stepping back silently and closing the door in the other Pony’s face, pretending he hadn’t heard the tearful ‘Thank Faust’ from the other side of the door.

“For the love of …” Shining hissed, conjuring a small shield around his muzzle and then venting his frustrations at the top of his lungs into the sealed space, allowing every vulgar word and frustrated scream out while not disturbing his wife until he had to dispel the barrier to breathe before doing it again and again until he finally felt calm enough.

This has Dart’s hoof-prints all over it. Shining thought to himself bitterly. And now that I think about it, probably Rhinestone too. Cadence and I haven’t thought about Changelings in hours, we’re locked up tight in the castle since the Royal Train is undergoing repairs because Celestia’s engineers found some sort of ‘mysterious’ problem in the locomotive’s steam-engine, now the Pegasi Chariots are out of commission because of faulty floor-boards …

Celestia had given them the old bait-and-switch tactic, and it burned the former Guardspony’s pride that he’d fallen for it so easily. Cadence would, naturally, go ga-ga at the news of one of her closest friends falling in love, both because of her Aspect and her personality, but for Shining himself? He’d just heard ‘sister’ and ‘marefriend’ and his mind had gone white …

I know she’s straight. I know it. Inexperienced perhaps, but Twilight has always had eyes for Stallions … wait! What if that debacle with Flash Sentry made her give up on Stallions? It would make sense, if she assumed most Stallions were like that git, she’d start collecting facts and … oh Faust, what if that’s what’s happened? A dyed-in-the-wool lesbian convinced Twilight most Stallions are like Flash Sentry and she switched teams because of it!

Horrifying scenarios of trying to explain to his parents how his subordinate had put the kibosh on the prospect of grandchildren from Twilight flashed through Shining’s mind. His parents had been saddened to hear it was highly unlikely that Cadence would conceive given the natural barriers between Mortals and Immortals interbreeding, but the thought of his mother’s expression when told that Twilight would likely never look at a Stallion that way chilled Shining’s blood like not even the perpetual winter that blanketed the lands around the Crystal Empire ever did.

“Ooooooh, I wonder who it could be? Rainbow Dash? Rarity? Maybe Spike …. no, the Westermarck effect is in full effect there and Princess Celestia said ‘Marefriend’. Maybe Fluttershy? Two quiet little Ponies blossoming together … squeeeeeeee!”

At least one of us is happy about this turn of events. The Stallion sighed and turned around to give his princess wife a dirty look that was completely ignored as Cadence’s magic interacted with the sloppy spider’s nest of coloured twine and post-it notes, moving strings and re-arranging the pieces of paper in a complex, chaotic dance as Cadence plotted out the likely Mare that had stolen Twilight’s heart and doomed Shining to being the sole chance of providing the much-desired grandchildren his mother craved.

“Honey, have you considered that it might be somepony you don’t know?” Shining muttered, trudging over to Cadence’s side, who remained oblivious to both his tone and his presence as she continued to alter her ‘shipping chart’.

“Applejack? They’re worlds apart, but maybe … oh. Oh! Pinkie Pie could … no, that would just be too random for Twilight, even if she had fallen in love.”

“Honey.”

“Maybe it’s the zebra? A taste of the exotic, eh, dearest sister-in-law? The last letter I got from her did say she was ‘amazed’ at how much Zecora’s potions could do … scientific curiosity leading to puppy-dog admiration leading to …”

“Honey. Please, just stop, you don’t even know if it’s a steady Marefriend or not. And I’m fairly certain my sister is straighter than Celestia’s damn horn.”

“But the anticipation is killing me, Shining! I’ve been trying to plot out potential partners for your sister ever since she hit puberty!”

“That’s … very creepy, darling.”

“Oh please, you know that Mare needs to loosen up. And I am quite prepared to find somepony to loosen her up, if you know what I …”

“Cadence, that was almost word for word something that came out of Flash’s mouth. You say something like that again, and I will banish you to the Royal Couch.” Shining said flatly, feeling a twinge of anger as Cadence ignored him again to squee at her chart. “And have you forgotten the reason we’re here? The changelings currently hiding under Celestia's roof?”

That got a reaction from his wife, albeit a muted one. Cadence’s face slackened from a maniacal grin to just a small smirk, and her magical manipulations of her chart slowed to a less-aneurism-inducing speed.

“So, since the pegasi chariots are either in the workshop or have been removed from Canterlot to assist Luna’s Night Guard, and considering we’re supposed to have a fleet of over a hundred of the damn things I sincerely doubt that this is anything more than a ruse from Celestia and her Generals to keep us pinned down and distracted, may I make a suggestion?” The white-coated Unicorn pointed out, trying to repress his frustrations.

It wasn’t Cadence’s fault, after all, that such a ridiculously dangerous enemy was now ensconced in Celestia’s own castle and using Equestria’s laws to protect herself … it wouldn't be fair to make her feel the heat of his frustration just because she'd finally found something to take her mind off of the Changelings and what they'd done to her.

“First thing tomorrow, we book a first-class train-booth to Ponyville and take four Crystal Guards with us as a token escort to go visit my sister and go clear this mess up. Once that’s fixed, we come back here, hopefully with Twilight at our heels and bringing that big, complex brain of hers along for the trip, figure out a way to either abort this trial before it can begin or, failing that miracle, find a way to ensure the Changelings are all isolated from the citizens of Equestria for the rest of their unnatural lives.”

“Segregation, Shining? I thought you despised tribalist ways of thinking.”

“When the Changelings can impersonate any Pony, or even just disguise themselves at will, adopting new physical appearances at will, segregation is the only way we’re going to avoid a mass panic from the populace when they learn that Celestia intends to allow the Changelings to stay in Equestria, regardless of how the trial ends.” Placing a fore-leg around his wife’s shoulders and giving her a gentle squeece, Shining continued to explain. “Even if, through some twist of divine sadism, Chrysalis is honestly looking to make things right, do you really want her to get off scot-free after all the harm, all the malice, she has brought to bear on us directly and Equestria in general?”

“No, she has to pay, if only to send a warning that Equestria will not take such abuse quietly. Shining … I sent a letter to Twilight while we were on the train to Canterlot, asking her to help me find a way to talk aunty Celestia out of this madness, but I’ve not received a response. We might have to assume that Twilight won’t want to help us. You know how hero-worship-y she gets around my aunt.”

“And after what happened at our wedding? I know she thinks the world of Princess Celestia, but Twilight is not a fool, and she’s had more encounters with the Changelings than anypony else. For Faust’s sake, she had to go take on the Changeling Queen with just the other Element Bearers after they kidnapped three Fillies from Ponyville! And fought Chrysalis one-on-one, with not a Royal Guard within a hundred miles to call up, and then Twilight dropped a castle on the chitin-covered monster. If that doesn’t just scream ‘Changelings go home’, I don’t know what does.”

“Technically, Chrysalis ponynapped the Cutiemark Crusaders …”

“Okay, so Chrysalis is not only evil, but woefully under-informed about some of the most dangerous Ponies in the kingdom. Blissful ignorance doesn’t excuse gleeful malice, you know that.”

“Oh, I don’t forgive her one bit, Shining dear, but that’s not my concern at this moment. By now we should have either had a panicked letter back from Twilight, or a positively incendiary Celestia bearing down on us asking why we’re trying to turn Twilight against her.” Cadence leaned into Shining’s embrace and wrapped a wing around him in turn, and for a few moments the two shared the simple, wordless comfort of each other’s presence and warmth. “The silence frightens me, Shining. Twilight should have responded in some fashion by now, and the fact that we haven’t even gotten so-much as post-it note back is very abnormal for Twilight.”

“So if we take that knowledge and combine it with the news that Twilight has decided to become either bisexual or a lesbian, just weeks after a monumentally life-changing event like becoming an entirely new species … it doesn’t look good, Shining. This is a crucial time for Twilight’s development as an Alicorn, both for Immortal and political reasons, and the last thing anypony needs is potentially the most magically gifted of the alicorns twisting her aspect from Magic to Magical Sex. We’ve already got enough population issues without Twilight ‘fixing’ things.”

“So the chart is …” Shining asked softly, trailing a hoof along a length of red twine that led from Twilight to a piece of paper bearing the name of one of her friends, noting that there were scores of similar post-it notes arrayed around Twilight. His mind reeled at the implications of some of those connections, and some of them just flat-out caused his imagination to recoil in horror as his subconscious reflexively gave him imagery of said Ponies making out with his sister.

“The chart displays the most likely individuals in Ponyville who could establish a romantic rapport with Twilight under the current situation. Honey, you remember back at the Crystal Empire I sealed off a small section of the western wing that used to be a library for my personal use? Well, that room alone is bigger than your parents’ house, and I converted it into a ‘shipping room’ so I could accurately keep track of every potential soul-mate and romantic partner Twilight could realistically have access to. There are literally that many Ponies out there that I needed so much space to map out potential links and … well, let’s be honest, Cupid could fire every arrow he’s got into your sister’s backside and she would still be more interested in a dictionary than a dong.”

“…Thank you for that lovely mental image, Cadence. That said, have we considered my sister might have just snapped under all the stress, and this is a purely physical fling to work her frustrations out in a healthy manner?”

“Maybe on behalf of the other party, but from Twilight’s perspective …?”

“True, she’s very much a sappy romantic at heart. Something to do with somepony filling her head with ‘mushy stuff’ waaaay back when.”

“Excuse me? I am the Princess of Mushy Stuff, and you’d better respect that, buster!”

“Hey, I like mushy stuff, you of all Ponies know that, or did you forget how I finally popped the question to you? But you do have to admit that Twilight can interpret things very … literally. I will admit to sometimes wondering if we might have set the bar too high for Twilight to find a partner with how we … went about things.” Shining pointed out, nuzzling the side of Cadence’s muzzle as she pouted at him. “Born of doting parents, one of whom willingly cast aside her Noble status to be with her love, baby-sat by a Princess, taken on as the personal student of another Princess, one who runs the entire country and who literally makes the heavens move on command, and she’s got a dragon as a baby brother because she’s one of the most powerful Unicorns the world has seen since Starswirl the Bearded. If we didn’t know her, we’d assume she was the sort of godawful sues that keep popping up in romantic fiction aimed at teenagers.”

“Well then, it’s a good thing we’re heading to Ponyville first thing tomorrow morning to see just who Twilight’s decided to share her life with.”

“Cadence, I’m sure it’s just a temporary thing.”

“… Shining, there’s no shame in loving somepony of the same gender.”

“Or of a different race, while we’re on the subject, Cadence, but this is my sister. She’s straight. As an arrow. If she's happy with somepony, I don't really care what gender, or even species, they are, but my sister has always been straight, and suddenly switching teams, while all of this is going down, makes me wonder if there isn't something else going on.”

“And a virgin. So really, her sexuality is mostly conjecture up until she gets her privates pounded.”

“CADENCE! That’s my sister, eeeeeeew!”

“Actually, that raises a valid question: Do you think Twilight’s been in the closet all this time, or is she simply noticing how wonderfully soft another Mare’s body can be?”

“How would you know that?! Wait, no, back up and tell me when this happened, preferably with pictures!”

“Uhm, I never actually … you do remember our first time, right?”

“It’s sort of etched into my brain, Cadence. You don't make share yourself with the love of your life and forget it, especially not when said love of my life is you.”

“Well … you remember how I used to be super-huggy when we first met? And I used to hug your mother a lot …”

“…Oh dear sweet Faust, no. We are not having this conversation anymore. No. No no no no, a hundred times no.”

“It was just a silly filly’s crush! Shining! Get back here!”

“Oh hell no. I am going to go get a servant to get me some of Celestia’s strongest spirits and drink until the fact you were trying to feel up my mother is firmly erased from my memories.”

“She’s an attractive mare, Shining! Just because she's your mother doesn't magically negate that fact!”

“WE ARE NOT HAVING THIS CONVERSATION!”

Chapter 59

CHAPTER 59

Twilight held Spike, comforting the small Drake as he cried into her neck, her own eyes red with tears and the after-effects of yesterday’s ‘test’, while Luna stood over Rarity’s bed, her horn aglow with magic as she probed the comatose Unicorn’s mind.

“Nothing. Not a trace, a speck, a whiff of the Nightmare Spirit, the same as when I saw her during the argument over her guilt in the cake debacle. Even if her … claim … that the Nightmare Spirit had become embedded into her subconscious self was true, I would have sensed something.” Luna said after several long minutes, her expression one of fatigue and concern. “One does not undergo such a traumatic fusion without showing some signs, both physical and spiritual, and unincarnate spirits like the Nightmares have a very specific astral ‘scent’ that is impossible to hide in such close proximity, let alone the physical transformation such a joining would have unleashed. Her psyche is traumatized, but not in fashion that a foreign entity intergrating into it would cause.”

“Then it was just a … a bad dream she had?” Spike asked in a raw voice, peering out from under Twilight’s short mane, red eyes roving over the immobilized Rarity before returning to Luna’s face. Desperate, mournful eyes that made Luna feel the press of guilt even stronger than she had before.

“More like a psychotic episode.” The Lunar Princess sighed and backed away from the former Bearer of Generosity, and turning her face away from the young Drake’s gaze. “I can personally attest to the … the word is wrong, there is no word in modern Equish that has the right meaning, but this is the best translation I can use. I can attest to the efficiency of the Elements in bringing one’s mind crashing down when they withdraw from a Bearer. If the visions you saw during the argument were simply the final straw, Twilight, then it is entirely likely that Lady Rarity has been suffering minor clashes with her Element for months at the very least, and having Generosity rip itself out of her psyche during a moment of extreme stress has taken those internal flaws and turned them into a mental crevasse. And once she slipped into the dream-scape, her conscious mind has fallen into this crevasse and fractured.”

“So is this a permanent change, or is there hope?” The young Drake pressed Luna for answers.

“I do not know. On one hoof, this could be an isolated incident since she was only bound to a single Element of Harmony while I was bound to three, and she will recover with aid to be the Pony you both know and love. On the other hoof … this could simply be the tip of the ice-berg of what Lady Rarity will face before the conclusion of her troubles.” Luna gazed at the comatose Unicorn again and shook her head before moving towards her lover and the young Drake, wrapping a wing around the smaller Alicorn and a hoof around the much young, crying dragon. “I will ask my flock assigned here to retreat from Lady Rarity for a short while, most of the Guards I will array around the town to act as sentries, but Moonbeam and two Night Guard will be assigned to Lady Rarity’s side at all times to … to protect her from Ponyville’s more … intolerable inhabitants, as well as herself should she suffer another psychotic episode.”

“I will also ask my sister if she can send one of Happy Place’s co-workers down to Ponyville to oversee Lady Rarity’s counselling for the immediate future. I … think it might be best if Lady Rarity is allowed to remain in a place she knows well and feels safe to be confined in during these trying times, rather than being whisked away to a foreign place where she has no control and is surrounded by strangers.”

“That’s … all we can do right now, I guess.” Twilight sighed after a few moments of quiet in the room, broken only by Rarity’s deep breathing and Spikes sniffling. “We keep her happy, we keep her safe, we wait till the experts tell us what to do next and take baby steps until Rarity’s able to walk on her own.”

It felt like the longest walk of Twilight’s life as she and Luna left the boutique, convincing Spike that leaving him with Rarity in her current state would put both of them at risk should her grip on reality slip again, and informing the Thestral Flock of the change in plans, the long, slow walk back to the library giving Twilight plenty of unwanted thinking time.

Yesterday, everything was fine. Well, chaotic and stressful, but for a day in Ponyville, that’s not exactly a surprise. But this … we’ve not faced anything like this! Even when Discord turned our Harmony into Disharmony, we were altered but still ourselves, just the very worst versions of ourselves. Yet now Rarity is …

Twilight didn’t want to finish that thought. She felt as if doing so would make the horrors Rarity was enduring now somehow … more real.

Yet all I’ll do if I pursue that line of thinking is just avoid my own pain, while Rarity can’t escape her own. Some ‘Princess of Friendship’ I am, huh.

The newest Alicorn told herself it was just the strain of trying to navigate Ponyville in the gloom of the late night sky, covered with clouds that had come swooping in from the Everfree Forest sometime during the night, that was causing her eyes to water. Spike would probably break down on the spot if she gave in and started crying as well, and she needed to be strong for Spike right now.

And Faust only knew what the Elements might do to her friends, especially with Twilight’s Ascension still in the very beginning of its changes, if she somehow failed both Friendship and Generosity and they decided to up and switch hosts again. Or worse still, if the rejection altered her Ascension, and she became the Alicorn of Madness and Despair, or something worse still.

Is that what’s going to happen? My friends ‘slip up’, their Elements abandoned them and latch onto me, and I spend the rest of their lives caring for my closest friends who have been broken because they didn’t meet up to some arbitrary, impossible divine standard? An eternity walking a mental tightrope, hoping the Elements don’t drive me insane from trying to live up to their unreasonable expectations, or drive me insane when I fail and they rip themselves out of my psyche and shatter my mind in turn?

The presence of Magic, that absurdly subtle spiritual weight that had only been so recently revealed to her, began to make itself known, throbbing with what Twilight could only describe as sympathy and sorrow in the back of her mind, while Generosity sulked even further back and spat out feelings of anger and a strange sense of justification, and the two Elements exchanged bickering flashes of emotions too fast and too alien for Twilight to grasp between one another, giving Twilight the mother of all headaches on-top of the lingering pain her first real binge with alcohol as her mind began to fill up with the argument between the two Elements.

And you two! Stop that! This is my head, and I’ve enough going on without you two starting a fight inside my brain! Equis doesn’t need an insane Alicorn with absolute dominion over magic running around!

Magic gave a burst of soothing light in the back of Twilight’s mind, somehow grabbed Generosity, who was very unhappy about it from the way the new ‘hitch-hiker’ in Twilight’s head seethed with anger, and then the two Elements just … vanished. Which was, in itself, very disturbing. If the Elements could just obscure themselves from Twilight’s mind, even when she was now consciously aware of their presence, that meant they could be watching her at any moment, or subtly controlling her without any warning whatsoever. If they hadn’t been doing that to her and her friends already.

Does that mean Magic was watching as Luna and I … aaaaaaaah! I have a pervy fragment of Creation in my head! What else has it been watching since I became a Bearer! Does it watch me when I go to the toilet! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Apparently whatever veil Magic had used to hide itself and the other Element while they argued in Twilight’s mind was not entirely fool-proof, because now Twilight caught snatches of hysterical amusement and frantic bursts of apology and denial from … somewhere in her head. Which while momentarily amusing still did nothing to calm Twilight’s anxiety about having two more minds occupying the back of her head!

“At least nothing worse can await us tomorrow …” Twilight moaned out loud as they finally came within sight of her library, her sanctuary.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Trixie itched.

It wasn’t something like fleas on her coat, or an irritant on her skin. No, it was the presence of another one of her kind, several of them no less, triggering instincts and biological processes that Trixie had hoped a life of wandering the roads of Equestria, away from her kith and kin, would have minimized the chances of encountering and made it easier for her to track down the rare few Scrolls of Weeaboo that had made their way to Equestria over the centuries, and engineer a retro-spell from the original Curse that had made the Spear-Maidens in the first place.

Unfortunately, the Cutiemark Crusaders were the most obvious, and agonizing source. Sadly just a few months too young for Trixie to sate her urges with, and she could agonizingly hear them giggling to each other from the other side of the guest-bedroom door, the scent of their arousal like a fog of musk that clawed away Trixie’s already-flagging willpower. There was at least one more of her kind somewhere within Ponyville, Trixie’s body had sensed them each and every time she had come to Ponyville, but her previous actions, and the attitude of the townsfolk towards her, had hardly been conductive to a courtship, however short-lived.

Cleaning up the Crusaders’ ‘residue’ in the bathroom had been a torture in and of itself, but the fact that Trixie had been unable to take her own matters in hoof, so to speak, and then had left puttering around the house after the Thestrals had come and roused Spike, Princess Luna and Mistress Twilight so late at night that the chaos had thrown Trixie into stubborn wakefulness, and trying to clean the library to find something to do with her hooves had eventually led to her listening on the other side of the door as the three young mares played with each other in bed.

Apparently they had either forgotten, or chosen to ignore, her warnings about the, for lack of a better term, extreme fertility that Weeaboo’s Curse had inflicted upon them. Hopefully young Sweetie Belle had remembered the contraception spell, but Trixie had been able to keep a small amount of her ‘morning tea’ despite the long journey to Ponyville. Not having anything but the clothes on her back had also done wonders for keeping her supply intact, as it was rather hard to brew tea when one didn’t even have a kettle.

Would that they were a few months older … Trixie cursed mentally and groaned as the wave of musk from the other side of the door grew fresher, along with two voices giving vent to happy moans, and the third a soft sound of surprise. How much relief could she gain from joining with three of her kind at once? I would greatly enjoy showing them all the tricks I have picked up over the years, and I dare say they’d be quick, eager students if the gusto they’ve shown today is any indication.

Yet Mistress Twilight would despise me, if not for taking three underage Ponies, however ready, under her roof, then for possibly exposing them to whatever lingering curse-magic that Sunset Shimmer has embedded in me.

And that conjured memories that did little to cool Trixie’s already raging libido. Sunset Shimmer had been so lost and alone when she shuffled into Featherbrook, and Trixie had merely thought the other Unicorn’s story of a ‘relic’ accidentally transforming her as perfectly believable, given what Trixie herself had suffered at the malignant will of the alicorn amulet, and Trixie had been more than willing to share her research with Sunset, to remove Weeaboo's curse from them both and finally make them 'normal' Mares.

Pleasant days studying the scroll she had recovered with Sunset at her side, and even more pleasant nights as Trixie taught Sunset how to care for her new body, and how to sate the cravings their proximity to one another caused within both Mares. Sunset had been a clumsy, awkward but ultimately giving lover, at least at first, and Trixie had been more than happy to share her time and her bed with the new ‘sister’ of their strange little curse.

It had made waking up to find Sunset trying to sneak out of Trixie’s wagon with the Spell-Scroll in the dark of the pre-dawn all the more cutting. And the duel over the scroll had trapped them in those abominable magical outfits for weeks, and forced Trixie and Sunset to remain trapped together, unable to escape one another, nor the wretched impulses caused by staying so close to one of their own kind caused to bubble up uncontrollably. What had been an act of giving freely had instead turned into a contest to see who could take more from the other, and just thinking about what she had done to Sunset, and what Sunset had done to Trixie, made the show-mare sick to her stomach even as her body throbbed with the memories.

And yet, that was possibly some of the best sex you ever had, Trixie. The blue show-mare though to herself bitterly as she slunk away from the door, an effort that took all of her willpower as the soft voices of the trio on the other side of the door became throatier and louder, the slap of flesh on flesh and the soft thump of the bed-head banging against the wooden wall all painted a picture of three little fools lost in their own hormones and the effects of Weeaboo’s Curse.

It had been magnificent sex, if Trixie was truly honest with herself. Sunset had been a willing student and inventive in her own right once she had come to see some of the benefits of her new state of being, but there had been a edge of cruelty, a need to be the ‘top’ that had unnerved Trixie at times, a sense of danger that Trixie had just hoof-waved away as the other Mare being consumed with the intoxication of the new pleasure she could experience, but the travel from Gryphon territory back to Equestria, a long trip to begin with when one did not have access to wings and had to negotiate the many switch-back trails to get back to Pony territory, and the trains that criss-crossed the country, had shown Trixie the truth once the two former-lovers had been forced by the accidents caused during their duel to remain by each other’s side.

Sunset liked being dominant, craved it even, and she liked pain, both receiving it and even more so when dishing it out. And if Sunset Shimmer truly was a fiend and not just physically warped by whatever magical item she had come into contact with, then Trixie held a great and terrible fear for her future.

In the chaos between Mistress Twilight undoing the mess of spells that had trapped Sunset Shimmer and Trixie together for weeks and the horrible moment when the Canterlot Magi had slapped the infernal golden collar around her neck in the wake of the succuponi’s rampage, Trixie had cast spells determined to check her body for injuries and for ‘accidents’, given that she and Sunset had been repeatedly blowing load after load inside each other constantly for almost a month, and hermaphrodites were notorious for being able to fall pregnant at any time of year, where normal Ponies had to wait for the ‘spring madness’, or use fertility spells and potions to trigger an estrus outside of their normal breeding period.

And Trixie’s worst fears had been realized: She was pregnant, and if she was, then Sunset Shimmer was likely in the same boat. And if Sunset was truly a Demon, then their children could also be fiendish in turn.

Yet if she told anypony, they would likely attempt to abort the children to preserve the rest of Equestria. Whatever else Trixie might have been or had become, she would not, could not destroy an innocent life, especially life that had sprung from her own loins, it had been her family’s creed for as long as the living members could remember, to take pains to prevent unwanted pregnancies, but to never destroy those lives that did manage to take root inside a Lulamoon or one of their partners. Surely the Princesses could find a way to purge the demonic traits of the children as they would cure Trixie … and maybe Sunset Shimmer too.

What if … Sunset could be cured, not just of her demonic nature, but her hate, her rage? Trixie pondered that thought as she stopped at the bottom of the stairs, looking to the kitchen, and then the entrance to the basement, thinking hard.

There was little love lost between the two after their travel to find Twilight, and while the sex had been mind-blowing, in every sense of the word, Trixie knew that both Sunset and herself would need significant help to be able to reconnect like they once had … and maybe that was for the best. Trixie had no intention of playing second-fiddle to anypony but Mistress Twilight, and Sunset Shimmer showed a disturbing preference for violence and cruelty that would only warp a Foal’s mind into a similar twisted outlook on life.

If Sunset was pregnant like Trixie was. If the Princesses could cure whatever fiendish traits the children had inherited from their mothers. If the Princesses would grant Trixie full custody of the children, and not force Sunset and Trixie to share custody, a fate that the blue show-mare shuddered as she remembered how many times Sunset’s teeth had left marks in Trixie’s skin, not in lust or passion, but dominance and knowing attempts to inflict pain and fear.

Whatever happens, I will not allow anypony, anything, to harm you. Trixie promised, placing a fore-hoof to her belly before heading towards the kitchen to brew up a pot of ‘morning tea’ for the Crusaders. Not even Mistress Twilight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“More tea?” Discord asked, pouring a stream of hot tea from an upside-down tea-pot into an equally physics-defying cup, the liquid splashing up into the cup and billowing aromatic steam around and up the upturned rim.

“Mmmm, thank you, Discord.” Celestia smiled, taking the cup with her magic and deftly flipping it right-side up before the liquid could spill out, then held a wing outstretched for Discord to sit next to her, an offer the serpentine chimera took gleefully, the two beings wrapping a wing around one another and settling down to watch the evening news.

Which seemed to consist of nothing but Stump, Murdock and the Muck Rakers trying desperately to spin everything Celestia had said this morning into the most negative, incompetent drivel they could.

It was actually cute, once one took a certain emotional distance from whom they were trying to defame, but Celestia took it in stride, and Discord, once he got over an urge to go deliver the offending parties to a small corner of the Chaos Realm he liked to call ‘the-think-about-what-you’ve-done-before-I-call-Cthuluh-over-to-discuss-it-with-you corner’, the two settled down to watch what Celestia had dubbed ‘the duck-shoot hour’.

“Shocking information that Princess Celestia has been putting all Ponykind at risk to appease the lesser races …”

“Aaaaand filing speciest charges against Channel 47 … again” Princess Celestia scratched the time and news-anchor’s name down on a pad as Disco summoned a pair of bingo-cards and waited till Celestia was free before handing it off to her.

“First person to call ‘bingo’ gets to eat the last tub of ice-cream.” The Chaos-God offered, chortling as Celestia gave him an evil look and accepted the card, and the challenge, with a wicked smile.

Flicking to the next channel, they were greeted by a poorly dubbed-over video of Celestia, with the voice-actor, who sounded nothing at all like Celestia, began shouting inane slogans that the time for the Ponies of Equestria to take control of the country back from her filled the air.

“Good Faust, do they think I honest sound like I’ve been figged?” The Solar Princess spat out a mouthful of tea and then began chortling. “While I am slightly concerned Ponies who’ve never actually heard me speak might believe this, the fact they didn’t even match up what she’s saying to the movements of my mouth should clue most Ponies in.”

“You know, I’d ask what figging is, but quite frankly, it sounds horrible and even I have things I’d rather not know.” Discord mumbled, flicking the channel over again, and both immortals blinked, slowly, as a florid, red-faced Unicorn who looked like he’d lived off donuts and cream-cheese since he’d been weaned off the teat sat in-front of a picture of Celestia’s face that had been marred with a red circle with a strike through it, and was screaming about how Celestia was destroying the moral fabric of the country with her ‘lax’ attitude to the immigrants ‘streaming’ into the country and her refusal to stand down from power.

“Aaaaand another front-page advertisement in the Canterlot Gazette pointing out our intake of refugees and immigrants is actually slowing down, because I’ve been helping the other nations of the world achieve stability and peace and thus there’s no need for people to try to illegally enter from most of our neighbouring countries?”

“I think I’ve actually got ‘gibbering, fear-mongering idiot’ on my bingo-card here, somewhere …”

Click

“… and amidst terrifying revelations that Princess Celestia has been gambling with the fate of the nation because ‘war is terrible’, the questions that we have to ask: Should she stand down for this gross negligence, and how can we be sure she will not turn the power of the sun against us to cling to her tyrannical seat of power!”

“Oh my me …” Discord muttered, and pressed the remote again.

Click

“Gold armor? What, was she thinking? A mare with her colouration should only wear a little gold, an accent, not a suit of the damn stuff!”

“Agreed, and it is high time the Ponies of Canterlot saw where their taxes are going. For shame!”

“My armor is forged from celestial metal not found on this world. Literally. It is in all the history books, confirmed by the best metallurgists of this era and countless others. It just looks gold-like.” Celestia sighed and put a hoof to her head. “What next, they’ll complain the armor makes my butt look big?”

“And did you see what the haunch-plates did for her rear? Setting unrealistic standards of beauty for our easily-influenced fillies is hardly befitting a supposedly motherly monarch!”

“…. Another channel?”

“Please.”

Click

“And on the latest news …”

“Oh dear Faust, no …”

“It appears all is not well with Princess Luna and Princess Twilight down in Ponyville! Highly-placed sources have indicated that there may be some sort of internal dispute amongst the Elements of Harmony and …”

“Bearers, you halfwits. The Bearers of the Elements of Harmony.” Celestia grated before taking a soothing sip of tea while Discord rubbed her back. “I’ll have to check on that tomorrow, I know Luna asked for a flock of her Thestrals, but I assumed she just wanted to provide some Guards that listened for her orders first.”

“And we have this exclusive footage of a Unicorn, presumed to be one Rarity Belle, being carried out of the Golden Oaks Library in a full-body cast, where Princess Twilight lives as an example to all of our Royals, living on a government wage and working a nine-to-five job like the rest of us, and apparently where Rarity Belle was involved in an altercation with another Element of Harmony.”

Discord had the high honor of actually witnessing the Divine Overlord of Ponykind utter ‘fuck’ in a very blunt and emphatic tone.

“ …whose identity we cannot confirm at this stage due to the photographer being distracted by a sonic boom, the side-effects of Wonderbolt-in-Training Rainbow Dash’s famous Sonic Rainboom maneuver, which she repeatedly performs over the Everfree Forest, our sources claim, to hone her unique technique. Also, our reporters in the field were able to catch a very rare and oddly public example of a mating-ritual between a female Timberwolf and a very, very large Alpha male of her kind. Experts are confused over why the female seemed unable to walk properly, or why she was so resistant to the male’s approaches, but some are saying it may be a sign of …”

Click

“Are we going to Ponyville tomorrow?” Discord asked softly as the television switched over to yet another channel, thankfully one not streaming distorted news right into their faces.

“Discreetly. Since Dawn-Ray is in technical command after Rosebush’s … display this afternoon, I can tell my little Ponies I am in talks with my experts about finding other potential trans-dimensional ‘holes’ in Equestria.”

“What actually happened to Rosebush? I liked her, a bit more fire and a little more sass in her than in your former Captain of the Guard.”

“She and Cadence have … issues with one another that I had hoped they would be mature enough to deal with by now, but sadly not. And it appears that Chrysalis’s blood-oath to ‘do no harm’ does not also extend to ‘do not sass the volatile super-solider with the fact you boned her ex-boyfriend while wearing the face of the mare that stole him away in the first place, and point out you rocked his world every night for months on end’.” Celestia sighed again and snuggled up against Discord, half smiling, half pouting. “Pity. I really did like the furniture in the red-rooms, cherry-wood is hard to come by these days.”

“Ah, and this would tie into the whole ‘emotions and possessiveness’ angle with … sex and things. I’m beginning to understand why there’s so many Stallions who go monogamous despite the fact that Equestria would gladly see them boning Mares left and right just to keep the population up. I wonder if that makes the ones who do canter from Mare to Mare either very brave, or pitifully suicidal.”

“Herds are more common in the outer rims of Equestria, but there are still quite a few Herds within Canterlot. Prince Blueblood, my … nephew … has quite a large Herd. They’re not always devoted to sex and reproduction, some Herds form simply because the Ponies, and others, involved simply live together platonically, and ‘help’ on another with the Mares’ estruses in Spring.”

“Oh hush, I’m new to all of … this. Still ... I’m surprised you don’t have a Herd.”

Celestia spat her tea again, this time with enough force to turn the liquid into a fine spray that misted into the air.

“Good Faust, no, don't you put that evil on me, Discord! Apart from the fact I don’t like other Mares ‘that way’, consider that Equestria suffers a shortage of Stallions. If I gathered a ‘Herd’ of Stallions around me, imagine the nightmare over who the father would be of any children, who had fathered the next Prince- or Princess-heir apparent of the Solar Throne! Or the outrage from the Mares out there who are struggling to find a male partner, let alone a Stallion to give them foals!” The solar Princess chuckled weakly, going rather pale under her white coat. “I might be an Immortal, but getting annually lynched by outraged, hormonal Mares during spring and summer would most definitely, as the current generation says, suck mightily.”

“Well, you do suck, but I wouldn’t use the term ‘mightily’ to describe it …” Discord offered nonchalantly, and received a throw-pillow to the face for his efforts.

“Oh hush, or I’ll show you mightily suckage.” Celestia retorted, blushing herself now as she levitated the last tub of ice-cream onto another throw-pillow, rested the whole affair on her lap and conjured a spoon, stabbing deep into the triple-chocolate swirl and offering the treat to Discord, whose mis-matched eyes widened in surprised delight before he accepted the offering, the two Immortals snuggling together on the couch, the television quickly forgotten.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“THERE IT IS AGAIN!” Cadence bellowed, sitting bolt-upright on the couch, her face obscured being a sleeping mask.

From across the room, the door to the master bedroom opened and a pillow awash in Shining Armor’s purple-red magic was hurled at her, knocking her sleeping mask askew.

“Go to sleep!”

“But honey, I can feel such strong love-magic … or would you prefer if I called them ‘Love-Love Waves’, Shiney?”

Shining Armor’s response was a strangled, angry noise that no equine throat should have been able to produce, followed by a literal barrage of pillows flying out of the master bedroom until the only thing that was visible of Princess Cadence was the very tip of her horn, penetrating through a dainty silk pillow.

Well, at least I’ll have something soft to sleep on. Cadence mused as she arranged the pillows into a suitable mattress and tried to go to focus on the source of the love she could feel in the air, but it remained at once both hauntingly familiar but too … omnipresent to get a proper lock-on for Cadence's senses to determine who, or from what direction, the waves of love were coming from. Definitely not that bug-bitch, Chrysalis, but who then?

I’ll have to ask Aunty Celestia if there’s any juicy gossip about love-birds in the castle tomorrow morning before we leave for Ponyville.

Chapter 60

CHAPTER 60

“Well, this is awkward.” Shining sighed, staring out the window of the nicest carriage on the ‘Ponyville Express’ with his wife on one side, and Adamant and Flash Sentry sitting on the other bench across the small room … and half a dozen reporters crammed against the private room’s interior wall and door, hammering on the glass and demanding interviews and exclusives, with their cameras trying to peer around the edges of the blinds that Adamant had, in a flash of insight, drawn down to prevent unauthorized pictures being taken when the other two Crystal Guards on duty screamed about being over-run by paparazzi. From the far end of the hallway.

And even that wasn’t entirely guaranteed to work, given that at least two of the reporters had Stump Corp. access cards hanging around their necks, as did about a dozen or so Pegasi who were racing the train, trying to pull up next to the Royals’ window to get that one incriminating shot. If Stump was involved, odds were there’d be illegal, magically-augmented lenses on the cameras that would be able to penetrate solid material to get a photo regardless of what type of physical barriers were put in place for privacy.

“Well, at the very least, surely we’ve left most of the reporters back in Canterlot. After Celestia releasing the information that the Changeling Queen is confined to the Castle and that Sunset Shimmer is trapped in the Cell of Ultimate Confinement, I’d expect that Stump and Murdock will be focusing most of what they’ve got on trying to get a camera into the Castle to get a scoop.” Flash Sentry pointed out, flaring a wing up against a slight gap between the blind and the window-frame where one dementedly determined reporter was flashing away with a camera. “That just leaves us with a few diehards from Murdock and Stump’s camps, and of course the Muckrakers’ crews, to try and get their happy-snaps, and their Ponies aren’t nearly at the level of the Murdocks or Stumps.”

“Perhaps I’m speaking out of turn, sir, ma’am, but I cannot believe the Ponies here are so disrespectful to the Princesses! It’s absolutely unthinkable!” Adamant snorted, slamming a hoof against his share of the window and making the Ponies on the other side jump back in alarm. “I cannot understand why this is allowed to happen.”

“Adamant, Princess Celestia is over five thousand years old … she has always told me that she’s seen what happens when a leader, even a good one, has nobody to say them no or point out their mistakes. I will heartily agree she’s allowed the media to become too hostile and toxic, but you have to understand, we Alicorns are Immortal.” Now Cadence spoke, a sad smile spreading across her face as she explained the situation to her loyal Crystal Guard. “Unlike a mortal leader, whose mistakes can be corrected by other mortals, our mistakes can last for centuries, if not longer, and have the weight of divinity behind them.”

“Imagine how much damage we could do if we are never questioned, never challenged? If we come to believe that we can do no wrong because nopony ever spoke against us, for good or ill, and began to lose sight of our fallibility? For all the conflict between Celestia and myself right now, I still believe that she speaks the truth, at least in this particular case.”

Adamant grimaced but nodded, while Flash Sentry just rolled his eyes, then grunted as Adamant kicked him in the shins, Shining Armor elbowed him in the ribs and Cadence levitated a pillow over his head and whacked him with it.

Sighing again, Shining looked out the window and grimaced as the flock of Pegasi reporters, so focused on their attempts to get a good photo of the Royals in their private room, failed to notice the sign advertising Donut Joe’s ‘Mane Six Special’ deluxe box speeding ever closer as the train steamed its way to Ponyville, before the enter flock slammed into the broad, painted wooden sign with a crunch that was audible even within the carriage and over the train’s rumbling.

It was going to be a very, very long day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So Rares is currently koo-koo for coco-puffs an’ we’re waiting for this ‘Happy Place’ pony to come an’ fix her? Right. Jus’ perfect.” Applejack grunted angrily, taking a hearty swig of coffee and apparently burning the back of her throat in the process from the sounds she made afterwards. “’An’ just because we all ain’t got enough problems, ontop o’ that I jus’ ran into three Fillies whom smell like they jus’ did a week-long tour of a brothel. What next, the Caribou invade?”

“As bad as what the Crusaders were doing to each other while we were out, what’s happening to Rarity is even worse. Our friend is convinced that Nightmare Rarity is back and has fused with her mind. She’s alternating between being the sweet, giving Mare we all know and love, a paranoid wreck demanding that we all apologise to her or she’ll slander us to the far side of Equestria and back again, to a gibbering, terrified child screaming about the monster in her mind that’s trying to literally ooze out of her skin.” Twilight explained to an ashen-faced crowd of friends who had once-again crammed themselves into her kitchen. Even Pinkie Pie seemed serious for once despite having curly hair, which was almost a miracle in and of itself, although Twilight was also certain it was possibly the first sign of the apocalypse. “We’ve got Luna’s Bat-Ponies keeping watch on her to make certain Rarity doesn’t hurt herself, or another Pony for that matter, but for the time being, I’m asking for all of us to have a moratorium on using the Elements of Harmony and … well, if anyone is having any strange thoughts, any weird impulses to do things relating to their specific Element, let one of your friends know about it.”

“Well, I am feeling a little guilty about what I did to Rarity … and your front door.” Rainbow offered awkwardly, but Twilight shook her head.

“That’s normal, natural even, Rainbow. Rarity is our friend, it would be bizarre for anypony, especially you, to not feel guilty after putting her into a full-body cast after the disaster that was the Cake's cake. No, I’m talking about something like what Rarity has apparently experienced a few times before she ‘broke’ yesterday: A naturally generous, empathic Pony turning inexplicably selfish and hostile to the point of self-destructing in-front of us, something that’s almost a complete inversion of one’s character without needing Discord or some other external force to make the change.” The purple Alicorn explained, levitating small journals towards everypony. “I’ve been going back over my own actions and thoughts, as far as I can recall, and trying to figure out if and when I’ve been acting ‘against’ Magic, and I want all of you to do the same.”

“And before you ask, no, I won’t be reading the journals. That’s for Happy Place, the Royal Psychologist, who won’t tell anypony else what you’re writing in them. Anything you discuss with her will remain private, even from the Princesses. All of the Princesses.”

Her friends, her remaining friends, all took their journals from Twilight’s levitation, eyeing the books with trepidation or in the case of Applejack, anger. It was obvious that Applejack was still upset over what had happened to the Crusaders, but at least she wasn’t acting on her grudge while Rarity was … incapacitated.

“Where’s Luna, by the way?” Rainbow Dash asked Twilight softly as the other three Ponies in the room wandered out of the kitchen to have a discussion of their own, a discussion that had plainly been one Twilight wasn’t invited to by the expressions on Pinkie’s and Applejack’s faces when Twilight had gotten up to follow them.

“Luna decided that she wanted to have a moment to herself, Faust knows I understand, we’ve been either joined at the cutiemark or getting under each other’s hooves since the moment Princess Celestia sent us both out to the Everfree Forest.” Getting her friend another cup of tea, Twilight ran herself through the calming breathing exercises over and over again. Everything was spiralling out of control, her friends were … Calm down, Twilight. This is huge, and the Princess who knew what the Elements could do to us told us nothing about it for three years. They’ve every right to be angry with Celestia, and even you and Luna, given that Luna is Celestia’s sister and I am her ‘prized’ student.

“And she just … left you with Trixie the Dickmare? Who may or may not be infectious with either the dickmare thing or the succubi curse, or maybe secretly working for the Succuponi who tried to convert you against your will in the first place?” Rainbow asked, looking somewhere between shocked and amused. “Said dickmare who apparently wants to introduce you to her magic wand, repeatedly and at … length?”

“Uuuuuuuuuuuuugh, that joke got old really quick, you know? Considering that Trixie’s proving herself to be an asset and I am supposed to be trying to tell her that Luna and I are together on my own, rather than keep relying on Luna to do the harsh things in this relationship?” The purple Alicorn groaned and put her muzzle onto the kitchen table for a moment. “Dash, you’re supposed to have had more mare- and colt-friends than all of Ponyville put together …”

“Oh geeze, backhoof compliments, how can I refuse?”

“Just … look … you’ve dated a lot more than I have, so tell me how I tell somepony who is very much into me that I’m very much against them getting into me in any way, shape or form?”

“Just mare-up and tell Trixie ‘it’s not me, it’s you and your cervix crusher’.”

“Rainbow, I am trying to avoid kick-starting another disaster, not encouraging Trixie to fall off the friendship wagon and try to enslave Ponyville again. Besides, up until a few days ago, Luna and I were both very much straight Mares. I’m not sure if this thing with Luna is just us being really good friends and Luna being so giving and … and the fantastic sex, or if I really am bisexual and it took accidentally sparking with a Goddess to tumble us both out of the closet.”

“How … fantastic are we talking here?”

“Uhm, at the risk of sharing too much?” Twilight blushed and traced a hoof across the top of the kitchen table. “Fantastic enough that Lotus and Aloe caught us in the steam room ... and we didn’t stop. I am kicking myself for never trying sex-stuff up until now.”

“Wait. Wait wait wait wait wait. I kind of guessed you were a virgin up until a week ago, but you never tried … anything? Not even on your own, uh, special touch?”

“Ugh, and now we get to the ‘sharing too much’ part.” Twilight mumbled, but nodded, groaning again as Rainbow Dash's face went through an indescribable series of contortions.

“Twi … you’re a young, hot mare, and you’ve never even hoofed it? How in Faust’s name have you made it through your estruses without some kind of sexual release?”

“Spike sleeps in the same bedroom as I do, Rainbow. Ewwww, no, there are some things I want my baby brother to remain ignorant of, so I basically just toughed my ‘spring madness’ out rather than risk traumatizing Spike. And I was all but raised by Princess Celestia, so imagine trying to diddle your bean with the knowledge that the personification of everything good about our species is just a few rooms away and you’re full of the belief she knows exactly what you’re doing, and the virginal goddess of the light and all things holy disapproves mightily of you being ‘naughty’.”

“Virginal?”

“She … gives off the aura of unblemished purity. I, of course, am old enough now to know that’s not the case, I mean, the various Princes and Princesses over the centuries shows she’s at least had enough sex to produce offspring, but … look, let’s just say I have had no privacy for that kind of thing until I moved to Ponyville, Pinkie’s inevitable and unstoppably random entrances at unfortunate moments notwithstanding … and no interest in exploring anything to do with sex until Luna and I crossed horns and accidentally sparked each other silly.”

“Have you considered that maybe, just maybe … it’s just normal sex, and you’re just thinking its great sex because you’ve never … had anything other experiences?”

Twilight blinked and looked at Rainbow as if she’d grown a second head, mouth opening and closing for several seconds before steam exploded out of Twilight’s ears, and she turned from purple to incandescent pink.

“WHA-WHA-WHAAAAAT?”

“No, I’m serious here, Twi. You just said you’ve never had an orgasm before you and Luna accidentally got together.” Rainbow winced at how hard she was pushing the ‘accidentally’, but Twilight had just given her possibly the best opening the would-be Wonderbolt was going to get in this situation. “Have you considered you’re just friends-with-benefits, not actual girlfriends? And you said both Luna and you consider yourselves ‘straight’, right? Have either of you ever actually … banged another mare before this all happened? How can you know you’re actually both having great orgasms, not just so-so ones? I mean, Luna might know, but she might not want to say anything since you’ve kind of just started?”

“I … I don’t know if I’d say that. We … ah … well, it all started when Luna and I touched horns accidentally, and we can … sort of feel each other when we do that, do you remember me …”

“Saying something like that back in the Everfree Forest, yeah, but what does that even mean? You can feel each other’s location? Each other’s moods?”

“Not … quite. Imagine there’s a mirror. Now imagine that everything that happens in or to the reflection, you feel as if it is happening to you, and likewise, everything that happens to you, the reflection can feel and experience.”

“…’Kay. So you’re saying you can feeeeeeeeeeeh?” Rainbow’s jaw literally dropped as she finally grasped what the furiously-blushing Twilight was saying. “You’re telling me you two feel each other’s orgasms?”

“Not so loud! Faust! But yes, when we’re snuggling and not fighting the Sympathy, just letting it do what it wants to do, we really just … one of us builds up to an orgasm, which means the other one also does, and then we’re both peaking together, and we’re both so in sync that … I don’t have the words for it, Rainbow.” Blushing, Twilight put her face in her hooves and sighed.

Rainbow sat back in her chair, wings sagging and mouth open. How in bucking tartarus am I supposed to compete against magical alicorn sex-powers?

“Uhm, Rainbow, since you’re willing to talk about all … this … can I ask you a question?”

“Sort of … trying to process that I’ll never have mind-blowing magical unicorn sex because I’m a pegasi, but sure, fire away.” Rainbow replied in a monotone, watching her current plan burn up like so much dead grass in a summer fire.

“Good, great. Uh, at the risk of dragging us back into the ‘too much information’ part of the conversation … is it normal for a mare to ‘squirt’ when we’re …”

Rainbow groaned and put her face on the table as Twilight, in a adorably nerdy fashion, proceeded to pump her for information about a mare’s body that, had the conversation happened a week before, Rainbow would have happily provided a very physical demonstration of.

And yet … they’re just fumbling about, trusting in this magical malady they’re stuck with. They aren’t really bisexuals, this is just puppy-love and post-orgasm closeness. Rainbow thought to herself as Twilight gushed about being held after sex while Rainbow made thoughtful-sounding “Hmmmm” and “Aaaaah” noises. That doesn’t mean that she’s ever had a real orgasm, just magic-induced ones. I’m still in the game … if she’ll stop crushing my plans by accident!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Your Majesty, you know I’m a loyal servant but this is … somewhat odd.” Dawn Ray muttered, awkwardly shuffling in his new uniform, or rather, a second-hand one that had been left behind when Shining Armor had been ‘reassigned’ to the frozen north.

“Dawn Ray, you are a senior Castle Guard, well known by my soldiers and have the double benefit of being both liked and respected by your comrades. While Rosebush is … absent … you will be a fine Royal Guard Captain in her place. You might even find yourself holding the position permanently if Rosebush’s issues with Cadence and the Changelings cannot be resolved.”

“I was actually referring to the front-page advertisements in the papers and on the radio. A month-long ‘amnesty period’ during which any Changeling who turns themselves in at the Castle proper, where they may apply for citizenship, regardless of their previous actions?” The middle-aged Stallion asked in a tired voice, pointing a hoof to a dozen newspapers scattered across Princess Celestia’s desk, the front pages of which all bearing the same message, and the same symbol, the Sun-and-Moon crest, which identified the message as crown-sponsored and approved.

To falsely use that crest was punishable by treason, and even Stump, Murdock and the Muckrakers hadn’t worked up the stones to test that in the courts yet …

Celestia sighed and sagged a little behind her table before meeting Dawn’s eyes. “Something that Chrysalis has said has been bugging me, if you will pardon the term. She mentioned several times when Stoic Mountain and I were questioning her that she and her sisters came across the Equestrian border decades ago. Yet we have only ever faced Chrysalis’s Hive, a single enclave of Changelings, and she is the only Queen-caste Changeling amongst their number, disguised or not.”

“Ah.” Dawn Ray said, blinking sharply as he considered that little nugget of information.

“Yes, ‘ah’ indeed. And if her claims of some greater evil on the other side of the Badlands is indeed correct and not just a petty attempt to avoid her just punishment, then that means there could be multiple Changeling Hives, hostile enclaves of shape-shifting assassins all perfectly designed by some unknown entity to blend into our species and be nearly undetectable, hostile enclaves within Equestria who may still be loyal to this ‘greater evil’. And we might never identify these enclaves unless we get lucky and a Changeling uses their abilities within range of the detection charms the Magi are creating.” The Princess explained, placing a hoof on the front page of the Stump Times, her frustrated look growing grimmer as she used the hoof to push the front page aside to where the second page of the paper was almost completely dominated by the words ‘Princess on the verge of surrendering Equestria to Changeling Menace?’ greeted Dawn Ray’s eyes. “This is a calculated risk, my loyal Guard. If I can convince the other Changeling Hives to follow Chrysalis’s lead and join Equestria directly, or at least hammer out a peace-accord with their Queens, we stand a better chance of protecting our little Ponies than retaining a confrontational position with these Hives who may or may not still retain ties to the threat Chrysalis speaks of.”

“And if this ‘threat’ across the Badlands is actually real, we might gain access to more … credible … sources of information that Chrysalis.” Dawn Ray muttered, reading the first few lines of paragraphs under the libellous text before rolling his eyes and snorting in disgust. Apparently being ‘forced’ by Royal Decree to print what he was told, and only what he was told, on the front page of his own newspaper had enraged the infamous and clandestine owner of the Stump corporation to the point he had personally write an editorial, and nopony at the paper had had the stones to point out the whole thing came out as stark raving gobbledegook revolving around Princess Celestia’s very existence being a personal insult to the writer’s sense of importance in the world. “But is it worth the cost? We clawed back significant ground from your detractors yesterday, and they’re going to jump on this and take back almost all the headway we made.”

“And that is different from normal how?” Celestia shot back, a hint of a teasing smile on her face.

“Considering all the complaining that is made within the Castle, especially from a certain Princess, about how we never seem to get any respect from the public media, yet you have just painted a bullseye on your flank for those very same ponies?” The Royal Guard-turned-temporary-Captain said with considerable heat, to which Celestia blinked slowly and turned her attention back to the newspaper. “Unless there is some secret, self-destructive plan between yourself and the Royal Public Relations ponies to actively destabilize the country by letting yourself get torn to shreds day in and day out by Stump, Murdock and the Muckrakers to the point we have an armed uprising against the Thrones, I cannot see how this helps us in the slightest other than the slim possibility that Queen Chrysalis, a known antagonistic force towards our country and a scheming liar who was able to fool the entirety of Canterlot for months, might be telling the truth.”

“The alternative is we leave the Changeling Hives as an unknown within Equestria and our allies, and we have no way of knowing if they share a similar modus opperandi to Chrysalis’s Hive.” Celestia pointed out weakly, trailing a hoof over the Royal Seal on the front-page of another paper. “While we are in a position of strength, it would be wise to offer the other Hives a chance to come in under our wing and be protected under the law as official citizens, rather than leave them out amongst the populace, either to continue preying upon our citzens or to become the victims of witch-hunts.”

“And what happens if no Changeling Hives turn themselves in?”

“Then we tell the citizens that Chrysalis’s Hive is the only one in Equestria … and have the Royal Guard and Magi sweep the country with what we can glean from our ‘guests’ to make absolutely certain we are Changeling-free, planting detection wards and runes in as many cities as we can so that any Changelings who refuse to join us openly cannot hide amongst the populace.” Princess Celestia turned and gave Dawn Ray a sad smile as she stood up from behind her desk, her horn glowing and the papers all folding themselves up into a neat pile before putting them in her ‘out’ box. “I have little reason to believe Chrysalis is lying this time, not with all the counter-measures Bleak Mountain and I have put in place to force her to tell the truth. And with how badly injured she is I cannot see the Changeling Queen risking actively antagonising the one nation on Equis who would have few qualms about crushing her and her beloved children if she proves false for a third time.”

Dawn Ray looked at Princess Celestia, then around the Royal Office, noting the many pictures of foreign heads of state, famous philanthropists and heroes of many races and, both past and present. Individuals whom Princess Celestia had lauded and thrown her support behind because they represented harmony, compassion and respect for life.

“Do you honestly believe that? You, of all beings, ‘crushing’ anything if the need arises?”

Princess Celestia was quiet for several seconds, and Dawn Ray mentally kicked himself for asking such a blunt question, while the stallion assumed a parade-stance, expecting to be lectured or even dismissed from his Princess’s presence. It was well known that Celestia abhorred violence and warfare, but history had shown that when push came to shove, the Princess was willing to step onto the battlefield, and there was a smoking crater the size of a small village that had once been a Gryphonian war-camp near the border to prove she did more than just provide moral support.

“ 'Should the need arise?' Yes. With the additional pieces of my Regalia I am currently wearing, I can crush Chrysalis with about as much effort as one would expend stepping on an ant. If I were to don the entirely of my Regalia, Dawn Ray, it is well within power to raze the surface of the world to ash, boil the oceans into steam, set all of the sky ablaze, 'should the need arise'.” The white alicorn said quietly, a haunted expression on her face as she stood up and walked around the table to stand in-front of him, her wings drooping slightly.

“Hence why I am so loathe to wear the Regalia: Should I fall to corruption as other Immortals have, or worse still be driven into a corner by my enemies and lash out without thinking about the consequences, without restraining myself, it would be far too easy for me to wipe out staggering amounts of life in the process, for I control the Sun, Dawn Ray. A sphere of fire and raw power so vast a hundred worlds the size of Equis could disappear into it and the Sun would still remain hungry for more.”

“If I should ever turn to evil, if I should ever become corrupted, then all life on Equis is doomed.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Now Bloom, ah … oh mah stars, ah was hopin’ you’d be a fair bit older a’fore we had this conversation …” Applejack stuttered, mashing her hat between her hooves again and again as the two sisters sat down for ‘the talk’ in a quiet corner of the library, while Pinkie and Fluttershy had likewise taken a Crusader with them for similar discussions.

“Is this about giving the pickle to Sweetie and Scoots? Or about them giving the pickle to me?”

“Faust as mah witness, girl! It’s ‘bout the whole dang thing, an’ y’all are way too young to be buckin’ each other’s brains out!” The older farm-mare exploded, then blushed as four heads turned to give her startled looks. “Y’all gotta cool down an’ stop this … t’aint natural for a mare to have that thing, an’ what’ll y’all do if’n you get yourselves pregnant?”

“Trixie sat us down and explained that we’ll … be really, really hungry for sex because of the spell’s effects. An’ the aphrodisiacs in the cake ain’t really helpin’ either.” Appleblom said slowly, and it irked Applejack to no end that her sister could be so calm in the face of her older sister’s frustration and anger. “She’s taught Sweetiebelle a charm to help us avoid knockin’ each other up, an’ shown me how to make a tea to drink to keep our bellies flat. Ain’t the best solution, ah get that Applejack, but it ain’t like we’re jus’ bein’ silly and leavin’ dents in the headboard without thinkin’ about the consequences.”

“This is worse than mah first estrus last year. Ah can’t just diddle the bean till ah blow off some steam an’ get back to mah chores. The cravin’s jus’ don’t stop unless ah’m in one o’ the other girls, or they’re in me, so the best thing ah can do is make sure we ain’t gonna ruin our futures while miss Twilight fixes this mess.” The younger mare put a hoof to her cheek and sighed heartily. “Ain’t what ah thought mah week was gonna be like, but at least all those times getting covered in tree-sap prepared me for this a little.”

That conjured some images in Applejack’s head involving her little sister that the older farm-mare really wished her subconscious hadn’t generated …

“Ah ain’t really comfortable with y’all getting advice from that … that showmare, but she’s really bein’ straight ‘bout this? Can’t y’all jus’ … not bump yer uglies? Ah mean, ah remember bein’ your age an’ learnin’ what the crease ‘tween mah legs could be used for, but this jus’ seems …”

“Sis, imagine the fuzzy-head yah get during estrus an’ how you’ll do anythin’ if’n it means getting’ a cock inside you? Now imagine it bein’ twice as bad an’ yah got the smell o’ a cock hangin’ round, makin’ it even worse ‘cause yer sproutin’ an’ drippin’ all over the place …”

“Can’t rightly say ah’ve ever sprouted.”

“Ah’d smack yah sis, but we both know you’re stronger’n me on even your worst day.” Applebloom snorted, then dropped down to her belly on the couch and sighed like there was a Cutie Mark waiting for her if she did it hard enough. “It ain’t like we wanna be doggin’ each other’s kennels, but it jus’ … builds up ‘til none o’ us can keep our hooves off each other. Ah can’t explain it any clearer than that.”

Applejack sighed, crushed the sick feeling in her belly down and leaned back, considering her little sister’s words. They made sense after all, in a twisted fashion. With a spell designed to help repopulate an entire species cast on them and the aphrodisiacs from the Cake’s great cake-mistake flooding their system, it would be nearly impossible for young, inexperienced Mares to keep their hooves off each other.

“At least y’all didn’t wander into Snips and Snails.”

“Oh come on, they’re not that bad … but yeah, kind of glad we all ended up at the clubhouse together rather than wanderin’ into town.” Applebloom gave a short laugh, then her face scrunched up in thought. “Hey, Applejack? Do you know anything that can get, uhm, ‘water stains’ out of wooden floorboards?”

“Oh mah Faaaaaaaaaaaaaust…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna paced back and forth, chewing on a mouthful of her ever-flowing mane in thought as panic gripped her.

Her re … rela … relationship with Twilight was both a boon and a source of endless distress, for Twilight was a sweet and thoughtful mare who seemed happy to be with Luna, not Princess Luna, not the Immortal but the Mare … but Luna also knew that her sister, ever-plotting and planning centuries ahead at the least, ever seeking to bring peace and harmony to the world whether it wanted it or not, had plans for Twilight that certainly did not include seeing her beloved student entangled with her benighted sister!

And yet the thought of being separated from Twilight permanently made Luna sick to her core. Their ‘entanglement’ had been accidental, their continues efforts to understand the Sympathy muddled by their feelings and the mercurial nature of the ‘affliction’ and Fate itself seemed hell-bent on making sure their progress was slow and grinding, but it also begged a question Luna felt she dared not answer.

What if they did master the Sympathy? Once Luna’s estruss had run its course, would they still be willing to entangle with one another? Or would the rush of hormones and wild sex fade into an awkward distance between them?

Would Twilight still want to be Luna’s friend after they’d crossed such an important line and found it wasn’t for them? The thought of being alone again but for her sister, who was often absent due to her own royal duties, sent panic racing through the Lunar Princess’s veins and set her the tone of her pacing from nervous to frantic.

And now Celestia was, once again, completely bypassing Luna and altering the fate of the world. Changelings being allowed an amnesty period to turn themselves in and become officially recognized citizens of the nations. Queen Chrysalis surrendering herself and being subjected to ‘the trial of the century’, as the papers put it.

And despite the many ways that Celestia could have easily contacted Luna nearly immediately and asked for her input and advice … nothing but silence.

I cannot, will not, spend eternity as the younger sister meekly following in Celestia’s wake, not again! She promised that I would always be included in the fate of our nation after I returned from my exile, yet here we are once more…

Luna turned and paced back the way she’d come, eyes narrowing in anger and frustration.

But I simply cannot abandon Twilight to go home to Canterlot and give Celestia a piece of my mind, not now, especially not now. With Lady Rarity in such a fragile state, the proto-succubi is only barely trustworthy and cannot be trusted to leave Twilight unmolested and ensuring that Twilight herself is guarded at all hours of the day and night until her Ascension is complete, and our Sympathy is only barely understood and could flare up again at a most imappropraite time should we make a mistake … but if I take her back to Canterlot with me, how can I guarantee that the Changelings may not make a last-ditch attack against my Twilight, attempting to kill her or accidentally corrupting her?

Again Luna turned and paced, back and forth, her mind likewise chasing itself hither and thither. It was only when the sunlight began to dim, and Luna looked up in shock to see a wild storm that frequented the Everfree Forest beginning to block the sun that the Lunar Princess realized she’d been fretting to herself for several hours.

Perhaps … I should simply ask Twilight what she believes the right course of action is. And together, we might find a way forwards.

Chapter 61

CHAPTER 61

“Well, I hope your … conversations were less awkward than mine.” Rainbow said with obvious regret, her entire posture speaking of defeat.

“Ah jus’ learned mah lil’ sister’s gotten more action in a week than ah’ve gotten all year. Ah seriously doubt anythin’ that Twi’ could have said to yah can top that.” Applejack shot back as the foursome shuffled to the Cake’s bakery for some much needed comfort food.

“Well … uh … I think the Crusaders are taking this like champions.” Fluttershy said, then meep’d as she realized the way her comment could be taken, hiding her face behind her wings as Applejack shot her a dirty look.

“Hey, at least the girls are taking decent precautions. My parents used the rhythm method, and that worked out terribly.” Pinkie said, the sole ‘chipper’ individual of the group. “I can tell you right now, harmonicas and tambourines do nothing to stop teen pregnancy.”

Applejack swivelled her head to stare at Pinkie, narrow-eyed, for several seconds before speaking.

“Ah thought your parents got married to one another because of some sorta mystical stone?”

“Oh, it did, but they were really young when it happened, and where I grew up, school is very much an ‘optional’ sort of thing, especially amongst the more traditional ponies, and sex-ed was pretty much non-existent in the curriculum.”

“So how do musical instruments have anything to do with practicing safe sex?”

“Weeeeeeell … once they were able to read and write, their parents pulled them out of school to help on the rock-farms, and because everypony back home is super-serious and anti-fun, nobody ever talked about sex. So they thought the rhythm method was … you know … playing music during sex.”

“Pinkie, uhm, please don’t take this the wrong way, but that is the dumbest thing I’ve heard all day, and I had to listen to Scootaloo asking if Rainbow Dash would like her more now that she had some ‘experience’.” Fluttershy offered in the awkward silence as Rainbow and Applejack apparently lost the ability to speak for several moments, their faces contorting between expressions of shock, disbelief, amusement and horror.

“Scoota … wait, huh? But I … she’s just a … I don’t …”

“Uuuuuuuungh. Ah think this calls for an ol’ Apple Clan receipe: Getting’ hammered till we don’t care no more.” Applejack groaned loudly, turning around to poke the stammering blue pegasus that had fallen behind the group after Fluttershy’s unwitting bombshell. After several pokes that produced nothing but more bursts of frantic, terrified, confused mumbling from the Pegasus, the farm-mare simply shook her head, maneuvered a rigidly paralyzed Rainbow onto her back with some aid from the other two mares, and changed the foursome’s course back to the Apple’s farm for the ‘cure’ to their ills.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrysalis sucked noisily on her straw. Celestia sipped her tea. Discord grinned as the three strange Changeling ‘foals’ rampaged all over him, gnawing on his beard, tugging on his paw-pads, bouncing off his serpentine body. Candy Apple just sighed and kept on stitching the limbs back onto a teddy-bear that had come off second-best in a tug-of-war between the rambunctious children.

“I have already apologised for pushing too far with Captain Rosebush, if that’s what this visit is all about.” The Changeling Queen grumbled, eyeing her ‘drink’ with obvious distaste, the blend of simple pain-killers, what antibiotics that Bedside Manner had cautiously deemed ‘safe’ enough for an unknown species like a Changeling to ingest and liquefied love-energy obviously distasteful to her. “Or is this about your ill-conceived attempt to coax my sisters out of hiding?”

“Both, actually.” Celestia replied without a hint of irritation, levitating her cup down onto the small table and then using her magic again to levitate one of the black ‘fillies’ into her wings, the small black foal giggling as Celestia’s white feathers tickled her mercilessly. “I need to know if I am likely to be playing host to a few hundred Changelings, or tens of thousands of them. And while I am … miffed … at Rosebush’s antics, and your part in the whole mess, I already have a suitable replacement hard at work to cover for her, so consider my previous lecture punishment enough given your … unique situation.”

The Changeling Queen blinked, took another sip of her medicinal drink and gagged for a few moments before responding.

“I … do not believe any will come, at least not openly. Few Changelings can survive for longer than a few years without the Hive Mind to sustain them, and there is not a Changeling that draws breath that would expose their own Hive to outsiders, at least not willingly.” The battered Changeling leaned back into her cushy bed, eyes half-closed as she thought hard. “Only five of us survived the … trials that led us to escape from the Empress across the Badlands. Five sisters and a handful of children between us, Celestia and the Empress spawned hundreds of my Caste, the Queens, and we in turn spawned thousands of children. Even at the height of our numbers we were considered but a small fraction of her standing forces, and never were we considered part of her elite troops.”

“And that answers the Princess’s question how?” Candy Apple said tartly, arching a thick eyebrow at Chrysalis’s scowl, the eyebrow arching ever-higher as the Changeling Queen’s scowl continued to deepen.

“I was getting to that! Consider that most Changeling Hives, before our Exile, numbered at least in the thousands, and I was one of the few Queens who had more children than that. But after arriving in Equestria, the surviving Queens all agreed that smaller Hives would be less likely to be noticed by the native species of the region.” Chrysalis’s scowl turned into sombre expression as she regarded her offspring being tickled by the feathers of Celestia’s wings. “Our losses to the Elder Queens, and the roving marauders of the Badlands, have taught the Changelings hard lessons about exposing ourselves to outsiders. And sadly my first encounter with your ‘Nobles’ when I first attempted to make contact gave the impression you were a weak and useless leader, Celestia, given that your own kind seemed hellbent on taking your throne for themselves.”

“Yet you have exposed yourself and your Hive now.” Celestia murmured, raising an eyebrow as the little black filly in her wings rolled back and forth in the cocoon of the Solar Princess’s wings, utterly oblivious to the seriousness of the conversation.

“Because I am dying, and my Hive may yet share my fate. If my family is to die with me, then at least I can grant them the comfort of vengeance from beyond the grave, of knowing the Elder Queens and the Empress will march not on an unsuspecting mass of fodder, but a coalition of nations armed and ready for battle.” The Changeling spat, a vicious smile marring her face before a fit of coughing overcame her, and it took nearly a minute before she stopped, Candy Apple having to assist the Queen in sitting upright again after the fit passed. “Pupae, as far as I am aware, still lives amongst the Gryphons, her Hive taking on the appearance of wandering merchants, and by the time your message reaches the ironically-named ‘United’ States of Gryphonia, she will have weeks, if not longer, of flying to reach the border, and that is assuming her Hive isn’t ambushed by some petty tribal warlord or the Inquisitors of Asha’Ramahn on the way, meaning she will have missed her chance to take advantage of your generous offer.”

“Cocoon fled to Prance rather than remain on the same landmass as the Empress, but I felt the destruction of her Hive-Mind shortly after my invasion attempt. Without their Queen, the Hive is as good as dead … had I the strength to survive the trip, I would have gone there and tried to assimilate any survivors of her Hive into my own, but as damaged as I was after getting blasted halfway across the country and then embedded into the side of a mountain, forced to endure the sensations of thousands of my children dying in agony after your dear niece smeared them across most of the countryside, I thought my only hope of continuing the survival of my own Hive was to turn your dear student into a proxy Queen to hold the Hive-Mind together long enough for one of my children to mature and take over the role permanently.” Chrysalis harrumphed as Candy Apple put down her knitting to fuss over the crippled Queen long enough to get her into a more comfortable position, while Celestia and Discord kept the children entertained and oblivious to their mother’s distress. “Larvae’s Hive dwells somewhere on the edge of the Badlands, disguised as Ponies who make their living working the land, farmers or miners or … something. She’ll probably send at least one Changeling, likely an Infiltrator-Caste, to make contact and make sure this isn’t some sort of trap.”

“You said five sisters …” Discord urged as the white foal worked out some teething issues on his horns.

“Silk and her Hive chose to … to end the struggle on their own terms rather than continue on into an uncertain future. We, the Queens that is, do not speak of her out of contempt for their cowardice ...”

There was silence as a somber-faced Celestia digested that little bit of information, while Discord found himself trying to keep his head straight as all three changeling foals decided to attempt to gang-up on his stag-like antler, their combined weight causing him considerable pain, even with his chaotic nature compensating for the pressure they were causing on the horn’s socket.

“Prance … that will be a difficult nation to extract the Changelings from. The nation has suffered yet another coup d'état, and the populace is still bitterly split between Loyalists, Revolutionaries and the Anarchists.” Celestia said softly, gently disentangling the foals from Discord’s antler to cuddle them to her chest as she spoke. “There may still be Changelings who have endured the revolutions’ chaos, and we can take them back to Canterlot before the … what did you describe it as?”

“There isn’t an exact translation into your tongue, more like … your kind would refer to the symptoms as dementia, but it becomes more like the Changeling becomes trapped within a slowly dimishing set of tasks they will pursue with increasing obsession as the degeneration progresses. They are aware they can do other things, but without the Hive-Mind to support them and to hold the memories they require to function, they develop a compulsion to pursue a limited selection of actions until they eventually run out of love energy or something kills them while the Changeling tries to continue to function with only that limited selection of actions they can remember to perform.” The Changeling Queen said after a short pause to collect her thoughts. “The process can take years, but … you’re assuming that the Ponies of Prance would not immediately lynch any of their countrymen who were acting strange under the assumption they were rebels or spies? The entire country has been stuck in endless revolutions and coups for the past seven hundred years …”

“And if you could include these ‘orphaned’ Changelings in your Hive-Mind?” Discord prodded, teasing a foal out of Celestia’s telekinetic grip and calmly placing it back on his antler, the little black female gleefully gumming away at the velvet-covered horn.

“If the mental degeneration was not too severe, over time the Changelings we saved from Cocoon’s Hive would eventually recover and become coherent and self-sufficient members of my Hive, but if it their degeneration was too severe, the shock of being integrated into a different Hive-Mind would cause the Changeling’s mind to fragment and reduce their physical forms to being mindless vessels for the Hive-Mind again, but at least whatever fragments of consciousness remained would still live on within the Hive, and eventually be used by new Changelings as the foundations of their personalities.”

“I fail to see how becoming a mindless husk is a fate better than death …”

“Could you explain more about the infrastructure your Empress uses to …”

Discord and Celestia turned to give each other searching looks after talking over the top of one another, while Chrysalis just chuckled and took another slurp through her straw before gagging, her long, forked tongue protruding comically out the side of her mouth. Candy Apple stepped in to gather up the foals and place them back with their mother, the two female foals eagerly crawling under the blankets to suckle, while the white male instead snuggled up to his mother’s neck and settled for nomming on a mouthful of of the Changeling Queen’s green hair.

“To answer you, Discord, it would be preferable because some small part of the Changeling would live on and eventually become part of a new Changeling mind. And you, Princess Celestia, will not get one more piece of information out of me until this farce of a Trial is completed.” The Changeling Queen smirked as the two Immortals turned their glares on her, cuddling her white foal to her as if daring them to take the matter further with the innocent in harm’s way. “I will, as promised, give you all the information I have on the Elder Queens, the Empress and how the Empire functioned before my kind went into exile rather than be annihilated, but as of right now, that information is the only thing keeping my Hive and I in your good graces.”

“Even if the Trial fails and Equestria cannot be convinced to give your Hive a second …”

“Third!” Discord and Candy Apple said at the same time, the Chaos God turning to give the heavy-set mare a piece of his mind and then deciding to wisely keep his trap shut as he saw the expression smouldering on her face.

“… Another chance, I have no intention of throwing you back across the border to die. You will be given the best medical care we possess, regardless of outcome, and your Hive will be relocated in secret once your … your successor is capable of leading the Hive on their own.”

Chrysalis blinked, opened and closed her mouth silently several times then blinked again before speaking.

“You really would do that, wouldn’t you … very well, I’ll tell you everything I know about the Empress and the Elder Queens as a gesture of … ugh … good faith, as soon as I can get my hooves on the stores of royal jelly I left stashed in Canterlot.” Chrysalis grimaced at the words ‘good faith’, then harumphf’d when Celestia gave her a glowing smile of approval. “Speaking of which, any word on the royal jelly? Unless something has gone wrong with the retrieval?”

“There was some large-scale redevelopment in the area that made it difficult to locate the caverns without alerting the local land-owners to exactly what we were searching for, but my Agents have already started digging out some basements to get to the cave-system and our cover-story is perfectly reasonable. You’ll have your royal jelly in a few weeks, in the worst case scenario, and nopony in Canterlot will ever know they were living ontop of an abandoned Changeling nest.” Celestia’s smile grew into a grin as she looked at the little white foal nestled up against Chrysalis’s neck, nomming happily on his mother’s hair. “In time, I hope that such subterfuge will be unnecessary, but for now, we need to talk about something else, Chrysalis.”

“Oh boy, this will be good.” Smirking as well, Discord leaned in, eyes twinkling with mischief.

“Uhm … what?” The Changeling Queen looked from the Princess of the Sun to the Demigod of Chaos, then to Candy Apple, hoping for some sort of moral support and was only greeted with an implacable mask on the stocky mare’s face.

“I recently received a complaint from one of my head-maids about an inappropriate comment she received from one of your Changelings. Something about her ‘carpet’?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight looked at Luna.

Luna looked at Twilight.

Both turned to look at the three Crusaders who were beaming at them with flushed, nervous faces from the kitchen, and the frazzled looking Drake ferrying trays of burnt biscuits out of the kitchen, muttering under his breath.

“Perhaps we could talk … elsewhere? All the magical defences in the world will do little to stop ponies already inside the building from listening to us.” Luna asked softly, grimacing at the smells of burnt flour, hair and … other things greeted her as Spike shuffled back into his beloved kitchen to open the windows to let the lingering traces of smoke escape. The Crusaders were trying to be helpful and do nice things for Twilight while the trio stayed in the library, but there was helpful and then there was ‘helpful’.

Especially when they appeared to have let precious cookies burn because they had gotten ‘distracted’ again… Spike’s expression and posture spoke volumes about how the Crusader’s current ‘predicament’ was testing him, in a variety of ways.

Hopefully his hormones would not get the better of him in this situation. Luna wasn’t entirely sure she was prepared for dragon semen to be added to the mix … ugh, I did not need that mental image.

“Outside of this library, the spa is the most secure place in Ponyville right now, or at least the place with the most innate privacy once we layer a steam-room with enough wards to block scrying, but we’ll have to deal with Aloe and Lotus first. They … might not want us back after what happened in the sauna last time.”

“Perhaps. But they did promise they might be able to aid us with the … quirk … that could be behind Trixie’s resistance to the Succuponi Curse. The individuals they spoke of could also provide us some support with the Crusader’s new predelictions.” Luna pointed out, resting a wing on Twilight’s beck tentatively and hating herself for how nervous she felt about the act, and then relishing the relief that washed through her as Twilight leaned into Luna’s side and reciprocated the gesture. “As much as I, against my better judgement, have come to trust Trixie Lulamoon’s good intentions towards the Crusaders, a second opinion would be most welcome.”

“And a natural hermaphrodite could also help me speed up developing a counter-curse to the Succuponi infection as well as helping me understand how I’m going to reverse Weeaboo’s Spear Maiden spell … although I’m not looking forwards to the process of getting the, uh, reagents from these Ponies.”

“…Oh. So you’ll need their, uh, secretions?” Luna asked, looking at once bemused and disgusted as the two Alicorns retreated up the stairs to gather their thoughts, away from the barricade of awkward smiles of the Crusaders has put up to stop Twilight from entering her own, now thoroughily tainted, kitchen and seeing what dubious baked goods they were making.

Luna’s retreat to the Everfree Forest had recovered most of their supplies, stashed in her portable hole for ease of transport, but the seclusion had given the older alicorn some space and time to think about what she was going to do next, but still Luna felt trapped by the whole thing. The food and bedding would certainly see use, with four additional ponies present in the library for the foreseeable future, but still the Lunar Princess found herself hesitating to talk to Twilight about the Changelings, or their relationship.

Especially their relationship. Particularly the part about how Twilight might feel about Luna taking Celestia to task about side-lining her co-ruler with the Changeling issue.

… Perhaps later.

Perhaps much later.

“Well … yes. The spell Weeaboo developed to inflict the hermaphroditic state on the equine physiology changes specific parts of a pony’s body, but also the biology of the pony to pass those changes on to the next generation. If I can study the differences between a ‘freshly’ changed pony like the crusaders, and a ‘natural’ hermaphrodite, one who comes from a long lineage of similar individuals, I’ll be able to isolate the changes that Sweetie’s spell caused by comparing the data from a normal pony, a changed hermaphrodite and a ‘natural’ hermaphrodite.” Twilight explained, her posture slowly changing from ‘unstable alicorn on the edge of a full-blown panic attack’ back to ‘nerdy, adorkable mare’ that Luna had come to enjoy so much. “With the variables all documented, I’ll be able to triangulate the changes Weeaboo’s spell caused and hopefully be able to develop a counter-charm or –curse to reverse it’s effects without causing the crusaders any harm, and in the process maybe isolate how Trixie was able to resist the Succuponi Curse as well as she did.”

“I don’t think adding dongs to the mares of Equestria en mass will be a well-received ‘cure’ for demonic transformations, Twilight. I’m fairly certain that the majority of the Stallions, at least, will complain about being made superflurious.”

“Oh hush. Even if I can’t reverse the changes to the crusaders or cure Trixie immediately, understanding how Weeaboo’s Spear-Maiden Spell alters the physiology of not just the target, but their offspring as well, will be a giant leap in my understanding of bio-morphic magics, and that will help the situation in the long run.” The two alicorns spoke in whispers as they made their way out of the library and towards the town’s spa and health center, stoicly accepting the presence of the guards that seemingly materialized out of nowhere, both burly earth ponies and sleek bat-winged thestrals, to escort them. “His spell is … unique, as most forms of magic that alter the shape or physiology of a target are normally incapable of passing those changes on to the progeny of the target. Whole generations of scholars, mages and theorists haven’t been able to pinpoint what part of the spell or the energies it generates are capable of bypassing this natural ‘law’ of magic to allow the offspring to possess the same unnatural traits as the spell endows the parent with.”

Entering the spa proved somewhat problematic, as Luna’s thestrals and Celestia’s earth ponies had to have a knock-down, drag-out ‘my authority-peen exceeds yours’ argument over who would follow the Princesses inside before Luna and a stammering Twilight had to explain to the loyal Royal Guards that the Princesses were only going inside to speak to the owners about a private matter, and bodyguards were not needed inside the building … and especially not inside a sauna.

“We could stand guard outside the sauna’s door, your majesties.” One of the burly earth ponies offered, ignoring the seething look from his counterparts.

“Because somepony will ambush us inside a sauna.” Luna deadpanned, trying desperately not to smirk as the poor guard’s ears began to twitch in panic.

“It … it is a distinct possibility, your majesty.”

“Inside a place of business that is, due to the very nature of the services it provides, naturally designed to only have a few entrances and no large windows barring the entrance we now stand before? Making it rather difficult for anything to slip into the building without being noticed?” Luna continued, guiltily enjoying the guard’s not-squirming as she poked holes in his idea. “A building which will soon be subjected to a battery of protective wards and counter-scrying spells by both Princess Twilight, possibly one of the most gifted Mages in living memory as well as the Alicorn of Magic, and myself.”

The poor guard just meep’d softly and stared at the ground underneath Luna’s hooves.

“Your devotion to your duty is admirable, Guard Bulwark, but in this case you are taking things slightly too far. Half the Thestrals will take to the air and keep aerial surveilance while Twilight and I complete our business, while the other half will stand watch on the ground with two of your companions, while yourself and one member each of the Earth Guard and Night Guard will stay within the foyer of the health center in the unlikely event somepony or something is foolish enough to attack Ponyville now that we are on full alert.” Luna spread a wing to point to the Ponies along the street who had started to stop and stare, her gaze sweeping across the assembled guards. “And while we’re on the subject, you are not to bar anypony from entering the premises. We are here to discuss something with Aloe and Vera, not drive them out of business, am I understood?”

Apparently not trusting himself to speak, the despondant guard nodded briskly, trotting away to discuss who would be joining him inside the building as Twilight and Luna took the opportunity to duck inside as the first flashes of cameras began to make themselves known at the corners of the princesses’ eyes.

“Oh Faust! Princesses, vous êtes tôt, je veux dire, bienvenue! Uh, I mean, welcome to the Ponyville Day Spa, how can I help you?” Aloe stammered, flushing as she rushed around the counter to give a half-bow to both Princesses.

“Uh … are you and your sister free right now, Aloe?” Twilight asked, a little flustered herself by the other pony’s antics, the knowledge this pony had seen her muzzle-deep between Luna’s hind-legs, and the memory of the fantasy both Alicorns had witnesses on their foray into the Dreamscape that Aloe and Lotus shared. “We … we need to discuss the matter that was brought up on our last visit.”

“While my sœur and I normally do not allow … entanglements … on the premises, in your cases, we …”

“NO! No no no nono, not that!” Now blushing so hard that Luna was concerned that her lover might spontaneously combust on the spot, Twilight ducked her head and shot a nervous look at the doorway … and the army of reporters that had come running.

It appeared Bulwark and the Earth and Night Guard Ponies would be serving the noble and lofty duty of meat barricade at the doorway, given the way reporters seemed to be pouring out of every building, alleyway, cloud and tree and … dumpster?

“What Twilight is referring to is the ‘unique’ individuals we are seeking for a potential cure for the Succuponi Curse … and given that we may be recalled to Canterlot very shortly to deal with the Trial of Queen Chrysalis, we were hoping to speak to either you or your sister about methods of contact if we are absent when you next speak to these ponies.” Luna explained, closing the door softly with her telekinesis and then casting a sound-proofing spell-bubble around herself, Twilight and Aloe for good measure. Faust only knew the nightmare that would come calling if the scandal-hungry media thought Luna and Twilight were seeking a hermaphrodite, let alone the living hell the poor pony would be dropped into if their identity became public knowledge …

Aloe, still flushed, bit her bottom lip as she stared at Luna, then Twilight, and then the increasingly rowdy mob of reporters outside her business, trying to force their way past the Earth and Thestral Guard-Ponies.

“I will … escort you to a sauna, if that pleases your majesties? My sœur and I will need to talk, to arrange a meeting … forgive me, this is all so very sudden, we assumed we had a few more days at least!”

“I thought as much, but sadly time and Changelings wait for no-pony.” Luna offered with a shrug as the trio disappeared into the business-end of the health-center, a obviously nervous Aloe directing them into the spa-room and directing them to use the facilities as they saw fit while she sought out her sister to discuss …

Twilight suggested she will need the … seed … of the hermaphrodite to help her develop a counter-curse for Weeaboo’s Spear-Maiden Spell. Luna found herself thinking as she and Twilight set about filling one of the smaller spas with fresh water, and then loading the hot water with hoof-fuls of herbal bath-bombs as the jets began to agitate the water. I am not entirely certain I like the sound of that. Neither of us is entirely in the right frame of mind, with my estrus affecting us both thanks to the Sympathy’s rebound effect, and I most certainly do not like the idea of Twilight ‘gathering’ said seed from this mysterious pony with her own hoof under these circumstances!

But was it jealousy that Twilight, new to the pleasures of the flesh, might stray from Luna’s side to sate the urges estrus gave to all Mares or was it purely concern for a friend, one of the few honest friends Luna could claim she had, putting herself in harm’s way while in a vulnerable state?

And that is the rub, isn’t it? What if Twilight does not wish to follow Celestia’s will in the coming trial of Queen Chrysalis? There is certainly ill-will between Twilight and the Changeling, especially considering their encounters have always ended in battle and the Changeling’s defeat, but what if Twilight … works against Celestia? The Lunar Monarch bit her bottom lip in thought as the two Alicorns gingerly worked their way into the hot waters of the spa, their tails and manes spreading out into the scented, agitated water like pools of coloured oil. Twilight is veryupset that my sister saw fit to risk the lives of the other Element Bearers, learning that Celestia has been editing history and effectively ‘lying’ to the entire world in the process.

What if Twilight chooses this crucial, vulnerable point in time to rebel against her mentor? And who should I stand with, the sister who says things will change for us, but still makes decisions as if she was the sole leading voice of Equestria, or her student, whom I am entangled with and, dare I say it, falling in love with as we stumble along in the throes of an unnatural estrus fogging our minds?

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Some would say that Shining Armor and Princess Cadence were eager to leave the train and visit their friends and family in Ponyville. Those would be the polite ones.

Others, more jaded, might have pointed out how the two visiting members of state had acted like they had more in common with battering-rams than Ponies as they barrelled through the small knot of reporters that had come spilling out of the carriages to ambush them, or come running from the town itself.

Shining Armor had simply wrapped himself in layers of reactive barrier-spells and just rushed out the door, the unfortunates stupid enough to be standing right by the door smushing against the cold static of the barrier-spell before being sent flying like ping-pong balls and then, to add insult to injury, stepped on as the panicking Royal Consort proceeded to run in a straight line towards the Ponyville Library.

Princess Cadence, on the other hoof, came blasting out of the door at the other end of the royal carriage like a pink cyclone of feathers and hooves and squee, a demented smile on her face as she quickly caught up to her husband and causing no less chaos in the air-traffic of Ponyville as her husband’s armored charge through the streets was doing to the ponies confined to the ground.

A few moments later, a pair of pale-faced Crystal Guards peered out from the exit of the train-station, with the terrified cries of the Ponies in Ponyville itself blending with the stunned groans of the flattened reporters behind them, then gave each other a nervous look.

“Like I keep saying, those two don’t need protecting, Adamant, it’s the poor bastards around them that need that courtesy.” Flash Sentry grumbled, nursing a sore wing where Shining Armor had flattened him on the way out of the carriage.

“But, but our duties …” The poor diamond-coated Crystal Pony mumbled unhappily, staring at the chaos with an expression the Pegasus could only call ‘betrayed loyal puppy mode’.

“Look, let’s just … make sure nopony is injured, and then we’ll go stand guard outside the Golden Oaks Library while our two gloriously insane leaders roast the captain’s sister until the Purple Princess of Prudery gives up the name of her … lover.” The orange Pegasus spat the last word as if it were poison, a sour expression settling onto his muzzle. “Just think about it this way: At least you won’t be the one the whole country will blame for turning the latest Princess to grace the thrones gay after just one date.”

Chapter 62

CHAPTER 62

“I take it we’re not going to Ponyville?” Discord hissed nervously from inside Celestia’s pitcher of pineapple juice, the Aspect of Chaos having shrunk himself down to a size small enough to stand ontop of a floating chunk of fruit to witness the ‘insanity and inanity’ of Day Court from the ‘best seats in the house’.

“Most certainly not. I think poor Twilight and Luna will have enough to deal with with the demented duo harassing them, and having me hovering around will only make Cadence and Shining more determined to force Twilight to support their personal agenda against Queen Chrysalis.” Celestia whispered back as she levitated the pitcher to a glass held close to her chest, pouring herself a serving of chilled, blended fruit juices as the knot of Nobles before her squabbled and bickered over a motion to bar Twilight from being considered a ‘true’ Princess, several insisting that the Diarchy was enough social upheaval for one lifetime, while others instead pointed out a Triarchy would offer Celestia and Luna much-needed time to tend to affairs of state that had been sidelined by their cycling times on the thrones while Twilight could be coached into being a more modern-minded ruler … and the third and noticeably larger group of nobles very loudly pointed out that most nations of the modern world had long since moved on from their barbaric pasts, and perhaps Equestria should do likewise by discarding all forms of immortal leadership and embrace a mortal monarch … from the ranks of Canterlot’s own elite, of course.

“And you’re assuming that they won’t succeed?” Discord asked in his helium-pitched voice as Celestia mimed holding the pitcher close to her for a second top-up, the Solar Princess’s features flat and stern as she struggled to not scowl at the self-important fools bickering in-front of her and wasting her precious time.

“I believe that Cadence, however irrational, will do nothing to put her beloved sister-in-law’s Ascension at risk. And I know Shining Armor would sooner plunge head-first into the pits of Tartarus itself than risk hurting Twilight, even in that hilariously adorable panicked-big-brother-mode of his.” Celestia whispered back, raising an eyebrow as the verbal barbs being hurled around the room before her turned from merely stinging to venomous as Lord Buttercup of the Amber Swirl House shouted at his long-time rival, Lord Almond of the Golden Hooves.

“I bet you just want yet another princess’s skirts to hide behind like the snivelling little foal you are, but perhaps you can feed this one enough cake to her arse to swell up enough to obscure that yellow strip you inherited from your father’s best friend!”

And then it was on.

Before Princess Celestia could call for order, or the Royal Guards knew it was happening, Lord Almond flew across the room so fast that for several seconds Celestia was left flat-hooved that such an old, rotund Pony could conjure a flight spell that quickly, the two bitter old rivals flailing away at each other with their hooves like a pair of school-foals, and by the time Celestia had gotten over her surprise, the entire parliament was engaged in fisticuffs or, in the case of more cunning Lords in attendance, or perhaps just those completely lost to their fury, tearing up furniture that had been bolted to the floor to try and avoid precisely this kind of situation to use the expensive chairs and benches as either bludgeons or barricades as the pinnacle of Canterlot’s elite set to work on each other like drunken sailors brawling over the last barrel of grog.

“I thought you said Day-Court was supposed to be boring!” Discord chortled, then yelped as a stray piece of furniture flew past Celestia’s head and smashed the pitcher from her telekinetic grasp. Horn blazing with magic as she stood up from her throne, face set into a mask of anger as the Solar Princess prepared her magic for an assault of her own.

Thankfully the additional pieces of her Regalia helped magnify Celestia’s control of her power, meaning that the brawling Lords and Ladies of Canterlot were merely squished slightly as Celestia’s telekinetic magic surrounded and contained them all individually, rather than being smushed against the nearest hard surface and risking broken bones or bruised organs.

Still need to get used to the fact I have this much control now, there are so many more options available to me now that my power can be fine tuned to this extent. Celestia thought to herself with a mixed cocktail of concern and thrill surging through her as she lifted the Parliament of Equestria by the literal scruffs of their necks and turned them all to face her, the entitled gits glaring at each other and spluttering curses until they caught sight of Celestia’s expression, the whole room going silent in a matter of moments but for the slight patter of water on carpet as several members of parliament wet themselves.

“What in Tartarus is wrong with the lot of you?” Celestia grated loud enough that the closest members of parliament swayed backwards from the force of her words, and ponies in the halls outside of the parliament proper probably heard her, scowling at the Lords and Ladies as they withered or flinched at her gaze and the few Royal Guards in the room could barely repress their snickering. “You are supposed to be the elite, the pinnacle of refinement and gentlemane conduct, the beacon to which all of Equestria is supposed to look towards when things become troubled, but all I have seen and heard today is a pack of spoiled, inbred fools hurling insults and trying to score points instead of doing their jobs.”

The bulk of the dangling nobles began protesting their innocence, before Celestia shook them all in the inescapable grip of her magic until they went quiet again.

“We have the United States of Gryphonia threatening open warfare on our borders, a literal Fiend managed to sneak back into our world without tripping a single one of the many mystical counter-measures we and scores of other nations have spent millions of bits to have in place to avoid just such an incident, and need I remind anypony that we have the Changeling Queen offering complete surrender to Equestria because of an even greater threat that is waiting for us across the Badlands?” The Solar Princess raged, ignoring the squeaks of alarm and gasps that filled the room as flickers of yellow and orange light flashed through her mane and tail like streaks of fire. “Let alone the countless other threats and challenges that face our country, and our people? So for once, now if at no other time, bury your petty vendettas, put aside your personal agendas and show that you are, indeed, Noble!”

“I am cancelling Day-Court’s parliament session for the day, since it is painfully obvious none of you have your minds on your jobs today, but when we reconvene tomorrow, you will all act with the dignity, respect and gravity the title ‘noble’ implies, or so help me, I will invoke my Right of Crown, dismiss you all from Parliament and find those beings, pony or otherwise, who truly have the best interests of this nation in their hearts!” Celestia promised with a tone of grim finality, placing every member of parliament firmly on their hooves before releasing her telekinetic grip, the doors to the parliament hall swinging open as more of her magic pushed them open, a clear gesture that Celestia intended the Lords and Ladies to obey her and leave.

“But Princess Celestia, we still have the debate about the future of our government …” Lord Buttercup spluttered, one of the last of the Parliament to left in the room as the bulk of the Ponies fled, either in embarrassment or fear, from Princess Celestia.

