A 'Villainous' Friend

Chapter 4

Both Deviro and Pinkie Pie tread through the night, with the soiled dress draped over Pinkie’s back. Deviro cannot stop thinking back to the scene of the crime they had both committed, hoping that any traces of their accident had been cleaned up properly. He had entrusted Pinkie Pie with making sure everything was back in order in the upper section of the house, while he handled the cleanup in the basement. That owl just wouldn’t take its stare off of him for a second, instilling him with the fear that perhaps it saw directly into his mind, and his intentions. Perhaps it was his intense paranoia getting the best of him, and he should instead focus on the task at hoof. That being to locate this ‘Rarity’ Pinkie had spoken of, and in turn, be lead in the right direction in ultimately reaching Miss Twilight Sparkle.

Deviro follows Pinkie Pie down a path lined with an abundant assortment of flowers, a very clean and well-kept garden lies in the yard belonging to a tall, rounded building. It’s coated in wondrous decorations to the point of being almost overly gaudy. However, Deviro wishes to not waste time on judging the exterior of the building. Pinkie Pie gleefully hops to the front door, and raises her hoof, ready to knock. “Oh!” Pinkie gasps. “I just remembered! Rarity must be in the middle of her beauty sleep by now, I should knock quietly, and I have just the thing.”

“Good, what is it you have prepared?” Deviro asks. Pinkie Pie reaches into the pink, puffiness of her mane, and takes out a puffy oven mitt. She bites the end of her tongue as she cautiously sticks her hoof into the mitten. Deviro watches, nearly disturbed by Pinkie’s perfuse sweat and strain in her eyes. Not wanting to rush her, as he remembers the last time he had interfered with her actions, he waits somewhat patiently for her to get the mitten over her hoof. Once her hoof is fully concealed by the mitten, she leans in closer to the door, and drawn by the curiosity of her plan, Deviro leans closer as well to observe. Just as he waits for her to knock, he is startled by the sudden slam into the door with her own head. Deviro watches in absolute terror as she repeatedly smashes her head into the door whilst screaming to the top of her lungs.

“Rarity! Wake up! It’s Pinkie! Hello?! Are you awake yet?!” She screams. After her intense shouting and banging, a light switches on in a window on the upper level of the building. “There! She should be awake now.” Deviro stands, still in fear from the sudden attack on the door, and can’t help but watch her jitter and bounce with excitement as she waits for the door to be answered. The door knob twists, and a piercing light flees from the doorway. Deviro stares as a shadowed figure stands in the doorway, it takes a step forward, sending a chill up his spine. What is revealed is what he believes to be a mare with a nappy, violet mane that nearly covers up her furious eyes. Her mouth a gaping open, as if to draw the soul right from Devrio’s mortal body.

“Ah! Stay back you fowl wench! I’ve read about hideous creatures such as you, and I won’t allow you to perform any sort of wicked acts upon me with your witchcraft! I swear, if you should take but one step closer, I will not hesitate to drive a wooden stake right through your grimy, rotted heart!”

“My word! How dare you come bashing my door in the middle of the night, only to shout such brash things?!”

“Heed my warning witch! I’m willing to put forth many shillings on the idea that you had in fact taken the one called ‘Twilight’, dismembered her corpse, and devoured her remains with a crooked smile upon your already contorted face!” As Rarity and Deviro lash out at each other, Pinkie Pie watches as her eyes dart back and forth between the two, unsure of what to do to ease the tension.

“Make one more comment about my face, and I swear I will rip yours right off! Why don’t you go ahead and leave?! You seem to have brought a rather unpleasant stench to my porch!”

“Um . . . guys?” Pinkie says, trying to break the argument.

“You would do such a thing wouldn’t you?! You cave-dwelling demon!” Deviro continues to shout.

“Oh! So now you’re going to talk poorly about my home are you? Well, by the looks and stench of you, it wouldn’t surprise me if you crawled right out from the nearest sewer pipe!” Rarity yells.

“Guys, wait. . .” Pinkie attempts once again to end their intensifying shouts.

