The T.O.U.S.O Project

by Septimus_Golem

Rating: everyone
Tags: Alternate Universe, Romance, Adventure, Human
Length: 3543

When Solomon (a human) is sent through a portal to Ponyville as part of his job, he doesn't know what to expect. Grand adventures ensue, set in an AU where pony kind and human kind have open borders and many can freely travel between the two wor

When Solomon (a human) is sent through a portal to Ponyville as part of his job, he doesn't know what to expect. What he finds on the other side is a world he has only heard of, seen over television broadcasts, or from talking to clients who travel to Equestria on a day to day basis. Ponies and Humans are working together, forming one large society, split between worlds. They rely on each other, and many choose to live permanently on one side or the other. See for yourself what kind of adventures one man can get into when he shifts his entire life, facing new opportunities in a world of magic, friendship, and love.
“The biggest challenge of my life was about to occur, I would be literally moving to a world I've never been in. Moving to Equestria and learning about their society was something new. This golden opportunity was going to change everything…”

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-14 20:10:02 UTC

1: New Job, New Life

0: A Brief History Lesson

From The Journals of Soul Omen, Prince of Fantasima

I remember the time, seven years ago, when our world nearly fell apart. Great cosmic waves hit the planet, creating destruction in most cities. The energy revitalized our dying sun, showing brightness no one had seen in hundreds of years. Then the worst came, earthquakes that ripped entire continents in half. The leftover cosmic energy rippled into the earth, creating fresh, abundant land. But the biggest difference was the materials they found. Those materials advanced the scientific world far beyond what it was, allowing the creation of machines that literally rip holes in the fabric of space, creating portals. So far, all of the discovered worlds were empty, and used as places such as waste lands.

But one was finally found, and a link established with the native species… which just so happened to be the equivalent of an old-earth pony. With magic tattoos. Now, up to that day , this was all kept a nice and quiet government secret of the Human Republic, and our company, Apparition Inc. I got to know this because, being the mechanic of a dimensional hole maker, I have access almost anywhere in the facility. But mostly to the room where the hole is made. I knew that both parties planned to take it a step further. Mingle the two worlds, but keep them separate. And so the TOUSO-PROJ (Transmutation of Organics into Universal-Specific Organisms) was born, and was completed within a year thanks to the combined efforts of science and, well, magic from our new friends. And now, after three years of Apparition working for the government, I am offered a trip through the TOUSO, to oversee the creation of the new TOUSO in Ponyville. I don’t really know what to say. The business has been offered publicly to both sides for about a year now, and seems fine. Many people moved over, it only costs a one-time payment, about a few hundred for creation of a body, and the maintenance and travel itself is free.

Our societies have intertwined very nicely, melding into two countries with open

borders and Universal Exchange. You can buy and sell land in Equestria, invest and other things. We also brought science to the pony race, and they gave us very mysterious magic that is hard to work with.

That roughly brings us to today, the day I go through the machine I’ve maintained since before day one, when my grandparents and parents were hired to build the damn thing. Took a genius to maintain, what with the Carpal Synchronizers and Denzel's Fabric Modifiers, it gets complicated. The biggest challenge of my life was about to occur, I would be literally moving to a world I’ve never been in. This golden opportunity was going to change everything...

0: A Brief History Lesson

1: New Job, New Life

“Just leave him, he’s a goldfish. You can always get another one”, said the scratchy voice of my friend. “Seriously Solomon, you can’t take a fish to Equestria with you. Besides, will it even work? I’ve heard rumours that other animals can be turned into ponies there.”

“Well, fine. But you need to feed him every day, alright?” I sighed, it was hard, leaving your entire life in one world, and moving to another one for at least five years. “I’m off, I guess this is goodbye for awhile. And you’re sure that’s what they say? I mean, you’re only up in security. I’m down here on main floor, doing all the physics stuff. It’s hard being the Head Mechanic”

I stick my tongue out at the monitor, slinging my bag over my shoulder. “Alright, let’s do this.” I take my first step towards my new life in the small town of… Ponyville.

Making my way to the marked visiting room via the Employee hallways takes only a few minutes. My transmutation is scheduled before the rush of transmuters who go through on Visas, for education or work, in either world. There are fifty chambers, each one with a staff of three, one Guard, one Techy, and one Nurse. They quickly set me up, the machine is already up and running. I look at the techy, and run a few checks by him.

“Check the coolants in the systems?”

“Yes”

“Check the calibrations, are they within a pictometre?”

“Yeah they are. Stop worrying boss. Hundreds of people use TOUSO everyday, you practically built half of it with your family. You’ll do fine. We’re going to start the process, okay?”

