Time for a PAYDAY

by Dycerton

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, Crossover, Random, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 8142

Bain gives the crew a once in a lifetime job that would make them rich(er), but in their escape, what they were paid to steal goes haywire. Now they're stuck in Equestria. Only thing for them to do is get back to work.

"Hey guys, I've got a job for you…"

After rescuing Hoxton from prison, Bain gets a call from a client offering them a job. To steal a military prototype no less. Apparently, delicate machinery and missiles don't mix…

Twilight Sparkle thought her night would be the best of her life. She would be able to catch up with her mentor and idol, Applejack would be able to raise money for the Apple family by selling her food, Rarity would get to meet her prince, Rainbow Dash would get to spend time with her idols, Fluttershy would get to see the flora and fauna of the gardens, and Pinkie could… do whatever she does.
Now, she was laughing with her friends and princess as they thought about how badly the night could have gone otherwise, not knowing it was about to get way worse.

Crossover with PAYDAY 2 (after they get the original Hoxton back) with bits of PAYDAY: The Heist (like three weapons).

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-20 02:09:15 UTC

Brave New World (Edited/Revised)

"Ok guys. I've got a job for you, take it or leave it. Our client wants us to steal some military prototype. He didn't tell me what it was, but he payin' biiiiig money for it. Remember that server we stole for $25 Mil? Well he's gonna give us $1 BILLION EACH for this thing! He has already planned the job, he just needs guys who won't fuck up, that's why he wants us. If you guys wanna do it, I'm going along with you. I will set up the escape van so that it will basically be a portable safe-house, complete with yours truly. What do you say?"

Dallas looked around at the others. Hoxton was fidgeting with with 'his' watch (that he found in a jewelry store, beside a broken display case). Chains was looking at his arms that were crossed on the table with a look that said he was considering it. Wolf looked almost ecstatic at the mention of the job.

"Taking military tech won't be easy, what else do we have to go on Bain?" Dallas asked the mic on that table.

"I've run a background check on this guy. He's not kidding, you wouldn't believe the shit he's done to get where he is. He's basically the guy who runs our little world, behind the curtains of course. His 'superiors' stopped listening to him and have started growing spines, he wants this so he can show them who he is again. He has all the specs on the place. It's also down south, Caribbean area, more specifically, on an island in the middle of the Bermuda Triangle. He has a boat ready for us, he is supplying a van - an armoured transport van no less - that I will be in ready to take you guys away and direct you into the complex. We have plans A through C. Plan A, we go in stealthy, get it get out, no questions asked as long as we get it. Plan B, you get in, turn the alarms and cameras off, then grab everything you can wrap your hands on. I heard they keep that place stocked with some good quality gold. Plan C, go in, break everything, grab everything, get out. Not the best in way of planning, but he said it would work with some new gadgets he's gonna give us if we accept. Anything else?" Bain asked.

The four-man-army looked at each other with gleams in their eyes.

"I'm in!" Wolf said with a toothy grin.

"New toys are always fun to play with. Chains’ in." Chains said, sitting upright in his chair with his hands behind his head. A confident smirk present on his face.

"Wad'ya think Dallas? Wanna give it a go?" Hoxton said in his British accent. "I've always wanted to go to the Caribbean anyway. I'm in."

"Well then, looks like ya got your answer Bain. We're in,” Dallas said leaning his elbows on the table. “Now, what's the deadline for this thing?"

"ASAP. He wants this thing done soon, he didn't give any specifics. Just call him when you're ready and he'll tell you what to do next. Glad to see you guys in action so soon after our last hiccup with those paintings. I will send your new gear to you guys. I assume you will be taking your usual roles?"

"I ain't letting anyone touch MY turrets." Wolf said leaning back into his chair, crossing his arms over his chest while the others chuckled.

"Wolfy won't let any of us near his precious little meat grinders. So Chains think we're doing the usual." Chains said, stifling his chuckles.

"Got it. I'll have your new gear sized and sent. I hope you like it gents. I'll see ya real soon." Bain finished before the connection was severed.

Hoxton lightly laughed. "Somehow I feel like he picks the toughest bloody jobs for us."

"It wouldn't be fun if it was easy now would it, Hox?" Dallas joked.

"Yeah, you’re right." Hoxton checked his watch, suddenly becoming panicked. "Shit! I'm late! I'll be back here in a few hours, or not." Hoxton said getting up.

Wolf gained a sly grin. "New broad? Or new bitch?" They laughed, remembering Hoxton's last few failed attempts at getting dates.

"Neither. Clara and I have been going out for a couple of weeks now. Why else did you think I was leaving early?" Hoxton asked, going over himself in a mirror in the decorated basement of their safe-house. The three of them looked at each other, Wolf with a stupid grin on his face, Dallas looked like he was holding in laughter and Chains looked like he was genuinely thinking about his answer.

"I thought you were wasting yourself." Wolf broke the silence.

"Pretty much." Dallas added, regaining himself.

"Chains didn't really notice you left, sorry." Chains said while the others laughed.

"Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, at least I have a girlfriend." Hoxton said going up the stairs. "Call me if we need anything."

"Don't get carried away Hoxtotron, we have work in the morning." Dallas said as Hoxton went through the front door.

Their safe-house wasn't the biggest, but it was big for a normal house. Three floors and a basement. Top for Hoxton, second for Chains, ground for Dallas, basement for Wolf. Wolf, being the technician, needed space for his tests. Hoxton got the top because he was the sharpshooter. Chains got the second floor because he would have time to get his stuff on in case the cops found them. So that left Dallas the first floor. It didn't stand out, because they had chosen to have the house built in one of the more wealthy districts. They were just happy to get the house built and set up without any problems.

"Well, I say...three days? Yea, I give them three days. Dallas?" Wolf snickered.

"I'd say a good week, maybe two seeing as how he thinks it will last. Besides, this is a record for him!" Dallas joked as the man in question walked to his respective floor.

Chains huffed in amusement. "No wonder we wear clown masks. So,” he pulled out a large deck of cards from a bag nearby. “Anyone up for poker?"

It was a stormy night on the military base. Several guards protecting the entrance, watching over the area to see if anyone dared to come close, when four armed robbers decided it was the best time to go hunting.

"Alright, I'm heading into the security room now." Hoxton whispered over his com.

"Good, once you're done with that, Dallas and Wolf will come get you. You guys ready?" Bain asked over their radios.

"Yeah, we're ready. Chains is ready to clean up after us too." Wolf said. "You know where we are Hox, open the door for us. Bain, you got the location of the gold?"

"You bet, it's even on your way out from the tech safe. That along with the tech will make a nice payday, but if it gets too hot in there, leave it." Bain said concerned. "We don't need to get greedy."

"Would we even have this job if we weren't?" Dallas retorted.

"Point taken, now cut the chatter. We still have a job to do."

Dallas and Wolf were in their Improved Combined Tactical Armor, and waiting outside the military warehouse for Hoxton to open the doors. Hoxton was wearing the regular Combined Tactical Armor to move around quieter and easier. Chains, unlike the rest, got a new set of armor.

"Hey Chains, enjoying the new suit?" Wolf asked.

One of the new 'toys' sent to them - courtesy of Gage - was a black Bulldozer blast suit. He left the helmet out though, as he preferred to keep his mask on. "Hell yea. It's heavy, but strong." Chains answered with gusto.

They also got the best weapons for their roles. Chains had a LMG with his tank armor, Dallas had an assault rifle, Wolf had a shotgun, and Hoxton with his sniper rifle. They all had silenced pistols. Wolf had his grenade launcher along with his turrets. Chains came with an assault rifle strapped to his back and extra ammo for both of them. Dallas had an SMG as his secondary and two medi-bags. Hoxton took a Locomotive shotgun along with his ECM Jammers.

"Alright, I've set up my jammer on the security systems, they're all yours Bain." Hoxton whispered, getting back to the door of the security room. "I count...five snipers...two bulldozers...I can see a taser, two guards and a shield close to the door in front of you. Try and keep it quiet will you?"

"We'll try." Dallas said getting his pistol out and readying himself to push the door open. "Mark 'em and we'll get 'em."

"Ok, I got the cameras. Keep it quiet, and we get out unscathed as rich men. That door's unlocked. Happy hunting."

Dallas opened the door and saw the taser talking with the guards while the shield looked asleep. Dallas motioned with his head for Wolf and Chains to move in. They silently shut the door behind them and each took aim at one of the three. Dallas moved his fingers to count down. 'Three...two...one...now'. They each took a shot, catching the bodies before they could drop and alert the others. They silently pulled them out of the way while Chains took out the shield, disposing him the same way.

"Alright, you guys are in, no alarms yet. I've marked the safe in the head scientist's office. Also, the gold is in the big metal crates on your way out, bag as much as you want, but be careful. I called the chopper, it will be on standby for your signal once you get into the cage."

"Dallas, with me. Let's go see what they have in that office of theirs." Hoxton said, staying low as he climbed the stairs with Dallas in tow.

The warehouse was big, but had research labs and offices all around the walls. Other than that, it looked like a massive concrete and steel base.

"Bain, can you unlock the office door?" Dallas asked, examining the door they needed to get past.

"Gimme a sec.” The com went silent for a moment until the door clicked. ”Got it." Dallas pushed it open to reveal an office. It wasn't too fancy, but had a desk off to one side with a long device with multiple glass beakers attached, each one had a cube floating in them.

"The fuck is that thing?" Hoxton asked, eyeing the device.

"What? Wait, I'm looking through your camera...Whoa, what the hell is that? It might be valuable, but if we don't know what it is then we can't do shit with it. Keep going."

In the back of the room was a large safe. It looked like it was made of steel, and built into the building. The lock had three different screens with slots for cards under them, each was blue with the words 'INSERT KEY CARDS'.

"We have the safe, but it needs three separate key cards to open it. Any ideas?" Hoxton questioned, examining every nook and cranny of the door.

