Vinylquest

by Aiyonbeam

Rating: everyone
Tags: DJ P0N-3, Other, Octavia, Comedy, Adventure, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 7898

Vinyl travels with Octavia after a power surge in an arcade sends them both into the video game world.

After all the time I've spent playing video games in the Canterlot Arcade, I actually get to be in them!
Finally, all my dreams of piloting intergalactic spaceships and fighting off demons are going to come true!
There's just one catch, though...
I have to bring Octavia with me.
Shouldn't be too hard, right?
After all, I've got help.

Published 2014-06-22 12:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-12-30 00:39:14 UTC

Main Menu

Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
Boop.

"A-ha!" Tavi called, her voice ringing across the arcade over the sound of the storm outside and the random sounds of the machines beeping quietly to themselves. "I scored a goal!"

I roll my eyes and chuckle, disengaging myself from my session of Pony Fighter II and walking over to her, bending over the machine she's playing and looking at the screen over her shoulder.

"First of all," I said. "goal!?"

"Hey, I'm not quite into your video game jargon just yet, Vinyl." Octavia shot back, giving me a quick glare before getting back to her game.

"Second of all," I continued. "You're playing Pong. Literally the first - and the simplest - video game ever. In the history of all video games."

"So?" Tavi said, scoring another point. "Everypony has to start somewhere. Didn't you start out playing this?"

"No." I said, pointing to the Pac-Pony cabinet. "I started with that, got bored after five minutes, and moved on to Dance Dance Evolution."

I swept my hoof across the empty arcade, indicating the machines.

"I then moved on to Element Command, then Moon Invaders, then Ponaga, and then to Pony Fighter, and then-"

"Okay, okay, I get it." Tavi said, scoring yet another goal. "Showoff."

"Hey, it's not like you can't get to my level." I said, leaning casually up against the Pong cabinet. "All you need is years of practice, an arcade, and the ability to use video games as a coping mechanism." I said.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Octavia said, glaring at me. "Set Pony Fighter II up for me."

"You think you can handle it?"

"If you can master it, how hard can it be?" Tavi said, grinning.

As we walked to the Pony Fighter machine, I ran my hoof along the machines I passed, each one an old friend to me.
Every single time something bad happened to me, the arcade was there for me. I grew up in here almost as much as I did in my own house. The original Pony Fighter had gotten me through my parents' divorce. Shaftbuilder had helped me cope with the fallout from my first gig, where I'd gotten stage fright and dropped the record I was supposed to play. Chance of Storms, brutally hard as it was, had helped me build the persistence and confidence to ask out my first date.
I knew all these games by heart; there were a part of me.
I snorted. And ponies say gamers have no lives.

The voice of Soldered Circuit, the owner of the arcade and one of my best friends since elementary school, cut through my reverie.

"I'm closing the shop now! You've got the Master Key?"

"Yep!" I called back at him, holding up the key which, when turned, would allow the arcade game it was placed in to run for free.

"Lock the doors when you're done!" he calls, exiting through the front door as I levitated the key into the coin slot of Pony Fighter II

As I turned the silver key, the words at the bottom saying Insert Credits. disappeared, to be replaced by the words Free Play.

"Remind me to buy Soldered Circuit a hayburger tomorrow." I said, stepping back and gesturing for Tavi to take the controls.

Suddenly, before either one of us could react, an electrical noise filled the arcade, and the screen flashed blue, then green, then yellow, then purple, then black-and-white, all in less than a second, before returning to the usual title screen of Pony Fighter II.
The sound of thunder ran through the arcade.

I turned to Tavi.

"I wasn't the only one to see that, right?" I asked.

"No, you weren't." Tavi replied, taking a hesitant step towards the machine.

I followed her, noting as I did that the words at the bottom no longer read 'Free Play'.
Instead, they read Ready to begin, heroes?

"What the heck?" I said, stepping in front of Tavi and looking at the screen.

"Ready to begin?" Octavia asked. "What in Equestria does that mean?"

"I dunno." I said, tapping the screen with a hoof. "Maybe it's broken?"

As we stared, the words at the bottom of the screen disappeared again, to be replaced one very unsettling word.

Ouch.

"Okay, this is getting freaky." I said.

The words changed again.

Press Start.

"There isn't even a 'start' button." Tavi said. "How can we-"

Suddenly, one of the buttons on the cabinet lit up. Upon further inspection, I realized it was the A button.

"Tavi..." I began.

"No, Vinyl." Octavia says. "You are not pushing that button."

"Of course not!" I said. "You are!"

Wait, what!?" Octavia said, right before I pushed her forward.

"Come on!" I said. "I thought you said you could handle it."

Tavi turned around and glared at me.

"That was before the arcade machine obtained sentience." she snarked.

I rolled my eyes.

"How is this different?" I asked. "Just press A, and then try and beat it."

"Vinyl..."

"I dare you to do it."

"Vinyl, do you seriously think I'm going to-"

"What if I quintuple-dog dared you to do it?"

Octavia gasped.

