Twisted Paths

Secret Private Diary entry number 15

Designation: Dusk

Real name: Twilight Sparkle

Role: Right hand mare and apprentice of Queen Celestia, along with “Blaze", her partner

Partner’s real name: Sunset Shimmer

It’s been two weeks since my letter was sent out with no response from my mother. I am quite worried about her. Ever since my father was accused of treason, her name was never really cleared. It is mere chance that I have not been suspected on the same charge; only because I was never in contact with my father. My mother, being a former war magician, managed to serve her queen well; but not without certain obstacles.

Personally I have never considered why my father turned against the Queen, but it has never been important. And quite frankly he deserved it. Attacking the queen with a troop of armed personnel is nothing but treason. Of course I have never seen him commit this act, but that is what she tells me anyway. I have begun to question the Queen’s reasons for ordering the destruction of the travelers that came to the castle. I completely trust her judgment; however, I believe she might have made a mistake. Perhaps they really did want to trade. It doesn’t matter in the long run anyways.

Perhaps my letter's failure to arrive is due to unforeseen complications with the mail. It is not uncommon for the mail carriers to be attacked whenever they operate outside the castle; though I am not certain why. The lower equines, or earth ponies as they used to be called, don’t normally attack without reason. It would appear that they are not as under-evolved as we think. But still how could one resistance comprised almost entirely of magic-less creatures cause enough fear to put the castle defense on high alert, and cause so many casualties?

Common propaganda claims that they are nothing more than unorganized scum. And the horror sprouts that have buried their way deep into the fears of young unicorns everywhere are unimportant, rare, and without power. Somehow I begin to wonder if these are the tip of the iceberg of placebos and over-exaggerations that make up the “news”.

Yesterday a hole was punched into the force field that protects our castle . I was hard at work with Blaze to mend it. What surprised me most was not the cause. This is unusual because only highly developed magic-based creatures with a threat level of 3 or above can damage the field. But what really surprised me was the Queen’s reaction. She was not infuriated at whoever had, “dared to attack her rightful rule” as she normally was. Instead her expression was of complete and unmistakable fear. I know this look well. I often see it when torture is involved in one of her “lessons”.

This was fear of something else. I will need to investigate carefully. The last time Blaze tried to snoop around the castle, she returned with severe lacerations on her back and third degree burns on her right side. The queen will often use irony with her discipline tactics. Whether or not she knows my or Blaze’s real name is still a mystery to me. It is considered unlawful to share one's real name unless in marriage or with family.

I know two things for certain: the queen is not telling us something, and that ‘something’ is about to happen.

-End of final entry-    June 17

Twisted Paths

Chapter One: Revelation

At first the situation was a lot to take in. The recent events swirled in Dusk’s head round and round until she felt nauseous. How did she not see this coming? It was so obvious. How could she have been so blind? Her trek was taking her upward to the swamp moors. She had heard about a safe haven for renegade unicorns there. Whether or not this was indeed true was of little importance. It was getting later in the afternoon and she had nowhere else to go. Besides, she needed something to do.

Soon she began to tire of her journey. It seemed as if the very sun itself was working with the expressed purpose of burning her alive, and her legs were beginning to feel like lead. Finally taking a break, Dusk paused to gaze blankly at a stream that was peacefully gliding by her.

Her thoughts overwhelmed her with a tinge of remorse and regret. Why was I not fast enough? How did I fail so badly and how could I be abandoned this way? Am I worth nothing? Was I always worth nothing? The questions seemed endless. And so did the emotions behind those questions. Emotions that she had refused to feel for anyone else outside of her little circle of trust; not even her own father. Now that “little circle” was broken, forever.

Soon she began to imagine the stream was gliding. Flying past the rocks and flying past the trees and the sand. And flying past her. Just like the one thing she has suspected for so long but refused to think about it. Dusk cursed herself silently for being such a fool. In that moment one question she had alluded for so long came back to her. What if what I’m doing… NO! She refused to feel it! One last rush of pride and anger took hold of her.

