Applejack Goes Super Saiyan
The alarm clock rang before daylight, signaling to Applejack that she should get up and face the day. Farm work rarely let her sleep in, but at least it was good to be productive.
Yawning, Applejack stumbled down the hallway to the bathroom. Pausing in front of the mirror, she blinked, staring at herself. The bed must have really done a number on her golden mane. This morning it was a mess, seeming to stand straight up in spikes.
Rolling her eyes, she reached for her brush. However, after groping across the counter for a moment her hoof came up empty. Looking around, Applejack didn’t see the brush anywhere.
Heavy hooves walked by the door and Applejack called out, “Hey, Big Mac.”
Her brother turned to look. Applejack asked, “Have you seen my brush anywhere?”
“Er, nope.” Mac’s mouth scrunched and he looked away.
Groggy as she still was, something about that seemed unusual to Applejack, but she had other things to think about. Staring back at the mirror, she rubbed a hoof over her head but that only seemed to make her mane stand up even taller and more annoying.
Deciding to try another tactic, Applejack went back to her bedroom to get her hat. Unfortunately, it didn’t fit. It sat there perched on her pile of mane and would probably get knocked off by any doorways she went through.
Grumbling now, Applejack threw her hat on her bed and went downstairs.
Working in the orchard that morning at least got her mind off the terrible bedhead. Work gave Applejack a sense of peace in the world, hitting trees hard enough to knock loose their delicious fruit. It was almost as if delivering massive force through her strikes was actually her special talent.
Chuckling a little at that, Applejack paused to remove her hat to fan her sweaty face. Of course, she wasn’t wearing the hat, and to her surprise the drying sweat seemed to be making her mane all the more pointy.
Going through another downward mood swing, Applejack irritably turned to buck another tree. She was interrupted by a fluttering of wings and the arrival of her friend Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow gave her a strange look. “What’s up with your mane today?”
“Lost my brush,” Applejack explained. She smirked. “Now I look almost like you.”
“Heh, yeah, I’m glad you like it,” replied Rainbow. There was a faint whoosh as the joke went over her head. “Maybe you’re twenty percent more farmer than before.”
Applejack stared at her. “As if I weren’t one hundred percent already.”
She turned away and lined up a kick. Her hooves struck the tree and it exploded into kindling.
Rainbow’s jaw dropped. “How did you…”
It was a rotting tree. Applejack had known that and had meant to take it down. She started to reply, but Rainbow was already zooming away. “I’ve got to tell everypony about this! So cool!”
Applejack stood there blinking in confusion. Shaking her head, she turned back to her present task only to be interrupted by her sister Apple Bloom and two other fillies.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders, as usual, were crusading for cutie marks. Having their typical luck of it, they were intent on Applejack for help.
“Anything we can help you with, sis?” asked Apple Bloom.
“Anything cool?” amended Scootaloo.
“Or fun?” added Sweetie Belle.
“No,” replied Applejack.
“We could fix your mane!” suggested Sweetie.
Applejack almost replied “No” again, but really, could her current ‘do be any worse? Reluctantly, she agreed. The Crusaders promptly went to work.
“I think this is how my sister does it,” said Sweetie, prodding at Applejack’s head. “Although I don’t think a normal mane is supposed to do this.”
“Are you callin’ my sister abnormal?” demanded Apple Bloom.
“Well, does this look normal?” said Scootaloo, who suddenly appeared in front of Applejack’s face, hanging onto her stiff mane.
“Get off!” Applejack protested. “That ain’t normal.”
Before the Crusaders could get any more ideas, there was a sparkle of magic and five mares appeared.
“Now what is so important?” Twilight Sparkle was saying.
“Look over here!” Rainbow called. “Applejack totally exploded this tree!”
“My sister did that?” Apple Bloom exclaimed.
“Good heavens,” murmured Rarity, examining the shards of wood.
“And look at her mane!” Rainbow said, poking at the golden spires that still adorned Applejack’s head, somehow sharper now that the Crusaders had been working on them.
“Applejack, have you been feeling okay recently?” Fluttershy asked.
“Just fine,” Applejack replied. “What’s this all about?”
“An unexplained change in appearance combined with unexplained newfound strength?” Twilight mused. “I think I have a book for this.”
“It ain’t unexplained!”