Every town in Equestria has its own unique promise that it keeps. Ponyville has the now-legendary Pinkie Promise. Baltimare and Las Pegasus share the infamous 'Griffin Gamble Swear', and Manehattan has the somewhat outdated yet still tried-and-true 'Ever-Binding Hoofshake'. But of all of them, Canterlot's own quintuple-dog dare is the most binding.

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, I would."

"Can't we talk this out? I mean, we're both reasonable mares."

"Of course we can, Tavi. It's simple, really: You press the button, play a few rounds, and then leave."

"But the machine-"

"Probably glitched out. Come on! You're never gonna be a real gamer unless you take risks!"

"No. I'm not doing it. I'm going to go back home and finish my book, like I'd planned to do before you dragged me to this stupid arcade."

You leave me no choice, then..."

"Vinyl, don't you dare!"

"Octavia Melody, I quintuple-dog dare you to press the A button on the Pony Fighter II machine!"

Octavia scowled.

"Sometimes," she said, turning to the machine and pressing A. "I really hate the fact that I know you."

Then everything went blue, then green, then yellow, then purple, and faded to black.

Zone 1 - Level 1: Terra Firma

[My head...]

Darkness. Nice, sweet, comforting darkness. Keeps me from focusing on the pain ripping through my skull.
Did I mention that my head feels like it's exploding?
Probably didn't.
Well, my head feels like it's exploding. I'd come up with a better term for the pain, but - as I said before - my head feels like it's exploding.

[Tavi...]

I lay in silence for what seems like an eternity.

[Tavi, are you all right?]

No answer.
I open my eyes, light piercing my head like daggers, and get to my feet, ignoring the pain that seems to be contained in every fiber of my being.
Yes, feet.
Great.
I take a few seconds to look myself over.
Guess I've been transformed into... something. The name of my new form lingers on the edge of my brain, a thought half-remembered.
Whatever it is, it's wearing a white T-shirt with my cutie mark emblazoned on it, jeans, and sandals. There's a pair of headphones around my neck, with no visible cord.
The pain slowly starts to fade, and I sigh in relief.

[Gotta find Tavi.]

I look around me. Purple grass, purple stone with giant chasms dotting the landscape, withered trees with purple leaves...
I sigh again.

[Corruption, huh? Well, looks like we're in Terra Firma.]

I sigh again, seeing a greyish-black monster rise out of a nearby chasm.
I find this oddly funny.

[Figures It'd try to kill me from the get-go...] I say, laughing mirthlessly.

That makes me pause.

[What would try to kill me?]

I try to think back to the arcade, and what came after...
I can't remember anything after the world went white, but a looming sense of evil overtakes me.
Something brought us here.
Something malevolent.

Geez, did I seriously just use the word 'malevolent' and mean it?

I make a mental list of all the things I know:
1. Tavi and I have been sucked into a video game.
2. I'm a strange thing; the same character you play as in Terra Firma.
3. Something - I don't know what - is out to get Tavi and I.

My thoughts are interrupted by the monster as it barrels into me and knocks me to the ground, its fangs digging into me for a second before it rebounds away, coming in for another attack.

I feel like I'm on fire, but I stand back up anyway, opening up my inventory.

I have no sword.

The monster tries to come back for round two, but I'm ready for him.

I have an axe.

The thing's more suited for chopping trees than heads, but it's light, and it keeps the monster at bay.

[This thing must be Forceful. There's no way it could do this otherwise.] I say, thinking aloud. [Guess I'm not completely out of luck.]

[What!?]

The monster falls back, its single eye open in shock.

I look around, trying to find the source of the other voice.
There's nopony around except the monster.
I turn to it, my mind working. It flies closer to me, its eye narrowed in confusion.

[Are you sentient?]
[Are you sentient?]

Both the monster and I speak at the same time, and we both recoil in shock.

[You are!] I say.

[The prophecy!] The monster says, flying away, back into the chasm. [The others must know!]

I stand there in shocked silence for a few minutes.

[So that happened.]

Slowly, I walk to the nearest group of trees, trying to process that bundle of oddness, and prepare to start chopping.

Before long, where the trees were, there's now a mess of saplings and a single workbench.
Using it, I craft a sword and a hammer out of wood - and by 'craft', I mean the wood disappears and the hammer and sword appear - and pick up the workbench.

[It's a really, REALLY long shot, but if I can find at least one exposed Shadow Orb...] I begin, thinking aloud again as I walk over to one of the pits. [I can break it, and get something that'd help me find Tavi. Anything would help.]

[The problem is,] I say. [How do I get down into that chasm without dying of fall damage or getting my limbs torn off by monsters?]

[That isn't very nice!]

I jump, turning around to find the monster from before floating behind me.

[You look strange to me, but I don't go around calling you a 'monster'!] the thing says.

I just stare at it in stunned silence.

[Was I only imagining that you could talk earlier?] it asks, flying up to me and studying my face with its single eye.

[N-No...] I say, getting over the initial shock. [You just startled me.]

The thing makes a noise that I assume is laughter. There isn't much mirth in it, and its eye stays the same, looking at me evenly.

[The others don't believe me.] It says. [It's been so long since the prophecy was made that they won't believe you exist...]