“Contrary to what you might wish for, Lord Buttercup, none of the Alicorns are going to go away simply because our mere existence offends your sense of social order. We are Immortal, and unlike yourself, Alicorns wish the best for all life on this world, not just ponies, and especially not just Unicorns.” The Solar Princess focused the full wrath of her gaze on the aging Unicorn, who visibly quivered under her glare, his eyes going wide and his ears flattening against his head in a clear fear-response to her fury. “Our kingdom has always been a Diarchy, even when one of its Princesses was afflicted by a Nightmare Spirit. With the Ascension of Cadence, it became a Triarchy until the time Cadence became Princess of the Crystal Kingdom. With Twilight’s Ascension, it has become a Triarchy once again!”

And with that, the remaining members of Parliament fled from the hall without a care for their dignity, nearly bowling over the Royal Guards in the process.

“Well … that’s put the wind up them!” Discord sighed, squeezing out of the now-flattened pitcher and rapidly growing in size till he stood at his full height again, twisting his body around like a towel, in a way that set several Royal Guards to turning green or wincing at the cracking and popping noises the Chaos God’s body made during his futile attempt to wring the fruit-juice out of his fur and feathers. “Remind me again why you bother with this farce, Celestia? Seems to me your little ponies would be much better off if you just threw the lot of these nobles out on their well-padded flanks and ruling the old fashioned way. A few months without the Parliament’s lackeys filling the papers and radio-waves with their particular brand of poison, and most of your troubles should clear right up …right?”

“I try to be a beneficent ruler, Discord, because someday I hope to step down as Princess and allow Ponykind to rule on their own, with their own leaders, without needing to be shepherded every step along the road to true civilisation.” Celestia sagged on her throne, feeling the weight of her millenias more than ever as the echoes of the brawl, her shouting and the terrified nobles fleeing down her castle’s marble corridors slowly began to fade. “Instead, I find myself trapped by ancient promises and social customs that refuse to fade no matter how toxic and poisonous they have become over time, and any move I make to remove their influence is decried as tyranny or despotic.”

“Any attempt I make to leave the future of Equestria in the hooves of the current batch of would-be leaders would be doomed to failure the instant I was legally unable to step back in, the members of parliment would tear the country, and the people, apart to pursue their agendas once they were certain I could no longer legally stop them.” The words flowed from her, yet Celestia found herself powerless to stop. It had been so long since somebody had asked why the Solar Princess put up with so much from the ‘elite’ of Canterlot after all. “Yet every time I have tried to install a leader who can live up the ideals Ponykind needs to embrace if it is to survive my absence, the screeching from those self-same individuals riles up the entire country and forces me to abandon the plan to soothe everypony and remind them that I am the one who is trying to look after their interests, not these vain, self-centered idiots whose ambitions extend no further than their bank-accounts or egoes!”

“Have you ever thought about giving your plans a test-run?” Discord offered, walking forwards to pat Celestia on the shoulder as the Royal Guards set about ‘securing’ the room, which basically amounted to putting the broken furniture off to the side so they could take up their normal positions about the chamber. “Tell them they’re on their own, leave somepony you trust to not immediately set the world on fire in charge and just ... just wait in the wings for a few months and see how they do?”

“I have, but I also have to make sure that if the worst does happen, I can smoothly step back in without causing a legal nightmare … or start a civil war.”

“Have you considered you don’t have to do that? Think about it rationally, Cellie.” The Chaos God summoned a floating rainbow-hued pillow and plonked himself on it in-front of Celestia’s throne, putting his chin in his lion-paw and giving the Solar Princess a long, searching look. “Every time Ponykind teeters on the verge of some great calamity, you swoop in, save the day, preach at them about harmony and tolerance … and then the cycle repeats. Ponies never learn their lesson because you, for good reasons I will freely admit, always step in and take the brunt of the pain on their behalf.”

“But I am their Immortal, Discord …”

“No, you are not. Luna is, Cadence is, Twilight will be, but you are an Immortal of a much older race than ponykind, however related the two species might be. For all the effort you put into keeping ponykind from slipping back into barbarism, you are ultimately not their sole shining light, nor should you be breaking your own back trying to carry this burden alone.” Discord pointed out, laying his eagle-claw on Celestia’s shoulder as the Solar Monarch went pale-faced and tight-lipped. "Think of Equestria like a foal that keeps reaching for a candle-flame because it is entraced by the dancing light. Sooner or later, no matter how much the mother hovers over the child, she will have to leave it alone, and the foal will burn it’s hoof or nose and learn the very important lesson that all that is beautiful is not necessarily friendly.”

“And so you believe I should allow Equestria to crumble, to burn, to teach my little ponies a lesson, to make them less reliant upon myself?” Celestia’s voice was small and brittle, and Discord winced at the way she tried to withdraw from his touch.

“Definitely not anything so dire! Certainly, we hold the line while the current threats loom overhead, and while both Luna and Twilight are learning how to be Princesses, but perhaps ponykind is due for a lesson on not just how they fit into the grand scheme of things, but how lucky they have been to have you guiding and protecting them for all these millennia.” Hoping to explain himself better, Discord leaned in and gave what he hoped was a sympathetic look. “Then, when they understand just how much they have been protected and sheltered by you, you can have Luna and Twilight guide them back onto the right path and then, finally you can … well … what do you want to do?”

Celestia blinked at Discord, paused for a long, awkward moment and stared around the wrecked parliament hall, her eyes wandering over stained glass windows depicting ancient heroes protecting the weak and defenceless and the ruins of expensive furniture and whole trees worth of documents ruined in the brawl, before saying in a very quiet voice.

“After all these millennia, I don’t even know what I truly want anymore.” Celestia whispered softly enough that Discord almost believed he’d imagined it. “It has been so long since I did something purely because I, Celestia, wanted to do it, rather than the world needed from Princess Celestia.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, Shining, always happy to see you, BBBFF, but uh … a little warning that Cadence had gone insane might have been helpful right now.” Spike hissed as Cadence, for lack of a better term, violated the upstairs portion of the Golden Oaks Library, while Spike ‘entertained’ his oldest sibling in the relative sanctuary of the kitchen and the Crusaders went into hiding around the library proper.

Separate hiding places. Spike may have liked cleaning, but there were limits to his patience, and his fetishes had taken enough of a pounding, and not the good kind either, over the past few days. At least Trixie, despite all of her … eccentricities, has the experience and control to keep the Crusaders in line and not ruining his life twenty-four-seven. Though Faust only knew what Shining Armor would make of Trixie living with Twilight ….

Scratch that, having Shining Armor and Cadence find out that four oversexed hermaphrodites were living under the same roof as Twilight and Luna, and that Luna was Twilight’s maybe-kinda-sorta-very-much-yes-but-we’re-shy girlfriend, would pretty much guarantee that Spike would have a miniature apocalypse on his claws. If Shining Armor didn’t immediately flatten every non-Sparkle within a fifty-meter radius around his sister and then try to hustle Twilight off to the Crystal Empire ‘for her own protection’ upon hearing there was a penis belonging to a non-family member sleeping under the same roof as Twilight, Spike would eat the hat Rarity had given him last hearthwarming.

Faust alone knew what Cadence would do …

“To be honest, Spike, given everything else that has happened, I’m just grateful I was able to convince Cadence to take the train to Ponyville and not fly here under her own power. With the suddenness of the Changelings surrendering and the months of stress of trying to convince an entire nation of traumatized, time-lost, ex-slave crystal ponies that seeking psychiatric help for the nightmares and phobias their previous king is responsible for is actually going to benefit them in the long-term, my wife and I have kind of been barely able to get a moment to ourselves, let alone keep up correspondence with our friends and family.”

“Uh, wow … I knew things were kinda harsh in the Empire, but that sounds … didn’t Mom send you any support?”

“Do you mean Twilight Velvet or the Princess?” Shining asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Mom as in Princess Celestia. I don’t think anything Velvet would send would be useful unless you wanted the Crystal Ponies to start breeding up their numbers … or scare them off sex for life.”

Shining gave a short snort of laughter and gave Spike an appraising look before speaking next. “Well, to be fair, Celestia sent nearly a hundred psychiatrists and a good five hundred Royal Guards, physicians and trade-ponies to help bring the Crystal Empire up to speed, but when you consider we have over fifty thousand crystal ponies who are all traumatized to the point that even the hint of black smoke in the air can send them screaming in terror … we’re lucky the Empire has held out for as long as it has.”

“But you left in a great screaming hurry to come deal with Queen Bug-Britches?” Spike asked in a light tone, but Shining’s face screwed up into a scowl all the same.

“She’s a threat to the world, Spike. She overpowered Celestia …”

“Only because Mom wasn’t wearing all of her Regalia and didn’t want to flash-fry a few hundred Ponies by accident.” The Drake pointed out before deciding that discretion was the better part of valor when Shining’s scowl twisted even further.

“… Overpowered Celestia and then proceeded to hold the entirety of Canterlot hostage, and showed amazing tactical fore-sight in putting over a hundred changelings in the room that directly connected to the vaults where the Elements were stored … after making the Bearers fight another hundred Changelings in a running brawl before that.” The white-coated Royal Consort finished, glaring down at the young Drake before sighing and shaking his head. “And Celestia let her back into the capital. What were you expecting, Cadence and I to just shrug and mind our own business? You know who, and what, Celestia is, do you really think we’re going to just let a being who has shown herself to be tactically and socially savvy enough to blind-side the entirety of Canterlot Command to get within range of the Princesses again, especially given her agenda seems to be enslaving ponykind as a source of food?”

“But enlisting my sister to help kick-start Celestia’s common sense is secondary to the reason I am here today.” Shining said, lowering his head until his muzzle almost touched Spike’s snout. “You can probably guess by the way Cadence and I are acting the real reason why we’re here.”

“Cadence is pregnant?”

“…”

“Flash Sentry is about to propose to Twilight?”

“…”

“Celestia is pregnant?”

“…”

“… You know that I can’t tell you who it is, right?”

“You know I will tell Twilight where you hide your porn if you don’t tell me who this ‘marefriend’ of hers is, right?”

“Oh please.” Spike scoffed and waved a talon dismissively at Shining Armor. “Twilight already busted my stash a couple of months ago. That threat holds nothing against the candle that is Twilight’s ‘pervy things are bad’ lecture.”

“How about for a crate’s worth of prime-grade Crystal Empire diamonds, emerald-cut and completely free of inclusions?”

“Shining, the last time you tried that offer, I got a ‘crate’ that was barely bigger than a shoe-box, nearly full of packing peanuts and only held about six of those diamonds … and Twilight claimed half of them for her transmutation experiments.”

“What if I said, this time, that it would be a crate the size of a draft-horse, full of your body-weight in stones?”

Spike paused for a moment to consider the offer. There was just … something about gems from the Crystal Empire that made them so damn tasty that even the finest grade of gems from Equestria's mines paled in comparison, but the protective measures Princess Celestia and Princess Cadence had put in place to protect the Empire from overzealous merchants or hungry dragons had driven the cost of gems from that part of the world through the roof …

Even if he saved up six months of his allowance, Spike would be lucky to be able to buy a handful of rubies or sapphires from the Crystal Empire’s mines, let alone the mind-numbingly delicious Crystal Empire diamonds. And here was Shining Armor, promising Spike’s own body-weight in those gems, of the highest possible grade, cut just the way he liked them.

And all he’d have to do was say one name …

“Not even for that, Shining. Twilight’s trust is too important to me.” Wiping a trickle of drool away from the corner of his mouth, Spike stepped away from Shining Armor, fighting down the surge of resentment that, once again, he was having to put up with this kind of mess because of his pony ‘family’. “And as her older brother, you should trust that Twilight can handle a relationship, especially with her friends supporting her.”

“But she’s naive! You know that! This could just be a ploy to turn her against the Kingdom, or to corrupt the elements, or even~!” Shining’s frustrated rant was cut short as a pink feather wafted into the room, followed by an increasing sense of pressure that drew both males’ eyes to the entrance to the kitchen, where a vigorously ruffled Princess Cadence stood, chest heaving, horn glowing with telekinetic power and her face set into a terrifying mask of excitement, with a horrified-looking Trixie floating in the air, wrapped in the Princess’s pink magic.

“Squeeeeeeeee…”

“Trixie is absolutely certain the terms of her parole do not include this! Spike, please fetch Mistress Twilight before the Pink Devil here does something that Trixie will regret!”

Shining’s mouth flopped open in shock, his head whipping from Cadence and Trixie and back to Spike so rapidly the young Drake hoped the bones in the stallion’s neck wouldn’t disintegrate under the stress, before Royal Consort Shining Armor, one of the bravest and most decorated officers in the Royal Guard, Husband to the Princess of Love and national hero in his own right, fainted dead away in his chair.

“… I am not paid nearly enough for this.” Spike muttered darkly as Cadence’s hooves found themselves on each side of his face and began squeezing his cheeks, while the pink-coated demon before him began to squee ever louder.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, you two are a thing now, huh?” Rainbow Dash asked, eyeing Applejack and Fluttershy as the two flushed and shifted awkwardly on the blanket the farm-mare had put over the hay to keep the sharp edges from poking them in uncomfortable places.

Extremely raw and overly sensitive places at that. Rainbow was fairly certain she’d take a few days at the least to recover from her plowing lessons with Big Mac, and judging from how Fluttershy kept on edging closer to Applejack and then scooting away …

“That’s a big hell naw, an’ y’all are dumber than a post for even thinkin’ that, Dash. ‘Parently ah was so crazed from the drugs in the cake ah had mah way with poor Fluttershy an’ Zecora. Still tryin’ to figure out how ah’m gonna make it right.” The farm-mare sighed and pulled her much-abused Stetson down over her face, while Fluttershy squeaked, turned almost as pink as Pinkie and hid behind her wings.

“But you left me to get my … launching pad get completely renovated by Big Mac’s Little Mac?”

“Girl, there’s some things yah just don’t talk ‘bout in front o’ an Apple, an’ mah brother’s tool is one o’ those things!”

“Oh come on, you know that thing is impressive. And can I just say … boy’s got the skills to pay the bills.”

“Uhm … how … skilled?” Fluttershy stammered, steam blowing through her feathers, while Applejack just spluttered and buried her muzzle in her tankard of cider.

“Okay, you know how I have got a stable of partners? Well, keep that in mind and then consider I’d throw them all out on their asses if Big Mac agreed to go steady with me.” Rainbow gushed, guiltily enjoying the way Applejack’s eyes looked like they were ready to burn holes in the blue dare-devil flyer. “He hits every spot you can think of just right, he didn’t just ravage me like a Stallion does when they’re over the edge, even when we both had those damn drugs running through our systems. He’s so careful, but so thorough. I gave up counting my orgasms after the seventh one …”

“Dash, ah will kick your plot through that wall if’n y’all don’t find something else to discuss …”

“Uhm, maybe Rainbow could talk to me quietly … over there? And you can try to wake Pinkie up?” Fluttershy said in a, for her at least, unusually loud and firm tone, eyeballing Applejack as the butter-coloured mare shuffled over to Rainbow’s side and leaned in close. “I need to have a talk with Rainbow Dash, in private, so if you could ...”

Nodding mutely, and looking more than a little pale considering just a few moments before Applejack looked like she was about to spontaneously combust on the spot, the farm-mare edged away from the two pegasus and prepared herself to try and wake Pinkie up. The party-mare had made the mistake of believing that ‘hard’ cider wouldn’t be that difficult for her to handle, much like how Pinkie could easily polish off an entire keg of normal cider on her own. Instead, now she lay half-buried in hay after just a few tankards, giggling and mumbling in her sleep.

The girls had learned the hard way that Pinkie was a snuggle-fiend when drunk and asleep and, as several bruises around Rainbow and Applejack's necks could attest, loathe to give up her victims.

“Uh, you mean how long he lasts, or are we talking about …”

“I want length, width, size of the flare, how long he takes to reach orgasm and what his favourite positions are.” Rainbow flinched as she found herself on the receiving end of a full-powered Stare, the other pegasus somehow pulling out a pen and pad of note-paper out of her mane. “Also what is the volume of the semen he produces, and how many times he can come before the volume began to diminish.”

“Flutters … I’m really not that comfortable about erk!” Rainbow stuttered, before the end of the pen poked her in the nose, and Fluttershy leaned in uncomfortably close, close enough that Rainbow got a whiff of something both familiar and musky coming off the other mare.

Oh dear sweet filly-fooling Faust!

“You either think really hard about it, or we go back to my place and I get out my measuring equipment and we work our way up the list until you can tell me which one is closest in dimensions to Little Mac.” Fluttershy hissed, her Stare only increasing in power as Rainbow Dash felt her will to resist fading away like a sandcastle on the shore-line as the tide came in. “And Applejack will tell you I have more than enough tools to help you accurately remember everything you can about Little Mac if your memory starts to fade.”

Rainbow Dash’s reply was a muffled, terrified squeak.

“That’s better. Now, start at the beginning, and don’t skip anything.” Fluttershy said, settling herself right by Rainbow Dash’s side, her wings moving to hold the pen and notepad more naturally as Fluttershy turned her Stare down … slightly.

Chapter 63

Chapter 63

Twilight and Luna shared a concerned look before turning their attention back to the aptly-named ‘Spa Twins’, whom had spent an unusually long amount of time fussing over the oils they would be using for the massage and bickering in their native tongue after settling the two Alicorns on the massage-beds.

“Do you think they’re unsettled at how much business we’re costing them, or about what happens if they get revealed as the middle-ponies in setting up our meeting these ‘natural’ hermaphrodites?” Twilight whispered to Luna as the two Alicorns shifted softly on the padded ‘beds’.

“Perhaps. Or perhaps they are simply nervous about having two members of Royalty under their roof … and a howling pack of deranged reporters engaged in a battle to the death with the Royal Guard at their front door.”

“Speaking of which, shouldn’t we go … save them or something? Those reporters were demented.”

“While my heart says yes … we must not. The Royal Guard need to prove they earn their bits. And to be brutally honest, maybe standing shoulder to shoulder in a little scrap-fest will convince my Night Guard and the Royal Guard that they are indeed comrades, not rivals squabbling over the attention of my sister and I.” Luna sighed and extended a wing to pat Twilight between the shoulder-blades. “And besides, right now making sure that your Ascension does not go awry is more important than anything. And considering what we saw involving these sisters in the Dreamscape …”

Twilight turned slightly green and gave Luna a scathing look, to which the elder Alicorn merely giggled.

“You just had to bring that up, didn’t you? I’d almost repressed it entirely, and now I have to look them in the eye and try to not remember … oh Faust.”

“Your majesties?” Twilight and Luna turned to look at the twin sisters, Twilight quickly flushing as she caught the eyes of Aloe and quickly looked down. Luna raised an eyebrow as the pink-coated, blue-maned spa-pony all but melted at the fleeting contact, but decided to focus on the other twin, the pink-coated, blue-maned Lotus, rather than travel down that road right at the start of their meeting. The last thing I need is to let the green-eyed demon start whispering in my ear, now of all times!

“Yes, Lotus, please, have you and your sister come to a decision?” Luna asked in what she hoped was a pleasant tone, but jealousy pressed at the back of her mind, demanding she assert herself, remind these twins of the social gap between Princesses and Commoners to keep them away from her Twilight. First Trixie and Sunset Shimmer, now Aloe? And how many dreams have I seen where my Ponies lust after Twilight? MY Twilight! And yet, I cannot fault them for the way Twilight unknowingly tugs at the heart-strings of the ponies around her …

“We were wondering if you needed to meet the … ponies you sought right now, or sometime later, after the bâtards outside have calmed down.” Lotus asked softly, glancing from her sister to Twilight, who still found the mattress under her to be absolutely fascinating, and sighed heavily. “My sœur and I have discussed the matter at length, and while we are happy to aid you, we dare not expose ourselves or the … ponies you seek to the Equestrian reporters. Our names, and those we associate with, would be ruined should word get out about Déesse Twilight’s request, and our part in it.”

“Understandable, and I applaud your caution. Unfortunately, it seems that this trial of the Changeling Queen could take weeks at the least, or months if we are truly unlucky.” The Lunar Princess explained, prodding Twilight with a wing-tip to encourage her lover to speak up. “However, only Twilight Sparkle knows what she will need, and how long, to restore the Cutiemark Crusaders back to their original state. So … Twilight?”

“Oh, uhm, right. Well, the less I know about who, the less chance of me accidentally letting slip if I get flustered, so all I will ask for now is if the hermaphrodites live in Ponyville, and thus are likely to still be here when we return from Canterlot?” Twilight asked, steadfasting refusing to look anypony in the eye. “And are these ponies willing to, ah, have samples taken? For the purpose of helping the Crusaders return to normal?”

“About that, your highness. The ponies you seek have one request in return for aiding you in this task.” Lotus coughed and gave her pink-coated sister a scorching look when Aloe opened her mouth to speak. “That is to say they desire the, ah, sampling be far less clinical and more … long term.”

Luna’s ears flattened against her skull, the demon of jealousy thrown off its perch on her shoulder as the behemoth called anger roused itself inside her mind. The phrasing that Lotus used triggered alarm-bells in the back of Luna’s consciousness, but her emotions, and the stress of the past few days hindered her attempts to force her mind back to a calm and rational state. They are just the middle-ponies, the middle-ponies, they are not going to mount Twilight right in-front of you the first time Twilight lowers her guard. You already know what happens when you obsess over something like this and cannot control your negative emotions, Luna! One infestation of Nightmare Spirits was quite enough!

“Th-they want me to, uhm, milk them repeatedly?” Twilight squeaked in alarm, her eyes growing almost comically wide and her pupils shrinking to little more than pinpricks, and Luna couldn’t stop herself scowling at the Spa-Ponies, her frustration deepening as she realized both of their gazes rested solely on Twilight. Worshipful gazes at that, especially from the pink twin. Could their dream-scape have been more than just a whimsical fantasy brought upon by the conversation Twilight had with them? Or could it possibly have been a glimpse into … but surely, given their employment, somepony would have noticed if the twins were hermaphrodites? They are earth ponies, they cannot possibly cast a spell to obscure their genders!

“Non non non, I meant to say the ponies does not wish to just lay with you, ma belle Déesse.” The pink spa-pony spluttered, leaning forwards to stroke Twilight’s mane, the calming gesture having only minimal effect on the wide-eyed and now-thoroughly panicked Alicorn. “I mean to say that they wish to make love to you, and to be yours for the rest of your life.”

Twilight blinked. Sloooooooowly. She turned her head to look at Luna, blinked again, then turned back to the two Spa-Twins, who were gazing at her with soft, welcoming smiles, the same expressions they wore every time she came in for a ‘pampering’ session with Rarity and Fluttershy, expressions that suddenly seemed far more inappropriate and embarrassing than Twilight could handle.

“But … but I already have a ma … a ma-mar … marefriend.” Spitting a word out had never been so hard to Twilight, but seeing Luna’s face made it worth-while … until Aloe and Lotus shared a look of their own and said together.

“I am certain that sharing your affections will not be an issue.”

“Twilight, PREPARE THINE ANUS!” echoed through Twilight’s mind, and without thinking, Twilight ducked her head down, flattening herself onto the massage table as much as she could … and stared under Aloe and Vera.

Nothing that would look out-of-place on a mare greeted her panicked eyes, and Twilight relaxed and let out a breath she hadn’t even known she was holding. The purple princess flushed as she realized Aloe and Lotus were giving her puzzled looks, thankfully not realizing Twilight had just, as Rainbow Dash would have said, ‘checked out their goods’, while Luna appeared to now be choking back laughter, rather than looking like she was about to fry the twins with just the heat of her glare.

“Uhm … I’m not exactly sure that’s … possible for me, and I literally just entered a relationship, and I’ve never done anything like this before! I’m fairly certain my marefriend will leave me if I tell her that I want to bring other ponies into the relationship …”

“I would certainly confer with your marefriend before agreeing to anything, Twilight, but consider there are other options should you decide to decline the offer.” Luna stretched one of her massive wings over to stroke Twilight’s back as the purple princess began to shake with the beginnings of a truly massive panic-attack. “We may still go to the Neighponese ambassador and her bodyguards for your ‘samples’, although that will likely come with political burdens, lest we forget the Jade Empress’s obsession with you, or we may simply use Weeaboo’s Spell-Scroll and allow you to monitor the transformation from mare to hermaphrodite first-hoof, and develop a counter-spell that way.”

Twilight gave Luna a look somewhere between relief and nausea, while the Spa-Twins looked shocked, and in the case of Aloe, like she had just been stuck physically.

“But … but we are …” Aloe stammered before her sister swatted her rather hard on the flank with her tail, Vera giving her sister a firm, no-nonsense look that silenced the pink Spa-Pony on the spot.

“I would also recommend you trust the ponies we know. They adore you, Déesse Twilight, and would be heartbroken to hear you wanted only to use them for a cure. Are you truly so set against love, that you would shy away from those who would give their all to you?” The blue twin’s tone was one of stoic condemnation, and Twilight cringed and considered a compromise to alleviate any ill-feelings, even as a voice at the back of her mind screamed OOOOOOOH NONONONONONONONONO at the top of its lungs.

“It … I just haven’t … this relationship ‘stuff’ is all so new to me. And I don’t want to upset my Marefriend.” Stammering herself now, Twilight curled up into a ball on her massage-bed, peering out at the Spa-Twins, then Luna, from under the fringe of her mane. “I also kind of haven’t ever had sex. With a penis, I mean. I’m not a virgin, not after … we … I …”

Twilight face spasmed between shock, outrage, embarrassment and before settling into a bloodless mask of horror, then the newest Princess did a remarkably good impression of Fluttershy, turning herself into an impenetrable purple ball of limbs, mane, tail and wings as a faint “Eeeeeeeeeee” emerged from somewhere within the tangle.

“Perhaps the massage first, then we may continue the game of Twilight-baiting once a certain somepony stops digging herself a deeper hole?” Luna suggested, trying to stop giggle as she gently teased Twilight back into a pony-like shape with both wing-tips and magic, while the Spa-Twins apparently shared another whispered conversation in Prench, a language Luna knew little of other than modern Ponies considered it the ‘language of love’ which seemed darkly ironic to Luna considering the country had been involved in countless bloody revolutions even before Luna’s banishment, before beginning the massage. Our Guards are right outside the building, and if they actually attack Twilight, sexually or otherwise, I’ll throw these Twins through a wall. Perhaps once they start to work we can attempt a more … business-like conversation.

Having another pony ‘walk’ on her seemed odd at first, but Luna had to admit that Lotus knew what she was doing. Every hoof was placed with great care and just the right amount of pressure to reach through the muscle and nudge the knots inside them to relax, to let go. And hoof-fuls of hot, scented oils rubbed into Luna’s fur and skin certainly helped the Lunar Princess to temporarily put aside the fact that she was now certain both Spa-Twins lusted after Twilight, and intended to use their role as middle-ponies in this whole farce to try and wheedle their way between Twilight’s hind-legs.

They cannot be hermaphrodites. As Earth Ponies, they cannot use traditional forms of magic, and thus cannot have withdrawn their organs into their bodies, and surely given their occupation, somepony would have noticed something strange with their bodies …

Luna’s mood, which had been flip-flopping all morning, took a decided turn for the worse as she heard Twilight mewl from the other side of the small room, and whipping her head around, Luna caught sight of an ecstatic expression on Twilight’s face, the young Alicorn’s wings and limbs twitching spasmodically as an equally delighted-looking Aloe performed a massage that Luna could only describe as ‘strangely lewd’, her hooves dancing over Twilight’s shoulder-blades, where wings met body.

“Twilight?” The Lunar Princess couldn’t keep the shock, and hurt, out of her voice as she watched Twilight, her Twilight, making that kind of face under another’s hooves.

“S’good! Luna, you go-uuuoooh! You have to try thiiiiiis!” The smaller purple Alicorn whimpered under Aloe’s hooves, and Luna could not help but blush as she felt the Sympathy awaken between them again, the physical side-effects of Aloe’s massage having a very … pronounced … effect on parts of Twilight the Spa-Pony wasn’t even touching! It was not sexual, not quite, but every touch made Twilight’s body sing, and through the Sympathy, Luna’s body also trembled under the massues’s touch.

“It is a Ponynesian wing-massage, Déesse Luna.” Lotus whispered, her breath hot and sweet in Luna’s ear, startling the Lunar Princess as she had been so focused on Twilight and Aloe, she had not paid any attention to the Pony standing on her back. “We do not perform this type of massage on just anypony. Only those … worthy … of our trust, our affection.”

Faust! These twins might be more dangerous than the Succuponi in their own ri-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Further rational thought was blocked as Lotus planted both fore-hooves on the powerful muscles and thick nerve-clusters at the base of Luna’s wings and pushed, not just with her strength but with an earth-pony’s Innate Magic. It was a sensation of old, one that filled Luna’s mind with the sweet taste of wild strawberries on her tongue, the sensation of freshly turned earth under her hooves and the scent of river-banks in the spring, as her conscious mind tried give itself references to identify the foreign magic entering her body.

Now it was Luna’s turn to make extremely undignified noises as creeping tendrils of power slithered into her muscles, tantalizingly sliding along the edges of her muscle-fibers, coiling with a seductive tingle around her nerves and gliding up and down them that set Luna’s hooves and wings twitching and drumming on the soft mattress underneath her.

It was not a sexual sensation, not an orgasm, but in a pinch Luna would have taken whatever it was that Lotus was doing to her over mere sex. HOLY MOTHER EARTH’S LEFT PLOT-CHEEK! This is Innate Magic? How? HOW DO TWO MASSUSES KNOW AN ANCIENT, LOST MAGICAL ART?

And the Sympathy, that accursed affliction that had driven Luna and Twilight into each other’s hooves, only made things worse as now both Princesses had to deal with the sensations of two very talented massuses using ancient Earth Pony Magic to ‘attack’ them.

However the two Spa-Ponies had managed to unlock and master their Innate Magic, they had obviously fine-tuned it to be devastatingly effective in their day-to-day jobs while keeping their true skills a secret from the public. And worst of all, they kept it a secret from our highly-paid and apparently supremely oblivious Royal Agents! Luna now tried to keep her frustration and panic at the forefront of her mind, to keep her end of the Sympathy under control at least, but every time she tried a breathing exercise, Lotus was there, her damnable magic hooves teasing at part of the thick nerve-cluster under a pegasus’s wing that somehow sent what felt like freight-trains of strange, barely-restrained thrill shooting through Luna’s body, pummelling the Lunar Princess into submission with the lightest of touches.

“Dear sœur, I think our Déesses are beginning to appreciate our point of view.”

“Then perhaps we should give them a sample of the full course we offer to those we pledge our selves to?”

“Oui, perhaps we should.” Lotus giggled and leaned down again, her breath fever-hot against Luna’s ears again, sending a shiver that the elder Alicorn’s neck before Lotus’s hooves dug in, hard, under Luna’s wings. “Worry not, Déesses, this room is sound-proofed by the best materials that bits can buy, nopony can or will hear a thing that happens in here. Simply let yourselves go into our hooves, and let us give you a taste of true Prench hospitality.”

Luna stretched out a wing to Twilight, either to try and grab the other Alicorn and try to run, or just to hold her close as Lotus’s hooves did something and every nerve on Luna’s body decided to go into revolt, and her last memory before everything turned white was the feeling of Twilight’s wing-feathers meshing with and then gripping onto her own.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“No, Cadence, for the last time, Trixie is not Twilight’s marefriend, more like her live-in stalker. Nor is she engaged in a ‘thorny’ relationship with the Crusaders, please have some respect for Twilight’s sense of morality.” Spike scowled, claws wrapped around the handle of another bucket of cold water as a bedraggled-looking pink pony princess’s face began to deform into that terrifyingly happy smile once more. “You need to calm down and think this through rationally, both of you. Somepony comes charging in, demanding the details with no care for how Twilight or her real marefriend feels about their privacy being invaded and wild accusations being thrown around that will cause a lot of bad blood and hurt. What do you think Twilight will do? Our Twilight, easily flustered, adorkably naive when it comes to love, getting thrown into a tizzy by …”

Spike pointed his free claw at Shining, equally sopping wet, who was wrapped in several towels with a hot-water bottle perched precariously on the base of his horn, teeth chattering softly and ruining his attempt to scowl back at the Drake. “… by an older brother who needs to let the buck go and accept his little sister is of legal age and can bump booties with whoever she wants, and I will teleport you to Celestia with my dragon-fire if you try to force the issue. Consider for a moment how my scrolls end up almost always flying into her face if I am forced to send them in a rush, so I’d bet my last gems that you’d land plot-first on her horn. At least that might dislodge this stick you’ve had inserted when nopony was looking. And you …”

Spike’s claw swivelled to point at Cadence, the young drake feeling panic surge inside his mind as flickers of day-glow pink magic cascading through the alicorn’s wet mane once more. “You, of all ponies, should know what happens if you try to meddle in somepony else’s relationship without a damn good reason, or do I need to write to my mother, your aunt, about you needing a few more months with Happy Place to hammer home the concepts of ‘consent’, ‘personal space’ and ‘tone down the creepy, dammit’?”

And finally, Spike’s claw pointed to a sheepish looking Trixie. “And you. Look, I get you like Twilight. I get you like Twilight a lot more than simply ‘liking’ her since you lifted my solid-oak kitchen table with your magic wand when describing how the sunlight shimmered on her mane, but you are not Twilight’s marefriend and I would suggest that telling lies about it will only make my older sister distance herself from you faster than Rainbow Dash flies away from Rarity on two-for-one-deal days at the Ponyville Spa.”

“Uh-uhm … what about us?” Sweetie Belle asked softly after several moments of glaring between Shining and Spike, the very dusty Crusaders cowering beneath the now-heavily dented cauldron Twilight used for her alchemical experiments.

“Apart from ruining my stash of porn, thus far you three haven’t done anything that’d warrant a lecture at this moment.” The small green drake sighed, sagging as he dropped the bucket onto the table’s surface with a loud thump and collapsed into a cross-legged posture. “Look, Twilight will be back in an hour, at most. Can we not cause a diplomatic incident and-slash-or send Twilight into a panicked frenzy that could cause her to go on a control-freak future-proofing spree across the country again?”

“But I have waited so patiently to see where Twilight’s heart would fall …”

“As her older brother, and a former Captain of the Royal Guard, it is my duty …”

“But Trixie truly loves her mistress, and this waiting for Mistress to notice is …”

“I WILL SET YOU ALL ON FIRE.” Spike growled, sparks of emerald flame sizzling as they leaked out from behind his small, sharp teeth. The room went deathly quiet then, before the doorbell rang, and then kept ringing as somebody hammered their hoof on the buzzer. “Coming! Keep your horse-shoes on!” The young drake sighed, swallowing his flames and wincing as they tickled and burned all the way back down into his core.

One final warning glare at the three adults-who-should-know-better sitting at his kitchen table, and Spike stomped towards the library’s front door, praying to Faust Herself that it wasn’t another demented reporter trying to scream him into submission.

But when he opened the door, Spike was greeted with a sight he had never thought possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Twilight?” The purple alicorn groaned, the only calm point in her world right now the feel of Luna’s wing-feathers still meshed with her own, the after-shocks of the Sympathy-fueled spasms slowly fading through their bodies while the Spa-Twins shot the two alicorns nervous looks while whispering to each other in-front of the table where they had their massage-supplies waiting.

“…Present. But that was … far more than I was expecting from a massage.” Twilight whimpered, trying to get up off the massage couch and try to hide, completely embarrassed by the fact that another mare had managed to make her that tingly all over, and in-front of Luna no less, but her limbs remained pleasantly numb and completely unresponsive. “Suh-sorry, Luna, I didn’t mean to … well, do all of that.”

Her body had responded, but it hadn’t felt sexual, even though her body had shuddered and quaked under Aloe’s skilled hooves. That said, Twilight ached all over, and right now slinking off to the spa to soak in the hot water sounded absolutely divine. Except the Spa-Ponies had insisted the Princesses wait while the twins discussed how to handle the Alicorn’s ‘unique’ sensitivity to their massages.

“Considering you must have felt my responses to Lotus’s efforts as I felt your reaction to Aloe’s, I think we’re both very much aware neither of us had much of a chance to resist. That said, I think it is best we take our leave before the masseuses decide to give us another round.” The larger, dusky-blue alicorn said wryly, then grunted, straining to lift herself off the massage-couch and failing utterly to get her legs to obey her. “Drat, I had hoped this would have passed by now. Twilight, normally I would be very much against this, but under the circumstances, I’d be willing to allow you to teleport us out of here and back home.”

“I … don’t think that would be wise right now. My head’s all kinds of fuzzy, and I won’t risk a teleportation spell if I’m not fully awake and mentally prepared. Why don’t you just whisk us up in your tail, like that time with the Manticore in the Everfree Forest?”

“Ugh … I wish I could, but right now I think I could maybe carry myself out the front door before the effect came undone and I’d land flat on my face. Carrying a passenger as spiritually ‘heavy’ as yourself, we’d barely get out of this room before I lost control and we pancaked on the floor.”

“Yes, but we could call for the guards to assist us once we’re out of this room.”

“… Twilight, you do realize we would never live down needing to be rescued from masseuses, yes?”

“I’m more concerned about what the spa-twins will do to us next over what the Royal Guards might think about us. Remember, they said this was a ‘sample’ … what do you think they will do to us if they decide to settle the matter right now with a full course?”

Luna narrowed her eyes, glanced at the spa-ponies, whose own whispered conversation flashed back and forth in Prench, too fast for Luna to even guess at the topic, but the tone of their voices, and the way Aloe’s eyes kept drifting back to Twilight with such longing in them …

“I see your point, but we will still need to avoid the twins as best we can, or this will all be for naught. When I assume my will’o’wisp form it is rather difficult to interact with the material world, and if there is something solid in my path I must either flow around it or find another route to take.”

“Can’t you just flatten your form and go under the door?”

“I meant them attempting to grab us and drag us back to the massage couches, Twilight, but yes I can squeeze us under the door. However, while doing so would not harm me in the slightest, you would still be within my will’o’wisp form, your body and mind transmuted into sentient energy that would be contained within my being. As a being of sentient energy, you would find the experience of my will’o’wisp’s contortions to get through such a narrow space to be a very … traumatic experience.”

“I’ll take whatever you think getting squashed in your personal astral-pocket-dimension-in-your-tail trick will do to me over Aloe turning me into mush right before your eyes again.” Twilight said with finality, giving Luna a glare of her own as the older Alicorn began to splutter a protest. “I will not betray the faith you’ve put in me, the trust between us, because somepony has magic hooves.”

“It could affect your Ascension …”

“Do you really want to see, and feel, me getting molested right in-front of you, twice in one day? Because I don’t want to have to watch you make that face because somepony else is touching you and I can’t move to stop them ever again.”

Luna gave low snort of annoyance, but shook her head in a firm ‘no’ as the Twins own whispered conversation began to get louder and more excited, before a fuming Aloe stormed away to the far corner, and a flushed Lotus walked back to the Princesses.

“Déesses, normally we would not expect such a … strong … reaction to our Ponynesian massages. Is this something unique to Alicorns?” The blue-coated mare asked hesitantly, reluctant to look Luna or Twilight in the face.

In other words, are we supposed to turn to piles of mewling mush with our tails waving in the air? No, definitely not! Twilight thought, fuming with frustration and embarrassment. “U-under normal circumstances, no, but we … we’re stuck in an awkward situation right now, Lotus. My changing into an Alicorn had some, eeeeeh, unusual side-effects, and unfortunately I’ve dragged Luna into it as well. We wouldn’t normally react so strongly, but our bodies are … oh Faust, how do I explain this?”

“What Twilight is trying to say is that we’re currently trapped in a false estrus of sorts. As such, we’re very sensitive right now, as I am sure another Mare can sympathize with, and your ‘talent’ apparently interacts with such a state in a very violent manner.” As Twilight trailed off into incoherent mumbling, Luna took charge of the conversation, trying to appear regal as she could with her body barely-responsive and sprawled across the massage couch like a sack of potatoes. “I think, for today that … Lotus?”

“You are … in estrus? But spring has long passed?” The Spa-Pony flicked her gaze from Luna to Twilight, her expression going from shock to disbelief and then a curious mixture of delight and lust. “Does this mean, my Déesses, that you are, ah, receptive to the essence of a stallion right now? Your body is ready to become that of a mother?”

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeee.” Squealing softly, Twilight managed to levitate a nearby towel over her face as the youngest Alicorn in Equestria began to glow pink with embarrassment and steam began to whistle out of her ears.

“…Yyyyyes, but we are not really looking for a stallion to sire foals on us. We are currently trying to endure the estrus, not indulge in it.” Luna explained after giving a withering look to her fellow Alicorn, whom was apparently contesting Fluttershy’s dominion as the shyest pony in Ponyville. “We are trying to …”

“Our Déesses are in need of a Stallion?” Aloe interrupted, an equally disturbing look on her face as she joined her sister, the two beginning to shift from hoof to hoof as if agitated. “Perhaps the … offer that Déesse Twilight was so reluctant to accept before could be just what you need?”

“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” Twilight yelled from beneath her towel.

“No, we do not need nor want to be bred, please calm down. We are trying to cure three Ponies of an unwanted affliction, not turn Twilight into Equestria’s first Princess to be pregnant without a husband at her side!” Luna added, giving the Spa-Twins a firm glare that did nothing to wipe the eager, lustful looks off their faces.

“Perhaps we could arrange for you to meet the ponies you seek sooner rather than later? Before you leave for Canterlot?” Lotus urged, completely unfazed as Luna’s glare turned into an open scowl that could have melted steel beams at ten paces, before a loud plap noise made Luna’s ears twitch.

That smell … there’s a stallion in the room, an aroused one! The smell at once sent her body screaming for satisfaction, her treasure winking madly under her tail, and filled Luna’s mind with horror. In their current physical condition, neither Twilight nor herself would be able to offer even a token resistance, and given the manic expressions on Aloe and Lotus’s faces, the Spa Twins would be more likely to hold the Princesses down than help them fend off an attacker.

And given their estrus state, it was unlikely the Courts would inflict more than a light punishment on the stallion if he could prove their ‘scent’ triggered his own breeding urges…

But as her eyes roamed around the room, Luna could find nothing, only small ventilation grates barely big enough for a mouse to sneak through, let alone a fully-grown stallion. Which left only four beings in the room as the possible source of the smell, and Luna knew damn well neither she nor Twilight possessed the equipment for it.

Which only left the … oh no. The dreamscape was a reflection of their true nature after all!

Standing slightly ahead of Lotus now, Aloe’s face was rouged with lust, her eyes glazed as the ‘mare’ stared longingly at Twilight, the spa-pony’s body twitching as, with a long, low groan, the pink-coated mare threw her head back, her hind legs spasmed and a now-familiar spread of black-coloured fur began to grow beneath her barrel, appearing between her hind legs and swelling in size as a rapidly hardening shaft all but thrust itself out, a steady stream of pre-cum oozing from the flaring head.

“And that is our cue to leave!” The Lunar Princess bellowed, Twilight began to hyperventilate, and Aloe advanced upon the two Alicorns. Luna’s mane swelling and wrapping itself around the smaller Alicorn before ‘consuming’ Luna in turn, the billowing piece of star-studded night sky zipping over the heads of the startled, lust-addled spa-twins and then squeezing under the doorway, popping out from underneath and floating unsteadily into the air before unfolding after twitching spasmodically just above the ground, dropping Luna and a very green-faced Twilight onto the ground, where they lay in a pile, their limbs still unresponsive.

“Déesses?!”

“Please come back, we wish only to serve you in your time of need!”

Twilight looked at Luna.

Luna looked at Twilight.

A thin haze of purple magic surrounded the door’s hinges, while Luna’s tail swirled up to hold the door-handle in a death grip as both Princesses took a deep breath.

Twilight screamed “HELP!” and Luna bellowed “GUARDS!” at the top of their lungs, hoping the beleaguered Royal and Night Guards outside the health-center could get to them in time as the door began to rattle on its hinges, and the voices from the other side of the door became far more demanding that Luna and Twilight allow the Spa-Twins to ‘serve’ them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia, Discord and Dawn Ray sat in Celestia’s private rooms, the Chaos-God having had a vigorous bath to remove the last tenacious remains of Celestia’s fruity drink from his fur, feathers and scales, as the Solar Princess read the latest ‘diplomatic’ letter from Equestria’s neighbours, Celestia’s mood somewhat improved from the debacle with parliament courtesy of a shoulder-rub from Dawn Ray and a tray of her favourite cakes from the kitchens.

“I wasn’t aware the leader of Labrynthia was concerned about Twilight. They’ve had good relations with Equestria for the past four hundred years, ever since you negotiated a cease-fire between themselves, the Diamond Dog packs and our nation.” Dawn Ray mumbled, eyeing the letters Discord was holding as if expecting it to explode at any given moment. Though whether it was because it was Discord holding it, or the contents of said letters, was up for debate.

“The Phennex is dealing with many issues right now due to hard-line conservatives within her clergy taking offence at her overtures of peace to the Maze Replic. As soon as Cadence, Shining Armor and Ambassador Silicate began to negotiate a cease-fire between Labrynthia and the Maze Republic, Phennex Klain has been facing challenges to her position, both in the political arena and in the Ring of Trials nearly every day.” The Princess explained, sighing and taking a bite out of one of the last eclairs, savouring the taste of the fresh, fluffy cream, the smooth vanilla of the custard and the rich dark chocolate on-top of the light, sweet pastry crust. Faust alone knew how much Celestia needed to wash the bitter taste of today out of her mouth … and to distract her from what Discord had said earlier to her about leaving Equestria to its fate. “Phennex Klain was, the last time we spoke privately, doing everything in her power to buy Silicate enough time to get the cease-fire locked into place and stop another Heresy War with the Maze Republic, so I am highly doubtful that she is being serious about her ultimatum in that letter.”

“But what about the letter from the President of the Maze Republic? High Scholar Caulic was basically demanding we hand over Twilight so she could extract the secret of how to turn mortals into ‘gods’.” Dawn Ray protested, pounding his hoof on the offending letter, which was already besmirched with droplets of coffee from his previous spit-take upon reading it.

“Caulic is a maniac, but an impotent one, mostly. She was made aware of the fact her peoples’ ‘God’ does actually exist shortly after ascending to her position, and was told by Vulcan himself that he was very much uninterested in the secular dispute that has caused the Maze Republic and Labrynthia to form from the original Minotaur empire after centuries of civil war amongst the Minotaurs … mostly because both sides were wrong in the first place and Vulcan had become disgusted with how his people were abusing his name as an excuse to commit atrocities against each other.” The Princess took an entirely undignified bite of her pasty, over half the morsel disappearing as her expression turned pensive. “Needless to say, as a militant athiest who had built her entire career around the concept that divine entities did not exist and religion was merely another tool to control the ‘ignorant masses’ as she so delightfully described her people, Caulic did not take the revelation that divine entities were real well at all, and was even less able to handle the fact that Vulcan found her belligerence towards his very existence utterly hilarious. Thankfully the rest of her Council are far removed from Caulic’s extremism and egotism and are keeping her in check until her term as the High Scholar comes to an end next year.”

“Are we even going to discuss the mountain of letters from the various caliphs, warlords and kings of the ironically-named United States of Gryphonia?” Nibbling pensively on an cherry tart that stubbornly regenerated with every bite, Discord lifted the longest of the letters from the Gryphons to read it, his eyes widening they absorbed the harsh, angular script the gryphons used, and how the script became larger and more irregular as the letter progressed, the demands in said letter become more furious and blood-thirsty the further down the letter he went. “Demanding we surrender our ‘purple false-goddess whorse’ so they can revive some God called Asha’Ramahn? Last time I checked, the Powers made it abundantly clear that Gods are not allowed to set up cults on worlds controlled by Immortals, unless explicitly directed to do so by the Powers themselves.”

“Asha’Ramahn is not a God, thank the Powers for small mercies, despite what the Gryphons’ Priesthood claims. Once, they were two very powerful and ruthless Princelings, the second and third sons of a powerful and peaceful Calpih with whom I and the other Immortals had made great strides with in pacifying and uplifting the Gryphons. Asha and Ramahn stepped in at the moment I was overseeing the first steps of their elder brother’s Ascension, and slew poor, noble Khollok with vile spellwork the likes of which I have not seen since … since a much darker era. The backwash of their evil magic, and the backlash from the Powers at having such a sacred event profaned, fused the two murders together into a single form and darkening the destiny of their entire species.” Celestia’s face darkened, and the light outside the room from the sun turned a slightly harsher shade before the Alicorn shook her head, the light returning to its natural state. “Even if I was insane enough to offer up Twilight to placate them, there is no ritual, no sacrifice, powerful enough to restore the ‘Twinned God’ to life. Luna and I used the Elements of Harmony to bring peace to their army of marauders and shatter Asha’Ramahn’s sorcerous control over their people. While the conjoined sorcerers squabbled over whose fault it was that mere ‘prey’ could undo all their work, I struck their aberrant form down myself and split the body apart into a dozen pieces, sealing the remains around the globe in the care of powerful guardians. Where their spirits ended up, only Gothica knows, and she refuses to speak of what happens in Tartarus unless it serves her own agendas.”

“So you’re saying this is the ranting of a fanatical cult who believes their abomination of a deity just needs a blood sacrifice to revive?” Dawn Ray asked in disbelief, while Discord went deathly pale and chewed on one of his eagle talons in nervous thought.

“The Gryphons’ priesthood believes they can revive Asha’Ramahn if only they find a suitable offering to sacrifice over the assembled pieces of their dead ‘deity’. Whole bloodlines, entire families, of their own people who had even the barest link to the ancient princes Asha, Ramahn or even Khollok himself have been sacrificed on the altars of the Twinned God for no benefit, ancient and irreplaceable relics unearthed, drained of every scrap of power and discarded like a child’s broken toy, simply because Luna and I missed a hoof-ful of the Twinned Gods’ priesthood after putting down Asha’Ramahn and their ‘crusade’ to bring the world under the claws of the Gryphons.”

“A few months after our victory and once the various ‘states’ of Gryphonia began to recover from the atrocities their ‘Twinned God’ had inflicted upon the Gryphon Tribes, these surviving priests started a desperate lie and called it a prophecy to retain control over the remaining Gryphons that hadn’t needed the Twinned God’s sorcery to drive them onwards and had enjoyed the slaughter and pillaging of their deviant masters’ crusade. Sadly this cult has grown and spread from the shadows until every Tribe, Clan and Nation within Gryphonia harbours at least a handful of cultists amongst their leaders.” Sighing and standing up from her desk, Celestia looked over her shoulder and gazed over Canterlot’s gleaming sprawl, at the hundreds of thousands of Ponies who lived, dreamed and thrived under her benevolent rule. “In reality, their so-called prophecy holds no power, no ability to alter the future since they lacked any wizards potent enough to invoke the necessary forces to bend the primal forces to their cause … and various ‘Seers’ and factions within their degenerate cult have all put their own personal spin on it over the centuries to further their own agendas, twisting the prophecy’s meaning back and forth as the various factions vied for supremacy against each other. All the factional posturing and self-aggrandizement from the Cult aside, the ‘prophecy’ of the Twinned God claims that any Gryphon who can revive the Twinned God will be granted eternal life and serve forever as the right claw of the Twinned God, second only to their masters in authority.”

“And we combine such a prophecy with the infamous greed and pride of the Gryphons, and their race-wide contempt for herbivores … well. That explains why the Gryphonese Army would risk antagonising you like this after you turned their largest military camp in living memory into a crater full of melted glass and metal slag.” The acting Captain of the Royal Guard eyed the mountain of ‘diplomatic’ correspondence from Gryphonia, kept separate from the other nations’ piles to avoid a ‘mistake’, many of the scrolls and letters written on vellum rather than paper, and blanched slightly.

The pile of angry letters from the disparate leaders of the United States of Gryphonia was only slightly smaller than the pile from the rest of the known world. Slightly.

“Thankfully, not all of it is bad news. Down Unda has requested for the entire royal family of Equestria to ‘pop down’ for a visit at their next Bar-Bhee-Que, and the Choir of Undersea are quite eager to have a chance to talk to Twilight and add her story to their eternal song.” Celestia’s face quirked into the slightest hint of a smile as she nodded to two very different correspondences, one a simple letter that had contained several invitations, the other a scroll made from a single long strand of sea-weed that had been bleached white, the rollers carved from mother of pearl and capped on each end with brilliant pink coral growths.

“May I come when you visit Down Unda? I’ve never actually been to one of their feasts, but I’m told it is something of an experience?” The serpentine Chaos-God asked plaintively, his gangly face splitting into an earnest grin.

“That is a given, Discord. Of course you’re coming, it says the entire royal family.” Smiling back at Discord, Celestia raised an eyebrow at the serpentine chimera. “Besides, I suspect Twilight might need us to, ah, intercede and give her a graceful way to escape the Bhar-Bhee-Que as the night progresses. I don’t believe Twilight has ever drunk anything stronger than my black-label cider, and the Down Undan’s tend to, what is the phrase, party hard when something momentous happens.”

“I don’t know, I think a drunken Twilight would be hilarious to watch. At the very least, her dancing can only improve, because it certainly can't get any worse.”

“I must agree with Discord, Princess Celestia. Letting Princess Twilight blow off some steam with the Down Undans might be a blessing in disguise. They’re a very tolerant and, ah, earthy people, so I suspect they’ll take any neurotic tendencies your student may display in stride and with good humor.” The aging Royal Guard smirked as Princess Celestia stuck out her tongue at both males. “Also, most of our more hostile detractors refuse to leave Equestria due to the other nations of the world having far less tolerance to an antagonistic media, and our nobility are obsessed with the idea that Canterlot is truly the center of Equuis and have focused all their power into the capital. Having our newest Royal let her mane down somewhere where there’s nobody who is going to throw any lapses back in her face for the rest of time sounds like a solid plan to me.”

“I don’t disagree, but which nations Twilight visits first will sway opinions quite heavily, as well as risking offending those nations she doesn’t visit. Having a world-saving hero coming to your country to shake your hoof, claw or whatever appendage you have does wonders for your image amongst the people, and not visiting a country could be construed as snubbing or siding against them, given how paranoid global politics have become in this day and age.” Celestia countered, but her expression had shifted again to a sad smile. “That said, I haven’t been to Down Unda in ages, and it feels like forever since Twilight and I just sat down and talked to one another without one world-ending threat after another knocking on the door.”

Celestia paused, raising a hoof to her mouth and narrowed her eyes in thought, as Discord and Dawn Ray began sorting through the hopefully-friendly correspondence from the other nations of Equuis. She’d forgotten something rather vital, and her turn of phrase has just reminded her of the … urgent necessity of resolving the matter.

“Speaking of knocking on the door, if you gentle-beings will excuse me, I believe a visit to Bedside Manner is in order. Please, carry on without me, I expect I shall not be longer than an hour at most.”

“May I ask why, your majesty?” Dawn Ray piped up as Celestia reached the doorway, and the Princess paused, wondering exactly how much she could say without sending Discord running, or whatever the unpredictable Chaos-God would think was ‘appropriate’, if she explained she might be pregnant. And how she might stop loyal, stoic Dawn Ray from attempting to choke the Chaos-God to death on the spot if he learned about his Princess's 'indiscretion'.

“I am going to ask the Royal Physician for some advice on the issue of the Royal Family expanding, both with Twilight’s Ascension … and perhaps a new Princess or Prince joining us in the near future.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“At least we can walk now.” Luna sighed and shook a fore-leg to illustrate the point, while Twilight merely kept her head hanging low as the Royal and Night Guards, many of them covered in dust and sporting bruises, shuffled as an honor guard around the Princesses, the earth ponies wielding their shields as a ever-shifting defence against the relentless horde of reporters that had chased the party all the way from the health-center, while the thestrals that could still fly hovered directly over the ground-bound Princesses to block flying or levitating reporters trying to get that lucky shot over the top of the Royal Guards’ shields.

“Majesties … no, we should wait until you are safely returned to the library before you explain what we saw back … there.” Guard Bulwark grunted, checking a reporter with his heavy, rectangular shield as the deranged-looking mare charged the Princesses, camera held high in one hoof, and the loud thump and muffled curse as the reporter slammed face-first into the thick, steel-bound oak shield sweet, guiltily-enjoyed music to Twilight’s ears.

“I’d appreciate that, Bulwark. We’ve had a truly vexing morning, and quite frankly, if something else goes wrong today I might just flip out on principle.” Twilight lifted her head just long enough to catch the eyes of another reporter dancing back and forth outside the guards’ barricade of shields, which promptly set the lanky pegasus screeching at her for answers about ‘the truth of your wings’ and ‘role in the downfall of Equestria’. “Actually, I wonder if acting out will make these Powers you speak of, Luna, decide I’m actually unworthy after all and I’ll lose these wings, my Princesshood and hopefully this crowd of lunatics that keep following us around.”

“Sadly Twilight, once the, ah, process starts, nothing can stop it, not even death. And the only one of our … extended family who tried that particular form of escape ended up the Immortal of the Dead for her efforts. Poor tragic Gothica, who rules over Tartarus as the Overseer of that infernal prison and oversees the passage of mortal souls into the Great Beyond … and can never again walk in the world of the living.” Twilight dipped her head in defeat at Luna’s whispered words. So even that way out won’t work … I wish Luna had told me that earlier, but I guess even suggesting that method of escaping this fate would be far too grim for most conversations, and given how Luna and I are … yes, that probably would end up with Luna all but smothering me to keep me safe from myself, or starting a feud between her and Celestia that might cause tremendous issues for the world in general.

But at least Luna will tell me about these things when I ask her, unlike Celestia who has said nothing to me about any of this for … most of my life, now that I think about it! How deep does this rabbit-hole go, and where do the Princess of the Sun’s fabrications end and the real history of this world begin? Twilight thought to herself bitterly as she tried to block out the horrid din made by the frustrated royal guards and the screaming, shouting mob of reporters all around her. I want to trust the Princess, I do, but this flies in the face of everything she taught me, about being honest, about being a good pony. But Luna said that our Hearthwarming legends are just stories, that the ancient ponies who left Equestria to found Stalliongrad, Neighpone and Ponynesia were all militant tribalists that only survived because Celestia intervened before they got to engage in an orgy of mutual genocide over whose Tribe Celestia originally sprang from, and that would have been a repeat of the same conflict that brought my people over the Dragonspine Mountains at the roof of the world thousands of years ago.

I guess I really can’t know if my trust is misplaced or not until I speak to Princess Celestia directly … but how will I know if she’s telling the truth, or if it is yet more lies and half-truths? Gaaaaah! This is like a Serpentis riddle-rude, there’s no way to get an answer until you find where both head and tail are!

“Twilight? We’re nearly home.” Luna’s voice, soft with concern, roused Twilight from her bitter musings, and the purple Alicorn lifted her head to give her marefriend a wan smile. “I think bunkering down in your bedroom for the rest of the day sounds like a solid plan … although I think perhaps a letter to my sister, asking for Happy Place to expedite herself to Ponyville may be our first order of business after we ensure the Library is cleared of all reporters and snitches.”

“You want to send a letter to Princess Celestia to ask for the Royal Therapist to come to Ponyville immediately?”

“Yes.”

“Luna, I freely admit to being neurotic and having an unhealthy amount of obsessive-compulsive behaviours, but …”

“No no, I don’t mean it that way. While I must point out that the … physical half of our current situation comes from my side of things, I meant your reaction at the Health Center. That is not normal, not even for a mare of your sheltered lifestyle, especially when you consider the state our hormones are in right now. You need to see Happy Place right now, not months from now when the trauma has had a chance to set down roots.” Luna’s wing reached out and pulled Twilight closer, as much for emotional comfort as protection as the circle of guards around them tightened as the reporters swarmed the Royal Guards in a berserk fury.

Judging from at least half the screaming and demands being hurled at the Princesses, the paparazzi had learned the hard way that Twilight’s new slew of protective spells on the Golden Oaks Library also included reactive wardings that played merry hell with cameras and other magically-powered recording devices, with results ranging from instantly draining the mana-batteries and causing the internal mechanisms to seize up to over-writing the recordings with Pinkie Pie singing ‘this is the song that never ends’ over and over, should such devices be brought inside the living library or even within a short radius around the tree, and in retaliation the parasitic journalists had upped their game considerably, trying to overwhelm the Royal Guard’s shields through sheer force of numbers.

“My friends, especially Rarity, need her more. I’ve lived with my mental health issues for most of my life, a few more weeks won’t matter.”

“Twilight. Eternity. As a paranoid, neurotic wreck. Potentially with control over all forms of arcane magic on the planet.” Luna’s voice was heavy with concern, and Twilight winced at the weight of it. “You will be seeing Happy Place first, and as often as we can arrange it.”

“Happy Place is bringing some colleagues, isn’t she?”

“The message I sent via the Royal Agents’ private telegraph line insisted on at least six different mind healers accompanying Happy Place, meaning one for each Bearer and little Spike as well. The only pony who can amend that order is my sister, and I doubt Celestia will risk any further harm to her student or her friends once she reads the letter. I am certain a second letter asking for Happy Place to move down here faster than planned will not be met with too much fuss.” Luna whispered into Twilight’s ear as the circle of guards rounded the last corner and her library, and blessed privacy, was finally within sight, although the crushed-limestone path to the library’s front door felt woefully under-defended to Twilight’s mind after several block’s worth of being surrounded by stalwart Royal Guards, albeit two Royal Guards were standing guard outside the doorway. But their uniforms are all wrong… “That said, consider that Happy Place will be overseeing every one of the mind healers, so while she may not be directly helping your friends, she will still be able to direct her comrades with the same tact and confidence she has displayed with my sister and I during our sessions.”

“I … guess that’s alright, I just think Rarity needs Happy Place’s skills more than I do. I didn’t have a psychotic break-down due to a fragment of creation itself throwing a hissy-fit in the back of my skull.” Twilight grumbled, wincing as Generosity started, for lack of a better explanation for the sensations it was causing, throwing furniture around in the small corner of her mind where Magic had barricaded the rogue Element of Harmony, before Magic made itself known as well, smothering Generosity beneath a blanket of void and sending waves of apology and embarrassment at her before, again, somehow sealing Twilight’s senses off from the conflict. I will never get used to the fact I have had a sentient entity sharing my head, a silent witness able to watch everything I have done, seen and felt and is capable of completely locking me out of parts of my own mind at will.

“I will be assisting Happy Place with Lady Rarity’s recovery, in-between my duties as the Shepherd of the Night and being at your side, but until we can find a way to deal with Generosity’s … whatever it did to her, then I fear treading softly around your friend and keeping her safe from herself as well as outside forces is the best we can do for now.” The Lunar Princess grunted as a Royal Guard was pushed into her side by a particularly determined knot of reporters before, with a loud grunt of his own, the Guard pushed back with both muscle and shield, pushing the reporters back into those behind them and starting a vicious squabble between those belonging to rival companies. “I have already requested that the Mother of Stones intercede, but she works on a geological scale. She could arrive tomorrow, she might show up a few centuries from now.”

“Oh goody, another all-powerful entity nobody but your sister and you know about.” Twilight grumbled as, inch by hard-won inch, the knot of guards managed to push their way through the crowd towards the Library’s front door. “And how is a rock-mothering Immortal going to help with Rarity and the Elements?”

“Mother of Stones, Twilight, and she is not Immortal, simply older than organic life itself and, as such, knows a great deal about how our universe was born, and how. Be incredibly respectful if you should ever meet her, for she is the literal foundation upon which Equis was built by the Powers, the first Elemental to be spawned by the cosmos in our corner of the galaxy, and she has a very low opinion about organic life due to certain nations having a habit of enslaving the smallest of the Earth Elementals to serve as miners and brute labourers.” The two Princesses looked at the library with longing as their circle of defenders finally reached the front gate, and the hope of sanctuary from the insanity of their morning’s adventures, while the paparazzi howled in frustration and dismay behind them, unwilling to risk their expensive, borderline illegal equipment to the effects of Twilight’s defensive wards. “All Elementals that draw their nature from stone, earth and metal are her children, and in turn all such Elementals obey her as their mother and monarch. Since the Elements, and the ‘tree’ they sprang from, were all of Elemental origins, then it stands to good reason that the Mother of Stones may have a great deal of influence over them, perhaps inspite of the Powers imbuement of celestial energies, and she could offer us insight into how to cure Rarity’s condition.”

“Well, it’s a good place to start, at least.” Twilight whispered back as the two Princesses’s hooves hit the limestone path with a soft crunch … and Twilight paused for a second as she regarded the two Guards standing watch outside the door to her library and finally put names to their faces.

“Flash Sentry? And you are … Adamant?” The purple Princess scowled at the orange-coated Pegasus, who merely shrugged and rolled his eyes, while the violet Crystal Pony saluted smartly.

“Your Majesties, The Crystal Princess, Mi Amore Cadenza and her Royal Consort, Lord Shining Armor await you within.” Adamant, ever the picture of the perfect soldier, knocked on the door with several loud, precise raps of his crystalline hoof. Twilight, however, fixed her best steel-melting-glare on Flash, who sweated visibly but maintained eye-contact until the door swung open, a grumpy-looking Spike standing in the doorway with a much-dented pan in his free claw.

“Spike? What are my brother and sister-in-law … and this thing doing here?” Twilight snapped, pointing a hoof at Flash Sentry and making the pegasus jump slightly in place.

“Come inside and I’ll explain … and please, try to be calm. Princess Celestia sent a letter saying that Pinkie is on a train back to Ponyville, but could you please not teleport random Ponies into her bedroom in the future?” The young drake urged the two Princesses inside, Twilight doing a remarkable impression of Owlicious as she walked past the Crystal Guard, swivelling her head to keep that steel-melted glare fixed on Flash Sentry until the door was slammed shut by Spike. “Okay, before we go into the kitchen to see the family, Twilight, Shining Armor is on the warpath because he believes you’ve been ‘seduced’ to be used as a tool against the country, and Cadence is … well, you remember how she used to go ship-crazy about the characters in your comics back when she used to babysit us?”

“Oh Faust, with the photos and colour-coded push-pins and strings?” Twilight groaned, going slightly pale. “And she’s made a ship-chart about me?”

“Shining let slip that she repurposed a ballroom in the western wing of the Crystal Palace because otherwise she wouldn’t have had the room for all the potential ‘ship-mates’.”

Twilight’s response was to simply groan softly and cover her face with a hoof, while Luna looked back and forth between the two mis-matched siblings, obviously confused.

“I was not aware that Cadence had any … nautical tendencies.” She said, raising an eyebrow at the young drake.

“No, no, he means ‘shipping’ as romantically pairing individuals or groups even though they are not involved with each other. A lot of Ponies do it with their favourite characters from novels, comics, even the movies.” Twilight explained as the trio shuffled into the kitchen. “Well, let’s just get this over with, then I’m going to bed.”

“Uh, but it’s still so early?” Spike pointed out nervously as the two Princesses faces darkened.

“Believe me, sir Spike, we have earned an early turn-in today. Also, if Aloe and Lotus show up on the doorstep … send them away. Or set them on fire. Either works for right now.” The Lunar Princess said with feeling as they rounded the corner into the kitchen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shining had just managed to deflect Cadence from leaping up to go looking for Twilight by throwing this ‘Trixie’ under the proverbial wagon, his currently-deranged wife latching back onto the blue Mare with the strange, solid-gold torc around her neck and bizarre tail, demanding every detail about how Twilight and her ‘Marefriend’ acted around each other and similar minutiae that, quite frankly, no brother needed to know about their sister’s sex-life.

And strangely enough, despite a vigorous and nearly molestion-like round of interrogation from Cadence, the former show-mare hadn’t actually given him a name to work with yet! Desperate to escape the akwardness and the pleading eyes of the poor blue mare, Shining had gotten up to follow Spike, telling himself it was to help his little brother if it was another demented reporter looking for a scoop and not escaping from his ship-crazed wife.

Spike’s threat had been shocking enough that it had thrown Shining back, mentally, and forced him to fight down the blind panic that his naive little sister, who would forever be enshrined in his mind’s eyes as that tiny little filly who followed him everywhere with adoring, trusting eyes, had been seduced and turned to evil by Changelings … or just some malicious Pony seeking a quick advancement up the social ladder, either by marrying Twilight or using her as a springboard to enter into the notoriously vicious social-circles of Canterlot.

“Twilie, oh thank Faust, we’ve got … Twilie?” Shining Armor perked up as he heard the murmur of Twilight's voice from the doorway, and he rushed around to the entrance of the library to greet her, full of nervous energy, before taking a closer look at Twilight’s expression and feeling his fears about changeling plots to seduce and corrupt his sister with a ‘sudden’ change to an alternative lifestyle fading away before the simple, all-consuming love for his family as he took in the fatigued posture, the bags under her eyes and the way Twilight flinched away from contact with him like a shell-shocked soldier might.

“Hey BBBFF … can I just say your timing sucks.” Twilight grunted, inching towards him and extending a hoof rather than their usual bear-hug, and the Royal Consort gave her hoof a quick shake, holding onto the limb for only a few moments before Twilight withdrew, causing Shining to shoot a questioning look at Princess Luna, who just shook her head and mouthed ‘later’.

“Indeed, Royal Consort, I fear your visit is most … unexpected. Perhaps you could come back at a later time?” Princess Luna gave Shining a look he had only seen Celestia produce once before and had nearly reduced him to tears on the floor, and that had been the day after he and Cadence had crossed the line from merely dating to being an actual couple …

“Well, you see Cadence and I went into panic-mode when we learned that Queen Chrysalis had snuck into the Equestria once again, courtesy of Princess Celestia’s ideology, and then our attempt to get Queen Chrysalis kicked out of the country was derailed after we were told by Princess Celestia that Twilight had, suddenly, decided she was a lesbian …” Shining began, before being interrupted by the two Princesses before him, both their faces scrunching up with frustration and anger.

“That bitch.” The Princesses said together in low-pitched voices.

“… Aaaaaaaaand we came rushing down because both Cadence and I were concerned this was some labyrinthian ploy by the Changelings to convert or corrupt Twilight again while we were all distracted by Chrysalis. You do have to admit that this is … very out of character for you, Twilie, liking mares that way, I mean. Oh Faust this is going to be awkward.” The Royal Consort finished, leaning back slightly from Twilight and Luna as his gaze flicked over them, noting their mussed manes, haggard expressions and the dullness of their eyes. “We were actually hoping Twilight might be willing to stand up to Princess Celestia with us to get the Changeling’s Queen thrown back across the border. Your sister might be willing to ignore Cadence and myself as ‘foreign’ leaders now, but I doubt she can honestly discard the advice of her beloved student.”

For some reason, that only made Luna and Twilight scowl more. Shining hoped the ill-feelings the two were suffering were not focused on him. With the way Princess Celestia had been behaving yesterday, Shining suddenly found the concept of having three Immortals pissed off at him almost worse than having Chrysalis running amok and wondering if rushing down from the Crystal Empire as they had was not the worst damn decision he and Cadence had ever made.

“I am intending to return to Canterlot and have a long, pointed discussion with my sister about her decision to single-hoofedly open diplomatic relations with the Changelings, rather than consulting with myself as her fellow Diarch, and Twilight …” Luna sighed and patted Twilight across the shoulders with a wing, and Shining felt his heart melt a little as Twilight leaned into her fellow princess, eyes closing with what looked like fatigue as his sister rested her head against Luna’s long, graceful neck. “Twilight has some questions about Equestria’s distant past that are in dire need of answers.”

I guess we’re all very lucky that Luna is willing to leave her duties for a short while to be Twilight’s shield during these trying times. All those years wondering if my little sister was ever going to reconnect with another Pony after he left our house-hold, and now here she is, close as two peas in a pod with the Princess of Standoffishness, of all Ponies. Will wonders never cease? Shining thought to himself, nodding as much in response to Luna’s words as the thought that his shy, socially-awkward sister had become so adept at befriending others, even the scary ones like Princess Luna.

“Well, be that as it may, Cadence and I are both here for the day due to some … shenanigans from the three Generals and Princess Celestia herself. If you need some time to recuperate, I can drag Cadence out of your manes and come visit tomorrow. Maybe even draw some of the paparazzi out of your tails?” The white-coated Unicorn offered, wanting dearly to know the answers to his questions, but the sight of his sister drove all his fears away with the force of his compassion for her current state. “Just … tell us who your marefriend is soon, will you? Cadence has worked herself into a lather trying to figure it out and I don’t want to have to deal with my wife in the middle of a shipping frenzy while we’re trying to save Equestria from the Changelings again.”

Twilight and Luna shared a surprised look, while Spike merely covered his face with a claw and gave a great, gusty sigh.

“Uh, it isn’t obvious?” Twilight said, lifting her head from Luna’s neck to give him an annoyed look.

“No, else Cadence would probably not be giving your live-in maid the Spanyard Inquisition treatment on whom you’re dating right now.”

Twilight and Luna turned to look at each other, an expression of shock on their faces, as they said together. “Dating …”

“Please, tell me you’re at least playing hard to get, Twilight. The last thing you need is to be the ‘easy’ Princess in the eye of the public. Faust knows I had to lean on Flash with all the leverage I had to keep his ‘version’ of your date out of the public arena.”

“That’s none of your business, but I trust my marefriend to keep our private lives just that, private.” Twilight shot back, colouring significantly and wrapping a wing around Luna, probably for support Shining thought to himself, considering the way this conversation is going.

“I can assure you, Shining Armor, that I am keeping very close tabs on Twilight’s sexual adventures.” Luna said, a sudden smirk appearing on her face as both Spike and Twilight performed spit-takes. “Indeed, one could even say I am ‘hock-deep’ in this matter.”

Twilight was possessed by a sudden cough-fit that left her spitting half-words and noises caused her to go cross-eyed. Spike turned green … or green-er than usual. Shining simply gave her a puzzled look.

“Well that’s good to know that I can leave Twilight in your capable hooves, Princess Luna.”

“Oh do not worry, Shining, my hooves are quite capable, isn’t that right, Twilight.”

“I will end you.” Twilight squeaked out, flushing so heavily that for a moment, Shining thought he was looking at a miniature version of his wife.

“Riiiight. Look, Twilie, we’re just wanting to make sure you don’t get hurt. I’m sure that Princess Luna can teach you the ropes.” Shining tried to take a soothing tone to his frazzled sister. “Relationships are a lot like reefs, Twilight. Not the easiest thing for a novice to navigate.”

“The ropes, huh? Well, perhaps that’s what we need to include in our next, ah, study session, wouldn’t you say, Twilight?” Luna asked, that smirk turning into a wicked grin as Twilight skipped flushing and went to flat-out glowing neon-pink with steam leaking out her ears.

“Ugh, that’s another kink destroyed, thanks guys.” Spike grumbled, sticking a claw in each of his ear-holes with a look of disgust on his face.

“But worry not, Shining, you can be assured that I am quite happy to advise Twilight on how to handle her marefriend. She is a quick and eager study, after all. I would not be surprised if your sister has me singing her praises all over Equestria before her Ascension is over.”

For some reason, this had Twilight curling up into a ball by Luna’s hooves with her newly-grown wings plastered over her own face.

Confused at Luna’s phrasing and more than a little alarmed at Twilight’s shenanigans, Shining Armor opened his mouth, only to feel the breath choke in his throat as a familiar pressure made itself known behind him.

“Squeeeeeeeeee….”

“Oh dear sweet Faust, not again.” Spike and Shining groaned together as the three ponies and one drake all turned around to look at the disaster behind them.

Cadence stood at the entrance to the kitchen, her mane and tail writhing with a life of their own, neon-pink magic flowing through them and around the blue unicorn that was currently suspended in the air by that flowing tail, white foam spilling out her her mouth and a blush on her face. The Alicorn of Love’s face was set into a terrifying, manic grin as that awful “Squeeeee” noise just built and built and built.

“Abandon the library, Crusaders and Drakes first, everypony else second!” The Crusaders yelled, rushing past the pink Demon of Love and tackling Spike in the process, dragging him down into the basement as, frozen by some primal instinct that belonged to their ancient ancestors when facing a terrible predator, the adults in the room remained stock-still, barely breathing.

“Niece, you must …” Luna began, going pale-faced before taking a step backwards.

It proved to be the wrong move.

Seeing her ‘prey’ attempting to retreat, Cadence lunged forwards, in the full grasp of her power, and her favourite hobby, her mane and tail billowing in size to the point that Shining was flattened against the wall by his wife’s animated hair, his head jarring painfully against the living oak, as she pounced on Twilight and Luna, that manic grin growing impossibly large as the other two Princesses stammered and flailed, trying vainly to escape the clutches of Cadence’s hair.

“Tell. Me. Everything.” Cadence squee’d loud enough to make Shining’s ears ring with pain, but the blow against his temples made the world swim and start to blacken.

I never did learn who Twilight was dating … was Shining’s last thoughts before blessed darkness claimed him and spared him from a front-row seat of Cadence’s interrogation on his sister’s sex-life.

Chapter 64

CHAPTER 64

“So that’s everything? Nobody’s left anything absolutely necessary behind? Nothing incriminating towards our plans? Last minute toilet break?” Night Light asked loudly, the other ponies in the room either shaking their heads or shouting back their replies, but the atmosphere of the room felt more like the anticipation of heading out to a festival than the start of a stealth mission.

Great. We’ve got to get a baker’s dozen worth of civilians out of the house, which is being monitored by the Muckrakers, Murdock and Stump’s hired slander-factories, let alone whatever eyes the Shadow Court has fixed on us, and the only thing we’ve got to aid us is a handful of Royal Guards still green as grass out of basic, and whatever tricks this bunch of old veterans have up their sleeves. Despite his grumbling, Night Light felt like grinning. Even with the odds stacked against them, even with how dire things could get if the Shadow Court nabbed them before the Bronze Leaves, as the former soldiers had come to call their rag-tag bunch, and their spouses and partners could escape from Canterlot, it felt good to be doing something other than sitting, waiting for the hammer to fall.

Flames of Tartarus, the Princess herself was onboard with the idea, and that had been an encounter that Night Light and Thunderwing had been expecting to be a knock-down drag-out argument with the Princess of the Sun. Instead, the Princess had agreed immediately once the plan had been explained to her, given them a scroll dictating that the Thunderwing and ‘the Ponies in her care’ were to be granted anything they wished for, within certain conditions, if the scroll was presented to a Royal Guard Stable or civilian authority within Equestria, and then turned around and told them she’d be waiting eagerly for their ‘publicity’ assault on the Shadow Court.

“For centuries, I have tried to passively change their minds, stop their bigotry, trying to not cause a confrontation that might start a civil war or cause bloodshed, and all my efforts and the sacrifices of those who followed my plans have been for naught. Perhaps your plan will provide the impetus, however violent, needed to either drag these self-important fools out of their beloved shadows and into the light, into the sight of the ponies they would oppress … the backlash alone could end this stalemate, burn the Shadow Courts’ ambitions down around their ears as the individual Noble houses that make up its’ ranks start to throw each other onto the fire to save themselves. They certainly won’t see this sort of plan coming from the very tribes they see as intrinsicly inferior, and I suspect that alone will do more damage to the Shadow Court than a hundred press-conferences from me!” Celestia has said, a peculiar gleam in her eyes after listening to the plan. “Regardless, you have my blessing, and my full support in this. Remember, there is to be no killing and you are not permitted to flee the country, but other than that, I will expend every ounce of influence I can bring to bear for anything you need to do to keep the Shadow Court off your backs, at least until we can begin Bluebone’s trial and finally deal with this cancer infesting Equestria.”

“Got me lovelies gear all packed up, Night. Think that’s all of it, but how’re we gonna get down to the gates? S’gonna be a bloody long walk, ‘specially with all these ponies hangin’ ‘round your front door.” Spud grunted, the scarred, ugly stallion thumping a massive suitcase down by the front door, his three wives all giving him dire looks as the suitcase’s latching mechanisms squeaked alarmingly, both at their treatment and at holding the two halves of the over-stuffed suitcase together.

“That’s my department. We’re going underground, courtesy of the Sewage Department, and slipping out of Canterlot without ever seeing the gates.” Thunderwing stuck a hoof in the air, laughing sassily as everypony else in the room groaned. “There’s an old segment of the sewers that runs directly under this street, and we’ve got a crew of diamond dogs digging a small tunnel up to the back-yard. Once we’re down, they’ll fill in their tunnel, patch the hole in the sewers and nopony will be the wiser.”

“Not too keen on wading through shit to get out of Canterlot.” Bronze Gong grumbled unhappily, his partner nodding vigorously.

“Nobody’s wading through anything. There’s wide ledges down there we can walk on, and we’ll be given breathing masks once we’re down there. Best of all, the Shadow Court barely has a presence down in that part of the city, given that it’s diamond dog territory, and the pack we’ll be dealing with has always been loyal to the Thrones for giving them such an expansive territory in exchange for maintaining the city’s underground sections and keeping an eye out for invaders.” The scarred Thestral explained further, grinning as some of the fussier mares complained about getting ‘stank’ in their manes and fur.

“I wish we could have somepony tell our children what is going on, but I suppose that defeats the purpose of the entire exercise.” Twilight Velvet muttered, soft enough only for Night Light and Thunderwing to hear, as the assembled ponies set about double-checking their luggage, the former soldiers easily falling back into the crisp, economical ways the army had taught them, the civilians following their lead rather messily.

“Shining is, as far as I know, safely ensconced in Canterlot Castle with Cadence and the entirety of the Royal Guard around them both. I suspect he’ll learn of what we’re doing sooner rather than later, even if he is now the leader of a foreign nation.” Night Light wrapped a hoof around Velvet’s shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze, his wife sighing and leaning into him for precious seconds before shaking him off, blinking back tears. “And Twilight has Princess Luna guarding her twenty-four-seven. Once we start making in-roads with the Apple Clan and we can start dishing some pain back onto the Shadow Council, given our little girl is best buddies with the pride of said Clan, I’ll bet my last bit that she’ll come looking for us, rather than the other way around.”

“Uh, just on the quiet, Velvet, you are leaving all your … ah, inspiration tools behind, yes? I’d prefer to not deafen the rest of the group the next time you decide to use me as a prop for your next novel. And isn’t playing that role that your husband’s job?” The scarred thestral whispered as the group waited impatiently for the appointed hour, blushing as both Velvet and Night Light grinned at her like cats who had just found the cream.

“Oh, I wouldn’t worry, my dear sweet Wingy, I won’t need them. You forget which Clan we’re visiting, and what they specialize in.” Night Light couldn’t help but snort with laughter at the way all the blood drained from Thunderwing’s face, and the adorable twitches her wings made as she fought to keep them from extending, as his ever-hungry wife fixed her best ‘I am going to wreck your ass and you will love it’ expression on the middle-aged thestral. “All those carrots, zucchinis and deliciously knobbly cobs of corn just waiting for us. I’m sure I can improvise with whatever is on hoof.”

“Can I surrender to the Shadow Court? I’d like to surrender to the Shadow Court.” Thunderwing whimpered as Velvet winked laviciously at her new ‘herdmate’. “Night Light, this is your job. Sate her already, will you?”

“I’ve been trying that for twenty-five years, Wingy, and you were trying that even before I got involved. You, of all ponies, should know that’s not physically possible.” Night Light shot back, laughing openly as Thunderwing groaned theatrically and complained to Velvet about Night Light ‘shirking’ his duties.

Soon enough the ponies left the house, pretending to have a party in the back-yard under a very large and enclosed marquee tent, waiting impatiently as the well-manicured lawn bulged and eventually split, a trio of very dirty diamond dogs emerging with canine grins on their faces, shaking the clods from their coats and shaking the hooves of every pony they could get their paws on, the veterans quickly mustering their partners down the surprisingly spacious tunnel as suitcases and duffle-bags were quickly passed down the hole, ponies and diamond dogs forming a chain of individuals moving the luggage down the line from mouth to paws to hooves until the luggage was all safely ensconced in the sewers awaiting transport.

Not bad, considering this was a rush-job. Night Light thought to himself as he inspected the hole, seeing the dirt had been compressed with such strength that it looked and felt like stone, but Princess Celestia had assured him that the diamond dogs would be able to fill in the hole in such a way that even the best excavators would never even know it had been there. Always easy to forget that, for all the advancement ponykind has made, the other races all have their own strengths that we’ll never be able to match.

“Good job, yes?” One of the younger diamond dogs asked, eager and obviously looking for praise. “Tunnel safe, dry, not leave big dent in pony’s grass!”

“Indeed, you did fantastic. What’s your name, friend?” Night Light agreed, extending a hoof and wincing as the over-eager young pup nearly shook his limb off.

“This one am Scarf, pony-friend! Scarf happy, is first tunnel Scarf dig on own, without Alpha telling what to do!” The pup all but scampered down the tunnel, and Night Light took a closer look, noting that the tunnel was large enough that even at full stretch, not a single part of anypony’s body touched the walls of ceiling, yet the tunnel had been dug only this morning.

“You did this all by yourself?” Night Light asked, his amazement obvious in his voice, and Scarf’s tail wagged so rapidly the pup nearly fell over.

“Yes! Yes, Scarf did all by himself! Pack-mates came to make sure Scarf do right, and help ponies out of territory, but Scarf dig whole tunnel all by himself!”

The other two diamond dogs gave Night Light the long-suffering look that all parents are intimately familiar with and rolled their eyes at Scarf’s antics, then turned their attention to the hole. Their paws gripped the sides of the hole and, before Night Light’s eyes, pulled the edges in like they were grabbing the edge of a sheet, grass and dirt stretching back across the entrance to seamlessly block the interior of the marquee tent.

Sweet Lady Faust’s left ass-cheek! I knew the diamond dogs had some sort of magic, but that’s … incredible. Night Light found himself trying to walk forwards while looking over his back, as the two older diamond dogs walked at the back of the line, their paws clawing and scraping at the hard-packed dirt walls, yet instead of shallow grooves and small amounts of dirt being pulled loose, the walls expanded back in like a sponge that had been dipped in water, yet never so much that the integrity of the tunnel seemed at risk, nor were the diamond dogs in danger of being buried by their own handiwork.

It only took a minute to navigate the tunnel, Night Light being urged on by the excited Scarf as his two older pack-mates handled the tunnel, and entrance to the sewers was hardly full of noxious fumes, as the Bronze Leaves had feared. I’ve smelled worse when working in the garden. Night Light thought to himself as he emerged from the tunnel, the two older diamond dogs hot on his heels as the tunnel sealed up behind them, the dirt flowing together and then stopping just behind the curved layer of thick, dark bricks that made up the walls and ceiling of the capital’s ancient sewers.

“Hey, this place ain’t so bad.” Spud rumbled, his wives strapping their suitcases to his sides and back with frustrated expressions on their faces. “Reminds me of ... hey, Night, what was that place, the ruins, the ones wit’ all the snakes an’ the bats and the donkey salt-smugglers we got sent out to nab?”

“The Autam’nal Ruins, the remains of buffalo temple dedicated to the Spirit of Fall.” Thunderwing piped up, assisting Honeydip, Spud’s wife from Prance, to secure her share of the luggage against her massive husband’s side. “And if I recall correctly, you shot me in the ass with a crossbow because you couldn’t tell the difference between a giant fruit-bat and a thestral while we were chasing some idiot pegasus tomb-robber around in there when she was trying to unearth some unholy relic.”

“Ah, t’was jus’ a flesh wound, an’ yah got to get Night Light to carry yah out a’ that place on his ba-aaack!” Spud protested, then yelped as Vet’kloe, his zebra wife, kicked him in the ankle. “Why, me love?”

“Too loud you all are, these noises will carry, and this deep under the earth a zebra should not tarry!” Vet’kloe hissed, the tall zebra looking especially pale as her eyes roamed the dim expanses of the sewer and scowled at the slow-moving river of dirty water beside them. “The sooner we are out the better I say, so move your fat arse, we haven’t got all day!”

“Vet’s got the right of it. Just because we’re unlikely to meet any resistance down here doesn’t mean there’s no risk.” Holding up a glowing crystal, Bronze Gong and another Diamond Dog stood at the head of the party, where Autumn Glory and Star Streaks were handing out simple masks of perfume-soaked cloth to the other ponies in the group. “Sooner or later somepony will catch on that we’re no longer at the Twilight residence, so the quicker we’re out of the city, the better our odds.”

“Not many ponies down here, but still some. They not listen to Princess, not listen when told they stray into pack’s territory.” The diamond dog next to Bronze Gong grumbled, an older female whose wrinkled muzzle and floppy ears had turned silver from age. “Thieves, smugglers, we try to catch them but we have no authority above ground, cannot hold them once they reach streets. Royal Guards help, but too few, and these ponies know what time patrols come past, and pack cannot be everywhere at once.”

“Worse though now. Many unicorns come into territory now, all bearing symbol of pikes with blades that twist like screws. Use bad magic on pack, make pack-mates sick, see bad visions, our pups get lost in sewers and tunnels, become afraid of own territory.” One of the older diamond dogs behind Night Light added, picking up a brick and pushing it back into place, the other dog licking another brick and placing it next to that, the brick strangely staying in place despite the angle and the lack of mortar. “We tell Royal Guards, but they not can help much. Too few, too few, and twisted-pike Unicorns move in big groups, use bad magic to make it bad luck for pack to stay in territory under northern cliffs.”

Northern cliffs … that’s the Noble District, or at least the part of the district where the oldest and most influential Houses have their mansions. Night Light shared a startled look with Thunderwing before they received their masks and distractedly put them on. Pikes with a screw-like blade … do they mean the Spiral Pikes?

The thought of an all-unicorn mercenary unit with supremacist tendencies and a history of employing black magic moving uncontested through the sewers of Canterlot was a disturbing thought, especially if the Thrones were sitting on their hooves about the matter

“And nobody is doing anything about it?” Night Light whispered to one of the diamond dogs who brought up the rear of the group as they began to walk, following the aging female at the front of their mis-matched convoy.

“Twisted-pike unicorns not come till few weeks ago, use bad magic to hide themselves, Pack not know they here until some pups stumble into them, and twisted-pikes hurt pups’ minds, trick them to get lost in their own tunnels. Pack took many days to find our pups, and Princess do much, give charms that take away bad magic, charms that hold much sun-magic to help pups heal and feel safe again. But ring-horns had to leave, capture bug-pony, not able to help us now.” The dog grunted, sniffing the air cautiously before speaking again. “Alpha says that ring-horns have come back, will deal with twisted-pike ponies, but ring-ponies must come soon. Pack not big enough to fight them alone, need pony-magic to fight pony-magic, twisted-pike ponies use bad magic, evil magic, makes pack see things that not real, makes pack get lost in own tunnels and Princess not able to make enough charms for all of pack.”

“If your Alpha can’t get any help from the Royal Guards, tell her to go see Dawn Ray of the Royal Guard, or seek out Major Nightshade of the Night Guard. Either of them will be happy to lean on ponies until you get the support you need.” Thunderwing offered, her voice slightly muffled from behind the cloth mask. “I can’t believe Rosebush let things get this bad.”

“Not her fault. Stupid ponies who not listen to pack, not obey Royal Guard, they ones who at fault. Try to tell Alpha that need ‘appointment’ when she comes with news. Alpha have to sneak into palace, talk to Rosebush, not able to see Princess anymore. Every time Alpha try to see Princess, told Princess too busy by ponies who smell too much like flowers and silk, not enough sweat and dirt. Say Princess too good to speak to pack, but Alpha and pack know this is lies, Princess always talks to pack whenever she can.” The dog growled, and Night Light patted the digger’s shoulder with a hoof.

“There’s always some fool who thinks because they don’t have to do the grunt work, they’re above everyone else, pony or otherwise. I’d go and let the Princess know myself, but we’re trying to get out of Canterlot because somepony wants to capture me and my friends, and if we stay, they might try to kill us to keep us silent.”

“Pack knows, Alpha very angry, wants to fight but if packs fights ponies, Princess have to deal with stupid ponies who not think for themselves, only believe what they told, and cause big mess on surface. So pack waits, pack watches, pack tracks twisted-pikes, try to see where they go up to surface, where they store weapons, get their scents.” The diamond dog grinned, a very toothy, predatory grin as the tunnel widened, and several more diamond dogs, these ones wearing coats of grease-blackened mail, horned helms jammed down over their heads and short, broad-headed spears clutched in thick paws stepped out of the shadows and began to escort the convoy, so silently that many of the ponies did double-takes at the sudden increase in escorts. “Twisted-pikes, thieves, stupid ponies, they all forget that pack given this territory by Princess because pack fought for Princess during bad old days, pack broke bad ponies who try to use bad magic against Princess and other ponies. Pack not forget that Princess cared for us, gave us home, healed our sick, made us equals of ponies and minotaurs and orcs in law. Pack not forget Princess loves us as own pups, nor forget how to fight.”

“When Princess say time is right, when Alpha and pack allowed to fight, ponies will remember why they not supposed to come into pack’s territory without asking.”

“If we’re back in Canterlot when that happens, my friend, I hope I’m there to help you and your pack.” Night Light whispered as a faint hint of daylight crept through the small openings in a stallion-hold cover overhead. “There’s a burning need to purge those ponies from our home before they hurt more of our people.”

“Our people. You speak of ponies and pack as one people?” The Diamond Dog asked, ears perking up and tail wagging slightly.

“We are all Equestrian, all equal in the eyes of the law. As far as I am concerned, that makes us all one people, one pack if you will, regardless of which race or tribe we belong to.” The blue stallion said firmly, holding the Diamond Dog’s gaze and smiling softly as the canine being’s tail began to wag madly.

“Is good. Alpha say that new Princess’s sire is good pony like new Princess is. Is much honor for pack that one of our pups guards new Princess, and now can tell pack that new Princess will help old Princess look after pack.”

“If one of your pack is looking after my daughter, then my heart is truly at ease.” Night Light said, and nearly fell into the river of fouled water as the Diamond Dog’s tail wagged so fast it began to slap him on the haunches.

Yet why have I never heard a single thing in any of Twilight’s letters about a Diamond Dog amongst her friends?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rarity sighed as Nurse Redheart probed her again, the sour-faced mare tutting softly as her hooves poked and prodded while her assistants, and the thestrals, prepared the materials for the next cast that Rarity would be wearing.

Thankfully, it wouldn’t be a full body cast this time, but it would be one that confined Rarity’s torso, meaning her range of movement would remain heavily constricted.

Not that having those two burly bat-ponies carrying me around is all bad. And I might actually get to feel all those muscles rippling under their coats without a full-body plaster on me this time. Rarity thought to herself, a bright point in an otherwise dark time in her life. And not the only one, strange as it seemed.

“Is she well, miss Redheart?” Moonbeam asked softly, the silver-eyed Thestral Mare leaning over the sour nurse’s shoulder, eyes watching every gesture and movement keenly. “I’m afraid my skills are more of a battlefield-nature, not proper medical care.”

