Discord's Keychain Gang

by Metool Bard

Rating: everyone
Tags: Coco Pommel, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Cheese Sandwich, Comedy, Spitfire, Discord, Slice of Life, Seabreeze
Length: 5183

Discord travels around Equestria trying to make new friends. He discovers that it's harder than it looks.

After getting a taste of his own medicine from Lord Tirek, Discord has decided to take his reformation a bit more seriously. Sure, he has magic and friendship again, but it's clearly not enough to warrant his own throne in Twilight's fancy new castle. In order to earn the coveted throne, he figures that he has to be the best friend he can be.

While scrolling through the Friendship Journal for inspiration and pointers, an epiphany hits him. Since he was reformed, he has never made an honest attempt to make new friends by himself. As the first step on this new journey, he decides to rectify that. And who better to befriend than the other ponies that provided the keys to the chest? It's the perfect plan!

Too bad he doesn't really know what he's doing. Yeah, despite understanding empathy, Discord still has a lot to learn about friendship.

Published 2014-06-28 18:40:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-06-28 18:40:04 UTC

Key Connections

Discord's Keychain Gang

"Wait a minute, where's my throne?!"

"I, don't think you're quite there yet."

"Huhho. Yes, well, I suppose not."

Discord was lounging about in his Thinking Tree, a film projector connected to his ear. The projector was showing a particular exchange he had with Fluttershy the day before. As he watched the exchange over and over again, a contemplative frown crossed his face.

"She's right, of course," he mused, stroking his goatee. "After what I did, I'm clearly not there yet. If I was, I wouldn't have been so easily tricked by Tirek. Well, I'll make sure that doesn't happen again. Now that I know how valuable friendship is, I'm going to have to study its nuances more carefully. And once I'm a good friend, I'll have my own throne for sure!"

He disconnected the projector from his ear and squished it into a little ball. After playing around with the former projector in his hands for a bit, he molded it into a lightbulb and placed it just above his head.

"Now then, how do I go about doing this?" Discord said thoughtfully. "Perhaps I'll help those Cutie Mark Crusaders again. They seemed to appreciate it last time, even if I was just messing with them."

The lightbulb glowed red and made a buzzing sound.

"Mmm, right. They don't seem to be too interested in crusading nowadays, now do they?" said Discord, chuckling a bit. "Heh, kids grow up so fast. Hmm. How about I start sending friendship reports to Celestia?"

Another buzz came from the lightbulb.

"Oh, yeah. We're still like oil and water. Silly me," said Discord, his body slowly turning into a liquid. "Actually, I think we're more like oil and vinegar nowadays. We go together, but we don't mix. Is that my problem? Am I too much like vinegar? Fluttershy does say that I can attract more flies with honey than with vinegar. But how does honey fit into this equation?"

Three buzzing sounds came from the lightbulb as it flashed on and off.

"What do you mean I'm getting off-track? I thought it was a legitimate question," said Discord, regaining his solid form. "Eh, whatever. Hmm. Maybe I could give one of my friends another friendship test."

The lightbulb started buzzing like crazy and blinking rapidly.

"Okay, okay! Sheesh. I trick my friends into thinking I'm sick one time, and all of a sudden, I'm marked for life," Discord grumbled. "Ugh, this is useless. I can't figure this out on my own. I don't know enough about friendship. I'm going to need some help on this one."

He then snapped his fingers and summoned the Friendship Journal. The multi-colored bookmarks still highlighted the passages he had marked before to help Twilight and her friend figure out the riddle of the chest. He pulled a pair of reading glasses out of one of the branches of his Thinking Tree and began flipping through it.

"Let's see here," he mused. "No. No. No. Oh, goodness no. Wait, when did Fluttershy become part vampire? I might need to ask her about that later. Mmm, no. No. No. Wait, hello. What's this?"

He flipped open a passage of the journal and began reading it aloud.

"'Dear Journal: Today, we met Pinkie Pie's sister, Maud. She really wanted us to click and become part of her candy necklace tradition, but...' Hmm, blah blah blah, yaketey shmacktey... 'And so, we learned that the thing that made us click and formed our connection to Maud was our shared love for Pinkie Pie.' Huh, so it was a single thing that they all had in common that made them friends. That's actually quite swee—"

Just then, the lightbulb glowed green and made a dinging sound.