At this, its eye grows sad, and I reach out a hand to touch it. There's something oddly cute about the thing; I want to comfort it for some reason.

[Well, if they're as understanding as you, you could bring them up.] I say.

The thing recoils.

[Our King would never allow it!]

King?
As far as I knew, none of the creatures in Terra Firma ever had a king. Then again, none of them could talk...

[Who is this king?] I ask. [I might wanna go talk to him. Maybe he's found my friend.]

[We do not speak his name.] the creature says, fear in its voice. [He is the Great Devourer of All Things, the worm that sleeps under the earth.]

The Eater of Worlds.
That complicates things...

[Is there any way I could talk to your people down where you come from?] I ask. [I'll need all the help I can get in finding my friend.]

The creature hovers near my knee and looks up at me.

[I might not have the strength,] it says. [But I will carry you anywhere you wish.]

As I sit down on the creature, I ask it a question that's been on my mind ever since I started talking to it.

[Why aren't you trying to kill me right now?] I ask.

[Because you are one of the Heroes.] it replies. [The Regicide, whatever that means.]

Welp. That explains the deferential treatment.
Ugh. 'Deferential'? Geez, I'm starting to sound like somepony out of one of Tavi's books.

As I contemplate the task that's evidently been set for me, the creature and I descend into the darkness.

Zone 1 - Level 2: Reboot

[My head...]

I struggle to my feet, scrabbling at the dirt and grass underneath me.
Wait.
Feet?
Once I regain my balance, shaky as it is, I look down.
My hind legs are much, much longer than they were in the arcade. They end in flat things, with five smaller appendages at the ends. They're clad in some sort of covering that I immediately recognize as sandals, even though I've never even heard of them before, let alone seen them.
I look at my torso.
Essentially the same, with some... minor changes. I'm dressed in what looks like a grey business suit, with my cutie mark pinned on the lapels.
I examine my new 'arms' and 'hands' - the names leap into my mind as if on springs - and find them to be similar to my legs and feet.

[Vinyl?] I ask, looking around me.

I'm standing in a rather spacious expanse of flat, brightly verdant grass. Off towards the sunrise, I can see a large group of rather tall trees.
Away from the sun, the grass stretches almost farther than I can see, and I just barely make out the shore of a lake.

[It's so real! So... here!]

This is not at all what I expected a video game to be like.
I don't even care how I know I'm inside a video game.
I take a deep breath, let it out, and I feel alive!
Is this what Vinyl feels every time she plays one of these? It's amazing!

I get the sudden urge to sing about this place, with its so many wonders, but even enamored as I am, I decide to side with my better judgment.
Instead, I stroll towards the forest, whistling a happy tune.
It feels so good; the wind on my face, the grass on my feet, the sun in the sky...
Today is going to be a good day. I can feel it!

Something hits me in the back, hard, knocking me to the ground.

Rolling over, I see a green blob of what looks to be some sort of gelatinous goo lying at my feet. It jiggles for a few seconds, as if weighing its options, before flying into the air and landing squarely on my face.
I scream.

[Tavi!]

I hear Vinyl's voice through the thick mass covering me, and suddenly an arrow slams into the blob, knocking it off of me.
I take a few deep, grateful breaths, and sit upright.
Vinyl's clad in some sort of wooden armor, a bow held in her hand and a grimace on her face.

[Get away from my friend, you monster!]

Vinyl fires arrow after arrow at the slime, and soon it explodes into a blue substance that floats a few inches above the ground.
She walks over to the blue goo, and it disappears.
Vinyl holds out a hand, and I take it, getting to my feet and brushing myself off.
I'm then wrapped in a very, very tight hug.

[I'm so glad you're safe, Tavi.] Vinyl says. [I don't know what I'd do if you'd died out here.]

I hug her back.

[I'm glad to see you too, Vinyl.] I say. [And I'm glad you're safe.]

Vinyl's face brightens, and she lets go of me and gestures to the nearby forest.

[C'mon!] she says cheerily. [I found some people here!]

I follow her through the trees until I come to a small area where the trees thin out.
In the clearing stands a wooden house, at least three stories high. Doors are set into the house every so often, and stairs lead from the second story to the ground.

[I haven't cleared away enough trees to fit the third story staircase yet.] Vinyl explains. [But it fits the three other humans I've found.]

As she opens the door to the first floor, another human with messy brown hair pokes his head into the doorway, smiling.

[This is the other one, then?] he asks.

[Yep!] Vinyl replies, smiling. [Connor, this is Octavia, my Player 2. Tavi, this is Connor. He's our Guide.]

[Hello, Octavia!] Connor says, holding his hand out. I shake it, stepping through the door and taking a look around the house.

As appearances go, it's pretty spartan. There's only a small table and chair decorating the room, with a single torch providing any and all light.

[It's isn't much,] Connor says. [But it's home.]

A loud bang emanates from the floor above us, and I hear a gruff, deep voice call out, cutting through the ringing in my ears.

[Misfire! Sorry!] the voice says. [Won't happen again! At least, not on accident!]

