When one uses the expression, "an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a life for a life", one may assume that the speaker is talking about revenge. Revenge on someone who has wronged them. Sometimes, it's not about revenge, but an exchange.
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I never saw the truck coming. Funny, when oncoming death is knocking at your door, you think that you would get a premonition of a sort, a warning. But life and death don't work that way. A truck came and went, and sometime between those two events, I died.
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I was not there to witness it, but I can probably predict the drivers reaction. They would be pale, shaken with fear, all the while harboring the animosity that they just ended the life of a fellow human being.
God forbid I see the children's reaction. I would never be able to take Abby to Disney World. I would never be able to see James ride his bike for the first time. Those happy memories, their shining, smiling faces beaming at me, plagues me even as I sleep this dreamless sleep. As much as I want to escape death, its inevitable, for every thing has to die eventually.
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I'm sure phone calls would be made, ambulances contacted, paramedics urged to rush to the scene. All in vain. If my body wasn't dead already, sooner or later the doctors would have picked up their supplies with sad looks on their faces. Despite all they could do for others, there was nothing they could do for me.
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Actually, heaven- or wherever I am now- is not bad. I feel nothing, from the pains of my injuries to the emotional pain that I would never see my family again.
On the contrary, I was feeling apathetic, which frightened me a little. The fact that I no longer cared for my own existence made me uneasy.
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Have you ever blinked fast, then quickly shut your eyes? You all did as children, I'm sure. If you haven't, try it now. Aren't those colors intriguing? Doesn't it make you wonder about what death is really like?
My surroundings matched those very designs you just saw. They had no colors, yet they flowed seamlessly through every color on the spectrum. My cage, my prison bore those same designs. I kept opening my own eyes, trying to escape from this enclosure, but my eyes were already open. I had tried again, sweeping open my eyelids like a steel trap, but the background refused to fade from sight, refused to leave me in my own world.
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Time flowed differently in the Void. The Void. That's what I'm calling it now. It is the very essence of nothingness, a complete vacuum. Time is not right here. Nothing is right here. For all I know, what feels like an hour in here could be a year in the world I came from.
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After what feels like forever in the Void, I feel like something is watching me. What else could possibly be here?
The watching presence never fades nor approaches me. Whatever it is, I'm still alone here.
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I have been in the Void for long enough for me to get some serious thinking done. I think about my former life on Earth. I think about how much time has passed between now and that one day. I think about Abby and James. Oh God, the children. How do you tell a family that their father is dead?
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The presence I feel has remained here, never leaving. Now, I feel it drawing closer. There is no evidence in the Void that something was there, but I could feel it. It seemed to be always at the back of my mind. It is neither malevolent nor benevolent, but it's just there.
"Mortal...."
If I could jump out of my own skin, I would have. Being trapped in the Void paralyzed me. The voice continues on. I desperately cling to every word it says, hoping to discover a reason to why I am here.
"The time has come." The voice, deep and resounding, echoes through my head. It must be the presence I had felt so many times before.
"The time has come… for what?" I rasped, having not used my voice for what feels like an eternity. " Also, who- what- are you?"
The presence laughs, a deep echo that sounds and feels like nails screeching across a chalkboard.
"I go by many names, but you may call me Death. That is customary in your plane of dimension, no?"
I furrow my brow, trying to get over the thought that I am speaking with Death itself. "Well then, what the hell do you want with me?" It was probably not wise to say things like that to Death, but I had been cooped up in the Void for too long.
Death laughed again, making me want to claw at my ears and scream. "Hell, what a beautiful misconception, hell. A place of fire and sorrow, for the evil to drown in their own tears and gnash their teeth." Death paused. "If only they knew the truth."
A black, icy chill, like liquid night, began to creep down my spine. I ignored it and pressed on. "What truth? What do you mean?"
"Mortals. So inquisitive." Death mused. "Well, the truth is, little mortal, is that your species has been wrong ever since the dawn of your creation. You have acquired the belief that there is an all-powerful being out there who truly loves you."
Death continued on, its tone of voice suggesting that it was continually getting bored with explaining everything to me. "You all seem to believe that your religions were correct, that your religion was best. I have received many souls over those arguments." I was beginning to worry now, waiting for Death to get to its point. "You, are... special."
"Oh, yeah? How?"
"In a liitttllle mishap, another being was born with the same soul that you have." Death's tone only admitted his amusement in this situation. "It is not possible to split a soul," Death continued, "so the only solution is for you to take your own soul back."
