Equestrian Airlines

by Mystical Rainboom

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, Lyra, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Nurse Redheart, Bon-Bon, Random, Derpy Hooves, Slice of Life
Length: 2154

During a flight to another location the majority of Ponyville experience air travel for some the first time others about the seventh time.

During a flight to another location the majority of Ponyville experience air travel for some the first time others about the seventh time.

While everyone is on the plane some people have as many problems as there are stars in the sky others have only one as big as the plane itself .

Who will walk away 100% sane and calm and who will go away with less than half their mind? Read and find out.

(Note: This was an early fanfic, before I had a lot of experience writing stories. It has a multiple grammar mistakes.

Please read with a lot of patience. Thank you. *squee*

Published 2014-07-03 19:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-03 19:00:01 UTC

Flight-Cadenza now boarding

             On a sunny day with plenty of clouds in the sky, the mane 6 and a bunch of other ponies were in an airport on their way to Rio De Ja-Mare-O with plenty of suitcases and personal bags full of personal objects for the ride that would last a few hours.

                      At the security line everything was going well until everybody's favorite pink mare passed the scanning line with several alarms going off." I didn't bring anything else inside I promise, " said Pinkie as she backed up  and began to be searched by a bearded staff worker. As it turned out Pinkie Pie had a few thing inside her mane and mouth and had to remove all of them making everybody in line groan due to the advancement in waiting time.

                     Meanwhile on the plane, a browncoated unicorn stallion, Rob, and a blue coated pegasus mare, Maria, both set themselves in gear to fly when the passengers arrived and a whitecoated mare stepped in to the surprise of the pilots.

                      "Nurse Redheart!? What are you doing here? We thought you were a nurse." Nurse Redheart then explained she had been laid off her job at the hospital, despite being somewhat the only nurse seen at the hospital. She was recommended to be a flight attendant. Coffee was then served and Maria was the only one to not have any. She said she once had some and lost her home with all the energy. She gained and made a promise to herself to never drink coffee again.

                     Back in line,Vinyl Scratch and her classical roomate, Octavia Melody, were behind all of the mane 6 both passing the time with conversation about rent and arguing about dishes.

"I'm telling you for the last time the wub washer cracks the plates and damages them to the point they are too fragile." Octavia exclaimed.

Vinyl responded. "Well it takes longer and is a lot more boring to do it your way. I have an idea we watch the plane movie and we decide based on that. Deal?" Octavia agreed.

              Returning to Pinkie Pie and her crazy ways of packing in her mane, she wasn't halfway through.

"…and here is my Rubber Duck… and a spoon…oooh and here is some cheese for the bread and hay bacon strips."

But suddenly, Pinkie was interrupted by the guard "ENOUGH!!!!! Ok this was my mistake I caused this j-just...just get on the plane before somebody loses their sanity or gets fired. That's likely me." And so, all the ponies were checked and boarded.

                   "For the love of Celestia, Pinkie how much hair is in your mane you pulled out so much stuff you lost 80 pounds when you finished?" questioned Applejack.

"I don't know. I once put a caterpillar in there and about a 2-3 weeks later a butterfly came out and said he had been lost in there for what felt like days." replied Pinkie Pie.

                   Everybody was sitting down and had finally boarded the plane and were ready for take off. With only minutes before flight, Rainbow Dash asked why she couldn't just fly there.

Twilight turned to Rainbow Dash. "By my calculations if the plane ride takes 5 hours at such a speed...then you, at your fastest pace in energy, would take 72 hours and pass out from exhaustion and land in the Hospital for... 5 days." Rainbow Dash then fell silent and no longer questioned anyone.

                        The plane then took off the runway and every one who wasn't a flyer either turned green or screamed except for Pinkie and Derpy, who were shouting WEEEEEEE!!!!

It had not been five minutes before Lyra Heartstrings had already found a desire for hands.

"How am I supposed to open my Diet Coke without hands. This is impossible." Lyra complained.

Bon Bon though had enough beforehand and looked for a way to silence her friend and then it hit her.

PAM!!!!!!

Somepony had accidentally let their chair down to much and had pounded Bon Bon like a dizzy accordion. Bon Bon still knew what to do about Lyra.

"Hey Lyra…I've got a bet for you." said Bon Bon. The bet was that Lyra couldn't go the entire flight without nagging about not having hands. If Lyra was successful Bon Bon would do all of her chores for one day. But if Lyra failed, she would have to snatch a muffin from Derpy; Lyra was fully knowing this was somewhat suicide. Lyra accepted this challenge preparing for any tricks.

                       Through a Microphone Nurse Redheart announced "Attention everyone instead of showing Fast and the Filly-est 6 we will instead show Iron Colt 3 for the foals on the plane thank you for choosing Equestria Airlines,". Derpy then arrived with a cart of snacks "Does anybody want this coffee stuff," she asked and a few raised their hooves. A few people shouted NO at  Pinkie Pie with her hoof in the air "Hey Twilight what's coffee," she asked and Twilight closed her book to respond "Something that if it is ever offered to you, YOU must never ever EVER drink it,"

                        As the movie started and a few watched and a few did not Twilight read her new adventure book Sands of time. Rarity decided to do her makeup next to Applejack,who decided to stare out the window and dream. In front of the other four were Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. Rainbow decided to listen to her MP3 playlist as Fluttershy took a nap. Up in the pilot room Rob was making jokes and having little luck making Maria laugh. Vinyl and Octavia were trying to find a strand of agreement in the movie's moral for their deal as while tech is awesome it can be a danger to others and they had to continue.

                     Lyra was barely passing her bet and Bon Bon was just getting started. "So Lyra…would you care for some…M&M's" asked Bon Bon. If anything would turn Lyra red in the eyes it would be this." Maybe you would like to fasten the seat belts without that headache called magic" teased Bon Bon. Lyra couldn't take it so she grabbed a bucket of popcorn shoved it on her head to avoid losing her cool.

