Twilight Writes the Best Shipfics

by Senshi

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Shining Armor, Sex, Random, Derpy Hooves, Berry Punch, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Comedy
Length: 1143

A mash-up of some of my favorite shipfics found via the card game Twilight Sparkles' Secret Shipfic Folder.

ORIGINAL CONCEPT DO NOT STEAL!

...Okay, so I know there's probably been hundreds of these done already, but it's honestly too fun of an idea to pass up. This series is going to be a mash-up of ships found during my time playing Twilight Sparkles' Secret Shipfic Folder (TSSSF), a card game revolving around matching ponies with other ponies in the worst (best) ways possible.

Most of these are probably going to be short, comedic, and random. Most of them probably won't even occur in the same universe, and many of them will likely involve sexual content! If I feel an idea is just so perfect (which is very possible) that it warrants a second chapter, I'll probably start a new series based solely around it.

If you would like to learn more about TSSSF, you can follow its tumblr here: http://tsssf-tcg.tumblr.com/
Everything you need to start playing the game yourself can be found there. If you'd perhaps like me to write on some of the ships you find on your travels through Twilight's horrifying folder, feel free to message me (preferably with a screencap of the actual cards)!
Enjoy!

Published 2014-07-24 09:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-24 09:50:01 UTC

A Night to Forget

Big Mac... was in love. Gleaming was perfect. Over the past few months, there had seldom been a time when the beautiful mare hadn't been the center of his mind's eye, gleaming like a star. In his heart of heart's, Mac knew: Gleaming Gown was going to be the mare that he would marry.

Big Mac knew that an old-fashioned mare like Granny Smith probably wouldn't approve of his devotion to some “moncy poncy” mare from Canterlot, but he was just as confident that all those thoughts would be banished the moment she saw Gleaming in a wedding dress. And if they weren't? Well, damn 'em. Damn 'em all. If anything, the flavor of forbidden love would only make it that much more sweet.

Mac had been dating Gleaming for a few months now, ever since he found her at the train station struggling with an overabundance of bags. And, as any proper stallion would, Mac had helped her! Even he would have gotten tired carrying so much luggage to a villa on the very outskirts of town, but something about Gleaming pumped energy into him. It had only taken a few minutes of conversation for him to figure out what that “something” was: love.

Despite the months of love and lust, Mac and Gleaming had yet to make love. Mac was pretty sure he had never gone though anything more painful than holding back his lust over these last few months, but he was a good, proper, Celestian, and he refused bed the beautiful white mare until their wedding night!

...Well, he guessed Proposal Night was good enough. It seemed that Mac giving Gleaming that diamond ring (braclet?) put them over an edge that was just too much for either of them to handle. They had barely made it back to Gleaming's villa and into her bedroom before she collapsed onto her bed and hiked her plot up before him.

Big Mac nickered heavily, his nose flaring and his stallionhood throbbing as he observed Gleaming's beautiful hind quarters. His mind was in a haze as he mounted her, using a hoof to guide his black length up against her lush loins. He was pretty sure he was going to have a brain aneurism as she suddenly lifted a hoof up and covered her dripping, shouting “Wait!”

Gleaming gave a little giggle as she looked back at her lover's intense face. “You're a good Celestian, right~? Well... let's save that spot for later, then~ Let's just do it here for now...”

Mac's eyes widened as Gleaming suddenly used both of her hooves to spread her flanks, exposing her puckered, ashen anus. If Mac was having troubles thinking before, his train of thought was going through a maze now! “A-Are you sure?” were the only words he could muster and stumble over.

Gleaming simply gave him a nod, to which he guided his cock up between the mare's flanks and pressed his flared head up against her puckered hole. He bit his lip, lowing both of his fore-hooves down onto the bed as he slowly pushed himself in. He instantly froze as he heard her whimper, looking down to see her biting into her pillow. She had to look back at him with intensity and tell him to keep going before he would comply.

Mac wasn't sure where his head was as he pushed his cock down into Gleaming's asshole, but it wasn't in Equestria, that was for sure. Surely, he thought, this had to be heaven. The depths of Gleaming's anus hugged his cock with a warm embrace that only seemed to suck him deeper and deeper. He wondered where all that meat was going as he forced his cock down to its base, wrapping his hooves around Gleaming and panting heavily.

Gleaming smiled back at him with a warm, lidded expression. She pressed her lips into Mac's before giggling, giving her toosh a little shake. “Is it alright...? I hope this'll do until our wedding night...”

Mac just bit his lip, not knowing what to think. He had never felt the touch of a mare's loins against his stallionhood—again, he was a proper, Celestian colt!—be he couldn't imagine anything better than this. He wanted to tell Gleaming so, but all that came from his mouth were pants and grunts. So he let his actions—specifically, his hips—do the talking as he suddenly gave her a good buck! She cried out, and cried out again as he began to repeat the motion!

Over and over again, Mac's length slid in and out of Gleaming's ass, soaking its inner walls with his precum. He breathed more and more heavily with each thrust, and so too did his cock throb harder. Eventually, he had to grunt, his whole body tensing up. “G-Gleaming, I'm...!”

“INSIDE!”

With one last, good buck, Big Mac froze up and felt a release like none other before. Wave after wave of fresh stallion milk poured from his cock and into the depths of Gleaming's anus. Even the thick plug that was Mac's length wasn't enough to hold back the tide of cum, as it eventually overflowed and gushed out, pouring onto bedsheets.

And... as Big Mac came inside of her, Gleaming was suddenly enveloped in a bright coat of light. Was... Was this what happened when unicorns had an orgasm? Big Mac would come to wish that was the case, because what lay before him—his cock still deep inside—would maim the depths of his subconscious for the rest of his life.

“WHEW! That was a trip! I was worried the spell would wear off in the middle there for a sec!” The pale white, blue maned stallion gave a satisfied sigh as he pulled himself off of Mac's cock and rolled himself off of the bed. “Thanks for the sweet lay, man! See ya!”

Mac collapsed onto his back and watched the stallion leave, the dark blue and lavender shield that made up his cutie mark being the last thing Mac saw of him before he shut the door behind him.

The red stallion just lay there in silence for a few moments, his eyes wide and his jaw agape. He then quickly pulled the cum-stained bedsheets over him and curled up into a horrified fetal position.

“WHAT THE FU--”

Author's Note

WHAT A TWEEST!

A shipfic based on these cards: http://imgur.com/QooLjRC,4Q8cTUX
to get the goal: http://imgur.com/QooLjRC,4Q8cTUX#1

Starting off with a bang using one of the most fucked up pairings that I could find! I hope you guys were as traumatized reading this as I was writing it.

I just love Big Mac's card in TSSSF. He just looks so broken. I think it fits this situation perfectly. The fact that "My First Slash" features Shining and Big Mac is just icing on the cake.