Beeps and whirls come from the machine next to me, as needles inject painlessly into the back of my skull to begin the mental absorption. This specialty was created using a whole bunch of magic, the materials we sent through allowed unicorns to charm it, giving us the ability to absorb thoughts, feelings, emotion and place it into another brain, one in another world. The steps towards Transmutation include the Dematerialization of the brain into magic goop (official name: Smooze), Analysis of said goop, and the Transportation of the goop through the portal where it is then reconstructed into your brain and placed in a fresh body.

“DEMATERIALIZATION COMMENCING” says the machine. Legend has it that no one has ever heard past Analysis, which is true, in my few years of time. Really, dematerialization of the brain into a puddle is what-

~~ZZZT~~

TOUSO PROJECT ONLINE... Loading First-Time Setup.

Please Wait...

Done!

WARNING! ID CHIP HAS INTENTIONALLY CORRUPTED SOME DATA!

CONTINUING PROCESS

Sex: Male/Stallion

Age: 21/Adult

Height: 5’ 11’’/UNKNOWN

Weight: 210 lbs/UNKNOWN

Name: Solomon [REDACTED]

ERROR!! Name not suitable for Equestria...

Pony-Name will be generated by E-TOUSO

Pinging E-TOUSO

Ping Sent!

...

...

Equestria-TOUSO Connection Established...

Sending Response...

...

ResponseReceived!

Sending Smooze#234680 to E-TOUSO

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Smooze#234680 received, Thank you FP-TOUSO

Preparing Body for Long-Term Cryo

Disconnecting: Fourth Planet: TOUSO-PROJ

Name Generation Commencing...

Creating new Body...

ERROR!!

Body Generated is FORM: [REDACTED BY RECORDS]

Continue with TOUSO-PROJECT?

Cross-User Input: YES

Body registered under #234680

Generating Body Characteristics...

Tapping Magic Core...

Plugging Magic into Body#234680...

ERROR! STANDARD INHIBITORS ARE NOT AT HIGH ENOUGH LEVEL TO BLOCK MAGIC ACCESS! REPORT TO MASTER PROCESSOR?

Cross-User Input: -------

Cross-User Input: -------

Cross-User Input: -------

Cross-User Input: [REDACTED BY USER[/b]]****

*Continuing Process...*

*Plugging Mind#234680 Into Body#234680...*

*...*

*Welcome to Equestria...*

Sweet Mother of Jesus, her name was Mary. What a rush, and my head is killing me. A voice drifted over, fading in and out, before becoming clearer.

“Woah, I’ve never seen one come out like that yet…Well, get on out here. You can hear me, right? We need to perform some preliminary tests before we can release you, and we have a tight schedule,” the mysterious female voice rose from somewhere in front of me.

“Alright, stop shining that light in my eyes, then,” I grunted, feeling groggy, with a headache caused by the bright light. It seemed to be right in front of my face, too.

“That’s not me, sir. Now please, step out of the machine.”

Doing so, I noticed several things at first. Walking was impossibly hard, it felt like I my knees were backwards, and my neck already had a kink from bending down. Alas, Pony-kind isn’t built anywhere near a human, but hey, many others endured this, to the point of keeping their pony body. But as I exited the pod, I did also notice the bright light fading as fast as I could think, as I thought about it going down, it did! Thanks for that, guys. I’m putting that in the ‘What we did good’ section.

“So, your name that came up from Equestria:TOUSO was… uh huh. That’s ominous. Your new name here is Soul Omen, probably derived from your human name, no doubt. Might want to see a fortune teller. Cutie marks of all humans is a hand… except for you. Add that to the list of weirdness. They pulled out all the stops for you, huh. All hush hush, too.” said the woman (sorry, mare) in front of me. She stopped; peering at my backside before continuing. “Definitely not the standard hand that humans receive. Some kinda circle. Special you, but I think that won’t help you blend much. Your IDTag has already been placed via the machine, and your Universal account is accessible via most terminals. Keep in mind that only the large cities have terminals, and lines can get long.”

“Excuse me, but what did I come out as?” I blurt. “I honestly can’t really tell, but I feel kinda… tall.” Yeah, tall was definitely a word. That feeling of being larger than what you should be, which was only added by how short the mare in front of me was.

“Sigh. Well, if you need to know… you’re…? Hey, where did they go? Tony, did you see that? His wings disappeared!”

 A stallion (sigh) from behind me piped up, “I didn't see any wings, ma'am. But his hair sure did turn flat. It was all wavy before, like them Princesses you keep talking about.”

Great, I think I know what happened. I could feel a small itch along my shoulders anyway, and now I realised the feel of something on my head…

“Well buck me, we got ourselves a disguising alicorn! What are you, a prince from over there? A lord, duke? Any kind of royalty?” the mare asked me from her spot, walking closer. “You’re only a little taller than any other pony, but humour me, and try to think of a small light, coming from that horn you have there. This’ll tell us if you have a working horn. Any other unicorn from outa here doesn't, and no pegasi can fly, neither.

