"WOOHOO!" shouted Rainbow Dash as she darted through the air at astonishing speed. She zipped around, left and right, leaving a rainbow trail behind her. She dove down through the air towards the ground in an attempt to almost hit the ground but swoop back up. She saw the ground getting closer and closer as she dove further down. But she went a little too fast, and she hit the ground head first, cracking her head open and dying.
YOU ARE DEAD flashed on the screen of Rainbow Dash's GameColt. "Argh, I died again! This game stinks!" she shouted as she flew through the air, distracted by her game. However, since she was distracted, she didn't know where she was flying, and then she crashed into Derpy by accident.
"Oops, my bad!" said Derpy as she looked down at Rainbow Dash falling down on her back.
Rainbow Dash screamed as she fell down through the air, closer and closer to the ground. It was for real this time, and she didn't have any extra lives. She looked as Cloudsdale got smaller and smaller as she fell down through the air. Since her back was facing the ground, she couldn't see the what was below her, so she didn't know when she would hit the ground. "I hope it's water!" she said, terrified and worried.
Applejack was pulling a cart of her apple pies when she heard a scream getting louder and louder, as if somepony was falling through the air. "What in tarnation?" said Applejack, looking up. For a split second she saw Rainbow Dash falling, before all her pies were ruined.
"Ow, my tail!" said Rainbow Dash, lying in a cart full of squashed apple pies.
"Rainbow Dash?" said Applejack, "What are you doing here?"
Rainbow Dash looked at Applejack and painfully moaned, "I had an accident." and then passed out.
***
Rainbow Dash opened her eyes and saw that she was in a hospital bed. "uggghhhhh" she groaned as she woke up.
As Rainbow Dash tried to remember what had happened, Nurse Redheart came in. "Well, your coccyx has made a full recovery!" she said.
"My what?" said Rainbow Dash.
Then Nurse Redheart explained, "Your tail's all better, see, it's really quite amazing. It took three hours to put it all back together. We actually ran out of staples and had to use a glue stick. You're a a pretty lucky mare indeed. But from now on, Id like you to be more careful. One more injury like that and you could wind up like Raindrops over there in the Iron Flank." Rainbow Dash looked across the room and saw Sunshower Raindrops, her flank in some big metal machine.
"Hahaha, that tickles!" giggled Raindrops as the Iron Flank tickled her flank.
"You want me to go in... THERE?" shouted Rainbow Dash.
"Yep, if you get another injury." said Nurse Redheart.
"Can I still go outside and be active and stuff?" asked Rainbow Dash.
"Yes, you'll be fine. Just try not to get injured again for the next few weeks, alright?" said Nurse Redheart, smiling.
"Ok, ok." said Rainbow Dash. "Can I go now?"
"Yes you may" said Nurse Redheart.
Rainbow Dash got out of bed and walked out of the hospital. "Now, don't get injured, Dashie!" Rainbow told herself.
All of a sudden, Rainbow Dash heard somepony say, "Look out!" and Scootaloo whizzed by Rainbow Dash on her scooter, nearly hitting her. Rainbow Dash quickly dodged it, avoiding another injury.
Rainbow Dash walked past a few little fillies playing gridiron. She watched as one of the fillies was tackled, resulting in another injury. Rainbow Dash flinched at the sight of it. "Hey Rainbow Dash!" shouted one of the fillies, "wanna play with us?"
Rainbow Dash, terrified of being injured again, shouted "NO!" and flew away. But she feared that if she flew, she might crash again, and then she would have to experience the feeling of the Iron Flank. So she flew slowly and carefully, staying away from other pegasi in fear of accidentally crashing into one of them again. After many minutes of slowly flying, she finally got home. She went inside, ran up to her room, and hid under her bed, terrified of another injury. For she had to stay indoors all the time. For the rest of her life.
***
Applejack was walking over to Rainbow Dash's cloud house. "Hmmm, gotta see how Rainbow Dash is doin'. I ain't been hearin' from her for the past couple of days. She walked up to Rainbow Dash's cloud house and peered into her bedroom window. "Hello?" Applejack shouted, "Are you there, Dash?"
Rainbow Dash came to her window and looked down. "Yeah, I'm fine!" she shouted back.
"Come on out now! It's a beautiful day!" Applejack shouted.
"Nah, I'll stay inside." said Rainbow Dash, and she went back into her room. She took a seat down and talked to her new inanimate friends. "Well Mr. Sunflower, how's it going?" said Rainbow Dash to a flower pot. "Oh, really? That's cool. What about you, Tank?" she told her pet turtle. "Really? Me too."
Applejack walked away from Rainbow Dash's cloud house. "Darnit, she'll never come out." she said. Pinkie Pie came walking by. "Hi Pinkie" she said.
"Hey Applejack, what's up? Have you heard from Rainbow Dash at all?" said Pinkie.
Nope, she's still in her house" said Applejack. "I doubt we'll be seein' her anytime soon."
"Really? She's GONE?" Pinkie asked worriedly.
"Yes, unfortunately." said Applejack.
"OH NO! OH NO! OH NO!" shouted Pinkie. "WE'LL NEVER SEE HER EVER AGAIN! WHAT IF THERE'S AN EMERGENCY? WHAT IF THE ELEMENTS OF HARMONY NEED TO UNITE? WHAT WILL HAPPEN THEN?"
"Hey, please stop screamin'" said Applejack. "Just calm down. We haven't had to wield the Elements of Harmony since we stopped Discord."
"BUT RAINBOW DASH IS GONE!!!!!!!" screamed Pinkie Pie.
"Just calm down. We'll find a way to get her back."
"Really? How?"
