The Illogic Mandate

When Jenny awoke from her nap, she noticed it was late morning, and that there were five pegasi angrily glaring at her. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, he stared at them blearily before a cyan one with a rainbow mane and tail spoke up. "Do you have ANY idea how much behind schedule you've put us?" She asked angrily.

"Fugg-u Skittle hair." Jenny oh-so-eloquently replied.

"Come one, lets dump her and wrangle up this cloud." Rainbow growled. Rearing up to kick the cloud out from under Jenny, she felt a hand run through her mane before withdrawing. Looking at Jenny, she saw her holding a handful of skittles. Suddenly realization dawned on Rainbow as her, rather fast, brain put two and two together. "Did you just turn my mane into candy?!" She yelled.

"Fug off. I'm tired." Jenny replied, rolling over and off the cloud, smacking into a cabbage cart, which caused an exact replica of the cart to appear next to it.

"More cabbages!" The gleeful cart owner exclaimed, crying happy tears. Hopping out of the cart, Jenny finally shook the sleep from her mind and groaned.

"It's too early for me to be awake, stupid weather rats." She grumbled, before heading towards SCC for some delicious pastry filled breakfast. Upon walking into the store via lamppost, she was confronted with a large line. Going to the back of it, she noticed a meek figure behind her. Turning around, she spied the eternally adorable Fluttershy cowering behind her mane at end of the line. Jenny was then able to bear witness to three ponies cutting in line. This angered her, no one cuts in front of Fluttershy, or so her meta sources told her. Thinking fast, she withdrew a simple toy mallet from her pocket. Turning to face the three cutters, she smiled an unnerving smile at them. "So, do you three know where you went wrong?" She asked, which earned her a trio of shaken heads. "You dun cut in front of Fluttershy." She said, before thwacking the ponies on the head, permanently banning them from Equestria. "There you go, Flutters, now you don't have worry about people cutting in front of you. Because I will BAN THEIR ASSES if they do." Jenny said with a warm smile to Fluttershy, who was then allowed to cut all the way to the front of the line and buy her food.

Once the line began moving again, it only took a few minutes for Jenny to reach the front, where she ordered three breakfast muffins, two mince pies, and a breakfast milkshake, all which Pinkie procured from behind the counter instantly. Taking her food, Jenny placed a block of end-stone on the counter and walked away, leaving Pinkie to puzzle over the strange payment method. Wolfing down her food, she skipped outside and then immediately sat on a bench outside and lay down, purposely taking up the entire thing. After several hours of needlessly antagonizing ponies by hogging a bench, her vision was suddenly filled with manic lavender. Raising an eyebrow a-la-Spock, she acknowledged the lavender unicorns presence.

"I finally found you!" Twilight said in a tone not unlike that of a serial killer. "The princesses tasked me with learning everything there is about you! Now we're going to go to my basement, and I'm going to hook you up to all sorts of machines!" She continued, before refocusing her vision on where there once was a biped laying on a bench, and was now just a rapidly spinning hub cap. Looking around, she saw Jenny nearing Mach one running away from her, while carrying the bench on her back. Growling, Twilight made to teleport, before suddenly finding herself muzzled. Glaring at the offender, she noticed it was Fluttershy.

"Please don't hurt her, she stood up for me when some ponies cut in front of me... That is, if you don't mind." Fluttershy mumbled.

"She stood up for you? Then that confirms what the princesses wanted me to find out!" Twilight yelled, frightening Fluttershy to no end. "Nopony who stands up for Fluttershy could EVER be evil!" She continued, before galloping to the library whilst calling out Spike's name.

Zecora's Hut

After stopping to catch her breath, Jenny noticed she was in the middle of a deep, dark forest. Turning to her left, she saw a zebra walking down a path. Having nothing better to do until lunch, Jenny decided to follow the zebra, who entered a hut a few minutes of following later. Wandering what this zebra was up to, she politely knocked on the door. After waiting several seconds, she knocked again. Upon receiving an answer, she offered a hand to the confused zebra. "Hello, my name is Jenny Strom, what's yours?"

"I'm Zecora, and what manner of being are you?" Zecora asked.

"I, am a human! I have some pretty nifty abilities, just for your information. So, what's a zebra like you doing out here?"

"A xenophobic lot, those ponies are. Hard are they to find when my hoof steps into town."

