The Melancholy of a Teenage Coltby JamesBurtonChaptersRumble's Modern LifeChapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Rumble's Modern LifeWhat's good ya'll? The names Rumble and I just turned fifteen years old. I go to Ponyville high and I have no friends, but I don't give a fuck about friends. What? you don't like that I said the word fuck? Fuck you asswipe. Anyway my cutie mark is a thunder cloud because I make the skies rumble when I fly an shit. I always thought that my cutie mark would have something to do with making the fillies shake with pleasure, but seeing on how I am currently bitchless rendered that shit moot. Sometimes I like to write fan-fictions of my favorite show My Little Human Friendship of Badassary. What the hell is that you ask? Well its about six sexy ass female teenagers who can kick all sorts of ass while wearing high heels and dresses. Needlessly to say I became an instant fan and started my fan-fics on Hum-Fic.net. Unfortunately nopony told me on how completely fucked up the site is as one goddamn fapfic with one like and one view somehow ended up on the featured section and the popular stories list. So being the dumbass that I am I looked at the story, and it was the exact same shit as every other goddamn one-shot fapfic. A pony by the name of Anon Omous goes to the human world meets one of the sexy human teenagers and fuck...That's it. And so here I am, in my room laying down on my bed smoking a joint and contemplating my life. Even though I have a small following and I am very grateful to them for liking my shit, but damn dude 90 percent of the fans are just horny for human pussy, I bet the humans wouldn't do this shit, ya know if they existed. What? Yes I do have an older brother, but- Rumble looks over at the clock on his wall, it was 5:30 pm. "Aw shit its 5:30? Fuck all man." *BANG* BANG *BANG* THUNDERLANE I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! *BANG* BANG* BANG* YOU LAZY ASS YOU BETTER HAVE CLOUD RUNNERS CHILD SUPPORT! *BANG *BANG *BANG* Rumble sighs and heads to the front door. He figured that he better get the door before they break it down... again. "Hello Flitter and Cloud Chaser what's up?" He notices a small silver coated filly on a strap next to Cloud Chaser staring at him. "Hello to you too Cloud Runner." The two mares standing in the door angry expressions instantly turn into smiles. "Hello there Rumble." Greeted Cloud Chaser. "Is your brother home?" -but he's probably hiding, you see one night after a night of partying Flitter and Cloud Chaser called up my brother all horny and wanted to fuck. Thunderlane of course went because idea of a threesome was appealing hell even I would I do it and I know you guys would do it too don't lie. Well long story short. They fucked, Cloud Chaser got pregnant and eleven months later Cloud Runner was born. All because the condom broke...Ain't that some shit? Rumble looks at Cloud Chaser who was tending to her daughter. "I'm sorry CC but Thunderlane isn't home right now but I'm sure he'll be back later." Cloud Chaser gives her daughter to her sister. "Oh is that right?" She gently puts her hooves on his cheeks looking him in the eyes. "Rumble. Is. Your. Brother. Home?" She said it with such calmness that it made Rumble tremble. "He's in the hall closet!" Shrieked Rumble. "Please don't hurt me!" He may love his older brother but he was NOT dying a virgin. SON OF A BITCH! Cloud Chaser grins and opens the closet door. "Hello Thunderlane." She splits apart some coats where the dark gray pegasus was hiding. "Uh hi?" He said looking around. "I swear I wasn't hiding or anything." Flitter, Cloud Runner and Rumble stand behind Cloud Chaser. Thunderlane glares at his younger brother who only shrugs. "So what can I do for you Cloud Chaser?" She pulls Thunderlane out of the closet. Cloud Runner looks at her father and starts squealing and holds her hooves out. Flitter gives her over to him and he takes her in his hooves. "Hey there's my little filly." He said tossing her in the air. "You know what I want Thunderlane! Don't even play that bullshit." She said. Thunderlane grimaces and pulls out a bag of bits. "Damn girl." Cloud Chaser takes the bag and starts to head for the door. "Come on Flitter lets go get Cloud Runner some new baby clothes!" They leave the house leaving the pegasus filly with her father and uncle. "Rumble." Thunderlane said "Yeah bro?" "If you ever have sex, remember, double or nothing" Thunderlane heads to the front room with his daughter leaving Rumble all alone. Ya know, sometimes I'm glad I never had sex lest I end up like Thunderlane. But I cant help but wonder if it beats using my hoof all the time. What the fuck are you laughing at? Yes I jackoff so? You guys call it clopping? The fuck is that?! The sound that we make when we walk forward? Who the fuck came up with that bullshit? Anyway while Thunderlane was busy taking care of his daughter, I was busy checking up on Hum-Fic.net. "Son of a Bitch! Yet another fapfic takes first place." Rumble leans on his hoof and taps his desk with the other. "Man why do I even try? One pony cant go against the flow of the fandom." He turns off his computer and gets in his bed. "Why do I even waste my fucking time on that nonsense. And I'll be damned before I write a fapfic." He sighed. "How can it get any worse?" He blinks at the stupidity of his question. "I just tempted fate didn't I?" Author's Note And so my get my feet wet in the whole darker and edgier thing. It may not seem that way now. But just wait. Yes I know switching between first and third person is practically impossible but eh have to try somehow. If you would like to help a brother out just ask. Chapter 2Author's Note For some reason I foresee some dislikes on this one. Also Damn Rumble sucks to be you right now. Chapter 2 6:59...7:00 HA-HA-HA-HA-Haaa Click 7:05 HA-HA-HA-Haa Click 7:15 HA-HA Click 7:20 HAAA Click 7:25 WAKE UP. YOU ARE LAZY AND WORTHLESS SLAM 7:30 HA-HA AAANNNNDDDD POWERLESS TO STOP ME! SLAM SLAM 7:35 YOU THINK I GO AWAY?! BUT I'M STILL HERE! HA-HAA WHAM 7:40 YOU WANT PEACE AND QUIET? TOOO BAADDD HA-HAA SMASH* SMASH* SMASH* 7:50 I'LL NEVER LET YOU SLEEP AGAIN! HA-HA *CRASH* After making damn sure that his annoying ass alarm clock was destroyed Rumble returns to his bed to go back to sleep for a couple more hours. Not Broken...HA-HA-HAA! He quickly get up from his bed in a blinding rage and grab the nearest blunt object that he could find. "Oh that is fuckin it!" Rumble growled. He swings the object wildly destroying everything in sight as his not broken alarm was still laughing at him. RUMBLE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE?! KEEP IT DOWN BEFORE YOU- WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! sniff WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OHH GREAT! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID! GET YOUR LIGHT GRAY ASS DOWN HERE! Rumble groans and drops the object on the floor and looks around his messed up room. "Shit this place looks like the wasteland. Eh I'll clean it up later." After stopping by the bathroom making sure that his mane wasn't a mess he heads downstairs where Thunderlane was trying in vain to calm down the crying Cloud Runner. "Shhh, Shhh Its ok. Don't cry." He glares angry at his younger brother who just walks by ignoring his piercing gaze. "It was just your dumbass uncle." Rumble scoffs as he heads to the cabinet. "She stayed all night?" He asked grabbing a bowl and a box of cereal. "Yeah, apparently Cloud Chaser and Flitter decided to go partying again late last night." He said bouncing the foal. "Going baby shopping my ass." The fifteen year old shakes his head at his brothers misfortune. "That sucks man." He replied going into the refrigerator and retrieving some milk for his breakfast. "Man who you telling?" Thunderlane shakes his head bitterly. "I was going to go hang with the bros, maybe go to a strip club or something?" Rumble pours some milk in his bowl of cereal and begins to eat his breakfast while his brother continued his rant. "Rumble, always watch yourself, these hoes will put on leg high socks and panties and twerk dat ass for a pony and as soon you start nibbling Snaddadada guess what? I'm pregnant...Rumble what the hell do you think your doing?" Rumble looks up at Thunderlane confused. "Uh, eating cereal?" "With Cloud Chaser's breast milk?" "PHHHHTTTTTTT!" Rumble quickly spits out his food and starts wiping his tongue. Well THAT certainly ruined his breakfast. "WHY IS THAT IN THE FRIDGE?" Thunderlane was shaking his head laughing. "Tastes good does it? Pffff HAHAHAHAHA." "Fuck you man." Spat Rumble getting up from his seat and heading to the front door. "I'm going to school before I kick your ass." He opens the door and walks outside. "Hey! I'll be sure to save you some when you come home...HAHAHAHAHA" Rumble slams the door and flies off to his school. "Fucking ass." It was a sunny day in the small town of Ponyville. The birds were singing and the flowers were blooming and the townsponies were happily going about their daily lives. But for our grumpy gray pegasus, he really didn't give a flying fuck about the day or the birds, he really wanted to get this day over with so he could return home and write more human fiction. "Seriously though, who the fuck puts breast milk in a spot where somepony can just grab it?" Grumbled Rumble as continued flying through the sky. He sees the school coming into view and quickly lands on the ground. "Ok lets get this over with." The schoolhouse that was used to be one floor and one room was upgraded to a bigger multi-roomed building so that more school teachers could teach more students after Ponyvilles expansion. Basically how that went was, Twilight Sparkle thought that Ponyvilles original school game was kinda weak and told Mayor Mare to step it up. She did by the way and now we got Ponyville High, it looks nice on the outside but on the inside so much chaos happens here that Discord himself is like fuck this place. Most of the students are either crazy, horny or crazy horny and so are the teachers. But in their defense, they have a SHITTON of papers to grade that makes dating impossible. Students get so much work to do that some just say fuck it and quit. Teenage pregnancy is a thing too, but at least they have a lunchroom that doesn't serve breast milk. And what about the old Schoolhouse? Well if you need a quickie and the restroom stalls were full...Need I say more? Rumble walks up to the entrance of Ponyville High looking at students looking at him. Some are smiling, some are cooing. Why are they looking at him like that? "What the fuck ya'll looking at?" He asked A purple coated mare steps up to him and shakes his hoof. "Rumble, that's a very wonderful thing you're doing. Taking care of Scootaloo and her baby. You give us hope that there is such a thing as true love." Rumble's face scrunches up like he saw a fat guy in a thong or something. "Bitch, what the FUCK are you talking about?" He suddenly remembered that Cloud Chaser wasn't the only one who got pregnant. "Don't play dumb lover boy." She said smiling. "You and Scootaloo do make a cute couple and I wish you two the best." She walks away from Rumble who just looks horrified. "Me and Scootaloo? By Celestia's glorious white ass what the fuck did she do this time?!" He wondered as he walked inside the building. This wasn't the first time that Scootaloo tried to get Rumble's affections. She wasn't ugly or anything, just desperate and clingy. But she was the main reason that he was bitchless right now as every other mare he tried to talk to disappeared never to be seen again, but the deal breaker was her pregnancy. Long story short, she told Rumble that she was pregnant and wanted him to be her baby's daddy, Rumble's response. Bitch. Fuck you. "Man I need a smoke." Rumble said shaking his head. He heads towards one of the schools restrooms finds an open stall, closes the door, and pulls out a joint and lights it up. "Fuckin Scootaloo." "Oh Unngg." Rumble looks around at the noise. "The fuck was that?" "D-d-damn oh ohoh, fuck me! Ooooooh fuck that pussy! huff, huff I better Ungh get an A+ for this!" "Seriously." Rumble thought. "Somepony must be trying to get some extra credit." "Oh shit. I'm close. Call me Senpai and we'll see about that A+" "Senpai Senpai Senpai SENPAI!" Rumble covers his ears hoping to drown them out. But it was no good. "Huff, Huff well I think you earned that A+" "I fuckin better!" They leave the stall while Rumble just sits there smoking his joint. Yep just another day at Ponyville High he thought banging his head. "Hey man! I'm trying to finish masturbating over here!" "Ok class." Began Miss Cherilee. "Due to the high number of pregnancies, the school board requires that we teach you horny bastards the importance of safe sex...again." The classroom just stares at her blankly not really paying attention. Apple Bloom was on her phone doing something until the purple mare takes it away. "Mah phone!" "Apple Bloom listen." Cherilee said putting the phone in her desk. "This is important and you need to pay attention." "Miss Cherilee who cares?!" She replied. "You're just mad because you don't get any." Miss Cherilee stops writing on the blackboard and glares at the yellow filly. "What did you say?!" "Look, ah know it must be hard coming home to a dark and empty house. Look let me hook you up wit mah brother for a night." The purple coated teacher rolls her eyes. "How many time must we tell you that we are just good friends?" "Bitch quit lyin you know you wanna hit that." Apple Bloom grins at Cherilee who just stands in silence. "Alright you got me. I do." She said. "Ah can make it happen." She said grinning." Toss me mah phone." Cherilee wastes no time in retrieving Apple Bloom's phone from her desk and tosses it to the yellow bow wearing filly. "Hey bro whatcha doin? Oh yea. Well I got Miss Cherilee tryin to show ya a good time. Oh yea? Ok Ah'll send her over." She looks up to the spot where Miss Cherilee was standing but she was already gone. Rumble slams his head on his desk. Why did he even get out of bed this morning, then he remembered that it was his annoying ass alarm clock. He should really stop buying those. After Miss Cherilee left the class. Rumble went in to the school's computer lab checking up on his fan-fics. "Ugh, yet another futa fic in the featured section. Why are those so damn popular? Nopony would ever date one in real life." "Salutations Rumble!" Rumble slams his head on the desk. That was none other than the voice of Button Mash, extreme nerd, captain of mathematics team and the coltfriend of the sexy ass Sweetie Belle. How exactly did he manage to pull that last one off was beyond anypony. "What do you want dork?" He didn't hate him but he was jealous as fuck though. "Well me and Sweetie saw you on television last night and I just wanted to say congratulations." He said "For what?" For some reason he didn't like where this was going. "Wait. I was on T.V?!" The brown colt takes the seat next to him. "You mean you don't know?" "No dipshit I don't!" Button Mash types something on the computer and the screen changes to a place called TLC. "Oh no not this place." Rumble facehoofed. If you wanted a show about dumbass ponies doing dumbass things this was the place. They gave anypony a show. Who could forget such classics as: Tootsie Moo Moo, That one guy with the sixteen foals and five mares, and who could forget Queer eye for the Stallion Guy. Button Mash clicks a link that made Rumble cock an eyebrow. "Motherly Scootaloo?" Button Mash clicks a video that said New Episode. Hello all! My names Scootaloo and I'm fourteen years old. First I just want to say thank you