Connor rolls his eyes.

[That's Dante.] He says. [He sells guns and ammo.]

Another voice, equally gruff yet somehow deeper, yells from upstairs.

[You'd better not be firing that stuff at the ceiling!]

Connor sighs.

[I swear, it's like those two never stop arguing...]

[I'll talk to them.] Vinyl says, jumping up through what looked like solid ceiling. I stare.

Connor laughs.

[Wood platforms.] he says. [You can jump through them and fall through them as well as stand on them.]

Soon, I hear Vinyl's voice ring out from upstairs, although I can't make out what exactly she's saying.
I hear footsteps, and Vinyl drops down through the ceiling.

Just then, an odd, genderless voice rings out through the house. It's so soft you almost can't hear it, yet it's so clear you can't help but do just that.

A horrible chill goes down your spine...

We all sit in silence for a minute or two.

[What was that all about?] I ask.

Vinyl grimaces.

[What do you remember from after the arcade?] she asks.

I try to remember...

[It's hazy at best.] I say. [I remember a white flash, then a voice, but I can't remember what it said.]

[I do.] Vinyl says. [It told us that we were here to save this world from something it's never seen before. Something from outside the games.]

[You might wanna sit down for this one.] Connor says, pulling the chair over to me. Grateful, I take a seat.

[They call it the Virus.] Vinyl says. [I'm not sure what it can do, but I know it's out to kill us and take over Terra Firma. And I know something else...]

Vinyl takes a deep breath and sighs.

[It's got the game itself on its side.]

[Then that message earlier...] I say, my mind racing.

[It's trying to summon something.] Vinyl says. [It's a giant worm called the 'Eater of Worlds'. It's big, it's nasty, and it wants nothing more than to see us all dead.]

I shudder. I've never liked worms.

[We have to go into the corruption and kill it, before it gets strong enough to summon it fully.] Vinyl says. [I don't have much armor, but it'll have to do. follow me.]

She steps over to what looks like an ordinary wooden floorboard and falls through it.

[I can never get used to that.] I say, staring at the space where she used to be.

[It operates on belief.] Connor says. [As long as you believe you'll fall through it, you will. But if you believe it'll hold your weight, then it'll do that too.]

I step over to the floorboard and visualize myself falling down through it. I take a step forward...

And land on hard earth.

[Not bad!] Vinyl says, grinning, as I brush myself off. [Here; put this on!]

Zone 1 - Level 3: Conversations

[Well, looks like you're all set!] Urist says, giving Vinyl and I an approving glance. [Now go blow up that Virus for me!]

[Will do, Demolitionist.] I say, grinning, as I pocket three sticks of dynamite.

[And this is for you, Vinyl.] Urist says, tossing a disk over to said friend, who is leaning against a wall, looking pointedly at the Arms Dealer. She catches it one-handed without looking, and gestures at me.

[I believe you have something for Tavi, Dante.] she says.

[Oh, right!] Dante says, rooting around in his pockets. [Here!]

He tosses a strange device and some small metal things to me, and I catch them, gazing at them in confusion.

[It's a Flintlock Pistol.] Dante says. [It holds six bullets - small pieces of metal that can penetrate anything at incredible speeds. It comes with 10 Quad Nine Bullets.]

[Quad Nine Bullets?] I ask, looking at the ten glowing cylinders of metal in my hand.

[Yep!] Dante says. [One of those is enough to insta-kill anything, hence the name Quad Nine! Just be careful with 'em, there're only ten.]

[We'll be off now.] Vinyl says. [Ready, Tavi?]

I nod.

[I'm ready.]

[Screams echo around you...]

As the second Shadow Orb breaks, I surface, taking large gulps of air as my head breaks the surface of the small pool of purple water I've been swimming in.

[What did you get?] the creature asks, floating just above the water along with two of its kind.

Again, I marvel at the little guy.
Turns out the things don't eat human flesh; they actually eat ebonstone, and... excrete it out as normal stone. Using this special ability, I'd been able to get to two of the Shadow Orbs - almost enough to summon the Eater of Worlds.

[I dunno.] I say. [I had to breathe. Give me a sec.]

I dive under the water, trying my best to see in the murky liquid.
I hear the familiar sound of not one, but two things entering my inventory, and I grin.
Two things, not one. That could only mean I got...
I surface, and confirm my suspicions.
My grin widens.
Just as I suspected, I now own a Musket and 72 Musket Balls.

[I got another weapon.] I say. [Now all I need is a few Fallen Stars, and we can move on to Phase II of my plan.]

[The potions, right?] the creature asks. I nod.

As I sit back down on the creature - I'd taken to calling him 'Buddy' - and he takes me back to the surface, I sigh and think about Tavi.
I hope the mobs in the overworld have been as nice to her as they've been to me, or she'll be in big trouble.
We enter a horizontal tunnel in the Ebonstone, and Buddy and his friends fall out of the air, tossing me off of them in the process.

[You guys alright?] I ask, getting to my feet.

[They're perfectly fine, 'Regicide'. Just deferential to a fault; this is how they honor their king.]