“Well, I'm just an engineer from over there. I’m guessing I’m an alicorn, right? Aren’t they the super-race of pony kind?” I tried to make light talk as I thought about a small, pulsing light from the tip of… well my horn, I guess. Light suddenly burst into the rom, blinding everybody...err, everypony. “WOAH! It does that so strong! I shouldn’t use that until I can control it.”

“Yeah, go see the Princess Twilight. She’s in Ponyville, the town your Home is at. We knew you were coming, so we looked through the profile. Nice to meet you, Soul. Now grab your bits, and head out the door. Find the Carousel Boutique, thats your Home. Good luck, and don’t tell a soul ‘cept the Princess that you’re Alicorn. We can keep hush-hush here.” said the guy, Tony, from behind me.

“Thanks, but, where is Ponyville?” I asked politely. He sighed, and pointed towards the giant exit sign. On my way, then.

The level of technology had me going crazy. I never knew what life without CompuPads was like, I had grown up with them and they were the first thing I disassembled. But here in Equestria it was so… rustic. And this wasn’t even the country yet! Getting on the train, I sat next to a group of five mares, chatting as they sat down.

“That was awesome! I can’t believe we got to see the wonderbolts Old-Time show, these new inventions like movies are off the hook!” said one blue pegasus.

An orange one next to her replied, “Well, Rainbow, ah don't think you’ll get much opportunity to see ‘em too often. Those thing are mighty popular right now.”

“It was thanks to Rarity that we got to go in the first place. Thank you, Rarity” a timid voice came from the yellow pony. From the way the white one tilted her head, she must have been Rarity.

“Oh dearie, that quite alright. I don’t mind paying for an evening of fun with my friends. My new lineup hits the market, with clothes designed to match either pony or human. It’s gathering quite a lot of popularity. And I have some other news, but I can’t tell you until it arrives.”

The rest I tuned out as I looked out the window, lost in thought. We approached Ponyville, and I got off. The five mares who were in the same car as me got off too, the blue one and yellow flying off with a few quick goodbyes. Feeling lost, I started to walk up to them, wanting to ask directions before a pink mass fell into my face.

“OOOOOOOOh! You’re NEW! I can feel it. Are you moving in? I bet you’re a human, right? But you have a real cutie mark. I bet you stole it! No, thats just wrong. I know! I bet all the cupcakes in the world that you’re here to help build the TOUSO line back to Canterlot, where you will stay at Rarity’s house, and eventually…” the mare stopped, a twinkle in her eyes. “OOh, so cute. My new favourite ship! RARITY! I FOUND YOUR HOUSE GUEST!” she yelled at the white pony, Rarity, who was two feet away.

“Wait, who are you?” I ask the pink one, who is still beside me. “Hey, answer me.” I say as I put my hoof on her. She suddenly shivers from nose to tail, looks at me in horror, and smacks my head; pretty hard, too. Down I go.

“Hey, I need some help over here! My Pinkie Sense just went off, BIG TIME! It was this guy!” she yells towards her two remaining friends.

“Wha?” I said, dazed and confused. Why was there three of her?

“You done spooked ‘im, Pinkie! I thought we told you t’not be doing that to anypony! And now look, he pretty much out cold. Good job”

“Applejack’s right. You seemed to have broke him, Pinkie,” said Rarity.

“I don't know… he spooked me, and I hit him! He’s a good guy, I Pinkie Promise!”

“If you’re so sure about this, lets bring him to Twilights house…”

I couldn’t make out what they were saying, and I only saw black after that...

For the second time today, I woke with a blinding headache. No dancing lights this time, but I couldn’t remember the last thing I did. Right, I still had to find Ponyville, and a Carousel Boutique. Opening my eyes, I saw six faces staring at me, which seemed vaguely familiar.

“Uhh... hi?” I said from my position on the floor, or couch, I don’t even know where I am right now.

“Who are you? And what are you doing in Ponyville?” said the purple unicorn, a little tiara on her head.

“Can I get a bit of space, please? Then I can answer whatever you throw at me.” The ponies took a few steps back, allowing me to get up. Giving a nice stretch, I somehow knocked a table over, when I didn’t even hit it. Well, not with my arms, anyways. I still felt; something hit that table.

“He did his weird magic again! Get him!” cried the blue pegasus, sweeping at me. Ducking under her resulting swoop, I bolted towards the door. A purple shield blocked the way, which I smacked into pretty hard. Ouch.

“No messing around, tell us what kind of magic you have!” the purple one yelled again. This time, from the different angle, I saw she had wings. She was an Alicorn, a princess.