"Of course! Why didn't I think of that before?!" Discord exclaimed, his expression brightening. "Truth be told, I haven't really tried to make any new friends since my reformation. Maybe that's the first step to understanding friendship and earning my own throne in Twilight's new castle! And thanks to this little passage, I know just who to go to! It's brilliant!"

He began flipping through the journal again and rereading the passages he highlighted. "Twilight and her friends were connected by the Elements of Harmony, so who's to say that the keys don't play a similar role? I'm usually not a big fan of fate or destiny seeing as they're so predictable, but this could work! Alright, Discord! Time for you to make some new friends and get that throne!"

With that, he snapped his fingers and disappeared in a flash of light.

***

"La la la la la, la la la la la..."

Coco Pommel hummed gleefully to herself as she entered her rented studio in Manehattan. Her saddlebags were stuffed to the brim with fabrics, spools of thread, and concept images of elaborate dresses that she had just received from her boss.

"Okay, just one more ensemble, and all of the costumes will be complete just in time for my boss's newest Bridleway sensation," she said, setting up her sewing machine. "This'll be my greatest creation yet! Oh, if only Rarity could see me now."

She put on a pair of designer glasses and took out one of the concept images. As she studied it carefully, the sewing machine quietly activated itself. Unbeknownst to her, a single thread snaked its way out of the machine. As the thread got longer, it became larger as well. Very soon, limbs and a head popped out of it. When Coco looked up, she saw that Discord was sticking out of her sewing machine.

"Gah!" she shrieked, nearly falling out of her chair.

"Sorry to drop in unannounced," said Discord, trying to pull his snake tail out of the sewing machine. "I just *mmph* heard so many wonderful things about you *errgh* from Rarity, and *oof* I thought it would be nice if we *ugh* met face-to-face."

Coco tried to speak, but all that came out was incomprehensible gibberish.

"Um, are you alright, my dear?" asked Discord, floating over to her. "I assure you, I mean you no harm. I just wanted to have a nice chat with you. Y'know, get to know you better."

Coco's face turned bright red. "I, um..."

"Wha—? No, no! Not like that!" said Discord, waving his arms frantically. "That kind of thing is way out of my league! I'm only beginning to understand the basics of friendship, for crying out loud!"

"O-oh," said Coco, taking a moment to collect herself. "W-well, that's very nice of you, Mr. Discord. However, I'm kind of busy right now."

"Busy?" said Discord, stroking his chin. "Well, maybe I can help. After all, that's what friends do, isn't it?"

"Well, yes," said Coco. "But I really want to do this myself. If I finish this costume, then I'll be one step closer to being recognized for my craft in the fashion community."

"Ah, so you are an artiste, hmm?" said Discord, suddenly donning a beret, a striped shirt, and a handlebar mustache. "I have a great appreciation for the arts myself. What're you making?"

"This design my boss wants me to have done by noon today," said Coco, showing Discord the concept image.

Discord took the image in his hands and summoned Rarity's designer glasses. He proceeded to flip the image around a few times, looking at it from every angle before sticking his tongue out in disgust.

"Blech~. He really expects you to make this?" said he. "Rarity wouldn't be caught dead showcasing this ugly atrocity. Surely, you could do better."

Coco twiddled her hooves. "But if I don't do what my boss tells me, I'll get in trouble."

"Take it from me, Coco Pommel. If you go through your whole life trying to make others happy, you'll never make yourself happy," said Discord sagely. "Of course, making others happy is still important. So what you should do is make this better. That way, your boss will love it, even though you didn't do exactly what he told you to!"

Coco opened her mouth to protest, but then tapped her muzzle in thought as Discord's words sank in.

"Well, I think it could use a few more improvements..." she mused.

"That's the spirit!" cheered Discord. "Now then, help me out of this thing so that we can get started, eh?"

Coco gave Discord a confused look before seeing that he was still stuck in the sewing machine.

"Oh, right," she giggled sheepishly. "Here, let me get that for you."