"We'll just think of something that will get her to come back out. What do you suggest?"
"Hmmm, I've got a lot of ideas!" said Pinkie. "Let's start off with the first one!"
"Ok, what is it?"
"A PARTY!" cheered Pinkie Pie, bouncing in the air.
"No, that we can't do that. To throw a surprise party at her house, she must leave her house first, something she doesn't wanna do."
"Why not?" asked Pinkie.
Applejack explained, "Because Rainbow Dash got hurt, and she fears that if she gets hurt again, she'll end up in... THE IRON FLANK."
"Oh no, not the Iron Flank!" said Pinkie Pie in fear. "I've been in that thing before, and I'm never, ever going back in there."
"I doubt she'll get hurt again. She's just got paranoia. If we get her to do something fun outside, I bet she'll finally come back out!"
"And that's when I hit her, right?" said Pinkie, holding a sledgehammer.
"Oh, no. But let's see what we can do."
***
Rainbow Dash was reading in her room when she heard the bouncing of springs outside. She walked over to the window and saw Applejack and Pinkie Pie jumping on a big trampoline.
"Hey Rainbow Dash!" yelled Applejack, "Come jump on this trampoline with us! It's fun!"
"WHEEEEHEHEHE! This is so fun!" exclaimed Pinkie Pie as she jumped.
"Nah, I'd rather just stay inside and read." said Rainbow Dash, and she walked away from the window.
"Darn it" said Applejack, "she still won't come. We have to think of something else, Pinkie. Think of something!"
"Oh, I've got one!" said Pinkie.
Rainbow Dash was still reading in her bedroom when she heard the mailslot open. She walked downstairs and saw that she had a letter. She picked it up. It was from Pinkie Pie. She opened the envelope and saw that the letter had been written in what seemed like red ink. "Dear Rainbow Dash, please come to Sugarcube Corner to make cupcakes." she read aloud, before crumpling up the letter and throwing it out. "I'm sick of everypony tricking me!" said Rainbow Dash. She went back up to her room and began reading again.
Pinkie Pie and Applejack looked up at Rainbow Dash's house. "She still ain't comin'." said Applejack, bummed. "We need to think of something else."
"Like what?" asked Pinkie.
"Well, do ya still have that suit?" asked Applejack.
"Why yes, I do!" said Pinkie Pie, and they walked away, ready to unleash their master plan.
***
Rainbow Dash was sitting at the table, staring at a coffee mug when she heard screaming going on outside. "Huh? What's that?" wondered Rainbow Dash as she walked over too the window to see Applejack being chased by Pinkie Pie, who was wearing a changeling suit.
"Aaaa! It's Queen Chrysalis! Save me Rainbow Dash!" screamed Applejack.
"Raaaah, I want your love!" shouted Pinkie Pie, chasing Applejack around in circles.
"This is you saddest attempt yet." said Rainbow Dash, rolling her eyes. "Everypony knows that that's the same changeling costume Pinkie wore for Nightmare Night last year!"
"No, really!" shouted Applejack, "You gotta come save me!" Just then, Pinkie Pie came walking by. "Hey Applejack, who's your friend?" Pinkie asked.
Applejack got confused. "But... nut you're supposed to be in the changeling suit!" she said.
"I am in the changeling suit." said Pinkie in the changeling suit, and she took off the mask. "I thought I was doing a very good job!"
"If you're Pinkie, then who's that?" said Applejack.
Just then, the other Pinkie unzipped her face, and out popped HARRY S TRUMAN!
"OH NO! IT'S HARRY TRUMAN!" screamed Applejack.
"Huh?" said Rainbow Dash from her window.
Harry Truman ripped off the costume and pounded his chest, barking like a seal. Then her grabbed Applejack and Pinkie Pie and threw them into a bag and started banging it on the ground a bunch of times. He sat on them and bounced around, and then he punched them a few times. Applejack and Pinkie Pie screamed in pain as the angry politician tortured them. Rainbow Dash just watched in horror.
"This is EXACTLY the kind of thing I was talking about!" shouted Rainbow Dash down, in hopes that they could hear her through the bag. Rainbow Dash turned to cookie and Mr. Sunflower. "Well, they were asking for it. It's not like I didn't warn them about the dangers that lurked outside. Yes, cookie, I know they're two of my best friends ever, but I told them, I wasn't going outside no matter what. I know, Tank. If I was out there, bagged by an ex-US President, Applejack and Pinkie Pie would risk anything to save me. And I've got to do the same for them."
Finally, Rainbow Dash walked downstairs, towards the door, and then, she walked outside. "I'm outside again! Nothing in Equestria can stop me now!" she shouted right before Harry Truman grabbed her. "Too late to go outside again?" she asked herself, and then Harry Truman broke her tail again. "It's too late. Pinkie? Applejack?"
"Yes?" said Pinkie Pie, still inside the bag.
"I'm sorry I caused all this." said Rainbow Dash. "I'm not scared of the outdoors anymore. But I'm also terrified of ex-US Presidents."
"Ah, that's okay, Rainbow Dash." said Applejack. "We are too."
"You know what I don't understand though? Didn't Harry Truman die in 1969?" asked Rainbow Dash to herself, and then Harry Truman's eyes widened.
"Oh no!" roared Harry Truman. "George, they're on to us!" he yelled, and he ran over too his homie, George Marshall.
"Let's get outta here!" said George Marshall, and Harry Truman jumped on his back. Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Pinkie Pie watched as George Marshall spread his arms and flew off into the sunset.
THE END.
Four Bronies sat on the couch with confused looks on their faces. "They really need be careful on which new writers they hire." one of them told the others.
"Agreed" said another Brony, and then he turned off the TV.