“Nothing is out of place or more swollen than it should be after such an impact, and the medication and healing spells are doing their work.” Redheart muttered tartly, then very abruptly turned her head and glared over her shoulder at Moonbeam, the two mares’ faces so close together their muzzles almost touched. “And if you don’t get off my ass, both figuratively and literally, there will be two mares in plaster-casts before the day is over.”

Who would have thought that Moonbeam would be keeping me sane, be my saving grace, in this situation?

Certainly, Rarity hadn’t expected to have Princess Luna and Twilight come running when the … nightmare had struck her, not after that horrible night, nor to wake up from the dreamless, blissful state of oblivion that Luna had granted her with Moonbeam holding a replica of the Element of Generosity in her hooves over Rarity’s immobilized body.

“My mistress had to take Princess Twilight back home, both our newest Princess and Sir Spike are very distraught at what has happened to you, but Princess Luna did command me to explain to you the situation, if you are of a stable state of mind.”

“I am sane, despite what some ponies would have you believe! Despite Twilight tearing Generosity from my mind…”

“She did not! Not even Princess Luna or Elder Princess Celestia could perform such a feat. The Elements of Harmony answer to no force but themselves, and even now Princess Twilight struggles with the Element of Magic and the rogue Element of Generosity warring within her mind.” Moonbeam has said, slipping the faux Element around Rarity’s neck. “My Princess believes that Generosity has attempted to pervert it’s duties, and that conflict between your true nature and it’s attempted subversion has caused you to suffer a severe mental breakdown. Already, the Princesses have summon the Royal Psychiatrist to help you, and all of the Element Bearers, with the current troubles that plague you.”

“Wait, this is all so … you cannot expect me to believe everything is so cut and dry! I was betrayed, attacked, my friends …”

“Responded far too violently, nopony is denying this Lady Rarity, not then and not now, but consider what you would do if you learned that your little sister had been poisoned with aphrodisiacs? Or what your parents will do when they learn their youngest daughter has suffered so?” The silver-eyed mare had sighed and given Rarity a look of mingled pity and frustration that had choked Rarity’s argument in her throat. “The Princesses believe that Generosity, being unable to act openly against it’s own purpose, has been attempting to break your mind and corrupt the harmony you share with the other Bearers for some time now. Why it has done so remains a mystery, however.”

That had rocked Rarity to her core. Had she been manipulated? Corrupted by the very Element she had been so proud to bear, to be the only pony alive, including the Princesses themselves, who was worthy of what that Element represented? The thought both thrilled her, that she could blame all the bad blood that had been shed on everypony on some outside force and be absolved of all the guilt and anger, and horrified her more than even the twisted vision of being eternally fused to her Nightmare doppelganger had.

If Rarity was not in complete control of her own destiny, then had any of the changes in her life, for good or ill, mattered one bit? If every action she had taken been at the behest of some cosmic force nudging her along like a pawn on the chess-board, then she had achieved nothing, gained nothing, and everything that she had worked for and sacrificed to obtain was meaningless. And that rankled on many levels.

What point is there in my existence if I am but a single move in some sort of conflict between the Elements of Harmony? Rarity had wondered with sick horror as Moonbeam had prattled on about the features of the fake ‘Element’ charm and the news of the day. If I am not the master of my own destiny, the author of my own fate, then what is the point of living? I refuse to be some … some hapless actor, moved at the whim of some greater force!

And yet Moonbeam had refused to leave Rarity to her misery, swearing to the Pinkie Pie pledge without hesitation and acknowledging that such an oath would be binding no matter what.

Princess Celestia had an extensive file on Pinkie as well, it seemed, judging from how Moonbeam had shuddered when a faint “I heaaaaaaaaaaaard that!” reached them through the heavily-shielded windows of Rarity’s boutique.

Everything that Moonbeam knew about the Elements, about what was going on in Ponyville and Canterlot, every scrap of information Rarity could think to ask about the Princesses was laid bare without hesitation … while the ‘gossip’ Moonbeam provided certainly improved Rarity’s mood, the thought of being manipulated by her Element troubled Rarity greatly.

All the information pointed to the unhappy truth that Generosity had, if not openly manipulated Rarity, then it had poisoned her mind at times when Rarity had been vulnerable in an effort to drive the white-coated Unicorn into acts of Disharmony, acts designed to corrupt or break the Harmony the Elements were supposed to represent. And worst of all, I never even realized I was being manipulated. I felt guilt, yes, when I was with Fancy Pants rather than seeing to my friends’ goals in Canterlot, but I had always wanted to join the Nobility … but it was so odd, so strange of me to completely ignore the girls like that. I even put up with their Faust-be-damned awful outfits and made them to the best of my ability without complaint, at least at first, because of how much they mean to me, and I to them.

And why was I so outraged at my friends? Yes, they were being monumentally unfair, it was the Cakes’ fault that the order was so botched, with aphrodisiacs instead of sugar and guarana, but I … I was out of control, and I am never out of control. They offered me a clear way to settle the matter without soiling anyone’s name in the courts, a mere slap on the hoof compared to what the law would dole out for even my minor role in the disaster, and instead I self-destructed right in-front of them all like a petulant child that’s never been told no before. Sweetie Belle and her friends had more control than that, even with all those hormones running through their systems, yet I ….

The fake Element around her neck glimmered softly, a pulse of alien but comforting magical warmth spreading from the charm into the skin directly underneath and then throughout the rest of her as the magical charm detected her rising stress-levels. Rarity sighed and tried to relax, stilling her mind as much as she could as the charm in the gem began to do its work once again, soothing her mind and calming her panic as Redheart and Moonbeam argued over Rarity’s next step on the path to good health.

So much has gone wrong, but at least Twilight cares, or at least feels guilty enough to come see me. The other girls have not come to visit yet, though … is it because Princess Luna ordered me isolated, or is it that they no longer care? No, I must believe that our friendship is not so fragile that one fight, even such a vicious one, can break us apart.

That visit, even if Rarity had been unconscious for most of it, gave her hope that at least the disaster that had befallen her had not cost Rarity all of her friends, even if things seemed strained at the moment. She would apologise for her role in the accident, they would apologise in turn for being so cruel, and then they could try to salvage their friendships with one another. The alternative was too painful to think about.

“Nurse Redheart, if I may, my sister … is she well? And the other Crusaders?” Rarity asked softly as a cowed-looking Moonbeam sulked away, and the two burly Thestral guards were quickly shooed out of the room by the sour nurse before she answered.

“I’ve only had a quick talk with them, but it seems that they’ve already been taught a very strong contraceptive spell, and how to brew a powerful abortive tea, by the blue unicorn that brought the Ursa Minor to town that one time.” Redheart said softly enough that Rarity doubted the two trainee nurses could hear, the nurse leaning down to inspect Rarity’s face and teeth with a keen, and critical, eye before speaking again. “I’d give them another day, maybe two days at most, before their systems work through the aphrodisiacs, but I have no idea how the spell Sweetie used to alter their bodies into their … current state … will affect either their odds of getting each other pregnant.”

Rarity turned more than a little green at the thought of Sweetie, waddling home with a fat belly and a blank flank. Forget my having to leave town in disgrace, Sweetie would be ruined if that happened! She’s barely even begun to consider what life has to offer as an adult, and to become a mother straight out of her own foalhood? So many doors that could open before her would remain closed simply because of …

“Can we not simply separate the Crusaders from each other? Keep them physically apart and prevent them from … from doing what horny teenagers do?”

“I’d rather the Crusaders keep each other occupied, rather than have to deal with some stallion or mare who walks past them, gets a whiff of their pheromones and decides to use that as a legally water-tight excuse to sample some unriped fruit … or the Crusaders start trying to hump anything that doesn’t move after the count of three because their brains are fried and full of hormones.” The nurse pointed out, glaring down at Rarity, although the fashionista wasn’t sure if that was because she still blamed Rarity for her minor role in the debacle, or it was just Redheart’s natural state of perpetual irritation at the world in general on display. “You might be belatedly worried about your sister’s health and well-being, but I have the health and safety of the entire town to consider, and keeping that trio contained and separated from other teenagers, or predatory adults, is the best solution for the majority of the townsfolk. Something you might want to think about next time, Rarity.”

“I only intended to prank Applejack by making the Crusaders so hyperactive that nopony at the Apple household would get any sleep!” Rarity protested, then grunted as Redheart’s hoof pressed far harder on her bruised middle than any palpitation required.

“And you didn’t consider that maybe Granny Smith might have had a heart attack from all that sugar? Or that you might have caused anypony eating that much sugar and stimulants to suffer catastrophic renal failure? Or that much guarana might have caused delirium, maybe that Applejack might stubbornly try to work the fields the next day, hang her symptoms, and we have another incident knocking most of the adult ponies in town for a loop? I don’t want to be the pony having to deal with half the population suffering from explosive diarrhea again, literally explosive diarrhea, because that stubborn ass of a mare tries to keep working when most ponies would be sensible enough to throw in the towel.” The nurse snarled, tapping Rarity on the muzzle with her hoof as she removed the other from Rarity’s bruised torso. “Find less potentially lethal ways to prank your friends, Miss Rarity, or so help me you’ll wish Rainbow Dash had finished the job by the time I get through with you!”

“I thought you had sworn the Hippocratic oath!”

“Doctors swear that oath, not nurses. Something I hope you and the Cakes will remember before you ever pull a stunt like this again.” The sour nurse glared down at Rarity, and the fashionista squirmed a little under that gaze. “If the Princesses hadn’t used their authority to handle the matter quietly and taken the Crusaders under their wings, literally, I would have dragged all three of you to Officer Rulebook as soon as I knew what happened, and if I had needed to break and then reset some bones in the process, so be it.”

“Can Moonbeam come back? I’d like Moonbeam to come back, please.” Rarity squeaked as Rosebush dropped her head down until the fashionista could feel the hot air coming out of the other mare’s mouth on her face.

“Oh no.” Redheart’s face split into a smile more at home on a shark than a pony as she grinned down at her prone patient. “Your second and final cast is going to be a sticky cast, dear patient, and I need to shave you bald before I start to build up the layers, otherwise we’ll tear your skin off when we’re trying to remove this final cast. I’ll only accept trained professionals helping me with a patient this important.”

“Don’t worry, miss.” One of the assistants, clearly oblivious to her superior’s wicked agenda, called out cheerily to Rarity. “Your fur will grow back in a few days after we cut the plaster off.”

“My fur? Bald?” Rarity’s voice came out as a high-pitched whimper, while Redheart’s grin grew to disturbingly Pinkie-like levels.

“Who knows, maybe you’ll start a new fashion trend! Now girls, hold her down while I get the razors sharpened and the strips for the plaster ready. We want this patient to be nice and smooth so the plaster won’t hurt when we cut it off in a few days time.” Redheart chortled evilly as Rarity began to hyperventilate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Don’t you think we should be in there? I mean, Princess Luna specifically charged us with protecting Lady Rarity from anything and everything, be it herself or anypony else.” One of the burly Thestrals muttered as the voices on the other side began to climb higher in scale, even if the thickness of the walls and door prevented the words from being clearly made out.

“They are nurses, I’m sure they won’t do anything to hurt …” Moonbeam sighed, before the air was rent by a horrified screech, and swiftly followed by the sound of Redheart’s yelling.

“DAMN IT, RARITY! LIKE YOU’RE NOT USED TO SHAVING DOWN THERE?!”

The thestrals looked at each other, wide-eyed and mouths left flapping open as the shrieking and whining grew obnoxiously loud, and Redheart’s commentary in turn became angrier and more descriptive of the actions being taken in the next room, before the two guards turned their backs to the door, gripped their spears tighter and tried to assume the expressionless masks all Guards were trained to adopt while on duty with mixed success. Moonbeam just blushed, then blanched and covered her face with a leathery wing.

“I’ll go get some icecream and an ice-pack for when they’re done.” The thestral mare grunted, scowling as the two guards struggled not to burst into laughter as Redheart’s commentary and Rarity’s furious retorts grew even coarser.

Chapter 65

Chapter 65

It took something considerably odd to take Braeburn’s focus off of Little Strongheart on the rare occasions they could wander Appleloosa’s market together without her intensely over-protective father looming over them like a fretting mountain, or the small faction of stubborn, bitterly xenophobic Appleloosans complaining about a non-pony ‘monopolizing’ Braeburn’s time, but seeing a cluster of the reclusive Orchid family in town, along with their shy matriarch, was certainly enough for the buffalo and pony to snap out of their own little world.

“Elder Blossom?” Strongheart had called out, trotting over to the ancient, graceful mare with an equally-puzzled Braeburn right on her heels.

Blossom rarely leaves the quarry anymore, too old to make the trip into the town at her age I guess. And … kind of thought she wouldn’t want to be too far from her husband’s grave, given how her kin says she spends most of her days tending to it.

“Ah, little one!” The ancient mare, her olive coat and golden mane and tail heavily faded from decades under the sun and threaded with snowy-white from her age, turned to face the couple, pushing her large half-moon glasses back up her muzzle as her kin, a collection of quiet, stoic ponies of various stocks parted to allow their matriarch to greet Strongheart and Braeburn. “And your beau too! Well met, Braeburn, I trust you’re treating Strongheart well?”

Struggling with the sudden coughing-fit that the old mare had induced by so bluntly, and openly, referring to his clandestine relationship with the young buffalo, Braeburn nodded mutely, flushing slightly as Strongheart giggled and coloured as well, while the Orchids around them just smiled softly and gave light chuckles of their own.

This is why I wish they’d spend more time in Appleloosa. The Orchids don’t give a damn about race or tribe. There’s a good smattering of unicorns and pegasi amongst them, something our town desperately needs, despite what some folk say about it being an earth-pony town.

“As well as Appleloosan hospitality will allow … which I’m hoping to improve as time goes by. Speaking of which, what brings you into town, Granny Blossom? I had heard some … troubling things when Licorice Root came into town last.”

“I’m not dead yet, dear boy, even if I do feel like a husk these days.” The ancient mare barked with laughter, while the smiles fell off her kin, their expressions turning to shock and alarm, silently turning their heads to their matriarch, whom ignored their pleading, concerned faces. “No, sadly I’ve got to go to Canterlot, a sibling of mine has got herself and her kin into a spot of bother with the Thrones, and my kin and I need to go sort it out.”

“Beggin’ your pardon, but wouldn’t it be best to send your Licorice Root as your representative, or another member of the family, rather than go yourself? It’s a heck of a ride to Canterlot and the tracks ain’t the smoothest this far out. You’ll be bounced around in your seat like potatoes in a sack …”

“Braeburn, I’ve brought two-score foals into the world with nary a mid-wife to be seen and helped my poor departed Shale turn a canyon in the ass-crack of no-where into one of the most successful quarries in Eqeustria. I am not going to be done in by some train-tracks an’ lousy seats.” The old mare give him a stern look, and a warm smile that took the heat out of said look, as the Orchids began to move towards the train station, and Braenburn and Strongheart followed, as much to continue to enjoy the interaction with beings who didn’t disapprove of their relationship as to be polite. “Besides, my idiot sister won’t listen to anyone but one of her siblings, so just sending my kin to deal with her would be a waste of everypony’s time and bits.”

“She sounds … stubborn.” Strongheart said, holding her head high as their group passed the Salt Block, where a handful of ponies in cowboy hats two sized too large for them scowled at her, nursing tankards of hard apple cider in the middle of the day while the majority of the townsponies were hard at work tending to the orchards and their businesses.

“My idjit sister is so stubborn she could teach a mountain a thing or two about not budgin’ an inch, but she pulled all of our sisters out of a bad place when the rest of our family had turned on us, and took on all the heartache for herself when the hard choices had to be made. Too prideful by half and too quick to dismiss opinions she don’t like, but if’n your kin, she’ll move heaven and earth for you.” Blossom sighed, the mare’s joints popping audibly as she walked, yet her pace continued to match those of the much younger ponies around her with ease. “But since I’m the only sibling she has in Equestria right now, I’ve got to go and drag her out of this hole she’s dug before all of our family ends up in there with her.”

As Strongheart made small-talk with Blossom and the rest of her kin, Braeburn kept silent, his eyes flicking from the reclusive Orchid family to Strongheart, and then the townsponies who stopped to wave at the unlikely group, or whisper to each other as they passed the group by.

Damn, was kinda hoping that Bitter Hops wouldn’t be comin’ into town today, don’t want to be hearin’ none ‘bout his cider mill havin’ to be moved off the stampedin’ grounds again … oh Faust, why did Buckleberry an’ Silvervine both have to decide to open up their stalls directly opposite each other, the last time those two were able to see eye to eye was back when their bracers got locked together as kids! Everywhere he looked, more potential problems kept springing up, and for every pony who called out a friendly greeting to Strongheart, there was another who scowled or walked over to the other side of the street. You’d think we’d be over this by now! I’m gonna have to call a town meeting and chew some folks out, maybe even lean on cousin Applejack to see if we can get some Royal Guards to be stationed in Appleloosa since Sheriff Silverstar is apparently as useful as a wet paper bag when it comes to dealing with his own kith and kin. Definitely have to make a big fuss about the bar owner, Malted Milk, and how he’s encouraging the kind of ponies who don’t want to honor our agreement with the buffalo tribes to spend all day drinkin’ in his establishment. Half of those ponies are supposed to be workin’ in the orchards and the fields, and the other half don’t have the bits to spend drinkin’ all day, so Malted Milk has gotta be lettin’ them drink up a tab, and with how often I see them all in there, how big of a tab have they all run up, and how are they gonna pay it all back?

“Braeburn?” The gold-coated stallion yelped as Strongheart poked him in the side. “We lost you there for a few minutes, and Elder Blossom was talking about who’d be running the quarry while she was absent …”

“Beggin’ your pardon, Granny Blossom, I didn’t mean no offence, it's just I’ve been thinkin’ ‘bout some of the townsponies an’ how they’re not really livin’ up to the Apple family’s standards. Ain’t bein’ neighbourly to their neighbours, stuff like that.” Braeburn sighed gustily and gave a guilty smile to Strongheart. “Maybe thinkin’ that I might have to take a trip to Canterlot myself to suggest a new sheriff, maybe some actual Royal Guards in town, some Pegasi and Unicorns, jus’ to make a point to some of my kin.”

“You do that, young one, an’ you make damn sure it’s got the Princesses’ hoof-prints all over it. My family, an’ the buffaloes, have been gettin’ the short end of the stick for far too long. Maybe get some of the matriarchs of the Apple Clan out here and put the hoof in good and proper.” Granny Blossom said, a wiked grin spreading across her ancient, lined face. “Too many ponies came out to Appleloosa who seemed to think bein’ on the outskirts of Equestria means they don’t have to listen to the laws involvin’ the other races and tribes. Might do more good than you think, to force ‘em to remember that livin’ in Equestria means livin’ under the Princesses’s rules.”

That made Braeburn imagine, with a guilty warmth in his chest, sending off all the ponies determined to monopolize and ruin his life to some distant, dreary corner of the continent and out of his life forever, to get rid of all the nay-sayers that kept on making a fuss about him courting Little Strongheart, amongst other things, and then being able to ensure that his beloved Appleloosa was filled to bursting with his sweetheart’s tribe, and pegasi and unicorns to manage the weather and the magic needed for a frontier town to truly thrive.

“Tell you what, since you’ve got so much on your hooves, why don’t you write a letter an’ I’ll deliver it by hoof in Canterlot.” Granny Blossom chuckled, seeing the dreamy, far-away look in Braeburn’s eyes. “Since I’ve got to go before the Thrones anyways, hoof-delivering a letter to somepony important ‘bout a frontier town needing some guards to remind Ponies they need to play nice with the other races should be easy to do.”

“I’d appreciate that, Granny Blossom.”

“Oh trust me, young stallion, by the time I’ve pled my case before the thrones, you can bet your last bit that Appleloosa will be crawling with Royal Guards, you mark my words.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rainbow wasn’t entirely certain when the ‘let’s get too drunk to give a damn’ party turned into ‘let’s all hug it out’ party, but waking up in the late afternoon in the warm straw of Applejack’s barn with four attractive mares piled on or around her and making those ‘too cute to call snoring’ noises was certainly not a bad way to end the day.

Of course, I can’t tell if the warm fuzzies are the after-effects of the aphrodisiacs, or its just been a while since somebody held me without us screwing each other’s brains out first. The rainbow-maned pegasus sighed happily and leaned back into Applejack’s chest, savouring the warm, solid pony’s weight behind her, snickering softly as Pinkie, apparently missing a similar contact from her, wiggled through the straw until she had her head resting on Rainbow’s stomach, and then Fluttershy …

“Tell. Me. Everything.”

Yeah, okay, going to need to process that later. Who knew the phrase ‘beware the quiet ones’ could be used to describe Fluttershy. Never thought I would be on the receiving end of a full-powered Stare simply because I … not thinking about Big Mac’s equipment, nope, not happening, nooooooooooooooooooooooooo stop it, subconscious me, you bastard.

Somehow, much to Rainbow’s surprise, Zecora, Spitfire and Big Mac had gotten involved somehow, with the Zebra sprawled across Big Mac’s sleeping frame in a way that made Rainbow wonder if she was going to watch a battle to the death if and when Fluttershy woke up and saw them like that, and Spitfire was, of all things, asleep with the upper half of her body buried in a pile of loose hay with her ass up in the air for all to see on the far side of the barn. Her naked ass. With shreds of her wonderbolt uniform still vainly clinging to that magnificent ass.

Oooookay. Definitely did not just check out my commanding officer’s bootay, taunt, lean and deliciously mean as it looks. Last thing I need to is to get distracted by thinking about how fun it would be to wreck that ass when we’re doing a routine in the future.

A flash of dark blue above her caused Rainbow to lift her head in alarm, but it was only Soarin, smirking down at her with his dark blue tail dangling down from one of the rafters, the co-captain of the Wonderbolts apparently stone-cold sober and acting as some sort of lookout-slash-bodyguard for the whole pile of sleeping ponies.

“How’s your head, rookie?” He asked, his smirk turning into a full-blown grin as Rainbow blushed and tried to hide under one of her own wings. “Didn’t realize that the big red lug there had a harem.”

“I’m not hung-over, but I am kinda … stuck.” Rainbow scowled, trying to wriggle away and only encouraging the sleeping snuggle-fiend known as Pinkie to crawl even higher up Rainbow’s body till her head was nestled right under Rainbow’s chin.

“Yeah, I saw what happened to Spitfire, so I’m gonna hang up here till you all wake up.”

“Do I even wanna know?”

“The boss tried to pull the pink monster off you to take you back home, since you didn’t give her a key to your pad yet, then ended up getting snuggled into oblivion in the hay-pile over there, after that your new blanket there sleep-walked back over to the pile and made herself comfortable.”

“And you didn’t help?”

“Rookie, I have my eye on a specific mare, and despite the locker-room bullshitting, it’s not my thing to go chasing under every tail that lifts when I walk into the room. I really don’t want to have said mare think I’m some kind of easy mark that goes after any landing pad, no matter how delightfully squishy it looks, just because it’s there.” Soarin gave Rainbow a very sour look. “And I saw what Pinkie Pie did to the boss. A sleep-walking earth pony civilian. To one of the best Wonderbolts in living memory and a Royal Agent to boot. I would like to leave my dignity, my wonderbolt suit, and my junk intact, please and thank you.”

“I was wondering why she was naked after making such a fuss about staying in uniform. Uh … how did Pinkie strip Spitfire …”

“With. Her. Teeth.”

“… I am kinda pissed I was asleep while that happened.”

“Ugh, I just hope the other Royal Agents aren’t having this much of a problem with their jobs.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna hugged Twilight closer to her, her heart breaking as she heard Twilight’s sniffle and the feeling of the other alicorn huddling up against Luna like a frightened child.

The disaster with the Spa Twins, the debacle with that cake and her friend, Rarity, the Element of Generosity turning rogue and attempting to possess her, if that even is what it is attempting to do, our Sympathy causing no end of disasters and stress and now my Faust-damned niece acting like a deranged, deluded teenager rather than …

“I’m … okay, Luna.” The words came out, barely audible, from the pony to whom Luna owed so much, within the cocoon of feathers and flowing mane that Luna had used to ward her marefriend from the rest of the world.

“And the moon is made of cheese. You’ve had enough insanity to deal with today, we both have, so once we’re done here, and assuming Cadence hasn’t found a way out of the daydream I put her in, we’re going to have the Crystal Guards stash my idiot niece and your thick-headed brother somewhere secure in Ponyville, and then you and I are holing up in your bedroom for the next decade, or until the rest of the country grows the buck up.”

“I just … I can’t handle this, Luna! It was all too much, all at once, I just … I need time, and nopony will give me any. They all scream at me for answers, or blame me for things beyond my control, or just want something from me!”

Luna sighed heavily and tightened her grip, hoping that Twilight could take strength from being held, at the very least.

“I have felt the same pressure and I understand how frustrating it is to have random strangers just start throwing demands at you like it is their right to make you handle their problems for them, my poor Twilight, but back when I Ascended there was only the colony I had been born to that I had to deal with in the first few months of my new life, and then only a hoof-ful of scattered thestral settlements once word spread of my control over the Moon and the night sky. Back then, news travelled only as fast as a thestral could fly and most of the settlements were several weeks apart to avoid colonies clashing over hunting territories.” The Alicorn of the Night felt her mind drift back to her own Ascension … and how the Sun-Goddess her people worshipped as a vengeful punisher of the wicked had proven to be a heart-broken, lonely mare mourning those whom had been dead for centuries, who had taken in a ‘freakish’ filly, first as a friend, then a student, and finally a sister … “Perhaps it would make sense for us to just flee to some deserted island for your Ascension and tell the rest of the world to go buck itself until you’re a complete immortal?”

“I can’t run away, that would … I need to face this and learn how to survive these trials, or I’ll be running for the rest of my life. I just wish I knew how you, Celestia and Cadence handle all this pressure, all of those demented ponies who think screaming at me at the top of their lungs for what they want solves anything.”

“We delegate.” Luna had to resist the urge to giggle as, after several seconds of silence, Twilight’s scrunched-up face popped out of the cocoon Luna had made for her marefriend out of the larger alicorn’s wings and ever-flowing tail and gave Luna the most adorably angry ‘I-don’t-believe-you’ expression the Lunar Princess had ever seen.

“Explain.” The smaller Alicorn grunted, settling herself into a more comfortable position, leaning her side against Luna’s chest. “That sounds too simple to actually work in Canterlot.”

“Actually, it’s self-sustaining once it reaches a certain point of social momentum. My sister is better at getting ponies to do what she wants without actually telling them to do so than anybeing I’ve ever met … do not scowl at me, we will take my sister to task over her antics towards you and the other Bearers when we see her next, but I have already told you she had always had her eyes on you, no matter the task the Bearers were sent on.” Luna booped Twilight’s muzzle when she noticed her marefriend’s expression turning sour, and earned a flustered spluttering in response to the action. “Ahem, where was I? Oh, yes, she has a stable of Public Relations ponies who work tirelessly to defend her name and inform our ponies about the truth of her goals and intentions, and the actions of her detractors, and she has departments for almost every facet of her public life. Obviously, back in the day this used to be just a score of ponies in every town that handled such things and put the brakes on attempts at coups and rabble-rousers, but with the fact we have millions of citizens in Equestria now, and every nation on the planet keeps a close tab on my sister and I because of our control over the two largest celestial bodies in the sky, my sister claims she had to drastically increase the size of the staff involved just to keep up a few centuries ago, and the as the ability to spread information faster and in larger areas became more available to the common ponies and other races, my sister had to expand exponentially just to keep up.”

“So you suggest I throw some poor, trusting sap out to that pack of wolves camped on my doorstep to field all their questions, and pray my hapless sacrificial offering doesn’t do or say something that will leave me socially crucified in the aftermath?”

“To be honest, Twilight, you could say and do nothing and the paparazzi will still crucify you, it is what they do, but a Public Relations assistant could do wonders for helping you handle the more … volatile scumbags chasing you for a story to spin. Now that I think about it, your own Royal Guards would be appropriate too …”

“I am not going to force a pony to go trudging after me in plate-armor all day every day. Besides, I’m not anypony special …”

Twilight’s voice trailed off into a petulant whine when she spotted Luna’s smirk.

“Okay, fine, I’m a Princess now, I get it, but I don’t believe I deserve special attention. And besides, what would they even be, training-wise, to keep up with me? Battle-Mages? Spell-Swords? We’ve precious few Royal Guards who are trained both in defence and the higher levels of the magical arts to being with, and I can’t even imagine having that much control over somepony’s life that they have to stand guard over me all day long?” Twilight huffed and wriggled against Luna, her own, smaller wings sneaking out to hold Luna’s barrel against her own. “I’ve seen how Royal Guards are supposed to act, and I just … can’t. I’d try to make friends with them, and they’d either get mad at me for not acting like a Princess, or I would befriend them, and then they’d lose their jobs for not acting with ‘proper decorum’ around a Princess.”

“That would be an issue, but I doubt they would be discharged from the military simply for being close to their Princess. Many of my Thestral refer to me without title when we are in private, and I know many of the Royal Guard consider protecting Celestia a singular, and fiercely sought-after, honor, rather than a duty. I believe their pet name for her is ‘Mom-lestia’?”

“Ugh, don’t remind me, Shining went through that phase shortly before he and Cadence started dating … speaking of which, are you sure we should just leave them down in the library while I … decompress? Shining is a bit of a block-head, but he’s a determined blockhead. And Faust help us all if Cadence comes to and finds us like this, she needed to be hit with my freezing spell just to get her to calm down enough to speak coherently after we admitted to … to being intimate with each other.”

Luna chuckled and settled for brushing Twilight’s frazzled mane into a semblance of normality with her magic, Luna’s dusky blue aura forming a crude comb to accomplish this. “Cadence is unlikely to wake up for at least another hour, seeing as she’s currently trapped in a very pleasant day-dream involving your brother, a mountain whipped cream and what I believe to be some sort of chocolate-flavoured body-paint?”

The Lunar Princess couldn’t help but giggle as Twilight made exaggerated gagging noises as she obviously envisioned that particular scenario.

“And I am very sorry, but if your brother comes in here and starts waving his big-brother status around as an excuse to dictate whom you can be with, I say we tag-team him and start shaving his mane off until he agrees to stop being such a control freak.”

“We’re not going to shave his mane, he’s a soldier, he went through boot-camp and that won’t phase him. Instead if he tries to be an ass about us dating, we’ll enchant his mane to have bouncing, magnificent curls all through it, and we’ll dye him the same colours as Cadence.”

“Uh, considering what I saw in his subconscious the one time I entered his Dreamscape, that might actually make him happy, and Cadence … how does this affect Cadence?”

“My Sister-in-Law is super sensitive about the fact her mane and tail don’t flow like Celestia’s … she spent a lot of time when she was foal-sitting me pouring over magical tomes trying to figure out a way to get the effect artificially, but she could never find a spell that worked quite right.” Twilight giggled and put a hoof to her mouth to muffle the noise, shooting a guilty look towards the door. “She tried animating her hair, and it just ended up curling around anything that got within range to the point she looked like the Katamari-Pony, and trying to conjure a small, personal wind to make her mane and tail always ‘flowing’ worked to an extent … until somepony walked anywhere within five or six body-lengths behind her, where they’d get a face-full of whatever perfume she was wearing, or anything other smells she might be, ah, producing. Needless to say, this kind of gave the Ponies around her a bad impression …”

“Cadence, Princess of Farts.” Trying to not laugh and only partially succeeding, Luna loosened her grip on Twilight to avoid squashing her marefriend as the Lunar Princess descended into manic giggling.

It was good to laugh, to just be two friends without the pressure of their crowns on their heads or the demands of family and duty hanging around their necks, but it still felt far too soon when the door was knocked on, and Spike’s head peered in, a soft smile on his face as he caught sight of the two Princesses.

“Hey guys, just letting you know that Shining is waking up … and he’s still clueless.” The young drake whispered, giving the two Alicorns a thumbs-up. “Should I try to get them to leave?”

“No. I’ll tell my brother that Luna and I are in a … that we’re dating, as he put it, and then we give my brother and sister-in-law the heave-ho out the door.” Twilight said loudly after a few moments of thought. “I owe him the truth, at least, and if he can’t accept this is going to happen … then I don’t want him under my roof.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nursing a sore head and a nagging concern for his wife, who had apparently passed out on Twilight’s couch with the dopiest expression he’d ever seen and two fully extended wings, Shining stomped up the stairs with Spike behind him, wielding a pan in each claw and having made a threat to use them against Shining’s headache if his ‘big brother’ so much as made one wrong move.

“Twilight, Luna, it’s me.” Shining said loudly, knocking a hoof on the bedroom door and grimacing as Spike raised the two pans high over his frilled head. Just the threat of the clamour was enough to make Shining’s already-abused head throb painfully.

“Come in, brother. I’ve … we’ve got something to tell you.”

“Glad to hear it.” Shining muttered, pushing the door open with a hoof, rather than his magic. Any spellcasting, even telekinesis, would probably cause a raging migraine at best, with the concussion he was nursing right now. “Okay, so … is my wife okay, first of all?”

“Princess Cadence is currently trapped, and I use the term loosely, in a daydream I forced on her. Otherwise she may have done even more damage to your sister.” Luna, with one wing and her luminous, ever-flowing tail wrapped protectively around Twilight, said in the firmest ‘court’ voice that Shining had ever heard her use without the Canterlot Voice behind it. “She should wake within an hour or so, but if she attempts to harass either myself or Twilight again, but please be certain to warn her the next daydream I send her to will be a significantly less pleasant experience.”

“How can a daydream be unpleasant?” The Royal Consort muttered to himself, but nodded firmly. “And, ah, the thing you have to tell me? There’s several ‘things’ I’d like cleared up, to be perfectly honest, but let’s deal with the biggest elephant in the room first.”

“The first … and most important matter is that I am dating another Mare, and that isn’t going to change anytime soon. Can you handle that, Shining?” Twilight spoke up this time, leaning heavily against Luna and with an expression of such weariness and despair on her face that Shining’s heart threatened to stop on the spot.

She looks more beat-up than she did even after dealing with the Changeling invasion of Canterlot … her Ascension has been so rough, because of her fame before becoming an Alicorn and how sheltered she’s been from the worst of Canterlot’s intrigues.

“I’ve no problem with you dating somepony of the same gender, Twilie. Flames of Tartarus, you could date a Diamond Dog or a Gryphon or an Orc, just so long as the two of you are happy together, that’s my only concern, and the rest of the world can go jump if they have a problem with it.” The white unicorn said sternly, giving his sister a searching look, hoping that it wasn’t just his and Cadence’s surprise visit that was causing his beloved little sister such distress. “I am more concerned about what we’re going to tell mom than the name or species of whoever this mysterious marefriend is. Unless you know some sort of spell for the creation of a plethora of magical lesbian spawn to sate Velvet’s need to spoil some grandfoals, we’re going to be stuck relying on Cadence and myself to produce them for her, and you know how much our mother wants grandfoals, and how difficult it is for Alicorns to conceive with Mortals.”

“My sister as well, Shining Armor, is somewhat mad for the all-important grandfoals. I suspect you have already come under some … pressure … from Celestia on the subject by now.”

“Does a crate of stamina potions, fertility pills and some rather unique novelty … candies count?” Shining asked archly, rewarded with snickers from Luna and Spike, and gagging noises from his sister. “Ah, word to the wise to my sister, if Celestia sends you the stamina potions with instructions on how to use them, use half the amount she suggests. Neither Cadence or I could walk straight for a few days after we used the first vial.”

“AUUUUUUUGH! Lalalalalaaaaaah, I did not need to know that!” Twilight yelled, levitating a pillow and first whacking a now openly-laughing Luna with it, then throwing it half-heartedly at Shining, who ducked and grinned as Spike took a frilly, over-stuffed pillow to the face.

“Okay, now that we’ve had some fun at Twilie’s expense … the second thing I’d like to know: Luna, is Twilight’s marefriend suitably, well, cleared for dating the newest addition to Equestria’s Royal Family? That’s … a considerable amount of pressure to be facing, let alone the security issues and the political angles, and the media is going into a damn frenzy of negative spin-doctoring that makes the aftermath of your return to Equestria look like a foal’s prank in comparison.” Ignoring the way Spike was now whacking him in the backside with the pillow in revenge for Shining dodging it in the first place, the white-coated Unicorn gave Luna a searching look as, curiously, the Elder Princess burst into high-pitching giggling.

“I assure you, Twilight’s marefriend is most certainly unfazed by royal titles and is well acquainted with the idiocy of Canterlot’s media circus.”

“Well that is a relief. The last thing you need, Twilight, is to get dumped publicly because she can’t handle the pressure of a highly public relationship. Cadence and I ended up going to counselling together to come to grips with trying to be together with Cadence’s fame as a Princess causing us no end of grief. We had to deal with her fans showing up on our dates, often with prompt-cards so I could give her the ‘perfect’ date, let alone her stalkers … and later on, my stalkers.”

Twilight scowled, first at Luna, then Shining, before speaking in that very calm and proper voice that made his hair stand on end, that tone that promised a slow, torturous lecture later on.

“Yes, my marefriend, who is going to get it later on for all the fun she’s having at my expense today, knows how to deal with the media, and I doubt there’s much they can do to shake us apart. That said … are you really not getting the signals here, brother?”

“I am kind of concerned she’s not with you right now, but I understand that as much as you might want to be together all the time, some breathing space is always necessary in a relationship.”

Twilight gave a loud, angry grunt entirely unbefitting a Princess and began slamming her muzzle into the mattress over and over again, while Luna simply smiled beneficently at Shining.

“Shining, may I call you Shining? At this point, I am not sure if I should be in awe, or insulted.” The Lunar Princess said, the humor in her voice taking the sting out of her words as her mane crept around and pulled Twilight’s head away from the mattress, turning Twilight’s face towards Luna. “Perhaps I should show you instead?”

“Show me wha-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, okay, I get it now.” Shining began, puzzled, when Luna’s head dipped down and planted a rather chaste kiss on his sister’s lips, Twilight’s frustrated expression turning into one of alarm, and then his adorkable little sister was melting against the larger alicorn, the soft press of lips slowly pulling apart as both Alicorns flushed brilliant scarlet.

Shining looked at Luna, then Twilight, then over his shoulder at the faux-gagging Spike behind him.

“You could have just told me that my sister was dating Luna. I would have been perfectly fine with just that little bit of information and we could have avoided my dear wife going into a deranged shipping frenzy and possibly molesting Twilight’s live-in maid in the process.” The unicorn said darkly, giving his youngest sibling a foul look.

“T-to be fair, Shining Armor, neither Twilight nor I are … entirely certain there is a definition for what we are right now. We choose to be together, but we are still very much interested in stallions, we are simply pursuing a romantic relationship with one another due to, uh, a unique situation.”

“Okay, brother, this might take some explaining …” Twilight stammered as Shining gave both alicorns a hard stare. “Uh, this all started back when Celestia had had to go to the Everfree Forest to deal with an explosion of hydra spawn, and Luna was trying to teach me the basics of Dream-Walking …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dappled Light took one look at the whispered argument between the wounded Changeling Queen and the massive, implacable Candy Apple and decided that discretion was the better part of valour, swifly hustling Scout, the other changeling who looked like her chitin was covered in bright green spiderweb-like cracks and the three odd foals out of the room.

Whatever punishment that had been decided on due to Changeling Queen’s part in Captain Rosebush’s rampage, which was the current favourite gossip-topic amongst the Royal Guards, had apparently left the crippled Queen in a fouler mood than normal, and Candy Apple was being entirely unsympathetic about the whole affair, which was simply pouring oil over a sea of napalm as far as Dappled was concerned.

At least the foals have stopped trying to use my ears as a teething toy. The unlucky Border Guard thought to himself wryly as the odd little group took refuge in a nearby room, several Changelings, including a very burly looking individual whom identified herself as ‘Guard Prime’, bringing over blankets and pillows to make a strange sort of nest for the foals to play in.

Yet the strangest thing of all was not the increasingly volatile temper of the Changeling Queen, the oddly friendly attitude of the Changelings towards himself or the frankly creepy buddy-buddy routine of the Royal Guards and the Magi towards a mere Border Guard like himself. No, it was how clingy that Scout had become. Dappled was beginning to wonder if he was in some kind of danger, given how Scout was almost always in close contact with him ever since Dappled had returned to his new ‘post’ as Queen Chrysalis’s personal gopher-pony.

When they were walking down the castle’s corridors, Scout was so firmly pressed to his side that Dappled thought they might trip on each other’s hooves. When they went to get food for the Kattians or change their litter-boxes, Scout was never further than a foot or so from his side. When he went to the bathroom …

Behave. Dappled told a part of himself that tried to point out that having Scout squeezing into the stall with him opened up a whole slew of potential scenarios, most of which could be rather fun, all things considered.

Even now, as Dappled tried to keep one of the two twin black foals entertained with a thread-bare teddybear, he was painfully aware of how warm and soft Scout was, pressed up against his side to the point the Border Guard was honestly surprised that the rest of the Changelings weren’t ganging up on him about his intentions towards their companion.

Maybe Changelings don’t have the same sort of social hang-ups that Ponies do. Maybe this is just what they’re like … is Scout feeding off me? I’m sure the blood-pact prevents them from feeding on Ponies without express consent. Or maybe she’s just scared that the other Ponies are going to turn on the Hive, and she’s just trying to stay close to the one Pony she trusts?

That last thought made Dappled feel quite warm inside, even a little proud. He had to admit the Changelings were hardly the unfeeling, blood-thirsty monsters that the papers had depicted nor the unstoppable army of killers that Canterlot Command had told all the various divisions of the Guard to stay on alert against, although if the Changelings' morale had more to do with having their numbers being reduced from thousands to less than a hundred or not, he couldn’t say.

“You are good with offspring.” The spiderweb-scarred Changeling said abruptly, making Dappled flinch and look around, realizing with some dismay that every Changeling in the room was staring at him. “You have experience with such duties?”

“Uh … not really? I was an only child, and I was always the youngest amongst my cousins, I just … like foals. They’re cute, they’re sweet and all they want is to be with us.” Dappled stammered, hoping he wasn’t about to commit a social faux-paus. The last thing he needed to add to his already floundering career and hopes of a quiet return to the border was the addition of accidentally offending the Changelings to the point that the peace-talks broke down. “Looking after them is a nice reprieve from the constant boredom of my position back at the border.”

“You dislike your caste?” Now another Changeling spoke up, looking puzzled, while several other Changelings either hissed or flinched as if scalded.

“We don’t have … okay, I think there’s a misunderstanding. Ponies don’t have ‘castes’, we haven’t had a rigid social structure for several centuries at least, with the exception of the Princess and the Nobles, and nopony really pays any attention to the Nobles unless their bits are on the table. A Pony can, with the help of the schools and some training from more experienced Ponies, train to become skilled in any profession that they have a talent for, or that they enjoy doing.” The Border Guard babbled, hoping he was explaining Pony society well enough to avoid causing a disaster. But didn’t the Changelings infiltrate Canterlot? How could they not know about something so simple and common-place? “I ended up in the Border Guard because of my … gift … and because I wanted a stable, steady job where I could help out, even if everyone ignored me.”

“…Ponies can choose their caste?” The largest Changeling in the room asked, the aptly-named ‘Guard Prime’s’ monotone voice cracking in surprise.

“Well, for the most part, yes. But just because you’ve been trained or studied for the job doesn’t mean you’ll get it. There’s only so many bakers or plumbers or guards a community needs, after all, so many ponies end up travelling to other towns or cities, or even other countries, to try and find a place where they can do what they enjoy and still make a decent living.”

“Ponies use small pieces of metal to keep track of how much food they require, yes?” Another Changeling asked, craning his … her …it’s head around to stare directly at Dappled. “How do ponies decided how much hay a piece of metal is worth? And why use something inedible? Why not simply share what you have? If all members of the Hive share equally, why would you need to exchange tokens?”

“Well, you see … uh, we might need an expert in here, can I just …” Dappled Light stammered, wishing now he’d paid for more attention to the teacher’s voice than her plot in Economics Class. Stupid school-boy crush!

“No. The Hive trusts you, you shall explain.”

Ah, crapola.

It felt like an agonizing eternity, trying to explain the concept of an economy and the nature of individualism to the Changelings, made thankfully slightly easier by the un-looked-for return of the Head Maid of this wing of the Palace, who had a far more nuanced grasp of the ‘science’ behind it all.

Unfortunately the Head Maid and the ‘Drone Prime’ couldn’t maintain eye-contact with each other for longer than a few seconds without the Head Maid blushing and the Drone Prime’s face glowing green … and right now, Dappled wasn’t sure if that was the Changeling equivalent of blushing or some sort of nausea-signal. It also didn’t help that it also stalled the conversation for upwards of a minute of a time every time it happened, and the two couldn’t seem to stop giving each other sneaky glances at that!

Whatever. So long as the Head Maid is here, at least one Changeling isn’t grilling me for the deep dark secrets of a fully-functional capitalist diarchial society!

“So one uses these ‘bits’ as a form of promise? I will give these tokens, and when I make good on my promise, I receive the tokens back?”

“Something like that. See, our ancestors came up with the concept of currency as a way to keep track of who owed what to whom when two ponies bartered, but one could not provide all their side of the barter all at once, and since gold was valued by almost every race ponykind had met, it served as a suitable form of collateral to be used until the agreed amount of bartered goods could be delivered, or as insurance if something happened to prevent the delivery of those goods.” Dappled explained for what felt like the tenth time to the Changelings, with the now-completely bored foals snuggled against his chest, and Scout’s, for their afternoon nap. And Scout, who had apparently glued herself to Dappled’s flanks, was a constant warm presence that, despite her chitin, seemed to fit against Dappled’s side like they were two puzzle-pieces designed to snap together. Thank Lady Faust that I’m laying on the floor! The last thing I need to explain to the Changelings is why I’ve got half a chubby with the foals cuddled up to me! “Over time and as Equestria began, it evolved into what we have today, where Ponies ‘buy’ things with bits, and the sellers can then use those bits to buy things that they need in turn. It’s … oddly complicated but simple at the same time, if that makes sense?”

“This is because ponies lie? They do not honor their agreements?” The large ‘Guard Prime’ said, her monotone voice cracking again as a scowl dominated her expression.

“Some beings, including ponies, refused to honor their barters, and contracts and other types of agreements for that matter, but we have laws that strictly punish those who do such things. Currency is, I guess, more about keeping score of what you can afford to purchase in society?” Dappled tried to ease the burly, heavily-armored Changeling’s concerns, although her monotone voice and stoic expression didn’t tell him much about his success thus far. “You’ll find cheats and liars everywhere, although more often than not they get socially isolated sooner rather than later if they aren’t very careful. I know the papers here in Canterlot try to paint the Princesses in a poor light, but most Ponies know that’s just because the Nobles own a lot of shares in the media, and the Nobles keep trying to stir up trouble against the Princesses because the Nobles don’t get what they want in Court.”

“These ‘Noble’-Caste try to undercut their Queen?” Guard-Prime hissed, her expression cracking into one of sheer, unadulterated rage. Many of the other Changelings in the room hissed as well, wordless sounds of outrage, and the foals whimpered and shivered in their sleep, which for some reason made the Changelings all go stone-faced again for a few seconds. Oh, their Hive-Mind … does that mean the foals are connected to it as well?

“The Nobles were the original leaders of the Three Tribes that came to this part of the world millennia ago, and some of their descendants … haven’t adjusted well to having an all-powerful Goddess take over their tribes and rule benevolence, kindness and mercy for thousands of years.”

“Ah.” The Changelings in the room seemed to deflate as one. “So Nobles are Lesser Queens who were forcibly brought into Queen Celestia’s Hive, and agitate against her. That makes more sense.”

HOW, by Lady Faust’s mane, does that make sense? Does that mean the Changeling Queens constantly skirmish for leadership? And Chrysalis has gotten Princess Celestia to summon the surviving Queens to Canterlot! Dappled’s mind filled with horrifying images of multiple armies of rival Changeling Hives filling the skies and streets of Canterlot with a running brawl as their Queens duelled for leadership of the combined horde, all the while Chrysalis laughed from the safety of her hospital bed.

Being only a Border Guard, Dappled was mercifully under-informed on Canterlot politics and the Noblity, but unfortunately the Head Maid could not claim such, and was rapidly pestered into a corner by the Changelings who wished to know which ‘Rival, Lesser Queens’ they had to watch out for and protect their Queen, and ‘Allied, Greater Queen’ Celestia, against. As the demands for information became greater, and louder, Royal Guards came to investigate and were quickly dispatched by the flustered Head Maid for aid, returning in short order with members of the Princess’s Royal PR department who had even less of a warm-up before being dragged into the mess.

“It is too loud for the foals in here.” Scout said abruptly, peeling herself off of Dappled so suddenly he was surprised that strips of his hide didn’t go with her, levitating the white foal onto her back and then manually lifting both of the black fillies onto Dappled’s back. “Guard Dappled and I shall return to the Queen’s chambers to see they are fed and cared for.”

Not really caring if Scout was being serious or if this was just some command through the Hive Mind from her scheming Queen, Dappled carefully got onto his hooves and crept out of the room as the other Changelings continued to bombard the unfortunate Ponies with more questions about the way their society worked. Mercifully, the Changling foals seemed quite content to cling sleepily to his back as the mis-matched pair crept into the Queen’s room.

Oddly enough, Chrysalis looked almost gentle as she slept, her features slack and peaceful in the calm grip of sleep, while Candy Apple merely raised an eyebrow at the two as they entered, the massive, burly mare sitting at the Queen’s bedside, a small novel open in her hooves.

“We are returning the foals to sleep with their mother.” Scout said, oddly subdued and giving the larger Pony mare a wide berth as the Changeling and Border Guard slowly put each other’s burden of foals on the bed, the foals cuddling up to their blanket-covered mother and peeping at her, and each other, sleepily before wiggling into more comfortable positions and closing their eyes …

“I’ll see to it that the Queen feeds her brood when she wakes up, but right now sleep is the best thing for her.” The retired nurse said in a very soft voice, barely audible even from the other side of Chrysalis’s Alicorn-sized bed. “So please, the pair of you, buzz off and let her sleep. Chrysalis is going to need to build up as much strength as she can muster for her time in court, let alone the actual operations to heal her injuries.”

“High-Prime-Caretaker.” Scout murmured, bowing low and scooting backwards out of the room as quietly as she could, while Dappled just looked at the retreating Changeling, then back to the burly retired nurse, who simply give the confused Border Guard a small smile before turning her attention back to her novel.

Mares. Dappled thought to himself, resisting the urge to roll his eyes, before trotting out of the room and grunting in pain as Scout tried to melt against his side again with a lot more force than was necessary, nearly knocking him into a wall in the process. “Scout, look, I get the Royal Guards can be intimidating, but …”

“Celestia’s Guard-Caste Drones are not intimidating, the Hive-Mind’s memories show they are easily defeated. High-Prime-Caretaker Candy Apple is intimidating.” Scout mumbled as she pressed herself against Dappled’s flank, shaking slightly.

Huh. Well, I admit that Candy Apple is probably scarier than a Royal Guard, but I think we’d better keep that to ourselves, the Guards here are already touchy enough about being defeated by the Changelings once already, I’d hate to see what they’d be like if they knew a old, retired nurse was considered more intimidating than they are.

“Well, let’s just keep that a secret between us, okay? We don’t want to make the, uh, ‘Guard Caste’ upset with us, things are kind of tense enough as it is.” The Border Guard bumped Scout off of him and took a few steps towards the end of the hallway that led to the exit of the Red Rooms wing … only to nearly trip as Scout went right back to trying to meld into his side, the two nearly tripping on each other’s legs. “Scout! You don’t need to cling to me so much!”

“Is it … bothering you?” The Changeling asked, her face open, innocent … trusting.

Dappled’s mind betrayed him, flashing images of that slender, black face blinking up at him with a similar expression, strands of the Stallion’s semen dripping from her face at their first meeting in a bush at the border of Equestria’s territory, the time she had jumped into the toilets at the barracks with him and he’d caught a glimpse of her privates when trying to push her out of the stall …

“No, it doesn’t, but … it could give others the wrong impression. That you’re easy to, oh Faust how do I say this without being insulting? That you’re a mare who is ‘easy’, who’ll accept any Stallion.”

Scout blinked, slowly, at Dappled before speaking again.

“Ponies would think I am ‘easy’? What would I be ‘easy’ with?”

The pit fell out of Dappled’s stomach.

“Oh dear sweet Faust. Look, let’s … go back to my room, and I can explain to you what I mean without embarrassing either of us.” The frazzled, flustered Unicorn stammered, then slapped a hoof over his face as his mind caught up to his mouth. “Uh, unless you can think of someplace else private? I don’t want Ponies to think badly of either of us, and this subject is sort of … difficult to explain.”

“Your quarters are fine, Guard Dappled. I have no reason to distrust you, and if you say privacy is required to explain, then we shall seek privacy.”

Oh thank you, merciful creator, that the Changeling doesn’t think I’m being a super creep right now. Dappled thought to himself, grateful for small mercies, when he turned his attention back to the end of the corridor, and hopefully escape from this madness, only to see two Royal Guards staring at him with wide eyes and open mouths. OH BUCK ME SIDEWAYS!

“Uh, carry on, Border Guard?” One of the two black-coated Pegasus said, while the other one lifted a fore-leg to his mouth to vainly try to disguise his snickering.

“I guess this gives a whole new meaning to plunge deep into enemy territory.” The second guard snorted, and the two Royal Guards leaned into each other, giving up all semblance of poise and stoicness as they guffawed loudly, while Dappled went a deep crimson from the tips of his ears down to the bottom of his neck and Scout merely tilted her head sideways at the two laughing Guards. “Make sure you don’t leave any of the ‘troops’ behind!”

“Don’t be like that, Dusty, he’s just stamping her passport!”

“Shuffling her papers!”

“Inspecting her luggage!”

“Checking her cargo!”

Whimpering as he imagined the last shreds of hope that his career would ever be salvaged blowing away into the distance, Dappled Light stood there with his eyes closed, desperately praying to Faust for a lightning bolt to strike him down on the spot and end his misery, as the two Guards continued to trade bawdy euphemisms while Scout poked Dappled in the side repeatedly and asked what the two ‘Guard-Drones’ found so amusing.

Unfortunately for Dappled, Faust had other plans that day that did not include the mercy-kill of an unimportant Stallion.

Chapter 66

CHAPTER 66

Night Light sighed as he watched the pristine white walls that encircled Canterlot slowly disappear from sight as the train rounded a bend in the tracks. Not so much because he was homesick already, but in relief.

Thunderwing had already proven her worth to the group a dozen times over with just this plan alone, sneaking everypony out of the sewers with the aid of the Diamond Dogs and then secretly stashing the entire group in a sealed carriage that, from the outside, looked like a simple cargo unit. Nopony, not even the most paranoid member of the Shadow Court, would think to look for the witness that could get Bluebone thrown behind bars forever in a cargo carriage marked as educational materials on the cargo manifest. And that cover would get them all the way to Neigh York, and the biggest, and most feverently loyal to the Thrones if only for the sheer amount of tax write-offs Celestia had organized for the agricultural community, collection of Apple Clan merchants in the country.

Inside, however … Ponies who were old enough to know better clinked cans of beer or glasses of cheap wine together and laughed as they seated themselves on piles of old but still comfortable cushions as the train rattled on it’s way to their freedom. Twilight Velvet had, once again, snagged Thunderwing and the two mares were ensconced in a corner together, whispering to one another and giving him looks that made Night Light’s blood run cold.

The last time Twilight Velvet looked at me like that, eleven months later Twilight Sparkle came into the world. I don’t even want to think about being a father again at my age … or maybe I should. Thunderwing never did get to have foals of her own, and I shouldn’t deny her the opportunity just because we’re getting long in the tooth.

Spud, for his part, was suffering with his usual good humor as his brides started trying to make some form of sleeping quarters, only for the light sway of the train and the cheer of the rest of the crew to keep derailing them. Vet’kloe, despite her sour and fearful attitude in the sewers, laughed with a sound like glass tinkling before picking up a pillow and battering her ugly mountain of a husband with it when he ‘filched’ a pillow from the Zebra’s pile to seat himself down on.

Well, we’re on our way to toppling the Shadow Court and kicking Bluebone and his cronies square in their proverbials. I just … wish that we were heading in Twilight’s direction, but that’s the first place the Shadow Court and their hirelings would look once they realize we’ve flown the coop and it’s the Royal Guard occupying our residence. Thunderwing assures me that there’s a full contingent of Royal Guard, Night Guard and Royal Agents protecting my little filly, but I still feel like a monster for risking that the Shadow Court might come sniffing around Ponyville on the chance her mother and I might be hiding with our daughter. Night Light turned his attention back to the small window, noting the train steaming it’s way in the opposite direction, heading further and further from the sleepy little village his little girl had gone off to, in what felt like a lifetime ago. We’ll have to swing back past Ponyville by the end of our trip, with the Apple Clan hopefully up in arms at our backs and the Shadow Court soiling themselves at the thought of a ‘peasant’ uprising led by the Elements of Harmony themselves.

“Bit for your thoughts, mate?” Bronze Gong murmured next to Night Light, making the old Stallion twitch at the shock of finding another full-grown Pony standing next to him without warning.

“Faust’s teats! Don’t do that, Gong, my heart isn’t what it used to be and I don’t need to throw my back out now.” Night Light hissed at the off-grey Earth Pony, who simply gave the blue Unicorn a wan smile in return. “And I’m hoping my little girl doesn’t end up in the thick of this, not until she’s got her hooves firmly under her at least.”

“Yeah, well, get your head back in the game mate, we’ve got to go over our speel to the Matriarchs of the Apple Clan, and your daughter’s connection to this ‘Applejack’ character is our best bet to get them to listen to us.” The former intelligence agent pointed out, leading Night Light back to a cluster of old soldiers and one of the Princess’s ‘spare’ PR Ponies, a chubby, constantly smiling Earth Pony mare with bright reddish-brown fur, a blonde mane and tail and a black-and-white masquerade mask as her cutie mark. “Cheery here thinks we might have a tough sell with the current leader of the Matriarchs, a sour old biddy called Turnover, who is reported to be more interested in the bottom line than the usual Apple Clan attitude and could very well be our biggest sticking point in the meeting.”

“And doing nothing as the Shadow Court keeps trying to make all of Equestria sub-servient to the air-headed Nobility in Canterlot doesn’t affect her bottom line?” The retired sniper hissed angrily as he joined the group.

“Apple Turnover is notorious for her ‘bits first, everything else second’ attitude, and so long as the Shadow Court looked like a profitable trade-partner, she’d probably leave them alone until it was too late. She’s a Matriarch by marriage and some very cut-throat political maneuvering, not by blood, and that’s something that’s been a sticking point with the Clan for years. But … she gets results, and brings the Clan more bits than they have ever seen in the past century through her trade agreements and wrangling with the other Tribes and even the Thrones, and because of that she’s been allowed to do as she sees fit for the past ten years as the leading voice of the Clan because none of the other Matriarchs have been willing to risk upsetting the apple-cart by calling her out and maybe souring those trade agreements in the process.” Cheery said, even her tone of voice just screaming I am deliriously happy. “That said, Turnover has made a lot of enemies both within and without the Apple Clan due to her business practices and her … charming personality. It’s only because of her continued financial successes that the other Matriarchs have been willing to leave her mostly unchallenged, and even that’s not guaranteed these days with some of the more savvy Matriarchs seeing that Turnover’s tactics will only work for so long before the rest of Equestria gets sick of the sour old mule. That, and the Thrones believe that Turnover orchestrated a financial coup that broke the backs of several of the more powerful Matriarchs, which in turn allowed her to be the one to build up several failing Apple Clan businesses …”

“And of course, being Apples, the ones Turnover helped financially would have given her their full support when the Matriarchs get together to settle internal squabbles, even if she was openly carrying a sign saying ‘I am a raging evil bitch’ in bright neon lights.” Star Streaks, the former scout, muttered darkly. “I get it’s honourable to repay a debt and stay true to the one that helped you, but this is flat out ridiculous.”

“Our evidence also suggests she’s been blackmailing the children of some of the prouder or economically vulnerable Matriarchs, which in turn means toppling Turnover would result in said Matriarchs being shamed when their children are also exposed, and they might be willing to keep propping her up just to save their own faces from being dragged through the mud.” Cheery pointed out, and Night Light could swore he could feel the diabetes setting in just listening to this mare’s voice.

“Ain’t nobody in my Clan that trusts Turnover, not even her own blood, but she’s woven a web of steel round an round my Clan like the meanest spider in the world.” Autumn Glory spat, the Apple-Mare unconsciously grinding a pillow mercilessly between her front hooves. “We’ll have a battle an’ a half to dislodge her, but Cheery, you say that there’s Royal Agents willin’ to help us out once we reach Neigh York?”

“The entire network is shifting as many resources our way as they can manage actually, but we’re having our best agents in that region dropping their usual tasks to assist us. I can’t say I know the Radiance’s mind, but I am willing to bet my last cupcake that Princess Celestia is counting on us to free the Apple Clan from Turnover’s tyrannical leadership and ease the Clan’s stranglehold on the nation’s agricultural sector, and in doing so open the way for us to not only generate enough public support to topple the Shadow Court, but also give a wake-up call to every Tribalist group in Equestria, be they Pegasi, Earth Ponies or Unicorns, that their shit isn’t going to fly in this day and age.” The chubby mare explained in a sing-song tone. “I can safely say that you’re spear-heading a plan that the Royal Agents have been sitting on for several decades now to dislodge the Tribalist groups in Canterlot, Neigh York, Cloudsdale and the other, larger cities, and you have no idea how thrilled we all are to finally have both official sanction to pursue it and a suitably respectable figurehead that the citizens will want to rally around with minimal prompting.”

“But why now? Why us? Why didn’t the Princess stomp out these groups centuries ago before they put down such deep roots?” Night Light grunted as a particularly large bump in the tracks set everyone into the air for a long second before gravity claimed them again.

“Because her Radiance needed to have access to the Elements of Harmony should dark sorcery become involved in cleansing our nation of this filth. Because her sister is finally returned and there can now be true harmony on the Thrones. If her Radiance has to step down from the Throne to topple these enemies, to sacrifice her crown to save Equestria from racial warfare and outright chaos, then Princess Luna, and now Princess Twilight, along with the rest of the Bearers of the Elements if need be, can step forward and hold the line until her Radiance can reclaim her position.” The chubby mare said with absolute sincerity in her voice. “Besides, you are all decorated veterans, targeted maliciously by a Tribalist group who dreams of the day when everything that isn’t a Unicorn is a servant as best, a possession at worst, and is willing to bribe, murder and slander anyone or anything in their path to that goal. Once we get the Apple Clan on board and can start a grass-roots movement, the media from outside Canterlot will just eat this story up like hot cakes! A band of retired heroes and their spouses, on the run and drumming up support to help their beleaguered Princess of the Sun purge an evil, Tribalist organisation from the beating heart of Equestria. You’ll be like action heroes in a movie, just … more wrinkly and with hopefully less explosions and wanton property damage, please?”

The assembled veterans gave the chubby, eternally cheerful mare a collection of unimpressed stares as a response.

“Please?” Cheery said, finally a note of pleading entering her normally sugary-sweet voice. “The Princess allowed me access to your files in preparation for this mission, and I don’t think my budget for this covers the kind of responses you used to rely on back when you were enlisted with the regular forces of her Radiance’s army.”

“It was just one small crate of C4, and I only knocked over one opera hall, and nopony has ever let me live it down for the past fifteen years!” Bronze Gong huffed, annoyed.

“Wait, I thought she was talking about the home-made tear-gas grenade I used?” Star Streaks said in surprise. “And the … uh … the damage to the dam when the dragon tried to wash it’s mouth out by smashing through said dam to get to the water. Which may have washed half the village away in the process.”

“Huh, I thought Cheery was talking about the time my bear of a husband stole Honeydip, Vet’Kloue and myself away from our fathers to elope … and nearly started a three-way war with the Prench and the Zebrican Tribes over our ‘kidnapping’.” Autumn Glory added, a cheeky grin on her face.

“And that is why I am begging you to not act like you used to back in the day!” Cheer begged, now visibly sweating. “We need to handle this with delicacy and discretion, not just go charging into a politically volatile situation half-cocked!”

Night Light looked around at the assembled ponies, and then craned his neck around to give searching looks to the rest of the crew and their spouses, scattered around the carriage, before turning back to Cheery with a apologetic look on his face.

“I can give you a soft maybe, at best.”

Cheery just sniffled and buried her muzzle in the nearest pillow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rosebush, former Captain Rosebush as she kept reminding herself bitterly, attacked the training dummy with considerable vigor, imagining the dummy, a series of spinning wooden poles and padded flails set on a single pillar on which the protrusions could spin when the dummy was activated, wearing the face of Cadence, or Crysalis, or even Celestia herself as the pegasus slammed and smashed her hooves against coloured circles representing vital areas on the dummy that would incapacitate or cripple the opponent.

I wonder if the fact the three biggest pains in my asses all have names starting with C is a simple fluke, or it’s Faust herself telling me they’re all giant, raging cun~

“Private Rosebush, a word if you please?” Acting Captain Dawn Ray said in a terse voice, the aging warhorse not flinching when Rosebush turned to give him a seething look. Logically she knew that Sunbeam was one of the few officers she’d allow to take command with her removed from the position, but it still stung. Being the Captain of the Royal Palace Guard was her position, one she’d fought tooth and hoof to get, fighting against centuries of tradition that insisted only a Unicorn, and a stallion at that, could assume the position, pushing back against overwhelming political pressure from the various noble factions all maneuvering for a Captain who was sympathetic to their specific intrigues.

And Celestia had replaced Rosebush in less than an hour …

“Captain.” Rosebush said with emphasis, saluting smartly. Bitching at the poor bastard who had to take up the role after I lost control is unworthy of me, and unfair to him. Besides, a week or two of ‘good’ behaviour just to prove to the Princess that this was just a fluke, and this stupid ‘holiday’ Celestia has given me will be rescinded and I’ll be back where I belong.

“At ease, private, this isn’t an official meeting … although the maintenance crew has complained you’re working the training dummies a bit too hard. No, I’m here to let you know about the fact that Princess Cadence and Royal Consort Shining Armor have left Canterlot to go visit Princess Twilight in Ponyville.”

“Forgive my bluntness, Captain, but I fail to see why I need to know that.” The pegasus tried to keep her voice level and emotionless, but Rosebush knew her temper was showing in her body-language at the very least. The thought that Cadence had absconded once again with Rosebush’s boyfriend and was smoozing up to the newest Princess set the Royal Guard’s blood to boiling.

“…” Dawn Ray gave her a searching look before shaking his head sadly. “Cute, Rosebush, but you’re not fooling anypony. The Princess wants me to make sure you’re not going to have a ‘relapse’ if and when you encounter either Princess Cadence or Queen Chrysalis again. Especially Queen Chrysalis given that she’s current under Princess Celestia’s own protection and has a blood-pact in place that will rebound significantly upon any Pony who attacks her or any of the Drones that belong to her Hive.”

Rosebush remained at parade-stance, stone-faced.

Dawn Ray sighed and rubbed at his muzzle with a hoof. “Look, Rosebush, I get it. You’re one of the best, perhaps the best Pegasus the Royal Guard has seen join their ranks in the past century. You’re loyal to a fault, politically astute and your combat scores are all in the top ninety percentile of our soldiers. But this … thing you have with Cadence over Shining Armor has got to stop.” The aging Unicorn said with heat as he gave Rosebush a scorching look that threatened to crack her mask-like expression before the old warhorse turned his gaze away to the mass of Royal Guards practicing formations on the other side of the training field. “You claim that Princess Cadence abused her position and her powers to seduce Shining Armor out from under you, and if it weren’t for the fact that I’d seen Princess Cadence try to hang herself, as a filly, after realizing the harm her reckless attempts to foster love had caused, I might even believe it.”

“If you can’t accept that, regardless of the how that Cadence and Shining ended up together, and that your relationship with Shining Armor ended years ago, then I am afraid your position as the Captain of the Royal Palace Guard will pass permanently to another Pony. All that work to smack those stubborn heads around until they let a Pegasus hold the position, rolling back centuries of tradition and Noble privilege and fighting the status quo every damn day will have been for nothing.” The stallion continued, his voice strong, firm, but worst of all, calm. “And worse still, every tribalist idiot who thinks a pegasus has no business giving orders to unicorns will use your actions as an excuse to discriminate against any other mare or non-unicorn who aims for the top post in the future. So I want you to think very damn hard about the words that will come out of your mouth when you speak to the Princess, because if you can’t put your duty before your personal life, you’ll not only be taking the knife to your own career, but to the careers of every pegasus, earth pony, thestral or any other species that tries to aim for the top spot in Canterlot’s military.”

Rosebush blinked several times, trying to hold back the hot sting of tears. It just wasn’t fair! Shining had been a caring lover, a great friend. Things had only gotten rocky after Rosebush has asked Cadence, newly returned from her ‘convalesence’ with the psychologists and the Princess, to use her newly-stabilized Alicorn powers to see if Shining Armor and Rosebush had a future together, and then the duty roster had been reshuffled for some reason that nopony could or would explain, and Rosebush found herself isolated from both her friend and her lover.

Two months of silence from both the pink Alicorn and Rosebush’s boyfriend had been agonizing to bear, as Shining was suddenly pulled away to permanent ‘escort’ duty that all but ensured he and Rosebush barely even got to see each other at the messhall and the rumor-mills began churning out stories about Princess Cadence taking up, of all things, foal-sitting in her spare time. And then finally, when Rosebush had gotten a day off, she’d gone running to Shining’s home, knowing that on that day, he’d also be assigned a rest-day and they could finally spend some time together, maybe they could finally introduce Rosebush to Shining’s parents, only to see Shining and Cadence hugging each other on the front door-step.

And then they had kissed. A deep, lingering kiss that only those who had been intimate could achieve. Cadence, staring into Shining’s eyes with a half-lidded expression of satisfaction. Shining, grinning back at the Princess with the same goofy look he had used to give Rosebush after their love-making before they would have to rush to the showers to make themselves presentable before going back on duty.

Even now, the pain still struck Rosebush like a physical blow. She’d trusted Cadence, she’d believed in Shining, and yet somehow in a mere two months, that festering pink maggot of a whorse had wiggled into the cracks between Shining and Rosebush and pushed the two soldiers apart. If it had been the unique magic of her position, or being the Alicorn of Love simply made Cadence slicker than a greased-up pickle when it came to seduction, Rosebush didn’t know, couldn’t know, but what she did know is that the moment Cadence had gotten involved, any hope of Rosebush’s happily ever after with the Stallion of her dreams had miscarried into the gutter.

Apparently her feelings hadn’t been buried as deeply as she thought, given how Dawn Ray had paled and taken a step back from her when Rosebush’s attention returned to the outside world.

“I accept that Shining Armor and Cadence are married, sir, and while I admit that I still have tremendous doubts about the accuracy of Cadence’s claims to innocence, I will abide by the decisions made by my Princess on the situation … until proof is more forthcoming.” Rosebush said in her best ‘loyal soldier’ tone, hoping that Dawn Ray would accept her reply. “In regards to my, ah, lack of discipline regarding the Changeling Queen, that will not happen again. Between the stress of having to handle a visiting member of stay attempting to subvert my orders from the Thrones to pursue her own petty vendetta, the Changeling Queen actively trying to pick a fight by poking at my previous relationship with Shining Armor, having the Shadow Court nearly assassinate the mercenaries who represent the best lead we have had in centuries on how to topple those tribalist scum, and then having the Three Generals strip the castle of all my big guns, I was … on edge, to say the least.”

Dawn Ray sighed and nodded once, a sharp, curt gesture. “Fair enough, although I will warn you that the Princess is likely to watch you like a hawk to make sure this doesn’t happen again. Still, unofficially, be prepared to remain as a Private for a few months longer, but the Princess has mentioned she intends to reinstate you once the Changeling Queen’s trial is over and done with.”

“Forgive my asking, but a few months? The Princess really assumes the Changeling’s trial will take that long?” The pegasus whimpered at the implication of months of this shame!

“Considering that she has mentioned at least three other Changeling Queens live on this continent and will likely be busting their chitinous backsides trying to reach Equestria within the time-limit for that amnesty offer? And assuming that the Changeling Queen’s health issues don’t degrade further and Bedside Manner insists we put her on the table immediately to save her life, the Princess believes we will be lucky if the trial takes place this year.” The older unicorn gave Rosebush a sympathetic look as Rosebush’s whimper turned into a low-pitched whine of distress. “And that’s not including the debacle that is Sunset mother-bucking Shimmer squatting in the Cell of Ultimate Confinement and writing letters that are more like novellas about how much she wants to screw Princess Twilight stupid and rule the world with her.”

Rosebush blinked a few times, not entirely sure how she was supposed to respond to that except for hysterical laughter or horrified screaming.

“We’re … not letting that go through to the newest Princess, right? Her file is … Twilight Sparkle is the definitionof neurotic, and has nearly suicidal tendencies when it comes to trying to befriend and redeem the irredeemable. I don’t even want to think about what might happen to her if she tries to purify an obsessive succuponi before her Ascension is complete!”

“Princess Celestia is reviewing every scrap of paper that comes out of that cell personally, both for content and potential infectious materials or corruptive spell-work. Nothing that could send our newest Royal even more around the bend is going anywhere near Ponyville, although it is being stored for Princess Twilight to go over at a later stage.”

“We’re going to let her Brainy-ness go over that drivel? I thought we were trying to prevent a disaster, not cause one!”

“Princess Celestia believes a clue to how Sunset Shimmer was turned into a succuponi, and how she returned to Equestria without triggering any of the thousands of arcane wards, mystical alarms and supernatural traps set around the locations where the barrier between our world and others are at their thinnest might be found in those letters. And if those letters should also be able to help Princess Twilight find a way to convince Sunset Shimmer to accept purification without needing another knock-down brawl like what happened in Ponville, then so much the better.”

“And what happens when our resident she-demon figures out none of her fan-letters are getting delivered and she starts to test the limits of the Cell of Ultimate Confinement?”

“Then the Princess gets to see if the king’s ransom in bits spent designing, developing and building that infernal thing was a sound investment, or just more money being pissed into the wind by Bleak Mountain and his Fourth Circle Magi.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sunset Shimmer sighed. She wasn’t angry, not really, but she wasn’t happy either. This ‘Cell of Ultimate Confinement’ didn’t allow her to do any magic beyond simple telekinesis, and allowing her telekinetic field to even brush against the surface of the cell, be it the floor, walls, ceiling or door, produced vicious feedback that could knock her out for hours on end and leave her with migraines that lasted even longer.

But Celestia, whatever her game was, certainly saw to it that Sunset was brought back up to speed on the changes to Equestria since … since …

Sunset put a hoof to her head and winced. Ever since she’d come into this room, the headaches had started, coming on especially strong when she tried to think back to when she had left Equestria, and even worse when she tried to think about the day when everything had gone so wrong, and yet so right.

When Twilight had rallied that alternate world’s version of the Element Bearers and stopped Sunset, when the world around them was being rent by random portals linking Earth to Equestria and to other worlds …

“Gah!” Sunset hissed, dropping her quill as the now-familiar stab of pain beneath her horn sent agony lancing through her skull. Every time she tried to think about what happened after that event, after being purified, Sunset found herself in agony.

It certainly wasn’t the Cell’s defences. That hurt, certainly, but it was a short, sudden burst that faded away the instant her magical fields stopped coming into contact with the Cell’s defences. No, this was something inside Sunset, the same something that had writhed in agony when Celestia’s divine magic had wrapped around Twilight’s library, nearly paralysing Sunset, the same feeling as when this ‘Luna’ character’s barrier had seared the hide from Sunset’s muzzle when Sunset had tried to snatch up Twilight. The pain felt something like the pulses of squirming agony from a broken tooth, screaming at her long after the event itself was over and done with, sickening her to her stomach and making her head foggy with pain and the urge to empty her stomach onto the floor.

Am I a demon? The thought came unbidden as Sunset gritted her teeth against the roiling sensation of pain that crawled down her neck and into her body, almost wishing Celestia had followed the advice from her Magi and cut Sunset’s horn off. At least the pain of a severed horn would fade in a matter of days as the new growth set in and the nerve-endings began to regrow, but this ‘phantom’ pain that seemed set on punished Sunset every time she tried to grasp how her plans had failed was relentless, sadistic and completely the opposite of anything Celestia would use, or approve of using, on a prisoner.

The thought that she might be literally Tartarus-bound gave Sunset pause. Had Gothica, Queen of the Underworld and Warden of Tartarus, decided to skip the formalities and turn Sunset into a fiend, as the old stories claimed happened to the truly wicked, while the unicorn was still alive? Did that even happen?

As much as thinking about it hurt, Sunset couldn’t stop turning the concept over and over in her mind, wondering if perhaps the other Alicorns were right. Sunset wasn’t one of them, but some sort of demonic monster.

But that meant that Twilight Sparkle hadn’t purified Sunset … or something inside Sunset had refused to let go of that corruption.

That sickened Sunset more than the pain did. She knew she was arrogant, but she had reason to be, she was the best of the best, hoof-picked by Princess Celestia herself, trained personally by the Goddess of the Sun … but what did that mean if the powers of Tartarus itself found sufficient ground in Sunset’s soul to resist the Elements of Harmony?

Sunset did not consider herself to be evil, yet the evidence remained that, to all intents and purposes, she was a Fiend. Divine power, such as what was wielded by Alicorns, caused her immense pain now, while when much younger and as Celestia’s personal student, being bathed in Celestia’s radiant magic felt … wholesome, like being forgiven for some horrible crime she hadn’t even know she’d done, like being swallowed up in her long-absent mother’s embrace and snuggled, smothered in love and affection.

And for all the bitterness and anger she felt towards Celestia, Sunset knew that the Solar Princess would give anything to save those weaker than herself, to protect the meek and the small from the powerful and the mighty.

So the fault has to be mine, somehow.Something inside me is still corrupted, and I have to figure out what it is, or the Princess will never let me out of this infernal cell, and I will never be able to tell Twilight just how much she means to me.

Gritting her teeth and using her telekinesis to lift a bed-sheet to wipe the blood that trickled from her nose, ears and tear-ducts from the constant, sickening pain that squirmed through her mind and body, Sunset cast her mind back, unable to stop the wail of pain escaping from her as she used a simple trick Celestia had taught her many years ago, to send her conscious mind back through her memories, to try and find when her corruption had occurred.

If Sunset had thought the pain was awful before, she now considered it a mild annoyance as the pain came on in waves that threatened to make her black out, now joined by a feeling like running into a cloying cloud of thick mist that clawed at her mind and filled Sunset with a sensation of fear and loathing that made her think of a time when she spent every night cowering beneath her blankets for fear of monsters under her bed, but the Unicorn focused her will and her formidable intellect into a sharp lance and drove in against the pain, piercing on and on while, as if at a great distance, she could hear the guard shouting at her and each other, until she came up against something, a solid ‘force’ in her mind that gibbered at her, smashing up against the ‘point’ of Sunset’s will, screaming in tongues at her and struggling to push her back.

No! This is my mind, my soul! I will not be denied!

With a feeling line a metal saw grinding against her skull, Sunset deflected herself against the alien force, grinding past it and then she was free … beyond the pain, beyond the miasma-like feeling.

And suddenly she remembered everything. The years of scraping by in the Human world, the things she’d had to do, to endure, just to put food in her mouth and a roof over her bed. How simple it had been to turn all she’d had to do into power, turning sex into a weapon, weakness into strength, secrets into leverage.

Grief consumed Sunset for a moment as she thought back to the person she’d been before her recklessness and ego sent her through the mirror. That stupid, self-absorbed filly is dead. And I have to live on to make sure that death was not in vain. And then she pushed on, and felt another barrier fail and pass her by, but this one felt less alien, more … familiar. It felt like a lock sliding into a key, and a great weight fell off of Sunset like a rain-heavy cloak as she passed through.

Years of manipulation, of doing hateful things that she had recoiled at during the first few months of her time at Canterlot High until regret turned into acceptance and then twisted into a grim sort of satisfaction at a job well done. Social queens who were used to be masters of all that they surveyed who quavered as Sunset walked past. Jocks and Nerds alike met her eyes with pitiful puppy-dog anticipation that she might make their simple adolescent fantasies come true. Teachers caught her eye and looked away first for fear of what Sunset might do to their careers if they didn’t give her passing grades, or access to another student’s files … all of them hers to use, make or destroy as her whim and needs dictated.

I am not that pony anymore, I refused to be. I accepted that the Humans would lash back at me for years of abuse, but my friends …Sunset hiccupped mentally as she thought of them, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie … they’d stood by Sunset and tried to help her, accepting her intention to be a better person with such a shockingly openness that for a few days, Sunset had been worried it was some sort of elaborate prank to get her to open up to them so they could gut Sunset emotionally in turn.

And it had worked. Sunset would never be popular, never have many friends in Canterlot High. The scars ran too deep, the damage too severe, but the natives had begun to accept that Sunset wasn’t just cowed, but deeply regretful and desperately trying to make amends.

And then … the portal … Sunset had been waiting for the student body to go home so she could sneak into the abandoned shed on the campus grounds she had been using as a bedroom for the past three years, walking around the campus with one of Rarity’s awful romance novels to pass the time and her route had taken her past the statue that served as the Earth-side of the portal. A sudden longing had gripped Sunset, her world narrowing down to the base of the statue, the hope of going home, away from the awful memories, the guilt and the shame and regret that consumed her sleeping hours with nightmares and terrors that left her bolting upright, screaming with tears streaking down her face.

And then three new students that Sunset had just shown around the campus that morning had come out of nowhere, grinning at her like sharks, three massive red gems hanging around their necks, gems that sparkled with magic that was so rare in that alien world …

“Sorry about this, but you overstayed your welcome, and somebody’s paying us in magic to make sure you’re out of the way.”

“And let’s be honest … we need you out of the picture for our own reasons. Sending you off like this is just getting paid for something we’d have to do anyways.”

While the yellow-skinned and pink-skinned girl had gloated, shoving Sunset back against the statue with unnatural strength, her mind racing in a panic even as her body slow struggled to obey Sunset’s commands, the transformed Unicorn finding herself strangely lethargic as the trio pushed her up against the statue. Then the blue-skinned one had given Sunset an apologetic look before rushing forwards and planting her boot straight into Sunset’s belly, doubling her up and pushing Sunset into the base of the statue.

Into the base of the statue and through the stone, which should not have opened into the portal to Equestria for months yet.

But then, the portal wasn’t too Equestria at that moment, at least not directly. What the ones who had been behind it all hadn’t counted on, however, was that Sunset had been exposed to Celestia’s divine magic for years, and despite her actions, that magic had left certain indelible marks on Sunset’s soul, marks that deflected their curse for the most part, funnelling Sunset back up towards home and away from that awful realm, and the Coven, before their awful work was completed.

Sunset screamed and threw herself back out of her mind, the barriers that had almost stymied her before flashing past her, the familiar-feeling barrier of guilt and regret healing seamlessly behind, while the pain-inducing miasma lashed at her mind with tendrils of dark mist again, screaming in gibberish still but remained as damaged as Sunset had left it as the Unicorn rocketed back up to her conscious mind.

When her eyes refocused on the real world, Sunset found herself staring into Celestia’s terrified face, the pure-white Alicorn holding Sunset in her hooves, horn ablaze with golden magic not yet focused onto a single spell or task.

The scene caused Sunset a moment of déjà vu, memories of countless times Celestia had held her like that as a foal crowding Sunset’s mind, threatening to distract her, and regretfully Sunset pushed them aside for now.

“The … Coven.” Sunset croaked, tasting bile and blood at the back of her throat. How much damage did I do to myself piercing the veils? “Coven … found a way. My stupid … attempt to invade Equestria … weakened your barriers from their side.”

“No …” Celestia whispered, eyes going wide in horror as her hoof trailed over Sunset’s cheek, coming away bloodied. Oh. That’s not good. Glad this place doesn’t have a mirror.

“Tried to … bring Earth and Equestria together to invade, thought it was my idea. Your barriers shield Equestria from Tartarus, but not Earth from Tartarus. Coven … wanted to invade Earth, send Humans through the portals, corrupt them, turn them into fiends and …” Sunset coughed heavily, feeling several somethings tear in her chest and a splatter of coppery-tasting fluid inside her mouth. “Humans, Earth, there’s almost no magic on their homeworld, but they can hold limitless amounts of magical energy inside their bodies if they are exposed to it under the right conditions. Coven wanted to … to use humans, drag them through the void between worlds, charge them with magic, drain them to empower the Coven and convert the humans into fiends in the process.”

“So-sorry, Celestia, only wanted to … prove I was good enough. Never wanted to hurt anypony … not really. Coven … has been working on Earth for thousands of years. Feeding them half-truths, nudging them towards conflict, making good leaders make bad … bad calls.”

“Sunset, stop, please, we need to let the healing spells get to work, you’ve nearly killed-“ Celestia whispered, her horn blazing with magic and Sunset’s vision began to grow black around the edges.

Well, either the healing wards are about to drop me into a medical coma, or I’m going to see Gothica directly and get some answers about what I am, assuming I don’t just get immediately shunted into one of the prison-planes of Tartarus for my sins.

“Earth … going to be invaded. Needs help.” Sunset whispered as she felt herself beginning to fade in Celestia’s hooves. “Three girls, red … red stones as necklaces, powerful magic and their voices are so … so strange … couldn’t fight them when they started talking, like my … mind went blank …”

And then the world went dark, Sunset spiralling down into her own mind, but the light followed her, two orbs of solar magic that swirled down with her mind, recoiling as the miasma came roiling up to meet them before rushing past Sunset as she ‘fell’, the orbs screaming in rage and fury as they rushed to meet the miasma and exploded, turning into sheets of golden-white flame that roared across Sunset’s mind, a cleansing fire that consumed the miasma even as voices that were not Sunset’s own screamed in turn, in fear and frustration.

And then Sunset fell into the second barrier, which did not open this time, but instead cushioned her fall, making Sunset feel as if she was falling into warm water that slowed her descent as she went down, down, deeper into the blackness while Celestia’s magic raged above her, burning the miasma away in an aria of fire and fury.

As Sunset’s fall slowed, the Unicoron found herself slipping into the still, calm center of her mind, a place she was not all that well acquainted with, truth be told, because most of her previous contact with this part of her mind kept on showing Sunset just how horrible of a person she had been. And now … she wasn’t alone.

Hello child. I see our daughter is engaged in dealing with the fiends’ work, so we will just keep you down here and out of the way. The poor girl would never forgive herself if she accidentally scorched you while dealing with the parasite planted in your soul. The voice was warm, soft, making Sunset feel as if she was wrapped in Celestia’s magic again, but more so if that were possible, as if she was floating, suspended, in warmth and acceptance, and the feeling that she was safe filled her being in a way that nothing else had.

Who … who are you? Sunset asked, floating weightlessly now. She should have been panicking, she knew that, she was now talking with an alien entity inside her own mind after discovering two very different barriers within her consciousness that appeared to have been sealing parts of her personality and manipulating her, so the fact she was responding like being asked about the weather was concerning.

That … would take too long to properly explain and your mind will not remain receptive to the level of contact we need to reach down to your level for half of that explanation to make sense. Your people call us ‘Faust’, and for now that will suffice for our purposes.

I am talking to God right now?

That is one of the names your people give us, yes. But please, child, focus, we do not have long and there is much to explain. Your destiny still remains viable, despite the attempts to subvert it, but you must regain absolute sovereignty of your own mind and embrace Harmony, or you will fail.

I’ll stay a fiend if I can’t?

No. Even now, Celestia’s spellwork begins to unravel the possession and the nature of her magic is reinforcing the harmonious parts of your soul to counter the side-effects of the possession. It will take months to fully purge the infestation, and you may never again be wholly a Pony on a physical level, but you will not become a Fiend again unless you willingly walk down that path.

An-and my destiny, what is it?

You are the Shimmering Light that will light the way in this world’s darkest hour, and the bulwark against which the Discordant Song shall break and through which the Lonely Voice find Harmony again.

Forgive me, Faust, but that really doesn’t explain much, or fill me with confidence.

We cannot tell you directly, or else we might cause your destiny to fail as surely as the fiends attempted to, because you might seek to fulfil your destiny directly and miss the encounters that would lead you to success normally. The voice became tinged with sadness and Sunset was consumed with the odd need to hug the source of the voice. We have learned this the hard way, when our first child fell from grace because we gave too much too soon, and they became obsessed with bypassing the lessons that would have tempered them into wisdom.

So the prodigy got full of themselves and failed abysmally … wow, hello nostalgia.

Your mistakes were those of a mortal, Sunset, and as such can be fixed by mortal means. If you can embrace true Harmony and learn to live with your past, your destiny will unfold as it is meant to, and history may continue on the course it was always meant to.

And if I can’t?

Then history shall divert down an aberrant course, and all we have made shall be set on the path of corruption and despair.

So, no pressure then? Got it.

Your ability to find humor in this situation fills us with hope that you will persevere, Sunset. The path to redemption will be long, but we have faith in you, and those who will stand at your side.

… Will one of those be Twilight?

Yes, although we are unable to say if the Pillar’s role in your life will be as friend, mate or ally. That is, as ever, up to you and her.

Well, it’s something, at least. Thank you, Faust, but … I’ve got so many questions …

You will get the answers to those questions, but not now. Soon, you must wake and begin to prove yourself to our daughter. If she does not trust you when the Discordant Song returns to your world, the aberrant future will become much closer to reality. You must be standing at the side of the Pillar, the Hope-Bringer, the Lover and the Dreamer without shackles upon you when they stand at the portal, or your destiny will come undone.

Sunset wanted to ask more, but a feeling not unlike extreme fatigue was tugging on her mind, dragging her further down and away from the presence of ‘God’, and the voice of ‘Faust’ was getting fainter.

Remember. You must re-embrance Harmony and be ready to defend our daughters when the time comes. Nothing else matters. Destiny demands you rise to the occasion, Sunset Shimmer, or the whole world will suffer.

I … I’ll try! Sunset tried to shout back as she felt the connection begin to fade, her mind slipping out of that still, calm center.

That is all we have ever asked. Came the final reply before Sunset fading into true unconsciousness, and the connection faded entirely.

Chapter 67

CHAPTER 67

Twilight wasn’t entirely sure what she was supposed to be feeling as she watched Shining Armor carry Cadence away, his wife cunningly restrained with silk ropes, ropes that Twilight still wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to know where Trixie had been stashing them or how Trixie knew how to bind a Pony in such a way as to immobilize them entirely and still make it look like mere decorations.

To the casual observer, it would merely seem like Shining Armor was carrying his sleeping wife, who was in turn covered by a large, heavy woollen blanket, out of the library on his broad back with some ornamental ribbons tied around her limbs that poked out from under the blanket. To anypony unlucky enough to have seen the prep-work, Cadence was restrained by an impossibly-long length of thin, smooth silk rope that criss-crossed across Cadence’s body in way that uncomfortably reminded Twilight of a scene from one of Spike’s confiscated Neighponese comics.

The fact that Spike and Trixie had hoof-bumped after the deed was done only deepened Twilight’s concerns. That Shining had offered advice to the pair during the process of immobilizing her fellow princess turned her stomach as her subconscious unhelpfully threw up imagery explaining why Shining might know how to bind his wife.

Shining Armor had been fully supportive of Twilight and Luna’s relationship, which had done wonders for helping Twilight feel a little bit safer and calmer within her own home, even going so far as to give them a list of ponies they could go to for support if the pressure ‘got too much’, including relationship councillors, Throne-sympathetic business ponies whose establishments would cater to the Princesses’ needs discreetly and Royalist nobles, including a name that had made Twilight’s eyebrows nearly merge with her mane in surprise.

Now there’s a name I didn’t think I would ever see recommended as a positive. But … it has been years since we last met, and he does have a lot of … issues to deal with. The purple Alicorn sighed and rubbed her hoof over the name in question, a small smile spreading across her face.

Most of Canterlot forgot that Princess Cadence wasn’t the first Royal to spend time under the roof of Night Light and Twilight Velvet, even if the first had only become a member of Equestria’s royalty retroactively.

“Seriously? Blueblood?” Luna scoffed, eying the paper with equal amounts of concern and disbelief. “He’s only on my sister’s ‘side’ because half of Canterlot would roast him alive without her patronage.”

“He wasn’t always such a foppish dandy. Back when Blueblood’s sister went, uhm, missing, and he was disowned by his father for publicly calling Bluebone out on his Tribalist attitudes during a public press conference about a spate of missing fillies and mares in Canterlot, my father took Blueblood into our family’s care as a ward.” Stepping away from the windowsill and wishing Shining and the Crystal Guards, but specifically not Flash, luck as they navigated the horde of reporters camped outside of the Ponyville Library, Twilight closed the blinds and turned her full attention to Luna. “He was very sad and lonely, he didn’t really trust anypony much, but considering the Guard thought his own father was behind the disappearances, including Blueblood’s own sister …”

“Mmmph. I remember my sister speaking of it in passing, but I honestly was not paying attention as I thought this ‘Blueblood’ was just another sycophant hovering around my sister, and the instant I learned he had any blood relation to Princess Platinum’s line I lost all interest entirely.” The larger Alicorn grunted and tried to find a more comfortable on Twilight’s writing chair, not having much luck due to being entirely too large for the furniture. “Although I will admit I have noticed he sees my sister in private quite often and my sister seems quite happy to receive him.”

“Whatever issues we may have with his personality these days, Blueblood is personally responsible for several charities that deal with and help fund legal representation under-represented minorities seeking the aid of the Courts in Canterlot, and he’s pretty famous for holding charity balls and auctions. That gives him some … positive influence, I guess? It’s why Rarity thought he was some sort of prince charming and thought seducing him at the Grand Galloping Gala that one time was her shoe-in to joining the Nobility.”

“Speaking of Rarity, my Thestrals report that your friend is doing better than we expected, with Moonbeam acting as Rarity’s confidant and Nurse Redheart’s … unusual methods forcing her to continue to interact with the world and denying Rarity the opportunity to withdraw into her shell and brood. Although I suspect Rarity might not consider Redheart’s less than delicate approach, if Moonbeam’s report is accurate, as a positive. Something about being shaved bald?”

“…” Twilight turned and gave Luna a stunned look as she imagined that particular scenario, and shuddered. There were no ear-muffs made on the planet that would save Redheart from the outraged screeching even mentioning such a thing within Rarity’s hearing, and it would have probably required at least knocking the Fashionista back into unconsciousness to finish the task without both nurse and patient ending up in the emergency room afterwards.

