Equestrian Idiot (A Tale of a Cutie Mark)
ShadowBurn
Chapter 1: Equestrian Idiot (A Tale of a Cutie Mark)
By Kung Fu Jesus
“Huh” he sighed.
ShadowBurn was alone in his room, in the house he had bought in Boltamare. He had just finished cleaning it for the third time (Sorting his clothes by colour rather than design this time). He was lying on his bed looking at his painfully blank ceiling, the only sound being lyre music coming from gramophone in the corner. The song was just about to end and the music stop when a dark purple aura enveloped the needle and put it at the start of the record.
ShadowBurn was a unicorn, He had a dark grey coat with a jet black mane and tail and for almost a year now he put purple highlights in both, He liked the colour purple. He had dark red eyes the shone as bright as phoenix’s flame, his mane was the reason he was named Shadow and his eyes were why he was named Burn. His last name didn’t matter, he had no use for it now, he was his own pony now.
And then, there was his cutie mark. His cutie mark appeared to be and eagle sat upon a globe with the letters U.N.S.C on it. Writing alone is already an incredibly rare thing to find on a cutie mark but the way he got his cutie mark is questionable to say the least.
It was almost three years ago now, He had just finished school and in the autumn was about to start college. College and still no cutie mark? Shadow wasn’t bothered by this really he never saw the appeal of having a mark on your butt control what you were going to do for the rest of your life. He was heading to his friend’s house, when he opened the door the smell of weed was immediately present “Oh great, he’s stoned… Again” with a sigh he walked through the door and called up to his friend “Hey sparks, get your flank down here!”
“Coming” spark replied. A few moments later and spark had made it down the stairs and into the kitchen. Spark was a stallion with dirty white coat, two-toned green hair and dull blue eyes (which were currently bloodshot) he spoke in a low, slow gravelly voice “So why’d you come round homes?”
“Because you asked me to” deadpanned Shadow
“Oh yeah.. That’s right” there was a long silence while shadow waited for him to say something.
“Spark!” Shadow half shouted, not wanting to put up with his friend when he was like this.
“Oh. Right. Yeah follow me” Spark then walked out the kitchen towards the garden and with a sigh Shadow followed him.
Spark and Shadow went into Sparks garage, Spark quickly trotted through the disorganised clutter until he reached a small cleared out area containing two black boxes, one of which was considerably larger than the other, “what is this?” Shadow asked.
“I was digging some ‘plants’ up from my garden, when I found this. Buried.”
“That’s cool but, what is it!”
“It’s called… An Xbox” Spark announced with much drama.
“And what does it do” asked shadow, still not convinced.
“Well it took me a while to figure out but that box connects to the bigger box with that rope stuff, and then you have to power both of them with magic.”
“Yeah and then what” Shadow asked with a hint of curiosity in his voice.
“This” As he spoke Spark’s horn lit up in a dull grey light that was matched by the glow from around the boxes. After a few moments the larger box lit up and green X appeared seemingly from nowhere as did an equally mystically “swoosh” sound. At first shadow thought it was one of those “motion pictures” they use in schools to teach the fillies and colts about the weather and stuff, but no this was way too detailed and in colour!
“Mother of Celestia” Gasped Shadow.
“I know right” said Spark “but that’s not even the best part.
With another glow of his horn Spark picked up an oddly shaped devise from behind the “Xbox” the devise was all black accept for some rainbow coloured mounds on the right and some green flashing lights in the middle. “What does that thing do” said Shadow.
“It lets us play!” said Spark, Shadow was about to ask when Sparked shushed him.
Within minutes they were watching a still image of a cliffside over-looking a beautiful mountain range with the word R E A C H in the centre of the screen, there were also the words “RESUME SOLO CAMPAIGN” and “MAIN MENU” written in the bottom left corner. Spark did something on the device and the picture changed and changed again, now they were looking at what could only be described as angry looking squids using glowing crab claws to attack monsters made completely out of metal “Well that’s… Interesting” Shadow noted.