“I’m warning you for the last time, step back or this will be the end of you!”

“I dare you to try! And you just watch what happens!”

“Wait!” Pinkie Pie screams, silencing the both of them. “There’s something I just have to know. . . Devrio, is that you’re natural smell? I thought it was some kind of super-expensive cologne! Either way, I think it’s wonderful.” Pinkie Pie leans in near Deviro, only to take a huge whiff of the air near him, followed by a pleased sigh.

“By the Sun of the Seven Sapphires, is my supposed odor indeed that . . .” Deviro takes a moment to intriguingly sniff the sleeve to his robe, and his face scrunches from disgust. “Well. . .” Deviro clears his throught. “Nevertheless, my scent is out of the question! The reason Miss Pie and I have visited your property, is to—”

“Fix this dress!” Pinkie Pie holds out the soiled dress, widening Rarity’s eyes with shock.

“Goodness! Just what in the name of Celestia—? How did it end up this way?”

“I’m sorry Rarity, it’s classified.”

“It’s what?”

“Exactly.”

“. . . Well, do come in. We must tend to this straight away before these stains settle in.” Pinkie Pie follows Rarity inside, leaving Deviro to mutter miserably to himself.

“We-we came for . . . the whereabouts of a Miss . . . Twilight . . . Sparkle. . .” Now abandoned, he observes the doorway in a curious manner, unsure if he should pass through. There’s something blocking him, something not in reality, but something engraved in his mind that’s now reemerging from the familiarity of his current situation. Something small, but something he wanted to forget regardless, along with all the other memories of his early years. Dozing off, victim to his calling memory, he remembers a time similar to this.

“Come Cirsay, we wouldn’t want to be late once again now would we?”

“No. . .”

“You do remember how upset your brother was when he found out he was late, correct?”

“Yes, sir.”

“I don’t want to have to go searching for you again, so please, stay nearby.” Cirsay, too ashamed to look up to his superior, hides his face, only to get a glance at who he had to call ‘brother’ whom was watching him with a despicable stare. The three of them approached the finely decorated doorway, which was answered almost as soon as they set hoof on the porch. A jovial, aged mare caked in make-up answered the door, and by the sound of her voice, Cirsay could already tell she was ready to comment on him. He tugged at the collar of his white dress shirt, and stared to the ground.

“Ah! Mister Pollington! A joy it is to see you at my doorstep this fine morning,” says the well-dressed mare.

“Quite a joy to see you as well Miss Marie,” says the tall stallion Cirsay and his brother have been following.

“Hello Miss Marie!” The brother greets. Cirsay despised that disgusting smile he wore on his face, it made him clench his teeth out of anger. He pretended to be this kind and gentle colt that could do no wrong, but Cirsay new the truth, nopony would ever believe him no matter what he said. In fact, it was the things he said that gave others that same idea of him. It was a battle he could not win, which led to his silent forfeit.

“Oh, darling little Naven, I never get tired of seeing that big smile of yours! And, hello to you too Cirsay, I’m quite surprised you’re dressed up this time. . . Excuse me Cirsay!” The mare’s tone shifted, forcing Cirsay to look up to her enraged expression. “When someone’s speaking, you should look them in the eyes. I’m sure Mister Pollington has already taught you this, yes?”

“Of course, but . . .”

“Yes, yes, it’s always ‘buts’ with you Mister Pollington. I mean no disrespect, but you need to straighten this boy out. You did such a good job with Naven, why can’t you do the same with Cirsay?”

“Well, Miss Marie, I’m sure we don’t want to keep Naven waiting,” says the stallion, clearly running low on patience.

“Oh, of course. Come Naven, your friends are waiting.” As Naven and the stallion enter the mare’s home, she holds out her hoof to Cirsay just as he is about to enter as well. “Cirsay, would you mind staying out here for a moment. You can come in shortly. Just . . . a moment.” She closed the door in Cirsay’s face, and without any other choice, there he sat. Alone, he waited, and just as he expected, Miss Marie hadn’t come back for him. This was the moment where his mind had finally had enough, the moment where he would no longer be a victim.