to all who sent me money to support me and my son. But I have some good news everypony. I have a new coltfriend now. His name is Rumble and he is the kindest, sweetest, most handsomest colt in the world. He treats way better than what-his-name ever did. He took me out on a date last night and it was magical, he even brought me flowers! He even said that after we graduate he was going to propose to me! Hehe! I cant wait for him to a way better father than Not Rumble was. Wish me luck! And send money so my son can have a decent meal tonight! Button Mash stops the video. "It was on last night. I don't know how-" He looks over to Rumble whose coat changed from light gray to blood red. He was also shaking very very badly and his eyes were bleeding. "Uh Rumble? Are you ok? Should I go get the nurse?" He gets up from the seat. "I'm going to go get the nurse." Chapter 3Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.Chapter 4After leaving from nurse's office and making sure that his coat color turned back to gray from bloody red, Rumble wanders the student filled corridors of Ponyville High with the biggest frown of his face. His entire day has been from shitty to shittier and he was not happy about it. Well at least the school day was ending soon and he could go home and write some more stories. "Well Rumble." He said to himself. "Its been a rough day but at least it cant get any worse right?" After he was trapped between Snail's and Diamond Tiara's massage session and Scootaloo selling some type of shit about him and her getting married for the umpteenth time that he was sure that ponies were devouring like cup of chocolate ice cream he was absolutely sure it couldn't get any worse. "I cant wait for Scootaloo to return tomorrow!" Exclaimed one of his classmates happily. "It will be so romantic watching her and Rumble walk together proclaiming their love for each other." Rumble stops dead in his tracks. Scootaloo was coming back tomorrow!? No! No no no no NO! And it would seem that his classmates have already decided his fate. To be a total pussy like that so called 'vampony' from those trashy romance novels. Rumble gallops away hoping to be far far FAR away from this madness. "Hey did you hear? Scootaloo is coming back tomorrow!" "Yes I heard. We should give her a nice surprise for being so strong during her time of great struggle." Apparently, Scootaloo's eventual return to the school caused some kind of mass excitement as everypony started talking about the orange pegasus and for Rumble to run around screaming like a headless chicken. "I gotta get outta here!" He screamed as he pushed passed his fellow classmates trying to escape. He reaches the main entrance where he stops in horror. "No!" Rumble whispered breathlessly. "Nonononononononnonono." On top of the main doors stood a giant poster, well more like a drawing of him and Scootaloo kissing with a giant heart that said true lovers on it. Rumble breathing becomes a little more erratic, and should his chest be so tight? He tried to move his left foreleg but for some strange reason he couldn't feel it. In fact if he didn't know any better, he thought that he was having some kind of heart attack. Rumble collapses on the cold ground. If he was having some kind of heart attack then that wasn't good...Obliviously. "Aww look." Cooed one of his classmates. "Rumble finds the picture so sweet that it gave him a heart attack." The rest of the students look at the collapsed pegasus with smiles and other expressions of happiness as Rumble lies on the ground unconscious. "Maybe we should get him to a hospital now?" Rumble...Rumble...Wake up Rumble. Rumble looks around in the darkness for the sound of the voice. "H-Hello?" Rumble...You are dead and its time to wake up. "I'm dead?" Rumble repeated. He stands there for a couple of seconds before leaping in the air cheering. "WOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO BABY! I'M FREE!!!" What? I-But- You- Dead, ok why are you so excited about dying? Rumble stops doing barrel rolls in the air and lands with the biggest smile he had on his face all day. "Eh my life was shitty anyway. I had a extremely desperate, crazy filly who couldn't take a hint, my grades in school were shitty, and both of my parents just recently discovered that they were gay. How in the hell do you just discover that you like the same sex after being married for 42 years is beyond me. Also I hate everypony." But what about your brother and niece? Don't you love them? And what about Cloudchaser and Flitter? Those two have been with you, watching you grow up since you were a foal to the young adult you are today. "And?" Replied Rumble. "None of that matters anymore I'm dead now. Now for my eternal paradise I demand that I be sent to the Friendship of Badassary section so I can finally live my dream and be with my six lovely waifus." No Rumble's smile drops back into a frown. Did this disembodied voice really just say no? "Excuse me?" He said trying to contain the anger in his voice. "Because I could have sworn you said no." I did say No. You have not earned it. "Earned it?! EARNED IT?!! LISTEN TO ME YOU PUSSY PUNK BITCH!" WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING A PUSSY PUNK BITCH! CAUSE I ONLY SEE ONE! AND HE IS A LIGHT GRAY ASSHOLE WHO DOESN'T GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT HIS LIFE! The voice starts to mock Rumble. OHHH MY NAME IS RUMBLE I'M 15 YEARS OLD AND LIFE SUCKS WHHHAAAAAA I DRINK BREAST MILK AND JACK-OFF IN THE SHOWER EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT BECAUSE I'M TOO MUCH OF A PUSSY TO TAKE CONTROL OF MY LIFE! NEWS FLASH DICKHEAD LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE HARD! "I'm not a pussy." Pouted Rumble crossing his forelegs. Sigh, look, don't give up on your life simply because things don't go your way Rumble. Anyway we're done here. "Huh?" Its time for you to return. Rumble looks down at his hooves, and sure enough they were staring to fade away. "B-Bu- But I don't wanna go back!" Then this may. Very very soon you'll meet a filly who will change your life. " Wait! What does she look like?" Asked Rumble wiping his face. For some reason it felt very wet. Heh heh, when you see her, you'll know. Rumble slowly opens his eyes and groans. Why was this room so bright? And more importantly why was the right side of his face wet? He glances over to the right where a little pegasus filly was sucking on his face. "Augh! Cloud Runner don't do that!" Rumble sits up on the bed holding his niece. "Why do you always do that?" The foal only giggles and bounces in Rumble's hooves. "Why are you so energetic today? And where am I?" Looking around the room Rumble finds himself in a small hospital room with a single window shining some sunlight in the room and his older brother asleep on a chair. How long has he been there? The door opens and two familiar mare's enter the room gasping in surprise. "Rumble! Your awake! Thunderlane wake up!" Cried Cloudchaser. Thunderlane quickly jerks awake rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "W-Wh-What?! Is Rumble awake yet?!" He asked groggily before he saw his younger brother sitting up on the bed. He doesn't say a word as he quickly rises from his seat and embraces Rumble in a hug. "Rumble! Thank Celestia your ok!" Flitter and Cloudchaser also join in the hug while Cloud Runner looks around. "Uh, what's going on?" He asked. "And why are you hugging me? I'm not dead." "But you were dead Rumble." Flitter said. "For 15 minutes. It was the most terrifying and nerve racking 15 minutes ever. When Thunderlane told us you were in the hospital and the doctors and you were clinically dead we rushed right over." Thunderlane breaks the hug and rubs his mane. "They also said that you were so stressed out your heart gave out. And they mentioned something about high blood pressure. Look