Rarity did practice Tai Chi to maintain her figure and help calm herself down after a hard day’s work, and she did hold her own in the infrequent fights that popped up on the Bearers’ adventures … And now I’ve made myself sad. Rarity’s no longer a Bearer and I’m stuck with Generosity rattling around in my head being a giant stone dick, if I might add. Twilight ‘shouted’ that part of her thoughts into the back of her own mind, and was rewarded with a flash of outrage from the Rogue Element before Magic came surging back in again, throwing a flash of it’s own back at Twilight of mingled amusement and contrition, before Magic pushed Generosity back into whatever corner of Twilight’s mind that had been partitioned without her noticing so many years ago. Yet I’m certain our friendship will endure. We’ve survived worse, and we’ll get through this, although I suspect not without more than our fair share of lumps. Luna’s insistence on the Royal Psychologist coming to Ponyville is probably one of the better things to happen to the girls and myself since Faust only knows what other baggage they might be carrying around just waiting to sink us like that iceberg that took down the Titanic.

My siblings assure me the other Bearers have nothing quite so severe as what happened to Lady Rarity awaiting them, I assure you, Pillar. but it would be wise for the remaining Bearers to be brought back to the task before us, namely shielding you through the remainder of your Ascension.

No, they are my friends, and I will not allow them to … allow them … YOU CAN TALK?

Technically, we always could, but we were bound by ancient laws to not speak directly to the Bearers if they were not Immortals. While you are not technically an Immortal yet, it is only a matter of time and I believe the Powers and the Mother of Stone will forgive this small transgression in light of my sibling’s … crimes.

“Twilight, you’re looking perturbed. As in ‘I require the mother of all hugs’-levels of perturbed.” Luna muttered, giving Twilight a searching look.

“Uh, Magic just started talking to me …” The purple Alicorn said in a shocked tone, which in turn caused Luna to jump to her hooves and advance on Twilight.

“Tell it to include me in the conversation. And don’t let it tell you otherwise, I was it’s former Bearer, and I know damn well the Elements can create a network to link several minds together if it needs to, and it bloody well needs to right now.”

Please tell the Dreamer I will initiate the contact as soon as she allows me access. Her mental defences are … significantly more complex than before.

“Magic says your mind is too heavily protected for it to penetrate, you need to make an opening for it.”

“I have spent the better part of a thousand years fortifying my mind to hold back the Nightmare Spirit, and now I am being asked to … fine. We shall have answers for Generosity’s betrayal of it’s duties and the fellowship with the other Elements, and I wish to be involved directly so as to be able to inform my sister correctly on what has occurred.” Sighing heavily after several seconds of tense silence, Luna gave Twilight a wan smile. “Also, despite your great skill at dictation, I doubt you will want to face the Element of Magic alone.”

“Yeah, kind of alarmed about having to deal with the sneaky little pervert that’s been living between my ears for the past three years without some sort of emotional backup.”

I have little interest in the disgusting biological necessities of you fleshies, and even less in your pointless ruttings with the Dreamer, although I will admit watching your neurons sparking when you are deep in thought is always fascinating.

“Okay, it just called me a ‘fleshy’ and it confirmed it’s been watching us … snuggling.” Twilight muttered, going bright pink from the shame.

“Oh, oh, we are so telling the Mother of Stones when we see her that the Elements are not just lax in their duties, but have degenerated into racist voyeurs too.” The Lunar Princess squealed with delight, clopping her hooves together as a manically gleeful smile spread across her face.

Bitch.

“And I am not repeating that.”

“Give me a minute to tease some of my astral wards apart just enough to allow Magic to establish a connection, Twilight, and you won’t have to.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia paced back and forth at Sunset’s side, a task made far more difficult considering the Cell of Ultimate Confinement wasn’t truly made with a being of her size in mind, and for all the impressive control and phenomenal resistances her Regalia provided, it wasn’t the most flexible thing to wear in a confined space.

Sunset had spoken of the Coven, a force that Celestia had spent a considerable amount of time and energy erasing from history to prevent the stupidly ambitious from attempting to repeat the blasphemous sorcery that had turned a group of cannibalistic misandrist blood-witches into a force of highly-infectious mortal Fiends that had threatened to plunge the world into a lust-fueled extinction event. There would have been no way for Sunset to have even learned of the Coven’s existence, or even the fact that their descendants now lived on as the Succuponies in one of the lower levels of Tartarus itself unless they had directly contacted Sunset in some fashion, which added a disturbing level of credence to her former student’s claims.

Adding to the disturbing wrinkle in Celestia’s plans was that Sunset also claimed the Coven was attempting to invade Equestria from a different world, rather than trying, unlike so many who were sentenced or banished to the Prison-Plane, to break out of their cells directly or convince the Mortals to summon them out of Tartarus. Starswirl the Bearded, ever unflappable and smugly confident, had emerged from the other side of the portal, shaking, pale-faced and demanding a blood-oath from Celestia and Luna that neither of them would ever set hoof through the portal.

It had been that oath, and the grim wondering of whatever was on the other side of that portal that could send even her ancient and curmudgeonly teacher into such a panic, that had convinced Celestia that if Sunset had crossed over, then she must have been slain by the occupants.

To hear from Twilight that her former student had not only been forced to live alone in a foreign world, to try and infiltrate a highly advanced society with alien customs simply to survive, a society possessing a very comprehensive and complex records system that made simply inserting a brand new member into that society all but impossible to do without somebody becoming aware of the ruse sooner or later and an species-wide unhealthy obsession with excessive violence as a form of entertainment had dealt a blow to Celestia’s heart that still twinged as she stared down at the sleeping, bloodied face of her former student.

And yet there had been no writing in the Journal. I wonder if Sunset merely believed the Journal was the key to unlocking the Portal, or if … Celestia’s heart twinged again as she touched on an idea that was as loathsome as it was heart-breaking.

What if Sunset had been waiting for Celestia to contact her first, to check up on her wayward student who must have just up and disappeared after their fight and taken such a powerful relic with her in the process. As the days dragged on into weeks, into months, trapped in a world with barely any magic and having to adapt to life amongst the savage creatures who lived there, Sunset would have been unaware that her teacher had mourned her as dead and instead come to believe she truly had been abandoned in every sense of the word.

“Sunset …” Celestia whimpered, trailing a hoof along Sunset’s cheek, and feeling the twinge turn into a full blown wrench as the sleeping mare leaned into the contact for several moments, her features smoothing into calm relaxation before crying out in her sleep and pulling away, Sunset’s hide singed and blistered from where even that short amount of contact with Celestia’s armored hooves had burnt her.

Celestia could only hold Sunset safely in her hooves if she divested herself of her armor. And if Celestia did that, then she might become vulnerable to whatever Succuponi magic still infested her student, and would also make a lie out of all the promises of sanctuary and vigilance that Celestia had made to the world yesterday. To do the right thing by a pony close to her heart would result in betraying the trust of the world that looked to her as an example of what they should strive towards.

This is just like Luna … but I refuse to allow it to happen again! With Twilight, Luna and Cadence at my side, we can save Sunset, and if the rest of the nations of Equis decide to take umbrage at my focus, then perhaps it is time for me to remind them who is truly the ‘world power’ in this situation.

“Your Radiance.” Simultaneously relieved to be taken out of her depressing spiral of self-recrimination and ashamed that she’d been so lost in her own thoughts, Celestia turned to give the speaker, one of the recently-returned Fourth Circle Magi, an apologetic look … and tried desperately not to giggle as she saw the two burly Thestrals on either side of the open door giving dire looks at the skinny mage, who was turning red for some reason and refusing to meet Celestia’s gaze.

“My apologies, Guards, Magi, I was … distracted by my poor Sunset’s concerns. What need do you have of the Solar Throne?” Celestia threw the beleaguered Magi a life-line in the formal, ritual question, and the young Magi grabbed onto it in earnest.

“My apologies, your Radiance, I did not mean to intrude but my master, Bleak Mountain, wishes to speak to you in regards to the replacement spellwork you wish placed around the castle.”

“Ah, he will want me to key them to my magical frequency. This should take several hours, but Guards, please, if Sunset wakes up, make certain she knows I have taken what she has said to heart and am working on a countermeasure.” Celestia sighed and nodded, thanking the Thestrals as she left the room for their vigilance and then following the flustered Magi through the corridors. Rosebush was right about having to replace our entire magical security system, at least. Over two dozen subversion enchantments slipped into the network and designed to allow an intruder to move through the castle without tripping a single alarm, and hundreds of scrying charms that would broadcast my every movement woven into the castle’s network by other nations in less than a day the moment the castle’s sorcerous defences were compromised, and all of the intrustions we have found have been back-tracked to our allies! I shudder to think of what magical sabotage the Gryphons, Seaponies and Deer might have attempted that we have yet to find.

Yet the risk is well worth the cost. The Changeling Queen who invaded, now suing for peace and has given me the names and locations of her sisters, as well as warning of an invasion from across the Badlands by the ones who created her. A threat we never even dreamed of has been detected long before it could become a disaster, and many of the other nations are, no doubt, simply treating me as they would any other world leader, although I wonder how many of them are sweating buckets right now at the knowledge we found their attempted sabotage within a day and tracked it all back to their doorsteps?

Or at least, Celestia hoped it would be worth the cost. Chrysalis was magically bound to tell the truth, by both Celestia herself and Bleak Mountain, who one of the strongest and most talented sorcerers the world had seen, but there were always work-around to a truth-geas, even with the significant limitations the blood-pact the Changeling Queen had forced on both herself and the ponies of Equestria weighing her down.

But the truly disturbing thought about the Changelings was that they had apparently been in her country for at least sixty years, and whatever threat lurked on the far side of the Badlands, the place where the last of Celestia’s sub-species of ponykind still lingered, according to Discord, had had all that time to build up their forces in preparation for an invasion.

Casting her mind back even as her body mechanically followed the Magi, Celestia turned the conversation over and over, inspecting the memory for any hint of duplicity on the Changeling Queen’s behalf.

“So we will be facing another generation of Changelings?” Celestia had asked, sharing a cup of tea with the convalescing Queen while Discord and Candy Apple had taken off with the foals, or rather, Discord had run off with the foals, all four of them laughing, and Candy Apple was giving chase with a murderous look on her face.

“No, definitely not. The Empress decreed us a flawed generation and sought to wipe all Changelings out of existence, and the Empress has never attempted to fix a flawed generation. Whatever type of creature she produces next will be as different from us as we are from the older generations, and it will take decades for them to establish themselves and even then, there is no guarantee the new generation will be able to breed true, survive contact with the older Generations or be successful enough that the Empress considers useful enough to keep around.” Chrysalis had replied, sipping at her tea delicately, even as the cup clattered slightly as the badly weakened Changeling set the cup back down on the tray balanced on her lap. Her injuries might have been identified, but it did not change the fact that Chrysalis was still horribly injured and would likely remain physically crippled for months at least.

“How … how many generations are there? How many different species are there?” Celestia probed, both fascinated and horrified at the concept of a leader who could not only fleshcraft on such a scale, but possessed the callousness to create such a Darwinian society.

“I know of twelve generations that survived long enough to become an established species in their own right, but only seven still remained when my sisters and I came into existence, making us the ‘eighth’ generation. Each generation is produced with a specific function, a unique purpose in the Empress’s army, and if they fail to uphold that, or possess some other fatal flaw, the older generations will turn on them and annihilate the species from Queen down to Larvae to make room for a new variation for the Empress’s army.” Chrysalis had sighed and leaned back into her pillow, eyes narrowing in anger. “Our role was infiltration and sabotage, to integrate into your society and create weaknesses, to create and exploit vulnerabilities in your military and industry. However, because my generation survived off of psychic energy that we gained through harvesting the emotions of others, our role in the Homeland was that of farmers more often than not, raising the ‘livestock’ and tending to their needs, while the older generations ate the flesh instead.”

“What were the livestock. The way you said that word seemed to suggest something other than the normal fare of carnivorous species.”

“Do you really want me to answer that, Celestia?” Chrysalis’s eyes had opened and locked onto Celestia’s, filled with some strange mixture of regret, anger and … and a deep sorrow?

“I must know.” Celestia had said in return, dreading the answer. Livestock that had emotions could only mean sentient life …

“Ponies, Celestia. A few packs of Diamond Dogs that strayed too far from civilised lands, a colony of Minotaurs descended from slaves taken during their civil war several centuries ago, even a passel of Orcs, but by far the largest number of livestock were Ponies. We kept them safe, stopping the older Generations from stealing the herds out of their fields before the allotted time and preventing the extinction of the species like what had nearly happened shortly before our Generation was born, but our success in those endeavours was due as much to the Empress’s threats of retaliation for their poaching as our Hives defences.” Chrysalis’s voice took on a strained, anguished tone as she spoke. “The livestock knew, of course, their ultimate fate, how could they not when since time beyond memory the older Generations of the Empress’s army had shattered their civilisation and hunted the survivors for food, but under our care, they had a semblance of life, of civilisation. They could raise their children, love each other and enjoy what little time they had because they knew the Changelings would care for them, farm their food, build them shelters, defend them from harm and ensure sure those whose time it was would go to the Culling at peace.”

“The Culling?” Celestia had whispered, both a question and a plea.

“We would use our cocoons to entrap the livestock selected to fulfil the older Queens’ quota, which is how we learned our cocoons could open up the consciousness of non-Changelings to the Hive Mind, and then use our special gift to send them into a pleasant delusion where their fondest dreams were realized, and in the process preserve them until such time as they could be … used by the older Queens’ Hives. We made certain that the delusion would last as long as possible even when removed from the cocoon to try and save the livestock unnecessary suffering, which did not please the older Queens, many of whom preferred their prey screaming for mercy rather than giggling in their sleep.”

Celestia shuddered at the memory and pulled her consciousness back to her immediate surroundings as her Magi escort led her up from the dungeons and towards the less-populated portion of Canterlot Castle, where Bleak Mountain and his Magi dwelled and kept stock of the dangerous magical relics that were unearthed and stored in the safety of Canterlot’s vaults. For all the cruelty and gleeful taunting Chrysalis engaged in when there was an audience, when it was just the two of them, Celestia found herself in the company of a fragile, broken being haunted by the choices she had made and the consequences of those choices. A state of being Celestia herself was all too familiar with.

But if Chrysalis and the other Changeling Queens fled into exile to escape the attempted genocide of their species … then what happened to the ‘livestock’ that lost the protection of the Changeling Hives?"

Chapter 68

CHAPTER 68

Rainbow picked up a shred of Wonderbolt uniform and frowned, half of her wondering what to do with the tatters of cloth, the other half wondering how much a true Wonderbolt’s fan would pay for a piece of cloth that had been intimate with Spitfire’s backside.

“Mother of bucking …” The former owner of said garment cursed from the shower, making Rainbow flinch, then yelp herself as her broken foreleg bumped into a compressed-cloud vanity and flared with pain. “Rainbow? Dammit, rookie, you got any ointment? Your pink friend left teeth-marks when she was ripping my suit off me.”

“I live near the Everfree Forest, I’ve got three first-aid kits, a dozen flare-guns and a stash of all-purpose anti-venom.” Rainbow quipped back, blinking tears out of her eyes as she rubbed at the cast in frustration. “I’ve still got some of Zecora’s salves … uh, are you allergic to onions or parsley, that's the active ingredients in the salves?”

“That’s the zebra shaman, right? And no, not allergic to either of those, but now that you mention it, I am hungry.” Spitfire popped her head around the shower curtain and gave Rainbow a stern look. “And that’s all you’re getting from the zebra, right? No other, ah, herbal remedies?”

“Well, I get muscle ointment, stuff to put through my coat to make it shiny, some other stuff to keep my feathers oiled while I’m flying in the rain …”

“No, rookie, I mean you’re not getting any drugs? No locoweed, no ‘special’ oats?”

“Buck no! I want to join the Wonderbolts and there’s no way that’d happen if I tested positive for anything stronger than birth-control medication! Flames of Tartarus, half of that stuff would probably make me fly slower, if anything!”

“Good. Hate to say it, rookie, but as good as our latest crop of flyers were, we’ll probably have to let more than half of them go if they don’t shape up before the next mustering.” The golden-yellow mare stepped out of Rainbow Dash’s shower, her fur, mane and tail slickly clinging to her athletic frame in a way that made Rainbow’s wings twitch with the urge to unfurl. “Lots of would-be rookies think that if they go for an au-naturale pick-me-up or booster, somehow the drug-squad can’t detect it. And needless to say, a Pony who can pull off a Rainboom at will? Well, rookie, let’s just say you had a lot of nerdy ponies demanding a jar of your piss because they were determined nopony could pull that off without a decade straight of the strongest booster drugs known to equines, and they were determined they were going to prove you were cheating, even if they had to resort to taste-testing.”

Rainbow made a ‘bleaugh’ face at that, to which Spitfire gave a low-pitched laugh. “Don’t let it get to you. Once you make it to the Wonderbolts, weekly urine tests and monthly blood-works are just part of your regular medical routine. Part and parcel of the job, sadly, but we have to prove we’re clean as a whistle or the merchandising and advertising just falls away like leaves in the autumn.”

“Still, kinda gross I had some random stallions going over my pee.” The rainbow-mained pegasus grunted, still disgusted out by the thought.

“You can be grossed out later, I’m ravenous right now. Please, tell me we have something else to eat that isn’t instant food or protein powder?”

“Uh, I wasn’t expecting company, so no, it’s all instant food. We could probably fly down to Ponyville, grab a meal at the Cakes’ bakery and do some proper shopping. If you’re up to it? I mean, getting Pinkie’d is an experience, after all.” Throwing a fluffy towel to Spitfire, Rainbow backed out of the laundry and left it, and the adjoining bathroom, to Spitfire and her wet mane and tail. Stupid sexy Spitfire, but there’s no way I’m going after that. I’m still half-dead below the waist, she’s not here for a hook-up and I am not giving up on Twilight while there’s still a chance I can steal her back from Luna!

“You want me to go back and get molested by that pink demon again?” Spitfire called back, incredulous, from the bathroom.

“No no, the Cakes are good Ponies, and Pinkie tones her shenanigans down when she’s working for them. And considering Pinkie was looking greener than Granny Smith after our little pity-party, I doubt she’ll be working the counter today.” The injured trainee babbled back, slightly horrified at the thought that Spitfire was under the impression that Pinkie was like this all the time.

“And aren’t they directly involved in the incident where you, Applejack, the big slice of yummy that is Applejack’s brother and three underage ponies were all drugged with aphrodisiacs?”

“By accident! And … I kinda wanna go check on them. Yeah, they bucked up, and yeah, I still wanna smack ‘em for what they did, but they’re good Ponies, and this has got to be eating them alive.” Rainbow sighed and looked at her cast. There’s no other way to say this. “And I kinda wanna see if they’ve got any of Rarity’s favourite eclairs. I need to go see her prissiness and make sure she’s doing okay.”

“…Fair enough. Let’s grab a meal, go visit the ex-Bearer and then get some real food stuffed into your pantry.” Spitfire said after a few seconds of silence. “And after we get me settled in here … we start working on the Princess to find my little filly, understand.”

“Ah, yeah, of course Captain, but Twilight’s kinda being hogged by Princess Luna right now. You might have a fight on your hooves.”

“Rookie, I am not going to go in hooves flailing to get what I want. All I am going to do is drop a big old folder of information I’ve gotten over the past decade or so when I lulled the Windstorms into thinking I was dutiful little girl who’d do whatever they said without question, and then I am going to sit back and let her High Brainy-ness tear through the pile until she narrows down the options to the point I can take over again.”

Rainbow stopped and bit her bottom lip in thought. It was true that, if you gave Twilight a puzzle with the right amount of emotional attachment to it, she’d pour all of nerd-powers into the task until it was solved or she hit a mental wall that required group-hug-therapy to knock down. Yet at the same point …

“But didn’t you say that your Aunt had tricked you into signing custody over to her?”

“Yeah, I did. Flurry Windstorm, one of the most evil vultures to ever foul the skies of Cloudsdale and the current head of the Windstorm family. She’s got her hooves in so many dirty pockets I’m surprised the clouds don’t get filthy when she walks on them, and that’s part of the reason I was asked by the Royal Agents to help them bring her down.” Spitfire stopped and gave Rainbow a grin that was all teeth and no mirth, and made Rainbow’s mane want to stand on end from the sheer malice that radiated from it. “That I might get revenge for what she, and the rest of my family, did to me when I was the Crusaders’ age, is just a second bite of the cherry as far as I’m concerned. If we can take down the Windstorms, we'll rip the flank off the Hurricane family, raw and bleeding, and that’ll expose all the dirty laundry that they spend so much bits and break so many wings to keep quiet.”

“Kinda glad Fluttershy got outta there when she did. Kind glad I spent most of my time at Flight-Camp, now that I think about it.” Rainbow muttered as the two pegasus prepared themselves for the glide down to Ponyville, Rainbow in particular taking special care that her house’s windows and doors were locked and warded against intrusion. It wouldn’t stop a determined pegasus from burrowing through the cloud-matter to get inside, but it would stop the casual burglar … or paparazzi snoop.

“You went to Celestia’s Throne-sponsored Flight-Camp, so you were pretty much safe. If you had gone to a Hurricane-sponsored Flight-Camp, with your natural talent and unique colouration, you’d pretty much have been a shoe-in to any one of the ‘private’ groups. You’d be a star athlete … and probably the favoured ‘doll’ of whatever Hurricane scumbag who saw you first.”

“ ‘Doll?’ ”

“It’s the nickname for the unlucky ones who draw the attention of a Hurricane. At best, you’re the best friend of whoever takes you under their wing, but it’s the world’s most lop-sided friendship.” Spitfire explained as the two slowly glided down to Ponyville, the yellow-coated sport-star’s eyes narrowing as several pegasus began to pop out of the clouds or the trees, to follow the two of them. “At worst? Some of the dolls end up spending their lives as just that, dolls, sitting around and being pretty, living adornaments for their patron. It’s awful, but unfortunately, the Royal Guard doesn’t have much traction in Cloudsdale due to the fact the Hurricanes have, by ancient tradition, hoof-picked the police-force for the city. The Ponies in the Cloudsdale Guard do their fair share of guard-duty, but when it comes to the Hurricanes, and those who have the favour of the Hurricanes? The Guards all turn blind, deaf and mute because if they don’t, odds are they’ll lose their jobs at best or their families become next victims at worst.”

“What happened to me was, as awful as it sounds, just another day in Cloudsdale. The Hurricanes have to be stopped, they’re just as bad as the Shadow Court in Canterlot, but since Celestia isn’t looming over their shoulders every second of the day, they’re more open with the shit they pull and can get away with a lot than the Shadow Court can, too.”

Rainbow took a while to digest that thought, thinking of her parents back in Cloudsdale, their little cloud cottage in the back-end of a cul-de-sac on the outskirts of the city. Rainbow hadn’t seen anything like what Spitfire was talking about as a filly, but certain things kept cropping up in her memories.

Bow Hothoof and Windy Whistles whispering to each other in soft voices as they threw away the sponsorship from the Hurricane Academy and started counting up how to raise the bits for a Crown-run Flight-School. The way her parents had always made sure she went to Flight-Camps sponsored by the Princess and made her come straight home to practice her flying in the wild clouds where Cloudsdale’s waste was stored before being transferred to a land-based site. How, despite the fact that both of them were well-paid and respected Cloud Technicians, they chose to live so far from the center of the city, in such a poor neighbourhood, and kept to a small circle of friends who likewise lived on the outskirts of town.

Holy buck. Rainbow thought to herself as she put the pieces together with the information Spitfire had given her. Her parents had exiled themselves to the farthest corners of Cloudsdale, where their training could land them a job, and socked away all their money for Rainbow’s use. She’d not thought anything about it other than frustration that she couldn’t get a new sport’s bag, or the way her mother had always made Rainbow dress in second-hand or non-branded sports-wear. Always making Rainbow look … fat, or slow, or like I came from a poor family. She was making sure I never stood out.She was making sure I wasn’t a target. Mom … Rainbow’s heart clenched as she thought about how many years it had been since she’d even spoked to her parents. She’d moved down to Ponyville to take up the position a friend of her father’s … Holy buck, dad, did you arrange this for me to protect me? ... had arranged with the Ponyville City Council, taken the stash of bits they’d sent her to set up a cloud-house and never looked back at her overly-clingy parents.

And now, with what Spitfire was talking about, it all made so much sense.

It was only when Spitfire jostled Rainbow that the blue pegasus realized they were just a few blocks from the Cake’s shop.

“Seriously, Rookie, what the buck, you’ve been all silent and grim since we left the house. You dreading dealing with your friend that much?” Spitfire’s orange eyes pierced Rainbow, leaving her unable to blink or look away.

“N-no, just what you were saying, I just … just kinda put it together with some stuff from when I was younger, and how my parents, who are the clingiest ponies you can imagine, all but pushed me to Ponyville, which is on the other side of the country, when I started looking for a job after dropping out of school.” Rainbow sighed and rubbed at her head with her unbroken leg as the two pegasus began their descent towards the Cake’s cake-shop. “I think after we get this sorted, I’ve gotta head back up to Cloudsdale and give them a big hug … and try to get them to move down to Ponyville with me.”

“Just make a visit first, Rookie, and then see if they’re willing to move out. Make too big of a fuss, especially with how famous you are, and you can bet your last bit the Hurricanes will take notice of them. If the Hurricanes think you’re vulernable through your parents, they’ll jump on the chance to get a clawhold on the famous Bearer of Loyalty. Faust knows the Royal Agents have had to run themselves ragged protecting your families from everything from con-artists and kooky cults to other nations’ agnets ever since you purified Princess Luna.” Spitfire cautioned as the two pegasus landed and trotted to the entrance of the shop, Spitfire holding the door open for Rainbow, who hobbled in on three limbs. “So this is the famous Sugarcube Corner, huh? Kinda glad we didn’t bring Soarin, we’d be here all day while he sticks his muzzle into every pie they’ve got.”

“Welcome to the Sugarcube Corner, how can we … oh! R-rainbow, and miss Spitfire, uh, h-how can I be of service.” Carrot Cake’s demeanor as he saw the two pegasus walk into his shop changed from bright, bubbly and welcoming to something akin to a pony looking at the headstallion’s chopping block, though thankfully the shop was deserted but for some Royal Guards and Night Guards all sitting huddled at a table with milk-shakes and the remains of what looked like the mother of all cake-binge sessions.

“Just … just checking that you guys are okay, Carrot. Hell of a thing to go through.” Rainbow said, equally nervously and shuffed up to the counter on three limbs. “Uh, would it be alright for us to order a meal, or are we … not welcome? I’d understand, things got real tense back at Twilight’s.”

“What? No! No, of course you’re welcome, all of you, even Rarity … especially Rarity. Poor Cupcake is falling to pieces over what happened, and blames herself that miss Rarity is now, well, no longer part of your exclusive club, shall we say?” Carrot Cake sighed and rubbed at the back of his head with a lanky hoof, giving a wary eye to the knot of Royal and Thestral Guards who were still locked together in some sort of belligerently friendly jock meeting at the furthest table from the serving area. “We’re still not entirely sure what we can do to make up for our part in all of this. I want to just stay out of everypony’s way and keep my head down until we can figure out a way to really make up for this, but Cupcake insists we have to step back into the fray and do something, but she can’t commit to what we’ll be doing beyond the measures that the Princesses levied on us.”

“Oh Faust … Uh, tell Cupcake that it’s not her fault, not really. Twilight thinks that Generosity has been working against Rarity for some time, so when this … stupidity … with Rarity’s pride, that damn cake and my, well, my dumb attack on Rarity to get her back for what happened to the Crusaders all happened at once… it just blew up in all our faces in the worst possible way.” Rainbow muttered, reaching out with a wing to pat the lanky Earth Pony’s shoulder across the counter.

Sighing so heavily that Rainbow was surprised the gangly Stallions’ torso didn’t collapse from a lack of internal pressure, Carrot Cake gave a short, swift nod, then his face smoothed back into it’s usual smiling countenance, but she could see the bags under his eyes, the redness in them from crying and a dozen other small signs of distress. “Well then, let’s get you and miss Spitfire something to eat then. What’ll it be, Rainbow?”

A short deliberation, and an even shorter protest from Carrot Cake that they didn’t have to pay before Rainbow and Spitfire both pointed out that not only was that not what was agreed to by the Princesses’ arbitration, but they weren’t going to allow Carrot Cake to blackmail himself on their behalf, and the two pegasus had seated themselves as far from the knot of Guards as the confines of the bakery would allow to chow down on a massive pile of pastries.

“Seriously, rookie, how much are you worth?” Spitfire grumbled, her tone most certainly not matching the nearly-orgasmic expression on her face as the Wonderbolt Captain nommed her way through a white-chocolate éclair with custard, clotted cream and boysenberry jam. Her fourth one.

“Hmmm … gimme a sec …” Rainbow mumbled around a mouthful of honey-glazed crepe filled with slices of banana, trying to recall the exact numbers before drawing a blank. “Uh, think ‘bout half a million bits, not including my job and the endorsements. Twi’ got me an’ the girls together with her parents’ accountant, got us all involved in some safe, long-term stuff. We’re not hurting for bits, not if we live modestly. I could skip work for a couple of months, easy, if I had to.”

Spitfire gave Rainbow a glare that made the younger mare’s blood run cold.

“Rookie, being worth half a million is a lot more than ‘living modestly’. I’m a Captain of the Wonderbolts, and my annual income is a quarter of a million. And a good deal of that income comes from sponsorships and ad-placements. And I have to pay a premium for where I live in Cloudsdale, even with my family connections, let alone the money I have to spend on personal gear, trainers and health-care to ensure I stay in tip-top shape as the Captain. The average income of a single mare in Equestria is around ten thousand bits, at best.” Spitfire’s eyes narrowed to the point where Rainbow wasn’t sure if her captain had closed her eyes or was just focusing that anger-powered laser glare to a pin-point. “And you are worth half a million or more?”

“Well … we do kinda get rewarded whenever we have to whip out the Elements and save the world?” Rainbow protested, the sweet breakfast suddenly tasting sour on her tongue. “Speaking of which, Applejack finally caved in and accepted she does deserve her share of the reward, so she’ll probably be worth about the same as soon as her letter to Princess Celestia goes through? I know Rarity used her share to pay off her mortgage for her boutique, and Fluttershy doesn’t dip into her share unless she absolutely has to, like when the recent Hydra-spawn outbreak drove a lot of animals out of their homes, so she’s probably worth a bit more with the way that Twilight got our finances sorted.”

“Faust only knows what Pinkie spends hers on, but Twilight was prepared to argue us all into the ground to make sure we didn’t take the money as a lump-sum, but instead put it into fund-management schemes so we’d all get a steady supply of bits for the rest of our lives instead.” The blue pegasus finished as Spitfire just sighed and took another bite of pastry.

“Yeah, I can see her Braininess using that big ol’ forehead of hers in that way. Still, you get a reward for saving the world? It’s not just medals?” The other pegasus asked, putting down her pastry to take a sip of her hot coffee, double creamed no less, and Rainbow jumped on the opportunity to change the subject before her would-be Captain murdered her with a bagel in a fit of jealousy.

“Y-yeah. Because we’re not trained, or a part of Equestria’s military, Princess Celestia pays us a bounty for risking ‘life and limb’ for Equestria, and since the Elements can’t be …” Rainbow stopped and verbally tripped over her thoughts. “… aren’t supposed to leave their Bearer without something terrible happening, she couldn’t just yoink them and hoof them over to the military to use to defend the country. And Twilight explained that if the Elements or the Bearers did come under the direct control of the military, it’d look like we were weaponizing ancient magical relics, which would get all up in the face of some stuffy old treaties we have with the Minotaurs and the Diamond Dogs about using magical thingamabobs above a certain classification or something.”

“You’re talking about the Treaty of the Broken Crowns, the literal benchmark used for every modern-day treaty to prevent the nations of the world from obliterating the face of the planet through escalating magical warfare.” Rubbing a hoof across her nose to dislodge a dollop of cream, Spitfire gave Rainbow a searching look.

“Yeah, that thing.”

Spitfire narrowed her eyes again and glared at Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash gave her best ‘I am totally innocent and have done nothing wrong’ smile.

“Faust damn it, rookie, looks like I know what we’re doing in the six months between now and you moving up into the actual Wonderbolts team.” The yellow-coated Pegasus sighed and snatched up one of Rainbow’s cakes, a strawberry and custard ‘snailshell’-like pastry, and nibbled on it while keeping her laser-like glare focused on Rainbow.

“Uhm … extensive training and bugging Twilight about your, ah, personal mission?”

“Mostly that, but you just gave me a big red flag. We’re going over every major military treaty and protocol until you can recite it all in your sleep before I’ll even consider making you an official Wonderbolt.”

“Auuuuuugh.” Rainbow whimpered, sagging back against the cushioned seat. “Studying. My mortal enemy.”

“Look, Rook … Rainbow, I get it, you’re a do’er, not a think’er. You probably already know this stuff, judging from your scores back at the academy, but you’re both a potential Wonderbolt and a Bearer of the Element of Loyalty. That’s already treading perilously bloody close to a giant screaming violation of the treaties, and I can’t afford to have you causing a world war because you’re too busy obeying the Rule of Kool to think about how many stuffy little bureaucrats you’re shitting all over in the process.”

Rainbow blinked at Spitfire, several times, in rapid succession.

“A world war?”

“Get your noggin’ wrapped around it real quick, Rainbow. You’re are a Bearer. You’re going to be a Wonderbolt. Behind all the fame, the glamour and the bits is the hardest job you’re ever going to do, with more paperwork, red-tape, rules and politics than you ever thought possible.” Spitfire pointed out. “You have no idea how many resources have been spent deflecting attention from you and the rest of the Bearers, how many attempted kidnappings and assassinations we’ve foiled … Rainbow?”

Rainbow’s jaw appeared to have come unhinged on one side, and her pupils shrunk to pinpricks.

Spitfire took a deep breath, centering herself and trying to push down the nagging sense of worry that the Princess’s demands that the Bearers be completely insulated from all potential threats had come back to bite her hard in in the plot, and was about to explain when a large hoof tapped her on the shoulder.

“Pardon me, Captain Spitfire.” The owner of a hoof, a big, beefy Stallion in Royal Guard armor who looked like he ate steroids and shat action movie heroes rumbled at her, the entire knot of Royal and Thestral Guards piled behind him, looking profoundly nervous, which in turn made Spitfire nervous. “Could we, ah, could we speak to miss Rainbow Dash?”

“I ain’t stopping you.” Spitfire said in the calmest tone she could muster, eyeing the beefcake and his buddies warily.

The beefy Stallion blinked, flicking his eyes from Spitfire to Rainbow Dash and back again, sweating bullets in the process, before a Thestral poked him in the flank and hissed something too low-pitched for Spitfire to catch.

“R-right. Uh, Rainbo … miss Rainbow Dash?” The stallion stuttered as Rainbow finally seemed to snap out of her funk and gave her full attention to the Guards just in time for the bombshell to drop.

“Yeah? What?” Rainbow grunted unhelpfully. Okay, so gotta work on her diplomatic skills as well as her knowledge of military law.

“Do you know if Princess Twilight is seeing anypony?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, this is … awkward. Twilight ‘thought’ out loud in the ‘clearing’ in her mind, fashioned around pleasant memories of the weekly pet-picnics she and her friends had been having up until Twilight’s unwanted transformation from Unicorn into Finger-Puppet-For-Eldritch-Monstrosities had turned her life upside down … and Luna and Magic were quickly ruining those memories even faster than Twilight’s guilt and paranoia could have hoped to accomplish with their shenanigans, as the torn-up grass and knocked-over trees could attest.

Unhoof me, you fleshy …

Nay! It has been millennia since we last met, and I will have answers, Magic! Luna ‘shouted’ uncomfortably loud as her astral form grappled with the complex geometric shape that Magic had provided as a ‘physical’ representation of itself, the two of them rolling around the clearing in a tangle as the Princess of the Night vented most mightily on the Element. Did you know that I would fall to corruption? Did you sit back and watch it happen, after all we had been through together? Were you ordered to do nothing to save me from that nightmare? A thousand years, trapped in my own mind with that howling obscenity clawing at my very identity relentlessly, and I still do not know if you could have spared me that travesty!

I am not allowed to answer any of those question, and you know that! Let go of me, your actions are entirely unbefitting of an Immortal! Magic ‘yowled’, as that was the only word Twilight’s understandably stressed mind could use to describe the sheer outrage and dismay that radiated off the Element as giant form of Luna’s astral body all but wrapped itself around the geometric and decidedly inorganic form of Magic, the Element constantly reshaping itself into ever increasingly point-covered shapes as Luna batted it back and forth with her giant hooves or set it spinning with a powerful flick of her flowing mane or tail. Pillar, Twilight, please call off your rutting partner!

Marefriend. Twilight shot back, feeling oddly vindicated to see the dirty little voyeur that had been living in her head for all these years get some vigorous comeuppance.

Lover! Luna shouted at the same time, flattening the grass around her in the process and causing Magic to assume a nearly wafer-like appearance before it began folding up and out into something more akin to an eight-sided box made of interlocking square frames.

I do not care what term fleshies use to describe your pointless coupling! You are both female, you cannot reproduce with one another no matter how hard you two rub against one another, the act is a pointless waste of time and resources! Magic spluttered, struggling in vain against Luna’s assault. Dreamer! Did you come to be an emotional support for the Pillar or did you come to assault me?

BOTH! Luna roared, smushing Magic against the ‘floor’ and back into it’s ‘wafer’ form with the force of her words. In the thousand years since I last saw you, Magic, your indifference towards organic life appears to have soured into outright contempt, and that is a development I cannot ignore when I also think of what Generosity has done to Lady Rarity! Putting aside my own quarrel with you, your actions towards Twilight are nothing short of disturbing!

I … have to agree with Luna here, Magic. You’ve been in my head for years now, watching everything I do, possibly knowing everything I’ve thought. That’s a grotesque violation of my privacy at the very least!

It has not been a picnic for me either, Bearer! All of those disgustingly biological actions you do, all day, every day, your revolting mating urges during the spring months, the way yo-DREAMER, IF YOU DO NOT STOP THAT I WILL TELL MY MOTHER![/b]

Oh, please do, I can’t wait to watch the fire-works when the Mother of Stones hears all about the failure of Generosity and how her ‘favoured’ child turned out to be a dirty, bigoted voyeur.

To be classed as a voyeur, I would have had to have enjoyed what I have seen!

Oh stick a sock in it, old bean, you’re a dirty voyeur and you know it.

Luna’s giant head, and Twilight’s normal-sized one, both swivelled to stare at the new voice, a stocky-looking pony of middling age, wearing a rather familiar-looking Stetson hat, a pink shirt and washed-out blue pair of overalls, with a coal-grey mane and tail, and a cutie mark that looked something like an acorn surrounded by several different types of seed.

I know that voice … Honesty? Luna’s voice shifted from the angry tone she had been using to interrogate Magic to one of wonder and pain, and her luminous ever-flowing mane reached out, halting and pausing at turns, to touch the newcomer, as if to test that he was actually there.

In the astral essence, dear one. My siblings and I heard Magic’s squawking …

I DID NOT SQUAWK! Now stop that and get her off me, the Dreamer is a lot heavier in the Astral Plane than she looks!

… And since my Bearer is currently in the middle of an adorable little scenario involving her friends, her brother and a pair of charming stallions, I decided to pop over and see what all the high-pitched squealing was about and leave the other Elements to stand watch over our Bearers. The Stallion reached out to nuzzle Luna’s mane, and laughed, a warm, deep noise that immediately made Twilight think of her own father for a few moments as Luna’s mane wrapped around him and dragged him up against Luna’s giant neck in some sort of strange hug.

Magic reformed into an abstract crystalline object whose meaning escaped Twilight, but apparently meant something extraordinarily offensive given how Luna paled and Honesty guffawed again.

Cute, little brother, but we both know you don’t have the stones to make good on that threat.

DID YOU JUST GENDER ME?

Okay, ignoring the Drama Queen-

YOU DID IT AGAIN! IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION THIS TIME!

-Drama Queen, Princess Twilight, first of all it is a great pleasure to finally speak to you. On behalf of my siblings, the ones who don’t have gravel for brains at least, I apologise for the subterfuge. We have our orders, and I believe that our little Dreamer here has informed you of the broadest gist of why this is so?

The Powers?I’m … both very interested to meet them and give them a piece of my mind, and very concerned I might cause the apocalypse if I do so. Twilight replied, still feeling very off-center from the sudden appearance of another Element of Harmony in her head. At least this one was more pleasant than Magic and less destructive than Generosity seemed to be. Wait! If you’re here, what about Applejack? Plese, tell me you didn’t abandon her …

I would never abandon my sweet lil’ Jackie, don’t you fret about that. Unlike some stones, I don’t ditch my duty when it gets tough, and besides, I’d sooner turn to dust that walk out on the family. And don’t worry about upsetting the Powers, they’re very understanding … well, more like they’re more accommodating than you’d expect. You’d have to threaten to blow up a good chunk of creation, at least a galaxy or two, to make them actually upset with you. Honesty tipped his hat at Twilight and grinned, a broad, friendly smile that immediately made Twilight now think of Big Mac’s rare smile that could reduce a room of Mares to weak-kneed wrecks. You’ve been picked to be an Immortal, m’dear, and the Powersdon’t make that choice lightly. You’d have to become the Arch-Fiend herself to make them think less of you.

The fact that Honesty refered to Applejack’s family as ‘the family’, and the very ‘agricultural’ theme of his appearance, made Twilight’s head itch in the way that only happened when she knew she was missing some sort of clue that would bring her research together, and it was right in-front of her, but the chaos of the situation stole any hope of putting it together away from her hooves.

At least the nagging worry that complaining about being picked for an endless duty without being asked first might cause the end of all things had been assuaged.

Okay, there’s a lot I need to ask, but first of all … do you know if whatever Generosity has done to Rarity can be fixed?

Ah. Honesty said, his smile fading into a tight grimace. As near as we’ve been able to tell, Generosity has been suppressing the young miss’s positive traits and enhancing her negative ones, the exact opposite of what it’s supposed to have been doing. And given that the two had a very strong resonance with one another, we’re afraid if we try to fix the damage, we’d simply make matters worse. And since we don’t know if Generosity has left any … supernatural … surprises in her mind, we’re even more afraid that diving into Rarity’s mind might trigger something worse than that nasty little episode she had.

All the other Elements can come up with is helping miss Rarity recover the mortal way, with therapy and the support of her friends, at least until our mother shows up. Honesty gave a small smirk as he looked down at Magic’s ever-changing form. Of course, somestone has to actually make sure she gets the call, doesn’t she?

Luna and Twilight turned their gaze to Magic, who had assumed the form of a Mobius strip that spun faster and faster as the two Alicorns looks turned from merely expectant to angry.

She’s deep in meditation! I can’t just disrupt her for one mortal, especially a mortal who isn’t important to the Plan anymore!

Translation for my lazy, voyeuristic brother: I can’t be arsed getting over my distaste for the ‘fleshies’ to go and wake up our mother, who is well over-due and should have been roused over a decade ago. Honesty smirked as Magic flailed into several different abstract forms as Luna and Twilight’s glares turned positively molten in their intensities. Incidentally, the Hope-Bringer’s agenda to save you, Dreamer, involved having the Mother of Stones on standby to help contain you if the Elements proved incapable of purifying you, so that the Hope-Bringer could evacuate the Bearers and then return to fight you herself. Needless to say, we were all very relieved to find the Bearers were more than up to the task … and very disturbed to find that the Mother of Stones hadn’t been woken on schedule, but given the way that the Elements work, we couldn’t directly send a message without diverting a great deal of the Elements’ power from the very necessary task at hoof.

Do not try to pin that on me, you ugly piece of gravel! She ignored every message I sent and refused to wake up. Magic shot back, radiating annoyance at it’s sibling as Luna and Twilight backed off slightly to keep their attention split between the two Elements.

Oh, and how many messages did you send? How hard did you actually try to wake the Mother of Stones? Honesty asked, and Magic merely tucked itself into a small cube the size of a sugar-cube, presumably sulking. Yes, I’ll just bet you did the bare minimum to satisfy the Hope-Bringer’s request and not an iota of power more, and no follow-ups, just like always. You, of all of us, know how deeply the Mother of Stones sleeps, and that nothing short of the full scope of your power could even hope to wake her.

She was nurturing our new siblings. We were destined to elevate the Pillar, regardless of what happened to the other Bearers, and the Dreamer would have been purified if the Hope-Bearer slew her corporeal form and the Dreamer’s spirit was drawn down to Tartarus, where the Nightmare Spirit would have been unable to follow! Magic snapped, developing serrations on the edges of it’s cube-like form. The Hope-Bearer’s pointless sentimentality could have risked a whole generation of our kind, several centuries of brooding of the Mother of Stones gone to waste!

Our new siblings are not nearly so vulnerable that a few years without an Elder overseeing their crystallization would do them harm, and there’s thousands of our siblings who could easily look after them for a century or two if the Mother of Stones needed to step out to aid our friends. Honesty’s pony-face turned into a foul scowl as it glared down at Magic. Between your bigotry and Generosity’s betrayal, I am surprised the Powers themselves haven’t made their displeasure known. Do you want to be unmade?

I would like to know why you were willing to risk my being trapped in Tartarus for years while I worked my way up through the levels to the entrance to the mortal realm, Magic, after all the long millennia we shared together as friends and partners! Luna snarled, her mane coiling threateningly above Magic’s cube-form, her expression one of fury incarnate as the serated edges of Magic’s cube-form became noticeably more pronounced. You gambled the lives of the Bearers, and the possibility that Celestia would mis-step, against the possibility I would over-power her and condemn our entire world to countless years of unnatural darkness? Millions would have died, entire ecosystems would have collapsed and with control over both the Sun and the Moon, I would have been unstoppable, even to the Parliament of Immortals!

And so? Have you forgotten what the Tree has done to our people? The countless lives lost to their roots, our kin slowly broken down from mighty rocks to mere sand by their relentless hunger for soil! Magic raged, swelling in size, the serrated edges of it’s cube-form beginning to grow into actual spikes. YOU BUILT YOUR DAMN CAPITAL IN THE MIDDLE OF A FOREST. Did you even think what that felt like for us? To be surrounded by our natural predators, to have our beloved Bearers adorning a castle of stone, metal and glass of incomparable beauty with fucking greenery?You might be Immortals, but you don’t give a damn about the Earth Elementals, only your precious fleshies, only their needs, never ours! I was given unlimited access to the fundamental forces of Creation itself, and then I end up surrounded by the mortal enemy of my very species and forced by that same power to just sit there like a good boulder and watch as those monstrous plants devoured my kin left and right!

That is enough! You know the Immortals are forbidden from interfering with the conflict between the Elementals! Our war with the Children of the Tree, and their war with the Children of the Eternal Flame, is not an issue they are permitted to be involved in. Honesty snapped, blurring forwards and kicking Magic out of range of Luna with a sound not unlike two heavy stones smashing together … which, Twilight’s mind distractedly realized, was probably what happened as Magic went spinning across the ‘field’ to dig a distressingly massive gouge through the earth before coming to rest. Celestia and Luna needed to make the Castle of the Two Princesses appealing to their mortal followers, and that necessitated parks and greenery. And they took special care to ensure that the Children were kept as separate from each other as physically possible. No Child of Stone was ever used as a building material, left in a garden or park nor broken by hoof or tool, no Child of Wood was ever chopped up as firewood, used as building materials or needlessly displaced from their home, none of the Children were ever put in harms way under their care, either from our eternal Wars or the machinations of Mortal sorcerers.

Speaking of which, the rest of the Elements decided to contact our Mother shortly after Generosity pulled it’s evil little stunt, and she’s on her way, Magic. As in, right now. Honesty sneered as Magic grew tendrils of crystal and pulled itself, now in the form of a rough geode of amethyst, out of the trench it had gouged into the earth. So I’d advise you to stow the sass, get back in the game and prepare to have chips knocked off you for the shit that has gone down under your command, such as it is.

Impossible, the Mother takes decades to wake up.

Not when somestone decides to throw all their power into the message, like you were supposed to. I’m surprised you didn’t hear about the earthquakes in Down Unda when she heard about how Generosity has subverted it’s purpose, and how you have been playing dumb with your orders.

Luna’s mane snuck out as Honesty and Magic sniped at each other, gathering Twilight and gently dragging the dumb-struck Mare to Luna’s side, an errant strand pushing Twilight’s jaw up as the Alicorn of Magic watched the squabbling in shock.

Are the Elements supposed to act like this? Twilight ‘whispered’ to Luna as Honesty and Magic began trading ever more vicious barbs.

Nay. I begin to think that Magic, as well as Generosity, might be rebelling against their purpose. Luna ‘whispered’ back, lowering her massive head to be right next to Twilight’s entrapped body. I remember Magic being far more friendly and witty than this, and that is including our little spat earlier. As you may remember, back before my corruption, I often spent the nights of my youth alone in a castle devoid of petitioners, who preferred to wait upon my sister, or prowled the borders alone, but for the presence of Kindness, Honesty and Magic within my mind, defending our peoples against raiders and monsters of both mundane and magical varieties.

So Magic has turned hellishly bitter after being left in the Everfree Forest for a thousand years?

That does not sound … right. The physical vessels you found in the Everfree are not the Elements only corporeal vessels, simply the ones that my sister and I used as focuses. We had seen the Elements of Harmony take on other physical forms while leaving the vessels we took from the Tree of Harmony, but perhaps … Luna was cut off as Magic tottered over to Honesty on long, crystalline tendrils, poking repeatedly at the ‘pony’ with sharp tendrils as their shouting match grew louder and louder. At the very least, Twilight, if the Mother of Stones has been woken up, this will be resolved very shortly. She’s very slow to move, but when she does, it is all but impossible to get the Mother of Stones to stop.

Terrific. So how badly are my friends and I going to get mangled by all this?

In all honesty, pardon the pun, I doubt our Mother will do anything that could cause any of you any more distress than you’re currently dealing with. Honesty whispered, and both Ponies flinched, looking from the small, acorn-sized cluster of raw ametrine floating between their heads to the ‘pony’ that was currently engaged in some bizarre slap-fight with the betentacled form of Magic. Apologies for the deception, but I want a chance to talk with you two privately without Magic throwing a wrench into things. And yes, Princess Luna was correct that we were not bound to the Elements per-say, but we weren’t able to use the energies the Powers granted us without imbuing our spirits into those vessels.

I suspected, but … I did not wish to pry, and I remember Generosity being very upset about the nature of the Element it occupied, the fact that it was merely a coloured stone orb. Luna whispered back, shooting a nervous glance at the two figures fighting and slowly drifting away from her and Twilight, before leaning down to nuzzle the floating gemstone. And it is so very good to see you again, old friend. I missed you.

And I you, my dear little filly. Thankfully, once the Pillar, ah, sorry, Twilight Sparkle, ascends, our long duty will be over and I will be freed to go as I please. Would you object if I … remained in Ponyville? I have some family obligations to take care of. Humming softly, the gemstone rubbed left and right against Luna’s muzzle, a gesture of affection Twilight assumed, before it pulled away to remain hovering between the two Ponies.

I cannot see why not, and I know Celestia will be deliriously happy to hear you’re remaining close by. You’ll probably have to fend her off with a stick when she realizes you and the other Elementals are freed from the Elements and can be your own beings again.

We’ll have to make it a party. I can’t wait to see Celestia dancing like a klutz again, but sadly, we have business to attend to first. Twilight, I must apologise that this is all happening. Generosity will be punished severely, and I assure you Magic is going to get a healthy heaping of humility in … oh dear me, tomorrow. The gem-cluster froze and began wobbling in a most erratic fashion. Oh horseapples, uh, Luna, can you possibly arrange for all the dear little ponies who have been carrying us to get to Canterlot before tomorrow morning? The Mother of Stones is coming faster than I anticipated and she just informed me that she wants everything involved, Elements and Ponies alike, in the one place.

But Rarity is still injured. Twilight protested, flinching as loud banging noises erupted between the pony-body of Honesty and whatever geometric tentacle beast Magic was morphing into, their slap-fight turning vicious. And I am not sure the others can just up and abandon their duties.

Twilight, if the Mother of Stones is coming, we have to go. She’s very old and will be take offence if she’s roused like this and we don’t make the effort to help her. Besides, apart from Applejack’s farm and Fluttershy’s animals, both of whom other can deal with for at least one day, nopony is really dealing with anything truly requiring their attendance. My Thestrals and the Royal Guards can assist Big Mac with Sweet Apple Acres, and making sure the Crusaders tend to Fluttershy’s animals should solve two issues at once. Luna said, her face splitting into a devious smile at her own words. Tending to the bunnies should tired them out enough to stop them from mating like bunnies.

Eww ewww ewwwwww, I do not want to think about that, bleh. Twilight protested, but giggled herself. But what do we do about Magic and Generosity? They’re both in my head right now, and Magic is causing a number of concerns for me right now, with how it can read my mind and just disappear from my senses at a whim.

It can what? Hold that thought for just a moment. Honesty replied, floating over to touch itself to Twilight’s horn, and there was an ear-splitting shriek of dismay from Magic, and a sense of sudden aloneness that rushed through Twilight’s being, as a spark of rainbow magic surged between the gemcluster and Twilight’s horn. I had thought there was something odd about your connection to Magic. Looks like Generosity wasn’t the only one playing fast and loose with their Bearer.

Before their eyes, Magic came flailing towards them, sharp tentacles digging into the earth to propel the rapidly-changing geometric ‘core’ of the Element towards the Ponies, but with each passing second, the Element shrank drastically in size, before falling to the ground and rolling to a stop just short of Luna’s giant-sized hooves, a single, perfectly octrahedronal crystal of amethyst the size of a apricot that buzzed and vibrated like an angry hive of bees on the grass.

I can’t actually remove Magic or Generosity, I only have the backing of three other Elements, but since both Generosity has openly defied the Powers, and Magic is perilously close to doing so, their connection to the Powers has significantly weakened. My barrier should keep them sealed up and away from your mind for at least a few days, and that will be more than long enough for the Mother of Stones to safely remove them and sort this all out. Honesty sighed, hovering down and away until it floated just over Magic, which seemed to be trying to roll towards Twilight, but was unable to gain any traction with it’s perfectly smooth facets. Now, I would suggest we get a move on and rally the other Bearers. The sooner we can get this all sorted, the safe you all will be.

Hooooh boy, once more, into the breech. Twilight said dryly as the world around them began to twist and dissolve, Luna’s astral plane slowly bleeding away into the real world.

If it is any consolation, none of you did anything wrong, this is all Generosity and Magic’s fault. Honesty said, his voice slowly losing strength as the dreamworld faded away. Oh, and if you could please bring some lamingtons? The Mother of Stones adores them …

Blinking slowly and feeling oddly refreshed despite the strange sense of isolation flowing through her, Twilight lifted her head and found herself staring into Trixie’s own eyes, the blue unicorn wearing a maid’s outfit that the newest Alicorn was certain served mostly for fetish and had little useful function.

“Aaa-aaah, Mistress Twilight, are you alright? You and Princess Luna have been unconscious for a good five hours!”

“That long?” Twilight grunted, quickly casting a spell on herself to check for foreign magic … as much to see what it was that Honesty had done as to make sure that Trixie hadn’t pulled a fast one while both Princesses were unconscious.

“Time moves differently in the Astral Plane. A few hours can pass like a minute, or the reverse can happen. I suspect that Magic may have been abusing it’s connection to the fundamental forces to stretch out the time we spent in the Astral Plane for some gambit of it’s own. We may own Honesty a far larger debt than we realize.” Stretching and yawning, Luna unfolded her wing from Twilight’s back and stood up with several loud cracking noises, while Twilight breathed a sigh of relief as her detection spell came back clean. Not becoming a succuponi today, at least.

After a short discussion with Spike and the Crusaders about what was happening, which warranted much cheering from the Crusaders about becoming Cutiemark Crusader Petsitters, and a shorter talk with Trixie about personal space when Ponies were sleeping which involved much blushing from both parties involved, the two Princesses paused at the doorway, peering out the small glass window where the street seemed deserted of reporters for the moment.

“So … I fly to east side of town and inform Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy of what is happening, and you will go to the west side, and speak to Pinkie Pie and Rarity?” Luna said, eying the trash-cans and trees nervously. Canterlot paparazzi could almost boast Pinkie-levels of hiding in plain site, after all.

“And then I’ve got to head over to the school-house to inform Cherilee that the Crusaders won’t be coming back to school for a few more weeks, at least. I’ll need to arrange a lesson-plan to make sure they don’t slip behind on their grades, and I need to talk to Cherilee about … a couple of things.” Twilight sighed heavily and leaned against Luna for a few seconds. “I want to help Spike out, so I’m going to see if I can arrange to tutor Snips and Snails to bring their grades up, so all three of them can spend more time together, and I need to … apologise … for missing all those signals she was sending.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me around? You are not experienced in these matters, after all.” Luna asked softly, her voice rich with concern.

“I do, but I also have to learn to do this on my own, and Cherilee is also a very mature and thoughtful pony. I doubt she’ll do anything like what the Spa Twins pulled, and I can’t very well keep avoiding her if we’re going to do the right thing by the Crusaders, and Spike for that matter.” Nuzzling the side of Luna’s neck, Twilight took a deep, shuddering breath and put a hoof on the door-knob. “Okay, so, go and hope Rarity is willing to be civil to the rest of our friends on a five-hour train-ride to Canterlot and not turn into a raging drama-llama while in a city full of opportunistic vultures, deal with a Mare who tried to seduce me with an afterschool teacher-student play, arrange for all my friends to go meet some all-powerful Elemental mother and deal with two out of six Elements who have gone rogue and are currently trapped in my noggin. Just another day in Ponyville …”

Twilight opened the door and triggered her invisibility spell, dashing over the grass and leaping the fence as hordes of reporters came screaming out from behind trees, dumpster and alleyways with their cameras flashing and recorders rolling, while Luna blinked, smiled and took to the skies, drawing many of the reporters with her since Twilight had vanished from sight, and Spike merely shook his head, chuckled and shut the door before a reporter decided to risk their equipment and charge into the library.

“Admit it, Twi.” Spike muttered as the door latched shut. “You wouldn’t trade this for the world.”

Chapter 69

Celestia stared at the leader of her Magi.

It wasn’t an angry stare, or a disappointed one. It didn’t hold traces of fear or frustration, and not a speck of regret.

It was simply a stare, yet it came with the weight of an Immortal with thousands of years of practice at making just a simple stare feel it was crushing oneself. A blank, expressionless stare at Bleak Mountain, the stoic, runic-tattoo covered Unicorn shifting awkwardly from hoof to hoof under the intense pressure of Celestia’s complete, emotionless attention.

“Forgive my bluntness, by really?” Acting Royal Captain Dawn Ray grated, being perfectly mortal and more than willing to vent naturally at the leader of the Equestrian Magi. “You want to torture Sunset Shimmer to make certain she’s telling the truth, and that this isn’t some labyrinthian Tartarian plot to unleash the Succuponies on Equestria once again?”

“I understand your concerns, but are we really trusting Sunset Shimmer, of all Ponies, on this matter? She is arrogant, bigoted, recklessly self-impressed and has already attempted to usurp Princess Twilight’s role as the Bearer of Magic.” The stocky, stoic stallion said in a relatively calm tone, but Celestia could see the sweat beading under his fur and along the edges of his glittering tattoos, Neighponese runes that looked like shimmering gold and silver scars that peeked out from under his coat, hear the slight hitch in his voice that a less-experienced leader might have missed. “And now she’s been physically altered by the denizens of Tartarus. Is it truly so unlikely that they have not also taken advantage of her massive character flaws to also alter her spiritually? For all we know, the Succuponies are actually about to invade our world directly, and this … story … about trying to infest another world with our magic to make some sort of bald apes into living batteries seems incredibly far-fetched.”

Celestia raised a hoof as Dawn took a step towards the Magi, who in turn glared at the aging veteran, the five golden rings on Bleak Mountain’s horn slowly spinning around the Magi’s horn, each representing mastery of a different field of magic and each possessing several potent sorcerous abilities in their own right.

As much as she would have enjoyed seeing Bleak Mountain getting curb-stomped hard enough to knock the stick out of his plot and the chips off his shoulders, she needed Dawn Ray alive to be the Acting Captain, and the ‘imported’ Magi from Neighpone had gotten his job by being very good at casting combat spells, after all. Not enough, possibly, to keep the veteran from literally handing Bleak Mountain his own plot, but enough that Celestia would be down two of her best soldiers right when Equestria needed all the stability it could muster.

“Yes, Mountain, we are trusting her. If I ignored the advice of everypony who disappointed me or let me down, I’d be ignoring most of the planet by now.” Celestia said in a calm, even tone, letting her rage at her Magi’s words remain buried deep under the shell of Princess. “More importantly, many of the defences built into Tartarus were put in place by older Immortals than I, including the Platinum King, the Chromatic Queen and the Forge Master himself. However much we might wish to believe that Sunset was just babbling some sort of fever-dream nonsense, several things she said during her brief period of consciousness match up too closely to some of the most guarded secrets in the world, and thus are too important to ignore.”

“Before he left to oversee a mission of importance on the other side of the world, Starswirl the Bearded sealed away three evil hippocampi sorceresses called the Sirens in the same alternate reality that Sunset Shimmer found herself trapped in. The Sirens were infamous for their mastery of audial magic, focused through three very powerful soul-rubies that they wore as necklaces. Red gems, the size of my hoof, that the Sirens were able to use to hypnotize entire cities, forcing the citizens to fight one another while the Sirens would feast on the unleashed rage and fury to empower themselves further and then move on to their next meal, leaving several realms ruined beyond repair in their wake. And Sunset mentioned them despite the fact that the Legend of the Sirens is known only to a few scholars, and even then is often disputed as a parable rather than an actual event by our oh-so-self-impressed ‘modern’ scholars.” Celestia continued, glaring at Bleak Mountain, who was now visibly sweating at Celestia’s displeasure focused entirely upon him. “She also mentioned that the Succuponies had realized that Tartarus’s magical defences only protected Equestria from a direct invasion, not an indirect one, a flaw that only I and several other Immortals are aware of, and none of us have ever admitted to this flaw to any mortals, for obvious reasons.”

“That still does not invalidate the theory that Sunset Shimmer is a plant for the Succuponi to distract us from their true agenda.” Bleak Mountain said, narrowing his eyes as Captain of the Royal Guard’s glare turned into a disdainful sneer.

The Solar Princess lowered her hoof was she was certain the two Stallions weren’t going to leap at each other and start fighting. Bleak Mountain’s long history of snubbing Ponies who didn’t possess the kind of natural magical talent that got one recruited for the Magi had long rubbed the other military leaders of Equestria the wrong way, and Dawn Ray in particular apparently, but this wasn’t the time to indulge in letting her underlings vent, then manipulate them into becoming fast friends. “If you truly understood the mechanics of the Demi-Plane of Tartarus, you would understand how flawed your theory truly is, Bleak Mountain. Once I had the time to open a communication spell to the Halls of Judgement, I alerted Gothica and then the other Immortals who are responsible for the mystical defences of Tartarus of the potential danger, and they immediately began investigating for interplanar and extra-planar breaches that would allow just such an event to occur.”

“They found no less than sixteen breaches to an equal number of worlds and alternate realities in one of the minor wings of the Prison-Plane, and Gothica dispatched several warbands of Reapers, Erinyes and even some of her Bargemen to recapture the escapees, most of whom were mortal sorcerers or tyrants who, through some twist of fate, were summoned to other worlds from Tartarus, rather than escaping themselves. In the short space of time between my informing Gothica of the news, and our meeting now, fourteen of the escapees have already been reaped and returned to their cells with even greater bindings upon them now than ever, and their Summoners have been slain and sent to their own Hells for judgement.” The Solar Princess continued, taking a grim pleasure in the way Bleak Mountain’s eyes visibly widened at this knowledge. Yes, my ‘loyal’ Magi, your much-admired collection of forbidden knowledge regarding the Lower Planes isn’t nearly as comprehensive as you’d hoped. And the many denizens who attempted to become Immortals through force or through dark magic are protected now by lethal force and even stronger bindings of new design, which means your little experiments with attempting to commune with the prisoners of Tartarus will continue to fail, and you dreams of forcing an Ascension upon yourself will remain simple fantasies. “Thankfully, the boundaries around the actual Fiendish areas of Tartarus are still untouched, and already Hephaestus and the Chromatic Queen are hard at work reinforcing the barriers to protect against such external meddling in the future. If the Succuponi truly did intend to subvert Tartarus’s defences through using another world, they will be sorely disappointed when their sorcery rebounds on them in a most punitive fashion.”

“So you see, Mountain, we are indeed able to trust Sunset, and once she is well enough to survive another purification ritual, I suspect she will not only be restored to mortality, but be more than changed not only by her experiences, but by the lessons Twilight imparted to her during their time together on the other world.”

Bleak Mountain turned his gaze from his glaring contest with Dawn Ray back to Celestia, his face going through what appeared to be a spasm as the tattooed neighponese Stallion fought to keep his expression calm and serene in-front of his Princess. To a mortal leader, his true feelings would be nearly-unreadable, but Celestia had had millennia of practice, and could read the fear, the doubt, and the rage that simmered under that paper-thin façade as easily as the headlines on the front-page of a Canterlot newspaper.

When she had ‘accepted’ Bleak Mountain as one of her Magi, Celestia had already known that the ambitious young Unicorn, with his studies into Internal Alchemy and a leaning towards magic that was already considered dubious even by the intrigue-riddled courts of Neighpone, was too dangerous to be left alone, that his ‘employment’ under her was merely a polite way of keeping a very dangerous and driven individual under close scrutiny.

No doubt Bleak Mountain’s ego had assured him that Celestia, the very ‘Goddess’ whom his people worshipped slavishly, had picked him for some greater destiny, and Celestia had spent a good deal of effort subtly deflecting the stallion’s less-than-romantic attempts to woo her, knowing that Bleak Mountain had only been after the authority of becoming the Royal Consort and the narcassitic appeal of bedding a goddess. Instead of becoming a God, Bleak Mountain had been tricked into becoming Celestia’s magical errand boy and being shackled by duty and sorcerous bindings strong enough to slow the drift of small continents, which had probably been a very rude shock to the arrogant sorcerer who had long ago become accustomed to being untouchably powerful back in his homeland.

Manipulating the powerful and deceptive Magi into serving an actually noble purpose in life for the past sixty years had been difficult, but Celestia’s skin crawled at the thought of what Bleak Mountain, with his towering intellect, ruthless ambition, domineering charisma and a prodigiously deep well of personal magic power, could have achieved if left uncontrolled in the chaotic maelstrom that was Neighpone’s political scene during that period of time. He’d probably be ruling the nation and using the current Empress as a hoof-puppet to gather whatever resources he needed for his experiments as the Empire crumbled around him, at best. At worst, I’d be dealing with another Sombra...

And whatever she might have felt about the other nations of equine-kind across the world, their policies, their societies and their baseless usurpations of her name and authority to justify their actions, they were still her people, and she their Immortal. They were her responsibility, and where-ever she could, Celestia would try to turn Ponies like Bleak Mountain to a better destiny than the ones their selfish ambitions drew them towards. Most of the time, Celestia’s schemes resulted in success, and the Ponies she drew to her grew into heroes and beloved champions that in turn would possess the necessary qualities, and a ingrained need to help others as they had been helped, to in turn inspire generations of their people towards more lofty goals, but Bleak Mountain’s lust for power stubbornly refused to yield to his need to be accepted …

“As my advice is no longer needed, your Radiance, may I withdraw? There are many more magical matters to deal with before the day is done.” Stoic Mountain said in a voice just shy of respectful, and Celestia waved him away, giving Dawn Ray a look of her own as the loyal Guard bristled at the Magi.

“As you will, Bleak Mountain, but I will insist that you leave Sunset Shimmer alone. The Fourth Circle Magi will be sufficient guardians over both my former student, and the mare she partially infected.” Celestia tried to throw a bone to Bleak Mountain’s ego in the hope of placating him, but noticed how the Magi’s eyes were boring holes in the air above her head. The peace offering was being rejected, again. “I want your efforts focused entirely on mapping Queen Chrysalis’s body, down to her smallest artery, vein and nerve-ending. You will be assigned two members of the Fourth Circle to assist you and take exhaustive notes on everything you discover, and all three of you are to glean every possible secret you can from the Changeling Queen without doing her any harm that could cause the blood-pact to activate and rebound on you. We cannot leave a single clue to the identity of the Changelings’ creator up to chance, not if we are to protect the world from an ‘Empress’ capable of flesh-crafting on a scale this advanced, this terrible.”

“Is that all, your Radiance?” The leader of the Magi asked, still staring holes above Celestia’s head.

Sighing heavily, Celestia nodded and said nothing else as the Magi stalked out, then lowered her head to the table and began banging her muzzle on the polished oak surface in frustration once she was certain the proud Neighponese stallion was far enough away to not hear the loud thumping.

“Princess Celestia, forgive me for speaking out of turn, put perhaps it is time to find a new leader for your Magi? Bleak Mountain talks a lot about other Ponies’ disrespect, but it is well known that he’s just shy of openly rebellious towards you and your sister when he’s amongst his Magi subordinates.” Dawn Ray grumbled, rocking back and forth on his hooves as he waited for his monarch to finish her most undignified actions. “For all his talent and raw power, Bleak Mountain is as much a danger to Equestria with his selfish pursuit of magical knowledge at all costs as, well, Discord himself used to be.”

“Thankfully, there are multiple individuals amongst the Fourth Circle who could step up should I need to remove Bleak Mountain immediately, much as you were able to replace Captain Rosebush, but for now I need Bleak Mountain where he is … specifically under my watchful eyes and bound by the blood-oath he swore to do nothing that can cause harm to Equis or the beings who live upon it.” Giving the veteran a weak smile, Celestia sat back up in her well-padded chair and stretched her neck left and right, grimacing at the loud popping noises the movements generated. “I still hold out to the hope that the stubborn old mule will let go of his plans for power and realize what a gift he has already on his hooves as the leader of an elite team of the finest magical minds of this Age. For all his ego and dismissive attitude towards those without magic, Bleak Mountain has mellowed immensely from what he used to be like as a young stallion. Back then, if you two had squared off, I would have had to wrap you in enough protective spells to withstand a point-blank mana-bomb explosion just to keep all of your limbs attached.”

“… Well now I’m even more concerned that somepony with that type of personality is in charge of our elite magical troops!”

“Don’t forget, Captain Dawn Ray, to become a Magi in my nation, one must swearing several magically-binding oaths that anchor themselves to the soul of the one who swears them to even be considered for the selection process, and due to the wording of those oaths, I am made immediately aware of when an attempt to either subvert or escape those oaths is made. To reach the level of power and influence that Bleak Mountain now occupies, there are layers upon layers of bindings and compulsion charms built into and ontop of his oaths, the same as every other Magi who has worn the five rings of that station, to ensure that none of my Magi can, directly or indirectly, become a threat to this world.” The Solar Princess gave her new Captain of the Royal Guard a friendly shove with her wing, to which the aging Unicorn grumbled slightly. “Bleak Mountain has always been a risk, but at least working as the head of my Magi, his ambitions are given a reasonable outlet without causing undue harm to the civilian population and his power is channelled towards a nobler goal than mere self-empowerment like most petty sorcerers from the wider world aspire to.”

“Be that as it may … what are we going to do with Sunset? Leave her in the Cell of Ultimate Confinement? It might be the safest move we could make right now.” Dawn Ray murmured, glancing at the piles of paperwork on either side of Celestia’s desk.

“After you just chewed out Bleak Mountain over torture? Continuing her imprisonment when it is clear that Sunset is as much a victim as Trixie?” The Solar Princess’s tone was playful, but her eyes narrowed as she turned her full attention to her acting Captain of the Royal Guard.

“I am more concerned about how badly things could spiral out of control if she runs into the Changelings. Technically, Sunset Shimmer hasn’t been a citizen of Equestria since she was officially declared missing after my predecessors failed to find her when she … uh …” The unicorn Captain began strong, then began to splutter out as he realized what he was about to say in-front of Celestia.

“You mean when she ran away from me after suffering a fit of egotism? When my high-hoofed teaching methods drove away one of the most promising students I’d ever been blessed with?” The Solar Princess’s smile turned gentle and sad as Dawn Ray reached a hoof out towards her, mouth opening to speak, before the Stallion’s features turned into a mask of misery and he retreated, emotionally, into a parade stance to hide his distress. “I am certain the wording of Chrysalis’s blood-pact does indeed include Sunset Shimmer since she is legally a citizen of Equestria, but you are correct to be concerned. Thus, I have an excellent solution.”

“And that is?”

“We will be moving Sunset Shimmer into her old quarters in this wing of the Castle, and I shall be seeing to all of her needs while she is under … confinement.” The Solar Princess repressed the urge to chuckle as Guard Captain’s eyes bulged and his jaw dropped to the point she was almost worried he’d dislocated something.

“You do realize that Bleak Mountain will pitch an absolute fit when he hears about this? As in, a literal, actual fit, complete with screaming, crying and flailing, right there on the floor.” The aging guard pointed out after nearly a minute of stunned silence.

“Oh, I am aware, but quite frankly this is the best chance I will ever have to make things right with my former student, and however much protection the Cell of Ultimate Confinement might provide, both to prisoner and the rest of the castle, it is still a prison.” Celestia sighed and leaned back into her chair, feeling a sense of rightness to her actions that had been missing for so long. “I am more than capable of warding the chambers on my own if Bleak Mountain refuses to obey, and I will have grounds to consider dismissing him due to refusal of a direct order should the need arise. You all seem to forget …”

Tapping a gold-shod hoof against the equally-gaudy looking chestplate of her Regalia, Celestia gave another smile, this one tight and more akin to a grimace.

“I am no longer content to sit back and let things play out according to Fate’s decree. From this point onwards, I am the one who controls where the dice fall, and how.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Applejack sighed as she packed her suitcase with what she needed for her stay in Canterlot.

Oh, Luna had assured her it would be a quick visit, no more than one or two days at the most, but multiple experiences had taught Applejack that the Princess was either under-estimating the sheer amount of weirdness to crash down on them all, or was over-estimating how swiftly matters would be dealt with.

Of course, there were … other matters that made Applejack sigh. Soarin, a honest-to-Faust Wonderbolt, was being an absolute gentlestallion, helping Granny re-arrange the spare room to provide sleeping quarters for whichever Royal Agent was present on a given day, listening intently to Big Mac as the giant oaf explained the chores the Pegasus would be performing while Applejack was absent, since …

Woulda thought some fancy athelete woulda spit his chips if asked to buck apples down from a tree, but he up an’ tried a dozen times, an’ seemed more crushed e’ry time he failed to get ‘em to drop. Poor Stallion’s tryin’ his heart out, an’ … Applejack felt her cheeks heat up a little as she remembered the look of shame on the Stallion’s face when Soarin had caught Applejack snickering at his first, and painful, attempt to buck the apples out of the trees. Gonna head on down to the kitchen after ah pack an’ get a pie started as an apology. Soarin ain’t no city-slicker, he’s a Royal Agent an’, from what ah can gather, a right honest and strait-shootin’ stallion. That he’s willin’ to put aside his career an’ work like an’ Apple on mah farm is proof of that. Ain’t right to make him think ah’m mockin’ him, not after all o’ that.

Normally, Applejack wouldn’t take much in the way of clothing to Canterlot, the Princess didn’t really care much for the Bearers wearing frippery stuff, Rarity excluded, but her dress from the disasterous Grand Galloping Gala, a few fancy scarves that she’d bought when she had a few bits spare and felt like showing some femininity, some makeup and a large box in which to store her Stetson hat all went into the suitcase. Ain’t no way was she going to show up to Canterlot and risk walking round the halls of the castle like she was going to market, not if she really intended to ask the Princess if Applejack could still have those bits.

Luna’s insistence that they all come immediately also worried Applejack, but for different reasons. Unlike Celestia, the younger Princess didn’t play verbal or mental games or speak in couched terms when trying to explain something, Luna just up and went with her heart and that endeared the Lunar Princess to Applejack far more than Celestia’s double-speak and false platitudes, a fact that Applejack kept trying to tell her inner self wasn’t treasonous in the slightest. So when Luna came up, acting like a broody hen that’d had her eggs stolen and been half-plucked to add insult to injury, the farm-mare took the message seriously.

“You sure ‘bout this, Jackie?” The orange mare jumped in place as Granny Smith spoke from the doorway, surprising Applejack. “Could be takin’ some more stuff if’n you want. Got some other suitcases and carry-bags in the back of my wardrobe. Ah know some of these missions you an’ your friends go on take a while.”

“Consarn … no, granny, ah’m jus’ takin’ some simple stuff an’ mah best business clothes, don’t need to be dressin’ up fancier than ah actually am. And ah can’t very well be askin’ Rarity, not after what’s happened an’ sure as spit not with the poor mare stuck in that cast o’ hers.” Turning in place, Applejack ducked her head and gave the ancient matriarch of her family an apologetic look.

“Hmmph. Seems to me she’s learnin’ a lesson, but she’s your friend, an’ if you’re willin’ to let bygones be bygones, so be it. Now … ‘bout this stallion that’s hangin’ round.”

“Oh, Soarin? What, did he hurt himself trying to buck my apples again?” Ears pricking forwards and a hint of dread entering her voice, Applejack took a step forwards in concern. “Ah hope the idjit didn’t take mah laughin’ at him personal an’ tried to prove he could do it …”

“…” Granny Smith merely narrowed her eyes, staring Applejack over, before shaking her head and grinning like a cat that just found the cream. “No, y’durn fool, he’s off with Mac seein’ to the grain silo. Handy, havin’ a stallion with wings ‘round to patch the roof an’ get the rain-clouds right where the fields are driest. Might be we could keep him ‘round, maybe plant a few more things in the orchard, hmmmmm?”

“Granny, you know pegasi make terrible farmers. They might do well as pickers or temporary farm-hooves, but they don’t do well on the ground, not like those who make their living off farming do.”

“Oh sweetie, you give that boy the right motivation, I’ll bet he could plow your fields like you never even dreamed.”

“With those wings, he’ll never be able to wear a harness like Big Mac so he’d never be able to till the fields. An’ he’s gotta go back to the Wonderbolts after all this mess is dealt with.” Applejack pointed out, her own eyes narrowing as the grin on her grandmother’s face grew and grew. “You ain’t talkin’ ‘bout farming no more, are you?”

“Great grand foals!” Granny Smith cheered, shaking a forehoof into the air in premature victory.

“Granny, no! Faust’s sake, ah jus’ met the poor stallion, ah ain’t gonna assume the position an’ ask him to mount me!” Blushing furiously, Applejack turned back to her suitcase and fussed with the padded box she’d been grabbing to store her hat in while she slept. The fact that Soarin was not only a damn fine looking stallion, but also polite, respectful and down-to-earth wasn’t doing her heart much good, especially with the lingering effects of the aphrodisiacs still lingering in her system. An’ there’s another reason to get to Canterlot an’ away from the farm. Big Mac an’ ah both still have them durn pills in our bodies, an’ we share a bathroom...

“Well sweetie, if’n your granny was a decade younger, I’d be all over that. Might still give it a try, if’n you’re not brave enough to even ask how Soarin’ feels.”

Applejack’s head snapped back to look at her grandmother, who was still grinning at her.

“Granny, Soarin is a Wonderbolt Co-Captain. He’s probably got the prettiest Mares of Equestria just waiting for him in every town, city and village. Ain’t no way he’s gonna be interested in a dirty ol’ farm mare like me, an’ he ain’t gonna be interested in an’ ol’ mare like you.” The heat in her words left Applejack stunned. Now where in the hay did that come from? Ah know Granny’s jus’ teasin’ me, like always.

“Maybe, but I reckon I’ve got somethin’ none o’ them youngin’s got, not even you.” Granny’s smile didn’t fade a bit as Applejack’s words washed over her.

Against her better judgement, Applejack rose to the challenge. “Oh yeah? Ah can’t wait to hear what that is.”

With a loud pop, Granny Smith reached up with a hoof and pulled her dentures out, her gums sagging and lips flopping down and away from her mouth as she did so, so her words came out a little slurred.

“De’hachable teef.”

For a very precious, irreplaceable moments, Applejack’s brain refused to process the scenario, before her subconscious unhelpfully provided the mental images to go along with Granny Smith’s words.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What was that?” Soarin yelped, lifting his head and banging it on the flared rim of the grain silo, wobbling in the air as he wavered under the self-inflicted blow to his noggin.

Big Mac, with long experience on the farm, as an older brother, and as an Apple, just shuddered in place for a long moment before answering his ‘guest’.

“Ain’t nothin’, jus’ Jackie probably got more’n she bargained for.” The hulking red farm-pony shouted up to the pegasus repairing the leaky roof of the grain-silo.

“Seriously? It sounded like somepony was given the scare of their life while being figged in every opening in their body! What if your sister is in trouble?”

“Trust me. If mah sister is makin’ a sound like that, ain’t neither of us want to be anywhere near the farmstead for at least a few minutes.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Discord?” Celestia asked in concern as her serpentine lover lifted his head from inspecting the wards placed around the outside of Sunset’s room and stared, hard, in the direction of Ponyville. “Is something wrong? Another attack on my sister and Twilight?”

“No …” The Chaos God said, but he sounded hesitant, unsure … and annoyed. “But somepony just made a serious attempt to take over my spot as Equis’s number-one prankster.”

“… Should I be concerned?” The Solar Princess put down the enchanted mithril chisel she had been using to inscribe the warding runes into the marble walls and placed a wing on Discord’s slender shoulders, to hold him back or give him comfort, she wasn’t sure.

“No, but I suspect you might need to give Applejack a little bit more time with your therapist than you were originally planning to.”

Chapter 70

“So … hey.”

“Yeah … hey.”

Twilight and Rainbow Dash gave each other guilty looks, bearing matching boxes of cakes from the Sugarcube Corner bakery on their backs, while Spitfire looked on with bemusement.

“Seriously. Just go in, tell Rarity you’ve got enough cakes for her and her bodyguards, apologise, get a move on.” The Wonderbolt smirked as the two Bearers gave her chagrined looks. “Just because you both came up with the same plan doesn’t mean one of you has to go home empty-hooved. I’m sure Rarity will be estatic to know two of her friends have come over to make sure she’s okay.”

“Maybe, but I put her in a full body cast. She might start throwing a hissy fit if I just walk in…” Rainbow Dash mumbled, shifting awkwardly on her three hooves, her wings spreading out to hold the box of cakes in place. “And we kinda caused a scene at the Cake’s bakery, so I’m a bit on edge.”

“Uh … what kind of scene? When I went in, Mr Cake had had to go have a lie-down, and my mane is still wet where Mrs Cake and I hugged it out and she said something about you accusing the Royal Guards of trying go steal something from you? Wi-fi, wires, waifs, something like that?”

Rainbow went pale and began spluttering, while Spitfire just raised an eyebrow, looking back and forth from the clueless Princess to the terrified Pegasus and said “… Oh. Oooooooh. I get it now. Dayum, rookie, you got your work cut out for you.”

“I ah … plead the fifth. How about I give Rares my cakes as an apology for the Rainbow Rib-Buster, and you give her the cakes as treats for her guards?” Stammering only slightly, Rainbow gave a pleading look to Spitfire, then a big, toothy grin to Twilight.

“That will work out … I think. Besides, I also need to get Moonbeam and the Night Guard ready to get Rarity prepped and ready for an emergency flight to Canterlot.” The purple Alicorn blinked at her friend’s antics, and then again at the Wonderbolt Captain’s snickering, before shaking her head, as if to say ‘no’ to herself. “Speaking of which … you’ve got nothing on for the next few days, right?”

“Uh … nothing I can’t fob off to somebody else, no. What, we got more Bearer Duties to deal with?” Now looking decidedly less nervous as the conversation drifted to more serious, and less personal, directions, Rainbow leaned in close to whisper to Twilight as Spitfire knocked on the front door of Rarity’s Boutique. “Seriously, is this okay? I mean, you were saying Rarity had been really messed up by her Element. What if us walking in sets her off again? Or makes whatever Generosity did to her worse?”

“Actually, I’ll explain fully once we’re inside and I can drop a privacy shield over the top of us all, but for now, Rarity should be safe from anything Generosity has planned.” Twilight whispered back as the door cracked open, and the yellow eye of a Thestral peered out, flicking over Spitfire, then Twilight and Rainbow Dash.

“My apologies, but I must ask that you wait for a moment, Moonbeam and Lady Rarity are engaged in some delicate matters at the moment and cannot be disturbed.” The Thestral said solemnly, wincing slightly as Twilight gave him a puzzled look. “They are discussing … private matters right now.”

“Is this about Rarity getting shaved bald by Nurse Redheart?” Twilight whispered back, and the Night Guard’s ears flattened in dismay as Rainbow Dash and Spitfire both fought back laughter.

“Please, do not say that out loud. We Thestrals have a very keen sense of hearing, and my comrades and I would appreciate not being driven up the walls by Lady Rarity’s whining again.” The Thestral’s voice took on a note of pleading as he opened the door and ushered them in. “I believe that Lady Rarity will not be too upset if you were to wait in her display room? One of my comrades has already gone upstairs to notify Moonbeam of your arrival, and I suspect that the paparazzi will soon be drawn to two Bearers and a Wonderbolt standing out in the open like bees to honey.”

It felt strangely nostalgic to walk into Rarity’s display room, to sit down and admire the many dresses and suits, some elegant and simple, others so loaded with ornamental frills and gem-encrusted decorations it was a testament to Rarity’s skill as a tailor and designer that the garments didn’t shred themselves under their own weight.

How many times have I sat here and shared gossip from Canterlot with Rarity and Fluttershy? Long afternoons of laughter and tea and soft conversation? Twilight sighed and ran a hoof down the sleeve of an elegant off-white silk dress festooned with lime-green and pale-gold silk ribbons. Will we ever have those times again? Or has my Ascension, and these infernal Elements, destroyed that part of our lives?

My apologies for interrupting, Pillar, but please don’t be so down. This is a dark moment in history, especially for the Elements to have two of our number fail their duties so completely, but there will be brighter days in the future. A new voice, this one so soft that Twilight had to stop for a moment and double-check that Fluttershy wasn’t hiding behind the chair, much to Rainbow and Spitfire’s confused amusement, whispered in the back of her mind.

That doesn’t sound like Magic or Honesty, and I doubt Generosity would be so polite, so if I may ... Twilight ‘thought’ at the voice, and was rewarded with a soft giggle.

Of course, Pillar. I am known as Laughter. The soft voice echoed for a moment, and then there was an oddly-faceted crystal of tourmaline floating by her head, two outgrowths of blue-hued crystal on either side of a slightly larger pale yellow crystal … that reminded Twilight uncomfortably of Pinkie Pie’s Cutie Mark. We decided that one of the Elements should remain at your side at all times until the Mother of Stones can deal with both you and poor Rarity, just in case Magic has something planned, or Generosity has truly done something drastic to it’s Bearer.

And I wasn’t informed about this beeeecaaaaaaause … Hoping her frown wasn’t taken the wrong way by the other Ponies in the room, Twilight turned her attention to the gemstone floating in-front of her.

Honesty was quite drained after sealing up Magic’s connection to your Inner Well, and being the dusty old fusser that he is, had to immediately go check up on his little Apples to make sure they were all safe and sound. Laughter explained, then tittered again as Twilight’s ears twitched at the faint sounds of Honesty yelling something incoherently in her mind, although it sounded as if ‘he’ was doing so from a great distance, perhaps even so far away as to be at Sweet Apple Acres. I was waiting till we were inside Rarity’s boutique to reveal myself in case more of those pesky mortals showed up to try and harass you again, and while we’re talking openly, I must ask you leave me with your friend, Rarity. I’ll be doing my best to provide her what comfort I can until the Mother of Stones can see exactly what Generosity did inside her mind, and before you leave, either Loyalty or Kindness will arrive to act as your bodyguard.

“Uh, Twilight, you’re twitching, as in ‘I need a hug or something is going to turn inside-out and blow up’-kind of twitching.” Rainbow said, and when Twilight turned to look, both Pegasi had taken shelter behind a long, low couch and were giving Twilight wary looks, their eyes and upper heads the only parts of them visible over the back of the couch. “And what’s with the gemstone?”

“Oh, right, you two aren’t aware of the delightful little addition to the manure-pie that’s been dropped onto our plates. Rainbow, Spitfire, meet Laughter. The Element of Laughter. Who has been tailing us to make sure that the Rogue Elements of Magic and Generosity haven’t pulled another fast one on us and is apparently needing me to leave it, unsupervised, with Rarity to make sure she doesn’t have another psychotic episode, or worse.” Twilight lifted a fore-hoof up until Laughter’s gemstone form was resting upon the frog of her hoof. “Laughter, you already know Rainbow by now, and the yellow pegasus is Spitfire, Captain of the Wonderbolts and a Royal Agent. Do anything to harm them and I will feed you to Spike.”

“Wait, aren’t the Elements our necklace-thingies?” Rainbow’s head popped up from behind the couch’s back to get a better look at Laughter, while Spitfire’s eyes widened and the Wonderbolt disappeared entirely behind the couch.

“Those are the vessels we inhabit when the Powers of Harmy are required. Otherwise, we remain in our natural forms …” Laughter spoke out loud this time, and it reminded Twilight more of a chorus of adorable kittens mewing than actual words, giving her the almost uncontrollable urge to hug and pet the Element, and it seemed the effect was also felt by Rainbow and Spitfire, the two of them scuttling out from behind the couch to approach Laughter as if on strings. “… Oh, my apologies, I forgot I had that effect when speaking directly to you mortals. Normally, the Elements exist as our mineral forms unless the Bearers need our aid, at which point we immediately return to the Torcs to serve as your connections to the forces of Harmony.”

“What was that?” The purple Princess asked distractedly as Spitfire and Rainbow shook their heads and took a step back from Laughter, a little rattled from being overwhelmed by the urge to be near Element’s true form.

“I am imbued with certain traces of the Powers that tend to invoke, well, laughter and joy amongst the mortals. When I speak directly to mortals, I have the unfortunate tendency to inspire the brains of all third-dimensional life-forms around me to release large amounts of endorphins, which in turn causes them to become extraordinarily happy and focused upon me unless I throttle the energy I am releasing.” Laughter sighed and spun on the surface of Twilight’s soft, spongy frog, turning it’s largest facets towards her. “Poor Honesty makes mortals speak the truth no matter how damaging and become annoying sticklers over the tiniest things if he isn’t careful when out and about amongst your Morals, and the last time Loyalty took a vacation and assumed mortal form amongst Ponykind, let’s just say there was a lot of mortals suddenly decided to get married and a civil war broke out in Prance when Loyalty left to return to it’s duty, a civil war that is still churning along, sadly.”

“Wait, so what does Kindness make Ponies do?” Her curiosity getting the better of her, Rainbow leaned in close to stare at Laughter’s crystal form.

“Imagine an entire metropolis turning out to form a giant hug-pile, just finding their nearest friend or loved one, embracing and cuddling and snuggling until Kindness leaves the area. The poor thing doesn’t have quite as much experience dealing with Mortals as the rest of the Elements, so when it forgot some of your more … uncontrollable impulses happened during spring-time and went out exploring to pass the time until the Dreamer returned to Equis, and found itself buried in the middle of a hug-pile that turned into a hump-pile when the estrus of the mares began to affect the assembled mortals. That would have been, oh, thirty, forty years ago?”

“Wait, you mean to tell us that the time when our parents were all wearing bell-bottom pants, eating ‘special’ mushrooms and screwing everything that moved was all because Fluttershy’s Element went out for a walk during spring and forgot to turn off it’s swagger?” Spitfire managed to spit out, trembling in place and her eyes wide and her pupils narrow.

“Effectively, yes. The poor little gem had no idea that it’s ability would intersect so … interestingly … with the reproductive cycle your species goes through every spring, and Kindness didn’t have the foggiest idea what to do when a few thousand Ponies began … uh, breeding all around it. And on it. And with it. The resulting wave of harmonic energy released as Kindness, uhm, reacted in kind … well, the shockwave spread the effect across most of the continent, causing a few decades of bohemian bucking. We keep teasing Kindness that, thanks to it forgetting what you mortals got up to in spring, it is effectively the reason that the Lover walks this world.”

Twilight had to bite her lip to avoid shouting at the Elemental. It had just mentioned that Cadence, another Alicorn and Twilight’s best friend, before coming to Ponyville at least, had only been conceived because one of the other Elements, despite millennia spent amongst pony-kind, had somehow forgotten that the species descended into a breeding frenzy during the months of spring! And that all the Elements apparently caused bizarre reactions amongst ‘mortals’ if they appeared and did not dampen their own powers.

Every time I think I’ve got my hooves on the truth, something deeper is revealed and I am left struggling to keep my balance. For all everypony keeps talking about Harmony and balance, I’m finding precious little of either these days!

You’re trying to reconcile your mortal preconceptions about how reality works, and the social constructs that the Hope-Bringer created to stop the genocidal rampages of your ancestors with the actual truth of creation. Your confusion is understandable, but please, we are trying to help, stop trying to impose your old, mortal mindset on things and trust us. You are not the first Ascending Immortal we have had to protect during their gestation phase, but you are one of the most powerful, and important, ones we have had under our care. Laughter’s voice whispered in her mind, even as the gemstone danced and rolled across Twilight’s frog as it also answered Rainbow and Spitfire’s questions in an audible manner. You are the Pillar, Twilight Sparkle. In all seriousness, and that is a state of being that I struggle to deal with, we cannot afford to allow the Enemy to interfere with your Ascension. Your role in the Plan is vital, and without your strength of character, your desire to protect your friends and the world they live in, your willingness to forgive and forge new bonds of friendship, if we falter in protecting you during this crucial period, more than just your happiness will be lost.

Well, thank you for that ominous little speech then! Like I wasn’t already on the verge of a panic-attack over Magic and Generosity going rogue and now your mother showing up, now you tell me I’m a vital cog in this grand and infinitely convoluted plan of the Powers! What else? If I stub a hoof, will I cause stars to explode as a side effect?

… I don’t believe so? But let’s try to avoid testing your hypothesis, please?

Twilight whimpered, both physically and mentally, as Laughter’s voice took on a tone of grave concern that seemed completely at odds with the emotions that the Element’s presence generated in her and the other Ponies in the room.

