Author's Note
I took some painkillers...now this happened.
The Lengths We Go To
I stood on the doorstep to my home, yet another dull winter day passing by with an uneventful dinner with some high up nobility. I despised them, I hated them all. They were cowards, fit to live in their closed off little world and be blissfully ignorant of the world outside Canterlot. Not like Fancy, not like me, we tried to step past it, to see beyond the paper thin veil that these primp and proper ponies lived in.
These ponies liked to think they ruled the world, that things like Diamond Dogs, Changelings, Dragons and the like were a far off problem. Even after the attack they just hushed it up and went about with daily life. Not a care in the world, blissfully ignorant of the growing issue across Equestria. No idea about the chaos god nearly destroying the town to the south, of the rising group of heroines below, dumb.
They were dumb, but it was ignorance and stupidity born of denial. Nothing could be done, not yet. I could only move on, get out of the cold and try to survive another day. Another grey day waiting after my dreamless rest, another hour spent nodding daftly and pretending to take interest in the affairs of nobles from other nations and petty problems. Fashion was the biggest issue now, and the animosity between those that could afford something stylish and those who couldn't was growing every day.
But as I said, I needed to get out of the cold, and with a few quick steps I saw myself inside. My home was by no means small, but it still carried a cozy warmth, capable of biting back the cold in mere seconds. I took off my scarf, trying it around a coat tree and looking around, "Fancy?!" I yelped, sounding more needy than I wanted to, "Fancy get in here now."
As if on cue my husband wandered in, carrying himself rather strongly. I glared at him, looking him up and down and biting my lip, "You look like trash...you know that?" I shoved him, shifting my weight to my shoulder, "Garbage."
Fancy just stood there, smiling like always, his mustache proud as ever. "Like utter shit!" I screamed, using my magic to grab a lamp and clock him with it, a fit of rage growing in my chest. A faint green glimmer came from behind the lamp, quickly replaced by Fancy standing proud as ever, smiling just like always. I hated the way he looked at me, it was condescending.
I looked at the half shattered lamp in my magical grip, letting it fall to the ground in a heap of broken ceramic, "Tacky Saddle Arabian crap...." I muttered, turning from Fancy and walking into the center of the room, "Fancy...come here," I commanded, finding him standing beside me in a second. I wrapped my foreleg around him, pulling him cheek to cheek with me. His skin was cold, horribly so.
I hated it, he'd been like this for months, and even though I knew why it didn't make it any easier. I rubbed his neck, searching for that warmth he once had. But hugging him felt hollow, wrong, inequstrian. "Monster," I muttered, "cold blooded monster!" I screamed, throwing him off and trotting to the stairs, "You never tell me you love me! You never talk to me, you just stare at me and smile!" I carried a livid fury in my voice, born of scorn and inattentiveness, "Scream back damn you!" I shouted, looking over to a table by the stairs and finding a pair of scissors.
I took the scissors, turning to Fancy with righteous indignation, "Talk to me damn you!"
Fancy just stood there, smiling as I held the scissors to his throat. Only for a single moment did his smile falter, snapping right back to his usual smile. I wanted to kill him, I wanted to wipe that smug grin out of existence, it needed to die. I nicked his throat with the scissors, tossing them down onto the clean marble floor and looking to the window, "Scream at me...make a noise, anything...." I sounded broken, tired, like trying was difficult.
I stared out into the snow covered streets of Canterlot, pursing my lips and wetting them. I wanted to scream. I wanted to headbutt the window, just to make something happen, to fill the air with some sort of noise besides the endless click clack of hooves on wood and stone. The silence was horrifying, far more worrying than anything else. It was endless, broken by monotonous cackle and click clack.
And out of the blue, a dripping. It grew closer and closer, louder and louder. A hoof touched my side, a cold hoof. I slowly turned around, spotting Fancy dripping green bile from his cut. I glared at him, turning away with a huff, "Bug...disgusting freak."
I turned around in a flash, wrapping my hooves around Fancy and hanging off his neck, "I'm sorry...." I buried my face into his neck, trying to conjure up the same warmth he once carried, "Please...don't leave again, never again."
Fancy said nothing, not bothering to return the hug. He just stood there, cut healing under a green glow. I hated that color, I hated it more than anything else. I threw myself free, glaring at him as he smiled his condescending smile. I wished I could kill him, I wished I could get red of the creature that wore his face, that stood like him, dressed like him, became him at a moments notice. But I needed him, I needed that creature more than it needed me.
I walked up to him, pressing my forehead against his shoulder, "I hope you choke on it...you Celestia dammed monster." I turned my head against him, crying into his neck, "...Why'd you take him away from me? Replacing him doesn't make it right you know...." I took a deeply shaken breath, "If they found out you were here they'd kill you, hang out in the street, make an example out of you!" I screamed, stomping my hoof, my words practiced from time and time again of anger.
Fancy just stood there, staring down at me with a green glimmer in his pupils. I knew what he was trying to do, but no amount of magic could force the hatred I had for his kind away. This thing could take his form, move like him, look like him, act like him, but I'd never hear his voice again, I'd never feel the warm embrace, never feel his breath against my crown as he held me close.
All I had left was this mechanical thing, this creature that only knew two things, pain and love. And each and every day of my life I gave it more and more of both. And no matter how harsh my spite grew, no matter the destroyed things that littered my ruined apartment, none of it could rid me of him. Because as much as I wanted to leave, to run and scream bloody murder, I needed him.
I wasn't ready to lose him, not yet, maybe not ever. Maybe when I have nothing left, maybe when all my friends leave me, maybe in days or months or maybe even years, I could find the strength to let go. But right now I needed his smile, I needed to remember his face.
"I hate you..." I muttered, pressing my cheek against his smooth plated neck, "You monster, you creature of Tartarus.... Now please...tell me you love me...please?"