Rumble, I know Cloud Runner can be a hoof full but she is noting to stress over." "No its not her." Rumble replied looking at his niece. "I just have some problems at school that's all." Cloudchaser takes her daughter from Rumble. "Not only that I just recently discovered something horrible, but at the same time something good." The three elder ponies look at each other then back at Rumble. "Rumble when you 'died' what did you see?" Asked Cloudchaser. Rumble stays silent for a few minutes before giving his answer. "I don't remember." Flitter and Cloudchaser look at each other then at Thunderlane. "We should go. Rumble get plenty of rest. Ok. And Thunder I'll take Cloud Runner with me." Thunderlane nods his head indicating that it was fine with him. The sisters leave the room leaving Rumble and Thunderlane alone in the room. It was awkwardly quiet as Rumble sits on the bed looking around. He could really go for a smoke right about now to relax, but after his near death experience, going for a joint seemed unlikely right now. "Hey, Rumble." Rumble looks over towards his brother who for once in his life looked very serious. "I know that happened between mom and dad was pretty stupid and that sometimes I talk a lot of shit but I want you to know that I'm here for ya." He puts a hoof on Rumble's shoulder. " And I may not have all the answers but if you ever need me I'll always be there because your my bro and I love ya." He notices that Rumble starts tearing up. "Uh you ok? You're starting to cry a little bit oh oh I mean its ok Rumble, I'll always be here for you and Cloud Runner and even the girls despite them being bitches sometimes." After returning home from the hospital and Rumble's reassurance that he wasn't crying, the 15 year old colt was currently reading fan-fics about his favorite character about his favorite show. He was currently reading a new chapter on one of his favorite stories that he has been waiting for a month. "Well that was exciting. I love it when others portray Pastel's character as a strong human female. It makes her look sexy " He returns to the main page to check out some more stories. "Well this one looks interesting, lets check it out." Rumble clicks on the link taking him to the story of his interest. It had no cover art and it only six likes but he checks it out anyway. "Wow." Rumble muttered. "This is quite good, this is really good." Rumble gives the story a like and favorite. He knew that some stories without cover arts could be hidden gems with the potential to be great stories. With a great small description of the plot and a great cast of characters was all that was needed for him. But unfortunately not for most ponies who only look at pictures as they would probably tell you that a picture is worth a thousand words. How can you not judge a book by its cover if a single picture tells 999 percent more? Rumble shakes his head pushing away the thought from his mind, there he goes getting all psychological again, maybe some fresh air will clear his mind. Rumble heads down stairs where his brother was sitting on the couch. "Hey Thunderlane! I'm going out for a bit." "Ok but don't stay out too late I ordered take out tonight." Rumble nods and leaves the house. It was a nice evening in the small town to Ponyville. The sun was beginning to set leaving the once blue sky and beautiful shade of orange and the townsponies were either turning in for the night or watching the sunset with their special somepony because it was romantic or some shit. "HEY RUMBLE!" Rumble only walks faster ignoring the voice calling out to him. "Oh shit! Maybe if I keep walking and ignore him maybe he will go away." But his wish was completely ignored as Button Mash steps in front of Rumble with a wide smile. "Hiya Rumble! I heard what happened to you today at school. Are you feeling ok? "I was doing fine till you showed up." Rumble said with his usual scowl on his face. "What the hell do you want?" Button's smile falls to a more normal expression. "Well I was seeing on how you was feeling because isn't that what friends do?" "Since when were we friends?" Questioned Rumble walking away but Button Mash gets in front of him again. "Seriously, shouldn't you be with Sweetie Belle or something? Like watching the sunset or whatever shit couples like to do?" "Well, we already watched the sunset." Explained Button Mash. "Sweetie Belle wanted to go to Scootaloo's house to help her catch up with all the school work that she missed. Because you know she's coming back tomorrow right?" Rumble stomps his hoof on the ground. "I'm well of that! She has a LOT of nerve throwing all this bullshit on me!-" "Uhm, Excuse me?" Rumble and Button Mash turn to the side where a young unicorn colt was standing looking lost. He had a gray coat with a silvery mane and golden yellow eyes. He had no cutie mark and looked to be around the same age as Button Mash and Rumble. "The fuck do you want?" Asked Rumble. "Uhm, I-uh I'm a uh little lost." He replied with his ears lowered. "Can you help me?" "Sure we'll help you." Button said to the unicorn. "My names Button Mash and this here is Rumble." Rumble starts growling at the gray unicorn who backs away slightly. "Don't worry, that's how he says hello." The sliver maned unicorn puts a hoof on his chest taking some deep breaths. "Oh thank goodness, for a minute there I thought he was going to attack me." He walks back towards them and extends his hoof. "My n-name is S-Silver Star. I-I just r-recently m-moved here. Nice to meet you." He finished his greeting with a bow. "Oh! You just moved here. Then that means that you and your family must have ran into Pinkie Pie by now." Button said smiling. Silver Star glances downward. "W-we have. S-she threw us a p-party and e-everyt-thing, I-I don't l-like large crowds. I was mostly h-homed s-schooled. B-but now I have t-to go to s-someplace called P-Ponyville High." Button Mash gasps causing Silver Star to jump back. "THAT'S AWESOME! YOU GET TO GO TO SCHOOL WITH US!" He grabs Rumble and Silver Star by the necks pulling them in for a hug. "AND WE'LL BE BEST FRIENDS!" Silver Star looks uncomfortable with the gesture while Rumble eye starts twitching. "Oh there you are Button Mash." Another pegasus descends from the sky and lands on the ground. "I was just on my to your house." He gives Button Mash a notebook. "Thanks for letting me borrow your notes while I was sick." Button Mash flashes the pegasus a warm smile. "No problem Rain Catcher." Rumble escapes from Button Mash's grip while Silver Star was still caught in the brown earth pony's grip struggling to free himself. "Who's this asshole?" Asked Rumble rubbing his neck. Button Mash lets go of Silver Star who falls on the ground gasping for air. "Rumble, are you serious?" Replied Button Mash. "This is Rain Catcher." he said pointing at the pony in question. Rumble just stands there blinking absentmindedly. "He goes to the same school as us." Rumble just blinks again. "Come on man! He's even in the same classroom as us! How can you not know him?" "Well that's easy." Rumble replied. "One, I don't give a fuck, and two, I was preeetttttyyyyy high every time I was in class. So yeah." "You should really stop smoking Rumble." Button told the gray pegasus. "Its not good for you." "Neither does sitting on your ass all-night playing video games." Button Mash just stares at Rumble. "Yeah aint talking shit now are ya?" Rumble said with a smug smirk. "Well as much as I love to continue to waste my time with you jerk-offs, I have to not be stupid somewhere else." Rumble takes off in the sky flying off in the distance. "LATER LOSERS!" "BYE RUMBLE!" Button screamed. He turns and looks at the other two with a cheerful smile. "What a nice guy." Author's Note And so the pilot is done. Next episode is The New Girl. Also I may try to make this a weekly thing. The keyword there is try. Yes I know its not very funny but you know what they say. 'practice makes you suck less.'