The voice that rips through my mind is deeper than anything I've ever heard before.
With it comes a presence; old, knowing, and...
Serene?

[Yes, serene.]

Great. it can read my mind.

[I can communicate with all life, young hero.] the voice says, and somehow I know it's smiling. [Whether or not it talks back is up to it.]

[Who are you?] I ask.

[You know me already. I'm what your kind refer to as the 'boss' of this area.]

The Eater of Worlds.
I didn't expect it to be nearly this friendly.

[And why would I not be? I live here under the sun same as you. I breathe the air of this earth, stale as it may be underground. I can feel joy.]

I can almost feel it laughing good-naturedly. The laughter soon fades.

[And I can feel sadness.]

A deep, clawing anguish tears at me, and I sink to my knees.

[My children are dying even as I speak.] The Eater of Worlds says. [The Virus has spread to even my sacred corruption.]

I feel sorry for the poor thing; trapped underground and forced to do nothing as something kills off its offspring.

[What can I do to help?] I ask instinctively. Nothing this sad should stay that way for long.

[Nothing as of yet. The Virus is too powerful. But when I am gone...]

The sadness in the Eater's voice fades, to be replaced by a pleading tone.

[Protect my children. They are all that matters.]

I smile.

[Will do, boss.] I say. [I just have two questions.]

[Ask away, dear hero.]

[How can you talk to me? I haven't broken the third Shadow Orb yet.]

[You think that my awakening is done all at once? No, it happens in stages. At the first Orb, I can see and hear through my children. At the second, I can speak. At the third...]

I nod.

[Second...]

I take a deep breath.

[What's a Regicide?]

The Eater laughs, and I laugh too.

[I'm serious, though.] I say. [What does the word 'Regicide' mean? I know it means I have to kill something...]

[I will tell you after you fully summon me, Regicide. For now, proceed with your plan.]

He knows about the plan?
Of course he does. He can read minds.

[Does this mean I still have to summon you?] I ask. [I don't know how much good it'll do; after all, I'm not going to kill the you now that I know you're a good guy.]

[Of course.] The Eater replies. [Even if you don't intend to end my rule, I'd still enjoy the feeling of the sunlight on me, and the sight of my beautiful home through more than the limited view my children-]

It stops.

[I-Is something wrong?] I ask, worried.

[The Virus. It's here.] The Eater says, with a combination of fear, surprise, and anger I didn't even think was possible. [You must drive it back, if nothing else, hero! Please!]

I nod. [Of course. Tell me where it is.]

[I cannot, only that it has set foot on sacred ground. You must find it yourself, and be careful.]

[Right.]

I turn to leave, but the Eater's voice cuts me off.

[You'll find a golden chest in a cave just above your position.] the Eater says. [You might find something helpful inside it.]

I thank him and look up at the ceiling, made of ebonstone.

[Buddy?] I call.

No answer.

[Children, aid the Regicide.] the Eater says. [You've been bowing for a long while now.]

Buddy flies up to my head and looks at the stone.

[The usual plan.] I say. [We need to get there quickly, but don't hurt yourself.]

Buddy flies up to the ceiling and starts burrowing into it, leaving a trail of normal stone behind him.
Placing more stone under myself to act as a standing point, I mine the ceiling out from above me, making my way slowly to the cave.

After what seems like an hour of digging, my head pops up into a small cave.
I jump out of the hole I'm in and look around for Buddy. He's lying on the ground.

[You alright, Buddy?] I ask.

[My gnaester hurts...]

I sigh.

[I told you not to hurt yourself.] I say, walking over to him and picking him up. [Are you gonna be alright?]

[I think so.] he says, flotating weakly above my hand.

[Go back home and rest.] I say. [It should be normal stone from here on in, and I wanna visit the overworld.]

[As you wish.] he says, floating back down the hole.

Looking around the cave, I spy what I've been looking for; a golden chest lying in a corner.
I rub my hands with glee and open it. Inside...
Is nothing.

What?

[You were looking for this?] a voice calls.

Mine.

Author's Note

Every alien creature should have a gnaester. It just sounds so wonderfully foreign, and so much like an internal organ.

Also, sorry for the long wait.

Zone 1 Boss: Confrontation

[You were looking for this?] Vinyl's voice calls from the hole.

She must have found The Virus, then. Just like she said.
I grin. Knowing Vinyl and her knowledge of video games, The Virus is in for a hard time.
My grin fades, however, upon hearing Vinyl's voice echo from the hole again.

[W-Who are you? And why do you look like me?]

[It doesn't matter, Virus.] Vinyl's voice says. [Tavi and I are gonna take you out before you can summon the Eater of Worlds.]

[Tavi? You know where she is?]

I hear a scuffling, and Vinyl's voice grows angry.

[Tell me where she is right now! I swear, if you've so much as touched her, I'll-]

[She's right above us.] Vinyl's voice says. [Tavi, come down here! I need your help!]

I obligingly jump down the hole Vinyl dug.
Why is Vinyl talking to herself?

As I land, I find out why...

There's another Vinyl, unarmed and unarmored, holding the real one by the front of her shirt with one hand, a fist aimed at her head with the other.

