Pinkie Pie Talks to Technicolor Ponies

by Super Trampoline

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Slice of Life
Length: 1587

Believe it or not, sometimes Ponyville has normal days. On those days, Pinkie talks to ponies. Because while she might know everypony in Ponyville, does she really know them on a personal level? No? That won't do. So she talks to ponies.

Believe it or not, sometimes Ponyville has normal days. On those days, Pinkie talks to ponies. Because while she might know everypony in Ponyville, does she really know them on a personal level? No? That won't do. So she talks to ponies.

A low key exploration of subtle world building through dialogue. Begins two weeks and three days after S1E1 and goes from there. Updates every even day of the month. I'll gladly take character or topic suggestions.

The boring mod-approved monochromatic version

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-17 01:24:44 UTC

Introduction: Carrot and Cup

"Huuarrghh. Morning, Cakes."

"Hello, Pinkie. You seem unusually tired for a non-party night."

"Huh, oh, post-party depression? Nopey, I think I just ate too much chocolate yesterday. Bon Bon was having a ridiculous sale, and I miiiiight have spent a teensy bit much. My blood-sugars probably through the roof, and I had all these weird dreams about--"

"Oh, I'm sure they were very weird alright."

"You don't want to hear them?"

"I think Cup is indeed saying that. No offense, Pinkie, I hope you understand, it's just that well, um..."

"Carrot slept with the lights on for three days the last time you told us about your dreams."

"Well, you did too, Honeybuns!"

"Carrot, we share the same bedroom. Anyway, Pinkie, you're shift doesn't start until eleven. Any plans before that?"

"Yeppers! I'm going to go talk to ponies!"

"Oh, well have fun. Be back by a quarter 'til eleven, okay?"

"Lokey pokey okey! You two have fun too--I want to have grandchildren!"

"I don't think she understands how family trees work."

"She's nineteen, dear. And given her, err, bubbly personality, I'm pretty sure she knows all about the birds and the bees."

"I don't know, she grew up on a rock farm."

"She'll be fine. Go turn on the oven please."

Twilight

"Hi, Twilight!"

"Oh, hi Pinkie Pie. How are you?"

"I was hoping to ask you the same thing. What's hopping?"

"Well, I'm just trotting to the market. Spike's under the weather, so that means I do the shopping."

"Oh cool! Whatcha buying? Oh wait, not cool! Spikey's sick? What got him down? Feather flu? Cutiepox? Dragon rash? Um..."

"None of those things, Pinkie. He's just got a small cold. Nothing too big, but I don't want him spreading it to anypony else."

"Okie Dokie Lokie! So Twilight, what's been on your mind lately?"

"Well, I finally got my last box of books unpacked and shelved last night. That feels pretty good. I think maybe  I'm even starting to feel at home here. I mean, I miss Canterlot, but here feels... fresh, you know?"

"That's great! Hard to believe It's only been.... carry the one, divide by zero, pineapple, zoom... two weeks, three days, three hours, and ninety seven seconds."

"Um, since what?"

"Since you arrived in Ponyville!"

"Pinkie, how could you possibly know the exact moment I got here?"

"Silly filly! I was the first pony you met, remember?"

"Huh. I guess that's true. Want to trot with me for a bit? I haven't really explored the market place too much yet; I bet there are a lot of hidden gems here you could show me."

"Hidden gems? That's more Rarity's thing. And nah, I actually have a birthday party to set up. I just wanted to check in on ya, see how things were going. But hey, nice chatting!"

"Well, that was random and pleasant I guess. Now, where can I find some onions?"

Applejack

"Hey Big Mackintosh! Where's your sis?"

"Older or younger?"

"The older one, duhhh!"

"Northwest Field."

"Thanks, Mac Attack!"

"Eeyup."

"Hiya, AJ!"

"Why, howdy, Sugarcube. What bring you round here?"

"Okay, okay, okay, okay! So so so--"

"Woah nelly! Simmer down there, partner."

"Right, sorry, I'm just so excited! Trottingham is have a pie festival in two weeks, and I want you to come along!"

"A pie festival? Me?"

"Yeah you, Apps! I know how much you like pies, and the Cakes are sending me to tend a booth, but I don't want to go alone and--"

"Sorry, Pinkie, but no."

"Huaahh! No?!?"

"Yeah. The farm needs me. I can't really afford to take a whole weekend off from work. Maybe in the winter when not much is happening, but right now, I'm afraid not. Besides, I've never cared much for travelin'."

"But... but! Don't you want to see the world? All you seem to do is apple-ey stuff."

"I don't have grand ambitions. It's hard work for sure, but I enjoy bucking apples. It's a family tradition, and I don't intend for that to change anytime soon."