I was confused. Strangely, Death noticed this. Now its voice was slightly exasperated.
"Typical mortals. Never know the really important things. You see, every sentient being has its own soul. It is not possible for two beings to share a soul."
"Since it is not possible for you two to share a soul, one of you must die."
I was still confused. "Wait," I said. "I'm already dead, so that means that I wont have to kill anyone, right?" I groaned. If that was true, then I wouldn't be here right now.
Death was getting impatient now. "Mortal, since you had possession of the shared soul first, you have the opportunity to take the soul back."
A gun appeared in my hands. I stared down at it, a feeling of dread beginning to form within me. I had never held a gun before, never killed anyone.
Death, that damn Death, it seemed to notice my apprehension. Like he hadn't before. "Would you like to see the being that has your soul, mortal?"
I was actually scared now. I wish I could just die and go to heaven, without the burden that I killed an innocent living thing. Suddenly, the scenery in the void changed, and I was in a hospital. Death was now accompanying me in a physical form; a large, powerful spectre who was adorned with a large black robe that covered its entire being.
I was disoriented and blinded from the trip out of the void. When my vision stopped swimming, I saw that the gun was in my hand. I also realized we were in a nursery, amongst the children of other people.
The metal weapon of death in my hand was pointed at one of these children.
The first thing that I thought of was the fact that the infant was a pony. Yes, a pony, complete with a hot-pink mane and tail, and wings. It was immensely adorable, and the very thought of killing it repulsed me. I turned to Death, who had been watching me with an air of expectancy.
"This...this is a PONY!" I blurted out, wanting to figure out a way to avoid killing the innocent creature. "It doesn't exist!"
"So?" Came the immediate response from Death. "It may not exist on YOUR world, or plane of existence, but it certainly is real. Either kill it, or don't kill it. Either way, one of you has to die. Oh, yes. I do believe the pony's name is Fluttershy."
I looked down at the gun in my hand, which was slightly trembling. I glanced over at Fluttershy. She was sleeping peacefully, a small lock of hair rising and falling with each breath.
There was no way I could do this. Me. A killer? Never in my life. Or in death. I gritted my teeth. This had to be done. I had to get back to the children, my family. But I didn't want to kill anyon- anypony.
I looked back at Death, who seemed to be waiting for me to pull the trigger. It looked at me and shrugged.
"A life for a life, mortal. A life for a life."
Looking back at the sleeping pony, I closed my eyes. A single tear ran down my face. I raised the gun.
My finger tightened on the trigger.
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Gasping, I immediately jolted upright. I recognized the place. This was where I died. It looked the exact same as it did before this entire ordeal happened.
Oh, God. The memories came flooding back to me. I covered my face with my hands. I... did it. I had killed somebody. I had maliciously taken a life. I groaned, feeling an immediate and powerful regret for what I had done.
As soon as I groaned, the paramedics turned around. The expression on their faces quickly morphed from saddened to happy.
"Hey! He's alive!" The paramedics rushed over to me, helping me get up and walk towards the ambulance, which was waiting to take my body to the morgue.
"DADDY!" The children's overjoyed expressions on their faces when they saw their father literally return from the dead only worsened my grief. If only they knew exactly what I had done to return to this world. They rushed over to me, tears of joy quickly replaced their tears of mourning
I did not have the same feeling as my children. I managed to put on a brave face as they embraced me.
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It took a while to convince the doctors at the hospital that I was perfectly alright, but I was finally back in my own house. Having entered my own bedroom, something I thought I would never see again, I caught sight of something that tore my heart in two.
It was the gun. The same gun that had taken a life for me to resume my own. It lay on my pillow, a reminder of what I had done to return to this place. Choking up, I opened the door to my closet and flung the weapon inside.
That did it. For the first time in years, I laid my head on my hands and wept. I don't know for how long. As the tears streamed down my face, I recalled Death's words.
One of you has to die.
I knew what I had to do now. I had taken a life from poor little Fluttershy, but Death left me with another option: I could give life back.
I was not worthy to live in a life knowing I had taken it from another. I opened the closet and retrieved the gun. For a moment, I held it in my hands, suddenly in awe of the murderer weapon. The ability to end a creature's life...
An eye for an eye
I held the gun up to my temple. There would be no contemplation for what I was about to do.
A tooth for a tooth
A single tear slid down my face, although I was smiling. I prepared to see my good friend Death once again.
A life for a life.
I hope Fluttershy knew what I did for her.
Sometimes, it's not about revenge, but an exchange.