"Drill will draw attention, you can't pick the lock or hack it, it won't work without something to be in the key card slots, and fucking around with it will probably kick the alarm into gear. Is the safe secure?" Bain asked.

"Yeah, it looks like it was made with the wall." Hoxton huffed, frustrated. "We can't just cut through either."

"Uhh, let me think." Bain was quiet for a moment. "Ok, there still should be a scientist or two around, four haven't checked out yet. You have to stay quiet though! Each room has a panic button, so keep their mouths shut and away from the intercom."

Hoxton raised his sniper rifle and scanned the rooms around the building through the scope. "Got one. Room 316, third floor, far side." He lowered his rifle quickly when he heard one of the doors closing near him. Dallas quickly got back into the office and peered out.

"I got one, just left his office. Hoxton, follow him, Wolf, cut him off." Dallas ordered motioning his head to the scientist in question. This was met with affirmatives as they stalked the oblivious scientist.

Wolf slapped Chains' arm and pointed to the gold crates with a nod. Chains nodded back and stood by the crates while Wolf slowly made his way to the stairs. He hid on the landing the scientist was heading towards, waiting for the right moment.

When the scientist came around the corner, Wolf whipped him in the head with his pistol, with Hoxton catching the scientist and covering his mouth. "Wanna stay alive? Then stay put." Hoxton whispered harshly to the scientist who nodded vigorously, scared for his life.

Wolf searched the lab coat and found the card. He tied the scientists hands and gagged him while Hoxton dragged him behind some crates, next to where Chains stood. "One down, two to go." Wolf said giving the card to Hoxton. "Hey Dallas, you still in the office with the safe?"

"Yeah." Dallas answered through the radio, sinking deeper into the office to keep himself hidden.

"See if you can find a card in there, it will make our jobs easier."

"Got it." Dallas searched through the desk while Wolf and Hoxton made their way to the other scientist they saw. "I found one in the desk. Watch out, there is a guard in front of the other occupied office; sniper."

"No problem." Hoxton said, taking aim with his pistol from the stairs at the sniper in front of the office. He shot, but they couldn't get to him in time. He dropped and his pager went off.

"Hey, what's wrong? You dropped you pager... Hello?" The officer at the other end of the radio said.

Wolf dragged the body away while Hoxton took the pager. "Nothing, nothing is wrong. Uh, I thought I heard something and turned, the clip on my pager broke and it fell. Everything is fine though, nothing at all wrong here."

"Mmmhmm, got it. Try to be a bit more careful next time." The officer cut the connection and Hoxton carefully put the pager back on the sniper, breaking the clip.

Wolf shot him a questioning glare through his mask. "Why'd you do that?"

"Wouldn't want to lie to him now, would we? We're about to make his life hell anyway." Hoxton chuckled darkly along with Wolf. "Bain, can you open the door?"

"Way ahead of you." The door clicked and they went in. The scientist heard the door click closed and woke up from his nap.

"Who's there?" He asked in a Russian accent. "I am giving you one warning, come out now!"

The scientist got up from his desk, putting his card into a drawer from his coat. He made for the door, but was stopped by Wolf bashing the back of his head, knocking him out. Wolf caught him and tied him up behind the desk. Opening the correct drawer, Hoxton took out the key card. Placing it in his pocket with the other, he motioned his head for them to leave. "We got it, let's get back. Chains, meet us with Dallas. Let's see what we were payed to get." Wolf nodded, Chains moving up the stairs to them while Dallas stood by the safe waiting for them.

Chains got there first and joined Dallas in waiting for the other two, arriving shortly after a minute. "You need to put the cards in at basically the same time. That will open it. What we're lookin' for should be the only thing in the safe." Hoxton gave one of his cards to Wolf and Dallas took his out.

"Chains, keep watch.” Chains nodded, taking a stand by the door. “Ok, on three. One, two, three!" Hoxton said as they pushed their cards in at the same time. The safe opened and they looked in to see their prize.

In the safe was a ring about the size of a head, with about ten spokes on the inside of the thick ring. Each ring had a bolt of electricity going from it to another floating cube, like the ones in the odd machine. The ring was mainly steel with a band of copper where the spokes were. Dallas reached in and picked up the device. "Bain, I think I know what that weird machine is." Dallas said, inspecting the ring.

"Yeah, I got an idea too. I can see the ring through your camera. I think the cubes are power cores or something, see if you can take a few with you. We might get a bonus. I'll run a check on whatever that thing is."

"Wolf, Chains, go back to the gold and bag it. I have a feeling the cubes here won't let us just take them." Dallas said. They nodded and left. "Hoxton, see if you can help me get one or two of these."

"Bain, is there an alarm on the glass case around the cubes?" Hoxton asked putting his pistol away and looking through the case.

"I have no clue. That case is a black spot in the security system, so either there isn't an alarm at all for it, or it is on a different system."

"Well, only one way to find out. Wolf, Chains, get ready if the alarms get tripped." Dallas said getting his assault rifle ready to bash the glass. "Three, two, one." He smashed the glass and sure enough, the alarm started blaring and the lights turned red.