Broken free from his troubling memories, he finds himself standing in the middle of Rarity’s living room, surrounded by ornamental furniture. His eyes widen, and his legs tremble. “W-What? How did I get in here?”

“I dragged you in here silly! You were just standing out there like a statue, so I brought you in myself!” says Pinkie Pie. In a flash, Deviro trots and trips to the shiny tiled floor, scrambling to the door.

“No! I should be outside! They never wanted me inside! Leave me!” He screams.

“Deviro! What’re you doing? Come on! We gotta meet up with Rarity!” Pinkie Pie explains, trying to pull Deviro back into the room. However, she struggles with his tight grip on the doorway. She strains, yanking on the end of his robe to bring him back inside. Eventually, she tears Deviro from the doorway, sending them both tumbling backwards across the floor. Their momentum ends with them sliding on their backs to Rarity’s hooves as she stares down at the both of them.

“Would you two please settle down, you’re bound to make a mess with that kind of roughhousing,” says Rarity.

“We’re not roughhousing, we’re on a secret mission!”

“Is that so? And what kind of ‘secret mission’ are you going on about?”

Noticing an opportunity to perhaps move further in his search for Miss Twilight, he attempts to explain to her once again. “We are trying to locate a Miss Twi—”

“Fix this dress!” Pinkie Pie exclaims, holding up the soiled dress in her hoof.

“Oh, yes, right. Well, follow me then.” Rarity takes the dress, and begins walking further into her home with Pinkie Pie happily hopping behind. Deviro lays, shot down for the second time. Helplessly, he holds out his hoof in a desperate attempt for their attention.

“No . . . wait . . . Twilight Sparkle! I-I need to know. . .” However, it’s hopeless, as they continue to stroll down the hall.

With Deviro now begrudgingly following behind, he feels that if he allows them to continue worrying about this dress, then he’ll never learn about Miss Twilight’s whereabouts. Nearing Pinkie Pie’s side, he taps her on the back to get her attention. “Excuse me, Miss Pie?” He asks.

“Yes Deviro?”

“I do believe it’s time to get to the point and inform Miss Rarity of the ‘real’ reason we’re here.”

“Really? Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am indeed certain.”

“Okay, if you say so! Hey Rarity!”

Rarity sighs. “Yes, darling?”

“My friend Deviro wants to know something.”

“And what is it exactly that miscreant needs to know?”

“He would like for you to give him a whole makeover!”

“Pardon?!” Deviro gasps.

“Oh dear, well, I suppose I could, but it would be quite a lot of work. Judging by the looks of it, it may be one of the most difficult tasks I’ve ever been given. However, I don’t see any reason to grace him with my talents, I’m afraid he’ll just have to remain a disgusting mess.”

“Oh please! He said he just loves your style, he just wouldn’t stop talking about how beautiful the dress looked before it got totally ruined!”

“What?! I said nothing of the—”

“Take it from me, Deviro and I go way back. All the way back to this morning. Trust me, he’s just a little cranky because of his smell.”

“Wha— . . . I—”

“Please Rarity! He was begging me to tell you, because he didn’t know how to tell you himself.”

“Hmm. . .” Rarity ponders. “Well, if that’s true, then I suppose I could lend a hoof in giving him a bit of a makeover.” Without a chance to try and speak again, Rarity grabs hold of his foreleg. “But! If we’re going to do this, we need to act quick! This may take all night!” Immediately, Deviro’s heart sinks to the bottom of his chest.

Pinkie and Rarity bring him into a big room filled with stacks of fabric, other sewing materials, and a big round stage where they make him stand. “Now, just be still, and hold this for me,” says Rarity.

“B-But, I need to find—!” Rarity shoves a pin cushion in Deviro’s mouth, and begins bolting around him with a measuring tape taking measurements of his legs and waist. Deviro stands for what feels like hours as Rarity sketches and writes notes in a little notebook as she collects the fabric. He glances over to Pinkie Pie, in agony from being so stiff for so long, but she just watches him with a reassuring look on her face.