Rumble's Modern LifeWhat's good ya'll? The names Rumble and I just turned fifteen years old. I go to Ponyville high and I have no friends, but I don't give a fuck about friends. What? you don't like that I said the word fuck? Fuck you asswipe. Anyway my cutie mark is a thunder cloud because I make the skies rumble when I fly an shit. I always thought that my cutie mark would have something to do with making the fillies shake with pleasure, but seeing on how I am currently bitchless rendered that shit moot. Sometimes I like to write fan-fictions of my favorite show My Little Human Friendship of Badassary. What the hell is that you ask? Well its about six sexy ass female teenagers who can kick all sorts of ass while wearing high heels and dresses. Needlessly to say I became an instant fan and started my fan-fics on Hum-Fic.net. Unfortunately nopony told me on how completely fucked up the site is as one goddamn fapfic with one like and one view somehow ended up on the featured section and the popular stories list. So being the dumbass that I am I looked at the story, and it was the exact same shit as every other goddamn one-shot fapfic. A pony by the name of Anon Omous goes to the human world meets one of the sexy human teenagers and fuck...That's it. And so here I am, in my room laying down on my bed smoking a joint and contemplating my life. Even though I have a small following and I am very grateful to them for liking my shit, but damn dude 90 percent of the fans are just horny for human pussy, I bet the humans wouldn't do this shit, ya know if they existed. What? Yes I do have an older brother, but- Rumble looks over at the clock on his wall, it was 5:30 pm. "Aw shit its 5:30? Fuck all man." *BANG* BANG *BANG* THUNDERLANE I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! *BANG* BANG* BANG* YOU LAZY ASS YOU BETTER HAVE CLOUD RUNNERS CHILD SUPPORT! *BANG *BANG *BANG* Rumble sighs and heads to the front door. He figured that he better get the door before they break it down... again. "Hello Flitter and Cloud Chaser what's up?" He notices a small silver coated filly on a strap next to Cloud Chaser staring at him. "Hello to you too Cloud Runner." The two mares standing in the door angry expressions instantly turn into smiles. "Hello there Rumble." Greeted Cloud Chaser. "Is your brother home?" -but he's probably hiding, you see one night after a night of partying Flitter and Cloud Chaser called up my brother all horny and wanted to fuck. Thunderlane of course went because idea of a threesome was appealing hell even I would I do it and I know you guys would do it too don't lie. Well long story short. They fucked, Cloud Chaser got pregnant and eleven months later Cloud Runner was born. All because the condom broke...Ain't that some shit? Rumble looks at Cloud Chaser who was tending to her daughter. "I'm sorry CC but Thunderlane isn't home right now but I'm sure he'll be back later." Cloud Chaser gives her daughter to her sister. "Oh is that right?" She gently puts her hooves on his cheeks looking him in the eyes. "Rumble. Is. Your. Brother. Home?" She said it with such calmness that it made Rumble tremble. "He's in the hall closet!" Shrieked Rumble. "Please don't hurt me!" He may love his older brother but he was NOT dying a virgin. SON OF A BITCH! Cloud Chaser grins and opens the closet door. "Hello Thunderlane." She splits apart some coats where the dark gray pegasus was hiding. "Uh hi?" He said looking around. "I swear I wasn't hiding or anything." Flitter, Cloud Runner and Rumble stand behind Cloud Chaser. Thunderlane glares at his younger brother who only shrugs. "So what can I do for you Cloud Chaser?" She pulls Thunderlane out of the closet. Cloud Runner looks at her father and starts squealing and holds her hooves out. Flitter gives her over to him and he takes her in his hooves. "Hey there's my little filly." He said tossing her in the air. "You know what I want Thunderlane! Don't even play that bullshit." She said. Thunderlane grimaces and pulls out a bag of bits. "Damn girl." Cloud Chaser takes the bag and starts to head for the door. "Come on Flitter lets go get Cloud Runner some new baby clothes!" They leave the house leaving the pegasus filly with her father and uncle. "Rumble." Thunderlane said "Yeah bro?" "If you ever have sex, remember, double or nothing" Thunderlane heads to the front room with his daughter leaving Rumble all alone. Ya know, sometimes I'm glad I never had sex lest I end up like Thunderlane. But I cant help but wonder if it beats using my hoof all the time. What the fuck are you laughing at? Yes I jackoff so? You guys call it clopping? The fuck is that?! The sound that we make when we walk forward? Who the fuck came up with that bullshit? Anyway while Thunderlane was busy taking care of his daughter, I was busy checking up on Hum-Fic.net. "Son of a Bitch! Yet another fapfic takes first place." Rumble leans on his hoof and taps his desk with the other. "Man why do I even try? One pony cant go against the flow of the fandom." He turns off his computer and gets in his bed. "Why do I even waste my fucking time on that nonsense. And I'll be damned before I write a fapfic." He sighed. "How can it get any worse?" He blinks at the stupidity of his question. "I just tempted fate didn't I?" Author's Note And so my get my feet wet in the whole darker and edgier thing. It may not seem that way now. But just wait. Yes I know switching between first and third person is practically impossible but eh have to try somehow. If you would like to help a brother out just ask.
Chapter 2Author's Note For some reason I foresee some dislikes on this one. Also Damn Rumble sucks to be you right now. Chapter 2 6:59...7:00 HA-HA-HA-HA-Haaa Click 7:05 HA-HA-HA-Haa Click 7:15 HA-HA Click 7:20 HAAA Click 7:25 WAKE UP. YOU ARE LAZY AND WORTHLESS SLAM 7:30 HA-HA AAANNNNDDDD POWERLESS TO STOP ME! SLAM SLAM 7:35 YOU THINK I GO AWAY?! BUT I'M STILL HERE! HA-HAA WHAM 7:40 YOU WANT PEACE AND QUIET? TOOO BAADDD HA-HAA SMASH* SMASH* SMASH* 7:50 I'LL NEVER LET YOU SLEEP AGAIN! HA-HA *CRASH* After making damn sure that his annoying ass alarm clock was destroyed Rumble returns to his bed to go back to sleep for a couple more hours. Not Broken...HA-HA-HAA! He quickly get up from his bed in a blinding rage and grab the nearest blunt object that he could find. "Oh that is fuckin it!" Rumble growled. He swings the object wildly destroying everything in sight as his not broken alarm was still laughing at him. RUMBLE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE?! KEEP IT DOWN BEFORE YOU- WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! sniff WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OHH GREAT! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID! GET YOUR LIGHT GRAY ASS DOWN HERE! Rumble groans and drops the object on the floor and looks around his messed up room. "Shit this place looks like the wasteland. Eh I'll clean it up later." After stopping by the bathroom making sure that his mane wasn't a mess he heads downstairs where Thunderlane was trying in vain to calm down the crying Cloud Runner. "Shhh, Shhh Its ok. Don't cry." He glares angry at his younger brother who just walks by ignoring his piercing gaze. "It was just your dumbass uncle." Rumble scoffs as he heads to the cabinet. "She stayed all night?" He asked grabbing a bowl and a box of cereal. "Yeah, apparently Cloud Chaser and Flitter decided to go partying again late last night." He said bouncing the foal. "Going baby shopping my ass." The fifteen year old shakes his head at his brothers misfortune. "That sucks man." He replied going into the refrigerator and retrieving some milk for his breakfast. "Man who you telling?" Thunderlane shakes his head bitterly. "I was going to go hang with the bros, maybe go to a strip club or something?" Rumble pours some milk in his bowl of cereal and begins to eat his breakfast while his brother continued his rant. "Rumble, always watch yourself, these hoes will put on leg high socks and panties and twerk dat ass for a pony and as soon you start nibbling Snaddadada guess what? I'm pregnant...Rumble what the hell do you think your doing?" Rumble looks up at Thunderlane confused. "Uh, eating cereal?" "With Cloud Chaser's breast milk?" "PHHHHTTTTTTT!" Rumble quickly spits out his food and starts wiping his tongue. Well THAT certainly ruined his breakfast. "WHY IS THAT IN THE FRIDGE?" Thunderlane was shaking his head laughing. "Tastes good does it? Pffff HAHAHAHAHA." "Fuck you man." Spat Rumble getting up from his seat and heading to the front door. "I'm going to school before I kick your ass." He opens the door and walks outside. "Hey! I'll be sure to save you some when you come home...HAHAHAHAHA" Rumble slams the door and flies off to his school. "Fucking ass." It was a sunny day in the small town of Ponyville. The birds were singing and the flowers were blooming and the townsponies were happily going about their daily lives. But for our grumpy gray pegasus, he really didn't give a flying fuck about the day or the birds, he really wanted to get this day over with so he could return home and write more human fiction. "Seriously though, who the fuck puts breast milk in a spot where somepony can just grab it?" Grumbled Rumble as continued flying through the sky. He sees the school coming into view and quickly lands on the ground. "Ok lets get this over with." The schoolhouse that was used to be one floor and one room was upgraded to a bigger multi-roomed building so that more school teachers could teach more students after Ponyvilles expansion. Basically how that went was, Twilight Sparkle thought that Ponyvilles original school game was kinda weak and told Mayor Mare to step it up. She did by the way and now we got Ponyville High, it looks nice on the outside but on the inside so much chaos happens here that Discord himself is like fuck this place. Most of the students are either crazy, horny or crazy horny and so are the teachers. But in their defense, they have a SHITTON of papers to grade that makes dating impossible. Students get so much work to do that some just say fuck it and quit. Teenage pregnancy is a thing too, but at least they have a lunchroom that doesn't serve breast milk. And what about the old Schoolhouse? Well if you need a quickie and the restroom stalls were full...Need I say more? Rumble walks up to the entrance of Ponyville High looking at students looking at him. Some are smiling, some are cooing. Why are they looking at him like that? "What the fuck ya'll looking at?" He asked A purple coated mare steps up to him and shakes his hoof. "Rumble, that's a very wonderful thing you're doing. Taking care of Scootaloo and her baby. You give us hope that there is such a thing as true love." Rumble's face scrunches up like he saw a fat guy in a thong or something. "Bitch, what the FUCK are you talking about?" He suddenly remembered that Cloud Chaser wasn't the only one who got pregnant. "Don't play dumb lover boy." She said smiling. "You and Scootaloo do make a cute couple and I wish you two the best." She walks away from Rumble who just looks horrified. "Me and Scootaloo? By Celestia's glorious white ass what the fuck did she do this time?!" He wondered as he walked inside the building. This wasn't the first time that Scootaloo tried to get Rumble's affections. She wasn't ugly or anything, just desperate and clingy. But she was the main reason that he was bitchless right now as every other mare he tried to talk to disappeared never to be seen again, but the deal breaker was her pregnancy. Long story short, she told Rumble that she was pregnant and wanted him to be her baby's daddy, Rumble's response. Bitch. Fuck you. "Man I need a smoke." Rumble said shaking his head. He heads towards one of the schools restrooms finds an open stall, closes the door, and pulls out a joint and lights it up. "Fuckin Scootaloo." "Oh Unngg." Rumble looks around at the noise. "The fuck was that?" "D-d-damn oh ohoh, fuck me! Ooooooh fuck that pussy! huff, huff I better Ungh get an A+ for this!" "Seriously." Rumble thought. "Somepony must be trying to get some extra credit." "Oh shit. I'm close. Call me Senpai and we'll see about that A+" "Senpai Senpai Senpai SENPAI!" Rumble covers his ears hoping to drown them out. But it was no good. "Huff, Huff well I think you earned that A+" "I fuckin better!" They leave the stall while Rumble just sits there smoking his joint. Yep just another day at Ponyville High he thought banging his head. "Hey man! I'm trying to finish masturbating over here!" "Ok class." Began Miss Cherilee. "Due to the high number of pregnancies, the school board requires that we teach you horny bastards the importance of safe sex...again." The classroom just stares at her blankly not really paying attention. Apple Bloom was on her phone doing something until the purple mare takes it away. "Mah phone!" "Apple Bloom listen." Cherilee said putting the phone in her desk. "This is important and you need to pay attention." "Miss Cherilee who cares?!" She replied. "You're just mad because you don't get any." Miss Cherilee stops writing on the blackboard and glares at the yellow filly. "What did you say?!" "Look, ah know it must be hard coming home to a dark and empty house. Look let me hook you up wit mah brother for a night." The purple coated teacher rolls her eyes. "How many time must we tell you that we are just good friends?" "Bitch quit lyin you know you wanna hit that." Apple Bloom grins at Cherilee who just stands in silence. "Alright you got me. I do." She said. "Ah can make it happen." She said grinning." Toss me mah phone." Cherilee wastes no time in retrieving Apple Bloom's phone from her desk and tosses it to the yellow bow wearing filly. "Hey bro whatcha doin? Oh yea. Well I got Miss Cherilee tryin to show ya a good time. Oh yea? Ok Ah'll send her over." She looks up to the spot where Miss Cherilee was standing but she was already gone. Rumble slams his head on his desk. Why did he even get out of bed this morning, then he remembered that it was his annoying ass alarm clock. He should really stop buying those. After Miss Cherilee left the class. Rumble went in to the school's computer lab checking up on his fan-fics. "Ugh, yet another futa fic in the featured section. Why are those so damn popular? Nopony would ever date one in real life." "Salutations Rumble!" Rumble slams his head on the desk. That was none other than the voice of Button Mash, extreme nerd, captain of mathematics team and the coltfriend of the sexy ass Sweetie Belle. How exactly did he manage to pull that last one off was beyond anypony. "What do you want dork?" He didn't hate him but he was jealous as fuck though. "Well me and Sweetie saw you on television last night and I just wanted to say congratulations." He said "For what?" For some reason he didn't like where this was going. "Wait. I was on T.V?!" The brown colt takes the seat next to him. "You mean you don't know?" "No dipshit I don't!" Button Mash types something on the computer and the screen changes to a place called TLC. "Oh no not this place." Rumble facehoofed. If you wanted a show about dumbass ponies doing dumbass things this was the place. They gave anypony a show. Who could forget such classics as: Tootsie Moo Moo, That one guy with the sixteen foals and five mares, and who could forget Queer eye for the Stallion Guy. Button Mash clicks a link that made Rumble cock an eyebrow. "Motherly Scootaloo?" Button Mash clicks a video that said New Episode. Hello all! My names Scootaloo and I'm fourteen years old. First I just want to say thank you to all who sent me money to support me and my son. But I have some good news everypony. I have a new coltfriend now. His name is Rumble and he is the kindest, sweetest, most handsomest colt in the world. He treats way better than what-his-name ever did. He took me out on a date last night and it was magical, he even brought me flowers! He even said that after we graduate he was going to propose to me! Hehe! I cant wait for him to a way better father than Not Rumble was. Wish me luck! And send money so my son can have a decent meal tonight! Button Mash stops the video. "It was on last night. I don't know how-" He looks over to Rumble whose coat changed from light gray to blood red. He was also shaking very very badly and his eyes were bleeding. "Uh Rumble? Are you ok? Should I go get the nurse?" He gets up from the seat. "I'm going to go get the nurse."