"FUCK IT!" Wolf yelled as he blew the C4 on the metal crates. He shoved as much gold as he could into the four bags he had. "Chains! Catch!"

Chains turned and caught the bag of gold thrown at him. "C'mon, lets get out of here! Bain, I hope you have that van ready!"

"Don't worry, the cargo doors should be opening now, go through them, I'll pull up to get you guys then the rest is covered."

The large doors opened and they started running. Hoxton and Dallas caught up to Wolf and Chains and took a bag each, Dallas concealing the ring and spare cubes under his armor. They ran as fast as they could, dodging sniper shots and the sprays from the remaining guards pursuing them. Helicopters were coming in and dropping soldiers. Some of the choppers were taken out from some well placed shots from Hoxton and Chains. After running out in the open for a minute that lasted years, a large armored van pulled up and the doors flung open for them. Bain got out from his seat and went to the back of the van. From the robbers’ perspective, he was wearing a basic vest over his suit and a ski mask.

"COME ON!" Bain called, taking pot-shots at the police. The four of them piled in and the doors shut behind them. Bain went back to the driver's seat and took off. "You still got it?"

"Hell yeah." Dallas called pulling out the ring to show him, letting him admire the odd piece, before putting it back under his vest. The four of them put the bags of gold down and started celebrating with random shouts of joy. Wolf, alternatively and true to his name, howled, causing the others to laugh even more.

Wolf stood up from his seat and went to the front. "Is the ship still at the dock?"

"No, it left when I told them it wasn't going too peachy. Don't worry, we have a ride there." Bain turned back to the road and tuned the radio to his earpiece. "Shit! Assault comin' in! They aren't gonna let us get away easy!"

Wolf ran to the back of the van and looked out the windows. He furrowed his brow in confusion. He saw a jeep with a mounted gun, pointed at them but not firing, followed by three armored vans like their own. On top of each of the trucks was a sniper taking shots, trying to get the wheels, but missing when they hit a bump, they were held on by three ropes attached to a harness. He looked a little higher and saw something he dreaded. Four helicopters. It wasn't the choppers themselves that made him groan, it was the six cloakers, in each, that made him pissed. "Hoxton, when I open the doors, try and take out the snipers, or the choppers, I don't care just shoot at them got it?"

Hoxton got up and knelt by the doors, rifle pointed at the door. He turned to Wolf and nodded. Wolf brought out his grenade launcher and some C4 and opened the doors. Hoxton took the gunner that was on the jeep out and the driver swerved out of the line of fire. The army snipers tried getting shots off on them, but the road became more and more bumpy. Bain was taking them from the main road to the pick up point. Which meant a bit of off-road shenanigans.

Wolf took out one of the vans using his grenade launcher, and another with some C4 he threw on the ground. The last one's sniper was taken out by Hoxton with a shot through the scope, effectively vaporizing the military man's eyeball. Hoxton took aim at the choppers following them, he took a shot at the pilot of the lead one. It put a crack in the windshield, but it kept coming. "The glass is bullet proof!" Hoxton yelled to the rest of them. Chains went to the back and unloaded a full clip into the  chopper, managing to put more cracks into it and killing one of the cloakers, who fell to the ground, but not stopping it.

"Fuck! Ok, our ride's here! Get out there and hook the cable to the top of the van and we'll be out of here!" Bain called back, stopping the van. The four mercs got out of the van and slammed the doors behind them. They saw what they needed.

A black helicopter was on the ground the pilot was looking at them, a ski mask on his face like Bain. Dallas gave him a thumbs up, and the pilot set to starting the chopper, all the while the cloakers dropping around them. Chains was killing them with the ammo he got from the van. Hoxton was on the roof of the van, taking out some cloakers as they came, while connecting the cables to the four loops on the corners of the van, the cables being handed to him by Dallas. Wolf doing… whatever wolf does. The cables were attached and they hurried to get back into the van as more military started swarming them in jeeps and vans.

"LETS GO!" Dallas called through the radio.

"Got it! Hold tight!" The pilot called back. They heard the helicopter's motor accelerate and the bullets hitting the outside of the van. "FUCK!" The five heard the pilot swear, coupled with a gunshot from the radio.

"Fuck! The pilot's dead! Awww, FUCK!” Bain frantically said, realization striking him in desperation. “I'm the only one of us who knows how to fly that thing, aren't I?! AGH, if we survive this, you guys owe me BIG TIME!" Bain got out of the van and sprinted for the grounded chopper. Ignoring the blood on the driver's side window, he opened the door and pulled the body unceremoniously out of the cockpit and climbed in. The copilot's side window had a large hole in it from the shot that killed the previous pilot. Bain was sweating and panting beneath his mask as he put on the air mask and the headset. "Ok, I'm the chopper, let's get out of here!"