“Right then! Just give me a few minutes, I will return momentarily,” says Rarity as she rushes out the door. Pinkie Pie approaches Deviro, and for a moment, removes the pin cushion that’s been stuck in his mouth the entire time.

“So, how are you feeling so far Deviro?” She asks.

“Ah! Twilight Spark—!” Pinkie Pie shoves the cushion back in his mouth.

“You’re doing good Deviro! I’m sure you’ll look great by the end!” Suddenly, the door opens a tad, and Rarity pokes her head inside the room.

“Pinkie Pie! Be a dear and bring Deviro to the washroom to get him all cleaned up for me please?” Rarity asks.

“You betcha!” Rarity shuts the door, and Pinkie Pie grabs hold of his foreleg to drag him to the bathroom near by the stage. She pushes him into a white bathtub and shuts the shower curtain on him.

“W-What is this?” Deviro asks.

“It’s just a shower silly, now throw over your cape!”

“It’s a robe.”

“Throw over the cape!” She screams. Frightened, Deviro tosses his robe over the top of the shower. “Now hold on a sec! This looks like some new, fancy shower! It looks like the water controls are out here. . . Don’t worry, I’ll make sure I get the water nice and comfortable.” Pinkie Pie starts turning the little vavles, and water starts spurting from the showerhead. Almost as quickly as the water started, Deviro starts screaming at the top of his lungs. “It feels good right?”

Deviro can barely form words, as the burning almost forces him to scream incessantly. “Ahh! No! Ahh! It burns!”

“Oops, that must be the hot valve. . . How about now?” She asks, turning the other valve; but still, his screams only continue.

“Ahh! It’s f-f-freezing!”

“Oh, these must be really sensitive. . . I know! I’ll just keep turning them and maybe it’ll balance the hot and the cold! Duh! Silly ol’ me.” Crazily, Pinkie Pie turns both valves without recourse, sending bursts of scolding hot, and freezing cold water straight to Deviro’s already suffering body. His screams of horror only intensify, and with every burst of cold and hot water, the pitch of his screams change nearly every time. So much so, that he feels his lungs are just about to give out, and his throat is thrashing. It’s only after several minutes of pain that she notices the sticker in-between the two valves that reads: ‘Have BOTH Valves Turned Towards The CENTER For Warm Water’. “Ohh . . . I guess that makes sense too.” She turns the handles of the valves toward each other to the center, and Deviro’s screaming finally ends. “How’s that?”

“Better,” he says in relief.

“Good! Oh, and make sure you use shampoo for your hair!”

“Use what?”

“The purple bottle!” Deviro searches the shower, and indeed finds a transparent, purple bottle filled with a thick liquid. He pops open the cap, and peers closer into the little hole in the cap, wondering how he’ll get any of that out. Judging by the weak form of the plastic bottle, perhaps with a strong enough squeeze, he’ll get some out. With his eye near the hole, watching to make sure he makes progress; he slams his hooves against the bottle, sending a stream of shampoo directly into his eye. Almost instantly, he can feel the pain of the severe stinging, and once again, his almost filly-like screams begin anew. “Did you find it?”

“Ahh! My eyes!”

“Of course silly! That’s what you use to find the bottle!”

“Noo! It burns!”

“It’s okay! That just means it’s working. . ! I think.” Deviro, now blinded, drops the bottle and stumbles around the shower. His hoof steps on the smashed bottle, causing him to lose balance, and plummeting down against the hard floor with a loud thud. “Are you okay in there?” Deviro moans in agony. “Do you want me to try turning the valves again?”

“No! Please just . . . no! Ugh, I need you to just leave! I can complete this task on my own!”

“Oh I see, you need a little privacy. No worries, I’ll be right outside if you need something.” Deviro listens to the graceful sound of the door opening and closing, and the absence of Pinkie Pie’s voice fills him with relief. With the pain in his eye subsided, he picks up the shampoo bottle, and glares at it.

