Am I just an outsider

by fluttercord4ever

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sad, Original Character, Cheerilee, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1760

Miss Cheerilee had our class write a song about anything we want.

Most of my life I just felt like an outcast or an outsider. I felt like no one loved me.

I am a victim of bullying.

Published 2014-07-15 02:10:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-15 02:10:03 UTC

At home

At home

When I got home my mom and dad are still at work. My mother works at the mental hospital and my dad is working on houses. I walk to the kitchen to made myself a dandelion sandwich. Once that I took my sandwich and walk over to desk in the living room. Taking a bit of my sandwich and thought about what should my song be on. I could write a song about nature, but that is to plain and simple. A love song, no my classmates would laugh at me. I was already finish with my sandwich now, and I still have nothing to write about. Frustrated I went to my room and lay on my bed. I start to look around my room to find something to inspire me. It was not long until something cause my eye. A picture I draw in art class. It was a picture of a young filly she had no cutie mark yet but she was covered in cuts and on the top of the piece of paper it said

"Help me."

"I remember drawing this. This was when the bulling at school got every bad."

Then it hit me like a brick hit the back of my head. Quickly I grab a peace of paper and I start to write.

Project due

It was time to sing our songs to the class. Someponies sing about their cutie mark, some sing about family, some nature. They were all really good and some have amazing voices.

"That was very nice Sunny."

Miss Cheerilee said looking over with a smile on her face.

"Now Sweetheart it is your turn."

The sound of my name just gives me goose bumps. Slowly I grab my paper with my lyrics of my song and walk out to the front to the class. I can feel my legs heat up. I look around to see my classmates looking at me wanting for me to sing.

"Sweetheart you can just read it. You don't have to sing it. I will not take off points."

Miss Cheerilee said in her calm voice. I shook my head and said

"No Miss Cheerilee I am fine."

I took a deep breath and start to sing my song.

The Project

"Ok class before we leave today. We have a project."

Miss Cheerilee said walking to the front of the class with a smile on her face.

"What is the project about Miss Cheerilee?"

One of my classmates said. I can feel him looking at me. I tried not to look and keep my eyes front, but I look at the corner of my eye to see a creepy smile on his face. I quickly turn back to the front of the room where Miss Cheerilee stood.

"The project is to write a song about anything you want and sing it to the class. The project is do tomorrow."

Some of my classmates were happy and some of them groaning and not wanting to do it. With me I don't mine writing a song or the project itself. It's just I am afraid what my classmates would say about my voice and my speech. They just don't understand that I wear hearing aids. I can't just magically make my not deaf.

"Sweetheart class is over."

I look up to see Miss Cheerilee at the front of my deck. I look around to see none of my classmates are in the room.

"Sorry Miss Cheerilee. I was thinking about the project."

Miss Cheerilee smile and put a hoof on my shoulder.

"You don't have to sing it, if you want Sweetheart. You can just read it."

"It's ok Miss Cheerilee. I can handle it."

"Ok. I'll see you tomorrow then."

I nod at Miss Cheerilee and walk out of the school.

Author's Note

The reason why I called my OC 'Sweetheart' is because everyone calls me that. So my OC is 'Sweetheart'.

Am i just am outsider

I walked past you
And you never even looked back.
To see the scars on my skin.
The words that you say
puts one more scar on my skin.
No one could see the tears be hide my mask.
No one could see be hide my smile.

Am I just an outsider
Am I just an outcast
Just a piece of trash
Blowing in the wind.
Am I just an outsider to you
Am I just an outcast to you.
Does my words mean nothing to you
Does my voice mean nothing to you.

The words you say..
Just brings my down one notch.
The words you say
Just brings my more insane
The words you say
Just makes it sound true
The words you say
Just makes it sound right.

Am I just an outsider
Am I just an outcast
Just a piece of trash
Blowing in the wind.
Am I just an outsider to you
Am I just an outcast to you.
Does my words mean nothing to you
Does my voice mean nothing to you.

All my life
All my life
I just wanted more
I just wanted more
I just wanted to be free
Just to be free
From the mayhem that I am in
From the words that you said.
But now I know the words you said
Are not true!

It is time to take off this mask!
It is time to stand up for me!
It is time to speak my words!
It is time to say who I am!

I am not an outsider
I am not an outcast
I am me
and no one can change
who I am!
I am not an outsider
I am not an outcast
I am me
and no one can change
who I am!

I am not a puppet
I am not a doll
that you can control
I am not an outsider
I am not an outcast
I am me
and you can not change me!
I am not your puppet anymore
I am not your doll anymore
I am me
and only me!

So say your words
I am not listening
Anymore!
No more scars for me!
No more tears for me!
No more of your words
No more of your lies!
Just smiles
Just smiles
For me!

I am not your puppet anymore
I am not you doll anymore
I am me
and you can not change
Who I am!

I was never an outsider in the first place
I was never an outcast in the first place
I was just stupid
To believe in your words.
To listen to your lies!
Now I am free
I am free from your words
I am free from this mayhem
that I was in!

I am not you puppet anymore
I am not you doll anymore
You can not control me
You can not destroy me
I am a free girl now
I am a free person now
I know my preface now
And it's all thanks to you

I am not an outsider
I am not an outcast
Anymore.

My words

My words

These are my words as fluttercord4ever not Sweetheart, not a made up story but my own words.

When I was being bulled I felt so lost.My bullies made fun of my voice and that I wear hearing aids. Yes I wear hearing aids which is why I am troubles spelling and reading. On took of that I was bullying myself. Saying mad things to me.It was so bad I wanted to cut myself or even commit suicide.

Most of it was because I depress because I am a twin less twin.
My Twin died 10 days after we were born.So I never got to meet her.
Her name was Sadie.
How she died was that she got very sick and she died.I almost died the day after she died, but here I am talking to you.

I am not going to say what I said to myself. It's too much for me to handle saying in words.The bullying lasted 2 years in middle school, but I was bullied in grade school too.Well it wasn't really bullying it just the kids didn't understand that i wear hearing aids.They thought that I heard them but I really didn't.I was sent to the office a lot because I couldn't control my angry. But how could I, it just went on and on. I didn't know what to do. I didn't understand anything. I got my hearing aids when I was 5. So that's 5 years without hearing anything.
I was the only kid in the school from grade school-middle school. It wasn't until high school when there are kids that where hearing aids.
For all my live I felt like I was nothing
an outsider
an outcast
but now I felt free. No more running away from things, No more hiding.

I am going to help Ponies/People with their problems.
If it wasn't for what I went though that I found out who I am and want to do in life.
God had a preface in my life and he does for you too.
I don't care if you believe in God or not, just listen to me
Let my words be the light at the end of your tunnel
Let my words be the spark of your world
Let my words heal your cuts and scars.
Let my words help you find her any though your darkness hour.

Now i am going to said something to you.
What are you going to do?
What is your preface in life?
What are you doing to do to change the world?
I am not saying to clean up the world or help the poor.
Even though they are good things to do.
But
What are you going to do that will make people see what you see.
Like what i am doing now.
That feeling in your heart that makes you make to do something more in your life.
That feeling in your soul crying out to you to make a difference in the world.
What are you going to say?
What are your words?

I am fluttercord4ever and I am a victim of bullying
I have a preface in my life and that is to help people find their light from their tunnel and to have them see a new world.
I want them to make a difference in the world, just like what I am going with my words.

Thank you for listening/reading.