The crew felt the van lurch forward as it was lifted off the ground and headed towards the sea. The five of them panted and the ones who weren't restricted by an air mask took theirs off. "Well, we did it.” Wolf breathed a sigh of relief. “Gotta say, Best. Night. Ever." Wolf chuckled, bringing out a trigger for something. "Good thing I left them a little present."

He hit the trigger and even from where they were, they could still hear the explosion. And even through the storm outside, they each swore they could hear singing.

"I'm at the Grand Galloping Gala! It's all I ever dreamed!"

They didn't even bother asking if they heard it, they just thought they were individually crazy.

"Dallas, is the payload still good?" Hoxton asked. Dallas brought out the object in question. They recoiled at the change. Instead of the blue electricity, it looked like rainbows were coming from the spokes in the ring. But before they had a chance to question in the most vulgar way possible, Bain radioed them.

"GUYS, THEY'VE GOT JETS AFTER US!" This was followed by the sound of flares being released and the van tilting left, following the helicopter as it avoided the missile. The blast however wasn't avoided as much. It knocked them around the van and the device fell out of Dallas' grip and landed on the floor.

Right before Dallas landed on it.

As the van leveled out, allowing them to regain themselves. Their attention was drawn to a beeping noise, coming from the floor. Dallas looked down at the device. The rainbows were pulsing and the cube that used to glow blue was now pulsing red in time with the beeps.

"Awww, FUCK!" Wolf yelled as a red field spread out from the device and engulfed the van and the helicopter. The last thing they hear before blacking out was:

"That was the worst night ever...."

Twilight Sparkle, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Princess Celestia all left the doughnut shop laughing as they retold stories to one another. Mostly of all the bad things that had happened to them at the recent event.

Twilight looked back at the castle as they started making their way to the train station and stopped dead in her tracks. "Uh, Princess... What's that?" She pointed to a large red sphere moving above the castle.

The Princess turned away from her conversation with Fluttershy and looked to where Twilight was pointing. She raised a brow at the odd sphere. "I’m not sure Twilight…" She paused for a moment before turning to them. "We need to see what is happening at the castle, come on!" She said before teleporting the six of them outside the gates to the castle.

The seven mares barged through the gates and saw what was left of the ponies who didn't immediately leave after the disaster that was the Gala, all looking up at the red sphere, pupils as small as needles and mouths either agape or commenting.

They all perked up when they heard a voice boom from the sphere. The voice had an odd accent that none of them could place, but no matter how it was said, the meaning was clear.

They could tell that whatever did this was intelligent, male, and most obviously, not amused.

"Awww, FUCK!" Boomed all across Canterlot as the sphere flared and burst to reveal two metal objects, one was like a metal box with wheels, the other looked like a black bubble with a spinning blade on top of it. What looked like cable connecting the two snapped with a metallic 'twang' and the box fell while the bubble continued flying away almost drunkenly.

The ponies around where the box hit thankfully scurried out of the way, avoiding getting squashed. The box hit and shook the ground, bouncing a few times on its' wheels before settling in with the wheels pointed to the side.

The doors on one side opened and four large bipedal things tumbled out, along with a bag. The bag was slightly opened and all of the ponies gasped at what they saw shining inside. The bag was filled with gold, which caused some ponies to whisper among themselves about how it got there, how much it was worth, along with some more questionable things.

Three of the four beings stood up, the biggest one standing over the bag and its' slightly spilled contents. "Get the FUCK BACK!" He commanded, pointing a large black tube device that they could guess was a weapon at the nearest ponies to it.

Twilight noticed how the mouth didn't move when it talked, and she could see darker skin under the white clown face. She looked at the others and saw that two of them also had hair under their masks. Each of the masks was a different clown, and one of them didn't even look like a clown.

"Uh, guys... Why are we surrounded by small, technicolor, mythical horses?" The one with the animal-esk mask asked, looking back at the others while pointing its' weapon at any ponies that moved.

"I could use a medic-bag lads... Anyone got one?" The one that hadn't gotten up asked. He sounded strained and he flopped onto his back when he tried getting up.

The one with the red white and blue mask turned back from them to his injured companion and brought out a red box and opened it. "Hoxton, y'alright? What's wrong?"

"Dislocated shoulder I think, left one." 'Hoxton' replied. "To be honest I'm surprised that's it after that fall. Chains, Wolf, anything?"

"Nope... I said GET BACK!" 'Chains' yelled, pointing his weapon at a slow and not very stealthy pony who was trying to get closer, but quickly backed off.

"I'm good." 'Wolf' replied, the seven of them noted that he had the same accent as the one who yelled from the sphere. He walked closer to Chains and lowered his voice. The ponies could still hear him though. "I'm gonna see if my turrets are fine, teach these... things what it means to fuck with us, or our loot."

Wolf walked back to the box and went in. A loud pop was heard followed by a loud pained groan. "Ugh, bullet wounds, any day. Broken shit, meh, some time off. Dislocation, however, is a bitch." Hoxton groaned as he stood up. The one who had been helping him gave him a needle which he promptly jammed into his arm, followed by a sigh of relief. "Least we've got painkillers... Chains, want some 'elp with that?"

