Trixie's New Assistant

by SwiperTheFox

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Trixie, Sex, Discord, Slice of Life, Human, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 6755

Trixie tries to summon a mystical demon from another world to help her... instead getting a human.

Because sometimes a beautiful unicorn with a wonderful flowing mane and a tender, soft body makes mistakes, and what she thinks will help her get revenge against Ponyville hecklers ends up partly backfiring. Because sometimes that unicorns, looking very sexy as far as cartoon horses go, loves all the attention from their new human assistants, and decides that-- for her next trick-- she'll make his virginity disappear. Also, sometimes further monkeying with magic might involve a certain draconequus showing up.

This second-person ‘you’ m/m human-x-pony romance with Trixie is a tribute to TAW, thebandbrony, and other authors with this style. Thanks to Royal Guard Tictac, who requested me to write a fic involving Discord. Thanks also to everyone for reading. Image by the great Caninelove on Zerochan.

Published 2012-04-12 00:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-12 00:14:02 UTC

What, Another Human In Equestria?

You immediately clutch you head with your hands, coughing profusely. The mist just seems to seep into every last inch of your body. You let out an angry moan, and you try to kick. Your feet and legs don't quite obey. You blink, hoping to see something besides the endless cloud of grey nothingness.

Suddenly, a smooth midday breeze goes over your face. You throw your arms forward and feel your same old usual street clothes on. Oh, geez, did someone slip me a mickey or something? You reach over and rub against something wet, feeling like your everyday green grass across a field. Or was that some bad acid?

"Of course! The spell has had a success, finally," says a loud, feminine voice somewhere close in front of you. "It took bucking long enough." You shut your eyes for a while, reaching over to rub some kind of weird crinky crust from them. You blink once more and gaze out at a clear blue sky, hardly a cloud out.

Success? What the hell? You shuffle yourself back on your feet sitting down. You glance left and right at the picturesque Maple trees around you. You've found yourself in a nice little forest clearing, birds chirping way overhead, but you can't place that voice anywhere. Who the hell is that girl?

"You're oddly... skinny for a demon," says the girl right behind your left shoulder. You quickly scurry around. Your eyes grow wide as saucers as you gaze at what's in front of you. Your heart begins to race, fingers rubbing against your shorts.

She looks vaguely like a horse, although her body just seems to shine from this inner energy. Your eyes run up the tips of her hooves along her legs and body, totally sleek and smooth with the sort of feminine curves that you'd see on a movie actress, over to her huge cape waving about in the wind. Her hair flows down across her shoulders onto her purple, star-covered cape. In one sense, she looks like one of those renditions of Venus, goddess of love, with those silky locks against her body. In another sense, her sky-blue mane appears as frizzy and welcoming as cotton candy.

"A little on the skinny side," she says, "and also on the oddly well-dressed side. On the 'not as many claws, fangs, tentacles, horns, and brute muscular strength side as Trixie had hoped' as well." You can hear her excitement drain out of her voice as she goes on. You can hardly care; you feel transfixed by her face. Her adorable, curly features complement her huge, deep eyes with this shiny purple sheen inside of them. "Well, no matter. You're here. It worked."

So, she calls herself 'Trixie'. You glance up at a horn jutting out of her head and rubbing up against her purple magicians hat, reminding you of Mickey Mouse from that one cartoon with the evil brushes. "I'll be damned, she really is a horse," you murmur. Not a horse. A freaking unicorn. A magical, talking unicorn. You feel like fainting.

"You say something?" Trixie calls out in a confident voice. You can't think of anything to say, so you just shrug. The unicorn walks closer, saying something else. You zone out, feeling some kind of after effects of whatever sent you here in the first place. Some spell? Wait... did she say demon? I'm a freakin' 'demon'?

You find yourself instinctively holding up your hands in the air, wondering if they're even still hands. You wiggle those ten fingers of yours, totally no different than when you fell asleep last night, but you see this cartoon-like character in front of you. The area around you also isn't like any park you've ever visited. You can't understand it-- everything, even your own body, has this sunny, sugary pastel shading all over.

"Hello, wake up!" The unicorn steps right over to you and taps your shoulder with a hoof. "Earth to demon. Earth calling demon."

"Quit it," you moan. She leans back, a puzzled look flashing over her immesenly pretty face.