"Could you, maybe, not speak in rhymes?"

"For you, an exception could be made, if it were not hard coded into my brain." Zecora remorsefully said.

"That sucks, so, what do you DO out what?"

"Harvesting herbs and spices, and potions I brew, a Zebrican Shamaness I am."

"Huh, think you could brew me a potion of awesome?"

"From the looks of you, such a thing would unnecessary would be."

"Haha! random stranger just complimented me for bein' awesome, can't wait to rub THAT in Rainbow 'Skittles' Dash's face. So, you got anything to drink? Coz I've kinda been lugging this bench around with me, and I'm pretty sure Ponyville needs it."

"Several herbal blends I do have, perhaps one yours shall meet?"

"Okay, speaking in rhymes is actually pretty cool, but it must make conversations difficult."

"It is why I was exiled from my home, my inability to speak in not but rhyme."

"So, tea then?" Jenny asked, hoping to get past the sudden awkwardness. At Zecora's nod, the two sat down for a lovely noon tea break, and chatted about what Jenny should avoid in the forest.

Twilight's Library

"Alright girls, I need you all to try and befriend Illogic so we can figure out whether or not she'll pose a threat, unintentional or otherwise, to Equestria." Twilight announced to her friends and Spike, who were gathered in front of her in the library's main room.

"I'll throw her a welcome to Ponyville party!" Pinkie jubilantly shouted.

"Yes, excellent idea Pinkie. Who knows. she might even become a good friend." Twilight said.

"Then I shall make her a new set of clothes, her current outfit is abhorrent and a crime against fashion!" Rarity declared.

"Ah'll giver 'er an Apple Clan welcome." Applejack chimed in.

"I'll merely acknowledge her for what she did to my mane." Rainbow Dash grumbled.

"I'll just say hello." Fluttershy mumbled once again.

"Well then, get going girls, I have some anti-psychotics to take!" Twilight said, ushering her friends out of the library.

Everfree Forest

If you were to listen closely, one would hear music booming from the inner reaches of the Everfree Forest. Standing in a clearing surrounded by all manners of Everfree fauna, stood Jenny and a cragodile, both staring the other down. In the spectating crowd, an enterprises cockatrice was collecting bets on who would win the fight, with a six hundred to one odds on Jenny, and a one to one odds on the cragodile. A manticore then roared, signalling the beginning of the fight, and in a blur both the cragodile and Jenny flash-stepped into each other, causing a rippling shock-wave to shake the nearby trees. Jumping back from the other, the two once again sized each other up, before leaping at each other a second time, only instead of lunging forwards, Jenny twisted around mid-air and launched a devastating cranial strike to the cragodile, causing it to stumble and eventually collapse, a large dent on its head indicating where Jenny struck. The forest was dead silent for a full minute before the various animals started cheering for Jenny, who collected her prize, one oversized Champion of the Everfree Champions Belt. Holding it above her head in triumph, she let out a victory shout.

Her rather interesting battle done, she pocketed the belt and walked out of the clearing, various animals bowing to her in respect. Upon exiting the forest, she found herself confronted by Pinkie Pie, who was exuberantly bouncing in some lederhosen. With a knowing glint in her eye, Jenny spoke up.

"Lemme guess, part for me?" At Pinkie's relativistic nodding, she continued "When, where, and what's the dress code?"

"Sugar Cube Corner, when you get there, and whatever you want." Pinkie answered in order.

"Bet you can't beat me there!" Jenny dared.

"You're on, sweet cheeks!" Pinkie taunted, before vanishing in a pink after image.

Sugar Cube Corner

Jumping up from behind a random chair, Pinkie rubbed her hooves together maniacally as she noted she had beaten Jenny to SCC. Removing her villainous monocle, tophat, and mustache, she set about getting into position, only to bump into something. Looking up, she saw a much older version of Jenny standing before her, complete with walking stick and hunched back.

"What took ya so long, I've been waitin' here for ages." Jenny asked in a raspy voice.

"Rats, you won." Pinkie cursed while Jenny threw off her old person costume.

"Don't feel down, I am just that awesome, after all."Jenny grinned.

"Well, now you're here. Let's Par-tay!" Pinkie bellowed, the room suddenly filling up with ponies, whilst music and decorations materialized. At once Jenny got into the party at full swing.