She then unjammed the sewing machine, and the last of the thread disappeared into the tuft of fur on the end of Discord's snake tail.

"Thanks, friend," said Discord. "So, what should we do first?"

Coco looked at the concept drawing and frowned. "Well, for starters, it needs more feathers."

"Done!" said Discord with a snap of his fingers. An entire flock of birds flew through the studio apartment, leaving a ton of feathers of all colors on the spectrum behind.

"O-oh. Thank you," said Coco. "Um, I think it could also do with some sequins."

"Coming right up!"

With another snap of his fingers, the studio floor was flooded with sequins. The glare from the beads forced Coco the shield her eyes.

"Um, maybe that's too many sequins," she murmured.

"Oh, sorry," said Discord. He then pulled a plug out of the floor, and the sequins swirled down a drain that spontaneously appeared.

"Th-that should be enough," said Coco.

Discord nodded and replaced the stopper on the drain, leaving quite a few sequins behind.

"Right, now let's get started," said Coco with a nod.

She then got right to work, sketching over the concept image and sewing up the new costume. As she worked, Discord laid down on her couch and stretched himself out.

"Say, Coco. Mind if I call you Coco?" said Discord. "I was wondering, maybe after this, we can go out and get some coffee or something."

"Mmm? Oh, that sounds lovely," said Coco, still focused on her work. "But, I actually have a lot to do today. Maybe some other time."

"Oh. Okay," said Discord with a shrug. "I suppose it's just as well. I have a pretty full day myself."

Coco gave Discord a confused look. "Then, why did you ask me if I had any plans?"

"No reason," said Discord, shrugging again. "I'd best be off. Break a leg, Coco!"

With that, he snapped his fingers and disappeared. As soon as he did so, the chair Coco was sitting on broke one of its legs, and she fell to the floor with a plop. Just when she got up and dusted herself off, there was a knock at the door.

"Coco, are you finished with my costume?" came a stern voice from the other side.

"J-just a moment!" stammered Coco, putting the finishing touches on the costume. She then trotted over to the door and opened it. "Ta-da!"

Her boss looked over the costume and raised an eyebrow. "Coco, this isn't what I asked for."

"O-oh, I know that," said Coco, brushing the back of her head. "I-I just thought I'd make a few improvements to it. Do you like it?"

Her boss stroked his chin in thought. "Well, it's not better, but it isn't worse, either. It's just, different. Hmm."

Coco's heart pounded as her boss hemmed and hawed for a while. Finally, he shrugged.

"Meh, I think I can still use this," he said, taking the costume from Coco. "Thanks, Coco."

Coco beamed and bowed. "Oh, thank you for this amazing opportunity, sir," she said. And thank you for the help, Discord, she added mentally. I think.

***

"Hi-ya! Hoo-ah!"

In the sky above the Wonderbolt Academy, Spitfire was hard at work busting clouds with her fellow Wonderbolts. As they worked, she noticed that some of her teammates were showing off, doing fancy tricks as they plowed through the clouds. Deciding to join in the fun, Spitfire did a loop and propelled herself into a nosedive towards a low-hanging cloud. Just then, a speeding object zoomed by her, causing her to spin out. When she regained her senses, she saw that the object was none other than Discord, dressed up as a Wonderbolt Cadet.

"Wonderbolt Cadet Discord, reporting for duty, ma'am!" he announced, giving Spitfire a salute.

Spitfire lowered her flight goggles. "Discord? You're not a member of the Academy. Heck, just a couple of days ago, you and Tirek wiped out my entire platoon when we tried to stop you!"

"Oh, pish posh. That's all in the past, ma'am," said Discord with a dismissive wave of his paw. "I was just in the neighborhood, and I wondered if you ponies needed any help with anything."

Spitfire arched an eyebrow. "So, you're trying to make amends?"

"I'm actually trying to make friends, but you're close."

Spitfire knitted her brow. "Hmm. Well, Private Rainbow Dash did say you were sorry in her report on the incident, so I suppose she can vouch for you."

"Ah, Rainbow Dash. She's a true friend, isn't she?" said Discord whimsically. "Always so loyal. Except when I'm faking being sick, of course."

"What?"