"Did you just... talk back to me?" She curls her head up, hooves digging into the wet grass. "The Great and Powerful Trixie? Your summoner and master?"

"Uh..." You scratch your head nervously. "Yes, I just did?" Master? Summoner?

"Trixie will not stand for this insubordination!" She wiggles her mane around her sides, walking around your back. "Trixie has slaved over decrepit notebook after decrepit notebook to invoke the forbidden spell, punishable by decades in prison, and now has it fallen to pieces?"

"Can you please at least tell me where I am?"

"Silence!" Trixie strikes an overly melodramatic pose, back arched and hooves pointing at you as if to fire an imaginary missle. You can't help thinking of Fire Mario shooting a ball of flame. "Silenceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..." She mutters the word again, stressing the last letter in a way that sounds like steam escaping from her clenched teeth.

You smile, putting your left hand to your mouth and making the imaginary zipper expression.

"That's better," Trixie remarks, closing her eyes and moving her hooves through her cape. "Now, then, the Great and Powerful Trixie welcomes you to Equestria-- the land of unicorns, pegasii, and earth ponies. And..." She taps a hoof against her cheek. "There's also dragons and... other stuff. Whatever." She clears her throat, again playing up the drama. "Now, the Great and Powerful Trixie has summoned you here using her awesome and mighty magical powers in order to join my new force."

"Force?" you wisper, although you snap back to silence.

"You, despite your," she gives you a quizzical look as she moves on, a hoof reaching along the back of your shirt, "lack of impressive outward abilities and features, have the honor of being my closest subordinate and comrade-- leading Trixie's superb fighting force as per my instructions." She locks eyes with you, seeing that you feel both confused and amused while also barely impressed. "You may, uh, speak now."

"Why the hell am I leading an army, why the hell did you want to summon demons, why the hell do you think you're my master, and-- most importantly of all-- how the hell am I standing here right now?" you call out, voice building with each phrase. Trixie sits down, a combination of one part regret, one part fear, and three parts frustration going over her face. You watch her ears droop.

"Trixie has, sadly," she replies, standing back up and walking around you once more, "been thrown out of Ponyville in disgrace. Kicked out by those, those--" Her face contorts, teeth almost biting her lip. "'Neigh-sayers' out there. Those morons. Those clowns. Those that refused to understand the power and glory of Trixie." She suddenly turns and looks face to face with you, determined. "They shall pay for their ignorance at the hands of us. Together. Trixie and her loyal companion."

"I'm..." You stand straight up. Trixie immediately frowns at having to look at someone so much taller. You hold out your hands, leaning your head back. "I'm not interested. In that. At all." You turn to eye the gravel path through the crowd of Maple trees.

"But Trixie," she starts to reply back, voice gone down to a whisper, "summoned you here. Brought you here. That means, you obey me. Right?"

"Right," you moan back sarcastically. Did I ask to be brought you, you little prostitute-dressed sprite? You take a few steps away. I guess I give her 'magical' credit for bringing me her, in the sense of not killing herself and having sheer dumb luck. Surprised she hasn't turned herself into a toad. Everything about her screams: fraud. A sexy fraud. You curse your twenty-something male hormones.

"Halt!" Trixie commands, scurrying out in front of you with a hoof in the air. You simply lean to the side and step over her body, her tail brushing up against your Converse sneaker. She lets out an angry sigh.

You take a few teasing steps along the path, eyes focused on the twisted ways across mossy rocks and little puddles. You hear Trixie shuffling about behind you. What the hell is she up to now?

"Trixie will," she calls out, leaping in the air along your side into a path of bushes. She clops her hooves against some rocks, head suddenly popping out of a patch of rhododendrons. "Trixie shall it prove to you, assistant." You keep walking. She trots alongside you, throwing herself onto a mossy old stump in a fork in the road.

"Prove what to me?" If this is a dream, I want to make up. If for some unholy reason this is real, I need to find a real pony that knows what the hell is actually going on.

"I shall summon the rest of your race-- more compatriots! Those that you shall command!" Trixie stands up, backing up against a thorny bush. "Ow!" She flicks to the side and rubs her back. "I... uh..." She looks at you, at the two paths in the road, and way back at the clearing once again. "Be right back!" She speeds away.