                   Up ahead next to Rainbow Dash, who was dancing her favorite song, came Derpy with some hot soup ready for a sneezing sick colt in the back. To make things simple one sudden hoof to the gut left Dashie steaming and covered in noodles and hot soup and Fluttershy wide awake asking for a drink as Rainbow Dash ran for the restroom and locked herself in.

                Meanwhile behind Pinkie and Twilight,Rainbow Dash had accidentally made Rarity splash some makeup onto Applejack turning half of her face as white as Rarity's face and Applejack tried to keep her cool and did not yell at Rarity. Right in front of them Pinkie Pie,Who did not understand the movie at all was asking Twilight 27 different questions all about the color and it seemed Pinkie had her ears in her hair too as it seems for every time Twilight said she did not know, 5 more questions would rise out of Pinkie's mouth.

                  "So why is the suit red and yellow does he disbelieve in Orange or is he against mixing, also is it cold in that metal, Plus how does he use the restroom when he is in the suit" asked Pinkie Pie to Twilight's annoyed face who responded with stress in her teeth "I don't know" and immediately Pinkie Pie asked 10 more questions as Twilight banged her head into her book repeatedly.

                   In front Fluttershy's stomach was wave surfing like at the beach, which drew Fluttershy to near insanity. She ran in the back to use the use the restroom but it was locked, with Rainbow Dash in it. "Dash this isn't funny I really have to go to the bathroom" cried Fluttershy to Rainbow Dash. Inside the bathroom Rainbow Dash had two problems 1.In an attempt to get the hot soup off she wiped tissues on herself and stuffed them in the toilet only for it to get backed up and overflow at a loud pace where she couldn't here outside 2. The lock in the bathroom broke after Rainbow fell on the knob and she was locked in  and nobody could hear her yells for help. The pain then grew 3x worse for Fluttershy.

                  Back with Rob and Maria the two were guiding the plane when suddenly a pack of Pegasi moved some clouds in the way calling for turbulence. As the mean group laughed, Maria looked out her window and made a signal to them that was NOT safe for kids or work. As a result of screaming Pegasi, Rob stayed quiet and scared of his co-worker as she only asked did he want some salsa with a smile on her face.

                    Lyra was holding her words and was qualifying, so Bon Bon went for stronger tactics "hey don't you have some headphones Lyra can I see them". Lyra reached with one hoof and grew about 25°F more with the lack of ability  to pull out her headphones. Bon Bon then laughed knowing she had nearly reached success.

                  Twilight had asked Pinkie Pie to stop talking about 3 seconds ago...but this did not mean she couldn't sing. It had been about 89 bottles of cider on the wal and she started at 200 bottles and showed no sign of stopping. Twilight was now only thinking if it would hurt to bang her head to a wall.

                  Rarity still with her make-up had experienced turbulence and turned the area around Applejack's eyes green. After this Rarity knew she had to put away her things before Applejack would look like a cake. But due to her rush red lipstick spilled all over Applejack's mouth, who went to help a sobbing Fluttershy.

                   "RAINBOW DASH THIS HURTS SO MUCH I SWEAR YOU BETTER OPEN THE DOOR NOW!!!!!" Yelled Fluttershy in a Royal Canterlot voice. As Rainbow Dash was now swimming in flooded water unable to escape she banged on the door like a maniac. It was then Applejack looking like the Joker appeared to comfort the Pegasus that Fluttershy accidentally…let it go,making her sob just as hard and she kicked the door open and soaked Rainbow,Herself, and Applejack in thankfully unused toilet water." I'm glad the crusaders are home otherwise Cutie Mark Crusader Pilot Flyers are go" she chuckled alone.

               The movie finally ended and Vinyl and Octavia both agreed it would be best to use a faster dish washer with a MP3 player in their ears." Well I guess this is a good agreement all things considered-" Octavia paused Sniff-Sniff " Do you smell…urine"

               When Fluttershy heard this she sobbed even harder as her friends tries to cheer her up. The plane ride was ended and Lyra felt proud until Bon Bon spoke up "Wanna play a song on your…Harp". Lyra was so glad Rob and Maria landed the plane to a full stop as she jumped out the window and grabbed Bon Bon with her to tell her off "ADMIT IT I WON THIS BET AND YOU HAVE LOST THERE IS NO QUESTION ABOUT IT SO NOW YOU ARE GONNA KEEP QUIET AND LISTEN…I NEED HANDS," The two trotted away to get their bags.

               Pinkie Pie still had plenty questions about the movie,69 bottles of cider on the wall,and things that rhyme with foods, so Twilight, who was now losing it and looked as crazy as she did in the past, did what made sense RUN out of the plane as quick as possible. And Twilight did such running over a dozen ponies.

                 Rainbow Dash, ashamed of herself for flooding the back, left for the hotel to wash up and clean.Fluttershy , still filled with tears, went with her and hid. Applejack got off next , with Mares and Colts laughing at her face threatening to call Batmare, hid under her hat and tried to keep up with the others. Rarity and Pinkie Pie were the only ones to come out with a smile and say they had a decent flight.

                  When everyone left Derpy and Nurse Redheart went to the pilot room to say they were going to explore Rio and that Rob and Maria can come if they want.And they did to explore, Rob then asked Derpy what did she think of the flight and she said " It was great, but someone planned to steal her muffins and now I will make sure to beat up Lyra and Bon Bon"

After Rob and Maria got off with Derpy, Nurse Redheart went to the back to pick up her bag that she left. "Well it was somewhat easier than I expecte-… why is the floor so damp and waa-aaA-AAAH!!!