It took several moments for Twilight to realize that another Pony had joined them, a sleek female Thestral with silver eyes, mane and tail, who seemed to be looking at Twilight as if she wasn’t sure if Twilight was going to explode if poked or should be literally thrown out of the boutique. The Alicorn blushed and removed her hoof from underneath Laughter, who remained levitating in the air as it ‘spoke’ to Rainbow and Spitfire, the purple princess turned her full attention, rattled as it was, to the newcomer.

“Sorry for dropping in like this, but we’ve got a situation.” Twilight began, bluntly, and explained as quickly as she could what had occurred, and how urgently all the Bearers were needed in Canterlot, feeling the pit of cold dread in her stomach deepen as Moonbeam’s expression grew increasingly dire as she continued. “So, we need Rarity in Canterlot before the day is over, and we need to make sure she’s not going to get banged up or distressed even further on the trip. Does the Night Guard have any sort of secretive route we can take to Canterlot that avoids the paparazzi and is swift enough to make it on time? From what Luna and Honesty said about the Mother of Stones, this is not an entity we want to keep waiting.”

“Rarity is nearly immobilized in her cast. I doubt we can smuggle her into Canterlot without at least a dozen snoops spotting us, let alone the usual cloud of flying gnats swarming us with their cameras and recording gems. Recently, every time a Royal Chariot enters or leaves Canterlot airspace, you can bet your last bit that the paparazzi will immediate mob them on the slight chance it’s a Royal sneaking out of the capital on some secret business the paparazzi can then spin into whatever story they want.” The Thestral mare sighed and seemed to shrink slightly as she realized just who she was speaking to. “Assuming we even could get all of you crammed into a single chariot, we’d be diverted the instant we entered Canterlot airspace to the civilian air-routes if the air-commander on duty that day hadn’t been pre-warned of our approach, and we don’t actually have any method of getting in contact with the pony in charge, at least not without potentially risking our flight-plan being leaked to the paparazzi anyways.”

“Well … the local Royal Agents said that they had a private telegraph line to Canterlot Command. Why don’t we use that, ask them to give us a small opening in the patrol-routes to slip through into Canterlot, and I can use an Invisibility Sphere spell to mask us from sight while we’re inserting ourselves into the city.” Twilight pointed out, feeling a bit sheepish as Moonbeam and Spitfire gave her dark looks.

“Your spell would be detected miles out …”

“There’s way too many patrols in the air for that to …”

The two Mares glared at each other, before turning back to Twilight with faces set into masks of determination, and something inside Twilight snapped aftering being told ‘you can’t do that’ one time too many.

“I think you’re both forgetting some very important points. One, I am the youngest pony to ever earn the title of Magi in recorded history, and Celestia doesn’t hand out that title lightly. Two, I helped the Royal Magi redesign and reinforce Canterlot’s magical defence matrixes in the aftermath of the Canterlot Invasion just so Shining Armor and Cadence could enjoy their honeymoon, so yes, I know how to bypass the capital’s defence system on the fly, if we have to.”

“Three, my friends and I have kind of saved Equestria about … five times now? Six? If I tell Canterlot Command I’m coming in, and they need to divert a patrol at a specific time on a specific day because there’s an all-powerful deity wanting to have a chat with me and my friends, they’re bloody well going to help me for a change, or I’m going to sit on my plot and refuse to bail them out the next time some ancient, unspeakably powerful evil force that nopony but the Princess knows about crawls out from whatever mud-puddle she stomped it into the last time.” The frustration of everything that had happened over the past month came bubbling out of Twilight like a tide of lava, adding an acidic bite to her words she would ordinarily have been horrified at, and made Moonbeam back up a step, eyes widening and one hoof raised in warding, while Spitfire and Rainbow Dash leaned forwards over their couch-turned-barricade, fascinated by Twilight’s change.

“Four, and finally, I am Twilight mother-bucking Sparkle the Alicorn, and I am sick and tired of having to goose-step around the most revolting group of selfish, hateful, spiteful little Ponies I have ever met, who think invading my privacy and selling slanderous fairy tales about me with every other breath to the brainless idiots of Canterlot is their Faust-given right, so maybe it’s time I started to push back and show them why getting under my skin is a bad idea! Anything, pony or otherwise, that stands between me and getting Rarity the help she needs can kiss it’s plot goodbye, because I will run its ass over if I need to.”

“I suppose that means I’ll never convince you to subscribe to the Daily Equestrian then, Twilight?” A thin voice came from around the corner, but held a great deal of mirth, as Rarity was carried into the room in-between two burly Thestrals, her full-body cast replaced by one that merely covered her torso, hind-quarters and neck. A flowing dressing-gown of royal-purple silk covered most of Rarity, from the base of her neck down to just beyond the start of her hooves, no-doubt an attempt to appear as graceful as possible in the cast and to cover up her missing fur, and Rarity’s face, while gaunt and obviously bearing deep bags under her eyes, seemed to be filled with good-humor.

“Rarity!” Twilight and Rainbow yelled at once, the Alicorn dodging around the cowering Moonbeam and Rainbow hobbling as fast as her three working limbs would accommodate, the two hugging Rarity and causing the pair of Thestral Guards carrying her to grunt at the additional strain.

“Easy, easy! I’m still quite fragile!” Rarity shrieked, but in delight, as Twilight and Rarity wrapped their wings around her. “To be honest, darlings, I was certain I would not be seeing any of you again, what with how things … fell apart.”

“Look, can I go first?” Rainbow asked, nervously stepping back from Rarity and fussing with her mane with her wings, her three working legs twitching. “Rairty, I … look, there’s just no way I can apologise enough for what I did, to you I mean. I made a dumb assumption, and went way too far, and hurt you badly. I know there’s no way that just an apology and some cakes can make up for it, but if you’re willing, I’m ready to do whatever it takes to make this up to you.”

Rarity’s smile only grew as Rainbow babbled through her apology, before the Unicorn’s horn glowed and a pillow pompf’d against Rainbow’s head.

“For something like this, I don’t think apologies alone will make a difference … but if you’re willing to make amends, Rainbow, so am I. I … oh dear, I don’t want to admit it, but it was childishly petty of me to plan to make the Cutie Mark Crusaders so hyperactive as a form of revenge for Applejack subduing me in the library.” For several heartbeats, the room stood still as Rarity took a deep breath and calmed herself before continuing on. “And I should have trusted Twilight, after all we've been through together, and just allowed myself to be teleported out of the library. For those actions, I am indeed sorry as well. I think … I think perhaps if we started again from scratch, that might work better than trying to rebuild the relationship we had, yes?”

“I’m cool with that. I am a hundred and twenty percent cool with that.” Rainbow said, her voice cracking as the Pegasus hobbled forwards and hugged Rarity again, sniffling.

“This is hardly starting afresh, Rainbow.” Rarity chided, but her own eyes were more than a little damp.

“We’ll start fresh in five minutes, okay? I’m just happy you still want to be my friend.” Rainbow retorted, voice still sounding thick and muffled from within the cocoon of wings she’d formed around Rarity’s neck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rarity sighed and leaned into Rainbow’s wing, the odd fluttering in her heart matched only by the relief as the nervous, sickening knot of tension in her stomach finally gave way.

Not only had Rainbow, arguably the ‘weakest’ friendship that Rarity had in their little circle of friends, immediately apologised, and with such fevour, for her part in the disaster after the Succuponi’s attack, but Twilight had shown up as well and given a heart-felt, if aggressive, little speech about doing all in her power to help Rarity.

I am not abandoned.

Never had four words sounded so sweet to Rarity, even if they were only heard inside her own mind.

Soaking in the luxury of a wing-hug from Rainbow Dash, which the mostly-imobilized Unicorn had to admit felt divine and also gave her ideas on a new trend of feather-lined cloaks and hoods, Rarity peeked out between a gap in those cerulean-blue feathers and smiled softly as she caught sight of Twilight sagging with relief, then wiping a tear away from her eye.

And I appear to have not been the only pony fretting about the loss of our friendships.

“Now, as much as I appreciate the visit, and I truly do, darlings, what was it you were saying about Canterlot, Twilight?”

“Oh … this is going to take some time to properly explain, but I’ll try to give you the cliff-notes.” Twilight sighed, scratching at her temple with a hoof even as that teary smile played across her face. “It seems that both Generosity and Magic have been, to put it lightly, playing fast and loose with their duties as the focal points of the Powers of Harmony. Generosity in particular seems to have been actively trying to cause disharmony, specifically through poisoning your emotions, but Magic appears to have been subverting me as well, although on a more subtle scale, before the other Elements noticed it and severed our connection earlier today.”

“Furthermore, Pinkie’s Element, Laughter, wishes to, erm, serve as your ‘buffer’ in-case Generosity laid any sort of mental traps before it tore itself out of your mind … if you’re willing. The Elements, those that have remained true to their mission at least, are as horrified at the situation as we are.” Twilight looked at her hoof, where an oddly-familiar looking gemstone twirled on the Alicorn’s frog, before the gem took off into the air and flew over to Rarity’s face.

“Greetings, Lady Rarity. My siblings and I apologise profusely for what our former comrade has done, and while we wait for our leader, the Mother of Stones, to make her way to Canterlot, I would like to offer my services, such as they are, to keep you safe until such time as the Mother may evaluate you and provide a solution to the damage that Generosity may have done to you.” The stone’s voice filled Rarity with an almost manic-like sense of adoration, akin to walking into a room full of baby animals all being incredibly adorable all at once and competing for her undivided attention, and as she tried to focus, the immobilized Unicorn noted that her Thestral ‘guards’ were equally entranced, staring at the strange, ‘talking’ gem with almost child-like wonder.

“I’m … not entirely certain I am prepared to share my mind with another being, not after learning that my Element was literally pulling my strings for years.” Rarity said, feeling oddly disappointed in herself for rejecting the Element, like an adult for telling a child it couldn’t have a treat the child had so definitely earned.

“I would not be in your mind, so to speak, but rather if you would wear me on your person, I would be able to monitor your emotional and mental state, and thus make certain that Generosity doesn’t attempt to ‘jump’ back into you. Your connection to Generosity was strong, after all, second only to Magic’s connection to Twilight Sparkle.” The blue-and-yellow tourmaline gemstone explained, rolling it’s facets around to expose it’s largest ones to Rarity’s gaze. It gave her the oddest sensation that the Element was looking directly ‘at’ her. “Think of my presence as closer to the function of a rain-coat, keeping you safe from an external threat, if that clothing analogy works better for you? I will be in contact with only your outermost thoughts and emotions at best, and nothing more.”

Rarity hesitated for a few seconds, before nodding and giving a nervous smile to the gemstone-like Elemental.

“Excellent! I will leave the actual placement of my core to your discretion, and I will keep our communications as short as possible to preserve your mental privacy as much as I am able.” Laughter giggled, and the entire room of Ponies all twitched as they felt the urge to stroke the gem like it was an adorable puppy wiggling excitedly.

“Oh, I think I have a brooch or pendant that I can adjust to suit your … core?” Rarity said, tilting her head from side to side, as much as the neck-brace of her cast would allow, and her eyes widened as the gemstone vibrated before surging forwards to rub itself against her cheek.

“I get to be jewellery? Oh, oh, thank you, thank you! I cannot believe this is … oh my word, this is amazing! Don’t worry if the setting doesn’t fit exactly, I can manipulate the metal to suit whatever design you come up with!” Laughter squealed with delight and began doing rapid loops around Rarity’s head. “I haven’t been this excited since the Vessels took on the form of torcs and a crown! I get to be a piece of jew-elle-ry!”

“Is that … good? I mean, you’d be stuck in a piece of cold metal and worn as an ornament.” Twilight interrupted, staring blankly at the Elemental.

“Good, no, it’s wonderful! Every gemstone dreams of the day they can become a piece of jewellery, to become living art, to be worn and adored, coveted and admired, by all who look upon them. We, the Elements that is, endured being humble stone because it was a necessity of our role as the focal points for the Harmonic Magic that the Princesses would need to wield, but when we became actual jewellery for you delightful Mares, well, it’s a good thing we’re not technically supposed to speak to you Mortals, else you would have been deafened by our delight if we’d broken that rule back then.” Laughter’s orbits around Rarity’s head became more erratic. “I do wish the Hope-Bringer had allowed us to be worn by our Bearers more often, but I understood that our presence would have drawn unnecessary danger upon this village of yours.”

A broad smile spread across Rarity’s face as she took in the odd shape of Laughter’s ‘core’, and dozens of designs, in gold, silver and platinum, flashed through her mind’s eye. The concept of a piece of jewellery that wanted to be worn, that could manipulate itself to change the design at will, opened up a whole slew of options that Rarity had never even dreamed possible outside the realm of whimsy and fantasy.

“Speaking of which, Laughter, can you alter your core’s appearance, or is that set in stone, as it were?”

“Oh, a word-pun! We shall have such fun together on the trip to Canterlot, Lady Rarity!”

And suddenly, Rarity was reminded that this was an entity that could share a mind-space with Pinkie Pie and not be reduced to a gibbering wreck, and began to wonder if her willingness to partner with Laughter was truly as wise as she and the others had originally thought.

Chapter 71

Chapter 71

Dappled wondered if perhaps he should attempt to sneak out of the room, given how dark the mood had become. The grizzled old veteran of a Unicorn had an expression of shock and disbelief on his face, while Princess Celestia had gone gray and refused to speak ever since the letter from Canterlot Command had arrived. And the infernal buzzing in his head, that had started when he had entered the lushly-appointed room, larger than small unit he rented out back at the border, and made it difficult for Dappled to focus on their questions.

The teasing he’d endured ever since the two Royal Guards had mistaken his intention to teach Scout that her affectionate nature could be taken the wrong way had only escalated to the point where the hapless Border Guard had been ordered to come to the Princess’s private quarters and explain himself.

And then a messenger had come stumbling in, pale-faced, to deliver a decoded letter from Ponyville right after Dappled Light had explained himself to the best of his ability and was considering his options, which appeared to be limited to being throttled by the good Captain, dying of shame from the expression the Princess wore like a mask after learning of his masturbation habits, or more preferably, throwing himself out the window to a merciful release from this living hell.

“Errr, your majesty, Captain, should I leave? This … seems like a bad time for me to be here.” Dappled ventured in the smallest voice he felt a Guard should use, loosening his grip on his ability, allowing the power to flow out and make himself seem so utterly insignificant he could possibly just walk up and out of the room … and maybe Equestria itself. Maybe I can just walk to Mulexico and make a living as a fruit-picker or something. Somewhere an anyonmous pony with no real talent can just disappear safely...

Dappled wasn’t entirely sure his heart had been prepared to see the Princess look so … crushed by something as simple as a letter especially not after seeing the look of banked fury and contempt she had been emotionally bludgeoning him with just a few minutes before.

“No, Private Dappled, I will ask that you remain.” Still looking awful, the Princess gave him a searching look. “And I will ask you do not use your ability on me. Now that I know you are an Empath, your ability can no longer hide your presence from my power, and attempting to use it so does not inspire confidence.”

“I … apologise, your majesty, it’s just that I’m only a Border Guard. If you’ve received news of the kind that can make a Princess look so concerned, should I even be in the room? I can’t possibly have the clearance for anything of that level of importance.” Dappled squirmed in place as he mentally ‘grabbed’ his ability and tightened his ‘grip’ until he could barely feel a trickle of power escaping his grasp, torn between the need to grovel and apologise for, well, everything, and the urge to vomit from the tension twisting his guts into knots and the throbbing headache the buzzing sensation in his head was causing.

“Regarding your posting, consider yourself re-assigned to Canterlot on special orders until the situation with the Changelings warrants other actions.” Dawn Ray growled, giving Dappled a look that made the brow-beaten Border Guard attempt to assume parade-stance while sitting down, purely on instinct. “While we do believe your story about the Changeling, Scout, your actions at the border were hardly the conduct expected of a Guard, Border or Royal. We should all be grateful that the Changeling Queen isn’t leveraging the potential scandal towards her own ends, and we still don’t know if she’s merely holding that ace up her sleeve until she needs something we’re unwilling to give.”

“If … if that happens, Sir, I’m fully prepared to fall on my own sword, if that’s what it takes to salvage the situation. Let’s be honest, I’m terrified the Changeling called Scout is actually a complete innocent and is being manipulated by her Queen to be some sort of cat’s paw, and your Magi creep me out.” Dappled Light replied, feeling an odd sense of annoyance warring with his guilt and shame as Dawn Ray looked down at him with a sneer splayed across the old stallion’s muzzle. How often did some stallion just like this ignore me when I was growing up? Just because of my stupid gift … a gift that I now know ponies like him were supposed to be on the lookout for!

“Dare I ask why my Magi ‘creep you out’?” Celestia said in a dejected tone, giving Dappled a look that just screamed ‘what else has gone wrong’. Panic and his growing headache propelled Dappled into speaking his mind. After all, what else can they do to me right now?

“Well, your Highness, it’s just that all of a sudden, all these important, successful ponies are wanting me to be their friend, show them how ‘strong’ I can be, all that shi … stuff. Perhaps I’m just being petty and bitter here, but where were they when it really counted, when I was a colt barely able to function on my own in society when my Cutie Mark appeared, and I suddenly developed this ‘gift’ you’re all gushing over after hiding from a pack of bandits who came boiling out of the Badlands to steal all of our food and water? Everypony but my foster-parent seemed to forget I even existed overnight, and not one missing poster or search party was formed when nopony could ‘see’ me anymore.” Dappled snapped, glaring back at Dawn Ray, who blinked and leaned back in his seat, mouth opening into a small ‘o’ of surprise, and Celestia’s face furrowed further into a deep frown. “I spent years being ignored by everypony around me, even when my foster parent stood up for me again and again, for no reason I could figure out until I nearly died from neglect when my parent fell ill and was moved to Canterlot for treatment, and I realized I had to suppress my gift with everything I had just to get ponies who had known me my whole life to realize I was deathly ill myself, right in their midst and screaming for them to help me at the top of my lungs before they finally remembered I existed and asked where I’d been all this time!”

“Why, for the love of Faust herself, did nopony not look up the school records and notice there was a student who had suddenly disappeared from the rost for several years? Or the medical records? Or to investigate the house they’d been asked to look after and then locked me out of the moment my parent disappeared? Why did none of scores of Ponies make a single report when a child who had been deeply involved with their own families for years disappeared without a trace in their midst, and why did nopony every follow up the irregularity of the situation when my parent died of her illness in Canterlot and our relationship as a family was a matter of public record? Or do the Royal Guards and Agents only do their work in Canterlot, where the donuts are fresh and they can get a nice little pat on the head from their fat-arsed Princess?”

There was silence for several seconds before the reality of the situation caught up to Dappled, and he all but shoved both fore-hooves into his mouth in shock and horror at what he’d just said in-front of the Princess and the highest military authority in the land, both of whom were technically his bosses … and the buzzing in his head stopped.

“Finally, we get to the root of your abilities, the reason why your power expresses itself the way it does.” Celestia said in a quiet voice, giving Dappled a look of pity now. “Empaths such as yourself, Dappled Light, tend to come into their power during moments of intense emotional distress, specifically negative emotions. I had … intended to be far more gentle with my probing, but your interactions with the Changelings, and this awkward situation with Scout the Changeling has forced my hoof.”

A gilded, armored hoof pushed forwards an ostentatious-looking knick-knack that had been sitting on the long, low coffee-table between the chairs, and Dappled belatedly realized the six-sided pyramid of lead-grey metal was covered with angular, sharp-edged runes that were glowing with a dull, sickly blue-green energy that was slowly fading away to nothing.

“Guard …, no, we’re beyond titles and position now. Son, I’ll be blunt with you. The last Empath the Royal Guard faced was a hundred and thirty years ago, and that Mare needed long-term and repeated physical contact to make a Pony like her. The only reason we found her was because the Royal Agents of that era were investigating several incidents of ponies going missing after hiring a wandering family of vagabonds and, specificially, letting them stay on the property at the time. It turned out she was a very loney, very twisted mare who’d grown up in an abusive situation, and had been kidnapping Ponies who had been nice to her as she travelled the country and was confining them in their own homes and then … conditioning them to be the kind of Ponies she believed a loving family was supposed to be like.” Dawn Ray leaned forwards and pulled a dome of lead, capped with a large, plain ball ontop, and placed it over the pyramid, blocking the light from the sickly-looking runes, and the faint headache that remained after the relic, and the buzzing it had caused in Dappled’s skull, disappeared along with all hint of the six-sided pyramid.

“It took Happy Home weeks to usurp her victims sense of self and remake their identities to suit her twisted impressions of ‘family’, and she needed the aid of her older victims to keep her newer ones docile enough to make the mindwashing stick. You, on the other hoof, are so powerful, and untrained, that you make Ponies ignore your presence at a range of up to thirty feet without even trying, and if you do try to control your ability, you can make yourself all but invisible even if you walk right in-front of a pony and open a door or move an object that they themselves are interacting with and they do not react to the changes in their enviroment.” Dawn Ray continued, showing Dappled a very tired and bleak expression that quelled the fury that had been bubbling up inside the young Border Guard at being manipulated so. “You don’t need to touch a pony to make your ability work, or talk to them or use magic on them. In short, you’re the most dangerous Empath the Royal Guard has encountered in over a thousand years, and one of the most powerful of your kind on record. We had to be sure we weren’t dealing with a very powerful and careful monster who had worked its way into our ranks to avoid suspicion, rather than just a very young stallion with a … unfortunate talent for doing exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time.”

“It is a testimony to your nature that you’ve never abused your gift for personal gratification at another’s expense, or to pursue revenge or some other vile ambition. While your actions during your stint as a Border Guard were … regrettable, they may be atoned for.” The Princess fixed Dappled with a searching look that immediately reminded him of Candy Apple, and then she gave him a small smile. “Make no mistake, your role as a Border Guard is over. Your new role will be undergoing intense training to master your natural gift and personal attention from Dawn Ray here to bring your mind and body up to the level required to be a Royal Guard, and if in the process I use your existence as a goad to encourage my Royal Agents to pay more attention to such situations, then so be it.”

“I’m … going to be a Royal Guard?” Dappled squeaked in horror, clutching himself with two spit-wetted forehooves.

“Most Ponies would jump at the honor.” Dawn Ray grumbled unhappily, before Celestia leaned over and shoved the old warhorse with a wing.

“And most Ponies don’t have an autonomous power that compels everyone around them to ignore their existence.” Celestia pointed out. “While I would normally perform the ritual binding oaths over several weeks, the information I have just received precludes such formalities.”

“Wait … wait wait wait. How can you know I’ve never used my abilities to hurt others? And don’t I get a say in this? A Royal Guard? I have to focus just to get Ponies to notice me, and you want me to be the kind of pony who barks orders and gets up in everyone’s face?” The former Border Guard spluttered, alternating between bouts of twitching panic and shuddering denial.

“The relic you were just exposed to is a … very old device from before the arrival of your people across the Dragonspine Mountains, a relic from a time very long ago, known as the Age of Tragedy. If you had been the kind of pony who would intentionally harm others, the runes would have glowed a very strong blood red. If you had ever attempted to use your gift to … abuse others while they remained ignorant of your presence, it would have glowed purple and leaked green fluid. Needless to say, if you had been so inclined, we would not be having this discussion and my maids would have been bemoaning the unexplained ash-stains on my favourite tea-couch.” Celestia raised a cup of tea to her lips and took a delicate sip as Dappled felt the blood drain from his face at his Princess and supreme Overlord discuss eradicating him on the spot like she was talking about the weather. “There is a great deal more to the device, but suffice to say, you passed the test of integrity with flying colours. Most Ponies don’t notice the damned thing with my chambers already cluttered with ancient, enchanted knick-knacks, and it has helped me learn to guage a Pony’s true nature at a glance many times over the millenia. As such, I believe you will serve wonderfully as a Royal Guard, especially once you eventually take up your post at Princess Twilight’s side as one of her stalwart defenders.”

Dappled whimpered and folded up into as small a shape as an adult pony could muster, and Dawn Ray merely coughed and looked dismayed.

“Speaking of which, we really should send a courier to pack up your belongings and bring them to Canterlot. I think if we allowed you to return home, Private Dappled, you’d probably make a run for the border to escape.” The acting Captain of the Royal Guard said in a tired voice as Dappled did his best impression of a Chihuahua in the middle of winter, shuddering and shivering as the young Unicorn sat with his tail coiled around his hooves, with a horrified expression gripping his young face. “Anything we need to know about, lad? I’ll send one of my more reliable boys out to pack your stuff up, but anything, ah, contraband will have to be destroyed. Royal Guards are held to the highest of standards, after all.”

Dappled merely pointed a hoof at his Princess and squeaked wordlessly, yet somehow conveying an intense panic and fear of the smiling, serene Alicorn seated on the other side of the coffee-table.

For several moments the tableau held, before Dawn Ray turned again to the Princess and said “Your Radiance, could you give us a minute?”

Princess Celestia turned, for her own part, and gave her acting Captain a wan look. “Despite what some Ponies may think, I am hardly some dainty maiden aunt, to be gently escorted from the room when the conversation takes a turn away from pure topics. I very much doubt young Dappled here has anything worse than a few pornographic novels and some salacious magazines stashed at his home, the same as many ponies do, both in and outside of the Guards.”

Private Dappled’s desperate, high-pitched whine of distress continued, and Dawn Ray’s expression turned stony.

“Oh, very well. Stallions.” Celestia sighed dramatically, putting her teacup down delicately and trotting away to a set of double-doors on the far side of the tea-room. “Please, Captain, do tell me when it is fine for me to return to my tea-room in my own castle.”

“As you will, Radiance.” Captain Dawn Ray said with all due gravity as Princess Celestia scoffed and too-delicately-to-be-called-slamming shut the door behind her. “Alright, Dappled, what are we talking here? Something serious, or just humiliating? The Harmonic Pyramid has never failed to pick up the rotten traits in a Pony’s personality before, but you are an Empath, and we’ve never tried to put an Empath and a Relic from the Age of Tragedy together in the same room before.”

It took Dappled a few moments to stop his panicked whining noises and manage to use proper equish, but he finally untangled his tongue and unburied his courage.

“Mag … magazines, sir. Pornographic ones, to be specific …”

“Lad, I hardly doubt that the Princess is going to be upset. You should see some of the stuff that turns up in the monthly clean-ups of the barracks, and Princess Celestia barely lifts an eyebrow at some of the stuff that turns up when she does her random inspections.”

“Magazines … involving the Princesses, sir, or rather actors dressed up like them. Both of them. At the same time.”

Dawn Ray lifted a greying eyebrow and said “… Uh-huh?”

“Uhm … they’re very … explicit. And the actors portray sisters who are … uncommonly close.”

“Considering what you mentioned doing to Scout the Changeling, I doubt … wait, son, back up a moment. Are you telling me you have copies of the banned Playcolt magazine featuring Extra Thicc and Nightly Nookie, two of the most prolific porn-stars in Equestria to play the roles of our Princesses in an incestuous relationship?”

“Errr … yes. And the Rustler issue #257. And Pretty Haunches, Spring Edition from last year. I … may have a thing for sisters with big backsides.”

“Well son, I’m not sure if I should yell at you for harbouring impure thoughts about our Princesses, or yell at you for besmirching such irreplaceable treasures to all stallion-kind.” Dawn Ray growled, but his muzzle split into a thin, almost tense grin. “I will say this, once you begin your training as a Royal Guard, that kind of thinking and that kind of … reading material … will be strictly off-limits.”

“I … I would have thought you would be enraged, sir.”

“I’m not so old that I don’t remember what it’s like to have a fire in your loins when a lovely Mare with a plot thick enough to bounce cannonballs off walks past with a spring in her step, but as a Guard, Royal, Border or otherwise, you must be able to separate work from pleasure.” The greying war-horse’s grin turned broader and more toothy as Dawn Ray leaned across to lift his coffee cup with a hoof, only to pause over a faintly glowing crystal on the coffee-table. “Odd, what’s this then?”

Both Stallions felt their manes stand on end as a faint, soft kreeeeek reached their ears, both Dawn Ray and Dappled turning slowly to look at the doorway where Celestia had left not too long ago, where the Princess’s head had now re-emerged into the room, wearing an indescribable but absolutely terrifying expression of outrage, with a twin to the glowing crystal on the coffee table held up to her ear.

“Well. Bugger me then.” Dawn Ray said bluntly as Celestia’s eyes began to glow with an inner flame. “I suppose now is a good as time as any for the beginning of your lessons, Dappled. Let me give you some advice that allowed me to survive this job long enough to become a veteran.”

Unable to look away from the slowly-intruding Angel of Death wearing Princess Celestia’s form that was incrementially pushing itself into the room, Dappled leaned over and hoarsely asked “What?”, praying for some sage wisdom that could somehow save them both from the implacable doom bearing down on them, praying he could hear those words over the thundering of his own heart in his ears.

As the seconds ticked by and Celestia had almost entirely entered the room, Dappled jumped as he heard a loud bang, flicking his eyes away from the vision of his own well-earned death to where Dawn Ray should have been sitting on the opposite side of the coffee table and saw … an open window, with the last hairs of Dawn Ray’s white-streaked tail whipping in the air as the aging warhorse threw himself out of the fourth storey window with the beginnings of a flight spell swirling around his horn.

Feeling oddly betrayed and more than a little bit annoyed that he hadn’t thought of it first, Dappled flicked his eyes back to the doorway … and found himself almost eyeball-to-eyeball with the Princess’s furious face.

“They have magazines about my sister and I doing what, my little pony?” Celestia snarled, her mane and tail now blazing infernos of beautiful golden and red flames, her armor gleaming like molten metal as spikes and razor-sharp edges began to emerge from her Regalia to match the disposition of the Princess as her fury and will pressed down on Dappled like a mountain.

Dappled's response was a terrified squeak, before fainting dead away on the couch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight gave Luna a funny look as the Lunar Princess’s head shot up and turned in the direction of Canterlot, the two Princesses elbow-deep in farm-work to help prepare the Apples for Applejack’s absence over the next few days, while Big Mac, Soarin and Snowflake, or Bulk Biceps as he preferred to be called in public, went over the more arduous tasks.

Twilight hadn’t had the heart to explain she was probably stronger than Big Mac right now, and Luna hadn’t been willing to let Twilight prove it either.

“Luna, is everything alright?” Twilight whispered. What if the Mother of Stones had arrived early? What if some new threat had emerged from the past that modern Equestria was ill-prepared for because of Celestia’s alterations to their history.

“My sister is … incredibly angry, Twilight. I think the world just heated up by a degree or two.” Luna replied in a soft voice, blinking nervously.

“Is it another threat?”

“No no, I don’t believe so. But I do think we might want to tread carefully around my sister tomorrow. Her control shouldn’t slip like this, not wearing that much of her Regalia.”

“So I don’t ask the hard-hitting questions then?” Twilight said snippily, scowling at Canterlot and wondering if the blurring in the air was due to the distance or the supposed fury of her mentor that Luna could ‘detect’. “And how … oh. Oh, I just felt that … how come nopony else can see this ...”

“You are an Ascending Alicorn, Twilight, so I’m not surprised, but Mortals cannot see beyond the scope of their limitations, while we, sadly, are afforded no such mercies.” Luna murmured as the two Alicorns turned their full attention to Canterlot, seeing with eyes that no Mortals could match the flowing, surging, furious waves of power that raged outwards from a certain tower in Canterlot Castle. “But yes, let us both be rather judicious in our arguments with my sister tomorrow, I’ve no desire for my sister to banish us both to Ponyville for longer than a year because we happened to prod a recent wound to her dignity or sense of propriety.”

“She wouldn’t do that, right?”

“If you really do believe that she wouldn’t, then I have several promising craters on the moon to sell you, dear Twilight.”

Chapter 72

Chapter 72

Twilight sighed, looked into the bag of pastries, her second purchase for the day from Sugarcube Corner, cast a spell that would alert her when an hour had passed so that she could move on to her next stop, and then looked at the Ponyville Schoolhouse with as much trepidation as she had once felt looking upon the Everfree Forest.

A sphere of invisibility protected her from casual detection, and it was a necessary defence considering the increasing rabidity of the paparazzi, with the ever-overworked Officer Rulebook having to issue more and more fines and cautions to the mob as the desperate reporters began trying more and more demented plans to get that all-important incriminating shot. At least five of the paparazzi had already been jailed for a disturbance of the peace involving an altercation for a prize perch ontop of the Ponyville Council Offices that looked directly into Twilight’s room … if one had a long distance, high-resolution lense on an illegal, magically-augmented camera, that is.

I need to invest in some one-way windows for the library after this. Lead-lined, preferably, to deal with the paparazzi who’ve got those infernal x-ray lenses. Twilight sighed and tried to rustle up some more courage to get herself through the door and into the school-house. Telling Cherilee that the Crusaders had cursed themselves again would be a piece of cake, but trying to avoid the conversation turning to dating, let alone Cherilee’s last encounter with Twilight where the purple princess had been ignorant of the fact that the school-teacher had been trying to entice Twilight into playing the role of the naughty student to Cherilee’s dominant teacher … And maybe I should be prepared to teleport out of here at the drop of a hat. Or the swish of a ruler. She did mention something about spanking naughty students the last time, and after what happened with the Spa Twins, I am taking no chances!

“Excuse me, Cherilee?” Twilight called out, tapping a hoof on the main door to the school-house and waiting for a response. She could be checking the students’ homework, or working out a lesson plan. Definitely not lying in wait for me with a wicked grin and a ruler that’s about to be used as a spanking device.

The thought of preparing a quick teleportation spell, just in case, suddenly became far more appealing.

“Twilight? Come in, come in!” Cherilee’s voice came out to her in bright, happy tones. Twilight wondered if Cherilee would still be so chipper after Twilight shot her down …

“Hey … Cherilee … sorry for dropping in unannounced, but we’ve got kinda … well, the Crusaders did something rather drastic to themselves, and then they got involved in something even worse …” The purple alicorn began, forcing herself to speak slowly and without stuttering as the school-teacher approached, looking utterly confused at the absence of a body to go with the voice before the purple alicorn dropped her invisibility spell after a final visual sweep of the area for more paparazzi. As Twilight ‘appeared’ before her, Cherilee clapped her hooves together in delight, the school-teacher favouring Twilight with a brilliant smile on her face, accepting the bag of pastries with a murmur of approval as she led Twilight into the school-house before gesturing for her guest to take a seat on one of the student’s tables, while the school-teacher fiddled with a coffee-machine. “Hoooo boy, okay, so, this is going to be awkward, but there’s a few things we need to talk about.”

“Well, whatever mess the Crusaders have gotten themselves into this time, so long as you’re prepared to help the Crusaders keep their averages up, I’m fine with them taking a short break from school. I mean, it’s not like extenuating circumstances don’t go hoof-in-hoof with their ‘crusades’, after all, and having a Princess vouching for them certainly goes a long way towards making the Education Board ignore their absences from school.” The magneta-coloured mare sighed and gave Twilight a small grin as she poured two cups of coffee and hoofed one over to Twilight. “Faust knows you, of all ponies, wouldn’t be pulling them out of school without a serious reason. And I’m assuming that their families know?”

“Errr, yes. The Apples and Rarity are well acquainted with the situation, but I’m at somewhat at a loss to find Scootaloo’s parents to inform them. Scootaloo is very close-lipped on the subject, the other Crusaders don’t know when they’ll be home, and nopony I’ve spoken to can tell me what they do for a living, or even what they look like.” Accepting the cup of coffee with a hoof, not wanting to lord her magic over the hard-working teacher and also wanting to conserve her magical abilities for a flash-teleport out of the room if something else went wrong, Twilight took a deep breath and savoured the aroma of the coffee before taking a polite sip. “There’s also the problem that the Crusaders were accidentally exposed to medication designed to produce a ‘false’ estrus when a miscommunication turned a prank into a potential felony, so we’re very keen to keep them contained until the medication works its way out of their systems for obvious reasons.”

Cherilee blinked, slowly, and took a large gulp of her coffee, apparently oblivious to or conditioned to the burn as her expression turned pensive, then horrified.

“A second generation of Crusaders. I don’t think I’m paid enough to teach two generations of Crusaders in a row …” The teacher mused out loud with a horrified note to her voice, to which Twilight giggled.

“Yes, and the nature of the … curse … they’re labouring under means they are a potential risk to both the other fillies as well as the colts. It’s awkward and I am humiliated to admit Sweetie Belle did this with a spell-scroll I’d been translating, but until their bodies purge the medication, they’re stuck as a ‘third’ gender, if you can believe such a thing exists.”

“Oh, the Neighpone thing?” Twilight’s eyes bugged out and she stared at Cherilee, who shrugged and grinned again at Twilight, this time with obvious mirth. “I went to college and was a real wild-child, remember? Lots of crazy parties and crazier ponies all packed into the same dorm. I roomed with an exchange student from that nation and kind of found out the hard way that such a thing existed when spring rolled around and the poor exchange student got locked into a dorm that was full of randy college mares leaking their hormones all over the place.” Cherilee’s grin turned wider and more shark-like as Twilight spluttered into her cup of coffee. “So the Crusaders are packing and in the middle of a false estrus? Holy Faust, I hope you’re supplying them with the mother-load of birth-control supplies, because if they’re anything like Cherry Blossom, they’ll be damn-near insatiable.”

“You’re … ah, you’re taking this rather well. Nurse Redheart just about threatened to murder somepony when she found out.” At once relieved that Cherilee wasn’t making a scene over the accidental transmutation that Sweetie Belle had brought onto the Crusaders and shocked that the school-teacher was being so blasé about the whole situation, Twilight pushed on. “Y-yes, about the ‘protection’ issue, after the invasion of the Succuponi, I’ve got Spike making the Crusaders meals and making sure they can stay at the spare room in the library, since as a dragon, Spike should be all but immune to mammalian pheromones, and I’ve also recruited Trixie to … guide the girls and make sure they take their morning-after pills and herbal teas, and cast the Spring’s Regret Spell on the girls constantly, just in case the mundane abortificants start to lose effectiveness.”

“Redheart’s always be pretty violent for a mare who works in health-care, but yeah, I’m not surprised, she worked in a really seedy area of Neigh York and thus had to deal with a lot of really sketchy ponies when she was working as a trainee nurse before moving out here. Mare’s got a mean-streak a mile wide, and for good reason considering what they’d try to pull on the nurses working in the waiting rooms in Neigh York. But I’d also make sure Spike knows that if the girls start to get too rowdy, and let’s not forget Trixie doesn’t exactly inspire confidence in the rest of the townsponies, that he should go and get Redheart to help him.” Cherilee sighed, her eyes flicking over Twilight and the bag of pastries before closing in thought for several seconds, and the school-teacher seated herself ontop of her teacher’s table before speaking again.

“We shouldn’t forget that even if he is a baby dragon, he’s still sexually active enough to have an interest in mares. The Crusaders’ pheromones might not affect him, but his own hormones might push him to take advantage of the situation, or he might have another emotionally-powered growth-spurt and we could end up with the next generation of Cutiemark Crusaders being half-dragon ontop of the rest of this mess.” The school-teacher sighed and shuddered silently at some ill-received thought at having to teach those children. “And let’s also not forget that out of the young colts in town, the only real competition he’s got for the affection of the girls would be Snips and Snails, and neither of those two are particularly inspiring examples to convince three hormonal, horny messes who have never really shown any measureable amount of common sense thus far to say no to a rather charming drake.”

“Uh, but what about Featherweight, Button Mash, Pip and … what’s his face? The food-one?” Twilight asked, feeling a little upset that she couldn’t remember the young colt’s name. I’ve lived in this town for years! I’ve defended these ponies with my life! I should know this!

“Truffle Shuffle? Yeah, he’s a little, well, forgettable unless the topic turns to gourmet food, then you can’t get him to shut up. But no, I’m fairly certain Featherweight is about as queer as a seven-bit note, Button Mash doesn’t pay attention to any girls in the ‘three-dee verse’, as he calls it, Pip’s been obsessed with Princess Luna ever since that Nightmare Night incident and Truffle and Twist have been dating for over a year now, so the only unattached colts in my classroom are the two I’d vote most likely to never know the touch of a mare outside of their own mothers.”

“… Ow. I mean, I get they’re dorky and kind of uninteresting unless you’re looking for disposable minions like Trixie did, but still … ow.”

“Twilight, I know Snips and Snails, I’ve known them since they were tiny little foals just starting their school-years. They’d be some of my best students if I could only get them to have some self-confidence, but between Snips’s parents weaponizing him to use as a bludgeon against each other during their divorce and keeping it up for the past ten years out of utter loathing for one-another, and Snail’s parents’ apparent obsession with telling everyone, in-front of their own son no-less, that’s he’s as slow as the creature his cutie mark represents, I spend most of my time with them in school trying to keep them from becoming total dropouts because everypony important in their lives keeps telling them they are losers.”

Twilight’s jaw worked silently as she digested that little bit of information, while Cherilee, apparently relieved to have somepony else to vent to, before the new Princess found an opportunity to get a word in edgewise. “Well, about the boys … this is going to sound awkward, but I’ve been worried that Spike is … well, he’s becoming isolated both from our friends, and ponies his own age. He really only hangs out with the girls and me when we’re off on an adventure, and maybe the Crusaders when they try to make him the focus of their next adventure to get Cutie Marks, so I kind of made a deal with him. If I can get Snips and Snails average grade up to a B-, I’ll give him the weekends off … which he can then spend with Snips and Snails.”

“Clever. Spike helps his friends get their confidence back up, they get the grades they’ll need to be more than labourers once they graduate, and maybe learning that an actual Princess is taking notice of their children will get the parents of my two favourite goof-balls to start acting like actual parents.” Cherilee mused, rubbing at her chin with a hoof while crossing and re-crossing her legs, some sort of nervous tic, Twilight assumed, and certainly was not about squeezing Cherilee’s teats against each other like some sort of demented stress-toy. “I’m all for it, actually, and while they’d never admit it, the two do look up to you, Twilight, and they consider Spike a friend. If you pitch this idea of yours to them the right way, that if they up their grades with your help, they’ll get to hang out with Spike more, you’d probably get them to agree on the spot.”

Time passed in merciful banal fashion as Twilight and Cherilee discussed which topics Snips and Snails struggled with, how best to approach their self-defeating attitudes without causing further issues with the unlucky duo’s parents, and then catch-up work for the Crusaders. It was a treat to simply talk with another intelligent mare about something as familiar and comforting to Twilight as studying and schoolwork, without having to wonder if Cherilee was concerned about her Princess-hood or in cahoots with the paparazzi, and so it came as something of a disappointment when, as Twilight and Cherilee were putting the last touched to the lesson-plan for the Crusaders to follow when the spell-timer Twilight had set up earlier went off, appearing as a small, glowing version of Twilight’s face.

"Warning! Twilight, you are approaching the time limit! You have ~one~ hour and ~thirty~ minutes until the train to Canterlot departs from Ponyville Station. Warning! Twilight, you are approaching the ..." The small illusion chanted, pausing slightly as it enunciated the time, before Twilight waved a hoof through it. "Delay warning for ~ten~ minutes or dismiss?"

“Delay, delay.” The purple alicorn grumbled, giving Cherilee an apologetic look as the illusion disappeared with a small ‘pop’ noise. “I’m sorry, Cherilee, I’m going to have cut this short. I need to get the girls to Canterlot before tomorrow morning for yet another potential world-shaking disaster nopony decided we needed to know about, as usual, and I have to meet up with Luna back at the library to make sure the Crusaders know they have to look after Fluttershy’s cottage for a few days.”

“We’re letting the Crusaders take over Fluttershy’s cottage? I’ll have to let Mayor Mare know the apocalypse is coming earlier than scheduled this week.” Cherilee feigned a swoon, to which Twilight laughed and threw a muffin-wrapper at the other mare in protest.

“Well, we’re hoping the task of looking after all those animals will tucker them out too much to, well, you know.” Twilight pointed out, before getting up … and finding herself staring at Cherilee, on her back and with her ‘goods’ on full display, the teacher grinning back up at Twilight.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

“W-wuh-well I’ve got to go, busy Princess stuff and all.” Stammering furiously, Twilight tottered for the exit, keeping wide, panicking eyes on Cherilee as the earth pony stretched and curled in ways that the equine body surely should not have been able to do without doing severe damage to itself, contorting herself into a position that made Twilight’s eyes nearly pop out of their skull.

“You know, Twilight, you never did give me a proper answer from last time. Did you want to … be my naughty, naughty little student?” Cherilee purred, slinking off the table and towards Twilight with a smouldering look on her face and a definite waggle to her hips. “For all you learned from a book, I’m willing to bet there’s quite a few things you can’t learn between sheets of paper, but rather between sheets of silk?”

Twilight responded with a particularly articulate series of squeaks and coughing noises, wings shooting out from her back and her hooves flailing wildly in the air before she remembered to breath and shouted back.

“Havetogosavetheworldandtalktomarefriendaboutaccursedsexappealbye!”

Taking off into the air at top speed, Twilight made it about a hundred foot into the air before a shout of joy made her head whip around and her rocketing ascension turn into a fumbling hover as scores of reporters came flapping their way, cameras and note-pads at the ready.

“Can I not have five minutes of peace from you damn vultures?” Twilight shouted, stress, frustration and panic wearing down her natural shyness and sense of decorum as she gathered the magic for another invisibility sphere as the mob of paparazzi came screaming towards her.

“NO!” the mob shouted back, before squawking in dismay as their target rippled in the air and then vanished, the paparazzi dispersing to check the clouds and the bushes, and one nosy reporter popping his head into a window in the school-house, only to be sent packing by a duster that powdered the stallion’s face with multi-coloured chalk-dust.

Chuckling, Cherilee went to the window and leaned out it, watching as a strangely Alicorn-shaped hole punched it’s way through a cloud high above the swarm of blue-balled reporters, smiling as she imagined her flustered prey’s face.

“That wasn’t a no, Twilight.” The school-teacher whispered to herself as she pulled her head back inside the building and lifted a hoof to pull the window down, only to pause as she thought back to something Twilight had said.

“A marefriend, is it? Time to talk to the club, and see who has dared to lay hooves on our sweet little Twilight without going through us first …”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“THE SHIPPING WILL LAST FOREVER!” Cadence bellowed, sitting upright from the bed, eyes wide open but unseeing, before collapsing back onto the inn’s bed and began mumbling and giggling in her sleep once again.

“Sir?” Adamant whispered, having ducked behind a handy couch when his monarch had begun talking and giggling in her sleep, the crystal pony’s eyes barely emerging from behind the flimsy barricade.

“No idea, but keep the tranquilizers handy.” Shining Armor grunted, lifting a hoof to pull a pillow off his horn that had been propelled into his face at high speed by Cadence’s wing when she’s bolted upright in bed. “Has anypony seen Flash Sentry? We could do with a sacrificial offering, and I think he’s just about earned that role by now.”

“Sir, the last we saw him, Private Flash Sentry had holed up in the foyer and was keeping the reporters from coming up the stairwell to intrude on Princess Cadence’s privacy.” One of the other Crystal Guards whispered from the other side of the room, where the two crystal ponies had embraced each other seconds after Cadence’s sleep-shouting had begun. “Permission to go aid him, sir?”

“Permission granted, no sense in more of us being traumatized than absolutely necessary.” The Royal Consort said, closing his eyes and counting to ten before taking another breath as his normally-stalwart ponies fled the room like cats fleeing a kennel full of dogs. “Adamant, remind me when we get back to Canterlot that I willingly married Cadence, would you?”

“O-of course, sir! But I’m sure this is just some … some temporary anomaly!” The diamond-coated crystal pony gave Shining the most tearful, puppy-dog-eyes look that Shining had seen since the time a filly by the name of Twilight had messed up a hair-growth spell and caused all her fur to fall out at once.

“I’m not divorcing my wife, Adamant. But after today’s debacle, she’s on the Royal Couch for at least a week after this.” The white-coated stallion sighed and took a long look at the hole his horn had punched in the pillow, before throwing the ruined cushion back onto the bed with a frustrated sigh. “And I have to keep my head in the game, because when we get back to Canterlot tomorrow, I need to take Princess Celestia to task about using my own sister as bait to get Cadence and I out of Canterlot.”

“Is … is that wise, sir?”

“If one were wise, good Adamant, one would never get involved with Alicorns.”

Chapter 73

Chapter 73

The afternoon found the Bearers reunited, and Rarity found herself being delightfully smothered by her friends, even as the Thestrals who had so kindly flown her to the train station grumbled about a dog-pile of Mares on their charge not making carrying her any easier. The illusions that Twilight had crafted to disguise everypony, from the Bearers to the Royal and Night Guard, had been discarded once the purple Alicorn had conjured up an invisibility sphere big enough for them all to hide in, from which the party had had to pause the apology-fest for a few minutes as a mob of deranged and desperate-looking paparazzi came storming through the train-station, shouting for the Princesses to reveal themselves and knocking over trash-cans and flinging open toilet-stall doors in their furious search for a scandal, before fleeing for their lives when the station-master had come barrelling out of his office, fire-hose gripped firmly in his mouth and bloody murder written across his face at the flagrant descration of his domain.

Fluttershy, of course, had been an absolute balm to Rarity’s frayed nerves, a constant soothing presence of reassurance and absolution, but Applejack’s boisterous greeting and heartfelt apology had been both an unexpected and very welcome surprise, which had made her own apologies flow far more easier than the fashionista had feared she would be able to.

Pinkie, being Pinkie, had simply nodded, smiled and shoved a cupcake down Rarity’s throat, and then into the faces of the Thestrals for good measure. Rarity was happy enough to know that her friends had been as distraught over the blasted cake incident as she was to ignore the fact her makeup had been smudged by the forceful application of baked goods to her muzzle. A more in-depth apology-session would have to wait, however, until after their latest mission to Canterlot was over and done-with.

“So as far as we know, darlings, the Mother of Stones will be arriving in Canterlot by tomorrow morning?” Rarity tried to break up cycle of tears, apologies and hugs before her escorts were crushed, with limited success, as only Twilight took a step back out of the pile, wiping a tear out of her eye with a wing-tip before speaking.

“As far as Luna was able to get out of the Elements, the Mother of Stones is arriving tomorrow. If that’s in the morning, the mid-day or the evening, I don’t know, but considering that Honesty mentioned she was coming from Down Unda? To make it to Canterlot from the other side of the planet in under twelve hours, she’d have to be moving at least four times the speed of a Sonic Rainboom, continuously, to make it in time. That’s a full twelve hours at the very least to make it to Canterlot by 6am tomorrow, and she’s already been travelling for a few hours by now.”

“Not entirely sure I’m happy about being outpaced by a rock, but from the sounds of it, we’re talking a super-rock, right?” Rainbow grumbled, her sling-confined leg forcing the Pegasus to accept the aid of Moonbeam to carry her luggage to the train-station. A fact that Rarity had to admit she enjoyed for less than friendly reasons given how the two mares seemed to jump apart and glare at each other every time they bumped into each other under their loads.

“The Mother is not a rock … but she’s also stone. It’s … difficult to explain in equish, you don’t have the right words for it.” The ‘odd’ pony out of their enlarged group, an annoyingly beautiful and elegant-looking pegasus Mare that was, shockingly enough, the disguise that Kindness had donned for the trip, explain hesitantly. The fact ‘she’ looked like Fluttershy and Fleur De Lis had had a child together that had inherited and magnified all the desirable traits of both mothers also irked Rarity mightily, but at least Kindness seemed to have adopted Fluttershy’s trait of hiding behind her own mane, and crippling shyness to boot.

“Bluntly speaking, the Mother of Stones is the mantle of Equis. She’s the very bedrock upon which we all walk, and provides the necessary buffer between us and the molten core of the world to avoid us all being flash-fried on the spot.” The Lunar Princess sighed and rubbed at her muzzle with a wing, where a nasty looking bruise was slowly fading under the effects of a healing spell. The Crusaders had been otherwise engaged with Luna had gone to tell them they were looking after Fluttershy’s cottage for a few days, and Luna’s shriek when encountering the Crusaders involved in the middle of a private moment had startled the girls, whose first instinct had been to flee the sound of a Royal Canterlot Voice-powered scream, and in the ensuing chaos of three entangled ponies all trying to scatter in different directions amidst a very cluttered kitchen table-surface, one of Spike’s beloved pans had somehow gone flying in the direction of the Lunar Princess and bonked her square on the muzzle. “It would be more apt to say the Mother is gathering her consciousness in a single place, and will then extrude an avatar to speak to us directly. And considering her consciousness is spread across the entire planet and is occupied with hundreds of small matters at all times, it will take considerable effort on her behalf to focus enough of herself in one place to be able to handle two rogue Elements of Harmony, who despite being cut-off from their Bearers are still brimming with the power of Harmony and could cause us trouble before our trial is over.”

“But Honesty said something about Down Unda? Why, if she’s spread across the world, would Down Unda be suffering earth quakes?” Twilight turned and gave Luna, then ‘Kindness’, then the mane-pin where Rarity had stashed laughter in a small, elegant platinum setting, before scowling. “That doesn’t make sense.”

“That’s simple! The Uluru is a node where the Mother’s core reaches beyond the surface of the planet, and it’s one of the few places where we can get a signal to her directly, without having to send our messages through the Leylines, so that was where we sent our message, and that’s where she started to get angry first.” Laughter pipped up, and Rarity’s ears twitched, as did the rest of the gathered ponies except Kindess, continuing on in a rapid-fire manner of speaking that left no chance to interrupt. “It’s also one of the few places mortals can commune with her directly without the Mother needing to produce an Avatar, so the Down Undans consider it a sacred place and tend to keep outsiders away from the site unless there’s a great need or the Mother tells them otherwise. And since we want to fix this problem right now, we can’t really wait the two weeks it would take to fly you all by zeppelin to Down Unda, so the Mother of Stones is making a special trip to Canterlot, just for you!”

“…Wow. Is that what it’s like when I just start talking?” Pinkie said in a dazed voice as the party blinked and stared at the talking ornament in Rarity’s mane, several finding themselves with forelimbs raised up to stroke the ornament before awkwardly lowering the offending limbs.

“Kinda? Ah guess? Ah don’t wanna take yah home an’ pet the ever-lovin’ heck outta yah when you do that, however.” Applejack mumbled, her gaze flicking from Laughter to ‘Kindness’ and then to the ‘jewellery’ that Kindness was wearing, where Loyalty and Honesty both hung as pendants from a simple length of twisted silver wire. “An’ ain’t the other Elements comin’ out? Gotta few questions fer Honesty, an’ a long flight t’Canterlot would be a good place to ask ‘em.”

“Most of our power is being used to keep Magic and Generosity subdued. Generosity is relatively easy, given that It severed it’s connection to Rarity willingly to try and force a connection with Twilight, but Magic keeps trying to draw upon Twilight’s own connec …on Twilight, and we have to spend a lot of our attention on stopping that.” Kindness explained, hesitating and withdrawing behind her mane in an eerily similar fashion to Fluttershy’s normal mannerisms.

“If I might change the subject back to our trip … I want a flyer in each carriage with each Bearer. Rainbow Dash has a broken leg so she can’t be expected to catch anypony if something happens, and Fluttershy tends to freeze up at the height we’ll be achieving today.” Twilight coughed loudly and drew everypony’s attention back to her. “So, for today, we’ll be taking the train halfway to Canterlot, at which point the train will be stopping at an old maintenance depo, where Canterlot Command has dispatched six flying carriages. Once we arrive there, which should take about two hours by train, we’ll be dividing everypony up, and I will be casting several enchantments on the pegasi who will be pulling the chariots to enhance their speed so we can get to Canterlot on time.”

“Majesty, forgive us for speaking out of turn, but the Night Guard is perfectly capable of pulling the chariots.” One of the ‘spare’ Thestrals said, ignoring the glares that the earth-pony Royal Guards sent his way.

“Yes, I’m well aware a Thestral has just as much wing-power as a Pegasus, but you are nocturnal by nature and I want you all on standby on the off-chance that the chariots’ levitation enchantments fail, or we hit turbulence and somepony gets thrown overboard.” Twilight turned and gave the thestral a small, apologetic smile, and Rarity lifted an eyebrow in surprise as the bat-like stallion fumbled and smiled goofily like a colt who had just been given a treat. A far cry from the stoic but reliable façade she had come to know in her short time with the Night Guard.

And the way the rest of the Guards, Night and Royal alike, turned positively murderous glares on the unlucky Thestral also made the wheels start turning in Rarity’s head.

“And, my loyal Guards, I want you rested and ready to grab a Bearer and bolt for the castle if Canterlot Command fails to accurately follow Twilight’s plan and we’re mobbed by the paparazzi.” Princess Luna added, thwapping the goofily-grinning guard with a wing, which seemingly switched his ‘Guard’ instincts back on and he assumed a parade-stance, blushing furiously. “Twilight will be able to gather us up into an invisibility sphere, and I can create some short-lived illusions to take our places in the chariots to make sure the camera-wielding leeches have something else to latch onto other than us. If it doesn’t completely get rid of them, at least it will halve the number of parasites getting between us and my sister.”

“Well, ah can’t say there’s much else to say. We catch the train, get off at our stop an’ then fly the rest o’ the way to Canterlot to bamboozle them damn nosy reporters. Seems simple enough.” Rarity sighed and shook her head as much as she could in her cast at Applejack’s words.

“Being a heavy consumer of their work, I can tell you it won’t be, Applejack. With the surrender of the Changeling Queen and Princess Celestia wearing armor around the castle now, I suspect we might have an easier time of getting into Canterlot … but an absolutely wretched time getting to Canterlot Castle.” The immobilized fashionista cautioned as the faint whine of a train’s warning whistle became audible. “I really hope your spells are better than ever, Twilight, because I wouldn’t put it past some of the magazines to have some positively exotic cameras working the skies around the castle on the off-chance they can get a scandalous shot of royalty.”

“After what happened with the Changelings, I made sure my invisibility sphere spell is top-notch. Unless Stump, Murdock or the Muckraker family have access to Princess Celestia’s private spell-library, not just the Canterlot Archives, then we should be fine. It’s a five-layered prismatic barrier with interwoven …”

Rarity simply smiled and put on her best ‘appreciative’ face as her eyes trailed over her friends. Applejack looked excited, subtly shifting from hoof to hoof even as she ignored Twilight’s monologue about her spell-craft, while Rainbow Dash seemed … hesitant, perhaps even fearful, her head hanging low and her broken leg held tightly to her barrel in a clear display of nerves. Fluttershy appeared to be more interested in a soft, whispered conversation with Luna, of all ponies, but Rarity caught a few whispers of ‘Crusaders’ ‘birth control’ and ‘animals’ as Twilight stopped to draw breath, and Pinkie … was colouring something. With a box of crayons that had appeared out of nowhere.

It is good to be back. We’re on the right path to heal this nasty scar on our friendship, at least, and everypony is willing to admit to their faults in it. The fashionista sighed and resigned herself to only a few more days of being carried around like a Princess by her Thestral bodyguards as the train rounded the last bend before Ponyville Station, a pillar of steam shrieking out the top of its smokestack.

If Rarity had been paying attention to the ponies around her other than her friends, she might have seen Kindness’s look of concern and nervousness as the ponified Element looked over the immobilized unicorn, before the elegant face withdrew behind it’s flowing mane once more as the Night and Royal Guards began the arduous task of loading up the train with the Bearers’ luggage before the paparazzi returned to investigate the train’s arrival for signs of their prey.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Really, Princess, that was entirely unnecessary. I haven’t seen a pony this terrified of you since the time Lean Cuisine tried to convince you that dessert pastries are not part of a balanced diet.” Celestia sulked in her corner and refused to answer, horn-tip pressed tightly into the plaster molding that masked where the two walls came together, as Bedside Manner, Royal Physician, tended to the paralyzed form of Dappled Light, prodding the hapless Unicorn repeatedly in a variety of places to try and convince the tightly curled-up stallion to unfold, or at the very least stop making the barely-audible, high-pitched whine of distress that he’d been making for the past few hours.

“Be that as it may, doctor, any chance of removing this infernal collar?” Dawn Ray grunted, struggling with the brace around his neck and the bandages around his horn before a look from the Royal Physician convinced the old war-horse to stop fiddling with them. “I’m hardly going to inspire the troops when I look like a dog that’s just been neutered with this infernal cone of shame on me!”

“No. You strained your neck because you rushed your flight-spell and forgot to compensate for inertia, and since unicorn magic focuses around the horn, your horn, skull and neck took the brunt of the whiplash when the spell took effect and tried to drag you into the air via your horn.” The meek-natured doctor turned and gave Dawn Ray a sour look as the warhorse fussed with his brace again. “You’re very lucky you didn’t do yourself any damage worse than a few strained muscles and ripping all of the velvet off your horn, especially at your age. Poor Dappled here, however, is going to need therapy after … whatever it was that our Princess did to him wears off.”

Princess Celestia turned her head around, gouging a long scar in the plaster with her horn, snorted at the assembled stallions, and then turned her focus back to the oh-so-interesting blank white plastered corner, leaving a second, equally-deep gouge in the wall.

“…What exactly caused all of this?” The Royal Physician asked softly, leaning in close to Dawn Ray.

“We were discussing, IN PRIVATE …” Dawn Ray snapped loudly at Princess Celestia, who snorted again into her corner and lashed her tail in response but nothing else. “… ahem, in private, any potential contraband young Dappled Light might possess, and the poor stallion couldn’t bring himself to talk about it in the presence of his Princess. So after she left the room, I managed to get him talking and …”

The aging warhorse shot a pitying look to the whimpering stallion in a fetal position that still lay on Bedside Manner’s operating table.

“… and he mentioned he might have possessed banned reading material of a salacious nature involving actresses portraying both of the Princesses in acts of lewd nature. At which point Celestia came back into the room, having been listening in with a pair of enchanted crystals, and proceeded to, well, whatever it was she did to Dappled Light. I …” Dawn Ray reached up with a hoof and tapped his bandaged horn gingerly. “ … I chose discretion as the greater part of valor and ended up in this situation.”

The skinny Royal Physician turned and gave a scathing look towards the young Stallion, his lips curling into a contemptuous sneer for several moments before Bedside Manner apparently regained control over his emotions.

“Well, I can understand the Princess’s motives a lot better now. I would suggest that our young … patient … have some time to himself to meditate on his sins, but I do hope you’ll cure him of any such designs on the Princesses.”

“I hardly think the lad’s in any condition to chase after a mare of any type or pedigree, given the way the poor bastard’s empathic ability works, but the training course I have in mind will either turn him into upstanding Royal Guard or kill him outright.” Dawn Ray said after eying the Royal Physician with some concern. Bedside Manner had a reputation for being entirely passive in everything, and his reaction to Dappled Light had been anything but. “He’s young, foolish and feels like he has been betrayed by everypony around him because of the way his empathic abilities work. Having the Princess come storming back into the room with murder written across her face after we interrogated him and dragged his career over hot coals was probably the final straw for his nerves.”

“I am not that scary.” A faint, grumpy voice complained from the far corner of the room.

“Princess, with all due respect, you’re three times his size, plus you’re his Goddess, his Princess and his Supreme Overlord, in that order. Yes, you are that scary, but normally you come across as so kind and maternal that most ponies don’t really remember the other three things. Which, if I might add, is also the primary reason we have so many problems with the old bloodlines of Unicornia being such massive pains in our collective flanks.” The acting Royal Guard Captain pointed out, and was rewarded with a baleful look before the Princess turned her face back into the corner, gouging another two lines into the plaster covering the walls in the process.

“Hmm, yes, well, the only thing this stallion needs is some peace and quiet and some respect for his betters. I expect you’ll dealing with the latter, but for now, leaving this young fool in a quiet place for a while will do him more good than harm.”

“We were all young once, Bedside.”

“Youth and lust are no excuse for such … uncouth behaviour. Especially towards a Princess.”

“Oh, so you’re the only stallion in history who never played polish the polearm when you were Dappled’s age?”

“Masturbation is a perfectly normal thing. To do so imagining one’s Goddess, however, speaks to me of a diseased mind clutching for …”

“Gentleponies … have this conversation elsewhere.” Princess Celestia grated in a voice that could have caused boulders to turn to gravel on command, turning her head and gouging yet another line into the plaster, this one with heat-blackened edges, and fixed a twitching eye on the three stallions. “The last thing I need, ontop of all that has happened and what will be happening tomorrow when my former pupil and the most powerful Elemental on Equuis descend on me in a frenzy, is to be reminded that some of my own little ponies get their jollies imagining me muzzle deep in my own sister.”

Sharing a look that only males who have spent long periods of time around the females of their species can achieve, the two conscious and mobile stallions swallowed their arguments, and their pride, gathered up the fear-paralyzed Dappled Light between them, and scuttled from the room with as much grace and dignity as a pair of field-mice fleeing from an exceptionally angry dragon.

“Uh … did she just kick us out of your office, Beside?” Dawn Ray whispered as the two mis-matched stallions levitated the hapless Dappled Light away from his immenient doom.

“My office in her castle, Dawn Ray.” The Royal Physician shot back, giving the paralyzed young Stallion a dire look before sighing and shaking his head in dismay.

“Hmph. Point taken.” The Acting Captain grumbled, then shot a look at the immobilized Stallion in the combined telekinetic grip of himself and Bedside Manner. “That said, I really should return this poor bastard to his captor.”

“You think it wise to return an Empath to the clutches of the Changelings, especially one with such a rare and disturbingly potent gift? The Magi still haven’t fully understood how the Changelings’ magic works, and the bug-ponies are a very powerful telepathic species …” Bedside Manner pointed out, releasing his telekinetic grip on Dappled, which made Dawn Ray grunt as the full weight of the young stallion rested upon his strained horn. “I have concerns that if Dappled’s gift intersects with the Changelings’ hive-mind, we could be facing a real disaster. Imagine how deadly the Changelings could become if we literally did not care that they were invading, courtesy of this young fool’s ability? They could enslave every pony in Equestria and nobody would be able to stop them!”

“The Changeling Queen has been subjected to a variety of spells that force her to tell the truth, and you’ve seen her medical records. A stray kitten fart could kill Chrysalis right now, and her Hive would fall prey to dementia and then die shortly afterwards, plus she decided to bind her Hive to non-aggression through a spell invoking a blood pact, so even if Chrysalis did try something of the sort, there’s very little actual mischief the Changelings as a whole could get up to.”

Straining as he levitated Dappled Light onto his back, Dawn Ray gave the Royal Physician a wan look, noting how the normally-placcid doctor’s features seemed to strain with anger and frustration.

“Doctor, you know that the Princess always preaches about redemption over revenge. Here and now we have the first real, and maybe only, chance to make peace with the Changeling race and integrate them into Equestria. We can end any further risks or wars with the Changelings by bringing them under our protection as friends, rather than risk having them skulking around in the background and causing all manner of trouble.”

“I am well aware of our Princess’s teachings, Captain, and I do not need a refresher course on them. I simply believe it unwise to leave an empath that lacks the proper respect for our Princess in the tender care of beings who have attempted to usurp her throne no less than three times already.”

“Perhaps … but I also don’t think it wise to have the little Changeling, who was making the most adorable sad puppy-dog eyes at me when I came to take Dappled Light away for his interrogation, wandering through the castle looking for him if and when Princess Cadence and Shining Armor return from their, ahem, unscheduled trip to Ponyville.”

“Terrific. He’ll probably make the Changeling assume Princess Celestia’s form, and the media’s vultures will probably get wind of it. Not only will we be dealing with Ponies erroneously assuming our Princess has carnal relations with any random Stallion, but it will probably makes Ponies think Changelings can serve as a suitable vessel for their deviant fantasies and the entire species will be condemned to being propositioned by every lonely sex-pest in the country.”

“Errr … speaking of which, you mentioned there’s a lot of similarities between Changelings and Ponies. Do you think it’s possible for the two species to interbreed? Because I got the distinct impression it’s the Changeling pursuing the Pony in this situation, and given the odd nature of Queen Chrysalis’s offspring …”

“You fear they might be Shining Armor’s illegitimate bastards? That is my concern as well, for several reasons, but the Princess refuses to allow me to draw blood to test that theory.” Bedside Manner stopped walking, and it took Dawn Ray a second to stop the forward momentum of the levitated Dappled Light so he wouldn’t get whacked in the sore neck by the floating, paralyzed stallion. “Any spells to determine the parentage of the offspring I might cast would be worthless without a blood sample, since such magic is designed to work on purely equine species … and the Changelings are just a little too far removed from us for the spell to give a result that would be legally acceptable without a blood sample to help identify the father’s identity. For all we know, she’s just forcing her offspring to have Equine features to throw us off our game, since our current level of detection spells only function when a Changeling changes shape. Or they could belong to anypony she’s seduced between the Canterlot Invasion and her last encounter with Princess Twilight.”

“Yes, well, I’m more concerned about what Princess Cadence would do if she hears her mortal enemy has had children with her beloved husband before she has. If Princess Celestia keeps upholding the protection of the Changelings under her roof and Princess Cadence gets angry enough to cut off contact … well, history has shown that when the leader of the Crystal Empire goes off the deep end, things end poorly for the rest of Equuis.”

Bedside manner shot Dawn Ray a startled look before speaking. “And somehow showing her another Changeling in a relationship with a Pony will aid with that?”

“Well, from what I’ve been able to gather, this idiot of a Stallion is well meaning but somewhat stunted, emotionally speaking, given his empathic talent causes the beings around him to ignore his existence. The Changeling, on the other hoof, seems to be fixated on him romantically.” Dawn Ray explained as the two Stallions made their way to the ‘red rooms’, where the Changelings were being housed, the acting Captain nodding to the stoic-faced Royal Guards who saluted at their presence and advanced. “Pardon me, Bedside. I am acting Captain of the Royal Guard, Dawn Ray, authorisation code eleven-twelve-alpha-mayflower.”

“Very good sir, but we’ll need confirmation …” One of the Guards said firmly, holding his spear in the crook of one foreleg while his companion glared down at Beside Manner, while the Royal Physician stared back unblinking.

“Of course. Wiffle-piffle poly-piffle, my dearest puppy has the sniffles.” Dawn Ray said in a sing-song voice, turning a fully circle as he recited the ditsy little rhyme.

Bedside Manner’s jaw nearly hit the ground as the two Royal Guards saluted and returned to their positions, guarding the entrance to the chambers where the Changelings were ensconced.

“Oh don’t give me that look! Besides, with little we know about how Changeling magic works outside of shape-changing and how our, ahem, guests can mimic a target almost perfectly with just a casual glance, we decided that that a second layer of authentication was required for anypony with the authority to order the Guards away from their posts was required. Besides, what infiltrator would expect a Royal Captain to say something silly like that, just to enter the wing where we’re stashing the Changelings?”

“And we are going to give an Empath back to the Hive, to a female Changeling who has possible romantic intentions towards him, and whose Queen might just have produced half-blood spawn. And you see nothing dangerous with this?”

“I see plenty of danger, doctor. But I also see hope, and a chance for something better than constant mistrust and doubt between our species. Hope that Dappled Light can be more than just an embittered loner, hope that the Changelings can successfully integrate into our society without causing harm or chaos.” Dawn Ray gave the Royal Physician a small, sad smile as they entered the Red Rooms, and a small, familiar Changeling came scuttling out of a room, a look of nervous concern plastered clearly across her features as she caught sight of the paralyzed Stallion caught in Dawn Ray’s telekinetic grip. “Hope, Bedside, is what keeps us going even in the darkest of times. Without it, what do we have left to fight for?”

Chapter 74

CHAPTER 74

Discord had to admit that since this ‘entanglement’ with Celestia had begun, he hadn’t really been bored. Oh, not that he didn’t have moments of calm and peace, but for the first time in … ever, it didn’t feel annoying to not be rampaging around and spreading Chaos across the world. Their relationship was chaotic enough to satisfy his need to cause Chaos, but there was just something that was so nice about being around Celestia.

Now was not one of the nice things he’d come to enjoy, but still, something within Discord compelled him to remain at Celestia’s side as the white Alicorn dragged a brush harshly through her coat, grumbling under her breath. He’d popped in from prowling the Castle grounds looking for ponies to prank to find Celestia grumping away in her private quarters, and when he finally managed to get her to talk to him, she’d explained in short, clipped sentences that she was tired, she had a long day tomorrow, could he go away, bloody stallions, in that order.

In short, Discord didn’t quite understand, and so he’d asked for an explanation. A glare and a deep, shuddering sigh later, Celestia asked Discord to sit next to her and began to explain, in excruciating detail, just how bad her day had gotten.

Learning the most powerful Empath in living memory happened to be a lonely, embittered pervert who liked something Celestia called ‘Sis-cest’. That Twilight Sparkle was, according to the Royal Agents assigned to watch over Ponyville, on ‘the warpath’ about Celestia’s subtle behind-the-scenes prodding to get the young Unicorn to ascend into an Alicorn. About how two of the Elements had apparently gone rogue, and the Mother of Stones was about to literally crash the party to get to the bottom of it all. And each revelation cracked Celestia’s grumpy façade to reveal a mare deeply hurt by the implication that Twilight no longer trusted her.

“A-and there’s no way I’ll get a ch-chance to sit down with Twilight and talk it out with all of this happening!” Celestia sniffled, now leaning heavily against Discord as the Chimera-like being stroked her mane in what he hoped was a comforting fashion, while the tuft of fur that capped the end of his tail plucked another tissue from the rapidly-emptying box and offered it to the Solar Princess, who took it and blew her nose. Noisily. Messily. If boogers hadn’t been involved, Discord would have been charmed. “Spuh-Spike says he’s nuh-never seen Twilight so angry!”

“Easy, easy, I’m sure if you can get Twilight to talk with you in private, you’ll make her see it was all alright.” Discord murmured, sighing as Celestia sniffled again and nodded half-heartedly. “Yes, she’s going to yell and be angry, but you’re like a second mother to her, I doubt she can be mad forever, not if you take the inniative and remind your little purple-nurple that you’ve been waiting in the wings every step of the way, to swoop in and save the day if her ‘trials’ ever threatened her or her friends, ever since you sent her off to Ponyville in the first place.”

“Bu-but the Mother of Stones will be here!” Celestia all but wailed and leaned so heavily into Discord he grunted as an Alicorn-sized shoulder buried itself into his rib-cage. “And the rogue Elements of Harmony have to be dealt with! By the time everything gets settled, I’ll have had to speak to her as a fellow Princess, and not as her teacher, and th-then …”

“Ap-ap-ap-ap-ap! None of that! Now, I’m no expert on this ‘friendship’ stuff, but I would make sure you’re there to greet Twilight at the station, rather than waiting for her to come to you. Greet her, teleport her and her friends directly to the castle and I think you should be able to convince the Mother of Stones that you need a chance to spend a few minutes with a newly Ascended Immortal, yes?”

Sniffling, Celestia nodded slowly, staring up at Discord’s face with watery eyes.

“And yes, Twilight is upset, but if she sees you’re upset too, maybe she’ll be more willing to listen to you when you’re trying to explain she was never in any real danger?”

Celestia nodded again, this time more confidently.

“So, here’s my pitch: I grab the Mother of Stones when she arrives, let her know you’re trying to help your newly-Ascended friend deal with some baggage, get the Elements of Harmony to her, you get a few minutes of relative sanity with Twilight to try and convince her everything is not exploding in her face, then we solve the issue of those irritating little stones before something else goes wrong, and not in a fun way.”

“That … that would actually be great, Discord. The council that oversees my Royal Agents told me that Twilight had ordered them to arrange a number of chariots sent to an old train supply-station to pick up her group, and to leave a hole in our aerial defence network to allow the Bearers to sneak into Canterlot while on those chariots.” The Solar Princess rubbed at her chin with a gilded hoof, leaning back into Discord again, but this time feeling more like a large mare and less like a boulder of despair and misery, as Discord’s ribs gratefully informed him. “I can wait for the Elements to reach the rendezvous point, teleport them directly to Castle and bypass the flight entirely and spend some t-time with Twilight and Luna before the Mother of Stones arrives.”

Discord nodded and wrapped his eagle-claw around Celestia’s shoulder and gave it a light squeeze, something he’d seen done by Ponies he’d snooped on before when somebody close to them felt down, and was rewarded with a relieved sigh from the Alicorn of the Sun.

“If it will be of any help, I can distract the rest of them for as long as I can? It has been a while since I saw Fluttershy, and I’m sure I can have something to say to the Elements …”

A soft, throaty chuckle emerged from Celestia’s now-smiling muzzle before it leaned up to nuzzle into the underside of his neck.

“No food-fights with the Elements in-front of the children, but yes, I’m sure now that the Elements have broken … huh, broken a great many things, their oaths of silence amongst them, that they’ll finally be willing to talk about what the hell happened during Luna’s exile, and why they seem to have a fetish for turning things into stone.”

“I have a few things to ask them myself, but that’ll probably have to wait till all the serious stuff is out of the way.” Discord replied, leaning into Celestia’s touch and savouring the still-new feeling of closeness to another being. “Why the Powers have invested so much of their influence in this world, why the Gods keep trying to lay claim to Equis when it is clear that the Powers have staked their claim and thus the Gods are undertaking a blatant violation of the pact, how come I haven’t heard a peep out of any of my ‘parents’ in … a few hundred millennia, that sort of thing.”

“Just because the Elements have a direct connection to the Powers doesn’t mean they can speak directly to the Powers.”

“True, but I used to be a part of the Powers. If I can just make a connection, I should be able to get their attention, even if only for a few moments.”

“What … what would happen to you if you did make the connection, Discord?” A gilded hoof snuck around and pulled Discord even closer to Celestia. “You wouldn’t disappear, would you? Reabsorbed back into the Powers?”

The serpentine chimera blinked, looked down at Celestia and blinked again. “Reabsorbed? Uh … I’m not just some blob of Chaos that got stuck in this layer of reality, I chose to come here, and in doing so my nature changed significantly to be able to remain on this layer. Even if I did try to rejoin them, it would be nearly impossible, I’m simply too different, too … mortal-ish, especially these days.”

“That puts me at ease. I had a sudden thought that if you contacted the Powers, I would lose you …” The Solar Princess mumbled, nuzzling the underside of Discord’s jaw as her hooves pulled Discord against her and held the Aspect of Chaos close.

“I’m going nowhere, I promise you that, Cellie.” The serpentine chimera promised, finding himself oddly serious about that promise. Whatever this ‘relationship’ stuff was doing to him, it certainly wasn’t boring and it certainly had more than it’s share of chaotic messes to keep him entertained. And the snuggling with Celestia, a being he’d long pegged as boringly orderly and had found her to be quite spontaneous, was a most welcome, if unlooked for, bonus as well.

“And that, my Dissy, is all I need to hear.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So …”

“… So.”

Applejack and Fluttershy held each other’s eyes for a few seconds before both blushed and looked away, shifting awkwardly in place as the rattling of the train along the tracks filled the empty silence. Due to the way the carriage had been laid out, there hadn’t been enough room for everypony to cram into the main room, especially with Rarity needing two fully-grown thestral Stallions to carry her about, and the remainder of said Stallions refusing to leave the side of their Princess, who in turn refused to leave the side of Twilight.

Which had ended up with Applejack and Fluttershy drawing the short-straw and being asked to ‘keep watch’ for reporters. Not that anypony could keep up with a train at full-steam for long, which left the two Mares stuck watching the scenery whizzing by and trying to make small-talk without bringing up how they’d rutted each other silly.

And they’d been on watch for nearly an hour …

“This ain’t workin’ … ‘Shy, Faust knows ah’m sorry ah forced m’self on you an’ Zecora. Was plum gone half outta my mind on them afro-de-zee-acks, an’ ah’m not too sure on what ah was doin’ ‘sides tryin’ to get ‘way from mah brother before we, erm, lived up to some stereotypes.” Swallowing the ball of nervousness back down into her belly, Applejack pulled her hat off her head, crushed it to her chest and gave her full attention to Fluttershy. “Ah’ll unnerstan’ if’n you don’t want anythin’ to do with me, but please, it’s plain as day that you ‘n’ Mac are sweet on each other like bees are to honey. Don’t be pushin’ him away jus’ cause he’s mah brother. Ah’ll stay well outta your way, ah promise.”

Half-hiding behind her pink mane, the butter-coloured Pegasus squeaked, then poked her head out from behind the barrier of hair to speak.

“N-no, that’s not what I … oh. No, I di-didn’t mind, Applejack. I … uhm, promise you won’t be mad?”

“Sugarcube, ah could never stay mad at you for long … and after that mornin’? Can’t rightly say ah’ve the right to stay mad at anythin’ you say.”

Gnawing on her bottom lip for several seconds, Fluttershy finally took a deep, shuddering breath and spoke, for her at least, in a loud, clear voice. Which translated into slightly above a whisper for most ponies.

“You … have you ever wondered how I make the bits to feed the animals who come to my cottage? Pay for their medication and the bandages? Pay for my own food, water, electricity and the taxes on my land and cottage?”

Applejack looked at Fluttershy. Not in shock, or surprise, or disbelief. Just looked.

This was a mare who braved the company of monstrous creatures that made even Royal Guards tremble, and with a kind hoof and a gentle song rather than brandishing weapons and battlecries. She could sing like an angel, had the body of a super-model and the grace of a dancer. And yet apart from a few disastrous attempts at ‘normal’ jobs, including that one incident with some fancy froo-froo model-scout that had had Rarity and Fluttershy at loggerheads before the end, Applejack had never heard of what Fluttershy did for a living.

“Honestly? Never crossed mah mind. Ain’t gonna pry, so long as yah not involved in somethin’ shady, or somethin’ that could get yah hurt.” Applejack finally managed to say as her mind raced with what options were available in Ponyville … and came up with precious few that would suit a mare with Fluttershy’s personality ‘quirks’.

“I … uhm … supply all of Ponyville’s … uhm … adult novelty goods through a store I own.”

Applejack blinked. Slowly.

“Beg pardon, but did’ja jus’ tell me that yah are the Pony who runs the Glorious Hole store, the Faust-be-damned back-alley store behind Sofa and Quills that sells …”

“Adult novelty goods.”

“Ah was gonna say dildos, inflatable friends an’ dirty magazines, but yeah, let’s go with that.” The orange-coated farm-mare sighed and pulled her much-abused Stetson hat down over her face. “Well, considerin’ how much traffic the place gets, ah’m not surprised y’all can afford to feed so many o’ them critters, but really? Mah always told me it was the quiet ones that yah had to watch.”

Fluttershy was silent for a few seconds before speaking, unwilling to look Applejack in the eye. “Are you … disappointed in me?”

“The wha? Not on yah life, jus’ … kinda shocked. Never thought Fluttershy’d be involved in somethin’ like that. Flames o’ Tartarus, ah’ve even gone in there a few times to, uh, pick up some sock stuffers for when ah hit a mean dry spell.” Chuckling awkwardly, Applejack fanned herself with her hat while she inwardly cringed at realizing that Fluttershy probably remembered, being the kind, courteous and considerate mare that she was, every toy, tool and trinket that Applejack had ever bought from the Glorious Hole. If it was anypony but Fluttershy, Applejack would probably be guilty of murder right now just to assuage herself that nopony knew what really got her apples juiced. “But, y’all are home most of the time, so how …”

“Some of my animal friends run the store when I’m not there so I can look after the sick and orphaned animals. I’ve got Clarice and Tobias the parrots ‘talking’ to each other to make ponies believe there’s a pair of ponies always on site, Ferdinand the Ferret handles the cash register since he’s very good with his paws and can easily shift the bits into the register and push any change under the security screen without exposing his true nature to the customers, and Harry the Bear moves the stock around and makes sure that shoplifters get the fright of their lives. I go in during the afternoons most days to make sure everything is working as intended and to give my staff some time to eat and nap until closing time, and every evening I escort the animals back home to my cottage, and I have signs up …”

“… Yeah, I remember 'em, Sugarcube, ‘no words, just cash’. Just hand the goods over or fill out a form for what you’re after, and the pony on the other side of the wall will put in the order for you.” Sighing, Applejack flopped a fore-leg over Fluttershy’s shoulders, stopping the elegant Pegasus’s babbling and pulled her in for a hug, the delicate mare freezing for a moment before leaning into Applejack’s side. “Damn, but sounds like y’all got a sweet deal going on. Ain’t nopony gonna risk tryin’ to see who’se on the other side o’ that wall if’n they’ll get exposed too, y’all don’t have to pay no wages to animals, an’ ah’d like to see the sucker dumb ‘nough to try an’ rob from a store that’s got a bear for on-site security.”

“I don’t make that much of a profit during most of the year, not really, but in the lead up to spring, and estrus? I make enough to live on for most of the year if I’m frugal with it. And with Twilight investing the bits we get for saving the world every so often? I’ve got a nice little bit of money saved away, and I’m considering having a bigger house built to accommodate all the animals so I can … can have some privacy.”

“Heh, ah can imagine havin’ all those house-guests can … put a … cramp …” Applejack’s voice failed her as she remembered how Fluttershy’s cottage was covered, floor to wall to ceiling, with bird-houses, rat-nests and pet beds.

All of whom had inhabitants. Long-term inhabitants.

All of whom probably watched her rut both Zecora and Fluttershy into the ground, literally, before dragging them up the stairs to Fluttershy’s room to do a victory lap of sexual conquest on her quite-willing-but-exhausted ‘victims’.

“Uh … jus’ how many o’ yer critters saw us …”

“Uhm … all of them? The hamsters said there should have been more hair-pulling and peeing, but otherwise they admire your form?” Still leaning into Applejack, Fluttershy tittered and snuck a wing around Applejack’s flanks as the farm-mare began to wilt. “And, uhm, please don’t tell Big Mac? I kind of want to broach the subject … carefully. I don’t want him to think I’m desperate.”

It took a few moments for Applejack’s brain to kick back into gear, stuck as it was imagining a line of rodents hold up score-cards as Applejack pounded their mistress’s soft, inviting backside into submission, but unfortunately it skipped a few steps and went straight to blunt, rather than polite.

“Ahm thinkin’ he ain’t gonna forget his sister screwed both Zecora an’ yah durin’ a night o’ mad passion.”

“Oh, I’m fine with Big Mac thinking I’m lewd. More than fine, actually. But I don’t want him thinking I’m just some mare that will lift my tail for the nearest stallion, you know? I have needs, but I also have standards.”

Applejack’s mind threatened to unbalance again as she imagined trying to live under the same roof as Big Mac and Fluttershy, who had revealed herself to be quite the adventurous mare in the aftermath of the damn aphrodisiac incident, and very nearly went blank as the stoic farm-mare imagined trying to explain to Applebloom what all the noises, smells and unmentionable devices that would become part and parcel of the house should the two ponies get married … and that brought back memories that right now her sister and the rest of the Crusaders were probably sheath-deep in each other and dancing with becoming teenage mothers, without Cutie Marks even!

“Ah’m … ah got nothin’. So long as Applebloom don’t get tangled up in this, ah’m fine with it.” The farm-mare sighed as Fluttershy giggled again, her wing sliding up to rest around Applejack’s shoulders. “Bad ‘nuff that this stupid perm-afro-dyke stuff is happenin’, an’ the Crusaders are slippin’ each other some sorta magic pickle. Faust knows ah’m sweatin’ bullets over ‘Bloom an’ her friends bein’ dumb, horny young idjits … but ah don’t think mah heart could take it if’n the girls ended up single mothers at their age.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t worry too much. I looked over the recipe and ingredients for Trixie’s morning tea, and it’s a very effective brew based on what I know about herb-lore. And while the aphrodisiacs might make them go into a false estrus, the odds of them successfully conceiving at their age, and out of season, is relatively low.” Fluttershy whispered as the train rounded a bend, and the Pegasus was tipped slightly against Applejack’s shoulder. “Although I don’t know enough about Weeaboo’s Curse to say if that might tip the odds against the girls or not. It seems more like a fetish-y thing than a mass-reproduction mechanism.”

“Uh, Twi’ was sayin’ that the Unicorn who made it was so weird that the rest o’ his people locked ‘im up on an island an’ made him stay there fer centuries. Or maybe it was bein’ locked up on that island that made him weird an’ made him make that spell in the first place. To be honest, ah wasn’t payin’ that much attention ‘bout who made the spell as ah was tryin’ to figure out how to reverse it.”

“Oh … that’s kind of sad either way. But no, I’m talking about having estrogen and testosterone in the same body, specifically concentrated in such large quantities and in such close proximity to each other. That would take … some significant alterations to the body to allow two opposing sets of reproductive organs to be working together, at the same time, and not make the host either sterile or unable to, ah, perform with either set.” Fluttershy coughed and pushed herself away from Applejack with a wing, lifting one hoof to her chin and rubbing at it in thought.

“That’s a lotta big words ah never learned, Sugarcube. An’ quite frankly, ah don’t give a hoot ‘bout what it all means, so long as the girls can go back to normal, an’ the cure won’t do ‘em any harm.”

“Well, I’ve never heard of the Neighponese having any long-term health issues different from the rest of the equine family …”

Applejack turned and gave Fluttershy a dirty look, to which the other mare squeaked and pulled her fce back behind her mane.

“Am ah really the only one o’ our lil’ circle o’ friends who didn’t know nuthin’ ‘bout a whole culture o’ Ponies havin’ a third gender?”

“I don’t think Rainbow knew before this happened. And … I don’t want to think about what Pinkie knows about that sort of thing.” Fluttershy managed to squeak back in her defence, shuddering slightly as she mentioned ‘Pinkie’. “I tried to explain what it was I sold one day when she snuck into the store, and why I had to keep what I do a secret. I don’t think she fully understood, but there was a … look in her eyes that scared me.”

“Look as in she was angry, or look as in …”

“As in she was very interested in what I had for sale. A few hours later, a pink pony with a trenchcoat and a set of Groucho Marx glasses came in and bought one of everything. Everything. Even the display stands.”

Applejack blanched and shuddered herself. There were just some things one did not want to know the answers to.

“So, uh … how come y’all had, uh, them things at home? Ah mean, them things that ah used on Zecora an’ yah.” Desperately changing the conversation away from whatever deviancy Pinkie had gotten herself involved in, Applejack did her best to ignore the fact that a very warm, very soft mare whom she had very fresh memories of have some extreme physical intimiacy with was leaning up against her, and Applejack still had the aphrodisiac racing through her system. “W-what’s up with that?”

“Well … a mare has needs, you know that.”

“Fluttershy, half the things I saw stickin’ outta Zecora had two ends.”

“Yes, well, Zecora and I … had a conversation about our lack of partners in the winter after that trouble with the townsponies avoiding her and the Poison Joke incident, and we decided to, uhm, help each other through estrus since we didn’t have a stallion around, and it sort of became a regular thing …”

“… Does that mean Big Mac’s gonna be endin’ up with two wives? Ah ain’t ‘gainst it, both y’all are sweet mares an’ hard workers, but ah … boy’s got work to do on the farm, an’ from what lil’ ah can remember o’ that night, both o’ yah are kinda demandin’ in the bedroom. Big Mac not able to buck our trees ‘cause y’both knackered him e’ry night is kinda gonna send Sweet Apple Acres broke!”

“Married …” The butter-coloured Pegasus squeed, dancing daintily in-place, which was an experience for Applejack since Fluttershy hadn’t removed her wing from around Applejack’s shoulders, and the farm-mare got to experience the feeling of Fluttershy’s soft coat rubbing up and against her own. “Oh, oh we’ll have to date for at least a year first, but marrrrrriiiiiied to Big Mac!”

Phew, at last we’re headin’ back into saner topics o’ conversation. Thank you, sweet, merciful Faust, for this reprieve from the weirdness.

“But we’re going to need to, uhm, make sure Big Mac’s okay with my job. I mean, he’s a regular customer, so I know what he likes, but …”

Sweet Apple Cider, no, please …

“… but did you know Big Mac buys a lot of lube? Pear-flavoured lube?”

Faust, I take it all back, you’re a sadist!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight wished, for the hundredth time, that she’d listened to Luna and ordered the Royal Guards to stand watch outside the cabin. She’d felt terrible that the Thestrals and the lone Earth Pony, Stoic Bulwark, would have to stand for the entire trip and instead insisted that they be allowed to come inside in shifts to rest their legs.

Except now Twilight found herself squished into Bulwark’s side, which was delightfully solid and warm, although Twilight herself wasn’t entirely sure if her appreciation for the furry mountain of muscle she was resting against was her own natural inclination or the side-effects of her Sympathy with Luna and their shared estrus messing with her head. The glares from the Thestral Guards towards Bulwark certainly didn’t bode well for the inter-tribal relations within the Royal Guard either.

The reason for said squishing was Luna, who was doing her best to push her rump into Twilight’s, and thus pushing Twilight firmly against the loyal Bulwark, who was in turn doing his best to not make eye-contact with anypony and to restrain the goofy grin on his face with minimal success.

Luna’s reason for said booty-pushing Twilight into some firm muscles happened to be trying to keep Twilight as far as the confines of the cabin would allow for a raging argument between Moonbeam, Rainbow Dash and herself over who the best villain in the Daring Do fandom, and while at the conversation had started out as polite if overly enthusiastic, the whole thing had gone downhill rapidly when Moonbeam had mentioned she preferred the radio-drama version of Ahuizotal’s voice to the novel’s depiction, and then Rainbow and Luna had both spoken up, saying that they believed that a different character sounded more attractive in the radio-drama.

Rainbow had said Dr Caballeron, while Luna had said Gregory Hawkins. At the same time.

An ankward moment later, and all three mares were yelling angryily at each other “Are you crazy!” while flailing at one another with their fore-hooves, and Twilight had found herself in her current predicament.

“So, uhm, Twilight, about the plan …” Rarity called from the other side of the cabin, dodging as best she could in her cast as pillows began to be fly around the cabin as the flailing, squabbling fans of Daring Do reached a new high of irritation with each other. “We will be finding some flying chariots at the depo station, correct? Do we know if they will make it there in time?”

“They’d better, or there’s going to be a whole new slew of hard questions for Princess Celestia. Luna and I both put our royal seals on the order, so if they don’t show up, somepony’s going to have a hell of a time explaining why they didn’t follow up an order by two Princesses of Equestria marked as ‘vitally urgent’.” Twilight explained, grunting as Luna shoved back and smushed Twilight into Bulwark’s shoulder. “Luna, please, the cabin isn’t that big and I’m squashing poor Bulwark here!”

“Oh, I’m fine, you majesty.” The poor, loyal Guard replied, goofily smiling down at her. “Are you sure you’re okay though?”

“A little squished but I’m okay, although I think I smudged your breastplate with some of my makeup.”

Rarity raised an eyebrow, looked pointedly at Luna, who was laughing at the top of her lungs and currently being battered with cushions by Moonbeam and Rainbow, whom being down a foreleg had settled for grabbing a corner of a cushion in her mouth and using it as a bludgeon that way, and then back at Twilight, and then to Bulwark, her eyebrow arching so high Twilight thought it was about to disappear into her mane.