"Okay..." You close you eyes, taking a deep breath. This is like... it's almost like that 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit' movie or something. However, you're actually living it.

Trixie pops up to your left side with a huge smile on her face, so big that it seems to burst right off of her cheeks. You glance down and see a gigantic tray that she's somehow levitating. You see a blue aura around it, and you immediately connect it with her blue glowing unicorn horn. Well, that's... that's something at least. Do all unicorns do that? You strain to think back to your Greek mythology classes in High School.

"I still have the necessary ingrediants for more summoning," she says, mostly talking to herself as she pokes around the various items on the tray. "Of course, Trixie had to use a lot for you." She grits her teeth, voice getting deeper and angrier. "Trixie also had to try the spell quite a few times to end up making you appear, which is totally unlike what a certain griffon with an eyepatch had said." She let out a deep breath. "Trixie will make sure that he needs two eyepatchs before long."

"Ahem..."

Trixie glances up at you. "Oh, yes, right." She sets the tray down and begins rattling off some quite nonsense-type words. You see her eyes shrinking and her horn glowing brightly. Still, your eyes scan the tray for anything of any consequence-- seeing the back third of what looks like a monkey's skull, something like a rose with yellow poka dots on blue, bits of some kind of tree bark, what seems like a ruby shoved into a marshmallow Peep, and various other things-- that don't register at all. You sigh, scratching your posterior.

"Trixie, sweetie," you say, trying the nice approach, "I don't think--"

"Shama lama ding dong!" Trixie suddenly sings out, hooves pointed straight in the air as blue energy flows off her body. "And you're my... oh, yeah..." She blinks, ears shooting to the sides. "Shama lama, baby, rama lama ding dong!" She clicks her hooves against the ground, her eyes turning upwards. "Oh, yeah! You put the ooh, mau-mau... oh-oh-oh-oh..."

"That... can't be..." You feel like groaning.

"Back into my smile child!" Trixie wiggles her hips, a white tip forming upon her horn as she sings. "Hey, yea, that is why, that is why--" She takes a big gulp. "You are my sugar doo-dee-dop!"

"Trixie?"

"SHAMA-LAMA-DING-DONG!" Trixie screams, hooves turning down and shooting a big ball of electricity straight into the tray. You find yourself jumping four feet backwards, letting out a girly squeal of surprise. At first the tray just sits there and looks as lit up as Times Square.

*Foom!*

You watch a black cloud waft up into Trixie's face. She coughs again and again, hooves waving. You start to walk over and help, but she steps backward and kicks the tray with all her might. Your eyes follow it across a patch of dandelions across a pond and down a hilly slope.

"Those fools! They shall pay for defrauding Trixie!" She sits down and sticks her head straight out, screaming as she wags her hooves like fists. She pauses, and she coughs one last time. Finally, Trixie turns and curls her head against her shoulder. You move a little closer, mostly just by instinct. You can hear a soft murmur along with what sounds like tears, although the brook a few yards up ahead might be playing with your senses.

"It's okay," you say. You never were one for talking to pretty girls, especially the bratty girls-- which tended, of course, to be the most pretty ones. Think of something!

"Yes, it's okay!" She snaps back up and positions herself right in front of you. Although you stand so much taller, she seems to meet you eye to eye just by determination. "Trixie never fails. Trixie just encounters momentary obstacles that require her to adapt her plans to differing circumstances subject to altering constraints."

"Gee, with that turn of phrase you should be White House Press Secretary."

"At least," Trixie says, voice going back to that silky, feminine tone, "I have you."

A weird, cuddly sort of feeling erupts inside your chest. You both know that she didn't mean to sound that way, but she did. You see the color drain from her face, and she sits down on the path. She scratches her head, and you can't help but mimic her. She magically lifts open an ancient looking book from over your head. You squint at the beat-up title and worn back cover picture, but all you can make out is the modern-looking label 'Personal Property of Twilight Sparkle'.

"Twilight Sparkle?" you whisper to yourself. "Is that a person's name? It sounds like a freaking discount shampoo from Wal-Mart. 'Hello, can I use two coupons for my family-size bottle of Twilight Sparkle, please? I know that it says no doubling.' Huh."

"Hey!"

You snap to attention.