"Nothing!" said Discord, casting his gaze upward. "So, need any help?"

"No, we're good," said Spitfire. "We're just going through some cloud busting drills right now, and..."

"Oh, cloud busting, huh?" interrupted Discord. "Here, let me get that for you."

With a snap of his fingers, all of the clouds vanished into puffs of vapor. Spitfire stared blankly at the spectacle before narrowing her eyes.

"No need to thank me, ma'am," said Discord with a salute. "Just doing my duty."

Spitfire folded her forelegs. "Mmm-hmm. Discord, can I ask you something?"

"You just did, but go ahead."

"How are we supposed to train if you do all the work for us?"

Discord did a double take. "Wait, you were training?! I didn't think Wonderbolts needed training."

"What? Of course we do," said Spitfire. "Being the best flyers in Equestria is no excuse to get complacent. We need to be in tip-top shape should we ever have to defend our home."

"Oh. OH!" said Discord, finally getting the picture. "I am terribly sorry, ma'am. Here, I can fix it."

"No, Discord. You don't have to—"

Before Spitfire could finish her thought, Discord snapped his fingers again. The clouds reappeared, but this time, they were pink and smelled quite sweet.

"Ooh, these look nice!" said Surprise, taking a bite out of one. "Mmm~! Hey, Cap! These clouds taste great! It's just like cotton candy!"

Spitfire raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

"Eh heh, sorry. Old habits die hard," said Discord sheepishly, clearing his throat. "Here, I'll try again."

He snapped his fingers again, and the cotton candy clouds were replaced by spiky Everfree clouds.

"There? How's that?" said Discord. "I bet you never had training this intense before."

Spitfire deadpanned. "Discord, let me tell you something about the Wonderbolts. We have a lot of maneuvers in our repertoire, but one type of maneuver we don't practice is kamikaze! If we try to bust those clouds, we could get ourselves killed!"

Discord scratched his head. "But, aren't you Wonderbolts? Shouldn't you be thrilled by a challenge like this?"

"There's a difference between pushing yourself and being reckless, Discord," said Spitfire, tapping her foot in midair. "These Everfree clouds are the latter. Now, look. I'll just contact the Weather Factory and have them send in more clouds. You don't have to..."

"No no no! This was my mistake, and I have to fix it," said Discord, cutting across Spitfire. "Here."

He snapped his fingers again.

"That's just a flying sheep," said Spitfire, maintaining her bemused glare.

*snap*

"That's a crude drawing of a cloud that's somehow three-dimensional."

*snap*

"Those are the cotton candy clouds again."

*snap*

"I don't know what that is, but it's definitely not a cloud."

Finally, with one final snap, the sky was filled with normal clouds again. Discord wiped a bit of sweat from his brow.

"Phew. Sorry about that, ma'am," he said. "This actually happens a lot more often than you think. Chaos magic sometimes has a mind of its own, you see. Say, how about I make it up to you? We'll do lunch. My treat."

"You forget that I'm a Wonderbolt," said Spitfire. "My schedule is pretty full."

"C'mon, please? I really want to make it up to you," said Discord, his eyes turning into those of a puppy dog.

Spitfire rolled her eyes and sighed. "Look, I'll check with my secretary and get back to you. Now will you please leave us alone?"

"Done!" said Discord. "Seeya later!"

With one final salute, he sped off over the horizon.

"What was that all about, Spit?" asked Soarin'.

Spitfire let out another sigh. "Honestly, I have no idea."

***

"Ugh, c'mon, you! We gotta *oof* make it to this *argh* party!"

Cheese Sandwich was sweating like crazy as he shoved a giant party bomb up a flight of stairs. He was about halfway there when he stopped to take a rest.

"Phew! This kid's gonna be in for one heck of a party, eh Boneless 2?" he said.

"He sure will be."

Cheese did a double take. "Boneless 2? Why do you sound like Discord?"

In response, the rubber chicken's beak opened up, and Discord crawled out of it.

"Howdy, Cheese Sandwich!" he said with a wave.

"Oh, that's why," said Cheese with a chuckle. "Howdy, Discord. I haven't seen you since our Goof-Off in Mustangia. What's up?"