“I am a Unicorn! And I will not be brought to question my actions like a petty Equine!” The affirmation left her mouth without so much as a thought as to what she was going to say. She screamed at… nothing in particular. Except maybe the stream. She decided to take her anger out on the water itself. She began to cast an incineration spell. Just like she had so many other times on those who had stood in the Queen’s way. She let the spell take hold of her mind in the way she was taught. With complete hatred for what she was about to destroy.

She estimated the blast radius of 3 feet wide in a circular shape and the micro explosion that would follow in seconds; something less advanced unicorns could only dream of doing. She then released the energy in her mind and within less than a second the spell was complete.

Dusk closed her eyes and waited for the coming destruction with a wide smirk on her lips. But that explosion never came. The confident smile now gone, Dusk opened her eyes. To her horror there was no destruction, no purple shade indicating her spell at work, and the stream was still there. Still peaceful as ever.

Panicking, Dusk tried the spell again, to no avail. Again and again she tried to destroy the symbol of her torment, her head waving wildly at each failed attempt as if that alone would help her achieve her goal. Driving her to obsession, she began to slam her front hooves down on the stream in wild pounces. She threw rocks in and dug up the elusive sand at the bottom of the stream in a futile attempt to stop the happiness of the stream that denied her the satisfaction she so desperately wanted.

A frog hopped onto a rock a few meters away and croaked at her with annoyance at her disturbing of his afternoon nap. Fixing her now furious gaze at him she tried to kill it with another spell, a simpler one but one that would work against this frog. Again, no effect. Screaming at the top of her lungs she lunged towards the little frog with all her might; horn first with the intention of impaling the little snob. With the smallest effort necessary the frog jumped from its perch to another nearby rock, and croaked again in the same manner as last time.

Now breaking into a full rage Dusk began chasing the little prick all over the still graceful pond, slamming her horn into whatever surface he had previously been on. If only one could have spotted this event from above, what a sight it would be! Finally exhausted from her anger, Dusk plopped into the middle of the stream not caring that her bright purple coat and her mane and tail were now drenched, not to mention her crimson royal cloak.

The cheerful frog stared into her eyes for a moment as if it was trying very hard to understand this strange Unicorn that had acted so erratically. After a few minutes of this he got bored and proceeded to hop contentedly on Dusk’s face, much to her annoyance.

“Get off me your cur!” She screamed at him. But she forgot that half of her face was under water so what she ended up saying was “GERB OFB OB MELB YOUGH CURB”. Croaking one last time the little creature jumped off of her face, not onto another rock but into the underbrush. Making several more croaks as it did as if it were laughing at her; and didn’t think much of her. Dusk decided reluctantly to let him go.

Questions and water still washing over her in a never ending maelstrom of hate. That same question rose up again, stronger this time. It grew in her mind louder and louder until she said it. Not in her mind but out loud.

“What if what I am doing… and everything I stand for is, wrong?” This time raising her head so her speech was not hindered. This one thought circled around her head now solitary where there once was many others. Becoming even louder than before it screamed at her until it became painful.

“What…? What is…happening?” the words now quiet and strained in her throat. The pain intensified and Dusk groaned under the pressure. Something was arising that had not been there before. Perhaps… a conscience? Suddenly the pain peaked and more hurt was thrust into her mind that she thought possible.

She tried to get up but her muzzle only fell back into the stream making it impossible to breath. She couldn’t move, and any attempt to do so only caused more and more pain. Never before had Dusk felt so much pain as she did at that moment. Suddenly her eyes flew open and a bright light protruded not from her horn, but from her eyes themselves. It was too bright to look at, but she had no choice. Total control of her body was now given over to this… thing, whatever it was. Suddenly she felt a huge release of energy, and something happened that she had never seen happen before. She saw her past. Splayed out in front of her as if on a large table.