"Bow before the sexy and attractive Trixie," she commands, eyes closing and chin curling up in a sort of regal pose.

"How about no!" you holler in your best Dr. Evil impression. You fail to add the "crazy Dutch bastard" part since it would probably zoom over her head, although the way in which she says "sexy and attractive"

"How about now?" She leans down, almost looking like she's now bowing to you. It looks odd, and you feel inclined to say something until her horn sparkles brightly. You watch a trail of bluish, clear goo-- almost like mystical toothpaste-- slinks through the air and moves up to your chest. It almost touches you but instead reflects to the side at a ninety degree angle. You feel reminded of "Well?"

"Well, what?" You fold your arms in annoyance.

"Well, Trixie sees that you--" She flickers through a bunch of pages. "Are apparently resistant to magic by your very nature from the world in which you came from." She puts a hoof through her silky mane. "And, Trixie supposes that said qualities, along with your tall appearance, light skin, mostly lack of body fur, high intelligence, and insubordinate attitude must make you a--" She pauses, losing her train of thought. She glances up at you, eye to eye. Despite everything, she looks too amazingly pretty for you to feel mad or frustrated with for too long.

You begin, "My name is--"

"Homo economicus!" Trixie hollers, a hoof smacking against a page besides the back cover. She smirks, laughing a bit. "That's a rather, uh, unique race." She leans back.

"I guess we are."

"And, given that you appear to be a male and in between the ages of fourteen and thirty four, it seems that I must-- oooh," her expression contorts into something like a duckface as she scans an endnote. She pants nervously for some reason as she flips back to the middle of the book, then back to the end once again. "It can't be."

"Is something wrong?" You try to lean over and peek at what she's reading.

"Nothing, nothing's the, uh, matter," she stammers, smacking the book flat against her chest. She makes a soft whistle, rubbing her mane along her cape. "Trixie understands that, uh, your own world has certain-- ways of doing things. Certain ways of establishing rewards and incentives for motivating given behavoir. You have inherent..." She strains to find the right word. "Needs."

What the hell is she talking about? You lean up against a lanky Maple, head resting upon your hands. I've had way, way to much of this stupid ping-pong conversation. Trixie looks as edgy as if you had just told her she had fire ants crawling up her back, hopping in place and twitching her head around.

"Shall we go to my cabin and spend some time together, my new assistant?" she says, emphasizing her adorable face and putting on the charm all of a sudden.

You reflexively nod, the male hormones talking. You follow her as she trots down the left side of the fork in the road. As you step along, you strain to find something else to say. All in all, you feel too overwhelmed to really think to well. Still, the term "cabin" doesn't exactly inspire confidence-- you flash back to Wrong Turn, Deliverance, Last House on the Left, and a bunch of other spatter movies on late-night cable.

"Here we are," Trixie announces, pointing over at a cozy three-room brick house atop what looks like a gigantic pile of moss. The red and grey brick sides and the soft light emanating from the windows reminds you more of one of those kitsch Thomas Kinkade paintings than anything sinister. Trixie trots through the small forest clearing up to the front door. She winks at you.

You look back blankly. She lights up her horn and magically slides open the door. You step over, glancing around at the various vines and patches of grass along the sides of the house. The door looks plain enough, revealing little, but it seems to be pony size-- several feet too short for you to just walk inside. You duck, scampering through. Trixie saunters behind you, shutting the door, and she heads over to your right with a sleek smile over her face.

The insides of the house seem just as picturesque as the outside. You eyes bounce around from mostly empty bookshelves to the smooth wooden-planked floor to the paintings of cats and dogs along the walls to the small circular end tables and all in between. Everything has a reddish-brown sheen over it. Trixie makes a soft little noise from a few feet up ahead, and you make your way to another room. The door has a carved image of a bed across the top. Must be the bedroom, no duh.

"Assistant," she moans. You open up the door and duck across. You shoot back up and accidentally whomp your head on the ceiling, growling. You blink. You can hardly believe what you see when you open your eyes.

Trixie poises herself upon a gigantic grey bed. Her legs rub along against each other with a tiny, lacy pillow squished in between them. Her tail has curled around in a little bundle-like shape going over her belly and around the area in between her legs. Her mane has fluttered along her side, with her front hooves buried inside them. Her face, looking so seductive and beautiful with her eyelashes flickering, makes your heart start to race. What drives you crazy most of all is that somehow she looks wet, her sleek mane seems even sleeker with the moisture dripping off of her onto the sheets.