“Uh-huh, I see. Well, far be it from me to speak out of turn, but what if we are left hanging, darling? I can’t exactly see us being able to do anything if we become stranded at this depo, we’ve little means of communication other than sending a thestral as a messenger or trying to flag down a passing train.” The fashionista sighed and fidgeted in her cast, shooting a meaningful look at Moonbeam, who remained oblivious to her ward’s concerns as she started pushing back against Rainbow’s head with her own, the two reduced to inarticulate grunting as Luna struggled to pull a pair of cushions off her horn with her hooves. “We’ll be awfully exposed out there …”

“I asked Spike for a few vials of his fire before we left. We might not be able to receive information, with Spike being left at home to watch over the Crusaders, but at the very least we can send notes to Princess Celestia should we be left hanging.” Twilight explained, shifting awkwardly as tried to find a more comfortable position and failed to do more than grind herself up against Bulwark’s side and Luna’s rear end, neither of which did wonders for keeping her mind in a rational state. “Oh bother, I might just go for a walk and clear my head … Luna! Rainbow Dash! You stop doing that to Moonbeam right now!”

“I thought pillowfights only happened during sleep-overs?” Pinkie said loudly from the far side of the cabin, letting a distressed Kindness hide behind the baker’s pink, fluffy tail, while Honesty and Loyalty floated above their ponified counterpart, hovering protectively while looping back and forth in the air between the fan-fight and Kindness.

“I think we’ve gone well beyond pillow fighting …” Twilight grunted as Luna managed to pry the pillows off her horn, levitated them into the air and then proceeded to bludgeon Moonbeam and Rainbow into the cushioned seats. “Girls, seriously, quit it, this carriage barely has room for six ponies to sit comfortably, and we’ve got eight ponies in here, Rarity’s stuck in her cast an-pwfwaaaagh!”

A stray cushion caught Twilight in the face, and for several moment the squabbling fans continued their rant before a sensation of static electricity crawling over their coats caused every equine in the carriage to stop what they were doing and turn to face Twilight, whose horn-tip, poking out through the cushion, was glowing a deep purple-red while the cushion was beginning to smoulder where it touched her horn.

“RIGHT. No more of that.” The voice, while muffled under the cushion, came out with a steely tone that made Luna, Moonbeam and Rainbow go pale under their coats. “We’re going to sit, we’re going to be quiet, we’re not going to do anything that will make me teleport three of our number into the middle of Canterlot without their coats, yes?”

“But sitting quietly is boring!” Pinkie whined, ignoring the sudden, frantic looks being shot her way and the desperate ‘shush’ gestures.

“So long as I am not being bludgeoned with pillows, having Luna smush me into poor Stoic here with her backside or having to deal with ponies having a raucous argument inside a very small space that I share with them, I don’t really care what you do for the …” Twilight stopped, looked at the clock on the wall and squinted. “ … for the next thirty-four minutes and eighteen seconds till we arrive at the depo.”

“… How do you know we’ll arrive in exactly thirty-four minutes and eighteen seconds?” Luna managed to pipe up after a few second of awkward silence filled the carriage.

“I was panicking about being late for this meeting with the Mother of Stones, so I went down to train station and asked for the average times of travel along the lines going to and from Ponyville from the stationmaster. He was very happy to comply since he takes great pride in his job and wanted to prove he kept accurate records, and I was able to calculate the average travel-time we’d be looking at for our trip, including wind-resistance and the performance of the standard steam locomotive on a regulation-approved rail-network.”

“And you calculated down to the second.” Luna asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I may have been recalculating our destination time since we got onto the train and needed something to distract myself from my nerves with. We’re actually ahead of my original estimate by a good twelve minutes and forty-nine seconds.”

“Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnerd.” Rainbow muttered under her breath.

“Without your coat means no mane, tail or feathers either, Rainbow.” Twilight grated, one eye-lid beginning to twitch erratically.

“NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!” Rainbow said, louder, smirking as Twilight turned to give her an annoyed look, before her smug expression melted into one of alarm as Twilight’s horn began to glow with a spiky aura.

"You know what? I have a better solution than teleporting your coat off." The purple princess said evilly as Rainbow was surrounded in a shifting cloak of purple and red energy. "And best of all, it'll teach you a lesson about mocking nerds with access to vast personal wellsprings of magical energy."

Chapter 75

CHAPTER 75

Celestia sighed one of her ‘public’ sighs, long centuries of practice meaning that to the average viewer, the action was little more than a slightly deeper breath, and tried to ignore the staring. Her two Guards, picked by Dawn Ray for their even more stoic than regulations required attitudes, remained at her side like two very lifelike statues, the Earth Pony seemingly carved of dark granite, the Pegasus of a silvery metal, but every so often they twitched towards their weapons as the locals went about their inane business.

Somehow, against all odds, Twilight Sparkle had arranged for the pickup point to be right smack-dab in the middle of a series of undocumented farms run by a dozen large, interconnected families of Ponies who also happened to be under the sway of the Sisterhood. Who had been patrolling the borders of ‘their land’ for several days now after one of their own had caught sight of Celestia and her Guards flying towards Ponyville a few days ago when Sunset had arrived in her full Succupony glory and had taken the vision of their ‘Goddess’ on the warpath as a sign to mobilize themselves into a militia.

Terrific. Celestia grunted in the privacy of her own mind as she kept a placid and welcoming smile on her face as the assembled farm-ponies looked on at her with worshipful expressions, a rare few bold individuals even risking coming closer to deposit platters of food at her hooves before backing away, eyes fixed on the ground as they did so.

Tellingly, the actual ‘Sister’ had chosen to not show her face, since Celestia’s long history of having to deal with the troublesome cult had taught her that any Sister who came to hold a measure of social power would inevitably be driven by the religious teachings of the cult and the power-schemes of the Sisters themselves to adopt a leadership role within their community, eventually socially strangling any opposition so as to be the sole individual within the group who would be allowed to make decisions in times of crisis or unusual circumstances and would always be the one who spoke first to outsiders or others of importance who came to visit their ‘flock’.

And given that the Sisterhood had built their entire crazy cult around supposed teachings from Celestia herself, that their members were chosen by visions 'received' from the Solar Princess in their childhoods which would in-turn grant them a level of social dominance amongst the poor schmucks they suckered into their Cult in the first place … it would look very odd to the flock for the Sister to not be seen cosying up to the Princess of the Sun. And yet here Celestia stood, alone but for her two Royal Guards, with not a single other Pony coming over to try and engage with her except for a pair of young Colts whom at first whom had simply stared at her starry-eyed for several minutes before remembering their ‘manners’, bowed low and praised her name and then retreated at top speed to gather the rest of their families.

So where is the parasite that fills their minds with the Sisterhood’s poison? Celestia seethed at the puzzle, for it was a distraction she did not need right now, not with Twilight’s trust in her at rock-bottom and the all-important Ascension bearing down upon them all. If Twilight twisted in nature due to her doubts and anger towards Celestia, an eternity spent with her beloved student existing purely to oppose Celestia in all things was not only possible, but horribly plausible.

The only other reason that Celestia felt the Sister could be absent from such a ‘momentous’ occasion was that either the Sister was well aware that a face-to-face meeting with Celestia infront of her own flock would end with the Sister either losing control of her minions and being driven out of her home, or being the target of a lynch-mob of outraged ex-followers.

Celestia’s musings were spared from a further turn to the bitter as a tiny foal, barely old enough to probably know how to speak if Celestia was able to guess, or at least if it was eating normally, although farm-ponies who lived ‘off-grid’ under the Sisterhood’s guidance could either be eating very well, at which point Celestia was about to have an encounter with the biggest toddler she’d ever seen, or was severely under-nourished and was probably stunted.

“Kh-can I have a fuh-feather?” A tiny little voice squeaked out as the little green earth pony stopped a good three body-lengths from Celestia, trembling with either excitement or fear, and Celestia felt her heart melt. Foals had always been a weakness of hers …

“Of course, little one. But first …” Celestia’s horn lit up with her magic, grasping the foal and bringing it over to her, where Celestia lifted a leg up to hold the little foal and wrapped a wing around it, nuzzling it on the crown of it’s head.

For a moment the foal was frozen in place, before with a noise somewhere between a hiccup and a whimper, the little darling collapsed against Celestia and nuzzled into her fur, tiny little hooves kneading at Celestia’s foreleg, and an honest smile found itself in the rare position of Celestia’s muzzle. Looking up from her ‘captive’, Celestia noted that most of the assembled Ponies were torn between looking shocked and envious of the bold little foal now trying to apparently bury itself into Celestia’s wing with happy little squeaks.

At least these poor sods haven’t been brainwashed into the whole angle that I am some vengeful, puritanical Goddess threatening calamity and eternal damnation if they don’t live according to the Sisterhood’s ‘scripture’.

The rare moment of simple joy, holding the foal who quivered with excitement, like a certain pair of fillies once had, two fillies who could not have been more different from one another, Celestia thought sadly, lasted only a short while before her eyes caught sight of a trail of steam and smoke in the distance, while the more bolder ponies shuffled forwards and, at Celestia’s urgings, seated themselves with her and began to share small-talk and news of the region with her, although she noted with some concern they shied away from talking about their actual community.

If I’m judging the distance right, the train won’t be here for at least another twenty minutes. Plenty of time to hopefully get these Ponies to tell me more about the Sisterhood presence in this region. This is awfully close to Ponyville, and I don’t recall there being many settlements this close to the Everfree Forest …

And hopefully, the presence of all these Ponies could delay a potentially-outraged Twilight from exploding in Celestia’s face until they were all safely in Canterlot and Celestia had a chance to explain herself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna tried in vain to not grin at the scene Twilight and her friends made, specifically a blue sloth that clung to the underside of Fluttershy’s neck and ever-so-slowly complained about this being ‘too far’ and ‘not cool’ as Twilight merely rolled her eyes and tried to ignore the ponderous hitch-hiker.

Then again, being turned into a sloth was probably the cruelest form of non-lethal torture the speed-obsessed Pegasus could be made to endure by a friend, the Princess of the Moon surmised, as the party disembarked from the train … and into chaos. Rather than abandoned, the train depo was bustling with Ponies, notably her damned sister, wearing a significant portion of her Regalia no less, sitting in the middle of it all with two Royal Guards at her side, and an entire herd of earth ponies gathered around her, obviously deferential to the ‘Goddess’ in their midst and burdened with offerings of food.

No, stop. This is not the old days, and you know Ponies will always put out a spread when royalty comes to visit, there’s no malice in your sister getting stuffed with treats by the adoration-struck locals. Luna mentally turned and smote the green-eyed monster clinging to the back of her mind square in the soft-parts. And the fact that she’s here at all instead of plotting circles around the Nobles in Canterlot either means something bad has happened … or something really bad has happened.

“The Bearers!” “Hail Princess Luna! Hail Princess Twilight!” and similar cries rose up from the crowd, and now the train-bound crew found themselves being offered dishes and having starry-eyed Ponies gazing at them. It was rather embarrassing even now, especially without any warning, but Luna noticed all of the Bearers, especially Fluttershy and the world’s fasted sloth, seemed to take the sudden burst of attention with open surprise and alarm. Foals and small children were lifted into the air to get a better look at their heroes, and more than once Luna caught sight of a pony making the old gesture of obedience, from the old days of the Unification, which at once both appeased a part of Luna’s ego and chilled her to the core.

The last time I saw Ponies making that symbol was before the Bloody Horn Rebellion …

“Luna, all of you, over here, please.” Celestia’s voice was clear, friendly … and firm, even as her face was set into a pleasant, approachable mask. “We’ve a short time to be had here, and then I will teleport us to Canterlot.”

Luna sighed and trotted over, only to freeze after a few paces when she realized that only she had made the move, and looking back, found herself torn between laughter at the expressions on the Bearers’ faces and guilt that she felt such amusement. They might have seen pictures on the news and in the papers of Celestia wearing her Regalia, but nothing truly prepared a Mortal for seeing an Immortal in their Regalia in the flesh, after all.

Of course, they know Celestia only as the gentle, pacifistic leader of their country. The legacy of our younger days was obscured to avoid stirring up troublesome ‘patriotic’ groups that might want to expand Equestria’s territory without our consent. Luna mused, realizing that seeing her teacher garbed for battle in armor made of condensed divine power was probably rather unsettling for Twilight. I wonder just how scared Twilight would be if she saw Celestia in her full Regalia? Her precious mentor covered from snout to tail in golden armor and spikes? Or me, for that matter? Celestia’s Regalia is heavy plate designed for front-line combat, mine is mostly scale-mail and light plate … what would Twilight’s Regalia look like? If the Powers have any mercy, it won’t be the hideous mess that Cadence’s is…

“Puh-Princess?” Applejack spluttered, looking like she had just been stunned as her eyes trailed up and down her armored Princess.

“Yes, dear Applejack, it is me. We have a few hours until the … visitor to Canterlot is due. I thought it wise to come and pick you up personally rather than risk the usual Canterlot problems delaying you.” Celestia said, smiling pleasantly, although her gaze locked onto Luna, and a faint glimmer of magic whisked around her horn.

Sister, I apologise for the intrusion, but we will have to delay here for a while. These Ponies claim to be of the Sisterhood’s ilk, and while we must get Twilight and the Bearers to Canterlot, I am very concerned to find a Sisterhood community this close to Ponyville, and not mentioned by any of our Agents.

“Come then, we’ve had a long train-ride, and a few minutes of rest with these fine Ponies would do us all some good.” Luna said out loud, offering her best ‘at ease’ smile to the Bearers, as she cast a similar spell back at her sister. This had better be good, Cellie, Twilight is most upset at all the madness that has come her way and you know how she gets about historical inaccuracies. Can we not just … leave this to our Agents?

I want to find out who this Sister is. Either she shows up and we can put a face to our mysterious cult-leader in this region or she doesn’t and we can plant the seed of truth in the minds of these Ponies. Celestia sent back, her expression shifting smoothly to the Bearers, and Twilight, as they hesitantly walked over and were greeted with hugs by the Solar Princess, Twilight’s expression twisting from anger to happiness and then a curious tinge of guilt as her mentor held her close under a wing … and refused to let go. We can’t just allow a cult as insidious as the Sisterhood to set down roots near a town full of as many influential beings as Ponyville without keeping an eye on the proceedings, not with Twilight’s Ascension still in such an early, and fragile, stage. I am going to have to bring Twilight into this conversation in a minute to keep her in the loop, now that she’s on her way to becoming the newest protector of Equis. I need her to understand a … a great many things before her Ascension finishes.

Sister, be aware that Twilight is already under the mental protection of four of the Elements, and has two Rogue Elements trapped inside her mind, with Magic apparently already having tried to fuse itself to her while she was in a uniquely vulernable situation as a Ascending Immortal. Luna warned quickly as Celestia’s horn flickered with magic again. We have no way of knowing if the Sending spell will be blocked by their efforts, or if we might weaken the barriers against Generosity and Magic!

Huh-whu-who?

Believe me, my dear Lu-lu, I would never allow harm to come to Twilight … and I may have been studying Elementals and their abilities for, oh, about a thousand years after the Elements betrayed me and sent you to the moon instead of purging your mind of the Nightmare Spirit’s influence.

A fourth voice entered the fray, competing with the panicked spluttering of Twilight, one familiar to Luna as Honesty made itself known.

Lady Moon, Lady Sun, we swear to you that we, that is the Elements of Honesty, Loyalty, Laughter and Kindness, have never attempted to betray you. You should know well that Magic has always has total control over how our power as Elements, if not Elementals, is expressed, and Generosity’s current … maliciousness is something we’ve never seen our sibling express before.

Be that as it may, did you really have to go dark for over a thousand years? My sister lost to my own foolishness and the machinations of my own court, surrounded by simpering sycophants and parasites as I spent centuries trying to repair the damage and keep pushing the Tribes towards civilisation and away from their specist, tribalist tendencies? And not a single one of you could even so much as offer a mental pat on my shoulder or let me know that I hadn’t obliterated my sister inspite of her Immortality or banished her from this layer of reality altogether? Celestia’s thoughts actually started giving off the impression of heat, to the point Luna noticed herself beginning to sweat, and Twilight looked flushed. Even the Elements appeared affected, Kindness wobbling in place and the two Elements she wore as ornaments wiggling frantically in their settings. Do you have any idea of how alone I felt, the unrelenting horror and self-loathing, the guilt triggering endless flashbacks to what I had to do to my own Tribe plaguing me day and night for centuries? How hard it was to move forward with everyone and everything I trusted torn from my grasp and no way to know exactly what had happened until the Powers themselves finally noticed my distress and decided to take pity on me, granting me a vision of my sister, trapped in stasis on the surface of the moon, and a warning that I had to leave her alone for centuries yet to come, all alone and trapped just outside of my reach with that Nightmare clawing away at her mind?

Princess? Twilight’s voice sounded less panicked now, but Luna could pick up more than a little trace of shock, frustration and guilt. W-what is this, what is happening?

With a deep mental breath, Celestia turned, still talking in the physical world to the ponies around her, and gave Twilight a searching look. My apologies for the abruptness and not asking your permission for this, Twilight, but you need to be brought up to speed, and quickly it seems, on a great many things before the Mother of Stones arrives. Thus, I have brought you into a meeting of the minds, as it were, where Luna and I can brief you, privately, on matters most Mortals are better off not knowing about. Oh, and Honesty invited itself along as well.

Wait, isn’t this a Sending spell? We should just be hearing the words we’re speaking, not direct telepathy! Twilight remained silent in the real world, but her ears had begun to twitch and a by-now familiar tic appeared to be working its magic at the corner of her mouth.

It is a form of magic that only Magi of the Fourth Circle or their leader are taught, Twilight, for obvious reasons. Undetectable telepathic magic that allows one to bring in other minds to the connection at will? I don’t believe I need to go on about how dangerous such magic can be without the proper training and safeguards. Celestia replied, her body giving Twilight a short twitch-like hug with the wing draped over Twilight’s body as their mental conversation continued. Now, as much as I dearly wish to grab you all, teleport us to Canterlot and help you all pace circles into my lovely imported Saddle Arabian rugs, these Ponies are all members of a Sisterhood Cult, and I hope to encounter their leader before we leave. I am very concerned that a Sisterhood cell has sprung up so close to you and none of my Royal Agents knew about it.

Uhm, at the risk of being petty, are you sure they’re worth their wages? No insult to Snowflake, Derpy or the others, but … they’ve kind of sat on their plots while the girls and I have been flung head-first into danger time and time again. I get that they don’t have combat training, but still … Twilight’s thoughts were tinged with equal amounts of bitterness and, again, guilt. She obviously felt terrible about throwing shade on Ponies she had come to like and respect long before learning of their status as Royal Agents.

The Ponyville Agents have done their jobs to the best of their ability, you have no idea how many would-be assassins or kidnappings they have foiled in the past few years related to you and your friends, Twilight. No, my ire is reserved for the Royal Agents of Canterlot who apparently need my hoof up their plots in quite an urgent manner if a blacklisted cult like the Sisterhood has been able to encroach on your territory without any warning.

ASSASSINS? Twilight mentally screamed, while the tic in her face began to rapidly increase in force to the point it almost looked like Twilight was furiously chewing on something.

Sister, how can somepony who has ruled wisely for thousands of years be so bad at breaking the news gently to one who is already on edge? Luna mentally face-hooved as she walked over to Twilight and Celestia and took up position on Twilight’s other side … and hopefully hid the expression of utter horror that had taken up residence on her lover’s face from the assembled ponies around them.

You said Twilight wishes to know the truth … and so she shall. All of it. No more veils of half-truths, no more hidden state secrets, no more obfuscations or omissions.

Princesses, while my siblings and I can shield Twilight’s mind from the Rogue Elements, it would be unwise to make the Pillar any more unstable than she is right now! Even a single gap in our defences due to her emotions interfering with our work could provide Magic with the opening it needs to draw upon Twilight’s own Wellspring, let alone the energies of the Powers that are being drawn into her form as we speak! Honesty’s voice came with a tinge of dire concern, and a familiar soothing hum that Luna recognized as the astral ‘backwash’ of harmonic powers being used. Please, I beg you all, let us table this discussion until after the Mother of Stones can safely remove my treacherous kin from the Pillar, and then you may discuss whatever you wish!

Celestia gave a mental snort of annoyance before ‘speaking’, even as her physical form continued on a pleasant stream of chatter with the Ponies who surrounded them. There will be no secrets between us before you return to Ponyville, Twilight. The very thought that you feel I would maliciously manipulate you hurts more than you know, but I understand that, to your eyes, I must seem quite the villain right now.

Not a villain, just … you always spoke to me about the necessity of honesty and telling the truth no matter what, and then all of this comes out of nowhere, right after you turned me into a Princess? It’s kind of hard to keep the memory of you as everything I ever aspired to be straight when I suddenly start learning you’ve been editing history and suppressing knowledge about the Innate Magics from the Ponies of Equestria!

I never suppressed that knowledge, not of the Innate Magics at least. After the Bloody Horn rebellion, the schools that taught the skills to master Innate Magic began to withdraw from society for fear of their teachings being used to re-start the Age of Wandering by ambitious specists. Celestia explained, her feathered wing patting Twilight’s side comfortingly as her student began to hyperventilate from stress.At their request, I allowed knowledge of the schools’ locations to gradually fade from the public eye, but the schools are still running and keep the knowledge alive. They take in a few hundred students every decade, and many of those end up as my Royal Agents or discreetly slipped into my Royal Guards. Your own father is a student of the Empty Horn-Style School, Twilight.

My father is a WHAT?

The fact he never told you is part of the binding oath all the Innate Masters swear upon entering the school, which binds them by ancient, powerful magics to never reveal the locations of the schools to the uninitiated. He can teach most of what he knows, of course, the original Masters had the foresight to understand cataclysm, rebellion and misfortune could strike at them even with all the safeguards we enabled and they allowed loopholes to allow their students to pass on the teachings to worthy individuals should the need arise.

Princesses, please, we can already feel Magic and Generosity straining against their bonds. Sever the connection now, or we will be forced to do so to keep them contained in the back of the Pillar’s mind! Honesty’s mental ‘voice’ held a tinge of panic now, and with a deep sigh that echoed through all their minds, Celestia withdrew her presence, leaving both Luna and Twilight feeling cold and somehow lonely for a brief moment.

“Princess, ah’ve been meanin’ to ask ‘bout mah little sister … Applebloom an’ the rest o’ the Crusaders kinda got themselves into a pickle …” Luna snapped back to the conversation, noting that the mental communion had lasted perhaps tens of seconds, with the rest of the bearers still bearing the signs of Celestia’s infamous hugging technique and still crowded around their armored liege.

“I am well aware of what happened to the Crusaders, make no mistake, dear Applejack. If Twilight is, by some miracle, unable to reverse the spell that Sweetie Belle cast, I will endeavour to lean on the Neighponese ambassador to allow her access to the Grand Sage Weeaboo.” Celestia leaned down to nuzzle Applejack affectionately on-top of the head, an act that sent the orange farm-mare to grateful spluttering and more than a hint of pink cheeks. “However, unless Fluttershy has brought a very lost friend from the Everfree, I don’t remember any blue sloths being native to this part of the world.”

“Aaaah … ahaha, yes, you see Rainbow was calling me a nerd, so I kind of got her back by polymorphing her into a sloth.” Twilight stammered, eyes wide with nervousness and panic as she nodded to the blue sloth that was now clinging to the underside of Fluttershy’s neck, trying in vain to hide behind the long pink mane of the shy Pegasus. “I should probably change her back soon, right?”

“Oh, a few more minutes won’t hurt. Besides, I would rather her not be zipping around all over the place as I am performing a long-range multi-being teleport, you of all Ponies should know how hard it is for Rainbow Dash to stay still for longer than a minute or two.” Celestia said, pulling back to give a mischievous grin to the sloth, who slowly peeked out from behind Fluttershy’s mane, poked it’s tongue out at the Princess of the Sun, and then returned equally slowly to it’s ineffective hiding-spot.

Further discussion seemed to come to a halt as a cheer rang out from the assembled farm-ponies at the sight of a rickety covered wagon being drawn towards the station by two large, strapping mares whose build and size almost rivalled that of the Earth Pony Royal Guard who was attending Celestia, the cheering quickly resolving into shouting for ‘Sister Comfrey” to hurry.

“Ah, so the Sister is finally revealed?” Luna whispered to Celestia, and Twilight who was stuck in-between the two Princesses, as the wagon came to a slow stop, the two sweat-covered mares who were pulling it quickly and efficiently unshackling themselves and then hurrying to the back of the wagon, one pulling aside the plain white cloth and the other helping the Sister down out of the wagon.

And she needed all the help she could get.

Luna had known old ponies before. She was Immortal, after all, and seeing the fresh face of a young pony gradually morph into a face lined by years, cares and fears was no longer something that troubled her, although she still felt concern for the loss of a friend. Granny Smith was perhaps the oldest Pony Luna had met since her return, but this Sister … so old that whatever colour she might have been once had long since faded to a ethereal silvery-white colour, her mane and tail thin wisps of even paler shades of her coat and her horn was thin, brittle and completely without a protective layer of velvet, the curling spiral of horn a pale, ugly yellow.

But what struck Luna more than anything was the look of pure and unadulterated joy that shone forth from the ancient crone’s face as, half-carried between her two attendants, Sister Comfrey approached the Princesses.

“Oh … oh no.” Luna winced as she heard the heart-break in Celestia’s voice, and the feeling of Twilight’s muzzle pomf-ing into Luna’s chest-fur as the smaller alicorn swivelled her head from princess to princess in an effort to understand why her teacher would sound so distressed.

“Behold, Twilight, the cruellest blow the shysters who lead and sustain this infernal cult can deliver to beings such as us.” Luna dropped her voice to the lowest whisper she could, lowering her head so her muzzle was right by Twilight’s ear.

As Twilight turned her confused gaze to Luna, the Princess of the Moon gave her lover a sad, soft smile.

“The true believer.”

Chapter 76

CHAPTER 76

“Welcome.” Celestia said in a voice, loud, clear and strong, as her horn blazed with power, her armor melting away and reforming into less intimidating accoutrements as the ancient Sister was so carefully, and lovingly, carried into her presence, several Ponies from the nearby settlement moving up to help the Sister forwards and to offer towels and water to the two burly mares who had brought the Sister to the depo.

On trembling, feeble legs, the ancient crone tottered forwards and would have fallen if not for Luna’s swiftness, the Lunar Princess quickly rushing to the Sister’s side and supporting her with wing and magic. “Please be at ease, Sister Comfrey. Do not stand on ceremony, now of all times.”

The ancient Sister’s jaw worked silently for a few moments, her cheeks still wet with tears of joy, as Luna slowly and carefully aided the crone towards Celestia, before Sister Comfrey nodded silently, leaning heavily against Luna’s side as the Sister was carefully conveyed to Celestia’s side and then wrapped in Celestia’s free wing.

“… Not worthy.” The Sister hiccupped softly, shaking under the Princess’s wing. “I am not worthy of such kindness, your Radiances.”

“No, all beings are worthy of kindness, Sister Comfrey.” Celestia said in a voice so gentle that Twilight had to think twice on if she’d actually heard it, but the way the Sisterhood Mare quivered and nodded … “Especially those who shoulder the heavy burden of looking after others, regardless of if it is as a leader of a community or simply tending to the sick and downtrodden. It is far too easy to forget your own limitations when trying to help others.”

“Please, good Sister, rest and take your time. Good Ponies, do we have anything for the Sister to drink?” At Luna’s request, nearly a dozen Ponies rushed off to find a tap or some other source of water, and the ever-solid Stoic Bulwark removed a small hip-flask from under his armor and offered it tentatively to Twilight by hoof.

“It’s just a tonic.” The overly large Earth Pony mumbled when Twilight took and then shook the flask, listened to the sloshing and gave him a pointed look. “Boiled water, some herbs to help with fatigue, that’s all that’s in there, I swear!”

Unscrewing the lid and taking a sniff herself, Luna eyeballed the Guard but nodded and offered the flask to the ancient Sister, who sipped so daintily that Twilight was reminded of the most fragile of the small songbirds that flocked so often around Fluttershy.

“Now, to what do we owe your visit, Sister Comfrey? A mare of your age should not be running around the countryside willy-nilly.” Princess Celestia’s tone was both friendly and calm, two things Twilight herself was most certainly not feeling right at that moment, and whatever reluctance the ancient crone might have possessed at being so close to her deity quickly evaporated, the Sister quick to point out the direction of the unmarked village the Ponies dwelled in and how well said Ponies were doing.

“We’ll have to get some Ponies out to zone the farms, Sister Comfrey, and make sure your community is connected to the basic necessities, such as a sewage system, power stations and the like. We need to make sure the little ones have access to the same level of schooling as foals across the rest of the country, and to make sure you all have access to good doctors for illness and physical well-being.” Celestia rattled off her terms like a happy housewife discussing renovations, and to Twilight’s chagrin, the Sister just ate it all up deliriously, babbling how happy she was, how honored they all were to have the Princesses focusing on them like this.

It pulled at her heart-strings. How had Twilight not noticed how skilled Celestia was at talking Ponies into doing what she wanted and making them think it was their own idea, or the best thing ever? Her tone, her posture, her expressions, all carefully cultivated to make you feel at peace around her, to feel calm, relaxed and amendable to her words.

We spent centuries pulling your Tribes back from the brink of mutual genocide. Luna had said. Surely that made sense, one caught more flies with honey than vinegar after all, but the thought that Celestia could just simply slip behind a mask that felt so heart-breakingly familiar to manipulate Ponies, even if it was for their own good in the long-term, caused Twilight pain that almost felt physical in its intensity.

And the Sisterhood, a cult that Celestia had admitted to Twilight, after the inevitable question from a starry-eyed foal to her immortal mentor and idol had finally been asked, was one of the more loathsome groups to ever skulk at the borders of Celestia’s authority. That Celestia, despite her Immortality, despite her power, despite her wisdom and grace and generosity, was no God and abhorred being worshipped as such. Twilight could understand, albeit reluctantly, that Celestia was playing a game to test the waters and see if this Sister Comfrey was a petty tyrant using religious beliefs to rule over this un-marked village, or if she was truly just a pious mare doing her best to live up to the ideals that the shysters who had made and ran the Sisterhood of Celestia falsely touted to gather power to themselves under the cover of religious freedom, but the ease at which her mentor manipulated those same lies for her own benefit did little to ease Twilight’s concern about the ‘truth’ that would be revealed to her.

It was with an awkward and sickening sense of awe that the Ascending Alicorn saw with clear eyes how easily Celestia just sat there in the middle of all the adoration and worship and let it slide right off of her like water off a duck’s back. Luna too, for that matter, seemed so much more confident and collected compared to her interactions during the Nightmare Night debacle, although where Celestia seemed to be more focused on Sister Comfrey and chatting the information right out of the pleasant old mare, Luna focused on the other Ponies who looked to the Sister for guidance, speaking to as many of them as she could, inquiring about their crops, their children, did they have any ailments, any nightmares that seemed odd or unusual, while all Twilight herself did was …

Just sit here, round-eyed and terrified of stepping out of line and screwing things up for the others. The purple Alicorn thought bitterly to herself. Not that her friends did much different, although at least Applejack, Pinkie and Rarity were making an attempt, Applejck discussing crops with a pair of farmers, while Pinkie and Rarity tag-teamed the foals and younger ponies, with Pinkie working her usual magic while Rarity used her magic to levitate the smaller foals or to ‘pretty up’ the fillies before they tottered over to Luna or Celestia to ask for a blessing.

Fluttershy, naturally enough, cowered from any form of attention, and Rainbow Dash, still being sloth-ified, was stuck clinging to the underside of Fluttershy’s neck and hiding her slowness from the world behind the safety of the other pegasus’s pink, flowing mane. The Elements at least stayed close to Twilight, Kindness still in a form that seemed to draw equal inspiration from both Fluttershy’s form and that of Fleur de Lis, while the Elements that remained in gemstone form had hidden themselves in Twilight’s mane, growing small tendrils to anchor themselves in the curl of Twilight’s mane and thus out of casual sight.

To be fair, Twilight, it’s better to do that exactly right now. There’s a lot of tension between yourself and Celestia, and you’re not skilled enough in social interactions to hide that fact like Celestia can. These ponies would be able to tell that something is off between you and the other Princesses, and that could be dangerous if this part of the Sisterhood is able to communicate quickly with the rest of the Cult. Honesty’s voice whispered in Twilight’s mind. Their entire system is built upon twisting the Hopebringer’s words to suit their own agenda, and there’s Sisterhood followers all across the world. The last thing you need is to have the Cult’s leaders trying to use your current issues with the Hopebringer to cultivate some sort of global antagonism towards you.

That does not do much to calm my nerves, you realize that, right? Twilight shot back, grimacing as her mind raced and conjured images of a Sisterhood-inspired revolution against her, against friendship, and the consequences that could have on the unstable arena of global politics.

Honesty is just being, well, honest, Pillar. I know this is aggravating, but shortly you’ll speak with our Mother, she’ll pry these two rebellious chunks of slate out of your mind and then you can sit down and have a good old fashioned row with Celestia. Loyalty’s voice, oddly british-sounding, filled her mind, along with a muted thump noise and a grunt of pain from Honesty. I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Celestia said herself you’re going to hear everything before you return home, and given that that’s thousands of years worth of information, I believe she’s going to use a rather drastic measure to help you and your friends experience her side of the story.

Twilight found it harder to keep the scowl from her face as she tried to think of how Celestia could perform such a feat without simply giving Twilight an abridged version of history, and probably an edited one at that, as a gaggle of young colts and fillies, loosely supervised by a slightly older filly close to the Crusader’s age who kept looking at Twilight with large, awed eyes, closed in on her.

“O-oh, hello, how can I …” Twilight began, nervously smiling at all those innocent faces looking at her, before one of the youngest squeaked excitedly and barrelled into her, gripping onto Twilight’s forelimb and snuggling hard, and Twilight felt her anxiety and anger melt somewhat under the assault of unbridled affection. “Oh! Well hello there! It’s nice to meet you too!”

And apparently her change in mood was all the approval the other foals needed to charge her in turn, leaving Twilight laughing as she was smothered in small bodies, all hanging off her or cuddling into her, the rare few pegasi amongst the foals trying their best to get under her wings and necessitating Twilight getting down onto her belly so the desperate little dears could gain access, which also unfortunately meant the other foals could climb onto Twilight’s back and neck.

“Oooooh! Princess, I’m so sorry! Kids, get off the Princess, that’s so rude!” The older filly, bearing a washed-out green green coat with a two-toned grey mane and a stubby little horn, danced on the spot, her field spluttering as she awkwardly tried to levitate foals off of Twilight without much success, since as soon as one foal was removed, two more would rush in to attempt to smother Twilight, and the young caretaker’s panic played merry-hell with her ability to control her telekinetic field.

“I don’t mind, really. It’s not often I get to see foals, or play with them.” The newest Princess tried to assure the young Unicorn with mixed success, as a particularly rambunctious little filly grabbed a mouthful of Twilight’s mane and tried to tug on it to attract attention to herself, but only succeeded in pulling painfully on Twilight’s scalp. “Ow! Although I will admit the little ones are maybe a tiny bit overstimulated?”

“Ah don’t think it can be helped, Sugarcube. Ain’t many folks that get to meet the Princesses, all three of ‘em at once even, so the young ‘uns probably ain’t gonna settle down anytime soon.” Applejack pointed out, a slight smile on her face as she trotted over from where she’d been talking to some of the ‘local’ farmers. “That said, how’re y’all dealin’? Was worried ‘bout what was gonna happen when y’all got together, considerin’ …”

“It’s … not the best, Applejack, but if I have waited all this time without actually knowing what was going, I can wait a few more hours for Celestia to, well, pull back the veil. First, we deal with the Mother of Stones and help Rarity. Then, we get her to deal with the rebellious little stones. Then … we get our answers.”

“And get them we will. First, however, Celestia needs to speak to Sister Comfrey to fully understand why the Sisterhood built a village so close to Ponyville rather than just moving in directly.” Applejack, Twilight and the young unicorn caretaker all jumped slighty as Luna rejoined them, looking quite pleased with herself despite what appeared to be several bits of hay sticking out of her starry mane and tail. “That said, skooch over, Auntie Luna wants a cuddle with all these adorable little darlings.”

Twilight blinked slightly and did as asked, finding Luna nestling down on one side and Applejack on the other, the foals, colts and fillies squealing delightedly and clambering all over their two new ‘guests’ while their poor caregiver looked on the verge of fainting. A quick glance told the newest Princess that the reason for the sudden deluge of adorableness plaguing her had a lot to do with Rarity being monopolized by the mares of the Sisterhood Village who were asking for help with being tidied up before meeting Celestia in person, while Pinkie had … vanished.

“Uhm, at the risk of being rude, did anypony see where Pinkie ended up?” Twilight asked, wincing as a bold little Earth Pony filly climbed up her neck and began tapping a tiny hoof against the base of Twilight’s horn.

“… Nnnnope.” Applejack replied, a tinge of concern in her voice.

“I confess, I was not paying attention.” Luna replied a heartbeat later, her smile turning somewhat sickly as the three mares shared a concerned look.

“Well, it’s a small station, she can’t have gotten far … let’s just, uhm, just give her five minutes before we start panicking, okay?” The purple princess tried to sound confident, but the thought of Pinkie, rarely in-tune with what was going on during the more serious moments of their adventures, wandering around with the Sisterhood Cultists all around them and her Element no-longer looking over her shoulder filled Twilight’s belly with butterflies and her head with visions of well-meaning, confetti-covered doom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dappled Light groaned, rolling over and over on his bed with a pillow wrapped around his muzzle to contain his screams of dismay, and wished once again for Faust to provide that much-desired end to his suffering.

Scout, on the other hoof, just watched him with naked curiosity, one be-holed leg reaching for him awkwardly every time he rolled closer, then falling back to the floor limply when he rolled away.

My Queen, what should I do? Guard Dappled is very distressed at the knowledge of his Queen’s disapproval of his fantasies, and I am not well-versed in how to comfort those not within the Hive-Mind.

Only silence greeted Scout for several moments before, in a strangely subdued tone, the Queen asked What … fantasies were those? The taste of concern and dismay in her Queen’s thoughts did little to ease Scout’s own worries.

Quickly sifting through the memories of the short, confusing meeting with the High Guard Prime of the Ponies and the Healer-Pony who dealt specifically with the Ponies’ Queen-Caste, Scout did her best to assemble the picture for her own Queen. Something involving both of the current Queen-Castes in a ritual called ‘sis-cest’, I believe. High Guard Prime Dawn Ray seemed to approve, albeit in a manner that suggested a subversion of his Queen’s authority, while the Healer Prime seemed to be outraged. Whatever this ritual involves, apparently even mentioning it drove Queen Celestia into a rage towards both Guard Dappled and High Guard Prime Dawn Ray.

Scout had expected orders to further investigate, or to explore the division within the leadership of Hive Celestia.

She had not expected the Hive-Mind to rock with the hysterical laughter of her own Queen, along with half-seen images of the two Queens of Hive Celestia attempting to eat each other’s heads … or at least that’s what she could only assume the more vivid images were depicting.

Aaaahahahaha! No wonder our poor little Dappled is so distraught! A bold fetish, if unfortunately uncovered at precisely the wrong moment! Mirth, dark and cutting, flowed through the Hive-Mind, no doubt forcing smirks onto the faces of the many Changelings caught unprepared for such a powerful flow of emotion from their Queen before she pulled the emotion back lest it overflow further. Simply grab Dappled when he next rolls towards you and hold him gently, my little Scout. Stroke his mane a few times. He is feeling distressed and ashamed, so giving him the impression that you care will do wonders for calming him and furthering your mission.

Scout bit her bottom lip at that. It wasn’t that she was opposed to sharing physical contact with Guard Dappled, but he seemed … far too distressed for such things. Still, the Queen knew far more than she about a great many things, including Ponies, and as a Drone, it was Scout’s duty to obey. So when he rolled closer to her, this time Scout made certain to hold him in place, trying her best to smile like the Ponies did as a large, teary eye blinked up at her before she awkwardly pulled herself onto the bed with Dappled, the pillow between them, and awkwardly began stroking his mane with a holed leg.

“I do not hate you.” Scout informed the distressed stallion, trying to cuddle up against him with mixed results as her hoof continued to stroke his mane. “I do not like seeing you so upset. Is this not the way Ponies console one another?”

“Mmmpngh.” Dappled mumbled around his pillow, eyes wide, then nodded slightly, and Scout found herself relaxing somewhat.

I am doing this correctly then.

If you were trying to give off an awkwardly maternal impression rather than a sexual one. Hmmph. Still, not bad for your first effort, Scout. Try asking him to speak to you, try to establish an emotional rapport. Her Queen coached from the mental side-lines, and Scout found herself … wavering. Some part of her felt incredible embarrassment, not at holding Dappled so, but at being watched.

Her Queen made the mental equivalent of a ‘get on with it’ gesture, and Scout was suddenly aware of the taste of popcorn on someling’s tongue. Several somelings at that.

“It is alright. I am sure your Queen will forgive you. You have done so much work for her, served loyally, even helped bring peace between our Hives. Surely that must count for something?” Scout continued, trying to bring herself closer to Dappled, who, either in an effort to speak to her or in accordance with the strange code of conduct Ponies seemed to follow between their genders, which seemed to be a conflicting, confusing mess of come hither mixed with back off, shoved the pillow down between their bodies but in doing so exposed his neck, chest and face to her.

“I … don’t think this is something she’ll forgive. Or Princess Luna, for that matter.” Scout said in a thick voice, sniffling softly. “She’s personally offended, I have offended a Goddess and she’ll … she’s going to …!”

Scout winced as Dappled surged forwards and hugged her, sniffling miserably into her mane, his horn pressed against the junction of her head and neck, and Scout returned the embrace as best she could, feeling a twinge of pain deep in her chest at how the Guard trembled with his misery and fear.

“High Guard Prime Dawn Ray said he would intercede, did he not? Yes, you have disappointed your Queen, but surely you can prove yourself again?”

“I … guess? But this isn’t the sort of thing you just forget about! Even if I wanted a higher rank, to be a Royal Guard means a buttload more training, constantly being watched all the time and the worst thing?” Dappled whimpered, and Scout could taste the fear radiating off him, bitter and rank. “I’ve been told that I’ll either die in training or I will end up the first of the Twilight Guard. Protecting Twilight bloody Sparkle, the most dangerous Pony in all of Equestria, if not the world! She’s a Faust-damned disaster-magnet and the Princess wants me to be her meat-shield! I’ve been assigned to baby-sit the greatest menace Equestria has ever created as a reward!”

Hmmm, I think I grow more and more fond of this Dappled Light. Chrysalis murmured through the Hive-Mind, and Scout felt more of her Queen’s dark amusement threatening to flood through the surviving Changelings. He’s considerable more aware than the rest of the sheep Princess Celestia is so fond of, at least in this regard.

The Hive-Mind thrummed with questions about Sheep and why an Equine Hive would have Sheep Drones, and then the exasperation of the Queen as she tried to explain it was a ‘figure of speech’ involving the infamous reputation of Sheep to follow the strongest or loudest figure around, even if it would lead them to disaster.

Scout tried to filter it all out to simply enjoy the warmth of Dappled’s warm, furry chest against her own chitin, the way his breathing was slowly returning to normal as her stroking of his mane continued in a more confident manner, the way his hooves held her in turn now, rather than clutching desperately.

“You will be fine, Dappled. The Hive stands with you … I stand with you.” Scout whispered into Dappled’s ear, feeling a spark of enjoyment as she watched the sensitive, fluffy ear flick and twitch as her warm breath tickled the nerve-rich skin. “While High Guard Prime Dawn Ray trains you to become a ‘Royal’ Guard, I will help you with your talent, as much as I can.”

“The whu?” Dappled grunted in surprise, but did not pull away from Scout’s embrace.

Likewise, Scout, what the f~ Chrysalis began, a note of scolding in her voice, before something happened.

Scout shut the link.

She wasn’t sure why, or even how, she could do such a thing to her Queen. She’d never even dreamed of cutting off her Queen for any reason, either in the Hive-Mind or verbally, but something felt right about this one, bizarre act of defiance.

And then the link opened right back up and there was the Queen’s mind-glow looming over her … laughing hysterically.

Oh, right, love-drunk. And before anyling gets uppity, I forgive Scout, and if those of you who still need a reason to think well of your sister after she has received my personal clemency, go through the Hive-Mind’s records of novice infiltrators who attempt physical courtship as a means of feeding.

Feeling like she was being torn between an overwhelming sense of fear and that same, strange curiously suicidal boldness, Scout remained where she was as Dappled began to slow his breathing, his body growing more relaxed and his hold on her looser, sure signs that despite his panic, the Stallion was beginning to go to sleep in her hooves.

As the Queen’s mind-glow continued to loom over her, now protectively if Scout’s curiously divided mind has grasped, the Changeling was aware of the odd sensation of nearly the entire Hive diving into the Hive-Mind’s deepest recesses to uncover the relevant information … and many went flying back to their own forms, either squealing in shock or giving mental ‘voice’ to outrage, amusement or horror, while the few surviving Changelings from before the Invasion of Canterlot, who had remained ‘on duty’ while the younger generation pursued the reason for Scout’s small rebellion mentally huffed, chuckled or rolled their eyes at the shenanigans of their younger siblings. Thankfully, the Queen’s strange new brood were too young and ‘individual’ to be affected by the scattering of old memories and images, but Scout was able to pick up images of Infiltrators engaged in vigorous, potentially violently so, coitus with a variety of beings, often shutting the Hive-Mind out entirely in the process and losing themselves to weeks or months of total sublimination within their cover identities and the overwhelmingly positive emotions of their lovers.

I … my Queen, I will cut myself off from the Hive-Mind right now and …

Don’t even try, or I am going to have a devil of a time explaining to Queen Celestia why half my Hive is pursuing you through her city with cocoons in-hoof to capture you with. Chrysalis’s voice was filled with equal parts exasperation, amusement and a strangely personal sense of grief. I assume you merely studied the physical methods of courtship and procreation, and never bothered with the training that my Infiltrators undergo to handle directly receiving such a raw and potent infusion of Love directly to their own bodies, especially during a situation where they would be diverting their attention between maintaining their form, pleasing their lover and enjoying themselves immensely?

Scout felt her cheeks turn a bright shade of green and heat up considerably.

Oh-ho-hoh! So you did do some studying on that last part then?

Scout mentally squeaked and tried to hide, only for Chrysalis’s mind-glow to chase her down and glomp her, smothering her mind in affection.

And I’ll just bet you started to feed on Dappled Light’s affection and trust for you, with your little ovipositor all warmed up after all that studying … and you got love-drunk. It happens to the best of us, my little one, but in future, please make sure you seal off your link to the Hive-Mind properly. Drone or not, I should not be able to reopen the Link so easily. The Queen sent to her images of a smaller, younger version of Scout having her mane ruffled by the Queen’s own hoof and more impressions of affection and exasperation. Again, I don’t want the Hive-Mind distracted by your being impressed by this awkward young Stallion finding your g-spot over and over again. We already walk on treacherous ground as it is, having dozens of Changelings shouting “Yes! Yes! YES!” out of nowhere or attempting to copulate with the nearest sentient because you didn’t seal off your link properly could be disastrous.

I did not mean to fail, my Queen, I simply … the Hive-Mind’s memories did not really help me.

Child, I and the Infiltrators I spawned have seduced, fucked and pillow-talked our way across Equestria for nearly sixty years. How in My Name did those memories not help you?

Bec … because most of those memories involved merely feeding and moving on within a few days or weeks. A few Infiltrators were able to maintain their relationships for months or years before you forced them to abandon their Hosts when the Hive needed to move on to avoid detection. Scout explained, trembling as the idea of openly telling the Queen about her worries forced itself into her innermost mind and demanded to be expressed. I do not want to be separated from Dappled, I feel drawn to him. He is sweet, gentle and courageous in a small, simple way. And the Hive now exists in the open. The Hive’s memories are useful, but I do not wish to hide what I am from Dappled. I wish to be a Changeling … at his side.

Scout sagged as the Queen’s mind-glow shuddered and then leaned down on her, and she felt a moment of panic that the Queen was actively crushing her mind in punishment for overstepping the bounds of a Drone’s rights before the contact pushed impressions into Scout’s mind.

The Queen, dressed in white silks and platinum jewellery, standing next to Former Guard High Prime Shining Armor, both of them before Queen Celestia during the ceremony that had masked the Changelings’ invasion of Canterlot.

The Queen and Queens Celestia, Luna and Cadence sitting around a table, sharing drinks and loudly complaining about the follies of their Hives.

The Queen and Shining Armor, again, locked together in passion in a spacious, soft bed.

The Queen walking down the streets of Canterlot in her own chitin, talking pleasantly with the Junior Queen Twilight and the chaotic Drones the Junior Queen surrounded herself with, laden down with bags of purchased goods.

Shining Armor, holding the Queen’s latest, aberrant brood up and laughing as he nuzzled the younglings, before reaching a hoof out to his Queen, Chrysalis, with eyes shining with adoration and love.

And all of it overlaid with the impression of crippling loss and grief, so strongly that Scout felt tears began to leak from her own eyes.

It is a good dream. One I hope with all my heart that you may achieve. Chrysalis whispered to Scout through the Hive-Mind after what felt like an eternity, the young Changeling trying desperately to separate herself from the sensations and impressions the momentary contact between their mind-glows had given to her.

My Queen? Scout sent, lost and afraid at the sheer power of the impressions she had received, and more than a little concerned at how the Queen had turned from amused, if irritated, to suddenly silent and refusing to share even a hint of her emotions after her momentary lapse with Scout.

Hold onto him, my child. If it is your dream to love this Stallion and be loved in return, I, of all Changelings, have no right to tell you not to pursue this folly. Chrysalis’s mind-glow whispered to her, before retreating deep into the depths of the Hive-Mind, shutting the Hive entirely out of contact with her and leaving Scout feeling suddenly so very alone as the rest of the Changelings chattered and whispered to each other over their Queen’s strange behaviour.

As Dappled slowly fell asleep in her hooves, it occurred to Scout that none of the other Changelings had seen the Queen’s inner mind at that moment, only herself.

And so Scout gathered her courage and tried to relax herself to sleep along with Dappled, filled with the sudden knowledge that she was not the only Changeling that desperately hoped that ponykind could love and forgive their kind for their own, personal reasons.

She would spend a long time awake, guiltily aware that the very thing she enjoyed now was the feeling her Queen would give anything to feel from the Stallion who had married another, and loathed Chrysalis with all of his being.

Chapter 77 (Contains trace amounts of Dragon Nuts - Clop)

CHAPTER 77

Sunset sighed and paced her room again. Being back in her personal quarters gave her a confusing maelstrom of emotions to process, mostly a blend of guilt, relief and self-loathing with hints of pride and satisfaction.

Despite everything, or perhaps in defiance of everything, that had happened between them, Celestia had kept the room immaculate and everything had remained exactly as Sunset had left it. Her clothes were far too small to fit, but then Sunset would have had to have had them replaced anyways with both her slow maturation in the other world making her too large for them, and of course the challenges her new physical form was forcing her to deal with.

I feel … lighter. Brighter, even, if that’s even an accurate term. The firey-maned Unicorn sighed and looked at her reflection in the mirror once again. Her eyes looked friendlier, her face less drawn and tense, her hooves were not made of gold anymore and yet the bat-like wings remained, albeit now covered in the same golden fur as the rest of her body rather than the pitch-black felt-like fur they once had, as had the lion-like tail, which still made her hips sway more than she was comfortable. And she wasn’t quite sure how to stop it twitching, wagging or curling around her whenever her emotions became too strong, which was troubling in its own right since it could clearly broadcast her moods to even the densest observer. Celestia promised the infestation of … whatever that thing was is gone, but that I need to make sure I remain within the wards, and that the less-magical alterations to my body are permanent. Confinement to my old quarters serves both as probation for my crimes and to protect me from another attempt to subvert me until the wounds on my spirit are healed and the holy warding array Celestia placed on my Cutie Mark is fully enmeshed with my magical aura.

Not that she objected to being punished for her many sins and crimes … or the lavishing of attention from Celestia before the affairs of state once again interfered. She’d even admitted as much to Celestia during a quiet moment after the last of the liquid gold had been tattooed into her skin, and nearly had her ribs broken when Celestia hugged her tightly.

Well that wasn’t entirely true, Sunset did mind the limitedness of her new confines, especially since Twilight was still out there and didn’t quite understand that Sunset was her … lover? Destined one? She still hungered for Twilight’s presence with an ache that nothing else in Sunset’s life had ever come close to, but the overwhelming urge to possess Twilight physically had been removed along with the fiendish infestation.

Not that Sunset would object to having Twilight under her hooves right now, but first she had to prove her intentions were pure before fully exploring the wonders of a marefriend as adorkable and cute as Twilight.

And then there was the whole ‘entire world about to be consumed by the Succuponies’ angle. Whatever her heart might feel about Twilight right now, the thought of the human-dopplegangers of the Bearers of Harmony being caught up in some fiendish plot and not being there to help them ate at her like a cancer.

Celestia had said something about the other Immortals doing a quick patch-job on Tartarus to prevent the event, but that still didn’t do anything about the three strange girls with their giant red gem pendants that had pushed Sunset through the portal to Equestria weeks in advance of the portal’s normal cycle. Even a Princess like Celestia would have struggled to force the connection open, and all those three had had to do was kick Sunset in the guts and then push her into the base of the statue to make it happen.

Bleak Mountain, that ever-sour mule of a Stallion who had been the bane of Sunset’s life as one of Celestia’s personal students, constantly harassing Sunset over what, even as a young filly, the sun-coloured Unicorn knew was a petty jealousy of learning directly from the Princess, had grudgingly allowed Sunset access to any materials related to these ‘Sirens’ and the two other Magi who worked with him had, after a few false starts, happily given Sunset whatever she asked for as she attempted to ferret out the truth of the Hippocampi sorceresses from the dross of fantasy and historical whimsy, with one of the Magi, an older mare called Bunny Steps amusingly enough, actively debating with Sunset when conflicting stories came together in the research.

Unfiltered access to Celestia’s private historical records of every being that had passed through the Mirror Portal also gave Sunset a disturbing impression that any being that passed through the dimension between realities might also gain this ageless property, or be altered in some other way if the historical texts. That theory, combined with what she knew of the Succuponies’ plans for Earth and its dominant species, was enough to give Sunset nightmares about what would happen if the hairless, war-like ape-people of ‘Earth’ ever did gain access to magic and Equestria itself on a broader scale than six teenage females.

It also explained how the Sirens still existed despite being sealed away well over a thousand years ago. The Sirens had been merely mortal, if extraordinarily powerful, sorceresses in Equestria, and seaponies like themselves rarely lived past eighty or ninety years of age, especially the fish-types. The octopus and crab-types could live for longer, but their magic was internalized more often than not and thus their bodies could endure longer.

Even with their immense magical power and the stolen vitality of several nations that the three sisters had accumulated and used on themselves, living for thousands of years without turning themselves into Liches or some form of Undead was simply impossible. Age spells simply had an upper limit, and the longer one tried to live past their natural life-span, the more power they would have to burn to sustain the effect, and even taking into consideration all of their victims, the rate of diminishing returns involved with all forms of age spells would have meant the Sirens should have died out hundreds of years before Sunset ever stepped through the Portal. The only way the Hippocampi could have survived, especially with the time-dilation effect of the Portal and the two realities it bridged, was to have been altered by their brief trip through the Portal into ageless beings!

If that theory held true, that could mean any being who was exposed to the energies of the dimension between realities could become effectively untouched by the ravages of aging. Bleak Mountain’s eyes had narrowed at this, and then he’d snorted and left to ‘gather more research materials’ when Sunset had found several reports of Starswirl the Bearded and his allies crossing into the mirror to help seal away great evils that, for one reason or another, were incompatible with the prison-plane of Tartarus.

What that meant for a being like Twilight, who as an Alicorn was likely already immortal, was anypony’s guess. It could also mean that Sunset herself was now Ageless … which, while not being a Princess, would at least mean her attempts to woo Twilight could continue indefinitely.

A small victory, perhaps, but I shudder to think what it could mean if I wasn’t changed into an Ageless being, but something other. Sunset shivered as she remembered the voice from before, the one that had lurked in the depths of her mind and given her the task of restoring her ‘inner harmony’ before Sunset could even hope to stand by Twilight’s side for this prophesied moment the voice had spoken of.

And the fact it had called Celestia it’s daughter opened up a whole host of implications that rocked Sunset to her core.

‘Faust’, if that was what the Voice really was, called me the ‘Shimmering Light’, and said I had to light the way in our world’s darkest hour. I also have to defend against something called the Discordant Song and help some ‘Lonely Voice’ find it’s way back to Harmony. The sun-coloured Unicorn scowled and stopped pacing her room to sit herself down at her writing table. Hissing in pain as she banged a hoof against a box of scrolls in the process, the partially-transformed Unicorn took a closer look at her hoof, noticing the fractures, the chips and the beginnings of a nasty-looking crack … but no signs of the cloven golden hooves from before. I mean, Celestia is a God, right? So there’s tiers of godhood? But she always said she was merely immortal, not divine, yet I know when I tried to force my way through that other Princess’s barrier, I was burned by divine energies. And she moves the freaking sun and moon around, for Faust’s sake!

Is Celestia some sort of angel? Are all Alicorns just holy spirits come down to our level to guide and protect us? But I’ve seen Celestia bleed, and binge on cakes when she was feeling depressed, and get flustered. So she can’t be some sort of divine being, yet I’ve seen, and felt, her magic before, and knowing what I do now, it’s certainly not arcane magic and it’s definitely the opposite of the fiendish power I once held.

And the voice said that Twilight was something called the ‘Pillar’. Now, I know pillars are meant to function as a support-structure, often to keep roofs up and walls in place… Sunset frowned and picked up a pen with her magic, quickly scratching down her thoughts on a piece of paper. So if Twilight is meant to hold something up, then the ‘Lover’ that Faust spoke of has to be Cadence. Ugh. There’s a reunion I am not looking forwards to. Which means that the Dreamer and the Hope-Bringer have to be this new Princess of the Night and Princess Mom-lestia, in that order. I don’t know enough about the blue Alicorn, but I sure as hell know that Celestia has always pushed ridiculously hard to spread peace and harmony across Equiss, to spread the ‘hope’ of a better future for all races, creeds and nations.

A series quick, scratchy sketch started to appear on the page as Sunset turned her theories over and over in her mind, poking at the holes in her guess-work to try and gauge how close she was to the truth as she drew the faces of the likely beings involved and a crude connective web between them. Discordant usually meant Discord had been meddling with mortals or something else in the older stories, but Celestia said he’d reformed, of all things, and nothing in the ancient tales or from Celestia’s stories ever said anything about Discord singing to do anything other than taunt others or amuse himself, so it could be something or someone that is connected to him in some form or fashion, or some sort of entity that was turned discordant … and then there’s the ‘Lonely Voice’ that needs to be guided back to Harmony.

So, something that sings that needs to be returned to either balance or actual Harmony … the Sirens? But Faust said the ‘Lonely Voice’, meaning a singular entity, and those three seemed close as poisonous peas in a pod. Sunset’s quill scratched at the page, drawing three crude hippocampi before drawing a line through each of them in turn. I’ll have to pick Celestia’s brain when I see her next, maybe there’s some other singing sorceress or wizard that fell afoul of Discord and needs to be restored … but Discord’s reign was over a thousand years ago, and once again we run into the problem of most beings unable to survive for over a thousand years without either divine intervention or some other sort of multi-dimensional alteration to their biology.

Sunset was so caught up in her musing that she jumped in shock as a heavy hoof slammed down on the small writing desk, whipping her head around to give a startled look at the offending party.

Bleak Mountain glared down at her, while behind her the two Fourth Circle Magi dithered back and forth on their hooves, a pony-sized load of scrolls, tomes and books levitated between them and looks of alarm on their faces.

“Whu-huh? S-sorry, I was lost in …” Sunset began, before the scowling Fifth Circle Magi swept his hoof across the table, scattering the loose pieces of paper and scrolls in the process and making Sunset jump back from her seat, tripping and falling onto her back, yelping as her bat-like wings slammed against the floor.

“Make no mistake, abomination, the Princess’s misguided affection for the Pony you used to be is the only reason you still exist in this world. When the leader of Equestria’s Magi speaks to you, you will answer, and answer immediately, am I clear?”

Startled and stunned from the pain of her wings being squashed under her, Sunset could only gape as the old Unicorn scowled at her, papers still fluttering through the air, before stalking from the room. The other two Magi waited, frozen, until Bleak Mountain left, slamming the door behind him, before rushing to Sunset’s side. Bunny Steps immediately began fussing over Sunset’s physical ailments, while the younger Stallion, Rolling Moss, bathed her in a battery of detection and healing spells, his narrow, gaunt face drawn into a tense frown.

In between the stammering and the outrage, Sunset was helped back onto her hooves and the two Fourth Circle Magi helped Sunset try to re-arrange her notes amidst the mess left by Bleak Mountain’s assault, but between the mass of research material they had brought with them, and the loss of cohesion from her own shock, Sunset couldn’t find her quickly scribbled notes on the ‘prophecy’ and was too afraid that the remaining Magi, torn between obeying their notoriously strict and demanding master, who had already shown great hostility and contempt to Sunset and obeying their Princess’s commands towards Sunset, might reject her if she tried to tell them about another voice in her head to speak of it.

Come home soon, Celestia. This new cell might be worse than the last one!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the other side of the door, Bleak Mountain sighed and reinforced the locking spell on the door, hearing Bunny Step’s maternal fussing and the pained complaining of the Succuponi.

The Goddess had failed to recognize his greatness and relegated him to being little more than her errand boy. His subordinates were too busy jockeying for his position or pursuing fruitless lines of research. The Bearers were frustratingly kept just out of reach for him to use. And now the Shining Sun had all but slapped him in the face with the knowledge she was not only aware of his indiscretions with Tartarus, but that the strides he had made over the past three decades towards attaining his rightful place in the Celestial Bureaucracy had been completely wiped away in a single day by the other, lesser members of the divine hierarchy that controlled and shaped the world.

His oaths bound him, both physically and mentally. Strain too far and not only would he be afflicted with terrible agony and the loss of his magic, but the Shining Sun would know immediately of his overstepping his bounds, and spending a few centuries as a pigeon-roost in her gardens would be one of her more merciful punishments. It had taken decades to learn the exact boundaries of his role, to know where he had to abide and where he could strain the terms and wording of the Blood-Oath, and to apply subtle sorcery to tease those weaker boundaries apart to allow himself more freedoms … and even then, he’d barely made a dent, and the Shining Sun probably was aware of that too!

And yet, his long service, however bitterly unrewarded, had afforded Bleak Mountain access to knowledge not even the personal libraries of the Empress's bloodline ancestors back in Neighpone could boast, tomes, scrolls, tablets and other, older records preserved by the divine power of the Shining Sun and the efforts of the Fifth Circle Magi before him. Hints of prophecies so dire the fate of the world hung in the balance danced just outside of reach, whispers of doom and salvation alike haunted both his waking hours and his dreams, but always the Shining Sun deflected him, telling Bleak Mountain such burdens were for the Immortals, that the prophecies held the seed of their own undoing, as all such things did, and meddling by well-meaning mortals had helped cause many such prophecies to unfold into their very worst incarnations time and time again.

But now, with the Succupony’s unwitting aid, the first real break in decades had landed in his lap. The Mirror Portal, Tartarus, both these things broke the normal rules of the Universe and defied the Endless Cycle, one a device that could bridge two realities and bathe the crosser in the unfathomable energies of the Between, and the other, the demi-plane ruled by the Goddess of Death and Judgement, Gothica, where time was immaterial and all the rules of creation were subject to the whim of the demi-plane’s ever-cloaked mistress.

Ironic, that the failure that the Shining Sun so wishes to bring back into the fold should give me the first key to securing my rightful destiny as Celestia’s Lord and Master. Once I am beyond the confines of age and no longer need to use all of my internal alchemy to keep my mind and body from aging beyond use, I can break the bonds of the Blood-Oath, prove my worthiness to the Shining Sun, marry her and become the Emperor that this soft, decadent land needs to fulfil its destiny. Bleak Mountain smiled grimly as he lifted the hoof he’d used to knock all those scrolls and papers off the Succupony’s desk, and the sketch-covered page he’d stuck to his hoof in the process …

The Pillar, the Lover, the Dreamer and the Hope-Bringer. Four of the five Princesses the prophecy speaks of that we need to save ourselves from the Unspoken One. Sunset may have just given me the cipher I need to unlock the Princess Prophecies without needing to wheedle and plead with Celestia, and save the world with my own hooves. Chuckling, Bleak Mountain used his magic to fold up the paper neatly and slipped it under his robes, his runic tattoos flickering as he drew on the ley-lines under the castle to bolster his own magic for a teleportation spell back to his own, heavily shielded quarters. A fitting reward for all these long years of service, for a prodigy who never truly got the acclaim I deserved. Once I have proven my worth, brought all the Alicorns to heel and Equestria with them, I will bring order to this world, by spell, steel and law, and finally fulfil my rightful destiny!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike tried very, very hard.

There were few beings in Ponyville who could deny that, whatever Spike put his efforts towards, the young Drake held back little in the way of effort or enthusiasm.

So needless to say, trying to rally the Crusaders to taking care of Fluttershy’s animal residents was something he’d tackled with his best claw forwards, despite his trepidation about a great many things he’d be dealing with under the current situation.

No Twilight to run to for when the inevitable Crusade-themed disaster hit.

No Applejack to be the voice of common sense and reason that the Crusaders would listen to.

No Rarity to whine them into submission.

And of course, three young mares to whom he had some very strong and complication feelings towards all in the effects of a false estrus and, judging from the messes he’d had to clean up over the past few days, very sexually active and wielding both sets of equipment on each other with wild abandon, without any ‘adult’ supervision worth a damn, all running around and doing their own thing.

Trixie had tagged along, her golden torc and new tail drawing more attention that the Showmare herself had from the townsponies, but apparently having the long-term residents of Ponyville being told that Trixie was on permanent Crusader-watching duties under Twilight’s orders was apparently punishment enough that even her most vocal opponents swallowed their complaints or wished her the best.

Of course, Spike had hit a snag when they’d hit Fluttershy’s cottage: Zecora. The Zebra shaman apparently had some sort of business proposition for the blue Unicorn, and after a whispered conversation, Trixie had asked Spike in a polite but very forceful tone to kindly keep the Crusaders away from the cottage for an hour while she and Zecora finished their ‘transaction’.

“An hour you say, I think that you lie, I need but two minutes to let that seed fly.” The Shaman had smirked, with Trixie whipping her head around, glaring at the Zebra, then turning back to Spike with a dangerous twinkle in her eyes.

“Spike, the Humble and Gracious Trixie requests you keep the Crusaders far away from the cottage. We’re going to be quite loud before the end of Zecora’s transaction and Trixie doesn’t need an audience for this kind of show.”

“A poor performer is one who can’t handle a crowd, but I suppose my treatments would make one be loud.” Zecora had piped up again, still grinning wickedly, and again Trixie’s head had whipped around to give the Zebra a seething look.

“And Trixie does not think that Zecora the soon-to-be-limping would not wish to have the Crusaders involved in our transaction, yes? If Zecora does wish this … Trixie thinks you’re going to have to be waiting for a few more months at the very least! Also that Trixie should probably go find Officer Rulebook right away!”

Zecora cocked a head at Trixie, then blanched and shook her head rapidly. “Not what this one meant, my words went with the wrong flow, I only thought that the Crusaders would appreciate a show.”

“Trixie does … not exactly object, but Trixie has since learned the Crusaders lack control. Audience participation would not be wise for Trixie or the Crusaders right now, and Trixie doubts that the Crusaders would remain just bystanders!”

Leaving the two older mares to whatever act or transaction or whatever it was they had been bickering about, Spike had left, quickly dragging the Crusaders out to the border of the Everfree to check on the songbirds and rabbits. Surely repairing bird-houses and removing refuse from around the burrows would have been safe, but inevitably, three dirty Crusaders and a even dirtier Drake decided that they’d had enough of being pelted with seeds, grass and the occasional acorn and headed back to Fluttershy’s cottage.

The moans should have been Spike’s first warning that he’d missed the signals from Zecora and Trixie, but being hot, dirty, hungry and frustrated with the touchy-feely antics of the girls, and the knowledge that it had to be the aphrodisiacs and the Spear Maiden Spell making them act so towards him, leaving Spike cursing his own strong moral code, the young Drake had been absolutely fixated on getting some privacy and taking matters into his own claws under a hot shower before his already fraying control slipped.

But no, now here he was, crammed in-between the Crusaders as all three of them crowded around him to watch, wide-eyed, the show being put on by the two older mares in the middle of Fluttershy’s couch.

Never going to be able to sit on that couch and drink Fluttershy’s tea without wondering if the stains ever really come out. The last sane, rational part of Spike’s mind snarked as his claws sank into the wooden window-frame for fear of grabbing at himself, or worse yet, the quivering Crusaders around him, at least one of which was clopping furiously from the sounds coming behind him, but the way they’d packed themselves in around and behind him made it impossible to see whom without gouging somepony in the face with his ear-frills or head-ridge. At the very least, at this angle, the girls can’t see I’m also happy to see the show!

And what a damn show it was. Whatever he might have felt about Trixie as a fellow being, Spike would never have denied that Trixie filled out in all the right places, not enough to be lush but more than enough that svelte was not an appropriate term for her. And Zecora’s giant ass had long been a secret talking point between himself, Snips and Snails. So to see Zecora on her back, back-legs kicking and thrashing in the air and a steady stream of moans and half-mumbled encouragements as Trixie fairly pounded down into the prone, meaty Zebra shaman, causing ripples of skin and fur on both parties whenever their bodies collided, was something of a dark dream come true.

“We. Have. To. Go.” Spike hissed under his breath, gingerly pulling his claws out of the window-frame and none-too-gently elbowing the Crusaders back.

“But …” Sweetie Belle whispered back with such longing in her voice, before rationality apparently returned to at least one of the other Crusaders, and softly bickering, the foursome tried to untangle themselves as both of the older mares inside the cottage grew louder and louder. Being the closest to the window and thus the last to leave, Spike was treated to seeing Zecora lock her legs around Trixie’s back, shouting out loud as the blue show-mare’s hips shook once, twice, thrice and then collapsed on-top of her, a steady stream of nectar pouring down the insides of Trixie’s thighs.

“T-told you it would not be two mih-whoo-minutes, did Trixie not?” The group froze as they heard Trixie’s bold, if fatigued, words, fearing that if they moved now, a single mis-step would expose their involuntary peeping.

“Proud though you are, many shots did you give, but don’t you pull out or I will leak like a sieve!” The Zebra panted back, and Spike’s eyes widened as he watched Trixie stand up … with Zecora clinging to her underside like a leech. “Carry me to the kitchen with all haste and speed, my cauldron I need to catch all of this seed!”

“Trixie the Enduring and Potent will comply, but your ass is heavy!”

“You did not complain with two hoof-fuls of my ass, so move your plot and stow away the sass!”

Watching the awkward scene, and the appreciative grunts from both mares as, with each step, Zecora bounced down and then back up, impaling herself again and again on the turgid black shaft that grew from just ahead Trixie’s twitching treasure, Spike winced as he felt his own weapon finally disobey him, sliding out from between his pale olive-green underscales and begin steaming as his hot dragon blood began to pulse through it.

Terrific. I just popped a boner in-front of the Crusaders. Who probably are already at half-mast at the very least. After catching the tail-end of Trixie stuffing Zecora like a Hearthswarming Tofu Turkey. The young Drake sighed softly and ducked beneath the window-frame as the sloshing couple staggered on Trixie’s shaking legs into the cottage’s kitchen, risking a glance behind him.

Sure enough, being slightly shorter than the three Crusaders, who were now standing on their hind-legs to look over his shoulders and into the cottage, all three were standing ‘at attention’ and Sweetie had a hoof firmly fretting away between the cleft of her legs, while Scootaloo and Applebloom had settled for wrapping a hoof around each other’s ‘spears’ and were jerking away madly.

And just like that, Spike snapped. The frustration, the repressment of his own desires due to living with Twilight, the arousal he constantly fought down, all bubbled up to the surface, and for a split second Spike feared he was going to suffer another Greed-growth.

Except it wasn’t greed for material wealth to possess. No, this was far more primal, more immediate than any need for a Horde as Spike’s body trembled, shuddered and grew, however slightly, his belly slowly going flat as his legs lengthened and his spike stretched …until all three Crusaders piled down on top of him with muffled yelps.

“Get off me!” Spike hissed in alarm, feeling his scales and claws itch madly as the growth-spurt continued at it’s own laborious pace, not aided in the slightest by three hot bodies pressing down on him in interesting ways.

Scootaloo had landed on his right claw, crotch-first, while one of Sweetie’s small, perky breasts was currently molding itself to the other, while Applebloom had, by dint of being the middle-mare, found herself belly to belly with Spike, and the young Drake could barely hold back his groan as the growing, steaming head of his sceptre slid against the equally-hot entrance to the Apple’s vault, catching for a precious moment on her entrance before grinding past, it’s upper surface clamped down on by Applebloom’s snatch.

And judging by the look in her eyes as the two unfortunate, horny teens started into each other’s eyes, muzzles almost touching, the chance meeting of their lower halves had been both as shocking and pleasant for Applebloom as it had been for Spike.

That, or she had noticed his growth spurt and was worried he’d explode in size and blow their cover.

“Ssssh! Trixie is back!” Scootaloo hissed back, but squirmed nonetheless as Spike’s claw strained and pressed against the trap of the fold between her legs, the orange Pegasus hunching low to avoid detection even as her wings shot up into the air, while Sweetie just whimpered and folded up next to Applebloom and Spike, eyes wide but unseeing.

“Hmmmph. Trixie does not like this. Can you hurry up, Zecora?” The blue show-mare’s hoof appeared on the edge of the windowsill and the sharp point of her horn loomed out the opening. “Young Spike can only keep the Crusaders busy for so long, and the house reeks of your musk!”

“Your scent is strong too, do not deny, not stop dodging your work and make this mess fly!” the Zebra shouted back from deeper within the cottage, and with a loud huff, Trixie’s horn was surrounded with a pale blue glow, levitating the covers closed over the window. The foursome didn’t move so much as an inch, holding their breaths for a variety of reasons, as Trixie’s hoof-steps faded back into Fluttershy’s kitchen.

“We-we’ve got to move! Ssssspike, can you get your claw out of me?” Scootaloo managed to squeak out, face bright red, as she squirmed on the offending digits, while Sweetie just laid in a lump next to Spike, biting her bottom lip and worrying at it with her teeth.

“C-can you get off of me first? K-kinda scared to move right now.” Spike stammered back, blinking as he felt his ‘growth spurt’ start to sputter and fail. “Bloom, can you get off?”

“I think I just did …” The blushing farm-mare whispered back, getting up onto her knees and trying to stand, before her legs failed, dropping her back onto her belly and firmly onto Spike’s erection.

Spike had expected many things upon his graduation to adulthood. A rose-petal covered bed, Rarity in a gorgeous white wedding dress, soft classical music in the background.

Having his first taken by accident by the convulsing body of Applebloom, muffling her cry as her body struggled to contain his newly-enlarged length inside her body by biting down onto his collar-bone was not one of them, but he could certainly not fault the sensations as everything the rumours and secret meetings had talked them up to be, his body arching and claws flexing as he struggled in turn to not shout in delight at the hot, tight, wet embrace around his most sensitive place.

Scootaloo and to a lesser extent, Sweetie Belle also were caught up in the happy disaster, one of Spike’s larger digits flexing just right to press hard against a now-familiar target deep in Scootaloo’s depths, while Sweetie found herself letting go of her bottom lip to bite at her hoof as Spike’s large, warm claw grasped her breast and squeezed.

For several moments they stayed just like that, Spike’s body slowly slumping to the ground with Applebloom’s form still plastered over his, the young Drake desperately trying to rally his confused and now very conflicted mind to a sane and rational angle from which to approach this untenable situation, how to salvage his friendship with the Crusaders after such a debacle, when Applebloom, still impaled on him, shifted her head down to Spike’s ear-frill and whispered.

“Want to continue this at the club-house?”

Logic, go take a walk. A large, club-wielding, animal skin-wearing version of Spike grunted in his mind.

Fuck that, we’re going all in, boys! A slender, elegantly-dressed idealized version of Spike said back in a culture tone.

“Spike. Want.” The young Drake whispered back, claws growing bolder as both Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle squeaked in surprise before leaning in to peck Spike on the cheeks.

Chapter 78

CHAPTER 78

“We shall return, Sister Comfrey. A much more relaxed visit, either myself or my sister, and we’ll bring some cakes and tea.” Celestia said loudly, before leaning down to nuzzle the top of the ancient Unicorn’s head, the fragile old dame crying again, but this time in happiness, as the Royal Guards and several of the locals set about tidying up the depo-station.

Twilight silently vowed to never again underestimate the ingenuity of her friends. Especially a certain party-pony had been bored stiff on the train ride and had apparently channelled that frustration into making an impromptu party with just some bales of hay, some edibles from the snack-bar in the Friendship Express’s small kitchen and an improbable amount of confetti.

At the very least, the Sister hadn’t had a heart attack when Pinkie’s infamous Party Cannon had been pulled out of literally nowhere to blast the entire group with confetti, but the Royal Guards, especially the Thestrals, had nearly gone into a frenzy and had assumed they were under ‘attack’. Thankfully they’d quickly noticed it was confetti and not cannon-balls raining down on them and gone along with the mood, but the newest Royal had noticed that Bulwark had all but glued himself to her side, and the Thestrals were never more than ten paces away from Luna afterwards.

“We most certainly will!” Luna chirped, being slowly coaxed into letting go of her mutual death-grip with several giggling foals by her Thestrals in the process. Is still puzzled Twilight how somepony who rivalled herself for social awkwardness could be so adept at handling small, rambunctious children.

“If I can, could I also …” Twilight chipped in, hoping to give at least the impression of friendliness given the absurd situation they were trapped in, but given the enthusiastic nodding from the Sister’s two burly handmares, her offer was taken in the right vein.

Slothbow Crawl, still trapped in her sloth form, glared at Twilight from underneath Applejack’s barrel, using her new claws to sloooooowly form a crude approximation of a favourite insulting claw-gesture the Gryphons used before a flushing Pinkie swiped Applejack’s hat and threw it over the offending claw before any of the assembled fillies and colts could see.

For their own part, Fluttershy had come out of her shell once a few of the farmers asked if she’d be willing to come around to their farms and ask the local critters to leave their crops alone. A short negotiation later and the promise that whatever crops weren’t worthy of the weekly market the small village held could be sacrificed to the larger animals like the rabbits, squirrels and birds, and the butter-yellow Pegasus had promised to fly over with some extra bags of seeds for the children to make a ‘practice’ field for them to grow plants that, while not edible for Ponies, would serve to feed the local wildlife and keep them away from the farmers’ crops in the long-term.

Waiting for the Sisterhood’s … patsies? Stooges? Unwitting pawns? Whatever they were, to leave seemed to take forever, but eventually it was just Twilight, Luna, the Bearers and Celestia and the Elements … and over a dozen Guards all waiting awkwardly as golden magic carved runes into the air and the ground around them, a massive dome of shifting, interlocking figures as Celestia prepared for a long-range teleport.

She’s far faster than before. Twilight thought with no little concern, her eyes flicking to the golden barding her former teacher wore, which had now returned to a more armor-like configuration than the regal accoutrements it had reformed into when Sister Comfrey had been revealed to them. Is it the Regalia? I know the Princess has always had too much power to channel all at once like a normal Unicorn, but this is … there’s eighteen different protective wardings that I can understand, and at least as many that are in older forms that I can’t accurately translate. I’m not even going to try to count the counter-sigils for teleportation repulsion effects or matter-restoration magic-circles she’s putting up simultaneously.

The thought that Celestia had always had this at her hooves, yet chose to not use it for the sake of world peace was both comforting and frustrating. On an intellectual level, Twilight could easily grasp not wandering around the world in a suit of armor made out of compressed divine energy would have done wonders for placating mortal leaders who could only see rivals or challengers in any powerful individual, but the fact that the Princess, her Princess, had thrown Twilight, and her friends by dint of proximity, into the lion’s jaws over and over again while having enough power to move the Sun at will, was still a bitterly sore point in Twilight’s mind.

“Before we teleport …” Celestia said in a friendly, familiar tone as the cloud of shifting golden sigils and runes thickened around them. “I will be teleporting us directly into an old meeting hall, so we will be guaranteed privacy, especially since a number of Royal Guards and servants have seen fit to clear the area of all beings and clutter to avoid … accidents … when we arrive, but I must insist we all move as quietly and quickly as we can to Twilight’s private quarters in the castle.”

“Wait, we’re goin’ to Twilight’s … ah thought we were gonna be talkin’ to this Mother o’ Stones?” Applejack asked nervously, standing in a shivering cluster with Fluttershy, Slothbow Crawl and Kindness, obviously unsettled at so much magic on display.

“Sadly, the Mother of Stones will not arrive until she can gather enough of her consciousness in one place to manifest an Avatar for us to interact with, and that could take hours given how spread-out she normally is, or she could be waiting for us when we arrive. Thus, you can stay in Twilight’s quarters, which are heavily guarded and shielded against most forms of intrusion, and rest up until the Mother of Stones makes her entrance.” The Solar Princess answered, smiling benevolently down at her little Ponies. “And I am quite certain I don’t need to remind anypony to keep yourselves as far away from the Northern and Southern Wings of the castle as possible? While I do have a blood-pact from the Changelings and their Queen to cause no harm to my … our citizens, my apologies to you both, Luna, Twilight, I am taking no chances. Not with Twilight now carrying two hostile Elements and Luna and Twilight’s, ahem, sympathetic responses to each other.”

“So who’s in the Southern Wing that we need to avoid? What could possibly rival the Changelings in terms of hazard to our persons?” Luna grumbled, shifting a wing over Twilight’s back, to which Twilight leaned into the contact.

Buck what anyone thinks. We both need a hug right now. Twilight frowned at the thought of having to apologise for her relationship, and snuck a wing over Luna’s back, somewhat miffed she was slightly too short to give her marefriend a proper hug back.

“Cadence and Shining Armor are there, or rather they have been given rooms appropriate to their station in that wing, along with their retinue. I … hope Cadence was gentle with her questioning? I needed to make sure Cadence didn’t level the castle trying to get to the Changelings and I am sorry to say you two were the only card I had left to play in that fight.”

Luna and Twilight flinched, looked at each other, then turned back to the eldest Princess and gave her seething looks.

“We’ll talk later.” Twilight and Luna said at the same time.

“O-oooh, yes, I rather imagine we shall.” A slightly-sickly looking Celestia agreed, her benevolent smile slipping slightly as the rush of golden runes around the group grew erratic for a moment before speeding up, bathing the assembled Ponies and Elementals in glorious golden light. “Well, before anything else happens, everypony, hold onto your lunches, a teleportation of this size and length can be a little rough …”

And before anypony could utter further complaints or concerns, the runes, sigils and symbols all glowed with intense light, merging together into a completely sealed dome of golden sun-fire before fading away, leaving nothing behind but a faint dusting of ash from the now-smoking concrete in a large circle where once the Ponies had stood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Success, Cubic?” Beaker asked, raising his gaze from a chaotic spread of notes and paperwork to look at the young scientist, who while still looking a little green around the gills, held herself proudly.

“Yes, sir. The … insemination worked. If the detection spell is working as intended, fertilization has occurred and I am officially pregnant, although at such an early stage it is possible I could still lose the embryo if I am not careful.” The Unicorn shifted slightly, glancing back at the door as if dreading the return of Bluebone and his attentions. Not an unfair concern, but Beaker did hope her scientific ambitions could eclipse such petty emotional concerns. He could not waste time and training on an assistant who could be so easily distracted.

“Excellent. I will be putting you on light duties and assigning you an orderly. No field-work, no contact with any test-subjects of Grade K or higher, no spell-casting or magical experimentation above simple telekinetic manipulations until the end of your first trimester.” The lanky, dead-eyed head of the Shadow Council’s research division said in a tone that was, for him at least, disturbingly eager. “You will spend your time going over my notes and files, arranging and categorizing them and making sure I have not overlooked anything before we attempt the final fusion attempt of the hybridized womb, a process I am certain will take at least a year to attempt with all the preparation and ground-work before us. Anything you require, you may request under my name, so long as it does not risk in any way, shape or form the test subject you are currently cultivating.”

Cubic nodded, smiling now.

“Furthermore, you are going to be given a battery of magical augmentations to ensure the embryo survives to full term, including spending the next three weeks in a hyperbaric chamber, effective immediately, to ensure you are kept separate from any illnesses or diseases your co-workers may unwittingly be carrying. Our access to the genetic material of the Platinum bloodline is already limited in scope to begin with, thus we are unlikely to get a second attempt if you miscarry.” Beaker continued, his features fading to their usual dull, expressionless mask-like state. “If you have any private experiments or social requirements that will need to be fulfilled in the next three weeks, please find a way to cancel them before your quarantine begins.”

“I do’t have much of a social life, sir, too much risk of being exposed or followed back to the facility by meddling acquaintances that way. As far as my family is aware, I’m just an intern at the School’s research department and other than my great-aunt, I don’t have much contact with my family unless I absolutely have to, and both they and I are happy with that arrangement.” The young mare shook her head, her smile turning into a grin as her pale-green mane cascaded madly around her pale-peach coloured head and neck. If he were interested in such banal things, Beaker might have found the Mare physically attractive. “I have no personal experiments, none that have ever gone beyond a theoretical stage at the least. Too busy working on the Hybrid Womb or the, errr, previous attempt. Sorry, sir, I know it’s a sore subject.”

“I take no offence, Cubic Measurement, Project Chimera Prince was unlikely to succeed in any event but it did significantly advance our understanding of the body’s innate rejection of foreign tissue and how competing immune systems react to being forced to share a single host-body.” The dead-eyed stallion turned his gaze from his new personal assistant to the cage that had once hung from the ceiling of the primary experimentation chamber, and was now being ferried to a new location, one deeper and further down into the earth, where the experiment to use all of the stolen Dragon’s Fire and a utterly unique teleportation chamber to finish the task the Shadow Council had given to him so many months ago. If he were not a Stallion of logic, he could have sworn he could feel the hate of the creatures inside the cage even from this distance on his back. “Remember, for scientists like ourselves, every failure is a stepping stone on the path to understand, to perfection. With the information and knowledge we have gleaned from the previous Projects, the Hybrid Womb Project has a full seventy-eight percent chance of success, even accounting for the current political situation’s impact on our ability to harvest genetic material and the Shadow Council’s internal bickering.”

“Speaking of which, the Councillors agreed to my conditions. Bluebone will be kept far from you and the subject, regardless of how his legal battle plays out with the Princess. The offspring, regardless of gender, will be raised as you see fit so long as the Shadow Council retains access to a steady supply of the Platinum line’s genetic material.” Beaker continued, noting with some small joy that Cubic’s posture became more and more confident, more relaxed, with each passing moment.

Excellent. A stressed mother tended to miscarry far more than a pacified and relaxed one.

“I assume they won’t want to kill the child. So we’ll be taking blood, tissue, maybe eggs or sperm samples once the child ages enough?” Cubic asked, and Beaker paused for a moment. He had not expected Cubic to refer to the test subject as a child, given her distaste for the sire …

“Naturally. Bluebone is old and is unlikely to be able to provide more genetic samples of any scientific worth, and Blueblood is notoriously hostile to the Shadow Court’s political ideals, and if he ever learned the identities of the members of the Shadow Council, it is highly likely he would expend every resource available to him to see them all hunted down and exiled from Equestria, no matter the cost to himself.” Turning his gaze fully to Cubic’s eyes, the scientist pressed forwards. “But why call the subject a ‘child’, Cubic? I take it you are placing some emotional investment in it?”

“Well … yes, sir. I will be carrying the child to term, raising it, molding its mind. Some level of emotional attachment and baggage is inevitable between us, so since attempting to maintain a proper level of scientific detachment between us is doomed to fail, I decided to instead include the inevitable attachment and emotional investment into our plans and move forwards while compensating for such things.” Cubic nodded, obviously unaware of Beaker’s concerns about her, and pushed a lock of her mane out of her face. “Besides, a strong, positive emotional attachment will only help the child adapt in a healthy manner to the stresses of growing up in the middle of Canterlots political schemes, and I fully intend for the child to carry on our work with the Shadow Court, and the Shadow Council that leads the Court, once they come of age.”

Beaker stopped and considered Cubic’s reasoning, finding it sound if slightly less detached than he had hoped the intelligent and driven young scientist would have been. It would make sense to encourage the child to develop a strong emotional bond to Cubic, since in doing so she could ensure the child would not fuss or fear the harvesting of genetic samples, and the prospect of raising a member of the Platinum bloodline to favour the research division, especially considering Bluebone’s advanced age and his pre-existing progeny’s hostility …

“Hmmm…” Beaker stopped, switched mental gears and let the dull, dreary reality fade away into the glorious realm of logic and extrapolation. It was highly unlikely that the Shadow Court would ever publicly topple the Princesses without some drastic shift in the political balance of power. They lacked the good-will and influence of the Princess of the Sun and the growing popularity of the Princess of the Moon. Their Unicorns-first attitude also lowered their chances of a non-violent change in leadership of the country given their influence held little sway outside of Canterlot and the immediate surrounding regions.

And if Bluebone should slip into the Princess’s clutches and have to be silenced, then the only other known survivor of the Platinum bloodline was ‘Prince’ Blueblood … whose hostility towards the Shadow Council, the secretive Nobles who backed, funded and directed the Shadow Court’s public endeavours was legendary. And despite being sexually active with a great many mares, from information gleaned from both more public, if less than reputable sources, and the hard-won intelligence from the short-lived spies into the Blueblood Household reported, Blueblood had yet to produce an heir of any sort.

While he had had to alert the Shadow Council of Bluebone’s visit and subsequent ‘deposit’, they had been less interested in the foal and more its potential future uses to them as individuals. With Bluebone likely soon to disappear, either into Horseshoe Bay or under an assassin’s knife, and Blueblood quiet likely sterile, then the subject that Cubic Measurement carried under her heart was likely the sole hope through which the Platinum bloodline could continue to be cultivated, and the only hope of uniting the Nobility of Canterlot under a single banner if the Shadow Court actually could depose the Princesses and invoke the ancient laws that promised the Old Bloodlines that once ruled Unicornia could take their places on the Throne.

A rare few individuals in the Shadow Council might take an interest in the offspring’s emotional growth upon meeting the offspring, but most would be more interested in binding the sole thread of Princess Platinum’s line, and the political advantages that would bring, to their own households, specifically their own bloodlines. The vast majority would be thinking of Marriage Contracts and squabbling with their fellows for the chance to become next protector of the Platinum Bloodline. Their interactions would likely be limited to attempts to bribe, cocere or otherwise bring the offspring to favour their own Houses for a spouse, rather than any serious attempt to befriend or bond with the subject.

And however much Beaker despised politics and the inane social dances Ponies and other mortal creatures invented to try and determine their role in the social pecking order as a waste of valuable time and energy, cultivating such a uniquely-placed individual to not only bring sound logic and scientific order to the Shadow Council’s chaotic squabbling for dominance against each other, and against the ruling Diarches, but such a being could, if they assumed the throne, finally start pushing Equestria to embrace true progress, not merely rely on such antiquated methods as soldiers armed with sword, spear and shield or crude ballista, or the laughably simple mechanisms of steam engines!

“To be able to practice our disciplines openly, Cubic … perhaps you are right on the subject of the … child.” Beaker said without warning, causing the nervously-fidgeting Mare to jump in place, who had remained silent as her chief entered one of his infamous periods of internal debate. “Raised correctly, with an eye to embracing the glory of science and mastering the quagmire of politics, the child could very well do for our era what the Princesses did during the Age of Wandering. It is of the bloodline of Princess Platinum, and the child of one of the most brilliant minds that the Canterlot Scientific Society misguidedly discarded, after all.”

The Mare’s eye twitched for a moment before she took a small breath and nodded once, sharply.

“Do not worry, I suspect once the child comes of age that we may enter them into the hum-drum of the public school system, they will blow the socks off those who scorn you, I and the majority of our comrades down here in the ‘Pit’, as the Shadow Council so amusingly labels this place. Imagine the looks on their faces when the new prodigy for scientific advancement in Equestria turns out to be the child of a brilliant mind they hypocritically turned away for something so simple and inoffensive as grave-robbing.” Beaker’s eyes twinkled with a cold form of amusement at seeing those puffed-up grade-schoolers who masqueraded as the scientific geniuses of their time being pulled down from their perches and true scientific minds taking their places, elevating Equestria from the mental rut it had been stuck in for the past few centuries.

“The public school … what?Why?” Cubic’s shock was annoying, but understandable. She was thinking long-term, but not in the same way that he could. Not step by step, plans within plans. Few did, or would, and the only one Beaker knew of who could and often did such a thing was, sadly, well under the hoof of the Princess of the Sun.

If only she could be convinced to work with him, the advances that could be made …

“We will need to prove the child’s parentage, after all, if the Shadow Council’s ambitions are to be realized, and our funding is to be secured for future experimentation. And part of the Canterlot Public School system’s registration is recording every child’s blood-type, along with other physical and biological measurements, for the sake of future medical issues as well as to try to keep an accurate bloodline record of so many ponies crammed together whenever spring hits and estrus causes a breeding frenzy. If you claim Bluebone sired the child on you by force, that you were destitute and needed the money, or whatever reason you decide will earn you and the child the most sympathy from those around it, then even if Bluebone is long gone from this world by that stage, the child will share enough genetic similarity with Blueblood that the test will still register a positive.” The bland-faced scientist clapped his hooves together once, a soft, singular gesture of approval as understanding dawned on Cubic’s soft face. “Such a revelation will, of course, do all the rounds of Canterlot’s odious printing houses and radio-stations, and the ‘proof’, both of the legal variety and that of the ironically-named common sense of the Ponies who peruse such things, and before the child reaches their majority, the whole world will ‘know’ that it is the bearer of the Platinum Bloodline.”