Chapter 4After leaving from nurse's office and making sure that his coat color turned back to gray from bloody red, Rumble wanders the student filled corridors of Ponyville High with the biggest frown of his face. His entire day has been from shitty to shittier and he was not happy about it. Well at least the school day was ending soon and he could go home and write some more stories. "Well Rumble." He said to himself. "Its been a rough day but at least it cant get any worse right?" After he was trapped between Snail's and Diamond Tiara's massage session and Scootaloo selling some type of shit about him and her getting married for the umpteenth time that he was sure that ponies were devouring like cup of chocolate ice cream he was absolutely sure it couldn't get any worse. "I cant wait for Scootaloo to return tomorrow!" Exclaimed one of his classmates happily. "It will be so romantic watching her and Rumble walk together proclaiming their love for each other." Rumble stops dead in his tracks. Scootaloo was coming back tomorrow!? No! No no no no NO! And it would seem that his classmates have already decided his fate. To be a total pussy like that so called 'vampony' from those trashy romance novels. Rumble gallops away hoping to be far far FAR away from this madness. "Hey did you hear? Scootaloo is coming back tomorrow!" "Yes I heard. We should give her a nice surprise for being so strong during her time of great struggle." Apparently, Scootaloo's eventual return to the school caused some kind of mass excitement as everypony started talking about the orange pegasus and for Rumble to run around screaming like a headless chicken. "I gotta get outta here!" He screamed as he pushed passed his fellow classmates trying to escape. He reaches the main entrance where he stops in horror. "No!" Rumble whispered breathlessly. "Nonononononononnonono." On top of the main doors stood a giant poster, well more like a drawing of him and Scootaloo kissing with a giant heart that said true lovers on it. Rumble breathing becomes a little more erratic, and should his chest be so tight? He tried to move his left foreleg but for some strange reason he couldn't feel it. In fact if he didn't know any better, he thought that he was having some kind of heart attack. Rumble collapses on the cold ground. If he was having some kind of heart attack then that wasn't good...Obliviously. "Aww look." Cooed one of his classmates. "Rumble finds the picture so sweet that it gave him a heart attack." The rest of the students look at the collapsed pegasus with smiles and other expressions of happiness as Rumble lies on the ground unconscious. "Maybe we should get him to a hospital now?" Rumble...Rumble...Wake up Rumble. Rumble looks around in the darkness for the sound of the voice. "H-Hello?" Rumble...You are dead and its time to wake up. "I'm dead?" Rumble repeated. He stands there for a couple of seconds before leaping in the air cheering. "WOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO BABY! I'M FREE!!!" What? I-But- You- Dead, ok why are you so excited about dying? Rumble stops doing barrel rolls in the air and lands with the biggest smile he had on his face all day. "Eh my life was shitty anyway. I had a extremely desperate, crazy filly who couldn't take a hint, my grades in school were shitty, and both of my parents just recently discovered that they were gay. How in the hell do you just discover that you like the same sex after being married for 42 years is beyond me. Also I hate everypony." But what about your brother and niece? Don't you love them? And what about Cloudchaser and Flitter? Those two have been with you, watching you grow up since you were a foal to the young adult you are today. "And?" Replied Rumble. "None of that matters anymore I'm dead now. Now for my eternal paradise I demand that I be sent to the Friendship of Badassary section so I can finally live my dream and be with my six lovely waifus." No Rumble's smile drops back into a frown. Did this disembodied voice really just say no? "Excuse me?" He said trying to contain the anger in his voice. "Because I could have sworn you said no." I did say No. You have not earned it. "Earned it?! EARNED IT?!! LISTEN TO ME YOU PUSSY PUNK BITCH!" WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING A PUSSY PUNK BITCH! CAUSE I ONLY SEE ONE! AND HE IS A LIGHT GRAY ASSHOLE WHO DOESN'T GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT HIS LIFE! The voice starts to mock Rumble. OHHH MY NAME IS RUMBLE I'M 15 YEARS OLD AND LIFE SUCKS WHHHAAAAAA I DRINK BREAST MILK AND JACK-OFF IN THE SHOWER EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT BECAUSE I'M TOO MUCH OF A PUSSY TO TAKE CONTROL OF MY LIFE! NEWS FLASH DICKHEAD LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE HARD! "I'm not a pussy." Pouted Rumble crossing his forelegs. Sigh, look, don't give up on your life simply because things don't go your way Rumble. Anyway we're done here. "Huh?" Its time for you to return. Rumble looks down at his hooves, and sure enough they were staring to fade away. "B-Bu- But I don't wanna go back!" Then this may. Very very soon you'll meet a filly who will change your life. " Wait! What does she look like?" Asked Rumble wiping his face. For some reason it felt very wet. Heh heh, when you see her, you'll know. Rumble slowly opens his eyes and groans. Why was this room so bright? And more importantly why was the right side of his face wet? He glances over to the right where a little pegasus filly was sucking on his face. "Augh! Cloud Runner don't do that!" Rumble sits up on the bed holding his niece. "Why do you always do that?" The foal only giggles and bounces in Rumble's hooves. "Why are you so energetic today? And where am I?" Looking around the room Rumble finds himself in a small hospital room with a single window shining some sunlight in the room and his older brother asleep on a chair. How long has he been there? The door opens and two familiar mare's enter the room gasping in surprise. "Rumble! Your awake! Thunderlane wake up!" Cried Cloudchaser. Thunderlane quickly jerks awake rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "W-Wh-What?! Is Rumble awake yet?!" He asked groggily before he saw his younger brother sitting up on the bed. He doesn't say a word as he quickly rises from his seat and embraces Rumble in a hug. "Rumble! Thank Celestia your ok!" Flitter and Cloudchaser also join in the hug while Cloud Runner looks around. "Uh, what's going on?" He asked. "And why are you hugging me? I'm not dead." "But you were dead Rumble." Flitter said. "For 15 minutes. It was the most terrifying and nerve racking 15 minutes ever. When Thunderlane told us you were in the hospital and the doctors and you were clinically dead we rushed right over." Thunderlane breaks the hug and rubs his mane. "They also said that you were so stressed out your heart gave out. And they mentioned something about high blood pressure. Look Rumble, I know Cloud Runner can be a hoof full but she is noting to stress over." "No its not