"Trix-ie," you mutter. You can hardly think, your insides screaming at you both that she's some kind of alien horse and that she's the hottest cartoon-like thing you've seen since Jessica Rabbit. A tent forms in your shorts.

"My dear, dear assistant," she coos, rubbing her hooves against her body in a way that almost makes your mouth water, "Trixie apologizes that Trixie did not initiate you into our partnership the way that your race does things."

"Yeah, our race always says 'hello' with sex. Let's go with that," you murmur.

"So," she says, body leaning up and horn glowing, "I'm here for you. The Great and Powerful Trixie..." She licks her lips. "The Soft and Seductive Trixie." You don't even make a conscious decision, you just find your hands naturally shoving your shorts down your legs. "The Beautiful and Talented Trixie." Your briefs follow, and you kick them across the ground. Your socks and shoes seem to almost knock themselves off.

"The... dead sexy Trixie..." you whisper, hands crawling forward upon the sheets. You amble forwards, eyes feasting all over the unicorn's wonderful body. Your hands reach out and clash against the sides of her belly. She feels warm and almost achingly soft. You move your hands along up to her chest. The contrast of your skin against her brilliant blue fur already sends tingles of pleasure through you.

Trixie giggles, loving the touch as much as you do. You feel a throbbing in between your legs, knowing that you need to start soon. But you want to savor this moment, doing things to get every last bit of bliss from her. This might be a dream, this might be a fantasy, this might be anything... yet you'll make it count.

Your legs meet against hers. She shifts, her tail flowing across your skin. You feel the wetness in between her own legs, and you know magic will happen pretty soon. Her wet tail feels so unbelievably good, the silky touches like thousands of little kisses. You lean down and bury your face in her chest, your hands moving up from her shoulders into her mane. Her wet mane feels even better, and your fingers seem to never want to leave from the back of her head.

"You know what to do, right?" she quietly asks, hooves touching you so delicately.

"Kind of," you whisper, suddenly pausing. "I... uh... haven't..." You feel pretty embarrassed to even think about finishing that sentence.

"Well, then," she replies, a smile curling up along her adorable cheeks and her hooves rubbing a little pattern against your back, "for my next trick, the Great and Powerful Trixie will make your virginity--" She stops, leaning back and dramatically waving her hooves in the air. "Disappear!"

Trixie kisses along your cheek. She has some kind of soft, angelic kind of scent. You return the favor, layering kisses upon her chest and up her neck. You close your eyes and take a deep breath. As you open them again, you find yourself gazing eye to eye with Trixie. Her eyes might as well be canyons. You savor those deep, sparkly colors, finding yourself almost lost, as you nudge forward.

Your lips meet hers. A burst of ecstasy goes through your head. You don't really know what to do, but Trixie has her mind on the prize and she wants you. her tongue rubs up along your teeth, lips locking tightly. You push forwards, wanting to taste her as well. You feel her hooves making little circles upon your chest, legs teasing against yours. Trixie moans, every sound bringing you such joy.

You've perched your manhood up against her belly, and you can already feel some sticky pre-cum dripping down onto her pretty blue fur. She breaks the kiss, tilting her head. She kisses you again just a moment later, almost biting the sides of your lips. Her hooves wrap around your head as you put your hands around hers. Kiss melts into kiss, heads sliding and coos of pleasure from both of you. Her mane has buried all along the sides of your face, rubbing up against your cheeks. The cotton-candy feelings seem just so wonderful.

You find yourself sitting up, bodies embraced perfectly as you make out. You just want to pull her against yourself and never, ever let go. She breaks a kiss to poise herself a little bit backward. You gaze at her beautiful face. Her horn lights up, and you see her picking up her hat. She nudges it atop your own head as she smirks. You guess that the moment has finally arrived, your manhood buried against her belly.

She slides a few inches upwards, hooves resting upon your shoulder. She's sitting right over your lap, your face now nestled inside her chest with her mane along your shoulders. Your eyes run down her body over to the area between her legs, even wetter than the rest of her. You focus on her pretty looking slit, pink curls sticking out midst her blue fur.