"Just figured I'd drop by and see what you're doing," said Discord with a shrug. He then noticed the massive party bomb. "Ooh, that looks impressive."

"Yep!" Cheese grunted. "My Cheesy Sense was going off like you wouldn't believe. I knew I had to give this foal the best party of his life!"

"I see," said Discord, twirling his goatee around his finger. "Um, do you need help with that?"

Cheese snickered and rolled his eyes. "Noooo, I want you to cut off all of my legs with a chainsaw."

Discord stared blankly at Cheese for a moment before shrugging. "Well, I don't know how that'll help, but if you insist."

He then summoned a chainsaw and revved it up. Cheese blanched.

"H-hey hey hey! I didn't mean it, Discord!" he shouted. "I was just being sarcastic!"

The chainsaw drooped over and floated away, looking rather ashamed. Discord folded his mismatched arms and sulked.

"Well, that's just great. How was I supposed to know that?" he said indignantly. "I'm not a mind reader, for crying out loud. Although..."

He then reached into Cheese's ear and pulled out a length of ticker tape, which he began to read.

"Uh-huh, uh-huh... Oh. Turns out you were being sarcastic," said Discord, blushing as he released the ticker tape. "Heh, my bad."

The ticker tape snapped back into Cheese's head, causing his eyes to spin around for a bit.

"So, you really do need help," said Discord.

"Uh, yeah," said Cheese, recovering the from odd experience.

"No problem, I got this."

Discord snapped his fingers, and the whole building rotated a full ninety degrees. The party bomb rolled down the railing and crashed through the door at the top of the stairs (which was now the bottom). Cheese gave Discord a look.

"Couldn't you have just, I don't know, teleported it up the stairs?" he asked.

"Nope. It would've made too much sense," said Discord, turning the building right side up again. "That's not exactly how I roll."

Cheese sighed. "At least tell me nopony was seriously hurt."

Discord snapped his fingers. "They aren't now."

Cheese looked into the crashed room and saw that all of the ponies, while dazed and confused, were still unharmed.

"Huh. I see," he said. "Uh, thanks. I think."

"Just doing my part as a good friend," said Discord with a bow. "Say, you wanna do lunch after this?"

"Sorry, but Boneless 2 and I have to hit the trail right after this," said Cheese sheepishly. "You know how it is."

"Ah," said Discord. "Perhaps another time then. Ciao!"

With that, he disappeared. Cheese snickered and shook his head.

"He sure is a crazy character, huh Boneless 2?" he said before entering the apartment. "Alright, ponies! Who's ready to party?!"

***

"Melo feraragen! Fola mietan markiplip!"

Seabreeze waved goodbye to his wife as he flew out into the grotto. Taking in a deep breath, he made his way over to his neighbor's house.

"Hoy~!"

He heard an unfamiliar voice call out to him. Curious, he turned around to see an odd-looking breezie that he had never met before. This breezie had a deer antler and a goat's horn instead of antennae, and his limbs were that of different animals.

"Seabreeze, I presume?" said the odd breezie in fluent English.

"Aye," said Seabreeze, raising an eyebrow. "I thought I was the only one who knew that language around here. Who're you?"

"Oh, forgive my manners," said the odd breezie. "Here, my card."

The breezie reached into his body and pulled out a tiny business card. Seabreeze took it and read it over.

"'Discord: Master of Chaos, Provider of the Key of Magic, Co-Founder of the Fourth Wall Theater Troupe...'" He then squinted at the card in confusion. "'Does not do windows?' What?"

"Oopsie!" said Discord hastily, snatching the card back and hiding it away. "That was a misprint. It meant to say 'Friend of Fluttershy.' I really need to speak to my printer about that."

"Um, okay," said Seabreeze, rubbing the side of his head. "Well, any friend of Fluttershy is a friend o'mine. But still, what're ya doin' here?"

"Well, since we're both friends of Fluttershy, I thought I'd just stop by and set a spell," said Discord.

Seabreeze arched an eyebrow. "I thought the portal to your world was closed. How'd you get here?"

"See where it says 'Master of Chaos?'" said Discord, taking out his card again. "I can do whatever I want whenever I want."