Images and memories she thought long gone rose up from her subconscious as if they were kept at bay all this time. Until now being brought forth with such a brilliant display of colors that it caused her to blink in amazement. She saw her father, kind and gentle, not the monster she was trained to hate. And even more disturbing was the emotions she felt towards him. She loved him. More deeply than anything else that she had felt before, not even the pain that assaulted her or the inability to breath seemed to amount to this love. Slowly, all this washed away as another memory came forth.

One which she never wanted to remember. It was the Queens face. Not powerful and graceful as she had so often seen her, but cruel. Cruel and deadly. Much was the hate that she saw on that face. She remembered that face now. It was just after she had questioned the destruction of the travelers that came to the castle gates. Suddenly she remembered not only the face and the hate, but the hot irons on her side, and the steel plated whip that was assailing her back harder than she ever thought possible. She was feeling it all over again. Scratch by scratch, burn by burn, and blood for blood.

Suddenly, almost too quickly to realize what happened the memory faded away. But she did realize what happened. Now she was reliving what had just brought her to this pathetic existence. It was a normal day at the castle, and she was reading along with her partner Blaze. They were both dressed in their traditional crimson robes signifying their allegiance to their queen. They were discussing something but she couldn’t tell what. That in itself was not important.

But in an instant everything changed. Multiple explosions echoed around the halls and next thing she knew, she was running as had as she could to the one place she felt secure, to the Queen. Upon reaching her Dusk and Blaze both greeted her in unison with the traditional royal bow. But The Queen was not focused on them.

“Something has breached the perimeter, we must move to defend…” but before Celestia could finish her sentence a large explosion bloomed just overhead and a large hole appeared in the protective barrier that was constantly protecting the castle. Remembering an experiment, Dusk rand towards a secret chamber to retrieve a weapon she had just retrofitted form a design of the lower “equines”. She was going to show the Queen when the timing was more ideal but now she just needed to keep it away from the “Earth Ponies”. But The Queen was shouting at her for her to draw near. She was trying to initiate a teleport spell to move the entire castle but she needed both Blaze and Dusk to do it.

Blaze was already there but she remained in her position trying to retrieve the weapon, oblivious to the Queen. Thinking quickly, the queen drained all of Dusk’s magical power and put it in Blaze so she could initiate the teleport. Knocked unconscious from the spell, Dusk was barely successful in securing the weapon before she fell powerless to the ground. As her eyes closed she caught a glimpse of the castle disappearing just before an explosion hit next to where she lay causing her to fly back into some bushes. The sound of Hooves coming, and then nothing.

Dusk was still disoriented but at least what happened made sense now. It restored some of her clarity and allowed her to focus. The memory was changing again. She was now standing in her kitchen at home doing something. She couldn’t tell what yet. She could see the drawers and the stove and the fruit laid decoratively on the table just as clearly as ever. As if she was in the room at that moment. But then she was in that room. Along with her mother, and… herself. This memory was clearer than the last and she could move around as she pleased as if she was really there. Then she realized what the other Dusk was doing. She was yelling, arguing, screaming at her mother.

”You selfish, arrogant, fiend!” The other Dusk was screaming “You have jeopardized my entire LIFE!” Now Dusk was very confused. She did not remember this, nor did she want to. She had never had an argument with her own mother before. Not to mention one of this severity. Perhaps this was the reason her mother was not responding to her? Was she too angry at her for something she couldn’t even remember?

“You have betrayed me, your kingdom and your Queen! You don’t deserve to live any more than that RAT of my father did!” Now that was too much, her words were too harsh for even herself to hear. She began to brace herself for the barrage that was sure to come from her mother. But instead she was sitting down, with a horrified expression on her face, and… that look! That look of complete and utter selflessness that she just saw on her father’s face. Suddenly Dusk began to get angry again. Almost as angry as her past self. She was angry for never feeling this love that she only now remembered.

“What has that witch Celestia done to you?” her mother sobbed through her tears. “You used to be such a kind unicorn! Everyone said so! What has changed you so much that you would become blind to the Queen's betrayal?” When her mother said this Dusk realized she must have turned from the queen. She was suddenly filled with hate for her mother. How could she have done such a thing?

