I woodn't want to be a tree

Friendship is Tartarus

  I could already tell that it wasn't a normal day, as there was a lot more bright, sickeningly vivid colors strung up everywhere.  I could see them all when the wind carried different sights through my branches.  It's strange, having so many images coming through to you at once, but it all came strangely together.  I knew what was happening around me, and one of the things I saw that day was a new face coming in by royal chariot.  Except it wasn't royalty.  It was a purple unicorn and what I thought was a baby dragon.  As it later turned out, it was a baby dragon.

I hope that thing doesn't stay long, I thought, it being a fire-breather and all.  At the very least, that it doesn't come near me often.

  The first thing the unicorn tried to do was talk to the irritating pink one that had a high chance of a diabetic future.  That was her first mistake.  The pink pony simply gasped and zoomed off, and the unicorn looked flustered.  Apparently she was in charge of overseeing preparations for the event that called for so much pink and purple.  A Summer's Son Celebration or something like that.  It looked to me like she didn't want to be there, or at least didn't enjoy social interaction.

I think I like her, came a half-sarcastic muse from wherever my mind is.  Nopony really studied magical tree anatomy.

  The unicorn left to go do something else, and later came back to be knocked into the mud by-  THAT WAS HER, THAT WAS THE ONE THAT TRIED TO CARVE HER DUMB INITIALS INTO MY TRUNK!  Because of who I now knew as "Rainbow Dash," I had an R and half of a D itching at me.  The rainbow one then proceeded to clear the sky in about fifteen seconds, which means that I didn't get watered that day.  As a matter of fact, I hadn't been watered in a while.  Now I know why.  Nag.

  As "Twilight Sparkle", as was her name, left again, I noticed an unusually large group of ponies entering my- Oh no.  It was the pink one.  She was throwing another Celestia-forsaken party, and this time in ME.  There ponies coming in carrying things, streamers, confetti, party hats, a punch bowl, punch, a cake, an ALLIGATOR.  I heard somepony talking about spiking the punch bowl.  They had hot sauce.  Horseapples.

  It took a while to set up, I suppose, but they were in time a few minutes before Twilight showed up, accompanied by a yellow-  wait, why was she coming HERE?  What could she POSSIBLY have to oversee in the LIBRARY!?

  "...You wanna hear about today?" said the dragon.

  "Oooh, YES please!" came the enthusiastic response from the yellow pegasus.

  "I am so sorry, how DID we get here so fast?  This is where we're staying while in Ponyville, and my-" and that was all I needed to hear.

Oh Heavens, no!  Please, spare me!  Not only is it a dragon, it's a BABY dragon, he can't even control his own fire breath!

  The time to file a complaint was apparently up though.  The two entered my door, and stood in complete darkness, discussing some pony called Nightmare Moon when:

  *click*  "SURPRIIIIIIISE!"  There were ponies everywhere with hats and noisemakers and confetti and noise noise noise noise NOISE!  And that's when I learned the pink one's name was Pinkie Pie.  But then she started talking.  Oh, sweet Celestia, it was terrible.  Twilight made a good point about libraries were supposed to be QUIET.  Then she accidentally drank hot sauce and locked herself in her new room.  As for the downstairs proceedings, ponies were starting to get drunk just as soon as they all started to leave to... watch the sunrise?  I still don't get it.  Well, I was lucky.  But not lucky enough to have them leave without cleaning up their mess.

  I watched the big building in the center of town, or at least what I could get of it, when there were sudden flashes of lightning all striking right there.  I could tell it was magic lightning.  I can sort of sense magic like that.  Then I caught snatches of some very loud declarations coming from the same place.

  "Blah blah eternal night blah blah blah forever blah."  Well that didn't sound good.  I needed my sunlight.  Soon enough Twilight was back here with her baby dragon, whose name was Spunk or something, and she dragged a handful of irritating "friends" with her.  It was a sort of interesting cast gathered in that library, with a Canterlot bookworm, a wannabe-Canterlot fashionista, a tree-hugger, a future diabetic, a baby dragon, a redneck, and that nag braggart pegasus.

  Twilight layer down some lore on this Nightmare Moon she was talking about earlier from a book, and they all got the brilliant idea to go very deep into the Everfree Forest and fight that super-charged goddess pony throwing a temper tantrum.  With any luck, they won't come back.