[There you are, Tavi!] Vinyl says. [I found The Virus!]

[What's going on!?] I say, confused.

There shouldn't be two Vinyls.
Is this what the Virus does? Is it some sort of changeling?

Immediately, the other Vinyl runs at me, but the real Vinyl brings her sword down, and the other Vinyl just barely dodges out of the way.

[I guess I'll have to take you out before I can go greet my best friend.] the other Vinyl says, scowling.

The real Vinyl laughs.

[Greet her? Kill her, more like. But don't worry, Virus. I've got just the thing for you.]

Vinyl reaches into what appears to be empty space and pulls out an anvil.

[Tavi and I were looking for an ingredient to create a weapon, and now we've got it,] she says, holding a strange blinking ball in her hand. [thanks to that golden chest over there.]

[What is it?] I ask, confused. Vinyl hadn't said anything about a weapon.

[Timed Proximity Mine.] she says, grinning. [A super-secret recipe.]

[Enjoy!] Vinyl shouts, tossing the explosive at the other Vinyl, who tries to run, only to be met with the barrel of my flintlock pistol.
The other Vinyl steps backwards, towards the mine, and tears form in her eyes.

[T-Tavi...] she says, her eyes pleading. [You gotta believe me. I'm the real Vinyl.]

[Don't listen to her!] Vinyl shouts. [She's trying to trick you!]

[Don't worry, Vinyl.] I say, aiming the pistol at the other Vinyl's head. This close, I can't miss, even though my arms are shaking. [I've dealt with changelings before.]

[Tavi, please!]

[Shut up!] I say. This is already hard enough without the changeling tugging at my heartstrings like this.

A small rumbling noise fills the cavern, and the disk suddenly disappears, to be replaced by a small monster, who's now beeping.

[Buddy! NO!]

[Goodbye, Regicide.] the monster says. [It has been an honor.]

And then, just like that, the monster is gone.

[BUDDY!] the other Vinyl screams, tears flowing down her face.

In an instant, the fake Vinyl flings herself at the real one, punching her full in the face and knocking her to the ground. The two roll around for a few seconds before the real Vinyl - her armor distinguishing her from the fake one - kicks the clone off of her and draws her sword.

[Any second now, that bomb's going to explode.] Vinyl says. [And there's nothing you can do to stop it.]

Odd.
It isn't like Vinyl to say things like that; to twist emotional knives.

I shake my head, clearing my mind.
Now's not the time to be calmly standing by and ruminating on Vinyl's character while she's in danger.

I aim the pistol, and fire...

And miss, as the bullet hits the wall next to the fake Vinyl's head.

She flinches, giving the real Vinyl time to dart in and smack her with the grip of her sword, forcing Vinyl into the exact same position she was in before; backed against the wall.

[You don't know what you've gotten yourself into, Virus.] the other Vinyl says, hatred in her gaze as she glares at the real Vinyl. [Buddy can move through the ground faster than you can imagine...]

[The Eater of Worlds has awoken!]

[And explosives break Shadow Orbs.]

Almost immediately, the floor explodes and a grey worm bursts through the room, screaming anger and hate as it barrels straight for Vinyl.

[Use the Quad Nine Bullets!] Vinyl says, rolling away just in time. [It's the only thing that'll stop it!]

Loading six glowing bullets into the flintlock, I take aim, and fire...

...As the other Vinyl grabs the gun and pushes it out of the way.

[There's no way I'm gonna let you kill him!] she screams, trying to force me to let go of the gun.

As I struggle with the fake Vinyl, her hand presses the trigger, and a loud bang rings through the cave.

An orange '9999' appears above the worm as it explodes into several pieces, all of which fall into the fake Vinyl's inventory as both of them are knocked back.
When the smoke clears, the real Vinyl's armor is gone, and her sword is lying on the ground in between them. They both glance at it.

There's a long silence.

[Well.] one of the Vinyls says. [I guess it's up to Tavi.]

The other one sighs. [It'd seem so.]

They both look at me, their eyes pleading.

I...
I can't tell which one is real.

[I don't know which one of you is The Virus.] I say, aiming the gun at first one, then the other.

One of the Vinyls looks around the room and spots the anvil.

[I'm going to cross the room and go to the anvil.] she says. [You can pick up that sword while I do so.]

Faster than I can see, on of the Vinyls dives towards the sword, while the other dashes to the anvil, presumably crafting something.
When the first Vinyl gets up from her roll, the other one is holding a purple blade that pulses occasionally with a soft purple light.

[Tavi.] the purple-bladed one says. [I want to explain something to you.]

[Go on.] I say. What's she getting at?

[Alright, so we know that this Virus isn't like us. It can shapeshift, so it doesn't have a real body, right?]

[Right...]

[So it stands to reason that it can't do human things like breathe, drink, or bleed, right?]

[NO!] the other Vinyl yells.

[Right...]

The Vinyl runs the purple sword across the palm of her hand, and blood starts to drip from it.

[And if I can bleed...] she says, grinning.

I aim my pistol at the other Vinyl, who's looking on with a mixture of shock, fear, and anger in her eyes.