“Sir, that’s … genius. If we can do that, then the Princess has to give at least some form of support to the child or she’ll run the risk of the printing houses crucifying her for allowing one of the Three Royal Bloodlines to die out, given that Blueblood has yet to sire an offspring of his own.” Cubic’s eyes brightened and a wide, shark-like smile spread across her face. “If the Princesses are successfully accused of anti-Unicorn sentiments, a good half of Canterlot would riot, and that would be all the ammunition the Shadow Court would need to instigate a vote of No Confidence in the Diarchy and petition for their abdication. And the Shadow Council will all want to have the child think favourably of them since it will likely be the only effective source of Princess Platinum’s bloodline to inject into their own families, and thus their own potential claim to the Throne if the Princesses can be forced to abdicate becomes the strongest claim left!”

“That is the strategy I believe will work the best, but for now, you must be kept secure, calm and in the best of health. If the Platinum bloodline fails, well, while I only care for the Shadow Council’s plans as a means to advance our scientific understanding, without that bloodline, the Unicorns lose their one and only chance to reclaim the Throne from the Princesses and the only common cause the members of the Shadow Council have with each other.” The dead-eyed Chief Scientist looked Cubic in the eyes and spoke with absolutely certainty in his voice. “Whether the Hybrid Womb project succeeds or fails, right now, you carry the only future for the Shadow Council and its ambitious members. Do not forget that, nor do not allow yourself to be coerced by the Councillors.”

“As of this moment, Cubic Measurement, you are the most important being on this planet.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrysalis sighed and looked at her offspring, hugging their stuffed toys, then looked out the window of the ‘Red Room’ Celestia has stuffed her into, over the glistening spires and immaculate streets of the capital of Equestria.

It might once have been hers, every stone, spire and Pony within, had the fates been kinder and her mind more focused on the task at hand and not torn between trying to figure out how to re-enchant Shining’s mind on the spot without reducing him to a drooling husk in the process and seething rage at the pink Princess whom she’d been impersonating for all that time stealing Chrysalis’s favorite stallion back.

But now … turning her attention back to the lawyers assigned to her under some equine madness that allowed the guilty party free access to legal representation, at the taxpayer’s expense no less, the once-and-future Queen noted that two of the poor saps seemed more apt to wet themselves if they made eye-contact with her, and the other two, older and perhaps more jaded individuals, merely raised an eye and asked if she had anything to ask.

“Nothing beyond what we have already discussed, good ponies. I attacked due to a belief, falsely now I understand, that Equestria was a failing country that would be easily destroyed by an outside force. My informats, rogue nobles unhappy with the status quo, lied to me and gave me distorted information and biased reports, and I assumed I would be liberating a country from a despot who was using a religious belief in her supposed immortality and moving of celestial objects to maintain her grip on power.’ Chrysalis replied tartly, then sighed again and gave what she hoped was a friendly smile, by Pony standards at least. “Let us be honest with each other, I am guilty as sin of invading your capital and attempting to launch a military coup. My intentions, however, were indeed to protect the citizens of Equestria, and her allied nations, from an invading army that will likely make itself known within the next two or three decades, if I am remembering the Empress’s reproductive cycle correctly.”

“Indeed, that is the main thrust of our defence, that while you have committed crimes against the state and her people, you are willing to make amends and explain your actions. While we’ll have a great deal of trouble proving your claims of invaders from across the Badlands as the main impulse behind your actions, especially since that part of the world is notoriously unrecorded due to the hostility of both the region and its inhabitants, your willingness to bind yourself to the nation via a blood-pact invoking non-aggression between both parties can be leveraged in your favour.” The older lawyer on the left, a pale pink Stallion with a dull two-toned orange and yellow mane and tail said in gentle, conciliatory tones, while his two young interns, both Mares, nodded feverishly while avoiding direct eye-contact with the Changeling Queen. “And your willingness to allow our Magi unrestricted access to study the powers and physiologies of the Changeling people can be used as well. Proof that Changelings are not monsters but simply equine-like beings with unique needs, and fully willing to integrate into our society will help our efforts to curb any paranoia or us-vs-them attitudes the media will try to spin to up their sales.”

“That’s … going to be our biggest challenge, actually. The Princess put a great deal of social stock in making sure your case goes off as fairly and openly as possible. Her detractors know this, and will be attempting to pervert the course of justice by whipping Equestria into a frenzy of anti-Changeling hysteria.” The other older Lawyer, a Mare whose left side of her dark brown face had been marred by something, leaving her muzzle, cheek and the area just under her eye hairless and covered in what appeared to be pock-marks, slurred slightly, the left side of her muzzle restrained slightly by the scarring. “All the legal wrangling in the world won’t save us if you say or do anything to give the media ammunition to use against your people. I’ve seen it before with the refugee crises, whenever somepony high up the chain decides they don’t like a race or people and starts to stir up the media with the darkest, grimmest version of what is happening to try, using scare-monger tactics to place the blame for the situation onto the refugees fleeing their homelands, and then scare Ponies into rejecting the refugees to save ‘themselves’. And given your … history with Equestria, they won’t have to reach too far to get Ponies to fear your people.”

“In other words, play the sympathetic card to the hilt.” The Changeling Queen said with a smirk, to which the two older Lawyers shared a glance.

“That and focus on the plight of your people as your primary drive, a maternal urge to protect them at all costs. An entire species on the run from their tyrannical creator, knowing nothing of Harmony or friendship, and then being used by unscrupulous Nobles looking to cause trouble for the Princess will quite likely earn us a more lenient sentence for yourself and greater acceptance for your people than your usual … uhm …” The older male began, then stated fishing for the appropriate terminology that wouldn’t result in him being eaten.

“Raging bitchery and megalomaniacal gloating? Sarcasm bitter enough to melt holes through the floor?” The Changeling smirked at the Stallion.

“Well, if you’re cognisant of the fact, then that makes planning our strategies so much easier.” The scarred Mare replied without batting an eyelid, to which Chrysalis gave her a wicked grin. “Seriously, while we are bound to defend you in the courts to the very utmost of our abilities, please be serious about this as well. I believe in the wisdom of the Thrones and the information they have given us from you, and their own investigations into the matter, but you are going to be going in against Ponies whose self-interest and agendas you are about to violently undercut with your defence pleas, if not out their Houses for attempting a coup against the Solar Throne, and that could easily result in their entire House being exiled from the country. Anything you say, anything you do, anything a single member of your Hive does that could be used against you will be blown completely out of proportion and broadcasted across the world by these Ponies.”

“And lest we forget, my Sisters could arrive at any time, and buzz their way right into the middle of this poo-slinging troop of infighting monkeys you call a government.” Granting herself a small treat of melodramatic air, a fitting reward for being locked in the room with these stuffed shirts for the past three hours, Chrysalis flung a be-hold’d leg over her face and groaned dramatically. “Thankfully, the Hive-Mind will allow me to send early warning to them, and alert your Princess to when, where and how the other Changeling Hives will be entering her country. We should be able to avoid a great deal of ‘bad publicity’ that way.”

Chrysalis was about to continue to speak, when a rather urgent notice went racing through her Hive-Mind, and grumbling peevishly, the battered Queen pulled the blanket higher over her latest hatchlings in a vain attempt to shelter them from the rapidly-approaching fiend who kept trying to steal them away.

A series of rapid-fire knocks on her door were answered with a swift ‘Sod off!’ from Chrysalis, to which the knocker ignored and poked her head in.

Celestia, Raiser of the Sun, Bringer of Hope, Bearer of the Eternal Flame and Keeper of Harmony looked paler than a ghost, a feat in and of itself with her pristine white coat, and locked eyes on Chrysalis with a desperation the Changeling Queen had rarely seen on any of the many ‘hosts’ her Hive had collected over the past sixty years in Equestria.

“Chryssie, I need you to come to my chambers and meet Luna and Twilight right now. And bring the foals. Foals are good. They won’t eat me alive if there are foals in the room.”

“Am I to be thrown under the bus like your darling ‘niece’ and that adorably sexy spooning-machine she sto … pinc … recovered from my care?” Chrysalis muttered darkly, crossing her hooves over her chest, only to be gathered up in a glowing cloud of golden magic and levitated over the heads of the lawyers, foals, blanket, pillows and all.

“Celestia?” Chrysalis asked louder, feeling a stirring of panic in her chest as the panicking Sun-Goddess levitating her towards her doom remained silent.

Hive, if I do not make this out alive … I love you all. Each and every one of you. And yes, even you, Thorax, you little goof. The Changeling Queen sent through the Hive-Mind, along with orders to remain in their chambers.

She could feel her Sisters coming, after all. Celestia would, without fail, find some way to bring them into the capital and look after Chrysalis’s Hive and children if Chrysalis herself perished. It was not as bitter as she had imagined, and found herself chagrined by the feeling of … gratitude and acceptance that flowed through her amidst the cacophony of individual responses from her surviving Drones, Guards and Infiltrators. Part of that gratitude came from her own Changelings, who knew their Queen had arranged things to ensure the terrifying aloneness of being without a Hive-Mind, without a Queen to support such a thing, would be swiftly rectified, while the majority came from Chrysalis herself.

It was an alien, if welcome, sensation to have someling more powerful than herself in charge, rather than having to bear the burden of leadership on her own shoulders. It was galling to admit, but leaving things in Celestia’s gilded goody-horse-shoes hooves would probably be more beneficial to her children’s survival, all of them, than the cloak-and-dagger schemes Chrysalis had been trained to use from birth.

And then she was in a room full of Ponies and there was a purple-red light shining in her eyes.

“Yep, tha’s the bug.”

“Oh my goodness, she’s so … oh dear, oh dear.”

“Simply awful, how can she still be alive after looking like …”

“C’mon, it’s gotta be a trick, she can change shapes, she can probably pretend to look half-squashed too!”

“Either blast me or turn off your damn horn.” Chrysalis croaked, holding a be-hold’d leg over her eyes in a vain attempt to stop the slow combustion of her retinas. “I am in too much pain, too tired, and too over all of this to care, but at the very least aim higher. I don’t want the babies to be hurt.”

“Ba-babies?” That familiar, cursedly familiar voice squeaked, and Chrysalis mentally berated herself. She’d been planning on holding her children’s parentage as a trump card to use in the courts to ensure they, at least, could stay in Equestria if everything went to hell. Twilight Sparkle was one of the sharpest and most brilliant minds Ponykind had ever produced, it would be insane to assume she couldn’t immediately pick …

The blanket was taken away from her and her three youngest children peeped and mewled unhappily at being left exposed.

For precious seconds, only silence reigned before an overwhelming chorus of squee filled the air, and to Chrysalis’s bleary eyes, a pair of yellow, orange and dark-blue hooves shot out and carefully lifted up her offspring.

“Oh my gosh, we’ve never known what Changelings look like in their various life-cycles! We always assumed it was insectile, but if they give live-birth, then that means they’re more mammalian than …” Babbling happily, the purple nerd was looming over the Princess of Moodiness’s night-themed shoulder, the two of them with their muzzles almost touching one of her little girls, who seemed to be going back to sleep in the feathery cradle of Luna’s wing, while the other two were likewise the focus of intense cuddling and coddling, with the orange farm-hick holding the little white-coated male while the pink menace and the …

Chrysalis blinked, rubbed her eyes, then blinked again. Why is the would-be socialite with the bedazzled backside in a full-torso cast?

Her final child, however, was carefully cradled in not a yellow wing, but a cyan-blue one, the rainbow-haired adrenaline-junkie staring at the little buggy foal with awe on her face while the yellow recluse with the scary eyes fluttered about with a camera, taking shot after shot of the entire mess.

Turning her head to glare at Celestia, Chrysalis hissed under her breath at her ‘saviour’. “My children are not to be used as meat-shields again, Princess Celestia, or all bets are off. What would you have done if your neurotic student had decided to blast me on sight?”

“Twilight might be … a little under pressure right now, but she would never actively strike at anypony unless given reason to. You wrapped in bandages and being levitated like a sack of potatoes was not a valid reason to blast you, although she was very, errr, enthusiastic in her casting of a detection spell on both of us.” The Solar Princess whispered back, but looked far less panicked than she had when Celestia had abducted Chrysalis from the Red Rooms. “Besides, I needed to show Luna why I was willing to make such a large decision without her, given the …”

Something changed behind Celestia’s eyes as her gaze flicked from Chrysalis to her sister and pupil, then back to the Changeling Queen.

“Ah, the situation in Ponyville right now.” Celestia said, a faint trembling in her lips that bespoke of the urge to not smile, the flick of an ear and the slight ruffling of the feathers in her wings that whispered of nervousness.

Chrysalis turned her gaze back to the other two Princesses in the room and studied them, specifically what had changed from the last time she had … Oh. Oh my. No wonder Celestia is so on edge around those two.

“So …” Chrysalis began, as loudly as her ravaged body would allow and a wicked grin on her face as Celestia began to mutter ‘no no no no no no’ under her breath. “Exactly how long have Luna and Twilight been going at it like bunnies in the spring-time?”

Seven ponies all performed spit-takes at once, though thankfully none of it ended up on Chrysalis’s children, followed closely by the sound of both of Celestia’s armored fore-hooves making loud, meaty contact with her face.

As the spluttering Princesses of nerds and emos flailed at her and their friends all either burst into laughter or equally flustered spluttering, Chrysalis leaned in towards Celestia and whispered to her.

“Just because I have surrendered doesn’t give you the right to use my offspring as pawns in your own personal affairs, Celestia. Do it again and we’ll see how well your fellow Princesses take to learning about your other affairs? I've noticed the hitch in your step and the way you have a certain mismatched snake dogging your steps and giving you puppy-dog eyes, and I've kept my mouth shut out of respect for your privacy. Don't give me reason to stop respecting it.”

“… Duly noted. I still claim the right to snuggle the little darlings every time I see them, however.” Celestia grumbled back, levitating Chrysalis back into the air and over onto an over-stuffed chair as the room devolved into chaos such as that the Changeling Queen was surprised Discord didn’t spontaneously appear to claim it as his own.

“Five minutes only, each one.” The Changeling Queen retorted.

“Ten minutes each, and I’ll bring those honey-glazed eclairs. One for each of your Changelings.”

“Two for each of my Changelings and ten for me, and I will concede.”

“…. Fine. Now stop teasing my sister and my … my Twilight. She is my student again, but in a different field than before, and I cannot risk her flailing into politics blindly, as she lacks the understanding of the darkness inherent in such a domain, unlike you and I. Thus, I suspect you both will learn a great deal from each other before your time together is done.”

“I beg your pardon?” Chrysalis snapped loudly, shocked. She can’t possibly be suggesting …

“Twilight Sparkle has the brightest, sharpest mind of her generation, and can turn that intellect to any task with ease.” Celestia said in a voice that just oozed confidence, and made Chrysalis’s stomach turn into a cold pit. “Who better to defend you in the Courts and ease the integration of every Changeling Hive into Equestrian society than the greatest hero in living memory? Who better to champion the befriending of the Changelings than the Princess of Friendship herself?”

In the sudden near-silence of the room, with only the burbling of her children and the sound of somepony hyperventilating to fill the void, Chrysalis took the only sane option to Celestia’s latest revelation and choose the safety of unconsciousness, fainting dead away on her couch.

Chapter 79

CHAPTER 79

Luna found it oddly … disappointing to be back in Canterlot. A thousand years of longing for marble halls and gilded ornaments and the bowing of servants and sycophants, and a few days of adorkable snuggling with Twilight and she was now willing to throw it all away for a tent in the middle of the Everfree or a slightly-too-small bed in a small town’s library.

It was also both hilarious and disturbing to see Celestia shying away from Twilight, who was doing her best to glare at her former teacher and mentor. It reminded Luna of a kitten trying to attack a bear, while the bear was in turn trying its best not to accidentally squash the kitten.

“Well … I see your Regalia helps dealing with the side-effects of a long-range teleport. Is everypony well? Guards? Elements? Are we all accounted for?” Luna asked, shaking her head as she watched a stiff-legged Twilight stalking up to Celestia, who was using her trade-marked ‘court shuffle’ to try and keep at least a full two body-lengths away from Twilight without actually appearing to be actively moving away … which didn’t really work in a room where only three ponies had the stamina left to remain standing.

A chorus of groans, mutterings and whimpers was Luna’s response, and a quick scan of the room found no horrors of magic or accidental conjoinments, merely a baker’s dozen of ponies laying on the floor and trying their best to deal with the awful nausea and vertigo such a powerful teleportation spell often caused in those not used to such methods of travel. Even Kindness seemed a little green around the gills, and the other Elements, in their gemstone forms, seemed to be less than sparkly right now.

“Yes, although I do wish I did not have to wear it. The rest of the world tends to start panicking vigorously whenever I start walking around in anything more than my torc, crown and horse-shoes.” Celestia replied, keeping her gaze firmly focused on the irritated Twilight as she attempted to politely escape her former student’s personal space.

“At the very least we can be grateful that the Nightmare Spirit was not able to force me to summon the full might of my own Regalia. I think it might have been completely consumed fending off the Elements’ power, but it could have … Twilight, peace! Let my sister have a few minutes to compose herself before you start raking her over the coals!”

“No! If I even let her out of my sight for a minute, she’ll go bury herself in her duties as a Princess and be completely out of our reach, and I want to know exactly what we’re dealing with before the Mother of Stones shows up! I have two rogue Elements rattling around in my head, and the last thing I need is to wonder if she’s going to prioritize saving her children over pulling them out of my head!” Twilight snapped back, refusing to take her gaze off of Celestia. “I have enough to deal with without wondering if some all-powerful Elemental Demi-God is going to try and fuse two hostile personalities to my own in some sort of power-play in this Eternal War, another potential threat to Equestria that nobody but the Princesses knew about! Faust knows I’m learning that Princess Celestia has her hoof in far too many plots involving my friends, and once again I’m being told to sit down and wait like a dutiful child when my literally eternal future is at stake and I could end up the Princess of Destruction or the Princess of Insanity because somepony likes to play chessmaster!”

“Ooogh … Twilight, sorry for being so blunt, but knock it off. The Mother of Stones is coming to pull Magic and Generosity out of you and see what damage those two pieces of shale have done to you and Lady Rarity.” Honesty, now a small, rough lump of ametrine the size of a hen’s egg, said unsteadily as it wobbled up into the air and away from Kindness and the other Elements, before settling unsteadily onto Twilight’s horn, growing tendrils of gemstone to hold itself in place. “Celestia and Luna alike both have seen what happens when somebeing tries to fuse two or more entities together, and it’s not pretty even when it doesn’t work. So has the Mother of Stones. At worst, you’re looking at a week or two with the Mother of Stones looming over your shoulder while she consumes our two rogue siblings. At best … Generosity and Magic will stop being hateful little gits and come out under their own power and take their punishment like proper Stones.”

“Consumes?” Twilight whinnied in shock, stopping mid-stalking of her former teacher to stare cross-eyed at the living gemstone that had perched on her horn, while Celestia merely sighed and stopped trying to dance away from her outraged former pupil.

“There are very … hard and fast rules for Elementals who start messing with Organics, Pillar. And those laws become exceedingly harsh when it comes to maturing Immortals and attempting to manipulate the Eternal Conflict using said Immortals.” Loyalty, rising into the air as a fist-shaped lump of blue boulder-opal, shot through with splotches of red, white and pale yellow, with long tendrils hanging from underneath that were gently carrying Kindness, still in it’s equine form, back onto ‘her’ hooves. “If Generosity and Magic willingly come out and accept their fate, they’ll merely be stripped of their mantles, placed in confinement for a few millennia and then released to go … well, go sulk somewhere. After interfering in something this big, after so many Stones competed for the honor of becoming an Element? Their betrayal will never be forgotten, or forgiven by those whom they beat to become an Element in the first place, and they’re likely to spend the rest of their Cycles being shunned and ostracized by the rest of the Stones and targeted by the other types of Elementals almost constantly.”

“And if they try to hang on to their little plans and keep interfering with your Ascension, Twilight? The Mother of Stones has a mandate to protect developing Immortals, and she’ll simply take back what she gave in the first place. Life. Sentience. Independence. The rogue Elements will simply be reabsorbed and crushed under the massive weight of the Mother’s own personality before they can do you, or any other Organic, any further harm.” Honesty added in a blunt, heated tone.

“Tha’s horrifyin’. Can’t she jus’ … stick ‘em in a prison or somethin’?” Applejack asked in a weak, sickly tone as she dragged herself up to a wall and used it to prop herself up into a semblance of being upright.

“We’re Elementals, my dear. We’re nearly Immortal ourselves, capable of shape-changing into whatever form we want, we need neither sleep nor food and every Elemental can move through their, well, element like a fish swims through the water. There’s no prison in this world that can hold an Elemental except a larger, more powerful Elemental.” Kindness, getting ‘her’ hooves under her, began wandering around the room and helping the assembled ponies back onto their own hooves, while Loyalty zipped around the room like a rainbow of annoyance, sending sparks of chromatic hue scattering through the air in it’s wake. “If they are willing to submit to justice and surrender their ability to channel the gifts the Powers gave them, they’ll simply be monitored until the Mother of Stones can confirm our siblings will not meddle with Mortals or Immortals again. If they don’t, then they are too dangerous to be left alive and must be destroyed so the gifts of Magic and Generosity can be given to new Elementals. There are no other options available to anyone with crimes of such magnitude, against such important beings, much as I wish otherwise.”

“And that is why I want you all in Twilight’s tower until the Mother of Stones arrives. It is heavily shielded, both by Twilight herself and my own efforts after she moved out and the Muckraker, Murdock and Stump reporters became entirely too bold for their own good.” The Solar Princess risked coming close enough to Twilight to slip a wing around her frazzled ex-student. Twilight jumped, shivered … then leaned into the contact with a look of anguish on her face as Honesty patted her cheek with a gem-like tendril. “Neither Magic nor Generosity would have any idea of the root-spells Twilight placed in her private quarters and, with the other Elements holding them down, will be unable to effectively pick apart Twilight’s spellwork in the space of a day. And my own enchantments are … considerably more potent, if less specialized than Twilight’s work. Magic and Generosity might be able to remember my favourite root-spells for such wardings, but again, with the other Elements holding them down and with myself wearing so much of my Regalia …”

“I will also be in attendance, should anybeing be concerned. Besides … I would like to have witnesses in place as I ask my sister what the bucking tartarus were you thinking when you allowed Chrysalis, of all beings, to surrender and walk right back into Canterlot? And why was I informed by the morning paper and not my co-ruler?”

“Whatever happened to letting the Princess having a few minutes to collect her thoughts?” The cast-wearing Rarity tittered, to which Luna poked out her tongue and then turned her focus back to her sister, who had gone noticeably pale under her white coat, possibly from the realization there were two pissed-off Alicorns aimed squarely at her, possibly from the sudden death-grip Twilight had unleashed on her former teacher’s foreleg.

“She’s had a few minutes, now it’s the time to mare up and take her lumps.”

“Ugh, it’s like watchin’ the Crusaders have a scrap.” Applejack muttered loudly as a sweating Celestia tried to defuse the situation, only to have Luna grab her other foreleg and forcibly drag the Solar Princess into the nearest corner of the room. “At least we can all rest easy, knowin’ that Spike’s got things well in hand.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spike heaved for breath, his newly enlarged body coated with sweat, fur and other things as he braced Sweetie Belle for her next turn on the Spike Special, with a cross-eyed and limp Applebloom being dragged out of the way by a weak-legged Scootaloo.

Lifting her tail out of the way as much to get a good look to burn into his mind’s eye for decades to come as to get some time to catch his breath and try to think about non-sexual things to last after ‘Bloom ‘finished’ halfway through their set, Spike got his first good look at the underside of a mare’s tail rather than the frenzied ravaging he and the girls had been giving to each other all morning, and a wicked, evil thought came to mind.

“S-spike, don’t stare, it’s embarrassing!” Sweetie whispered, blushing adorably … and then squeaked, her eyes bulging as the pointed, wet tip of the Spike Special started to travel roads less travelled. “SPIKE! Wait, that’s the wrong hole!”

“THE HELL IT IS!” The now overly-cocky, in every way that counted, young Drake quipped back as he took a firmer grip on the adorable little stub of a tail from which Sweetie’s long, flowing tail sprung, and …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fluttershy wasn’t entirely sure that Celestia was used to being on the receiving end of a lecture in stereo, especially not from her younger sister and favourite student. At least, judging from the nervous ear-twitching and the occasional drum of a hind-hoof on the marble floor as the Solar Princess was seated on the floor, in the corner, in a canine sitting position as Twilight and Luna took turns yelling at her.

Fluttershy didn’t want to assume, after all.

Or maybe it was the fact that the Elements were a bodylength behind Luna and Twilight, or at least Kindness was. Loyalty was zipping around Celestia’s head, shedding sparks every other zip and spin, while Honesty had kept it’s perch and poking all three of the Alicorns with a crystal tendril, and Kindness …

Fluttershy wasn’t exactly sure what she was supposed to make of Kindness. The knowledge the Element had been a part of her for so many years, but had been a mute and un-noticed observer of some of the best, and worst, parts of Fluttershy’s life was unnerving. Unfortunately, they’d not had a chance to talk in all the chaos, but Fluttershy had several questions and found herself more focused on building up her reserves of courage to ask Kindness some rather personal questions.

The fact that Kindness had apparently patterned some of her physical aspects on Fluttershy herself was both concerning and flattering … although the gentle Pegasus was fairly certain her butt was not that round and shapely, and her legs were not that long.

Fairly certain …

…

Maybe nopony would notice if she ducked away quietly for a minute or two to find a mirror?

Or maybe she could ask Applejack for her opinion? They had certainly gotten close enough over the past few days, and unlike Zecora, Fluttershy was fairly certain asking Applejack such questions wouldn’t involve losing a few hours in testing some of the overflow of stock from the Glorious Hole store. And limping afterwards.

She’d had quite enough of the limping for a few days.

Thoughts of what she might be asking Applejack for, and perhaps what she might ask Applejack and Zecora at the same time, were disrupted as Celestia fairly bolted from the room in a mad panic. Apparently Fluttershy had been imagining her hypothetical question-time with her two good friends a bit longer than she’d intended …

“I’ll get them! I’ll get them right now and show you why!” Celestia called over her shoulder in a panicked tone, and was responded to with a match pair of outraged whinnies from her fellow Princesses before they were tackled by the Elements not currently occupying Rarity’s mane as a hair-ornament.

Fluttershy blinked as she watched Kindness wrestle Luna to the floor and put her in a reverse-pretzel hold, while Loyalty and Honesty proceeded to hog-tie an outraged Twilight with their tendrils. She wished she’d been paying more attention to their conversation, but judging from the relaxed stances of the sole Royal Guard in the room, and the way the Thestrals were either chuckling into their leathery wings or were rolling their eyes, whatever had sent Celestia bolting from the room like a startled rabbit hadn’t been too serious.

“YES, GO FETCH YOUR LITTLE CHANGELING PETS! I AM JUST DYING TO HEAR THE EXCUSES FOR ALL HER CRIMES STRAIGHT FROM THE HORSE’S MOUTH, OH SISTER MINE!” Luna roared back in her full Canterlot Voice, nearly sending Kindness, Twilight and the other two Elements flying across the room due to unfortunate proximity to the Lunar Princess’s head.

Oh … oh dear.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dear, talk to me. None of the Crystal Guard will stay in the same room as me without a direct order, and when they do, none of them will make eye-contact with me.” Cadence huffed as her husband, her wonderful, loyal, caring, attentive husband … stared into the corner of the carriage.

No, scratch that, he was sitting on the padden bench with his entire body facing into the corner. It would have been adorably cat-like if Cadence wasn’t certain he was doing it to avoid her.

“Don’t want to.” Came the muffled reply.

“Is this about knocking you into the wall?”

Silence.

“The … Nightmare Shipper?”

A snort, either of annoyance or amusement, she couldn’t tell, but Shining just shook his head a few times and then went back to staring into the corner.

“Look, you have to talk to me eventually. We’re married, we run a kingdom together, we share a toothbrush.” The pink Princess of Love huffed and began prodding Shining Armor just above the base of his tail with a wing.

Prod.

Prod prod prod.

Prod prod prod poke.

Prod poke prod jab poke prod.

“If we talk, will you stop trying to bore a hole into my spine?” Shining Armor finally managed to grunt in annoyance as Cadence’s endless assault on the soft spot just above the base of his tail finally granted her an audience.

“Honey, I know I went overboard with Twilie and Auntie Luna, but … I have to know, you know? It’s my Domain, my Aspect, and I’m also personally invested in Twilight, just as much as you are.” Putting her best wheedling tone into effect, Cadence leaned in and snuggled against Shining’s back, smiling to herself as she felt her stallion tense up, resist … and then relax.

“I know, but you didn’t have to talk to them afterwards, Cadie. You traumatized them, our little Twilie, your aunt Luna. They’re only just learning they can trust and lean on each other, and to have us just barge in and demand answers without even thinking about how delicate their feelings might be for each other … I suppose we’re lucky we-errk!” Shining’s softly-spoken response was broken as Cadence’s front hooves, wings and magic all grabbed his head and forcefully dragged him around to stare right into her eyes.

Large, bulging eyes with tiny pinpricks for pupils.

Eyes that gleamed with excitement beyond that of mortal ken.

“Luna? Twilight? Feelings for each other?” Hyperventilating, Cadence half-levitated, half-dragged Shining out of the corner and held him up in the air, muzzle to muzzle, as she felt her mouth split into a broad, almost too-broad grin. “Shining, the only things Twilight and auntie Luna told me was that they were swapping spit because Luna went into estrus at a weird time and they were dealing with some sort of crazy magical resonance. Honey … tell me everything.”

“THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!” Shining protested loudly as the train rattled its way back towards Canterlot.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Braeburn wasn’t entirely certain what he could do in this situation. What he did know was that it was only Stronghoof’s leg entwined with his own, and her greater strength, that kept him from charging into the fray, but what could he even do in this situation?

Elder Blossom’s children had surrounded their matriarch. And their children. And their children. And the employees and their children. All the while Blossom, her faded olive-green coat and golden mane and tail standing out strongly in the sea of more earthy tones, rolled her eyes and waited for the ruckus to stop.

Sheriff Silverstar was, as usual, utterly useless and simply stood back and watched it all with a stern look, chewing on his stalk of hay and periodically reaching up with a hoof to adjust his hat to a new angle, as Malted Milk, the owner of the local saloon and the bane of Braeburn’s existence, had rallied his regulars to harass the Orchid Clan en-mass. No doubt he’d seen the matriarch heading to the train station the day before and would have leaned on his regulars to learn what was going on, and had probably intended to show up when she came into town next to try and score some emotional hits on a easy target.

Except all sixty of the Orchid Clan had turned up along with their luggage, and then a good hundred or so of the employees had shown up to send the Orchids off, so a dozen drunks and their alcohol-pimp were facing off against not an old crone and a few of her grand-children, but a mob of individuals who intensely disliked every single member of said posse.

And unfortunately, Malted Milk’s posse were armed. It might have only been with civilian-grade revolvers and rifles, loaded with rock-salt rounds, but at close range, that kind of ammunition could still cause painful injuries. And it was only the fact that Appleloosa’s infamously lazy Sheriff was watching that was keeping those weapons holstered, since with so many witnesses, even Silverstar’s legendary incompetence wouldn’t be enough to save Malted Milk and his posse from the full force of the law.

“Braeburn, no, you will be shot.” Little Stronghoof hissed, tugging Braeburn back to her side as the erstwhile ‘acting mayor’ tried to pull away to get in-between the two groups.

“They only have rocksalt rounds. If they have worse, even Silverstar will have to actually do something. Besides, Orchid Blossom has my letter, and if she doesn’t get to Canterlot to deliver it, then this will just keep happening over and over again.”

“And if they have actual bullets? Would you leave me alone, so soon after we gained my father’s approval for our courtship? Many of those ponies have dragged their hooves at every step when it comes to making Appleoosa a home for all beings, not just ponies.” Little Stronghoof’s warm coat pressed into his own, a solid and pleasant reminder of all the changes that had come once Applejack and her friends had come to his small country town and torn the blinkers from everyone’s eyes. “There are many Orchids, and there is only one of you. Silverstar is worthless as a sheriff, and it may be up to us to provide witness to your Royal Guards if weapons are drawn.”

It grated, but the town’s defacto ‘mayor’ didn’t really have a counter-argument. But if Elder Blossom didn’t get on that train, however, then Appleoosa would remain trapped in this vicious cycle between those who were trying to embrace harmony with their neighbours, and those who simply wanted to expand the Apple Clan’s influence, and the wrong kind of influence at that! And sooner or later, if the latter were allowed to continue on unopposed, the Buffalo, Donkey and Diamond Dog communities would turn against all Ponykind in the region, and that would turn into a full-blown race-war.

“You’re right, Stronghoof. But we do have to be the voice of reason here.” Braeburn turned and nuzzled Stronghoof, the young Bison blushing at the unexpectedly public display of affection, before the young mayor turned his attention back to the tense standoff … and the one Pony who could stop it, but didn’t. “Sheriff Silverstar! I wasn’t aware citizens of Equestria were allowed to harass each other like this! Unless I’m mistaken, you’re not allowed to be publicly armed except in times on war, so why are you allowing Malted Milk and his gang to wander around town and harass innocent townsfolk like this?”

Silverstar’s head fairly whipped around to stare at Braeburn, his normally stoic and stern features melting into a fairly vicious scowl as several of the Ponies, Buffalo and Diamond Dogs who had come to watch the show-down all began whispering and nodding. Malted Milk looking like he’d just bitten into a ripe cow-pie, and the Orchid Clan had started to smirk.

“Indeed! The ambassadors of your Princesses promised that Buffalo would not be made second-class citizens in their own lands, yet many of these Ponies you will not control refuse to trade with us, or set up barricades to stop our tribes from accessing our traditional stampeding grounds!” Little Stronghoof stepped forwards to stand alongside Braeburn, the young Brave unflinching as several of Malted Milk’s posse spat in her direction. “Do you answer to Malted Milk’s coin, or the laws that your Princesses uphold?”

“Ah serve the laws o’ Equestria, Buffalo, an’ right now ain’t nothin’ wrong with what Malted Milk’s doin’ here.” The sheriff spat back, turning to glare directly at the mis-matched lovers, tilting his hat back with a steel-shod hoof before the limb moved back to his belt … and the revolver that hung there. “Those ‘barricades’ are called ‘fences’, an’ civilised folk use ‘em to say where their land stops an’ another’s begins.”

“Our agreement with the Buffalo Tribes was that there would be no fences that cut off their stampeding grounds, and you know it, Silverstar.” Braeburn began before the sheriff cut him off.

“Sheriff Silverstar to you, sellout.” The sheriff snarled, taking a step forwards, away from the tense standoff and towards Braeburn, before a rotten apple was thrown at him, missing entirely but causing the armed Pony to stop and rear back a step at the ‘attack’.

“Maybe not a sheriff for much longer, Silverstar, if you’re unwilling to do your job.”

“The Sun and Moon shine on all beings, not just Ponies! For shame, Silverstar, for shame!”

“How many times do we have to go through this mess? We made peace with the Buffalo, we’ve got our orchards and they have their stampeding grounds and our town has never been better off, why are you helping the Ponies who want things to go back to the bad old days?”

“Why the heck aren’t you pulling Malted Milk off the Blossoms? This is extortion! He just wants their quarry!”

“Princesses promised good Ponies would trade with Pack, with Herds, why sheriff not listen to Princesses?”

Up and down the street, bystanders began to call out, and more rotten apples, and heads of lettuce and other, less savoury projectiles began to fill the air, aimed at Silverstar, at Malted Milk and his posse, and in moments as the rancid missiles began to hit their targets, the posse began to splinter and break up.

This is it! We’re finally seeing the bad seeds getting their comeuppance, Appleloosa will… Braeburn’s smile, that warm feeling in his chest as he watched the beings of his town, beings of many races and ways of life come together to defend their own, shattered as Silverstar pulled out his revolver, took aim, and fired.

The street was silent as the sheriff pulled the gun to his muzzle, blew the stream of smoke away and glared hard at Braeburn before sheathing the weapon.

“Y’all should remember that it was Apple Clan bits that paid for this town out here. Apple Clan bits that brought the lumber to build the homes, the nails to hold it all together, the food to keep us fed an’ healthy ‘fore the orchards got producin’.” The sheriff’s words oozed contempt as the townsbeings all eyed the bullet-hole in the building … directly over Braeburn’s head. “Might be that y’all forgot that the Apple Clan built this town, not the Princesses, an’ definitely not your fancy lil’ cousin wit’ her fancy lil magic gemstone. So, far as I’m concerned, it’s an Apple town, an’ Earth Pony Town, till the Princesses decide to put in the same investment that Matriarch Turnover did, an’ you’d all best be rememberin’ that.”

Braeburn lost track of time. All he could remember after that was warm bodies surrounding him, carrying him into one of the general stores, and the whine of the locomotive’s steam engine disappearing into the distance. Shame gripped Braeburn’s heart and squeezed cruelly, taunting the young stallion with the fact that he could freeze up so easily, as Little Stronghoof held him close and many of the employees of the Orchid’s quarry milled about, discussing in low tones the scene from before and …

“Wait, what happened? The sheriff has closed the post-office?” The young mayor managed to croak out as a snatch of conversation managed to pierce the fuge of shock and dismay.

“Yeah, no messages out of town until the ‘civil disturbance’ has ended. Apparently having some of the townsfolk throwing rotten vegetables at the sheriff classifies as ‘civil disobedience’, at least according to Silverstar. And he’s refusing to say when he’ll allow the post-office to open again.” A burly mare laughed bitterly as she slapped a pile of letters against the counter, while next to her a pug-faced Diamond Dog whined nervously, clutching a brown paper parcel to his chest protectively.

“Stronghoof, the letter … did the Orchids get their matriarch onto the train in time?” The blonde-coated stallion whispered to his beau, who nodded and leaned in again to nuzzle him.

“All of the Orchids got on the train, and most of the employees went back to the quarry to keep it running … and guard it against Malted Milk. And the sher … Silverstar.” The young Buffalo Brave whispered back into Braeburn’s ear. “We should thank our Ancestors that Elder Blossom convinced you to let her take the letter to Canterlot after all, rather than send it to your cousin to spare Blossom from having to play courier at her age. A sheriff’s authority might be enough to cover opening fire at the mayor during a ‘civil disturbance’, or even to close the post-office indefinitely, but I doubt Silverstar could order a train to be halted without something more … impressive than being hit by rotten apples as an excuse.”

“That isn’t what I’m concerned about, Stronghoof! It takes three days for the train to reach Ponyville, and another half a day to reach Canterlot! It could take several days for Elder Blossom to get an audience, and even longer for the Thrones to investigate Appleloosa!” Braeburn’s hoof snuck out and placed itself on Little Stronghoof’s cheek, pushing the Buffalo’s head down to rest against his, forehead to forehead. “Silverstar’s just openly declared himself on the side of the Ponies who’d undo every step we’ve made to make Appleloosa our town, rather than just an Apple town, and Stronghoof? All the Ponies who want to go back to the bad old days have most of the guns.”

In the hushed confines of the general store, as beings of many races all stared at Braeburn with horrified or crushed expressions, the mayor found while he might not have the courage to face a bullet … he did have the courage to face his friends.

“The sheriff’s authority only extends to the town and the surrounding region, and if he’s really determined to cut us off from the rest of the world by closing down the post-office, then there’s no telling how far he’ll be willing to go if we remain in town and still refuse to bow to his perversions of the law.” Standing slowly to his feet, and then climbing onto the counter, Braeburn turned to look at his townsfolk, his people. “I want all of you to spread the word, to anypony in town that’s on our side: Appleloosa isn’t safe, not until the Royal Guards show up and remove Silverstar from power. Warn anybody who isn’t a Pony that the sheriff isn’t on their side anymore. We’ll head for the Orchid’s quarry, take only what you’ll need for a long trip of roughing it, food, water, blankets and medicine, and we’ll try to evacuate as many of the real Appleloosians out of town before the sheriff can try to find a law that allows him to shoot beings trying to leave town.”

“How … long could this take, Braeburn? I run a stall, I have a small farm close to town, if I leave, if I’m not tending to my crops …” A small Donkey stammered, rubbing at a foreleg with a hoof as large, fearful eyes looked up at Braeburn.

“Best guess I can give everybeing here is maybe a month at least, an’ that’s assumin’ the Thrones don’t move on the spot. I can’t see Elder Blossom or the rest of the Orchid Clan being willing to leave us hanging, not having heard Silverstar themselves. But Canterlot’s … messy. Lots of Nobles gummin’ up the Princesses’ works, lots of greedy merchants needin’ to be brought to heel to pay their taxes and tithes.” The young mayor responded in his most confident tone as several beings around the store sagged or wore angry expressions. “I’m hoping that the Princesses will send a platoon to take Silverstar and Malted Milk down and start policing our town, but there’s a lot of Guards being sent to the Gryphonia border these days, so we might have to hope the Princesses will send Applejack and her friends back. A bit of their Elements an’ friendship magic could make all the difference.”

“Let’s get movin’, folks. Appleloosa needs us to save her from Silverstar and Malted Milk, and the sooner we get started, the sooner our families will be safe out at the quarry.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight scowled at the door and wondered if the Royal Guards were actually worth their pay-checks. The Elements had … well, not betrayed her, but had stopped Twilight and Luna from going after Princess Celestia directly and the Royal Guards had then stepped in-front of the doors and pleaded with the remaining two Princesses to stand their ground and wait for the Elder Princess to return.

“So … theories.” The dishevelled purple princess said out loud, silencing the muted conversations behind her. “Princess Celestia is converted to the Changeling Queen’s will and we’ll have to disable her without the power of the Elements of Harmony. Princess Celestia isn’t converted, but this is still some sort of convoluted plot by the Changelings and we’re going to have to prove it despite nobody believing me ... us, just like with Cadence and Shining’s wedding.”

Twilight didn’t have to look behind her to know several Ponies in the room were wincing at that reminder.

“Third option … Princess Celestia is telling the truth, Queen Chrysalis has honestly come to surrender, and there is yet another unspeakable threat bearing down on us all, except this time, nopony honestly knew about it before-hoof, so that will be … refreshing.”

There was silence for a few moments before Applejack spoke up.

“Honestly speakin’, Twi, ahm not entirely sure which o’ those options are worse. Ah mean, the first one’s bad enough, an’ the second one ain’t much better, but the third?” The farm-mare’s deep voice and warm tones were tinged with alarm. “Ain’t quite sure we’re ready to face somethin’ that’d send as many things fleein’ as a whole Hive o’ Changelings. The Elements ain’t available an’ the Guards ain’t really … err …”

“You’re kiiiiiiiiiiinda useless.” Rainbow ‘helpfully’ added, and the number of angry snorts around the room told Twilight all she needed to about how the Night and Day Guards took that comment.

“Ah was gonna say not used to fightin’ somethin’ meaner than another Pony havin’ a bad day, but yeah, that’s true too, Dashie. Ah mean, the Princess kept on sendin’ six civilian mares out to do the work, an’ not her own soldiers. That ain’t exactly a glowin’ recommendation on y’all.”

“In their defence, if a member of the Royal Guard so much as hip-checks a civilian without sufficient cause, they can be sent back to basic training until such time as the Royal Comission decides they’ve learned their lesson, if not dismissed from the Guard dishonorably.” Luna interrupted, leaving Twilight’s side to interpose herself between Rainbow Dash and the Day and Night Guards. “Once open warfare is declared, Lady Dash, Lady Jack, you might find your views on the Royal Guard undergoing drastic changes. My sister and the Generals of her armies have spent many centuries and untold amounts of bits and diplomacy making Equestria’s armies as friendly and welcoming as possible, so that if we do need to go to the defence or aid of another nation, our soldiers are welcomed as friends and allies, not another potential enemy.”

“And lest we forget, Royal Guards have kept the border with the United States of Gryphonia stable and prevented petty warlords from expanding into our territory for centuries. This had not been a bloodless endeavour, and I will ask you all to remember that. Whatever issues we have with my sister and her machinations, please do not assume incompetence amongst the Royal Guard is common, nor forget how much you all have been aided by the Elements subtly reinforcing your natural abilities over the course of your adventures.”

Twilight finally broke her glaring contest with the mirror-finish on the door to gaze at Luna, a small smile forcing its way onto her face as she watched her mare-friend stand up for the Royal Guard. With her wings held slightly out and away from her body, the Lunar Princess looked commanding without threatening.

“Hey, I am 120% cooler all on my own! I did not need magic to get into the Wonderbolts!” Rainbow snapped back, crossing her free foreleg over the one in a cast and glared down at Luna.

“Actually, my little feather-duster, you did.” Loyalty chimed in, the floating gemstone having taken the form of an eight-sided star, shaped like two cubes of boulder-opal super-imposed over each other. “In your case, however, physical prowess was never the problem, but squashing down your ego and cultivating some self-awareness and humility was my biggest issue.”

“… What?” Rainbow grunted in the near-silence, broken only by the soft groans of Kindness and Laughter, and the small, solid thump noises of Honesty floating over to the wall and banging it’s largest facet against the solid surface.

“Loyalty, why on Equis did you say it like that?” Floating up from Rarity’s mane, and taking a long strand of the fashionista’s mane with it, Laughter bobbed up into the air and twirled in the sunlight. “Uh, Bearers, please don’t misunderstand. We can’t change your personalities, we can only encourage the growth of your harmonious qualities. You’re no less Rainbow Dash than you were before you became a Bearer, you’re just … uhm, what’s the term I am looking for here?”

“Laughter and Loyalty means you’re simply a more virtuous Pony now. You’re more confident without needing to think you’re above others, you’re willing to consider other options before just using your own strength, in summation, you are everything a Pony should be.” Honestly bobbed over to where Loyalty was hovering in the air, grew a long, segmented tentacle of ametrine crystal and thwapped it’s fellow Element, making the large chunk of boulder-opal spin wildly in the air. “If you honestly didn’t want the cultivations we were performing on yourselves, you’d subconscious supress them and they would only really ‘appear’ during moments of extreme stress or pressure, much like what happened to Lady Rarity and Generosity’s perversion of it’s duties.”

There was silence for a few minutes as everypony tried to digest that little nugget of information.

“Okay, look, this isn’t solving anything, so let’s table the whole mind-fiddling angle until after Princess Celestia comes back with her ‘proof’, I’ll blast her and it with my Anti-Changeling wards and if it does turn our we’re betrayed, the Royal Guards get to prove their paychecks aren’t in vain.” Twilight grunted, stomping into the middle of the roof and using her magic to push Rainbow down onto the ground and away from the Royal Guards, both parties still looking profoundly irritated. “And if the wards do nothing, then it means the Princess is telling the truth, the Changelings are honestly looking for peace and that’s one less nightmare we have to deal with.”

“Yeah, deal. Ah ain’t ready fer that topic yet.”

“Good enough for me, darlings.”

“Sounds super-duper good to me!”

“Uhm, I’d like that, if it’s okay?”

The rest of the Bearers turned to Rainbow Dash, who huffed, blew a bang of multicolored mane out of her face and grump a “Fine!” at them.

“I am glad you have all reached a consensus, because I can hear my sister galloping back to this room, and I can feel her magic levitating something.” The Princess of the Night stepped around to Twilight’s side and wrapped a wing around her smaller Alicorn marefriend. “So … if we are going to do this, Twilight stands with me and casts her spell. I will shield her. The Elements and the Royal Guards will shield the Bearers. And all things going well … we’ll get back to yelling at Celestia in the next five minutes.”

“Deal.” Twilight grunted as the room rapidly re-arranged itself, with Royal Guards dragging or carrying furniture to form barricades between the door and the Bearers, and the Elements themselves arraying themselves around Twilight and Luna.

After several moments, and a dim sensation of Heat and Power growing closer and closer to them, which Twilight chalked up to this strange ability to sense things beyond what normal Mortals could that her blasted Ascension was forcing on her, Twilight began preparing her private Anti-Changeling spells, wards that should strip the illusions from their hides or cause the magical residue of their transformations to become visible to the naked eye, the door slammed open and a visibly-panicking Celestia staggered into the room … with a frazzled-looking Queen Chrysalis, wrapped in a thick blanket and rag-dolling through the air in a cloud of the Princess’s magic.

Without meaning to, Twilight poured far more power into her wards than she intended, bathing the Princess and the Changeling Queen in a cone of reddish-pink energy. And apart from potentially blinding everypony in said cone… nothing.

Not a single charm or compulsion that tied to the Changeling Queen or an external source could be seen. That didn’t mean there wasn’t anything, but as Twilight focused on her spell, there didn’t seem to be anything concrete to suggest the Changelings had managed to subvert or replace the Princess of the Sun.

“Yep, tha’s the bug.” Applejack muttered darkly from behind Twilight, the muscular farm-pony waiting for the call to action with barely-controlled nervousness.

“Oh my goodness, she’s so … oh dear, oh dear.” Fluttershy whimpered, held back from surging up to the Changeling Queen by the combined efforts of Kindness and three Royal Guards

“Simply awful, how can she still be alive after looking like …” Holding onto each other, Rarity and Pinky stared at the Changeling Queen, and even Twilight found herself wincing at the awful state of her old enemy, the horrible cracks in her chitinous shell and the thinness to her already slender frame lending the Changeling Queen a sense of fragility that seemed so odd after all their interactions.

“C’mon, it’s gotta be a trick, she can change shapes, she can probably pretend to look half-squashed too!” Rainbow spluttered in protest, but even the trainee-Wonderbolt seemed subdued by the state of the Changeling Queen.

“Either blast me or turn off your damn horn.” The Changeling Queen hissed in a parched croak of words, throwing a fragile, be-holded limb over her face and flaking sections of chitin in the process. “I am in too much pain, too tired, and too over all of this to care, but at the very least aim higher. I don’t want the babies to be hurt.”

“Ba …” Twilight spluttered, her spell trailing off as shock overtook her. “Babies?”

As a rapidly-blinking Celestia tottered on her hooves and the Changeling Queen wobbled lower, three Ponies surged forwards to essentially frisk the Changeling Queen. Two of which didn’t surprise Twilight in the slightest, but the third did.

Fluttershy was, of course, the first at the Changeling Queen’s side, pulling aside the blanket at great speed but in a manner that was also surprisingly gentle, revealing two tiiiiiny little black foals and a white one, while Applejack was perhaps a half second behind her, the two of them lifting a white and a black foal between them, while Luna’s hooves carefully gathered up the remaining child and, cooing softly, transferred the sleepy baby into the feathery cocoon of the Princess of the Night’s wings.

Okay. So. My Marefriend is apparently ga-ga for babies. That’s … going to be something to process later. Feeling another treacherous shift in her mental landscape as her subconscious tried to fathom how this new revelation was going to affect her fragile relationship with Luna, Twilight tottered over to Luna’s back and plastered herself over her marefriend’s back to stare at the Changeling spawn.

Okay, it was adorable. So maybe Luna just liked small, cute things …

“Oh my gosh, we’ve never known what Changelings look like in their various life-cycles! We always assumed it was insectile, but if they give live-birth, then that means they’re more mammalian than we thought!” Bringing her muzzle down closer to the child, Twilight’s nostrils flared, taking in the scent as her eyes roamed over the adorable little thing. It didn’t smell like the Cake family’s twins, a slightly more acidic scent clung to the little black female than was normal for a member of the equine species, but there was an undeniable warmth to the filly than an insect’s grub would possess. There was also something so strangely familiar about the child that immediately made Twilight want to just steal the adorable little thing out of her marefriend’s wings and cuddle it directly.

All across the room, mares and stallions alike squealed and cooed as they fawned over the offspring of the Changeling Queen, and when it came for Twilight’s long-belated turn to hold the little black foal, who snuggled in against Twilight’s body the instant the newest Alicorn brought the child close to her and began to peep happily, it was only after her gaze automatically turned to Princess Celestia, in a long-ingrained habit of seeking some sign of tactic approval for an action she wasn’t used to performing, that she witnesses the Princess of the Sun and the Changeling Queen whispering to each other on the couch.

Celestia looked … chagrined, while Chrysalis looked irrirated. And then her gaze travelled to Luna and Twilight herself, and an evil grin split her chitinous face.

“So … exactly how long have Luna and Twilight been going at it like bunnies in the spring-time?”

Twilight squeaked and nearly dropped the foal in her hooves, while Luna coughed and sagged against Twilight’s back, nearly squashing her. All across the room, the Bearers and the Guards broke out into flustered spluttering or outright laughter, and the foals all began to giggle and coo as well, although on a conscious level, Twilight knew they were only reacting to the amusement of the adults, and not her personal embarrassment.

It still didn't make the sting of humiliation and embarrassment any less present.

“Wow, Twi, ah think she’s gotcha number.” Applejack snorted, trying vainly to push the broad rim of her hat back from the clumsily-pawing hooves of the foal in her arms, while Pinkie was busy trying to pat the back of Rarity through her cast, where the white Fashionista had broken into a coughing fit as laughter had causes some spit to go down the wrong pipe.

At the very least, Rainbow wasn’t laughing at her, she was just glaring daggers at the Changeling Queen.

At least I have one friend who doesn’t think my relationship with Luna is something to laugh at. I mean, I know they’re supportive but we haven’t actually … talked … about me dating somepony, especially a Princess like Luna. Hmmm. Twilight frowned at the thought that maybe her friends would think less of her for dating somepony of the same gender. Rainbow made no bones about her broad ‘strike zone’ for dating, Fluttershy had busted herself wide out into the open with the fact Applejack, Zecora and herself had had a raging lesbian escapade, Rarity was a wild-card since Twilight was fairly certain the mare was vigorously straight, and Pinkie …

There were few things in the world Twilight did not want to know, and what Pinkie found sexually attractive was fairly high up that list.

So flustered at being outed so bluntly by an old enemy, Twilight had lost track of the room, totally focused on not dropping the foal in her hooves and trying to shield her heavily-blushing face from sight behind her wings, and as such was caught unprepared for what happened next.

“I beg your pardon?” Chrysalis snapped loudly, causing every head in the room to swivel back from the popular game of Twilight-baiting to the metaphorical elephant in the room.

“Twilight Sparkle has the brightest, sharpest mind of her generation, and can turn that intellect to any task with ease.” Sounding far more confident than the frazzled mess who had burst into the room only a few minutes ago with the bed-ridden Changeling Queen in tow, Celestia looked almost smug as her gaze travelled from Chrysalis to Twilight and back again. “Who better to defend you in the Courts and ease the integration of every Changeling Hive into Equestrian society than the greatest hero in living memory? Who better to champion the befriending of the Changelings than the Princess of Friendship herself?”

Twilight watched Chrysalis’s eyes go wide, her throat bob with a swallowing motion … and then the Changeling’s eyes rolled into the back of her head and fainted dead away onto the couch.

“…WHAT?” Twilight hissed, about to shout at the Princess before remembering she had two hoof-fuls of innocent, fragile life to deal with.

“I’m not saying now, Twilight, but your popularity with the common folk of the kingdom has never been higher. If not you, then who? If the Princess of Friendship is unwilling to extend a hoof to those seeking our forgiveness, then who will?” Princess Celestia replied calmly, levitating Chrysalis into a less spine-defying position as the room filled with shocked whispers again.

“You think I’m going to put myself out into the spotlight, when I have all of your enemies baying for blood, when I’m barely able to have a moment of privacy and my own life is completely out of control, so I can save Chrysalis?” The purple alicorn’s words were laced with venom as she spat them out, and Twilight’s mind both quailed and approved as she watched the smile on Princess Celestia’s face fade into a sad frown.

“No, Twilight, I hoped you’ll do it for her.” A golden glow from below made Twilight’s gaze drop, to where a tendril of Celestia’s sun-magic had manifested to push a lock of pale blue-green mane out of the foal’s eyes, those same perfectly blue eyes that stared back up at Twilight with innocent confusion at how angry the one who held her had become.

“… That’s not fair.” Twilight’s voice was far softer when she spoke next, and she didn’t lift her gaze from the Changeling foal in her hooves.

“Were life fair, Twilight, the world would not need either of us.” Twilight’s word became white and soft as Celestia got up and wrapped both Twilight and the foal in her wings, bringing the younger Alicorn’s head to rest against Celestia’s side. “I cannot force you to do this, we will be equals soon enough and I need you to stand as the equal of Luna and myself, to make sure the mistakes of the past, my mistakes, are not repeated in the future, but if not you, who? I will say it again, if not the Princess of Friendship, who else can heal the rifts between the people of this world?”

“I did not want this for you, Twilight. I wanted you to make friends, to have a life outside of this gilded prison of a city, for you to fall in love, have children, to grow old gracefully after living a life full of adventure and experience. To become a Princess, and all that that entails, was never what I wanted for you, but it seems fate has other plans for the both of us.” The white wing pressed Twilight into Celestia’s side tighter … and then relaxed, merely shielding Twilight from the rest of the room now. “You wanted to know everything, and so you shall, I swear on my Sun and my Throne. But for now, I must make sure you can survive what comes next with your body, mind and soul intact, and for that...”

Twilight’s eyes closed as those words, in a tone so familiar and comforting, tore at her heart like a Gryphon’s claws, and she shuddered as the final stroke came so softly.

“For that, I need you to trust me, now more than ever.”

Chapter 80

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Chapter 1

Author's Note

Hello all, Giant_Neckbeard attempting my very first MLP:FIM Fanfiction, centered around two of my favourite characters, Twilight Sparkle and Princess Luna.

The story is going to be touching on some, well, touchy subjects, pun not intended, such as straight ponies falling in love with their own gender, bastard children, religious intolerance, Molestia and nations going to war.

I'm looking for proof-readers, editors and generally anyone who has five minutes to rub together, quickly go over my stuff and say "That's stupid, that's retarded, this needs to be changed!" and ensure I don't derp this up again.

Some of you might know me from the Fluffybooru Boards, where I tried to bring Love and Tolerance and failed miserably, so I'm back to the saner parts of the Internet for my own mental health. If I am/have violated any part of the Site Rules, I don't think I have but I have likely missed something, please let me know asap so it can be changed and brought into line with those rules. Not too good at BBC coding, but I am using The Writer's Group BBC Guide to try an keep up.

Anyways, thank you for stepping in to look over my work, and thank you for any comments you may leave. Be ruthless with your critique, so that I can continue to get better at this and hopefully be more entertaining that I was before.

The Usual Disclaimer:

The following is a work of parody, and is protected as Fair Use under section 17 U.S. Code § 107 of US Copyright Law. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all affiliated characters are property of Hasbro Inc.

I own nothing. All characters, settings and other belong to their respective owners. This is purely a fan-work with no intent towards profit, slander or harm towards the characters, settings or other, or their respective owners. If the respective owners feel that this fan-work in any way, shape or form threatens or besmirches their property, please let me know so that it be can be removed asap.

Please support the show.

Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

Three weeks ....

Celestia's Beard, it seemed like such a long time to Twilight Sparkle. Three weeks of only being able to talk to her friends through short letters that she managed to send to Spike through a variation of the same spell that Celestia used for the Friendship Reports.

Necessity had forced Twilight to learn the 'Flame-Scroll' spell because the very first letter she had sent to Rarity had been stolen from the mail-box by one of Canterlot's Mail-mares and sold for a small fortune to the magazines in Canterlot. Unfortunately, she’d gone through six vials of Dragon-Fire sending and receiving mail from her friends, and the scarcity of the stuff had stopped her from sending more letters, especially with her current predicament meaning she was unable to leave the castle to quietly buy more.

"Princess of Friendship unsure of her abilities!" was one of the least embarrassing headlines that came out of that nightmare. It still confused and angered Twilight that a dozen different magazines come up with a dozen different stories all from a single letter? She knew the media was scandal-hungry to sell their newpapers and magazines, but she had always expected the articles to have some sort of journalistic method to them. What had happened to her was just out-and-out lying couched in journalistic ‘rights’ that the Royal Lawyers said would cost a fortune to fight for the truth, and would only result in a ‘slap on the wrist’ fine for the lying bas … incompetent journalists.

Not that everything was going well for her now anyways ... Princess Celestia had barely had time to talk to Twilight, since the Gryphon Tribes had immediately demanded to know what the presence of a Fourth Alicorn meant for the already unstable treaty between Equestria and their own country, the United States of Gryphonia, openly beginning ‘military exercises’ on the borders between the two Nations before Celestia had flexed her ‘Princess’ muscles and called down a Solar Flare on a mountain next to their capital when the Gryphon Army got a touch too close to the border itself.

And then the Princess had had to go to the Everfree Forest personally to handle the rather surly brood of a Hydra that Twilight had met over a year ago, an especially hungry and surly brood that had been attacking Ponies along the many rivers and streams that lead out of the Everfree Forest, leaving Twilight alone but for Princess Luna and an army of smiling, faceless servant-ponies.

Luna ... Twilight sighed despondently and started running complex magical formulae through her mind, trying to think of anything but that morning.

The 'Clack' incident. The moment when Luna had ordered Twilight to stay in her quarters and study up on the cultural quirks of the Nobility. It was almost like being under house arrest, she wasn't allowed to go anywhere near the throne room or Luna's quarters, and she was forbidden to speak about the 'incident' to anyone!

Twilight remember the moment when everything had gone horribly wrong all too well. It was the fifteenth day after Princess Celestia and the White-Stripes Regiment of the Royal Guard had left to drive back the swarm of Baby Hydras slithering out of the Everfree Forest, and just before the sun was due to rise, Luna and Twilight, already tired after an overlong shift involving most of the day before and all of the night covering for the missing Princess, the two had settled down in Luna's room so the Princess of the Night could explain the basics of Dream-Walking, when the inevitable started to happen.

Without the constant yammering of the Nobility, or the constantly glaring presence of the Guard-Ponies, seated on a thick, warm rug with a fire blazing nearby and no sleep for almost a full day, both of them started to nod off with their horns still charged with magic.

She'd been half-asleep at the time, thinking "No, must ... stay awake! Luna ... will be disa ... disappointed if I ... fall asleep ..." as her head started to tilt forwards, and then she felt something clack against the very tip of her horn.

Then everything went out of control.

Twilight could feel every hair on her body, from the long strands of her tail to the short, soft hairs on her face stand on end as a strange magic shot through her body from her horn and back again.

And the source of the 'strange' magic had been Luna herself, the contact of the tips of their horns and the magic contained within the Lunar Princess's horn surging into Twilight. And from the look on Luna's face, she was also being 'charged' with Twilight's own newly augmented magic.

There were two facts about the 'Clack' incident, as Twilight had come to call the moment when the warm, often 'adorkable' friendship between herself and Luna had shattered like so much fine porcelain, two facts that made no sense to the new Alicorn.

The first was that not only did the sudden influx of 'other' Magic not cause pain, as the sudden invasion of a foreign energy-wave should have been, rather it seemed to revitalize her like not even the quintuple-strength espresso shots she and Luna had been chugging all day long had been able to do.

The second was that Twilight could also feel the strange surge travelling through Luna's body as well. It was ... like seeing a mirror image, but she was 'seeing' it with every fibre of her, and Luna's, body.

It had only gone on for a few seconds at most, both Mares sitting there, muscles locked, mouths open in silent 'O's of surprise, before Luna jerked her head back, blinking furiously before giving a startled meep that would have made Fluttershy proud and scooted away, holding a hoof to her mouth in shock.

Looking back, Twilight realised now that leaping up after Luna, firing off a barrage of questions without pausing for breath and not giving Luna any personal space after an event that made the Lunar Princess shy away was probably one of her most bone-headed mistakes to date.

And of course, then she just had to mention what had happened to their horns ... Twilight could still see Luna's pupils shrinking to pin-pricks as the older Alicorn looked up at their horns and gasped.

Twilight's horn had a small speck of Luna's midnight black-blue colouration on the very tip, and in turn, Luna had a tiny spot of purple on hers.

Then Luna had absolutely no compunctions about laying her hooves on Twilight, shoving the newest Princess into Luna’s own private bathroom and insisting that Twilight not leave until she had covered up the 'spark-mark' with a generous coating of makeup, then had unceremoniously pushed Twilight out of her chambers and insisted that 'Mrs Sparkle' be escorted to her quarters immediately, and that Court for the next day was cancelled.

It had been five days now, and while Luna had supposedly re-joined the Court, Twilight was still confined to quarters until Princess Celestia came back.

Was it something I said? Is there some sort of Royal protocol I broke? Did Luna think I was attacking her? Twilight groaned as she paced a circle of her room for the thirteen hundredth time.

Yes, she was keeping count. She had also banged her head against the wall sixty-eight times trying to rattle her brain into coming up with a working plan to patch up their friendship, attempted to send a letter of apology to Luna no less than eighty-seven times before the Guards told her in no uncertain terms that Luna was shunting the letters into a pocket dimension as soon as they appeared, and by now Twilight has gone through a dozen crates of chalk and two chalk-boards trying to make a chart of possible causes for the mutual surges of magical energy through each other's horns.

So all she could do was wait till Celestia returned, which should be early tomorrow morning, and try to not have another of her panic attacks, which meant Twilight had to distract herself as much as possible. Until then, all Twilight could do was keep going through these old scrolls from the History Wing of the library, and see if any of these ancient treaties on the Royal Equestrain Protocols would give her an insight into what she'd done to offend Luna so badly!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luna struggled to maintain a calm, regal expression as she deliberated on the matter at hoof before her. Two of the lesser Noble Families of Canterlot had been feuding constantly for the past seven years about ownership of a small property on the outskirts of Canterlot's market district, and now the matter was to be dealt with by the Royal Court, after being passed through every other level of mediation available!

Their conflict at least offered a distraction from the ... confusion that Luna had had to endure stoically over the past few days.

Sparking! With Twilight Sparkle, of all Ponies! Her very first friend in this new, bohemian era, her Sister's beloved personal student to boot, and they had done something so ... so embarrassing! Luna was both looking forward to and dreading in equal measures Tia's return to Canterlot.

Hopefully Celestia, or 'Tia' to Luna, would be able to resolve the issue delicately. Right now, Luna could scarcely bear to be in the same room as Twilight, her embarrassment was so great. And Twilight was so innocent, she had no idea what had occurred between them that night! How could Luna tell Twilight what had happened without ruining their friendship?

So all Luna felt she could do was put on a brave face and hold down the fort until her elder, and hopefully wiser, Sister returned. Unfortunately, that meant dealing with aggravating duties such as the court-case before her.

The Golden Hooves and the Amber Swirls had been through every other level of Equestria’s legal systems, fighting their battles in bitterly contested court-battles, levelling accusations, claim and counter-claim at each other every step of the way, most of which were spurious at best and down-right slanderous at worst, with whispers of sabotage, scandal and vandalism that had sapped the once-great wealth of both families.

Mediation was a waste of time, as soon as the core members of both families were in the same room without a sizeable number of the Canterlot Guards nearby, it descended into a gigantic slanging match, or as displayed during the last incident, costing several thousand bits of repairs to the nearby businesses when the two families had bumped into each other in the street, and the collateral damage from their magical duels had shattered windows, terrified the customers and staff, and had even set the interiors of several shops on fire.

"... and so, your Majesty, it is without a doubt my family who should be compensated for our time and ..."

"Slanderous, conniving, common-born upstart! My family owned that shop for generations, while yours worked in ..."

"Order in the Court!" The Senschenal shouted, and was promptly ignored by the two families, who abandoned any pretence of 'nobility' and jumped to their hooves, hurling insults and cups of coffee or water at each other.

Note to self: Ponies are only to be given disposable plastic cups in court. Luna thought to herself, desperately resisting the urge to burst into laughter as two particularly infuriated Unicorns threw their cups at each other at the exact same time and gave each other matching black eyes.

" ... wouldn't know what hard work was if it came up and bucked you in the ..."

"ORDER!" The Senschenal screamed now, turning a shade of purple that would have made a turnip proud.

"...your thugs attacked my cousin, you black-hearted ..."

" ... and your mother needs to grow eyes in the back of her head, so she can ..."

Finally Luna decided she, and the Court itself, had heard enough, and more importantly, that she was worried that the long-suffering Senschenal was about to have a rage-induced coronary on the spot, and so slammed her hoof down on the pedestal, then again with far more force, when the two families ignored her, red-faced and spitting, pointing hooves and glowing horns accusingly at each other.

"Oh for the love of ... STILL THINE TONGUES!" Luna roared in frustration, slipping back into the 'Royal Canterlot Voice', nearly deafening the poor Guards in front of her and immediately silencing the two bickering families and the muttering crowd. "Enough, enough, ENOUGH! I think the entire Court has heard enough of your antics to realise that between the lot of you, not one single Pony amongst either the Golden Hooves or the Amber Swirls possesses the maturity or grace to settle this matter peacefully!"

"But your majesty, we have ..."

"They have no right to our ..."

"SILENCE! I have spent the better part of last night going over this case and have consulted with the Royal Archivists on the matter as well. Since neither party can prove one way or the other who the original owners deeded the shop to, as well as your display today, in addition to the dozens of violent altercations between your families and employees in public, it has been made abundantly clear that if one side received ownership of the property in dispute, the other side would stop at nothing to ruin them." Luna snapped, pounding the pedestal again until order was restored as the Amber Swirls and Golden Hooves all leapt up to proclaim their rights and innocence. "In which case, as a member of the Royal Family and in accordance with Article 26, Paragraph 35 of the Disputed Property by-laws, 'in the case where neither party is capable of providing undeniable proof of ownership, the property shall default to the crown'."

In the deathly silence of the Court, Luna rose from her throne and fixed her best 'Nightmare Moon' glare on the two feuding Noble families, all of whom were staring back at her, doing their best impressions of stunned goldfish. "Thus, the property shall default to the Crown. My sister and I shall find suitable tenants to occupy the building, and they will not be harassed, am I clear? In addition, I am fining both the Golden Hooves and the Amber Swirl families a sum of ten thousand bits each for tarnishing the dignity of the Nobility with this feuding, the total sum of which shall be distributed to the Ponies whom have been caught up in your fighting as compensation for damages and lost business. Furthermore, I am placing restraining orders on the family-members and staff of both families, preventing either side from going within 100 feet of the property, the ponies who will inhabit it or the properties and owners of the businesses you have damaged with your feuding."

You could have heard a pin drop in the silence as the Golden Hooves and Amber Swirls stared at her, mouths working silently in rage or horror ... then the rest of the Court started to murmur, and Luna felt her heart sink as she wondered if perhaps she had let her heart lead, rather than her head.

Then the assorted Nobles and Common-Ponies of Canterlot started clapping and cheering for Luna as the white faces of the two Noble Families turned pink with embarrassment or purple with rage.

"The Princess will hear of this outrage!" An older Unicorn from the Golden Hooves family shouted angrily as the Royal Guard moved in and ushered the two Noble families out through separate doors.

"A Princess has, Almond of the Golden Hooves." Luna replied back, loudly and tartly, which set the Court to more laughter. A cheap shot, and possibly one beneath her station, but damn did it feel good to finally get one over on these scheming, back-stabbing Nobles that Tia had let infest Equestria...

"Recorder, I want a full copy of this session ready for my sister when she returns." Luna whispered to the Pony in charge of keeping written records of each court-case, who was franticly pounding away at her typewriter and barely nodded before reaching for a fresh batch of paper to obey the command. "The last thing my sister needs is to have the Nobles trying to rile her up ... I'm certain she's had quite enough excitement for a while dealing with the Hydra Spawn."

"Your Highness, we have three more cases to deal with before Court ends for the day." One of the Day Guard murmured softly, his eyes not leaving the crowd. "Do you wish us to suspend Court for ten minutes, so you may have a moment to yourself, or do you wish to continue?"

Luna paused and looked out at the crowd of Ponies, all whispering and talking and looking at her ...

Yes, ten minutes alone sounded perfectly divine right now.

"Please apologise to the Ponies, but I will need a few minutes to clear my mind and be impartial for the next cases." Luna replies in an equally soft voice, having to wait and endure the lengthy shuffle as Court was dismissed for ten minutes, and every Pony tried to leave at once, resulting in a bottle-neck at every entrance.

"Dawn Ray, do we still have any of Pony Joe's triple-glazed masterpieces left?" Luna whispered as the day's 'commander' of Royal Guard escorted her from the chamber. "I have a sudden craving for something sweet after all the sour grapes we have just endured."

When the corner of the Guard's mouth quirked upwards in a smirk for a split second, Luna blamed it on a waking dream due her lack of sleep over the past two weeks.

"Yes, your Highness. Eight boxes worth, in fact." Dawn Ray murmured as they passed through a door hidden at the back of the throne room behind a thick, dark-red velvet drape, with a dozen Guard ponies sitting around, holding cups of coffee and rummaging through the boxes. "Or ... we had some doughnuts."

"Yuh-your Highness!" "At attention!" Several of the Guards actually tried to stand at attention, still holding their cups of coffee in their hooves and with donuts hanging out their mouths, almost burning themselves in the process, and one poor Stallion seemed to be choking on his meal!

"Please, no, there is no need." Luna tried to say with as much control as she could, but she couldn't help but chuckle as one Guard leaned over and slapped his choking comrade so hard on the back that the remaining donut in his mouth shot forwards and stuck to the breastplate of another Guard.

Yet despite all this, as soon as the Guards had assumed their positions, they were stone-faced except for the very faintest pink colouration to their faces and dustings of powdered sugar and sprinkles on their mouths.

"Ahem ... yes. As We, ah, my apologies, I was saying, there is no need for formality, gentlemen." Luna started again, desperately trying to keep a straight face and not laugh at the poor ponies. "I merely came here for some of Pony Joe's famous donuts, and then I shall depart."

"Yes, your majesty!" The Guards barked as one, marching in lockstep away from the boxes, and it was all Luna could do not to roll her eyes and face-hoof.

I understand their training requires them to be stoic and unwavering, but would it truly be such a burden to simply say “yes.” like a normal Pony every now and again? Luna thought to herself as she walked over to the boxes, frowning as she saw that almost every one of the boxes was empty but for crumbs.

Each one of Pony Joe's deluxe boxes contained 2 dozen of his finest donuts ... and yet somehow twelve Stallions had finished off over a hundred and fifty donuts.

I wonder if Tia would let me insist on diets for all of them. And an additional lap around Canterlot for a week. Those were MY donuts! Luna thought, half jealous, half envious as she lifted the lids of each box, glaring at the empty spaces therein. If she ate that many donuts in one setting, Alicorn metabolism or no, she'd go as round as a beach-ball in the space of a day, yet the Guards didn't look bloated at all. Damn them ...

On the final, and seventh box, she found a solitary donut waiting at the bottom of the box, and felt a momentary surge of panic as she took a closer look at it.

The Sun-be-damned donut had the exact colouration as the source of her vexation, Twilight Sparkle! The first layer of glazing had the same lavender-purple colouration, while the second layer of glazing had a much darker shade of purple reminiscent of Twilight’s mane, with pink sprinkles running across the surface of the donut in an amazingly accurate attempt to replicate the new Alicorn Princess's hair-style on one side of the donut, and her cutie-mark on the other.

Is there truly no way to escape this ... this entanglement? Luna thought to herself crossly, even as her magic gripped the delicious pastry.

Levitating the donut out of the box, Luna flipped the lid over ... and sighed.

Mane Six Donut Special! The box proclaimed loudly, featuring six donuts, all bearing the colouration of the six 'Elements' of Harmony in athletic poses. Taste the Elements of Harmonious Flavour!

Oh ... whatever. Luna was hungry, and quite frankly, she needed the sugar to be able to function during the next few cases at the level her subjects deserved. Sleep was a precious commodity at the best of times, and with Tia absent and her work-load now effectively doubled, Luna was relying upon magical sleep spells to ensure she slept deeply and untroubled by the dreams of her subjects, a grievous blow to her morale as things stood to begin with, and copious amounts of caffeine and sugar to get through the day left her feeling jittery all day long.

"Hmm ... grape flavoured? No ... maybe boysenberry?" Luna wondered aloud as she ate with dainty bites, trying without much success to keep the mental image of her 'eating' Twilight out of her mind, and blessing Mother Earth that her dark fur mostly masked any blushing she might be suffering from.

Luna may have been on the moon for the past one thousand years, but that didn't mean she was ignorant of what Ponies got up to behind closed doors. She had been the Goddess of Night, and that included all things Ponies did during the night, even if some of those things were emotionally confusing to Luna.

Dreams especially were her forte, hence Luna being put forth as Twilight Sparkle's mentor for Dream-Walking, but still to wander through the dreamscape these days tested her resolve in many ways. Ponies were very ... their expressions of love were much less confined than she thought they would have been, especially when compared to the attitudes of her era.

The taste of grape on her tongue, and the colouration of the pasty in her hooves, brought Luna to blushing as she recalled several Dreams she had been caught up in, struggling against the lusts and dream-scapes of several Mares who had, of all things, desired her as a bed-mate. Her cheeks flushed harder as her rebellious mind conjured an image of Twilight Sparkle, her slender form prone and vulnerable beneath Luna's own ...

No! NO! I am no filly-fooler! I am ... not that way ... it’s not right for a Princess to behave so, right? Luna thought, beating the images down and imagining the coming cases, which thankfully drowned out any arousal she might have felt, but the thoughts of how Equestrain society had changed so drastically in the thousand years of her banishment settled over her like a mental shroud.

Tia's maids, for example, had very beautiful maid outfits, but the cut of the dress left very ... little to the imagination, especially when one walked behind said Maids. And Celestia flatly refused to discuss why the maids required such outfits to be in her service!

And why do ponies need to wear clothing in the first place? Luna thought wryly as she finished off the last of the donut, realising with a start that the Guards were all staring at her.

"Yes? Is there something on my face?" Luna asks nervously, suddenly aware of the silence.

"You've ... ah ... got a little bit of 'Twilight' on your lips still, your Highness." One of the Guards stuttered, and Luna brought a hoof up to her

... Twilight on your lips ... The words echoed through Luna's mind, making her blink rapidly and quickly wipe at her face with a foreleg.

"Ah, my thanks, Guard." Luna smiled nervously at the guards, mind working franticly. "It would not do to go before our subjects with grape jam on my face!"

"Just so, your Highness." Dawn Ray remarked with a deadpan look. "I must remain behind to have a short … talk … with the men, please, return to your duties, Your Highness, I will be along shortly."

Fed with a sizeable amount sweet pastry, and now not a little bit self-conscious as the gazes of the Guards that now seemed fixed on her face, Luna nodded and moved as fast as she could while still maintaining her regal bearing back to the Court.

Come home soon, sister dear! I am not meant for this sort of thing! Luna prayed as she returned to her throne, the Court already refilling with Ponies that she was now convinced knew of her internal conflicts, and perhaps a smudge of grape jam on her lips.

Twilight on your lips ...

"Oh be silent, thy vexatious voice ..." Luna muttered as the Senschenal began reading out the names of the Ponies whose case she would be overseeing next.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Did you see the way she lapped up the jam?"

"Jam? Try the way she was nibbling like that on the end of the donut. Thank the Sun for these codpieces!"

"Uh ... how old is she again?"

"Well, Cadence got married ... I guess the Princesses can ... well, you know!"

"RIGHT!" Dawn Ray snapped, glaring at his men, who suddenly remembered a veteran and senior officer was amongst them, snapping back to their parade stances, but this time with large beads of sweat that ran down their necks and faces. "I hear one more word about any of the Princesses in that tone of conversation come out of your mouths, I will personally buck you in the head so hard your grandfathers' cutie marks will fall off."

"So the Princess really likes jam filled donuts. So her way of eating them is ... reminiscent of a certain act." Dawn Ray growled, fixing each Guard with an angry look as he marched down the line. "Need I remind you of your oaths, to protect and serve, to honour and defend, unto death and beyond? Such attitudes are hardly conductive to Princess Luna's honour, nor does it serve her to have members of the Royal Guards look upon her like that!"

"Princess Luna has been absent from Equestria for a thousand years, and has been involved in countless meetings with private tutors for most of the past two years to bring her up to speed on the cultural reformations Equestria has undergone in her absence. She has barely left the castle in that time but for ceremonial duties, and has had almost no contact with her subjects but the staff and Guards of Canterlot Castle itself, and certainly no contact with the sorts of Mares you are all envisioning!" The greying Guard snapped as he turned and went back down the line again, glaring hard at the Guards. "If you cannot keep your minds from taking up residence under your tails, turn in your armour right here and now and leave Canterlot with all due haste. Otherwise, the Guard Corps expects you to act like grown Stallions, not Colts who just learned about the Birds and the Bees! We will not be having this discussion again ..."

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Chapter 7 (clop heavy)

CHAPTER 7

(Warning, this chapter contains a graphic scene.)

Ponyville, at the moment Luna and Twilight began their ‘test’ …

It was, over-all, a rather boring morning at the Cakes’ bakery. The hardest parts of making the day’s treats was over, and now all that remained was the pastries and cakes in the oven, baking in preparation for the mid-day rush, when Pinkie came vibrating into the kitchen, eyes rolling, tail twitching, ears flopping back and forth, a sure sign of her ‘Pinkie Sense’ in full, uncontrollable swing, Applejack and Rainbow Dash following in her wake with wide, panicked eyes.

“Wuh-wuh-wuh-wooooow! I’ve neverrrrrr ha-had a cu-cu-com-combinaaaaaation like thi-i-i-is!” Pinkie yelled, excited beyond words, as she vibrated around the expansive kitchen, at one point literally climbing the wall of the room, before shuddering out the door and into the actual shop-front with her friends following doggedly in her wake. “Majorrrrrrr-Su-u-u-u-uper Ullllltra Doooo-ziiiiiie in progre-e-e-e-ess!”

Looking at each other in alarm, the Cakes gave each other a quick nod, Ms Cake dropping her bowl full of frosting batter to the ground as she rushed up the stairs to grab their children and the first aid kit, Mr Cake abandoning several batches of jelly to ring the Mayor and explain the situation, before rushing to prepare the bomb-shelter under the kitchen for an extended stay, as a siren began to wail over Ponyville, alerting the citizens of the town that the ‘Pinkie Warning System’ had reached a critical level.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At that very moment.

In the Crystal Empire, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, or Cadence to her friends, was enjoying a quiet breakfast with her husband before a long day of pointless meetings and agonizingly boring paperwork, with only a handful of Crystal Ponies acting as ceremonial guards and servants nearby, when the bright pink Princess stopped mid-bite, her eyes growing wide in shock.

“Honey? What’s happened?” Shining Armor, the Royal Consort and Cadence’s husband, asked nervously, levitating his half-eaten bagel back down onto the plate as he watched his wife’s eyes get wider and wider, to an almost eerie proportion before her wings shot out, fully extended in a textbook display of a ‘Wingboner’. “Cadence?”

“Oh. My. Faust.” Cadence whispered, a manic grin spreading across her face. “Shining, I just felt the biggest … biggest surge of … of …”

“Honey, breathe. Breathe.” Shining said in as calm a voice as he could, rushing to his wife’s side as the Guards looked on with looks of confusion and alarm as their Princess seemed to be in the throes of some sort of mystic fit. “Is it the Changelings? Sombra? … Please don’t say Discord, I don’t think I can handle Discord in love, not without a lot of hard cider in me first.”

“I … can’t tell who … but oh FAUST! I can feel them, all the way from Equestria! There’s two Ponies out there who are … oh my … oh my …”

And then Cadence fainted into Shining’s hooves, wings still rigid and extended, her face locked in an expression of manic glee.

“…. Somepony fetch me some parchment, ink, a quill and a bottle of dragon-fire. Princess Celestia needs to know that there’s something happening within her borders that can affect Cadence to this point.” Shining snapped, the Crystal Pony guards saluting and rushing to obey the Royal Consort, the servants scattering after Shining Armor told them to go, and leave the care of his wife in his hooves.

Looking down at his Wife, twitching and mumbling to herself, Shining sighed, levitated a pitcher of water off the table and up-ended the contents over her … and frowned as the ‘cold shower treatment’ failed to do anything other than make Cadence’s clothing turn partially see-through and cling to her form.

At least now, however, he had an excuse for the puddle that had formed under Cadence’s chair halfway through the proceedings.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twilight convulsed.

She shuddered, writhed and thrashed under the covers, yet she was anchored to Luna by the tangled, sweaty sheets that held their bodies tightly together, and the tips of their horns, which had disappeared into a small, pulsing globe of magic the size of an apple, made of swirling purple and dusky blue light.

She was a rational Mare, one who approached life in a manner some would call orderly, but most would say was obsessive-compulsive. Twilight was also infamous for her panic-attacks if she deviated from her schedule even a little.

If any of her friends had been watching her right now, they would have been shocked to have seen the transformation from a shy, adorkable librarian into a thrashing, wanton mare, desperately writhing against Luna as the Lunar Princess in turn ground back against Twilight.

For the Sympathy was in full effect now, and all that Luna felt, Twilight felt, and the reverse was also true, as the two Mares clung to each other, babbling half-apologies, half-encouragements, as the orb of light surrounding the points of their horns swelled, then shrank again as more wisps of magical energy was sucked from it into the now glowing cube of rose quartz, Empathy’s Core.

And then from the Core, arcs of white, raw magical energy would shoot out, caressing the Alicorns’ bodies and all else inside the tent with snapping tendrils of crackling energy, which trickled into their internal reservoirs of magic, which in turn would channel itself down into their horns, and each time drawing more and more ambient energy from the world around them, creating a larger ‘surge’ of magic, and thus pleasure, with each pulse.

Fighting to keep her control in a sea of endless pulses of pleasure and the uncanny sensation of having two bodies grinding desperately against each other, a small part of Twilight’s mind remained coherent, if not entirely rational, watching the proceedings as if from afar with embarrassment, shock and not a little bit of awe.

We can’t stop. WE CAN’T STOP! We’re trapped in a feedback-loop with the Core! What can we … this isn’t right, the Shackles aren’t working right!

Struggling to remain in control, Twilight’s rational mind flailed amongst another wave of pleasure as Luna bore down on her once again, locking their mouths together in a passionate kiss as their bodies pressed tightly against each other.

It would be so easy to just … let go. To let the feedback-loop, and the Sympathy, overwhelm her and stay like this with Luna until their hearts exploded or Empathy’s Core shattered.

It was too much of a good thing, and neither she nor Luna seemed able to escape. It was so tempting to just let go, to grapple with Luna in this wild lust and let their Sympathy overpower them, to keep enjoying this raw, addictive pleasure endlessly.

But it wasn’t right. Twilight didn’t know why, but the frantic, desperate thrashing her body was engaged in just didn’t feel like what an intimate moment between two Ponies should be. It felt … animalistic, like something had been unleashed from inside them, and now controlled them, moving them to its own will.

Perhaps … maybe if we remove the shackles? No, no, that will just cause our power to run wild in the Everfree Forest. The disembodied consciousness of Twilight ran through various scenarios franticly, trying to maintain control as Luna reared back from the kiss as much as the magic that joined their horns would allow, to shift her hips against Twilights into a new angle, and proceeded to grind down with intense force, causing Twilight’s body to squeal in delight and thrust back against the Lunar Princess. But we did everything the scrolls said with the Shackles and the Core! It shouldn’t be this bad! The Sympathy shouldn’t be overwhelming us … like … this.

But what if it wasn’t the Shackles or the Core malfunctioning. What if it was something closer to home?

Twilight’s consciousness teetered on a knife-edge, torn between panicking and trying something drastic or letting the sensations from her body overwhelm her, furiously attempting to come up with some other solution, some other answer, but it was the only answer she had.

The problem was not in the artefacts, or their use. It was in Luna and herself. They were overpowering the Relics, not the other way around. The Shackles, Empathy’s Core, both of them had been created by a Unicorn, but not with Alicorns in mind, especially not two of them!

With no other options, Twilight’s consciousness looked at the two bodies locked together beneath her, screwed up its metaphorical courage, and released its hold to the surges of pleasure, swirling down back into her body as the two Ponies beneath her began to shudder and shake, calling out each other’s names louder and louder …

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Further into the dark heart of the Everfree, a sleepy and somewhat annoyed Zecora stared at the masks on the walls of her home, eyeing the shaking of the tiki-masks with well-deserved nervousness as the Forest around her quivered.

“What is happening, I want to know, that can make this forest shudder so?” The Zebra muttered, then began trotting around her living room, patting the masks and trying to calm the minor spirits that lived within them, but to little avail. “No malice or anger that this Zebra can sense, but the power I feel is of great consequence.”

And then, just as suddenly as it had started, the quivering of the spirits of the Everfree forest stopped, and the Zebra shook herself, feeling as if some force had been lifted from the air.

“How curious, how strange, this force that has no name. Perhaps it is nothing, perhaps it is not, but one thing I know, I must alert Canterlot!” The Zebra rhymed to herself once more, reaching for a quill and the nearby vial of rare, and expensive Dragonfire, when every hair on her body stood on end.

“Whatever comes now, I fear it will suck!” Zecora cried out as she felt the return of the un-named force return at much greater strength, an invisible wall of force that rushed through the Everfree Forest, scattering the Spirits before it and burying Zecora in terrified Tiki-Masks and other knick-knacks, the Zebra shouting in confusion and annoyance as she heard the unmistakable sound of glass shattering. “AND FORGIVE THIS ONE’S LANGUAGE, BUT WHAT THE BLOODY BUCK?”

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An hour later …

In the comfort of the royal suite in the Crystal Castle, Cadence lay face down on her bed, blushing furiously as her wings jutted straight up from her back and twitching constantly, with Shining Armor rubbing her back and promising her it would all be alright.

Thankfully, nobody had clued in that Cadence appeared to be suffering the world’s worst case in inappropriate wing-boners, the lack of pegasi amongst the Crystal Ponies proving to be of great benefit to the Royal Family. Shining had quickly come up with an excuse when one of the Guards questioned why Cadence couldn’t fold up her wings, that for Cadence at least, the limbs functioned as a sort of radar system for powerful ‘Love-Love Waves’, which meant that when Cadence detected such a powerful wave, they would automatically unfurl to help pin-point the location.

It was a load of complete and utter manure he’d made up on the spot, but since the Crystal Ponies had had no contact with the other races of Ponies in over a thousand years, and considering Shining Armor was the Royal Consort and one of the heroes who helped save them from the return of Sombra, they believed it.

He also had a sinking suspicion that they thought if he was willing to throw his wife at Sombra off a balcony to win, what he would do to them would be the stuff of nightmares. His drill sergeant would have shed a tear in pride. His PR agent had torn his mane out in anguish.

Thank Faust that nobody has actually been able to study an Alicorn. That excuse should prevent a scandal from forming. Shining thought, wiping a hoof across his face to remove the layer of sweat that had formed carrying Cadence up the stairs, since he’d refused to allow the Guards to manhandle his wife, for fear of them noticing certain other things that were happening to his wife.

Dumping that pitcher of water over his wife had been his best idea to date. Any damp stains on his uniform were easily explained as moisture from that, rather than Cadence’s … problem.

As a security measure, Shining had immediately placed a barrier around the Royal Suite to keep any would-be snoops or well-meaning servants out while his wife tried to compose herself, but it had been close to an hour, and whatever, or who-ever, was doing this to Cadence hadn’t stopped or slowed one bit.

It was somewhat irritating. A small part of Shining’s mind resented the fact that somewhere, somehow, somepony was doing this to his wife, right in front of him, so to speak. His pride felt impugned that somebody else could make Cadence make that kind of face …

“Oh. My. Fa-aaaaaaaaauuuuu-ust.” Cadence whimpered, her wings quivering as another ‘spasm’ gripped her. “I don’t know who they a-aaaaahaah! Who they are, but I’ve never, ever felt anything quite like this!”

“Is there anything I can do, darling? Bag of ice? Cup of tea? I’m afraid that I only know how to the flick the ‘switch’ on, not off, as it were.” The white unicorn sighed, then frowned and put up a second barrier around the room, weaving it into the bricks, the doors and even the windows, attuning it to block any attempt to magically teleport into the Royal Suite or use magic to scry the room or its inhabitants. Combined with the first, opaque barrier designed to prevent physical entry, it would surely keep out all but the Solar and Lunar Princesses themselves.

No doubt at least one Pony had run to the local gossip-merchants the moment Cadence had suffered her ‘Love-Love Wave’ attack, and there’d be Ponies, Crystal and normal alike, trying to spy on them even now.

Such was the life of royalty and a national hero-couple … as poor Twilight had found out the hard way. Shining was still wondering if it would cause a diplomatic incident to go and kick a certain editor of one of those gossip-rags square under his tail once or thrice.

“Shining … I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, but they just won’t … woo! They won’t stop. Sssssso could you he-help me by …” Cadence’s voice slipped as the tremor built to a crescendo, and Shining couldn’t help but smile as he remembered the last time he’d seen Cadence face-down on the bed, quivering like that.

For a Princess of ‘Love’, she’d never really experienced the physical side of it. I don’t think I’ll ever forget the expression on her face the first time I brought her over the edge like that.

“You want me to … ‘help’?” Shining asked softly, leaning down to whisper into Cadence’s ears, then nibbling softly on the very tip of one of those ears while the Prince-Consort sent a hoof trailing down her back and then under her tail, causing his wife to moan sweetly. “Are you sure? I mean, I want to, it has been a while, but right now? I thought we were holding off until we had time to, you know, prepare in case I got you pregnant?”

“Shining, darling, if you are not inside me within the next minute, I think I am going to throw myself at the next male that walks into the room, pony or otherwise!” The pink ‘Princess of Love’ growled, raising her rear from the thoroughly-soaked sheets and giving him a smouldering look that set his blood pounding. “This is like a … like being in the middle of the worst estrus ever! I need you!”

“As my lady commands…” Shining replied, eagerly divesting himself of his uniform and, after a moment’s thought, placing a third magical barrier, this one intended to block and muffle any sounds from passing through it from either side, around the room before guiding Cadence into a more comfortable position.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Another hour later

“Twilight, are you sure you don’t want me to move?”

“M’kay. S’good squish.”

“I … is that even Equestrian? Twilight?”

“Sleepeh …”

“Twilight …” Luna murmured, somewhat peeved as Twilight, as tired, sore and no-doubt as satisfied as Luna was, closed her eyes, an angelic smile on her face, and lapsed into post-orgasm slumber.

Unfortunately, Luna still had an itch to scratch, as it were, and despite how sore certain parts of her anatomy were, the Alicorn had hoped to keep scratching at that itch, even as part of her mind quailed at asking Twilight to keep going with the more … physical aspects of their ‘test’.

Still … it took two hours for the magic to weaken to the point where we could regain control and stop … stop sparking each other. Two. Hours. And Twilight kept up with me the entire time. Luna blushed and shifted on-top of Twilight, trying to find a more comfortable position, wincing as sore, chafed flesh trailed across equally sore flesh, and tried once more to untangle the sheets that had gotten wrapped around the two Alicorns, once again without much success.