"Fascinatin'," said Seabreeze, folding his forelegs. "Well, if y'don't mind, I actually have to go over to my neighbor Twirly and pick up a cup of nectar. My wife's makin' her special nectar bread tonight, and we're a bit short."

"Oh, allow me, friend," said Discord with a bow. "It would be my pleasure to help you."

Seabreeze tilted his head. "Um, okay. Y'sure? 'Cause, y'don't seem to speak our language."

"Hey, who's the Master of Chaos here?" asked Discord with a sly grin. "Just watch this."

He then knocked on the door of the mushroom house Twirly resided in. Twirly poked her head out and blinked at Discord's odd appearance.

"Seko? Meli mottzo?" she asked.

Discord cleared his throat. "Um, yes. *ahem* Supa laipas data kurpa. Mise neku ersken laika maur. Siripat sulat?"

Twirly's eyes became as wide as dinner plates. "Dopa meniki! Ara mero knipipit! Konso!"

She then slammed the door in Discord's face. Discord blinked in confusion.

"What? All I did was ask her for a cup of nectar," he said.

"Uh, actually, you didn't," said Seabreeze, massaging the bridge of his nose. "That's not what those words mean."

"Then, what do they mean?"

"Y'don't wanna know."

Discord took a moment to ponder this. When he connected the dots, he blushed.

"Oh. How embarrassing," he said, taking out a tape recorder and turning it on. "Note to self: Ask Fluttershy for breezie language lessons.'"

"That's probably for the best, boy-o," said Seabreeze. "I'd teach ya myself, but I've got stuff to do. Y'know, can't keep the missus waitin'."

"I understand," said Discord. "Say, is there any way I can make it up to you?"

"Eh, don't worry 'bout it none," said Seabreeze dismissively. "I can always get nectar from another neighbor."

"Well, maybe I can..."

"No, that's fine," interrupted Seabreeze. "I can get it myself. I think you've helped quite enough today."

"Ah, okay. I see," said Discord with a nod. "I, think I might want to brush up on my breezie before coming back here. Maybe we can do lunch or something. Well, until next time, Seabreeze! Arrivederci!"

With that, Discord disappeared in a flash of light. Seabreeze blinked.

"Huh. What a peculiar fellow," he mused before proceeding with his day. "How did a sweet lass like Fluttershy befriend a nutter like that, I wonder?"

***

"Disguises! Get your disguises over here!"

Silver Shill was having a slow day at Rainbow Falls. He still had yet to sell all of the disguises that he had used when he worked for the FlimFlam Brothers, but nopony seemed interesting in buying them. As he let out a disappointed sigh, the Discord lamp sitting on his table blinked and looked up at him.

"Ah, you must be Silver Shill," said the lamp. "Trying to make an honest living, I see."

Silver Shill did a double take. "Wh-what?! Wh-what's happening?!"

"Relax, relax. It's just me," said the lamp. With a click, the lamp transformed into the actual Discord. "I just wanted to say hi."

"Huh? W-well, hello yourself," said Silver Shill, shivering a bit. "W-would you be interested in buying a disguise? I've got plenty."

"Thanks, but I have my own," said Discord, taking the shape of Silver Shill himself. "See?"

"Gah!" Silver Shill gasped, nearly falling over. "D-don't do that!"

"Sorry, sorry," said Discord, changing back to normal. "So, having much luck?"

"Not really," Silver Shill sighed. "Nopony seems to be interested in what I'm selling."

"Hmm. Quite a predicament," mused Discord. "Well, let me fix that. I'll make sure your wares are selling like hot cakes!"

"Um, you're not going to do anything, dishonest, are you?" inquired Silver Shill, twiddling his hooves. "I mean, I'm trying to break away from the practices of my previous employers, after all."

"Ah, right. The lesson you learned from Applejack. Sticking to her guns like that must not be easy for her," said Discord. "Don't worry, I won't tell a single lie. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

Discord reenacted the Pinkie Promise, complete with smashing a cupcake into his eyeball. He blinked a few times and smiled.

"Mmm. Apple cinnamon. Quite appropriate, actually," he said. "Alright, just leave it to me."

He then donned a plaid jacket and summoned a cane.