[You clever, clever-]

I fire, but my aim's a bit off, and the bullet hits The Virus in the gut, blasting a small hole in its chest.

The Virus screams, growing long claws and lunging at me...
A blood-stained purple blade embeds itself in its head, and it disappears in a burst of pixels, leaving the sword and a chest behind.

Vinyl sighs in relief.

[Looks like you saved us in the end, King...] she says mournfully, gazing down at the sword on the floor. [And all I did was get you killed.]

I drop the gun, and run to hug Vinyl, who stands up to hug me back.

The worm was good, and I...

[I'm so sorry, Vinyl.] I say, tears in my eyes.

[It's not your fault.] she says, tearing up as well. [If I hadn't pulled the trigger...]

There's a long silence.

[I never did find out what a 'Regicide' was.] Vinyl says, chuckling sadly.

I look at Vinyl, confused.

[Regicide?] I ask.

[Yeah.] she replies. [The Eater called me 'Regicide', whatever that means. He acted like I was destined to come here.]

[Vinyl...] I say, looking down at the sword. [A regicide is someone who kills a king.]

Vinyl stands there for a few seconds, after which she drops to her knees.

[I...]

[Vinyl...] I say, a deep feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach.

[Are you telling me that I was destined to kill him?] she says, putting her head in her hands.

I just stand there. I can't imagine what she must be going through.

[T-That's bullcrap!] Vinyl screams. [I never asked for this! I never wanted to come here! I never wanted to...]

As I watch, trying to process all of this, Vinyl breaks down, crying freely into her hands.

After what seems like an hour, a small grey monster breaks through the floor.

[I've finally found you, Queen.] it says. Vinyl looks at it in horror.

[Q-Queen?] she asks.

[Yes. Your children are waiting for you down below. Forgive my intrusion.]

The creature burrows into the ground, disappearing.

[Queen?] Vinyl asks.

[Do you think we should follow it?] I ask.

[That explains why he was so serene...] Vinyl says, shaking her head slowly. [And why he asked me...]

Suddenly, Vinyl looks up, fire in her eyes.

[We're following it. Come on, Tavi.]

Vinyl jumps down the hole she must have dug to get to the cave, and down into the cave below. Following her, I see row after row of the monsters, all lying on the ground.

[All hail Regicide, Queen of the Corruption!]

Author's Note

Hoo boy!
What's it been, months?
Sorry.
I'll try to update more regularly.

Zone 1 End Cutscene

The Portal floats just above the ground, giving off a faint purple glow.
I sigh, and walk around the thing, examining the obsidian, the Hellstone, the swirling dark vortex that will, supposedly, take me and Vinyl home.

[Is is satisfactory, Judgement?] a nearby monster asks. I give it a last scrutinizing glance and nod.

[It is.] I say. [I'm going to go get Vinyl.]

The monster flies away, and I grapple onto a nearby ledge, pulling myself into a small tunnel that stretches all the way to the surface. By grappling onto the walls and jumping up, I slowly make my way to the top and breathe in the (relatively) clean air of the surface.
I walk along the Corruption, avoiding carefully the thorns and pits that mark the landscape. Soon, a slime approaches.

[I'm here for Vinyl.] I say. The slime wobbles slightly, as if confused.

[The 'Regicide'?]

No response.

[Another Player like me. She'd have come through here a while ago.]

Most likely sobbing, I add mentally. From the time the monsters had made her their queen, she'd been crying. I simply didn't know what was wrong with her. It was just a game, after all. Soon, we'd be home, and we could forget about all of this.

The slime bounces in place and heads in the direction of the house I'd stayed at with the Virus and the Guide.

The house comes into view, and I see a group of slimes gathered around the front door, which is shut. I can just see Vinyl's head through one of the windows.

['Bout time, Tavi.] Vinyl says. [Come in. Don't let any of the slimes in with you. They get everywhere; it's not pretty.]

I approach the door, and Vinyl's arm grabs me by the shirt and pulls me in. I step inside and take a good look at my friend.
Vinyl's hair is ragged and dirty, and her clothes aren't much better, although I shouldn't be talking - several days in the Corruption does unpleasant things to one's attire - and her eyes are wild and sunk back into her head.

[Vinyl...] I begin. [You know how the monsters that live in the Corruption can go through the earth?]

Vinyl tenses up, but nods.

[Well, they found something. A Portal. It leads out of this world. We can finally go home.]

Vinyl stays still for a few seconds before wrapping me into a hug.
[Thank you, Tavi.] she says. She doesn't have to say anything else. I know how hard it must have been for her. She always did get too wrapped up in things like video games.

Soon, we're both in front of the Portal, a large crowd of monsters floating behind us.

[Regicide?] one of them asks timidly. [We know we haven't been the subjects you've wanted us to be, but we've tried as hard as we can. Please reconsider?]

Vinyl looks at the thing, her face unreadable.

[No,] she replies. [I'm going home. I never wanted to kill your leader. I didn't want to be your Queen. I just want to wake up tomorrow back in my bed where things are normal.]