Their horns were also suffering. While the ‘feedback loop’ with the Core had certainly recharged them far faster than they would have on their own, the sheer volume of magic, and the length of time it had been channelled, had left both of their horns swollen and sensitive to the touch, and not in a good way. Even casting a simple telekinesis spell was giving Luna a headache.

Does this make us fi…filly-foolers? Luna found herself wondering, denied the ability to slip into endorphin-fuelled slumber like Twilight by her confusion and nervousness, and with her mind working itself into knots of maybe and perhaps that looped back upon themselves like snakes eating their own tails. Will Twilight hate me when she wakes up and is coherent? Will ‘Tia accept what happened as just an accident? I’m scared … it’s all too much, too fast, all at once!

Twilight had been mumbling something about it being them, rather than the artefacts, as the cause of the feedback loop, but surely that wasn’t the case.

Luna had had perfect control of her body for several millennia! She’d even repressed her Heat successfully while on the Moon for a … thousand … years …

………………

Oh bother.

Chapter 21 (Clop Light)

CHAPTER 21

“MOVE, LADIES! DOUBLE TIME, HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE!” Glimmer sighed and put a hoof to her head, willing the headache to go away as she watched her C.O. run the Guards under his command ragged to prepare for the ‘invasion’.

Not that the scrying of the Outpost had revealed more than thirty or forty Changelings at most, and the badly wounded Queen that had to be carried with exaggerated care into the Outpost at the border by her Drones, in short it was exactly as what the lone Guard had described: That the once five-thousand-strong Hive of the Changeling Queen had been reduced to a tiny cluster of refugees herding cats, and a deathly sick Queen who couldn’t even walk on her own.

Not that Brass Stars, arrogant hot-head that he was, seemed to care. This was his opportunity to ‘settle the score’ between himself and the Changelings. That he had been shipped out to the only border Equestria possessed that did not have another nation on the other side to avoid a repeat-performance of the diplomatic incidents he’d caused at the Labyrinthia/Equestria border, and that he’d been rejected six times from the Wonderbolts training program for being too aggressive towards the other trainees, never factored into her hot-blooded C.O.’s thoughts.

No, just like always, it was somepony or something else at fault, and he was unfairly blamed. The Unicorn, her pale, almost ethereally so, pink coat incongruous against the uniform of the Royal Guard, wondered if it were possible that Princess Celestia and the Three Generals were somehow punishing her for some unknown transgression by putting the hot-blooded Brass Stars in charge of her and the other Guards at Garrison 42.

“Sir, if I might say, again, this does not seem to be an invasion. We should wait for the Mages from Canterlot to arrive, and then we can begin scanning every Pony at the Outpost for signs of Changeling mind-control …”

“We’ve got no time for those glory-hogging pansies! I won’t let that Bug get away this time!” The Pegasus Major yelled, his wings trembling with excitement. Probably the first chance you’ve got to yell at the troops without getting odd looks since you got here! “I’ll capture that bloody Changeling, present her to the Princesses and finally get a decent posting!”

“So sorry to hear holding the border secure isn’t as fulfilling as you had hoped, Sir, but perhaps you should read the message from Command?” The Unicorn officer did her best to turn her face-hoof into a salute as she levitated the print-out to the larger, dull-orange Pegasus, who scowled at her, but with all of the Guards that were in the parade-grounds staring at them, Brass Stars had no choice but to take the orders and read them, his eager expression souring quickly into a frown, and then a trembling mask of rage. “Our orders are to …”

“I can read, Glimmer.” Brass Stars grated, slamming the orders down onto the nearest crate, and then mashing his hoof down on the offending paper for good measure. “When I find the Pony that went over my head and alerted Command about the location of the Changeling Queens, heads will roll, Glimmer. That’s my prey, that’s my chance to climb up the ranks, not some jammy little snot who ignores the chain of command!”

“Be that as it may, Sir, Command has insisted on playing this as diplomatically as we can, especially given how antsy our neighbours have gotten after the Princess decided to call down the wrath of the Sun on the Gryphons.” Glimmer replied, poker-faced against the Major’s anger, praying internally for the poor sap who had the balls to sidestep the Major’s authority. “If we can prove we can handle a potential threat like Chrysalis without military force, we might be able to keep our other borders from becoming hot-spots like the border we share with Gryphonia.”

“Oh whoop de friggin’ do! Congratulations, Private Glimmer, once again you’ve managed to find a bit’s worth of silver lining on the cloud of shit that keeps me from flying high.” Brass Stars snarled, turning to the troops who had slowed down their efforts to put on their armor and ready their weapons to watch the Major and his adjutant verbally spar again.

“Actually, sir, I’m a Captain. Perhaps now would be the time to give the troops their new orders, from General Rhinestone?”

“You’ll be a Private if I have any say …” Brass Stars muttered, then cleared his throat and addressed the Guards-Ponies loudly and clearly. “Alright ladies, listen up! It appears somebody in the garrison can’t stop flappin’ their gums, and has let spill to the Generals about the Bug-Bitch’s arrival in my territory. So now, instead of protecting Equestria by slapping her with some bug-spray and throwing her in a cage, we’re to ‘hold position’ until the Mages can arrive and ensure that Chrysalis can’t manipulate our minds, while the Bugs dig in and fortify just a few hours away. So let’s hope that our friends at the Outpost aren’t being turned into puppets like that limp-wrist, Shining Armor.”

“General Rhinestone assures me that the Magi will arrive sometime tonight on an express train commandeered from Canterlot itself, but I want us ready to go the instant they arrive! Think of this as a chance to triple-check your gear and get some sleep before we move out to take the Bug into custody!” Pacing back and forth on the raised platform that constituted the barrack’s ‘observation’ post of the parade grounds, the Major’s eyes swept over the Guards, and a sneer spread across his face. “I don’t care what the Generals say, Chrysalis is a clear and present threat to the Ponies we are sworn to protect! The instant even one Changeling makes a move that could be argued as threatening, your orders are to take them down. I will not have one single hair on a Pony harmed again because some bigwig in Canterlot wants another olive-leaf in their laurel! Am I clear, ladies?”

“Sir yes sir!” Came the conditioned response, but it was lacklustre and hesitant, and Brass Stars knew it, his sneer turning into a frown, his eyes glaring at his subordinates with utter contempt.

“Very well! Let us hope you show more vigor when we face the enemy! DISMISSED!” Brass Stars shouted, saluted and stalked away, not bothering to wait for the answering salute from his troops, leaving Glimmer to oversee the rest in a spiteful move.

Faust give me strength. Why did Major Stonehoof have to retire? The Unicorn thought as she sent the three units that were stationed in the garrison to their assigned duty-rosters, planning to keep the youngest, and thus least-experienced, Guards behind to patrol the Garrison and the two more experienced units of Guards to be prepared for the Mages from Canterlot, as no-doubt Brass Stars would make good on his ‘promise’ to move out as soon as they arrived.

Which, given the time-table of the train’s arrival, assuming nothing happened to the tracks, would be sometime after midnight. So he’d be pushing his troops to fight enemies with the ability to alter their shape and colouration in the darkest part of the night with only a crescent moon and mage-lights to identify them. Standard Brass Stars genius at work…

“Sir, about the Major … whose orders do we follow? The General, or the Major’s?” One of the Corporals asked, silencing the room by addressing the elephant that lurked there directly.

“We obey the chain of command, and that means you follow the General’s orders.” Glimmer stated loudly, giving the Corporal a firm look. “Brass Stars cannot give you orders that conflict with those of a superior officer, especially not in this situation, where those orders conflict with the orders he himself is supposed to be following.”

“Honestly sir, we’re more worried about being put through hell after this is all over. Nobody wants to have the Major breathing down their necks because we disobeyed his orders to fulfil the General’s commands.” The Corporal pointed out, starting to sweat nervously as Glimmer eyed him coldly. “Sir, some of us have families who depend on the wages we earn as Royal Guards. We can’t afford to lose our positions.”

“You cannot be drummed out of the Royal Guard for obeying the orders of a higher-ranking Officer over that of a lower-ranking one. Calm down.” Glimmer said loudly and clearly, noting how the Ponies around her relaxed slightly, but still looked tense. Worried. If Stonehoof were still here, these Ponies wouldn’t be worried about this, they’d be calm and ready to obey their orders without complaint. I don’t care who Brass Stars’s cousin is, he’s too great a risk to the Garrison’s morale and effectiveness to let things continue as they have. “If you wish to make an official complaint, please write a letter and give it to me. I have to send our monthly report to Canterlot, and I already send the mail of most of the Garrison with it, so additional letters will not be noticed, and Major Brass Stars will never know whom amongst you made the complaints.”

“Sir!” The Guards saluted smartly, drifting away in small groups to fulfil their duties, leaving a very fatigued Glimmer to trudge back to her small office, shaking her head at the situation.

Stonehoof had retired due to old age and injuries that had prevented the Unicorn from performing to his full abilities and had nominated his best soldier, herself, to be promoted and take command of the Garrison, but the promotion hadn’t gone to Glimmer, but to a certain Pegasus whose ego kept him bouncing around the country to get him away from the messes he made and whose famous family-member’s connections kept him from being bounced out of the Guard. Still, Glimmer thought wryly, at least within the Royal Guard, Brass Stars has to obey orders, and if he goes AWOL we can just throw him into a military prison for a few years. If he was a civilian, there’d be a whole mess of claims and counter-claims in the courts and plea-bargains. In the Guard, at least, Brass Stars is easily contained, but I just wish the rest of the Guards and I didn’t have to suffer like this.

An hour later, Glimmer stared at the pile of ‘letters’ and ‘correspondence’ and facehoofed.

She’d expected perhaps five or six official complaints, not for pretty much every single soldier in the Garrison to deliver her a bundle of mail, most of which appeared to be blank pieces of paper folded up and put into envelopes with scurrilous addresses, with a handful of actual ‘letters’ which held the official complaints.

Assuming the mass is X, times Y for distance… Glimmer sighed and began running the mental calculations on how to send all the mail at once to General Rhinestone, looking at the bottle of Dragonfire in her hooves. Oh manure, I’ll need to use half the bottle if I send everything, and trying to explain that to Brass Hooves or the Accounting Division will be next to impossible. I’ll just send the complaints to the General, claim they were letters to the Guards’ families and sent under the Compassion Act, and dispose of the rest of this junk later.

“Dammit …” Glimmer swore as she put the bottle down in the drawer and began the process of sorting the ‘false’ mail from the formal complaints.

She could only hope that the lone Guard at the Outpost was not having too much trouble.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Seriously. Get out.”

“My Queen wishes to know where you are at all times.”

“Can I … just … give me five minutes, okay?”

“You are our only defence against Ponies who may wish to cause harm to our Hive. You must be guarded from harm.”

“We’re in the damn toilet! What are you expecting, ninjas to come out of the bowl?”

“My Queen has ordered me to stay by your side until otherwise commanded. Thus, I shall do so.”

“CAN I PEE IN SOLITUDE, PLEASE?”

“We are not stopping you.”

“I can’t go if you’re watching me!”

“You were able to go when we first me.”

“That … that wasn’t … I was … look! Two totally different things, okay! Just … step out of the cubicle for five minutes. Listen in, I don’t care, but I can’t go if you’re literally standing right next to me!”

“But your organ is …”

“STOP LOOKING AT IT!” Dapplied shouted, mortified as he hoof-handled the inquisitive, obtuse Changeling out of the cubicle, blushing furiously as he planted both front-hooves on it's … her chitin-covered hind-quarters and getting an unfortunate glimpse at the ‘equipment’ before pushing ‘Scout’ completely out of the room before slamming the door and flicking the lock shut.

“Damn it …” The Stallion whimpered, shuffling back to the bowl and trying to think of baseball and rootbeer, trying to will the painful pressure in his bladder to come out to no avail.

He was hard. No, scratch that, he was freaking adamantite-hard. His was the rod that could pierce the heavens. He was wielding the Lance of Longinus.

It was the return of the ‘WHY’ Boner, with a vengeance.

And it had only happened when the Changeling, who seemed to be taken with the name ‘Scout’, had squeezed into cubicle behind Dappled and in the confusion and the struggle for two Pony-sized creatures to share the one small space, somehow Dappled had ended up with Scout crouched beneath him awkwardly, the Changeling’s small, translucent wings scraping the Stallion’s sides, it’s tail off to the side and that adorable little pouting ass poking his …

*THROB*

“Not. Helping.” Dappled scolded himself for remembering how good the Changeling smelled, like vodka and lemons, and how when he’d pushed her out, he’d seen that same pouting little asshole, and the faintest hint of lime-green lips between her ...

*THROB THROB*

“OH FAUST DAMMIT!” Dappled cursed loudly, banging his head against the cubicle and pointedly ignoring the worried demands from Scout to be allowed back into the cubicle to defend him.

The last thing I need! Getting a boner from a Changeling’s ass! He … She … IT! IT’S AN IT! They change shape, they probably don’t have a set gender anyways! Just like that ‘Mare’ from Baltimare I ran into a few years back, looks like a Mare, but it’s a Stallion under the dress!

“Guard Dappled, are you injured? The Queen will have my head if you have been attacked!”

“No, no, I’m just fine, give me a minute …” Dappled replied, flinching as he heard the lock rattle behind him … and then sighed as he felt himself starting to go flaccid. “Finally! Oh, that’s the ticket …”

A minute and a flush later, Dappled was cleaning his hooves under the tap with an annoyingly clingy Scout asking what he’d fought in the cubicle when his commanding officer walked in.

“Ah … Dappled. Is this a bad time?” The aging Earth Pony asked, his cream coat sprinkled with grey and his once-brown mane and tail faded and streaked with white, said nervously, eying the Changeling that seemed glued to Dappled’s side.

“No sir, just a weird one. Glad to see you have … recovered, sir. I apologise for taking command while you were out of it, but …” Dappled saluted, nearly elbowing Scout in the muzzle, and began to apologise to his C.O., only to be cut off with a wave of the older Stallion’s hoof.

“All things considered, you did exactly what I would have done. When Chrysalis surrendered, any offensive action we took would have been consider heavy-hoofed by our neighbours and probably would have been used for propaganda by the extremist-elements amongst the Gryphons to raise support for another border-skirmish.” Peach Seed sighed, giving the clingy, over-protective Changeling and blushing Stallion an odd look. “Are you sure this isn’t a bad time, Dappled?”

“I do not believe that ‘Scout’ here understands the concept of personal space, that’s all, sir.” Dappled replied, thanking Faust that his ‘Little Warlord’ was playing nice for once. “And Queen Chrysalis has apparently ordered her to protect me … uhm, speaking of which, have you spoken to her, sir?”

“Uhm … yes. And she has asked for some help with her children. So … I need you to play diplomat for me for a while.”

“Dare I ask why, sir?”

“I need to go home, collect my wife and bring her here. The foals are …”

“Wait, sir, Foals? Not grubs?” Dappled asked, blinking rapidly. Foals? They’re not maggots?

“Yes, it surprised me too. Three adorable little foals … and their mother is at a loss over how to care for them, considering Queen Chrysalis claims she only lays eggs.” Peach explained, rubbing at the back of his head in puzzlement. “Sadly, I’ve never been good with foals, not even my own, so I’m off to fetch an expert on the subject. Which leaves you in charge of the Outpost, again.”

“Ah. And what of our three paper-pushers?”

“Currently introducing the Changelings to the wonders of coffee and doughnuts, much to Equestria’s regret.”

“Bwuuuuuh?”

“My sentiments exactly. Apparently caffeine makes Changelings high, and they’ve eaten half our supply of doughnuts and are currently trying to see what eating raw coffee grounds do to themselves.” Peach sighed and shook his head in amazement. “I just passed two of those massive Changelings pulling Chrysalis's carriage scooting along the hallway on their chests, pushing themselves along on their hind-legs.”

“Still doesn’t top the last Christmas party for weird-o-manure though. Very well sir, I’ll accept temporary command until you and your C.O. return.” Dappled replied with a grin, saluting and nearly knocking Scout in the head again with his elbow.

“Hooo boy. Thank you, Private Dappled. Good luck, and here’s hoping nothing else goes sideways until our escort from Canterlot shows up. I can only imagine what the Princesses will make of all this.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sunset Shimmer was peeved.

No, scratch that, she was pissed.

She was finally with her soul-mate, the only other Pony who had ever reached out to her, and this … this old hag was standing in her way, this ‘Nightmoon Lunar’, and Twilight was cowering behind the bigger Princess’s flank.

And now Celestia, that pacifistic limp-hoof, was screaming at her to come out and surrender? What in Tartarus was going on? Why were there three Princesses in a backwater town like this?

“Damn it!” Sunset hissed, trying to lunge forwards to grab Twilight and teleport to safety, but her muzzle hit the opaque shield-barrier, and she shrieked with pain as her skin hissed from the contact. “What the hell kind of spell is this?”

“A divine barrier, Succuponi! One such as yourself cannot cross it, not without destroying yourself.” The big midnight-blue Alicorn hissed, looking at a space over Sunset’s head with a triumphant grin on her face. “Soon, Celestia shall be here, and Twilight will be saved from …”

“From what, you overgrown Mule? Her true destiny? Freedom from Celestia’s wishy-washy leadership? Saved from having to follow some tired old nag’s rules and spend her life serving unworthy Ponies who’ll do nothing but demand everything and give back nothing?” Sunset snapped back, rubbing a metallic, cloven hoof at her burnt muzzle and grinning as she felt the skin smooth over and regrow its soft golden fur, and laughed as she saw the look of smug assurance fell off the black Alicorn’s face. “I am the future, you whorse. And that is my destined lover you’re hoarding, so hoof her over, and I won’t melt your wings off!”

“Destined what? Sunset, what are you talking abou-“ Twilight shouted before the room shook and more trickles of dust spilled down from the roof.

“TWILIGHT? LUNA! GET OUT OF THERE, NOW!” Celestia roared, and everypony felt their coats stand on end as the stairwell on the other side of the room became flooded with painfully bright sunlight.

“Twilight, go get your friends, use your favourite trick. I will grab Trixie, we need to get out of here.” Luna yelled, her mane elongating and turning more ethereal, creeping around the room to curl around a confused-looking Trixie, whose ear-muffs apparently were blocking out all noise.

“B-but the barrier will f-fall if we stop concentrating on it!” Twilight whimpered, flinching as Sunset pressed against the barrier, the furious Succuponi shrieking as the energies burned her flesh, stripping hair and hide away as if they had been splashed with acid.

“Twilight, the last time I saw Celestia this angry, we were sealing Sombra into a Glacier, and she vaporized several square miles of tundra in the process. Teleport to your friends and get them out of the library now!” Luna snapped, wincing as she felt the panicked struggling and screams of the blue Unicorn as her ethereal mane dragged the show-mare into its depths. “I cannot leave until you do, and Celestia will have to cast the binding spell soon, even if we are still in here …”

“Teleport! TELEPORT! Nraghrgh! Why won’t it work!” Sunset snarled, her horn flickering with magic, her body glowing not only with her own magic, but pulsing sparkles of golden sunlight, but she remained stuck where she was. “What is that whorse doing to me?”

“O-oh-kay.” Twilight nodded, giving Luna’s rear one last pat, which drove Sunset into an even greater frenzy to penetrate the barrier, abandoning her futile attempts to teleport, Twilight’s horn flaring with power as she concentrated … and vanished in a flash of purple magic, teleporting away to the upper levels of the library, her shield-spell fading away without her concentrating on it.

“NO! GIVE MY TWILIGHT BACK!” Sunset screamed furiously, leaping for Luna even with her forelimbs and face covered with burns and gaping holes in her hide, only for Luna to fade into a Pony-sized mass of night-sky and flow around the Succuponi and up the stairwell.

“GIVE ME BACK MY TWILIGHT, YOU WHORSES!”

Chapter 44 (MAXIMUM CLOP)

CHAPTER 44

“Sweetie Belle …”

“No … no … no! I cast the spell right! Exactly right! WHY DID THIS HAPPEN?”

“This isn’t a spear, IT’S A PENIS!”

All three Crusaders looked down at their loins, eyes wide with shock, although in the case of the white-coated Unicorn, horror as well, where black-furred sheaths, fat and soft, had appeared, and were rapidly peeling back as thick pinks shafts with flared heads began to push out of them.

“Maybe … maybe we messed up? The itchy feelin’ we all got, maybe that made the spell mess up?” Applebloom offered, tentatively poking the strange thing growing out of her, and shuddered as the sensation of her own hoof made the shaft pulse … and her already-sore marehood pulse and wink with renewed vigor. “But where’s the rest of it? You know, the round bits at the back, like in the pictures in the biology books?”

“Wooooooooooooow this is aweeeeeeeeeeeesome!” Both Sweetie and Applebloom turned to stare at Scootaloo, who had rolled onto her back, one hoof massaging the cleft between her hind legs, the other rubbing up and down the new shaft that had grown just in-front of it, her eyes going crossed and her tongue hanging out the side of her mouth. “No wonder Snips and Snails do this all the time!”

“No, its not awesome at all! This can’t be … Rarity will kill me!” Sweetie whimpered, even as her eyes became fixated on Scoot’s rapidly moving hooves and the twitching flesh beneath them. “She … she always says Stallion-parts leave a mess behind, and Rarity hates messes! She’ll never let me back into the boutique if I have this!”

“Yeah, but maybe this is what we … need? With this stupid feeling we’ve all got?” The farm-pony whispered to her friend, shuffling over to hug her friend, whose expression was on of absolute horror as she probably imagined Rarity’s outrage, Applebloom wrapping her hooves around the trembling unicorn, who trembled and then hugged her earth-pony friend back for precious seconds before both Crusaders flinched, squeaked and looked down between them.

The newly-sprouted shafts lay sandwiched between them throbbed and twitched, dollops of cloudy fluid dribbling from the holes in the heads, the shafts rubbing against each other between soft belly-fur and the warm, sticky fluid that was slowly coating them.

“Aw heck.”

“Oh … that’s kinda …”

Flustered, Applebloom looked away to the side, flushing heavily and caught sight of Scootaloo masturbating furiously, hips thrusting into the air and her hooves almost blurs of orange-hued movement, an image that did little to settle her nerves or cause her new limb to calm down.

“Uhm, ‘Bloom?” Sweetie Belle’s breath came hot agains the side of Applebloom’s face, and the white-coated Unicorn moved softly, causing the newly grown, and highly sensitive, organs to grind against one another, making both Crusaders moan softly for several heartbeats. “I-I’m still itchy, and you’ve got a … scratcher. So c-c-co-could we …”

“Sweetie, ah wanna, but what if ah knock you up? You remember Miss Cherilee’s warnin’ about letting the boys do that to us when we’re in estrus, right? An’ this feels a lot like last spring …”

“Uhm, Rarity gave me the talk too, but she said it should be fine if they pull out before they shoot.” Sweetie whispered back, humping against Applebloom with short, swift movements that dragged their new organs against each other in delicious bursts of slick friction. “A-and I think I can swipe some pills from Rarity’s bedroom i-if you can’t pull out in time.”

“D’you think you can get me some of them pills too?” Applebloom asked, pulling away from Sweetie Belle slightly to push a hoof down between them, separating their sticky shafts and awkwardly pushing them down to slide between their hind legs, the pink shafts crossing just before the rolled-back sheaths at their bases, the hot flesh throbbing against their wet folds. “Ah kinda wanna try it too, y’know?”

“This is so weird …” Sweetie whispered again as the two Crusaders began to softly buck against each other, awkwardly standing on their hind legs and holding each other with their front ones as they rubbed their shafts against their folds, each thrust slightly harder and more desperate than the last as the new, strange sensations thrilled them beyond anything they had felt that night, and the strange, itchy craving that plagued them still pushed rational thought to the background, until a particularly heavy thrust caused both ponies to pull back, and then push against each other at just the right angle …

“Whoooo!” Sweetie and Applebloom both let out a shocked breath as they felt the other’s folds part around the flared heads of their shafts, a wonderful silken tightness, warmer than anything they every thought another Pony’s body could be, their legs trembling as the two loosened their grip on each other enough to stare at the heated space between them, where the two pink shafts had crossed over each other and entered their dripping folds.

“Oh mah gawdess.” The farm-pony gasped, shuddering as she pulled back slightly, then pressed forwards against, earning a estatic mewl from her partner as the two shafts ground against one another, and they pushed just a little deeper inside each other, the flared heads pushing against all sorts of interesting spots. “Sweetie, whatever you’re doin’, you stop an’ ah’ll never forgive you!”

Sweetie’s response was a low, animal moan as she pulled back in time with Applebloom’s own withdrawl, the flared heads almost popping out before she thrust back vigorously, the two Ponies yelling out loud in delight and surprise as they buried themselves in each other as deep as they would go, the bases of their shafts turning from pink to red from the sudden pressure as flared heads tapped against pulsing cervixes, the two locked together for several heartbeats, eyes wide open in shock and staring into each other’s faces, mouths flapping open as they lost all sense of the world around them, lost in the sensation of the hot, silken depths that gripped and pulsed around their new organs.

Another thrust, then another, and another, Applebloom found herself unable to count as she and her friend thrust wildly into each other, lost to the sensations of being both penetrated and penetrating, unable to handle the influx of new, strange pleasure as they loudly cried out in wordless passion, the twinge of discomfort from the compressed bases of the shafts all but lost in the maelstrom of other sensations until Applebloom felt Sweetie Belle swell inside her, the flare growing almost painfully large, and half-lost in the her heated state, Applebloom remembered that a male Pony ‘flared’ only when they were about to climax!

“Sweetie, y-you gotta puuhmph!” Her cry was lost as the lust-addled Unicorn in her hooves lunged forwards for a kiss, the two inexperienced young Ponies duelling awkwardly with tongues as their hips pistoned against each other, and Applebloom’s worries were lost in a building pressure within her own loins, a increasing tightness that had more to do with her own shaft swelling than the wild, erratic contractions of her partner’s inner depths, her growing flare snagging on the bumps and folds within Sweetie Belle as the young Unicorn began to cry out wordlessly, and a wet, glorious heat, even more intense and delicious than what she was already experiencing, blasted into Applebloom’s body, a pulsing wetness that made her body quake and the tightness in her lower belly explode, a line of impossibly pleasurable fire shooting up through her shaft and causing Sweetie Belle’s insides to become even slicker and wetter.

Moaning into each other’s mouths, the two Crusader’s thrust into each other again and again, the surge of hot juices from their new additions only subsiding after several more thrusts, the two pulling apart as much from exhaustion and surprise, their shafts popping out with paired, loud schlick noises as the two fell apart and onto their backsides, a final, victorious spurt from each of their shafts flying through the air and splattering onto the wooden floorboards between them as the two Crusaders gasped for air, bodies quivering with the aftershocks of their orgasms. Both orgasms.

“Applebloom?” Sweetie whispered after almost a minute, blushing heavily and grinning madly.

“Y-yeah, sugar?” Applebloom replied, flushing as much from seeing the slow ooze of off-white coming from between Sweetie’s hind-legs, and the warm wetness sliding out of her in turn as the term of affection she had just used, and laid down on the cool floorboards, unable to maintain direct eye-contact as her concerns about tomorrow came flooding back to her.

“I think I really like messy things. Like, really really like them.” The young Unicorn giggled, putting a hoof between her hind-legs and massaging the red, puffy lips there, her shaft twitching and hardening as she did so.

“That! Was! Awesome!” If she wasn’t exhausted from a long night of no sleeping and hard rutting with her friends, Applebloom might have jumped in surprise as Scootaloo bounced over Applebloom’s prone form, her shaft drooling a thick strand of white fluid that, from her new position, the young farm-pony could tell came from the distressingly large pile of thick cum on the floorboards just a few steps away from where she and Sweetie had just been ‘active’. “Me next, me next!”

“What about … the counter-spell?” Applebloom asked futilely as Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle began to excitedly talk about how to best use their new ‘spears’, and how they were going to become ‘Cutiemark Crusader Spear Maidens’.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Twilight, is there a store that sells food late at night in Ponyville?” Luna whispered, looking at the distressingly low level of butternut pumpkin soup in the cauldron, and the gaggle of ravenous Pegasus Royal Guards eagerly drinking bowl after bowl of the hearty soup scattered around the library, the hungry Stallions having already dismembered all of the bread, fruit and vegetables in Twilight’s pantry with their first and second servings.

“Uhm … yeah. Filthy Rich’s Bargain Emporium is open all-day everyday, but after what happened with Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, I think he might be a little sour if we were to walk in and buy food for the Royal Guards after all the bad publicity his little filly has caused him today by biting those other Guards.” Twilight whispered back, looking at the empty shelves in her pantry in dismay before walking over to the fridge and sighing at the equally-bare innards of the cold-box. “That said, it’s the Bargain Emporium, or we fly out to Applejack’s farm, make off with a barrel or two of apples and leave them an I.O.U. note.”

The two Alicorns craned their heads around the corner of the small, cramped kitchen of the library and frowned in unison as Spike, grumbling heavily from a lack of sleep and the noise of the Pegasus Guards talking to one another at four in the morning, staggered over towards them and the kitchen with another tray piled high with empty bowls.

“Okay, yeah, the Bargain Emporium it is. I think they’ll start eating my books if we have to go all the way out to Applejack’s farm to borrow some food.” The purple princess muttered darkly as she glared at the back of a Pegasi who put a dog-ear in one of her fiction novels, while another had turned a collection of self-help books into a crude seat to join his friends sprawling across the couches. “Uh, Luna, I hate to ask, but I don’t suppose you have any bits on you? I kind of won’t get paid by the Ponyville Council until the end of next week, the bank won’t be open till about nine in the morning, and I’ve only got about a dozen bits on hoof right now…”

Luna turned and gave Twilight one of those bug-eyed looks that the young Alicorn was becoming to grow accustomed to more and more, mouth working silently before she finally managed to croak out the words.

“Twilight, dearest, are you telling me that a Princess of the Realm does not have access to the Royal Treasury? Thou must … you must rely upon a ‘wage’ to buy your daily bread?”

“Yes, of course! I earn my keep on my own four hooves as the librarian of Ponyville, but the excess bits I get from my stipend as Celestia’s student, as well as the rewards from our adventures, goes right back into expanding the library’s stock and replacing damaged books. And my experiments. And Spike’s dietary requirements.” Twilight gave a sad laugh, rubbing at the back of her head with a hoof. “Gemstones aren’t cheap, after all, and I have to get them imported from Canterlot directly with Princess Celestia’s royal seal or I have to pay a huge amount of tax on them that would make it impossible for me to pay for them normally. And Spike literally goes through a barrel’s worth of gems every week, like they’re candy!”

“You cut off my gems, I start talking to the press about where you stash your diaries.” The young Drake in question warned as he wobbled into the kitchen under the load of soup-bowls, decidedly unimpressed with both the early start to his day and the tone of Twilight and Luna’s conversation by the sound of it, given that his face was obscured behind the pile.

“YOU WOULDN’T!” The purple princess thundered, and was completely ignored by the young Drake as he staggered past them with his heavy load.

“Canterlot Commonwealth News, first page, Twilight’s private diary. Dear Diary, today I learned that one cannot rush things. Not friendship, not the seasons, and no dangerous magical experiments that swap my poor mistreated, underpaid, overworked assistant’s gender for the other one for an entire week. Next time, less shredded mandrake root, more black lotus extract.” Spike muttered loudly as he deposited the tray on the kitchen sink, then climbed up after it to stare into the cauldron and grimace at how little of the soup remained. “Or I could tell them about the time you ‘accidentally’ set the whole town off on an obsessive rampage over your Smarty Pants doll. Or the time when you tried to help Pinkie Pie make some marshmallows and the whole town got terrorized by an angry Marshmallow Mare the size of Applejack’s barn?”

“You … you know, I think I actually still have those proton-packs somewhere in the basement …” Twilight muttered, giving Luna the stink eye when she finally noticed her assistant and her girlfriend giggling madly at her. “Okay, so maybe I’ve made mistakes. A lot of them, truth be told. But the last thing I need, Spike, is to have those horrid Ponies in Canterlot writing all sorts of lies about me with your help! They have plenty of made-up horrors to print without you giving them any more dirt on me!”

“Sir Spike, I think your teasing goes too far.” Luna chimed in, giving the young drake a playful swat across the back of the head with a wing. “Still … it would behoove the realm for you to perhaps share the contents of those diaries with the other Princesses. Just to be safe.”

“NO! Its private, they are private, you can’t read them, nopony can!” Half-laughing, half-protesting, Twilight chased Luna around the kitchen and out into the library, dodging around and jumping over the surprised Pegasus guards as the Lunar Princess led her young partner out into the night, leaving the Guards giving Spike startled looks begging for explanation.

“Come, Twilight! To this ‘Bargain Emperor’ to feed our starving Royal Guards!”

“Luna, its Bargain Emporium, and not until you promise to stay away from my diaries!”

“Nay!”

“LUNA!”

“You wish for my secrets and history, you must give up something in turn, Twilight!” Giggling, Luna half-jumped, half-flapped away from the fuming Alicorn behind her, blowing a raspberry at her girlfriend as Twilight grumbled about fully-ascended Alicorns and their ability to function all day without sleep. “Now come, Twilight, we shall procure some food, make sure the Royal Guards are fortified for their trip back to Canterlot and then …”

“And then we hope the Royal Agents actually show up for once. And if that happy event actually happens, I am closing the library for a day and knocking myself out for the next sixteen hours or until the next earth-shattering disaster blows up in my face.” Disappearing in a flash of purple light, Twilight teleported directly in-front of Luna, who felt herself pushed back slightly by ...something as Twilight re-appeared before her. “Luna, we may want to disguise ourselves before we enter Mr Rich’s store. His daughter did cause a debacle today and he might be slightly upset with us. Diamond Tiara is a spoiled little girl and has her father wrapped around her hoof, so he might take offense at us being in his store. He does have the right to refuse service to patrons.”

“Nay, Twilight, we shall not. This merchant is one of our subjects, and our laws are both fair and clear: His child harmed a Royal Guard while refusing to obey a Royal Edict to clear a battlefield and thus will be punished, as a minor, under those laws. Should he have any complaints, he should have perhaps taken steps to ensure Diamond Tiara took more after himself than his wife.”

“That … that sounds a little off, Luna. I mean, I know Diamond Tiara is a pain in the plot at times, and Spoiled Rich is a bit of a, well, she’s a total bitch …”

“I have seen Diamond Tiara's dreams, Twilight. Her true self, stripped bare, is a vain, small-minded, petty little monster obsessed with being adored and worshipped by those around her and a desperate fear of her own mother that makes my skin crawl just thinking about that little filly. My oath as a Dreamwalker prevents me from explaining the true nature of her home-life, but I can say that we have marked Diamond Tiara as a Pony in need of being saved from herself, and hopefully the mind healers, errrr, ‘therapists’ that we have mentioned her situation to will be able to heal her mind once Diamond Tiara finally accepts that she truly does need help.” Luna’s smile faded and the Lunar Monarch shot a look towards her beloved night sky as she trotted forwards and wrapped a wing around Twilight, pulling her close as the two Alicorns headed towards Filthy Rich’s store. “Speaking of which, perhaps my time in Ponyville might be best spent giving Spoiled Rich a piece of my mind, in person and with the power of an unrestricted Royal Canterlot Voice for emphasis. Whatever pull she may have with the local authorities that stymies our efforts to help her daughter will not hold up against a direct approach from a Princess!”

“Luna? You are far too worked up for this just to be dislike for a Pony whose temperament is in need of a good dose of reality.” Twilight asked after her lover’s diatribe made the purple Alicorn’s ears lie flat. It was the first time, outside of the Nobles of Canterlot, that Twilight had ever seen Luna so angry.

“I … when I first started my Dreamwalker duties again, I focused heavily on Ponyville, at my sister’s request. No doubt she hoped the kind souls in this town would help me feel more at ease after a thousand years of stewing in my own guilt and the twisted embrace of the Nightmare Spirit. Naturally, I focused upon you and your friends at first, and once I had confidence in my abilities again I branched out into the dreams of the other Ponies in Ponyville, the Rich family were one of the first whom I visited since I wished to see the dreams of what I assumed was a happy family.” Much more quietly now, Luna kept on talking as the two Alicorns threaded their way through town towards the Bargarin Emporium. “Filthy Rich is a very good-natured pony, albeit one with ambition and a willingness to step over others if that is what it takes to succeed, traits that are not necessarily evil or negative when balanced with empathy and a desire to help those less fortunate than oneself, traits in which he has in abundance. His wife Spoiled Rich, however, takes a great amount of pride and pleasure in being one of the dominant forces in Ponyville’s social circles, and has reinforced her dominion over the years by driving potential rivals out of the town or demonizing them through her circle of sycophants.”

“But as soon as you appeared, Celestia’s own pupil and the ‘vanquisher’ of Nightmare Moon, her position as the defacto Queen of this little town disappeared like a sand-castle before a tornado. The fact that you have also taken the Cutiemark Crusaders under your wing for special tutoring and refused to offer similar treatment to her own child has, to Spoiled Rich’s twisted way of thinking, marked you a personal enemy of hers. I fear that while Filthy Rich might be willing to work with us, his wife will be using all her pull in this community to cause as much trouble and petty grievances as she can without exposing her intentions directly to us.”

“I do recall a few motions at the local council meetings for by-laws preventing me from casting spells or using the Elements of Harmony inside the town limits cropping up, but they always got voted down and nobody would ever say who put the motions forward at the closed meetings when I asked.” Leaning against Luna as much out of fatigue as a need for warmth and emotional comfort, Twilight turned her eyes to the neon sign above the double-doors of Filthy Rich’s store, frowning heavily as she mentally digested Luna’s words, and the thought that somepony in her beloved town would hold such hatred towards her for no real reason. “I mean, there’s always been a few Ponies who never liked me in town, mostly the older Earth Ponies who want everything done with hooves alone, no magic, but nopony has ever come up and outright said they don’t like me or want me in town to my face.”

“You will find bigotry everywhere you go, Twilight, like slugs on the underside of a rock. My sister combats it with teachings of understanding and empathy because most beings who hold to such specist or tribal beliefs do so out of ignorance and fear, and once they learn the truth, such beliefs are quickly abandoned.” Luna whispered as the two Alicorns walked into the store, all but abandoned but for one checkout where a brown-coated Stallion appeared to be sleeping with his back to them, slumped over the bench with his head on his hooves. “There will always be a hoof-ful, however, who refuse to let go of their hatred no matter what we do or say, Twilight. They will cling to their hateful creeds and dogma until the end of their days, and our only real way to fight them is to prove them wrong at every turn, so society itself becomes immune to their poison.”

“The Bloody Horn Rebellion … you mentioning that the Hearthwarming legend is a story … exactly how bad were we, Luna? The Tribes, I mean?” Whispering still to allow the poor pony left on the late-shift to sleep for as long as they could, the two Alicorns each levitated a pair of trolleys out of the storage bays and pushed them down the aisles with their magic, levitating in whatever suited their individual tastes with a soft rattle of the metal frames of the trolleys as they meandered through the store.

“In a word? Nightmarish. Together, Celestia and I turned the Three Tribes from mutual genocide, but it was a near thing, Twilight. A very, very near thing. Only a few thousand of each Tribe survived the trek across the Dragonspine Mountains, and their blood-feuds, as well as the attrition they suffered fighting the native species of this part of the world and the deadly effect of the Windigoes dropped their numbers even further. It took the better part of two hundred years after the Tribes agreed to the peace treaty and settled down before we were certain that there were enough Ponies left in the world to maintain a healthy breeding pool, and even then it took another five hundred years before the last holdouts started to give up their Tribalist ways …”

“And then we had the Lust War, where the Succuponies came into existence?”

“Yes. Just a over seven hundred years after the Three Tribes came to Equestria, the Coven rose to power and started the Lust War, which raged for over a decade before my sister and I finally singled out the magical frequency required to turn their hellish power back upon itself and use their connection to Tartarus to draw the entire debased race into a prison demi-plane where they could be contained until the end of time.” Luna said softly as the two turned into another aisle, her eyes widening as she caught sight of the ‘products’ on display. “Salty plums in fermented juice? Yes please!”

“Ick, I know my brother and Cadence loves those things, but salt and plums do not belong together! And don’t dodge the subject!”

“I’m not, I’m not, its just … salty plums!” Sticking her tongue out, Luna noisily levitated an entire shelf’s worth into one of her trolleys, ignoring Twilight’s look of disgust. “Between the Lust Wars and my own … mistake two thousand years later, we also had to deal with the fallout of the Succuponi curse on our people, then a hundred years after the Lust Wars came the Crystal Crusade, when King Sombra … came into being and enslaved the Crystal Ponies and tried to march south to conquer the rest of the continent, the King of Shadows taking particular pains to kill every Unicorn his army encountered along the way in revenge for what they had done to him and his Earth Pony family.”

“Then we had our first real encounter with the Minotaurs of Labrynthia a few decades after we sealed Sombra away and lost the Crystal Empire to his curse, an encounter which we only just stopped from turning into a full-fledged war because of the warmongering of the Pegasi’s leaders at the time, as well as constant troubles with the Diamond Dog packs and Buffalo Herds running afoul of Earth Pony settlers who refused to acknowledge the rights of the people whose lands they were encroaching upon.” The Lunar Monarch continued as they slowly worked their way down the aisle, swatting a wing through a cloud of telekinesis from Twilight when the younger Alicorn tried to levitate a batch of salty plums back onto the shelf. “And then towards the middle of Celestia’s fourth millennium, we had our first real trouble with the Gryphons, and even then there were factions within our little Ponies who kept on agitating against each other, and us, based on tribal lines when our attention turned towards our borders once more. I will say, however, that despite every outburst of bigotry and close-minded xenophobia our little Ponies suffer from, Equestria has advanced far from when I lost myself to the Nightmare.”

“Really? From what you’re saying, it seems like we keep backsliding into barbarism the moment something goes wrong!” The purple Alicorn said, feeling sick to her stomach at the words of the other Princess. Are we really so … so horrible and troublesome? I always thought Ponies were amongst the most noble creatures on the planet! I mean, sure, we’ve got our share of bigots and trouble-makers, but overall, aren’t we a good people?

“Twilight, I have witnessed foals bashing each other’s heads in with rocks as their mothers died with their teeth in each other’s necks, fighting over nearly-empty sacks of moldy, rotten hay even the most desperate Pony of today’s era wouldn’t touch. I’ve seen armies slaughter each other to the last Stallion because one Noble couldn’t keep their hooves or genitals away from another’s wife.” Luna pointed out as they rounded the aisle and turned into another. “Believe me when I say the bigotry I see today is as a pleasant summer rain to the horrors I have endured in the past. That does not mean I will not stand against it everywhere I find it, but the fact that many Ponies today actively champion the cause of equality, not just between the Tribes, but between the different races that inhabit our world fills my heart with such joy I fear at times it may burst. The changes this world, our nation, has embraced gives me hope that the lessons we have been trying to impart for so long have finally taken root, and deeply at that, in the hearts and minds of our little Ponies.”

“It has taken a little over three thousand years, and that includes the thousand that I have been banished for, and more bloodshed than I care to remember, but Twilight, Celestia and I have finally helped Ponykind see that labels and differences, both physical and otherwise, are not something to be used to divide or segregate oneself from the rest of one’s people, but rather celebrations of an individual within a community, a symbol that we can pursue what and who we are in a healthy and wholesome way. I can only imagine what the Ponies of Equestria will achieve in the next millennium with four Princesses helping them overcome their natures!”

“…You make it sound like we’re evil.” The words came out of Twilight barely audible, but Luna’s ears flattened and the happy smile on her face flickered away in a heartbeat.

“Twilight … everypony, no everything is … selfish, not evil. It is how we survived before intellect over-ruled instinct, how the strong endured to sire the next generation in a world of predators, diseases and natural disasters. Before the rise of civilisation, there could be no room for pity, no strength to spare to protect the weak. If you did not rise above and conquer your rivals, death was likely your fate.” The Lunar Monarch explained softly as they walked slowly down the aisle, just pushing their trolleys now. “Such natures helped our ancestors survive, even thrive, and the legacy of those instincts, that drive for us to fight, to win, against the rival or that which was different and alien helped us rise above our ancient competitors and become tool-users and magic-wielders.”

“But now that our society has reached a level where every moment of the day need not be spent searching for food or preparing for battle, now we’re free to change our natures. It took thousands upon thousands of years for us to reach this level, and as such it will take thousands of years yet for us to learn to safely and healthily integrate those same instincts into our society in such a fashion that our drive to succeed and expand does not come at the cost of supressing and oppressing each other.”

“And that’s why Princess Celestia does what she does? Altering history so Ponies don’t backslide into tribal warfare?”

“Well, yes, but not only for the Ponies. Obscuring threats like Sombra from the public records helped prevent groups like the Shadow Council or even rival nations from seeking out these ancient threats in idiotic attempts to secure an alliance or claim that power for their own. Much of our history remains unchanged, of course, to help keep questions about historical inaccuracies to a minimum, but the Royal Archivist and Royal Librarian are both aware of the alterations to history, and are bound by blood-oaths to preserve the true history in a secret wing in Canterlot Castle, as well as seek out those who are digging into the past and guage their intent and purpose.”

“It’s all so … big. I can scarcely wrap my head around the concept, that Princess Celestia has manipulated the history of the entire world …”

“Not just Celestia, Twilight. Many of the Immortals have lent their aid, as did mortals who also could see the danger, of later generations who had only heard of the romanticized legends and would have no experience with the horrific reality. Thousands of individuals have helped in this goal over the millenia, and for the most part, it has worked exactly as intended.”

“No-pony went to where the Crystal Empire once stood or attempted to recolonize the area and risk disaster when the Crystal Empire would reappear, in-part thanks to the Lord of Winter keeping the region blanketed in snow for thousands of years and the Chromatic Queen stationing several families of her White Dragons in the region to scare off possible settlers. Thanks to Celestia’s and my efforts, all texts that could help a sufficiently powerful sorcerer to access the powers of Tartarus are destroyed or kept under the the tightest of security in the heart of Labrynthia under the vigilant guard of the Priesthood of the Everburning Lord and the agents of the Platinum King. I could go on, but we would be here all day.” Luna grabbed another shelf’s worth of treats and noisily piled them into the trolleys she controlled, large round tins of Zap-Apple Jam tarts and gave a small chuckle as Twilight emptied the shelf below that of the same treats with a guilty expression on her face. “I can remember how much it burns to know that just beyond the edge of your understanding, a greater truth lurks, but trust us, Twilight. Trust in me, Celestia, your sister-in-law and the other Immortals. We truly do have the best wishes for this world, and all the peoples that dwell upon it, it is just that fate and the whims of selfish individuals have forced us to use such roundabout methods to achieve that goal.”

“I believe you, Luna. I believe in you, and in Princess Celestia. I’m just so conflicted over everything I’ve learned today, from Innate Magic and Ponyville being the home-base of the laziest Royal Agents in Equestria to Succuponies being real and now Celestia is the grand-high editor of history.” Twilight paused and rubbed at the inside of a foreleg with the other, gnawing on her bottom lip as she thought of her next words. “I just … need time to process all of this, to settle my thoughts.”

“Time you shall have later today, Twilight.” Luna promised, reaching out with a wing to brush Twilight’s mane affectionately. “I promise, I shall ensure that after we have seen to the Royal Agents, you shall sleep deeply and soundly, without nightmares, and give your subconscious a chance to help your mind calm itself.”

“Thanks, Luna. I guess … this ought to do for the Royal Guards?” Twilight sighed and leaned into the touch, before looking down at their now-heavily loaded trolleys.

“Goodness no, Twilight. I’m shopping for myself.” The dusky-blue Alicorn tittered, dancing away as Twilight attempted to swat at her with a shorter, stubbier purple wing. “Once I purchase these and store them in my portable hole, I’ll buy something else for our stalwart Royal Guards.”

“Wait … are you going to make me pay for all of this?” Twilight squeaked in horror, eyes widening as she took a second glance at the pile of food in her trolleys. “M-my wage won’t cover thi-.”

Ducking in close, Luna put a hoof over Twilight’s mouth to stall her panic-attack, and put her muzzle close to Twilight’s ear, her breath hot and sweet against the smaller Alicorn’s sensitive skin.

“Oh, no no no, Twilight. I will buy all we need tonight, of course, but I shall expect to be ‘paid back’ the next time we are in the shower together …”

Blushing fiercely, Twilight’s mouth opened, either to protest or offer a counter-proposal, when a loud cough made the two Princesses flinch away from each other and then bounce off the tall aisles of produce, their heads whipping around to the source.

The brown Pony they had seen before at the checkouts was staring at them with a bemused expression, and now they could see his face …

“Your Majesties.” Filthy Rich said, bowing deeply with a tired smile on his face. “We need to talk.”

Chapter 58 (Warning, the contents of this chapter may be disturbing to some readers)

CHAPTER 58

“More ice, Twilight?”

“Mmmngh.”

“I’ll take that as a ‘yes’ then.”

Spike took one look at the scene before him and made a gagging noise before disappearing to the safety of his ‘cavern of solitude and manliness’, aka the basement, as Luna lifted a bag of ice, by hoof because, to both Alicorns' dismay, while under the effects of the world’s worst hangover, the effects of the Sympathy between Luna and Twilight rebounded on a minor level.

From what little they had managed to figure out, the return of the Sympathy had something to do with the two Princesses’s physical proximity, Twilight’s physical distress and Luna’s concern for Twilight’s well-being somehow causing the Sympathy to take effect, if at a very weak version of the effects that had caused them so much trouble in the Everfree Forest. Unfortunately, Luna was hardly able to use magic to do anything without receiving the tail-end of Twilight’s physical condition, and Twilight was too sick and miserable to want to study the curiousity.

“Princess Luna, is Mistress Twilight okay?” Trixie asked in a stage-whisper, trotting up to Luna’s side with some buttered oat-bread for Twilight to eat, after her first battle with the bottle had evicted everything she’d eaten that day, or as Twilight claimed, “Everything I’ve ever eaten ever, and I’ve never even looked at diced carrot in my life, where in tartarus did it come from, oh Faust here it comes agai-waaaaaaaalph”.

“Mmm, that’s … no, but so long as Twilight keeps up her fluids and stays still, she should be fine tomorrow morning. That said … Twilight? How are you feeling? I don’t dare cast a spell incase … you know.” Luna gave the contrite blue ex-magician at her side an annoyed look before sighing and turning her attention back to Twilight. She couldn’t very well explain about the Sympathy with a potential Succubi just lounging around the house, especially one who was obviously fixated on Twilight romantically, however one-sided.

“Terrible. Nuh drinking ‘gain. Ever.” Twilight whimpered, holding a hoof to the ice-bag on her head and trying to smush it down over her eyes. “Tell ‘Lestia to turn th’ sun off. S’bright.”

“Twilight, we’re indoors, and the ‘sun’ is a candle that Sir Spike kindly brought in so I could tend to you without having to rely on magic. It’s nearly midnight and you’ve been asleep for several hours. You should not be this sick from just a few bottles of alcohol.”

“G’na make booze ihl’gal when m’phrichesh.”

“Like hell.” Luna and Trixie muttered at once, each giving the other a surprised look before Trixie ducked her head and slunk back to the kitchen.

“Trixie, go to bed.” Luna forced the words out, grimacing at how … harsh she sounded. It wasn’t Trixie’s fault that everything had gone wrong over the past week, but right now Luna didn’t want to have to explain why she couldn’t just magic away Twilight’s pain with a healing spell, and Faust forbid a potential Succuponi so much as touch Twilight in her current, vulnerable situation.

I didn’t even think about what was waiting for us back home! Mother Earth forgive me, I am truly a moon-calf sometimes. Trixie’s obsession with Twilight is painfully obvious, and here I am, getting Twilight plastered till she is too sick to move, and now the Sympathy rears its ugly head again!

“Trixie can still serve …” The blue unicorn protested, spinning in place to face Luna and flinching when she saw Luna’s expression.

“Trixie Căutător Lulamoon, I am an Elder Alicorn and have no need of sleep other than as a luxury. You are mortal, you are partially transformed into a Succuponi and I will not leave Twilight alone in your care, if only for the infinitesimal chance that you might accidentally corrupt Twilight by accident.” Luna glared at the smaller blue Unicorn, who bowed her head, in exhaustion, shame or acknowledgement of Luna’s position, the Alicorn didn’t particularly care which at this stage. “I am aware of, and can understand on a very personal level, your desire to redeem yourself in Twilight’s eyes, if not the rest of Ponyville, for your previous actions. However, I simply cannot risk the chance you could accidentally taint Twilight. Rest, and ready yourself for whatever insanity tomorrow decides to throw at us.”

It was ... painful to watch Trixie slink up the stairs, sneaking a sad, longing look at Twilight as she did so, but every time she took a step, Trixie’s new tail swished back and forth, and memories from when Luna had last seen such things on Ponies came flooding back to her ...

... the field was stained, not red like the poets would claim, but black. Gore caked the dirt, the rocks, the few trees that hadn’t been cut down for firewood or to build crude fortifications, or just been shredded by the back-and-forth of magical artillery that still shook the land.

Overhead, Pegasi wheeled and danced through the air, their innate magic causing the sky to light up with lightning bolts, while their opponents, Succuponies and bewitched Pegasi, threw back javelins and bolts of bile-green flame, the sky dark not with clouds, but smoke from the fires, both magical and mundane, that claimed the corpse-piles and villages around Darkholde.

All around Luna, the dead and the dying lay in horrific repose, the Succuponies loathesomely still alive despite being cut into pieces by her crescent blades, but sadly many more of her opponents had been mortal Ponies, victims of the Succuponies hunger for essence and life-energy, charmed into obsessively worshipping their ‘mistresses’. In time even the unnatural vitality of the Succuponies would succumb to blood-loss and shock, but until then, Luna’s blades dipped and fell with horrific regularity, their silvery sheen dulled with the blood of demon and their victims alike as she sent the enemy of Equestria to their final judgement before Death herself.

Across the battlefield, Celestia used far more blunt methods to drive back the Succuponies and their minions. Balls of solar plasma, gathered from the sun itself and held in check only by Celestia’s will, roared across the ground, not so much burning as vaporizing anything unfortunate to come into contact with them, and for yards around the orbs, each no bigger than a Pony themselves, the land blackened and burned, rocks melted and Ponies and Succuponi alike were cooked alive in their own skins as Luna’s sister stalked towards Darkholde, her face a terrifying rictus of anger and sorrow, tears of molten fire streaming down her face and her mane and tail a brilliant, furious battle between orange and red as the Succuponies that had threatened to break through the blockade were sent screaming back to Darkholde.

Once, the Succuponies had crowed about how the ‘pacifist’ princess would be unable to stop them with bewitched mortals as living shields to hide behind. And it had worked, for a few weeks at least, before Celestia had realized the plague the Succuponies represented could not be cured by any known method, and then when a kill-order for any bewitched Pony had been given, the fight had nearly been over on the spot, with hundreds of Succuponies falling in a blind panic as the armies of Equestria opened fire on their minions, and then them, in a bloody display that Luna still found haunting the dreams of many of the Equestrian soldiers.

In a single, bloody swing, the Princesses of Equestria had killed most of the Succuponies … and thousands of their own people. A bloody, phyrric victory that not even the most hardened Pony had felt like celebrating.

Celestia and Luna had ordered the soldiers to keep back as they piled the bodies of the mortals and burned them, and then ordered the Magi to exercise every test they could safely perform on the dead and crippled Succuponies left behind after the barrage to find some way to counter the Succuponies’ curse, or at least find a way to prevent future victims of their evil.

After that dark day, the Succuponies had retreated back to their fortress, an abandoned keep from the Age of Wandering when the Pony Warlords that had invaded the continent centuries ago and built themselves potent fortresses to continue their genocidal conflict in the new land, and the Princesses had set about containing the mortal fiends until such time as a more permanent, and hopefully less bloody, method for dealing with them could be devised.

Back and forth, Celestia and Luna swooped across the landscape, pushing back the Demons and their mortal puppets until the blockade was restored and the Magi could replace the flawed crystals that had created the weakness in the barrier around Darkholde in the first place. As a final act of vengeance, Celestia flung her orbs of plasma at Darkholde itself, the Coven, the original Succuponies, flaring their might, stolen from thousands of Ponies and the pits of Tartarus itself, to counter the raw power flung at them.

Sadly, even after months of conflict, the Coven had yet to truly learn the difference between a powerful sorcerer and an Immortal. The balls impacted on the shields, shields that would have held off a barrage of fireballs with ease, and shattered them, exploding at they did and bathing the black stone of the fortress in fire so hot the stone melted and ran like wax, and the screaming of the denizens inside the fortress reached even to the blockade itself as the air ignited around the grim towers of the fortress and molten stone poured down on the beings inside Darkholde’s tall, battle-scarred walls.

Yet direct combat with the Coven itself was the only thing that could stop the war, hopefully resulting in either slaying the three original Succuponies or banishing them to Tartarus where they could be kept contained and secure until the end of time, and to further complicate matters, the Coven boasted they possessed the ability to directly convert even Celestia herself. While the claim was dubious, pressure from the Parliment of Immortals had forced Celestia and Luna to this long, grinding war, rather than the off-chance that the Succuponies could convert the alicorns and turn the greatest weapons on the planet to their cause.

And if the Succuponies couldn’t be worn down through conventional methods, the Parliment had offered other ... methods. But said methods would scar not just Equestria for millenia, but likely alter the planet in ways the Powers had never intended.

And as it was Ponies who were the root cause of the problem, it would be Celestia and Luna who would have to answer for the deviations from the strange, unfathomable plan of the Powers. And if the Powers decided that Ponies had deviated too far from their ‘plan’, then it was entirely likely that it would be the end of the species and all the many branches that had sprung from …

“Luna?” The Princess jolted, cursing softly as she realized she’d gone to sleep standing upright.

And after I just told Trixie that sleep was a luxury to my kind! Luna berated herself as she turned to look at Twilight, noting how the candle had lost a full third of its length. “Yes, Twilight? I’m sorry, I was just … thinking.”

“…Was it about a battlefield?”

“How in Tartarus could you … the Sympathy?” Luna’s shocked outburst faded into a whisper as she eyed Twilight nervously. The other Alicorn’s colour was returning, but she still looked green around the gills. Although if that was from the residual alcohol or what she might have just seen was a question Luna found herself loathe to ask.

“I saw … I saw Celestia burning Ponies, and then trying to set fire to a tower. I s-saw you, cutting up dead Ponies with tails like Trixie and Sunset. I saw armies …” Twilight’s voice was soft as a moonbeam, but the horror in it, and on her face, made Luna back up a step before she rushed over to Twilight’s side, brushing the tears out of her lover’s eyes with a tender wingtip. “It really happened, didn’t it?”

“It was the closing days of the Lust Wars, Twilight. There was … there was a great deal of pressure upon Ponykind to contain and eliminate the threat, and all efforts to try and cure the victims, either bewitched Ponies or newly-made Succuponies, ended in abysmal failure.” Luna whispered as Twilight’s legs snaked out from under the cover to hold her close as the two Alicorns tried to draw strength from one-another. “Celestia still has nightmares of those times, Twilight, thousands of years after the fact. Happy Place, and the mind-healers before her, have laboured to divest Celestia of her guilt from those days, but I fear she will carry the burden to the end of all that is. It was … what we did, what we had to do to keep the rest of Ponykind uncorrupted reminded her of a very terrible day.”

“You took lives.” Twilight said bluntly, and Luna cringed.

So, this is how it ends. Twilight will not accept what Celestia and I had to do to safeguard Equestria, I will lose my friend and lover, and Celestia will lose the closest she has had to a child of her heart since before my corruption. All because of this accursed Sympathy.

“Yes.” Luna whispered back, waiting for the inevitable rejection, the coldness in Twilight’s eyes as she was pushed back from the other Alicorn … and was instead surprised when Twilight hugged her tighter, burying her smaller purple muzzle into the fur of Luna’s neck and sighing.

“Is that why Princess Celestia is so adamant about violence being a last resort? Her guilt over the lives lost under her reign? I think I understand why now, just a little. To have to do that, when I know she’s a kind Pony at heart … I don’t think I’d have the courage to do that.”

“I … don’t know, but I would assume that such events play a large part in Celestia’s aversion towards violence. Sisters are not privy to all of each other’s secrets after all, and my sister has had more than her fair share of hardships to deal with long before I came into the world.”

“I … want to know why, Luna.” Twilight’s voice tickled Luna’s skin as the two Alicorns slowly disentangled from one another. “Why history has been edited, why the Innate Magics of the Earth and Pegasi Tribes has been suppressed, why my friends and I were put into so much danger on the chance I would Ascend into an Immortal.”

Luna opened her mouth to explain, again, when a purple hoof pressed against her lips.

“And I want to hear, if you’ll pardon the term, the truth from the horse’s mouth, as it were.” Twilight, even hung-over and suffering mightily, gave Luna a look that gave the Princess pause. “I don’t want to put you in a position where you have to come between Celestia and I, but I will have an answer.”

They held that position for several moments before Luna bent Twilight’s hoof down and nuzzled it softly, before tucking it, and the rest of the limb, back under the blanket and tucking Twilight in.

“If that’s truly your wish, Twilight, then of course I agree. You are serious about this, considering you just referred to my sister without the honorific. I can count perhaps a few times since I’ve know you that you have not referred to Celestia without her title proceeding her name and it not being the potential end of Equestria as we know it.” Luna whispered as she settled down at Twilight’s side, her slightly larger frame allowing her to keep eye-contact with the alicorn on the couch. “I know that my sister has been looking forwards to ‘lifting the veil’, as she calls it, and preparing you for rulership at her side, but perhaps if we can ambush her before she is ready, you might get the answer you seek … but I will question if it will be the answer you want.”

“Truth, even a bitter truth, is better than a comforting lie.”

“Sometimes a comforting lie is all we have to get through dark times, Twilight.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrysalis stared at the roof as her young suckled, consoling the young male who had lost the contest for the right to drink first against his sisters, as she felt Shining’s presence moving through the castle.

She could feel his anger and frustration, his fear and his concern, and even his love … for another.

It hurt.

Oh, not as an injury would hurt, she had had enough of those over her life-time to understand the difference between a physical injury and what she was feeling now, especially with her current physical condition, but still it hurt.

On one level, the Changeling Queen knew that this was a side-effect of drinking too deeply, of connecting too strongly to a single host. Normally, in time, such a connection would fade with a few weeks of separation from the host and her Infiltrators, especially those who had specialized in ‘honey-trap’ personas of either gender, would suffer such pangs, but it was the first time Chrysalis had endured such a condition personally. Those who had lived much longer times as their Pony personas had a much rougher time of things, often suffering for months or even asking to remain with their host even after the Hive had to move on.

Chrysalis considered grimly what might have happened if she had not recalled all of her Hive to her for the Canterlot offensive. The barrier-shield that had ejected her Hive from Canterlot might have spared a good fifth of her hive if she had left the Infiltrator-caste members who had developed too deep a rapport with their Hosts … or the sensations from thousands of their kin dying in agony scorching through the Hive-Mind’s network might have caused them to drop their disguises and forced them to flee their Hosts.

Or worse still, end up dying at the hooves of their Hosts. She could think of few ways worse for a Changeling to leave this world.

And now Chrysalis knew intimately now how much it hurt to be rejected by one’s Host. Even the many injuries she endured these days didn’t hurt as deeply as the knowledge that Shining had rejected her. On a conscious level, Chrysalis was aware of the why, that she had replaced his lover, that she’s risked the safety of his home, that she was not his chosen mate …

But on another level, one that she tried to keep private from the Hive-Mind and found, to her embarrassment and dismay, that the rest of the Hive was all too aware of it regardless, the fact that Shining no-doubt despised her caused Chrysalis no end of distress that no amount of logic or explanation could ease. Pretending to be Cadence had been somewhat trying, but as she realized that Shining and Cadence’s physical relationship had been lacking, she’d been able to be more ‘true’ to her own self during their times together as lovers, rather than the public façade of the dashing Captain of the Royal Guard and the chaste Princess of Love.

And he’d been delighted at her ‘sudden’ change of heart in the bedroom. Indeed, he’d responded so well it had been easy at times to forget she was imitating another Pony and had to constantly remind herself to hold the shape she currently wore and not slip back into her original form in the heat of the moment. A part of her wondered that, if she’s approached him and slowly worked her way in as a diplomat, rather than an invader, she might have indeed stolen his affections away from Cadence with little ill-will from Shining and even the blessings of the Ponies.

I’m in love with a Pony. The Empress may have been right to call my brood-sisters and I defective. It would be like a Pony falling in love with a sandwich … although if a sandwich could spoon like that and produce such delicious love even when I wasn’t milking him for every drop of seed he could produce, it would probably be more common.

Majesty, the Guard-Prime of Hive Celestia is demanding an audience. Chrysalis was shaken out of her thoughts by the intrusion of her oldest Guard-caste’s sending through the Hive-Mind. She wishes to increase the number of Hive-Celestia Guards protecting our quarters.

I can feel the presence, and agitation, of Junior-Queen Cadence and Guard-Prime Shining Armor in a distant wing of this Hive. Guard-Prime Rosebush no-doubt wishes to ensure they cannot reach us easily.

The Junior-Queen would go against the Senior-Queen? Are their Hives also in conflict and their Queens meeting to discuss peace as we are?

I told you, my child, these Ponies are divided, fractious beings, and Junior-Queen Cadence agitates against our presence on personal grounds, believing we seek to continue our aggression against Hive Celestia. Agree to her request, but allow me to look through your eyes first. I wish to see this ‘Rosebush’ and take her measure myself.

As you command, Majesty.

For a moment, Chrysalis experienced a strange overlapping of two different fields of view before her mind snapped to the sight afforder her through her eldest Guard-Caste’s eyes, looking down at the sour-faced Pegasus, feeling a twinge of annoyance at seeing a Mare wearing the uniform that she’d become so accustomed to seeing on Shining Armor’s broad frame.

How many times did I peel that cloth off his frame with my teeth? How many times did I …

Majesty?

Ignore it, my child, I was not concentrating. Let us hear what the Guard-Prime of Hive Celestia wants.

“...Well? Or do I have to take this directly to your Queen?” Captain Rosebush snapped, her irritation and anger flowing off her in waves so thick the Hive-Mind shuddered at the bitter taste the poor Guard-Caste was being smothered in.

“Queen Chrysalis has just acknowledged that more Guard-caste protecting these rooms is an excellent idea.” The Guard-Caste Changeling replied placidly, and Chrysalis mentally patted him on the head for not rising to the unspoken challenge in the Pony’s words, let alone the aggression that was literally radiating out of her. “Anything that might keep Que … Princess Cadence away from the Hive is acceptable, within reason.”

“… How on Equuis did you … oh, right the Hive-Mind. That must be rather useful, especially when a certain somepony is hiding from the Stallion she seduced while wearing another Mare’s form.”

Oh. So that is why you hate me, not because I invaded your city and made a mockery of your precious Royal Guard, but that I had a buffet-table’s worth of what you can never have … Guard, repeat everything I say, word-for-word.

“My Queen would like to point out that, while she did indeed disguise herself as Princess Cadence, she did not act as Princess Cadence would in the bedroom, and Shining Armor found it to be very refreshing. And pleasurable. Every night. Often several times a night. For months. Right under your nose.” The Guard-Caste dutifully repeated every word, utterly oblivious to the fact he’d was performing the verbal equivalent of flicking lit matches into a sea of oil on behalf of his madly-chortling Queen. “My Queen also asks if, like Princess Cadence, you require lessons on being an active partner in the bedroom, or do you believe lying there like a sack of potatoes is all you require?”

“W-what? What? WHAT?” Rosebush spluttered, going pale for several moments before apparently losing the ability to speak.

Majesty, I do not understand. Your attempt to help Guard-Prime Rosebush understand your actions with her predecessor and offer of training in Pony courtship rituals appears to have instead enraged her.

I know, and by the Spawning Pit, don’t take your eyes off her, I want to sear that expression on her face into my memories for years to come. Just because I have to bow before these Ponies doesn’t mean I have to be nice about it. Hah!

Rosebush stared at the Guard-Caste Changeling with an expression that simply defied any hope of simple explanation: Her mouth was open in a way that remind Chrysalis of a dog-mid-bark, but her lips had been curled back and her facial features scrunched up as if she’d bitten into something rancid. Her eyes had narrowed in anger and her pupils shrunk down to the size of a pin-head, fixated on the unwitting Guard’s face, while her nose twitched franticly and her ears had flattened and drooped down over the side of her head even as her mane stood on end, all the while a faint ‘reeeeee’ sound could be heard issuing from the back of her throat.

Majesty …

You are protected by the blood-pact I made with Queen Celestia, Guard, you will be fine. At worst, all she can do to you is yell at you and insult the size of your reproductive organs.

How would she know the size of my reproductive organs? And why would that be something to insult? I am bred to fight, not mate.

It is a pony thing, my child, and don’t worry, as far as size goes your shape-changing abilities would allow you to compensate for any, ahem, shortcomings of biology. When offended or angry, Ponies will attempt to belittle the other party to make themselves feel better.

Was something that I said to her offensive? Did I use the wrong words when I passed on your message to Guard-Prime Rosebush?

It … well you see … it is not your fault. Worry not, I am sure the good Guard-Prime will simply tuck tail and run rather than risk violating the terms of the pact we have with Hive Celestia, or worse still, openly disobey her Queen.

“IT IS ON, YOU COCKROACH BITCH!”

Wait, what?

Majesty, the Guard-Prime has slipped past me and has entered the temporary Hive!

Oh fuck me sideways!

Majesty, you are too injured for such activities and the Guard-Prime appears to have ill-intent towards your person!

No, you idiot! Run to Queen Celestia and tell her that her Guard-Prime is attempting to kill me! ALL CHANGELINGS WITHIN THE TEMPORARY HIVE! BARRICADE YOURSELVES INTO YOUR ROOMS AND SEAL THE DOORWAYS WITH COCOON-GEL! Drone-Prime is to help her Queen secure my private quarters immediately! Scout-Prime is to take position in the rafters of the primary hallway and begin immediate surveillance of the situation until such time as his personal safety becomes at risk! Do not lift the barricades until I tell you otherwise!

Chrysalis struggled to get up, her offspring clinging to her as panic and alarm spread through the Hive-Mind and doing more to hinder her than the pain of her injuries did, the implacable Candy Apple giving the injured Queen a sour look before helping Chrysalis pry her children off her and wordlessly accepted the offspring into her brawny care as the Drone-Prime, her chitin still bearing a faint net-work of pale-green spiderweb-like patterns, scars from her personal exodus from Canterlot and impacting into a mountain-side, came scrabbling into the room in a mad panic, slamming the door behind herself and immediately pushing a antique dressing-table over in-front of the door. Within seconds, the door began to shake violently in the frame under the assault of a pair of hooves.

“I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE, BITCH! I CAN SMELL THE SKANKINESS!”

“Oh, I will have a devil of a time explaining this to Princess Celestia.” Chrysalis muttered darkly, ignoring the stabbing pains in her side and the taste of blood in the back of her throat as the Changeling Queen used her magic to levitate heavier pieces of furniture over to the doorway, while Drone-Prime began spitting the thick, goopy-green gel over the doorway and the make-shift barricade, quickly manipulating the substance and forcing it to harden, bonding door to door-frame, and both of them to priceless antique furniture as the hammering on the other side of the doorway grew louder and the insults became more feral and blood-thirsty.

Scout-Prime, report! What are the other guards of Hive Celestia doing?

Scout-Prime reporting. Majesty, the other guards of Hive Celestia appear to be trying to talk Guard-Prime Rosebush down, but she appears to have incapacitated one of them with a blow between the hind-legs, and the others are keeping well out of range of Guard-Prime Rosebush’s physical attacks. None of the Ponies appear to be willing to physically restrain Guard-Prime Rosebush, but nor are they assisting her trying to enter your quarters, or those of the rest of the Hive.

Keep watch, my child, one does not become the Guard-Prime of Queen Celestia’s prized Royal Guard without being an exceptional warrior and tactician. So long as her rage is blinding her to more effective means of entry, our fortifications should hold, but if she begins a different tactic, let me know immediately. Chrysalis sent back through the Hive-Mind, wincing and dropping to her knees as the effort of moving just a few pieces of furniture sapped her strength, her three newborns wailing from the fear and confusion that rushed back and forth through the Hive-Mind, and the loud banging and angry shouting coming through the thick wooden door. Long minutes ticked by as the Pegasus’s fury failed to abait and Chrysalis risked diverting her attention from the flimsy barricade to dive into the Hive-Mind again.

Guard-Prime, have you been able to locate Queen Celestia yet? Our situation is unchanged but still dangerous!

Majesty, the Guards I have contacted believe that Guard-Prime Rosebush would react violently when provoked about former Guard-Prime Shining Armor, but my pleas to meet Queen Celestia have been denied. They are sending for her, but it may take some time to locate Queen Celestia and without a Hive-Mind to inform her of the threat to your person, the seriousness of the situation may be understated by these Ponies.

Continue your attempts to secure aid through non-lethal means, Guard-Prime, but be prepared to return immediately and help your siblings launch a counter-assault on Guard-Prime Rosebush.

Can we risk that, Majesty? Guard-Prime’s mental tone held equal components concern and frustration. Your blood-pact with Queen Celestia prevents us from doing lasting physical harm to any member of her Hive. If the blood-pact activates, it could kill you instantly.

I chose the wording of the blood-pact carefully, Guard-Prime, and since Guard-Prime Rosebush has acted against her Queen’s will and is attempting to physically assault myself, the blood-pact will not activate should we use only defensive actions to protect ourselves.

Acknowledged, Majesty. I shall attempt to impress upon these Guard-Caste Ponies the seriousness of the situation … I believe I have just found a Sub-Prime-Guard, he appears to be considering the situation more seriously than his underlings.

“I AM GOING TO TEAR THE CHITIN OFF YOUR FAT ASS AND BEAT YOU WITH IT, CHRYSALIS! THEN WE’LL SEE WHO LAYS THERE LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES! YOU AND CADENCE BOTH WILL SEE!”

Please hurry, my child. The Pegasus may try to use her lightning in this confined space to break through the doorway, and my offspring would not survive the blast-wave.

Nor would you, Majesty. This Sub-Prime-Guard ‘Dawn Ray’ has gone in search of Celestia and ordered the other Guards of Hive Celestia to assist me in subduing Guard-Prime Rosebush. We should be there in a few minutes.

Why so long? It took you only a short while to reach them!

Majesty, I have wings. Most of these Guard-Caste are either Earth Ponies or Unicorns. Even running at full speed, it will take them some time to reach our new Hive.

Simply move as fast as you can, and let the Ponies subdue one of their own. It will appear more palatable to Queen Celestia and her hive if their own subdue this rogue Pony than if one of ours takes her down.

By your will, Majesty. Please stay safe.

Why not let High-Prime-Caretaker Candy Apple subdue the rogue Guard-Prime? A Changeling sent out through the Hive-Mind, and for several moments Chrysalis was subjected to all manner of imagery involving Candy Apple ‘subduing’ Captain Rosebush that looked more suitable for a wrestling ring than combat.

Because Candy Apple is protecting my offspring. With them completely secured, I may focus on the barricade and organizing our forces. Now, please keep the Hive-Mind clear of chatter, private communications only unless your own barricades start to come under attack, I need to focus and I believe I have just made my injuries worse. Chrysalis sent back, layering the thoughts with exasperation and soothing love to calm her frantic children, both newborn and adults alike. Scout-Prime, anything to report?

Guard-Prime Rosebush has yet to attempt anything other than brute force against the barricade, Majesty, although she appears to be running out of stamina. We may not need to launch a counter-assault after all. Also, I think she saw me earlier.

Meaning? Chrysalis asked, and frowned as the message narrowed to a personal two-way communication between herself and the Scout-Prime.

Meaning that I will need to apologise to the Drone-Prime of Hive Celestia and the Guards below me, as I peed a little and the carpet and Guards caught the worst of it.

“YOU HEAR ME, CHANGELING? I’M GOING TO HAVE SHINING ARMOR TAKE ME ON-TOP OF YOUR SMOKING CORPSE!”

All things considered, my child, I think you’ll be excused under the circumstances.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rarity snorted and looked around her room, insofar as much as the full-body cast would allow, her eyes narrowing as her gaze took in the two strapping Stallions at parade-stance on either side of her bed.

Bat-Pony Stallions. Not necessarily a bad view, two muscular stallions’ behinds within easy ogling view while lying in her bed, but the situation involving said behinds was most certainly something to fret about. And even worse, if she did give in to her body’s demand to sleep, she’d be entirely at the mercy of the Thestrals’ mistress, and Rarity still had pride enough to not be completely dominated in the supposed privacy of her own mind!

Princess Luna had supposedly assigned Rarity ‘body-guards’ to protect her while she healed, twelve bat-pony guards of both genders and three bat-pony mares to tend to her other needs, a princely gift and a gesture of respect to an outsider’s point of view. But their real purpose was to isolate Rarity and keep her from letting Equestria know the truth about her injuries, and her ‘friends’, of that Rarity had no doubt.

And unfortunately, that meant Nurse Redheart wouldn’t be around much except to make a daily check-up to make sure Rarity wasn’t making her own injuries worse, and on the way back to her home, the Earth Pony had made it abundantly clear she held Rarity at fault for the disaster with the Cutiemark Crusaders and had threatened dire consequences if Rarity ever pulled such a ‘bone-headed’ move ever again.

It wasn’t difficult for Rarity to turn around and accept that she shouldn’t have played a prank on Applejack for saving her life, not now that her temper had cooled and she had time to consider the facts without being surrounded by accusers. Her face’s honor demanded some form of recompense … but the way all of her friends had turned violent towards her had Rarity’s mind spinning in circles at the implications.

It was a disaster in every sense of the word, and yes, I might have been at fault for some of it, but the Cakes were the ones that turned a cake that was supposed to keep Applejack and her family awake all night into a pile of aphrodisiacs! Yet it was I who bore the brunt of everypony’s anger! Rarity stewed over that, unable to toss and turn, trapped within the shell of her full-body cast, a prison which only increased her irritability and sapped her patience. I am not going to give up on my dream to join the Canterlot elite, but this … snafu … has to be rectified.

Can one tell if they’ve gone insane? The thought drifted through her mind, giving the fashionista a growing sense of dread.

The Lunar Princess had claimed that the loss of her Elements had been the final push that had driven her insane and given the Nightmare spirit the chance to fully possess her, and that it was the most likely outcome when one was rejected by the Elements, such as the limited interactions Ponykind had had with the mysterious relics. Had she truly been as generous as she believed she was, or was it the Element influencing her? What if her ‘lapses’ had actually been her true nature? Or was it just being overwhelmed by mingling with Canterlot’s elite, and the delectable Fancypants that had overcome her normal sense of self?

There were no obvious answers, and Rarity knew many of Equestria’s greatest artists had danced along the razor’s edge that divided genius from madness, a fact that was public knowledge. The thought that the wonderful life she had been living over the past three years might have only been possible because of some magical relic re-writing her personality to fit some divine mandate necessary to wield it was a further nightmare to add to the pile, as Rarity had spent years trying to make a name for herself and working herself to the bone to keep her integrity as she maneuevered through the social mine-field of users, abusers and freeters in the fashion arena without being manipulated by any one clique or powerful group, and to think that some … uppity rock, however fashionable, might have altered her personality, her very self, without so much as a by-your-leave was not a comforting thought.

And what if this is the end of things? The Element of Generosity defected to Twilight, and my friends all hate me for something I did not plan on and had only the barest responsibility for. Rarity sighed, trying to smile out the opening at the 'eating' end of her full-body cast as one of the two Stallions turned and gave her a questioning look about all the sighing coming from her. What if we can’t patch things up? I don’t think I could bear to stay in Ponyville if I’ve turned Twilight and Fluttershy against me, and my business will surely fail if it becomes public knowledge that I’ve offended the Apple clan and Pinkie Pie. Faust only knows if I’m going to be ducking dive-bombings from Rainbow Dash after this, what if she decides to come back and finish the job! Or Princess Luna decides her precious lover’s interests are best served if I disappear from the public eye for good! I certainly can’t go against the Princesses in the public arena, antagonistic media or not, I’d be torn to shreds without strong political backing to defend myself from their latent popularity …

Perhaps it would be best to end things on a clean note? Apologise, however much it rankled, leave town under her own power rather than wait for the inevitable, start up the boutique in a new part of Equestria, keep in touch with the girls via mail until such time as things could be smoothed over, allow time dull the harshness of the words they’d flung at one another?

If Celestia truly does keep files on us all, then perhaps I can leverage what good I have done and the potential scandal I could cause for a small shop in Canterlot itself, distant enough that the Bearers and I can avoid one another, but close enough that I can visit them, and they me, once we’ve all cooled down and had time to get over this disaster. I can say I just wanted to pursue my true passion, clothing and fashion, when I explain why I am closing the boutique in Ponyville to the rest of the town. A bitter-sweet smile blossomed on Rarity’s face as she considered the best ways to explain away her sudden move away from town. It’s not like Ponyville is exactly crawling with Ponies who crave fine clothing, and moving to Canterlot would be beneficial for my business, given most of my patrons live in Canterlot, or have businesses there.

The next thought came bitterly to Rarity.

After all, I’m no longer one of them. No Element to bear, thanks to Twilight.

No longer a hero of the nation, no longer a wielder of cosmic forces that could conquer any foe. No longer Rarity Belle the Generous, but just Rarity Belle. Just herself.

The thought was both liberating and terrifying. The cornerstone of her rise to international fame was gone, and possibly her only hopes of leveraging her friendship with the remaining Bearers in a single day. Yet without the Element dragging her off to Faust-forsaken corners of the globe to seal away or reform ancient evils and terrifying monsters, perhaps she could use her lingering fame to cement a position of some respectability within Canterlot. Marrying into the Nobility was still within her reach, if she kept the disaster that had happened today on the down-low and used her existing connections in Canterlot to work her way up the pecking order to a place of relative comfort and influence.

Rarity might not be able to be second only to Princess Celestia, like she had once dreamed of, and bring Equestria out of the artistic dark-ages, but she might at least still influence the realm for the good of future artists like herself.

Perhaps the plan would work, perhaps not. She had at least a week of nothing to do but plan, thanks to the infernal full-body cast she was trapped in, and Rarity was nothing if not an opportunist. If denied the ability to work, and forced to remain in social isolation by the machinations of Princess Luna, then she would use that time to best decide her future course of action.

“Okay, move you lugs, it’s time to give our patient her meal.” Rarity flinched in her plaster shell at the child-like tone, as a silver-haired Thestral Mare slipped into the room, a tray containing a bowl of something that smelled absolutely delicious, a glass of water and probably whatever medication that Nurse Redheart had insisted on to keep infection at bay and speed the natural healing of Rarity’s body in-between batteries of magical healing spells.

And probably sleeping pills were high on the list of that medical cocktail of perscriptions.

And sleeping pills meant dreaming.

And dreaming meant slipping into the uncontested dominion of Princess Luna, and that was a battlefield that Rarity was most certainly not prepared to fight on right now.

“Miss Moonbeam, I assure you, I am most certainly not hungry.”

“And I’m a Griffon’s mommy. Its good milk stew, and you need all the food we can give to you as your body stitches itself back together.” The Thestral Mare replied with amused exasperation, her silver eyes twinkling with humor as she slapped one of the guards good-naturedly on the backside with a leathery wing and seated herself on the edge of Rarity’s bed, her other wing gingerly wrapping around the handle of the spoon and dipping it into the stew. “Besides, I’ve seen the size of some of these pills, you’re going to need something to help slide them down your throat.”

“Mmmmph.” Rarity fumed, but knew better than to protest too much. Nurse Redheart had been rather blunt on what she would do to Rarity if the cocktail of prescription drugs wasn’t taken in the correct doses, and more terrifying than Ponyville’s resident no-nonsense nurse, the Fashionista was fairly certain the Thestrals were under orders to make her comply with a great many things over the next week.

True to her word, Moonbeam’s milk stew was good, and the pills were rather large, and strangely enough, none of the medication seemed to be sleeping pills. Rarity’s demand to see the pills and have the prescription read to her with what each one did, to ensure she knew what side-effects to look for, had been greeted by eye-rolls from Moonbeam and silent shrugs from the Guards, but the victory, however small, gave Rarity confidence and a sense of control over her own situation, such as it was.

And Rarity knew most of the common brands of sleeping medication available within Ponyville, having gone through most of them over the years when late-nights and manic design sessions had disrupted her sleeping patterns to the point the Unicorn needed ‘medical assistance’ to return to a normal routine.

“Thank you. It was delicious.” Rarity said evenly, keeping what she knew from long practice to be a friendly smile on her face as the last of the stew was eaten and Moonbeam prepared a straw for Rarity to use with the glass of water.

“I appreciate the compliment, this stew is a specialty of mine for sick patients, helps calm the stomach and all.” Moonbeam replied, her silver eyes beaming down at Rarity, the strange orbs reflecting the moonlight as she locked eyes with the immobilized Unicorn, and Rarity began to feel strangely heavy and lethargic despite herself.

Wait … Rarity thought, even the sudden surge of panic at falling asleep feeling muted and so far away. Moonlight? But … my windows …

Rolling her eyes to the side as far as they could go, Rarity confirmed her windows were closed and the blinds drawn, and remembered they’d been closed for hours now to keep the chill out of her room on Nurse Redheart’s orders! There was no way for the moonlight to enter her room, which meant …

She let me see all the medication because there never was any need for sleeping pills. Moonbeam is using some sort of … magic to stop … stop me staying awake. She’s … vampony … no, that’s …

“And sick patients need their sleep.” Moonbeam’s voice was all honey and comfort, her eyes glowing ever brighter with pale, hypnotic silver-white light that the immobilized Rarity could not avoid, her eyelids growing heavier and the urge to sleep becoming all-consuming. “Go to sleep, Lady Rarity, you need your rest.”

“Noooouuuuuhh …” Rarity whimpered, unable to tear her eyes away again from those luminous eyes as her body became as heavy as lead, and finally her eyes closed of their own accord, even as the silvery light stayed in her mind.

Down and down, Rarity felt herself falling into a warm, dark, softness, comforting and yet somehow overwhelming, her desire to stay awake, to avoid that inevitable confrontation with Luna fading to a dull impulse in her soul as Rarity’s mind tumbled into a deep, endless darkness.

And at last we meet, my other self. The voice seemed to come from somewhere to her left, and as the falling, tumbling Unicorn tried to orient herself in the direction of the voice, she found herself staring into a distorted mirror-image of herself, black-coated instead of white, with spring-green hair and a flank that bore three pulsing-green gemstones, twin to the purple gems on Rarity’s own flank.

W-who is it? Luna?

Hardly, although I am flattered you think me so powerful. Perhaps you would know me better as Nightmare Rarity.

No! You’re gone, I’m free … I’m …

Free? Hardly. There was no Elements of Harmony used on you that time, Rarity. Your friendship with the other Bearers might have weakened my hold on your soul, and the Princesses might have purged my essence from your being, but I am still here. An echo, a fragment of my former magnificence perhaps, but I am still here regardless. The doppelganger grinned as the two spun in tandem down into the darkness, the Nightmare seemingly fading in and out of the shadows of this place, growing more solid, more real the closer she came to Rarity. Due to method your friends tried to remove me, the bulk of my power was burned away, along with the corporeal forms of my kind, while my mind was pressed into yours until we were so tangled we became inseparable, and I was suppressed into the darkest corners of your mind, an unwilling passenger on a ride of banality and insipid drama.

I am the dark parts of your very sense of self now, my essence fusing with the darkness in your heart, you mind, your spiritual flaws were why the Nightmares chose you as my vessel in the first place, over all your friends, even the incredibly powerful Twilight Sparkle … because you have hate inside you, Rarity Belle. Jealousy, pride, envy and lust too. All things that we Nightmares crave, that feed us in the darkness of the Dreamscape.

Rarity found herself unable to speak for a period of time, the Nightmare’s words an answer she had long feared asking for ever since the day the Nightmares had claimed her as their new monarch, but as she struggled to escape, she found, to her dread, the Nightmare’s body mirrored her own movements, and somehow the two drifted closer together in the dark tunnel they tumbled down together.

I AM NOT YOU! Rarity shrieked at the spectre, who simply laughed back at her.

Nor am I you, but soon neither of us will be able to claim this as truth! The Nightmare chortled as the two spun closer and closer together. Now that you’ve foolishly lost the protection of Generosity, I am no longer suppressed into your subconscious, yet I have not the strength to possess you. The void left by Generosity in your spirit when it left draws on us both to heal the spiritual ‘wound’, and now we are inexorably bound to a fate neither of us desire. All because of your ‘friends’!

And since I’m sure you have no desire to spend the rest of your natural life fighting me for control of your vessel, we have but one option before us: We join forces and work as partners, or else doom each other to a lifetime of misery and battles for dominance!

Do you take me for a fool? Even if I no longer have my duties as a Bearer, or my friendship with the others, Princess Luna will do all in her power to purge me of your vile existence once and for all if only because she knows intimately the evil you and all the Nightmares represent!

Are you so sure? Thanks to your friends’ flawed efforts to purge me before, I am now your darkness given form, Rarity, dear sister, every dark thought, every vile impulse you suppress and oppress to function in society given a voice you now cannot ignore. We are two who are one at the core, two distinct beings irrevocably bound at our source. Luna can no more separate us as we are right now than you can separate the milk from the tea once the two share the same tea-cup. I will be suppressed, but the instant you slip, I’ll be there, waiting, and we’ll be back in this position, and we’ll both be weaker for it each and every time until you’re a drooling lump in a bed, and I’m the faintest whisper of myself.

Then I will dedicate myself to being a fabulous drooling lump! Rarity shrieked back at the spectre, pulling a forehoof back to smite the doppelganger, even as the mirror-image did the same, and the Nightmare’s face twisted into a mad grin that distorted Rarity’s mirrored face into a horrific parody, the smile reaching to the back of the head and turning into a mad cackle of delight in response to Rarity’s scream of outrage and denial, the Nightmare’s open mouth revealing rows upon rows of mismatched teeth from predators and prey alike.

A pity. I had hoped you would be more amendable to a partnership … Nightmare Rarity cackled as the two hooves, one pristine and white, the other immaculate and black, slammed into each other, and the two beings screamed, one in agony, the other in victory, as the hooves deformed into one another, the two mirrored beings struggling to pull apart. But I’ll take an aggressive merger of our assets if that’s all you’ll offer!

Rarity screamed in horror and rage as the deformed sphere of flesh that had once been her hoof, and that of her doppelganger suddenly began dragging on the rest of her body, pulling her towards her nemesis, tendrils of her white coat snapping up the black limb of her Nightmare like creeping vines, while a horrific network of the Nightmare’s black coat scurried up and through her flesh like a demented spider’s web, the two beings inexorably drawn towards one another at their juncture.

All conscious thought fled Rarity as she lashed and kicked at her Nightmare like a wounded animal, her doppelganger mirroring each and every movement, every blow of a hoof, every twist of their bodies dragging them tighter and tighter together, and the alien sensation of a hostile mind, an incompatible soul, pressing against her sense of self like two fluids separated by a flimsy barrier that allowed parts of both to flow through it into the other, a sensation not unlike thorned tongues caressing her being, her very sense of self, in a way that made even the most debased physical violation feel like a lover’s caress, twinned with the unholy sensation of her own essence doing the same to the Nightmare!

Finally, Rarity lashed forwards with her mouth, trying to bite through the Nightmare’s windpipe in hatred, agony and the vain hope that somehow she could end her suffering before their fusion reached its unholy conclusion, only to meet her doppelganger’s muzzle in the process, the two clashing in the same loathsome fusion, forced to glare into each other’s eyes as their heads were drawn into a single whole in agonizing slowness, Rarity monstrously aware of every inch, every struggle of her muscles to pull back, to avoid this final, irrevocable joining as the Nightmare’s own madness-filled orbs danced with glee before their eyes came close enough to touch, and then …

For what seemed like ages, the blob of mingled white and black twitched and struggled in the endless chasm of Rarity’s dreamless sleep, flowing one way, then another as its surface writhed with half-formed limbs under the surface struggling against one-another, or thrashing against the conjoined skin that contained them, the skittering veins of black hide and white coat lashing against and around one another before finally, blessedly, the two seemed to come to a truce of some sort, white ceasing to ooze into black and black stopping seeping into white.

And then, just as the commingled orb of Nightmare and Pony seemed to come to rest, a great and terrible force caused it to ripple at one spot, as if an egg being struck on an inner surface by an enraged chick. Again and again the orb shuddered as the same spot was struck over and over again, until black and white hide split to reveal a bizarre muzzle, coated in slick red fluid, that retreated and pushed forwards again, the nostrils flexing and breathing deeply as the muzzle paused before withdrawing and thrusting itself from the ‘egg’.

The upper half of the head was Rarity, while the lower half of it was the top of the Nightmare’s head, an abominable conjoinment as the new entity's eyes rolled in torment and pain, and the twinned, awkward muzzle opened to vent a primal scream of rage, agony and triumph.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rarity awoke, screaming, with such force her full-body cast cracked in several places and the windows of her bedroom shook in their frames, shocking her guards and Moonbeam into stepping back before the Thestral Mare jumped forwards, securing Rarity from falling off the bed as the two Night Guard belaboured struggled to help her keep the mummified Pony on the bed.

“Luna’s right plot-cheek, what the hell!” One of the Guards grunted as three full-grown Ponies struggled to keep a supposedly immobilized Unicorn with life-threatening injuries from throwing them off of her.

“Lady Rarity, Lady Rarity, please, calm down, you were just having a nightmare!” Moonbeam shouted, barely able to keep herself at Rarity’s head as her eyes glowed with silver light again, trying to sedate the frantic Unicorn and finding to her shock that her hypnotic gaze was barely effective.

“Mirror! Face! Nightmare!” Rarity shrieked, and grunting, one of the Thestral Guards jumped off their struggling patient and rummaged around on Rarity’s nightstand for a hand-mirror, holding it over the Unicorn’s eyes, which widened, her mouth opened … and she stopped.

“Lady Rarity, what in the world …” Moonbeam asked, feeling oddly sore for a Pony who just lost a fight with an immobilized patient. Rarity’s expression as she stared into her reflection was, strangely enough, one of relief and joy, as if she couldn’t believe her own reflection.

“Nightmare … the Nightmare was … I couldn’t …” The Unicorn babbled, tears and snot flowing from her eyes and muzzle, and Moonbeam hugged the Unicorn as best she could, whispering soothing words and promises to stay by her side until Luna came to make it better, as one of the Guards slipped out the door and took wing at full pace to the Ponyville Library to fetch his mistress.

Rarity had begun to go mad ...