"If you're good, then sure. Wolf! Where are those meat grinders!" Chains yelled back.

Wolf stepped out, holding two odd machines, one under each arm and his weapons over his back. "These are still good." He said as he put them down, one at each side of the box. "Oh, Dallas, you dropped this." He said as he tossed a large ring to 'Dallas'.

Dallas caught the ring and looked at it. The ring was metal with spoke lining the inside and copper bands around it. "Where's the cube thing?"

"No clue, but I found some crystal dust stuff covering a bit of it when I found it in the corner. Maybe it burned itself out or something. At least we know what it does now..."

"Yeah, great..." Dallas muttered, storing the ring under his suit.

"What the fuck?! Hey, GET BACK HERE YA BASTARD!" Hoxton called out to a unicorn who had managed to steal one of the gold bars with her magic and was running away. "Dallas, throw me my rifle!"

Dallas grabbed the 'rifle' from where it had been dropped when Hoxton landed and tossed it to him. Hoxton leveled the end of the tube with where the pony was and pulled a trigger that his finger was resting on.

The resounding bang stunned every pony in the yard. When Twilight and the princess regained their senses, they joined the other ponies with shocked gasps.

The unicorn mare had been hit in her front right leg, and the shot traveled through both. She was now crying on her side, her bloody legs cradled in front of her as she sobbed and tried calling for help. Her pleas were the only noises made, other than the clicks made by the rifle as Hoxton brought it back to pointing at anypony close to him or the gold.

"Anyone else wanna try their luck? Chains won't aim-to-maim this time." He growled.

The assembled ponies took a few steps back as they started sweating, all but Celestia who stood with an unreadable expression.

"Dallas, d'ya mind getting that back? I think that shot did a number on my shoulder."

"Sure thing. Wolf, see if you can get the truck going." Dallas said before walking towards the downed and weeping pony. None of the ponies tried to stop him as they parted for him.

The mare's crying only strengthened when Dallas came closer, weapon ready but not aimed. "I-I'm s-sorry! P-please just d-don't k-kill me!" She wept as she tried to crawl away. Dallas simply picked up the gold and walked back, handing the bag to Hoxton as he passed him. Wolf came from the other side of the 'truck' with a toolbox and stowed it in the truck before he spoke.

"Engine seems fine, and most of the stuff's good, the shocks are pretty fucked though. The built these bastards to last." He said banging the truck's side.

"Good, now we can get out of here..." Chains muttered as Hoxton picked up the re-filled bag of gold and put it in the truck.

"Hold on a moment." All eyes turned to Princess Celestia. "I believe some things may need to be discussed between us. I need you to come with me." She turned and started walking to the doors to the palace.

"Aaaaand, who are you? And why should we care?" Wolf said unimpressed.

"I am Princess Celestia of Equestria." She answered simply.

She turned her head back to the four masked men. "I can have my guards," Who had just arrived from the castle and were tending to the injured mare, none of them gaining the courage to approach them. "Keep this, 'truck', safe while we talk."

The four huddled up and whispered among themselves. After a minute they left their circle and Chains and Wolf went to the truck and removed the gold bags before slamming the door shut.

"Fine, but we don't trust them with those." Dallas said, gesturing with his thumb to the bags of gold.

"Understandable. Please follow me. Guards, nopony is to come near the 'truck' other than my self, my sister or these four, understood?" Celestia asked.

"Yes, your majesty." A guard said before ordering the ones not needed for helping the mare to make a circle around the truck.

"Twilight, you and your friends can find some guest rooms here or leave for Ponyville," The slap of Wolf's clove against his mask was heard. "for the night."

Twilight looked to her friends who each looked a mix of worried, angry, quizzical, and frightened. "A good sleep would do us good. I remember where the rooms are, I'll take us there and meet you for breakfast in the morning."

Dallas leaned close to Wolf as he was handed a bag from Chains. "You turned the turrets off, right?" He whispered.

Wolf stopped helping Hoxton with his bag and turned his head to Dallas, the expression unreadable under his mask. "Oops."

Meeting the Locals

"Why are they wearing gold for armour?" Wolf muttered as they walked past another pair of guards.

"It is the signature sign of my royal guards." Celestia answered as the continued walking.

"But, is it real gold?" Wolf asked as he eyed a nervous looking guard.

"Of course." Celestia replied with a smile. "Even though the metal is not common, it makes a good impression as a military force."

"Like hell it does." Hoxton remarked.

Celestia stopped walking and sent him a questioning look. "Hoxton was it? What do you mean by that?"

"Ack, never mind. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough. D'ya mind if I asked where the armory would be? And/or the keys to said armory?" Chains slapped the back of Hoxton's head to shut him up.

Celestia eyed them cautiously. "And why would you want to see the armory?"

Chains spoke up before Hoxton could. "Chains would like to consider himself a military man. Chains could see how good your guards really are."

Celestia kept up her look for a moment before smiling and turning back around to continue walking. "Well I could have the captain show you a training session that is scheduled for tomorrow morning, would that suffice?"