She steps through, and I shrug, preparing to go in after her. One of the monsters stops me.

[Judgement, we have a gift.] it says. [For you and the Regicide.]

Two monsters approach, bearing the purple sword Vinyl had made from the Eater of Worlds and what looks like a giant purple hammer.

[The blade is for the Regicide.] the monster says. [The Breaker is yours.]

[What's the breaker?] I ask. [Is it that giant purple hammer?]

[The Breaker is an unsacred warhammer forged in darkness and the depths of the earth. It excels at rending flesh and shattering bone.] the monster says, a hint of pride in his voice.

[So it's this giant purple hammer.] I say, picking the weapon up. It glows a soft purple and is oddly light. I give it an experimental swing. [I like it.]

[Fare thee well, Judgement!] the monster calls, flying away. [May your travels bring you and the Regicide peace!]

I turn, take a deep breath, settle the sword in my inventory and the hammer on my back, and walk through the portal.

Somewhere across the Arcade

Garen leapt from the thick undergrowth, flinging himself into a high-speed spin, sword held out in front of him and a scream on his lips. His target, a small purple yordle with a red hat and a large stick, turned and ran at the sight of him, her companion fairy following closely behind.

"Honestly," Thresh mused from a nearby bush. "It's almost like he enjoys killing that one."

His thoughts were cut off when Garen approached, still screaming 'Demacia!' at the top of his lungs. He readied his trusty chain, twirling it around in anticipation. It had been a good match so far; they were up two Dragons and twenty kills, and they'd reduced the enemy team's defenses until they were down to their inhibitor turrets. There was only Baron to defeat, and then victory was only a matter of time.

Garen got close to the bush, and Thresh sent his hook almost lazily through the air, catching the Demacian warrior and pulling him into the brush.

"Boo." Thresh said as he activated his chain's second ability, sending the spectral warden flying towards Garen. Once he arrived, he swept his chains across the ground, forcing Garen towards his teammate.

"Transmogulate!" Lulu cried, firing a blast of magic at Garen and turning him into a small, furry animal. The creature ran around for a few seconds, Thresh and Lulu both attacking it repeatedly, until it turned back into Garen, who promptly slammed his sword into Thresh, causing a giant blade to fall from the sky and onto the Chain Warden.

Thresh began to retreat; his health was low, and Cho'Gath was nearby. If he could just get to him, then they could turn on Garen and it would be another kill for their team.
His plans were foiled when another yordle, this one wearing a green hat and brandishing a blowpipe, appeared from somewhere beside him and began shooting him with blinding darts.

"Curse that passive!" Thresh yelled, casting his lantern over a nearby wall, hoping that Cho'Gath was near enough to reach it.

His hopes bore fruit when a robotic behemoth flew towards him, a Rupture already popping the hapless Teemo into the air.

After a quick hook, Teemo's health dropped, and Thresh turned back to Garen, the sound of chomping behind him telling more than anything else what had happened to the poor yordle.

Lulu shrunk back to normal size, Garen's corpse falling at her feet, and grinned.

"And they say Teemo's the one with the global taunt." she said, giggling. "That poor Demacian can't seem to stop going after me. Maybe it's because I keep turning him into a squirrel..."

Thresh gestured to the nearby alcove in the stone walls that guided River on its way through Summoner's Rift.

"Come on, Lulu." he said. "Baron's about to spawn."

Cho'Gath joined the Chain Warden as he and Lulu waited for the rest of their team to show up. Soon, Lee Sin and Jinx appeared, rounding a corner.

"Baron in ten." Jinx giggled. "You boys - and yordle - ready?"

"First Baron of the new Rift?" Lulu replied. "You bet!"

Ten seconds passed, and a circular hole in space appeared, floating off of the ground and glowing purple.

"Here it comes!" Lee Sin yelled. "Ready yourselves!"

Soon, a figure fell from the portal, but it looked nothing like the colossal purple monster that was Baron Nashor. It had blue hair, a white shirt, and was screaming as it fell.
A few seconds later, another human fell from the Portal, the rift in space closing behind her as she fell next to her friend.

[Purple Team has slain Baron Nashor!] the game proclaimed, and sure enough, the familiar purple aura enveloped Thresh, Lee Sin, Jinx, Lulu, and Cho'Gath.

"What just happened?" Thresh asked, after the initial shock had worn off.

"These two new organisms seem ripe for consumption." Cho'Gath said menacingly. "Initiating Murder.exe in 5..."

"I don't think they're enemies..." Lee Sin said, walking up to the two prone forms. "And besides," he continued. "Blue team's started a surrender vote. See?"

Jinx giggled at the unintentional joke the blind monk had made, and gestured to the small window floating in everyone's peripheral vision:

[Enemy team agreed to a surrender with 4 votes for and 1 against!]

After a few seconds, a small window appeared, showing the enemy Nexus exploding.

As the word 'Victory' appeared in the sky, everyone - the two strange humans included - disappeared.

Author's Note

Woo! We're back, baby!
Updates should flow a bit more regularly; I've cleared up a lot of real-life problems, and I'm ready to start writing again!