"But... But there's so much out there! Don't you want to explore? Don't you want to, you know, have fun? You could find your special somepony out there! Get married, have foals, live! "

"Don't get me wrong Pinkie, I enjoy sightseeing as much as the next pony. I don't mind getting out and about from time to time; I reckon it rejuvenates ya. And sure, I'll wanna find a good reliable stallion to settle down with sooner than later, but I hope he likes farm life, because this mare's staying here. It's a wild world out there, and family is something everypony should be able to depend on. I feel mighty blessed to have mine."

"Huh. Wow. I'm going to have to think on this. Say, AJ, you have any trees I could borrow for a while?"

"Uhh, whatdoya mean by 'borrow'?"

"I mean sit it. I do some of my best thinking in trees you know."

"Uh huh. Um, Anywhere in the south field over yonder should be fine I reckon. Have fun, I guess. Oh, and Pinkie?"

"Yeah?"

"I hope you enjoy the festival. I know you will; you're always great at making friends. And hey, who knows, maybe you'll find somepony there who likes pie just as much as you do. You never know!"

"You're right, AJ. Thanks for the talk. Smell you later!"

"Applejack?"

"Yeah?"

"Why is Pinkie Pie in one of our apple trees?"

"Oh, she's just having one of her Pinkie moments, that's all."

"Sis, she's been out there for five hours."

"Has it really been that long? I should probably drag her in before a Timberwolf snatches her or something. 'S getting late."

"Eeyup."

Blossomforth

"Heya, Blossomforth!"

"Eek! Don't sneak on me like that... Pinkie Pie, is it?"

"Oh, sorry. I just wanted to ask you what's up."

"Um, not much. Why?"

"Well, I'm trying to get to know ponies better. Normally you're all loopedy-doopedy in the air. Whatcha doing down here?"

"Well, actually uh, my doctor wants me to stay on the ground for a few weeks. Getting over an upper respira--basically, I've been sick, and now I need to rest my lungs."

"Oooooh. That's too bad. That why you're always coughing?"

"Uh, yeah. How do you know I'm always coughing? You're kind of creeping me out."

"Oh, well your friend Cloud Kicker has a big mouth. Oops! Did I say that? I didn't mean to be rude! Oh no!"

"Pinkie, relax. Cloud Kicker does have a big mouth. It's fine."

"Oh, phew! But, um, if I creep you out, I, uh, guess I'll leave you alone."

"Nah, it's cool. In fact, I was just going to grab some lunch. Want to join me?"

"Do I? Sure!"

"How can a mare that skinny eat so many hayburgers?!"

Bon Bon

♫"Bon Bon! Bon Bonbon buuuhbonbon bon bon bon-bon Booonbonbonbon!"♪

"Hello, Pinkie Pie."

"Hey, Bonny, what's up? Why you sound down with a frown?"

"I'm fine, Pinkie, it's just I've told you before I'd rather you not turn my name into a rock song."

"Awww, but rock songs are fun. But you know what's even more fun? Respecting a friend's wishes!"

"I'm not sure I'd consider us frie--"

"Huuaagh! Not friends? Of course we are! I mean, we chat on a regular basis, and you're my--well, my employers, the Cakes--number one supplier of--what else?--bon bons! So... why aren't we friends?"

"Gee, I didn't mean to hurt you. I guess I just see us more as business associates, that's all. But you know what? Sure, you're my friend."

"I am? You know what this calls for?"

"A 'Bon Bon is my friend' party?"

"GASP! How'd you guess? Are you psychic? Please tell me you're psychic. That would be so cool!"

"What? No, that's more your thing. I just guessed based on the fact that--"

"Wait, wait wait wait. I'm Psychic? Woah! I didn't even know that. How do you know?"

"Well, I mean, you've got that weird thing you do with your tail that makes stuff fall."

"Oh, I don't make stuff fall, silly. It's the other way around. You're talking about Mr. Twitchy tail here. Yeah, I guess I am psychic. Huh."

"Heh. So, what can I do for you, Pinkie? You seem a bit more hyper today than you usually are."

"Actually, yeah I am. I'm going to be trying a new recipe this afternoon, and honestly, I'm pretty super nervouscited. Is it showing?"

"Yes, it's showing."

"Okay, less hyperness. But seriously, that's why I'm here. Bonny, you have any strawberry cheesecake taffy? Please say yes!"

"Ah. I think so. Let me go check."

"I hope she does."

"Sorry hun, I'm actually out."

"But--"

"You didn't let me finish. I still have plenty of strawberry taffy and cheesecake-flavored taffy. Think you could just mix those two together?"

"Hmmmmm. I don't know... Yeah, it should work. Can I have, uh, two pounds of each?"

"Sure thing Pinkie. Two pounds coming right up. That will be sixteen bits."

"Sixteen bits?! Holy guacamole, did your prices go up again?"

"Sorry. You know how much it costs to import this stuff from the southern Mareseposian Isles? That's where the very best saltwater taffy comes from!:

"Okie dokie, I trust you. Here's sixteen bits!"

"Great. Let me get you your fudge... Here you are."

"Thanks! Have a stupiferous day!"

"That mare sure does love her candy."