Chains groaned inwardly, thankful for his mask that was concealing his glare at Hoxton. "Yea, sure."

"Excellent." Celestia finished as the came up to a set of large, golden, double doors. Dallas whistled at the doors as he thought about how much they would be worth.

Celestia opened the doors and walked in, the four of them staring in shock at what they just saw.

"Did-did she just?..." Wolf stammered.

"I think she did..." Dallas admitted. "Hey, uh, Celestia? How'd you do that exactly?"

She looked back at them. "My magic, of course."

Wolf couldn't decide whether to snicker or let his jaw drop past his mask. The others didn't take it much better. "Magic?..." Chains repeated, rolling the word over his tongue.

"Yes, magic. Does that surprise you? Those devices you carry seem to use propulsion magic to send projectiles, am I wrong?"

Before Wolf could laugh at her, Hoxton spoke up. "Not really, but it's close enough."

Celestia shrugged as she beckoned them into the throne room. They each silently marveled at the design, mostly the amount of gold used for decoration. Seated on the throne was a blue alicorn like Celestia, but the opposite in terms of coloring. She looked between the four men with curious yet suspicious looks.

"Who art thine companions, dear sister? We haven't seen beings such as them in our lifetime, or such odd masks." The blue one said standing up and walking down the small set of stairs leading up to the throne.

"You heard the commotion outside correct?" Celestia asked and she nodded. "Well, I believe it was a dimension gate, and somehow they got through without being destroyed by the power surge."

"Wait, wait, wait." Chains interrupted. "You lost Chains. Dimension what now?"

"I think she means the red bubble thing that came from this." Dallas said as he pulled the ring from within his armour. "Makes sense. We get hit by missile, missile knocks this thing away, thing gets damaged by completely unknown means, probably hitting the ground and nothing else, we get sent to Magic-Land-of-Ponies."

"Yea, sure, sense..." Hoxton said shaking his head.

"Guys? GUYS?! Ca--ou--hear me? Where the f---are you?" Their radios crackled to life as Bain's voice started coming through.

"Bain!" Dallas remarked, putting a finger to his earpiece to try and hear him better.

"Holy shit! You came through too! Welp, now we're fucked." Wolf pouted under his mask.

"Yea I'm here, I'm going to ignore your comment Wolf, for both our sakes. Any of you know where the fuck we are?"

"Magical-Land-of-Ponies." The four of them said in unison.

The radio was silent for a minute as Bain processed what they just said. "... I think I heard you wrong, damn radio must be damaged from the crash, can you repeat that?"

"Magical-Land-of--" They were cut off by Celestia.

"You're in Equestria, not 'Magical-Land-of-Ponies'."

"Yea, yea buddy sure." Dallas said quickly. "We'll explain everything when we regroup, it seems we're the only Humans here, and the inhabitants of this place are too nosy for their own good. Where are you?"

"After the cables snapped, I had enough fuel to land near this old castle in a forest. I'm hiding out here until something happens. Van still good?"

"Van's good, shocks are a bit busted, but not too bad. We can come by later on tomorrow to pick you up... Actually." Wolf looked to Celestia. "Could you send some guys to get him and the chopper?"

"Wait, who're ya talking to?"

"The princesses of Magical-Land-of-Ponies." Chains answered.

"...Ok then... What was that about sending guys to pick me up?"

They looked to Celestia who looked confusedly at them before realizing she was asked a question. "Oh, yes. I could have some guards pick up that flying machine and your friend." They scoffed at her choice of words.

"He's not so much a friend, as a business partner." Hoxton informed her.

"I heard that."

"How long until they can get to and back from the 'old castle in the middle of a forest' that is somewhat near here?" Chains inquired.

"If thou meanst the Everfree Castle, then two days, perhaps three." Luna answered with a happy smile.

"Hey Bain? When you see some small horses in gold armour that talk, pop a flare or something. Oh, and try not to kill any of them." Dallas added.

"Fine, but if they touch anything, don't expect them to be coming back. Pass that on to 'em."

"He says that if they touch anything they shouldn't, they're dead." Wolf said to Celestia.

She nodded hesitantly, making a note to tell the guards to avoid touching anything. "Anything else?"

"Nah, that should be good. Bye Bain!" Hoxton grabbed a small black box from within his jacket, his thumb hovering over the red button while the other three did the same.

"No wait!" What Bain was about to say wasn't heard as they all hit the buttons in sync, cutting off the connection.

"Well, now that's taken care of, what's next?" Dallas asked.

"We can talk in the morning. Until then," She knocked her hoof on the marble floor twice and a servant walked in, bowing.

"Yes your majesty?" She asked.

"Please take these four to some unoccupied guest rooms, and bring them anything they may require." Celestia said kindly.

The servant nodded. "Please follow me sirs."

The four of them looked between each other and shrugged, Hoxton wincing slightly as his painkillers started wearing off.

The entirety of Canterlot Castle was woken up by the sound of music.

"DAMN YOU WOLF!" Hoxton shouted as he groggily got out of bed.