“Okay so this is a fictional story about a war but it’s between two sets of metal creatures, one side is red, the other is blue.”
“And what happens”
“That’s the thing, you can use this to control the characters and make them do whatever you want!”
“Whatever I want eh?” Said Shadow with a mischievous grin on his face.
“You disgust me” deadpanned Spark
“Sorry” Said Shadow “so how do you control them?”
“Well…” after ten minutes of discussing the controls Spark levitates out a second device or “controller” as he put it, and gave it to Shadow who enveloped it with his own magic. Spark then pressed the green button on the controller and the game began”
Sword base (The name Spark gave to their surroundings) was an entire building free for exploration an entirely new world fun of wonderful and fascinating… BOOM! The blue creature lay lifeless on the floor with the red one standing above it victorious. “Hey I wasn’t ready” shouted Shadow, Spark snickered in response.
BOOM! Once again the blue figure lay lifeless and defeated when a stallions voice said “Game over” then a box appeared showing red had 25 points and blue had -1, how was shadow supposed to know the little blue round things would explode. “I demand a
Re-match” Shadow said angrily.
“Okay, just try not to suck so much this time.” Shadow gave him a “buck you” look then put his focus back on the screen.
Shadow was losing 17-0 and had just re-spawned he was running through a room when a glowing thing in the corner caught his eye. As approached an announcement appeared saying “Hold X to pick up” then some kind of picture beneath it, Shadow followed the screens instructions and was soon holding the fluorescent stick in his hands “ Hey Spark what does this” he tried to say before Spark cut him off.
“Assassination!” Shadow quickly made his character turn around only to see the red figure punch him in the face Shadow instinctively pushed on the RT button causing his character to lunge forward and brutally slaughter the red figure. “Holy Celestia, You killed me!”
“wha- I did. Sorry” pleaded Shadow
“No it’s a good thing you’re getting better” said Spark with a smile.
That game ended 25-5 with red winning.
The rest of the night consisted of many different battles set in different locations and with ever changing scores.
25-0
25-5
25-8
23-13
20-15
25-16
20-19
“Whoa that last one was SO close” Spark said, panting a little from the intensity of their battle.”
“Yeah I think I’ll be able to beat you next game” exclaimed Shadow.
“Please, I still have ten times the skill you do” retorted Spark.
“Oh yeah? Then how about we make this interesting.”
“How much you thinking” said Spark narrowing his eyes.
“10 bits?” asked Shadow.
“It’s on” said Spark before the two of them shook hooves.
The next game was intense, Slayer Pro on Pinnacle, Spark quickly took the lead with the sniper rifle but Shadow managed to take him out with the rockets, the lead went back and forth with spark being more accurate and winning most of the lost range duels, Shadow was a faster think and won almost every close up battle, the scores were close all the way through but it came down to one kill. The score was at 24-24 for over a minute both parties trying to get the other in a position where they could get the kill easier, Spark was using the sniper and Shadow was using the shotgun. Spark had control of the tower and was regularly checking the entrances, Shadow was hiding among the rocks to the left of the tower waiting for his moment. The moment Spark went off to check the right hand side Shadow set off, staying crouched as to not appear on radar (a trick he discovered and had the sense to not tell Spark about it) he made his way up the first ramp and into the main building before quickly making his way up the other ramp until he was stood directly behind the red metal monster with the sniper rifle. With a smile Shadow Shouted “Guten Tag” before pressing the RB button as hard as his horn would allow, His character’s arm made contact with the red characters back and when into an a sequence where the blue character stabs the red character in the head. “Game over” the voice announced.
He’d won. Shadow Won 24-25 he was so excited he dropped the controller and started jumping round in circles saying “yes yes yes yes yes.”
It wasn’t for another hour that he discovered he had gotten his cutie mark, his special talent was playing a game called Halo, a game that only two ponies knew about. “Smashing” thought Shadow.
And know he was sat here, on his bed. No job. No opportunities. No future. And probably the worst thing, no mare friend, all because of that mark on his flank.