"Trixie," you moan. You can hardly talk anymore. She lets out a feminine moan, and you feel the tip of your manhood rubbing up into her slit. She's already dripping down the shaft.

"You," she whispers back, pressing herself bit by bit deeper. You can't believe the pleasure already shooting through your body. Finally, you can't take another second of teasing. You clench your hands against Trixie's sides, thrusting her down.

She presses down, hooves knocking your shoulders as well. You see your manhood plunging right into her slit all the way to the base. Torrents of pure joy course through your sides, making you feel so unbelievably good. You grab her body even closer, the two of you enclosed like two petals in a massive flower.

She groans loudly, drool coming from the sides of her mouth. She wiggles side to slide, your thing pulsing inside of her body. She feels amazingly snug yet not too tight, and wetness just seeps all across your lap. You envelop your face against hers, kissing once again. She slides upwards, inch by glorious inch taking her marehood off of you. Her slick rubbing against your manhood is almost too much, jolts of pleasure popping across your mind.

She takes a slow breath, and she moves delicately back down. Bliss flowing along your body, you find yourself purring like a kitten. You'd feel embarrassed at sounding so feminine-- but you can't consciously think at all. She pumps a second time, taking it faster. The sensations of pure pleasure make you dig your hands into her back, your hips starting to move as well.

She thrusts herself harder, her body slanting from side to side. You can't get enough. You bring yourself upwards into her wet entrance with greater and greater speed, moans going like a metronome from both of you. You gaze at her face for the umpteenth time as the thrusts amp up. She's drooling all over your neck, her eyes looking wide as saucers.

Her satisfied face makes you curl your head upon her shoulder, feeling happier than you thought you could ever feel. Your mutual thrusts get more mechanical, more intense. You hear the "shlick, shlick, shlick" from between her legs, and you know that you can barely hold out much longer. She knows too, and she unleashes a torrent of quick thrusts.

You scream. She burst out with a guttural call, more like a she-wolf than a pony. Her bottom hooves kick against your legs as her mane smacks your side again and again. The tingly sensations build up over and over again, ecstasy seeming to boil your brains, and you can't stand it. She throws her head back and brings her head against yours, making one last, incredibly sloppy, slurpy kiss.

You fly right across the line. She nudges her slit right down to the base, and you twitch. A sea of moans flow through you as the pleasure amps up. You release yourself inside of her. Your mind floats up to heaven for what feels like a hundred years. A moment later, you feel your sticky stuff filling her up. She's already sliding up off of you, but your body can't seem to finish. Your mind floats lazily back down to earth like a leaf through the summer breeze, such amazing pleasure still overwhelming your senses.

You manage to shift you head down, looking back in between her legs. Sticky whiteness bubbles out of her pink slit, coating alongside her pretty blue fur. Your limp manhood slumps to the side, a little trickle sticking out the tip. You can here you both panting hard, hearts still racing. You imagine that you've emptied your balls out-- more intense than you could have dreamed. She coughs, her hooves rubbing up against her neck.

"I love you, Trixie," you murmur, face going back against her chest. You run it down over to her belly, your hands going up her thighs over to her soaked marehood. It all feels so incredibly good against your fingers. You feel ripples of joy moving across her body, and you snicker. Time for me to return the favor.

She lets out a group of little breaths as your fingers move through her slit. She's already felt super close, and she's about to lose it at any second. Your fingers curl up and start to wiggle in a tiny circle. You've apparently got the right moves, because she calls out in pleasure and paces her hooves against your shoulders. You feel some kind of weird magical blob of something dripping down on your head.

You look up, still working her slit, and you see her brightly lit horn oozing some kind of blue magical juice. You hesitate, wondering how the hell her weird pony anatomy has to work. You take a little breath. Your fingers expand, thrusting upwards into her marehood, just as your free hand reaches up and rubs your other fingers against her horn.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Trixie shouts, her body buckling over other to the side. You see something like blue lightening shooting across her limbs and her legs kicking-- her slit tightening against your fingers. You reflexively clutch her horn tightly, your palm nudging all along the base. Her mouth opens up wide into a big 'O' as her blue arua covers over across her entire body.