“Fowl contraption!” He mutters angrily. He notices the liquid dripping from the cap and over his hoof, and with the feeling of having finally defeated the ‘shampoo bottle’ task, he applies the liquid to his hair until it becomes a bubbly mass. After he gets himself all washed, he exits the shower unsure of what to do next. “Um . . . Miss Pie!”

“Yes?” She sings from behind the door.

“What do I—? How long were you standing near the door?”

“Ohh the whole time.”

“. . . Right, well, what is my next assignment in completing this cleaning process?”

“You just have to dry yourself off! Easy-peasy!”

“Dry myself? But with what?” Deviro scans the rather large washroom, which he couldn’t get a good look at the first time as he was aggressively shoved into the shower, and he cannot find anything that would make sense in drying him off. However, he does find another door. Upon checking what’s inside, he notices a couple rather mysterious devices. He walks closer to investigate them further, and finds that one of them is labeled with a sticker that reads: DRYER. “I suppose this is what I’m meant to use. Perhaps I get into this device through here. . .” He opens the lid at the top of the cube-shaped device, and climbs inside. He inspects the several dials on the machine’s dashboard, and presses the ‘start’ button. Gradually, the small compartment in the machine begins turning, causing Deviro to lose his balance and fall into the machine with the lid slamming right above him. He tries to pop the lid back open, but he cannot regain his coordination with the constant spinning.

From the next room, Pinkie Pie sits with a magazine in her lap; licking her hoof and flipping through the pages. Until she hears a faint sound, what she believes to be Deviro’s muffled screams. “Keep practicing Deviro! You’ll get better at singing the more you practice!”

After several minutes of tumbling and heat, the machine rings, signaling that the cycle is finished. Deviro pops open the lid, and climbs out from the machine gasping for breath. He feels completely cooked, as the fur from his coat and his mane steam with heat. He crawls over the cool floor, struggling for air, until Pinkie Pie bursts through the door. “What was that?! I head a ‘ding’! Is it cupcakes? Danishes? French toast?!” With hopeful gasping, Deviro reaches out to Pinkie Pie for assistance. “Wow Deviro! I didn’t know you were practicing to be an actor too! First singing, and now this? You’ve got some real talent. Oh! Oh! Let me try!” Pinkie flops to the floor, mimicking Deviro’s twitching and gasping.

“Are you just about done? I’ve got. . .” Rarity peers around the doorway, only to see both Pinkie Pie and Deviro in the middle of what appears to be a seizure.

“We’re practicing our acting skills!” Pinkie explains. “And if you ask me, I think Deviro’s got me beat.”

“Right, well you two can practice later, I have your outfit all ready for you! Come and let’s get this on you!”

“Wooh! Let’s go!” Pinkie Pie cheers as she drags Deviro’s steaming body out through the doorway and posed back onto the stage. Rarity dresses him in a white, collared shirt, and a black vest.

“Alright, this is looking good,” says Rarity as she buttons in the shirt. “Now for the final touches.” Rarity pulls out a jar of what appears to be gel, applies a glob of it to her hoof, and begins styling Deviro’s mane until it’s smooth and sleek. Finally, she pulls out a black, round hat with a wide brim, dusts it off, and carefully places it on the top of his head. “Viola! Get ready to meet, the new you!” Rarity hold up a mirror to him, and he sees just how stiff he is in his new clothes. He’s mostly thankful that the burning from the machine has gone away, but not for the fact that he can barely move his limbs from the tightness of the clothes. “What do you think of your new look?”

“It’s . . . It’s . . ! It’s absolutely wonderful,” he says, biting his lip, no longer seeing the point in fighting back.

“Oh splendid! And if I may add myself, you do look rather fabulous.”

“Oh my gosh!” Pinkie shouts.

“What is it Pinkie?”

“All this excitement made me forget something really important! We never got to the whole reason we came here for!” Deviro’s eyes light up. He can feel his pain and agony finally coming to a close, and she’ll bring up their main purpose at last. He stands, eagerly waiting for the words to leave Pinkie Pie’s mouth. “We forgot all about the dress!”