The four of them had crashed after being shown to their rooms, only giving themselves time to take their armour and clothes off and setting their masks on their bedside tables. A habit they made after the few times when they needed their masks after getting woken up suddenly.

Apparently Wolf didn't need as much sleep as the rest of them. The three normal heisters got their suits on, leaving their armour, and put their masks on along with concealing a silenced pistol in their suits. Another habit that was not likely going to be broken.

Hoxton stepped out of his room first, followed by Chains slamming his door open and storming out. Dallas walked out as he usually did, seemingly unfazed by his interrupted slumber.

Six more doors down the hall opened, some more forcefully than others. "What they hay is goin' on around here?" An orange pony asked while positioning a stetson on her head.

"Why are you complaining AJ? This music is awesome!" A rainbow maned one said smiling. "I would wake up to this song every day!"

"Rainbow! How could you find this noise to be music?!" A white one with a purple mane asked, astonished.

"Trust me," Hoxton said absentmindedly. "This is him on a good morning, wait until you see his bad ones..."

The humans and ponies took notice of each other. The ponies recognizing them instantly, while the humans didn't care much.

"Oh, piss." Hoxton blurted. He looked at Dallas. "Who the fuck are they?"

"Who cares, Chains is going to shut Wolf up." Chains said as he banged on Wolf's door.

The Music stopped abruptly and the sound of Wolf's shoes against the tiled floor was heard coming towards the doors. They opened slowly and Wolf's masked face popped out of the doors. "Yeah?" He took a quick look down the hallway and could see the glaring faces and masks of five random ponies, the other one just looked disappointed, and crew. "What?"

"Turn the music down next time." Dallas said simply before wandering down the hallway past the ponies, seemingly having his destination in mind.

"Hey Dallas, where're you goin'?" Chains asked.

"Gonna see if I can find some food in this place, hungry anyone?"

"Starved!" Wolf exclaimed, coming out of his room, taking off his grease stained gloves.

"Chains could go for some grub." Chains said walking down the hallway, Wolf running ahead.

"Might as well." Hoxton finished, politely passing the ponies as he followed the others down the hall. When he was about to round the corner he looked back at the ponies who stood there with confused and angry expressions. "You comin' or what?"

After a few minutes of aimless wandering, the four heisters found a maid who led them to the dining hall, where they were going to be having breakfast shortly. An odd point to Wolf was that all of the staff in the castle looked slight shaken, most with slight dark circles under their eyes. As if they hadn't gotten enough sleep.

When they reached the hall in question, the doors were open to see the six ponies they ran into that morning, and the two chairs at the head of the table empty. The six ponies had taken up the six seats on one side of the table, nearest to the two empty chairs. They took the seats opposite.

When they noticed them, two of them sent glares, two with fear, and two with wonder. The purple one who was sitting closest to the large empty chairs across from Dallas cleared her throat. "I suppose introductions are in ord-"

The pink one seemingly phased through the table and ended up in Wolf's lap, her face right in his. He didn't flinch in the slightest. "Do you like cake?" She asked with a dead serious look, as if his answer would decide his fate.

"Depends, what kind?" Wolf answered, placing his hands behind his head, trying to ignore the fact that she was basically standing on his crotch.

"Any kind."

"Then yes. Now please get off my balls." He wheezed.

She looked down to where her hooves were with a brow raise. It took her a moment before she let out a knowing 'Oohhhhhh' before slowly removing herself and reappearing in her seat. Wolf set his forehead on the table as he suppressed a groan while shielding his privates from further harm with his hands.

"Nice." Hoxton remarked.

The purple one cleared her throat again, ignoring the slight blush to her cheeks. "Uh, yes well, as I was saying. I think introductions are in order. My name is-"

The doors burst open and a very unhappy Celestia walked in, dark circles under her eyes, followed by Luna who was in a similar step, but at least had a smile on her face. Celestia took her seat on the side with the ponies while Luna took the one closest to the four man army.

"Who thought it was a good idea to blast the infernal racket at three in the morning? I hadn't even raised the sun yet, and I was enjoying a nice conversation with my sister in her Dream Court." Celestia said through a scowl.

Every other face in the room turned to Wolf, his head still on the table.

Celestia sighed as she used her magic to freshen herself up. With a pop she looked as if she was a good as new, relatively speaking. "Wolf, please refrain from doing that in the future, so long as you are in my castle, I will be getting up no earlier than five in the morning."

"Although the music was compelling." Luna chimed in, using the same method to cleanse herself.

"Compelling?" The cyan and rainbow maned pegasus blurted. "It was AWESEOME!"

"Thank you!" The muffled voice of Wolf was heard as he gave a thumbs up to the mare.

Some servants entered the room, passing out menus to each of the occupants of the table. Wolf took his head from the table before looking at it.

"What the fuck..." Wolf mumbled as he looked through the choices. None of which containing the lifeblood of his diet. "Where's the meat?"

The ponies looked up at them with raised brows, and one with a dropped jaw. "Y-You eat other animals?" The butter yellow one asked.