*Crack!*

You can hardly believe your eyes as Trixie fires some kind of magical lazer beam straight out of her horn-- burning through the window and shooting right out into the wilderness. Her body shivers uncontrollably, hooves smacking across your body. You pull your hands off of her. She wiggles in place atop the bed, totally dazed, before you leap a few feet ahead to keep her from falling. She's panting even harder than before, sweat pouring off of her head.

"I guess you just came..."

She closes her mouth for a second, nodding, before opening it out and panting once again. Her overwhelmed face looks amazingly pretty, and you cradle her head in your arms. She tries to smile. You just lean forward and kiss her on the cheek.

A few hours later...

You walk out of Ponyville, smiles on both your faces. Trixie's head nudges gently against your side with each step. The ponies all had shot dirty glances at you, and many of them simply shut themselves inside rather than be around such a strange creature, for their world anyways, as you. You hardly cared.

Twilight, for her part, shrugged her shoulders and knocked her head against her library door while moaning "Oh, praise Celestia, not again!" You thought that the remark was for Trixie, but apparently Twilight meant it about you. Apparently, such accidental transports across time and space are not as uncommon as one would think.

Twilight gave you an odd kind of doctor's examination-like procedure. She also introduced you to her five closest friends, apparently as "Trixie's assistant" each time. You had to keep correcting her to make it "Trixie's boyfriend", but you didn't mind that much. None of her friends registered much with you expect for the white unicorn girl, what's her name, that looked almost as cute as Trixie as well as the pink one, named Pie for some reason, who promised you the party of your life tomorrow morning.

The events seemed like a blur. You just couldn't wait to finish out the evening by heading back to Trixie's cabin. You're eyeing in the distance right now, content looks on Trixie's face as well as yours. Still, though, something about the house looks off. The lights from the inside seem to glow oddly brighter than usual.

Trixie notices it too. She motions at you to stay put as she trots to the door. You don't listen, heading just a few feet behind her.

"Hello?" she asks, nudging the door open.

"Squeal like a pig, weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" shouts an airy, British-accented voice from inside. You freeze. "What? I guess that's the best kind of 'backwoods' expression I can manage at the moment. Are you un-impressed?" Trixie and you step forward and suddenly find yourself standing in the middle of the living room, staring upon the oddest creature that you've ever seen.

This thing appears to be some kind of Frankenstein's monster-like creation with parts commbled from various other beasts. You can't stop from glaring at his from his dragon like neck and head with red purple purples in his sickly yellow eyes. He lets you both sit there until he raises his head back, a chicken-like claw going up in the air.

"Take a picture, goodness, it will last longer," he remarks, smirking.

"Hey, Trixie knows you..." she mutteres, a hoof against her cheek. "You're that... that... guy. With the thing. And the stone turning into stuff with other stuff... and things."

"And?" he interjects.

"Uh, never mind." Trixie seems to shrink.

"Oh, I suppose I should be sorry. I keep forgetting that you're from the first season only," the creature replies, shuffling in place and leaning against a bookshelf. "I must introduce myself. Discord is the name. Discord is my game."

"Okay," you mutter. Get out of our house, please.

"Now that those pleasantries are out of the way," Discord says, scratching his chest and then looking down at his claw. He takes a deep breath. "Why have you summoned me!" Fire seems to shoot out of his back, his head swelling up and his eyes blazing forward almost like little yellow daggers pointed over to.

Trixie and you jump backwards, shriveling. "S-s-summoned?" you both stammer.

"Gotcha!" Discord says, suddenly reverting back to normal. He shifts his head forwards and laughs, leaning up now against a whicker chair. "Oh, goodness, you should have seen the looks on your faces." He wipes a tear from his left eye. "Now, anyways--" He leaps to the side and takes a seat on the chair. "I must, seriously, thank you both for freeing me from my stone prison once again."

"Freeing you?" you and Trixie both reply.

"Oh, you're both speaking at hte same time," Discord mutters. "How adorable! And the fact that this is inter-racial makes your romance almost sitcom worthy. Imagine that." He gulps and goes to an announcers voice. "Coming soon to FOX Mondays: Love is Blue, a kinky mash-up comedy starring Pauly Shore as the viewer self-insert."

How the hell does he know these things? You take a deep breath. Trixie simply nudges her body along your side.