“Wi-wings. Horn. You’re an Alicorn, right? You must be a princess. Which one are you?” I asked politely while giving a quick bow. “I’m sorry for any accidents. I’m pretty new to this… whole thing really. And I don't have magic, I’m human.” Better to add that tidbit in there.

“Well…” she seemed hesitant to answer. Everybody…..ugh. everypony else had a glowing gem around their neck, and the Princess’s crown glowed. “I’m Twilight Sparkle. Nice to meet you, I guess. What’s your name?”

“Well, they told me when I stepped out this morning it was… ohyeah, Soul Omen. So, uh, Soul works, I guess. I’m here as an embassy of FP-TOUSO, and your pink friend was...eerily correct before… I am here to work on the linkage between the Canterlot TOUSO centre and the small outpost they plan to build here.”

The princess seemed to think on it for a second, looking at her friends. Then she looked back to me, asking, “And how did you use magic while asleep? You hit us, more than once, and knocked over my table when you got up. Humans can’t use magic, it gets locked up in the creation process. That’s why they all have a hand for a cutie mark. Yours, on the other hand, is a Starswirl Loop Circle. I doubt a human can even define what a Starswirl Loop Circle is…” she trailed off, giving me an expectant look, somehow combined with a  glare.

Wow, hurt feelings much. Taking a glance in the mirror, which somehow I was in front of, showed me my butt, with a nice little swirl of colour. It was actually shimmering a little. Honestly, it looked like a black hole, because it seemed to adsorb the colour as it spiralled into the centre.

“Uuh, is a Starswirl Loop Circle a hole in the mesh of the universe, through which the possibility of time travel, inter-universal travel, and cross-universal hopping is theoretically possible? Back home we call them wormholes…” I had to stop, the look on her face was too funny. I smirked, and then laughed a bit. “Sorry to ruin your thunder, but the TOUSO creates a stabilized rip signature, opening one of these Starswirl Loops between our world and yours, and that is how we, that is, our species, met each other.”

She looked me dead in the eye, before covering my face in a purple glow and asking, “What are you? Nopony knows how our worlds are connected except the princesses and some poni- people in the Human-Equestrian Alliance,” giving me a stern look at the end of her sentence.

“Yeah, I told you. That's who I work for, I just got in this morning, the base was expecting me, did no one tell you? You are a princess, right?” I said

“No, I wasn't informed.” she replied curtly.

“Well, I was.” a voice from the corner said. The white pony looked up and said, “You ladies remember when I volunteered to help the integration process. Well, aside from donating a small monthly fee, I was also asked to provide a house for any ambassadors who would come over. They said that they would be different, but I never thought they would be, well, like him.” She made a gesture with her front hoof, while looking away.

“Rarity! Why didn't you tell us! Here we were, about to blast him for being some imposter, or just another mega villain to show up suddenly, and you say you knew he was coming?” the princess said, while walking up to Rarity. Various other cries of disappointment came from the others, but none were condescending or carried much threat. The Princess turned back to me.

“Okay, so I believe you. But how did you knock over that table?”

“And why did you keep hitting us when we carried you?” the rainbow pony called, from her spot hovering above the action.

“I… don’t know. I came out and they told me I was an Alicorn, which has never happened, and that I had a cutie mark. But within a minute, my wings disappeared… Hey! what are you doing?” Twilight had gotten very close to my side, and was staring at me with eyes wide.

“No, it’s impossible…” She put a hoof on my side, and instead of feeling it around my chest, I felt like I had arms coming from my back and she had touched them. Trippiest feeling ever.

“You do have wings. Rainbow, come here; do you see these? Thin, so thin that light goes through them. Will he ever fly?”

A few minutes of study go by. “No, these are too thin, nopony could fly with wings of paper. They don’t even look like they are made of bones, more like paper”

“Can I have some breathing room, please? It was nice meeting you and all, but if you’ve decided I’m not a threat, I’d like to go. Also, is there anywhere I can go and eat? I’m getting hungry.”

“Oh, dearie. You don’t need to waste your money. As your Home, you eat at my place with me and my sister. It’s all part of the package. Entirely funded by the HEA, and we both get a small sum of money each month. Mine will be going to charity, of course. I don’t actually need it, I make more than enough already.” Rarity said, while pulling Twilight and Rainbow Dash away from me. “Follow me to Carousel Boutique, your home away from home.”

It was a wonderful place. I had my own room, across the hall from Rarity’s and beside her sister’s, who I haven’t met yet. So far, it was shaping up to be a good trip, aside from the fact that Twilight wanted to test me for more magic ability and I only had one week before I started my actual job here. Overall, it looked to be like some kind of adventure, just waiting to happen.