her." Rumble replied looking at his niece. "I just have some problems at school that's all." Cloudchaser takes her daughter from Rumble. "Not only that I just recently discovered something horrible, but at the same time something good." The three elder ponies look at each other then back at Rumble. "Rumble when you 'died' what did you see?" Asked Cloudchaser. Rumble stays silent for a few minutes before giving his answer. "I don't remember." Flitter and Cloudchaser look at each other then at Thunderlane. "We should go. Rumble get plenty of rest. Ok. And Thunder I'll take Cloud Runner with me." Thunderlane nods his head indicating that it was fine with him. The sisters leave the room leaving Rumble and Thunderlane alone in the room. It was awkwardly quiet as Rumble sits on the bed looking around. He could really go for a smoke right about now to relax, but after his near death experience, going for a joint seemed unlikely right now. "Hey, Rumble." Rumble looks over towards his brother who for once in his life looked very serious. "I know that happened between mom and dad was pretty stupid and that sometimes I talk a lot of shit but I want you to know that I'm here for ya." He puts a hoof on Rumble's shoulder. " And I may not have all the answers but if you ever need me I'll always be there because your my bro and I love ya." He notices that Rumble starts tearing up. "Uh you ok? You're starting to cry a little bit oh oh I mean its ok Rumble, I'll always be here for you and Cloud Runner and even the girls despite them being bitches sometimes." After returning home from the hospital and Rumble's reassurance that he wasn't crying, the 15 year old colt was currently reading fan-fics about his favorite character about his favorite show. He was currently reading a new chapter on one of his favorite stories that he has been waiting for a month. "Well that was exciting. I love it when others portray Pastel's character as a strong human female. It makes her look sexy " He returns to the main page to check out some more stories. "Well this one looks interesting, lets check it out." Rumble clicks on the link taking him to the story of his interest. It had no cover art and it only six likes but he checks it out anyway. "Wow." Rumble muttered. "This is quite good, this is really good." Rumble gives the story a like and favorite. He knew that some stories without cover arts could be hidden gems with the potential to be great stories. With a great small description of the plot and a great cast of characters was all that was needed for him. But unfortunately not for most ponies who only look at pictures as they would probably tell you that a picture is worth a thousand words. How can you not judge a book by its cover if a single picture tells 999 percent more? Rumble shakes his head pushing away the thought from his mind, there he goes getting all psychological again, maybe some fresh air will clear his mind. Rumble heads down stairs where his brother was sitting on the couch. "Hey Thunderlane! I'm going out for a bit." "Ok but don't stay out too late I ordered take out tonight." Rumble nods and leaves the house. It was a nice evening in the small town to Ponyville. The sun was beginning to set leaving the once blue sky and beautiful shade of orange and the townsponies were either turning in for the night or watching the sunset with their special somepony because it was romantic or some shit. "HEY RUMBLE!" Rumble only walks faster ignoring the voice calling out to him. "Oh shit! Maybe if I keep walking and ignore him maybe he will go away." But his wish was completely ignored as Button Mash steps in front of Rumble with a wide smile. "Hiya Rumble! I heard what happened to you today at school. Are you feeling ok? "I was doing fine till you showed up." Rumble said with his usual scowl on his face. "What the hell do you want?" Button's smile falls to a more normal expression. "Well I was seeing on how you was feeling because isn't that what friends do?" "Since when were we friends?" Questioned Rumble walking away but Button Mash gets in front of him again. "Seriously, shouldn't you be with Sweetie Belle or something? Like watching the sunset or whatever shit couples like to do?" "Well, we already watched the sunset." Explained Button Mash. "Sweetie Belle wanted to go to Scootaloo's house to help her catch up with all the school work that she missed. Because you know she's coming back tomorrow right?" Rumble stomps his hoof on the ground. "I'm well of that! She has a LOT of nerve throwing all this bullshit on me!-" "Uhm, Excuse me?" Rumble and Button Mash turn to the side where a young unicorn colt was standing looking lost. He had a gray coat with a silvery mane and golden yellow eyes. He had no cutie mark and looked to be around the same age as Button Mash and Rumble. "The fuck do you want?" Asked Rumble. "Uhm, I-uh I'm a uh little lost." He replied with his ears lowered. "Can you help me?" "Sure we'll help you." Button said to the unicorn. "My names Button Mash and this here is Rumble." Rumble starts growling at the gray unicorn who backs away slightly. "Don't worry, that's how he says hello." The sliver maned unicorn puts a hoof on his chest taking some deep breaths. "Oh thank goodness, for a minute there I thought he was going to attack me." He walks back towards them and extends his hoof. "My n-name is S-Silver Star. I-I just r-recently m-moved here. Nice to meet you." He finished his greeting with a bow. "Oh! You just moved here. Then that means that you and your family must have ran into Pinkie Pie by now." Button said smiling. Silver Star glances downward. "W-we have. S-she threw us a p-party and e-everyt-thing, I-I don't l-like large crowds. I was mostly h-homed s-schooled. B-but now I have t-to go to s-someplace called P-Ponyville High." Button Mash gasps causing Silver Star to jump back. "THAT'S AWESOME! YOU GET TO GO TO SCHOOL WITH US!" He grabs Rumble and Silver Star by the necks pulling them in for a hug. "AND WE'LL BE BEST FRIENDS!" Silver Star looks uncomfortable with the gesture while Rumble eye starts twitching. "Oh there you are Button Mash." Another pegasus descends from the sky and lands on the ground. "I was just on my to your house." He gives Button Mash a notebook. "Thanks for letting me borrow your notes while I was sick." Button Mash flashes the pegasus a warm smile. "No problem Rain Catcher." Rumble escapes from Button Mash's grip while Silver Star was still caught in the brown earth pony's grip struggling to free himself. "Who's this asshole?" Asked Rumble rubbing his neck. Button Mash lets go of Silver Star who falls on the ground gasping for air. "Rumble, are you serious?" Replied Button Mash. "This is Rain Catcher." he said pointing at the pony in question. Rumble just stands there blinking absentmindedly. "He goes to the same school as us." Rumble just blinks again. "Come on man! He's even in the same classroom as us! How can you not know him?" "Well that's easy." Rumble replied. "One, I don't give a fuck, and two, I was preeetttttyyyyy high every time I was in class. So yeah." "You should really stop smoking Rumble." Button told the gray pegasus. "Its not good for you." "Neither does sitting on your ass all-night playing video games." Button Mash just stares at Rumble. "Yeah aint talking shit now are ya?" Rumble said with a smug smirk. "Well as much as I love to continue to waste my time with you jerk-offs, I have to not be stupid somewhere else." Rumble takes off in the sky flying off in the distance. "LATER LOSERS!" "BYE RUMBLE!" Button screamed. He turns and looks at the other two with a cheerful smile. "What a nice guy." Author's Note And so the pilot is done. Next episode is The New Girl. Also I may try to make this a weekly thing. The keyword there is try. Yes I know its not very funny but you know what they say. 'practice makes you suck less.'