"Back to business," Discord says, waving a weird paw in the air, "I was merely standing there in my stony prison, dreaming about how I'd toyed with Picard that one time Wesley went ahead and..." He stops, seeing your blank faces. "Eh... right. Suddenly, I had a bluish beam of pure magical energy shoot into me. I felt all tingly and warm inside. Then, I came right back to life."

Bluish beam, eh? You start feeling a little woozy. Trixie locks eyes with you, understanding.

"Rather than mess with Celestia some more, I decided to hurry myself over here to find out where said magical source had come from," Discord went on. "Of course, I had some fun on the way. But, here I am."

"Trixie is, uh, happy to see you here."

"Really?" He stands back up. "I'd think that you'd be terrified, with my reputation." His cheerful face narrows, his smile fading. "Now, seriously, tell me what on earth it was that actually freed me."

"It sounds really impossible, really contrived. But I know what happened, I think. Trixie here," you begin. You can't even imagine how to explain things. "She... she..." Discord hangs on your every word, looking geniunely curious. "She came." You spit those words out.

Discord sticks his lips out, head jiggling. He closes his eyes and bursts out with a torrent of laughs. You feel a little angry, but you don't even know what to think of this weird creature that imagines himself a supervillan. Trixie just seems to want to die.

"Oh, my dear, my dear human... my dear pony..." He snorts, trying to not laugh himself silly. "That's delightful. I mean it, no sarcasm, from the bottom of my heart. I've heard about unicorns experiencing odd powers, exponential strength at the moment of hottest heat." He lays about on the chair, head leaning down and legs popped straight up. "It is indeed contrived, that such a magical beam could shoot from this cabin all the way through valleys and rivers up to my stone, although that's not your fault. That's the lazy fanfiction writer's fault."

"Fanfiction?"

"Look, I'll be honest with you over what I want now." Discord said, jiggling his legs up and smacking the ceiling with them. "I've been out for a while. You know about prison? It's worse than prison. I need relief. I need release."

Trixie doesn't like the sound of those two words, but you feel more agnostic. You scratch the back of your head, trying to read Discord's perky, sunny expression. He seems legit.

"What's your game, fiend?" Trixie sputters.

"Threesome."

"No..." Trixie squeaks.

"Yes..." you mutter without thinking.

"Two against one, you're ours, Miss Great and Powerful Cum Dumpster!" Discord says, grabbing the two of you with his claw and paw. He drags you both to the bedroom and tosses you both on the bed.

"But I..." Trixie begins. You see some kind of mixed expression on her face. Discord cuddles up in the bed along the other side of her. You match eyes with the creature. His claw is now moving along Trixie's shoulder down to her belly.

"You know, Trixie," he moans, "I have a lot of special powers. Powers that often come in handy, as you'll see. Or, I should say, as you'll taste." You see Discord amble a foot or so over. His long, thick dragonhood sticks up in the air, throbbing. You see something dripping and red pooling at the tip.

Blood? He sees you eyeing it as well, and he simply nods. You find yourself reaching over and touching a bit of his pre-cum iwth your fingers. Not gay. Not gay. Not gay. This is not gay. I just am curious. I'm not going to taste it or anything. The tingly, bubbly sensation feels famiar. "It's.. it's..." you whisper.

"Hawaiian Punch!" Discord calls out, playfully slapping you on the shoulder. "Try it!" You don't know if he's tricking you somehow, but you reflectively lick your fingers. You feel that sugary punch taste you'd get from a fountain drinks machine. You watch Discord whispering some things into Trixie's ear. She swoons, turning her belly over to him. She lays kisses upon his chest and trails sloppy slurps downward, eyes on his throbbing dragonhood. Discord looks over at you. "I'm using a little magic on her. You, I trust, are already game for everything. Not that magic works on you anyway."

You nod as you perch your body over behind Trixie, head going into her mane. "I am.. never going back to earth again," you declare, and you close your eyes, fingers traveling up Trixie's thighs. You hear her slurp across the tip of Discord's rod, and that just makes your own thing between your legs get jealous. Your pants and briefs shimmy down your legs, fingers now rubbing a zig-zag on her moist marehood.

Sharing Trixie with Discord? Best. Life. Ever. You don't want to find heaven anymore, find happiness anymore. You're already there.

The End