“Quiet, please, I need to look something up.” Twilight summoned a book and flipped it open. “Hmm, yes. Applejack, I think I know what’s wrong with you, or rather, it’s quite extraordinary and actually nothing wrong at all that happened.”
“I know what happened,” Applejack persisted, still trying to sneak in words edgewise.
“So then when were you planning on telling us you became a Super Saiyan?” Pinkie demanded, reading over Twilight’s shoulder.
Everypony paused. “What’s a Super Saiyan?” Rainbow asked.
“It’s a state of being ascended from regular Saiyans characterized by a substantial increase in power level, blonde hair with significant body, and green eyes.”
“I was already blonde with green eyes,” Applejack tried to point out but suddenly everypony was talking all at once.
“That’s so cool!”
“I can’t believe it!”
“Significant body is right.”
“What’s a Saiyan?”
“Yay!”
“So what is Applejack supposed to do now?” asked Rarity. “Being ascended, did you call it?”
Twilight read some more from the book. “Well, it will certainly make her search for the fabled Dragonballs easier.”
Another collective round of confusion dominated before Twilight described them. “Objects that grant wishes to those that collect them.”
“That sounds awesome!” Scootaloo quipped.
“Cutie Mark Crusader Dragonball collectors!” cheered Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. The three fillies ran off.
“Why am I concerned about Dragonballs?” asked Applejack. “Besides, I’m pretty sure I’m not a Super say-what-now.”
“But the facts we know fit so well,” Twilight argued. “Admittedly, we only know three: tall blonde hair, green eyes, and high power level, but taken together that’s one hundred percent! I’m going to write the other princesses and tell them the good news!” She sent a quick letter off with a flash of magic.
“Oh, this is going to be fabulous!” gushed Rarity. “I’ll get started on a new wardrobe for all the clothes you’re sure to rip along the way.”
“But I don’t even wear-”
“And I’ve gotta throw you the best Super Saiyan party ever!” Pinkie squealed. “I’ve never done anything like this before. It’ll be super awesome!”
“This is going to be a great plot twist in my novel.” Rainbow grinned.
“It will be an interesting research project,” Twilight acknowledged.
There was a second magic teleportation, as Princesses Celestia, Luna, and Cadance arrived.
“What’s this about Applejack ascending?” Celestia asked, holding up Twilight’s letter.
“She doesn’t look like an alicorn,” Luna observed.
“That’s because she turned into a Super Saiyan!” Twilight quipped.
“Ohhhh,” the three new arrivals chorused.
“No I didn’t!” Applejack argued.
Cadance walked over and nuzzled Applejack. “Now, now, it can be difficult to adjust to being so much more powerful than you were before. It’s a big change.”
“If y’all would just listen-”
“Save it for the one-liners,” advised Celestia, throwing a foreleg around Applejack’s shoulders. “With all the mighty villians you’ll be fighting, you’ll need some witty comebacks.”
“No! I ain’t a-”
“Does anypony have a scouter?” Luna asked. “I wonder what her power level is.”
It was finally too much. Applejack reared up, throwing her forelegs skyward. “AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!” A golden glow began to sizzle around her body as her back legs left the ground. She stabbed her forehooves out in front of her, firing a blinding beam of light across the orchard, cleanly slicing off tree trunks and blasting away the top of a nearby hill.
Dropping back to the ground, Applejack’s teeth were clenched. Her lungs heaved from exertion. Everypony else carefully poked their heads out of where they had dived for cover.
“See?” said Twilight. “That was clearly a laser. You’re a Super Saiyan!”
“No, I could do that before, too,” Applejack argued. “It doesn’t prove anything.”
Just then, the Crusaders returned. “We’ve already found some Dragonballs!”
“Really?” Twilight blurted. “Well, show us!”
Apple Bloom gestured to the wagon she was pulling, motioning her sister closer to take a look.
Applejack frowned. “Uh, sugarcube, where did you get these?”
Meanwhile, in Ponyville, Spike woke up in a bathtub full of ice.
“Not...again…” he moaned.
Wincing in agony, he lifted himself far enough out of the tub to grab for a nearby bag. Pulling the drawstrings, he reached inside.
It should have been filled with magic Dragonballs to make wishes on. It wasn’t.
“Nooooooooooooooooo!”