“The only betrayal here, mother, is your own!” Future and past Dusk screamed together almost in unison. But then she realized something. Something was departing from her. And with it her desire to be useful and loyal to the Queen. And as it left her affection for this older unicorn grew, and she no longer wished for her to share her father’s fate. She could no longer move. She was now inside her own body. Witnessing these her hateful words form the very eyes of her past self.

“I will see you killed!” She was now saying.

“Twilight… Please…. No. This is not how you were supposed to be. You were supposed to restore peace to the kingdom! To this household! To Equestria…”

“SILENCE!! You no longer will call me by that name! You will no longer hold any value to me you…” The language that followed was intense and heartbreaking. And with each word, it seemed that an invisible sword pierced Dusk’s already torn and mangled heart. Then she began to walk forward. Towards the weeping mother whom she had only just come to know.

“NO!” She screamed. But no one heard her. “Please! NO!!” She yelled at herself from within.

“I was going to report you and see you hanged, but I think I like this better.”

Suddenly the light drained from the room. And the realization of what she was about to do hit her like a falling boulder.

“NOOOOO!!!” Tears welled in her eyes, and emotions she never thought possible assailed her from every direction. She recognized the glow. It was a torture/devastation spell often used for extreme cases where pure fear was needed. It was designed to be stopped mid-way because the completion of the spell would result in utter annihilation of anything that got in the way. Nopony had ever been faced with getting hit by this spell fully completed, and no unicorn had ever completed it before. But Dusk felt within her that she could. In fact, she had been working at it for the last few months in an effort to please the Queen.

“The process of this spell is extremely painful.” She said menacingly with an evil smile. “Designed to mimic the process of one’s soul being torn from one’s body. Just like what happens when somepony touches a death note. Not only does it drain the soul, it keeps the subject alive for several minutes without their soul.

But you know this, you came up with the idea didn’t you?” Her mother’s expression turned from sorrow to absolute terror. Past Dusk relished this terrified expression. It was true her mother’s job was to come up with spells to fight the common threat and, if necessary, to extract information. This particular spell was one of her recent failures.

“After tearing it from the subject’s body, the spell then fires the soul back into them. Resulting in a devastating explosion from within. Very effective, wouldn’t you say, mother?” She asked with an even bigger smile than before. She then broke into a great laughter. One that shook the building and made the floor rumble.

Dusk was now too overwhelmed to breathe. Being forced to witness this through her own eyes along with the knowledge that she had done this with great satisfaction was causing her to lose it. All she could do was watch and pray that she did not do it. But even as the spell became complete in her mind her mother's expression changed. Not of terror or sadness, but of peace. And that look arose again, a look of love. The same love she saw in her Father's eyes so many years ago.

This caused Dusk to lose it again; screaming and screaming, trapped in her own body. All the while being forced to witness the one punishment that no living creature deserved. This look also affected past Dusk, it made her more furious than ever. She began to work extra hard to complete the spell and her expression turned to intense hatred.

Just as the energy reached its climax, a sudden silence fell. And then light, so much light there was no single distinguishable color. This wasn't only painful for the victim, it also was excruciatingly painful for the user. She tried not to look at her mother’s face but she had no choice. Past Twilight was looking her mom right in the face relishing the screams of torment that emerged from her lips. And the light became unbearable once more, only this time, everything became blindingly white.

Suddenly Dusk was ripped form the dream and thrust back into reality. She wasn’t lying down in the stream as she was before but instead she was suspended in midair. Encased in a large purple bubble of light that seemed to be growing in both size and intensity. Then something entered her. Her whole view of life suddenly changed.

As if her personality was a lie this last few months. She then remembered the hatred she felt towards the Queen for enslaving herself, Blaze, her mother and countless others. Hatred she had never admitted or felt. Suddenly the bubble of purple exploded in a shock wave of more purple and white. The whole sky was lit up. Looking back at her body Dusk realized that she was glowing. Brighter than ever before. A strange mark appeared on her flank that she never saw before. And then she realized something more incredible than all this put together. She had wings. And she was flying.