"Step right up, ponies!" he hollered. "You, too, can change the way you look with these wonderful wigs and glasses! Fool your foes! Entertain your friends! Get your Nightmare Night shopping done early! You'll become a whole new pony when you don these outfits!"

"Uh, what're you doing?" Silver Shill hissed. "I thought you said you weren't going to lie!"

"I'm not lying; I'm exaggerating," Discord whispered back. "There's a difference. And if you want to be a successful salespony, you're gonna have to learn that difference. Nopony's gonna buy something if they don't think they're getting their money's worth."

Silver Shill rubbed the side of his head. "Well, I guess that's true, but it still feels wrong."

"Life is full of necessary evils, Silver Shill," said Discord with a shrug. "I should know; I'm one of them. After all, life would be boring if everything was orderly."

"I suppose," Silver Shill mused. "Still, I don't think..."

"Did he say those disguises could entertain friends?"

"Hey, I have some foes that I want to fool!"

Much to Silver Shill's surprise, a whole mob of ponies crowed around his booth, waving their purses and wallets in the air.

"Okay, okay! One at a time! No pushing!" hollered Silver Shill, trying to maintain order. He looked up at Discord, who was giving him a sly smirk.

"You were saying?" he asked.

Silver Shill smiled back. "Eh, never mind," he said. "I'll have to think about this. Thanks."

"Just being a good friend," said Discord with a wink. "Hey, wanna get lunch after this?"

"Oh, I can't," said Silver Shill, shaking his head. "I'm meeting with a new supplier today. Maybe some other time."

"Well, I could help you out with your image, if you want..."

"No, no! That's, that's fine," said Silver Shill hastily "I-I'll be okay, Mr. Discord. Thanks for offering though."

Discord shrugged. "Well, if you say so. I'm on for tea with Fluttershy, anyway."

Silver Shill tilted his head. "Then, why did you ask if I had plans?"

"Y'know, Coco Pommel asked me the same question today," said Discord. "Are you two related?"

"Um, no. I've never even heard of her."

"Well, you two should meet sometime. I think you'd get along great. She lives in Manehattan, in case you're interested. Well, 'til next time!"

With that, Discord opened a door in reality and walked through it. As he did, the door disappeared. Silver Shill blinked.

"Well, that happened," he said.

***

"So, how was your day, Discord?" asked Fluttershy.

"Alright, I suppose," said Discord, drinking his cucumber sandwiches and eating his tea. "I've been thinking about what you said about me not earning a throne in Twilight's castle, so I decided to make some new friends."

Fluttershy beamed. "All by yourself? Oh, that's wonderful! How did it go?"

"I'm, not entirely sure," said Discord, rubbing the back of his head. "I mean, I don't think I burned any bridges or anything, but between you and me, this friendship stuff is still hard work. I always felt like I was doing something wrong, even though I wasn't trying to."

"Well, at least your heart is in the right place," said Fluttershy, taking a sip of her tea. "That's all anypony can ask for. And I'm sure you'll get the hang of it the more you learn."

"I guess you're right," Discord said, taking a big bite out of his teacup. "Say, on a tangental note, do you think you could teach me the breezie language?"

Fluttershy tilted her head. "You want to learn the language of the breezies? Why?"

"Because apparently, 'Supa laipas data kurpa. Mise neku ersken laika maur. Siripat sulat?' doesn't mean 'Hello, how are you? May I borrow a cup of nectar?'"

Fluttershy's face turned beet red, and her wings stood up on end. "Um, no. No, it does not mean that. It doesn't. Mean it."

"Yeah, well. I found that out the hard way," Discord chuckled, downing the rest of his cucumber sandwich. "Like I said, this friendship stuff is harder than it looks."

Author's Note

I wasn't sure how long each of these scenes were going to be, so I just stuck them all into this one-shot. That being said, I wanted to show that while Discord did learn a lot about friendship in Twilight's Kingdom, there's still a lot that he doesn't know, meaning more potential for his character in later seasons. Also, some of these scenes were very fun to write. :twilightsmile:

On a side note, when Discord talked about helping the CMC, he was referring to a story in the comics. I'm just throwing that out there in case some of you are confused.